Jungkook wasn't exactly sure how or when it happened but everytime he looked at Jimin - the way his eyes lit up when he smiled, the soothing sound of his voice, the secure feeling of his arms wrapped around him, the feeling of his soft lips pressed to his cheek or his forehead - his heart fluttered and a light blush would coat his cheeks.
In interviews, he found himself getting distracted by Jimin's pink lips and he'd mentally smack himself as a reminder to look away from Jimin and at the cameras recording them.
He felt disgusted with himself for even thinking that way of his band member.
With each passing day, Jungkook felt his feelings for Jimin grow. To be honest, it scared him. What would the members think of him being gay? What would Jimin think? How would they react? Would they accept him or would they feel disgusted about it?
He sat at the table with his head in his hands and felt the familiar sting of tears in his eyes. He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't hear the sound of the front door creaking open.
When Yoongi returned back home from the studio, he didn't expect to see anyone awake, considering it was almost midnight and the boys were really tired after dance practice that evening.
"Jungkook? Are you okay?" he questioned, placing a hand on the younger's back, startling the boy from his train of thoughts and causing him to look up at the older.
Yoongi frowned when he saw the younger's tear-filled eyes, immediately going into protective mode. "What's got you all upset, Jungkook?"
The gentle tone of Yoongi's voice made Jungkook break down completely. His sobs filled the kitchen and Yoongi immediately gathered the distressed maknae in his arms, rubbing comforting circles on his back. They remained that way for a few minutes before Jungkook calmed down enough to speak.
"I-I'm s-sorry, hyung," he said, in between hiccups, "I'm s-sorry I'm not n-normal."
"Kook, what do you mean? Have you been reading hate comments again? You know they aren't true," Yoongi spoke, but the younger shook his head.
"Did someone say something to you? Did you argue with one of the boys?"
Another head shake.
"Kook, look at me," Yoongi said, gently pulling the maknae, whose face was buried in his chest, to look at him. Concerned black eyes met tear-filled brown ones. "What happened?"
"I-I... You'll h-hate m-me, hyung."
"We both know that is not true. Now tell me what is it that's bothering you?" Yoongi asked.
"I-I'm g-gay," Jungkook choked out, hiding his face in Yoongi's chest once again, a strangled sob escaped his lips, "and I'm s-sorry, h-hyung."
"Kookie, listen to me very carefully. I don't know what led you to think that I would hate you for being gay, but if it's because of something I did or said, then I'm sorry," Yoongi spoke, making Jungkook face him once again, "It's completely normal, Jungkook. You are allowed to love whoever you wish and we are no one to judge you for that. I think it's really brave of you to tell me that. I'm proud of you, Kookie."
"You don't hate me?" Jungkook asked, quietly, looking at Yoongi with wide eyes.
"Aish, you brat! Weren't you listening to anything I just said? Of course, I don't hate you," Yoongi smiled, wiping Jungkook's tears with his thumbs, " Now stop crying"
Yoongi hummed in response.
"I-I'm scared to tell the rest. Could you please keep this a secret?"
"Of course, Jungkookie. Whenever you're ready. Hyung is here for you if you ever need help," Yoongi said, ruffling the younger's hair.
"Thank you, hyung," Jungkook whispered, burying his face in the older's neck as the other rubbed his back, soothingly.
It had been almost a month since Jungkook came out to Yoongi and true to his word, Yoongi hadn't told the members about it. Jungkook began avoiding Jimin in hopes that his feelings towards the older would disappear, but it didn't.
Jimin wasn't stupid. He knew the younger was avoiding him. What he didn't know was, why. He wracked his brain trying to think of situations where he might have said or done something for the younger to behave that way, but he couldn't.
He decided to confront Jungkook. After dance practice, Jimin announced that Jungkook would stay back with him to practice a part that he was struggling with. Once the members left, Jimin immediately turned to Jungkook with a frown on his face.
"Alright maknae, what's going on? I know you have been avoiding me. Everytime I try to get you to go out with me, you make up some silly excuse. You don't speak to me the way you used to. You don't let me hug you. What did I do, Kookie?" Jimin asked, a hint of desperation in his voice.
