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2021-10-15
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2023-01-22
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A change of color

Summary:

Kakashi’s Anbu tattoo started to change color the night his Sensei died. His Hokage.
Indicating that his soul-mate had been… born.

And all he could think was: “What a joke.“

 

*******

 

Soul-mate AU, heavy on angst and feels. Slow burn HELL.
Ultimately KakaNaru.

Not underage, though it touches on the canon movie/anime elements.
I will have Kakashi deal with the situation, and it’s not gonna be easy for him, obviously.
Intermittent other relationships, among those KakaIru, NaruSasu, and others.

Notes:

This story will touch on (canon!) dark stuff also. Mind the tags please.
Close to canon up until the kage conference, but will veer off sometime as well as change/stream-line/rewrite canon scenes/things to fit this AU.
Loosely tied to Naruto/Boruto canon after the conference, though with major changes then.

There will be chapter warnings if needed.
PLEASE mind the tags.

Hope you enjoy!!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Prologue - Paint it black

Notes:

The awesome art for this fic/chapter is by @xXYorinoYamaXx on Twitter and I just love it!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

Kakashi had seen many black Anbu tattoos over the years.

 

The ink used for the special forces of the ninja world was imbued with a special kind of chakra, which would darken to black when the wearer encountered their soul-mate, triggering the same process in their counterpart if they wore a matching tattoo. With a tingling sensation.

Given the desire of people wanting to find their soul-mate, almost everybody did wear one. In one way or another.

 

The change of color usually was a quick process, and one which facilitated the rather speedy release of the ninja from the Anbu - soul-bonded ninjas tended to want to protect and be close to their soul-mate after all. And if they hadn’t found them yet when the tattoo changed color, they tended to be rather distracted.

Making them the worst candidates for political or even suicide missions.

And the literal best to protect the village and its occupants.

 

The majority of the Jonin-class ninja in Konohagakure were bonded, as far as Kakashi knew.

 

And none of the guard platoon protecting the Hokage. The whole process made sure that platoon was also made up from rather young ninjas, by default.

 

Kakashi’s own tattoo had stayed red, for years.

He hadn’t really expected anything different, either.

Rin… or even Obito had been dead already after all.

And he had never felt that close to anybody else. 

 

Except Minato and Kushina. 

But they were bonded to each other. 

 

And then, on his first day off in months, when he had been in an Onsen in a small neighboring village for the night, trying to relax, there had been a thin black line around it. Appearing as if through magic. Tickling. He had first thought it to be an optical illusion, rubbing at it. But the reddening of his skin had only emphasized the thin line.

The man on the other side of the basin had clapped his hands, congratulating him with sheer, unadulterated joy. Seeming genuinely happy for him.

 

Kakashi had stared down at his arm, unable to breathe properly, his brain knowing but refusing. 

Because he knew why Minato had given him the day off after months of protecting Kushina, of course. He knew what a gradual darkening meant, too.

Knew that the ink on his soul-mate’s body had been applied, and that they must have been in proximity of each other. 

Knew that the utter thinness of the line on his side meant that the bond would need… time. And that it would finally commence changing color when the relationship would be consumed.

 

And so, when the outer lines of Kakashi’s Anbu tattoo started to change color the night that, unbeknownst to him, his Sensei, his Hokage, fought to the death, all he could think was: "What a joke.“

 

 

 

************************************************************

************************************************************

 

 

 

There’s a rapid knock on the door of his room at the inn. 

Kakashi narrows his eyes, sheathing his father’s tanto in the back holster and getting up in one smooth movement. He opens the door,  silently glowering at the innkeeper. He really isn’t in the mood for any interactions, the tattoo and the meaning of the black line a dead weight, dragging him down. The innkeeper winces at the aura he projects, wringing his hands a bit, his tone frantic, making the hairs on Kakashi’s neck stand up. “Ah, Kakashi-san, forgive me, there have been rumors of an attack on Kon...”

 

Kakashi doesn’t hear the rest, the rushing wind swallowing the words. He pulls the mask from the small bag on his back as he jumps, wills his heartbeat to stay steady. 

He estimates he needs 10 minutes, at maximum speed.

He puts his chakra reserves into the jumps.

5 minutes, now.

 

Sensei. I’m on my way.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kakashi is vibrating with energy, stuck in the barrier in the village.

Why did I enter Konoha from this side. I could be with him if I had taken the other way.

Why. Baka.

