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Published:
2015-03-09
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2015-03-15
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2/2
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Drink Me Under

Summary:

It doesn't happen often, but even Grisia can get drunk. Lesus is not amused.

Chapter Text

Ever since the fiasco with Roland being summoned back to life as a death knight, Sun no longer had undead creatures summoned for him to release stress. Although that should have been relieving to hear, it wasn't. It only meant that we had a restless Sun Knight on our hands, and that was never a good sign.

Now, he had to find other ways to relieve stress.

Storm, although always busy, had even heavier bags than usual under his eyes, no doubt thanks to Sun. Blaze had almost gone crazy when he found that all the doors to his platoon members' quarters had disappeared, leading to indignant complaints from his blaze knights, but most of all, the rest of the Holy Temple was now subjected to Blaze's foot even more than before now that he was several doors short of his usual routine. Cloud was hiding in the Judge's Complex of all places. I'd nearly had a heart attack when he emerged from the closet I kept my interrogation tools. It amazed me that Sun had even been able to find him. Leaf was once again gathering long, golden hairs...

When I sought Earth out, having little luck finding Sun with the others, Earth's only response had been to snicker. "Good thing I never joined the 'Do a small favor club'!"

He continued mumbling how he'd rather have his door busted open each time than to suffer some other fate.

As I was not Earth's leader, I did not berate him, but I did give him a stern look. Sun always described it as an expression that looked like I could squish a mosquito to death just with the furrows between my eyebrows. I tried to relax my expression, but it was pretty much a reflex.

"Have you seen Sun?" I asked Earth, brushing aside his comment.

Earth shrugged. "Nope. But I bet he's slacking off again."

I could not refute him.

By the time I had to leave for my patrol, I still had not found Sun. I could only hope that he would not cause too much more mischief while I was away. Peaceful times had graced us once again, yet that no doubt contributed to Sun's unrest.


It was while I was patrolling that my platoon and I passed by a rowdy building, and I was able to momentarily forget about Sun. The large crowd was eye-catching.

"Captain Judgment?" Vidar asked when I stopped.

"What's the occasion?" I asked.

Vidar did not know either, but one of the other judgment knights did know. He explained, "There's a drinking contest today."

I frowned. While a drinking contest wasn't against the law, the crowds such activities attracted always got into brawls easily. Without further thought, I headed toward the building, and my platoon followed after me.

The closer we got, the louder the cheers became and the thicker the stench of alcohol. I breathed out, having never been overly fond of alcohol and the lost of inhibition it brought about. My teacher had always forbidden me from partaking in unnecessary liquor, stating that the Judgment Knight must always have a clear mind. Only then could we judge impartially and righteously.

This decree of my teacher's had never been difficult for me to follow. After all, it made a lot of sense to me, and in any case, I did not wish to lose control. Then, when I discovered how my teacher had been affected by his father's drinking problem, I swore I would never give my teacher any reason to worry about me and alcohol.

Even so, there wasn't much we could do about the other Twelve Holy Knights and how much they indulged. Going out for drinks was a common pastime among the holy knights. Grisia was also quite fond of drinking. He even had his own wine cellar. While I frowned whenever he drank too much, it was true that he rarely ever got tipsy. His teacher had seen to that. Now, it was hard to tell just how much Grisia would have to drink to truly become drunk.

I silently observed the crowd before us, who had yet to notice our arrival. They all had their backs facing us and their eyes trained on the contestants. Many were loudly cheering, fists pumping the air. Beyond the crowd were several tables and barrels of liquor. Empty bottles and mugs littered the surface. Most of the contestants already had their faces planted against the table. Only a few of the contestants still appeared sober.

"That w-was satursfying!" One of the remaining contestants smashed his bottle on the table, his speech slurred. I doubted he would last much longer. "C-Can you beat that, lad?"

In response, his dark-haired opponent silently grabbed another bottle, downing the liquor to the hoots and catcalls of the crowd.

"How many drunk-in-ones has that been?" someone exclaimed. They pointed and gestured at the empty bottles, no doubt trying to count all of the empty bottles by each contestants' side.

While the crowd was quite intense, the situation was much calmer than I had anticipated. I turned, about to leave. An appearance by my platoon was enough to squash most thoughts of mischief and mayhem, so we did not have to linger. Off to the side, someone who looked to be one of the organizers was even rushing our way and wiping sweat off his forehead.

I merely gave him a leveled stare, face emotionless as I instructed him to keep things under control, or else a visit to the Judge's Complex would be in order. He nodded feverishly.

