Lexa ran her hand through blonde hair. Her green eyes watched her lover’s side as it rose and fell in time with her breathing. She was glad Clarke was still breathing. Thoughts of the past few weeks raced through her mind.
“I can hear you thinking.” Clarke mumbled sleepily against Lexa.
“Sorry..” Lexa whispered. Clarke moved her arm to have it wrap around Lexa’s torso.
“What’s on your mind?” Clarke asked softly.
“Just..these past few weeks…” Lexa said.
“Lex…” Clarke sighed.
“I know, I know..” Lexa sighed. “I just can’t help but think…” She shook her head slightly. “Can I asked you something..?”
“Of course, anything.” Clarke said, rubbing soothing circles on the girl
“What...what hurt the most?” Lexa asked softly, feeling Clarke tighten her grip on her. “When you were there...and all the things that happened...what hurt the most out of everything?”
“Besides being apart from you?” Clarke asked softly. Lexa hummed a yes. “Transforming...it hurt a lot more than it’s supposed to.”
“What do you mean?” Lexa asked, she wanted to know but wasn’t going to push her.
“It..when a wolf transform, there is a brief amount of pain.” Clarke said. “I mean, all your bones are reshaping to take on another form. So there is pain, but it normally only last a few moments, a minute if that. The first time you transform, it hurts the worst, but after doing it so many times you get used to the spin.” Clarke shrugged slightly. “I don’t even feel it anymore.”
“But...when she made me transform…” Clarke took in a shaky breathe. Lexa rubbed her hand up and down her back. “It hurt so much worse...It felt like every bone in my body was breaking over and over again...especially as much as she made me transform…” Clarke shuddered, remembering the pain. “That was the most pain I’ve ever felt in my entire life...it felt worse than when I was in the Blood Rage…” Clarke squeezed her eyes, her breathing started coming in rapidly.
“Hey, shh.” Lexa said softly, pulling her closer to her. “You’re safe now.” She gripped Clarke tightly as she felt hot tears on her shirt. Clarke shook in her arms as the tears bled from her eyes.
“It’s over.” Lexa said, rubbing her back. “You’ll never have to experience that pain again.”