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What do I call you now?

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Baekhyun let out a frustrated sigh. 

 

“What’s wrong Baek?” 

 

Baekhyun turned to the side, facing his best friendㅡKim Jonginㅡwhom he had known since diapers. 

 

“Nothing,” Baekhyun replied, however, Jongin moved closer to him. 

 

“Tell me.”

 

“You remember the gifts I kept receiving anonymously?” Baekhyun asked.

 

“Yeah, isn’t that from your secret admirer?” 

 

Baekhyun nodded eagerly. 

 

“What about it?” 

 

“It’s coming back again!” Baekhyun exclaimed frustratedly. 

 

“Is it such a bad thing to receive it?” Jongin raised his eyebrow, before changing his posture and letting his right hand support his face. 

 

Baekhyun blew out a heavy sigh. “It’s not that bad actually. It feels great actually to know someone out there likes me.”

 

“But?” 

 

“I kept wondering why they never bothered to show themselves in front of me,” Baekhyun confessed rather in a disappointed tone. 

 

Jongin shook his head in amusement. “Baek, they’re secret admirers for a reason. The obvious reason they didn’t dare to show up in front of you is that they didn’t want to be rejected,” Jongin explained, meanwhile, Baekhyun glared at his best friend and scrunched his nose in annoyance. 

 

“Still, the fact that every time I was in a relationship, the gifts stop coming altogether. Not that I’m that eager to receive the gifts.”

 

When Baekhyun locked eyes with Jongin, his best friend let out an awkward chuckle, not exactly buying his excuses. 

 

“God, Jongin, I'm not that desperate!” Baekhyun huffed, rolling his eyes. “On the contrary, why do they never take the chance to confess and be bold for once when I’m single?” His shoulders slumped at the thought of his secret admirer whom he had no idea what they looked like. 

 

Suddenly an idea appeared in his mind. “I’m going to catch my secret admirer,” Baekhyun said, and Jongin’s eyes widened. 

 

“What for?” 

 

“So, I could know who my admirer is! You’re joining, Jongin?” Baekhyun asked excitedly. It didn’t go unnoticed to Baekhyun when he saw the changed expression on Jongin’s face. 

 

“Uh...I think not. I have other plans actually.”

 

“Is there anything bothering you?” Baekhyun asked concernedly. 

 

“Huh? N-Nothing,” Jongin stammered and immediately stood up from his seat. “I’m gonna get going first okay? I have someone to meet later.” Before Baekhyun could reply, Jongin disappeared in the midst of the people. 






It all started when Baekhyun was in sophomore year. He became known to everyone in the university overnight because of the debate competition he won by beating the long-standing winner that has been champion for years. Then came an unexpected small teddy bear placed at his locker with a small note attached to it “ Congratulations! I’m really proud of you :)”

 

He thought it was a one-time thing. Surprisingly, the gift kept coming twelve days before Christmas happened and it has continued for as long as he remembered. He lost count of how many times he had received the teddy bears. 

 

To Baekhyun it felt like he received a birthday gift. Every note he received never failed to make his day. When Baekhyun got into a relationship, the gift no longer came. Somehow it made Baekhyun feel a bit empty and he realized he shouldn’t be greedy either when he was with someone he likes.

 

Nonetheless, this time he wouldn’t waste his time any longer. Baekhyun decided to catch his admirer by going out at dawn and hiding somewhere close to his locker. 

 

It has been somewhat an hour and a half, Baekhyun has started to feel the cold creeping at the back of his bones. Somehow he felt regret going out way too early and now his teeth were chattering. In the end his plan to catch failed miserably.




“What’s with the long face, Baek?” 

 

Baekhyun huffed, crossing his arms across his chest. “The secret admirer didn’t appear at all. It’s like they know I’m coming after them!” 

 

“I think you should give it up, Baek.” 

 

“Why would I?” 

 

What if your secret admirer is Santa Claus?” Jongin jokes. 

 

“Ha, very funny indeed. Then I am Santa Claus’s favorite child because I keep receiving early gifts."

 

"Why are you insisting on catching them?" Jongin asked curiously. "Do you perhaps like them?"

 

"I'm not sure about that Jongin. I don't want to make it feel like I'm desperate for a new relationship just because I ended my relationship with my ex-boyfriend last week." Baekhyun explained. "But, I would like to know who they are."





Baekhyun's class finally ended and he headed straight to Jongin's class, waiting outside of the classroom. 

 

Suddenly, there were indistinct voices that somehow caught Baekhyun's interest. He couldn't help but place his ears closer to the door.

 

The voice was too familiar to him and it was none other than Jongin's.

 

"Jongin, when are you planning to introduce your boyfriend to me?" 

 

Since when did Jongin keep a secret from him? 

 

"What boyfriend?" It was Jongin's voice. "We never made it official and I never properly confessed to him." The voice became closer in Baekhyun's distance. Before he knew it, the door was opened, revealing Jongin's surprised face. 



"So you have a boyfriend and didn't bother to tell me?" Baekhyun broke the silence.

 

Jongin sighed. "Baek, it's not like that."

 

"I thought we're friends?" 

 

"Yes, we're." 

 

"Who is your boyfriend?" Baekhyun urged.

 

"I don't have one. It's just a one-sided crush. He never knows about my feelings."

 

"Why not? You're good-looking. I'm sure he likes you too if you ever confess," Jongin stopped in his tracks, turned, and faced Baekhyun. 

 

"Then do you like me?"

 

Baekhyun raised his eyebrows. "Of course I like you. You're my best friend."

 

"If I tell you that I'm the secret admirer you have been looking for, will you believe it?" 

 

"What?" Baekhyun gasped. It was quiet for a moment. “I-I mean, why you never told me before?” 

 

“Because I don’t want to ruin our friendship,” Jongin confessed, a weak smile formed. 

 

Baekhyun was too dumbfounded to react and before he knew it, Jongin has walked away from him.