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dreams of mastery

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Essek helps Caleb clean his apartment and it does not take long for Caleb to regret it. He’s putting away Caleb’s laundry, tidying up the sloppy piles of clothes in his drawers, when he pauses, snorts, and withdraws the sparkly purple dildo Mollymauk had gifted him last Heimtag.

“Was this your stand-in at the start of your crush?” Essek asks, his words mean in the way he gets sometimes, too sharp on accident, but they’re said between delighted giggles, the smile he’s fighting sweet and entirely genuine.

Caleb still flushes.

Ach, a gift,” he says, making Essek laugh harder.

“From whom?”

Caleb shrugs, but gives in and tells him the story. His boyfriend ends up laughing harder than Caleb has ever seen, flushed and glowing and almost in tears by the time Caleb gets to the part from the Nein’s Heimtag party where he finally admitted to making porn.

“I can’t believe they had a bet,” Essek says, delicately wiping his eyes.

Ja, I very nearly died on the spot.”

Essek grins at him at that, absolutely besotted with him.

“If Mollymauk suspected your work before Heimtag then….”

“It’s absolutely not a coincidence,” Caleb says. He knows his friend intimately, and Mollymauk knows him just as well, even if he’s… grown, since they were involved.

Essek’s grin grows devious, and he strokes the dildo in his hand delicately, just his fingertips, the way he’ll tease Caleb sometimes. Caleb knows all too well what the look on Essek’s face means, blood already pooling in his groin as his mind rapidly supplies all sorts of situations his boyfriend may put him in.

“Well, it’s important to make use of gifts, especially… practical ones,” Essek purrs. Caleb swallows thickly.

“Is that so?” he asks, playing into Essek’s teasing game.

“Yes. It would be rude not to,” Essek says, before smiling brightly, a smile of projected innocence. He turns back to Caleb’s laundry, tucking things away neatly for him, and drops the subject.

The dildo gets rehomed to the top of Caleb’s dresser, jutting proudly as a reminder.


Later, long enough that Caleb thinks Essek forgot about his mischievous plans, Essek sits in his lap, his pants off and his shirt unbuttoned, pressing sloppy kisses against the side of Caleb’s neck. It’s good, lazy and still so full of want, the way Essek usually is when there are no cameras pointed their way, Essek taking his time to tease him, showering him in attention. Caleb is still almost uncomfortable with it, much more suited to being the one to give pleasure rather than being the center of focus but… he trusts Essek. Essek has shown himself worth that trust.

Caleb lets his hands simply rest on Essek’s thighs, carefully still as he lets his boyfriend… pleasure him. Essek’s weight rests directly over Caleb’s groin, ass pressed against Caleb’s erection, and Caleb wonders when Essek will be finished with his teasing. Not that he dislikes it; that’s not an issue, not at all, he just—wants to touch Essek back, more than he is. The laziness, the softness, is not unwanted. Caleb is just bad at slow.

“Please, Schatz,” Caleb murmurs, half laughing at how this parallels one of their earlier videos, the one where he had fucked Essek for the first time. Essek hmms in his ear, sounding fully like the cat who got the cream.

“Please, what?” Essek purrs, and the tease makes Caleb shiver, dick flexing under Essek. The twitch in his pants makes Essek laugh, delicious and a little mean, definitely the cat who got the cream.

Caleb squeezes Essek’s slim hips in his hands and pulls him down, tighter against his own as he pushes up, grinding into his boyfriend. The way Essek gasps a little at that only serves to fuel the flames burning in Caleb’s guts, and Essek laughs some more.

“Impatient,” Essek chastises, shifting to kiss Caleb on the mouth again, one little peck before he asks, “Would you care to indulge me?”

“Of course. In what?”

Essek kisses him again, nips at his lips, and says, “A test of concentration.”

Ja, ja, I see, a surprise.”

“I’ll tell you if you want.”

This time it’s Caleb who kisses Essek, a soft, lingering peck before he says, “Surprises are good. I trust you, Schatz, so do your worst.”

Essek laughs and bumps his forehead against Caleb’s. The way he smiles is—perfect, warm and delighted, obviously enamored with Caleb, and Caleb adores it, adores him. There’s just the briefest pause where they breathe each other in, lingering, before Essek straightens and climbs out of Caleb’s lap.

