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Colin was finally, blessedly, done with the day’s signing. His arm killed and he couldn’t wait for a shower and a bucket of ice. A young woman thrust her hand out in front of him, offering up a jar of Skippy, and he stopped moving towards the exit and grinned, holding out his bag for her to drop it in.

“You’re never going to run out of that slop, are you?” Katie hissed through her smile.

“I love this slop,” he said, and they were ushered off again.


Colin hardly had enough time to pee before there was a knock at his hotel room door. He opened it to find Katie decked out in swimwear, a smile on her face.

“Erm, yes?”

“Angel’s got a headache and is taking a nap. That means you’ve got to come with me to the pool.”

“I have a headache, too,” he said without any real hope.

“You’ve got two minutes. Move your arse.”


Colin didn’t fully understand why Katie liked going to the pool so much. She never got in the water, just dipped her feet in every so often, and both of them had to slather in eighteen layers of sunblock and still hide under a parasol. He figured it was a girl thing, something about having the perfect bikini. And being honest, Katie did look spectacular. So perhaps it was vanity. Or maybe she just liked being around people. She was particularly outgoing, where Colin often felt uncomfortable in large groups of people.

In any case, he stayed with her down by the pool for about twenty minutes before crying sunburn, and she was happy to let him go, engrossed in some trashy-looking novel he didn’t dare ask about.

The truth was, he’d been itching to call Bradley all day. It was weird not having him around at an event like this. He felt selfish for wanting Bradley there to deflect inappropriate questions and make totally inane questions inappropriate when Bradley was the one who was missing out. Colin did what he could to make Bradley feel included, going so far as to record the panel to show him later, but it all felt insufficient. They’d gotten to to sit in the Batmobile for fuck’s sake.


Colin showered quickly, wanting to call Bradley before it was obscenely late in Cardiff. When he got out, it was already past midnight Bradley’s time, so he didn’t even bother getting dressed, just plopped into bed naked and grabbed his phone, sticking in his headphones.

It rang four times before Bradley answered, his voice a bit thick.

“Am I waking you up?” Colin asked, knowing the answer but figuring it would be polite to ask anyway.

“Yep,” Bradley said. “How’s life in sunny California?”

“Sunny,” Colin said. “My wrist hurts like hell from signing.”

Bradley chuckled and asked, “Yeah? How’d the panel go?”

“Fine, fine. Usual stuff. People want the magic reveal. Blah, blah. I recorded it for you,” Colin said, then considered that that might have been a little weird. Bradley didn’t speak right away, so Colin continued. “Actually, during the panel, this couple dressed up as Merlin and Arthur kissed.”

“Really?” Bradley perked up at that, sounding genuinely interested.

“Yeah, and I just happened to have the camera pointed right at them at the time, so. That’ll be a laugh later.”

“Was it hot?” Bradley asked, and Colin could swear he heard an eyebrow waggle through the phone.

“You’re insane.”

“I bet it was hot.”

“Yes, I was feverish with lust,” Colin deadpanned, rolling his eyes.

“Give you a stiffy under the conference table, did it?”

“Shut up, weirdo,” Colin said, resolutely ignoring his penis.

“Get you all riled up while the cameras were on you, did it?” Bradley had that excitement in his voice he only ever got when he knew he was getting under Colin’s skin.

“Oh, yeah. Almost had a wank under the table.”

“Almost, but not quite? Still waiting, huh?”

Colin felt his face burning, because it had been a long time, and just hearing about wanking had his cock interested.

“Go on, then. Give it a pat.”

“Jesus, Bradley. A little obsessed with my prick today, aren’t you?”

“Don’t change the subject.”

“I’m not wanking with you on the phone no matter how much you beg me.”

Colin thought that would shut him up. He looked down and grimaced at his cock resting stupid and hard against his belly.

“Colin, what does your dick look like?”


“God, you are so easy,” Bradley laughed. “Wish I could see the look on your face right now.”

“I’ll take a picture for you.”

“Yes, please.”

“Anyway,” Colin said, hoping to redirect conversation away from his penis as he pressed his palm to it, trying to make it calm down. “How’s filming?”

“Oh, blah, blah, filming is fine. Everything is lovely.”

“Testy,” Colin said, fingers running lazily up and down the length of his cock despite himself.

“Well, you did wake me up.”

Colin couldn’t argue with that, so he stayed silent. Bradley didn’t speak, either.

The thick silence in his ears lulled Colin into an easy comfort. He felt good with Bradley around, even if he had fallen asleep on the other end of the line. It took a bit for his mind to catch up with his hand slowly pumping his prick. When he looked down to watch his hand move over his erection, he was too slow to stop the soft moan that escaped him.

