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I'm The Kind Of Human Wreckage That You Love

Chapter Text

Translated into Chinese here amd here . Possible Translations into Spanish, French and Russian coming soon!



John left the flat hating himself more than he ever had in his entire life. He headed straight for the pub, ready to drink away his sorrows. He wanted to drink himself into a stupor until he forgot this whole rotten night. It seemed like the best course of action considering the circumstances.

He couldn't believe he had been so bloody stupid. Kissing Sherlock had to be one of the biggest blunders of his life. It was made even worse by the fact that Sherlock had turned him down flat, not even bothering to return the kiss. In fact Sherlock's exact words before he disappeared into his room were "not interested." That was all John got of a rejection, two words mumbled with indifference. He thought after the relationship they'd built over the past year, he deserved more than that. He deserved a conversation. 

Now he just wanted to drink, pass out and forget all about his flat-mate who he had stupidly fallen in love with. The best case scenario was that this wouldn't ruin everything. Sherlock probably wouldn't care that John was in love with him, so it was up to John not to cock this up. As long as he pretended everything was fine, things wouldn't change between them. He just needed to make his feelings go away.

It was going to be a slow process but his relationship or lack thereof with Sherlock was worth it. They needed each other, John knew that much. Even if it would never turn into anything more, he needed Sherlock and the adventure his lifestyle provided. He would go mad if he didn't have excitement in his life, which Sherlock provided in spades. So John would just have to suck it up and deal with it in the only way he knew how, getting pissed.


Jim Moriarty didn't often feel lonely. After all, there were almost always people around and he was usually too busy to concern himself with being lonely. It was rarer still that he craved human interaction. Most people he found tedious and dull and could hardly stand to be in someone's presence for an extended period of time. But still, when there was a lull in his work, Jim found himself in need of a night out, realizing what a solitary life he led.

He'd managed to call off Moran for the evening and excused his security detail. He didn't want someone from his employ hanging around. This was much too human a need for the Consulting Criminal and he didn't want to show weakness in front of his employees. He preferred to keep his employees in a constant state of terror simply so they wouldn't cross him. Well, that and he enjoyed it. 

When he got to the pub, he wasn't sure if he was there to shag someone or murder them. The night really could go either way. He walked in wearing jeans and a t-shirt, dressing down to seem less intimidating. People were always underestimating him and they had done his entire life. Jim loved showing them just how wrong they were, taking great pleasure in it. He sat down at the bar and ordered a pint of bitter, scanning the room for someone interesting.

His blood ran cold when his eyes settled on the unassuming army doctor sitting alone in a corner booth. Jim struggled with himself for a moment, wondering what the best course of action was. He had come here to forget being James Moriarty and just be Jim for one night. Going up to John would certainly negate that, no matter how much he wanted to go over and mess with the man's head. Besides, he was completely on his own, no Moran, no backup. He wasn't entirely defenseless, but he liked to be holding all the cards. 

He took a moment to appraise the man. Their last encounter at the pool had been brief and Jim had been focused on Sherlock. Now he took his time looking over the doctor. He was almost the same height as Jim. His sandy blond hair had patches of gray in it. His eyes were a bright blue with deep bags underneath. The poor bloke looked even more rundown than usual. Jim thought over what he currently had ongoing but couldn't think of anything Sherlock would concern himself with. It was mostly higher up political stuff, much more Mycroft's area. If Sherlock was running John ragged, it had nothing to do with Jim.

He had been staring so long and had been lost in his own thoughts that he hadn't noticed John staring back. Jim turned his face away, hoping John hadn't recognized him but knowing it was futile. Jim turned back to see if John was calling Sherlock or the police. John, in fact, was not doing a thing other than drinking his pint. Jim swore he saw a flicker of understanding cross over the army doctor's face. Jim grinned and raised his pint, giving John a slight nod. To his surprise, John also raised his glass and they both drank.


John had no idea how it had gotten to this point. One minute he was drinking alone – wallowing in self-pity and ready to spin into a fit of depression – the next he had locked eyes with Moriarty. Just when he was thinking his night couldn't get any worse, James bloody Moriarty had to stroll into his pub. The criminal mastermind was wearing jeans and a t-shirt, which oddly looked good on him. He looked normal compared to the last time John had seen him. It was probably just a way to make people underestimate him so he could kill them easily or something.

