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It (Lies) In the Heart

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It's a different kind of world when love is something that can no longer be hidden. It's a different kind of world when everybody believes in soulmates. Or something like that.

Except Yoongi considers the soulmate heart technology the worst invention of the millenium. Every child is implanted with the newest version of the “CardiSoul”, CS for short, right after they are born—a device that glows when you meet or find your so-called “soulmate”. Despite the inventor earning a Nobel Peace Prize, and many other awards, he feels it rather seems...useless.

The purpose of the device was to make it easier for people to find love. In conclusion, would increase people's outlook on life, to be more active and involved and make the world a better place. It worked, Yoongi admits, although he had been born way after the beginning stages of the technology. When he studies about the past, of how it was like in the 2000s, in his World History 350 class, he realizes immediate differences. He was born into a Korea with a thriving economy, a crime rate so low it seems strange to see CCTVs turned on anymore, and people actually do seem happier.

The CS doesn’t really detect soulmates per se, but rather when two people have feelings towards each other, both of their hearts glow. Literally.

“It detects the change in hormones within the person's body, finds a match nearby, and then it glows a bright pink-peach color,” his professor says, pointing to an anatomical diagram of how the CardiSoul worked.

The CS worked because at the time of invention, it was instantly much less confusing and much more relieving to both parties who might try to hide their feelings or play it off as something else. It was like an instant confession without even needing words.

“So basically, the CS helps people know what really lies in their hearts feel rather than confusing themselves with their brain?” a girl asks.

“Correct, while obviously a person can decide whether or not to begin a relationship, it helped many in falling in love, and finding happiness,” the professor answers. “Additionally, the rate of cheating has dropped dramatically because if someone's heart glowed for another person other than their partner, they would instantly know. Their partner would know as well since their hearts will no longer glow for each other.”

It was understandable between both parties; either they break up, or fix their relationship until their hearts work together again. Obviously, it wouldn't be an easy road, but the CS cuts all the bullshit out and honestly reveals what each partner is thinking. In a way, Yoongi can't really complain about that.

All that aside, Yoongi still hates the CS because he hates the thought of love; the thought of becoming a different person for a someone else. He hates the commercials of CS-related technology like rings that glow when they're near or beds with special effects when two lovers are in it. The commercials always show how happy they seem, dumb smiles and overly giddy laughs that don't make sense. No one is really that happy, for goodness sakes.

“The CS is as normal as like getting a vaccine nowadays,” the professor drones on. “Most doctors include the procedure right after the baby is born unless there's a specific request from the parent not to.”

Some people, as a result, don't have it at all but it does make it a little harder for them and their partners. As a result of that, not many stay in very long relationships and many others decide to get it themselves later on in life. It's the combination of mass media and conformity.

Yoongi has to admit his own heart has never glowed. Maybe it had broken. Or maybe his parents were the type to request that Yoongi not have the CS surgery as a baby. And maybe he just doesn't care enough.

He sits in World History, the professor rambling off about something else he hasn't listened to while deep in thought. Yoongi has the textbook flipped to the pages running off about pre-CS technology, how people would have lived, and how life was like.

He knows he'll never be able to experience that, and that he's stuck in a lifestyle that he couldn't really understand. Love wasn't really necessary to live, why was it such a big part of society not just today, but even from the very beginning?

 

In the lecture hall across from Yoongi's, Jimin sits intently, eyes flickering up to the teacher while constantly writing down notes on the lesson. If Yoongi hated love, Jimin hated it more. He would agree that love wasn't necessary to live and rather, it was a distraction. At least, not the love the CS technology aimed for. He only loved his family: his parents and little brother.

All he wants in life is to study hard through university, get his degree, work hard and live comfortably in the end. He really doesn't need to get involved with love because the last time his heart glowed, it was for a noona who was three years his age. All it was, was really awkward for the both of them. They never did anything, just avoided each other until the girl moved away and they never saw each other again.

He's convinced himself now, through the pain from the past, that there's no way he'll let something like that get in the way of his goals. In all honesty, he feels he gets enough exposure to love watching his two best friends Jungkook and Taehyung. He makes fun of them often, but it's okay because they're happy and Jimin is happy too.

 

When it's time to eat his lunch, Yoongi groans at the sight of crowds of teenagers in one place. Hearts glow too much here because of dating couples. The ones who have been in a relationship in a while glow less brightly, probably not because their love has diminished but because they've learned to keep control of it. On the other hand, new couples make Yoongi want to punch them in their faces.

He quickly grabs the food he wants, and heads over to a random empty table. Unlike high school, at least no one cared if you sat alone in the dining hall for lunch. He would eat with someone—like his friends Namjoon, Seokjin and Hoseok, if they all didn't take the same calculus class together. Namjoon and Yoongi were both music majors, why did he even need to take that specific class? He quickly eats his meal to avoid being in this place any longer.

With a two hour break between his World History class and his Music Theory class, he heads back to his dorm. When he arrives, he sees a small crowd of people around the bulletin board in the main entrance hall. He appreciates the fact his dorm and resident advisors and community leaders are trying to make everything as comfortable and fun as possible, but at the same time, it wasn't like he was going to participate in any of that anyway.

He is a junior now, and he almost regrets not signing that apartment contract a year ago with his three friends. I definitely will sign it this time, he thinks to himself.

The crowd starts to clear up, and Yoongi approaches the board because of, you know, curiosity. It was a large and flashy poster talking about a “great community party with all your dormmates!” and “find your one and only soulmate!”. Yoongi rolls his eyes at the unnecessary addition of the soulmate part. Yet, Yoongi isn't surprised because his dorm building was the largest one on campus. Hell, he expects people from other dorms at this party. The chance of finding “love” would probably occur at every corner. Not that it meant anything, because it's been proven that the CS can't yet get around the effects of alcohol and other substances on the body. Hearts would be glowing left and right, but it doesn't really count if you're under the influence.

Anyway, this event would be taking place in one of the large rooms that is pretty much only used for large gatherings, so he takes note to avoid that area that night. He remembers the first and only time he had been inside was for orientation after he moved in as a freshman. He's not really sure what he's still doing here but he blames his laziness and procrastination for not finding an apartment.

“How stupid,” Yoongi murmurs to himself and to his surprise, a voice responds.

“I know right?”

Yoongi's eyes widen and he turns to his left to see a brown haired male around the same height as he is, with round pink cheeks, plump lips and small but intense brown eyes. He's dressed in a plain light blue button up, black skinny jeans, a pair of yellow Timberland boots, a snapback worn backwards and adorning a black backpack with a red Supreme label on the front pouch.

“You too?” Yoongi responds casually, deciding to stop eyeing him.

He nods, “I hate those kinds of things. But I end up going anyway because my friends always want to go.”

Yoongi can't help but chuckle a little, “Funny enough, my friends always go too, but they don't bother to even ask me.”

The boy laughs back, and Yoongi notices how his eyes disappear and it crinkles in a very youthful way. His face was so babylike—was he really a university student? “Maybe we have the same friends.”

“No,” Yoongi's voice raise in sarcasm because that's really impossible. But even then, Yoongi decides to ask in all seriousness, “You don't really think so, do you?”

The boy shrugs, “Maybe somehow through a whole line of relationships, there's some common friends.”

“Well, either way, it's nice to know I'm not the only one who feels this way about...you know...”

“Love,” he finishes and Yoongi raises his eyebrows. He wasn't going to say that so bluntly, but this opens up a whole another common trait.

“Yeah,” he decides to go with it.

“People only go because they want to have fun and ultimately find someone to mess around with and pretend they're not in school.”

This makes Yoongi smirk in curiosity, “Not a party kid?”

“First of all, “hyung”, I'm not a kid,” the boy sasses. “And second, it's not that I dislike parties, but the fact...people...just...just there's no way to make a strong friendship through one event when there's 40,000 people here. Once you party with them and fool around, are you really going to meet up with them and hang out again? No, people just disappear.”

“There are things called phones and social media, you know,” Yoongi says. “Just for the record, I met my current friends through a party.”

“So, what, you don't go to these parties but you met your friends at one?”

“It was a private party, jesus.”

“Ooooh, private huh,” he sneers.

“Shut up, it was a party that one of my classmates held, so,” Yoongi almost wants to slap this kid.

“Whatever, either way, I hate these.”

“What it seems like is you have a personal grudge,” Yoongi bluntly says.

“Look, you don't really know me, so don't judge. I hate these kinds of things and so do you, right? That's all we know.”

“Yoongi.”

“What?”

“My name. Min Yoongi. You know my name, now.”

The boy looks awkward, almost as if he didn't want to know his name. “Park Jimin.” He sighs, “It's um...nice to meet you, I guess.”

“Yeah,” Yoongi smirks again.

“Well...uh...I'm going to go study. I'll...see you...I guess.”

Jimin walks away and to Yoongi, he thinks that this Jimin kid is okay.

 

The night of the party, Jimin's friends Taehyung and Jungkook once again made him go, much to his dismay. He was happy that it was a casual type of party, so not too long after the party started, he left his dorm with the two already waiting for him at the front of his door.

Coming to this made him think about Yoongi—that person he had met just because they both hated these types of things. He couldn't help but smile because he remembers how Yoongi had such nice, shiny and fluffy pink hair contrasting with his resting bitch face expression. He remembers how it was still quite endearing, and the way he talked with him just felt so casual and normal. He likes how Yoongi is so blunt about things, but talks slowly and blinks slowly, so it almost seems to soften the blow. He remembers that this is the first time he's ever been able to really express his feelings about love and the way college life is, because trying to talk to the Taekook couple was impossible.

Most of all, he remembers that Yoongi probably won't be here because he never comes, but at the corners of Jimin's eyes, he can't stop hoping.

And it's strange that he would think of fate when they're on the dance floor, where Jimin is trying to awkwardly shuffle away from Taehyung and Jungkook making out, their hearts glowing bluntly under their sweaters, he bumps into Yoongi.

He almost felt something spark at the sight of him.

Both of their eyes widen as they stand right outside the dance crowd, the music blaring and it's so dark in the room but flashy with strobe lights you just feel tipsy from trying to see clearly.

“You!” they both exclaim at the same time.

“Yoongi hyung!” Jimin continues first. “I'm so glad you're here! Let's get out, now, okay?”

“What? I just got here!” Yoongi is reluctant to Jimin's pull.