Just as I was about to leave, the crowd cheered even louder than before. I found myself glancing back just in time to see the dark-haired contestant down yet another drunk-in-one. Then, slender fingers pushed the empty bottle against his growing collection with a resounding "clink."

My gaze lingered, a foreboding feeling growing inside of me. I swept my eyes across the dark-haired contestant. While the man's figure was mostly hidden by his cloak, the way he held himself was familiar. In addition to his long-dark hair that trailed past his waist, and the fact that there existed a brooch that allowed for easy disguising...

"Hah, try to beat t-that!" the dark-haired man crowed smugly.

"Hah, Earth never saw it coming!"

It was the exact same tone he used whenever he gained the upper hand. I thought of it as his "I told you so" voice.

"Captain Judgment?" one of my holy knights asked.

I collected myself and tried to squash my disbelief. Right. I was currently patrolling. I couldn't let myself sigh or groan.

Instead, I glowered. Even my platoon members took a step back.

Sun, just what in the world were you thinking?!

He probably hadn't been thinking at all. I watched, not at all amused, as his current opponent slumped over, and a new opponent took his place, claiming he would dethrone the current champion once and for all.

The dark-haired contestant... no, Grisia, laughed and tilted the bottle before him around. It seemed very possible that I might witness Grisia's limits for alcohol this very night.

I stepped forward.

Well, he really left me no choice.

Chapter 2

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Ow...

Who's stabbing me? Do they have a death wish?! Ugh, my head hurts...

I cringed, eyes shooting open only to be greeted by darkness. A throbbing pain in my head annoyingly cried for my attention. It really felt like someone was stabbing me with how much it hurt. My hands involuntarily rose up to knead at my poor head--

Clink.

Wait. What.

Cool, hard metal chafed my wrists. When I pulled harder, another clink sounded as something -- a chain? -- clattered to the floor.

I'm freakin' chained to the wall! Lesus is going to kill me when he finds out I got kidnapped again...

I let my sensing ability burst out, only to regret it when the throbbing pain grew to a killer pain. I wasn't getting stabbed anymore. It was more like I was getting skewered now. But through my wincing, I was finally able to get a grip on the situation.

Like I had thought, I was chained to the wall. What I didn't expect was for the room to look so familiar, or for my captor to be in the very same room... correcting documents.

The clatter of chains must have alerted him to my state of consciousness. He nonchalantly glanced up, as if nothing was wrong, and said, "I see you've woken up."

"Did I lose control again?" I asked, icy fear chilling me. It was the only conclusion I could think of for him to chain me up. Trying to gather elements revealed that my magic was partially sealed but not completely out of reach.

He made a noncommittal noise and turned his attention back to the papers in his hands.

"Lesus!" I demanded. Are those papers more interesting than me?! He's clearly ignoring me!

He paused for a moment, eventually saying, "No, you didn't lose control. Not in that way."

His heartbeat remained calm; he wasn't lying. The fear melted away. Oh, good. But that didn't explain why I was chained to the wall in one of the interrogation rooms of the Judge's Complex, or why Lesus was ignoring me.

What does he mean by "not in that way" anyway?

I pulled at my chains.

My captor is freakin' Lesus Judgment.

While he'd tossed me in confinement more than once, he'd never chained me up in the Judge's Complex before!

My head hurts way too much for this.

Lesus finished writing whatever was taking up so much of his attention, stacked his papers neatly, and stood up. I winced when the chair scraped across the stone floor, the noise way too sharp. He slowly walked towards me, his manner much too imposing, his expression tightly drawn. He was an executioner, ready to lay down his judgment.

It was no wonder Leaf Bud City's crime rate had gone down after Lesus had assumed office.

With the stone wall against my back, handcuffs binding me, and no one else in the room but Lesus and me -- in fact, had he changed my clothes? -- the situation was so bizarre that I couldn't help but quip, "Lesus, are you trying to be kinky?"

I expected that he would roll his eyes or frown at me. Instead, he said, "...Maybe."

Maybe?!

"This isn't what I meant when I said you should loosen up more," I commented dryly. "Have you gotten too into your SM play with Metal?"

Who are you, and what have you done with Lesus Judgment?!

Finally, Lesus rolled his eyes at me. "What do you remember?"

I furrowed my brows, my headache making me wince again. What had I been doing? Why don't I remember...

Lesus held up an empty bottle, drawing my attention to it. "Maybe this will jog your memory. I confiscated it as evidence."

"Oh." Although the bottle was empty, I'd drunk so many bottles just like it that I couldn't mistake it for anything else. It was a bottle of drunk-in-one.

Oh. Right.

I had been at a drinking contest.