But now they were crashing through the back door of the pub, biting and sucking at each other's lips, tearing at the other's clothes. Jim's stubble was rubbing against John as they attacked each other's mouths. Jim wrenched John's head back by his hair and bit at his neck, breaking the skin.

"Fuck!" John cried out and pushed Jim against the brick wall in the alley. Jim smirked before John kissed the expression off of him. He pinned the Consulting Criminal's hands up above his head and pressed their bodies together.

"A tryst in a dark alleyway. Bit cliché, don't you think Doctor?" Jim remarked snidely.

"It was either this or the loo." John shrugged, unashamedly rubbing his raging hard-on against the other man's, making them both groan. John let Jim's hands free, needing to be touched.

"You surprise me Doctor, this is not the outcome I was expecting when you saw me." Jim confessed, raking his fingers through John's hair, fingernails scratching his scalp.

"Maybe I feel like doing something stupid." John growled, reaching down and undoing Jim's jeans.

"I didn't know you were capable of doing anything smart." Jim joked.

John rolled his eyes to keep from confirming that lately, he had done an extraordinary amount of idiotic things, top of the list being falling in love with an extremely unavailable mad genius. So instead he was going to fuck a different mad genius, one who had tried to kill him. Excellent Watson, that's using your head, he thought bitterly. Instead he put his hand on the wall behind Jim's head, pressed his body in and cupped the man through his underwear. He formed his mouth against Moriarty and kissed him deeply, rubbing him roughly against his palm. Jim all but melted against him, hands clutching his jacket to keep him close.

"Come on pet, are we just going to tease each other all day or are we actually going to play?" Jim asked staring at him with his cold, calculating eyes burning with lust.

John reached up and tweaked one of Jim's nipples through his shirt, making him buck against John in surprise. "I'll fuck you when I'm good and ready." John replied, attaching himself to Moriarty's neck and sucking his pale skin hard. Moriarty's hands were back in his hair, trying to pull him off but he simply bit down harder and slammed his body against Jim's, crushing him against the wall.

"Johnny." Moriarty groaned, rolling his hips so their erections slid against each other again, even if it was through layers of fabric. "Come on already, fuck me."

"Fine." John grumbled, dislodging from Jim's neck. He undid his own jeans, pushing them down with his pants to free his erection. Then he gripped Jim's shoulders and forced him down until he was kneeling in front of him.

"I thought you were going to fuck me." Jim pouted, gazing up at John.

"Do you have lubricant because I certainly don't?"


"Then you better get my cock nice and wet or you get nothing." John snapped, fisting his hand into Jim's hair and shoving him towards John's prick. Jim grinned at him for a moment and then moved closer, licking the underside of John's cock starting at the base. He was going slowly, so slowly that John wondered if he was ever going to reach the tip.

Jim did the same with the sides and the top, going tantalizingly slow and John was biting on his lips to keep from making too much noise. He was shivering in anticipation and just wanted mouth surrounding his cock. He rolled his hips forward to communicate what he wanted. Jim kept teasing him with his tongue, swirling it around the head of his cock but not taking it into his mouth. John was growling in frustration and was ready to pull Moriarty up and just fuck him when finally Jim took him into his mouth, sucking hard on the end of his cock while his vision went blurry.

He worked John's prick just as slowly, keeping his eyes fixated on John's, which was both unnerving and unbelievably hot. His long pulls had just the right hint of teeth, his tongue continued working against the underside, Jim's nails digging into the backs of his thighs.

"Get off." John snarled when he was much too close to coming. Jim was smiling triumphantly as he rose to his feet. John pulled down Jim's jeans and underwear enough that his ass was bare and his cock was out. He hoisted Jim up against the wall and the criminal seemed to get the idea. He wrapped his legs around John's middle, throwing one arm around John's neck the other hand holding on to a brick that was jutting out over his head.

John didn't bother being nice, he figured Moriarty didn't really deserve it. Instead he felt his cock pressed against Jim's entrance and shoved himself in with one go. Jim cried out in a mix of pleasure-pain and clung to John a bit tighter. John rammed into him relentlessly as Jim gasped, pinned against the wall with nowhere to go and no other option than to take John's cock as fast and as hard as John wanted.

