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Aomine is a fire hazard

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Kuroko wasn’t quite sure what to make of it when a guy with horns and no clothes appeared in front of his TV while he was watching the news in a cloud of smoke that made Kuroko want to test his smoke alarm when it didn’t go off. “...Would you like some tea? Or maybe a pair of pants?” He eventually asked, because he wasn’t sure what else to do, and the guy looked like he was expecting something.

Aomine at this point didn’t really care whose house he popped into, as long as he could have sex he was happy. That didn’t mean he didn’t know quality ass when he saw it though and the guy he was standing in front of was hot as shit. He stood there looking at the guy waiting for him to fall for his pheromones. He didn’t expect the guy to offer him tea though. Were his pheromones too weak? He tried to intensify the amount of pheromones he was releasing only to see the guy stand up and walk towards the kitchen. What the fuck?

“Do you want sugar in your tea?” Kuroko called from the kitchen as he prepared two cups. He still wasn’t completely convinced that this wasn’t some kind of weird dream, but he decided to just roll with it and see what happened.

Now Aomine was really confused. He walked towards the kitchen and hugged the man from behind. “Why don’t you forget the tea. Let’s have some fun.” He nibbled the guy’s ear and gave it lick.

Kuroko frowned, and ducked out of the other’s arms. “Please don’t do that. I don’t know if that’s okay in whatever world you come from, but here it’s sexual harassment.” He informed him.

What. The. Fuck. Usually people would be melting in his arms after that. Why the hell was this guy so difficult? “Don’t you feel anything when you look at me? Anything at all?”

“Discomfort from the fact that you aren’t wearing pants. Curiosity about why you aren’t wearing pants and have horns. And a vague sense that if I called the police they would think I was joking around if I told them about this.” Kuroko replied.

This was getting ridiculous. Aomine knew he was sexy, why didn’t this guy know it? “Who needs pants when they’re just gonna be taken off.”

“Try next door then, but there will be no taking off of any pants here.” Kuroko turned back to the tea, pouring it into the two cups and holding one out to the . . . whatever it was . . . standing in his kitchen.

Aomine took the cup of tea that was put in front of him in and stared at it in confusion. “What’s wrong with you? Are you sick or something? ‘Cause usually by now people are ready to jump me.”

“I’m not interested in sex.” Kuroko said with a shrug, taking a small sip of the scalding tea.

Not interested in sex?! What the hell did that even mean? Everyone’s interested in sex, even the people who don’t admit it! Aomine stared at Kuroko with an insulted look. This person was not human. He told him as much too. “You aren’t human. What the hell are you?”

I’m not human? Me? You have horns growing out of your head, and appeared out of no where. Shouldn’t I be asking what you are?”

“Well of course I’m not human but I don’t try and live among other humans and pretend to be one!” Aomine put his cup of tea down, walked up to Kuroko and poked him in the cheek, then the stomach. “Ima find out what you are eventually.” He continued to poke Kuroko all over his body.

“Do I get to find out what you are if I tell you?” Kuroko asked, batting Aomine’s hand away from him when it started to move a little too low.

“I’m an incubus,” He mumbled as he pinched Kuroko’s cheeks. He then spun Kuroko around to check his back for wings. He was almost certain this guy was a fairy.

Well, that explained why he was so interested in sex at least. If Kuroko remembered his mythology correctly they were demons that fed on sexual energy. Well, he was shit out of luck here then. “I’m asexual.” Kuroko turned back around, gently pushing the incubus’ chest to try and tell him to give him some space.

Asexual? What the hell is that? He’d never heard of that species. “What’s an asexual? Is it like a dwarf subspecies?”

Kuroko laughed. That was certainly a new response to his sexuality. “No. It’s a human who doesn’t feel sexually attracted to people.” He explained.

Aomine looked at him dumbly. So it was a human subspecies? One that didn’t feel sexual attraction? Well at least that explained why the guy didn’t react to his pheromones. Aomine looked up to the ceiling and thought about it and then looked at the guy with a look of realization, “Does that mean you don’t like physical affectiony stuff too? Like cuddling and hugging and shit like that?”

“If you’re asking to cuddle or hug, I’m going to request that you put on pants before doing so. But no, it doesn’t mean that I don’t like those things. It just means that those things aren’t going to end in sex.” Kuroko said.

Aomine sighed and snapped his fingers, making a pair of brown pants appear on himself. Cuddling wouldn’t really give him as much energy as he would like but it was something. And this guy was super hot. “Can we cuddle then?”

Why not? This was already weird enough. That was the thought process that went through Kuroko’s head as he walked back to his TV to put in a movie. “There should be a blanket in my room. Third door on the left if you want to get that while I find something for us to watch.”

Aomine got the blanket and walked back to the living room to see the man already sat on his couch, waiting for him. It occurred to him that they hadn’t actually introduced themselves yet. “I’m Aomine Daiki by the way.” He said as he plopped himself down next to the man and covered them with the blanket. He then wrapped his arms around the man and drew him close until he was practically sitting in his lap.