"I don't know what you're talking about, hyung," Jungkook said, avoiding his gaze.
"That's bullshit, Jungkook, and you know it. You can't even look at me right now. Tell me what's wrong. Please, Kookie."
"Hyung, nothing's wrong. Please let's just practice and go home," Jungkook sighed, still not meeting the older's gaze.
"No, Jungkook. I want to talk about this. You have been avoiding me and I want to know why," Jimin cried, now feeling frustrated.
"I told you, hyung. Nothing is wrong. Stop making such a big deal of it," Jungkook cried, raising his voice a little.
"Jungkook, don't raise your voice at me!"
"Just because you're my hyung, doesn't mean I can't."
"Jungkook," Jimin warned, glaring at the younger.
"Hyung, I'm tired and I want to go home. Let's just get this over with," Jungkook sighed. He really didn't want to argue with Jimin. However, his statement only seemed to increase Jimin's anger and frustration.
"I don't care if you're tired. You have been avoiding me for almost a month now and I'm really getting tired of it. I want to know why, Jungkook. We're not going home till you talk to me about this!"
"I already told you nothing is wrong! So just drop it! Stop shoving your nose in other people's business, hyung. It's really annoying! Stop being so fucking annoying!" Jungkook shouted, looking up to meet Jimin glare.
And oh, how he wished he could just take back what he just said. Jimin's gaze visibly darkened and Jungkook gulped.
He didn't mean to disrespect Jimin. He just wanted Jimin to stop questioning him. He didn't want Jimin to find out about the crush he had. But, he'd lost his temper when Jimin showed no signs of dropping it and blurted out the first thing that came to his mind without thinking.
If looks could kill, Jungkook was sure he'd be dead.
"Fine. I'll stop caring about you. Don't speak to me. Don't call me. Do whatever you want. I don't care anymore," Jimin spoke calmly and left the room.
Jungkook stood frozen in place. What the hell just happened? He sank to the floor as Jimin's words echoed in his head. No! He'd ruined it. He'd ruined their friendship.
Jimin did not care about him anymore. Jimin did not want to speak to him. He felt his heart tear apart.
"What have I done? What have I done!" Jungkook cried, tugging at his hair, harsh sobs wracking his frame.
He didn't mean to say that to Jimin. He loved the older. However, in his desperation to get Jimin off the topic, he'd raised his voice and said things he didn't mean.
He had to find Jimin. He had to apologise immediately. Grabbing his bag, he quickly ran out of the studio.
It was raining heavily. The sound of thunder rumbling reached his ears. He didn't have an umbrella, but at this moment, he really didn't care. He had to find Jimin.
He ran blindly for a minute or two, choking on sobs, when he suddenly realised he didn't know where he was. There was not a soul in sight. He felt panic settle in and looked around frantically.
He needed to speak to Jimin, and he did the one thing he could think of. He pulled out his phone and dialed Jimin's number.
Jimin had almost reached the house after walking in the rain for 20 minutes when his phone rang. He pulled out his phone to see Jungkook's name flash across the screen. With the fight still fresh in his mind, he huffed and decided to ignore it, but a part of him was really worried about leaving Jungkook alone in the studio.
He sighed and picked up the call but before he could say a word, the sound of harsh breathing and choked sobs reached his ears.
"Jimin-hyung, I'm s-so s-sorry."
"I said don't call me," Jimin growled into the phone.
He didn't get a response, but he could hear Jungkook sobbing and coughing into the phone, and it broke his heart.
Taking a deep breath to calm himself, he asked,"Where are you?"
"I-I d-don't know", he heard Jungkook say in between sobs.
Now Jimin was definitely worried. He felt all the anger drain out of him.
"Tell me where you are, I'll come get you," Jimin said, concern evident in his voice.
"H-hyung, there's a taxi here. I'll meet you back home."
"Alright Kookie, I'll wait for you," Jimin spoke into the phone before disconnecting the call.
