Chapter 1: Tony's POV
"I can't stand you when you're drunk!" yelled Steve. They were having another argument. God knows how this one started, but they were, and it was pointless, and it hurt.
"I can't stand you when you're sober!" retorted Tony. 'Because if you're drunk maybe I could tell you things that you won't remember. Things that I don't want you to remember.'
"I'm always sober!"
"That's not my fault!"
"I hate you!" 'Of course you do.'
"I hate you more!" 'No I don't.'
Tony turned on his heel and stormed into the lab, locking the doors behind him.
'I'm such an idiot. He really does hate me. If I had a chance to begin with I've blown it now.' Tony dryly chuckled. 'Of course I didn't stand a chance. He's not into guys. I still sleep with girls, even if I'm gay.' There. He admitted it to himself, after all this time. He'd known of course, that he was into the same sex. He'd only ever told two people. Although it hadn't been telling, not exactly. Y/n had known he was into men for a long time, Pepper knew now too.'
One time at a bar, he didn't want any chicks hitting on him anymore. No, that wasn't true. He didn't want that one brunette to hit on him anymore. He'd gone up to y/n and asked her if she could look like a dude, since he needed to get a girl off his back. It hadn't been the first time they'd kissed. The first time they were around 14, they both knew that they didn't like each other like that after that kiss. Now, when they kissed there was no awkwardness after, it was something they both did to get people off their backs. Y/n had turned into a dude. She(?) had turned into a teenager version of something similar to Captain America, just to torture him. Y/n had looked like a jock, and had been taller than Tony, and fuck, she was hot. After they made out in front of the unwanted brunette to make a point, they had left the bar.
Y/n, back to normal, had bluntly stated "You're into dudes." Tony had simply agreed, they left it at that. She never treated him differently after that. The only thing that changed was that when they watched movies together, or were in public she'd openly state how hot some guys were, or she'd tease him about talking hot guys as well as girls.
Tony never told anyone that he was bi. He never needed to. He would have some one night stands with guys. Not now that he lived at the tower, but he had in the past. The real reason he broke up with Pepper was because she realized he was into guys. Not because she didn't accept that he was bi, but because she was the first to realize that he wasn't bi.
Tony was gay. The whole break up with Pepper was fake. Fake except for the breaking up part.
Y/n knew the real reason behind the breakup as soon as he'd told her. She was always good at reading him.
He could never tell any of the others. Tasha wouldn't care, Clint didn't need to know, Bruce would be fine either way, but he'd tell the others. No matter what, he couldn't tell Steve. Not only couldn't he tell Steve because he liked him in that way, he couldn't tell him because Steve was old fashioned. Steve was probably anti-gay, just because of how he grew up. Steve, perfect, beautiful Steve, was as straight as they come.
'How long have I been in here?' There were at least half a dozen new, unfinished projects scattered around. The only difference between these and the other unfinished ones, was that he couldn't focus on them, rather than prioritizing other projects over them. 'Time for a break.'
Tony left the lab to find the tower dark and deserted. 'Maybe Steve's still up. I should try to apologize, even if he'll still hate me.' He walked to the place he knew Steve would be if he was still awake, the training room.'
Making his way out of the elevator, he saw that there was light shining out from under the door. 'He's still here.' Coming closer to the room he heard the sound of water. 'He must've finished his workout already, maybe I should wait in the training room until he's done?' Tony walked to the door, which slid open almost soundlessly.
"Oh." Tony said, in a small voice. Everything was drained from him, every last bit of hope he had when he saw what lay in front of him. It was a punching bag. A very beat up punching bag. He could tell it had been one of the new ones. Now it looked as if it was twenty years old, and was torn, leaking sand in several places. The worst part? There was a picture of him, of Tony, taped to it.
"Oh." 'So that's how much you hate me.'
He hadn't left the lab in days. He'd locked it, there was no way anyone could go through the door, and JARVIS had instructions to only allow Tony to override it, or to let someone open it if his, or another life depended on it. 'Because I'm working on how selfish I am, you told me to maybe try to fix that.'
"You can't hide in here forever To." 'Shit, y/n can teleport, forgot.' Tony mumbled something incoherent as a response. "I know you're moping about him. Why don't you tell me? It's easier than me having to figure it out by going through camera footage."
"Fine." Tony managed to say. 'Why do I let her do this to me? It's not like talking will change anything. Then again, it's not like it'll change anything. Did that make sense? Fuck, I might need human company.'