 

Next to him Guy and Kurenai glower helplessly at the tails swishing in the distance. 

Kakashi feels sick, the hastily hidden mask a heavy weight in bag at the small of his back. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He can see the glow of the protective barrier when he is finally allowed to rush near. 

Dread runs down his spine.

The only chakra he senses is north of it.

 

He drops to the ground next to the Sandaime. “Sandaime-sama.”

Sarutobi Hiruzen acknowledges him with a nod, but his eyes are on the scene inside the barrier. His tone is gruff, and hard. And riddled with pain. “Hatake Kakashi. I am sorry. This night has taken a lot from all of us.” 

Kakashi blinks and tries to breathe, his hand fruitlessly gathering chakra, small rivulets of lightning sneaking along his arms. He feels the other Anbu present hover behind him, silently, their empathy and despair a stifling blanket. 

 

They know Minato had sent him to his day off, they know he was trapped inside the protective barrier with the others, they know he wasn’t there for the attack, they know he wasn’t there for his Sensei.

They do not carry any grudge. 

 

Just pity.

 

Kakashi does though. The pitch-black fury directed at himself is a writhing, vicious, biting thing. It itches, wanting out, clawing at his insides.

Tearing at his soul.

 

There is nothing outside the tunnel of his vision, locked on the two still figures lying next to the stone slab. There is so much blood it’s even smellable outside the barrier. 

He doesn’t dare to look at the little thing on the slab.

 

There is a surge and the barrier flares and vanishes, and Kakashi’s stomach drops into the void.

Minato didn’t move. Kushina didn’t either. Meaning the barrier vanished because the last bit of chakra holding it up ran out.

There is a sob stuck in his throat.

 

He isn’t sure how he gets to the still forms, or how the two are pushed over on their backs. 

He knows his hands are bloody, and that the blood is still warm. 

 

They look almost peaceful, with tears and the echo of smiles on their slack faces. 

The holes in their guts are brutally huge.

Kakashi wants to scream.

 

Hiruzen’s hand on his shoulder is the only thing keeping him grounded. 

The only thing keeping him sane.

The thing that fuels his hate.

 

Why didn’t you let us help.

Why. 

 

The Sandaime’s voice is brittle, broken around the edges. “They killed my wife and the nurses, too.”

Kakashi blinks, feeling precisely nothing. 

Hiruzen’s fingers dig deeply into the flesh of his shoulder. “I cannot fathom how they knew to attack today.” 

Kakashi can sense him look at the baby, breathing tiredly on the slab. Wrapped in their blanket, still. The blanket I carried home from the shop for her.

Sarutobi Hiruzen sighs. “I guess I will need to retake the hat. And figure out what to do with our new Jinchuriki.”

He pauses and Kakashi knows that the Sandaime has noticed the line around his tattoo. 

Is on the verge of asking. 

 

Kakashi frowns, stepping forward and dislodging the Sandaime’s hand from his shoulder in the process, uncaring for any decorum right now. 

His heart is beating in his throat. 

 

He steps up to the baby, staring down at it.

Stares at the whiskers, the very distinct sign that Kushina had been so afraid of. ‘Imagine, Kakashi. They’ll all know he is Jinchuriki-born. We have to protect him, he’ll draw the villager’s scorn. They will see and know something of the Bijou is in his DNA. Promise me you’ll help me protect him. Promise? There is no-one better to protect him besides us.’ 

Stares at the blue eyes, blinking tiredly and unfocused. Blue, like his. And that blonde hair. So like his, too.

Stares at the small mouth, the small body. The intricate seal on the belly, set perfectly around the bellybutton. ‘We will call him Naruto, after the hero in Sensei Jiraiya’s book, the one who is the future for the ninja world. Namikaze Naruto. What do you think, Kakashi? Maybe he’ll even be strong enough to take the nine-tails from me one day.’

Stares at the red ink of that seal, the line around it thickening by the second, making it seem almost black in the dim light. Triggered by his proximity. You used the ink for the seal, Sensei. … Why?

 

Kakashi stares at it, at him, in a haze.

(in case the image doesn't load)

 

He knows why. 

Of course. 

 

In his mind Minato smiles wistfully.

‘Sometimes, Kakashi, you have to twist fate to get what you want. You have to take a leap of faith. Follow a hunch. Or pick up a glimpse of red to find the love of your life.’

 

He knows.

 

Kind blue eyes that have seen so much death in war, sparkling, with hope.

