Actions

Work Header

what’s up danger

Chapter Text

[THE MARAUDERS(((REAL!!!)))]

11:00AM

 

prongs I’M TELLING YOU WE WERE ROBBED

prongs: A BEAUTIFUL, SHY, LOYAL CHARACTER WHO WAS SO HONESTLY IN LOVE WITH HIS ONLY FRIEND THAT ACCEPTED ALL OF HIS FLAWS???!!!!

prongs: R-O-B-B-E-D

 

wormtail: and i’m telling you it’s better this way bc the show was very intimidating and yes, it’s sad it was closed but heyyyyy we got some good seasons for you to rewatch on a blue day

 

prongs: AND WE COULD HAVE HAD MORE IF WE WEREN’T ROBBED

 

padfoot: 145 new messages in the last 15 minutes wtf were you talking about

 

prongs: gm sunshine <3333333

 

padfoot: omg hi loml <333 how did u sleep

 

prongs: i would have slept better if it weren’t for pete’s SNORING

 

wormtail: I DO NOT SNORE YOU MOTHERFLOWER

wormtail: wait WHAT THE DUCK

wormtail: F U C K

 

padfoot: LMAO WHO’S CHANGED HIS AUTOCORRECT

 

moony: that would be meeee

 

prongs REEEEMUSSSSSS

 

wormtail: hi sexy

wormtail: wtf

wormtail: hi sexy

wormtail: WTFFFFF

 

padfoot: ohmygod you didn’t-

 

moony: i certainly did. do not doubt my intelligence pads

 

prongs: how bored were you?

 

moony: too bored to take a nap, too tired to watch a movie and too thrilled to see peter’s forgotten phone

 

padfoot: wait you stayed at our place????

 

moony: no, i came over at around 7:30AM because i was up all night. james greeted me with a cup of coffee and then i had to rush to see someone

 

wormtail: at 8am…?

 

moony: idk what to say i am a very busy man

moony: so…

moony: dirk gently’s holistic detective agency?

 

prongs: OH YEAH I FORGOT ABOUT MY RANTING

prongs: we were so robbed i hate netflix like man you had only one job and you fucked up. we lost an opportunity to have one of the best adhd character representations and THEY FUCKED IT UP

 

padfoot: wait a goddamn minute

padfoot: this tv show was canceled like ages ago why did you suddenly remember it?

 

prongs: i was looking out of our incredible full-length size window and i saw a corgi

prongs: you know where there was also a corgi?????

 

moony: DGHDA

 

wormtail: DGHDA

 

padfoot: DGHDA

 

prongs: i like it when my men know my taste in tv-series

prongs BUT YEAH

prongs: sirius was asleep, remus was busy, peter was at work so the lovely man, that being me, had to rant somewhere and i decided to do it here to receive some great supportive feedback but SOMEONE thought that DGHDA WAS NOT WORTH REVIVING

 

moony: oh no peter

moony: you had only one job

 

wormtail: you do know that i in fact have only one job🤔

 

padfoot: you’ll be hearing from your supervisor very soon

padfoot: because YOUR ASS IS FIRED

 

wormtail: at least i make 5 digits

 

padfoot: EXCUSE YOU

padfoot: IT’S HARD BEING AN ARCHITECT WHEN EVERY SINGLE BUILDING IS GETTING DESTROYED EVERYDAY BY EITHER VILLAINS OR SUPERHEROES!!!!!!!!!🤬🤬🤬🤬

 

moony: i thought that it would be quite the opposite

moony: that you would get more clients BECAUSE they do that

 

padfoot: everyone is switching to online platforms. they are saying, “it’s an improvident investment to buy a building for a company. any day SOME vigilante like SPIDER-MAN may end up ruining it”. quote by one and only love of remus’s life

 

moony: first of all, fuck off. because i am not fangirling as much as you all do about spider-man doesn’t mean that i hate the guy AND IT CERTAINLY DOESN’T MEAN THAT I THINK HE IS A MENACE

moony: and second of all, my loml is salted caramel ice-cream

 

padfoot: didn’t know you were a rich white girl

 

moony: it’s salted caramel, idiot. not vanilla or pistachio

moony: it’s the flavor of the gays

 

padfoot: i’ll take my words back. based

 

moony: wow a rare case. did you get a cold or smth?

 

padfoot: i’m gonna cut your throat open

 

moony: sorry, not into that!

 

wormtail: it’s def too early for this

 

prongs: STOOOOPPPPPPP ITTTTTT YOU GUYS. YOU ARE DISGUSTING!

prongs: get yourself together we need to do our morning ritual

 

moony: talking about JJJ is YOUR morning ritual, not mine

 

padfoot: too late

 

prongs: j juicy jameson wakes up and chooses violence every day

 

wormtail: against himself, apparently. have you seen his face? the man looks like he has a cage with spiders to kill to let out his insufferable anger

 

padfoot: that’s a very thought-provoking controversy. where did you get it?

 

wormtail: twitter

 

prongs: we love twitter, but we hate the toxic vibezzzz🤩🤩🤩🤩

 

moony: how many cups of coffee did you drink today james

 

prongs: yes

 

wormtail: that is not how it works

 

prongs: i’m ‘kay. besides, you are all busy today so i'm gonna hit the gym

 

moony: … for the entire day?

 

prongs: gotta get the juices pumpin’ baby!✨✨✨✨

 

moony: how do i erase this message from my traumatized memory box

 

padfoot: u hit delete dipshit

 

moony: oh sorry didn’t know that it worked that way i thought i had to restart my whole system and reset my password

 

padfoot: make sure your new password is siriusblackisthehottestguy

padfoot: so i can be in your head 24/7🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵

 

moony: too long

moony: i’ll change it to siriusisajerk

 

padfoot: i hate you

 

 

 

[Sirius & Remus]

11:15AM

 

shrek: yooo moony

shrek: we’re still up for tonight, right?

 

donkey: gosh we need to change our nicknames

 

shrek: why it’s hilarious

 

donkey: FOR YOU

donkey: yeah. 6PM, your place – although it’s not yours and you share an apartment with two other sweaty dudes – fake chinese food & scooby-doo marathon

 

shrek: good! bc i was worried if you would cancel it last minute

 

donkey: who do you think i am?

 

shrek: a donkey

 

donkey: ruDE

donkey: oh wait nvm i am slow

 

shrek: maybe next time you actually go to sleep for once?

shrek: if you fall asleep while we are watching scooby-do imma make you dress up like fred for an entire week

 

donkey: why would you do me so dirty

 

shrek: bc ily

 

donkey: ilyt doofus

 

shrek: i realized that back in middle school u used to dress up like shaggy

 

donkey: OH, GET LOST SIRIUS

 

shrek: AHUHJRFEJKSDFJKSKLSKLDSDLKSKL LMAAAAAAAOOOOO

shrek: BUT YOU DID

 

donkey: FUCK

donkey: OFF

 

 

[Remus & Tony Stark]

4:03PM

 

Tony Stank: Hey Remus.

Tony Stank: Wait, hold up. When did you change MY nickname?

 

Tony Stank changed their nickname to GBPP Tony

 

remus: what does it stand for?

 

GBPP Tony: Genius, Billionaire, Playboy, Philanthropist

 

remus: i’ll screenshot and send it to pepper

 

GBPP Tony changed their nickname to Tony Stark(the best)

 

Tony Stark(the best): You did not see that.

 

remus: so what’s up?

 

Tony Stark(the best): I need you in South Korea. RN.

 

remus: sorry to tell you but i can’t fly or teleport

 

Tony Stark(the best): No worries about that, Dr. Douchebag is gonna pick you up

 

remus: huh?

 

4:10PM

remus: I FORGOT HE COULD DO THAT

 

Tony Stark(the best): You are facing an escaped prisoner with daddy issues, be ready for whatever is coming.

 

remus: I HAVE TO FIGHT THIS GIANT ALONE????

 

Tony Stark(the best): No, Ant-Man’s got your back.

 

remus: i’m screwed.

 

Tony Stark(the best): Pretty much yeah. But Scotty’s a good pal. He’ll try his best.

 

remus: how long do you think it will take me to fight him?

 

Tony Stark(the best): About half an hour.

Tony Stark(the best): But I need you after that.

 

remus: i have plans, you know

remus: personal life

 

Tony Stark(the best): It can wait. It’s very important.

Tony Stark(the best): I’m sorry.

 

remus: uhhhhh

 

Tony Stark(the best): I’ll treat you with pineapple pizza.

Tony Stark(the best): Although it’s disgusting.

 

remus: okay

remus: i’m just sad that i have to cancel my plans

remus: again

 

Tony Stark(the best): Personal life and The Avengers tend to not work out a lot.

 

remus: i mean i chose this so it’s fine

remus: DUDE I’M HAVING A CONVERSATION STOP THROWING STUFF AT ME

 

Tony Stark(the best): Are you texting while fighting?

 

remus: yes

remus: i’m using karen’s auto voice translator. a very good option when there’s a guy who is trying to kill you

 

Tony Stark(the best): Then I’ll talk to you later in person

Tony Stark(the best): Good luck kid.

 

[Sirius & Remus]

4:45PM

 

donkey: i’m so sorry

 

shrek: for what

 

donkey: there’s been an emergency at Stark Industries and they need me

 

shrek: no

shrek: you promised me

 

donkey: i know and i’m so fucking sorry about that

 

shrek: can’t they deal with it without you?

 

donkey: i’m afraid no

 

shrek: remus

 

donkey: i’m sorry

 

shrek: it’s fine

 

donkey: no, it’s not

 

shrek: well of course it’s not but you and i can’t do anything about it

shrek: do your thing. save everyone. we’ll see each other later

shrek: someday

 

donkey: i’m sorry sirius

 

shrek: stop it and go already

 

 

[Sirius & James]

4:50PM

 

killer queen: am sad

killer queen: am so fucking sad

 

lover boy: oh no :((((((( what’s happened

 

killer queen: moony canceled on me

killer queen: again

killer queen: there’s been an emergency at SI

 

lover boy: can’t they deal with it w/o him? :(

 

killer queen: that’s literally what i told him

 

lover boy: so the answer is no

lover boy: gosh i am sorry honey you were SO looking forward to this night

 

killer queen: i haven’t seen him in weeks and i really miss my best friend

killer queen: and you got to see him in the morning. YOU COULD HAVE WOKEN ME UP FFS

killer queen: … but I would probably hit you in the face

killer queen: ………………

killer queen: it’s THAT sad, isn’t it?

 

lover boy: i’m not telling him, no worries

 

killer queen: let’s tell him to quit his job

 

lover boy: n o

 

killer queen: BUT WHY

 

lover boy: you know that yourself pads

lover boy: he got a job at one of the largest tech conglomerates in the world and he works there as an assistant for one of stark’s CEOs

lover boy: he is the youngest protégé in the history of stark industries

lover boy: he had worked so hard for it, he deserved to have it

lover boy: this is his dream job honeybun

lover boy: and we have to accept it even though we miss him

 

killer queen: why r u so freaking perfect

 

lover boy: that's because i'm a good old-fashioned lover boy

lover boy: let’s just make sure that in the nearest future we are gonna occupy him with oNLY uS

 

killer queen: GOOD IDEA

killer queen: IMMA ANNOY THE SHIT OUT OF HIM

 

lover boy: lmao u will

 

***

REMUS LUPIN’S NOTES

 

July 15, 2024 at 9:23PM

 

I am tired. Utterly exhausted. My back hurts, my head hurts, my ass hurts, my arms hurt so much I can’t even move some of my fingers. I didn’t think that this dude would manage to throw an enormous car at me for calling him ‘lame’. Hit me too hard for fuck’s sake.

 I wish I could talk to somebody and get a hug but nooooooo. Remus, you had to become a superhero and hide your identity to protect your friends and family. Oh wait, MJ and Ned know. They figured it out by accident and now they are risking their lives for you. Yeah, no, I’m not going to talk to them. I haven’t in a while, and I won’t.

This sounds absurd, I am talking to myself in notes while eating pineapple pizza. Buuuut I might as well continue this journey. I am bored and I do need to let it all out.

         I am an awful friend. I let Sirius down again. I let myself down again. I really wanted to see him tonight but I told him that there was ‘an emergency at SI’. Why do I keep getting away with it? I’ve been lying to him, James & Peter for the past… what… 3 years? At least it’s 3 for me. I blipped. Gosh, I’m just waiting for the moment when they all get tired of me and stop talking to me. It would be safer for them.

         It would be lonely, though.

         UUUUGHHHHH REMUS JOHN LUPIN STOP THINKING ABOUT IT.

         Let’s change the subject. Hmmmmm, OH YEAH! Tony talked to me about an initiative that he’s been working on since the battle with Thanos. It’s like secret Avengers. He invited me to join it, said something like: “You could be a great leader for them.” Well, that’s a lie. No good with leadership. But I said yes. Maybe if I get more tasks, I will manage to bury myself in work and college and get separated from the Marauders. okay, this thought creeps me out. gosh gosh gosh gosh gosh gosh gosh gosh gosh gosh gosh

         I’m sorry guys.

***

 

[Remus & Tony Stark]

10:16PM

 

Tony Stark(the best): Hey kid.

Tony Stark(the best): Are you ready?

 

remus: after eating good pizza yes siiiiir i am

remus: thank you btw it was so delicious

 

Tony Stark(the best): Tell that to Happy. He recommended it.

 

remus: will do!!!

 

Tony Stark(the best): Okay. Before I do this, please be aware that they are all around your age (some of them are older due to the blip) and are very nice people. If you don’t feel comfortable, don’t push it and just talk to me, alrighty?

 

remus: yeah. thanks, tony

 

Tony Stark(the best): No problem.

 

[THE LEGION: REPUTATION ERA]

10:18PM

 

the maj: I’M TELLING YOU REPUTATION IS THE BEST ALBUM

 

aves: no IT’S FOLKLORE

 

frostbite: i’m with aves on this one

 

dora: ARE WE GONNA FIGHT?????

 

hyle: *casually listens to lover all by himself*

 

the maj: MIGHT AS WELL DO THAT

 

aves: IM GONNA TAKE IT THERE IF YOU WANT TO SWIFTIE

 

the maj: THIS IS LITERALLY A COMPLIMENT IDIOOOOOOT

 

morph: why are you all so mad about some music artist?

 

white fox: S O M E ???

 

the maj: M U S I C ????????

 

aves: A R T I S T ?????????????????????

 

dora: THAT’S IT

dora: let’s all fight morph

dora: hyle u with us, right?

 

hyle: definitely

hyle: this person has no taste

 

morph: wha-

 

dora: FIGHT🗣🗣🗣

 

the maj: FIGHT!!!!!!!

 

aves: FIGHTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!

 

white fox: FIIIIIGGGHHHTTTTTTT

 

frostbite: fiiiiGGGHTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!

 

morph: GUYS PLEASE

 

Tony Stark: What on Earth is happening?

 

aves: nothing

 

hyle: definitely nothing, sir

 

Tony Stark: You don’t need me babysitting you 24/7, do you?

Tony Stark: Or… I could ask Doctor Strange to do that.

Tony Stark: Do you want Doctor Strange to babysit you?

Tony Stark: You will probably end up in a canyon or on a very freezing mountain.

 

frostbite: i mean i’m fine with freezing mountain

frostbite: i’m frostbite lmao

 

the maj: SHUT UP. YOU DON’T WANT THIS

the maj: SORRY MR. STARK

 

Tony Stark: Ahem…

 

aves: sorry mr stark

 

white fox: sorry mr stark

 

morph: sorry mr. stark

 

hyle: sorry mr stark

 

dora: sorry mr stark

 

frostbite: sorry mr stark

 

Tony Stark: Okay, I forgive all of you.

Tony Stark: I have some news.

Tony Stark: We have a newcomer.

Tony Stark: And before I add him to the group chat, I want you ALL to promise me that you won’t dump any questions on him.

Tony Stark: He is very nervous about joining this team.

Tony Stark: And please be nice to him.

 

aves: pinky promise u mr stark!!!

 

frostbite: same same

 

morph: i promise

 

hyle: I PROMISE!!!!!

 

the maj: i promise we won’t kill him with pressure

 

dora: promise

 

white fox: same. what they just said

 

Tony Stark: Okay.

Tony Stark: Well, here goes nothing.

 

Tony Stark added spider-man to the group chat

 

spider-man: hey everyone

 

Tony Stark: Meet Spider-Man.

 

hyle: HOLY SHIIIIIT

Chapter Text

 

[THE LEGION: REPUTATION ERA]

 

10:20PM

 

spider-man: hey everyone

 

Tony Stark: Meet Spider-Man.

 

hyle: HOLY SHIIIIIT

 

white fox: oh wow hi spidey !!!

 

spider-man: Hewlo White Fox! You’ve got a cool name

 

white fox: AWWWWWWWEEEE i already love him. can i adopt him???????💖💖💖

 

the maj: are you that kid that fought along with Dr. Strange?

the maj: i’ve heard some funny stories from him

 

spider-man: 1. Rude. I’m literally over 18

spider-man: 2. Yup, ‘t was me

spider-man: 3. Has he also mentioned to you about how I saved his ass?

 

the maj: LMAO

the maj: will take a note of that✍️✍️✍️

the maj: to roast him

 

spider-man: GOOD LOL

 

morph: WAIT WE HAVE AN AVENGER ON OUR TEAM??? IS THIS FOR REAL????

 

hyle: i need some fresHHH AIIIIRRRRR

 

morph: hyle omg breathe

 

hyle: i’m tryinGGGG💨💨💨

 

aves: everyone SHUT UP

aves: alexa play my ordinary life i need to make my first impression LOOK GOOD

aves: ahem…🗣

aves: HI SPIDER-MAN!!!!! IT’S AN HONOR TO BE WORKING WITH YOU!!! IM AVES!!!!!!🥺🥺🥺🥺

 

spider-man: WAIT

spider-man: AVES?!

spider-man: WHAT’S UP MAN?

spider-man: HAVEN’T SEEN YOU SINCE THE BATTLE

 

aves: YOU REMEMBER ME???🥺🥺🥺🥺

 

spider-man: OFC. you had that cool black suit and YOUR POWERS DUUUUDE. how have i not seen you in the city? didn’t you tell me that you are based in NYC too?

 

aves: i sort of got a little side-tracked with my irl after that day, so no superhero stuff

aves: until now !!!!!!!!

 

spider-man: Oh.

spider-man: But it’s very nice to see you – well, not physically but you get it.

 

aves: same!!!

 

frostbite: what am i looking at rn

frostbite: also, hi spidey-boy

 

spider-man: I think I should just… explain.

spider-man: When there was that battle with Thanos back few months ago I met some new people, that included Aves

spider-man: He was in danger, and I saved him and we had a lovely chat

spider-man: And we promised each other that we would meet again but we never did

 

aves: until now :)))

 

dora: seems like fate is not a bitch after all

 

spider-man: oh HI D!

 

dora: hi idiot when r u gonna give me my spear back

 

spider-man: it’s not with me it’s with @Tony Stark

 

Tony Stark: Don’t include me in your lies.

 

spider-man: EXCUSE YOU

spider-man: *tonystarkpretendstoknowhowtoholdaspear.mp4*

 

dora: LMAAAAAOOOOOOOOO WHAT IS THIS😭😭😭😭😭

 

aves: a fever dream in action. IMAX premiere🎬🎬🎬🎬

 

white fox: I LOVE IT. I LOVE IT SM😭😭😭😭

 

hyle: DUDE YOU ARE AMAZING LMAAAAAOOOOOO&&79&7&%%

 

Tony Stark: You are dead.

 

morph: 😮

 

hyle: spider-man!

hyle: or spider?

hyle: or spidey…?

hyle: is it okay if i call you spidey???

 

spider-man: it’s alright man haha, spidey is cool!

spider-man: please don’t think that I am an authority or something. ‘m just a guy with superpowers

 

hyle: I AM SO SORRY IF IT MADE YOU FEEL THIS WAY

hyle: IM JUST NERVOUS

hyle: not every day you get to be in the same group chat as the legend himself

 

Tony Stark: Well, thank you! :)

 

spider-man: He wasn’t talking about you old man

 

Tony Stark: You are not invited to Happy’s birthday.

 

spider-man: boooooooooo

spider-man: So, what is it Hyle?

 

hyle: i was wondering why you decided to join us

 

spider-man: Oh

spider-man: Thought it would be cool to be in a team where I am actually not the youngest lol

spider-man: Because the Avengers are all old

 

Tony Stark: I am literally right here.

 

spider-man: I know :D

 

white fox: and how old are you exactly?

 

spider-man: not telling you

 

Tony Stark: 46

 

spider-man: THAT’S A LIE

spider-man: It’s nice to be here!

 

aves: I have a question!

 

Tony Stark: Let’s save all questions for later, kids.

Tony Stark: It’s time to wrap with up. Tomorrow, I’ll notify you with new information.

Tony Stark: So… You can say some nice stuff and I’ll close the chat.

 

spider-man: You can do that????

spider-man: nvm I forgot this is your app

 

the maj: i’ll go first!!!

the maj: it was nice chatting to all of you(especially aves, slide into my dms we haven’t finished talking about taylor swift)

the maj: aaaand it’s nice to meet you spidey!

 

dora: you all are SOOO incredible i can’t wait to meet y’all

 

hyle: hYPE HYPE HYPE THE MEET UP!!!!!

hyle: im eXCITEDDDDDDD!!!!!

hyle: goodnight VERY NICE PEOPLE

 

morph: I just hope you won’t kill me bc i don’t listen to taylor swift

 

aves: no worries we will corrupt your mind with her and you will become obsessed just wait

 

morph: … definitely not sus🤨

 

white fox: be scared boy(or girl or whatever fits you!) and yeah nice talking to you all!

 

frostbite: let’s just make sure dr strong doesn’t babysit us

 

spider-man: DR STRONG LMAO😭

 

Tony Stark: He is pussy at fighting.

 

spider-man: 🤥

 

the maj: lie

 

aves: SO LOOONG AND GOODNIIIIGGGGHT

 

spider-man: ladies and gentlemen and non-binary people we’ve found an emo

 

aves: how did you know-

 

spider-man: my friend is obsessed with MCR. he denies his emo phase but wears leather jackets

 

morph: oh yeah i have a friend like this too

 

aves: sounds like me LMAO. i would love to meet him

 

spider-man: NO, HE IS AN IDIOT

 

dora: and yet you are friends with him because…?

 

spider-man: he is an annoying ass, but we share one braincell so I can’t get rid of him

 

white fox: NICE

white fox: are you an emo boy too spider?

 

spider-man: N O

 

frostbite: that’s what an emo boy would say🤔🤔🤔🤔

 

the maj: tHE SLANDER

 

spider-man: I’m rethinking my appliance to this team

 

white fox: oh no the boy doesn’t want to be in our emo band🥺🥺🥺🥺

 

aves: EMO BAND😭😭😭😭

 

dora: i bet we all listen to the queen HALSEY

 

hyle: YUP YUP YUP YUP❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️

 

Tony Stark: Okay, that’s enough.

Tony Stark: Nice seeing you getting along.

