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(If you are reading this on any PAY site this is a STOLEN WORK, the author has NOT Given Permission for it to be here. If you're paying to read it, you're being cheated too because you can read it on Archiveofourown for FREE.)

From Tony's point of view the charity banquet had been a success. He woke up next to a hot blond, even if the guy did refuse to kiss him.

From Steve's point of view the charity banquet had been a disaster. Sure, talking to Tony Stark had been great. The man was witty, friendly, and a technological genius. When Steve had mentioned Rogersmed's interest in leasing StarkTech's diagnostics for their clinics, he'd pulled out a StarkPad and begun custom designing one as Steve described what they needed it to do.

It had been fascinating, watching something new and brilliant being created right before his eyes, while Tony (please, Mr. Stark was my dad) had talked a mile a minute, both hands moving nearly as fast, grinning and occasionally looking straight at Steve with those really nice, big brown eyes. It was flattering having someone appreciating his input, not glancing around as if to say 'this shrimp can't be the founder and driving force behind a Fortune 500 corporation'. But Steve should have taken more time to note that while he sipped club soda, Tony had been knocking back the booze like water.

By the time the banquet was over he realized that Tony was three sheets to the wind, and absolutely in no condition to be left alone. Sure, Stark's bodyguards and chauffeur would take him home, but would they stay the night to make sure he didn't aspirate his own vomit? So when Tony grinned crookedly at him and invited him to come 'see his gadgets', he'd agreed. It wasn't as if he was in the closet, and he doubted one skinny blond even rated a ping on Stark Industries 'Tony Oh No' radar. The man was constantly in the news, about half and half divided between his genius and his idiocy. You had to be something really special before going home with Tony Stark got you in the headlines. Steve was just another skinny kid from Brooklyn.

Tony had leaned against him in the limo, all warm and cuddly, but not handsy, which was nice. Steve always felt the cold and Tony put out BTUs like a space heater. The butler met them at the door of the mansion, and helped-- well, really did most of it-- Steve get Tony up to his bedroom and then discreetly disappeared.

Steve had made sure Tony drank a lot of water and took off anything that could impede circulation, falling back into the old habits he'd learned while dealing with his father. Say this much for Tony, he was an amiable drunk, not a pugnacious bastard like Steve's dad had been. He apparently loved to cuddle, whining when Steve tried to pull away.

Finally Steve had given up, stripped down to his briefs and slid under the covers with Tony. A couple pats on the back, a scratchy goatee rub against his chest, and a long, boozy exhalation later, Tony was out for the count. Steve had shrugged and let himself doze off. In for a penny, in for a pound.


"Well, hello, gorgeous."

Steve opened his eyes and frowned. Tony's bedhead was truly impressive, especially from up close, with Tony leaning on an elbow right beside him. "Do you even remember my name?"

"Sure! Um... Stefan..."


"Yeah, Steve. So, you know, you're here and I'm here and I figure you wouldn't be here if you were really hating the idea."

Steve ran his hand through his hair. "I brought you home and stayed with you because I'm a responsible adult."

"Ouch," Tony said. "So, is that a no?"

"It should be." Steve tossed the covers back and got up. His very expensive suit had been designed to hide flaws, but he wasn't ashamed of himself. He did the best he could with what he'd been given in the genetic lottery. So he didn't have Tony Stark's broad shoulders and arms like a blacksmith. So what. At least he was taller than Tony. More than he'd thought before he saw the special lifts in Tony's shoes.

Tony whistled. "You have amazing bone structure." But he wasn't looking at Steve's face.

Steve felt himself flush. Yeah, he wakes up like a giant, but let's face it, most of the people who've wanted him have looked at the rest of him first and treated him like a china doll. He's no one's toy. "You are very rude, Tony." That got him another grin.

"Yeah, but y'know, you still haven't given me an answer."

"As a responsible adult, I don't have sex with people I don't know."

"I have condoms! Any color and flavor you want."

"Accidents happen." Steve was tempted, but no, Tony was cute, but definitely trouble. Steve should say something polite, get his clothes and leave. In a minute. Tony was awfully cute and Steve could look, couldn't he?

"You're no fun, you know that?" Tony sat up, opened the drawer of the bedside table and rummaged. "Here, if you're worried about the medical aspect, try this baby." He pressed a finger against the small device he pulled out of the drawer, and then handed it to Steve, while he made an altogether too obvious a display of sucking a tiny drop of blood off his finger.

Steve couldn't resist looking at the gadget. There was a display screen that scrolled, showing all the tests it had done, declaring the sample free of all STDs. "This is... amazing."

"Yeah, legal won't let us market it yet. Have to go through testing and approval, yadda yadda. Looking for a reputable outside company to help with that, actually."

"So that's why you were so interested in me." Steve was a little disappointed. "And why you had that diagnostic design ready to go."

"No. Actually... I was told to stay away from you. My company doesn't trust me to be diplomatic." Tony pouted, actually pouted. "But... hey... I have a thing for tall, smart blonds."

Steve stood there and considered his options. Really. For several whole seconds. Then he pressed his finger against the device and watched it go through another set of readings. "Well, what do you know, I'm clean, too." He handed the device back to Tony and smiled.