I squeezed my eyes shut, willing the throbbing pain to go away. It was hard to think, but since Lesus mentioned that he had confiscated that bottle as "evidence," did that mean he had been there at the scene?

Well, shit.

"What happened?" I asked carefully. I only remembered drinking bottle after bottle. And winning. I had been winning! Ugh, my head...

These stupid chains. I tugged at them, but I was certainly no Roland, who could probably break through these shackles with brute strength or battle aura or something else damn expert swordsmen could do. Should I try gathering the dark element?

In a flat voice, Lesus said, "You got drunk."

I stilled, flashes of disjointed memories coming back to me. Opponents face-planting one after another. Laughter -- mine? -- ringing in my ears. Empty bottles lining the table.

Blood drained out of my face.

I got drunk. In... public?

My current expression must not be pretty.

I'd gone out wearing the Dragon's Saint Brigandine, not wanting anyone to recognize me. The stingy shirt had wanted my blood, like always, and... if I'd gotten drunk, if I'd continued drinking longer than I had planned, that meant way more than three hours had passed! The transformation must've been up. Don't tell me I revealed myself as the Sun Knight in front of everyone!

"Please tell me I didn't do anything embarrassing!" I blurted.

Oh dear God of Light. Teacher is so going to kill me if he hears about this!

Lesus didn't answer, instead asking, "What were you doing there?"

"Drinking, duh," I answered but immediately wished I'd answered differently. Lesus did not look the least bit impressed. It wouldn't surprise me if the next word out of his mouth was a resounding, "Guilty!"

"Why were you there in the first place?" he continued to ask and folded his arms across his chest. He stared directly at me, watching me closely. Yup, he definitely thought me guilty. Even though he couldn't use sensing like me, he could detect lies just as well as -- no, maybe even better than -- me. I really had been there to drink. I'd also wanted to win the contest, but that made no difference.

I gulped. Is this how criminals getting interrogated by the Judgment Knight feel? I confessed, "I got bored, okay? Now will you tell me if I did anything embarrassing?"

His expression remained impassive. He must've already known why I was there. Why even ask me then? Stupid tapeworm.

"When I got there," Lesus began to say, "you were drinking against a hefty man. You beat him just as I was about to leave. I thought you were still sober at the time, but I was wrong."

I could barely remember the guy Lesus was talking about. Was he the one with the ugly beard? Or the one with a pot belly?

"You spoke normally enough and taunted your next opponent."

That didn't sound all that bad.

"But when you realized that you had finished drinking every single drop of liquor--"

I tilted the bottle. A single drop dissolved on my tongue.

"That's when things got messy."

"Where's your liquor? Bring them out!"

"Sir, that's all we have--"

"You call this a drinking contest? How laughable!"

I froze. Bottles smashed against the ground. Wind whipped around me. A deep frown, and a rough chin, not quite stubble, but noticeably male.

"I've always hated you. Why do you always look so imposing?"

My fingers reached for that frown, ghosting across his rough chin to touch his lips. How tiring it must be to always have to frown. To hell with expectations!

I groaned. "Oh no no no..."

"What was with the wind?" Lesus asked. As if that was of any importance!

"It was unbearably warm," I answered anyway. And it had been. Okay, maybe it was important.

A hand grabbed me, but I didn't care. I let a crackle of lightning gather, forcing him to let go. Then, I undid the clasp on my cloak, tossing it aside. I pulled at the shirt underneath to no avail. Why was it so damn warm?

My lord, the sixth hour approaches. Do you wish to provide another 200cc of blood?

Just how drunk had I been to keep the transformation going for so long?!

"No, no, no! Go away already!" I said.

Very well, my lord.

"Shit."

If I had let the transformation dissolve, then...

But no. I'd stumbled immediately after dispelling the transformation. There had been... arms around me, and something heavy rested against my head, hiding me. His robes.

I pushed at the heavy material, but it was too confusing to untangle myself from it. I pulled at my shirt. That was much easier. The buttons slipped apart, the cool air a much needed reprieve.

"And pray tell," Lesus went on to say, "did you think I was suffering from the heat too?"

"...Yes, actually."

Too much. Totally wearing too much.

I reached out, pushing against the heavy cloth, trying to find some sort of clasp or button. So many layers. I tugged at the cloth, fingers actually finding skin -- his collarbone? -- and then calloused fingers closed around my wrist.

"In the name of the Judgment Knight, I hereby arrest you for disrupting the public!"

"...not for molesting you?" I said weakly, finally remembering what had happened.

Dear God of Light. I think I might have actually groped his butt too, after he announced the arrest. I'd always wondered if anyone could even feel his butt through all the layers he wore. The answer was yes.