Tony Stark: And you will chat later.

 

Tony Stark closed the group chat until further notice.

 

 

[Remus & Tony Stark]

11:00PM

 

Tony Stark(the best): So how are you feeling?

 

remus: weird but in a good way

remus: some of them remind me of my friends and it’s making me feel more comfortable

remus: i think i am happy to be joining this whole idea

 

Tony Stark(the best): Cool.

Tony Stark(the best): That’s why I thought it would be great if you did that. You’ve worked with Dora and Aves(the latter is new information for me, but it’s still cool) and I thought that it was time for you to make new friends.

Tony Stark(the best): You’ve been feeling lonely recently.

 

remus: noooo, i’m good

 

Tony Stark(the best): You can’t lie to me. I saw you sobbing because you had to cancel your plans.

 

remus: erase that

 

Tony Stark(the best): Haha, NO.

Tony Stark(the best): Having new friends within the superhero thing is going to be great for you.

Tony Stark(the best): You will be able to hang out with them while also not feeling completely left out with socializing and friends.

Tony Stark(the best): Not that I know how it feels, I just think I know you enough to make this deduction.

 

remus: thank you

remus: i appreciative that

remus: it’s just… i am scared to lose my friends

 

Tony Stark(the best): You mean MJ and Ned?

 

remus: them too

remus: i mean the marauders

remus: i’ve told you about them

 

Tony Stark(the best): Yeah, the weirdest name for a group of people.

 

remus: okay avenger

 

Tony Stark(the best): Shut up. I didn’t come up with that.

Tony Stark(the best): Trust me, when you get used to the Legion, you will be able to sort everything out. It’s like a chain reaction. You start feeling comfortable and included there, you will start feeling the same with your real-life friends who don’t know your identity(except for MJ and Ned).

 

remus: got it!

 

Tony Stark(the best): Goodnight, Remus.

 

remus: goodnight!!!

 

11:08PM

 

remus: i’m still invited to happy’s bday right?

 

Tony Stark(the best): Ofc.

 

remus: … and are you going to give the spear back to dora?

 

Tony Stark(the best): No.

Tony Stark(the best): I love it.

Tony Stark(the best): It’s spiky.

 

remus: are you sirius

remus: *serious i hate this

 

Tony Stark(the best): Definitely.

Tony Stark(the best): Gn.

 

[The Maj & Aves]

11:30PM

 

aves: SAY YOU’LL REMEMBER ME

 

the maj: STANDING IN A NICE DRESS STARING AT THE SUNSET BABE

 

aves: omgggg didn’t know i was your babe🥺


the maj:
LMAO YOU WISH

the maj: please continue

 

aves: RED LIPS AND ROSY CHEEEECKS

 

the maj: SAY YOU’LL SE ME AGAIN EVEN IF IT’S JUST IN YOUR

 

aves: WIIIIILDEEESSST DREEEAMS AH-HAAAAA

 

the maj: WIIIIILDEEEEST DREEEEAMS AH-HAAAAAAAAAAA

 

aves: gosh it’s so good to find a swiftie!!!🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

 

the maj: same!!! i don’t have friends who listen to her🥺🥺🥺🥺

 

aves: OOOH sad :(((

aves: but i have! my bff loves her!!! we carpool karaoke every time he drives me somewhere

 

the maj: luckyyyyyyy

 

aves: don’t worry i’ll carpool karaoke with you too🥺🥺🥺🥺

 

the maj: omg please hand in marriage💍

 

aves: would love to if i wasn’t more interested in men sorry

 

the maj: OOOOHHHH so you are a guy?

 

aves: yup!!! and you are a girl i s’pose?

 

the maj: yeeeesssss

the maj: a question?

 

aves: vas-y !

 

the maj: are you gay?

 

aves: well

 

the maj: you are not obliged to answer aves!

 

aves: no!!! it’s fine honey

aves: i’d say i am questioning

aves: i’ve dated both men and women and as far as my experience has let me i feel more comfortable with men

aves: if you know what i mean

 

the maj: definitely!

 

aves: it’s just… the feelings are much stronger and… it feels more right

aves: that sounded disrespectful of me i am sorry

aves: i just mean that i am not attracted enough to women or maybe i am not attracted at all to them but girls are still incredible!!!

aves: it’s just hard but i don’t want to put a label right now

aves: i know it’s weird

aves: i feel weird now that i’ve said that

aves: sorry

 

the maj: aves it’s okay to feel this way. loving men doesn’t make you any different and i support you <3

the maj: you can count on me if you have a mental breakdown about it next time

 

aves: awwww thank you!

aves: so… why the maj?

 

the maj: it’s not my superhero name. i don’t even have one. just shortened version of the magician since i am a one

 

aves: you know dr strange?

 

the maj: yeah! he taught me magic!!!

 

aves: cOOL

aves: we’ll come up with a superhero name for you don’t worry

 

the maj: this would be awesome <3

 

aves: listen i actually have an idea that i want to propose

 

the maj: go ahead

 

aves: what if we created a chat for all of us but just without mr stark so he doesn’t turn off the discussion and we can yell and have fun as much as we want that?

 

the maj: THIS IS A GOOD IDEA

the maj: how will we name it?

 

aves: i have something on mind

 

[NOT NAMED]

user aves created a group chat

aves added the maj, hyle, spider-man, white fox, morph, dora, and frostbite to the group chat

aves changed the group chat name to EMO BAND

 

11:45PM

 

aves: it’s just so mr stark doesn’t spy on us and close the chat whenever we want to talk to each other

 

the maj: EMO BAND😭😭😭😭

 

frostbite: GENIUS

 

aves: just call me aves ;)

 

hyle: HYPE HYPE HYPE HYPE❗️❗️❗️❗️

 

morph: i’m surprised i was added😐

 

dora: me too

 

morph: HEY🤨

 

dora: you said it not me lol

 

white fox: omg finally no old men in the gc

 

the maj: wait isn’t spidey like 46

 

spider-man: HE WAS JOKING

spider-man: I’M 20😭😭😭😭

 

white fox: BUSTED AND CAUGHT ON CAMERA

 

spider-man: LMAO NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

spider-man: At least don’t sell this info to JJJ

 

white fox: thanks for giving me an idea✍️✍️✍️✍️

 

spider-man: WHITE FOX WHY😭

 

the maj: if it makes you feel better i’m 20 too!

 

hyle: idk ‘bout you but i feel like 20 too!(same)

 

aves: OMG GOOD ONE

 

morph: i’m 25

 

dora: same here ^^^

 

frostbite: i’d like to join hyle’s pun and say that i’m 20 too!

 

white fox: i am 25

 

aves: i am turning 26 very soon

 

frostbite: that makes you the oldest

 

aves: SO IM IN CHARGE?😎😎😎😎

 

frostbite: n o bc u act like a child

 

aves: :(((((

 

the maj: the slander shall be stopped because i’m very tired and would like to go to bed

the maj: goodnight everyone!!!

 

aves: GOODNIGHT BESTIE💞💞💞💞💞

 

hyle: gnnnnn!!!!!

 

morph: gn guys

 

dora: good noighttttt

 

frostbite: nightie-nightie!

 

white fox: GN!!!

 

spider-man: goodnight emo band

 

aves: SPIDEY NO-

 

spider-man: YOU CAME UP WITH IT NOT ME BYE

Chapter Text

[Sirius & Remus]

9:28 AM

 

donkey: hey

 

shrek: hey man what’s up

 

donkey: everything’s fine

donkey: i wanted to say sorry for ditching you yesterday.

 

shrek: you are still worried about that even after i said it’s fine?

 

donkey: yeah. it was an emergency and they needed me there and i am very sorry. i know i promised us to meet like a week ago and we had it all arranged and then i screwed up.

 

shrek: listen

shrek: first of all, don’t use proper punctuation at me. it makes you sound very official and thoughtful

shrek: second of all, it’s fine. really. you are the smartest person on the planet (well, maybe after tony stark) and of course they needed your help because you always sort things out. you are remus lupin after all

 

donkey: haha i’m touched

donkey: and… thank you for understanding

 

shrek: u r welcome

shrek: i just miss you. with the whole blip going on and losing you and james for 5 years it’s not like things were the same

shrek: and then you and james came back and we had to learn how to live in this new world

shrek: and then you got that job after being an intern for a solid while and i can’t just be in your life as before, though i’m proud of you

shrek: and my job is mixing up my schedule

shrek: it sucks

shrek: it sucks so much because i can’t talk to you properly. can’t have a movie night ‘n’ stuff. we haven’t gathered as the whole team in months(screw you AND your college AND james AND his college AND peter AND his boring job) and it just SUCKS

 

donkey: wow didn’t know you were so corny🙄

 

shrek: and this is what u say after me pouring my heart to u. i demand respect

 

donkey: in your dreams lmao

 

9:45AM

donkey: i miss you too

 

shrek: huh? what was that again?

 

donkey: it’s a messenger. lookup and reread it stupid🤨

 

shrek: the message is blank

 

donkey: i miss you.

donkey: and the others

donkey: it hasn’t been the same, i, for once in my life, agree with you

 

shrek: now who is corny

 

donkey: will you stop ruining the moment😐

 

shrek: yeah

shrek: i just wish it would have stayed the same. us all together, the marauders gang, doing stupid pranks and getting our asses kicked by the teachers

 

donkey: but it will never be the same. the world has gradually changed. we have changed

 

shrek: i hate being a grown-up

 

donkey: same

donkey: you free right now?

 

shrek: yeah why

 

donkey: how about getting breakfast and then talking?

 

shrek: so when we arrange stuff u can’t make it and when it’s all sudden u r free

 

donkey: yeah i know

donkey: so?

 

shrek: meet me in 15 at delmar’s

 

donkey: gosh i missed those sandwiches

 

shrek: i know

 

[THE MARAUDERS(((REAL!!!)))]

10:14AM

 

padfoot: caught on camera

prongs: OMG MY TWO CELEBRITY CRUSHES FINALLY MET

prongs: going on my secret insta fan acc brb🏃🏃🏃🏃💨💨💨💨

 

moony: lmao

 

wormtail: what are you doing rn?

 

padfoot: just embracing the true nature of NYC

 

moony: read: we passed through a huge trash bin with rats all over it

 

wormtail: noice

wormtail: you two are having fun without us what a betrayal😶

 

padfoot: oh so let’s ignore how prongsie chatted with moons yesterday and LITERALLY DID THE SAME

 

prongs: are you still mad about it

 

padfoot: no tbh if it bothers you i’ll stop !!!

 

prongs: nO I DIDN’T MEAN TO SOUND PUSHY😭😭😭😭😭😭

prongs: i hate texting i don’t know how to express the huge flow of emotions in letters

 

padfoot: and that’s why we should all meet up

 

moony: can’t. i’m busy today

 

wormtail: same here^^^

 

padfoot: omg do you have a personal life outside the four of us???

 

moony: AHAHAHAHDSJDSBDSNSJNADSHJASHJADSBNNSADASDHBASDHBJSDJNSDJNDSJHJFDHDJFSHKDFSKJDJDFJKDFJSSDJNKASJKAJHSAJNASJNSANJASJNNJanjasbjsabhHbah

 

padfoot: he tripped lol

 

prongs: … no comments

 

moony: that was funny pads😭

 

wormtail: i have a meeting at 7pm about this new commercial and i need to assist people

wormtail: it’s very boring

 

padfoot: well you made it sound very boring

 

wormtail: HEY

wormtail: at least i don’t spend my evening eating 5 different types of cereal in bed and watching camp rock

 

moony: WAIT WHAT AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 

padfoot: DUDE???? thAT WAS A SECRET???

 

prongs: … i guess you could call pads a ceREAL KILLER

 

padfoot: that joke is outdated

 

prongs: not when i say it😎

 

wormtail: and also i don’t imitate playing on guitar while singing “otherwise they smell like feet to me”

 

padfoot: I GOT IT OKAY???

 

moony: always knew you were a nick jonas type of guy

moony: OUCH?

 

padfoot: eat your sandwich

 

moony: WHAT DID I DO WRONG🤨🤨🤨

 

padfoot: exist in my life

padfoot: OUCH????

padfoot: WHO TAUGHT YOU THROWING PUNCHES LIKE THAT IM GOING TO HAVE A BRUISE ON MY SHOULDER

 

moony: he is being dramatic

 

prongs: we know

 

wormtail: we know

 

padfoot: it’s actually a bruise

 

prongs: willis???🤯

 

moony: LOL WHAT

 

padfoot: I FORGOT THAT GUY EXISTED

 

wormtail: another day another why do i have notifications turned on for this chat

 

prongs: you love us!!!

 

padfoot: you can’t deny your unconditional love for us pete!!!💖💖💖

 

moony: also with whom are you gonna discuss 🕷🕷🕷🕷

 

wormtail: are you all done because LET’S PAY ATTENTION TO REMUS’S 🕷

 

moony: n a h

moony: and sirius is off his phone bc he saw a cat

 

prongs: CAT PICS RN WE NEED THEM

 

padfoot: it ran away :(((

padfoot: now i’m sad🥺

 

moony: oooh no

moony: milkshake time?🥺

 

padfoot: YUP!💞💞💞

 

prongs: where are you rn?

 

moony: near delmar’s but we are going to unicorn’s delicacy

moony: the best milkshakes with the most awful name

 

prongs: WAIT UP IM COMING

prongs: also wtf unicorn’s delicacy??? who thought it would be a great idea to name a place like that

 

padfoot: the décor is bothering me.

padfoot: it’s yellow and pink.

 

prongs: don’t throw up i’ll be there in 5

 

moony: JAMES TO THE RESCUE

 

prongs: JAMES TO THE RESCUE FROM THE WORST PLACE WITH THE BEST MILKSHAKES

 

padfoot: it used to be called unicorn’s paradise but i feel like i’m in my own hell

 

moony: JAMES YOU HAVE 3 MINUTES BEFORE HE BECOMES AN EXISTENTIAL MESS

 

wormtail: another day another how is sirius black still alive

 

padfoot: Good question, my dear friend. I suppose we should look further into this phenomenon.

 

wormtail: wtf

 

moony: JAMES TWO MINUTES

moony: aaaaand he is here. potter has rescued us from sirius’s existential crisis yet again

 

[The Maj & Aves]

1:29PM

 

aves: hey bestie !!!🥺🥺🥺

 

the maj: well hello aves!!! how’s your day?💞💞💞💞

 

aves: it’s been great! i met up with my friends

aves: just said bye to them and headed to the grocery store because we keep running out of milk meh

 

the maj: … we?

 

aves: yeah :) i share an apartment with two other people – my besties. i’ve known them since i was 8 y.o

 

the maj: wow. living with close friends sounds exciting. it’s like an infinite sleepover✨✨✨

 

aves: aww but i wish it were like that

 

the maj: oh nooooo! what’s happened?🥺

 

aves: adulthood

 

the maj: :(((((

the maj: tell me more about them!!!

 

aves: my bff helps his dad and does volunteering at different organizations bc he has nothing else to do

aves: and the other one has a full-time job and idk why he keeps living with us bc he can literally afford a 2-bedroom apartment in an area like soho

aves: i am busy on a regular basis but not as much as those two

aves: and there’s actually 4 of us… in our friend group. he doesn’t live with us and is busy 24/7

aves: like there are literally some days when he skips his 8 hours sleep and keeps himself awake for a few nights in a row. idk how he does that but i’m more terrified of the thought WHY he does that

 

the maj: has he explained to you?

 

aves: no but i suppose he is developing something big – a breakthrough for humanity lol

aves: he is the brainy one

 

the maj: haha, gotcha. and you?

 

aves: i am the hotter one ;)

aves: and the creative one

 

the maj: you are very self-confident and I respect that!!! 😎🤍

the maj: so the deal is… you can’t get together because of your schedule?

 

aves: pretty much yeah

aves: and i hate it

aves: i managed to see the brainy friendo and gosh idk how to explain this feeling. it felt like i haven’t seen him in ages

aves: which is partially true bc he blipped but i had seen him before this day

aves: and also my bff was there too

 

the maj: oh, sorry to hear about it. I’m glad you saw them today <3

the maj: i don't know how it felt living during the blip but it must have been scary...

 

1:35PM

 

the maj: are you okay, aves?

 

aves: yeah sorry

aves: your words sorta… triggered the memories

 

the maj: oH I AM SO SORRY!😭

 

aves: it’s okay maj!!! please don’t worry about it🥺

 

the maj: I didn’t mean to!

 

aves: i know :)

aves: but you are right

aves: it was so fucking hard sometimes. really hard and scary

 

the maj: oof dear

the maj: I’m sending my love to you thru the screen💞💞💞💞💖💖💖💖

the maj: I’m glad it’s over for the world and your friends are with you again xx

 

aves: love was received, the transmission was successful

aves: thank you💖

 

the maj: you are welcome :>

 

 

[THE LEGION: REPUTATION ERA]

3:30PM

 

Tony Stark: Hello everyone. I am happy to announce that you will be meeting this Friday. I will introduce you to the details and your duties as the initiative the Legion. There will also be Colonel James Rhodes, my friend, who is going to help you with settling down and will be your guide for a few weeks until you all feel ready to fight as a team.

Tony Stark: A few of you are flying from different countries so F.R.I.D.A.Y will help you to not get lost when you arrive at the Avengers Compound on Friday – the details of your flights can be found on your secured email boxes.

Tony Stark: The rest, you all are to arrive by 10 AM sharp(this is directed to Spider-man specifically). You may bring some stuff(clothes or gear) that you feel like leaving in your future rooms. I would also suggest you bring your suits to store at the AC.

Tony Stark: That’s it. You can freak out now.

 

hyle: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️

 

spider-man: Hyle, what the-

 

aves: WE ARE GOING TO HAVE OUR OWN ROOMS???? HOW COOL IS THAT??????😎😎😎😎

 

hyle: SUPER COOL AVES😎😎😎😎

 

aves: ITS SO COOL HYLE!!!! MEGA COOL!!! SUPER COOL!!!😎😎😎😎

 

frostbite: i can’t believe i will have to work with them

 

white fox: well at least we don’t have to share rooms

 

dora: the Avengers Compound is finally done?

 

Tony Stark: Yeah, it took a while. Rebuilding wasn’t the hardest part – the ground was. The damage, that was caused by us to nature, was so bad that there was a huge chance we wouldn’t be able to restore it.

Tony Stark: But thanks to some people, we managed to do that.

 

spider-man: It is in the same area, huh?

 

Tony Stark: Yes, but now it’s safe and hidden. The wizards and Wakandian technicians helped with it.

Tony Stark: For a mere civilian, the AC was destroyed and there’s only forest now.

Tony Stark: But not for us.

 

dora: this is very cool wow🤩 can't wait to see my future cave. im gonna spend my entire life in my new room

 

frostbite: same lol we can be cave buddies

 

dora: im down for the idea HAHA

 

frostbite: ITS A DEAL THEN

 

morph: just to make sure

morph: we are meeting on the 19th?

 

aves: yeah, it’s gonna be Friday 19th

 

morph: greatttttttt👌👌👌👌

 

Tony Stark: Any questions?

 

the maj: I have! where are we meeting?

 

Tony Stark: Oh yeah, a good one.

Tony Stark: Main building, main entrance. You are meeting up without me – you will have a tour of the place and then we will see each other. F.R.I.D.A.Y will be your 'tour guide'.

Tony Stark: Still, don’t be late, Spidey.

 

spider-man: Why do you specify ME?🤨

 

Tony Stark: You got late for one of our meetings because you saw a lost puppy.

 

spider-man: It was scared.

spider-man: and lonely.

 

hyle: did u find its owners? :(

 

spider-man: yes!!! it was so happy to see them

spider-man: I see it sometimes at Central Park bc its owners take it there every Tuesday.

 

white fox: why are you so cute🥺🥺🥺🥺💖💖💖💖💖

 

spider-man: Power of genetics😎

 

aves: i bet your face is cute too ;)

 

spider-man: ... thanks, man!

 

Tony Stark: Ahem…

Tony Stark: If you don’t have any more questions, I am closing the chat.

 

Tony Stark closed the group chat until further notice.

 

[Sirius & James]

3:45PM

 

lover boy: love, why r u screaming

 

killer queen: i am not screaming

 

lover boy: sirius u literally just yelled “i am not screaming” while typing the message🤨

 

killer queen: yeah but i am not screaming

 

lover boy: then im Madonna

 

killer queen: but u r not

 

lover boy: exactly.

lover boy: THAT’S THE POINT❗️

 

killer queen: OH SCREW YOU

killer queen: i think i embarrassed myself

 

lover boy: surprising case

 

killer queen: OI BRO?!!! WHY R U TURNING INTO MOONY????

 

lover boy: SORRY, THAT’S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU HANG OUT WITH HIM

lover boy: PLEASE CONTINUE.

 

killer queen: told a guy a compliment and received “thanks man”

killer queen: i hate myself

 

lover boy: OH LMAOOOO

lover boy: I AM SO SORRY PADS

 

killer queen: that’s why i am single

killer queen: i target straight people

killer queen: i am turning 26 in november and look at me sucking at dating stuff

killer queen: one-night stands are not my thing so i am literally suffering

 

lover boy: heeeey

lover boy: please don’t be sad, you are an incredible human being

 

killer queen: sometimes i don’t think that i am :///

 

lover boy: but you are. you deserve all the love in the world pads

lover boy: and i am sure you will find someone who will accept you for who you are, including your weird sense of humor and music taste

 

killer queen: Russian 80s rock is not weird bro

killer queen: AND WHAT DID MY HUMOR DO TO YOU

 

lover boy: nOTHING ILY

 

killer queen: ILYT BUT WTH

 

lover boy: you scare me sometimes with it, especially at night whenever u feel sad and emo

 

killer queen: i am not emo. it was A PHASE

 

lover boy: lol good one

 

killer queen: i don't like the influence that remus has had on you

killer queen: man i feel... old LMAO... i realized how much i am older than you. i can give u like life advice and stuff IM CRYIN'

 

lover boy: u r turning 26, i am 20. feels weird. 6 years 6 YEARS FFS

lover boy: next thing u know u r in ur 60s with 3 huskies by ur side and i come over for a piece of advice in birds and bees jkjskskjsk

 

killer queen: why 3

 

lover boy: u want 4?

 

killer queen: make it 15😎

 

lover boy: u r a risky old man sirius black-potter

 

killer queen: and you love me for that😎😎😎

 

lover boy: true. I love you so much bro

 

killer queen: I love you too

killer queen: and thank you for everything

 

lover boy: you would’ve done the same for me :)

lover boy: how about coke & b99? i got the ice machine working today

 

killer queen: !!!! COMIN' BBY

Chapter Text

[EMO BAND]

6:55PM

 

aves: BOOST MY BOTTOM

 

dora: what

 

spider-man: I am hoping I didn’t get the “Jessica is 5 minutes away from you” virus on my phone…

 

aves: GUYS PLEASE

aves: BOOST MY BOTTOM???

