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Always Worried

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Thornstriker moaned softly against the bigger mech's lips, gripping his shoulders tightly as she felt the younger mech's servos at her waist, though they never dipped any lower than that. She shivered when she felt Bloodshed's glossa slip inside her mouth, tentatively exploring her sweet oral cavity, drawing more moans from the little Autobot. 

He didn't mean to be so impatient in their kiss, but the Decepticon couldn't help it. Another massive battle had broken out between the two factions, and Bloodshed had seen the little green femme on the field. It had made him sick with anxiety. Thornstriker was so weak, so defenseless… An ideal target for a bunch of rowdy Decepticons if they caught sight of her. 

Bloodshed had only seen Thornstriker once during the fight and lost sight of her earlier on in the fight. Despite the battle ending in Decepticon victory, Bloodshed felt everything else but pride. He was too worried about Thornstriker. Did she survive? Was she okay? Had someone gotten to her? Did she get hurt? Killed? It drove him insane not knowing whether or not Thornstriker was all right.

But he was forced to wait two days before he could try contacting the Autobot scientist. His patrol shifts had doubled due to some losses and there was still the inventory and ration checks to be monitored over. He couldn't get a moment to himself and when he did, he had just passed out from exhaustion. Needless to say though that when he finally had the chance to contact her, he had never been so relieved to hear the green femme's voice.

He couldn't wait. He had to see her, as if to confirm in his mind that Thornstriker was okay, that she wasn't hurt. Thornstriker had agreed to meet him down in a cave nearby since neither of them could escape off to Neutral territory for very long. It was just more convenient to meet up somewhere close, but still far from being found. Not that Bloodshed minded. He wanted to see the femme as soon as possible. 

When he saw her down in the cave, simply leaning up against the rocks and waiting patiently for him, Bloodshed lost it. He marched straight up to her, dropped to his knees, and kissed her senseless. Pressed her frame up against his. He just needed tofeel the femme up against him, to confirm that Thornstriker was truly safe. 

The Autobot had been too shocked to react, but she certainly didn't hate it. The mech had never been pushy like this before when they met up, so the kiss just took her by surprise. But she didn't reject it, kissing the eager mech back. It was strange that the mech was kissing her like this. She could feel the servos on her hips shake slightly, almost as if he were afraid. But Thornstriker couldn't ask him anything since her lips were sealed into a firm, hot kiss. 

Finally though, Bloodshed broke the kiss and stared down at the now blushing femme, who was panting from the attack on her lips. Then again, so was he. Primus, he didn't mean to jump the femme like that. He had just been so relieved to see that she was all right that he just... lost himself for a moment. Clearing his throat, he took his servos away from her hips and avoided optic-contact with the femme, a bit ashamed that he lost himself there for a moment.

"Sorry," he murmured softly. "I... I wasn't trying to scare you or jump you... I just... I was only..." The Decepticon finally just stopped talking, realizing that he sounded like a complete idiot and was probably only making the situation worse.

But Thornstriker gave him a soft smile, reaching up a servo and stroking over his cheek. If Bloodshed didn't have as much control on his emotions as he did, she would have guessed that the warrior would have blushed. It was a sight that Thornstriker would probably never see, but still - it was moments like these that made that Bloodshed was sometimes very much like a child.

"No need to apologize," she said. "You didn't do anything wrong... Though that did give me quite a shock."

"Sorry."

"Again, no need for you to apologize." But she dipped her servo down from his cheek to his chin, titling up his helm. "But I must ask... What brought that on? It's not like you to just come charging at me like that." She said that last part with a soft chuckle and smile, which made the bigger mech huff. 

She was simply too adorable for her own good. It was maddening to think about sometimes... And to think that he could have lost her three days ago. Bloodshed, almost instinctively, wrapped his arms around the femme's waist, as though if he were to let go, she would disappear. It made Thornstriker's optics widened, but she remained silent, feeling the other's servos quivering slightly against her back. She wrapped her arms around his helm, pressing him gently into her chassis and stroking over his helm.

"What is it?" Thornstriker asked, more gently this time. Whatever was wrong was obviously greatly bothering the mech much more than Thornstriker had anticipated. "Bloodshed?" 

The red warrior was quite for a few moments, his optics shut as he listened to the steady beat of his beloved's spark. Yesterday he had feared that he would never this soothing sound again. But now he realized that his fears of that were no more, that Thornstriker was safe and unharmed. She was here with him and very much alive. 

Realizing that he had been trembling slightly, he swallowed and calmed himself, stopping the shakes. He opened his optics and looked up at the femme, who just continued to peer down at him with concern. Bloodshed huffed, releasing her and rising to his pedes. "You have no idea the hell I've been through these past few days," he muttered softly. "You... You have no idea how... worried I've been."

Thornstriker blinked, optics narrowing a bit in confusion as she tried to understand what Bloodshed meant. Worried? Worried about what? Had something happen recently where Bloodshed actually needed to be worried? She gave a confused shrug, lifting her servos up in the air as she tried to understand what the mech meant. "I... I'm sorry, but I don't follow."

