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“Who the fuck drank the last of the coffee without puttin’ on a new pot?”

Bucky expects to hear a quick circle of ‘wasn’t me’ or perhaps the sound of protest from someone as they were pointed out. He wasn’t expecting to hear gasps followed by giggling.

He raises his eyebrows towards Tony and Clint who both have their hands over their mouths and their gazes directed at Steve. Nat smirks and you can practically hear her eyes roll.

“It’s not funny. It’s a dick move, that’s what it is.” Bucky begins to turn his attention back to the coffee machine to fill it up but more laughter – louder this time – has him banging the pot on the counter and marching across the kitchen to the table where half the Avengers are sat. “The fuck is your problem?”

“Steve! He did it again!” giggles Clint and he’s really trying hard to suppress the shit-eating grin spreading across his face.

“It’s alright, Buck, they’re laughing at me.” Steve doesn’t even look up from his newspaper as he speaks – he just brings his coffee mug up to his mouth and sips (the bastard probably didn’t refill the pot after he poured that).

“Am I missing out on another fantastic inside Avenger joke?” Bucky can’t tell if he meant to say that bitterly or mockingly. Either way is fine, he supposes – he’s always missing out on stuff and no Avenger’s joke is all that good so both fits.

“Rogers doesn’t like swearing” says Natasha as if that explains anything.

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

Tony really can’t keep from laughing as he points at Bucky and says “He used bad language! Tell him off, Steve” in the way a child would report something bad to a teacher.

“Yeah, Barnes, mind your language” smirks Clint. He turns to Steve and waits for the disapproving scorn to be directed at Bucky which, of course, will never happen.

“You’re trying to tell me that Steve ‘Don’t-Tell-Me-What-To-Do’ Rogers, is telling you guys off for cussing? The guy is worse than I am unless he’s in front of my mother.”

“Well he told me off for saying a bad word once.”

“And they aren’t letting me live it down” smiles Steve. He looks up at Bucky and God, he could just kiss that dopey grin right off his face.

“Although everyone knows that Captain America doesn’t cuss. Stop shattering my perfect image of the all-American-hero” Tony all but pouts.

Bucky rolls his eyes for what feels like the millionth time in fifteen minutes and finally commences getting himself some coffee. He can feel Steve walk behind him and Bucky gives him a side-glare as watches him place his used coffee mug in the sink. The dazzling smile and kiss on the shoulder Steve gives him before he leaves the room doesn’t have Bucky narrowing his eyes any less – he knows Steve’s the one who finished all the coffee. Bastard.

––

Three weeks later, they’re holed up in an old safe house in Poland after completing their most recent mission. It was nothing too tricky; just the takedown of what should be the last of the Hydra agents in that area. It took less than ninety minutes to complete since Nat lead the mission and her preferred tactic is “get in and get out without making a noise and we’ll be home in time for American Idol”. But she didn’t account for any turns in the weather so now they’re stuck in a tiny Polish house until morning and Nat is going to miss her shows.

Bucky is laying on his back with his hands perched on his stomach, staring up at the ceiling when Steve comes in after using the bathroom. The house they’re sheltering in belongs to a contact of SHIELD – they have handfuls of them across Europe who at first notice will vacate and lend it to any agent that requires so. Bucky likes this one; it actually feels lived in compared to the last one which felt cold and unwelcoming like it’s only ever purpose was to be empty when needed.

“You gonna shower?” says Steve as he sits on the edge of the bed, tugging on a clean t-shirt.

“Nah, I’m good.”

“You’re gross.” Steve reaches out and runs his hand through Bucky’s long, knotted hair and exaggerates a look of disgust. He places his hand on Bucky’s face and laughs “look how gross your hair is. My hand is filthy now.”

“Shut up, I’m not that dirty.” Bucky can’t help but laugh while he slaps Steve’s hand away.

They fall into a comfortable silence for a few minutes after Steve lays down along side Bucky. The weight of completing a mission, any mission, always has them both quiet but they always share in each other’s company as they silently become lost in thought.

After a few minutes Bucky sighs before speaking. “It’s like they don’t even know you…”

Steve’s eyebrows furrow in confusion and he turns his head towards Bucky. “Is there a first half of that conversation or are you just talkin’ to yourself?”

“Sorry…” Bucky turns to lay on his side so he’s completely facing Steve – curled up in his personal space. “Twice today, Clint told me to watch my language ‘cause we can’t have you hearin’ any bad words.”