He sighed. He couldn't stay mad at Jungkook, no matter what the younger did and he couldn't help but worry about him. He stood outside the house for what seemed like an hour before a taxi pulled up at the side of the road and a figure stepped out.
Jungkook! Immediately, Jimin rushed forward and pulled the younger boy into a hug as the taxi drove away. He didn't care about getting wet in the rain at the moment. All he cared about was Jungkook and he was here.
Jungkook buried his face in Jimin's shoulder and began to sob, fresh tears spilling down his cheeks and onto Jimin's shirt.
"I-I'm s-sorry, h-hyung," he kept mumbling in between choked sobs.
"Let's get inside before we both catch a cold," Jimin spoke, guiding the younger inside.
Once inside, Jimin got a good look at the younger and he felt his heart clench at the sight. Jungkook was drenched, his eyes were red and swollen, and his body was shaking with sobs.
"H-hyung, I-I'm s-sorry. I'm sorry. D-didn't mean to s-say what I-I said to you. I-I-"
"Shh Kook, stop crying. It's okay. It's okay. Breathe now. Don't cry," Jimin comforted, wrapping his arms around the distressed boy in an attempt to calm him down.
"I'm sorry, I'm s-sorry. I'm so stupid h-hyung."
"Hey, none of that. You're not stupid. It's alright. I forgive you. Now shh, stop crying. It's okay."
He began to press light kisses to Jungkook's forehead, his hands rubbing the younger's back in soothing circles.
"You'll h-hate me," Jungkook sobbed, hiding his face in his hands and Jimin immediately but gently, pulled his hands away.
"Kook, why in the world would you think that? Is it because we fought?"
"No," Jungkook whispered.
"Does this have something to do with you avoiding me?"
A small nod.
"Kook, I don't get it. Why do you think I'd hate you? I could never hate you."
"B-because I ... I'm g-gay," Jungkook managed to choke out, tears making their way down his cheeks. Jimin stared at Jungkook for a second, before cupping the boy's face.
"Kookie, I'm so proud of you for telling me. I don't know how you got the idea of me hating you for being gay, which is really stupid considering the fact that I'm gay too," Jimin spoke softly and the maknae's eyes widened.
"Yes Kookie, I am," Jimin smiled.
"Hyung?" Jungkook said, quietly after a few seconds of silence.
"There's something else I-I h-have to tell y-you."
Jimin nodded, encouraging the younger to go on.
"I s-started a-avoiding you, but not just because I am gay."
Understanding struck Jimin and his eyes widened.
"Jungkook, do you like me?"
"I'm s-sorry, please don't hate me. I avoided y-you because I thought if I did, I wouldn't have feelings for you anymore. I-I'm s-sorry."
"Kookie, look at me," Jimin smiled, putting his finger under the younger boy's chin, causing the maknae to meet his hyung's tear-filled eyes.
Jungkook's eyes widened.
"Jiminie-hyung, why are you crying?"
"Kookie, I've waited so long to hear you say this."
If possible, Jungkook's eyes grew even wider at that.
"Yes silly, I like you a lot. I have feelings for you too. Have had feelings for you for more than a year now. You don't know how long I've waited to hear you say this," Jimin said, wiping away Jungkook's tears and kissing the tip of his nose, "I could never hate you."
Jimin pulled the younger close, running his fingers through the boy's hair as Jungkook began to cry in relief. He pressed a light kiss to the boy's forehead before pulling away to look at him.
"I-I like you a lot too, Jimin-hyung."
"Can I... Can I kiss you, Kookie?" Jimin asked, making the maknae blush and Jimin couldn't help but coo at him.
"Please hyung," Jungkook whispered and Jimin leaned forward, locking lips with the younger boy. They stayed that way for a several seconds, Jungkook's arms wrapped around Jimin's waist and Jimin's fingers running through Jungkook's hair, before they pulled apart, their foreheads touching.
"I love you, Kookie."
"I love you too, Chim."
"Now let's go change out of these wet clothes. The last thing we need is Jin-hyung walking in to find us drenched. Also, I don't want my kookie baby getting a cold," Jimin said and the younger giggled, as the older held his hand and guided him towards their shared room.