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There was a lock on the door of Tony's workshop for a reason. Not because he was afraid of internal espionage, no, Jarvis was more than enough to handle anyone actually stupid enough to try and physically break in for a little petty theft. And not because Tony was unfriendly, which he was, but that was a whole other set of issues to be dealt with on another day.

No, there were locks on his door because Tony's workshop was like his own version of a playground, with all the best toys, and Tony did not play well with others. He needed to think in here, a lot, and it was damned hard to think properly when someone was hanging around, yammering into his ears about stockholders and meetings and everything else, and would you pay attention for two minutes, Tony?

Yeah, the lock on the door was awesome or it used to be. Before Tony had invited a group of superheroes to move in and somehow, slowly but surely, everyone who lived here had gotten ahold of the code. Worse, everyone who got the code tended to use it and it didn't matter how often Tony changed it or how loudly he complained, somehow or another he always had someone hanging around.

On any given day, Bruce might stop in to compare notes or Steve would stop in, asking for a spar or checking to see if Tony had remembered to eat that day. Clint would just appear out of nowhere and it didn't seem to matter how many cameras he had going or how many times Tony had reminded him that he actually did have a heart condition, there he would be again and Tony would have another year's worth of adrenaline dumped into his bloodstream. Natasha was less often and usually she had curt questions or requests for new gear that was interesting enough to distract Tony from his own projects and get started on a new one.

Yep, on any given day someone was here annoying him and Tony would have given in and gotten an old school deadbolt if he hadn't slowly but surely discovered that he loved it. It wasn't so bad, really, having a group of superheroes hanging around, even if it was hell on the cleaning bills and his blood pressure.

Today seemed like it was Thor's day to be annoying. He was wandering around the workshop as Tony worked, touching things that he wasn't supposed to with curiosity and Tony was happy to explain anything Thor asked about. Big guy was actually pretty smart when it came down to it and he caught on quickly.

It was hard not to like Thor. He was a lot like a big, shaggy dog, one that lit up with happy wagging when someone scratched his ears or sulked and pissed on the floor when he was annoyed. Not a comparison that Tony was going to share with a guy who biceps that were nearly the size of Tony's head but hey, that was fine. Tony had found out a long time ago that most of his thoughts should probably stay that way.

Today, though, he got the idea that Thor wanted something. His restless wandering had the impression of someone trying to work up their nerve and that alone had Tony's curiosity perking like an old-style coffee maker. Thor was not usually a guy who had a problem making his needs known, as the grocery delivery service well knew.

"Might as well spit it out, big guy," Tony said, finally, patience not really on his list of attributes. Besides, if Thor kept messing around with things he was either going to break something or someone and Tony suspected strongly that it wasn't going to be Thor who was the broken one.

"I have a request of you," Thor said without preamble, like he'd just been waiting for Tony to ask. He crossed big arms over his chest and leaned against a table and his eyes darted around, looking at anything but Tony.

Okay, there was only one thing that got Thor this worked up. Tony sighed. "Thought your brother was behaving."

"He is," Thor assured him hastily, "It is not any cause for concern amongst our allies."

"Which is why you're talking to me and not calling a group meeting," Tony said, flipping his welding goggles back down. Might as well work while they talked. "So what do you need from me?"

"I am in need of a mediator," Thor said, his voice carrying over the hiss of the welding torch.

"A mediator?" Tony repeated, tasting the word. That was something no one had asked of him before. Consultant, yes, engineer, superhero, he'd gone all those routes. Mediator was definitely a new one.

"Yes. One who is not of Asgard, one who would be willing to help."

Which most people of Asgard wouldn't, at least not where Loki was concerned. Most people of Earth wouldn't be lining up either, frankly, so Tony could see where Thor would have a short list. Still…

"Not that I don't appreciate the confidence, Road House," Tony said absently, making minute adjustments to the right hand repulsor. Last time they'd been in the field he'd been veering a little towards the left and little miscalculations were best fixed before they became big miscalculations that were likely to send him swerving into a building. "But I'm not exactly known for my soothing, rational nature."