“You’re still stuck on that?”

“Yeah. It’s like they don’t even know you. Your language can get fuckin’ filthy.”

Steve fakes a gasp and nudges the other man’s shoulder. “James Buchanan Barnes, how dare you use such appalling language.”

Bucky isn’t laughing though, instead his eyebrows knot further together.

“Sorry, Buck. What’s this really about though? You know they’re just teasin’.”

Bucky shrugs and rolls again onto his back. He doesn’t speak for a minute and Steve knows to wait until he does. Even before he became the Winter Soldier, Bucky had a hard time expressing himself.

“So much has changed. Everythin’ about this century is new and shiny and nothing’s the same. The Winter Soldier never cared, he just adapted but I care and I’m…” Bucky feels Steve press a kiss onto his shoulder – his left shoulder – as if he were encouraging him to continue. “… it’s just hard sometimes. But it doesn’t always matter because you’re here and you’re the same. You ain’t changed and I can’t put into words how great that is. But the entire world has this image of you and it ain’t right. Your friends think of you as some innocent old man who cowers from the word ‘fuck’ and that ain’t you. I need you to be you ‘cause you ain’t changed…” Bucky shrugs again, trying to lighten the weight of his speech.

“Buck, people have always had a preconceived image of me. When I was skinny they would think I’d be quiet and weak and now that I’m Captain America, they like to think I’m the perfect American who never does anything wrong. That’s just how it’s always been, don’t mean they’re right.”

“Yeah but when you were skinny and people’d think you were weak, you’d shove them into an alley and try’n prove them wrong.”

Steve laughs at the memory. “Only ‘cause I knew I had you to get me out of trouble.” He presses his lips together, the corner of his lips curve into a smile. “Things have changed, Buck. And yeah, people expect Captain America to be something that I’m probably not but that’s only ‘cause they never knew the five foot four kid from Brooklyn.”

“So you ain’t bothered that people make assumptions?”

“Fuck ‘em” answers Steve simply and with a shrug. A huge grin breaks out across his face. And yeah, Steve hasn’t changed. His eyes light up the same and his smile reaches across to his ears the same and he knows Bucky inside out the same. Bucky fucking loves him the same.

Bucky lets out a huff of laughter and rolls back to his side. His right arm snakes over Steve’s waist and he pulls him in closer to his body. “And what if I made an assumption about you?” He leans in and presses a trail of kisses from Steve’s shoulder up to his neck, causing him to release a quiet moan. “What if I made the assumption that you’re a shy, virginal ninety-five year old who never let a single ‘fuck’ pass your lips?” The way Steve exposes his neck has Bucky pressing his lips to his skin a little harder – involving his teeth for good measure. “What would you do?”

Steve reaches to grab Bucky’s hips so he can pull their bodies tighter together. There’s not a millimeter of space left between them now but Steve needs to be closer so he rolls Bucky over onto his back then follows him, allowing gravity to pull their bodies flush together. All the while, Bucky’s mouth hasn’t left Steve’s neck and he continues to explore up his throat and along his jaw, making sure to trace the contours with his tongue and mark the pale skin with his teeth.

Bucky’s hands travel along the sides of Steve’s body until he’s framing his face, moving it to allow him to look up into Steve’s eyes. “You still haven’t answered my question” he says before he moves once again, this time catching Steve’s earlobe between his front teeth. “What would you do, Stevie?”

With closed eyes and a slack jaw, Steve replies “I’d prove you wrong.”

Steve’s hand move to splay out on the bed either side of Bucky’s head at the same time as he rocks up a little to allow him to separate his legs and straddle Bucky’s hips. He leans to plant a slow kiss to Bucky’s lips, keeping in time with the agonizingly slow rotation of his hips. There’s the faintest echo of a moan and Bucky has no idea if it came from himself or Steve but all he knows is if things don’t speed up soon, he may die.

Before Steve knows it, Bucky has flipped them over and he has little time to settle into his new position as Bucky immediately begins kissing him deeply.

Steve tastes so good. Bucky can’t even begin to describe his taste but it’s heavenly. Their kisses become rougher and their lips may bruise but each time they separate for a second to heavily exhale and tip their faces to opposite sides they dive straight back in again.

