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tote of a life time

Chapter Text

To say this quaint cafe was popular would have been an outright lie. They all knew it.

Seokmin happened to stumble in one day, desperate to find a toilet. The story is quite the laugh, actually.

He clutched his stomach, face screwed in pain, and approached the blank faced barista in the empty restaurant. He choked out something about needing the bathroom, and the barista sighed. He mumbled something about ‘having to order something first’ and Seokmin groaned.

He had the decency to straighten slightly and look at the small chalkboard menu. His eyes, and bowels, settled on a tote of thirteen cookies with a slight smile that twisted in discomfort again. The worker nodded his head, putting the order in, before handing him a key for the bathroom. Seokmin jumped out of his skin in appreciation, skittering to the bathroom.

Anyway, they came to know this restaurant after he shared the cookies over the story, relishing in their soft and sweet warmth. They were hands-down the best cookies they had all eaten.

Now Hansol came for a different reason.

After the introduction through his friend, he decided to check the place out on his own. The restaurant was wedged between two well known shops, mostly overlooked. Even he had walked past this strip many times, but would never bat an eye at the place. 

This had nothing to do with looks, really. Even the name of the place had a nice ring to it; Shining Diamond. A little cheesy, albeit, but nice nonetheless. The inside was even nice, artsy in a cluttered way that Hansol loved. Stickers all over the walls, the counter, and the back of the register. There were mismatch rugs strewn across the floors, with random chairs and tables all around.

Even the bored boy that dealt with Seokmin was described as lanky, with a black mullet and many earrings.

Peering through the window, being met with the sight of the place, excitement settled in Hansols stomach. Walking in, he glanced around, seeing many college students boring over assignments, bringing a smile to his face. God, he thought, My life is such a movie… It’s crazy, wah.

He looked forward to the counter, where a different boy was making coffee, back turned to Hansol. Hansol strolled forward, glancing between the menu, and the abundant stickers littering the counter. Glancing up, the boy was still turned away. Hansol took in his peachy blonde locks, and lightly colored clothes. He couldn’t say he matched the place, but also wouldn’t say that he didn’t.

When he turned around, coffee in hand, he barely glanced at Hansol, before calling out a name.

It was as if everything was happening in slow motion. 

The boy was… simply put, beautiful. A small focused pout, that smoothly twisted into a sweet smile, adorned his pink lips. Fluffy bangs fell over his round eyes perfectly, begging to be brushed out of the way. His skin was lightly tanned, way more than Hansols at least. 

Hansol managed to brush away the thoughts, removing the flowers that framed the boys face from his mind, when they locked eyes again. His smile turns a little toothy, and Hansol finds himself mirroring him.

”What can I get for you today?” The boy says, voice smooth and sweet as chocolate.

Hansol breaks eye contact, looking at the menu again. He finds that his hands are damp with sweat, but ignores it to stare intently as the neat scrawl of chalk. After a short while, he makes he decision, looking back up, meeting the same brown eyes again.

”One small strawberry lemonade, and a tote of chocolate chip cookies,” He smiles lightly at the grimace that adorns the other boys face. It’s gone quickly as he puts in the order.

”For here, or to go?” He asks.

”To go,” Hansol says, sliding his card across the counter. 

On his way out, Hansol glances back at the boy, making eye contact with him. His breath hitches when he shows him an award winning smile, and he stumbles out, splashing some juice through the lid.


Chapter Text

Hansol had an issue, though the worst part of it was his acknowledgement of said issue, and neglect.

As of current, he was back in the cafe. Far from alone this time.

They were seated this time around, opting for the table in the far back corner. Next to him was Soonyoung, talking merrily to Seokmin from across the table, both leaning over it. Soonyoung leaned against one fist, smooshing his goofy grin into it, other hand grasped loosely around his large mug. Seokmin mirrored his posture, instead picking at their shared large chocolate chip muffin.

Junhui was there too, mumbling words at his phone to unknowingly remind the world of his presence. For the most part he was quiet, the volume of his phone even politely muted. 

The day itself was peaceful. Sunny out with a slight breeze, air thick with the smell of last nights rain. Spring was beautiful. Parks full of vast fields of dewy grass. Flowers blooming, swaying to the tempo of the birds and the bees sweet duet. People out and about, easy smiles on their faces due to the lax atmosphere.

Hansol, however, was on the edge of brooding. 

He truly didn’t (did) know what it was.

He sat hunched over, head placed delicately in his ballerina worthy shaped hand. He had his body facing the rest of the place, Soonyoung and Seokmin inhabiting the corner. The cloud of rain and thunder that hung over his head was in vast contrast to the flowers and stars over the other boys. He’d sigh every now and then, knowingly making his presence, and utter pitiful mood, known.

Eventually Soonyoung’s eye twitches, and Seokmin huffs out a breath, casting a sour look at the side of Hansol’s head. Hansol can feel it, and buzzes with energy, awaiting the question.

”Hansol-ah?” Seokmin calls sweetly. Hansol turns to him with a kicked-puppy expression, and Seokmin softens a little. “What’s wrong kid?”

”What do you mean?” Hansol asks, flicking at a crumb on the table.

”You were so excited to come here earlier,” Seokmin smiles. “And then we got here, and it’s like your attitude changed completely.” Hansol shrugs, pouting.

”Yeah, and when we were ordering, you practically broke your back to try and look inside the kitchen,” Soonyoung scoffs. “Jun had to pull you off the counter what with the way the barista looked at you.”

”It’s nothing, really,” Hansol sighs. Even Jun scoffs, eyes not leaving his phone. “I just thought-“

From there, it’s slow motion again…

The glass door opens with a soft jingle, knocking against the bell tied to a high beam. A haphazard DIY, probably done by a half brained college student. Rushing in is none other than Cafe-Guy himself. His hair is damp with sweat, band tee clinging to his chest. His expression is frantic, though apologetic, as he rushes to the boy behind the counter. The boy in return chuckles lightly at him, accepting his apology hurriedly, and pushing him to get cleaned up.

Hansol straightens up, watching dazedly and happily. He’s here…

”-Thought what, Hansol,” Soonyoung pulls a lock of his hair in frustration, pulling him out of Lala-Land. 

He looks back to his friends, Soonyoung and Seokmin eyeing him warily. Even Jun has an eyebrow raised, looking at him over his screen. 

His face breaks into a triumphant grin, stormy clouds shifting into flowery fields of dancing children. Seokmin even looks at the space above his head bemused, feeling the shift of energy.

”He’s here,” Hansol whispers, channeling his inner actor. This scene is emotional, the director says, So much overwhelming happiness, that you want to cry.

Hansol tears up.

”Bro,” Jun guffaws. “Are you talking about that sweaty guy that just rushed in here? Are you serious about- like- any of this right now?”

Hansol sniffles.

Jun and Seokmin groan, eyes closing tiredly, years of dealing with Hansol catching up to them. Soonyoung blinks at Hansol, reaching a hand up slowly to ruffle his hair messily. 

“Sol-ah,” He says sweetly. Hansol fixes his hair, still riding his emotional high. “How do you know this boy? You seem so lovesick, is he the reason why we came today?”

Hansol sighs dreamily, recounting their first meeting. “I don’t know him, not yet.” Soonyoung frowns. “He’s just so beautiful. And his voice is so sweet.”

Seokmin sighs, and Jun shakes his head, going back to his game. Cafe-Guy leaves the staff room now, taking his place next to the other boy.

They’re visual polar opposites, it’s almost laughable. Cafe-Guy is short, round, and bright. Smiles with all his teeth to customers, wears white shirts! Grey hoodies! and light-wash boyfriend jeans! with sneakers!!

The boy to his left was different. Frowned at customers, sighed audibly, raised eyebrows, with tight lipped smiles that were still somewhat nice. He was all sharp edges. He layered dark clothes over each other. Wore chunky platformed shoes, adding to the lanky tallness. 

