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From Conception to Birth

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Vince looked at the purple bottle carefully. He had had close encounters with Naboo's stash of potions before and didn't want all his hair falling out or to turn into a pixie or something. Though with the right accessories, that could be genius....

There weren't any little skulls or any angry looking pieces of red text on the label, which he took as a good sign. 'Freya's Mead: To restore potency' it read, simply. That looked straightforward enough. Not that he had any problems in the potency department, he just needed something to give him a little extra oomph. He shrugged and then necked the whole bottle. It tasted slightly of honey and burned his throat.

Belatedly, he noticed a small symbol on the corner of the label. It looked slightly like a cross with a bobble head. Oh well, what was the worst thing that could happen?

Vince felt warm and fidgety and there was a strange pulling twinge in his tummy. He walked into Howard's room and saw him reading some boring magazine about jazz, or something similarly dull. It wasn't even glossy!

The look of quiet concentration on the other man's face was making Vince's insides squirm.

"Howard," he said in a low husky voice as he walked over to the bed and plucked the magazine out of his hands.

"What do you want, Vince?" Howard asked before Vince's hands grabbed his shirt and pulled him forward.

"Vince?" he asked uncertainly, "You look a bit... odd. Do you want me to get Naboo?"

Vince growled and jumped on top of him, straddling his legs.

"Vince?" Howard said in a small voice as he stared into the dilated pupils of his best friend.

Vince started to lean further and further forward, while Howard retreated by leaning back, until they were laying down and Vince's hair was hanging around their faces in a loose curtain.

"I need you, Howard," Vince said and lunged forward, closing the gap between them.

Howard squeaked indignantly and tried to gently push him off. Vince retaliated by reaching between them and stroking Howard's cock into life through the front of his trousers.

"Now see here, Vince," Howard said against Vince's lips, "You can't just come into someone's bedroom, jump on top of them and touch them on the penis."

Vince pulled back and kissed his nose.

"Don't you like it?" he asked, "Come on, Howard. Everyone knows you fancy me. Enjoy yourself for once."

"This is all a bit sudden, can't we just go for a meal and see how things go from there?" Howard protested weakly as Vince pressed several gentle kisses against his lips in quick succession.

"Kiss me, Howard," Vince breathed against his mouth and Howard felt himself surrender.


Vince carefully lowered himself down onto Howard's cock slowly, guiding the head into his lube-slicked opening. Howard's mouth formed a silent "oh" as the length of him disappeared inside Vince. Vince started to rock his hips forward but Howard grabbed him tightly and held him still.

"Wait, just a second, while I get used to it," he said through gritted teeth.

Slowly he began to move into the tight heat. He wrapped a large hand around Vince's bobbing erection and rubbed it, while Vince mewed softly. They moved together, slowly at first and then gaining more speed as Howard became more confident. He flipped Vince onto his back and pushed into him hard, slamming the bed forward a few inches. Vince wrapped his legs around his hips and held him tight as they rutted like monkeys.

"Howard, I- I love you," Vince gasped.

Howard's thrusting stuttered and he looked down in shock. Laying beneath him with his cock in hand and looking throughly fucked, Vince was still the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

"You shouldn't say things like that, if you don't mean them," he said cautiously.

Vince frowned and thumped his shoulder.

"You bastard, I finally say it first and you tell me I don't mean it," he said angrily, before Howard's lips sealed over his again.

Howard's hands held his face gently as he pounded into him and he whispered sweetly into his ear while they came together. They lay together, sticky and sated, slowly stroking each other's sweaty skin and kissing sleepily.

"What was all that about?" Howard's voice rumbled in his ear as Vince lay his head on his chest.

"I really like you a lot, Howard," he said kissing an adjacent nipple, "and I wanted to."

"Where does this leave us, exactly?" Howard asked.

"Do you want to be my boyfriend? Or lover, or partner, or bum-chum, or whatever you want to call it," Vince said.

"I love you, Vince. I always have," Howard said quietly.

"I know, Howard. And I love you," Vince sighed happily and closed his eyes.


Naboo looked at the empty bottle that had contained the fertility potion.

"Oh bollocks."