"My brother appreciates neither soothing nor rationales," Thor said, placidly. He stepped in close, about three inches too far into Tony's personal space and with most people it would be annoying. With Thor it was just like another plea to scratch behind his ears and Tony sighed, laying his tools aside to give a very determined Norse god his full attention.

"Tony Stark, I have been assured that you are the correct person to help me with my difficulty," Thor said solemnly. "Will you help me heal the rift that yawns between my brother and I, help me heal the wounds that remain bleeding?"

Tony studied Thor's face, his earnest, pleading expression. Ah, hell, how often did a guy get a chance to help out a god in a bind?

"Well, when you put it like that—" Tony twisted his mouth into a smirk, "How can I say no?"

This wasn't exactly what Tony had had in mind.

Not that he didn't still appreciate Thor's faith in him; hey, if any of the Avengers had the skills for this particular endeavor, it would be Tony. Aside from the whole, genius, billionaire entrepreneur thing, he had plenty of other skills. Tony Stark was the exact opposite of a one-trick pony, thank you very much.

That said, right now he was trying very hard to breathe, trying to do anything with Loki's mouth on his, Loki, bad guy Loki, Loki who was kind of insane and evil and whose mouth was icy-cool, his tongue slick and clever as his nickname. Loki was kissing him and Jesus, fuck, when exactly had Tony volunteered for this?

Loki pulled away, their lips parting on a moist sound. Even his breath was cool and it was soothing against Tony's overheated face. He glanced over Tony's shoulder, mouth twisting into something resembling a smile, "Enjoying the view?"

And yeah, it was a little hard to forget that Thor was here too, mostly because he was pressed against Tony's back, close enough that his voice was loud against Tony's ear, reverberating through his chest in a bizarre, contrasting thrum with his arc reactor. "Yes, brother," Thor said, low and rumbling, and the green of Loki's eyes went venomous.

Not an entirely comfortable thing to see when he was still tight against Tony, one knee pressed firmly between Tony's legs.

"No," Loki hissed out and Tony could feel the faint spray of spittle against his face. Christ, couldn't Asgardians yell without spitting? "Not your brother. Stop clinging to that childish fantasy! Our blood only mingles in battle."

"And yet, my heart is yours," Thor said, softly. His breath was warmer, stirring the fine hair at Tony's temple. It was the weirdest physical Oreo that Tony had ever been the filling in. There was heat against his back even through Thor's heavier clothes and Tony's t-shirt and jeans; Thor radiated heat like he was his own personal sun, and his hands on Tony's biceps, almost big enough to circle his arms, practically bled warmth into him.

Which was good because Loki was really not, was actually the complete opposite and his mouth was like sucking on a peppermint lifesaver. Wintry cold and sweet, his breath chill as he leaned in to Tony's other side, to the ear that Thor wasn't exhaling his heat against.

"Should you not rejoice then? We are not brothers in truth," A wet tongue slid teasingly along Tony's ear and he had to bite back a groan. "Should this not be you?"

"No," Thor gritted out, he sounded pained, he sounded…fuck, and he felt like he was hard, pressed firm against the small of Tony's back. "You are my brother."

"I'm not. Let me," Loki coaxed. "Let me have you." Hands on Tony, long, nimble fingers and he slipped Tony's shirt over his head with barely a wrist-flick, and that cool mouth was pressing kisses against Tony's chest, lower, licking at naval, mouthing the skin at the waistband of his jeans. Thor's hands went tight on his arms and he was probably going to have bruises there, cookie-cutter discolorations the exact size and shape of a god's hands.

Okay, this was like the weirdest, pseudo-incestuous therapy session ever and Tony was really starting to wonder what kind of reputation he actually had that Thor had figured he'd be perfect for this job.