Although they didn’t clash with each other. The taller one fixing the other’s bangs, while the other groused about his spiked bracelet. Hansol could hear ‘cliche’ from where he sat, and saw the taller one laugh, swatting at him.

Hansol wanted to laugh with them too, practicing the type of smile he’d do if he heard the joke.

Jun’s face twisted in horror.

Soonyoung laughed. “Go talk to him, bub,” he said. He started picking apart his muffin again, being done with the conversation. Hansol turned to him with a horrified expression, one that only Seokmin caught a glimpse of.

Seokmin sighed at the same time Hansol bursted. “Talk to him, hyung?” He screeched, making Soonyoung flinch, and throw him a nasty look. He looked around the restaurant, seeing that they gathered other’s attentions. “What- What if he doesn’t like me? What if he doesn’t like mediocre Korean-American college students with questionable fashion senses? Hmm? What if he likes punk artsy tall boys?”

Soonyoung sighs, pinching the bridge of his noses. He continues to pick at the muffin. “How can you know that if you don’t talk to him?”

Hansol stands, Soonyoung keeps his gaze down, and Seokmin stares up at him warily. Soonyoung pokes his tongue to his cheek as Hansol comes to stand behind his chair, huffing pitifully. He braces his hands on the back of his chair as Soonyoung begins to look up again.

Hansol yanks on the chair hard, seemingly dragging Seokmin with him, the force of the table forcing breath out his lungs. A glance under the table tells Hansol their legs were entangled. 

Seokmin groans hoarsely, clutching his stomach. Soonyoung gapes, glancing between Hansol and Seokmin. Jun looks up, raising his brow once again at Hansol, before returning to his game again. 

“Hansol, for the love of God, and Seokmin’s ribs, grow up. Go talk to the damn boy, and hurry this process up.” Soonyoung sighs.

Hansol whines one last time. “Fine!” He says. “But if he shoots me down, and I go into hiding, you’re to blame!” He starts walking slowly, pointing a finger at the table.

Soonyoung raises a steady fist. “Fighting!”

Seokmin copies him, words miserably raspy in a way that makes Soonyoung laugh, before he coos and tangles his fingers into his hair lovingly. 

Jun just doesn’t acknowledge his presence. 

He walks slowly to the counter, where his object of affection is standing in boredom. The other boy must be in the staff room. Other patrons throw him shady glances, having pinned him as the causer of todays chaos and destruction. 

When he reaches the counter, the boy looks up at him, face softly confused.

Then he speaks.



”Are you guys, like, okay?”

Chapter Text

“Huh?” Comes Hansols immediate reply.

He pulls a very convincing face, in his opinion. Brows furrowed, lips pouting, and hands fumbling at the hood on his jacket, naturally fixing it.

”Your table,” He says. He points in said direction, craning to look at it. Hansol mirrors him, watching Soonyoung still card his fingers through Seokmin’s hair. They make eye contact, and Soonyoung immediately turns away, staring at the wall. 

The boy clears his throat. “You guys were loud a few seconds ago.”

”Oh, that?” Hansol snorts, throwing his thumb over his shoulder. “We’re, um, practicing for a community play?”

He perks up, mouth hanging open. “Really? I love plays!” He smiles so widely and happily, one that Hansol guiltily mirrors. “What’s it about, I don’t think I recognize it.”

Hansol sighs, hands braced on the counter as he hangs his head in shame. “I lied, there’s no play, I’m really sorry. I swear I don’t normally lie like this, it’s just been an off day.”

Hansol began his inner monologue, lifting his head with his eyes squeezed shut, face turned to the ceiling.

What a bad day it was, his voice narrated. Just yesterday I was so childishly happy. Relishing in the warmth and happiness of friends. But now here I am. Completely and utterly pathetic.

When he allows himself to look down again, the boy is just staring. His expression is half mortified and half amused. A smile begins blooming on his face.

”You’re funny,” He laughs. Hansol doesn’t really remember telling a joke, everything is a bit hazy, so he just offers his thanks. “And a little weird.” 

It’s like the world is ending. Hansol seizes his heart, eyes downcast again. He can almost feel the dam breaking, creaking pitifully in his mind. He begins to think of deserted places he could move to. What would he bring? Oh! This is kind of fun. Like a game of 20 questions on the first date. What to bring, what to br-

“And really cute,” The boy adds. 

Hansol can hear the loud crack in his neck at the speed it snaps up again. The boy is looking at him a little shyly, though there’s a definite smugness hidden in the lopsided smile. The look helps to prove that what he heard wasn’t imagined.

It’s not even a stroke to his ego.

It’s like the longest rub of the century. It’s immediate, the way he straightens up confidently. He shifts his weight to his right hand, other one going to his hip.

The boy giggles. 

“I’m Seungkwan,” he says. He offers his hand in a handshake, one that Hansol happily takes in his own. His hands are pretty and dainty in comparison to Hansols.

”I’m Hansol,” he says back. They release each other, and Hansols hand flies the back of his neck nervously. “I know we just met, and all, but can I get your number?”

”Hmm…,” Seungkwan hums. He picks at an old, peeled sticker under his fingers, thinking of his answer. Hansol pulls his top lip between his teeth, an unattractive tic that’s slowly becoming his go-to. “Not yet.”

Hansol blinks.

The boy chuckles. “Maybe if I see you around more, but I don’t normally give mine out.”


”Was that all, or were you going to buy something?”



Mingyu sat on a bated breath. His brow was furrowed ever so slightly, lips parted. His hand hovered calmly in the air, moving as Mingyu instructed it to.

Wonwoo sat across from him, eyes flitting from the cards, Mingyu’s hand, Mingyu’s face, and his own hands. 

This was one healthy thing to be jealous of, Mingyu not having the same tremor issue that Wonwoo does. When Mingyu discovered it, he held Wonwoos hands in his bigger ones, smoothing over his knuckles in fascination. Even now, his fingers shake in anticipation. A silent apartment on a random weekend always meant weird activities. Today just happened to be card towers.

Mingyu’s hand lowered ever so slightly, ready to place the card down. Breathing growing slower, eyes narrowing, Wonwoo leaning closer…

Hansol bursts through the door of the apartment, door slamming loudly against the wall. 

The cards were a mess all over the floor and coffee table. Mingyu stared blankly, mouth closed now, hand still hovering in the air. Wonwoo blinked a couple of times, looking around, adjusting his glasses. When Mingyu’s eye twitched, Wonwoo sighed and looked at Hansol. He was posed dramatically as usual, one hand placed meticulously on his forehead, the other on his hip holding a paper tote bag.

“Guys,” Hansol began. “What do you think of me?”

They now stared at him silently. Mingyu was scowling nastily, while Wonwoo genuinely thought of his answer.

Hansol was very dramatic, yes, but they all loved him. He was funny, and caring, and so talented it still amazed them all sometimes. Wonwoo liked to think he took Hansol under his wing, being older and all, but Hansol exuded a certain type of confidence that proved otherwise. 

He met Hansol and Mingyu in college, both younger than him, but so much more outgoing. Mingyu was the type of ‘kind’ that really surprises you. He’s a giant, but he’s gentle and clumsy. He fucks up a lot, but he always fixes it himself with genuine consideration. They both dragged him out a lot. Not necessarily to parties, just anything to make sure he was getting enough human interaction to function. He appreciated them even in these childish moments.

Mingyu eventually sighed, and began cleaning up the mess.

”I can probably tell you how Mingyu feels about you right now,” Wonwoo supplies after a minutes. Hansol ignores him, beginning to pace, but it brings a small smile to Mingyu’s face.

”It’s just that,” Hansol starts. His pose his rigid, looking at the ceiling in a deep, judgmental thought. “I happen to think I’m quite the catch.”