 

frostbite: OH LMAO I GOT IT

frostbite: IM BOOSTIIIIIIIIIIIINGGGGGG

 

aves: BOOST!!!!!! MY!!!!!! BOTTOM!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

frostbite: I AM BOOOSTIIIIIIIIING!!!!!!!!!!

 

aves: BOOOOST ITTTTTTTTTTT *SCREAMS*

 

frostbite: *SCREAMS TOO*

 

aves: everyone else you have one more chance to become my best friend

aves: time for me to get out there and…

 

the maj: OH, spread my wings!!!!

 

hyle: WRONG

hyle: IT’S SPREAD MY LEGS❗️❗️❗️

 

spider-man: Am I the only one who is confused?

 

morph: nope, i have no fucking idea what’s going on🤨

 

dora: my induction is it’s a reference

 

aves: why r u all acting like you’ve never seen brooklyn 99

 

morph: i haven’t

 

the maj: I DID AND I UNDERSTOOD THE REFERENCE BUT I DIDN’T WANT TO SAY THE LINE BOYLE HAD

 

white fox: WHY ARE YOU SCREAMING

 

the maj: I CAN’T TURN OFF THE CAPSLOCK

 

dora: maj just hit the button again

 

the maj: i did, twice, and it wouldn’t work

the maj: oh

the maj: it woRKED🕺🕺🕺

 

spider-man: I’ve seen like only one season of B99, and I don’t know whether I should go back to it

 

frostbite: YES

 

aves: YOU ARE MISSING ON THE BEST TV SHOW

 

hyle: WHAT HE SAID^^^^

 

spider-man: Oh. Now I must find some spare time for it

spider-man: nvm forgot I didn’t have ANY

 

white fox: my question is are u busy 24/7?

 

spider-man: no

spider-man: it’s actually 24/8

 

morph: why do you keep changing the way you type🤔

 

spider-man: Idk

spider-man: Sometimes I’m too lazy to turn the autocaps off

 

aves: it’s literally one button-

 

spider-man: forgot I didn’t care

 

aves: guys he is being mean😭😭😭

 

dora: are you in your busy bitch era spidey

 

spider-man: LMAO NO IM SORRY

spider-man: I forget people here don’t know me irl

 

frostbite: wow u have friends?

 

spider-man: EXCUSE ME???

 

frostbite: and u r sarcastic irl gotchu

 

frostbite changed spider-man’s nickname to insertsarcasmhere

 

insertsarcasmhere:

insertsarcasmhere: im done here goodbye

 

insertsarcasmhere left the group chat

 

hyle: NO COME BACK WE WON’T BE MEAN

 

frostbite: speak for yourself lol

 

hyle: U R NOT HELPING

 

frostbite: oh well that’s unfortunate

 

insertsarcasmhere returned to the group chat

insertsarcasmhere changed their nickname to spider-man

 

spider-man: i’ve decided to stay

 

the maj: how come

 

spider-man: at least someone has to be the responsible one

 

frostbite: LMAOOOOO😭😭😭😭😭😭

 

white fox: L O L

 

aves: true though

 

dora: RESPONSIBLE????

dora: DIDN’T YOU LIKE FLY TO SPACE EVEN AFTER MR STARK TOLD YOU THAT YOU WEREN’T INVITED?????🤩🤩🤩🤩

 

spider-man: wait HOW DO YOU KNOW

 

dora: dora milaje have ears

dora: and the avengers gc on okoye’s phone

dora: sometimes we read out loud messages and mimic their voices😎

 

hyle: oh so ur name is dora bc u r dora milaje?

 

dora: sorta

dora: im from the training unit for future dora milaje

 

morph: are we just gonna ignore the whole gc mimicking thing?

 

the maj: idc i do that with wong and dr strange all the time

 

morph:

 

aves: GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️

 

white fox: what do you want

 

aves: we’re meeting on friday for the first time!!!🥺🥺🥺🥺

 

hyle: OH YES THANK YOU FOR REMINDING ME

hyle: im so excited to meet all of you❗️❗️❗️❗️🥺🥺🥺🥺

 

frostbite: cool i will be able to bully everyone in person

 

the maj: i think our meet-up is going to cause chaos to this planet

 

spider-man: you are not the only one who thinks that

 

morph: i’m genuinely terrified

 

white fox: why are you so boring

 

dora: don’t bother, I bet they buckle up in a car🙄

 

morph: you don’t???????

 

aves: listen all of you

aves: what if we get to know each other? like we could do something in chat so when we meet up we will feel comfortable u know

 

the maj: that’s actually a good idea aves!!!

 

hyle: im down!

 

frostbite: me too

 

white fox: me tHREE

 

dora: +

 

morph: i don’t mind that :)

 

aves: @spider-man ???

 

spider-man: oh yeah sorry

spider-man: idk i may actually not participate in this whole thing bc i’m very busy rn

 

aves: gotcha no worries

aves: so… any ideas?

 

frostbite: are we revealing our names or smth?

 

the maj: let me rephrase that frostbite!!!

the maj: who feels comfortable here to reveal their identity?

the maj: we are going to work together, and i personally feel okay with stating my real name 🥺💖

 

white fox: it’s not like my real name is not already on the S.H.I.E.L.D files so ofc im good👌🏼

 

hyle: saME

hyle: maj has a point !!! we are going to work together as a team and u know having a mask is sorta like not trusting others

 

morph: make sense

morph: im in!!!😁

spider-man: I’m going to take time to think about it, but you can start

 

dora: okie

dora: im down with the idea too btw

 

aves: me too so wait a sec

aves: list your name, star sign, pronouns, and one fun fact about you

aves: and let’s also change our nicknames here to our real names so we can learn them by friday!!!😎

 

hyle: DEAL

 

the maj: yay!

 

frostbite: who goes first?

 

morph: not me lol

 

dora: i’ve talked about myself already so i might as well go first

dora: hey everyone! my name is dorcas but u can call me cas(like THE angel ffs). taurus, she/they(comfortable with the latter more) and fun fact I rode an elephant when I was 5 and broke my ribs

 

spider-man: how is that a fun fact-

 

dora: shut up arachnid👺👺👺👺

 

frostbite: it’s so nice to meet u cas don’t forget that u r my cave buddy!!!

 

dora: trust me i won’t :))💞💞💞💞

 

dora changed their nickname to dorcas

 

dorcas: cave buddy!!! wanna go next?

 

frostbite: sUUUUreEEEE

frostbite: WHATS UP BITCHES my name is marlene. gemini, she/her and fun fact i used to have a fan account dedicated to natasha romanoff on insta🤩🤩🤩🤩

 

white fox: what a TASTE

 

aves: she was a wholesome person

 

white fox: agree, i worked with her a couple of times

 

dorcas: but tbh she awakened THE lesbian in me😭💖

 

frostbite: same :)

 

dorcas: OH

dorcas: i feel happy that im not the only one on this team <3333

 

frostbite: hehe💖💖💖

 

frostbite changed their nickname to marls

 

marls: so who’s next

 

the maj: I can!!!

the maj: i’m lily, aquarius, she/her and fun fact about me i love taylor swift and one time i teleported to her concert because i couldn’t afford the tickets and then i was scolded by wong

the maj: this bitch literally did the same but to BEYONCE’S CONCERT

 

marls: LMAO I ADORE THIS

 

hyle: lily is a beautiful name!!!

 

aves: its’s so nice to learn your name lily <3

 

the maj: omg u r all so cute ily🥺💖

 

the mag changed their nickname to lily

 

lily: NEEEXXTTTT

 

white fox: ME ME MEEEE

white fox: BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE, i’m happy to announce that you are lucky to know one and only MARY or MEEEEEEEE. i may sound very shy in the chat but it’s because i need some time to adjust <3 i go by she/her and fun fact i’m asexual so please don’t make sex jokes about me

 

spider-man: nice to meet you

 

hyle: i swear if someone makes a sex joke about u im going to beat them up🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

 

aves: violence is not acceptable unless the person is a dick

 

marls: preach lmao

 

white fox changed their nickname to mcmary

 

mcmary: just mary seemed very boring

 

dorcas: so… i figured that the rest are the boys, right? sorry if im wrong

 

aves: you are not cas i can speak for myself that im a dude

 

morph: same here

 

hyle: yup

 

spider-man: yes

 

dorcas: then u r up next !!!!

aves: oh okay

aves: beware that my name is very weird

 

marls: is it jeremiah or smth

 

aves: LMAO WHAT😭

 

marls: please don’t tell me that your name is john or chris or james or steve

 

hyle: what did a james do to you

 

marls: it’s basic

 

hyle: ?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓

 

mcmary: wtf😐

 

hyle changed their nickname to james

 

james: MY NAME IS JAMES

 

marls: still basic🥺

 

lily: MARLENE

 

marls: okaaaay ill shut up

 

aves: it’s so cool james my bff is called james too

 

james: OH REALLY? i would love to meet him

 

aves: i think u would be good friends because u radiate with the same energy

 

james: HAHA

james: but continue aves i don’t wanna steal your thunder anymore🙌🙌🙌🙌

 

aves: OH YEAH

aves: ahem🗣🗣🗣

aves: hi i’m sirius, SCORPIO😎, he/him and fun fact about me - i discovered that i was a synesthete about two weeks ago when i was experiencing another existential crisis. i would also like to add that i have multiple forms of synesthesia !!!

 

marls: i take it back. sirius wins over jeremiah

 

lily: MARLS FFS

lily: it’s so nice to learn your name!!!

 

morph: NO FUCKING WAY

 

james: WHAT THE ACTUAL HELL?????????

 

aves changed their nickname to sirius

 

sirius: what😐

 

james: PADFOOT?

 

sirius: WHAT

sirius: WAIT.

sirius: PRONGS??????????!!!!!!!!!!

 

james: YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

morph changed their nickname to peterpet

 

peterpet: GUYS?????????

 

james: WHAT THE FUCK WORMY?????????????????

 

sirius: WHAT THE FUCK WORMTAIL???????????????????????????

 

dorcas: what is happening…???

 

lily: wait…

lily: OMFG🤯🤯🤯🤯

 

marls: WHAT

 

lily: sirius told me in dms that he has a group of friends and he lives with them

 

mcmary: O H

 

dorcas: GUYS ARE YOU ALRIGHT?😭😭😭

 

james: we are ALL LEFT

 

sirius: FUCCCCKKKKK MYYYY LIIIIIFEEEE ARE YOU KIDDIIING MEEEEEE

 

peterpet: so for you to understand, james and sirius are excitedly screaming at each other while also jumping and I am in shock

 

marls: HOW COULD YOU NOT FIGURE OUT WHO YOU WERE ALL THIS TIME????

 

peterpet: IDK

 

marls: men are so stupid🙄

 

dorcas: lmao agree🙄

dorcas: happy to be attracted to women🥰🥰🥰🥰

 

mcmary: im biromantic so can relate too

 

lily: im sorry im laughing so hard rn

lily: imagine we will have to work with them in a team

 

marls: i regret my decision

 

mcmary: well idk i think this whole thing is gonna be hilarious

 

dorcas: lmao

dorcas: @spider-man u there?

 

spider-man: 50/50 I’m confused by what I’m reading

spider-man: and I’m trying to not get myself killed so sorry can’t type HEY MISTER STOP THAT

 

dorcas: gl

 

8:30PM

 

marls: @peterpet @james @sirius are you dead or smth

 

sirius: no, we’re good

sirius: we had to take a moment and talk about this whole situation lmao

 

mcmary: so everything’s fine?

 

james: yup!

james: can we continue our introductions?

 

lily: sure!

 

dorcas: go on james

 

james: YAY

james: WHATS UP im james, aries, he/him, and fun fact about me is im related to thor in… some way

 

marls: are you a himbo lol

 

james: NO

 

peterpet: he is literally studying anthropology and global public health

 

james: im a smart boi🤓

 

mcmary: cuuuuute nice 2 meet u💖💖💖💖

 

james: <3

 

dorcas: but how are you related to thor

 

james: oh

james: … im a demigod…?

 

sirius: WHAT

 

peterpet: MAN C’MON WHAT ELSE DO YOU HAVE UP UR SLEEVE

 

james: NOTHING I’LL TELL EVERYONE LATER ABOUT IT

james: SIRIUS STOP THROWING DINOSAUR PLUSHIES AT ME THEY ARE REMUS’S

 

sirius: ARE YOU GONNA TELL HIM???

 

james: ARE YOU???

 

peterpet: we can do it altogether

 

sirius: well sounds like a plan to me

 

james: same✌️

 

lily: sorry to bother you – is remus the fourth member?

 

peterpet: yeah, he doesn’t live with us and well probably doesn’t have any superpowers

peterpet: he is a nerd though maybe he is a telepath

 

spider-man: oh really

 

peterpet: yeah

 

marymc: peter it’s your turn

 

peterpet: sureeee!

peterpet: i’m peter, capricorn, he/him, and fun fact about me i make 5 digits in a HR company

 

marls: that’s not fun that’s just dull

 

sirius: THAT’S WHAT IVE BEEN TRYING TO TELL HIM FOR THE PAST TWO YEARS

 

peterpet: pads

 

sirius: oi what

 

peterpet: how’s your crush on nick jonas?

 

sirius: DUDE

 

mcmary: OH WELL

 

lily: AHAHAHHAHA

 

james: it’s too bad remus is not here he would roast the shit out of sirius

 

marls: i really wanna meet this remus guy you’ve been talking about

 

peterpet: he is sirius’s soulmate

 

sirius: liar liar pants on fire👺👺👺👺

sirius: we should talk to him after this though…

 

james: yes, definitely

 

dorcas: we have one member left to introduce himself

dorcas: @spider-man dude come here

 

spider-man: oh

spider-man: nope, I’m not doing that

spider-man: you are going to see me on friday so i don’t see the point

 

mcmary: but we all introduced ourselves

 

spider-man: yeah, and that’s on you

spider-man: I never agreed to that so I’m sorry

 

lily: it’s okay! as long as you feel comfortable🥺

 

james: i agree with lily

 

sirius: same :)

 

marls: yeah ig me too

 

spider-man: thanks

 

peterpet: @james @sirius let’s discuss our plan on telling moony about us

 

sirius: sure

sirius: ttyl girls!

 

dorcas: im nb !!!

 

sirius: OH SORRY

sirius: have a goodnight girls boy and nb person!

 

dorcas: thx

 

sirius: np

 

[Dorcas & Remus]

8:50PM

 

dorythefish: remsssss

 

remitherat: yes?

 

dorythefish: u r fucked🤩

 

remitherat: trust me I KNOW

 

dorythefish: THESE ARE YOUR BEST FRIENDS???? REALLY MAN???

 

remitherat: well i didn’t get to pick them actually

remitherat: they sorta forced me to become a part of their cult

remitherat: and then sirius kicked a football into my face…

 

dorythefish: unbelievable

dorythefish: r u gonna tell them?

 

remitherat: idk

remitherat: i would rather see them on friday you know bc i don’t like explaining stuff over text + i’m gonna be busy with this new presentation at SI

 

dorythefish: i get that

dorythefish: so

dorythefish: the whole “i want to protect them” idea just… vanished, huh

 

remitherat: I had no fucking clue that they possessed superpowers

remitherat: like they still have no clue that I am spider-man lmao

 

dorythefish: sorry but they are so stupid lmao

 

remitherat: they are oblivious, not exactly stupid

remitherat: but yeah lol

remitherat: how could I not recognize sirius in aves back then…

 

dorythefish: maybe that wasn’t that important because u know there was the fate of the entire universe at stake

dorythefish: plus u were too tired

 

remitherat: makes sense

 

dorythefish: soooo……… friday?

 

remitherat: yeah, friday

 

dorythefish: sighs

dorythefish: it’s going to be such a mess

Chapter Text

[THE MARAUDERS(((REAL!!!)))]

10:04PM

 

prongs: i think we need to talk

 

padfoot: oh really

 

wormtail: i’m here for the laughs and i am willing to die like a man

 

padfoot: since when r u a man🗿

 

wormtail: ??? wanna check???

 

padfoot: NO

 

prongs: i think we’re missing someone🤔🤔🤔🤔

 

padfoot: damn right my man u r always so right

 

prongs: it’s because of the glasses. they make me smort

 

padfoot: smort

padfoot: and now you’ve ruined your reputation

 

prongs: i’ll definitely get it back watch me

 

padfoot: 👁👄👁

 

prongs: ✨idiosyncrasy✨

 

wormtail: did you just google random smart words

 

prongs: no

prongs: … yeah maybe

 

wormtail: where did u get that one from?

 

prongs: «50 Words That Make You Sound Smart»

 

padfoot: LMAO

padfoot: wtf does it even mean

 

prongs: “an unusual feature of a person”

 

padfoot: lol

padfoot: james your idiosyncrasy is your smart brain

 

prongs: idk whether i should be happy or go listen to glass animals

 

wormtail: don’t u listen to them when u r happy?

 

prongs: HUH???????????

prongs: SINCE UH 👆🏻 WHEN

 

padfoot: this is hilarious

padfoot: gosh i love your obsession with glass animals

 

prongs: it’s my idiosyncrasy

 

wormtail: james i don’t know if you used this word right

wormtail: i honestly don’t know if any of you used this word right

 

prongs: but it makes us sound smart

 

padfoot: *smort

padfoot: true

 

wormtail: … unbelievable u two

 

prongs: i love you guys but i think we got sidetracked

 

padfoot: oh really

 

prongs: stfu

prongs: @moony

 

padfoot: @moony

 

wormtail: @moony

 

padfoot: @moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony@moony

 

moony: you do realize that @ me multiple times in one message doesn’t actually send me notifications for the number of times you did that

 

padfoot: but it worked

 

moony: meh. guess you are right

 

prongs: can we talk, please?

 

moony: about what? did something happen?

 

prongs: about… everything?

 

moony: what-

 

wormtail: now you are just scaring him james

wormtail: it’s nothing important remus

wormtail: well… no it’s actually important but it’s not as big as james is trying to make out of it

 

padfoot: ?????? it’s not?????

 

moony: eh one sec

 

[Dorcas & Remus]

10:06PM

 

remitherat: *screenshot attached*

remitherat: CAAAAASSSSSSSS SOS

 

10:08PM

 

remitherat: YOU READ THE MESSAGE YOU-

remitherat: it’s because i did that yeah

 

10:10PM

 

remitherat: … i can’t believe that i’m about to do this

remitherat: ahem…

remitherat: SO WHEN YOU’RE NEAR ME

remitherat: DARLING CAN’T YOU HEAR ME–

 

dorythefish: S O S❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️

 

remitherat: YOU.

 

dorythefish: bye👋

 

remitherat: NO

remitherat: PLEASE

remitherat: HELP ME CAS

 

dorythefish: i will if you admit your love for mamma mia

 

remitherat: NO

 

dorythefish: then bye loser

 

remitherat: OKAY

remitherat: I’LL DO THAT

remitherat: I LOVE MAMMA MIA

remitherat: AND ESPECIALLY SKY

 

dorythefish: you didn’t have to add the last part but good to know

 

remitherat: now PLEASE help me

 

dorythefish: how

 

remitherat: pick me up and drown me in the ocean???

 

dorythefish: so you could avoid the embarrassment? no

dorythefish: but that’d be fun

dorythefish: can spiders swim?🤔

 

remitherat: you can find out

 

dorythefish: n o

dorythefish: dude you are spider-man and can’t play cool?

 

remitherat: i just usually… don’t

 

dorythefish: no wonder why u r single

 

remitherat: thanks😑

 

dorythefish: u r welcome

dorythefish: but tbh just act natural

dorythefish: im sure they won’t be suspicious of you

 

remitherat: AGHHHH okay will do that thanks cas have a good… what time is it in wakanda?

 

dorythefish: it’s 6 am

 

remitherat: oh then gm

 

dorythefish: gn and gl

 

[THE MARAUDERS(((REAL!!!)))]

10:11PM

 

padfoot: i wonder what is taking him so long

 

prongs: i say he is in the shower

 

moony: i was when you texted me

 

wormtail: welcome back

 

moony: thx

moony: so… what’s up?

 

padfoot: uuuuuhhhh

padfoot: … james?

 

prongs: don’t worry i gotcha

prongs: before you freak out about what I’m going to tell you I want you to know that we are still your best friends, and we are still the people you’ve known since we were kids

 

moony: did u kill someone🤨

 

prongs: WHAT? NO

prongs: STOP DISTRACTING ME❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️

 

moony: i'm so confused(also omg he is capitalizing Is wtf)

 

prongs: okay I shall continue

prongs: we have something that we want to tell you. and we hope it won’t scare you away

prongs:

prongs: … okay here it goes

prongs: remus, we have superpowers and also superhero identities. I’m known as hyle. I’m a demigod from asgard

 

wormtail: and i’m morph… i can morph into whatever living creature there is

 

padfoot: and im aves – the vigilante. that one. remember we’ve talked about him

 

moony: oh

moony: wow

moony: cool.

 

padfoot: cool????? that’s all you can say???

 

moony: sorry

moony: i need some time to process that you are… people with quirks

 

wormtail: title of the marauders’ sex tape

 

padfoot: P E T E

 

prongs: it’s alright moony. take your time

 

moony: i just have one question

moony: or two… idk

moony: maybe even more

moony: why tell me now? after all these years?

 

padfoot: wait… you think we were hiding everything from you all this time?

 

moony: … yes?

 

wormtail: lmao no

wormtail: we literally found out about each other today and then decided that it would be the right thing for you to know too

 

moony: OH

moony: sorry

moony: but i don’t think that i have any superpowers

moony: im just an ordinary guy🧍

 

wormtail: you are remus. you are not an ordinary guy

 

padfoot: yes!!! you are our remus <3 pain in the ass

 

moony: im going to hunt you down tonight

 

padfoot: kinky💖💖💖💖💖

 

prongs: GUYS PLEASE

 

moony: well… tell me about your superpowers later, okay?

 

wormtail: of course!

 

prongs: we will

 

 padfoot: then… goodnight?

 

moony: yeah im very tired

 

prongs: gn!

 

wormtail: gn my lovely people

 

padfoot: awwww pete

 

wormtail: i will take it back

 

padfoot: oK GN

 

[Sirius & James]

10:20PM

 

killer queen: do you think he’s going to be okay?

 

lover boy: you mean moony?

 

killer queen: yeah, he seemed off

 

lover boy: i’m sure he’s just tired and needs some time to process the news like he said

 

killer queen: should i talk to him?

 

lover boy: no, let me do it instead

lover boy: go to sleep, pads

 

killer queen: okay

killer queen: goodnight brother ily

 

lover boy: gn bro ilyt💞

 

[Remus & James]

10:23PM

 

deer god: hey, you asleep?

 

moonshine: i was preparing to go to sleep

 

deer god: oh, sorry

deer god: we can talk later

 

moonshine: it’s fine i’m bored anyway

moonshine: what’s up?

 

deer god: are you okay?

 

moonshine: what do you mean?

 

deer god: i mean you seemed strange in the chat

 

moonshine: oh

moonshine: sorry about that

moonshine: i’ve been very busy for the past week

moonshine: and plus the news just hit me differently you know lol

 

deer god: yeah, definitely!

deer god: what have you been working on?