“You’ll need to be nude,” he says, settling in to lounge against the pillows next to Caleb. He looks good, fully in his element. Part of that is from their job, Caleb knows, but a bigger part is from—him, from Essek’s comfort around Caleb, from the fact that they—trust each other, that they—

Caleb follows Essek’s direction, pulling his shirt from over his head, winking at the way his boyfriend watches him. He almost expects Essek to touch himself as Caleb undresses but he doesn’t, hands politely folded against the edge of the pillow despite the arousal obvious in his tiny underwear. Still, he looks further pleased with every article of clothing Caleb removes, his jeans going next followed by a shimmy to get his boxers off. Caleb matches Essek’s lounge when he’s done, one hand settling around his length, cheekily stroking himself, daring Essek to deny him.

He doesn’t. Essek bites his lip, eyes following the path Caleb’s hand travels on himself. Caleb can see the warmth blooming in Essek’s cheeks, faint under his ever-present foundation but evident at the tips of his pointy ears. He can see the way Essek’s thighs tense too, can see the slight shift of his hips as he tries to ignore his own arousal. He looks—pleased, and Caleb still can’t get over that, can’t get over the idea that this beautiful man has decided Caleb is what he wants.

“What next?” Caleb asks, refusing to let himself question Essek’s interest. Essek lifts his eyes, mischief twinkling in his indigo irises. He tilts his head a little, smiles a little, and says, “Hands and knees.”

Caleb follows these directions too, settling himself with his ass in the air. Essek scoots closer and touches Caleb’s shoulder, silently guiding him into resting his head in Essek’s lap. Caleb’s heart picks up, blood thundering in his veins, but it’s mostly excitement that floods him, not anxiety. It’s a novel experience, trusting someone so much.

The air tingles with magical discharge and Caleb’s breath hitches. He grins into Essek’s thigh, settling himself more comfortably against his boyfriend. He’s tempted to slip a hand down—with the way he’s resting, one elbow next to Essek’s knee, arm folded over his thigh, just touching Essek’s erection, his other hand is largely free to do whatever he wishes. However, Essek is running this show, pleased as punch to be in his position of power, and Caleb knows he spends too much time trying to take care of his boyfriend the way he wants to, which is not necessarily what Essek wants. He can let Essek take care of him on occasion.

Essek’s mage hand—it has to be a mage hand—dribbles lube directly onto Caleb. It slips over his tailbone and down his crack, dripping from his balls onto the covers under them. It’s cool but not cold, and again, Caleb wishes to touch himself in tandem with whatever Essek plans. He waits and it’s worth it, Essek’s flesh and blood hands coming to pet his head, fingers combing through his hair as spectral fingers touch his hole.

It’s strange, the way Essek’s mage hand tingles, almost electric, little continuous static shocks against sensitive flesh. It’s weirder when Essek uses his mage hand to press into Caleb; the way he stretches around nothing but the electric feel of the magic is strange. He shudders, cuddling closer to Essek, thumb petting over the curve of Essek’s shaft still hidden behind his underwear. Essek’s dick twitches under the attention, his breath wavering a little, and he pushes spectral fingers deeper into Caleb.

It feels good too. Essek is careful with him, as he always is. They’ve done this before, where Caleb is on the receiving end, and despite Essek’s outward bravado, he’s always so careful. It’s nice; different, but nice, Essek showing Caleb how much he cares with his touch. They haven’t said—Caleb is too nervous to voice his feelings too intensely, still cautious after what happened with Mollymauk despite the staggering differences in the situation he’s found himself in with Essek. They haven’t said it but Caleb can feel how much Essek cares for him in his touch, and this is no different, magic mixing with intent until precome drips from Caleb’s neglected dick.

“Good?” Essek asks after an eon of careful breaths and gentle touches. Caleb nods against Essek’s thigh, so comfortably aroused he doesn’t even think of verbalizing his affirmation. Essek brushes loose hair behind Caleb’s ear, murmuring, “Good.”

He adds a second spectral finger and Caleb gasps at the stretch. Essek’s mage hand feels—bigger than his actual hands, his slim fingers not stretching him to this extent so quickly. It’s nice, similar to how his own hand feels on the occasion he touches himself like this. It’s nice, too, having Essek’s flesh and blood hands on him, touching his cheek, petting his hair, and it’s nice being able to feel Essek’s arousal even if he’s not doing much about it—yet.