Mingyu groans, standing with the packaged cards. “Please, Hansol. Just once can we go one month without these moments.”

Hansol ignores him again.

”I mean; my hair is usually very nice, I’ve got decent clothing, I’m often times funny.” He curls his finger under his chin, face twisted in consideration. “There’s gotta be something wrong with me-“

”Bingo!” Mingyu calls out.

”Right on the money!” Wonwoo joins.


”Why are you guys shouting?” Hansol fixes them with a genuinely confused look, cutting through their laughter. Mingyu sighs again, turning to place the cards on the counter. “Anyways, I brought back cookies. Help yourself, I’m taking a nap.”

He places the bag next to cards, and strolls to his room. Wonwoo stands to watch him leave while Mingyu sits and opens the bag. Wonwoo joins him, taking the offered cookie.

He watches Mingyu eat the cookie silently, eyebrows raising at the taste. 

“Sorry you didn’t get to finish the tower,” He says. Mingyu grunts, somewhat over it. “We can probably do it again next weekend or something.”

Wonwoo begins carding his fingers through Mingyu’s hair. He starts munching on his cookie, watching the way Mingyu’s eyes slide shut, slumping in the stool. The cookie is really good.

Mingyu often called Wonwoo a cat, most of his mannerisms lining up with one. But times like these Wonwoo saw it in Mingyu more so than himself. Face drooping tiredly, moving around for Wonwoo’s hands to find certain spot in his scalp. It’s a little ridiculous, but it’s so sweet that it makes Wonwoo wanna laugh while crying.

The light was hitting him perfectly, too. Mingyu was just so handsome. He once told Wonwoo that he stares too much, but it just made him smile and stare harder. 

Whatever. It’s not like Mingyu didn’t stare back.

”Maybe,” Mingyu mumbles.

Chapter Text

Hansol sat silently, face twisted in thought as he tapped his ring against the side of his beer.

”You’re so pretty,” Soonyoung coos drunkenly. His chin rests on Seokmin’s shoulder, gazing dreamily at him.

”Me?” Seokmin asks softly. Soonyoung mumbles something of a ‘yes’. “Thank you, Soonie. You are too.”

Soonyoung giggles deliriously, smooshing his face in Seokmins neck. Hansol finally sighs, setting his drink on the coffee table while the two laugh to themselves. A quick look at his phone tells him it’s 10:30 pm.

“What’s up?” Mingyu calls to him. He’s seated on the floor in front of Wonwoo, leaning against his legs.

”I, uh,” Hansol runs a hand through his hair. “Seokmin hyung?”

Said man looks up with a distracted smile. 

“Do you know how long the cafe is open for?”

”I can’t say I do?” He frowns, furrowing his brow. “Maybe 11 or something. It’s near a college campus anyhow. Why?”

”Just wanted some great cookies!” Hansol exclaims. He grabs his jacket, ruffles Soonyoungs hair, and grabs his keys.

Seokmin scoffs as Hansol rushes out of the apartment.

The cool night air is a welcome feeling on Hansols face, racing through the streets. He could feel his face aching with the force of his smile. He feels so loopy, heart racing with so much joy.

When he reaches Shining Diamond, he almost screams in relief when he still sees the lights on. He peers into the window, placing his hand on the cool glass to help him chill. Inside is Seungkwan. Only Seungkwan, from what he can see.

He’s wiping idly at the counter with a ratty rag. His mouth opens and closes, and Hansol registers the slight vibration of the glass. He’s playing music, God, he’s so cute.

He’s got on huge round glasses, those of which he keeps adjusting. He’s wrapped up in a huge colorful sweater, with baggy jeans covered in patterned patches.

Did Hansol mention how cute he was?

He knocks on the glass a few times. Seungkwan flinches slightly, before looking at the window in confusion.

It’s true they’re still open, but Hansol didn’t want to barge in, no matter how much he actually did want to. Plus, it’s worth it to see the amused grin blossoming on his face. He tilts his head teasingly and approaches the window.

”Can i come in?” Hansol mouths, taking the other boys appearance in up close. 

Seungkwan tilts his head again, tapping a finger on his chin in thought. Hansol is still panting, but he can’t help but smile. Seungkwan shrugs, and heads to the door, Hansol trailing after him.

The door opens with a soft jingle, soft music spilling out into the otherwise quiet night. They stare at each other awkwardly for a second before Seungkwan moves out of the way, gesturing him to come in.

He steps in, raising his shoulders and breathing in like he walked into his house. Hansol thinks he’s doing a good job at portraying an awkward house guest. He sees this a lot in the movies.

”Make yourself at-,” Seungkwan stops himself. He looks at the ceiling with a slight pout, wringing his fingers tightly. “Ah, sit. I guess.”

Hansol chuckles and sits at the table closest to the counter. 

“So, what brings you around, Hansol? To what do I owe this unexpected visit?” Seungkwan glances at him. He dips the rag into a bucket, and wrings it out before wiping at the back counter.

”Just, yaknow, wanted to come?” He questions himself. Seungkwan raises a brow at him. “Though I do need to bring home a bag of cookies.”

”Ah, the cookies,” Seungkwan laughs. “What is up with you guys and those cookies?”

”Bro, don’t even get me started,” Seungkwan laughs again. “No, seriously. They are unnaturally good. Have you not had them before?”

”I can’t say I have. I haven’t had anything from here.”

”You’re missing out, my friends love this place. You guys have bangin food.”

Hansol questions himself for his word choice, but Seungkwan overlooks it, opting instead to lean against the back counter and scrutinize him.

”Speaking of your friends, who are they?”

”Hmm,” Hansol looks off to the side. “Well, there’s Seokmin, Soonyoung, and Junhui. Seok and Soon are dating, have been for years. Junhui is older than all of us. He’s from China.”

Seungkwan hums, taking in the information. “My coworker, Minghao, he said something about Junhui. Something about how he seemed the most normal?”

Hansol scoffs.

”Far from it, actually,” Seungkwan snorts. “He was just distracted by his phone that day. He’s just as bad as the rest of us.”

”Ah, it must’ve been because he pulled you off the counter, or something,” Seungkwan says lightly. He smirks when Hansol colors.

”That?” Hansol sputters. “He was just- yaknow- it’s- that was nothing.”

Seungkwan laughs again, moving with the rag and bucket to the tables in the far corner. “Whatever you say,” he teases over his shoulder.

He scowls, putting his feet up on the table and leaning back into his seat. They lapse into a collective silence, letting the music talk for them. Seungkwan is focused on cleaning and humming, while Hansol is focused on Seungkwan cleaning and humming. He doesn’t let his gaze stray away from him.

He knows this is his worst trait, staring silently. It’s made many uncomfortable before. He doesn’t care though. He stares because he cares! 

And when he meets Seungkwans eyes, it’s not like there’s anything he can do to look away. Seungkwan doesn’t try very hard to look away either . He does though, getting started on the last table near Hansol.

When Seungkwan reaches his table after stacking the chairs on the previous one, he smacks his lips. 

“Aish,” he hisses, pushing Hansols feet off lightly. Hansol lets him, but still whines all the same. “Already causing a ruckus?”

”The table was already dirty,” Hansol explains. He pouts, crossing his arms and pointedly ignoring Seungkwans teasing smile.

”Alright, alright. No need to get all upset.”

”I’m not upset!”

”Right, because this is how someone acts when they’re not upset.”

”It is!” Hansol exclaims. “I’ve seen it before!”

Seungkwan just laughs, finishing off the table. Hansol stands, helping him with the chairs. When done, Seungkwan goes into the staff room with the bucket and rag. He returns shortly, drying his empty hands off with a napkin.

”Now for your cookies, yeah?” Seungkwan laughs when Hansol nods excitedly. 

Seungkwan prepares the bag, slipping in an extra cookie. He slides it across the counter when Hansol slides across his card.

