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The Horror Of My Love For You

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"Why aren't you proud of me?" I whimper. I take a step closer, and you cower in the corner and cover your face with your forearms. "Why are you shaking so? You should be happy. I thought I did well... Didn't I do well?"

You scream and scrunch up into a tight ball. "Keep away from me! Get away! You're crazy!"

I start to cry, the tears scorching languid and thick like muddy acid as they drip down my sandy cheeks. I fall to my knees and drop the last body shrouded in soiled sand. "Why are you so afraid of me? I would never hurt you, Naruto; I love you. Don't you see? I did all this because I love you. I love you!"

You're everything to me. I need to have you with me always; without you, I'd crumble into dusty sand and ruin the Earth with my crimson poison. I want you like obese people want food, like poor people want water, like rich people want money and fame. I crave your flesh and heart and soul like addicts crave tobacco and alcohol and cocaine. You are my entire world, my purpose, my sweet, sweet soul mate…

Can't you understand that? Because I thought you understood me. After all, you have a monster within you, too. We match.

But no. You are sobbing and pathetically attempting to flee. I get up and chase after you, my feet heavy as lead and my clothes splattering droplets of blood as I move. I lick my lips – metallic and warm and salty from gore – and I beg you to wait. I beg you to stay.

"Come back, Naruto!"

"No, no! Please, just leave me be, you… you murderer!"

I stop dead in my tracks. You hurt me so much, but I can't hate you for it. "But I thought you knew that already. Is that what bothers you? I can change! I swear, I won't do it again! Just let me love you…"

"No!" you scream, and when you trip on an amputated limb as you enter the forest surrounding Konoha, you fall and scrape your knee. I catch up to you, standing darkly above you as the sun sets and casts my shadow across the grassy knoll. I bend over to cradle you in my arms. You resist me, but I hold you tightly until you cease the fighting and submit to my strength. "Please… don't kill me, Gaara," you whisper, hoarse and frail.

"Kill you?" I laugh, and peck you on the nose with my bloody lips. "I would never! I just wanted you to see how much I love you. Look," I say, and nod my head in the direction of the slaughtered village before us. "I killed all of the people who mocked and tormented and ignored you. Aren't you happy that they won't hurt you anymore?"

It's beautiful; the sun is setting orange, casting palely brown shadows across the pools of shiny-red bodily fluids. There are faces frozen in horror with staring, blank eyes and gaping mouths. They look like pretty little dolls, broken and scattered and painted vibrant shades of crimson with sparkling, gritty sand sprinkled on top.

"Don't you like it? It's a painting. I painted the town red for you."

Well, this is a little bit of a lie. I also slaughtered them because I couldn't let them have you, look at you, touch you, call you names, hurt you. None of them deserve you. You're too pure and soft and lovely for them all, even if you contain the Kyuubi inside of you. I'm not much better, but I could take care of you. If you let me.

"We can have picnics in the graveyard, among all their tombstones. We can swim in the bloody lake in the moonlight, and sing sweet songs of lust and possession. I'll sing them to you, and you can smile and laugh and I can take pictures of you, and then we can print them out and keep them forever."

You shake your head and cry, weak and frightened and unsure. Why are you being this way? I thought you liked me. What happened to the joyous times during the Chuunin exams? Why aren't you smiling? I'm smiling. I'm smiling so broad, because you're here and you're in my grasp and you feel so wonderful that I never want to let you go. We're only twelve years old, but I think I know what love is now. It's this: proximity and protection.

"I'll protect you from the world, Naruto. It can be only you and me and no one else; I'll kill them. I'll kill them all, just for you…"

I stroke your face, leaving trails of glimmering red. You look so beautiful when you're covered in blood. I lick your lips. "Kiss me. Let's become one. I want to merge with you, body and soul. Please, be reasonable. We'll be so perfect together."

I want to crawl inside you, clawing my way into the perfect burrow and sleeping for an eternity. I want to feel you from the inside out, I want to sink my teeth into your flesh and taste your supple, forbidden flavor. But I won't hurt you, no. I will be gentle with you, I promise. But things might get a little rough when I start to grind against you, our bones clashing until our marrows mix together and we become like Siamese twins: inseparable.

You grow quiet. Your eyes flutter closed and you turn your head from me. You've fainted, so I pick you up and carry you, your body lighter than I thought. You're like a little bird, pretty and lightweight and carefree, but caged. I have you caged, right where I want you. I need you to stay; you can never leave. You're my little blond beauty, tan and toned and perfect. And I finally get to have you.

And despite being taken hostage, I think you'll be okay with it over time. You'll be okay with it because I know, deep down inside, you do love me. And part of you loves the gore, too, because aren't you a monster inside just like me…?