‘I cannot wait to see what will become of him. I cannot wait to teach him everything I know, just as I tried to teach you. To hold and protect him. I hope you will teach him too, Kakashi.’

 

And he hates it.

 

His Sensei reaches up to affectionately ruffle his hair, touch and words echoing in Kakashi’s mind. ‘You’re a part of this family, Kakashi. My family. Don’t you know that by now?’

 

Kakashi’s voice echoes in the dark night. “His name is Naruto.“

 

He turns and leaves, telling himself his wavering vision is Sharingan-overusage.

 

Notes:

According to Naruto wiki the night the nine-tails attacked Kakashi had a day off.  

Which makes my heart break for him 😭

Chapter 2: Bitterness tastes like chocolate

Notes:

The third Hokage was supposed to be able to use any jutsu. 

Also: my HC as to why Kakashi does not like sweets.

 

And I thought it important keep track of Kakashi’s past with Kinoe/Tenzoe/Yamato as part of this fic. You know, for later on :), so these scenes will be woven in and slightly expanded. 

Chapter Text

 

 

The dream is always the same.

 

Wet, red heat, around his wrist.

The electricity burning itself into his skin.

Screams, in his head, from her mouth, all around them.

 

The scent of copper, everywhere.

 

Her gaze, breaking.

 

The pain in his soul, that is so profound it feels at if it is the only thing real.

 

 

And a whispered word, in the darkness, reverberating through his brain, and which makes no sense to him, then.

 

 

 

Kamui.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He cannot refuse the invitation, the powerful Ne leader never taking a ‘no’ after all. And he is duty bound to answer the call in any case. He stands in front of him, trying to stay neutral, unimpressed. But the words are well chosen, and they cut deep.

 

‘The Sandaime should have let you help.’

 

Kakashi clenches his fist. 

 

‘You should join the Ne, Hatake Kakashi. We protect our own.’

 

Kakashi swallows. Maybe Danzo is right.

 

 

He pretends he needs time to think about it, but then goes and enters the hidden tunnel, darkness paving his way. 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

A wood release user. A wood release user in Ne.

Kakashi’s heart beats hard, once. But the only wood user the leaf has ever had was Hashirama Senju?

 

There really is only one place to look for answers. 

And it’s not as if he has anything to lose, is there.

No, not anymore. And you’re part of the reason I don’t, so…

 

The Hokage’s house is dark and silent, the Anbu guarding him unaware of his presence.

Kakashi opens the paper doors, silently, moving through the house like a ghost. 

Senju Hashirama’s files… the only one to master wood style ninjutsu. 

 

But… where are the files?

 

“Are these the files you are looking for?”

Kakashi starts, eyes snapping to the Sandaime, who throws the files onto the table in front of him. “You… give them to me?”

The Sandaime’s eyes drop away, then to the thin black line around Kakashi’s tattoo, and then return to his eyes. He doesn’t comment. “There was a period of time in the Hidden Leaf Village, when the Leaf tried to reproduce Hashirama’s ninjutsu by injecting his cells into test subjects. But, despite the dedicated efforts of many, the tests to transplant Lord Hashirama’s cells failed. It was deemed a forbidden jutsu and sealed away.”

Kakashi looks down at the papers. “That is disturbing.”

The Sandaime doesn’t even blink. “What is even more disturbing that there have been reports of incidents in which new-born infants have been going missing back then.”

Back then... Kakashi locks eyes with the Hokage. “How long ago? You think they continued the experiments on babies. I can’t believe that.”

The stance of the Sandaime shifts slightly. “Yes. But I believe that someone has been continuing the experiments, and has been trying to implant the cells of Lord Hashirama. To create a wood release wielder.”

The Sandaime raises his chin, straightens his back. “Had that been the case, then perhaps the Yondaime need not have sacrificed his life.”

Pain shoots through Kakashi, pure and vicious and fresh, still. His tattoo seems to burn for an instant. He swallows, tries not to react, keeping still and sounding unaffected by sheer force of will. “But if Hashirama-sama’s cells had been implanted into an infant…”

However they kept it quiet about infants missing… and several at that. What the hell happened here, more than 10 years ago. And… who helped to hush this up?

The Sandaime turns away, giving Kakashi space to breathe, to collect himself. “Perhaps, if one of the very first infants who were kidnapped somehow managed to survive such a procedure…”

Kakashi’s mouth is dry. Then he would be Kinoe’s age now… there’s a wood-style-user in Ne and he could have saved Minato.