"I saw you on the battlefield," he growled. "You were ducking for cover... And then I lost you. I was worried that... That a Decepticon had gotten to you."

Thornstriker frowned at the comment. "Bloodshed... I understand that I am physically weaker than most, but I do know how to handle a gun. I may be a scientist, but I have been trained to use a weapon. I'm not a bad shot either."


Bloodshed's optics narrowed. "It doesn't matter... You're still a weak femme. If someone is to get past all your shots, they could easily pin you down and kill you. Or even worse. Hell, it wasn't like it was exactly hard for me to..."

But he stopped himself, realizing what he was about to say. That was the last thing he wanted to bring up, especially now considering that they were alone and in a cave together. That was a land mine that would bring back too many best-forgotten memories if he were to say anything else. 

But Thornstriker wasn't stupid. She knew what Bloodshed was going to say. Her optics widened a bit and she opened her mouth to speak, though nothing came out. Then she bit her bottom lip, hugging herself a bit as she looked down at her pedes. So she was a weakling. She knew this, but Primus, she did know how to handle herself. She was a grown femme, not some sparkling or anything. Truth be told, Bloodshed's impression of her hurt. She wasn't that pathetic... was she?

The Decepticon scolded himself when he saw Thornstriker look away from him. But it didn't seem to be out of fear since the femme wasn't shaking; usually the scientist would be trembling if she was frightened. He ran a hand over his face and mumbled out, "Sorry... I didn't mean it that way."

"But you still think I'm some sort of weakling," the older femme spat at him, looking up to glare. Bloodshed mentally flinched back from it. "Bloodshed, I will not be treated like some helpless damsel, no matter how physically weak I may be. Have you any idea how... pathetic you make me sound?"

"I wasn't trying to-"

"Yes, but you still did anyway."

Bloodshed bit his bottom lip, feeling somewhat guilty for what he had said. He wasn't trying to make it seem like he thought Thornstriker always needed protecting. It was just that he always felt the need to protect her from everything, even if there was nothing to protect her from. He wouldn't change his opinion on Thornstriker being an easy target, but he understood that Thornstriker knew how to fire. That didn't mean she knew how to fight. 

That was what scared him the most. Thornstriker having to fight hand-to-hand, her against some Decepticon. She would lose - no doubt in his mind. But what would that Decepticon do to her? Kill her? Take her prisoner? Or maybe even do what Bloodshed had done to her... Rape her? He wanted to vomit at the thought. All he wanted to do was protect the scientist. He loved her and didn't want her to get hurt or lose her. 

He let out a soft huff and shook his helm. "I'm sorry," he said softly. "And you know I don't think of you as something pathetic. Fuck, I practically put you on a pedestal... But you are weaker than others, Thornstriker... I'm just worried that… what happened with me could happen again with someone else. Or even worse – they could kill you and I wouldn't… I couldn't…" 

The unspoken phrase of "be able to do anything" was one that Bloodshed couldn't force out his mouth. He knew Thornstriker wasn't that weak, but easily, so very easily, could she be pinned down. He had been afraid that it would happen. And he wouldn't have been able to stop it.

Thornstriker's frame and face relaxed a bit, her arms falling to her sides. While she was still annoyed with the idea that Bloodshed thought of her as being so weak and helpless, she knew fellow Autobots who shared that same thought. But at least now she understood why Bloodshed had been so passionate and eager in the kiss. It was his way of confirming that Thornstriker was okay, that she was alive. 

She sighed, stepping up the mech and stretching out a servo, gently resting it on his cheek. Bloodshed's optics widened, but he did nothing to stop the gesture. 

"Bloodshed, I thank you for being concern over my safety," she said softly. "It does mean a lot to me to know that you care so much. However… please – don't worry your sick because of me. I am a grown femme; I know how to take care of myself."

When Bloodshed only nodded, she gave him a soft smile, pulling him down for a gentle kiss. Bloodshed closed his optics and kissed back, his servos going to her waist and pulling her tenderly up against his body. 

Thornstriker smiled a bit wider into the kiss, her arms wrapping around the large mech's neck. Even though Bloodshed had committed such heinous crimes, he wasn't a bad mech. Bad mechs wouldn't care, wouldn't be concerned over anyone or anything but themselves. 

But Bloodshed wasn't like that. In a way, he was like an overgrown child. Always worrying, always concerned, but doing things he knew he shouldn't be doing. He stood by the Decepticons not for the violence, but for the cause, which Thornstriker could understand. Or at least attempt to. 

Still, Thornstriker knew that, although Bloodshed did bad things, he wasn't a bad mech. She wouldn't be kissing the red mech like this if she thought otherwise. She trusted him not to hurt her and, so far, the Decepticon had done nothing to betray her. She just somehow knew it would stay that way too.