Loki licked his way back up, pausing to dip his cool tongue into the shallow indent at the base of Tony's throat before he laid both hands on Tony's chest and pushed. Moved him and Thor both, stumblingly, into another room and Tony had no idea where they actually were. Some apartment somewhere, sparse and elegant and the room he was getting herded into had a nice, large bed in it and a tube of some kind of lubricant on an end table.

All right so this was happening now. And maybe Tony should be protesting; as far as he knew mediator was not some kind of euphemism for replacement fuck. Should have, would have, could have; Tony had a list of things that might actually be a better choice than this but the time for that was really more along the time Loki had first kissed him. Two Norse gods were feeling him up with every intention of fucking him and maybe it wasn't the best choice but Tony had never been known for making the best choices, just the most interesting.

Tony was naked faster than he might have believed, two sets of hands made very short work of jeans and socks, left him bare and it was Thor who twined their hands together, drew him across the bed to lay on his stomach, Thor who was kneeling in front of him, shifting his grip to Tony's wrists and Tony didn't try to wonder just exactly what that meant. This whole scenario was like vacationing in metaphor, everything meant something, every touch, every gesture that these two spent on Tony's skin was a replacement for something else.

He couldn't see Loki, not anymore, but Tony felt the bed shift as Loki climbed on it and maybe he was kneeling too, yeah, shifting between Tony's spread legs and his hands settled on the backs of Tony's knees, sliding upward like they knew exactly where they were going, like they had an agenda that was taking them right to Tony's ass where strong fingers kneaded, briefly, before Loki spread him wide with two thumbs.

Okay, that was getting right into things. Tony exhaled, shakily, the coolness of lube adding to the cold of Loki's fingers and one slipped inside him, twisting with purpose.

"Oh, he's very tight," Loki murmured, pressing one long finger deep inside while Tony squirmed, torn between hitching his hips up towards it or wriggling free. One deliberate finger-curl settled that for him and Tony collapsed into the sheets with a moan, Christ, that felt incredible, and he barely noticed Loki asking Thor if he wouldn't rather be on his knees himself, would he be just as tight?

Above his head the two of them were still squabbling, Jesus, and Tony gave up trying to follow it. Brothers, not brothers, blah blah, and all Tony could do was hold on to two fistfuls of very high thread-count sheets, biting his tongue against all the little whimpers and pleading that were catching in his throat, threatening to spill out of him in one long, garbled cry.

Didn't dare make a sound, not one, because Thor and Loki were arguing, sure, but Loki was still fucking into him with one long, clever finger and Thor had shifted both hands to Tony's back, stroking his shoulders, combing through his hair, and every touch was nearly absent, like maybe Thor wasn't even aware he was doing it and Tony didn't care so long as he didn't stop.

Two fingers inside him now and fuck, the second he was capable of talking again Tony was going to tell Thor to give it up, it'd be so fucking worth it. Let Loki bend him over, brother or not, just spread his legs and take it all in, and suddenly, every noise that Tony was biting back burst out of him in one desperate sound.

"God!" Tony sobbed out and the two beings in the room who went by that title startled, like they'd only just noticed him there.

If he hadn't been riding on the sweaty border of frantic, Tony might have been insulted.

"Ah," Loki said thoughtfully, "But we are being rude to our guest." He wiggled his fingers with an obscene sort of skill and Tony let out a garbled cry, shaking, sweat dripping into his eyes. Cool lips touched his bare hip, moving against him as Loki murmured, "Oh, dear, we have been unkind."

"Indeed. My apologies, Tony, I—"

"Yeah, yeah, that's great, that's…that's awesome," Tony rasped out. "Could someone just fuck me or suck me or something, fucking please," His voice actually gave out into a reedy little whistle of breath as he was abruptly moved, the hot line of Thor's body shifting away and cool skin on his inner thighs as he was pushed up onto his knees.