”Ah, it’s on the house,” Seungkwan smiles. Hansol raises a brow.

”Nah, I can pay. I made you work longer than necessary.” Seungkwan shakes his head lightly, rolling his eyes.

”You made work more fun than necessary. Seriously, it’s on the house.”

”Let me pay, dawg. I’ll even let you have one.”

”I don’t want you to pay. Nor do I want one.”

”Well, I want to pay, and I want you to have one.”

Seungkwan breathes deeply.

”Fine,” he grits out. There’s a smile on his face as he picks up Hansols card. Hansol happily opens up the cookie bag, exchanging one for his card. He stares expectantly at Seungkwan, who sighs in exasperation before taking a bite of the cookie.

His eyes widen almost immediately, chewing slowing down before speeding up again. Hansol laughs as he struggles to actually savor the taste.

”Good, right?”

”Fuck yeah,” he groans. Hansol laughs louder, eyes widening comically at the boy. “God, what do they put in these things?”

”I imagine it was handcrafted by God themself,” Hansol says seriously and Seungkwan nods vigorously. “But shouldn’t I be asking you that?”

”Bruh, I just make the coffee here,” He sweeps the fallen crumbs into his hand. “Minghao usually does the behind the scenes stuff.”

Hansol hums. “Is it just you guys?”

”Usually?” He tilts his head, brow furrowed at the wall. “I mean, there are other workers, but him and I have the most free time to spend here.”

He nods in understanding. “Are you done for tonight then?” 

“Yes, actually,” He breathes out tiredly. “I live upstairs though, so I’ll walk you out.”

Hansols eyebrows shoot up. “Seriously?”

Seungkwan laughs. “Yeah. Minghaos family owns this place, and I’ve know him since college, so we room together up there.”

”That’s awesome…,” Hansol gapes at him. “Very movie like.”

”Thank you, thank you,” Seungkwan bows to the fake crowd, waving as Hansol starts applauding. “It’s pretty nice. Now, I want to go to bed, so I’m kicking you out.”

Hansol laughs, letting Seungkwan lead him out. When they reach the door, he looks at him, smiling.

”See you around?” He says opening the door.

Seungkwan smiles back. “See you around.”


Chapter Text

“Thank you guys for coming with me, seriously,” Hansol pants. He’s walking backwards, facing a wary looking Mingyu and a bored looking Wonwoo.

”Yeah, yeah, I still don’t know why we had to,” Mingyu mumbles.

Hansol just scoffs.

It’s true, they didn’t really have to. It was just some regular day, a nice afternoon, and a clear schedule. 

They didn’t have to come, but they could. Hansol wanted them to. He lives with them, yeah, but they rarely go out together much.

Hansol didn’t even need them for moral support. He’d been dropping by at late hours almost everyday. They don’t do much, just talking, but talking is good. Hansol likes talking. Luckily, Seungkwan does too. Can talk up a storm when he wants.

They spend a long time arguing about unpopular opinions, popular opinions, and even made up ones. 

‘So… who do you think invented earth?’

’… I’m genuinely so close to kicking you out.’

Minghao started joining them a few times. Hansol figures he isn’t as dark and brooding as he thought, high pitched giggles filling the cafe. Hansol likes him. He’s cool, and he cares about Seungkwan a lot, giving him stern looks whenever he stalls after finishing cleaning. He isn’t always with them, but whenever he is, it’s a good time.

They have fun. Hansol loves the music that Seungkwan plays. Bonus points for getting to hear him sing along, blessing Hansols ears with his heavenly voice. When he first heard it, Seungkwan randomly belting along to the song that was playing, he fell out of his chair. He rounded on Seungkwan, words of praise flying out of his mouth. All Seungkwan could do was deny, deny, deny, pretending to busy himself with recleaning the same table.

Hansol just… hasn’t gotten his number yet. Honestly, he’s too scared to even ask. He’s been around a lot, he’s honestly waiting for Seungkwan to give it to him himself. He’s patient. 

Patient enough.

”Jesus, Hansol, be careful,” Wonwoo raises his hands to steady him. Hansol laughs bashfully, remembering he’s still walking backward.


”You we’re in Lala Land again,” Mingyu says. He’s teasing, and oh Hansol would love to wipe that smug smile off his face.

”Yeah, thanks Mingyu. Thank you for telling me,” Hansol says smartly. Mingyu just scowls at him.

”Calm down, boys, we’re here,” Wonwoo sighs. 

Hansol sticks his tongue out before turning to open the door. He catches Wonwoo holding Mingyu back in the corner of his eye. Before he opens it, he turns to them again with a guarded look.

”This place is sacred, okay? I don’t want to hear any teasing,” Hansol says seriously.

”Aye, aye, Captain,” Mingyu salutes. Wonwoo crosses his heart with a lazy finger. He figures that’s the best he’ll get, and turns around to finally open it.


That bell has swiftly become Hansols favorite noise, turning into his characters main theme. He looks around with a distracted look, mostly gauging the other boys reactions to the atmosphere. So far so good.

”Hi, what can I get for you today?” A voice calls to him.

”Hi, just one-“ Hansol looks up. “JUN?”

The boy in turn grins widely and mischievously. He’s behind the counter, wearing a workers nametag. Minghao is facing away from them, working at the back counter. Though he glances back at the commotion, and smiles before looking away again.

”Ah, Jun. I didn’t know you worked here?” Wonwoo greets. They exchange a handshake while Hansol still gapes at him comically.

”Just started actually,” Jun shrugs. He exchanges a similar handshake with Mingyu while they start looking at the menu.

”Got any suggestions?” Mingyu says, squishing his lip between his fingers.

”Besides the cookies?” Jun snorts. “Really anything. I’d suggest going with your heart, everything is great.”

Minghao hums in appreciation, and Jun smiles without looking at him. 

“Geez, Hansol, close your mouth,” Jun tuts. He reaches over, lifting his jaw up.

Hansol blinks.

Then turns to Minghao.

”Where’s Seungkwan?”

Minghao snorts, then shoves a thumb up toward the ceiling.

”He’s a little under the weather,” he sighs. “Dude has been overworking himself blindly. Before you ask about Junhui, that’s the reason he was hired. We need more people with free time.”

Jun raises his hand. “That’s me. All I do is play on my phone.”

”Yeah, yeah, whatever dingus,” Hansol sighs. Jun giggles goofily. “Can I see him?”

Minghao raises a challenging eyebrow. “Why?”

”Because I wanna,” Hansol whines. Minghao rolls his eyes. 

“Whatever, don’t bother him too much, he does actually need rest.” He tosses him keys, and points in the direction of the staff room. “The door to our apartment is the only white one.”

Hansol screams in joy, making Mingyu flinch, Minghao and Wonwoo sigh, and Jun smile like an excited puppy. He races behind the counter, dodging Minghao, who looks regretful of everything. 

He pushes his way through the ‘staff only’ door, and whips his head around wildly, looking for the white door. He spots something, and rounds on it before skidding to a stop. After a short inspection, he figures it’s a fridge, and decides it’s the wrong door. Shortly look around again, he spots a white wooden door, and fumbles with the keys.

After jamming the correct ones into the locks, he trips up the stairs, excitement coming back to bite him. He reaches another door, and grumbles before knocking on it instead.

He swings the keys around his fingers, panting as he hears Seungkwan stumbling to the door. His heart quickens when he hears the door unlocking.

As the door swings open, a slight swoosh rushes through Seungkwans bangs, and Hansol can’t help but smile at the sight of him.

His hair is tousled with sleep, eyes only slightly awake. His round cheeks somehow rounder, fixing him with a confused pout. He’s wrapped in a huge fluffy knit blanket, fingers entangled in it to keep it on him. 

“Hansol?” He drawls. His voice is thick and scratchy with sleep, making Hansol smile wider. “What are you doing up here? How…”

He holds up his hand, palm facing Seungkwan, showing the keys hanging off his middle finger. Seungkwan raises an impressed eyebrow. “Minghao let me up.”