Bucky can’t keep track of his own hands. They’ve touched nearly every inch of Steve’s body and while usually he’d be so careful, so gentle, with his left hand, now he can’t help but relish in the sounds that escape Steve’s lips each time he digs the metal of his fingertips into the other man’s flesh. So he lets himself forget his own strength – just a little – because Steve’s hand is covering his own where he’s holding his thigh and he’s encouraging Bucky to tighten his grip.

Bucky raises Steve’s leg to wrap around his waist, giving him more leverage to roll his hips down to meet each thrust Steve makes. He can feel Steve fully hard inside his sweatpants and every time he meets it with his own fully hard cock, Steve’s mouth goes slack against his and a moan gets caught in his throat.

Bucky moves his mouth to Steve’s exposed throat and runs his tongue along it, tasting the sweat that’s starting to build up. He continues to move south down Steve’s body at the same as pushing up the hem of his t-shirt so that when he reaches Steve’s stomach, he’s presented with bare skin. Steve moans at the loss of contact on his dick but gasps at the contact on his nipple when Bucky crawls up and covers it with his mouth.

“Shit, Buck…” pants Steve and he arches his back at the pleasure shivering down his spine.

The laugh that escapes Bucky vibrates through Steve’s nipple causing him to moan again. “I’m sorry…” teases Bucky “but did Captain America just say a cuss word?” He smirks against Steve’s chest and runs his finger up to trace each rib before stopping at Steve’s other nipple to pinch it between his thumb and forefinger.

“F–fuck you, Barnes. Oh… oh god, please… more.”

Bucky removes his hand and holds up two fingers “that’s twice now”. He then slides down Steve’s body and stops once he reaches the waistband of his sweats. “Let’s see how many more we can get out of you, shall we?” he asks coolly and Steve lifts his hips up a fraction, asking for contact. “Take your shirt off the rest of the way.”

Steve sits up and hastily removes his t-shirt that has bunched up under his armpits before throwing it across the small room. He collapses back and moves to run a hand through Bucky’s hair. Bucky closes his eyes and tips his head to meet Steve’s grip – he loves having his hair played with and it’s the only reason he hasn’t had it cut. He can deal with still looking like the Winter Soldier if it means Steve has something to grab on to (well, that and Natasha is really good at braiding).

With Steve’s hand still tangled in his hair, Bucky dips his tongue into the waistband of the other man’s sweatpants. He can feel Steve’s dick twitch against his chest as he teases his hipbones and his own dick twitches in response to the breathy moans being exhaled above him. Bucky loves how Steve is pretty much putty in his hands when he has him like this. The only time Steve will lay boneless and willing is when Bucky takes him apart with his mouth – any other time and he’s cocky, spunky, and a smart-mouth with too much fight that lives to keep Bucky on his toes. So when Bucky has him laid out on his back to do whatever he wants – he likes to make it last.

He buries his hands in the fabric of Steve’s sweats and begins to ever so slowly pull them down, chasing the waistband with his mouth as they descend. Once they reach his knees, Bucky pulls them completely the way off in one go and feathers kisses up and along the inside of Steve’s thighs. He makes sure to avoid his groin, instead hopping over to the other thigh and repeating the process until Steve gets unbearably fidgety each time he reaches the top.

“Bucky… please…” Bucky licks a stripe up the underside of Steve’s cock “Fuck!”

“That’s three” Bucky winks before taking pity and swallows Steve down wholly.

“Ah– shit.” Steve’s moans are no more than a whimper that are just about audible. He throws his head back with his eyes screwed shut and sinks into the pleasure being elicited by Bucky’s mouth. He can feel the wet heat of Bucky’s tongue as it explores every inch of his dick – it’s movement is agonizingly slow and he thrusts his hips up to hint at his need but Bucky lays his left arm across his waist that holds him down. The cool metal of his arm makes Steve gasp and he can hear the mechanics rev as Bucky applies more weight to keep him from moving.

Steve all but whines when Bucky removes his mouth, only then to have him inhale sharply when he runs his tongue against his hole. Still with his arm across Steve to hold him still, Bucky shifts his weight so that he can push Steve’s legs further apart before he spreads his ass and delivers to him a few broad, flat licks. It’s at this point now, when Steve loses all his submissiveness and he’s once again the impatient little shit Bucky adores.

