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Pitiful Existence

Summary:

Shuichi chooses a...different path.

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Ending X/3.

Alternate Ending(s) of Final Punishment.

Or, in other words, Shuichi dies a lot, in many “what if” scenarios.

Chapter 1: Chapter One: Through Icy Lakes

Chapter Text

     His dorm seemed welcoming, this time he returned. It wasn’t like last night. He wasn’t plagued by his thoughts, he wasn’t stuck in an endless loop of questions, and no answers. He didn’t need Keiji to help him this time. He had the confidence that..everything would be okay. At least, for now, right? What was going to happen? Nobody would die. Nobody died the previous night. Nobody was going to die. Everyone understood that..their lives mean more than some memories that they could always make up later. 

     He slid his keys back into his pocket, twisting open the knob before he entered. Tomorrow will be..a good day. They’d make it a good day. Maybe they could figure out, get out before anyone dies? He really didn’t know what else to do. For tonight, though? Tonight was a night of rest. A night of peace. 

     He was about to close the door when he saw a pair of shoes standing before his door. Confusion filled him, and as he looked up to see who had arrived, his vision went dark, a sharp pain bursting through his temple and all he could really feel before completely crumbling was…pain? 

 


 

     It was cold. His skin felt prickly against the frigid temperature. He seemed to be…growing accustomed to the cold. How long had he been here? Actually, where was he? He shifted, skin sticking to the floor around him, and everything was burning. “Ah. It took you a while to wake up, hm?” 

     He looked up, eyes turning towards the individual talking to him. Levi Uta. He seemed…sadistic, in the dull light above them. His fingers twitched, forcing himself up until he was kneeling before the other. What was even going on? “What…why did you bring me here, Levi?” 

     “There’s no use in crying, Shuichi. I know who you are. I know what you are. You want us to die. You want us to give up our hope! You have your memories. You have your thoughts. The rest of us are suffering, and you won’t tell us what you know. You won’t tell us how to escape. It’s all your fault, Shuichi. Why are you so special?” Levi moved closer, his footfalls heavy as he approached. He scooted back, trying to put more space between them. 

     Levi held something, he couldn’t make it out, but what he did know was that Levi had every intention of hurting him. He wouldn’t doubt that Levi wanted to kill him. If..if Levi thought it was his fault that they were here, there was nothing he could say to solve it. He wasn’t the reason, but…it was true. He knew more than the rest of them. He could remember his family, his friends, what his life was like before they arrived here. Maybe…Maybe it was his fault. 

     The strike was quick, almost practiced even. Pain blossomed in his skull as though his brain was rattling around. He assumed it was some type of pan, or even a tenderizer. The pain didn’t stop. The pain never stopped. It kept going, Levi kept going. Blood began to fill his vision, even with his hands trying to protect his head. It grew worse and worse before he just…slowly lost his consciousness. 

 


 

     The cold grew worse. The air became colder, drier. He attempted to move, despite the way his body ached in pain. Blood stained his uniform, and he was glad that his uniform was black Maybe…maybe Levi wasn’t going to kill him. Only…only torture him? He’d live through that. He could live. Maybe this wasn’t his end? He would hope not…he didn’t want to die, not here. He wanted to save them, he wanted to get everyone out of this game. 

    Why? Why did Levi assume he was the reason behind this? He knew Monokuma told him not to tell anyone about the Sacrificial Perk. Was that the reason why Levi was targeting him? The door opened once more, and a rush of heat flooded the room. He felt like he could breathe again, even if it was only for a few seconds. 

     He shifted back, a poor attempt to avoid Levi as he drew nearer, only to realize he was bound to one of the shelves. His hope slowly drained, fear filling his bones and giving the slight amount of warmth he was desperate for. “This is it, Saihara. It’s your fault we’re here, and once you’re gone? We’ll be free. So. I’m going to kill you.” 

     “You’re going to die. If you kill me, they’re going to execute you! You’re going to die! Please, please, Levi. I don’t want everyone to die. Please, Save them. Save them!” His voice cracked, it was raw with the amount of strength it needed. With the amount of emotion in it. This was it. This…this was his time, wasn’t it?

     A burning pain erupted in his ribs and Levi didn’t bother waiting for the other to catch his breath before kicking him again. Again and again, Levi struck and struck, refusing to give up. It felt like he was accepting Levi’s fit of anger, his rage. A sickening crack sounded and Levi stepped away. His anger seemed settled after that, but he knew deep down…it wasn’t the end. 

     His nose gushed blood, painting his chin and seeping into his checkered scarf. The heat had flooded his skin, and he felt somehow warmer than when the door had opened. Levi stepped back, disappearing outside for a moment and he felt like this would be his only chance to breathe. 

     His head laid against the rack behind him, panting aloud as he tried to catch his breath. His lungs hurt, burned. His stomach churned before he realized that…he couldn’t escape. Levi wanted to kill him. He was going to kill him. How could he stop that? How could he stop someone who had complete control over him? 

     The door swung open before him, and his fear spiked. It felt like instincts had kicked in, but he couldn’t listen to them. He was trapped, no matter how much he fought. He could fight for days and nothing would change. Levi stood before him, emotionless above him. He wanted to kick and scream. But..he couldn't. 

     Fingers twisted up in his hair, forcing his head back and a gasp left his mouth. Pain sprouted in his scalp, but he knew. He knew it wouldn’t last long. It wouldn’t last forever. Levi forced a towel into his mouth, shoving it far enough back that he could feel himself gagging. Tears sprung in his eyes, and he was afraid once again. He was mortified. “Goodbye, Shuichi.” 

