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the perfect love potion (gone wrong?)

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Valentine’s Day was so freaking dumb, it almost melted Jimin’s mind. I know, lets have a holiday to mis-teach young people what love is, entice them to be greedy and inculcate insecurity. Really, it's a great idea, we'll sell more crap they never needed; think of the economy. All those cards, chocolates, sweat-shop lingerie items in chemical dyed tissue. Really, really? It's right up there with Halloween, screw showing respect to the dead, let's sell insanely overhyped costumes made in sweatshops and get the kids even more addicted to candy.

You go to Hogsmeade and you’ve got all these couples in your face, kissing and proposing and going on dates, and it’s not that Jimin’s jealous per se- he just hates the fact that it’s all up in his face. And it’s not much salvation to stay in Hogwarts instead, because even then he is constantly bombarded with proposals. Not to him of course. To his best friend.

Jeon Jungkook, Gryffindor’s it boy, was of course popular among the girls. And the guys too, he daresaid. Walking to class with him was like walking through a sing-off, what with musical Valentine’s popping out of nowhere and chocolate suddenly appearing in his bag. And that was not counting Peeves constantly singing a stupid a little jig-

Jungkookie’s so wanted, all eyes are on him
His friend’s so damn salty, poor lonely Jimin!

-with an accompanying choreography. It wasn’t even a good choreography. His footwork had room for improvisation. Lots of room.

Jimin had half a mind to toss all his books at the stupid poltergeist. Thankfully, the students paid no notice, having learned to tune out Peeves’ stupid rhymes like white noise.

Jungkook would just laugh it off, and promise to share tho chocolates with Jimin later. Jimin knew it didn’t really mean anything, but it still drove him insane.

It wasn’t even the fact that Jimin wasn’t getting any Valentines himself. Well… maybe that mattered just a bit. No, it was that all of them had to go after his one and only best friend, Jeon Jungkook. Like, what did he have, really? He was handsome, and cute, and hot sometimes, sure. And maybe he was kind and helpful. And maybe also brilliant at Quidditch and excelling all his classes. And also funny and friendly. Big deal. Anyone could be all those things. Right?

By time they’d arrived to Potions, Jimin felt sour. They opened the door and the room immediately exploded into pink, and a flock of red birds flew into formation from seemingly nowhere, spelling the words “Happy Valentine’s Day, Jungkook!” with a little heart beside it. Jimin rolled his eyes and cast a quick Vanishing Spell. Jungkook just laughed awkwardly, and headed to his seat.

“Doesn’t it bother you?” Jimin asked, as they unpacked their textbooks onto the table. “The constant serenading?”

“Kind of, but it’s still nice. At least I get free chocolate out of it, you know?” Jungkook chuckled, extracting a box of chocolate from his bag. “Here, take one.”

Jimin took it despite himself- it was hard to say no to Jungkook, and he did enjoy chocolate.

“Good morning, class, today we’re going to be starting on a very special potion. Can anyone explain to me what this is?”

The entire class leaned forward to peek in the cauldron the professor was showing.

“Amortentia.” Jimin’s fellow Ravenclaw, and also the smartest student in the grade, Namjoon piped up. “It’s the most powerful love potion in the world. It has a distinctive mother-of-pearl sheen, and steam rises from it in spirals. It smells different to each person, according to what attracts them. It’s temporary and only create the illusion of love, rather than love itself.”

“Correct. Ten points to Ravenclaw. As you can all see, this is a perfect Amortentia. Would anyone like to come forward and smell it?”

A girl volunteered, stepping forward, and sniffed it extravagantly. “It smells like… Jungkook.” She looked towards said Gryffindor with a stupid blush, and Jimin almost puked. Was that supposed to be smooth? A pickup line? It was so clearly desperate.

Jungkook just scratched the back of his head and smiled awkwardly. It was so obvious these kinds of public declarations of love were annoying, why did people still do it?

“All right, that’s enough. Everyone please get to your cauldrons and start working on it. Instructions are on the blackboard.”

Jimin looked at the board in interest. A love potion, huh? He could think of a use for that.

~

The plan was easy, but Jimin still felt a bit guilty doing it. It’s okay, it’s only for a day, he convinced himself. All he had to do was ask to taste Jungkook’s drink at breakfast, and slip a bit of the potion in. Just to see what it was like, of course. Maybe see a few jealous faces around. But mostly just to experience what it’d be like to be loved by Gryffindor's- no, the whole school’s it boy.

