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What is the real purpose of a crow's feather in a hat?

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“Will you be wearing those crow feathers on your head again?” Jin Moo-Hak was asking as he watched his new girlfriend pull her camisole over the sheer lace bra he had been concentrating abstractly on. “I don’t think they fit you,” he claimed.

“Oh?” Dali murmured absentmindedly. She picked out two dresses from their closet and went straight to the mirror to check her reflection in each of her choices.

Moo-Hak nearly rolled his eyes when she couldn’t seem to decide which to wear. He thought the red one was an obvious choice since it had no feather to attach, but what did he know of pretentious parties? The outfit that had been chosen for him- quite strictly, mind you - was hanging on his side of his former walk-in closet.

He eyed the pale ‘eggshell’ and dark blue ensemble with a disapproving eye. This is not what he would have chosen himself - it was much too drab and, well, pretentious - but he had agreed to wear whatever she chose for him, so there was that.

When he turned back around, she had pulled on a fancy petticoat that did little to hide the alluring curve of her hips. The garment's frills suggested she had decided to wear the red number after all.

Moo-Hak smiled to himself, proud that he seemed to be affecting her sense of fashion, somehow. However, his smile faded fast when he saw just how far down the plunge on the front of the dress went.

“No!”

Dali jumped, startled by the sudden outcry behind her. She turned around to inquire, meeting her boyfriend’s furious gaze with a raised brow.

Moo-Hak was not having that feigned innocence today. She was nearly a married woman and should know that the dress was too provocative. “You’re not wearing that,” he jumped off the bed and started towards her. “I won’t allow it!” he yelled.

Dali didn’t even bat an eyelash. She merely kept pulling at the hooks and pulling the dress taut around her generous bosom.

“Did you not hear me?” Moo-Hak demanded as he neared her. She had almost finished up the buttons on the side of the offending garment when he stepped in behind her. “It’s too provocative, darling,” his tone softened, trying to reason with her.

Dali merely stepped around him in search of her next piece to wear. A diamond and pearl earring ensemble soon dangled from her ears, and as she reached for the more demure lace-styled hairpin on the bedside table, the offensive dress seemed to slip a little and reveal more cleavage than it already did.

Moo-Hak’s eyes nearly popped out of their sockets when it seemed to stretch all the way to the tips of her breast! He was definitely not going to allow it, no matter how European the party was meant to be.

He reached out then and grabbed her around her tiny waist, losing his balance and tumbling unto the bed with his startled lover. She pushed back, pivoting in an attempt to rise up again and be about her business, but Moo-Hak’s arms were strong and unyielding. He was not letting go of her until she understood his point, he decided. Yet still, she wiggled, giggled and demanded to be released.

“Not this dress, please,” Dali’s desperate boyfriend repeated. “It’s much too risque. If a button pops off, the whole thing could cascade.”

Dali laughed, wiggling closer as she finally looked up into his eyes. “Is that so?; she smiled and raised her arms to wrap around his neck. “What would you have me wear then?”

Moo-Hak was suddenly speechless, racking his brain quickly for a suitable choice. He looked up into their walk-in closet and gaped, “Where are all your clothes?” he asked?

“Still in the Netherlands,” Dali answered quite absently, seeming to consider her own oversight. She had very few clothes in the closet, so how did she have clothes to wear everyday?

“This is not right!” Moo-Hak declared. We need to get you more clothes."

"Hmm," Dali agreed, nodding. "How about we simply take a trip to visit?"

There was a deafening silence. For a full two minutes, the lovers simply looked each other in the eyes.

And then Moo-Hak smiled, "No welcome parties again, though. Right?"

"Hahahaha! Of course, no welcome parties. I promise." Dali paused. "Are you sure you don't want me to wear the feathers, though? I can think of a few way to use feathers," she winked.

Moo-Hak was confused. "What are you talking about?" He asked.

Dali leaned up and whispered into his ears.

Moo-Hak's eyes widened. He smiled and suddenly tumbled off the bed, righting himself quickly to head for the closet and the feather-fascinator box.

Dali giggled, wiggling out of the scrap of cloth that covered nothing. She picked up her favorite party dress and slipped into it quickly. Knowing Moo-Hak, it would be harder to get to the party on time if she was not dressed when he came back from grabbing her fancy hair clip.

She smiled a little when his disappointed voice called out from behind her, "What are you doing?"

"Getting dressed. We can't be late for your step-mom's party." She reached to take her fascinator from him. "You know how she is."

"B... bu... but!" Moo-Hak complained.

Dali hugged him then, "Wear your jacket, darling. We can use the feathers later. Hmm?"

Moo-Hak still looked disappointed, but then he smiled and said, "I'll be using all the time at the party to think of a million ways to make you scream."

Dali giggled, sashaying away to find her shoes.

Moo-Hak watched her wiggling hips as she put on her shoes and just knew it was going to be a long, long night.