Could have saved Kushina. The pain in him twists, sending it’s hooks deeper. 

There would be no black ink on a baby now. 

He blinks, trying to stay calm, a shudder running through him. 

Would I… would the soul-match still exist then? Or would I … be free.

Something in him twists, at the thought of losing this little of a connection he still has to Minato and Kushina, too. As weird as it may all be.

 

He cannot think.

 

Kakashi looks down at the papers in his fingers, tries to push through the fog in his mind.

Sandaime, I have judged you wrongly. I think.

 

He raises his head, his voice shaking just the tiniest bit. “Sandaime, what about… “, he swallows, his voice breaking on the words. “What about Namikaze Naruto.”

The Sandaime turns back slightly, looking at Kakashi for a long moment. “He will be taken care of.” 

Kakashi grimaces, the tattoo pulsing again. “By whom?”

Sarutobi Hiruzen’s eyes narrow. “He will be put in an orphanage.”

Kakashi’s eyes snap up. “But there are still Uzumaki out there. And he is the heir to the Namikaze and Uzumaki clans, he should be…”

The Sandaime interjects. “Honored by the village?” He scoffs, just slightly. “The villagers just lost a lot of their loved ones, and their more than beloved young Hokage and his wife to the very monster that is now sealed into their child.” He exhales, looking away for a moment. “You know they will loathe him, Kakashi.”

Kakashi feels sick.

Hiruzen quirks an eyebrow. “And you know that if we call him after his father that he will be hunted by Minato’s enemies. Minato was the only flee-on-sight Shinobi and he was a hero in the war. He has left many mourning families behind.”

Kakashi raises a shaking hand to his mouth, covering his mask with it. Yes, yes, I know that, but…

The Sandaime exhales again, with a sigh. “For the sake of the boy I have decided to strip him of his father’s name and heritage, at least until he is of age. I have set up a law that no-one must tell him of him being the Jinchuriki either.”

 

There is a pause in which the words settle. And then Kakashi blurts out, unable to help himself, his tone bordering on insubordination. “What? No, you cannot do that. He is the heir of the Yondaime, and the son of one of the strongest Kunoichis out there, his lineage is one of the most promising, I bet he will become Hokage one day if trained properly. If you strip the knowledge from him and his proverbial rank in the village his life will be absolutely miserable.” He gesticulates, wildly, his pulse thundering. “He will be shunned, he will be hated and he won’t know why, that will be beyond cruel!” 

The Sandaime inhales, lifting his chin a bit, his tone hard. “It will be wise. He will wear the Uzumaki clan-name, even though he is not a red-head.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he scoffs, his voice raising until he’s almost yelling, tone dripping with resentment. “Oh, that’s funny. And wise? What do you mean wise. I know how it is to grow up all alone, and a fate like that is not wise.”

The Sandaime looks at him for a long moment, almost glowering. When he finally speaks his voice is hard, final. “My decision stands.” He sighs through his nose, holding up his hand when Kakashi opens his mouth to yell at him again, uncaring. “But, given your… predicament, I will allow for an amendment.”

 

Kakashi’s mouth snaps shut, and he tries to get his shivering limbs back under control. 

The Sandaime looks at him, eyes drifting over to the tattoo once more for a moment. “You are Anbu and you were Minato’s pupil, and as such more than suited to protect. Whatever will happen… to and with you and him, it must not happen for a long time though.”

Kakashi pulls a face, unwilling to comment on that. That I am more than aware of, Hokage-sama.

The Sandaime continues, his voice a bit softer. “I wish for you to protect him, whenever you can. Protect the child, protect the young man, and when he has come of age, you may tell him everything. Or, if and when he finds out by himself.” He quirks an eyebrow. “Would that be acceptable.”

Kakashi looks away, the taste of bile in his mouth. His voice is harsh. “Shinobi die. My life especially should not be a guarantee for his knowledge. He should know as soon as he can understand. He should be told who his parents were, what he is heir to.”

Hiruzen sighs. “It is true that Shinobi die.” He hesitates before continuing. “It is also true that those with a goal, with a life-line tend to survive. This will be your goal.”

Kakashi scoffs again, his tone carrying loads of bitterness, his words deliberately crude. “My goal is to survive and protect and help my Sensei’s child until he is old enough for me to fuck him? You cannot be serious.”