 

moonshine: well… to be short, there’s going to be a new presentation at SI. upgraded prosthetics for disabled people, and i was asked to present it… since i’ve been helping a lot with this project

moonshine: it’s going to be in the mid of august, but i need to make sure that everything is working the way it should be

 

deer god: wow

deer god: WOW

deer god: REMUS THAT’S LIKE A BIG DEAL, RIGHT???

 

moonshine: please don’t remind me of that bc i may start freaking out

moonshine: BUT YES IT IS

 

deer god: I CAN’T BELIEVE IT❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️

 

moonshine: ME NEITHER

 

deer god: CONGRATS!!!

 

moonshine: THANKS!!!

 

deer god: but performing in front of thousands of people live-

 

moonshine: now tell me why you had to do that

 

deer god: I AM SORRY MOONY

deer god: it’s going to be okay !!!

deer god: you will nail it!

 

moonshine: thank you

 

deer god: who offered you the position?

 

moonshine: uh…

moonshine: it might have been mr stark himself…

 

deer god: WHAT

deer god: THE

deer god: FUCK

 

moonshine: lol

 

deer god: IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU

deer god: CAN I TELL OTHERS???

deer god: BC I CANT KEEP SECRETS

 

moonshine: well you did hide your secret identity

 

deer god: … oh yeah

deer god: but PLEEEEASEEEE?????

 

moonshine: sure

moonshine: i’m going to sleep though

 

deer god: okay!!!! goodnight moons!!!

 

moonshine: goodnight prongs <3

 

 

***

REMUS LUPIN’S NOTES

 

July 18, 2024 at 8:16AM

 

 

Good morning, notes.

I barely slept through the night, too bothered with anxiety and my thoughts. Haven’t had anything like that in a month. Thought it would never happen again, but here we are.

It’s killing me. This feeling. I’m drowning in my own thoughts with no help.

Tomorrow. Everything’s going to change, and I am not mentally prepared for that. I am genuinely scared, and I don’t know who I can talk to about this. I don’t want to bother Dorcas, they probably don’t have time for me.

Tomorrow. Tomorrow. Tomorrow. Tomorrow. Tomorrow. Tomorrow. Tomorrow. Tomorrow. Tomorrow. Tomorrow. Tomorrow. Tomorrow.

What would MJ say about this?

wait

fuck

mj

mj.

that’s it.

it’s time. moony, it’s time to fix this.

 ***

[Remus & MJ]

9:45AM

 

remus: hey mj

 

mj: well, hello there. didn’t think i’d hear from you anything at this point.

 

remus: look. i am very sorry about that. like, actually very sorry.

remus: i know i haven’t spoken to a lot of people after the whole mysterio accident with him hacking EDITH – the only thing that tony gave to me as a birthday present with that unfunny joke «even dead i am the hero». he literally said: well i created a huge ass technology for you so if i die you inherit the most powerful weapon on the planet and then he didn’t and still gave it to me and left that fucking DEAD in the acronym because he thought it sounded badass i honestly hate this badass part of his because he lives like every day is his last day and i don’t like it. but this is not important.

remus: i am speaking from my heart right now. i drifted away from many people, including aunt may, because i got fucking scared. this whole event still gives me nightmares, especially about ned being almost fucking killed on that ferris wheel like I TOLD HIM NOT TO GET OUT BUT HE STILL DID.

remus: i can’t blame him or any of you. and it’s because i blame myself. i put you all in danger and i feel nauseous about it so… i am sorry. genuinely sorry.

 

mj: wow. apology accepted. from me AND ned.

mj: he is sitting beside me, sipping on this awful chemical slurpee.

 

remus: but it’s his favorite so he won’t listen to anyone and won’t stop drinking it

 

mj: he says, quote “that’s the exact idea bro”

 

remus: gosh i love you guys. i missed you soooo much

 

mj: ew. love affection. gross.

 

remus: agree

remus: how are you? how’s your leg?

 

mj: not so bad. it’s been getting better. my family is treating me like i’m still at the hospital connected to the ventilator. i hated those three weeks. you are lucky to regenerate fast.

mj: i still have to visit the hospital every week for a check-up.

 

remus: you know i would have shared my ability with you if it meant for you to get out of that place already. but i can’t

 

mj: mysterio hit me too hard with that drone. no gentleman.

 

remus: sorry

 

mj: don’t. it’s not your fault that this had happened.

 

remus: it is

 

mj: we are closing this discussion because I’m right and you can’t prove me wrong. so, stop whining.

 

remus: i hate when you do that

remus: can I now ask you about something?

 

mj: yeah, go ahead.

 

remus: remember when we were on the bridge that night and i wanted to come out to you as gay but then the whole hologram thing came up and i told you i was spider-man?

 

mj: no.

mj: I remember how we were on the bridge that night and I wanted to come out to you as lesbian but then the whole hologram thing came up and you told me that you were quote, ”I am Spider-Gay”.

 

remus: in my defense, I was nervous

 

mj: okay, spidey-gay.

 

remus: wtf why does it even rhyme

 

mj: it’s in your genes. like. literally.

mj: but what was your actual question?

 

remus: well… uh… okay, here it goes. how did it feel?

 

mj: to learn that you were gay? proud.

 

remus: mj ffs

 

mj: i’m messing with you.

mj: i’m gonna say this and later you will pretend it didn’t happen.

 

remus: deal.

 

mj: when i learned that you were spider-man, it was a very unique feeling like… you touched the holy grail or something. it was special because i felt trusted. i knew how much you didn’t want to reveal your secret identity for the purpose of my safety but this whole journey in europe was both dangerous and exciting. and now, being a part of the spidey team, i feel like i can do something while being powerless(i mean that i don’t have superpowers. i am powerful in my own way) through you. and when i discovered that that nerd, who likes building lego, helped the avengers save the world, it just made me think of how grateful i am to be your friend. the end.

 

remus:

remus: I suddenly need a tissue

 

mj: why are you always so emotional?

 

remus: i used to not be that emotional but after getting the spider bite my senses and feelings came on another level and i can’t help it

 

mj: here goes your weakness. you are very sentimental.

 

remus: *emotionally wipes off his tears*

 

mj: why did you ask?

 

remus: about what?

 

mj: are you sure that after you got bitten by a spider you didn’t lose half of your brain?

 

remus: ouch

 

mj: speak.

 

remus: it’s just… remember the marauders?

 

mj: that awful gang of yours?

 

remus: yeah and ouch again

 

mj: yup, wished you’d send me an invite to become a member or something. i literally helped you with your pranks in the grad year.

 

remus: i’ll work on that

remus: but yeah, them

remus: i told you that i didn’t want at any cost to reveal my secret identity to them

remus: and well

remus: something’s about to happen. i can’t tell you yet but after that they will know

 

mj: huh? and HOW did you fuck up that part?

 

remus: ouch x3

remus: but i didn’t. i can’t tell you yet what this is all about

 

mj: so… they will find out not on purpose?

 

remus: you could say that, yeah

 

mj: and you can’t stop it?

 

remus: you could say that, yeah x2

 

mj: and now you are terrified that you are about to put them in danger?

 

remus: you could say that, yeah x3

 

mj: and you are probably afraid to talk to them?

 

remus: you could say that, yeah x4

 

mj: how on earth you are still walking and not dead because of your anxiety...

 

remus: i honestly don’t know

 

mj: remus, this is a big deal.

 

remus: yes it is and i’m terrified

 

mj: well, i really have to go now(work), but i might as well say something.

mj: I know you and I know how scared you are to talk to them but please remember that they are your friends. you’ve known them longer than anybody else and they’ve known you longer than anybody else. your friendship is incredible, tbh. just be you, okay? don’t be spider-man, be remus lupin. and if you don’t know what to say then don’t. actions speak louder than words.

 

remus: oh okay. thank you. you are the best

 

mj: that i know as a fact. i’ll ttyl, okay?

 

remus: okay!

 

mj: and remus.

 

remus: yeah?

 

mj: don’t drift away anymore.

 

remus: i won’t, mj

Chapter Text

[THE MARAUDERS(((REAL!!!)))]

 

3:45PM

 

prongs: blue alert blue alert BLUE ALERT EVERYONE

 

wormtail: what’s going on?

 

moony: if i recall this correctly blue alert stands for sirius feeling lonely and in need of a lover

 

padfoot: AM NOTTTTTTTTTT WTF

padfoot: oKAAAAAY maybe a lil bit… i saw this cute gay couple on internet AND YOU NOW HOW I HATE BEING SINGLE

padfoot: LIKE CMON LOOK AT ME IM SO PERFECT WHY AM I SINGLE😭😭😭😭

padfoot: THIS IS NOT FAIR

padfoot: IMFAIR???

padfoot: UNFAIR THAT’S THE WORD

 

moony: i love it when he knows his vocabulary🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

 

wormtail: maybe this is because you misplaced your socks with captain america and got them in the washing machine along with white clothes, causing us all to wear the US national flag colors for a week last month?

 

padfoot: that’s rude of you to point out when a man is having a gay crisis over how alone he is

 

moony: i agree, how dare you, peter?

 

prongs: me too. you truly disappointed us

 

wormtail: OH YOU KNOW WHAT

wormtail: you do know that you have each other, right?

wormtail: i mean i can see sirius and remus having a real relationship bc they are perfect for each other

 

moony: huh i can’t stand the guy how dare you🤨

 

padfoot: sweethearrrrttttt @moony

 

moony: GO AWAY EW👺👺👺

 

prongs: u r saying im not perfect for my bff?

 

padfoot: yes whats up with that dude^^^

 

wormtail: I’m saying your family, JAMES, literally adopted sirius

 

prongs: OH

prongs: MAKES SENSE

 

moony: big brain time completed

 

padfoot: IM STILL LONELYYYYY GUUUYSSS

 

wormtail: @moony

 

moony: don’t look at me, pin @prongs instead

 

prongs: c’mon buddy let me give you kisses on the head and hugs until you fall asleep

 

wormtail: it’s only 4pm james🤨

 

prongs: who cares

 

padfoot: who cares

 

prongs: yo moonYYYYYY

prongs: come oooovvvveeeerrrr for james cuddles mooooonyyyyyyyy

 

moony: i can’t right now i’m doing hot girl shit

moony: and ill probably not be able to see you for the next few weeks

 

padfoot: WHAT JKGFKDFKODFLSJFEJILD

 

prongs: he just dropped his phone on his face

 

moony: pads?

 

padfoot: im okay

 

prongs: he’s not okay

 

moony: nice mcr reference

moony: what’s he doing rn?

 

prongs: he is feeling proud of you for mentioning mcr

 

moony: i regret that

 

padfoot: ahem now that you’ve mentioned it

padfoot: for all the dirty looks

 

prongs: remus ffs

 

moony: what? i was just chillin’

 

padfoot: the photographs your boyfriend took

 

moony: oh god now i get it

 

padfoot: remember when you broke YOUR FOOT

 

prongs: so guys how’s it going

 

wormtail: i’m banning u from my life remus

 

moony: im gonna cry brb🏃🏼🏃🏼🏃🏼🏃🏼

 

prongs: DO NOT

 

wormtail: LEAVE US

 

padfoot: from jumping out the SECOND FLOOR?

 

prongs: well it was nice knowing you guys

 

padfoot: IM NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT OOOOOOOOOKAAAAAAAAAY

 

moony: how am I friends with you

 

padfoot: IM NOT OKAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYAYYYAYAYYAYAYYAYYYYAAAYYYYY

 

wormtail: same question

 

padfoot: iM NOT OOOKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYY

padfoot: YOU WEAR ME OOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUTTTTTT

padfoot: *ELECTRO GUITAR PLAYING WHILE IM SCREAMING*

 

prongs: honey are you done

 

padfoot: yes

 

prongs: thanks god

 

padfoot: except

padfoot: WHAT WILL IT TAKE TO SHOW YOU THAT IT'S NOT THE LIFE IT SEEMS?

 

wormtail: have a good day everyone

 

padfoot: I'VE TOLD YOU TIME AND TIME AGAIN YOU SING THE WORDS BUT DON'T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS

 

moony: D U D E

 

[Remus & Dorcas]

8:23PM

 

dorythefish: so im packing my suitcase or whatever this is

dorythefish: listening to the queen billie eilish

dorythefish: suddenly shuri comes in like she owns this place and SMASHES ME WITH AN APPLE PIE???☠️☠️☠️☠️

 

remitherat: HAHAHJKFDKLLKDKJJAHJHA

 

dorythefish: SHE JUST SAYS “FEEL THE AMERICAN VIBE” AND LEAVES

dorythefish: I RUN AFTER HER

dorythefish: AND ALL DORA MILAJE ARE JUST STARING AT ME LIKE THIS

dorythefish: 😐

dorythefish: APPARENTLY I RAN AROUND IN APPLE PIE MAKE-UP

dorythefish: ANDDDDDD im never coming back im changing my id and staying in ny

 

remitherat: was the pie good?

 

dorythefish: it’s like made from heaven my goshhh I ate myself

 

remitherat: … is that even possible?

 

dorythefish: yes if you

dorythefish: wait

dorythefish: omG REMUS STOP YOUR DIRTY MIND YOU NAUGHTY BOY🤺🤺🤺🤺🤺

dorythefish: EEEEWWWW

 

remitherat: trust me dirty and my name are two things that cannot be combined into a sentence

remitherat: in case you haven’t noticed i’m weird

remitherat: i’m a weirdo i don't fit in. and i don't want to fit in. have you ever seen me without this stupid mask on? that's weird.

 

dorythefish: i bet u r one of those people who unironically watched the entire show

 

remitherat: dorcas i have a LIFE for your information

remitherat: and no, sirius did and i question his taste in tv shows everyday

 

dorythefish: i mean from your stories you seem pretty close to share your dirty pleasures with each other

 

remitherat: it’s not his dirty pleasure, dorcas.

remitherat: he owns the merch.

 

dorythefish: if i were you i would’ve blocked him from my life already

 

remitherat: i love him so i forgive his love for… that

 

dorythefish: that’s sweet

 

remitherat: yes, but if you tell him about it tomorrow i’m going to make you run 178 laps around the compound

 

dorythefish: you can’t frighten me with that, i do it in trainings

 

remitherat: i–

remitherat: can i question this?

 

dorythefish: please don’t i hate it here

dorythefish: moving to ny is like a new chapter in my life that i need

 

remitherat: you don’t like wakanda?

 

dorythefish: NO i do and i love the nature and the culture

dorythefish: it’s just… after i came out i feel like this place isn’t home anymore

 

remitherat: i’m sorry. i didn’t know it was like that there

 

dorythefish: we are an advanced civilization but the traditions are… still there for some reason

dorythefish: im just sad it turned out like this

dorythefish: but maybe it’s for the best

 

remitherat: not maybe!

remitherat: it is!

remitherat: if it makes you feel better i’m gay :)

remitherat: so… you are not going to be alone

remitherat: and if anything, you can always talk to me

 

dorythefish: aw thank you

dorythefish: but i don’t think that you can give good ideas on how to pick up a girl

dorythefish: or just any person

 

remitherat: that shit hurted

 

dorythefish: how much time did u spend on vine exactly?

 

remitherat: too much now it’s a part of me

remitherat: but before it was taken down, it was a very nice place to go when i would feel overwhelmed with the whole… spidey stuff

remitherat: tiktok is a fine replacement but it’s just doesn’t have the VI(N)BE

 

dorythefish: gosh remus i hope u don’t quote it in irl

 

remitherat: shame on you i wake up every day and go “hi I’m REnata BliSS and I’M yOur FREesTYle DaNCE tEAcher”

 

dorythefish: can u dance like that tho

 

remitherat: well that’s the only way i can actually dance

remitherat: my body isn’t capable of moving to songs

 

dorythefish: OMG LMAO

dorythefish: btw r u ready for tomorrow?

 

remitherat: im super ready

remitherat: catch me lose sleep over my thoughts tonight

 

dorythefish: spider wth

dorythefish: didn’t know u were an anxious type

 

remitherat: hehe

 

dorythefish: have you considered… therapy?

 

remitherat: HEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHHEHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA😭😭😭😭😭😭

remitherat: i hate it here

 

dorythefish: it’s gonna be okay

 

remitherat: no i don’t think so

remitherat: it’s going to be a mess

 

dorythefish: well yes

 

remitherat: HEY

 

dorythefish: but it’s gonna be a good one

dorythefish: i’m sure ur friends will be fine

dorythefish: if not, i’ll drop them in the ocean

 

remitherat: that was my plan about ME you know

 

dorythefish: we can still try it out if u get in the water to save them

 

remitherat: okie

 

dorythefish: relax

dorythefish: listen to your favorite music and watch your favorite movie or smth

dorythefish: and just relax bc nothing is going to change between u 4 tomorrow

 

remitherat: will do

 

dorythefish: u won’t, will u?

 

remitherat: yep if i don’t show up tomorrow i am dead because of my anxiety

remitherat: BYE👋👋👋👋

 

TOMORROW, JULY 19TH

 

[Sirius & James]

8:47AM

 

killer queen: u ready?

 

lover boy: yes

 

killer queen: come out we don’t wanna be late

 

lover boy: uh

lover boy: no

 

killer queen: what

 

lover boy: i don’t feel so good

 

killer queen: james im about to open ur door with force if u don’t come out RN❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️

 

lover boy: UGH OKAY

 


 

The door was slightly pushed to reveal the person standing behind it, letting the smell of citrus – mostly the hint of blood orange – hit Sirius’ senses.

“Do I look okay?” James asked timidly, still holding onto the doorknob in case he had to change.

Sirius looked at him, making his eyes trace from the shoes to the hair, “You look great, buddy.” He said fondly. James relaxed his shoulders and let go of the doorknob. “I like when you wear this red shirt. It matches the black t-shirt behind it and also your very untidy hair.”

“Sirius Black and his interesting compliments. You look great, Prongs. He just doesn’t understand the concept of your incredible hair.” Peter showed up right behind Sirius, smiling in a comforting way. “You see, this one right here spent what? Two hours in the bathroom?” He bent two of his fingers for a more comical reason.

“Oi!” Sirius hit his hand. “Do not mock my perfection! I ought to look good today.” He then proceeded to the mirror, a desire to look outstanding needed to check his attire.

“For whom? Spider-Man?” Peter winked at James who stood still and decided not to interfere with whatever fight those two had going on.

“Shut your rich trap.” Sirius adjusted his leather jacket and glared at Peter with a look that could probably kill someone. James wondered: if Sirius had the superhero ability to do so, Peter(or Remus in numerous daily cases) would have already been dead by now; they’d always find a way to tickle the anger inside of him. Not that it was to make him mad, but for the laughs – Sirius had the best facial expressions in the group.

“Anyway,” James finally spoke and made his way to the door, “if we don’t want to be late, let’s take off.”

“Are you using my message against me? Such a backstabber, Prongs.” Sirius squinted as he turned to him.

“Love you too. Pete?”

“Yeah, let’s go.” Peter picked up the car keys from the hook and opened the entrance door. “I got the child safety seat just for you, Padfoot.”

Sirius huffed out of his irritation, “Why am I on the back?” The child seat joke was purposely ignored.

“Uh … Because I said so?” Peter rose his eyebrow at Sirius as if the answer to the question was completely obvious.

“That’s not a reasonable explanation!” Sirius debated as he pushed the button to call the elevator. “I want to be on the passenger seat!”

“Don’t make me get the pacifier too.” Peter added, pulling the phone out of his pocket. He started typing something way too fast with the fingers that revealed a few shiny golden rings. The decision to get only that color was indeed intentional because Peter knew that Sirius would make an attempt to steal one of those if they were either black or silver. For his collection, of course. A very questionable collection that was resting on each metacarpal.

“Jesus,” James rolled his eyes, “why does it always have to be me?” He whispered while closing their apartment.

The elevator ride was accompanied by bright laughs that in the past were known as a sign of troublemakers on the way. It was like a siren to teachers that alarmed to put every marker in the drawers or else it might end up being used in a new stellar prank – each as unpredictable as the previous ones and yet so magnificent with astonishing sighs from other pupils as feedback.

They sat in the car, white CUV with polished windows, recently bought from a fancy store in Manhattan because Peter got promoted and could afford to buy it with his own money. It was about time he did – he’d been working in that company for two years, the third anniversary coming right around the corner.

With Sirius on the back, James, as always, got the opportunity to be the DJ for the ride. The decision wasn’t long and soon first beats of Ed Sheeran’s I Don’t Care started blasting through the car’s speakers. Peter didn’t mind as long as he wasn’t bothered by others and Sirius had a feeling that this ride would be an agony to his pure rock ’n’ roll soul. Though wait, what about Taylor Swift?

         SIRIUS BLACK’S ROCK ’N’ ROLL RULES:

  1. Loving MCR is not emo, and he never had a phase.
  2. No one questions rule number 1, especially the Marauders.
  3. Ignore them if they ignore rule number 1.
  4. Taylor Swift is an exception.
  5. So are the other 20 artists under the genre “Pop” on his Spotify.
  6. But never mention them to anyone because you need to carry the rock ’n’ roll never dies vibe.
  7. Taylor Swift is an exception for rule number 6.

So, here’s that and, for clarification, Ed Sheeran was not on his Spotify(I See Fire is an exception. Why are there so many exceptions?). He leaned back to the seat and checked his phone for any new messages.

 

[EMO BAND]

8:59AM

 

mcmary: tony stark hates us because why would he arrange a meeting at 10am ffs

 

marls: im dead inside💀

 

sirius: glad to know i’m not the only night owl lol

 

james: because u stay up all night watching tv shows dude

james: for ur information he just hit me on the back of my car seat

 

lily: you’re already driving?

 

sirius: yeah, the ride is like 45-50 minutes and you can never guess the traffic in this goddamn city

 

james: LANGUAGE❗️

james: ST O P HITTING MEEEEEE

 

marls: cya

 

james: <3

 

“Can we at least get some coffee from Starbucks?” Sirius groaned after another yawning. “We have a long ride, and I didn’t get my morning coffee.”

James turned around to face him, hands gripping to the headrest, “Did you eat, honeybun?”

“No, sweetheart, I was doing my hair,” Sirius answered with no shame and full honesty. “So can we? Please, Pete? I’m craving for a cappuccino.”

“Please, Pete? He is craving for cappuccino and I want my matcha latte!” James jumped on the please-Pete train with a wide smile.

Peter looked at Sirius through the rear-view mirror and then at James like a mother who couldn’t bear having two children in her life, “Matcha, seriously?” He managed to point at Sirius who opened his mouth to speak. “Don’t you dare–”

In response, Sirius revealed the stud in his tongue, “Boo!”

“James, teach him manners, please. And get back in your seat or else we are not going to Starbucks.” Peter side-eyed James as he pulled the turning signal to the nearest drive-thru.

“Yes, Wormy!”

And now, with a sandwich in his left hand and a hot coffee in his right hand, Sirius finally felt at peace so even Shawn Mendes’ voice couldn’t bother him anymore, though he had to look up this one(in case of emergency, do not tell James). He gazed at the scenery and how New York City exposed itself in the morning; with many people on the streets at this busy hour, the sunshine laid on every window it could find to reflect the beauty of the city – high skyscrapers and trees that danced with the wind.

