When Yuu agreed to help Shinoa find a birthday present for Mitsuba, this was not what he thought he was agreeing to. Her hand dragging him down the sidewalk by the wrist toward a nondescript little store with blacked out windows, laughing all the way.
“Are you sure they’re open?” He asked, as he stumbled behind her toward the entrance, “It seems kind of dark.”
Shinoa’s smile grew as she pulled the door open, “oblivious as always,” she giggled.
As he walked in behind her, or rather, was forcibly pulled, he quickly realized just what kind of store they were in. Yuu was, indeed, oblivious, but not a complete idiot. Once he was inside there was no mistaking it. Sex toys lined the walls and covered the various display areas on the store floor. It was a collection so vast that Yuu thought that if he took the time to inspect it all he’d find that at least half were items he hadn’t even heard of, but there was no way he could tell at this point. He was too busy curling in on himself, his face so red that the casual observer might think he needed medical attention.
Perhaps they were right, Yuu was sure he was dying. His mind zeroed in on two feelings that mixed together in such a way that his thoughts were very nearly incoherent. The first one being the absolute mortification he was experiencing while he stood completely still, hoping that maybe if he shut his eyes tight enough the entire store would somehow go away as though it’s very existence was a personal problem he needed to escape. The second one was his complete and utter feeling of regret toward his entire friendship with Shinoa, down to the very act of acknowledging her existence. After all, she was the reason he was currently in this position, wishing he could teleport to literally any place but this one. Anywhere but the goddamn sex shop in which he now stood.
Well, isn’t that just fucking wonderful.
He could distantly hear the sound of Shinoa laughing, and was only pulled away from his thoughts when a second voice entered the mix.
“Can I help you find any-” the distinctly male voice started, but didn’t finish.
“Yuu, I feel like a kid in candy store,” she proclaimed, twirling around the various displays, “it’s like Willie Wonka’s Sex Factory.”
“I’m going to kill you,” he replied, with a tight smile and a face that was still beet-red, not a shade lighter.
“Sir, can I help you find anything?” The other voice asked again, and it was then that Yuu finally looked toward the source of that voice. He really, really wished he hadn’t.
If Yuu felt speechless before, he wasn’t sure what to call what he was now. The man had pale, clear skin and messy blonde hair that somehow managed to still look soft despite it’s unkempt state. His cheekbones were high, his lips full and to top it all off he had the clearest blue eyes Yuu had ever seen. The feeling of having those eyes on him sent shockwaves through him, and Yuu was certain his blush had somehow intensified further. Yuu continued staring at this man, who looked to be around his age, but just a little bit taller. He wore dark jeans and oxfords, and stretching across his broad shoulders was was appeared to be a band t-shirt, although not a band Yuu had heard of. Pinned to said shirt there was a name tag which read, “Mikaela.” Yuu stared at the stranger, and gradually came to the uncomfortable realization that this was probably the most attractive person he had ever met. And he was meeting them in a sex shop.
Yuu wasn’t sure how long he’d been staring, but the man smirked and restated his question, effectively breaking Yuu out of his trance.
“Do you need help finding anything?”
Yuu’s eyes briefly met the other man’s before he quickly averted them.
“Uhh,” he began, oh-so-intelligently, “no, she’s just…” his gaze moved over to where Shinoa was whimsically browsing one of the displays.
“She your girlfriend?” The man, Mikaela, asked, nodding his head in Shinoa’s direction to indicate the bizarre, lavender-haired girl.
“N-no!” Yuu clarified quickly, “Jesus. No way.” He nervously fidgeted with the hem of his shirt while Mikaela quietly hummed in confirmation. Yuu tried his very best to calm down, and for a moment he thought the redness in his face was beginning to fade, if only slightly, when-
“Cherry boy!” Oh hey, it returned full-force. Great, “do you think Mitsu would like these nipple clamps?” She held up a plastic package that couldn’t be seen very well from where Yuu was standing. He didn’t need to see it.
“I-I don’t know!” He shouted, his voice raising an octave, “Jesus Christ, leave me alone.”
“This is no place to be talking about Jesus, cherry boy,” Shinoa grinned and waved her finger, before she continued her search, humming miscellaneous showtunes. Yuu heard Mikaela laugh softly at their exchange, and he thought to himself that it was a beautiful sound. He just wished he could’ve heard it in a different context. He looked over to see him leaning casually against the counter.