Sarutobi Hiruzen narrows his eyes, his tone clipped. “Your goal is to survive and protect and help your Sensei’s child until he is old enough to receive all you can give him. Knowledge and otherwise.”

Kakashi sneers, revulsion clear in his tone. “I won’t promise that.”

The Sandaime quirks an eyebrow., his tone grave. “A shame.”

 

Two steps, faster than Kakashi anticipates, and Hiruzen’s palm touches his chest with one hand, his other on Kakashi’s arm. “Fire Release: Heavenly Prison.”

Fire slams into Kakashi, and he drops to his knees on the ground, aching under the sudden, massive chakra drain. 

Hiruzen’s voice is soft. “I am sorry, Kakashi, but I cannot let you tell him. But I do want you to protect him.” He closes his eyes for a moment. “So I will seal your ability to speak of your knowledge to him, until he is old enough or comes to the knowledge himself. I will bind your promise to protect him into it.”

Kakashi hisses, his left arm coming up to try to dislodge the Hokage’s arm from his chest. His voice is pressed, pleading. “If you do that, Sandaime, he will suffer so much.”

I will suffer so much.

Sarutobi Hiruzen’s voice is kind, laced with understanding and sadness. “I know.” He drops his hand from Kakashi’s arm, reaching for Kakashi’s mask, his right staying on his chest, matter of factly. He pulls the mask down and Kakashi feels naked, vulnerable and shaking suddenly, the air on his chin and mouth seemingly frigid. The Sandaime’s voice comes as if from far away. “Open your mouth, Hatake Kakashi.”

Kakashi raises his eyes, and the Hokage sighs, deeply, before reaching back to retrieve a brush from a jar. “Don’t make me force you, please.”

Kakashi’s voice is brittle. “Please, Hokage-sama.”

Hiruzen Sarutobi turns back to him, his voice and face tired. “Open wide, tongue out.”

Kakashi hesitates, for a long, long moment. Looks up in the old, tired eyes of his Hokage. Tries to see beyond the hurt, beyond the pain, beyond the words. Beyond the exhaustion written into the wrinkled face. 

Sarutobi Hiruzen leans closer, just a bit, his voice a whisper. “Let the boy come into his own strength. Help him unleash his own potential, unburdened by the past.” He blinks, the fire draining a bit more of Kakashi’s chakra., making him shiver. “Open wide, and stretch your tongue out. I would rather not do this to you while you’re unconscious, Kakashi. That would be unbecoming.”

 

Unbecoming

Kakashi closes his eyes, feeling sick, but he opens his mouth, eventually, his whole body shivering under the drain of chakra. 

The brush is soft on his tongue, painting an intricate pattern. Tickling.

The Sandaime’s voice reaches him as if from far away. “I made the seal taste like chocolate. I hope you like.”

Kakashi tries not to throw up, his stomach churning, the taste of dark chocolate burning through his mind. Something clicks into place, with devastating finality. 

 

The fire leaves his chest, together with the tickling touch of the brush. “You can close your mouth now.”

Sarutobi withdraws slightly, and Kakashi collapses on the ground, gasping for breath.

His mouth is full of the taste of sweet, sweet chocolate and he grimaces, retching, the meaning behind the taste making his stomach churn. 

He tries to swallow the taste down, but it stays and he groans, pulling his mask up. “Will the taste stay?”

The Sandaime sighs. “For a few days. The seal will become mostly invisible as soon as it fades.” He steps back, clasps his arms behind his back once more. “For your information. I will try to reach Jiraiya. He might want to amend my decision, and it would be within his rights as godfather. I will make sure you two will meet to discuss Naruto’s future.”

 

Kakashi chuckles, feeling like crying. “Jiraiya-sama has been on solitary missions for years now. I doubt he will want to settle down and take in his pupil’s child. Especially since that child is carrying the reason why Sensei Minato is dead. His beloved pupil.”

He clutches his chest, willing himself to breathe. 

The Hokage sounds defeated. “I know.”

Kakashi knows he sounds the same, uncaring for the implied insubordination. “I do hope you made the right decision, Hokage-sama.”

The Sandaime nods, once, turning away. “So do I.”

He tilts his head, and then leaves, with measured steps, disappearing into the dark of the house. 

 

 

Kakashi gasps in the dark, trying to get past the stiflingly sweet taste on his tongue.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

The taste stays through the Miso soup and the simple rice he has the next morning.