They were lucky to have a route that was leading them outside of the city. The traffic was ridiculous, so New York City-like but lovely at the same time. After spending the first five years of his life outside of the UK, where horses were seen as often as the residents, his young self was scared to find out that New York City was anything like that. It wasn’t calm and silent but rather loud and bustling. With time, Sirius grew to love it to the point where the word loud became a way to describe his character.

He exhaustedly looked to the left – the seat was empty, with only one dinosaur plushie resting like a passenger for this trip. In his head, he thought, ‘This doesn't seem right'. Sirius wanted to make Peter turn around when they were passing the last bits of NYC’s atmosphere and pick up a particular tall boy who had always been a part of their journey, his journey. This guy loved teasing him to the point where Sirius would start throwing pillows at him, loved watching the same movie on repeat and eating junk food when there was healthy food in the fridge, loved being a part of this team until one day his presence started to slowly fade away. Sirius wanted Remus to be sitting beside him, he would probably turn on Backstreet Boys to annoy Sirius or Queen to make him happy.

“Do you think we can ask Mr. Stark to let Moony see the Avengers Compound?” He suddenly asked the others; his thoughts were mixing with sadness that was growing inside of him.

“I’m sure he will let us. Have I told you that Remus got the position to present the new Stark Industries presentation that is happing in August?” James gave a sudden announcement as he skipped the next song. It’s like he always knew what was happening in Sirius’ head. Though, it wasn’t only in his. Peter and James felt it too – the absence of someone very important to the group.

“Are you kidding?!” Sirius almost dropped his sandwich because no, James hadn’t mentioned it. “The presentation?! Did he tell you?”

“Well, he sort of had to explain to me why he’s been so busy because I really wanted to know.” James twisted his hand. “I mean … I was worried. Like all of you.”

“Moony? Our Moony? The head of the presentation?” Sirius couldn’t believe it so he started to repeat it aloud. “Moony! The presenter!” And then it hit him. “Gosh, he is screwed. He hates crowds.”

“Yeah, he is freaking out.” James excitedly admitted, feeling proud of his friend. “But he’ll do okay. I’m sure. It’s Moony.”

“He will. And by the way, we’re here, guys.” Peter interjected as he stopped the car. “Look!”

As Sirius opened the door, he immediately leaped from the car, legs were shaking as well as hands. The building was enormous – multiple others compiled right beside it with a hanger where one of the jets was seen to be landing on. His heart rate rushed to the extend of no longer being able to stand, but, to Sirius’ luck, James grabbed his shoulder tightly and stood next to him, eyes observing the place that they would soon call a second home.

“I wonder for how many people can you throw a party here.” Reappearing behind them, Peter locked the car and placed a hand on Sirius’ other shoulder.

“Probably thousands, this place has no end to it.” Sirius finally spoke after being stunned. The suggestion didn’t seem surreal – even from the outside, the building seemed ginormous enough for the three of them. “It’s so big. Like a museum.”

“Don’t know about you, but I’m fine with big spaces.” James shrugged and took a few steps further, his eyes narrowed so he could look at the interior inside of the AC.

“Rich boy.” Sirius laughed.

“We all come from rich families, dear.” James backfired as he walked back to Sirius and Peter, his eyes lit from happiness.

“I wonder if it has a swimming pool.” Peter’s expression was far from the ones James and Sirius had – calmer and more resistant.

“Will we get to ride the jet?” James jumped on his feet when he noticed the hangar.

Sirius rose his hands, “I hope so!” He added, “The architecture is so well-done. I wonder who the designer was.”

To their surprise, a loud roar came out behind them. It made them all turn around anxiously – the sound was too much at this early hour. James opened his mouth and found Sirius mimic his expression. It was coming out from a red sportive car that was driving fast towards the entrance. When it stopped next to Peter’s, it revealed two girls exiting it.

The girl, who was wearing black sunglasses, tilted her head and smiled, “Hey, guys!”

The other that followed her went to give a hug to the nearest person – Sirius, “Oof … That was a long ride.” She said as she pulled away from him. “You must be Sirius, right?”

“I bet you recognized me by my perfection.” He smiled at her timidly.

“No. The leather jacket gave you away. You are the emo boy.” She then glanced at James. “And you are… James, probably?”

“How?” This was the only thing he could reply with.

“You look like a James.” She commented. “It’s a compliment if you’re worried.”

“Uh … Thank you?”

“Peter.” Peter managed to introduce himself before she took a guess and shook her hand.

“I’m Marlene and this is Mary.” She nodded towards the girl with glasses. “I thought we’d get here first.”

“Well … We did get out of our house earlier than we should have.” James prompted, making his way over to Mary. “Nice to meet you in person!”

“Huh? Yeah! Sorry, too sleepy to think.” She hugged him in response. “Glad to know you are fond of hugs.”

“We love hugs!” Sirius shouted, the smile on his face only went wider.

“Oh? Tactile people in the chat?” A voice suddenly appeared from the path that led to the hangar. “Dorcas.” They introduced themselves.

“My cave buddy!” Marlene came over to them. “I’m Marlene.” She gave them a hug.

“Ahem…” A woman, standing next to Dorcas, cleared her throat. “I’m Okoye. Pleased to meet all of you. We shall head inside if there are no people for you to wait.”

“Uh…” Sirius wanted to add something but was met with a very strict glance. “Yeah … Sure.” He said and turned to James who shrugged and mouthed ‘No idea what she’s about’.

The mechanics of the Avengers Compound were probably on another level, with F.R.I.D.A.Y greeting them at the front door and guiding to where they could find Colonel Rhodes. Sirius wouldn’t be surprised if an android showed up out of nowhere and offered a glass of water – there was Vision. Oh, he was. Sirius forgot he was dead.

“Hello everyone.” Colonel Rhodes, who was standing in the center of the lobby, greeted them. “Hi, Okoye.” He smiled at her and she silently nodded in response. “Welcome to the new Avengers Compound, although as we know, there are not many left on the team. This is why Tony arranged his long creation – a protocol that would be a backup for the Avengers in the future. So–”

His speech was interrupted by a yellow circle that started sparkling right where James was standing. He jumped out of fear(and unexpected to view magic after a while of not seeing it) and hid between Sirius and Peter who couldn’t look away from the shining.

A girl with ginger curls stepped outside of the circle, carrying luggage in her hands. As she relaxed her shoulders and looked at everyone else, James felt like his jaw just dropped to the floor.

“Hi! I’m Lily!” she smiled as she let go of her bags. “Nice to meet you!”

“She’s so beautiful.” James mouthed to Sirius. The other one rolled his eyes.

The circle wouldn’t disappear and soon after her a man in a red coat came out of it and greeted people, “Hello.”

“Hi, Stephen,” Rhodes responded, waving at him. “So,” he started counting all of them until he realized, “there’s one person missing.”

“Ugh, again. Tony is a bad influence.” Dr. Strange spoke and shook his head in irritation. “And I hate people who don’t get to places on time. Allow me.”

And so, without any actual permission, he started to open a portal carefully with his hands. A new yellow circle sparkled next to Rhodes, and, after a short while, a body went through it, slamming into the floor.

“Ugh,” he groaned painfully, “that was not a good landing.” He sat down on the floor and rubbed his head. “I was five minutes away from the place!” Spider-Man shouted slightly at Dr. Strange who only got more irritated.

“And yet, five minutes late.” Dr. Strange didn’t dare to help him stand so James and Sirius offered their hands.

“Thanks, guys.” He thanked, a smile hidden behind the mask. “And uh … Hey everyone.” Spider-Man greeted the rest with a nod. “Sorry, I’m late.”

Sirius, for no reason at all, couldn’t help but hold a smile on his face when he saw him. There was a familiar scent – dandelions and fresh grass that he associated with only one person who wasn’t even in the building. It even made him confused so he blinked the thought away.

There was a brief moment of uncomfortable silence, so Sirius spoke, “What are we waiting for?”

“For Spidey to remove his mask.” That answer came out from Dorcas who was standing with their arms crossed and a smirk on her face.

“Huh?” Spider-Man looked at them hesitantly. “I’m ugly.”

“Lies.” Dorcas squinted their eyes and added, “Do it. You promised.”

“You can’t do this to me.” He backed away when they started approaching him.

“You promised!”

“Uh … Okay! Okay!” He defended himself with held-out arms, jumped a few times on the spot, and then, out of nowhere, glanced towards the three guys who stood silent – Peter, James, and Sirius. “You can ask questions later, okay?”

The three of them eyed each other with a confused expression.

Spider-Man took a few breaths, a voice of the reason in his head ‘You can do it’  kept encouraging him like an oath. The armor suit started to slowly disappear – first were legs, then it was arms and body. The last piece that was resting on his face dissolved behind brown curls and revealed the face of the hero who tried to hide it as if he was afraid. He cautiously moved his head and looked at everyone.

The silence was broken by his voice, “Hi, I’m Remus. Nice to meet all of you.”

The next thing Sirius knew – there was question after question on his mind and every single one of them had no answers to provide. His lips twitched and then opened unintentionally. Hands treacherously shook underneath the shortness of his breath and the tightness of his chest – the world felt to be spinning too fast.

James was the first one to speak, but his voice went high and loud, “You bastard! All this time?!” He leaped up and almost ran towards Remus.

“Yeah, sorry.” Remus winced when James started to rumble up his hair. “I’m so sorry.”

Peter joined after James and went to hug him, “I kind of had a thought that you were Spider-Man.”

“Really?” Remus asked, not believing his words. “How so?”

“You saved Sirius from falling off the building last second and also the trip gave you away. Spider-Man appearing in Europe when you went there? In the same cities? Yeah, dude. That was easy.”

“Makes sense.” Remus’ laugh came out more relaxed and his body felt to lose the anxiety he was feeling all morning.

“You’re done?” Rhodes interrupted them. “All cute and stuff, but we’re not here for this.”

“Yes, sir.” The three of them shouted altogether.

“Then, let’s start.”

He proceeded to explain the principles of the place and how it operated. Everyone didn’t make a word, although James and Remus kept poking each other on the ribs.

“Wait. What. The. Fuck.” Sirius thought to himself while still looking at everyone else, trying to adjust to the news and the fact that his best friend – Remus Lupin – was Spider-Man all along.

He tried relaxing his shoulders so no one would bother him and decided to pay attention to Rhodes’ speech instead – his shaking hands were hidden in the pockets of jeans.

The dandelions only grew stronger on Sirius’ skin and the smell of fresh grass gave goosebumps every time he got closer to Remus.

And what he didn’t notice, while trying to shake off exhausting thoughts, were Remus’ eyes that would be attached to him until the end of the tour like a mark on the target.

Chapter Text

[EMO BAND]

11:04AM

 

james: listen people

james: I THINK I GOT LOST–

 

spider-man: and i thought to myself why it suddenly became this quiet

 

dorcas: remus

 

spider-man: o H A S e c

 

spider-man changed their name to remuslupus

 

remuslupus: okay now @james where tf are you

 

james: I HAVE LIKE

james: nO I D E A

 

lily: please tell me you’re at least in the building

 

marls: watch him saying he has no idea

 

james: i have no idea

 

marls: [mutters] i should become a prophet

 

peterpet: james. focus.

peterpet: when did u realize u were lost

 

james: when i saw a shiny cool thing and then i zoned out bc my mind decided that the shiny thing was more important than the entire world and then i came back to earth looked around and no u just the shiny thing

 

mcmary: what was the shiny thing though

 

james:

james: … a shiny mirror

 

peterpet: JAMES

 

marls: OMG FFS

 

dorcas: my jet lagging ass is laughing sm rn

 

lily: okay. what do we do?

 

remuslupus: rule number one

 

sirius: is that you gotta have fun🕺🏻🕺🏻🕺🏻🎊🎊🎊🎊

 

remuslupus: sirius it’s not the time for marina

 

sirius: excuse you, it’s always time for marina

 

remuslupus: JAMES GOT LOST

 

sirius: oh wait nvm i didn’t read the messages above

 

remuslupus: don’t worry, i didn’t expect you to learn how to read by 25

 

sirius: REMUS JOHN LUPIN IS SUCH AN ASSHOLE👺👺👺👺👺👺👺

 

james: JAMES

james: wait uh that’s my name

james: SIRIUS✨

 

sirius: HONEY✨

sirius: WHERE ARE YOU

 

james: I HAVE NO IDEA

 

remuslupus: WOW THIS IS SO HELPFUL!

 

james: REMUS JOHN LUPIN IS SUCH AN ASSHOLE x2

 

marls: colonel rhodes is looking at us and thinking why kids of this generation chat on the phone while standing right next to each other🤩🤩🤩🤩

 

mcmary: #itwasbetterwhentherewerenogadgets and have i told you how i used to get to school – ©probably him

 

lily: how CAN YOU ACTUALLY MISS THE ENTIRE POINT OF THIS DISSCUSSION??

lily: WE NEED TO FIND JAMES

 

marls: peter u morph into things yeah?

 

peterpet: … yeah

 

marls: do u have an ability to find people by their smell if u like transform into a dog

 

peterpet: that is so specific

 

marls: it’s just an idea idiot

 

peterpet: idk

peterpet: sirius has synesthesia maybe he can track him down with it

 

sirius: this is not how it works lmao

 

peterpet: ohhhh

 

mcmary: i like how we all ignored remus doing his zoomies after f.r.i.d.a.y told james’ location🏃🏼🏃🏼🏃🏼🏃🏼

 

remuslupus: did you just call my running a ZOOMIE???

remuslupus: am not a dog thanks🥺

 

dorcas: he is an arachnid

 

james: spider zoomies

 

lily: this sounds so cute omg

 

james changed remuslupus’ nickname to remizoomie

 

remizoomie: GASP

remizoomie: AFTER I FOUND YOUR ASS

 

dorcas: remizoomie omg

 

remizoomie: NOT YOU, CAS.

 

remizoomie changed james’ nickname to cantstopcryingtoglassanimals

 

cantstopcryingtoglassanimals: H U H❓❓❓❓

 

marls: omg please don’t tell me that u cry to heat waves

 

cantstopcryingtoglassanimals: i-

cantstopcryingtoglassanimals: certainly don’t.

 

marls: pathetic😪

 

remizoomie changed dorcas’ nickname to castiel

 

castiel: MY GUY WHAT THE FUCK.

 

remizoomie: better go and find your dean mwah

 

castiel: and queerbait my entire ass off?

castiel: nah

 

peterpet: im not saying that colonel rhodes is looking very annoyed but he is guys so…

 

lily: WRAP THIS SHIT UP

 

mcmary: wow.

 

remizoomie changed their nickname to remuslupus

castiel changed their nickname to dorcas

cantstopcryingtoglassanimals changed their nickname to iloveglassanimals

 

mcmary: gosh what did i sign up for

 

marls: i have no idea

marls: oh no im turning into james this is awful

 

iloveglassanimals: MWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *evil laughter*

 

marls: jesus christ

 

12:07PM

 

marls: i need to know who my neighbor is

 

peterpet: why

 

marls: they are blasting taylor swift

 

peterpet: oh, so here’s the list of probable candidates, rated from 1 to 10, where 1 – is the most likely to be them:

  1. lily
  2. sirius
  3. james
  4. dorcas
  5. mary

peterpet: okay i forgot that there are 8 of us. bad at math, not sorry

 

marls: i get that u r not on the list bc u don’t listen to taylor but @remuslupus???

 

remuslupus: what

 

marls: you don’t listen to THE queen taylor?

 

iloveglassanimals: he doesn’t listen to music at all

 

remuslupus: that’s bullshit

 

iloveglassanimals: yeah? name one music artist that you have more than 3 songs saved

 

remuslupus: coldplay

remuslupus: the cranberries

remuslupus: hozier

remuslupus: i literally have all hurts albums saved

remuslupus: and no, marlene, you can understand why i don’t listen to her

 

marls: i’ll let u pass bc i’ve never seen a hozier AND hurts fan in my life before

 

remuslupus: what can i say except

remuslupus: never give up it’s such a wonderful life~

remuslupus: gtg bye

 

12:10PM

 

marls: UPDATE

marls: my new neighbor turned out to be dorcas

 

dorcas: cave buddy we r so close to each other!!!

 

marls: this is very exciting!!!! we can like do sleepovers

 

peterpet: why. you live next to each other

 

marls: im sorry did i ask for an opinion from a genuinely boring person?

 

dorcas: #roasted

 

iloveglassanimals: i feel like at home bc im close to sirius <3

 

sirius: ilysm <3

 

iloveglassanimals: ilyt <3

 

sirius: u r the best bff <33

 

iloveglassanimals: no u <333

 

mcmary: huh

 

peterpet: get used to it

 

lily: well, i’m next to peter and mary

lily: also, remus appears to have a room right down the hallway

lily: fun, yeah?

 

mcmary: GUYS IM BORED what do we do now

 

lily: OH THANKS GOD IM NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO IS BORED


mcmary: I WANNA DO SMTH

 

peterpet: mr stark is coming over in an hour so i suggest unpacking the bags or take a nap lol

 

mcmary: boring

 

lily: but at least productive

 

mcmary: NAAAAAH

 

sirius: nap seems nice

sirius: gotta take my beauty sleep🥰🥰🥰🥰

sirius: b y e ~~~~✨✨✨✨

 

mcmary: bby im going to join u

 

sirius: mwah🖤🖤🖤 yes yes❗️❗️❗️

 

dorcas: WAIT WAIT WAIT an IDEA

dorcas: what if we throw a party tonight to get to know each other and just have fun lol

 

sirius: oh

 

mcmary: WHO SAID A PARTY? IM SO DOWN

 

iloveglassanimals: OMGGGG YES

 

marls: YAYAYAYAYYAYAYAAYYAYA LETS DO IT

 

lily: i suggest throwing it once we are done with all official secret crap

 

dorcas: so like 7-8pm?

 

lily: yup

 

marls: WOOOOHOOOO

 

[Remus & Tony Stark]

1:13PM

 

remus: no. way.

 

Tony Stark(the best): I can only assume that Rhodey showed you the workshop?

 

remus: yes, he did. ITS SO BIG.

 

Tony Stark(the best): I’m glad you liked it.

Tony Stark(the best): Happy’s told me a lot about how you are always creating things whenever you are at SI so maybe now you can contribute to the Legion with your skills and imagination.

 

remus: of course!

remus: rhodey gave me the assignment already. may i guess?

 

Tony Stark(the best): Go ahead.

 

remus: it was you, wasn’t it?

remus: the whole “Here’s the workshop and now you need to create suits for members who don’t have one and modify the ones that already exist”.

 

Tony Stark(the best): Thought it would be a great start for you. 7 suits for development. You don’t have to; I can assign specialists.

 

remus: NO! i’ll do it. you are right. it’d be a great start for me

remus: and it’s actually 8

 

Tony Stark(the best): You have something on your mind for a new suit?

 

remus: it’d be nice… i think at least. i want to come up with something cool

remus: something that screams “Oh Wow He is So Cool”

 

Tony Stark(the best): Hahahaha.

Tony Stark(the best): Never change, kid.

Tony Stark(the best): And come to the main lobby. I’m here.

 

remus: should i call the others?

 

Tony Stark(the best): Rhodey will.

 

remus: okay :) im coming

 

[Sirius & James]

1:16PM

 

lover boy: hey u awake?

 

killer queen: SADLY

killer queen: i couldn’t fall asleep so i unpacked some stuff

killer queen: like clothes and my suit

 

lover boy: OH CAN I SEE IT?

 

killer queen: ofc

killer queen: can i see yours?

 

lover boy: i don’t have one lol

 

killer queen: what

 

lover boy: it’s a long story

lover boy: i’ll tell it at the party

 

killer queen: sure :)

 

lover boy: honeybun, are you okay?🥺

 

killer queen: yeah, why?

 

lover boy: nothing

 

killer queen: say it already james

 

lover boy: no, it’s nothing

 

killer queen: is it?

 

lover boy: yeah, it’s nothing. can i come over? :>

 

killer queen: you don’t have to ask doofus

 

[EMO BAND]

1:20PM

 

lily: @all guys i hope you heard colonel rhodes’ announcement

 

marls: yeah, me & dorcas are on our way!

 

mcmary: pete, lily? where u at

 

lily: already on our way but we can stop and wait for you

 

mcmary: THNX IM COMING

 

peterpet: @sirius @iloveglassanimals @remuslupus marauders?

 

sirius: aye, omw with j

 

remuslupus: aye, already there

 

iloveglassanimals: AYE

 

dorcas: im not going to ask

 


THE LEGION INITIATIVE

PROJECT LEADER: Anthony E. Stark

PROJECT CONTRIBUTORS: Nick Fury, General Okoye, Colonel James R. Rhodes, Doctor Stephen Strange, Wong, Lady Sif

FORMER PROJECT CONTRIBUTORS: Natasha Romanoff

CANDIDATES: Remus Lupin, Sirius Black, James Potter, Peter Pettigrew, Dorcas Meadowes, Marlene McKinnon, Lily Evans, Mary Macdonald

BRIEF DESCRIPTION:

The Legion Initiative is a program created by ANTHONY STARK, a member of the Avengers, which main purpose is to bring together a group of skilled and talented people to replace OR support the Avengers team in case of an emergency.

LEVEL OF SECRECY:

LEVEL 10. HIGH.

The Legion must operate in full disguise and never reveal itself to the publicity.


 

[ THE LEGION: REPUTATION ERA]

3:38PM

 

Tony Stark: Thank you all for joining this team. From now on, things are going to change. I need all of you to share your daily schedule with F.R.I.D.A.Y, including future schedules(James and Remus, you know what I mean).

Tony Stark: In your new working tablets F.R.I.D.A.Y uploaded case files of every individual from this team. This is needed for you to analyze and then pick the leader. Yes, most decisions are up to you to make.

Tony Stark: Starting from tomorrow, each of you will receive an individual schedule with training programs and every single boring thing you can imagine of.

Tony Stark: Gosh, why does it have to be so dull and official?

Tony Stark: Okay, kids. What I’m trying to say is – you are going to be on your own as a team so work on the connection within it. I wish you good luck and if anything comes up, you can always count on Rhodey.

 

spider-man: he is not here

 

Tony Stark: Ugh.

 

Tony Stark added WARMACHINEROX to the group chat

 

Tony Stark: Now he is.

 

WARMACHINEROX: What is this, Tony?

 

Tony Stark: The Legion group chat.

 

WARMACHINEROX: I’m talking about my nickname.

 

Tony Stark: Oh yeah, wasn’t it your password back when I survived a terrorist’s attack and needed access to secret information?

 

WARMACHINEROX: You think you’re funny?

 

Tony Stark: No, Rhodey.

Tony Stark: I think I’m hilarious!

 

WARMACHINEROX: Anyways, it was nice meeting everyone. You all have a great potential, and you can count on me for help(literally on only me).

 

spider-man: … are you keeping the nickname?

 

WARMACHINEROX: Yes.

 

Tony Stark: Alright. Dismissed.

 

Tony Stark closed the group chat until further notice.