"I believe that can be arranged," Loki said smoothly. Right, yes, right there, the tip of a cock against him and even that felt oddly cool. Weird.

Sudden pressure and Tony groaned, trying not to tense. He was plenty slick and he wanted it, spread his legs a little further and tried to get a little leverage but it still wasn't going in easy. He could feel Loki shifting his weight, leaning harder into it and finally, finally, the head popped in and Tony couldn't bite back a yelp, muffled it against his wrist.

Okay, that, that hurt a little, the stretch of it unexpected, and one of the hands on his hip shifted to the small of his back, rubbing in little circles, coaxing him to relax.

"You are tight, Stark," Loki gritted out, "Much tighter than I would have expected from one of your experience. Unless…"

He shifted, hands on Tony's hips, moving him, sliding deeper inside and Tony let out another garbled sound.

"Why, brother, you brought me a virgin!" Loki hissed, very nearly a laugh. And there were things Tony could say about that, things on top of things, things stacked up like fucking Russian dolls because he'd fucked plenty of people, thank you, fucked women and men, he'd been happy to shove his dick into just about any slick orifice for years, and just because he'd kept his own orifices dick-free did not mean—

"A virgin," Loki breathed it into his ear and he sounded delighted, like Thor had given him all his Christmas and birthday and Thanksgiving and fucking Arbor Day presents at once.

Okay, yeah, so who was Tony to ruin that kind of joy?

And as much as having someone's cock in him was both painful and awesome, it was not enough of a distraction that he didn't just hear Loki call Thor brother. Thor sure as hell didn't miss it, his hands flexing on Tony's shoulders bruisingly hard, but the big guy was smart enough at least not to say anything. His knee was right next to Tony's head and Tony shifted to bury his face against it, whimpering as Loki rocked his hips, pushing in a little more.

A large, warm hand cradled his head and Tony managed to open one eye, peering up at Thor. Who looked a little concerned, like maybe he'd been thinking Tony had already bent over for half the population of New York and finding out that, no, actually, Tony had kept his ass out of the reach of others was cause for alarm.

Well, hell, that's what you get for listening to gossip.

"Relax," Loki murmured behind him. "Relax, you're going to love this, Tony Stark."

Tony didn't have enough air to tell him that maybe he already did. It was still painful, seesawing on that edge of almost too much, and he could feel Loki's bare hips against his ass, deep as he could get, then, and it was good, it was so fucking good. Until he slid an arm around Tony's waist, hauling him up on his knees so that he was straddling Loki's lap and it felt like everything inside him was rearranging themselves around the cock in him.

"Jesus!" Tony garbled out, flailing for something, anything, to hold on to and found Thor, miles and miles of big Asgardian god right there for the grabbing. He was still fully dressed, only his arms were bare and that was where Tony latched on to him, nails digging in as he clutched.

Thor caught him up just like the hero he was, held onto him and helped Tony find his balance. It put him within inches of Tony's face and those blue, blue eyes were right there but they weren't looking at Tony. Were, in fact, focused somewhat lower, maybe on the spread of Tony's thighs over Loki's, maybe on the cool hand that was sliding low on Tony's belly, lower, grazing the heat of his cock where it hung heavy between his legs.

Tony didn't know and really didn't care. All he cared about just now was the faint rocking of Loki's hips against him, shifting, like the world's weirdest distraction. Thor's mouth was close to his, terribly close, and Tony wasn't the only one to notice it.

"Kiss him," Loki murmured, low, in his ear and Tony did, mindlessly, pressed their mouths together with sloppy ferocity. Thor didn't respond, his beard against Tony's made him think delirious thoughts of Velcro but he didn't move, nothing but warm, closed lips. Then he did and fuck, everything about Thor was big. Big muscles, big mouth, big tongue, and he had both hands on Tony's head, holding him still for hard kisses, slick pressure of tongue and teeth.