Caleb still wants to touch himself, faintly trembling with the force of his arousal. This thing they’re doing is distinctly soft, gentle the way Essek is with him, but it’s heady too, filling him quietly but with intent. He feels like he should be surprised by the depth of his want—want to touch Essek, want to touch himself, want to fuck or be fucked. It’s—different from a fixation, he’s realizing, too much but not necessarily in a bad way, overwhelming but welcomed by Essek, matched by Essek.

“What next?” Caleb asks again, breathing the words, lulled into a daze by the gentle, steady push and pull of Essek’s mage hand. The touch falters, both the mage hand and Essek’s own flesh and blood hands, stilling for half a heart beat as Essek decides on—what to say, or maybe what does come next.

“Next, I fuck you,” Essek says simply, sounding more nervous than he should. He pulls the mage hand from Caleb’s insides, the loss of the phantom touch making Caleb whimper, and Caleb shifts to let Essek out from under him.

Essek doesn’t move. He gently touches Caleb’s shoulder again, pushing downwards just the slightest bit, a hint of an order, and Caleb relaxes, wondering. There’s rustling from across the room, Essek’s flesh and blood hands smoothing over Caleb’s shoulder and spine, then—

It’s the fucking dildo. It has to be; besides the harness Essek had gifted him late for Heimtag, he doesn’t particularly own anything else salacious besides porn and lube. Essek presses it into him, faintly buzzing from being held with his mage hand, and it’s enough to make Caleb’s toes curl. He fights not to squirm against its intrusion, cool like the lube and bigger than Essek too, just the slightest bit. Essek inches it in, slowly, carefully, as he does with himself when he properly fucks Caleb, all the while petting Caleb everywhere he can reach from his spot at the head of the bed.

Once the dildo is fully seated within Caleb, Essek asks again, breathless, “Good?”

And again, Caleb nods, though this time it’s because he’s not sure he can trust his voice not to crack. The intrusion still borders on uncomfortable, fresh and thick, his body perpetually unused to it despite how frequently they—Caleb swallows hard, breathing hard, focusing on the soft, soothing touch of Essek’s nimble hands as he uses magic to fill him. It is good, different but good. He’s still incredibly hard, despite his discomfort, and Essek—he can feel how Essek has oozed precome into his underwear, the fabric at his head wet where Caleb’s knuckles touch him.

That gets him more than anything, the knowledge that Essek—somehow, and still—finds so much pleasure from his body. He welcomes the knowledge and the want to make use of his body to further pleasure his boyfriend, but he doesn’t dwell on it, doesn’t question it like his instincts say he should. It’s enough that he does, for now, and Caleb—

“Fuck, Essek,” he groans when Essek finally shifts the dildo within him, pulling out the slightest bit to push in again, deeper, making him tremble.

“Yes?” Essek asks in reply, sounding smug again, too pleased, the cat who got the cream, and Caleb thinks about how this would be very good filmed, the potential response tempting him from his comfort zone. Essek in his element is a force to be reckoned with and their fans would delight in seeing Caleb at his mercy.

He tells Essek that and Essek laughs, stroking the edge of Caleb’s jaw as he says, “There’s some things I’d rather keep to myself.”

Caleb just groans, unable to think of anything to say, tense and trembling just the slightest bit. That—Essek’s words, that single sentence, that one teasing phrase said so casually—Caleb doesn’t know how to deal, overwhelmed by—he doesn’t know why he’s so anxious over saying it. He’s sure Essek feels the same but—Essek hasn’t said anything either so Caleb worries, even with—

Essek thrusts the dildo into Caleb again, carefully, gently, as he does, but still with enough force that another groan pops from Caleb’s lips. His his hips rock forward on instinct, too used to Essek’s slight frame behind him as they fuck, and he slips up, further into Essek’s lap. It’s so easy to lift his head and kiss at Essek’s erection, a perfectly natural escalation, an instinct as intuitive as breathing. It pushes against his lips as Essek gasps then laughs, soft and sweet as he touches Caleb’s cheek.

Caleb breathes through the next thrust of the dildo, lips on Essek, lost to the twin feel of Essek in front of him and yet also behind. He’s thought of this before, in other ways, occasionally wondering what the duration of that spell Essek had cast was, the one with the shadow echo of himself, and how that could be put to use. This is as good if not better than what he had imagined, Essek’s skill as a caster in this situation more than enough to get and keep Caleb hard.