 

[EMO BAND]

7:15PM

 

lily: who got 10 liters of coke and h o w

 

marls: if i were u i wouldn’t have questioned my limits

marls: coke is the best drink in the world

 

mcmary: @remuslupus man did u get the pizza

 

remuslupus: YOU BET I DID

 

7:25PM

 

dorcas: i have a question

dorcas: why do we have bumpy ride (THE pitbull version) in queue

dorcas: and WHY IS IT QUEUED 5 TIMES IN A ROW????

 

remuslupus: oh my god.

 

sirius:

 

peterpet: ……………

 

remuslupus: @ALL TAKE ANYTHING THAT LOOKS LIKE A MICROPHONE AND HIDE IT. DON’T LET JAMES GET TO IT. SAVE YOURSELVES.

 

iloveglassanimals: I WANNA BOOM BANG BANG WITH YOUR BODY-O

 

marls: … im impressed


dorcas:
someone plz film this

 

mcmary: on it girl

 

[Tony Stark & Rhodey]

7:27PM

 

Rodeo: Holy crap, Tony. You should see what these kids are doing.

 

Stank: What?

 

Rodeo: Remus and James are dancing to Pitbull.

 

Stank: I’m begging you to film this.

 

Rodeo: Say thanks to F.R.I.D.A.Y later.

 

Stank: Thanks, ME, for creating THE masterpiece F.R.I.D.A.Y.

 

[EMO BAND]

7:27PM

 

marls: 3 out of 5 and he isn’t stopping WTF

 

lily: nO

lily: REMUS NOT REMUS RE MU S–

 

peterpet: always knew he had a thing for pitbull

 

sirius: i. love. them.


marls: SPIDEY IS A STICK BUG🐜🦟🐜🦟🐜🦟

marls: THE MOVES–

 

mcmary: omg those hips remus is FEELING THE BEAT HE IS BOOMING BANG BANGING💥💥💥🕺🏻🕺🏻🕺🏻

 

dorcas: i have no words

 

peterpet: wow really?

 

7:28PM

 

sirius: STOP CAS AND PETER FROM FIGHTING EACH OTHER JESUS

 

remuslupus: why can’t you do that

 

sirius: im off to take a dump

 

remuslupus: EW MAN I DIDN'T NEED TO KNOW THAT

remuslupus: YOU’RE DISGUISTING

 

sirius: you looooveeee meeee

 

remuslupus: nO NE v e r

 

7:45PM

 

peterpet: remus, it’s time for us to feel left out

peterpet: what are those lyrics jesus

peterpet: you look like my next mistake? CHEESY

peterpet: right, remus?

peterpet: ……………………

peterpet: WHAT A LIAR

peterpet: NOT JAMES SIRIUS AND REMUS DANCING TOGETHER TO TAYLOR SWIFT

peterpet: this chat seems like a dear diary type of thing now

peterpet: ……… dear diary, today I was betrayed by the marauders because they are all taylor swift fans

 

mcmary: jesus pete it’s not that deep lmao

mcmary: join us

 

peterpet: … only this time

 

9:37PM

 

remuslupus: wait guys where’s sirius?

 

iloveglassanimals: no idea honey

 

marls: where are you remus?

 

remuslupus: uh i went to look for him

 

dorcas: come back the drama queen was probably sleepy

 

lily: he told me he felt sick

 

remuslupus: when was that?

 

lily: when you leaped to the ceiling to show off your power. like 10 minutes ago

 

remuslupus: oh.

 

[Remus & James]

9:38PM

 

deer god: come back to the party, I’ll go check on him

 

moonshine: I can do it myself, prongs

 

deer god: I know, but I’m his brother and you need to relax. your whole body looked stressed out tonight

 

moonshine: I’m fine?

 

deer god: yeah, sure. go back. relax. I’ll take care of sirius

 

moonshine: keep me updated?

 

deer god: of course

 

10:15PM

 

deer god: he’s okay. just tired and overwhelmed

 

moonshine: from what?

 

deer god: no idea. maybe emotions? he was super happy today

 

moonshine: haha, yes.

moonshine: thank you, prongs

 

deer god: no problem :)

 

[Sirius & James]

10:16PM

 

lover boy: he texted me

 

killer queen: what did you tell him?

 

lover boy: nothing

lover boy: don’t worry, i won’t tell him what you’ve told me

 

killer queen: thank you

 

lover boy: but you should

lover boy: you should talk to him

 

killer queen: not today james

killer queen: i’m very tired

 

lover boy: wanna cuddle with your best friend slash brother then? <3

 

killer queen: i… actually would rather be alone rn

killer queen: sorry

 

lover boy: it’s fine! gn love💞💞💞

 

killer queen: goodnight

 

[Sirius & Remus]

10:29PM

 

donkey: hey. just wanted to check up on you

 

10:32PM

 

donkey: am stupid

donkey: you are probably asleep

donkey: goodnight pads!

donkey: it was lovely dancing with you to blank space tonight lmao

donkey: hope you feel better in the morning

donkey: okay i’m off

 

[Sirius & James]

10:33PM

 

killer queen: okay no i really need u rn

 

lover boy: aw :((( im coming!!!

Chapter Text

The next day was Saturday – a magical day of the week that indulged many people in partying for their lives or taking a break after long working shifts. For what it's worth, Sirius didn’t feel in need of those two – his head had been aching since yesterday and it kept bothering him like a woodpecker, banging on a trunk of a tree, trying to get that worm out and eat it.

It was bothering him to the point where his mind couldn’t think clearly and his hands were starting to shake faster than usual – the tremor, it seemed, was eager to win over his body as he felt lightheaded walking down the hall of the living quarters. He thought of fresh air and how it would benefit him. The warmth, coming in through the windows, burnt his pale skin that his t-shirt exposed and the awful feeling was growing stronger with every second he used in his life to hold it back. So, knowing how misbalanced his senses were, Sirius decided to get outside and not retrieve until he’d feel better.

The doors opened by themselves – it was funny how he pondered to open them with his hands when everything in this building could do so on its own. Yesterday he tried to turn on the shower(it looked like a regular shower, okay?) and it hit him with hot water so hard that Sirius had to jump out and take a few breaths.

This was the magical world of the Avengers Compound, the second day, and Sirius already wanted to go home where everything seemed normal. Well, not that it was normal – his friends, that he thought were normal, turned out to be exceptional, with James being a demigod(it still seemed surreal) and Peter being capable of morphing into Sirius’ identical copy – even the piercing was in the same place. What he meant was that at least the doors didn’t have a personal life and were made of a regular oak tree.

Sun hurt his fingers which didn’t like sunbathing – that was a bad idea, he admitted. It smelt like dandelions and fresh green grass – spring in the summer, he admitted. He didn’t know where to go to let this hurricane die down, he admitted. He was being paranoid over nothing because he wanted to run away to an isolated island until his nerves were calmed, he did not in fact admit it.

There was a moment of silence, with the wind rising too unnaturally for the weather in this time of year, and then, “Morning!”

A voice came out of nowhere, hitting him like a rock. Sirius felt the dawning success of getting back to Earth.

“Moony?” He asked the air, guessing, but not knowing where to search for its owner.

“No, it’s Mary Poppins. Here to be an awful babysitter and torture you.” Remus rose his hand. “I’m here!” He waved, letting Sirius find his whereabouts.

Sirius walked up to him, still feeling the nauseousness in his stomach, “Hey.” He greeted, looking down at Remus who was sitting in one of the outdoor chairs, one leg on another, and reading a freshly started book – the number of pages on the left side was smaller, compared to the other. “What are you reading?”

“Just college stuff, preparing for the new year,” Remus answered and carefully closed the book. He stretched himself, lifting his arms, “Nothing exciting. They don’t talk about dragons in Chemistry.” His relaxed face that simpered at Sirius matched today’s weather – so peaceful and beaming with an unpredictable heat as he reached to the table next to him, placing the book.

“Same Remus Lupin. Always locked and load.” Sirius chuckled and yawned – the result of barely sleeping through the night had caused his vision to slowly lose its focus on everything around him.

Remus shrugged, “You know me, I like it when I actually know what to say in class.”

“Nerd.”

“Bully.”

Remus wished his Spidey-Sense wouldn’t act out whenever they wanted but this case felt different. There was no danger coming, he knew that for sure, otherwise it would have ruined his morning routine, but the feeling wouldn’t stop bothering him. He tried to identify the meaning of it, so he traced his eyes upon the trembling hands that were hidden from the sight, but not from the sense.

“You okay, Sirius?” He asked softly, in purpose to not scare him away. “Lily told me you got sick yesterday and had to leave the party.”

“I hope I didn’t miss all the fun.” Sirius looked away, trying to evade the question.

“You took all the fun with you, Pads,” Remus smirked, reminiscing yesterday’s events and how loud and cheerful they partied. This was his first time in months, or maybe even years, “but it was fine. We ended up talking for a couple of hours and then everyone went to sleep.” Remus’ observation only grew stronger over Sirius’ body language; his eyes were focused on him. “You still didn’t answer the question,” he pointed out.

“I am fine,” Sirius grunted, not willing to look back at him.

“Sirius–”

“I am fine, Moony.” He repeated the words to stop this conversation from rising the anxiety. It felt to be reaching his heart which pounded harder and evidently in his ears. The corner of the mouth twitched as he let out a short, careful breath, “Just a rough night.”

“Okay.” Remus prolonged the vowels in an unbelieving tone. “Wanna talk?”

“No…” Sirius' eyes quivered. “I don’t.” He backed away, following to the exit. “I’m going inside.”

Remus got up on his feet quickly,

“Oh, no. Sorry, you are not. F.R.I.D.A.Y!”

Sirius turned around, frustrated and skeptical by Remus’ intentions, but then back to the transparent door of freedom. He tried to let himself inside, ignoring Remus’ presence that seemed to get closer, but it wouldn’t budge like it didn’t want him to escape(also, why would you have a knob on a door that could open by itself?).

“Are you serious?!” He glared at Remus who was standing a few feet away from him with his arms crossed.

“Yeah, always Sirius.” Remus teased but the other one wasn’t amused in any kind. “Let’s talk.” He coaxed.

“Let’s not. I’ll go around if I have to.” Fingers trembled faster as Sirius started to lose control over them, making him ball the sensation into fists and replacing anxiety with the increasing anger.

“Not if you can’t.”

“What do you mean by that?!” Sirius asked – the eerie confusion was met with a striking his back against the closed door. This did not make it easier for his escape plan to become one of the most successful in the history of escaping important conversations between two close people.

“Nothing at all, just this.” Remus whistled and moved his left hand towards Sirius, releasing his web from the web shooter.

It got Sirius’ left hand stuck to the pole he was standing close to, making it unable to move. He tried getting out of it, even used his power for once, but his mind was so dusted with the unneeded thoughts that it made the pole lift with him, as well as the sofa and the chairs that were residing there for the usage.

Remus’ perspective was a blast – Sirius was now floating above the ground with a few cushions and a pole. It was so nerve-racking and funny at the same time that it made him leave out a laugh.

“This is not funny, idiot!” Sirius snarled while trying to fix his mess.

“To you, maybe.” Remus had to cover his mouth until he could manage to stop the giggling.

Sirius got back to the ground, “Get me out of it!” He said heatedly, teeth clenched.

“After we talk, of course.”

“No.” Sirius shook his head, not willing to discuss whatever he had on his mind. This wasn’t easy – he didn’t like when things were unclear to him. It made talking about his feelings or whatever there was going on confusing and difficult.

Remus took a breath, “What is up with you?” He asked, looking at Sirius kindly – he hated whenever Remus did that. That expression would always get the truth out.

“I said I’m fine.” He looked down, giving up on his attempt to free his hand from the web.

“You can’t lie to me.” Remus reminded him as if it wasn’t obvious for the two of them.

“I am not.”

“You are.” He frowned.

“Am not.” Sirius repeated.

“You are.”

“Am– Oh God, I can’t stand you.” Sirius rolled his eyes.

Remus grinned, with the intent to mock, “Well, Pads, I have some news for you. It appears that you can’t literally stand on the ground.”

“Shut up.” He side-eyed him while adjusting his t-shirt – a good way to distract oneself from starting a fight.

“Nope. Talk to me.” He persuaded him into having the conversation.

“I don’t want to!” Sirius snapped, leading Remus’ anger to rise.

“Well, you will have to because I am not going to put up with your impulsive behavior!” Remus spun around, hands tightly grabbing his hair. “Why do you keep being so stubborn?!” He stopped.

“You don’t need to talk to me. It’s not that important.” Sirius breathed out, the feeling of anxiety started to take over him, making it almost hard for Sirius to keep his breath steady.

“I don’t, you’re right. But you are also very wrong. I just …” his fingers started fidgeting, intertwining like vines holding onto the wood, “… want to understand how you feel and help you.” He paused. “I’m your best friend, right? That’s what I should do because I care about you. This is what’s important.” As much as Sirius hated to admit it, his heart rate slowed down as he looked in Remus’ deep Vienna roast coffee eyes which darkened more and more as his smile began to slowly fade away.

“Okay.” His shoulders relaxed when Remus gave him a warm grin. “Let’s talk. How’s your day been so far?”

“Good. Have I done something to upset you?” Remus rushed to a conclusion; his head bent to the side.

“What?! No! Nothing.” The guilt of hearing the words rushed to his heart.

“Then what is it?” There was something that Remus couldn’t comprehend in his friend. And for a second, he thought if the years of them being less and less close, with the whole Spider-Man hiding identity plan for Sirius’ sake and safety, had resulted in Sirius’ loss of trust for him. “Please, Pads.” He begged for the last time as the wind grew stronger, messing with small curls in his hair.

Sirius ran his fingers through the back of his head, “I wish I knew, Moony,” he sighed, “I have no clue why I’m acting this way and it’s making me angry.”

“You seemed fine yesterday at the party, but then you ran away. Lily told me that it was after I showed off my powers.” Remus was again making the wrong conclusion – it was hard for Sirius to try looking at him without that twisting feeling in his stomach.

“Oh boy,” he took all his inner strength to find Remus’ eyes. “You think it’s your fault, don’t you?”

“Yes.” The answer came out to be short and simple.

“Listen, Moony. It’s not … It’s my mind’s doing and it’s definitely not because of you.” Sirius said modestly, trying to grow a smile on his lips to make Remus feel better.

“Have you thought of what may have caused it?” But Remus asked instead; his face was slowly becoming hazier for Sirius to read.

“Not really.”

“And why am I not surprised…” There was an eagerness to punch Remus in his teeth that drew slowly, but the realization that Sirius would never do that made it disappear right away. He did want to, on the other hand, hug him and make it easier. Considering their lives, making everything easier would be such a win.

“Hey!” He slightly shouted. “You wanted to talk! We’re talking!”

“It’s Spider-man, isn’t it?”

They both fell silent – the wind was taking over their numbed voices and howling like a wolf in his pack, prepared to bite.

“Moony–” He didn’t know if the other heard his faint call.

“You are mad because I didn’t tell you.”

“No. Yes. Maybe? No.” Sirius tangled between his mind and heart.

“You answered that question with all the ways you could, so I consider it as a yes.” Remus shrugged and took a few steps back – the distance he was building felt like a wall made of bricks.

“Christ, I hate this!” Sirius needed to do something – he needed to tear it down right now until it was finished. “Moony–”

Remus interrupted him, “I am sorry for not telling you or anybody from the Marauders about my secret identity.” The boy was saying his words so fast that Sirius couldn’t add anything, nor interrupt. “I am Spider-man and also the reason why you’re acting like this.” He came up to Sirius, his fingers gripping tightly to the ends of his black pullover.

“And now you are apologizing! Please, stop it, Moony! It’s not your fault!” Sirius snapped and grabbed Remus by the shoulder, making him wince, but then loosened it, realizing that this act was painful and cold. “Sorry.” He apologized.

“It’s okay.” Remus nodded, reassuring him that he was fine.

Sirius let go of his arm, “I’m … trying to figure out why I am mad but wanna know the truth? I have no fucking clue.” He stopped for a split second, gathering his trace of thoughts into coherent sentences. “I am not mad at you for not telling me. You wanted me to be safe like I wanted you to be safe because, let me remind you, I have superpowers too. It’s just … When I saw you leaping to the ceiling, I felt something in me that just resulted in this.”

“Pads...” Remus looked at him.

But Sirius continued, “Hell, I wish I knew the meaning of this,” he paused, “I think … it’s because I was both fascinated and … confused. It felt like I didn’t know you and yet I knew all of you at the same time.” Sirius closed his eyes to focus. “My best friend turned out to be one of the greatest superheroes and here he was — showing his talent. I managed to push the thoughts aside until you did that trick. I think … in that moment it hit me again. You know, the realization.” He then opened them again and found Remus’ expression to be the same as his – disorientated. “I couldn’t believe that two people I valued in my life turned to be one person and … I’m sorry I took it differently. James and Peter were so thrilled while I felt … sick. It wasn’t cool of me and I’m always cool, so I feel bad for that.”

After a very long pause, that felt to last for more than several minutes, Remus gently smiled and finally noted, “I … didn’t know it meant so much to you.”

“Well, now you do, don’t you? I’m just glad I could say it out loud without feeling embarrassed.”

They both let out a relieved laugh.

“Can I give you a hug?” Remus asked.

“Not until you get this web off me.” He stated, nodding towards the hand that was still stuck.

Remus blinked, “Oh, yeah, sorry!”

Overexcited, Remus did some magic over his hand(Sirius didn’t question it because it would make him think and he was already out of his energy for today) and got it out. The hand couldn’t move properly – it was numb, so Sirius rubbed it to at least make sure that it was alright. An imperceptible smirk grew on his lips when the fingers started to move.

He looked at Remus, “Remus, I–” but he wouldn’t let him finish.

Remus hugged him, his chest pressed against Sirius’ and arms wrapped around his neck. With all words being said, this conversation was over, and two boys were hugging like they did when Sirius, and other Marauders, met Remus at the gates at the airport back in June after the Mysterio accident had occurred. At that moment, it didn’t matter for Remus that he was Spider-Man and Sirius simply didn’t know. They were just glad to see each other alive and well. Remus knew – no, there was no trust broken – Sirius still hugged him the way he always did with his hands rubbing his back and fingers enthusiastically playing an enigmatic melody.

Sirius put his head on Remus’ shoulder and closed his silver eyes, finally feeling like he could control himself.

“This feels nice.” He said as the sense of dandelions and green grass grew stronger.

“Yeah. Very nice indeed.” Remus softened in his arms. “We’re good?”

“All’s good.” Remus buried his nose in Sirius’s hair. “Oi! Don’t mess with my hair!”

“It’s a lost cause anyway.” Remus grinned but regretted it right away – Sirius’ curl got in his mouth. “Ew!”

“Moony!” Sirius tried to get out and flick his earlobe.

Remus held him tighter. “Nope!”

They fell silent again – both hugging and not letting each other go. The silence wasn’t uncomfortable, quite the opposite actually; they didn’t think of what to say and didn’t need to do that at all.

Well, except… Sirius liked being the last to end conversations.

“I meant that.” He said it with full honesty and a weak smile that poked Remus’ cheek.

“I know you did.” Remus nodded while secretly trying to guess the song that Sirius was playing on his back. “And … if it makes you feel better, you are forgiven.”

Sirius sighed into his shoulder, “Thanks. Have you eaten yet?”

“Nope.”

“Wanna have breakfast together then?” He proposed, the image of freshly cooked bacon and hot black coffee seemed too tasty for his hunger.

“That’d be awesome.” Remus agreed and then added, “I value you too, you know.”

Sirius smirked, “What was that?”

“You heard me.” He pushed him a little. “Also, are you playing Young, Dumb & Broke? Read the atmosphere, idiot.”

“I will never understand how you do that,” Sirius muttered, mostly to himself, “And hey! That was rude!” He exclaimed theatrically to Remus’ face as he moved back a little to look at him.

“Piss off.”

“I can’t. You are holding me way too tight.”

Remus confirmed his words by pressing harder, making Sirius place his head on his shoulder again, “Okay, then… Piss off later.”

Sirius laughed in relief.

This day already seemed to be starting from a very nice place, considering how dreadful it was for Sirius to wake up in the morning and think that he wouldn’t talk to Remus at all for the rest of the day, but the universe or fate, if there was one, turned the tables around. Good. Something good happened when they talked – Sirius had a thought: maybe it was just a start. A start to making things right, to become close again, to forget the distance which had built throughout the years of them hiding their secrets.

He thought, maybe he deserved it. Maybe he deserved his best friend to be next to him again, to hug him, to talk to him, to admire his talents, to support his beginnings, and to help him with the future that was about to come.

He thought that James was being too loud, hey, they were having a moment.

Wait.

“James?!” Sirius blinked back to the present. “What the fuck are you doing?!”

Remus had to let go of him to turn around and observe the catastrophe that was going on in the backyard(was it even a backyard? What was even this place? A patio?). He opened his mouth to speak but found himself being too stunned.

“I … have a little problem here, pals!” James, who was wearing a tracksuit and probably had just returned from running a morning marathon, pointed at a small tornado beside him. “I can’t turn it off!”

“Is this why it’s been so windy today?!” Sirius had to come up to him and scream his words for James to hear. “How did you do that?!”

“No idea!” He shouted back. “And I don’t know how to turn it off!”

“Have you tried thinking about turning it off?!” The voice behind Sirius spoke – Remus was standing with his hands cupping his face.

“Uh … No, actually.” He shrugged. “Pads, take a few steps back, please.”

And so Sirius did and, in case it went wrong, he hid behind that very one sofa that minutes ago was floating because of his recklessness. Remus side-eyed him and laughed.

“What?!”

“A small boy is afraid of tornados?” He teased him, still laughing.

“I’m literally older than you, prick.” They were close enough for Sirius to lower his voice and make it sound irritated.

“Not mentally.”

“Don’t make me punch you.” He hissed, rolling his tongue out.

They both traced their eyes to James who stood with a facial expression of a scared boy, not knowing whether to take steps closer to the hazard he had created or to try stopping it from where he stood. Confused, he looked at them, and Sirius, being the big brother he was, fondly smiled and nodded, mouthing “You can do this”. James nodded in response and took a deep breath, closing his eyes as his arms pulled out towards the small tornado.

He moved his head directly to the ground, his legs strengthened to sustain his balance if the trick would have a powerful outcome. Breathe in, breathe out – twice, move to take a strong pose – twice.

Arms moved apart as he suddenly rose his head to concentrate. Then, he clasped his hands and pulled them to his chest which followed in the tornado rising faster for a moment, but then turning into a huge explosion, releasing the wind from the inside and hitting everything around it – from trees and their leaves to Remus whose body couldn’t withstand the flow and flew right into the door, slamming his back hard against it. The glass was proof enough to resist, only cracking on the edges, and Remus fell, banging his head against the floor.

Karma is a bitch, huh.

“Moony!” Sirius jolted from his shelter and kneeled beside him. He grabbed his shoulder and helped him turn around to make sure he was breathing. “Jesus Christ!”