Bucky removes his arm from across Steve because, let’s face it, you can’t beat having Steve Rogers freely squirm and grind with your tongue in his ass. Bucky shifts again so that he’s laying flat against the bed; he’s distracted for a few seconds by the ability to relive some of his own tension by pressing his pulsing cock down against the mattress. It’s when Steve grabs two handfuls of his hair that he remembers the job at hand. Now spreading Steve apart using both hands, Bucky is able to easily access his hole and he dives straight in.

“Fuck! Bucky… awh shit” cries Steve once Bucky’s tongue breaches his rim and he uses the hold he has on Bucky’s hair to further spread his legs and sink down to meet his tongue each time it fucks into his body. “Please– Bucky, please… use your fingers too– ah fuck!”

Bucky pulls away enough so that he’s able to reply. “I don’t wanna hurt you, baby, I didn’t bring any lube.” Bucky cursed himself the moment he began sucking on Steve’s neck – he knew it would lead to this, it always does, and he had to go and do it when they were halfway across the world after finishing a mission, without any lubricant.

“Duffel bag. I have some. Go. Now.”

Bucky raises his eyebrows up at the other man. “Were you expectin’ to get lucky when you packed for the mission?”

“You’re predictable, that’s all. And I knew you wouldn’t be able to resist me if we got the chance to be alone.” The grin on Steve’s face followed by a wink is downright sinful and Bucky continues to grind into the mattress. “Now fucking move and get it before I finish myself.”

“You wouldn’t.”

“Wanna try me, Barnes?” Steve moves his right hand to his cock and immediately begins pumping himself. He’s already leaking onto his stomach and Bucky doesn’t doubt that Steve would come by himself if he didn’t move fast enough.

He dashes to stand up, removing the clothes he’s for some reason still wearing before moving across the room in two long strides to where Steve threw his duffel earlier. It doesn’t take long to find the two pouches of lube in one of the side pockets and when he turns around his eyes fall hard on Steve. Bucky’s almost tempted to let him finish himself off, the show would be incredible.

Steve’s stretched out with one leg flat on the mattress and another slightly bent at the knee, giving Bucky full view of his hand moving over himself. His chest is flushed pink down past his nipples and, with his back arched like it is, they’re just asking to have a mouth around them. Bucky can see every muscle in his body move and he can’t tear his gaze away from his stomach – how the muscles there tense with every stroke of his hand.

“Enjoying the show? ‘Cause I’d– ah, fuck. I’d really like to come with your dick in me.” Steve turns his head to the side so that he’s watching Bucky; his eyebrows are furrowed and his mouth hangs open from where he hasn’t stopped touching himself and the pleasure is obviously building.

Bucky moves quickly across the room and lands himself in between Steve’s legs where he grabs his wrists – taking his right hand away from his cock – and shoves them down above his head. He smashes their lips together and roughly kisses him, delving his tongue into his mouth so that Steve can taste himself from where Bucky had been eating him out.

Bucky wastes no time in sitting back on his calves and ripping open one of the packets of lube with his teeth. He coats his fingers generously and moves his hand down to Steve’s ass. He waits for a while until Steve is shifting on the bed, desperately hunting for Bucky’s fingers which he moves away whenever he’s close.

“Buck, please” Steve says in an exasperated sigh.

Bucky smirks before placing his left hand on Steve’s stomach to still him – he then circles a finger around Steve’s hole, only teasing for a second until he breaches the rim and slowly pushes it inside.

He keeps his pace slow, admiring Steve’s pained expression and the way he tries to circle his hips, begging Bucky to move faster. But he doesn’t speed up. Instead, after a few more seconds, he enters a second finger just as leisurely.

“Come on! Fuck… please, Bucky. I need it faster.”

“You want it faster?” teases Bucky. He leans down a little and places a soft kiss to Steve’s bent knee. The sound of Steve’s sighs fill the room and Bucky’s eyes fall closed to listen to them. He could listen to the noises Steve makes forever.

Back in Brooklyn when they weren’t super soldiers but just two normal best friends, Bucky would lay awake when Steve thought he was sleeping and listen to the sounds he made when he jerked off. It wasn’t all that odd of a thing to do – they both needed release and for a while they would dance around each other; someone would do it quickly while the other was out, or someone would procrastinate in the bathroom while the other jerks off in their bedroom. But at some point, neither of them cared enough to hide it. It was, however, odd to listen and enjoy it. Which Bucky very much did. And because they were both idiots who were secretly in love with each other, eventually they fell into sessions of mutual masturbation, which turned into touching each other, which then turned into sex and after months of stubborn repression they finally admitted their feelings towards each other and things were good. Then Bucky got shipped off to war.