Dimly, Tony heard a hiss of sound, registered that it was Loki and then the first real thrust dragged a shout out of Tony, mostly muffled into Thor's mouth. Oh god, oh fuck, whatever patience had kept Loki still for this long had snapped like a soggy twig and now he was moving, hands on Tony's hips holding him still for every upward surge of his hips. Ramming into him with real purpose, jarring him and Thor apart and Tony scrabbled to hang onto him before he banged his face into the stone wall that Thor called a chest.

It hurt, it felt amazing, and just the sounds Loki was making were enough to fill Tony's balls with a warm, blue glow of need. Deep, thick grunts that spoke of pleasure and need, and Loki wasn't giving him an inch. Or rather, he was giving Tony a lot of inches and Tony wondered if this was like going into shock. His brain was scrambled, giving over to the hot snap of pleasure synopses.

His grip on Thor was pretty much the only thing keeping Tony upright and maybe it was a good thing he was still dressed. Thor's choice of wardrobe had plenty of handholds.

Plenty of places to grab and grip and Tony could follow the path of them downward, until he found his hands on Thor's thighs. Felt the strain of muscle beneath them and he didn't have much in the way of coordination, not with the way Loki was trying to fuck him straight down to the core of the earth, but Tony could manage to get one hand over the hard bulge at the crotch, gripping maybe too-hard, good thing Thor was a god.

He couldn't see anything, x-ray vision was limited to those of the mutant persuasion, but Tony imagined what lay beneath those pants. Thor made a little rough little sound, and then there were hands against his own, not Thor's, cool and long-fingered and they knew Norse clothing way better than Tony. Opened them and fuck, Thor really was big everywhere. The sound he made when Tony touched him, fuck, Tony could come from that alone.

"You have a wicked tongue, Tony Stark," Panted into his ear, Loki hadn't even had to pause in the proceedings, shit, they made 'em tough on Asgard. "Make use of it."

Use his tongue. Yeah, Tony could do that. This much at least he'd done before, slicked his tongue up the length of Thor's cock before swallowing down as much as he could of it. Jesus, the taste, a hard reminder that Thor was not human. Call him a god, an alien what the hell ever, not human, not, and he tasted as though purple were a flavor, not cheap bubblegum grape but pure electric, practically tingled on his tongue.

Not even a minute in his jaw was aching and Tony had a hand wrapped around the base, trying as much as he could not to choke on cock while another one was driving into him with stuttering determination, rhythm faltering and there hadn't been words in a while. Nothing but slick sounds, the obscene, wet cadence of Loki riding into him and Thor sliding in and out of Tony's mouth. Thor at least was gentle, never pushing hard, his hands guiding rather than forcing, like someone had taught him a long time ago that he had to be careful and Tony's gag reflex would like to send them an effusive thank you note.

Instead, he could only show his gratitude with suction and muffled moans, every cry he made stifled equal parts by cock and the sounds two Asgardians made when they fucked some poor human from earth. Low grunts, harsh swearing, words Tony didn't even understand and the sound Loki made as he came was gorgeous and pained and Tony couldn't help yelping out loud, fuck, that was cold, how the hell did someone come like he'd been rubbing his dick with ice cubes?

There was a hand in his hair that was not Thor's, yanking him up painfully hard and Thor was crowded against him before Tony could do more than yowl in protest, wrapping one large hand around both their cocks, driving them together until the white-hot rush of orgasm was thrumming up Tony's spine and he came with a hoarse shout, spilling hot and wet over Thor's hand and cock and his own thighs, felt like he couldn't stop coming, all slick and strange and perfect.

The spatter of Thor's orgasm, his groan of pleasure, was almost like an afterthought. Tony was already sagging down, held upright by the simple fact that he was sandwiched between two guys who could bench press him with one hand. His jaw was sore, his ass was worse, and he felt like the middle of a ten person bukakke scene. Honestly, if he tried to walk right now, which he really, really couldn't, Tony was afraid he might ruin the carpeting.