He jolted at the sound, but Bradley seemed not to notice, so he relaxed again, licking along his palm and then wrapping his hand more firmly around his cock.

The first rough jerk at the tip surprised a harsh groan out of him.


Colin froze.

“Er, yeah?” he said, fear and shame coursing through him, his hand utterly still on his prick, his own heartbeat thudding in his ears.

“Fuck, Colin, are you wanking?”

“Er, no,” Colin said, and apparently he was a terrible actor when aroused, because that couldn’t have sounded more like a lie.

“Jesus, you are, aren’t you?” Bradley didn’t sound disgusted or even amused. He sounded more ... intrigued.

Colin decided to take a chance on honesty.

“Shit, I’m sorry. It’s been a stupidly long weekend, and I thought you’d fallen asleep.” It was a lousy excuse, but it was the truth.

“I thought your wrist hurt,” Bradley said, a bit breathless.

“Yeah, I wank lefty,” Colin laughed, because why not tell Bradley?

”Shit,” Bradley whispered.

“Well, I guess I’ve got to finish what I started, so I’ll just hope you forget about this by morning and talk to you soon, okay?” Colin said.

“Wait,” Bradley nearly shouted. “Wait. Stay on the phone.”

“Er...” was all Colin could get out.

“No, I mean,” Bradley started. “I mean, I can help.”

Colin thought Bradley must be having him on, but he didn’t sound like he was joking, so he decided to see how far this would go.


“Okay, er. You just lie back and let me do the talking, okay?”

“Do you know what you’re doing?” Colin laughed, because this was ridiculous and because he was feeling just a little bit hysterical.

Bradley scoffed. “I’ll have you know I’m very sexy when I want to be.”

“All right, all right,” Colin said. “Stun me with your dirty talk.”

Bradley chuckled low in a way Colin had never heard, and fuck, even that made his cock throb. He was getting himself into something very stupid.

“Are you touching your dick?” Bradley asked.

“Yes,” Colin whispered, resting his hand on the underside of his penis.

“Good. I want you to touch it the way you like it. Stroke it long, squeeze the head, maybe pinch your foreskin—you do have foreskin, right?”

“Yes,” Colin sighed.

“Good. Do you have any lube?”


“Spit in your hand, then. Make it good and wet.”

Colin complied, wrapping his prick with a spit-slick hand.

“Close your eyes and feel what you do to yourself. Run your hand along your dick and feel it. Does it feel good?”

“Yes,” Colin whispered.

“Don’t be quiet,” Bradley said, his voice a low rumble that was doing sinful things to Colin’s composure. “Let me hear you.”

Colin let out the breath he’d been holding, sighing the pleasure of his hand on his cock.

“You sound so sexy when you don’t hold it in,” Bradley said. “Start slow. Take long strokes. Tease yourself. Do you ever play with your arse?”

“No,” Colin said, which wasn’t expressly true; he’d tried it a few times but always felt weird about it. He’d also never imagined he’d be having phone sex with his male costar, so.

“Put your right forefinger in your mouth and just suck on it for a while. Feel your mouth like it’s somebody else’s. Curl your tongue around your finger like it’s not your own. Run your finger along your lips. Now press it back inside. Are you doing it?”

“Mm-hmm,” Colin hummed around his finger, and it came out more as a moan.

“Fuck, yes,” Bradley hissed. “I can imagine your fucking gorgeous pink lips wrapped around that long finger like it’s a thick cock. Did you know your lips were fucking made to suck dick?”

“Mm-mm,” Colin moaned, and his cock jerked hard at the image that surfaced in his mind of his own lips wrapped around a prick—around Bradley’s prick.

“They were,” Bradley said, a hitch in his voice. “Fuck, your mouth was made for cock.”

Colin let out a loud groan, because fuck, Bradley was making him feel things, and he wasn’t even stroking himself, just had his hand resting on his cock.

“Spread your legs and bend your knees. Use your left hand to hold your balls. Are you doing it?”

“Yes,” Colin chuckled. “‘Balls’ is not a sexy word.”

“I know,” Bradley laughed. “Shut up. Cup your testicles and hold them up against your cock. Now take that wet finger out of your dirty cock-sucking mouth and put it between your legs.”

“Jesus, you’re filthy.”

“You love it. Now take just the tip of your finger and circle your hole,” Bradley paused. “Does that feel good?”

“Yes,” Colin said, pressing the tip of his finger against his arsehole. It felt better than he remembered, but perhaps that had something to do with Bradley’s husky voice. “Are you touching yourself?”

“Should I be?” Bradley sounded careful, which made Colin’s chest surge with a kind of adoration.

“Yes, you should,” Colin said.

“What should I do?”