Tony went on to explain their latest argument, and what had happened when he went to the training room. Then he dejectedly sank onto a couch that he had recently put in his lab. 'It's almost like saying he hates me out loud makes it more true.'
"I bet you he doesn't hate you." Y/n said, sitting down beside him with a small smirk growing on her face.
"I bet he does." Then, noticing her expression. "What are you up to now?"
"Nothing." 'Right.' After a pointed look from Tony she simply said, "Not telling." 'This'll be the death of me. "I won't kill you, don't worry." Y/n said, then got up and teleported out. 'Did I say that out loud or is she even better at reading me than I thought? Fuck, is she telepathic? No. She can't be.'
Tony left the lab. He wasn't happy, but staying in the lab wasn't a much better option, he was getting absolutely nothing done, and it was driving him nuts. 'Is it because I'm love-sick? Love-sick for a man that is too good for me, and will never like me back?'
"To." Came y/n's voice in a sing-song, teasing sort of way. "Come with me." Tony turned around to face her, only to be grabbed by the wrist and dragged off, god-knows-where.
Turns out, god-knows-where was her room. Which had a TV in it. 'When did she get a TV?'
"JARVIS play the footage please. With audio." Y/n said, and an image appeared on the screen. It was the training room. Tony could see the punching bag. Is this some kind of sick joke?' He saw himself enter and stand there for at least ten minutes then leave.
"Please play the footage of half an hour before this clip JARVIS." Y/n said. JARVIS complied.
'She can't be making me watch this. She can't be making me watch Steve beat up the Tony-Punching bag.' "Why are you doing this to me?" Tony turned his face away from the screen. "I don't want to watch Steve beat up a punching bag with my face on it."
"You won't have to. Just watch." 'What is she on about?' "Please?" Tony turned to face the screen again. Steve had just put up the picture of Tony on the punching bag.
Chapter 2: Steve's POV
What happened in the training room
Steve had just put up the picture of Tony on the punching bag. He'd gotten it from his work out bag. He didn't tell anyone that he had it of course. They would probably tease him, say that he liked Tony. The concept of homosexuality being socially acceptable was still odd to him. Of course, if they teased him about Tony like that, they wouldn't be wrong.
'He hates me. He said it himself. Of course he wouldn't like me like that. He doesn't like men. He comes home with a girl every time he goes out to drink. That's why I hate it when he's drunk. Maybe if I had the guts to tell him that I... no. He wouldn't change the way he is. He'd just tell me he "doesn't swing that way" and move on with his life. I don't stand a chance.' In a moment of anger he flared out and hit the thing closest to him, the punching bag with Tony's picture.
"Fuck." 'Language Cap' came Tony's voice in his head. 'Go away, you're only here to mock me.' "I..." Steve stared at the punching bag with remorse spreading through his every pore. As if the punching bag was really Tony. 'Am I going crazy?' He walked over to it, and picked it up, cradling in it arms like a baby. "I didn't mean that, I swear." 'I'm talking to a punching bag. I really am crazy. Might as well keep going then.' "I could never purposely hurt you. Even if you don't care as much about me as I care about you."
Once he started, he couldn't seem to stop. He hugged the punching bag tightly to him, his throat closing up with coming tears. "I know you hate me. I know, you told me. You probably won't even talk to me, we've been fighting so much. I really don't mean it you know. I just.. I'm so frustrated with myself for not telling you. I know that you won't care so I just try to push you further away." The more he spoke, the more he realized it was true, and the tears came, they started welling up in his eyes. He dropped the punching bag on the floor. "I'm sorry Tony." Steve headed for the showers. At least no one could hear him cry there.
Chapter 3: Tony's POV
Tony saw everything, he may not know what Steve was thinking, but at least he saw.
He watched Steve head for the showers on the screen. 'Oh my god.' He turned around and sobbed into y/n's shoulder. "I'm such an idiot, but he's even more of an idiot, I don't deserve him, and.. and..." Tony blabbered. This was a side he never showed anyone anymore, only y/n was allowed to see him like this, it was a good thing she knew how to cheer him up.
"You are, sometimes. He isn't, you do. Now calm down, and go talk to him." y/n said, patting him on the back.
"Oh thanks, you're such a great help. You're so good at cheering people up."
"Hey, stop being such a sarcastic bitch. It clearly worked, you're practically back to normal. Now go!"
Tony practically ran out of the room. Then stopped in the hallway, rethinking. 'I don't even know where he is.' "JARVIS, where is Cap?"
"He's in the training room. He's about to finish up his work out and head for the showers, I'd hurry if I were you" the AI responded.