“Does it matter? You don't like it here, do you?”

It only takes Yoongi one glance and a second of consideration that despite how dark it is, there's shining hearts everywhere and responds, “Definitely not.”

Jimin grins widely and Yoongi notices how his teeth are really straight and tiny and perfect underneath the blacklights and before he knows it, they're out in the main lobby of the dorm again.

“Why were you there anyway?” Jimin asks, raising an eyebrow.

“Just...you know...” it wasn't like Yoongi really knew the answer either. All he knew was that he probably gave a stroke to his friends because he decided to come, even for the five minutes before he bumped into Jimin. “Curious. I regret it though.”

Jimin pouts, “Aww...if you didn't go, we wouldn't be here right now!”

“Jimin.”

“Yeah?”

“Are you a freshman?”

He nods.

“What a baby,” Yoongi rolls his eyes. “And no wonder you warm up to people so quickly. How annoyingly friendly of you.”

Jimin decides to ignore that comment and asks back, “What about you?”

“I'm a junior.”

“Ohhhh, two years older I see,” Jimin smiles again, just for no reason. Life is surely brighter in Jimin's world.

Yoongi scoffs and says, “Well anyway, do you want to go out?”

Jimin's eyes widen, “...What???”

“Oh,” Yoongi realizes he's been misunderstood. “I mean...like go outside. To somewhere. Like eat.”

Jimin breaks into a nervous laugh and twists the black ring on his left pinky finger, “That's what you meant...yes, please. I'm pretty hungry.”

“Okay, let's go.”

Without any further hesitation, he throws his arm around Yoongi's shoulder, and it makes Yoongi kind of pissed that a kid two years younger than him is essentially the same height as he is.

It doesn't really matter within thirty minutes because they seemed to have really hit it off.

Yoongi actually enjoys the company of Jimin, as loud and weird as it might be. They go to a midnight pizza restaurant and it's weird how similar their taste in food is. He realizes not only is Jimin a young child at the tender age of 18, but also he's the definition of sunshine and happiness. At the end of the night, as he's older, Yoongi offers to pay for the entire meal until he realizes that Jimin had already paid when he “was going to the bathroom”.

In a way, it scared Yoongi a lot.

 

 

 

Chapter Text

Weeks pass by without encountering each other again, Jimin almost regrets not asking for Yoongi's number because it was really really fun to talk and hang out with him. But when he receives a B- in his latest pop quiz, he crashes down to reality. He's been wasting time. Wasting time searching up different pizza combinations Yoongi and he might like. Wasting time online shopping because damn, Yoongi's outfits were on point. Taehyung occasionally catches Jimin and jokes, “Oh my god, you're not studying? Are you really my roommate Park Jimin? What have you done with him?”. Jimin has been wasting all this time trying to find a connection—somewhere, somehow, that would lead him back to the elder.

Then he takes one look at his planner and realizes midterms are arriving within a week. He needs to keep his grades up not only because he needs that scholarship so that he's on a full ride, but also he's worked so hard already.

Jimin wants to cry at how easily he's distracted, and within that day, he decided there was no time to fool around anymore. He should have known, though, that this was going to happen. He knows he's too nice to the wrong people. The day they met, Jimin never intended to become Yoongi's friend; they were just strangers looking at the same bulletin board. Yoongi introduced himself to Jimin first, and it was common courtesy to respond accordingly. He didn't intend to bump into Yoongi at the party, but even though they left the place together, Yoongi asked him to go eat first. Jimin could have stopped it right there, but it turns out Yoongi is right, Jimin's is just too friendly. Now he's left with dropped grades and a feeling of emptiness inside.

Jimin practically lives in the university's library for the week as a result, only returning to his dorm to sleep a few hours or get a book for research. He had been successful so far, with only two more days until the start of test week, he feels a lot less nervous. Studying cleared his mind and allowed him to focus on what's really important and the reason he came to college: to learn and graduate with a degree for a better future.

He feels so confident until he sees that black beanie with the word “Swag” embroidered in curly letters pass by him. He turns around so quickly his head is filled with lights swimming in his eyes for several seconds. But he knew it was him. The way he walked gave it away.

Jimin turns back to his books and sighs. He should continue studying and researching and making sure he didn't forget anything that he might not know on the exams. He also should be mad at Yoongi for making him become like this but at the same time, he missed Yoongi. There's such a weird power that Yoongi has over him—it's kind of like the time with the noona—no, no...Jimin cannot allow himself to feel that way again.

The day after the party, his roommate Taehyung had texted him about where he went because he couldn't find him. Jimin simply replied that he was with a friend, earning a mocking response of “Oh you had other friends??? hahahah jk ily bro dont sell my games pls”. It was weird indeed, he thought for bit. Yes, they've only hung out once, but it was one of the most fun nights he's had ever since starting college (granted, that wasn't very long). Even though his grades suffered, Jimin figures he really did make a new friend within those two times he was with Yoongi, or at least he hoped Yoongi felt the same way.

Jimin was much too curious to see if Yoongi did, if Yoongi was studying too, if Yoongi maybe wanted to go get pizza again, if Yoongi also missed him. He gives in to his curiosity, packs up quickly, and walks in the direction of where Yoongi seemed to have passed. He sneaks quietly, as to not look too conspicuous, but in the end, he's met with a, “You okay there?”

Jimin whips his head around in embarrassment and is about to bow down to apologize for being such a weird person, except he sees the one person he was looking for, right in front of him with a catty smirk and sharp eyes.

“Hyung!” Jimin yells a little too happily and then quickly covers his mouth, hoping he didn't disturb anyone too much.

“What is it that you were doing?”

“Uh...” he pauses but soon after answers meekly but honestly, “Looking...for you.”

Yoongi laughs lightly a little, and Jimin is happy to see it again. “Have you been trying to find me?”

“No!” Jimin answers a little too quickly, attempting to cover the heat of embarrassment on his cheeks. “J-just...I thought I saw you, and yeah...”

“Were you studying?”

He nods, “The whole week.”

“Mm...well...I shouldn't bother you then, right?”

“It-it's okay, I finished for today. I think I'll be good for midterms,” Jimin flashes a bright smile that feels a bit forced but he just hopes Yoongi doesn't see through it.

“Ah, well...I was here to study, too. For my World History class,” Yoongi lifts up the book he had been holding in his hand.

“Oh...”Jimin couldn't help the tone of disappointment in his voice.

“We can grab a study room, if you want. I'm sure we can find one,” Yoongi suggests and somehow Jimin feels Yoongi knows he wants to spend time with him.

“Really? I...well...I don't want to bother you, either.”

“Aish, if I say it's okay, it's okay!” he smiles widely, pushing Jimin's forehead with two fingers and it looks like Yoongi's an angel descended from heaven. Jimin feels like he's melting under it.

They do manage to find a small study room, one that's all the way in the corner, but it's still nicely ventilated and bright. Jimin never uses study rooms because weren't they reserved or something? He unknowingly says this out loud and it garners a loud, hearty laugh from Yoongi saying how he's such a freshman.

Jimin finds it sweet, though. It's like he's Yoongi's freshman, sitting in the study room with only the two of them, working hard like the college students they are supposed to be.

Jimin finds himself glancing a little too often across the table to where his focused hyung is. He tries to hide this by having his laptop open, glancing at the screen opened to a random page of an online textbook, then glancing up to where he can watch Yoongi's hardworking gaze.

He yelps when Yoongi's eyes meet his own in the tenth time Jimin attempts to steal a glance, his face is getting hot by the second until he finally averts his sight towards his computer again.

“I'm tired,” Yoongi stretches, acting completely normal while Jimin feels like he's dying.

Jimin feels like he's suffocating from embarrassment and he doesn't know what to say.

“Jimin-ah, do you mind getting me coffee?” Yoongi asks, taking out his wallet and handing him five dollars. “At the cafe downstairs.”

Normally, if this was Taehyung or Jungkook, he'd sass and complain as to why they couldn't do it themselves. Here, Jimin is itching to leave the awkwardness and embarrassment he's currently experiencing, so he jumps out of his chair too fast.

“H-uh...sure,” Jimin shakily grabs the bill and starts for the door. “What kind?”

“I'll trust your judgment,” Yoongi smiles. “Oh, by the way, if you dare use your own money, I'll never talk to you again.”

Jimin smiles softly and replies a quick 'alright' before leaving.

Once the door closes, Yoongi collapses onto the desk. Why did Jimin have to stare at him so much? He barely had gotten anything done, and he tried so hard to pretend as if nothing was happening.

In reality, he might have wanted to stare Jimin back. He might have realized how comforting Jimin's presence was, whether or not he was glancing at him once every five seconds. After that day, they hadn't seen each other for so long and Yoongi seemed to almost forget that Jimin was someone real who went to the same school as he did. He should have known, he thinks, that Jimin would be in the library. He had learned that Jimin was a very, very hard worker—that he wanted to work in the medical field, a job with a high pay, and he wanted to live comfortably with his family. He had learned that Jimin had a 4.0 so far, although he's just a freshman with a couple months under his belt, he's been acing every quiz and assignment he's gotten.

He had learned that Jimin wasn't interested in the idea of love because of his past in which he had his heart broken by a girl who ignored and stayed away from him. She ended up going to high school and disappeared from his life. He was devastated for a month, and his parents worriedly kept track of him and his schoolwork. They kindly tried to remind him that it wasn't the end of the world, that Jimin could definitely find someone better and that as a growing child, he should remember to study hard so he could live well in the future. Therefore, after having his heart broken, Jimin dedicated himself only to himself, his studies and his family. He couldn't be distracted by something like love again.

At the very least, Jimin had a pretty legitimate reason. Yoongi—he just found no reason to need love. He supposed the fact that the constant commercials and clinics promoting the CS built up the hatred towards the emotion that was supposedly the secret to a happy life. He's lived this long without ever falling in love, so he believes it's all brainwashing hype.

Now that Yoongi thinks about it, Jimin was living proof that one could be happy without it. Jimin was all smiles and cute, innocence but also naïve-ness, yet hardworking and driven. The thought of him made Yoongi's chest swell.

Yoongi continually thuds his head on the desk, hands tangled in his hair. Why couldn't he stop thinking about the boy now? He's never done this before, not in high school, not after meeting Namjoon or Hoseok or Jin, not ever. There was never a person in his life that made him feel like this.

