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your love is my drug (i'm so high)

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“She’s going to murder you once she finds out about this.”

“Oh lighten up, princess. I can always get you to rein her in.”

“Who says I will?”

“Oh, please – I’m too awesome for you to let me die. You would miss me too much.”

“Whatever helps you sleep at night…”

“I’m hurt, princess. Okay now shut up – she’s waking up!”

Lexa groaned; it felt like there was a desert in her throat. Her head was throbbing and the annoying beeping sound in the background was not helping. She slowly opened her eyes and blinked rapidly against the harsh light.

She brought her hand up to rub at her eyes, but it was caught in a bundle of different wires. Lexa frowned.

Where am I?

Lexa looked up from the white blanket she was laying under to take in her surroundings. The first thing she saw was the large window overlooking the city; the sun was beginning to set behind the tall buildings, spilling colors across the sky. Then Lexa noticed various machines around her.

Oh. I’m in the hospital.

Why am I in the hospital?

She groggily turned her head to the left and saw a girl with brown hair, a phone in her hand, and a large grin on her face. Lexa didn’t know her, but she frowned deeper in suspicion.

“We need to work on your pouting game, commander. But please tell the audience at home – how high are you right now?” The girl asked her through a laugh and a wink.

Lexa blinked.

She wasn’t high (I don’t think I am, it’s been a long time since high school…) – she was just tired.

And confused.

Lexa opened her mouth to reply but couldn’t find her voice because her throat was so dry.

Suddenly there was a soft pressure on her right arm so she flopped her head in that direction.

Lexa felt her jaw drop with a quiet gasp.

I am not in the hospital. I died and I am in heaven.

In front of her was a blonde angel. She had piercing blues eyes and a soft and adoring smile on her perfect face.

Holy shit.

The other girl gave a laugh and Lexa could hear the other stranger who called her commander laughing as well.

“Here, Lexa, drink this,” the angel said to Lexa, gently placing a cup in front of her. Lexa clumsily took the straw and drank the cold water that felt like the best fucking thing against her sandpaper-like throat.

She never once looked away from the blonde stranger in fear she would disappear if she did.

Maybe I’m in a desert and she’s a mirage.

“Oh my fucking god I cannot believe this – look at those heart eyes, Clarke!”

“Raven, honestly, she just came out of surgery and anesthesia isn’t fun to wake up from.”

“Well I beg to differ; I’m having fun and it just started.”

Lexa was finally done drinking and pulled away from the straw. Clarke smiled at her and placed the cup on the table beside her.

“Clarke?” Lexa’s voice was rough, but she liked the way the other girl’s name sounded.

“Hey, babe. How’re you feeling? You got out of surgery about an hour ago. Everything went well and you’re going to be just fine. You just have three tiny scars on your belly now, but your appendix won’t be bothering you again. Because it’s, you know, gone.

Lexa heard the beeping pick up in the background.

This literal angel – Clarke – just called Lexa babe.

That has to mean something, right? Oh my god, please let this mean something.

“Babe?” Lexa tested. She needed answers.

“Yeah, what do you need, Lexa?” Clarke leaned over and gently smoothed Lexa's hair down. Lexa felt herself catch on fire wherever Clarke’s skin grazed hers.

“I think I am… Um…?” Lexa felt like there was fog in her head. She just wasn’t sure if it was from the drugs she was on, or Clarke.

“On cloud nine?” Raven prompted from the other side of Lexa – who almost jumped out of her skin because she forgot the other girl was there in her Clarke Haze. Raven’s snicker turned into a cackle when Lexa gave her a glare equivalent to the ferocity of a puppy.

“You think you’re what? In pain?” Her head rolled back to the blonde beauty and just like that the fog in her mind tripled. Lexa shook her head and tried to form a coherent sentence to properly describe the conundrum she was currently dealing with.

“Gay.”

Nailed it.

 “Oh my god!”