“You seem uncomfortable,” he commented with a smile.
“I’m not, I’m fine!” Yuu quickly jumped to his defense.
“It’s okay, most people feel awkward to some degree when they’re in here. That’s why most of our customers order online.”
“Online?” Yuu looked back towards Shinoa and rose his voice, “Shinoa, did you know there’s an online store?”
“Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t,” she sung. “Maybe I just wanted to see the dildos in person. You know, feel them.”
Yuu swore under his breath and heard Mikaela laughing a bit louder from beside him.
“Most people don’t have that level of enthusiasm,” the smile could be heard plainly in Mikaela’s voice, “I’ve worked here for about a year and a half, never thought I’d see anything new, but there it is.”
“Everything about Shinoa’s personality was new to me,” Yuu replied, “and not in a good way.”
“You certainly keep interesting company.”
“Sh-she’s not my girlfriend!” Yuu protested once more. It occurred to him that this probably wasn’t what Mikaela was implying, but the words left his mouth before he could stop them.
“Yuu!” His head snapped over to see Shinoa placing her hand over her heart dramatically, “that’s such a cruel way to break up with someone. How could you?!”
“Shinoa, you are a homosexual woman,” Yuu deadpanned.
“Hmm, you got me there. Speaking of which, here,” she threw some item at Yuu, which he, curse his sharp reflexes, caught before he realized what it was. “Consider that a gift, for coming out here to help little old me.”
“What the-” Yuu looked to his right hand, and upon realizing it was wrapped around a vibrator, lost all of his remaining sanity. Mikaela just stood there, leaning against the counter as he was before, holding his hand over his mouth like he was trying to contain his laughter, but his shoulders shook with it anyway. Yuu immediately threw the toy back at Shinoa, who caught it effortlessly.
“I don’t want a f-fucking-” Yuu stopped himself, finding it pitifully difficult for him just to say the word.
“My, my. You’re even more of a cherry boy than I thought,” Shinoa giggled, before holding up the object now in her hand, “do you need me to explain to you what this is?”
“I know what it is. I don’t want it.”
“Well, you can’t stop me getting it for you.”
“You’re wasting your money, I’m not gonna use it!” Yuu’s pitch heightened. He internally wondered how, and more importantly why, this shopping trip had suddenly become about him.
“Oh, somehow I doubt that.” Yuu clenched his fists at his sides, uncomfortably aware of how throughout this whole… incident, Mikaela had been looking at him with something akin to curiosity.
“For fucks sake, are you done?” He asked in exasperation.
“So impatient,” she remarked, “almost, having some trouble deciding, but I’ll let you know.”
Yuu shut his eyes and released a deep sigh, before looking nervously back toward Mikaela, who looked nothing short of completely entertained.
“Are you going to help her?”
“Hmm?” Mikaela mumbled, “Oh, I think she’s doing fine. And anyway, as weird as this probably sounds, I feel like you need me more than she does.” This response had Yuu taken aback. He wanted to give him some witty, sarcastic reply, but under the circumstances was forced to recognize that he was incapable of thinking of one.
“I… I see,” He murmured, looking everywhere but Mikaela, and soon realizing that looking at the sex toys surrounding them was almost as awkward as looking into Mikaela’s eyes. He redirected his gaze to his feet. “Thanks, uhh…”
“Call me Mika.”
“Oh, uhm, Mika. Okay. Thanks, I guess…” Yuu trailed off, his thoughts at war between wanting desperately to get out of the conversation and hoping it would never end. Maybe I should ask him out, or something… he thought, before releasing a small, bitter laugh at the ridiculousness of the idea. Here? In a sex shop? No fucking way.
A moment later Shinoa skipped back over to Yuu’s side, holding that goddamn vibrating dildo, the nipple clamps from earlier (in a different color, chartreuse), a pair of fuzzy handcuffs, and some other bizarre contraption, which Yuu couldn’t for the life of him figure out what it was, but it had an “on” switch.
“Oh! Almost forgot something,” she exclaimed, before running back to one of the shelves and retrieving a small item. She returned and held it up for Yuu to see, “consider this part of the gift I already gave you.” Yuu glanced at it, it was a bottle of something, a bottle of… oh, for fuck’s sake.
“Cherry lube for the cherry boy, get it?” She smiled evilly. Yuu stared at her, his left eye twitching. He wasn’t sure how much more of this he could take. And of course, Mika, that bastard… that beautiful bastard, was laughing, hiding behind his hand in vain. For once, Yuu found it in him to form a coherent response.