”Well,” Seungkwan starts. He struggles with words, head cloudy with exhaustion. “Why?”

Hansol snorts softly. “Well, I wanted to see you, firstly,” Seungkwan reddens, looking at the ground. “But also, Jun was down there. It freaked me out a bit. He was standing there menacingly.”

Seungkwan laughs, bright and happy, though a little raspy. “Yeah, I bet. He’s a lifesaver though.” Hansol nods thoughtfully.

”Better be,” he mutters. Seungkwan swallows before moving to the side slightly.

”Did you, um, want to come in?” Hansols eyes widen. He completely forgot that this would happen. “You don’t have to, you can go back down.”

”Nah, nah, I want to,” Hansol nods enthusiastically. He steps in through the space Seungkwan made. As Seungkwan shuts the door softly, he does the movie thing again. Breathe in, raise your shoulders, look around, make a fist, and then… ever so slightly… shake out your hands…

And scene. Perfect execution!

”I’ve practically been knocked out all day,” Seungkwan says. He slinks into the kitchen, the tail of the blanket following after him. “Honestly, you’re doing me a favor. I hate sleeping in.”

”Glad to help.”

Hansol finally actually takes in the apartment. It’s old, that’s it’s most obvious feature. It’s got grand doorways, with crown moldings, carved carefully and beautifully. The living room and kitchen open into each other, dark wood floors colliding with white tiles. They’ve mismatched thrifted furniture all over the place, matching the restaurant downstairs.

Theres a large old couch in the living room. It’s brown and thick and looks like the most heavenly place to nap. To the side of it, there’s a beautiful victorian lounge seat angled slightly to the TV. In the middle of it all there’s a round coffee table placed thoughtfully on an artful old rug. On the right side of the wall there are two large windows, cracked open to let the breeze sweep through the sheer curtains.

The kitchen is just was breathtaking. High ceilings complement the place well. 

The cabinets are a light sage green, marble white counters sitting atop them. There’s an island fit with a sink, where Seungkwan rinses out a mug. Three counter stools sit in front of it, funky colors adding character to the old place. 

Down the hall are a few closed doors, one cracked open slightly. Likely Seungkwans.

Hansol groans. He slinks over to Seungkwan, who arches a brow at him. “What?” He laughs when Hansol pouts.

”You guys are so cool,” he whines. Seungkwan snorts, turning around to make coffee. “I mean- look at this place.”

”I have, thanks,” He teases. He motions at the coffee, a silent question, and Hansol shakes his head no. “The place is cool, yeah, but it’s old. It gets cold quickly. And hot. It’s a losing game.” 

Hansol hums. “I get it, I’ve just got a thing for old houses.”

”Me too. I love this place, but nothing’s ever easy, Sol-ah,” He says.

The nickname slips past his lips easily, making Hansol smile, and pick at his nails. They lapse into a comfortable silence. Hansol slides into the stool closest to him and let’s his eyes drift around. The only noise is the bubbling coffee, creaking wood, and then the scraping of a spoon across a mug. Hansol slightly glances at Seungkwan when he takes the stool next to him, breathing into his coffee.

Hansol doesn’t feel bored, listening to the occasional sipping of the other boy, but he must look it.

”You really can go back down, yaknow?” He mumbles. His voice is a little clearer.

”I told you, Kwan, I want to be here,” he smiles, looking at his ears coloring. He won’t meet his eyes, but Hansol doesn’t mind.

”Yeah, yeah, whatever.” And then it’s silent again. 

Hansols fingers started playing with the blanket. The fabric is startlingly soft, and he begins kneading it, catching Seungkwans attention. He smiles at the action, but doesn’t comment on it, focusing on finishing his drink. 

The door creaks open some time later, Minghao peaking his head in. He smiles softly when they both turn to him. 

“Mingyu and Wonwoo are about to leave,” He says.

Hansol sighs, but nods his head and stands. Minghao slinks out, leaving the door cracked open. He turns back to Seungkwan, who’s already looking at him. 

“I’ll see you?” Hansol smiles easily. Seungkwan smiles back, a little stiffly, so Hansol turns around.


Seungkwan grasps Hansols wrist loosely. Hansol turns back around puzzled.

”Give me your phone real quick.”

Chapter Text

On that fateful night, the first thing Hansol did was text Seungkwan, assuring his safe arrival home. The whole way home, Hansol was vibrating with energy, held in Wonwoos embrace to keep him from running. He had tried already, but tripped and fell, Wonwoo holding onto him when they caught up.

Mingyu and Wonwoo had kept exchanging glances over his head and at him. He kept bouncing while he walked, chewing on his lip anxiously. Mingyu and Wonwoo distracted themselves, filling Hansol in on what went down in the restaurant. It was mostly boring to him, but he picked up a few interesting things. Like how Minghao colored when Jun said that something drew him into applying for the job.

Mingyu eventually sighs and asks Hansol what’s wrong. He bursts again, words spewing quickly from his mouth as he talks about Seungkwan.

A beat of silence.

Then Mingyu laughs, and pats his back appraisingly. Wonwoo gives his word of congratulations, smiling lazily but genuinely.

When they made it home, Hansol giggled deliriously, slipping from Wonwoos grasp to dash to his room. He clutches his phone like a holy object, flopping onto his bed. They exchanged many texts that night, talking as easily as they usually did.

They continued to talk constantly after that. Texting throughout the day whenever Seungkwan could get his hands on his phone. Hansol lessened his nightly visits, but made sure to whenever he could. He’d still show up during the day with Seokmin and Soonyoung, occasionally Mingyu and Wonwoo. 

They all got close after that, what with Jun as an official Shining Diamond employee, and Hansols new favorite person. It was bound to happen over the weeks. 

June rolls by, and Hansol wakes up to texts from Seungkwan.

From: Hit the Kwan-

gm hansollie

i woke up to hao having a tiny freak out in the kitchen lol

did u know he likes jun?

anyway his bday is coming up, as u prob know, and hao wants to do something

are u guys down?

Hansol smiles at the array of message, skin warming from the sun peaking through his window. He drags a hand down his face, and then back up to run through his hair.

To: Hit the Kwan

ill have to check with the others but they’d prob agree anyway

i kinda figured with the crush thing tho

also we should include soon-hyung in it. we usually do since seokmin and him take a few days for… themselves

good morning too, btw

He turns his phone off, sitting up and stretching. He pockets it in his sweats after he stands, slinking into the hallway and then into the bathroom. The smell of breakfast seeps into his sense, hidden under the mint of his toothpaste.

When he steps into the living area, he greets the other two men. Mingyu’s leaning over the stove with a focused glare, one hand on his hip. His head slightly moves to the music from the speaker Wonwoo has hooked up to his phone. Wonwoo sits at the counter, watching Mingyu work with endless interest. They both manage a greeting toward him, and Hansol sits on the couch.

He pulls his phone out again.

From: Hit the Kwan

ah that makes sense, joint parties.

also hao wants to know cake or cupcakes

or pie, jesus

he’s leaning over my shoulder

”Hi Hansol,” Hansol doesn’t react. “Ah he’s just like me now, always on his phone.”

Hansol glances up at Jun, giving him the attention he wants. 

“How’d you get in, freak?” He pushes at his shoulder when he tries to peak at his phone.

”Good morning to you too,” he grumbles. “Through an invitation, I’ll have you know,” He raises his chin defiantly.

”He actually kind of just showed up,” Wonwoo calls from the kitchen.

”We felt obligated to let him in. Being his birthday month, and all,” Mingyu says.

Hansol snickers at the hurt expression on his face. 

“You kids have no respect,” He sinks in the couch cushion, getting distracted by the TV Hansol didn’t know was on.