“Oh my God.” There was a shock in James’ voice. “Did I kill him?!” He exclaimed as he rushed towards them.

Remus gave a thumbs-up, “I’m alright!” He lied. He was definitely not sure of this matter as the pain in him flamed like fire.

“Are you?” Sirius was concerned, already planning in his head a trip to Colonel Rhodes with the announcement that Spider-Man was knocked out by one of Hyle’s tricks. This was not something a supervisor would want to hear on the second day of work. “James, help me!” He commanded him and grabbed Remus by his shoulder – James followed his movements while still looking like a lost puppy with eyes full of regret. “On the count of three. One, two – three!” They lifted him, making Remus stand up.

The groan on Remus’ lips was followed by James' rumbling apologies, “I’m so, so sorry for almost killing you!”

“You did not almost kill me, Prongs.” Remus’ legs were yet shaking from the impact so he had to hold on to them tighter. “I had a huge alien blast shot to my face. Trust me, this is nothing compared to that.”

“Okay,” Sirius held out two fingers in front of him, “How many fingers do you see?”

“Two and I said I’m fine, but thanks for worrying about me.” His cocky smile made Sirius roll his eyes.

“Should we take you inside?” James suggested, not knowing what should be done in situations like this. “To like … A hospital wing or something?”

Remus brushed the idea off, “I doubt there’s one.” Once he felt his legs moving by his command, he let go of them and tested his balance. “Let’s have breakfast. James, you cook waffles as an apology and we can call it even.”

Sirius rose his eyebrow high, “Are you sure you can walk?”

“Yep.”

As Remus took a few steps further, his statement was proven wrong by the sound of his body falling to the floor. Again.

“Nope.” He gave up, grunting. “Little help?”

James and Sirius looked at each other and replied in unison, “Coming!”

 


 

After debating over the need to examine Remus’ state, the three found themselves in the kitchen. Remus’ pain had died down a little, but Sirius insisted on giving him a cold compress to lower the headache, and Remus, to be honest, was physically too weak to respond with a ‘no’. Or maybe he liked to be taken care of when usually he’d have to patch his wounds himself. When he was younger and his journey as Spider-Man had just begun, YouTube and special books were the sources to learn how to treat injuries and it wasn’t interesting knowledge. He’d say it was rather a distressing one. But there were no wounds, no marks, no serious(ignore that) damage – only huge migraine that could erupt in any moment given if not treated. And maybe pain in his back, but he’d been used to it. If someone was to count how many times he’d had to experience banging against anything with it, two hands wouldn’t be enough for it.

Remus occupied two bar stools, that had a soft and neat fabric and had a high possibility to be very expensive, considering how much Tony loved spending money on ridiculous things, with one leg on another and eyes shut. His mind was blurry, so he decided to stay quiet and listen to the chattering between James and Sirius who struggled to find ice even with F.R.I.D.A.Y’s help.

A short while after, someone came up to him, put a velvety cold fabric, that seemed to be a towel, and whispered, “That should be enough to make the pain go away.”

It wasn’t hard to guess who did it – a British accent gave them away, so Remus smirked, “Thank you, Pads.”

“And that’s why you, kids, should be afraid of tornados,” Remus nudged him. “Hey! I’m only telling the truth.”

“Blah-blah-blah. Boring. Now, go away, Sirius, I’m having a moment of relaxation.”

“And I’m not included in your SPA treatment?” James huffed as he heard Sirius’ fake disappointment.

“Only if you give me, honey, a massage and put cucumbers on my eyes.” It seemed his brain was functioning well – the firebacks were in play.

“I can make that happen!” James opened the fridge and showed a cucumber to Sirius – the SPA train was in motion.

“He took a cucumber and is now slicing it.” Sirius narrated James’ moves to Remus.

“I can hear that.” Remus just sighed. Well, he was the one to bring up this idea.

“Here.” The two perfectly cut circles were gently put on his eyes. “Enjoy Pads & Prongs SPA-salon.”

Remus moaned in relaxation, “Oh. I’m in Heaven. James, you are totally forgiven.”

“Amazing! Sirius, help me to mix the ingredients while I’m preparing the waffle iron.”

With the sound of a coffeemaker dripping the product for Sirius to soon consume, a person spoke in a surprised manner, “What is going on?”

James took a bite from previously used cucumber and waved, “Welcome to Pads & Rrongs SPA-salon, Pete!”

Peter stepped closer, his face deadpanned, “That is the most awful name for a brand that I’ve ever heard.”

“Okay, you don’t get the “Best Friends” discount.” Sirius pointed at him with a spatula from where he was standing – the drops of waffle mix got in James’ hair.

“Dude!”

“Sorry!” He tried getting it out only to make it worse – the mixture was now living and paying its taxes in James’ hair.

“Why does Remus look like you got him into joining a prank and it went really wrong?” Peter sat on the available bar stool and placed his laptop on the counter.

Remus finally opened his eyes, “Because James smashed me with a tornado.”

Peter yelped, “Huh?!”

“It was an accident.” James defended himself as he sprayed the waffle iron. “It’s incredible how this place has everything for waffles.” He murmured. James loved cooking.

Peter was still in slight shock, “Just … How?” He then realized. “And … Are you cooking the "I’m sorry” waffles?”

James nodded in response, “Yes, pal.” And proceeded to explain. “I created a small tornado accidentally and when I tried seizing it, it hit Remus.”

“Accidentally?!” Remus laughed at Peter’s reaction. Oh boy, it’s such a wonder how he was still a part of this group after all these years – he’d become so careful and responsible with a highly paid job, like a regular grown-up. “How hard?”

“Like a grown-up,” he thought and peeked at Sirius, “at least someone is. Did he just lick the spatula?”  No one would ever believe that Sirius was turning twenty-six in a matter of time.

“Really hard. See the crack on the door right there?” Sirius again pointed with the spatula, resembling a conductor in an orchestra, “That’s where Remus landed.”

Peter examined the damage from his seat, “Jesus fucking Christ. Can’t leave you for a second.”

They changed the topic and started discussing things that were unrelated to one another as if the real questions were prepared for when they’d sit to eat breakfast. Remus’ headache was gone and replaced with Sirius’ request to prepare the table. So he took the plates and cutlery to the dining room further from the kitchen – it was separated by a wall with art that Remus knew. The Great Wave off Kanagawa, Katsushika Hokusai – that was its name. He wondered if Tony wanted it there or it was a designer’s decision.

Shortly after, the table, giant and long which could fit at least fifteen people, was ready for the four – their places were right in the end, next to each other, although Remus did want to put Sirius far away from them for the laughs. As they sat down, Remus immediately went for a carafe, pouring his favorite fresh orange juice(the Marauders had a taste, they loved orange juice with pulp) and took a sip.

But the juice was all over Peter’s face when Sirius suddenly asked, “So … Spider-Man?”

“Remus, what the hell?!” Peter reached for a napkin.

Remus mumbled, “Sorry.” Oh boy, he was not ready for this conversation. But he had to play the game and he knew how to do it. “So … a demigod?” He nodded towards James whose waffle fell from the fork.

He blinked twice, not knowing what to say, and replied, “So … a guy who can morph into living creatures?”

Peter glared at James with a “you had to do it” look, but remained patient, only adding, “So, a gravity manipulator?” Which sounded way more confident than their attempts.

“Wait … You control gravity, Pads?” Yes, Remus, make this conversation centered around Sirius. He loved the attention. And himself. Was there any difference in those?

Sirius took his mug with coffee, “Uh … Yeah. I thought you knew.” That was too casual, even for him.

“I haven’t looked at your file yet and when we fought against Thanos’ army I couldn’t actually understand the concept of your power.”

He didn’t lie. Sirius’ … or he should say Aves’ power was mysterious(he hated that word), nothing he’d ever seen before. He remembered being in awe when he watched Aves fighting – lifting creatures like feathers and blasting with something similar to the power of Shuri’s gauntlets, except Aves didn’t have anything. Only his bare hands.

“And how is gravity cooler than being a demigod?” James interjected with a frown, his eyes tracing from Remus to Sirius and back.

“In many ways.” Remus cut his waffles with whipped cream on top. “You don’t understand what a person with gravity manipulation can do.”

“Should I?” James asked with no sincerity; physics was not his cup of tea.

“Probably not,” Peter answered instead of Remus, knowing for sure that James couldn’t and wouldn’t spend time to concentrate on something he wasn’t interested in.

“Imagine being with me in bed?” Sirius winked, his playfulness was showing. “The things that I could do…”

Remus huffed in annoyance, “And this proves to me why I think you’re still a virgin.”

“I am literally not?”

He wanted to add a word or two but was interrupted by Remus’ lecture, “Anyways, gravitation is a not fully discovered area, so his powers can be limitless.” He shrugged. “We don’t know for sure of what he can do.”

“Can you fly?” Peter turned to Sirius.

“I domt knom.” Sirius was chewing on the waffles. “Maymbe?”

“You don’t nyom?” Remus teased him.

He rubbed his mouth and said, “Fuck off.”

“Still … Remus, how long have you had this power?” Remus wanted to throw his knife at Peter for bringing it up.

But he had to remain unbothered, “I got it when I was sixteen.” The memories of the events came back and so there the nerves. “It was a field trip to some science lab. We were told to not touch anything, and, you know me, I had  to fuck up.” He didn’t mention that Flash and his homophobic insults were the reason why Remus ran away to a prohibited section. “I remember how something bit me and then I saw a spider. Guess it was radioactive.” Guess? Really? “I ended up with these superpowers and … after un-uncle Ben died, I-I just thought I needed to do something … When you can do the things that I can, but – but you don't, and then the bad things happen? They happen … well … because of you... If you know what I mean.” He realized that the whole narrative was told to waffles.

So he looked up and saw the six eyes meeting his with a respectful glance.

James put his palm on Remus’ and spoke up, “He would be proud of you.”

Remus smirked, “Thanks.”

“Guys, come on. You know what he needs right now!” James stood up. “Peter, Sirius.” They jumped from their seats and went around the table to where Remus was sitting.

Remus felt warmth as they embraced him from where they stood into a hug. His vision started to go blurry, tears rushing over a kaleidoscope of freckles, “I missed you guys so much.”

The rest of the Marauders responded, “We missed you too, Moony.”

 


 

[THE MARAUDERS(((REAL!!!)))]

11:29AM

 

moony: but we will talk about the rest of us later.

 

wormtail: sure

 

prongs: we swear lol

 

padfoot: are we going to talk about things i can do? ;)

 

moony: i think we got a virus in the chat

moony: can somebody delete him?

Chapter Text

[EMO BAND]

11:59AM

 

marl: good morning

 

sirius: its already noon

 

marls: one minute before noon so stfu it’s good morning

 

lily: did you just wake up?

 

marls: i thought it was obvious lol

marls: are all of you awake???? even the night owls???

 

mcmary: yes girl

 

peterpet: the boys are

 

sirius: can you be awake if you barely slept through the night in the first place?

 

lily: sirius???

 

sirius: im fine

 

peterpet: he’s trying his best to fight the urge to fall asleep

 

sirius: why is blue such a boring name for a color

 

iloveglassanimals: oh he’s reached THAT state

 

sirius: @remuslupus ayyyy

 

remuslupus: wtf why does it have to be me

 

sirius: answer the question you daft punk

 

remuslupus: why were you named after a constellation?

 

sirius: idk just becoz

sirius: people are stupiddd bc they wanna name shit weirdd

 

remuslupus: see? you just answered your question

remuslupus: it’s not that hard, just keep learning by reading :)

 

sirius: you fckn twat you kbow thar remus lupus

 

remuslupus: it’s lupin and what can i say except you’re welcome?~

 

marls: DID YOU EAT WITHOUT ME

 

dorcas: did we…?

 

lily: nope, we didn’t

lily: cas, mary & i grabbed nutrition bars and that’s it

 

remuslupus: i hope it wasn’t the QUEST bars they’re disgusting

 

lily: are they?(let me remind you i’m not from here)

 

sirius: fckn acful and tastles

 

mcmary: please somebody punch him to sleep i can’t look at these errors anymore

 

marls: i can punch him with something icy

 

iloveglassanimals: HEY

 

lily: NO PUNCHING PEOPLE GUYS

 

marls: you all r boring as hell

 

lily: no??? just responsible???

 

marls: JuSt rEspOnSibLe

 

iloveglassanimals: lily it’s so nice to see a responsible person like me!

 

remuslupus: lmao

 

[Remus & James]

12:03PM

 

moonshine: WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE BEING PUNCHED?

 

deer god: SHUT THE FUCK UP

 

moonshine: this is the country of freedom i can speak whenever i want

 

deer god: you can speak later but for now SHUT UP

 

moonshine: you owe me pancakes, james.

 

deer god: if it makes you shut up FINE

 

[EMO BAND]

12:04PM

 

lily: uh… didn’t you almost break the table yesterday?

 

iloveglassanimals: well… sometimes i become irresponsible

 

sirius: smtimez lmao

 

[Sirius & James]

12:04PM

 

killer queen: WTF MAN THT HURT

 

lover boy: SHUT UP PLEASE

 

killer queen: alriht i sleep

 

[EMO BAND]

12:05PM

 

marls: that didn’t answer the question of why we have so many plates in the sink

 

peterpet: we ate

peterpet: the boys

 

dorcas: why do you keep referring you all as ‘the boys’

dorcas: are we waiting for a boy band to debut soon?🤨

 

peterpet: AND HOW do you suppose i refer us?

 

dorcas: idk

dorcas: girls?

 

mcmary: idiots?

 

lily: by full names?

 

marls: traitors, for not cooking breakfast for us?

 

iloveglassanimals: sorry i didn’t think about that

 

marls: is there any guy in the group who is capable of at least some thinking?

 

mcmary: remus seems fine

 

remuslupus: thanks!

 

dorcas: lmao this guy kept his identity hidden from his best friends bc he was too scared to tell them even though he’d meet them anyway

 

mcmary: then no, there’s no one

 

remuslupus: oh fuCK I cAN’t BELievE yOu’VE DOne this

 

dorcas: STOP QUOTING VINES AND GROW UP

 

remuslupus: potayto potahto🙄

 

dorcas: YOU KNOW WHAT THAT’S IT

 

[NOT NAMED]

user dorcas created a group chat

dorcas added lily, mcmary, and marls to the group chat

dorcas changed the group chat name to NO BOYS ALLOWED

 

dorcas: IT’S THE SECOND DAY AND IM TIRED OF THEM

 

mcmary: OOPS LMAO

 

marls: they ate without us traitors ughhh

 

lily: you betrayed meeeee and I know that you'll never feel sooorryyyy

 

marls: oh olivia rodrigo!!!

 

mcmary: taste❗️

 

dorcas: that’s why we should stick together. at least we have a taste

 

lily: i still think you’re overdoing this

 

marls: they drank all the orange juice we had

marls: AND IT WAS WITH PULP???

 

lily: okay, i take it back

lily: this is a great gc, i love it and at least we have a TASTE

 

marls: where are you btw?

 

mcmary: shooting range

 

marls: preparing to kill somebody?

 

mcmary: unfortunately, no

mcmary: but i wanted to try the shooting range and get to know it so i can use it in the future

mcmary: it’s nice i like it

 

lily: oh then i bet you’d love the training room!

lily: that’s actually where dorcas & i are at rn

lily: it has everything and it’s super cool

lily: you can like… shoot the targets and stuff

 

mcmary: how is that different from the shooting range?

 

dorcas: the targets are AI moving projections!!!

 

mcmary: OH sweet!

 

marls: oh yeah mary loves those

 

lily: if you don’t mind me asking… how do you know each other?

 

marls: oh please it’s fine

marls: she tried to kill me

 

mcmary: yeah i did

 

lily: she tried a what now–

 

marls: i wasn’t supposed to be here

marls: you see, when S.H.I.E.L.D spots something dangerous to the society, they like to eliminate it

marls: and so, you can figure out where this is going

 

dorcas: mary was assigned to kill you?

 

marls: yep

 

mcmary: i’m not going to defend myself or anything. you get a mission = you must complete it

 

marls: were you happy that i was your mission? <3

 

mcmary: you were such a pain in the ass in the beginning🥰

 

dorcas: she was?

 

mcmary: yes indeed lol

mcmary: we played tom & jerry for about two months

mcmary: at some point, i was tracking her down in italy, spain, france, and even the uk

mcmary: she was so goddamn good

 

marls: may i remind you that i was also 15 in that moment hehe

 

mcmary: and i barely turned 20, it was a few months after the snap

mcmary: but when she was finally surrounded, idk. there was something in me that didn’t like what i saw

mcmary: she was just a girl like i was when i joined the new S.H.I.E.L.D but that’s a story for another day

mcmary: and we had a chat. she turned out to be super lovely and i wanted to help her any way i could

mcmary: so i talked to some people who were temporarily replacing fury & hill, and they agreed on sparing marls under one condition

 

marls: mary would have to train me to become one of them

 

lily: and you just said yes?

 

marls: you see

marls: when the options are either that or getting killed

marls: you don’t think twice lol

marls: i did want to run away at first

marls: but then i grew to love the time i shared with mary

marls: and decided to just… do whatever honestly

marls: i didn’t have anywhere to come back, no home to call

marls: and mary became like a sister to me

marls: which i never had

marls: … i suppose

 

dorcas: you suppose?

 

marls: should i?

 

mcmary: if you’re comfortable, then yeah

 

lily: ?

 

marls: i … don’t remember my past

marls: the name is not mine

marls: the info that mary & i found on this name tracks to a deceased person, her face was not identical to mine

 

dorcas: how did you get it? (if you’re not okay with sharing, don’t)

 

marls: i’m good!

marls: i woke up in a hospital somewhere in belgium with clothes and a name tag “marlene mckinnon” on it

marls: at first, despite having zero memories, i was just happy to know i had a name

marls: and i spoke only english so communicating with the doctors was a waste of time

marls: i know its origin is whether scottish or australian but idk if i’m that

marls: i know i speak with a mix of australian and british accent, but no idea if that’s the case

marls: and i hate it

marls: i hate not knowing who i am

marls: … or was

marls: and as soon as i caused a scene with my powers(which i didn’t know i had) in that small hospital in belguim people were after me

marls: so i ran for months with no knowledge of who i was

 

lily: have memories… come back to you?

 

marls: nope

marls: it’s like i never existed

 

dorcas: this is awful, truly awful, marls, i’m sorry

dorcas: but… you’re with us

dorcas: and we’re gonna try helping you remember your past

 

lily: they’re right!

lily: i know some spells that might help :)

 

marls: thank you

marls: thank you so much, you don’t know how much it means to me

 

lily: honestly, it’s no big deal!

 

dorcas: really!!!

 

mcmary: off-topic, but can we get something to eat?

 

lily: oh yes!

 

marls: come to the kitchen, i think i saw something that looked like pasta

 

dorcas: lily & i r on our way

 

mcmary: COMINGGGG

 

marls: tbh, i’m happy to be here

marls: despite the stupid men that we ended up with

 

lily: well, there’re no perfect places on earth

lily: and stupid men are not the worst case to end up with

 

mcmary: true lmao

 

dorcas: and at least we have some freedom and are not caged

 

marls: i second this ^^^

 

 

[Sirius & Remus]

2:13 PM

 

shrek: since i recently rewatched night at the museum here’s what i’m gonna do

 

donkey: something productive?

 

shrek: i renounce our friendship

 

donkey: crying shaking screaming throwing up

 

shrek changed their nickname to octavius

shrek changed donkey’s nickname to jebediah

 

jebediah: well that didn’t age well

jebediah: but now I’m the cooler one

 

octavius: … no???

octavius: IM LITERALLY OCTAVIUS🤨

 

jebediah: what do you have? an army? catapults?

jebediah: boring

jebediah: I HAVE A LASSO AND A HORSE

 

octavius: do you really wanna have a fight with me about who is cooler

 

jebediah: nope, I’m sorta busy

jebediah: but let’s agree that they’re a married couple

 

octavius: they created the soulmate au where couples find each other in every life for centuries

 

jebediah: they also created an enemies-to-lovers trope

 

octavius: why are we talking about this, we’re two adults

 

jebediah: not talking about this would be homophobic

jebediah: I’m gay so I confirm my words

jebediah: also good morning, how did it feel sleeping on the floor?

 

octavius: ? im in my room

 

jebediah: … oh yeah

jebediah: how did it feel waking up in your lovely new room and not on the floor? because my back HURTS from carrying you

 

octavius: stop whining, you held the entire ship with your hands

 

jebediah: a simple ‘thanks’ would be enough, you know

 

octavius: thanks, moony

octavius: but i hate this bed. it’s too comfortable

 

jebediah: isn’t it literally serving its purpose?

 

octavius: yeah but it’s just a lot

 

jebediah: you can try my mattress, it’s something between soft and hard rock

 

octavius: hard rock? can you do rock ‘n’ roll on it?😏😏😏😏

 

jebediah: see, when I see this and the name octavius next to it, I can’t take you seriously!

 

octavius: but im always sirius😎

 

jebediah: I’m going to ban your name to finally be free to use the word serious like a NORMAL human being

 

octavius: 🤪🤪🤪🤪

 

jebediah: are we striking the mattrass deal or will you have to suffer for the rest of your existence?

 

octavius: yes we are

 

jebediah: good

jebediah: I’ve heard the seller has a cute face ;)))

 

octavius:

octavius: you didn’t–

 

jebediah: I screenshotted it

jebediah: I can’t believe you tried flirting with SPIDER-MAN

 

octavius: I DIDN’T KNOW IT WAS YOU

 

jebediah: WELL I DID AND I’M LAUGHING SO MUCH RN

 

octavius: YOU ARE SUCH A WANKER

 

jebediah: here goes the british insults omg I’m so scared what’s he gonna do omg😱

 

octavius: REMUS FUCKING LUPIN.

 

jebediah: WOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

octavius: WHERE YOU AT IM GONNA FIGHT YOU

 

jebediah: you can postpone you ‘revenge’ for later

jebediah: I’m out

 

octavius: and where out is exactly

 

jebediah: in the dictionary

 

octavius: you–

 

jebediah: relax. I’m swinging through the streets of NYC

 

octavius: patrol?

 

jebediah: yep, saturdays are always wild with crimes

jebediah: like, can you chill, guys? it’s literally saturday. let people(me) relax

 

octavius: how are you texting me then?

 

jebediah: trust me, you learn how to

jebediah: and also karen’s auto voice translator

 

octavius: who’s karen?

 

jebediah: my AI that is in my suit

jebediah: she’s nice

 

octavius: you have your own AI???????

 

jebediah: perks of being tony stark’s protégé

jebediah: well, I did hack the baby monitor protocol to get the access to her

 

octavius: BABY MONITOR WHAT

 

jebediah: jesus remus think before saying stuff to some certain people

jebediah: I’m gonna regret that

 

octavius: omg remus you’re a baby!

 

jebediah: … dude FUCK OFF???

 

octavius: i’m SO using this to mock you

 

jebediah: FUCK YOU

 

octavius: try a more creative one baby

 

jebediah: SHUT UP

 

octavius: no, that’s not creative. james said that to me today

 

jebediah: you too???