It stays through the mission rations of the five-day-mission he is sent on.

It stays when he slumps on his chair at the Ramen shop, exhausted after the taxing mission, slurping the broth.

 

He tries to scratch it off when he finally returns to his apartment.

The toothbrush tastes like mint-cake in his mouth.

 

He takes a kunai, and scratches along the surface, the taste of copper mixing with the sweetness.

 

He shivers, watching the red drop into the basin, his hands bloody as well.

Tears drop into the red, and then he gasps, his breath too fast, his mind too empty.

 

He washes his hands and the basin, again and again, trying to get rid of the blood on his hands, to no avail.

 

The night is riddled with his moans, unable to shake the nightmares. 

 

In the morning he hides his scratched hands in his gloves, and the glowing red eye under the headband.

 

He swallows, harshly, past the taste of chocolate and the pain in his tongue.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

He should not be surprised that Danzo tries to have the Sandaime assassinated. 

And by the wood style user at that.

 

Kakashi does his fucking duty and saves the Sandaime. And he spares the life of the attacker, knowing he’s bound by a seal, too.

 

Probably one that didn’t taste like chocolate though.

He looks after Kinoe, feeling weirdly akin.

 

 

That evening, the rice finally tastes like rice again.

 

Kakashi is so relieved he actually is able to sleep for once. 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Another day, another hunt of enemy ninjas. 

Another ribcage around his wrist. 

 

Is this all that life is for me now? What I am?

Kakashi grinds his teeth, the pain in his chest endless. A killer? On the Sandaime‘s beck and call?

 

Minato had called him into the Anbu to keep him close. And to guard Kushina.

And now… 

Now I‘m spoken for. 

 

And that is really ridiculous. 

I have to try to get out. 

 

He inhales deeply, resolve spreading through him. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“I don’t think I’m qualified to be in the Anbu.”

Any longer. Under you.

Kakashi doesn’t say it, swallowing the words down. 

The phantom sweet taste rises, mixing with the bitterness in his soul. 

 

Sarutobi’s voice is gravelly. “I wasn’t able to protect the Yondaime. I wouldn’t blame you if you hate me for that.”

Kakashi keeps his eyes closed, tries not to speak the words that want to spill out. 

I do. Heaven help me. 

The Hokage continues. “I had advised Minato for you to watch over Kushina because we wanted you to leave this pain behind… but right now, I am in great need of your strength. And your determination.”

And your ties to that child hangs in the air, unsaid.

Kakashi swallows, trying to breathe past the pain the words elicit, knowing his request is refused. “Yes, Hokage-sama.”

There’s real regret in the Hokage’s voice. “I just hope Minato will be able to forgive me as well.”

Another I hope you will forgive me, unsaid.

Kakashi frowns slightly, seriously doubting either, refusing to let his limbs shake. 

He changes the subject, keeps his tone light. “There’s a wood user in the Ne.”

The Sandaime nods, obviously grateful that Kakashi has dropped the subject. “Yes, and I have a good idea who this must be. Leave this situation to me. I’ll handle it.”

 

Kakashi inclines his head, in fatalistic acquiescence.

 

 

And cries, quietly. 

 

 

Later. 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The wood is sharp and cruel, digging into his limbs. 

Saving him.

 

The boy that seems to be his age or slightly younger is resolute, but his eyes are kind. Something in Kakashi unclenches, the tiniest bit. 

Something in him … reaches, feels kinship, feels… close. 

 

It’s why he gives in.

At least allows some doubt.

 

There’s more doubt, when the mist of the dying Iburi clan member fades, leaving him with the warning of Orochimaru’s experiments.

 

And of Orochimaru himself.

 

Kakashi follows the trail of breadcrumbs nonetheless, to find the proverbial witch.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The kunai rips through Kakashi’s mask, splitting it in half with a speed that leaves him stunned. And throws him down.

Orochimaru grins at him, with a sultry undertone, watching the hateful gaze Kakashi throws back over his shoulder.. “You… I like the look in your eyes.”

Kakashi looks back at him, trying to stay calm. He pushes up, raising his kunai. “Don’t move.”

Orochimaru laughs. “Or what, Hatake Kakashi.”

Kakashi blinks. “You know me.”

Orochimaru chuckles, his eyes sparkling. “I know of all the Leaf’s prodigies… and my Sensei’s little helpers.”

Kakashi hisses, pressing the words out. “I am not afraid of you.”