I must've really had a death wish. Forget my teacher. Lesus is going to kill me before my teacher can even find his way back to town!

"I would rather not remind anyone," Lesus said, arms still folded.

I tugged at the chains. So that's why I'm here. "Not in that way," hah. Lesus even had to "arrest" me to take me away from the scene. I gulped and asked, "Did anyone figure out my identity?"

"From the crowd there? No. All they could have seen was a flash of your white hair."

"But?"

"I can't guarantee no one from my platoon figured it out."

"Your platoon was there too?!"

"Which was why a quick arrest was even more prudent. I sent them back on their patrols and took you straight here."

I breathed a sigh of relief. As things went, this wasn't a complete disaster.

"Okay," I said. "I'm really, really sorry, Lesus. Will you let me go now?"

I could undo the shackles myself, but that wouldn't mean the same as Lesus forgiving me. I'd really screwed up this time, forcing Lesus to clean up my mess once again. If Lesus hadn't been there, I don't want to imagine what could have happened.

"...No."

"No...?" I repeated dumbly. Had I heard him correctly?

A slow, scary smile spread across his face. I take it back. Lesus should just continue frowning! This was way too scary! "Supreme Dragon, in case you forgot, you are a prisoner of the Church of the God of Light. Enjoy your stay."

"Lesus, I promise I won't do it again!" I blurted when it was apparent that Lesus was going to leave me here. He paused without turning around. I hurriedly added on, "I did win the contest right? Then, there's no reason for me to participate again! They promised the winner a year's worth of vouchers for any shop of the victor's choosing."

"I should have known," he said, shaking his head. "I take it you'll be using it at the sweets shop?"

I nodded hurriedly. "That's why you've got to let me go back there and claim my reward. Since they ran out of booze, that meant the contest couldn't continue. I was obviously the victor, right?"

"How do you intend to claim the reward after making such a scene?" Lesus questioned.

"Uh..."

If I could help it, I'd rather not step foot in that place again, but the vouchers...! A year's worth of free cake and pies!

"How would you even use those vouchers?" he prodded.

"You could use them?" I suggested.

He shook his head. "No thanks, I would rather not make people think the molester and I still keep in contact."

"Roland could use them!" I finally said. I looked enough like "Hell Knight" while wearing the Dragon's Saint Brigandine that he could use the vouchers with no problem!

Lesus stilled, as if he had suddenly realized something. Huh? Oh. OH. Imagine the headlines...

Read all about it! Read all about it! Hell Knight gropes Judgment Knight in a sordid affair!

People could very well mistake me for Roland. I couldn't help the laughter that threatened to bubble out of me. I snickered.

"Grisia, this isn't funny," he grumbled.

"Oh, so it's Grisia again?"

Hey, you can't blame me for laughing. This is hilarious!

"You should go apologize to Roland," Lesus said. "He's been stuck indoors helping Storm correct all the documents you dumped on him. And now he possibly has to deal with new rumors too."

"Spoilsport. But does this mean you're letting me go now?"

Lesus sighed. "Only so you can apologize to Roland. You could have gotten out of those shackles yourself, in any case."

"But it wouldn't be the same," I said with a shrug.

"It wouldn't," he agreed.

He moved closer, undoing one shackle at a time. He was so close that I could hear what he was muttering under his breath. "And this is why I never drink. Who would clean up these messes otherwise..."

I smiled weakly.

Indeed, what would I do without Lesus?

In a louder voice, Lesus asked, "Where did you put the doors of the Blaze Knight Platoon?"

"Ah, they're..." I told Lesus as he removed the shackles.

After the weight of the shackles was lifted, Lesus sighed and let his head fall against my shoulder. It was a different kind of weight altogether, not uncomfortable. That strange smile and his usual frown were both absent, leaving behind a much more unguarded expression. Sensing might not be able to capture all the nuances in a person's expression, but this was definitely an open one. "You know, Grisia, if you ever get bored, you could always come to me. We're friends, right?"

Hands now free, I lifted one and settled it on Lesus's shoulder. "Yeah, I know."


I was basking in the warmth of friendship when I recalled something that didn't make sense. I rubbed my wrists as we were about to leave. To think Lesus actually chained me up and didn't refute it when I said he was being kinky!

"Come to think of it, what did you mean by 'maybe'?"

"..."

"Lesus? What's with the sudden silence?"

"..."

"Hey, answer already! Lesus! Don't you dare walk away! Hey!"

Notes:

Credit goes to Kiyutsuna for the crack still remaining crack, and for pretty much the entire last scene. Possible extra scenes to come.