“Hyung?”

Yoongi snaps up in surprise, wondering how long he had been doing that for. Jimin stands next to him, holding a mocha cappuccino with whipped cream placed plentifully on top. He always did like sweet things. “Thank you.” He takes the cup and sips the warm beverage.

“Your change,” Jimin holds out and Yoongi puts his hand under his casually until Jimin brushes his fingers against his, just ever so gently, and the coins fall into his palm.

Then Jimin's eyes curve up just slightly and he reaches out to fix a strand of unruly hair on the top of Yoongi's head.

Yoongi tenses up a little though, just how can his touch make him so nervous?

“You do look a bit out of it,” Jimin laughs lightly. “Do you like it?” Jimin asks, sitting back on his side of the table (when did he get there?).

Yoongi smiles and says, “Yeah. I like chocolate. And sweet flavors.”

“That's good.”

“Do you want to try it?” he offers.

Jimin's ears perk up, and he replies a little more enthusiastically than he expected. “Sure!”

Jimin tastes the drink happily, and he doesn't fail to notice how Yoongi's expression soften at the sight. It tastes delicious, honestly, but what really satisfies this entire day is seeing Yoongi's eyes on him.

 

 

 

Chapter Text

 

 

Maybe it was a little crazy, but for the next few days, Yoongi couldn't get the image of Jimin out of his head. He wasn't specifically thinking of explicit things (although he admits it might have popped in his head once because honestly, how good would Jimin's thick lips look wrapped arou—)(He promptly shoves that thought into the deepest abyss of his mind). No, he thinks more about the fact that his pinky finger is pudgier than the rest, how small his hands looked holding the cup of coffee, how soft and cute his eye smile was.

The idea of seeing and referring to Jimin as cute and adorable, especially so quickly, was getting out of hand. He knows he shouldn't be thinking of that towards a friend, let alone a male friend whom he knows to be straight. Yoongi wonders if it would be more reassuring to know that Jimin could possibly like men like he did, but then again he shoves that thought straight down the shower drain. It shouldn't matter.

Even though Yoongi hates to acknowledge the existence of the CS inside of his heart, he's quite thankful nothing glowed. That of course, could mean a few things. Other than not having one to begin with, One, that he didn't feel anything towards Jimin, and he did; two, that Jimin didn't feel anything but he did; or three, neither of them actually liked each other in that way.

He hopes that it isn't the second reason.

 

After midterms are over, the intensity of workload lessens by a lot.

“Do you want to get lunch today?” Yoongi types into his phone, contemplating on what kind of message to send to the kid that he hasn't seen in a week. They had exchanged numbers at the study session, but despite that, they haven't had a decent conversation through text since Jimin was so focused. Therefore, he had wanted to hang out with him again ever since the study session—a week is pretty long, right?

He deletes the message and types, “hey, let's eat together today” like as if it's all casual, but realizes how thirsty it sounds and cringes while pressing the backspace.

“Jiminnie, what are you up to?” Yoongi also cringes at the nickname he's just given Jimin and quickly erases it.

“Are you hungry?”

“What are you in the mood for right now?”

In the end, Yoongi deletes them all and doesn't send a single one, stuffing his head into his pillow. He's so conflicted over the fact that he's conflicted about sending a text.

Then, his phone receives a message of his own; it's almost embarrassing how fast Yoongi opens the message up.

“Hi hyung, do you want to eat together today? I saw there's a new type of pizza at that pizza restaurant and I really really want to try it! Let's go, yeah?”

Right after that, another text comes in.

“Sorry I havent really talked to u since we studied together...but about my exams! Ill tell you how I did when we meet up :3”

Yoongi has to tell himself to wipe his gummy smile off of his face after reading those texts.

“Is this supposed to be a bribe?” Yoongi responds.

“What ttt....

no.......maybe......

don't u wanna know how I did?”

“Nope. I'm sure you did well.” he believes it wholeheartedly because Jimin is such a hardworking person.

“aww hyung dont you miss me?!?!”

“bye” Yoongi starts changing into more presentable clothing.

“ill see u there okkkk lets meet at 5”

He grins at the fact that Jimin assumes he's going to come anyway. Or maybe that was just his way of guilting him into going, that cunning little shit.

 

Nevertheless, it's obvious that Yoongi does go, and Jimin waves enthusiastically at him once he sees that fashionable man walk in.

Jimin swears he hasn't stalked Yoongi on his Facebook for the past hour, waiting until 5 pm for his hyung, hopefully, to come in. When he does, he can't help but notice how striking Yoongi looks all the time, just like a model.

“Hi!” Jimin greets, getting up. Jimin lifts his hand to high five him or something but he loses all his composure when Yoongi reaches to grab his hand, then bringing him into a quick manly hug instead with a pat on the back.

“Looks like you've been here a while,” Yoongi releases him, and sits across from him. He points at the already empty cup of water, only a bit of ice settling at the bottom.

“W-wha—no—not really, I was just really thirsty,” and Jimin can only hope that Yoongi can't tell what a bad liar he is.

“Well anyway, what's this new pizza?” Yoongi asks, opening the menu in front of him. He peruses the options carefully, because his lips pucker up just slightly which makes his cheeks puff up. Jimin laughs to himself because that's actually really really cute.

“Oh!” he remembers that Yoongi asked him a question. “It's like a fruity, spicy pizza! The toppings are well...fruity and spicy.”

Jimin pulls the menu from Yoongi down onto the table and flips to the page with the description and points, “Here!”

When Jimin glances back up he's met with Yoongi's eyes staring back at him. The sight makes his heart do a million flips at once and his face starts to heat up. He leans back into his seat and breaks eye contact with him. Yoongi had been staring at him so earnestly he didn't know what to think of it.

Luckily, the waiter finally comes by and asks what they wanted, and they order that special new pizza to try it out. Otherwise, a somewhat awkward air surrounded them now.

Jimin appreciates Yoongi's attempt at dispelling it though. “How were your exams? It seems like you wanted me to ask.”

“Oh hehe...” Jimin smiles, shaking off the thoughts in his head. “I'm pretty sure I did well on all of them.”

“Pretty sure?”

“Well it's not like I got the results back yet, it's only been week,” Jimin explains. “Maybe in the next few days.”

Yoongi nods. Jimin appreciates Yoongi's silence most of the times, but at this point, he wants him to just keep talking.

“How about yours?”

Yoongi shrugs. “I did alright I guess.”

“Did you actually study or were you just in the library to act like you were?” Jimin says, and it garners a scoff from his hyung.

“Yah, just because I'm not a nerd like you doesn't mean I'm an idiot!”

“Actually...”

“Are you calling me stupid?” Yoongi slams his hand on the table playfully and his gummy smile appears. It makes Jimin melt just a little bit inside and he can't help but enjoy teasing Yoongi.

“I mean if you're not smart like me then what would the opposite be?”

“Yah Park Jimin!”

 

After pizza, Jimin finds himself wanting to spend more time with Yoongi, no matter how lame that might be or how full they were.

“Hey how about ice cream?!” Jimin points at the really popular ice cream stand where you're able to get foot long ice cream cones.

Yoongi rolls his eyes, “Like you need anymore sugar. The pizza was already sweeter than I expected.”

“Wow what's that supposed to meannnn,” Jimin whines, as he latches on to Yoongi's arm.

“It means what you want it to mean,” Yoongi shakes Jimin off of him, but not before he lets him linger for a second.

“Hmmmm well maybe you just need some extra sugar, hyung,” Jimin reaches up with his fingertips and gently brushes against the skin underneath Yoongi's eye. “You look so tired you look more than two years older than me!”

“Yah what's that—”

“It means what you want it to mean suga hyung~” Jimin giggles mischievously and Yoongi can feel a blush creeping up his neck. What the fuck was “suga hyung”?

“Su...ga...” Yoongi cringes just hearing it come from his mouth.

“Don't you like my nickname for you? It's cute isn't it? I just thought of it!”

“You know what, we're not getting ice cream. Let's go,” Yoongi harshly pulls Jimin away from the place.

They end up getting something savory instead—pajeon and ddeokbokki. Jimin loves savory foods, but he had been trying to stay away from snack stands in order to control his portions.

“You don't need to lose weight, Jimin,” Yoongi says, poking a rice cake and bringing it to Jimin's mouth.

It's something that Jimin likes about Yoongi—the fact that he's so honest yet he can act so cool and nonchalant. He can't help but to look up to him.

Jimin eagerly opens his mouth, but he responds with, “It's not that, it's because it's gonna make my face bloat and then I'll look chubby.”

“Like I said,” Yoongi says without a blink of an eye. “You don't need to worry about your weight.”

“Hyung—“

“Just eat good food,” Yoongi feeds him some more and Jimin convinces himself that his is normal hyung/dongsaeng relationship.

But by the end of the day, Jimin fears he can't fool himself anymore.

“Be safe, okay? Tell me when you get home.”

He's afraid because what would that make their relationship? He can't like Yoongi because they were the ones who became friends on the basis of hating love and the idea of liking another person in that way. Not to mention, didn't he like girls? How could Yoongi make him feel this way as well? Even though in this millennium there's nothing to worry about whether he likes men or women, he's just never experienced liking someone of the same gender.

Yoongi ruffles his hair and gives Jimin his signature gummy smile one last time.

“You sure you don't want me to walk you back to the dorm? I'm going somewhere else and it's kinda on the way, so I can. I won't judge because you're a freshman.”

Jimin laughs lightly and shakes his head, “I think I'm able to get home after a month, hyung.”

“Okay don't get distracted and go straight back to your room.”

Why is Yoongi so sweet? He fit the nickname “Suga hyung” better than he expected.

“I got it hyung. I'll text you when I get back.”

“Okay. I'll...I'll see you tomorrow or something I guess.”

“Mhm.”

Jimin walks off and waves to Yoongi once he's across the street. After that, he refrains himself from turning around, as if he wanted to see if the elder was still there or not. Park Jimin cannot like Min Yoongi. He had to stop it.

 

 

 

Chapter Text

 

Despite these thoughts, when the weekend comes, Jimin ends up texting Yoongi that his friends, once again, invited to him to a freaking frat party thing that he's pretty much forced to go. He tells about how Taehyung and Jungkook are complete shmoozers and bribed their way in (along with company) to a closed party, so it was required that they went for the effort the two put in.