To: Hit the Kwan

maybe cake and cupcakes? being a joint and all

joint party

not a regular



is it gonna be at ur place? pls say it is, i need to see it again

From: Hit the Kwan


ur weird

wanna help with planning? you know them better

To: Hit the Kwan



mingyus calling me for breakfast

bye bye

He reads Seungkwans own departing message, before pocketing the phone again. He ignores Juns wiggling eyebrows and grabs his plate of food with a smile of thanks.

”I have a question,” Hansol raises his other hand. They fix him with raised eyebrows, and Mingyu eyes his raised hand with a smirk. “What do you guys think about having Juns, and Soonyoungs, birthday party at Seungkwans place?”

Jun slowly starts smiling. The other two shrug, allowing Jun to make the final decision. 

“Ah, I love my precious little friends,” Jun sniffles. He brings Hansol into a hug, jostling his plate. He grimaces when he nuzzles his cheek into Hansols shoulder, making the other two laugh.

”You’re so dramatic,” Hansol grumbles. Jun replies with a smack of his lips.



Hansols standing outside the cafe, bouncing in place. The shop is closed today, but he’s waiting for Seungkwan. He’s nervous. It’s not a date, but it’s the first time they’ve gone out together, usually residing in the comfort of the restaurant. The first time he’d been in their apartment had been the last. No real reason, but it’s fine.

Today Seungkwan and him are going party supply shopping, as he had put it. Hansol wanted to dress a little nicely for today, nerves getting to him. Mingyu and Wonwoo helped him pick out gray jeans, a band tee, and his cleanest sneakers. ‘Casual’, as they had put it. After forcing him to put his tuxedo away, claiming that it was ‘too formal’ and ‘weird’. Whatever.

He’s picking absentmindedly at a loose thread when he hears the familiar jingle.

”Hi hi!” Seungkwan calls. He’s got cuffed blue jeans on, and a hoodie, from what Hansol can tell. He’s facing the door as he locks it. 

“Hey, Boo,” Hansol replies. He smiles to himself at the red that blooms on the other boys neck. “Took you long-“

The joke would’ve been stupid anyway, Hansol didn’t wait long at all. But Seungkwan turns around, and Hansol sees the band printed on his hoodie. It’s the hoodie version of what Hansols got on. Seungkwan laughs, loud, bubbly, and happily. They’re matching.

His roommates are psychics…

”That’s fun,” Seungkwan muses, with a quirked eyebrow. Hansol nods, transfixed on the hoodie. “Aish, come on then.” 

He grabs Hansols wrist loosely and leads them down the street.

And if Hansol slips out of his grasp to hold his hand instead, no one needs to know…



Hansols contemplating heavily between two different sets of paper plates. One says ‘Happy Birthday!’ while the other says ‘Have a happy birthday!’. He just can’t choose…

One is a classic, but it’s tired. He hears it all the time, especially on his birthday. The other is interesting, new, exciting! But it’s also weird. It’s something you say in passing. It feels forgetful, clumsy, and not as genuine.

He feels Seungkwan lean over his shoulder, pressing into him to see what he’s looking at.

”Ah, tough decision?” He asks. Hansol replies with a slightly distracted grumble, glaring at the plates. “Go with the original one. The other one is weird.”

”That’s what I was thinking!” Hansol exclaims. He looks at him with wide eyes, making him laugh. “Great minds, right?” Seungkwan hums.

”Same wavelengths.”

Hansol tosses the plates in their cart, turning to put the other ones back on the shelf. Seungkwan grabs matching cups before returning to steer the cart. They stroll down the aisles, Hansol tossing random things in the cart, while Seungkwan puts them back. Hansols never been party supply shopping, so he’s just guessing for the most part.

Seungkwan seems like a pro, saying that they don’t need a kiddy pool or fireworks. He’s so cool in moments like these when Hansol feels silly and loopy like a kid. He’s cool about it, playing around with him, but still putting some kind of stern foot down.

”Okay, I think we’re done here,” Seungkwan gives the cart a once over. They’ve got plates, cups, napkins, balloons, streamers, and candles. Hansol gives his nod, and they step up to pay.



The nice thing about Seungkwan is that he cares. Cares when he doesn’t really need to. When they finished paying, Seungkwan asked if Hansol needed to buy gifts. Hansol did, but said he could it on a later date, they still had a week until the party. Seungkwan just shushed him and dragged him to different stores, asking what they liked.

”Well, they’re both dancers,” Hansol supplied. Seungkwan dragged him to a shoe store. 

Seungkwan even bought them gifts himself. Feeling too awkward to buy them nice shoes like Hansol did, he opted for small things. Small things like scented candles, hand held fans, and large water bottles. Hansol couldn’t stop gazing at him, being so considerate of people he wasn’t even that close to. They were friends, yeah, but it was still kind of recent. 

Hansol whispered to him how awesome he was that night, inhaling the tangerine scent that was so devastatingly familiar. Seungkwans arms tightened around him at the feel of his breath against his ear. Seungkwan leaned back, leaving his embrace to search his face instead. Hansol sat still, letting his own eyes wander. 

Then he kissed him on the cheek, and ran in the building with his bags.

Chapter Text

Hansol clutches the ice cream tub harder, lip quivering.

”-and he’s so cute,” he sobs. “He calls me ‘Hansollie’ and ‘Sol-ah’”

”We call you that too,” Soonyoung mumbles, rubbing his knee in comforting circles.

“Yeah but you’re not… cute.”

Soonyoung opens his mouth to speak, but Seokmin cuts him off with a hand. Mingyu snickers into Wonwoos shoulder, who watches the situation calmly.

“Hansol, what even happened?” Seokmin asks again. They’ve been asking the same question over and over again, Hansol whining about how cute Seungkwan was instead of answering.

”He… kissed me,” Hansol mutters.

”You guys kissed?” Soonyoung shouts.

”No, I said he kissed me,” he grumbles. Soonyoung furrows his brows. “We were hugging, and then he kissed me on the cheek and ran away.”

”Aw,” Mingyu coos against Wonwoo. “It’s like puppy love.” Wonwoo smiles softly, leaning further into him.

Hansol glares halfheartedly at them.

”Wait, so,” Seokmin furrows his brows, calculating things in his head. “What’s the actual problem? Did you not want him to?”

”It’s not that I didn’t want him to,” Hansol whines, shoveling ice cream into his mouth. He has a hard time speaking now. “It’s that it confused me. I’m easily confused.”

Seokmin softens, patting down Hansols disheveled hair. “What confused you, honey?”

”I think,” Hansol starts. He looks around, catching their careful expressions. They’re eyeing him like he’s precious. They care. “I’ve never gotten this far, yaknow? I really like him, but I’ve never really liked someone this much and been this close to… something..?”

They nod, smiling at him.

”I dunno,” he mumbles. “I… I don’t want this to be something silly.”

“Hansol, let me ask you something,” Mingyu calls. Hansol looks up at him. “He’s sweet on you?”

”I mean… yeah.”

”Jokes around with you?”


Mingyu smiles. “Sounds like us, Hansol.”

”Yeah, but it’s different. You know it’s different,” he grumbles.

”Yeah, I do. I know a lot.”


”Should we tell him?” Soonyoung asks, turning to them. They all shake their heads with knowing smiles. He turns back to him, grin shifting into something softer. He ruffles his hair back to its original mess. “You’ll figure it out kid.”



Figure what out…

The whole conversation has been ringing in his head for days. Shortly after it, Seungkwan texted him, asking for his help on the 10th. The party would be later that night, them setting up earlier in the day together.

And that’s what they were doing. 

Hansol helped him dig out an old foldable table to put against the wall behind the sofa. He passed him an equally old table cloth, both coughing and laughing at the dust that enters their lungs. 

“Is everything old here?” Hansol teases.

”Everything except for the body in the basement.” Hansol guffaws. “Sorry.”