This didn't seem to deter Jim at all. He tilted his hips up so John would hit his prostate. John wasn't surprised Moriarty liked it a bit rough - not that he'd put much thought into how the Consulting Criminal liked to take it up the arse -although he was shocked with how much he was enjoying it. He had always considered himself a gentle and considerate lover. He'd never fucked anyone like this before. He was drunk on the power of it and the sight of Moriarty somewhat helpless above him, needing his cock and taking what John gave him without complaint.

Moriarty was so tight and John was slamming into him so fast that he knew this wouldn't last long. Then again they were in a dirty alley where anyone could walk by and see them. He didn't really want to extend the process. Jim was making all kinds of noise that was certain to attract attention if they didn't finish this soon.

John lifted Jim's shirt to reveal one of his tiny pink nipples. John sucked it into his mouth and bit at it. Jim seemed overly sensitive there because he jumped from the sensation. John continued to suck on it, eliciting a loud moan. Moriarty's cock was trapped between them and so far neither of them had paid it any attention. Jim couldn't let go of the wall or John without risking a fall and John couldn't let go without dropping him. That's why it came as quite a shock when Moriarty threw his head back and came, spilling himself all over John's shirt.

Moriarty's body clenched around John's cock as he continued to thrust into him. He was so close and Jim was so tight and hot, the pressure on his cock almost unbearable. Moriarty looked ready to drop so it was good that it didn't take John long to finish. With a few final thrusts, he came, biting down on the nipple still in his mouth and making Moriarty shriek in pain.

John rode out the end of his orgasm, emptying himself inside the criminal mastermind. When he was finished, he slowly dropped Jim down and leaned against him to make sure he didn't collapse but also to prop himself up. For a moment they panted into to each other's ears, trying to get their breath back.

John broke away first, pulled up his trousers and fastened them quickly. He looked around for a moment but it seemed that no one had caught them, which he was thankful for. He looked down at the sticky mess of Moriarty's come all over him and sighed. He slipped out of his jacket, pulled off his jumper, walked over and tossed it into the skip behind the pub. He put his jacket back on and shivered from the loss of a layer. Jim was still leaning against the wall, looking somewhat dazed. John bit his lip to keep from laughing. He'd never for the life of him thought he'd see the most dangerous man in London looking so thoroughly fucked. "Well, thanks for that." John shrugged, not sure what to do now. He gave Moriarty a quick kiss on the lips before shoving his hands in his jacket pockets and heading home.


Jim, unable to remain on his feet, slid down the wall and sat on the floor. He hissed in pain as he put pressure on his slightly worse for wear hole. He raked his hand through his hair, trying to gain some composure. What the fuck had that been? It was like getting caught in a John Watson tornado and Jim could only hold on and ride it out.

Jim could feel John's come leaking out of his hole and Christ his cock was still out. It took a few tries but he finally got to his feet, pulling up his jeans and closing them. He leaned against the wall, his legs shaking beneath him. Well, wasn't John Watson just full of surprises? It was no wonder Sherlock liked having him around. When Jim had finally caught his breath and was able to move, he left the alley and called a car to come pick him up.

The moment he arrived home, he went and hacked into the pentagon to see what the silly Americans were up to. It was hardly a distraction and images of John Watson, just bare enough to fuck Jim senseless kept dancing into his head. He messed up a secret project just for fun and then retired to his room. He stripped naked in front of his full-length mirror and inspected the damage.

The first thing he noticed was the large purple mark on his neck. He tilted his head back and ran his fingers over it, remembering the heat of John's mouth against his skin. He could still taste John on his tongue, the mixture of beer, sweat, precome and something that was just John's natural taste. On continued inspection, his hair was messily tousled and his lips were still red. He had scratch marks on his back from where the bricks had dug into his skin. There was some dried semen on the back of his thigh from where more had spilled out of his hole. He'd have to take a shower and clean himself up.

As he glanced at the debauched mess of a man, there seemed to be nothing left of the hardened criminal Moriarty, there was just Jim who liked it rough and dirty in alleyways. For some reason, he found himself liking this version. He was calmer than he had been in months and he knew he'd finally get a good night's sleep. He grinned at his reflection before turning away and heading towards the shower. He was focused on one very clear goal as the steaming water poured over his abused body; he needed John Watson to fuck him again.