“Please come with me, hyung! I dont wanna be all alone! ;;;;”

“Are you kidding me? Just ditch like the thing in the beginning of the year!”

“I...cant...ditch this time...”

“Why not? It's not like they're gonna keep track of you all night”

“Well...actually...it's because they're counting it as a birthday celebration.”

“Who's?”

“Mines”


Yoongi chokes because holy shit, how did he miss this. He can't really be surprised that Jimin didn't tell him, but still, why didn't he tell him?

Another text comes in, “My birthday is October 13th, but since I was studying, we didn't celebrate. SO my friends decided to.”

“At a public event...”

“Yeah...”

Now Yoongi definitely has to go. For Jimin.

“Okay, okay, I'll come.”

“Yes omfg thank u so much hyung i ”

I...?

Yoongi stares at the hanging letter of the unfinished message a little longer than he really imagined to, wondering if it was just a quick mistake of the finger or Jimin had deleted something that he ultimately decided against. Something like...

i love you!”

Yoongi shuts his eyes and throws his phone onto the bed, and then walks away from it as quickly as possible. How dare he imagine (and slightly hope for) something like that (even if it was meant to be platonic(as platonic as I love yous go)).

 

 

“Woah woah woah, Min Yoongi wants to go out to this?” Namjoon animatedly asks a question that really doesn't need to be asked.

“Yes, I said yes! You guys are going to come right?”

Namjoon, Seokjin and Hoseok are all present, and Yoongi had come over to their apartment (the one Yoongi idiotically declined to sign the contract with) to talk about this situation. It doesn't matter in the end that much because Yoongi has a spare key. He sleeps on Hoseok's separate futon in his room so he can practically live there whenever he wants.

“Are you sure we can come along? I don't even know these kids,” Namjoon says.

“It doesn't matter they can sneak you in too, probably,” Yoongi rolls his eyes.

“Ooh rebel Yoongi,” Seokjin chuckles and for the life of him, Yoongi can't think of a good comeback. It was Jimin's birthday—he promised he'd go, but it'd be nice if he had his friends go too so that he'd look less of a loser. If anything, Yoongi could pull the “socially awkward” card and guilt the three of them into going.

“We were thinking of going clubbing though,” Hoseok grins. “Thank you lord for non-21 clubs.” Hoseok presses his palms together and prays to whatever God that fuels his spirit. Hoseok and Namjoon are Sophomores, Yoongi is a Junior and Jin is a Senior. Only Jin was legal, and Yoongi was the next one up. Being older, they've had their fill of rowdy house parties already.

“But...” Yoongi starts.

“I think it's worth it if the great Min Yoongi is going to this,” Seokjin laughs.

“Is there a specific reason that you really want to go though?” Seokjin adds, raising his eyebrows.

“No! N-no...” Yoongi stammers and he doesn't know why he needs to be this nervous. “No. It's just someone's birthday.”

“Someone's birthday? You have other friends, hyung?” Once Namjoon says it, Hoseok literally starts howling and loudly smacks Namjoon's hand in the air.

“Oh my god...” Yoongi throws his head back exasperatedly. “Forget I said anything. You guys better show up.”

With that, the weekend comes faster than he expected it to, and it's just a couple hours before 10 pm in which Yoongi and his crew will wait at the apartment. Yoongi told Jimin of their whereabouts and Jimin and his friends have made plans to meet up at the apartment. However, he suddenly remembers he didn't get Jimin a gift. Rushing out of his dorm room in search for one, Yoongi quickly texts their group chat saying he might be a little late because of his stupidity.

 

[KakaoTalk Group: APT PEEPS MINUS YOONGI BC HE HATES US]

DANCE KING JIN

Do you think we should get this birthday friend a gift too?

 

RM

We dont even know who this person is tho

like what do they like and stuff

 

Hopeseok

Aigoo our jin hyung is seriously the nicest~~

 

RM

and yoongi is probably the worst friend

 

#swag

shut up omfg I just didnt have time

 

RM
thats what they all say

 

Hopeseok

wait so what is the birthday boy's name anyway? And the friends that are supposedly going to get us in the party?

Wait

its a guy right

your new friend

right

 

There's silence in the chat for a full minute before Hoseok begins his spasms.

 

Hopeseok

OH YMGOD

YOONGI

HYUGN

DO YOU HAVE A GTIRLFRIED

YOURE NEVER NICE TO ANYONE OTHER THAN US

 

DANCE KING JIN

OMG

YOONGI WHY ARENT YOU ANSWERING

 

Hopeseok

OHMG

OMG F

HOW OCULD YOU BEFORE TELLIGN US

HOLF YSHIT THIS SI WHY OYOU WANTED US TO ACCOPMANY YOU RIGHT SO W E CAN MEET HER HOLT SHIT

 

#swag

are you fuckin serious

his name is jimin. I dont know about his friends

 

Hopeseok

aw you got me excited for no reason

 

RM

LMAOOOOOOOO

sounds familiar I wonder if I know him

 

DANCE KING JIN

you do realize that jimin is a pretty popular name right.......

 

RM

…..............

ok

fine

 

Hopeseok

ew can you guys have your lovers quarrel somewhere else

sorry jin hyung ily but I hate your boyfriend

 

DANCE KING JIN
tis ok :-)

 

RM
I hate you too bro

 

Hopeseok

bro </3

 

#swag

is 25 dollars too much for a gift

 

Hopeseok

YOU DO HAVE A GIRLFRIEND DONT YOU

YOU JUST CHOSE THE MOST GENDER NEUTRAL NAME

 

RM
oh my god here we go again

 

DANCE KING JIN

depends what it is

 

#swag

its a beanie

is that

 

RM
is that what

but what the fuck you never get me anything more than 10 :((((

 

#swag

like...too cliché?

Thats bc I cant afford your fashion sense

 

Hopeseok

I WHOLEHEARTEDLY BELIEVE YOONGI HYUNG HAS A GIRLFRIEND

 

DANCE KING JIN

what brand is it?

 

#swag

dope

I dont have a girlfriend can we drop this

 

Hopeseok

HOW ABOUT A BOYFRIEND

 

#swag

I hate e veryone hows that

 

Hopeseok

ughghsg gh fine

 

RM

I like dope :(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

the brand

not you know...not bout that life

 

#swag

you said it was basic before

 

RM

ok I was drunk but.......buy me stuff too hyung

 

#swag

next birthday

 

RM

<33333

 

#swag

but u shoulda thought of that before you called me the worst friend

 

RM

oh
.
.
.
damn

 

DANCE KING JIN

well if you think he'll like it then get it

 

Hopeseok

you do only have like an hour anyway lololol so

 

#swag

okay

thanks losers

 

RM

oh shit he said thanks im so blessed to have been born in this lifetime

 

 

Chapter Text

Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook arrive at the apartment exactly at 10pm, much to Jimin's whining. “Can't we just celebrate at home?” “Absolutely not,” the Taekook couple says in unison.

They also push Jimin to be the one to knock on the door. Jimin just heaves a sigh and gives a solid knock. It opens pretty quickly, and there stands a very tall man with a very pink sweater with very broad shoulders. His face was comparable to an actor he'd see on a drama. In that moment, Jimin was just starstruck in the moment.

“Are you Jimin?” he says, and it snaps Jimin out of his daze.

“Y-yes!” he gives a small bow and it causes the very pretty man to laugh.

Jimin looks at him confusedly, until he explains, “Sorry, I didn't know how Yoongi's friend would look like...but this is not it.”

“Ah...” Jimin isn't sure if he's supposed to be offended.

“You're so much cuter!” he shrills and Jimin blushes. The very pretty man just called him cute.

“I'm Kim Seokjin,” Seokjin extends a hand out. “You can call me Jin, though.”

“Park Jimin,” he repeats shyly and shakes his hand. “Ah, these are my friends.”

“Jeon Jungkook,” he introduces himself to Jin and Jimin notices how Jin is even taller than Jungkook, something he'd thought wasn't even possible.

“Kim Taehyung!” Taehyung gives a large grin. “Nice to meet you!”

“Anyway, come in!”

They enter the apartment, completely clean and organized. There's a large black couch and a gray knit chaise on wood flooring. There's a widescreen TV filled with games and some movies on the shelves. On the walls, there are a couple skateboards and an entire shelf filled with Bearbrick collectibles, Mario, Pokemon and Maplestory and more. There's also a low table with four handles of alcohol. Oh.

“Jinnie, who was it?” A silver haired man comes out from a room. He's dressed in all black, and Jimin notices that he's also really tall. What was with Yoongi and tall friends? This man is kind of lanky compared to Jin, but his posture and demeanor reminds him of Yoongi. He also notices that his heart is beating a light red through his thin black t-shirt. And so does Jin's.

“This is Jimin,” Jin motions over to Jimin.

Jimin realizes that they're a couple now. While he's usually disgusted by any sign of affection other than Taehyung and Jungkook (actually sometimes including them), he thinks they're actually really cute together.

“Wow...you are not what I expected,” he says. “I'm Kim Namjoon. God of destruction, Jin's boyfriend, Yoongi's partner in crime, et cetera.”

Jimin laughs out loud at his introduction and decides he likes Namjoon a lot too.

“OH MY GOD YOU'RE ALL SO CUTE,” a third person yells, and before Jimin can even turn around, his cheeks are being kneaded by two hands, brown hair and heart-shaped lips really close to his face.

“Okay, which one is Yoongi's boyfriend?” the energetic man says.

Jimin freezes. Did Yoongi tell him he was...?

“Hoseok!” Jin scolds.

“Alright, alright it was a joke,” Hoseok says. “Sorry, didn't mean it. I just like to make fun of Yoongi 'cause he gets so mad. I'm Jung Hoseok.”

Even though Hoseok will probably be the cause of Jimin's premature death from a heart attack, he decides that he likes all of Yoongi's friends.

Everyone gets introduced and the next thing, Hoseok is saying that he's ready to drink.

“Birthday boy,” Hoseok says. “A shot for you.”

“I—I can't drink well,” Jimin says, hoping it'd give him some mercy.

“He can't but he'll take it,” Taehyung butts in and holds out a shot glass for Hoseok to fill, and then hands it to Jimin. Mercy? Not with Taehyung. He didn't even know people had different tolerances until Jimin came along. Taehyung thought that everyone was naturally able to down ten shots in ten minutes.