“Call me that one more time, and I will sneak into your dorm room at night, steal all your Easy-Mac, and then I’ll go to the corner store and buy all their fucking Easy-Mac and you will fucking starve, Shinoa.”
Shinoa blinked at him, with an odd expression on her face, like she wasn’t sure whether she should laugh or feel genuinely scared.
“Alright,” she held her hands up in surrender, despite the fact that they were still holding all the sex toys, “whatever, Yuu-san. I’ll back off, for now.”
Yuu didn’t respond, just ran his fingers through his hair in exasperation, listening to the sound of Mika ringing up her items. She payed, and Yuu looked over in time to see Mika smile and say, “have fun.”
“Oh, he will,” Shinoa smirked, trying to hand her “gifts” to Yuu without looking. Yuu made eye contact with Mika one last time, as he walked backwards into the door and pushed it open with his back. It slammed behind him, or rather, in front of him, and Shinoa emerged a moment later. Yuu had some choice words for her, but before he could get even one out, she spoke up.
“Oh my god, you have it so bad for that guy.”
“I do not!” he said quickly, before making a sharp turn and fast-walking down the sidewalk, with Shinoa catching up to him a second later.
“You totally do, oh shit,” She swung the paper bag back and forth, grinning like the cheshire cat, “What are you gonna do about it? Are you going to ask him out? Oh my god, you’re gonna ask out a guy that works at a--”
“No!” he yelled, becoming flustered and stuttering, “I-I mean, I don’t know? It’s none of your business anyway!”
“Oh, it is so my business, Yuu-san,” she replied, the spring in her step more pronounced than usual. “Oh shit, is this guy gonna be your prince, or something, princess?”
“Or maybe he’ll be your knight, holy shit, your knight in shining armor!”
“So like, would his sword be like a really long dildo, or just his di--”
“Stop.” Yuu’s eyes were saucers, he could feel actual beads of sweat on his temple, “Will you just leave it alone, Shinoa? Is it not already obvious that I do not want to talk about this?”
Shinoa looked up in thought, but her persisting smile revealed that, no, she is not going to leave this one alone.
“Okay but like seriously though,” she started, a little less hyper, “How are you going to ask this guy out? I mean, you only know him from the sex shop.”
“Don’t say--” Yuu reacted instinctively.
“God, you really have no chill.”
“Look who’s talking!” Yuu threw his hands up, exasperated, and began walking faster.
“I just want to help!” Shinoa kept his pace, “I’m serious, Yuu-san, people probably ask him out all the time at work, like they think he’s DTF because he works there or something.”
“DTF?” Yuu looked at her with a perplexed expression.
“Ah, yes, almost forgot who I was talking to,” Shinoa replied, “DTF stands for Down To Fuck.”
“Jesus Christ,” He winced.
“Why do you have to be so weird about stuff like that?” Shinoa emphasized with a light hit to his leg with the bag.
“This is a weird situation, Shinoa!” He flustered, “under any normal circumstance I would be fine with talking about sex, but no! I am dragged into an adult toy store by my overly eccentric friend, and when I think things can’t get worse, I meet basically the most attractive guy I have ever spoken to. How do you think I should fucking react?!”
Shinoa remained quiet for a moment, just staring at Yuu, before she responded.
“Damn, you’re so screwed, Yuu-san,” She giggled slightly at his outburst. “Well, I mean, not yet. I certainly hope you will be.”
“Okay!” Yuu said in mock-excitement, throwing his hands up as if to say,I’m so fucking done with this, as they approached the point at which both would part ways to their respective dorms. “What a shame, guess this conversation’s over!”
“Oh, it’s not over,” she replied, carefully slipping her “gifts” into his backpack, as surreptitiously as possible.
Yuu just glared and began walking in the direction of his dorm, not bothering to say goodbye, or even acknowledge Shinoa if she did. The walk from there was relatively short, but he payed little attention to it. His mind was still a jumble of indecipherable thoughts, and when he finally reached his dorm he simply threw down his bag and collapsed on his bed, falling asleep fully dressed.
In the morning, he was awoken by the sound of his phone’s text alert. He picked it up sluggishly and unlocked it.
Shinoa Hiiragi 7:43 AM:
Good news, cherry boy! Mitsu wasn’t too into the handcuffs, guess I’m gonna have to return them ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)