And Essek doesn’t stop him from pressing desperate little kisses against his own erection, still petting Caleb as he continues to work the dildo in and out. He doesn’t stop Caleb from sucking at his wet head, tasting him, and he doesn’t stop Caleb from cupping his length through his underwear with his free hand. Caleb isn’t sure what Essek’s plans were, are, but he does know he wants to put his mouth on his boyfriend.

He teases Essek more, tongue wet against the fly of his underwear. Caleb ignores the way the fabric tastes, ignores the linty feel of it, focused fully on the hitch of Essek’s breath as he lathes attention over Essek’s most sensitive spots, the edge of his foreskin and the curve of his glans. Essek’s hands almost tremble where they touch Caleb, the feather light skim of his fingertips over the curve of Caleb’s neck and shoulder stuttering as his breath picks up.

It doesn’t take long for Caleb to get his wish, Essek tugging the waistband of his underwear down and under his dick.

“Go on,” he says, and Caleb shudders, groaning at his tone. It’s not often that Essek will take that tone with him outside of their work, but it’s grown on him through their work, a Pavlovian response building in him over the months they’ve been together until he can’t help but respond. Again, Caleb thinks about how well this sort of thing could do filmed and sold if only he could put aside his anxieties but, like Essek had said, maybe some things are better kept private.

Essek most definitely seems to be enjoying their moment of privacy. Caleb takes him into his mouth, tongue against his slit to lap away the bitter pearl of precome already there just from—watching Caleb react. He fits so well into Caleb’s mouth, better now that they’ve gotten through the dance of testing and the notion of exclusivity. Caleb delights in the taste of him, warm clean skin and the distinct bite of sex, and it feels good, right, to swallow him down, good to feel him so hard so intimately.

It’s better with the dildo filling him at the other end, bizarrely. He’s done things of this nature with Astrid and Wulf before, but this is better, desperate in a different way, even if he still trembles and fights not to squirm, fights not to lose focus on his task. Neither of them have to keep quiet, Caleb groaning around his mouthful as Essek gasps and whimpers, half hidden behind a bit lip. There’s no fear of getting caught, no repercussions to this act beyond sheets in need of a wash and it’s—

Caleb is beyond happy. Essek is too, judging by the way he still pets Caleb, his cheek and shoulders and neck, gentle brushes of one hand as the other holds Caleb’s hair out of the way for him.

And he feels good, too, so very good. Their sex is unhurried, comfortable but electric, pleasure buzzing under Caleb’s skin from the spell Essek’s hands have spun around him. Essek’s fingers pull tighter in Caleb’s hair, guiding him with more intent through the bobbing of his head, silently telling Caleb how he wants to be blown. He shifts the angle of the dildo too, just enough to glance off Caleb’s prostate with nearly every thrust of it. He knows Caleb’s body well and it—

Caleb finally snakes his hand down between his legs to stroke himself, refocusing himself. He’s so very slick at the head and his hand moves over his length with ease, matching the thrusts of the dildo and his head, up and down, in and out, back and forth.

He comes first, pulling tight, halting everything he’s doing as he tips over the edge, softly but with great force. He has to pull his mouth from Essek halfway through, burying his face in the crease of his boyfriend’s thigh as he shudders and groans through his orgasm. Essek thrusts the dildo into him, over and over, the entire time, until Caleb nearly slips on boneless knees to fall into the mess he made.

“Stop, stop, please,” he gasps, his come sticky hand coming up to hold tight to Essek’s hips, anchoring himself as best as he can. The dildo stills, half in him, then slowly slips out. Caleb can feel it thump onto the bed next to his ankle as the taste of magic in the air dissipates. He groans again, flopping over to the side, panting. He’s so very sleepy now, ready to crawl under the sheets and cuddle his boyfriend until they’re too sweaty to touch anymore but Essek—

“Can I come on you?” Essek asks.

Caleb laughs a little, breathless and pleased, his hand across Essek’s lap reaching to stroke Essek’s perfect dick. Essek moans, soft and a little hesitant even still, and the leftover arousal in Caleb’s veins flares again, valiantly trying to warm him once more.

Ja, or in me, if you want.”

Caleb looks up at Essek just in time to see him look dumbfounded, just for the briefest second, and he can’t help the grin that spreads across his face.

“Could I?”