The night passed by as it would any other night- but Jimin felt a lot more different. His stomach churned with anticipation for the next day. He wasn’t sure why he was so excited, honestly, he’d known Jungkook forever and it was only going to be slightly different- yet he felt butterflies all over him whenever he thought about the prospect of Jungkook loving him. Jimin knew he loved him sure, but it would surely feel different if it wasn’t entirely platonic. It was dizzying.

Should he be concerned about how much he was feeling just at the thought of Jungkook loving him? Probably. Was he going to be? Absolutely not. He had to get a good night’s sleep- the school’s beloved only deserved the best by his side, after all.

~

It wasn’t hard to execute the plan at all. When Jimin inconspicuously asked for Jungkook’s orange juice, the younger easily offered it to him, with the adorable smile Jimin loved so much. Heart pounding, she extricated the small vial of Amortentia from his robes and poured it in as discreetly as possible. He pretended to take a sip, and returned it to Jungkook, who was none the wiser. Jimin watched, trying his best to stay calm- why was he so nervous?- as Jungkook lifted up the glass and put it straight to his lips.

There. Done. It was done. Jungkook would be in love with him any minute now.

“So,” Jimin started, unsure if the potion was already working. The textbook said its effect started immediately, but Jungkook wasn’t all over him yet Well. Any time now, surely. “Wanna hang out at the lake today? I have some homework I need to finish and every time I enter the Slytherin common room, Yoongi-hyung is snogging his boyfriend all over the place.”

“God, same, it’s like I’m just trying to vibe next to the fireplace and boom Namjoon-hyung and Seokjin-hyung are there and I don’t even have to look to know what they’re doing, ew. So that’s a yes from me.” Jungkook grinned and went on with his breakfast. Had Jimin messed up the potion somehow? No, the professor had said it was perfect… so why wasn’t Jungkook fawning at the prospect of going out with him?

“Er, I mean, only if you want to.”

“Oh, of course I want to.” Jungkook finished the rest of his juice and stood up. “Let’s head to class, yeah?”

“Yeah. Okay.”

What had he done wrong? Jungkook wasn’t acting different at all.

Jimin spent the rest of the day trying to provoke Jungkook into doing something, anything, affectionate- but he responded to everything as would usually. Jimin was starting to suspect Jungkook must have not ingested the potion at all. He didn’t know how, he’d practically seen Jungkook gulp it down, and yet…?

“So, the lake?” Jungkook asked, as they headed back to the castle from their last class, Care of Magical Creatures. “I’ll get my stuff and meet you there in fifteen, yeah?”

“Yeah, sure. See you!”

Jungkook smiled at him, and Jimin could sense a group of flittering girls nearby giggle. He was getting frustrated, why wasn’t his amazing plan working? Did perfect magic malfunction too? He’d never heard about it.

He supposed he would have to let it go now. The school day was over already, something had definitely gone wrong. Even if it had worked, the Amortentia would’ve worn off by now. With a heavy sense of regret, he headed upstairs to get his books, and returned to the lake.

Jungkook was already there, relaxing by a tree. His books laid by his side, and he appeared to be humming something as he looked through them. Not wanting to have his presence be known yet, Jimin tiptoed over carefully and stood on the other side of the tree, listening. He half-expected Jungkook to be humming some sort of love ballad, but on closer discernment it just turned out to be an anime opening. He shook his head in exasperation, but a small smile slipped its way onto his face.

“I’m here, Kook.” He swished his robes with great flourish as he sat down on the grass. “What are you looking for?”

“I thought we could start with Potions. That sure is a long essay he assigned us.” He sighed as he picked up the Potions book and began looking for the page for Amortentia.

“Do you think Amortentia doesn’t work sometimes, even when it’s made perfectly?” Jimin tried to keep the strain of curiosity out of his voice, opting instead to open his own Potions textbook as well and stoically avoiding Jungkook’s eyes.

“I doubt it. I don’t think perfectly made potions go wrong, what’s the point of magic then? Aha,” he said with a flourish, placing the book down with the page open. “Crap, I forgot to bring ink. You have any?”

“Mhm.” Jimin absentmindedly handed him his bottle. Come on, confess your love for me already!

“Jimin-hyung, can I ask you something?”

This was it! This was the moment! Jimin’s eyes lit up as he looked at Jungkook again.

“Yeah?”

“Do you think if I mixed Amortentia with Felix Felicis it would basically make me a love sorcerer?” His question was genuine, eyes focused on the lake as he thought intently. Jimin stared at his curious eyes, and then despite himself, burst out into laughter.

“You… you’re an idiot, you know that?”