But now Bucky is able to pull sinful noises from Steve and listen knowing he’s able to for as long as he wants. That is of course until Steve gets far too impatient and his beautiful sounds of pleasure turn into cries of frustration and he starts trying to fuck himself on Bucky’s fingers.

“You’re a little shit, you know that?” Bucky grins as he pushes a third finger in up to his knuckles.

“I wouldn’t be if you just– shit. Shit. Ah… if you just hurry up.” Steve’s got one hand in his own hair, tugging on the short blond strands, and another gripping the bed sheets. There’s a pool of pre-come on his belly where his cock is heavy and desperate and finally, Bucky decides to give Steve what he needs.

“How do you want this?” he asks, his voice low, as he plants another kiss to the inside of Steve’s knee.

Without saying a word, Steve shifts to start rolling over on to his stomach and Bucky removes his finger to allow him to do so. In a matter of seconds, Steve is face down with his ass up the in air; all of his weight is on his elbows making the muscles in his arms tense beautifully with the strain.

Bucky can hardly resist leaning forward and burying his face into Steve’s ass which is presented perfectly to him, begging to be eaten out. While he enthusiastically licks and tongue-fucks Steve, his left hand is skirting the bed sheets to look for the remaining lube. It takes him a while to find it since the distraction of Steve screaming into the pillow is a little too strong but once he does he abruptly pulls his face away and slicks up his cock. He revels in the feeling of his hand sliding over himself when he realizes that he’s neglected his own dick throughout the evening. He gets up onto his knees and remedies that.

It doesn’t take much effort to push himself into Steve’s entrance but it does take all his strength not to immediately begin fucking him roughly.

“Oh, fuck…” the words slip from his lips once he’s fully seated inside. “Oh god, Stevie. Fuck… Stevie, you’re so good…”. He hasn’t begun moving yet – he’s afraid to incase he goes off too quickly. The way Steve is purposefully tensing around him has him shaking already.

“What’re you waitin’ for?” Steve starts to rock himself back and forth on his elbows and the movement has them both groaning. “Come on, Buck. Fuck me hard, please…”

Placing both hands on Steve’s hips, Bucky straightens up and begins to pull out painfully slowly until half an inch of him is still inside Steve’s ass before he tightens his grip and slams back into him at full force.

“Fuck!” The air gets almost punched out of Steve’s lungs and his fingers dig into the bed sheets until his knuckles are turning white.

Again, Bucky starts backing off so slowly that Steve is almost sobbing.

“Please, Buck. I’m begging– Ah!” and again, when he fucks back in at speed, Steve cries out.

Bucky picks up his pace after a few more and already he’s aiming each thrust inside Steve where it matters. Bucky’s hair has fallen into his face where his head is lowered at an angle to watch himself fuck into Steve’s ass and he continues to do so at a faster speed after each passing second.

At this point, Steve is just hanging on for the ride. He can feel Bucky’s fingers begin to bruise his hips and the difference in temperature between each of his hands has his leaning to the left so he can feel more from the metal which by now is starting to burn.

As Bucky’s speed increases, so does the rate at which words are spilling from Steve’s mouth. He’s hardly taken a breath between each string of “oh my god. Fuck, Bucky, please. Oh fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” And the volume level rises too.

After a particularly loud cry from Steve, Bucky remembers where they are. They’re in an old safe house in Poland with Nat, Clint, and Sam in the surrounding bedrooms.
Bucky leans forward to lay his back across Steve’s as he reaches out and clamps the other man’s mouth shut with his right hand.

“You’re too loud, Stevie. People might hear you… awh, shit…” Bucky’s voice is at a whisper; his mouth is right next to Steve’s ear. With the volume of cries a little lower, the sounds of skin slapping against skin echo in the room and Bucky has to bite down on Steve’s shoulder to stop from moaning because of it. “Stev– Stevie, we can’t… we can’t have everyone hearing Captain America swearing now, can we? You– ah, god… you got a reputation to uphold.”

Steve knows that Bucky realizes what he’s doing. Because they both know that once you tell Steve not to do something, he’ll damn well go and do it. But neither of them are into exhibitionism so why Bucky would be egging Steve on to start screaming cuss words is unknown.

