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The Company had found a pub in Rivendell, and they were all drinking either the potent wine, or the powerful ale. Some were drunk off their arses, but some had control, surprisingly.

Bilbo, however, had absolutely no control. He had had a sip of the strong ale, and he now had drunk a couple pints of it. The dwarves laughed when he tried to walk. He tripped over his foot and fell flat on his face. Kili, Fili and Dwalin laughed themselves onto the floor.

"Are you alright, Bilbo?" Balin asked.

"I am okee," he said, stumbling up and back onto his chair. "I need another one."

"Oh, no, you don't, Bilbo. You are way too drunk." Bofur tried getting Bilbo to stand up, but the halfling was stronger than he looked, even when drunk.

"Y'know, Bovur, I never realished how handshome you are." He poked Bofur in the chest to try to emphasise his comment.

"Come on, Bilbo, we have to get you to bed."

"Ooh, bed! That shoft, warm bed the elvesh were kind enough to let me ushe, right?" He giggled. "I'm right, aren't I? Yesh, I am mosht definitely right. Aren't I a shmart Hobbit?" He laughed and fell into Bofur's arms.

"Yes, you are a very smart Hobbit, but now, you have to be a good Hobbit and go to bed."

"Oh, but being good ish boring! I wanna be a bad boy and have lotsh of fun!"

"Nope, sorry Bilbo." Bofur opened the door to Bilbo's room and carried him inside. He set him on the bed and started to leave.


"Yes, Bilbo?"

"Where'sh my goodnight kish?"

"You don't need one anymore, you're older than two."


"What?" He was starting to get tired of this game.

"Pleashe?" He looked at him with big puppy eyes.

"Oh, all right. One goodnight kiss." He kissed Bilbo on the cheek.

"No, Bovur! Not there," Bilbo whined.

"Then where?"

Bilbo pointed to his lips and puckered them. Bofur smiled. "Alright, Bilbo." He pecked him on the lips. "Are you going to go to bed now?"

"Only if you shtay here."

Bofur sighed. "Okay, I'll stay. But only if you promise to go to sleep."

"I promishe."

"Good. Let's get some of those clothes off, make you just a little more comfortable."

"Alrighty." Bilbo tried to unbutton his vest and shirt, but he couldn't see very well, thanks to his drunkenness. Bofur had to help. He slipped the shirts off and tossed them onto a nearby chair.

"Okay, Bilbo, now you have to lay down so I can put the covers over you."

Bilbo shook his head. Bofur gave an exasperated sigh. "And why not?" Bilbo patted the space next to him.

"Pleashe? I don't wanna shleep alone. I'm shcared of the dark."

"Aww, the little Hobbit is afraid of the dark?"

Bilbo's lip trembled. "Don't make fun of me, pleashe. I'm really shcared."

"No, no, I only meant it as a joke. I'm sorry, Bilbo." He pulled Bilbo into a hug.

"It'sh okee." Bilbo layed down and patted the spot again. He gave Bofur big puppy eyes. Bofur couldn't say no to that, so he layed down beside the Hobbit and pulled the covers up. Bilbo snuggled closer to him and sighed happily. He smelled heavily like alcohol. "Bovur?"

"Yes, Bilbo?"

"I lovesh you."

"I love you too." He pulled Bilbo closer and wrapped an arm around his belly. "Goodnight, Bilbo."

"Goodnight, Bovur."


Warm sunlight hit Bilbo's face, and he smiled. But when he opened his eyes, he had to shut them again. He groaned. Waaay too much... Stupid elves and their strong ale.

Bofur came in, holding a tray of vegetables and fruits. And curse their greens, he added silently.

"Mornin', Bilbo!" He said cheerily.

"Could you whisper?" he asked.

"Oh! Yeah, sorry," he said quietly.

"Ugh... How much did I drink last night? And what all did I do?"

"You drank at least five pints of ale. Let me tell you, your speech is hilarious when yer intoxicated. I had ta drag you to bed, and you wouldn't let me leave."

"Well, that's not as terrible as the last time I got drunk. That's an upside, I guess," he murmured.

"Ooh, and what happened last time you got drunk? I'm pretty curious."


He set the tray down. "Ya can't eat till you tell me." He crossed his arms and cocked an eyebrow. "What'd ya do?"


"Yeah, right," Bofur chuckled. He grabbed Bilbo's shoulders and pinned him down to the bed. "What did you do, Bilbo?" he hummed as he kissed Bilbo's neck.

"N-Nothing... Ohhh..." Bilbo moaned.

"Come now, we both know that ain't true." Bofur kissed the tip of Bilbo's ear. He gasped. Bofur pulled Bilbo's hands above his head and held them there.

Bilbo whined. "Oh, B-Bofur... I, uh, it was a long time ago... I, uh, I was with s-some friends, we had had a lot to drink, and we... Ohh... We went b-back to my house, and, uh, we e-ended up... Ohh... We ended up having s-sex..."

"Ooh, sexy little Hobbit, aren't you?" he purred. His breath ghosted across the shell of Bilbo's ear. The halfling shuddered. "By Durin, you are so... SSSensitive," he growled. Bilbo could only moan in response. Bofur ripped the elven tunic Bilbo was wearing in half. He kissed Bilbo's forehead, then his nose, then his chin. He left a trail of kisses down Bilbo's chest and to his nipple. His tongue swirled around the hard nub, and Bilbo jumped under him.

"Uhhhnnn... B-Bofur..."

"Mmm..." He kissed Bilbo across his chest to the other nipple. He sucked and kissed it, letting his teeth graze the skin, and Bilbo gasped and whined. Bofur smirked. "I have you mewling like a kitten now..."

He kissed Bilbo, then went down his belly and stopped just above his trousers.

"What do we have here, Bilbo Baggins?" He nuzzled the bulge in Bilbo's trousers.

"B-Bofur... Pl-Please..." he gasped.

"Do you want me to stop?" he asked. His lips brushed Bilbo's belly, and the Hobbit shivered.

"N-No... Keep going, Bofur... Please..."

Bofur chuckled low in his throat and pulled down the waist of Bilbo's trousers. Bilbo's cock stood erect, the skin glistening with precome. Bofur licked the entire length. He wrapped his mouth around the head and sucked. Bilbo let out a long, loud moan. His back arched and his hand grabbed one of Bofur's braids.

"You are delicious, Bilbo," he murmured. He hummed, and the vibration sent a wave of pleasure throughout Bilbo.

"Ahhh... B-Bofur... I'm so close..." he whined. Bofur gave his cock another suck, which was all Bilbo needed. He cried out in ecstasy as he came in Bofur's mouth. He swallowed every drop.

"Delicious..." he growled as he kissed Bilbo's lips.

"Mmm... You are amazing, Bofur..." Bilbo said breathlessly. That was the best climax he had ever had.

"I'm glad you liked it." He layed down next to him and placed his arm across Bilbo's belly. They slept together through the whole morning.