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Couple Quarrels

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"Would you shut up?"

 

"No, you shut up."

 

"I'll shut up when you shut up!"

 

"Well, I'll shut up when you shut up, so you should shut up first!"

 

The werewolves glanced around, uncomfortable and unsure of what to do. Typically when Shadowhunters step in to break up a fight amongst the pack, they don't start fighting with each other instead. It was clear they were close, close enough to have a lover's spat anyway. What Ginny didn't understand is why they had to do it here and now. Honestly, she wasn't even sure what they were fighting about.

 

The blondie, who the other guy called Jay, is yelling about how the other guy, Alan, always takes all the credit for everything, and that Alan should let him "have some fun for once in his life", to which Alan says Jay had spent his whole life in the spotlight while Alan had gotten nothing, and what was Jay talking about he let him have plenty of fun, and can they talk about this later because this was getting ridiculous (Ginny liked this guy), to which Jay vehemently says that no, they cannot talk about this later (Ginny did not like this guy) because he wants to talk about it now, so he could go home and cry into a bucket of ice cream because his "parabatai/the love of his life/the other half of his soul" (that sounds fake but okay) didn't love him anymore, to which Alan yells, "So that's where my ice cream keeps going!"

 

And it just goes downhill from there.

 

"It's not your ice cream, it's our ice cream!"

 

"No, I paid for it, that makes it mine!"

 

"You pay for everything!"

 

"So what you're saying is you actually don't own anything?"

 

"I thought we shared everything!"

 

"Not ice cream!"

 

Ginny figures this would be a good time to sneak away quietly. Her fellow pack mates apparently have the same idea, and they all start to slowly back away. Unfortunately, the Shadowhunters have better reflexes than she'd anticipated. Jay pulls a knife from his belt and throws it at her, spearing her shirt just above her shoulder and the force knocks her over, the knife sticking in the ground and pinning her down, and Jay is still yelling. Only now it's about who gets which side of the bed. Jay says that Alan always moves around and Alan says that Jay always kicks him off in his sleep. Ginny's starting to get a headache. So she goes for the last resort.

 

She glares at both of them from the ground, sniffs, thinks of dead puppies, and bursts into tears.

 

Both Shadowhunters stop, staring at her in shock and mild horror. Alan rubs the back of his neck, looking embarrassed.

 

"Alan," Jay hisses out of the corner of his mouth, apparently forgetting that werewolves have super hearing. "Fix her."

 

"You broke her," Alan hisses back. "You fix her."

 

Jay winces. "Um. Sorry?"

 

Alan smacks the back of Jay's head. "He's sorry. He really is. Just...don't get violent anymore, okay? At least not in public, where you can get reported." He grabs Jay's arm and drags him off, Jay complaining the whole way about police brutality, and Alan snapping that "we aren't police, so shut up".

 

The werewolves stare after them. Ginny blinks back fake tears. "What the heck was that?"