Minghao was in the restaurant kitchen, bustling around with final preparations in mind. When Hansol strolled in and saw the frantic look on his face, he retreated slowly, pretending he saw nothing. Asking Seungkwan about it, he said he keeps bakery goods separate from homemade meals, and was anxious about today.

Hansol opened up the pack of paper plates, stacking them neatly on the table. Seungkwan was milling around, straightening things up, wiping surfaces, sweeping. Anything. When he was done, he approached the focused Hansol, who was meticulously angling the napkins. He placed a hand on his bicep, his skin immediately vibrating at the feel.

”Done yet?” His sweet voice mutters.

Hansol looks at him. His eyes a chocolatey brown and round, gazing up at him softly and he’s got an amused tick to his pink lips.

Hansol hums, still staring at him. Seungkwan stares back.

Hansols been through things like this before, but whenever this happens in the movies, he looks away and cringes. He feels frozen in spot when it happens to him, though.

”Okay,” Minghao calls, kicking the door open. Hansols attention snaps to him, still as disheveled as before. “I’m finally done.”

He places the cupcakes on the tablecloth, and clambers out to get the cake. The cupcakes vary in flavors and Hansols mouth waters. There’s strawberry, chocolate, vanilla and lemon, each decorated with light yellow frosting. He walks through the door again with the cake. It’s two tiered, layered in light blue frosting this time. In the same yellow frosting, Minghaos neat swirly scrawl reads ’Happy Birthday Jun and Soon!’.

Hansol smiles, and registers Seungkwan still holding him as Minghao eyes them.

”Looks good, man,” Hansol praises. Minghao smiles and breathes in relief. 

“And now we wait,” Minghao sighs.

”Now we wait,” Seungkwan mumbles back.



Seungkwan led Hansol to the couch, sitting him down. The restaurant was closed, but Minghao went back down to clean up the mess he made during preparations.

The couch is extremely comfortable. Hansol immediately sinks into it, reclining far enough to have to rest his chin on his own chest. Seungkwan huffs out a soft laugh before walking into the kitchen. He returns with two bottles of water, placing Hansols on the table, and holding onto his own.

He turns on a random ocean documentary as.. background noise? A distraction? Hansol isn’t sure, but he watches it all the same. Seungkwan starts playing with his hair, and Hansol fights the urge to stay awake and to not look at him.

He does though. Of course he does. Look at him, that is.

Seungkwan’s already looking at him. A smile gracing his lips when Hansol meets his eyes. The sun peaks through the windows behind Hansol, making the chocolate in his eyes melt. A trembling breath passes through Hansols lips.

Seungkwan watches his lips stutter. An agonizing second of silence passes. Hansol holds onto the feeling of Seungkwan still running his fingers though his hair. If he thinks too much something could happen, right? Something good but also evil?

Hansol doesn’t know, but he’s relieved and pissed when someone knocks on the door.

Figure it out..

Seungkwan takes a second to flinch, sigh, and untangle his fingers before standing and padding to the door. Hansol takes in a deep breath of air, calming his racing heart.

”Oh, hey,” Seungkwan says. Hansol cranes his neck to look over the couch. Mingyu walks in with pots of food, while Wonwoo carries beer.

”Minghao let us up,” Wonwoo says. He lets Seungkwan take one of the crates of beer, and follow him to the fridge.

Mingyu places the food on the stove and laughs sheepishly. “I got excited, and made a lot of food too early.” Seungkwan chuckles at him. 

Seungkwan walks to the hall, picking up the other pots with Wonwoo.

Mingyu makes eye contact with Hansol, and raises an eyebrow. Hansol twists his face, breaking the contact, and distracting himself with the documentary.

Blanket octopus, Hansol muses to himself. He feels the couch shift, the warmth of a body, knees against his thigh, and the familiar fingers in his hair.



Seokmin shows up at 7 pm, Soonyoung wrapped around him, and Jun in tow. When Minghao opens the door for them, they all shout ‘Happy Birthday’, loud and happy. It was far from a surprise party, they all knew it was happening, but that doesn’t weaken the impact.

Soonyoung is squeezing Seokmin, who laughs cheerily, and tells him to thank Minghao. Minghao smiles back, but looks back at Jun, who’s already smiling at him.

Hansol looks at Seungkwan, who smiles goofily at him, and turns back to them.

”Thank you, xiao Hao,” Jun mumbles. Minghao blushes, but waves him off to walk into the kitchen. Jun follows him with an amused smile.

The party, get together, is calm and perfect for the whole night. Hansol sticks by Seungkwan, mingling with everyone else. The night stays in this rhythm. Hansol nursing his beer, doing more observing than conversing. But it’s fine, he knows it’s fine. Seungkwan keeps comforting touches on him. An arm around his waist, a hand on his back, or dragging him around by his wrist or bicep. 

Every time he locks eyes with someone else, he swims in the encouragement and allowance he finds there. 

Jun and Minghao stick to their own corner for the most part, switching between Korean and Chinese. Jun tries everything that Minghao made, and while Minghao complains, he still drinks up all the praise and compliments he receives from him. 

They’re figuring it out.

Mingyu and Wonwoo stick to the kitchen. Mingyu keeps a steady eye on the food while Wonwoo sits on the counter next to him, watching. They talk, but Hansol thinks their comfortable silence speaks more than they ever could. They’ve got that rhythm. Mingyu talks more, but even he relishes in Wonwoos lack of conversation.

They invented figuring it out.

Seokmin is babying Soonyoung on the couch. He giggles a lot, lips covered in frosting, while Seokmin gazes awfully fondly at him. It gets to a point where Soonyoung crosses over to being drunk, and Seokmin apologizes, having to leave at 8 o’clock. 

They definitely figured it out.

Mingyu gets tired too 30 minutes later, Wonwoo rubbing comforting circles into his aching back. Minghao offers to walk them out, Jun trailing after him. 

Before Minghao closes the apartment door, he sends them a meaningful glance.

Oh, it’s weird. Being plunged into silence again.

”Um,” Seungkwan says. He’s stopped touching Hansol, now fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. He sticks close to him still. He stretches, shirt lifting, warm skin showing. “I’m gonna change real quick.”

And then he strolls out. Hansol watches him silently. Why’s he being to quiet? He clears his throat, heavy with lack of use. He watches Seungkwan bustle out his room, and into the bathroom. He’s wearing shorts and a loose tee now. 

When he steps back out, he smiles hesitantly, and waves Hansol over. Hansol walks over, moving a little goofily to make Seungkwan giggle. He stops in front of him and speaks.

”Hi.” It’s a mumble, probably barely audible, but it’s at least something. There’s something rough and scratchy about his voice, and he watches Seungkwan shudder.

”Hey,” He calls back quietly. He motions to his open room in a funny manner. “This is my room.”

”I can see that,” Hansol teases, pulling a surprised look.

His room is just as cool as the rest of the place. He’s got layered rugs covering the old dark wood, mismatched, of course. His bed frame is large, and wooden, carved impressively. There’s a wooden desk under the large window with am arm chair pushed into it.

”Why are you guys so cool?” Hansol mumbles. He traces his finger over the worn wood of the door, taking in the room.

”Just are, I guess,” Seungkwan sighs a fake dreamy sigh. He sways in his steps, walking into his room. 

Hansol follows, and closes the door. He doesn’t realize the implications of it until Seungkwan raises an eyebrow and colors. He just smiles back sheepishly.

He keeps his place against the door, watching Seungkwan. His fingers pick restlessly at the chipped paint until that gathers his attention.

”Stop,” he mumbles. He steps up to him, taking his bigger hands into his own, rubbing soothing circles into his knuckles. Hansol gazes at him, frozen in his spot. “What’s wrong, Hansollie?”