Lexa frowned as Raven fell out of her hospital chair from laughing so hard. Meanwhile, Clarke was biting her lip to keep from facing the same fate as her friend.

Oh well that doesn’t help.

“I cannot believe this. I literally cannot. This is YouTube gold!

“Raven, honestly,” Clarke reprimanded.

Okay, Lexa, time to put your thinking beanie on and figure out who Clarke is. And – most importantly – figure out her phone number.

“Do you work here, Clarke?”

The blonde gave an amused chuckle but answered nonetheless. “No, but my mom does. You know that.”

Oh, I do?

“The only thing I know is that you’re really beautiful and I kind of want to hold your hand.”

Oops. Didn’t mean to say that out loud.

But Clarke was blushing and reaching over to hold her hand and suddenly Lexa no longer regretted her lack of filter.

 “Jesus, I’m barfing over here. Who knew the commander was such a sap?”

“Oh I have many inside stories to share later,” Clarke gave a wink and Lexa felt her heart light up with happiness.

“Does that mean we’re together?!” Lexa squeezed Clarke’s hand in excitement.

Please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please say we are.

“Lexa, we’ve been together for almost two years now.”

Oh my fucking god.

“Oh my fucking god. No way. We have? Two years?

Clarke nodded her head and smiled.

“That’s like forever! And you’re dating me? For two years?

Clarke grinned and kissed the back of Lexa’s hand that she was holding.

“Jesus Christ this keeps getting better and better.”

Lexa ignored Raven.

“Wow,” Lexa’s head dropped back against her pillow and she stared up at the ceiling. She blinked as a grin slowly took over her face. She turned her head to look back at Clarke again.

“We’re dating?”

“Uh huh.”

“And we’ve been dating for two years?”

“This coming July.”

“So does this mean we’ve kissed?”

Raven almost fell out of the chair again.

“Many times.”

Lexa’s heart felt like it was going to burst out of her chest.

“Whoa… Because you’re just… Whoa… Do we live together?”

“Yes we do; we live in an apartment on the third floor with lots of flowers and paints and every Sunday we make pancakes.”

Lexa wanted to cry.

Oh, I actually am crying.

“Holy shit – the commander is crying! And – huh, she’s not melting.”

Clarke leaned over to wipe her tears away.

“Oh no, babe, it’s alright. Don’t cry, Lexa. You’re okay.” Clarke softly shushed her, but Lexa felt more tears coming.

“I’m just so happy.” Clarke continued to wipe her tears away and Lexa felt butterflies fill up her stomach.

“Oh man, Octavia is going to be so pissed that she missed this. Thank god for modern day technology, am I right?”

“Raven, seriously.”

Lexa squeezed Clarke’s hand to bring her attention back to her. She felt like every atom in her body was a tiny star and there were millions of supernovas happening all at once inside of her.

But she also felt tired.

Very, very tired.

Clarke smiled as Lexa’s eyelids drooped down. Lexa was fighting to stay awake, but it was a losing battle.

“Lexa… Go to sleep, okay? You need your rest. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

“Promise?” Lexa mumbled. She didn’t know Clarke, but she couldn’t ignore the pinging in her heart. She felt as if she was floating – high above the clouds, and the only thing that could ground her was Clarke.

“I promise.”

Lexa shook her head to stay awake for a little bit longer.

“One more thing,” Lexa less said and more slurred.

“Anything,” Clarke answered.

Lexa looked back out the window at the sunset and then over at Clarke.

“Do you know that I love you?”

Clarke’s smile was filled with adoration as she leaned over to gently kiss Lexa’s forehead. Lexa’s eyes drifted close at the contact, and they didn’t open again.

“I love you too. I promise.”

Clarke ran her hand through Lexa’s hair as she began to softly hum.

“That was so gross. You know that, right?”

“Oh shut up, Raven,” Clarke laughed at her friend. “… But make sure you send me that video. It’s so going on Facebook.