 

octavius: wdym you too?

octavius: oh god you too??🧐

 

jebediah: we were in the same room idiot but

jebediah: LMAO

jebediah: you noticed it too, yeah?

 

octavius: the lily pinning?

 

jebediah: that’s an awful word, but yes

 

octavius: i did and it’s so hilarious

octavius: james becomes so cute when he gets a crush

 

jebediah: oh yeah, remember jessie?

 

octavius: remember how awful it went?

 

jebediah: UNFORTUNATELY

 

octavius: i hope he finds the love of his life

octavius: he is so nice he deserves it

 

jebediah: he is the nicest guy to exist!

 

octavius: agree!🥺

 

jebediah: btw, what are you up to rn?

 

octavius: just some work, have to finish this planning for the application

 

jebediah: to where?

 

octavius: this huge architecture company but no big deal

 

jebediah: I read it as a huge deal, pads

jebediah: aren’t you nervous? or excited?

 

octavius: meh

octavius: i don’t really wanna go for it, you know

octavius: i’m completely fine with what I have rn

octavius: i’m only doing this for james who told me to try

octavius: but i know i’m not gonna get it, and if i do, i will refuse because there are way more talented people than i am in this business

 

jebediah: no shit sherlock, you’re very good

jebediah: at least I see it as very good

 

octavius: thank you kindly wowowo

 

jebediah: james is right, you should try

 

octavius: yeah but i can’t because my room is lacking in a working table

 

jebediah: you can try working in the workshop?

 

octavius: oh yeah

octavius: i was thinking of actually going home and working there

octavius: but i’ll try your advice out, thanks

 

jebediah: np

jebediah: are you going home soon?

 

octavius: peter has his job, james has volunteering, so sunday evening

octavius: i need to discuss with colonel rhodes how we’re going to come back for training because peter can’t drive us forever

 

jebediah: why don’t you… move in temporarily to the AC?

 

octavius: i can talk with james about that but not with peter

octavius: and also… this place is nice but… home is home, you know?

 

jebediah: I do. or I don’t

jebediah: AC is my home

 

octavius: i thought you lived with aunt may?

 

jebediah: I moved out a while ago, couldn’t feel the ‘you’re a grown adult living with your aunt’ thing

 

octavius: that’s the worst lie i’ve ever heard

octavius: but i’m not gonna push it

 

jebediah: thanks

jebediah: what do you say if I bring Chinese food later for everyone?

jebediah: I wanna make up for not inviting others over for breakfast

 

octavius: send that to the gc but I’m down

 

[EMO BAND]

2:37PM

 

remuslupus: I asked sirius and he said to send the idea here

remuslupus: 8PM, Chinese food for everyone, living room, and maybe a movie?

 

marls: oh wow you didn’t forget about us this time

 

remuslupus: I’m actually trying to make up for it

 

lily: i’m down!

 

dorcas: hell yeah!

 

mcmary: i would love some Chinese noodles rn

 

iloveglassanimals: yessss!

 

peterpet: wouldn’t say no to that

 

remuslupus: good! then it’s settled

 

[THE LEGION: REPUTATION ERA]

8:33PM

 

frostbite: mr. stark this place is amazing

frostbite: I’ll make sure to live a 5-star review on yelp

 

Tony Stark: How did you open the chat without my permission?

 

WARMACHINEROX: LOL.

Chapter Text

[THE MARAUDERS(((REAL!!!)))]

8:00AM

 

prongs: @padfoot SIRIUS

 

wormtail: @padfoot

 

moony: @padfoot GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE OMG

 

3 missed group calls

 

[Sirius & Lily]

8:00AM

 

LiLy: SIRIUS PLEASE TELL ME YOU ARE NOT ASLEEP

 

5 missed calls from LiLy

 

[EMO BAND]

8:04AM

 

sirius: WHAT THE FUCK????

 

lily: oh my god you are alive

 

remuslupus: but you are also yet to die by the hands of colonel rhodes

 

sirius: WDYM

 

marls: boy you are so screwed

 

sirius: wHAT IS GOING ON WHY IS THERE AN ALARM IN MY ROOM

 

iloveglassanimals: WE HAVE A TRIAL TRAINING SESSION AND NEITHER YOU NOR MARY IS HERE

 

sirius: WAIT WHAT

 

peterpet: have you checked your schedule pads

 

sirius: NO…

 

remuslupus: alright I’m definitely not entrusting you with my kids

 

sirius: YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE THEM?????????????????

 

remuslupus: I’m talking about my dogs and cats in the future

 

sirius: WAIT NOOOOOOOOOO :(((

sirius: UGHHHHH CAN YOU STOP THE ALARM JESUS CHRIST

 

dorcas: yes but yOU BETTER COME DOWN HERE RN

 

remuslupus: marls is getting mary and you better run to the training room

 

sirius: TURN OFF THE ALARM IM COMING

sirius: AND WHY IS IT A THING IN THE FIRST PLACE???

 

iloveglassanimals: oh it was lily’s idea

 

lily: I had to wake you up

 

sirius: HUH??? NOT LIKE THIS??????/

 

lily: WELL WE TRIED CALLING YOU SIRIUS BUT YOU WERE ASLEEP … aaaand wait I have an idea how to get you down here fast

 

sirius: what idea

sirius: LILY????

sirius: wait WTF WHY is lily in my room

sirius: WHAT THE FU

 

mcmary: good morning people

 

8:10AM

 

dorcas: guys and girls i think colonel rhodes hates us

 

marls: why would he though🧐

 

remuslupus: yeah why would he

remuslupus: it’s not like there are only 5 people who showed up ready and in some gear, then marlene who got late because she had to get mary who is now standing with her wet hair and a towel, and sirius WHO IS LITERALLY IN HIS PJS???

 

mcmary: me (an empath) sensing that maybe there is a reason why he’d hate us

 

sirius: man life sucks guys

 

remuslupus: we don’t care sirius

 

sirius: man life sucks guys, remus lupin is not included

 

lily: stop looking at your phones he is nOT BLIND

 

8:12AM

 

iloveglassanimals: psss sirius

iloveglassanimals: pssssssss

 

sirius: what

 

iloveglassanimals: i really adore your pjs with star constellations💖

 

sirius: geez thanks mate

 

iloveglassanimals: it’s so cute it adds to your cuteness

 

sirius: …thanks mate?

 

iloveglassanimals: it’s also very ridiculous

 

sirius: HUH

sirius: JAMES?????

 

marls: you really sleep with those clothes on?

 

sirius: YES

sirius: IT’S NOT THAT DEEP

 

mcmary: i think that this pjs could be your superhero costume

 

dorcas: LMAO

 

iloveglassanimals: imagine you are an infamous villain who is waiting to face your enemy and suddenly you see a guy in pjs with a t-shirt that says ‘you like space? i can be your personal space;)’

 

sirius: ????????????????????? WHAT IS THIS? DID YOU CATCH A REMUSLUPUS VIRUS?

 

marls: just acknowledge your ridiculous pjs-outfit sirius and move on

 

sirius: NO BECAUSE WHY WOULD I

 

lily: PUT YOUR PHONES AWAY FFS

 

[Sirius & James]

8:13AM

 

lover boy: remus…

 

killer queen: yes.

 

lover boy: wow. just wow. wow wow wow wow wow.

 

killer queen: i’ve seen him fighting before but seeing it this close and knowing that it’s him in the suit-

 

lover boy: unbelievable and mesmerizing

 

killer queen: yes. yes, indeed, yes.

 

[Sirius & Lily]

8:13AM

 

LiLy: don’t forget to blink

 

SiRiUs: … oksie doksie?

 

LiLy: blink

 

SiRiUs: im trying my best. eyes don’t blink

 

LiLy: you control them btw

 

SiRiUs: i hate all of you

 

[EMO BAND]

8:15AM

 

marls: this guy is really good

 

remuslupus: aw thanks marls are you finally acknowledging me🥺

 

marls: i advice you to be careful tonight when you go to sleep.

 

mcmary: marlene.

 

marls: UGH okay

 

remuslupus: oh nO I missed my opportunity to make fun of sirius!

 

sirius: go cry about it

 

remuslupus: okay will do jimmy neutron

 

sirius: OI-

 

lily: JAMES CAN YOU STOP SIRIUS I SEE HIM APPROACHING ME AND REMUS

 

iloveglassanimals: on it

 

marls: dorcas is so amazing at fighting wow

 

mcmary: you saying what now?😜

 

marls: just facts?

 

remuslupus: that’s my friend and I love them

 

sirius: geez i wanna know how to handle a spear like that it looks cool

 

iloveglassanimals: super super super cool

 

8:20AM

 

dorcas: ay people thanks for the compliments </3

 

marls: u r welcome!!!

 

remuslupus: where’s peter

 

iloveglassanimals: his phone is with me, he doesn’t want to have it

iloveglassanimals: thinks he’s gonna get in trouble

 

remuslupus: him and trouble? lmao has he looked at sirius?

 

sirius: im literally online

 

remuslupus: nice to meet you, online. I’m remus

 

sirius: dad jokes? grow up

sirius: does he think that he’s gonna get a detention or smth lmao

 

iloveglassanimals: like we’re back at school lol

 

remuslupus: well, considering all pranks that we’d done, I wouldn’t be surprised by his decision

 

marls: you did pranks at school?

 

sirius: yeah we were very cool

 

marls: really? where’d it all go?

 

iloveglassanimals: OH LILY IS UP NEXT!

 

[Remus & James]

8:22AM

 

moonshine: stop drooling

 

deer god: i wasn’t

 

moonshine: gosh james you are so obvious

 

[Sirius & Remus]

8:22AM

 

octavius: he is so obvious

 

jebediah: yes he is lmao

 

octavius: im waiting for phase 2

 

jebediah: naaah it’s too early for that

 

octavius: okay im patiently waiting for phase 2

octavius: and also moony i must say you are incredible at fighting

 

jebediah: did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed or smth

 

octavius: no wtf im being honest and nice bc you did some cool tricks

octavius: I CAN BE A GOOD GUY U KNOW

 

jebediah: you are that side-character who thinks that they are mc

 

octavius: okay im gonna be a bitch from now on

 

jebediah: lmao yeah sure if that’s in your nature

 

octavius: IM TAKING THE SPEAR AND KILLING YOU

 

jebediah: side-character moment

 

octavius: you better watch out

 

jebediah: YOU better watch out

 

[EMO BAND]

8:26AM

 

mcmary: up next MARLEEEENEEEE

 

sirius: OKAY SHE STARTED WITH BASICALLY SLICING THE DUMMY IN HALF???

 

dorcas: omg she’s a queen

 

lily: we stan

 

iloveglassanimals: take a note to never make her mad

 

mcmary: oh yeah you don’t wanna do that buddy

 

8:31AM

 

marls: psss guys i have an idea

 

dorcas: what

 

lily: what

 

iloveglassanimals: what

 

sirius: wot

 

remuslupus: that meme is 5000 years old

 

dorcas: says the guy who quotes vines

 

remuslupus: now you see cas vine is not a meme it’s a religion

 

dorcas: yeah and im a bird

 

marls: hey you bitches HEAR ME OUT you better watch this

 

sirius: you kiss your mouth with that mom???

 

iloveglassanimals: sirius...

 

sirius: wot

sirius:

sirius: oh for fuck’s sake im done

 

remuslupus: days when sirius hasn’t shamed himself: zero cero lo zero lmao

 

sirius: days when i love remus: zéro. putain je te déteste

 

remuslupus: je te comprends. tu m'as appris le français

 

lily: why are you like this.

 

dorcas: LMAO LOOK AT MARY

 

lily: wait LOL

 

sirius: HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 

iloveglassanimals: now THIS is what i call fun

 

8:37AM

 

mcmary: IM GOING TO KILL YOU MARLENE

 

remuslupus: F

 

marls: oh hi mary! how was your trial training?

 

mcmary: HOW WAS IT???? YOU MADE MY HAIR FROZEN AND STARTED PULLING ME SIDEWAYS WITH IT SO I COULDN’T HIT THE TARGETS

 

marls: ooh really you think i did it? do you think im such a monster?

 

mcmary: honestly? OF COURSE GIRL

 

marls: awwwwwww

marls: YES I DID IT AND I FUCKING LOVED IT LMAOOOOOOOO

 

mcmary: you’re SO going to regret this

 

sirius: no she won’t

 

marls: no i won’t

marls: good to know that sirius understands me

 

sirius: i try not to.

 

lily: james you’re up

 

iloveglassanimals: uP DOwn funk you up🤩🤩🤩🤩

 

lily: it’s uptown funk you up and GO

 

sirius: bruno mars liked your comment

 

8:39AM

 

marls: what’s he trying to do

 

dorcas: uhhhh i think he’s running away from the targets?

 

sirius: i wish we could record him and upload it on tiktok

 

remuslupus: we should be respectful

 

peterpet: you literally just laughed at james’ attempt to jump on the dummy

 

remuslupus: hi pete and I’m not sorry for that HE TRIED TO SET IT ON FIRE BUT INSTEAD THE FLAMES REACHED HIS HANDS LMAO

 

mcmary: doesn’t he like… feel the pain?

 

peterpet: I think so

 

remuslupus: and now I feel bad for laughing

 

lily: he has zero skill

 

sirius: c’mon lily he’s trying his best

 

lily: i see it but he’d be dead on a battlefield

 

sirius: A BATTLEFIELD???

 

remuslupus: WHO is exaggerating stop exaggerating

 

dorcas: WAIT WOW

 

mcmary: coooooool

 

sirius: THAT’S MY BFF

 

dorcas: he mixed air and fire and made a fire tornado???

 

lily: okay but people–

 

marls: he can’t turn it off……………………

 

mcmary: … rip

 

dorcas: well…

 

remuslupus: shit I’m going in

 

8:43AM

 

lily: that went well

 

iloveglassanimals: omg no that was awful

 

lily: yes it was

 

marls: you know what’s more awful than this?

marls: BEING ASSIGNED TO TRAIN YOU

 

iloveglassanimals: IM SORRY OKAY?????

 

marls: you better be a fast learner james or you’re getting killed

 

iloveglassanimals: by whom

 

marls: my hands.

 

iloveglassanimals: OKAY i’ll try my best

iloveglassanimals: remus thank you for saving my ass

 

remuslupus: np, not the first time I’ve done it

 

dorcas: is this somehow connected to the pranks?

 

remuslupus: yep, james loved getting in trouble and asking me to save him

 

mcmary: wtf did u do in hs

 

remuslupus: too many things

 

iloveglassanimals: we’re basically legends

 

peterpet: sigh

 

lily: oh sirius is next!

 

[Remus & James]

8:45AM

 

moonshine: I have a question

 

deer god: shoot

 

moonshine: why does sirius fight so well?

 

deer god: wdym he’s just so cool

 

moonshine: I mean… it looks like he’s got a lot of experience

 

deer god: im pretty sure he does since he fought crime during the blip

 

moonshine: no no no I mean it looks like he was trained, he could use the four years to master his skills, but it’s just… how do I put it into words

moonshine: ig you wouldn’t notice but his fighting technique is not just punching and running

moonshine: he controls his powers and knows how to use them in a fight plus I heard marlene whisper to mary something about that him using a particular technique?

moonshine: do you know whether he was trained?

 

deer god: im not sure i can tell you this

deer god: has he told you his story? like how he got his powers?

 

moonshine: not yet, we haven’t hung out alone

 

deer god: then i can only tell you that you’ll have to wait to find out

 

moonshine: okay

 

deer god: and maybe advise you to prepare yourself for the talk

 

moonshine: why

moonshine: oh fuck rhodes and sirius are back

 

[EMO BAND]

8:48AM

 

lily: YOU DID AN AWESOME JOB SIRIUS

 

dorcas: gotta admit, u r good

 

remuslupus: yeah you did great

 

iloveglassanimals: I LOVE YOU BFF YOU ARE AMAZING

 

sirius: thanks guys!💞

 

[Sirius & Lily]

8:49AM

 

LiLy: sirius

LiLy: are you okay?

 

SiRiUs: yes lily

 

LiLy: i saw you looking at your hands at the end

LiLy: you looked… scared?

 

SiRiUs: im good lily

 

LiLy: i get it you don’t want to talk

LiLy: but you know you can count on me, okay?

 

SiRiUs: :)

SiRiUs: yeah thanks

SiRiUs: if anything, i’ll text you

 

LiLy: good ! you were great

 

SiRiUs: i know

SiRiUs: that’s why i looked scared [deleted]

 

[EMO BAND]

8:55AM

 

dorcas: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

dorcas: WHY ME WHY ME WHY ME WHY ME WHY ME WHY ME WHY ME WHY ME WHY ME WHY ME WHY ME

 

marls: im so sorry

 

mcmary: u didn’t deserve this

 

lily: this is awful

 

remuslupus: are they being mad bc rhodes assigned them to train peter?

 

mcmary: yup

 

marls: im not happy with my sTuDeNt either but at least it’s not the DULLEST person in the group

 

peterpet: HEY🤨

 

iloveglassanimals: don’t listen to her, you’re not that dull

 

peterpet: i mean i know

 

sirius: huh no you are dull as hell

 

iloveglassanimals: sirius–

 

remuslupus: i mean he can be sometimes

 

iloveglassanimals: remus–

iloveglassanimals: you are awful friends I’m sorry peter

iloveglassanimals: and I’m sorry(?) cas

 

dorcas: thanks james but ig it’s not the end of the world

 

marls: at least the end of the world seems fun

 

dorcas: no yeah i agree

 

peterpet:

 

iloveglassanimals: positive vibes pete positive vibes🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

 

mcmary: speaking of the end of the world

mcmary: im fucking hungry and will kill rhodes if he doesn’t call it a day RN

 

remuslupus: why’d you bring it up I wanna eat so much

 

lily: let’s have breakfast together!

 

marls: im down for any idea that includes food

 

iloveglassanimals: i can make pancakes

 

dorcas: then let’s hurry him up

 

[Remus & James]

10:20AM

 

moonshine: have you seen sirius? he didn’t show up for breakfast

 

deer god: yes

deer god: he told me he had some work to do

deer god: and that he wasn’t hungry

 

moonshine: that is so not like him, he always puts food first

 

deer god: no yeah I agree but maybe the deadline is near?

 

moonshine: maybe

 

deer god: he’s fine, remus. i’m sure. and you should stop overthinking dude

 

moonshine: I am not…?

moonshine: … did he just send a cat video in the chat–

 

deer god: OMGGGG CATSSS

 

[Remus & Lily]

10:22AM

 

remus: hi lily

 

lily: hi?

 

remus: I know we’ve had our differences and you don’t like me much but I need help

 

lily: jesus remus i don’t not like you. it’s all fun and jokes. you’re clearly the boldest person in the group out of all boys

 

remus: is that so?

 

lily: yeah, don’t tell sirius I said that

lily: so what’s happened?

 

remus: I know that you & sirius are friends. he seemed off to me after the training and didn’t show up for breakfast(and he loves food). I wanted to know if you know anything

 

lily: oh

lily: sorry, remus, i don’t. he tells me a lot of stuff but today he’s been…

 

remus: weird?

 

lily: distant

lily: we chatted but um I will keep this one private

lily: why don’t you talk to him?

 

remus: well I tried but he told me he was ‘busy’

 

lily: and why do you think that’s not the case?

 

remus: ummm how do I put this

remus: has he told you about us?

 

lily: you mean… the marauders crap?

 

remus: ouch but no. about him and I

 

lily: uhhhhh

lily: waIT

lily: ARE YOU DATING?

 

remus: WHAT???? NO???????????

remus: WHY–

remus: HOW-

remus: WHEN-

remus: WHYYY????

 

lily: i mean you look close

 

remus: YES BUT we are best friends

 

lily: i thought james was his bff?

 

remus: he is but what sirius and I share is something… different?

 

lily: OH

lily: like soulmates?

 

remus: ughhh I don’t like that word but if it simplifies stuff for you, then yeah

 

lily: so you think something is wrong because you just…?

 

remus: feel like something is wrong?

 

lily: okay fair enough

lily: listen, if I were you I’d wait for him to open up

lily: don’t push it if he’s not in his state of mind

 

remus: oh okay, thank you

 

lily: you are very welcome

lily: you seem like a sweet guy, remus.

lily: I’ll write your name down to the list of good guys but only with a pencil

 

remus: lol thanks lily

 

[Sirius & Remus]

12:54PM

 

octavius: hey come to the exit i wanna say bye

 

jebediah: hey sirius

jebediah: you finished working?

 

octavius: yes and im leaving

 

jebediah: wait you’re leaving? i thought you were leaving in the evening

 

octavius: for a few hours mate

octavius: james & i have to grab some stuff

 

jebediah: you’re moving in???

 

octavius: yessssssss !!!!!!!!

 

jebediah: OH

jebediah: seeing your face every day will be a torture

 

octavius: i know. im beautiful😔

 

jebediah: I mean it’s gonna be annoying

 

octavius: R E M U S

 

jebediah: S I R I U S :)

 

octavius: #rude

 

jebediah: are you staying for the rest of the summer?

 

octavius: yes!

octavius: colonel rhodes gave us a number for a … driver?

octavius: so james will still go to his volunteering and I will still go to meetings(if I get that one job lol)

 

jebediah: does peter know?

 

octavius: ofc. we had a chat about it actually

octavius: pete is not staying. he has work, as i expected

octavius: and also he’s been looking at new apartments on zillow i saw his phone screen

octavius: so ig it’s the end of the era

 

jebediah: it’s not the end of the era. you’re just being a drama queen

 

octavius: .-.

 

jebediah: are you stuck in 2011 or smth?

jebediah: and try not to use the ‘you quote vibe’ excuse

jebediah: it’s outdated

 

octavius: you are outdated

 

jebediah: you love me

 

octavius: no i don’t

 

jebediah: was it hard to convince james though?

 

octavius: lmao no he started jumping and got too excited

octavius: like HE WAS REEEEAAALLY EXCITED

octavius: i’d say he was very overwhelmed i had to give him some water

 

jebediah: sounds like him

jebediah: quick off-topic question: is he taking his meds?

 

octavius: yeah but he’s thinking of changing them bc it makes him dizzy

 

jebediah: got it

jebediah: and is peter driving you?

 

octavius: umm no it would be ME

octavius: he didn’t want to give me his car at first but then gave up

octavius: im driving us to the apt and back

 

jebediah: the drivers better watch out for danger on the road

 

octavius: you didn’t pass your driving test after the 5th attempt so stfu

 

jebediah: … fair enough

 

octavius: im still waiting for you

 

jebediah: I’m coming!!!

 

octavius: HURRY UP old man

 

jebediah: says you who is turning 30 in 4 years

 

octavius: ………… WHY GOD WHY WE HAD A DEAL LET THE OTHERS GROW OLD NOT ME

 

[Remus & James]

12:56PM

 

deer god: SIRIUS IS HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS WTH

 

moonshine: IM COMING

 

deer god: HE’S ON THE FLOOR

 

moonshine: IM RUNNING

 

deer god: WTH DID YOU DO REMUS MOONY JOHN LUPIN