“We'll all take it together,” Hoseok says. “Hold it for now.”

Jimin stands in the room with his shot, his stomach kind of already gurgling at the sight. Looking around, he notices that Yoongi hasn't showed up. Did he change his mind and decide he didn't want to accompany him to the party? “Hey, where's Yoongi hyung?”

“He's out for now,” Jin says. “He should come back...soon.”

“If he doesn't come back in like 45 minutes, let's just go without him,” Hoseok says.

“Fuck no, you can't just ditch him. Do you have a death wish?” Namjoon retorts.

“Okay but realistically, Yoongi wouldn't even care. He'd just go to sleep,” Hoseok explains.

“No, realistically he'd kill us because he was the one who told us to go in the first place,” Namjoon sighs, handing out shots.

“Hmm, I guess it makes sense since Jimin's here,” Hoseok concedes. “Anyway! Okay shot 1, let's go!”
Jimin pinches his nose and swallows the liquid, clenching his eyes as it burns going down. Jungkook hands him a cup of Gatorade and Jimin gulps the chaser until he can no longer taste the alcohol.

“Thanks Kookie,” Jimin gasps out.

“Yup,” Jungkook places another shot in Jimin's free hand.

“And...I hate you,” Jimin says.

“Happy birthday, hyung,” Jungkook evilly laughs out.

Jimin feels himself loosening up already, hitting Jungkook several times with his foot.

Then Taehyung comes over and says, “Okay Taeminkook shot!”

“What is this name?” Jimin laughs.

“Squad shot,” Taehyung nudges Jimin on his side.

“Squad shot,” Jimin smiles and takes the second one of the night.

 

 

Yoongi comes it about half an hour past 10, and he's met with everyone's eyes on him. Considering that he's usually ignored when he comes home, he's not sure what to do.

“What the...” he just mumbles.

He's looking at a scene similar to a sitcom:

Namjoon's in the process of cleaning up broken glass (what a surprise)

Jin got his Polaroid camera in one hand and five Polaroids in the other.

Hoseok's is just about to pour an unfamiliar kid with a very photogenic face another shot. This kid also looks like he's a deer caught in headlights, with the size of his eyes.

And then there's another kid he doesn't recognize with messy but fluffy light brown hair, like an anime protagonist right off of the screen.

His hand is half way up underneath Jimin's shirt. And Jimin's laying on the couch with a face as red as the red on Kumamon's cheeks.

All while a loud upbeat song is playing in the background.

불타오르네 !

“...fuck,” Yoongi swears. It surely is burning up in here.

“Yoongi!” Hoseok is the first to exclaim. “Finally, you show up!”

“I leave you guys for an hour and a half and you've got broken glass and Jimin being molested,” Yoongi jokes stalely, closing the door as he makes eye contact with Jimin.

Jimin seems to realize this and pushes the anime boy off of him.

“I got too excited and spilled some alcohol on him,” anime boy just smiles, showing a towel in the hand that was under his shirt. “Don't worry.”

“Uh...”

“I'm Kim Taehyung!” he introduces. Then he points to the deer caught in headlights boy. “That's Jeon Jungkook. We're Jiminnie's friends.”

“Ah,” Yoongi remembers that Jimin briefly mentioned their names before. He also remembers that Taehyung and Jungkook were a couple. He feels strangely relieved. “Nice to meet you...I suppose.”

“You have a lot to catch up,” Namjoon says, finishing scooping up the glass. “Hoseok's probably at like, what, seven?”

“Eight now,” he says as he takes the shot with Jungkook.

“Yeah, yeah,” Yoongi waves them off and walks over to Jimin. Jimin's eyes are glassy, and his cheeks and lips are plumper than usual, and it makes him even more endearing. Yoongi can't help but laugh at the way Jimin looks up at him like a puppy.

“Why-why are you-you laughing, hyung?” Jimin stutter-laughs through his response.

“Happy birthday, Jimin.”

“Thanks!”

“I...uh...this is for you,” Yoongi lifts up a paper bag with the words Stussy printed on it.

“Wow, wait, you didn't have to...” Jimin sits up and takes the gift. Yoongi wonders if he's going to open it up right here and now. Jimin adds, “Taehyung and Jungkook didn't even get me anything.”

“We're going to give you a good time!” Jungkook defends.

“Shit friends,” Yoongi says just loud enough for Jimin to hear, and sits right beside him. He can't help but grin because Jimin looks really happy just clutching the bag to his chest.

“It's okay,” Jimin laughs. “I'd be surprised if they bought me anything. Besides, I have you.”

Yoongi averts his eyes to his fingers, staying silent. He knows that he didn't mean you as in Yoongi himself, but because he bought him a present. Still, he keeps his head down because he doesn't want to see Jimin know that he's trying really hard not to smile.

“You're probably the bestest friend I've ever had,” Jimin says, and it sounds really sincere. But then he just laughs out really loud so Yoongi just ruffles his hair.

“Open this later,” Yoongi takes the gift and places it down by the couch. “Let's get back to the losers. I have about eight shots to catch up with.”

“Hoseok hyung said that you're a lightweight,” Jimin says. “Not that I'm any better. Haha.”

“Oh my god, of course he would.”

 

 

Chapter Text

Taehyung and Jungkook tells the rest of the squad to stay in the long ass line to the entrance of the fraternity's house as they slyly wiggle their way up through to talk to the frat bros. Youth by Troye Sivan is blasting through the open door and windows right now and Yoongi has to say, it can't be all that bad if they have enough taste to play Troye.

Jimin keeps wobbling and pressing against Yoongi's shoulder so in order to make sure that he doesn't fall, he's got an arm around Jimin's waist. So he doesn't fall. Because Yoongi is a good hyung.

“Jimin, stay up! You can't fall asleep now,” Hoseok says, pressing Jimin's cheeks.

“I—I'm okay,” Jimin weakly lifts a hand to make an OK signal.

“Aigoo,” Hoseok wraps his arms around Jimin. “What a cutie.”

“Hoseok,” Yoongi almost growls. “Stop suffocating him.”

“I'm not!” Hoseok says. “He's just cute.”

“Why do you keep saying that? Do you actually like him?” Yoongi is completely brutal and he blames the five shots (he only managed that much before they decided to leave the apartment).

Hoseok has a glint in his eyes and an evil smirk, and suddenly Yoongi regrets that he ever let his mouth run. Then Taehyung and Jungkook comes running back and says they're all cleared to go. They grab Jimin and run off with him.

Hoseok closes the gap between Yoongi and smirks right under him, “No it's not like that...but I have a feeling of who might.”

Yoongi has shit friends.

When Yoongi enters, he's certain of one thing: he should have brought sunglasses. Yes, he knows it'd be stupid to wear them inside. The only lights that are on are blacklights, but in his defense, there's also the obnoxious glow of pink and red from the chests of hundreds of drunk people.

“Here,” Namjoon comes up and hands him a beer.

“Thanks,” Yoongi finds a open couch arm and leans against it, cracking open the can and taking a sip. The song has now changed to some annoying, shit song he doesn't recognize. He sighs and takes another sip. Where did Jimin's friends even go?

“Where's everyone else?” Yoongi asks when Namjoon and Jin approaches him.

“The bar,” Namjoon says. “Gotta take advantage of that free alcohol. Well, probably not Jimin.”

“The poor kid's probably completely wasted already,” Jin sighs.

“Yeah, that is their goal,” Namjoon sighs back. “It's his birthday, of all things.”

Yoongi just listens and sips his beer. He doesn't know what he imagined when he agreed to go to this for Jimin. It's not like he wouldn't do it for him—in fact, that is exactly the reason he's here: because Park Jimin has a strange influence in him and asked Yoongi to go. With another thought, it's kind of obvious that it would turn out like this. Jimin is completely drunk out of his mind and most likely won't remember that Yoongi was even here.

Even then, Yoongi would still rather be here instead of sitting at home, regretting not going. He probably wouldn't be able to live with the guilt. That's saying a lot because Yoongi rarely feels guilty about his actions; that's just the type of person he is.

Namjoon and Jin is gone without Yoongi noticing, probably to make out, and suddenly, Taehyung and Jungkook has taken their place.

“Our new favorite hyung!” Taehyung exclaims, on the right side of Yoongi. Jungkook slides up to his left, and Yoongi is claustrophobic all of a sudden.

“How are you doing? Good? Good—me too,” Jungkook slings an arm over Yoongi's shoulder.

“So okay okay listen here...” Taehyung begins wiggling his eyebrows.

“What?” Yoongi asks.

“Park Jimin,” Jungkook says matter-of-factly, like as if Yoongi was supposed to know exactly what they wanted.

“What?” he says again.

Taehyung leans in close to Yoongi's face and he can smell the vodka from his breathe. “What do you think of him?”

Yoongi opens his mouth, but neither his brain or mouth can manage to say anything. He settles for, “You're a little close. I can't breathe.”

“Do you like him, hyung?” Jungkook asks with an unsettling straight facial expression.

“Do you?” Taehyung is getting a little excited.

“Yeah do you?” Jungkook repeats. “Tell us first. We're his friends.”

His friends are incredibly strange and Yoongi has no fucking idea of how to answer them. He means, yes, of course he likes Jimin, but as a friend. Yoongi isn’t that drunk to not know what they really meant though .

But then like none of that awkwardness happened, Taehyung just slaps Yoongi on the back and says, “Jokes hyung! It's okay, we understand it can be hard! Don't be so stiff all the time!”

What are they even talking about? Yoongi thinks.

“But honestly, you should consider Jiminnie!” Taehyung gives a thumbs up. “He's a very very very good person and you wouldn't regret it!”

“What the fuck...” Yoongi curses and feigns ignorance. “...are you two going on about?”

“Jimin is just very precious to us, as you may know. It's our responsibility to make sure he doesn't end up forever alone!” Jungkook explains.

“And honestly we think you'd be the best...”

At that moment, Yoongi tunes the two out as his eyes found Jimin. In fact, he tunes everything out as his eyes find on a very drunk but objectively pretty freakin’ hot Park Jimin lying on the couch across from him. He has a huge smile on and his hair is sticking to his forehead by the sheen of sweat and…his heart is glowing gaudy, glaring pink straight through his white shirt.

It's actually quite gorgeous on him.

Yoongi's stomach feels it's gradually constricting and his breath is caught in his throat.

