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Seeing Red

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Emma Swan had a craving. No, she didn't thirst for dark magic or want to steal everyone's happiness—her Dark One days were over once Merlin was reunited with his beloved, the sword and the dagger joined together once more releasing Emma from her cursed darkness. But she still had a yearning. A need that manifested as greed and power took over her all those months, but this was for something much simpler than ultimate power. Emma, former Dark One and once again Sheriff and Saviour had a craving for ice cream. Specifically Ben and Jerry's Rocky Road-ish ice cream. The Ice Queen had a decent replica back when she was running the shop, but nothing could come close to B&J's own specialty. Lucky for her, the grocery store carried it. She wasn't able to pick it up earlier today when she stopped by to grab it because some stray Lost Boy had pilfered money from the register, but Emma was determined to get it now. Forget bowls, she'd be eating it right out of the tub.

She had one destination in mind when she entered the grocery store, nodding quickly to Tom behind the counter as he sniffled and sorted out pill bottles. Now that she thought about it, maybe Sneezy handling everyone's medicine wasn't the best career for the dwarf, but right now, all she wanted was ice cream. She detoured to the freezer section, picking up her pace when Tom spotted her, and tried to duck her head. The Ben and Jerry's tub was right in sight, and it was the last one! Oh yes, come to Mama.

"Sheriff!" Tom moved from around the counter and nearly knocked over the comic book turnstile in his rush to reach her. "Sheriff Swan!"

"I'm off duty, Tom." She may not have been the Dark One anymore, but she damn well remembered how certain members of the populace got a tad bit annoying when they had a hero to revere. "Call David, he's on night shift this week."

"No, I just wanted to thank you." The pharmacist caught up with her right as she got to the freezer section. Her hand gripped the handle and she exhaled through gritted teeth trying to remember the exercises Dr. Hopper taught her. It's okay to be angry, Emma. Just remember that the darkness doesn't consume you anymore. The frosted glass of the freezer teased her with her pint of ice cream, but she could humour him for a minute. She smiled, a little too widely for her taste, but it got the shorter man to back up a step. "Those rotten kids are always stealing things from around here. Achoo! I was wondering—Achoo!—could we enforce a no—Ah—"

Emma magicked a hanky into her hand and offered it to Sneezy before she be covered in anymore snot. He took it, blowing his nose into it loudly. She wrinkled her nose when it didn't seem to stop. Maybe she could quickly swipe the ice cream before he was done. Finally, he sneezed once more into the handkerchief then held the wet cloth out to Emma. "Thanks."

"Keep it," the blonde insisted with a disgusted frown before turning to get her ice cream.

"Wait." He gripped her arm, and Emma could feel how clammy it was from his sneezes. "Could we enforce a no loitering bylaw around here? It'd keep my store a little safer."

"That's something you'd have to take up with the Mayor." She tugged his arm off her sleeve and nodded her head once with finality. "Good night, Tom."

She was about to turn to get her well-deserved ice cream, but the way Tom looked past her and over her shoulder had her whipping around to see none other than the Mayor's retreating form. Emma pointed her thumb over her shoulder, directing the man to Regina. "There's your chance."

With that she clapped him on the back and turned, her palms rubbing together in anticipation of her much needed ice cream. Pulling open the freezer door, Emma was already thinking about popping that bad boy open and digging into it, but when she glanced down to the ice cream shelf, the last pint of Ben and Jerry's Rocky Road-ish was gone. Phish Food. Americone Dream. Half Baked…well maybe she could also get that but no Rocky Road-ish? What the hell?!

"Where is it?" She growled to herself, turning an accusing glare to Tom, but the pharmacist, like the ice cream, was already gone. She found him sheepishly helping Regina at the check-out.

The freezer door nearly cracked from the sheer force of her slamming it shut. There was no way she imagined it being there. It was there, and then Tom, and then—she whipped her head up to see Regina pulling the first item from her basket. A pint of Ben and Jerry's Rocky Road-ish. Goddammit.

"Hey!" She jogged up to the cash right as Tom scanned in her ice cream. "Hey! That's mine."

"What is it, Ms. Swan?"

"You took my ice cream." Emma pointed to the tub. "I wanted that."

Regina took it from Tom, who remained paralyzed like a statue, and analyzed the frozen dessert curiously. "Hmmm, now are you Ben or Jerry?"

"Knock it off, Regina. I really wanted that ice cream."

"And so do I, but it seems I got to it first." She returned it to Tom who continued to look between both women with caution. "Bag it, Mr. Clark."

"Regina." The blonde nearly stomped her foot. "I've been wanting that ice cream all day."

"Get another flavour."

"I want that one. You get another flavour."

"Trust me, Emma. You do not want to get into a petty argument with me this week."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I'll plan it more effectively in the future so it better suits your needs." She stepped closer, nearly nose to nose with the brunette. "You don't even like ice cream, and Henry isn't even home tonight."

"Well I want it tonight."

"Not as much as I do," the blonde argued. "I swear, you only want it because I do."