”I…” Seungkwan looks up at him again, and Hansols breath hitches. He swallows thickly, and watches Seungkwans eyes rake down to watch the movement. Nothing is wrong, and at the same time, so many things are wrong. “Kiss me?”

Seungkwan stills.

Then he’s pushing up onto his toes to press a lingering peck to Hansols lips. He pulls back, too quick for Hansol to react at all, but his lips tingle.

”Another?” He whispers.

Another, he complies easily. It’s the same.

A whine catches in his throat at the tease in Seungkwans smile.

”Hey,” he whispers. He pulls one his hands out of his grip, bringing it up to his cheek. He caresses the soft skin there, watching Seungkwans eyes flutter shut, before bringing their lips together again.

It’s a real kiss, Hansol realizes. Their lips fit and move against each other softly. Seungkwan lets go of his other hand to fist them into his shirt, bringing him closer. He hums when Hansols other hand snakes down to his waist, and rubs circles into it. 

Everything is right.

Somewhere along the way, Hansols tongue peaks out, licking Seungkwans bottom lip, groaning when he opens with a gasp. Their tongues slide together restlessly, panting into each other.

Seungkwan tastes like mint, and Hansol still tastes like beer, and it’s a weird mix, but it’s perfect. Even more perfect when Hansol sighs, and Seungkwan melts, sliding his arms around his neck.

His fingers start sliding into his hair to pull at it. It’s different from earlier, gentleness thrown out the window to make Hansol groan. Hansols own hands slip to his hips, pulling him closer there, thumbs sliding under his shirt to feel the soft warm skin. He moans into his mouth.

Seungkwan pulls away with one last nibble on his lip, and Hansol whines. He opens his eyes, watching Seungkwan pant and smile, his own breath coming out in short puffs as he mirrors him. Seungkwans lips are swollen and red, but his eyes are shining, gazing at him. So pretty.

Hansol leans down again, pulling at his lips slowly to feel the shiver run down his spine. Glides his lips down to his jaw, to hear his breath hitch. And sucks and nibbles at his pulse point to memorize the whimper he lets out.

He tugs at his hair to pull him back up.

”Are you tired?” Hansol whispers breathlessly. Seungkwan lets out a breathy laugh.


And when his arm wind around Hansols shoulders, breathing into another open mouthed kiss, Hansol realizes, squeezing bruising marks into his soft hips:

I fucking love him…


Chapter Text

A few months later…

Hansol rolled onto his back, and breathed in slowly. He was still drowsy, he could tell when me smacked his lips a few times, and by how weird it felt to breathe in through his nose.

He swipes his arm across the bed without looking, confirming himself of the emptiness. He grumbles low in his chest, then sits up with a pout. Running a hand through his hair, he slides his feet into his slippers.

He registers a cup of water next to his charging phone, and chugs it while he checks the time and notifications. He has none of course, but he still pouts at it. It’s 9 a.m. and no one texted him.

He grabs his tee off the ground, pulling it over his head, and smoothing down his boxers. His skin feels tender, and he blushes at the thought.

He stands and looks out the window, brushing the curtains aside. It’s mid summer, sun shining brightly, and there’s a bird hopping around on the windowsill. Hansol smiles, before opening the curtains fully, and walking out the room.

He hears a TV on, along with the familiar sound of a spoon in a mug, but he turns into the bathroom, willing himself to freshen up a bit. He steps out when he’s done, walking into the kitchen and smiling at the sight. Seungkwan’s leaning over the stove, one hand holding a spatula as he watches the eggs sizzle in the pan. 

There’s a small stack of five pancakes next to him, three of them dotted with chocolate chips. Seungkwan turns at the sound of him entering, and sends him a heart fluttering smile, one that Hansol tries to imitate. It makes Seungkwan snort though, so he assumes it must’ve been a little goofy. 

He steps up to him, standing behind him to wrap his arms around his working body. Seungkwan leans into him when he brushes his nose along the line of his neck, getting more space when Seungkwan arches his neck distractedly. He smells sweet, such a strong tangerine scent that makes Hansol smile against him. He switches places with his lips when he finds a pretty red bruise, and kisses it sweetly. Seungkwan shivers, and elbows him slightly, giggling out a soft ‘stop’

Hansol instead leans close to him on the counter, keeping one hand on the small of his back. He lets his fingers slip under his shirt, smoothing over the skin there, but all his focus is on Seungkwan making them breakfast.

”Good morning,” he breathes out.

“Mornin’,” Hansol mumbles back. He’s smiling softly at the side of Seungkwans face. Seungkwans got that focused pout on in full force, skin looking squishy, and soft, and tired. His eyes are a little puffy, and Hansol wants to pinch him.

His ears and neck start turning red, a different pout forming. “Stop staring at me,” he grumbles. Hansol just snorts, and leans over, pressing a few kisses into the side of his face.

Hansol still lives with Mingyu and Wonwoo, but he can’t help but stay over here a few nights out of the week. He does it so often that sometimes they forget he lives there in the first place, walking out of their room and seeing him on the couch still makes them flinch. Mingyu halfheartedly complains and teases him about his presence. Wonwoo stays pretty much the same, if not a little bit more clingy.

He also sees a lot of Jun. Minghao has him over a lot too. Jun and Hansol fight over for room on the couch while the other two converse over other things, ignoring their bickering. It only ever stops when Minghao leaves the room, Jun perking up like a dog and following him around. 

They eat their breakfast at the counter, turned to each other with their legs entangled. Hansol can’t help but stare when it comes to the other boy. He fluffs out his bangs while he eats, then scrolling through his phone. When syrup runs down his lip, he licks at it, then drags his teeth across his lip to collect it. 

When they finish eating, Hansol stops Seungkwan from collecting the plates with a hand. He fixes him with a confused look, eyes roving over his face. Hansol starts smiling, Seungkwan mirroring him, still apprehensive. 

He brings a hand up to his cheek, brushing across his skin, and places his other one on his thigh. Seungkwan still eyes him, though it’s softer, a little bit more understanding there.

He leans in, kissing him slowly to taste the sickly sweet syrup there. He groans, and Seungkwan braces himself with hands on his bicep. He squeezes them when Hansol nips at his lip. 

“Hansollie,” he whimpers when they part slightly. Hansol kneads the muscles in his thigh, eyeing the redness of his lips.

”Aish,” someone hisses when Hansol leans in again. Hansol smiles sheepishly, removing his hands. Seungkwan is beat red, distracting himself with finally putting the plates in the sink. “It’s too early for this.”

Minghao sighs, padding over to the couch. Jun strolls out of his bedroom, hair tousled, fixing them with a sophisticated look.

”Ah, let them have their fun, Hao Hao,” He says wistfully. Minghao grumbles, reclining and changing the channel. “Young love… such a precious and fragile thing.”

”Shut up, hyung,” Hansol sighs. Seungkwan snorts, coming up behind Hansol to play with his ears. Hansol leans into the touch.

Jun sputters. “I was literally on your side.” He sits next to Minghao, wrapping around him like a koala, complaining in his ear. Minghao rolls his eyes, but wraps his arms around Juns knees.

Seungkwan hums. “Young love, eh?” He whispers, close to his ear. Hansol smiles, twisting around to pull him closer by the waist. Seungkwan is biting down a smile, watching his hands trail up Hansol arms. When his fingers tangle themselves into Hansols hair, he looks him in the eye, and lets himself smile.

”Yeah,” Hansol mumbles, rubbing circles into his waist. “I love you, Kwannie.”

Seungkwans nose scrunches, a goofy smile taking place on his face. “Yeah?” He says. Hansol nods. “I love you too.”

Hansol laughs. “Yeah?” Seungkwan giggles, nodding as he leans in. Their lips meet, slow, sweet, sensual. 

Minghao grunts loudly, raising the volume of the TV. They part with a laugh, meeting the withering glare sent their way. Jun is rubbing calming circles into him, simultaneously holding him down.

Hansol can live with this.