“I’m bad at this,” Colin admitted. “I just want to know you’re getting off on this too.”

“Fuck, yes, I am, Colin, Jesus,” Bradley hissed, and the sound of his name in Bradley’s mouth had never been better.

“Yeah, say my name more, Bradley,” Colin said, pressing the tip of his finger just slightly inside himself and choking out a moan.

“You like it when I say your name, Colin? You like how I’m touching my cock thinking about you, Colin?”

“God, fuck, yes, Bradley. Fuck, tell me what you’re thinking of.”

“Do you really want to know?” Bradley sounded like he was on some kind of precipice, his voice threadbare.

“Please, Bradley. Fuck, please, yes, tell me,” Colin begged, squeezing his cock as he spit on his right hand, getting more slickness to push his finger farther in.

“Fuck, Colin, I’m imagining those big, soft lips wrapped around my dick. Would you like that?”

Colin moaned.

“The feel of your hot mouth, that tongue on me. Fuck, Colin, you do things to me. All the time. I wank to you all the time wishing I had your cock in my mouth. Fuck, I want to taste you. I bet you taste so fucking good. Is your cock leaking?”

Colin felt like he couldn’t breathe, one finger curling into his hole and Bradley’s voice filling him with fantasies he’d been too stupid to think of alone. He ran his left hand along the tip of his cock, feeling the wetness there.

“Yes, my prick is wet for you,” Colin said, feeling slightly embarrassed but too turned on to care.

“Taste it for me,” Bradley hissed.

“Jesus, fuck,” Colin moaned, sucking his finger into his mouth.

“How do you taste, darling?”

“So fucking good, Bradley. So good.” Colin lapped at his finger as if it were Bradley’s dick. He swallowed his shame and said, “Want to suck your cock so bad. Want to taste you.”

“Fuck, yes. Fuck, I am so hard for you. Wish you were here to bring me off, suck me ‘til I spill all over your lips.”

“Fuck!” Colin groaned. “Gonna make me come just from your voice.”

“Are you still touching your hole?”

“Yes,” Colin said, face hot. “I have one finger inside. I want more, but no lube.”

“You may not have lube, but I do,” Bradley said, “and I’ve got three fingers pumping into my arse. Would you like to shove your cock inside me?”

Colin felt like he’d been kicked in the gut, the wave of arousal hitting him was so strong. The thought of pushing his prick into Bradley’s arse and fucking into him made Colin wrap his hand around his cock and tug. “Jesus, yes. Yes, I want to fuck you.”

“I’m stretched and wet and waiting. Just need your cock to fuck me, fill me up, make me fucking beg. You want that?”

“Yes, so bad,” Colin whined. “Fuck, I want to fill you with my cock.”

“You’re so fucking hot, Colin. Fuck, you’re sexy. Want to run my tongue over every fucking inch of you, lick you open and fuck you raw. Would you like that?”

“Yes,” Colin hissed, pumping his dick hard and curling the finger in his arse.

“Colin, I’m gonna come, and when I do, I’ll be thinking of you. Does that turn you on?”

“Yes, so fucking much,” Colin panted, feeling himself hurtling towards his orgasm. “Gonna come for you, Bradley. Only thinking of you, only want you.”

“Yes, come on, Colin. I want to hear you come with my name on your lips. I want you to fucking scream for me. I want your neighbours to know who’s fucking you.”

Colin tugged on his prick, imagining Bradley’s hand on him, Bradley leaning over him, shooting semen all across his belly. The only sound on the other end of the line was Bradley’s panting moans.

“Fuck, I’m gonna come, Bradley. You want it?”

“Yes, come on. Come on, love. Come for me, Colin. Fuck, Colin.” Bradley’s voice broke over a moan, and then he let out a long, “Fuck!” followed by a series of deep groans, and Colin could hear every wave of pleasure in Bradley’s orgasm.

Colin gave his cock one last tug, imagining Bradley was rubbing semen against his chin, and then his prick was spurting all over his chest and abdomen as Bradley was saying, “That’s right, Colin. Give me that come.”

Colin shouted his orgasm, littering it with curses and Bradley’s name, as ordered. It felt so fucking natural to give this to him. Bradley saw him through it, whispering things like so good and fuck, you’re perfect.

They were both silent for a spell, catching their breath. Colin dragged his fingers through the streaks of semen on his chest, pretending it was Bradley’s come instead.

Once he had fully come down from his orgasm, the silence felt suffocating, foreboding.

“So I’ll see you in a few days, I guess,” Colin spoke first, uncertain of where they stood after getting off together on the phone, of all things.

“Fuck, yes, you will,” Bradley said, his voice full of promise, before hanging up.

Well, then, Colin thought with a grin before falling into a restful sleep.