It was much, much easier to just kneel right here, although the ache in his knees was starting to register. By tomorrow Tony thought was going to look like one large bruise and Tony was also very sure that no part of him was going to care.

Opening his eyes was a cruel necessity but Tony managed it, blinking wide when he noticed that Loki had his chin propped on one of Tony's shoulders and Thor was right there as well, so close they had to be inhaling each other's breath. It was a silent, frozen moment and even though oxygen was still a high priority, Tony's heart still hammering away, for just a second he held his breath.

Then Loki turned his head away.

"This resolved nothing," Loki whispered, harshly, "It changes nothing."

"No, it does not," Thor said, softly and the aching hurt in his voice was like something tangible.

"I don't think I can walk," Tony chimed in weakly and suddenly he had the full attention of two Asgardian gods who had just tried to fuck him into the ground. Mattress. Whatever. Well, hey, he wasn't needy or anything but he was starting to get the idea that he'd done these two a solid. They could at least get him a wet washcloth, preferably warm.

The world turned on its head and Tony yelped as Loki moved him, rolled him to his back and straddled him. Those cool hands that had touched Tony in many, many of his best places were laced suddenly around his throat, thumbs pressing hard into the vulnerable softness beneath his jaw.

God, Loki was going to kill him. No, Thor wouldn't let him. Would he? An hour ago Tony would have been pretty confident in that statement but two hours ago he would have been pretty confident Thor wouldn't let his brother bend him over and fuck him into not-walking, so admittedly, his confidence in his knowledge of the world was a little shaky at the moment.

Black spots were wavering in his vision when Loki finally loosened his grip, green eyes drinking in Tony's face, taking in whatever expression was there before finally resting on his mouth.

"Hm," Loki said, thoughtfully, "Bring this one with you again next time."

Next time, Tony wondered, but he couldn't really talk with his mouth suddenly smothered with cool, soft lips, tongue licking between his. The grip on his throat eased away and there was a large, warm hand replacing the cold ones, soothing the bruises that were already rising up.

Tony opened his eyes and found Thor watching them, watching Loki kiss him and Tony couldn't read his expression, too tired and sore and brain-dead to do anything, even when Loki pulled away. Even when Thor took his place, licking his brother's taste from Tony's lips with gentle care and yeah, next time, next time, Tony was going to step up on the mediating.

It took every ounce of strength he had to push at Thor's shoulders and even though he probably wouldn't have nudged a kitten, Thor took the hint. He started to draw back, only to gasp into Tony's mouth as he grabbed two fistfuls of his hair, shoving and twisting until Thor was on his back and Tony was straddling him. Thor was still mostly dressed, really fucking unfair, that was, and Tony bit his lower lip in punishment, hard, drawing out a startled groan and, just, taking his own for one quick moment.

He'd fucking well earned this much.

The hand at his throat was starting to be familiar and Tony followed the pull of it until he was sitting up again, a cool mouth against the back of his neck, humming soft amusement against his skin.

"Next time, Tony Stark," Loki murmured, "Next time, I want to see you fucking him."

The obscenity rolled from Loki's tongue like it had been born there and Tony shivered, Loki still bare against him and his sweat was as cold as the rest of him.

"Next time," Breathed chilly against him like a promise and Tony swallowed hard and nodded. He was sore and sticky and maybe, maybe a little lost, and Thor was still beneath him, Loki behind him, brother and brother, fire and ice.

His brain was already on next time.

"How can I say no?" Tony croaked out and there were hands on him, stroking light and soothing, cold and hot tangling together as Tony sighed and went with it. There were worse decisions he could make. Probably.

The hands moving over him were starting to feel a lot more like this time than next time, Thor shifting beneath him and Loki curling around him, and that was okay, that's fine.

Tony thought he had a little mediating left in him.