A girl is snuggled up to Jimin's side, one hand not very decently placed on Jimin's thighs, the other poking his cheek. Then—he's sure it's on purpose—the girl somehow spills a bit of her drink onto Jimin's shirt. While Jimin is just a little surprised, she panics and overreacts, probably apologizing with a sugar sweet tone. Her hands tend to Jimin's wet shirt, rubbing against the fabric as if her hands were towels. Jimin just sits up and says something—his expression looks forgiving, but he doesn't remove the girls' hand from his upper body. They stare at each other for a weird amount of time (according to Yoongi) and he swears the girl is inching her face closer to Jimin each heart-pounding second.

They don't move for a second and Yoongi was really fucking worried, like unreasonably fucking worried, that he'd see the two of them... Anyway, for what reason this feeling comes from, he doesn't know. But he watches as Jimin lends his ear to the girl as she whispers something that makes him laugh really, really happily. He watches as her heart beats right next to his in unison, and like a side-effect, Yoongi's heart feels it's about to explode from anger.

Yoongi gets up abruptly, pushes through Taehyung and Jungkook and rushes off to the bathroom. His vision is blurred by the tons of other glowing hears right up in his face, and he trips and wobbles a few times or so before he reaches the door. It's so gross in here, and everything is making him even more nauseous to the point that Yoongi just drops to the toilet and pukes his entire day's meal out. The sting of the acid from his stomach brings tears to his eyes instantly, and he could feel the strange, unfamiliar feeling of his stomach muscles contracting and trying to expel all the food and liquid poison out of his system. Yoongi abhors throwing up; the last time he had ever done it was in his first year of high school because he was just that sick.

He coughs and wipes his tears and mouth with toilet paper, and then dry gags a little more from the taste of his half digested food. Yoongi sighs and slams his fist against the wall of the bathroom.

“What the fuck, Min Yoongi!” he yells at himself. “What the fuck are you doing?!”

Get it together. He berates himself in his head as he tries to gather himself again.

A few loud knocks bring Yoongi back into the reality of being at a party.

“Yoongi—Yoongi are you in here?” a voice calls out. He's not able to identify the voice, so fearing the worst, he ignores it.

“It's Jin, it's me. Let me in, please.”

Yoongi groans but gets up. He washes his hands thoroughly with water and then goes to open the door. Jin looks at him pitifully and motions to let him in. Yoongi just leans against the opposite wall, covers his face with his palms and takes a deep sigh. Jin closes and locks the door to the bathroom and pulls one of Yoongi hands away to hand him a cup of water.

“Taehyung came to me and said you didn’t seem too good, that you probably went to the bathroom,” Jin said. “Are you okay? Now, at least?”

“It's whatever,” Yoongi says. He's gotten a minute to recover from his hurling and he's sobering up immediately.

“What happened? Did you just drink too much?”

“Yeah,” Yoongi lies. “I'm not a tank like you guys.”

“Sorry,” Jin apologizes. “We didn't mean for this to happen.”

“I know.”

“So what do you want to do now? Do you want to just go home or?”

“I don't want to walk back by myself, honestly,” Yoongi says. He doesn't want to leave Jimin with that girl just yet.

“I can walk back with you. Namjoon is getting all fucked up, too. Ah sorry, I shouldn't swear.”

“You know I don't care, hyung,” Yoongi scoffs with a smile. “No, just go back, I'll hang out in here for a little while more but after that I should be fine.”

“You sure?” Jin raises an eyebrow. “I would be willing to leave now.”
“Hyung, I'm really okay,” Yoongi says. “I just need to sit down for a bit, that's all.” He finishes the cup of water that Jin had gotten him to prove it.

“Okay, well, if you want to leave, just text me,” Jin says finally before he takes his leave.

Yoongi returns to the same couch that he bolted from at first, but to his disappointment, Jimin and that girl is nowhere to be found. He plops down and groans loudly while covering his face. He's not pleased at himself for his actions tonight. As he's now quickly sobering up, he's instantly regretting everything that he's said and done tonight.

Yoongi thinks about his friends—they usually tease him when he meets new people on his own, saying that that's the person he'd finally fall for, but it never happens. It's not super surprising that they'd do the same to Jimin, but for some reason, they've almost pushed it too far as if they believe there was something between the two of them. But there isn't; Jimin and him are just good friends. He knows this. He doesn't want shit like what his friends say to stop them from being friends. After all, Jimin feels just as uncomfortable with the topic of love as he does.

From all the things his friends said, (he doesn't really want to blame it all on them but...) it's making Yoongi overthink everything. In the end, Yoongi thinks he should have just gone with just Jimin. Maybe the best decision was not to invite his friends. He should have sucked it up and gone with just Jimin and his friends and sit alone in the corner—just as he's doing now.

If he had, maybe he wouldn't have been so confused at the feelings that he got. Maybe he wouldn't have been so inebriated to the point that he puked.

If he hadn't got so drunk, combined with snide albeit well-intentioned (he thinks) comments of how Jimin was “boyfriend material”, maybe, just maybe, the current nagging thought of wanting to be the person that makes Jimin's heart glow would have never came to be, settling into the bottom of Yoongi’s stomach and planting knots that he’s never felt before.

Chapter Text

“Yoongi there you are!” a hand pulls on Yoongi's shoulder roughly. It's Hoseok—a very sweaty and drunk Hoseok. He's holding a nearly passed out Namjoon on one side, Jin supporting him on the other.

            “Namjoon is wasted so we're gonna head back. Do you want to come? We're all leaving,” Hoseok explains in bullet points.

            “What about Jimin? And his friends?”

            “They're already outside.”

            “Is Jimin okay?” Yoongi gets up finally.

            Hoseok grins, “Yep yep! He's quite drunk still, but he's better than when we first came in.”

            Yoongi just nods, and internally is very relieved. He's a little annoyed that they'll have to slug their way back to the apartment though, and this thought carries through when he sees Jimin, all smiles, messy hair and the occasional stumble.

            “Uh—should we order an Uber?” Yoongi asks, mainly keeping his eyes on Jimin. “I don't think that half of us are gonna make it back if we walk.”

            “Yeah, that's a good idea. Do you want to do it or...?” Hoseok motions to the fact that he's preoccupied carrying a drunk Namjoon.

            “Yeah I got it,” Yoongi whips out his phone and quickly orders a ride. “Okay, should be here in like three minutes. It's a black Hyundai SUV.”

            Through the corner of his eyes, Yoongi keeps a track of how Jimin is doing. He's calmed down now, and he's plopped himself onto the lawn of the frat house (which he personally probably wouldn't trust), legs apart and hands limply in between. His eyes are closed, and it looks like he's enjoying the cool breeze against the expanse of his chest and soft face. Yoongi is a little angry that he notices this stuff but then again, this night was full of surprises.

            “I'm hungry,” Taehyung breaks the silence.

            “Me too,” Jimin replies, eyes still closed but a smile has developed.

            “I'll see what I have back at home,” Jin says.

            “Jin hyung is our favorite,” Jungkook claps. “Right?”

            “Yes,” Taehyung and Jimin agree.

            Yoongi chuckles a little at their friendship. It's quite adorable, even if they are annoying sometimes.

            “I bet Jimin likes Yoongi hyung more though,” Jungkook adds in.

            This causes Jimin to snap his eyes open. They meet Yoongi's and they both quickly avert away.

            Jimin seems to make a low growl something similar to, “Shut up Jungkook. And why can’t you ever call me hyung too.”

            “You did say that I'm probably the “bestest friend you've ever had”,” Yoongi reminds Jimin.

            “...Did I?” Jimin might be blushing. “Huh, maybe I did.”

            “Wow I see how it is, best friend. Or maybe I should say former,” Taehyung cries crocodile tears.

            “Sometimes I wonder how we're friends at all,” Jimin retorts, laughing. “That's why Yoongi hyung is a better best friend than you.”

            “Bullllllshit.”

            “Fight me, Kim Taehyung.”

            In that moment, Yoongi thinks that Jimin and him might be okay after all.

 

            The Uber comes not too long after and they somehow stuff all seven of them into the car, Jin apologizing about fifty times to the driver. Luckily enough, the driver is a pretty cool dude and makes the conversation and ride comfortable. Jimin isn’t seated next to him, so at least Yoongi doesn't have to go through several stages of panic again. Yoongi also wonders if he might be a masochist because even then he kind of wanted Jimin to sit next to him.

            The minute they arrive back at the apartment, the three young ones tackle the bathroom. Jimin uses it first and the other two sit on the ground right outside. Taehyung has his head rested against Jungkook’s shoulder, both of their eyes closed peacefully. Their chests beat a nice pinkish red slowly in unison.

            “What?” Jungkook asks. Yoongi jumps just a little bit as he’s caught staring.

            “No nothing,” Yoongi scratches his nape. “You two are okay together, I guess. That’s all.”

            Yoongi scrambles off to his room before he can notice Jungkook smirking knowingly.

 

           

            Jin is a really good cook. Jimin admires him to himself as he watches Jin intently create some meal from random things in the fridge.

            In the off time of waiting for the food to cook a bit, he gets Jimin a cup of water as he sits at the kitchen island.

            “Thanks hyung.”

            Jin smiles back fondly and goes back to his food. As Jimin handles the cup with both of his hands and sips, Jin starts talking about the one thing that Jimin has had in his mind pretty much all night: Yoongi.

            “I just wanted to apologize if anyone teased you too much about Yoongi tonight,” Jin starts off.

            Jimin raises an eyebrow. “Oh?”

            “It's just because even though we're his friends, we never really get to see this side of him. Don't tell him I told you, but he was really worried over whether or not to get you a gift, not to mention one that you would actually like. Yoongi is a really caring person, but he also does it in a way that’s not obvious so it's easily taken for granted.”

            “Ah...” Jimin smiles with a downward gaze to his cup. “I know what you mean.”

            “Yeah, so we gotta tease him every once in a while,” Jin laughs, then turns to glance at Jimin for a second, then goes back to the pot of food.

            “...But I think you're really good for him,” Jin states with a small smile to himself.

            Jimin's heart starts racing at that. Because it's so ambiguous—was Jin implying something or was he just saying he was good for Yoongi as a friend?

            “Think what you will, Jimin-ah.” Jin smiles. Jimin wonders if he's just really obvious or if Jin is a mind reader.