Regina scoffed. "Because I can read your mind and know when you're grabbing ice cream and purposely got it just to spite you?"

Emma's eye twitched at the absurdity but stayed firm. "Yes."

Rolling her eyes, Regina turned back toward Tom muttering "idiot" under her breath. She glared at the shopkeeper. "Well?"

Tom hastily bagged the ice cream and then moved quickly to scan in an Apollo bar. She wasn't lying when she said Henry wasn't home, the kid was at a sleepover with some Camelot kids, and Regina never fancied chocolate that much. A hot water bottle was the next to go into the bag, and when Tom scanned in the tampons and bagged them, Emma's eyes widened in realization.

"Oh."

Regina cocked an eyebrow as she got out her wallet but ignored the blonde. She paid, took her bag, and nodded curtly to both pharmacist and Sheriff. "Good evening."

Emma debated calling bullshit on the Mayor when she noticed that Regina's gait was slow, calculated, like every step was taken with absolute care so not to put pressure on her abs. Okay, so maybe the former Evil Queen, temporary Saviour, and current Mayor got really bad cramps, but she was still a thief of ice cream.

Emma was in a rut. She really, really wanted that ice cream, but if her detective skills were up to par she could surmise that Regina probably wanted it a lot more than she did. But it was the last one and Regina got an Apollo bar, and that had to count satisfying her chocolate craving. She imagined the Mayor curling on a bed, the hot water bottle pressed against her stomach as she wept over a tub of Ben and Jerry's Rocky Road-ish. Emma had been the Dark One but even for the few months where she possessed unlimited power, the week where she was on her period had her turning people into trees left and right just because they looked at her the wrong way. Imagine the Evil Queen going through her monthly hormonal changes. Emma was lucky to walk away with her hands intact.

Sighing, she turned to the pharmacist, catching him mid-sneeze. She rolled her eyes waiting for him to clear his nose before levelling him with a stare. "Where are your meds?"


Regina was miserable. Her uterus was cramping into knots so tightly that it made her nauseous. She had initially gone to the store because when she attempted to fill her hot water bottle, she discovered a tear right at the back. Henry had sat on it last month, soaking the couch, and Regina had been too preoccupied salvaging the leather to remember to buy another. But her cramps were near unbearable today, yet she forced herself out of bed and to the store in order to procure another one. She got one; along with dark chocolate and a tub of ice cream. Her monthly pain had distracted her enough that when Emma tried to convince Regina she had eyed the ice cream first, Regina hadn't said more than a few quips. Willing the hot water to boil faster, Regina pulled the Ben and Jerry's Rocky Road-ish out of the bag and tore apart the plastic around it.

Elegance was not on her mind at the moment. It wasn't like she had a boyfriend anymore to impress since Robin proved to jump from one woman to another just with a title of "wife." However, she did appreciate that Zelena laughed in his face and sought sole custody of her daughter. Luckily Henry was away as well, though he was used to her eating her weight in ice cream whenever she was cramping and even helped provide her with her hot water bottle on the mornings she couldn't get out of bed.

She opened the lid and pulled a spoon from the drawer, digging into the thick and rich ice cream. Her eyes shut as the frozen treat melted on her tongue. Oh yes. This was exactly what she needed. She took another bite, and then another, before her kettle whistled and she set the ice cream down in order to remove it from the stove. Carefully maneuvering the kettle to the sink where her new hot water bottle sat, she began to pour the liquid in. Sufficiently filled, she capped it and set it against her stomach, the heat already making her insides relax. A few hours of this, her ice cream, and her medical dramas and she should be fine come morning.

Sighing, she held the bottle closer and turned with the intention of grabbing the tub of ice cream and heading directly for the couch, but she paused when the scent of cinnamon and oak filled the kitchen. Emma. The blonde's magic scent had changed ever since her Dark One days, and in a puff of silver smoke sitting right beside her ice cream was a bottle of Midol. She quirked an eyebrow up and inspected the medicine, finding a sticky note attached to it.

This always helps me —ES

A soft smile graced Regina's face as she took the new bottle of Midol and popped open the safety cap, dry swallowing two pills. Always the Saviour.


Emma was still pretty cranky not having her ice cream, but she swung by Granny's and picked up an order of onion rings and grilled cheese. She was already finishing off her sandwich and starting on her rings when lavender and apple scent filled her kitchen. Beside her onion rings was a large bowl of Ben and Jerry's Rocky Road-ish, whipped cream liberally sprayed on it and a cherry on top. Emma recognized the sticky note on the bowl as the one she wrote herself just a few minutes ago, but Regina's elegant scrawl was etched underneath her message.

Thank you —RM

P.S. You may have more if you wish to join me in watching Grey's

Emma grinned. Ice cream, Grey's and Regina? That was better than her lonely dinner in her big house. She replaced the bag of rings into Granny's takeout bag and scooped up the bowl of ice cream, disappearing to Mifflin in a cloud of silver smoke.