“However…” Bucky continues. “I know that… fuck, Stevie… I know that you just can’t help yourself… I know exactly how to make you scream…”

Steve cries out from behind Bucky’s hand. He gets it now. He knows Bucky’s game and he can’t… oh god he can’t.

Bucky completely stills and pushes deeper inside Steve so that every millimeter of his body is in contact. He leans in closer and tugs on Steve’s ear with his teeth before he begins speaking again. “…I’m gonna take my hand off your mouth and I’m gonna fuck you just like you’ve been beggin’ me to. And you can’t make a sound and you can’t utter a single cuss because then everyone will have their perfect image of Captain America shattered.”

Because Steve Rogers also finds it impossible to back down from a challenge, when Bucky removes his hands and straightens up again, Steve just can’t help himself from muttering “show me what you got, Barnes.” To which Bucky grins and starts fucking into Steve with no less abandon.

For a while, Steve manages. He manages to bury his face into the pillow and tighten his grip on the sheets until his fingers hurt. But after a while of Bucky’s perfectly aimed thrusts, the grunts and moans begin to flood from his mouth.

“Ah. Ah. I can’t… Bucky… Fuck! Shit. Shit. Shit. I can’t do it…” Although his shouts are muffled by the pillow that he’s screaming into, Steve is loud. God, he’s loud.

And Bucky can’t find the effort to care. While he isn’t doing this on purpose to permanently scar their friends who will most certainly hear at least something, he is allowing himself to bask in the unbelievably gorgeous sounds pouring out of Steve’s mouth.

“Almost there, Stevie… awh, fuck, I’m almost there…”

The way that Steve is writhing uncontrollably on the bed is an indicator that he’s close too. It takes three more seconds of relentless pounding into him that has Steve’s entire body tensing as he comes.

“Fuck, Bucky!... Oh, god. Shit…”

Bucky isn’t far behind. The tightening of Steve’s hole as he’s coming pushes Bucky over the edge and he leans forward to bite down onto Steve’s shoulder as he empties himself into his body.

“Jesus Christ…” he sighs into Steve’s skin and they remain positioned there for a minute or two.

Eventually Steve reaches up behind him and pokes at Bucky’s right side, hinting for him to get off. When he does they both collapse, breathless and sweaty.

“I think I might need that shower now, Stevie.”

“Yeah… you’re so gross.”

––

Much to each of their surprise, neither Natasha, Clint, nor Sam mention overhearing them the next morning as they’re packing up to head out back to base. Bucky and Steve look at each other with a vague sense of relief.

It is however, a week later when everyone is gathered once more in the kitchen at Avengers Tower that the topic of Steve and swearing gets brought up once more.

Steve is sat at the end of the table, reading the newspaper and taking occasional sips on his coffee (he remembered to refill the pot this time) with Bucky sat on his right who hasn’t quite woken up yet.

“You know, I think swearing is a terrible habit, and I think we should all follow Cap’s lead and become more PG-13” declares Tony as he enters the kitchen holding a large mason jar with a label depicting it as a ‘swear jar’.

“Tony, you’re the worst of them all. Two thirds of that money will be yours” smiles Pepper as she looks up from her tablet long enough to receive a pouting look from her partner.

“Stop ruining my fun. This is the first joke that hasn’t died after two weeks, just let me have this.”

“Sorry to ruin your fun, Stark…” pipes up Natasha. She takes out her phone from her pocket and after a few seconds of scrolling, holds it up in the air. “… but Rogers is the worst of us all.”

Both Steve and Bucky raise their heads and each question “what?” in time for Natasha to tap her screen.

An audio clip begins playing and at first it’s just noise until…

Steve’s face drops and Bucky all but spits out the mouthful of coffee he had just taken.

“Oh my god. Fuck, Bucky, please. Oh fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck…”

Everyone around the table has varying levels of shock displayed on their faces except for Tony who resembles the happiest child on Christmas morning.

“Ah. Ah. I can’t… Bucky… Fuck! Shit. Shit. Shit. I can’t do it…”

When Natasha lowers her phone and stops the recording, everyone silently turns their chairs towards Steve and Bucky with grins spreading across their faces.

Predictably, it’s Tony who breaks the silence. “Wow, Cap. Never knew you had it in you. I’ll have what he’s having, am I right?” he turns to everyone, expecting a round of applause for his hilarious joke.

“You can’t. He’s mine” deadpans Steve as he brings his attention back to his coffee. “Fuck off.”