            He doesn't really get to think too much, though, because everyone is gathering around the countertop to eat. It isn't really any specific dish that Jin's made, just a combination of ramen, leftover meats, kimchi and leftover pajeon. Regardless though, everyone deliciously devours it and by the end of five minutes, it's pretty much all gone.  

            After their after hours snack, most start to doze off. Yoongi and Hoseok has laid out and pumped up an air mattress and Namjoon's converted their couch-futon to it's convenient bed form. Taehyung and Jungkook are the first ones to knock out, onto the futon, limbs entangled and their glowing hearts slowly fading away as they fall asleep. Hoseok grabs one of his blankets and tosses it onto them. Namjoon and Jin are busy in the kitchen washing up some of the dishes.

            “You gonna sleep here tonight, hyung?” Hoseok asks Yoongi as they're both washing up in the bathroom.

            “Mm,” Yoongi briefly responds, face wash foaming up his entire face.

            “You can sleep in the futon in my room if you want. Or you can sleep on the air mattress. Up to you.”

            “Uhh—” Yoongi easily can sleep anywhere, anytime. However, this time, it's whether or not he wants to share a bed with someone he's been very much confused about these days. Since the couch futon is taken, Jimin is sure to sleep on the air mattress.

            “Ey don't need to think so hard,” Hoseok chuckles. “Whatever you want, man. I'm just sayin'.”

            Yoongi's face is heating up at thought, but he'll just blame the redness from his night creams and serums. “Yeah. Thanks.”

           

            One of the greatest features of this apartment was its balcony, or at least Yoongi thinks so. He uses the 5 by 3 feet outside space the most as he always feels more refreshed and inspired after spending a little bit of time in fresh air, all the privacy of their own place. Yoongi finds himself leaning against the railings after he's washed up. Everyone's gone to bed, but the entire nights events are playing through his head like an annoying record. He breathes in the chilly air, allowing all the feelings run its course through his body until he really can't hold it in anymore, then exhales, purging the thoughts by the oxygen seeping into his system again, savoring the feeling.

            Yoongi isn't prepared then, when he hears the balcony doors slide open, and a sweet but quiet voice call to him.

            “Hyung? A-are you not going to sleep yet?” “Wow, was it this cold?”

            Yoongi is grateful the railing does its job because his heart felt like it jumped off the balcony. He turns around and sees the bare faced Jimin soft with just little blemishes from acne, shadows casting onto his face from the street lights. His cheeks are residually flushed red from the alcohol, but it's not a bad look at all. He's changed into a gray sweatshirt and black shorts. Holy shit, Yoongi thinks after it all. Holy fucking shit.

            There's a bag in Jimin's hand, Yoongi notices. “Ah, Jimin.”

            “I couldn't really sleep either actually. I-I saw that you weren't asleep yet and I was curious about um—your gift...” Jimin stammers, not really able to keep constant eye contact with Yoongi. “Thought that I would open it here. Now.”

            Yoongi can't help but smile at his words. “Well, I hope you like it. Otherwise it's gonna be awkward as fuck.”

            Jimin gives a lighthearted laugh, his voice bubbling higher than usual, and Yoongi really feels like he's melting. “I'll like it, don't worry. I don't usually get gifts, so this is...this is really nice.”

            Yoongi motions to the chair in the corner of the space, “You can sit down.”

            Jimin takes it and places the bag on the floor, in between his legs. Yoongi has a careful gaze on Jimin's face—for his reaction, of course.

            Slowly, Jimin pulls the wrapping paper out from the Stussy bag, until he reaches the crinkly bag of plastic. He pulls it out, and Yoongi's heart pounds with relief as Jimin's expression made this entire night worth it. All smiles as he looks at the bag, which he figures is an article of clothing, even though he hasn't even opened it fully yet.

            He does that right after he looks back at Yoongi, catching the latter off guard. “Hyung—oh my god, this is so nice!”
            “It's nothing,” Yoongi waves it off. “I hope you're okay with this brand. I had a similar brand in mind at first but then I switched to this one cuz I really liked it when I saw it. I mean the other thing was a beanie too but I figured that this would be more conventional and practical. Uh, but if you wanted the hat instead I can—you know what, just, never mind.” Yoongi zipz his mouth from rambling any further. “Anyway, it's nothing. Open it up, Jiminnie.”

            Jimin knows in a way, it isn't nothing, if Jin was telling the truth about Yoongi spending all that time finding him a gift. He blushes at the way Yoongi calls him 'Jiminnie'; although everyone calls him that, it sounds so poignant coming from Yoongi. He finally opens the plastic bag and pulls out a hoodie, stylized with a block of nude tan color on the top half of hoodie and black on the bottom half. Stussy is embroidered around the torso area of the top, and the black inner lining of the hood gives it a nice touch.

            “I love it,” Jimin simply says. “I'm gonna try this on.”

            “It's yours. I'm glad you like it.”

            Yoongi might have overestimated Jimin's body size because the medium sized hoodie on Jimin's slim shoulders makes the sleeves go all the way to the knuckles of his hands. A second after that thought, he realized this was a blessing in disguise. Jimin tries to pull up the sleeves a little bit, but ends up just grasping the ends of the sleeves with his petite fingers. He does a little spin and then asks, “How is it?”

            “It's—it's nice,” Yoongi chokes up a little bit. It's really more than nice, it's beautiful and it suits Jimin so well.

            “This is very much your style, I think,” Jimin grins. “I always admire your style, so I'm happy that I'm one step closer to being like you.” He then leans against the railing next to Yoongi, like how Yoongi was at first.

            “Please, Jimin, out of everyone, why would you admire me?” Yoongi rolls his eyes.

            “It's true!” Jimin huffs. “Not my fault if you don't believe me.”

            “Is the hoodie warm enough? I know it's kind of thin,” Yoongi changes the topic when he notices Jimin cupping his fingers to his mouth.

            “Oh! No, no it is! I guess my alcohol blanket is just wearing off so I'm just shaking from that.”

            “Should we go back inside?”

            “I'm okay! Don't worry, hyung,” Jimin says. “I can't break that easily. I gotta be like you, hyung, remember? And you're just wearing a thin jacket.”

            “Yes, but I also get sick easily,” Yoongi counters. “Again, I don't know what you see in me.”

            Jimin doesn't say it out loud, but he comes up with a bunch of reasons why he really does look up to the man next to him. How Yoongi is so caring in a subtle way, not just to Jimin but the rest of his friends; how Yoongi always has some advice for whatever problem Jimin rants about; how Yoongi obviously has struggles and issues that he tackles himself, but because he is so strong, independent and mature, he rarely shows it; how everything about Yoongi is what Jimin would want to be as well. And there's something heartwarming about the time they spend together now, that Jimin doesn't realize what these feelings are until he's asked a very unexpected question.

            “So...who was that girl? Are you guys...”

            Jimin's chest starts rapidly increasing in tempo. “Huh?”

            “The girl at the party. Just curious, I guess. Just caught a glimpse of the two of you.”

            Jimin doesn't answer. He thinks back at that encounter. The girl was pretty and sexy—Jimin honestly cannot deny that. However, the entire time he was slightly uncomfortable as one: she spilled her drink onto him and two: her hands were way, way too touchy-feely in the wrong way, and he finally just got up from the couch after she tried to snake one under his shirt.

            “Sorry. Should I not have asked?” Yoongi tries to retract his statement after the silence from Jimin.

            Jimin quickly shakes his head in apology, “No not at all! I was—I was just thinking. I mean, she's cute I guess. But you know, it's not like I like her. You know how I—how we—feel about that. A-and, the CS doesn't work right when you're drunk and all, so our hearts glowing really doesn't mean anything, you know?” Jimin really doesn't have to defend himself that much, but he really feels the need to.

            “I know. But if you did...I mean, it's whatever. Can't stop you.” Yoongi's stomach constricts a little from saying that.

            “Hyung, what kind of person would I be if I said that I hated love but fell this easily?” Jimin jokes, but his smile falls off his face when realizes the truth of his sentence. Truly, how could Jimin fall for someone so easily? Hadn't he learned anything from the last time? Yoongi turns his head to him and gives a small grin that, for some reason, makes Jimin's heart race again.

            “Point taken.”

            Then he really feels it. The descent into a hole he's dug and pushed himself into.

            Jimin's sincerely, hardcore crushing on Min Yoongi, his friend that hates love just as Jimin is supposed to as well.

Chapter Text

Jimin is the first one to wake up in the apartment. He wakes up with the feeling of peace that you only see or read in movies and fiction novels—soft white light peeking through the blinds, birds chirping—things like that that makes him forget it's halfway through October. Then again, he figures he's just in a really good mood. Jimin doesn't feel anything close to a hangover other than a bit of a parched throat, thank god.

He slowly sits up from the airbed, and then he sees Min Yoongi's back facing him. Suddenly, Jimin's overly conscious of every move that he makes—his breathing, his position, where his hands are—and his breathing halts for the hot second that Yoongi takes to move from a side position to where he's facing back up. He grumbles a little bit in his sleep that makes Jimin's heart melt. Out of spontaneity, Jimin grabs his phone right by him, and snaps a quick picture.

However, at the same time that Jimin’s enthusing over Yoongi, he remembers his realization from last night. The thought does scare him because he really shouldn’t be having feelings, especially towards someone that doesn’t feel the same way. Just thinking about it makes Jimin’s stomach churn a little and his chest ache a little. He stares at the photo he’s taken, and hovers right over the delete button, but he can’t really find the guts to either. To counter this tender moment, Jimin brings up Snapchat and snaps the same picture of a sleeping Yoongi again, but this time, scribbling stupid designs over his face. Jimin giggles almost silently as he’s finishing his masterpiece, then sends the snap to everyone in the apartment.

Placing the phone back down, he also lies onto his side, facing Yoongi. Like as if he was on cue, Yoongi turns onto his side, this time facing Jimin; suddenly, Jimin’s staring right at him, soft breaths tickling his neck. He now recalls how as they were finally heading to bed after their talk on the balcony, Yoongi said that he was going to sleep on the air bed too, making Jimin’s heart thump hard in his chest for the hundredth time that night. Yoongi made a quick addition, saying that he didn’t want to bother Hoseok by going into his room and having to pull out the futon, but Jimin honestly didn’t really mind. He didn’t mention that he didn’t mind, but just nodded and before he knew it, both of them were wrapped under the blankets, fast asleep.