“Kuroko Tetsuya.” Kuroko replied, resting his head on Aomine’s chest and wrapping an arm around his waist. “It’s nice to meet you. I’ve never met an incubus before.”

Aomine rested his chin on the Kuroko’s head. “Yeah? Well I’ve never met an asexual before. You’re an interesting human, Tetsu.”

“Tetsuya. Kuroko Tetsuya.” He corrected.

“Yeah, Tetsu.” Aomine looked down at him and smirked.

Kuroko rolled his eyes, and decided not to try again. “I’m also not the only asexual human, you know. So, I’m not sure that that should qualify me as an interesting one.”

“Well you’re the only one I know, which means you’re also the only one I know of that’s cuddled with an incubus. Plenty interesting to me.” Aomine gave Kuroko a small peck on the cheek.

Kuroko considered it. “Well, I certainly can’t say I’ve ever heard of anyone cuddling with an incubus either.” He said. “I only ever hear about them having sex.”

“Yeah… Most incubi don’t try to push sex if they can’t get it, they just move on to the next human and try their luck there. Although all the incubi I know don’t often get rejected.” Aomine placed a small kiss on Kuroko’s forehead.

“If you’re supposed to move onto the next one when you get denied sex, why are you watching a pixar movie with me?” Kuroko asked, tilting his head back to look up at Aomine.

“‘Cause you’re hot.” Aomine winked and gave Kuroko a quick peck on the lips.

“That’s not a good excuse when you’re still not getting sex. Don’t you live off that or something?” Kuroko asked, turning his head away to hide the blush.

“Yeah, but cuddling kinda works too. Just not as much. Like maybe a tenth as much.” Aomine tried his luck and pressed a small kiss on the nape of Kuroko’s neck.

“Is a tenth as much okay? Because I can point you in the direction of my friend Kise, who would probably be all too happy to have a guy with no clothes show up in his appartment if you really need to sleep with someone.”

“Hmm….” Aomine hummed in thought. “Maybe tomorrow. You’re too hot to leave right now.” Aomine continued to press small kisses on Kuroko’s nape, ears and face.

“I’m going to look the same tomorrow. I’ll just have horrible bed head as well.” Kuroko replied.

The bed head sounded cute. “Then I guess I’m just gonna stay here until I really need the sex. Might even come back after that, if you don’t mind.” Aomine didn’t mention that he’d probably really need the sex in about two days.

“Shower before you come back please.” Was Kuroko’s reply to that.

“Can’t I just shower here?” Aomine unconsciously tried to move his hand down Kuroko’s thigh, while giving him another peck on the lips.

Kuroko grabbed Aomine’s hand when it got too close to his crotch, and used it as a shield from the kiss. “No. You are not going to come into my apartment smelling like sweat, sex, and Kise.” He said firmly.

Aomine was taken aback at having kissed his own hand and moved it to hug Kuroko around the waist again. He buried his face in Kuroko’s neck and nuzzled it a bit. “Fine, fine. I’ll shower before I come.” Aomine nipped Kuroko’s neck a bit before placing a final kiss on Kuroko’s cheek.

“Stop that. You’re going to leave a mark.” Kuroko said, rubbing his neck where Aomine’s teeth had made contact.

“Aww, c’mon. It’s fine isn’t it?” Aomine gave a small smirk before nipping at Kuroko’s neck again.

“It is not fine. I have work tomorrow. People are going to ask where those came from. How am I supposed to explain that they came from a sex demon that most people don’t believe in?” He asked, pushing Aomine’s face away from his neck with the palm of his hand.

Aomine gave a throaty laugh and grabbed Kuroko’s hand with his own, entangling their fingers. “Alright, alright, I’ll stop.” He snuck in one more kiss on Kuroko’s lips before resting his chin back on top of Kuroko’s head.


Aomine woke up feeling slightly weak, having not had sex yesterday. They had both fallen asleep on the couch after the movie and he was currently hugging Kuroko from behind. He lifted himself up a bit and looked down at Kuroko. He really did have bad bed head, but it was also really cute. He chuckled a bit and pressed a small kiss to the back of his neck.

“Aomine-kun, I can feel your erection. Kise’s apartment is two doors down.” Kuroko mumbled, not opening his eyes yet.

Aomine hadn’t even noticed his morning wood, too distracted by the beautiful man in his arms. “Maybe later. I’m enjoying the view.” He mumbled as he nuzzled Kuroko’s neck.

“Hmm. Okay. I’m going back to sleep. There’s food in the fridge if you need anything.” Kuroko turned in Aomine’s arms and hid his face against Aomine’s chest to block out the light starting to come from his window. He couldn’t hear his alarm clock, which meant it was still morning, so it was still Izuki’s shift at the kindergarden.

“Mmkay,” Aomine yawned and could feel himself drifting back to sleep. He let himself fall back down onto the couch, buried his face in Kuroko’s hair and fell back into unconsciousness.