“Reminded of it every day.” He smiled and shrugged.

“No wonder your name has Kook in it. You are a kook. A completely, totally crazy one.”

“Oh, so original hyung, I wonder where you come up with these zingers? Is there a guide? Lend it to me so I can use them on all the ladies constantly over me.”

“Ladies are not constantly over you.” Lie.

“You’re right. Men too.”

“Nope, they just like you for your looks.” Also a lie.

“Ah, so you admit I’m handsome?”

“The house elves are handsomer than you.” Triple lie.

“Handsomer isn’t a word.”

“It is now.”

“Wait, I think I had an epiphany.”

Jimin lazily perused his textbook, looking for the text he had to copy. “What is it?”

“If a foursome is sex between four people, and a threesome is sex between three people, then handsome…?”

Jimin paused. He processed. He scoffed, which soon turned into a chuckle. A few seconds later he dissolved into a puddle of laughter, his stomach shaking as he fought a new gale of giggles. Jungkook ended up mirroring him. They were not laughing because the joke was funny anymore- the joke was barely on their minds now- but the evening air was fresh, the lake felt friendly, the grass was green and it felt like a moment one should laugh.

“Holy shit, marry me.”

The laughter came to an abrupt halt as the words hung in the air. Jimin panicked. Shit, had he said that? Was it Jungkook? From how drunk he was in the moment a few seconds ago he suddenly couldn’t remember at all. He looked at Jungkook hesitantly, wondering if he’d heard- or if he’d said . Jungkook was looking back at him just as curiously.

Jimin narrowed his eyes. “Did… did you say that?”

“Say what?”

But a steady blush had found its way across Jungkook’s face, blatant enough to see even in the setting sun.

“Marry me?”

“Maybe a date first.” There was a teasing smile in Jungkook’s voice.

Jimin tried his best to be annoyed with the trap he’d walked right into, but it was so hard when Jungkook looked at him like that.

So the word slipped out without him noticing.

“Okay.”

Jungkook’s face fell, not into a frown- more of a confused gape. He tilted his head and stared right into Jimin’s soul, and Jimin could sense that something was heavy in the air- he had no idea what it was, or even if it was good or bad- but it was there. Jungkook smiled at him in a dazed fashion.

“Okay. The romantic kind, I hope?” He looked like he was overstepping a dangerous boundary, but it was a line they had been toeing for years. It came almost naturally.

Jimin gave a heavy sigh. “No. No, you don’t.”

“What do you mean I don’t? You don’t get to-”

“No. I…” He sighed. “Don’t hate me for this. I gave you Amortentia.”

“Huh? When?”

“In the morning, when I asked for your juice.”

Jungkook’s eyes drifted upwards as if recalling, and he seemed to succeed. “Oh. You slipped me a love potion.”

“Yeah. I expected it to wear off by now. Sorry.”

“Well, too bad, because I don’t even think it worked. Felt the same as I’ve felt always, so there. No difference.”

“I know!” Jimin looked at him in indignation. “I was so annoyed. I was hoping you’d serenade me or some other sappy bullshit like that.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m jea… no. Because I wanted your undivided attention, if only for a day.”

“You always have my undivided attention.”

“Not with all these girls- and boys- swarming around! One day you’re gonna date someone and it’s not gonna be me and I hate that! Wait… that came out wro-”

“So you want to date me?” Jungkook’s eyes were glassy, his brown pupils reflecting flecks of golden as the sun finally began to disappear. His mouth remained a straight line, neither a frown nor a smile.

“That’s not what I-”

“Okay. We can date then.”

“D… date? As in like… actually? Like the romantic ty-”

“Park Jimin.” Jungkook voice took a tone of vexation. “Are you blind? Or just stupid? How can’t you tell why the potion didn’t work?”

“I don’t know!”

“It’s so damn easy. It’s because I’ve always been in love with you, you fucking idiot .”

“Oh.” Oh. Oh.

“You…”

“Yes. Now please kiss me if you accept me or I will run back to the castle and spend an hour crying in the boys restroom.”

The smile had barely begun to creep up on Jimin’s face as he grabbed Jungkook’s hand and pulled him closer, as comforting darkness enveloped them and the lake began to quieten down. The castle was but a dark silhouette now, as the last hints of the sun had vanished and the moon loomed over them shyly. But Jimin could focus on none of that, because Jungkook was in his arms and that was all that mattered for now.

Well, until more girls came calling for him anyway, just to see him snogging Jimin. Jimin had never felt more victorious in his life.