"Thanks JARVIS!" Tony ran off to the elevator.
Tony muttered to the elevator. "C'mon, go faster." Finally, he reached the training room door, and completely slowed down. 'Oh my god what am I doing? He's probably changed his mind by now. Realized that I'm an idiot.' Tony took a deep breath. 'Better late than never. It's not like I'll ever find out if I don't do this now.' He walked in.
'Fuck.' Steve was still working out. He was with his back to Tony, and he was shirtless. 'Fuck, again.'
"H-hey." 'smooth, real smooth.' "Can we talk?" 'real specific Tony, even better.'
Steve stopped doing what he was doing and turned around. "Tony?" 'Was that shock? He's surprised I dare to even talk to him, no doubt.' Steve chuckled. "I thought you hated me."
"No." 'Never.' Tony walked up to Steve. 'Am I really going to do this? This is such a bad idea. I should just leave.' Then, Tony was kissing Steve.
Chapter 4: Steve's POV
A little bit of a "rewind" to let us know what's going through Steve's mind
"Hey, can we talk about something?" came a voice from behind him. 'Tony? Yeah, right, of course it's not Tony, I just want it to be.'
Steve put down the weights he had been using and turned around. "Tony?" 'Oh my god. It really is. Why is he here though? He bitterly laughed to himself. 'I'm getting my hopes up for nothing, y/n probably made him come talk to me.' "I thought you hated me."
"No." 'What? But he said that he hated me. Why would he say that? I did say that I hate him, and I really don't, but why is he...' Then, Tony was kissing him. 'Oh my god. Am I dreaming, I've got to be dreaming. This isn't happening. I'm asleep, this is a dream. Just please, don't wake me up.' The only thing that stopped him from kissing back, was Tony. Tony broke away from him, hurt written all over his face as he stepped back.
Chapter 5: Tony's POV
Tony stepped back from Steve. 'Of course he doesn't like me back. He's had enough time to realize that I'm not worth it. I should leave.'
He turned around and made for the door. "Wait!" yelled Steve. 'So you can make it clear that there's no hard feelings? That I'm too late, that you don't care? I don't think so.' He kept walking. At least, he tried to.
All of a sudden he was a lot closer to the floor than he remembered being, and there was something very heavy on his back. 'What the fuck? Oh. He tackled me.'
"What the hell Steve?! Just let me leave already. You don't need to make it clear that you don't like me back." Tony started squirming, but found he couldn't move much more than propping himself up on his elbows. He sunk back to the ground in defeat. "It's not that bad anyway. You're too good for me. It's probably better for both of us, no. Better for you to not be in a relationship with me or something like that. I'll fuck everything up anyways."
"Language." Said Steve.
"Of all times, you choose now to make a joke? What the hell!? Let me go!" Instead of being let go, Tony was turned on his back, letting him look at that gorgeous face. 'Fuck, stop thinking like that. Let it go. He doesn't care.'
"I'm not going to let you leave. I'm going to say some things first. Then I'll let you go." Steve said with a mysterious tone to his voice. 'Fuck, it's hot when he does that.' "You're right, I don't need to make it clear that I don't like you back. Because I do. It's not better for me to not be with you (Steve flushed a little at saying that) because I care for you, and it would hurt me to know that this is mutual and I'm not with you. You won't fuck everything up. I know that." Steve paused and got off of Tony. "I just needed to say that, you can leave now." 'You do... oh my god Steve....'
"I'm not leaving." Tony pulled Steve back down onto him, and kissed him again. This time, Steve kissed back and it was amazing. Steve's lips were slightly chapped, but they were perfect, because they were Steve's lips. Finally, Steve's lips. "I've waited too long for this." Tony muttered against Steve. He lightly grazed his teeth over Steve's bottom lip and was rewarded with a very quiet, but beautiful gasp. Taking that as an advantage, he was about to slip his tongue into Steve's mouth, when...
"Finally. Took you two long enough." Came a voice. 'Shit. Who's that?' Tony and Steve stopped kissing.
"I agree. Seriously though, get a room you two." Came another. 'That's y/n. Fuck.'
Steve and Tony both looked up to see y/n and Tasha standing over them. Steve immediately turned bright pink. 'That's cute, I need to make him blush more often...' Grumbling, Tony shoved Cap a little to make him stand up and then stood up as well. "Cockblockers" he muttered, pulling Steve by the hand to find someplace that they wouldn't be disturbed. 'Someplace with lube...'
"Want to go to my room?" Tony said, grinning like a kid that had just been granted unlimited access to a candy store.