     He watched Levi walk off, disappearing out of what he finally figured out was the freezer. The kitchen’s walk-in freezer. The towel had soaked up every bit of saliva in his mouth, and he really didn’t know how this was going to end. Was he going to suffocate? Freeze to death? His nose bled and bled, dyeing the towels pristine white fabric. This was it. No matter how he went, he was going to be left here, alone. He would die, alone. 

 


 

     He didn’t realize his eyes had closed until he forced them open. He was tired. And so, so cold. He was freezing, but he..couldn’t do anything. He was stuck. Tied up, tangled up. Silenced. He hated knowing that he couldn’t even attempt calling out for help. Levi wanted him to die, without anyone knowing. Levi wanted him to perish while he went and slept in his room. Give himself an alibi. He knew it, but he couldn’t do much to stop it. Change it. It was just him. 

     He blinked, staring blankly. He wanted to go home. Return home. Be somewhere asfe. He could feel the cold nipping and biting at his skin. He felt the burning all over. He couldn’t do anything to change it. Fingers trailed over his wrist, slowly unknotting the rope that left him stuck. He must’ve been dreaming. He must’ve fallen asleep again. Nobody would untie him. He was meant to die. 

     Those same fingers gently fished the towel out of his mouth, and in that moment, he realized how achy his jaw had grown. How long had he been stuck here? He blinked, trying to ignore the way his brain wished to give up, lay down and die. He sniffled, wiping his nose on his sleeve, and that’s when he realized that there was no blood? None wiped off onto the dark sleeve, at least, not from what he could tell. 

     Hands helped him up, keeping him from falling back down. He felt dizzy, confused. He didn’t understand what was even going on. His vision slowly began to clear. Soft, purple hair came into his view, fingers trailing over his face to settle him down silently. He was so very confused. His fingers twinged as he gripped the person before him. “It’s okay, Shumai. Don’t be scared. It’s over now.” 

     “What’s…What’s over?” His voice was..uneasy. His confusion bled into his tone, and he went to look around when hands prevented him from looking. He was nervous. What was..going on? His eyes met the purple haired individual’s and suddenly recognition flashed through his mind. “Kokichi…? What’s going on? I thought..I thought you were dead.” 

     “Of course not, Shumai! I can’t die, I’m invincible!” Kokichi grinned, smiling brightly despite his own confusion. He couldn’t believe it. His fingers gripped at Kokichi’s arms, staring at his lover. God, it’d been so long since he’d seen him. “Well, that’s a lie. Anyway~! Let me take you home?” 

 


 

     Keiji slowly sat up, exhaustion coursing through his veins as he tried to force himself to get moving. Today would be a good day. The buddy system idea that Shuichi helped him to think of would save them. Keep everyone from dying. Keep them from losing to self preservation. They could make it.

     He got up, dressing himself in his new uniform. A uniform he didn’t really want, but one they were all forced to wear. It’s okay. They were special here. They were supposed to survive this. To overcome this killing game. It’d be okay. 

     They met in the dining hall again. He counted. Recounted. Kept counting until he felt like he was going nuts. Someone was missing. Everyone had come the day before, why would someone decide to stop coming? Has the game already started? Who…

     Shuichi. Shuichi was gone. No matter how many times he counted, the only one missing was Shuichi. They split up. Determined. They couldn’t let the game start. They couldn’t afford to lose someone. Not now. Not ever! 

     Keiji raced to the dorms. He didn’t ever remember moving this fast, but he couldn’t believe it. Shuichi wasn’t the person who wouldn’t show up. He wanted this to end, right? He didn’t…Keiji forced the thoughts out of his head as he reached the dorms, his fingers gripping Shuichi’s door knob. It was unlocked. Open. Not something Shuichi would do. He’d seen it previously. Shuichi was scared, he would never leave his door unlocked. 

     As he looked inside, he realized that something was…extremely wrong. Blood. Blood on the floor, right behind the door. Somewhere deep inside, he knew the game had begun. He knew what had happened. Now? Now he just had to disprove it. Shuichi couldn’t die. Not now. 

     Screams echoed through the ship, a continuous echo seemingly deafening him. No. No this couldn’t be happening. His feet started carrying him out, and heading back for the dining hall. Everyone had to know. Someone..someone… 

     No one was in the dining hall, but he could see someone rushing into the kitchen and he quickly followed behind. What else could he do? What else was he supposed to do? Everyone seemed to be frozen, just beside the walk-in freezer. Keiji forced himself through the crowd of students, Aiko and Haya standing at the front. It seemed as though Aiko had been the one to scream. His eyes turned ahead, finally…finally understanding why she screamed. 

     Shuichi. He laid still, sitting in the far corner of the freezer. His hands bound to the shelf before him. Tied firmly enough his skin had been rubbed raw. Yet…his skin had lost all of its color. The only bit of color on his body was his lips, colored by a soft blue hue. A towel was shoved in his mouth, dyed the color of his blood. Blood…So much of it. 

     His eyelashes held frost, even his hair had begun to freeze. Keiji glanced up, making eye contact with..what little remained of Shuichi. His eyes had glazed over, left wide open in his seemingly undisturbed rest. No matter the amount of blood coating him, he seemed…at ease. “Shuichi…”

The game had begun. 

 

  Game Over. 

  Try Again? 

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Yes           [No]