“If you wanted.” Caleb gives him a slow stroke, squeezing Essek, delighted by the way he shivers, eyes fluttering closed. “I’m well prepared, after all.”

Essek laugh a little. “I suppose you are, so I might as well.”

“Put your hard work to use.”

Essek shifts, slipping out from under Caleb’s arms. He bends over Caleb, kissing his cheek then, when Caleb turns his head, craning to look up at him, his lips too, lingering and so full of want.

“So you want me to use your sloppy hole?” Essek jokes and Caleb laughs, rolling the rest of the way onto his back. Essek grins over him, ducks down to kiss him again, tongue sneaking between Caleb’s smiling lips to taste behind his teeth.

“You’re getting better at dirty talk, Schatz.”

Essek winks and slips between Caleb’s spread knees.

“I have a good teacher.”

Essek pressing into him again, his flesh and blood filling Caleb again, is almost too much so soon after his orgasm. Caleb makes a face, grimacing at how good it feels, and Essek pauses until Caleb murmurs, “Please, Liebling, I want you to feel good too.”

Essek pushes the rest of the way in, almost too fast, his face slack with pleasure and awe.

“You always make me feel good,” he sighs, leaning in to kiss Caleb again. Caleb intends to tease Essek further—Then I’ve done my job or something similar—but Essek’s next thrust knocks the wind from Caleb’s lungs. He’s careful still, knowing Caleb’s limits, but relentless, desperate to get off himself. He breathes in Caleb’s shuddering gasps, pushing one of Caleb’s knees closer and closer to his chest, his rhythm fast and even despite the way he pulls tight as he approaches his end.

Caleb moans when a frantic thrust hits him in the prostate, his toes curling. He ventures reaching between them, taking his length in hand. The way Essek’s breath hitches before he groans makes Caleb swell in his fist; not enough to get off again but it feels good, overwhelming to the point where he can’t stop shaking, and it’s thoroughly enjoyable.

When Essek leans back, the hand not on Caleb’s knee coming up to cover his mouth, Caleb knows he’s close. Essek watches him down the length of his pointy nose, chest heaving as his rhythm falters more and more.

“Enjoying yourself, Schatz?” Caleb asks. Essek groans behind his hand, his eyes fluttering closed, a slight hiccup in his thrusts before he doubles down, harder and faster for a moment. His eyebrows pull together as he pushes in a final time, still but for his laboring lungs.

It’s almost a relief when he sighs and pulls out. As much as Caleb wishes he wasn’t, he’s far too old for multiple rounds, and the last few minutes edged too close to that. He’s absolutely exhausted now but pleased with the sated smile Essek shoots down at him before collapsing to the side much the way Caleb did earlier. Caleb stretches his legs out and raises his arm, giving Essek room to burrow against him the way he so often does.

"Mollymauk can never know we actually used their gift," Caleb says, "Or we will never hear the end of it."

Essek strokes his chest and makes a thoughtful noise. "Or perhaps they would have more ideas of how it could be utilized?"

If Caleb weren't thoroughly fucked already, the gleam of mischief in Essek's eye would be enough to spark another round. He groans and throws his arm over his face dramatically. "I have made a monster," he intones.

Essek laughs, the light catching off the tiny fangs of his incisors. "Only as monstrous as you like me to be," he says. "This is your fault, Caleb Widogast." He picks Caleb's other hand up off his stomach to place a kiss upon its back.

"A truly terrible punishment," Caleb agrees with a wink.

Outside, cars rush through the ever-present drizzle of Rexxentrum spring. The sun catches the droplets gathered on the glass, casting dappled shadows across Essek's skin. From where lies against him, Caleb is struck, as always, by how lovely he is, and his heart swells.

"What is it?" Essek asks, shifting his gaze to look out the window.

"Just admiring my boyfriend," Caleb says, reaching over to tease one of Essek's earrings. "He's very handsome, you know." He grins when Essek's ears flush purple.

Essek is quiet for a long moment, a series of increasingly distressed expressions crossing his face, before he sighs and covers it with both hands. "I know I'm supposed to flirt back, but my mind has gone completely blank," he mumbles into his palms.

Caleb laughs. "That's okay. It just means you need more practice. I promise to be a very diligent tutor." He wiggles his eyebrows.

Essek relaxes, snuggling closer, his expression fond. "I look forward to your next lesson."