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Greetings from Kalakiki

Work Text:

[Image shows two sides of a postcard. The top half shows the front: a massive, futuristic hall, light streaming in from the far end, through which can be seen a city made up of bubble-like developments. Some are on stalks and in some trees or bushes can be seen. The hall is made up of large purple arches with roundels. Small figures can be seen all the way through. (Source for this image.) In the bottom right corner, in brush-type writing, are the words “Greetings from Kalakiki!”. The back image is the text of the postcard, in different handwriting to represent Amy, Rory and the Doctor.]

Transcript of the text:

Left hand side:

Rory: Dear Amy and Katy

Rory: Congratulations on your wedding! Very sorry we couldn't be there; we were on our way, but then the the Doctor suggested we stop off at Kalakiki to pick up a wedding present. “Lovely peaceful planet,” he said, “almost entirely populated with artisanal craftsbeings.” Well, long story short, slight overshoot timewise, oppressive governmental regime, encouraged a revolution, got locked up in yet another filthy dungeon. You know how it is. Anyway, Amy managed to pinch this postcard from the gift shop as we were running for our lives, and the Doctor had a pen in his pocket (it lights up when you write with it, he told me to make sure I mentioned that (and to be fair it's quite dark in here so it IS helpful)), so here we are. The Doctor has promised to post this next time he's in the right place, though I wouldn't be surprised if you get it ten years too late. Or too early, in which case... surprise?

The Doctor: That's terribly unfair, Rory, I almost always land exactly where and when I mean to nowadays.

Rory: Like... this time, for instance? Or when you gave us a lift to the shops and when we got home it was three months later and the front door wouldn't open because of the post piled up behind it?

The Doctor: Those were just isolated incidents! And it's always nice to get home and find a lot of post waiting for you, isn't it?

Rory: Not when it's telling you the electricity's been cut off!

Amy: Oi, would you two mind bickering a bit more quietly? I'm trying to concentrate on picking the lock here!
Rory: Sorry Amy.
The Doctor: Yeah, sorry. :(

Amy: That's better. Now, if I just do THIS... and THIS... and AHA. Come on boys, time to go. We've got a government to overthrow.


Right hand side:

The Doctor, over the box for the stamp: Stamps! I love stamps. Don't have any though, sorry.

Amy: Amy and Katy
The Solar System,
The Milky Way,
The Universe

Rory: Sometime in the early twenty first century please

The Doctor: Hey!

Amy: Maybe we should just get River to deliver it.

Rory: Good idea.

The Doctor: I resent this.

All three have signed the postcard, but the Doctor has crossed out “Williams” in Rory's name and corrected it to Pond, and signed himself “Doctor Pond” (with lots of kisses).