For a moment, Jimin believes in love—that this feeling must be what it feels to be in a loving relationship—and it’s completely worth it. But he quickly makes himself also believe that he’s overreacting. They were platonic, friends under the basis of both having a vendetta against romance.

Park Jimin is a hypocrite.

Before he’s able to wallow in more self-deprecation over his feelings, shuffling could be heard and Jin emerges from his room. As an instinct (from Taehyung often barging into their room loudly and unannounced), Jimin pretends to be asleep.

“Oh, hm, Yoongi slept here.” Jimin hears Jin mumble to himself as he shuffles past them to the bathroom. “That’s cute.”

No, it is not cute. Jimin tries to think to himself. Jin most likely didn't mean anything by it really, but it still makes his unknown feelings worse. He squeezes his eyes tighter and curls up into himself.

 

-

 

Jimin wakes up for the second time, this time to the laughter of his friends. Everyone is awake now and he wonders how long he’s been out.

“Jimin is up!” Taehyung points out. He comes over next to Jimin with his phone in hand. “We’re looking at Yoongi-hyung’s music!”

He raises an eyebrow at this. He knows Yoongi was a music major, but he’s never mentioned that he’s made music before.

“His…music?” he asks groggily.

“Yes!!! Yoongi hyung, Namjoon hyung and Hoseok hyung all produce their own music!” Taehyung enthuses excitedly. “Man I wish I could rap, too. You should listen to their cyphers!”

Jimin makes eye contact with Yoongi, who’s looking a little shy as (what Jimin assumes is) Yoongi’s music playing from the laptop.

“What the heck, you never told me!” Jimin shouts, feigning anger as he stumbles and stomps over to Yoongi.

“I—uh—”

“You never told me you made music, hyung. That's so cool,” Jimin calms down and peers over to the laptop.

“Yeah...I usually don't announce it to the world.”

“Except he has a soundcloud with all his music, out there in the world,” Hoseok adds with a roll of his eyes.

“What's your soundcloud?” Jimin asks.

“It's uh—it's AgustD.”

Taehyung immediately minimizes the iTunes window and goes to the browser and types in soundcloud. The web bar immediately suggests AgustD's soundcloud.

“Is it this?”

“Yeah,” Yoongi answers. Jimin takes a glance at Yoongi through the side of his eyes. He can't tell if Yoongi has always acted so quiet and sort of shy, or if it's just Jimin's imagination because he's hyper-aware of him. Jimin still feels his face get hot when he looks at him, so he quickly returns his gaze back to the screen, but with a small smile on his face because Yoongi is really, quite attractive.

 

-

 

It seems that this discovery of Yoongi's other side—this rough voiced, gritty yet emotional music producer makes Jimin all the more interested in getting to know him. With that, Jimin has been able to bear with his new found feelings and find a whole world of things to talk about. As friends, of course. Even then, Jimin feels like they're at a good state right now.

“So when did you write this one?” Jimin asks as he places two coffees (well, his being coffee flavored sugar) on the table of the coffee shop they've met up at in between classes. Jimin's referencing to this sprawl of lyrics in Yoongi's notebook.

“It's not finished yet,” Yoongi sighs. “I've been trying to finish this for two years now.” Yoongi takes a sip of his Americano, and then flips the page. “Won't be happening today, either.”

“Why not?”

“I don't know. Can't find the inspiration. The words.”

“Just gotta find it, huh?” Jimin smiles softly, and Yoongi simply nods, without thinking much about it.

 

-

 

It's when Yoongi is unable to sleep at 4 am in the morning, with a 8:30 am class looming ahead, Yoongi thinks about what Jimin had said again. But he doesn't just think about that; he also thinks of the way Jimin smiled so soft, with full cheeks and crinkled eyes. Jimin's words echo in his mind—of finding the inspiration, and like that, inspiration and Jimin is linked together in him, like some miracle. Jimin was so eager and enthusiastic talking to Yoongi about his music. Jimin had told him that his music was beautiful and emotional. Jimin was all sorts of honest with Yoongi, and as such, Jimin's happiness just simply talking about music with him is seared into his mind and warmed the pit of his stomach.

Yoongi sits up from his bed, and grabs the notebook he keeps by him at all times. Flipping to an empty page, he starts to write down all his thoughts he's had this night.

 

The very next day, Yoongi gushes about it to Namjoon, who has been the only other person to know about this one page of lyrics he's been stuck on (Hoseok doesn't even know).

“Wow...this is...wow,” Namjoon faintly whispers as he reads the page from his notebook. “This is fucking good shit. And you said you wrote the rest of this in one night?”

“Yeah, yesterday.”

“Yoongi...hyung...this is so good,” Namjoon hands the notebook back to him. “You need to make this into a song, ASAP.”

“I was planning on it. I really like it, too,” Yoongi smiles down into his hands. He's so happy, so relieved that he's finished this since forever and it turned out to be better than what he imagined.

“Where did this sudden inspiration come from?”

“Well actually, Jimin saw this notebook the other day. And uh, he just said something about finding inspiration and all—I don't know. Just came to me at night, I guess.”

“So it's all thanks to Jimin, huh?” Namjoon laughs.

Yoongi stares at Namjoon. Namjoon had said it lightly, not really meaning anything from that, but suddenly, he's realized. Yoongi was able to finish the song—he was literally inspired and driven—by Jimin. His happiness, his eagerness—it was all something Yoongi wanted to see again.

“Hyung you okay?” Namjoon places a hand on Yoongi's shoulder.

Yoongi instantly feels his face burning up. Quickly, he stuffs the notebook back into his backpack and gives a half-hearted excuse, “Sorry, I realized I'm gonna be late for class. See you later.”

 

Okay, so he had a class in half an hour really, so he's settled down at the campus quad on an empty bench and releases a huge sigh. His warm breath creates a cloud of condensation, wisping upwards and fading away along as the crisp but cold wind breezes by. Yoongi realizes the effect Park Jimin has on him now. It wasn't a bad thing at all, and that was the problem. This kind of feeling he's been having towards Jimin was getting awfully close to something he swore not to have. It would literally lead him straight to heartbreak, and he had successfully avoided all that up until now.

And maybe this is the universe placing a curse on him for trying to avoid anything related to romance, because he feels things are quickly developing too fast. He thinks it definitely is a curse because the boy of his thoughts has magically appeared in front of him.

“Yoongi hyung?” Jimin's voice is soft as he slowly approaches him more when Yoongi makes eye contact with him. Jimin exhales a chuckle, “What are you going here just sitting in the cold?”

“Don't you know this is my natural habitat,” Yoongi snides naturally, almost as if he wasn't feeling his heart jump to a steady 120 beats per minute just at the sight of Jimin. “My cold heart can't melt too much.”

Jimin laughs,” Okay please, you're probably the least cold person I know, hyung.”

Yoongi doesn't realize he's staring until Jimin's finished laughing like the fucking angel he is.

“Jimin, sit down,” Yoongi says as he scoots over the bench. “I have something to show you.”

“What is it?”

“I finished the lyrics. The one that I've been working on for a while,” Yoongi says, scratching his nape shyly as he hands Jimin his notebook.

Jimin's eyes light up as he recognizes the notebook. “Really?! How come you were able to finish it all of a sudden?”

There is a moment of silence where Yoongi helps Jimin flip to the right page. “Just...what you said.”

“What I said?”

“About like...finding inspiration.”

“Wow—I was kinda bullshitting but I guess whatever works, right?” Jimin smiles. “What made it happen?”

Yoongi blushes but he hopes Jimin will just blame it on the wind. He rolls his eyes and says, “Your bullshit worked, Jiminnie. Just accept it.”

“O-okay,” Jimin stutters. “I'm gonna take a look at it.”

Yoongi tries not to examine Jimin's expressions too much, so he just stares down at his sneakers and plays around with his jacket. He really wants Jimin to like it, and he's definitely a person who wouldn't usually be bothered about others' opinions. Yes, Jimin's opinion somehow holds a lot of weight.

“Wow,” Jimin says after a while. “Amazing, hyung. This is beautiful.”

“Yeah?”

Jimin looks at Yoongi, “Thank you for sharing the finished work with me.”

“Of course. It's just fair.” Internally, Yoongi is so relieved that Jimin says he likes it.

“I'm really amazed,” Jimin adds with a bright smile. “You're so creative and good at what you do, it's honestly moving. I guess since I'm used to just studying all the time—it's crazy how much I'm missing sometimes.”

“I'm sure you're creative, too.”

“I like to draw, sometimes. Haven't really since college, though,” Jimin admits.

“Man, can't relate. I might be good at music or whatever, but shit like painting and modern art goes over my head,” Yoongi jokes.

“Jungkook is really good at it,” Jimin says. “And Taehyung loves art and museums.”

“Yeah, Namjoon and Hoseok is also really into that stuff. Joon tends to like all the philosophical things and Hoseok likes really weird art. Jin hyung and I just sit there and listen to them ramble about stuff we try to understand.”

“—”

A phone rings and it takes Jimin’s attention, a frown appearing when he sees whatever is on his screen.

“What is it?” Yoongi asks out of curiosity.

“Ah…it’s uh…” Jimin waits for the ringing to end. “It’s that girl. From the party.”

It’s Yoongi’s turn to pout. “You got her number?”

“Uh well she asked and I guess I was too nice to say no,” Jimin chuckles nervously. “But she’s been calling me a lot. And she keeps texting me.”

“What’s she want?” Yoongi says. Now he kind of wishes he could take it back because it sounds awfully like jealousy.

“I don’t really know, haha. She just texts me ‘good morning’ and ask me how I am and send me random memes.”

“Do you text her back?”

“Uh, sometimes. Just like really short texts though.”

“Oh.”

“I haven’t actually talked to her since the party. I feel kind of awkward so,” Jimin admits. “Dunno why she keeps trying to call me.”

“I see.”

“But yeah sorry about that—I—I usually try to be nice to people but I kind of just end up in these situations.”

“Let’s get dinner,” Yoongi blurts. “If you’re free.”

“Oh—sure!” Jimin replies in slight surprise.

“I have a class soon, but after, we can grab something to eat.”

“Yeah,” Jimin smiles. “That sounds good.”

It isn’t rare or sudden for them to have dinner or hang out, but Yoongi suddenly feels the urge to grasp tighter on whatever their friendship is.