Orochimaru’s chuckle deepens, becomes more guttural. “You should be.” His tongue snakes out, licking along his lips. “Such an interesting eye you have there…”

Kakashi tightens his grip on the kunai. 

Orochimaru smiles sharply. “I wonder why Sensei Sarutobi did not allow you to use your eye to contain the nine-tails… I mean, I do know why he did not want to use the Uchiha, but you…”

He trails off and Kakashi wants to hiss, wants to reject, wants to yell, but he cannot, the lump in his throat preventing all speech. 

I… had not even thought about that.

Why… did you not use me, Hokage-sama.

 

A shiver of dread runs down his spine.

Or… why didn’t you, Sensei. 

Was one of your reasons to have me guard Kushina the fact that I could indeed subdue the nine-tails if all else failed?

But… then you sent me away because … why?

His throat is dry, the thought sending terror through his limbs.

Why did you send me away, give me a day off, Sensei.

 

Why.

 

He blinks rapidly, something clicking into place.

You would never have sent me away on the date of the birth… if you’d known.

You’d have never taken that risk.

 

What… happened?

 

Orochimaru tilts his head, his slitted eyes glittering. “Ah yes, you do realize that now, don’t you. I can see it in your face…”  He grins, viciously. “You realize that the oh so clever Yondaime would have never sent away his most trusted pupil, his dearest prodigy, the only left surviving member of his team… and the one who would be perfect to subdue the nine-tails in case something would happen during birth due to the precious little gift he got a while ago…” His tongue snakes out, licking his lips. “Except…”

Kakashi grimaces, silent, feeling dangerously close to hyperventilating and Orochimaru sighs, theatrically. “Except of course, someone hastened the birth by giving Kushina a parturifacient. Someone powerful enough to put the doctors under their genjutsu. To make them do their bidding.” He leans close, whispering. “Someone, who did not want you there for the birth, because they wanted to control the nine-tails themselves..”

 

Kakashi blinks, rapidly, trying to stay calm. He forces the word out. “Who.”

 

Oroshimaru grins at him, leaning forward a bit, with a repulsive little smile. And a weird tilt to his tone. “Don’t you know…?”

Kakashi stares at him, unable to comprehend, his stomach dropping, and bile in his throat.

Orochimaru sighs again, pulling himself up once more, obviously vaguely disappointed. “Ah well. You will come to know eventually, if you survive long enough.”

He chuckles to himself and tilts his head.

 

Kakashi shifts his stance, expecting him to attack but Orochimaru just looks past him for a moment, with a frown, before he looks back at Kakashi, his gaze lingering on Kakashi’s eyes once more. ”I can easily see the Hokage has lost your confidence though. Such a shame that you are bound to follow him regardless.”

Orochimaru’s gaze drops to the Anbu tattoo on Kakashi’s left upper arm. “And he didn’t even need to put that into the seal, did he, since you are marked for someone.” He chuckles again. “At some point at least.”

Kakashi blinks rapidly, knowing he should not let himself be triggered, but unable to help himself. “How… How do you know.”

Orochimaru quirks an eyebrow. “Of your seal? Ah, Kakashi, I have eyes and ears everywhere… and you didn’t exactly lock yourself away after he put it on you.”

Kakashi winces, realizing one of the Anbu he was with must’ve seen. Or smelt. 

And they told. 

He unclenches and clenches his fingers on the blade’s handle, his voice grim. “You really are well informed.” And I have to find a new way to eat, in case that seal ever flares up into visibility again.

Orochimaru chuckles again, throwing his long hair back with a flick of his hand. “Does he still use chocolate for the taste? That was my idea…” He laughs openly at the heated gaze Kakashi throws his way. 

A snake seems to uncoil from behind Orochimaru’s back, slowly, hypnotically. Kakashi tries to ignore the way it sways, concentrates on Orochimaru’s voice instead. “I will leave now, Hatake Kakashi. Why don’t we… forget about this little discussion. Trust me, it will be better that way.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, looking up at the snake, which is opening its mouth now. 

With a bomb seal inside.

 

Kakashi’s eyes widen. Why is there a bomb in Oroshimaru’s snake?

For a moment he can see Oroshimaru’s eyes do the same and then the explosion hits, throwing them both back. He gasps, trying to pull himself up again. 

That wasn’t strong enough to kill?

He raises his kunai again. “Don’t move.”

Orochimaru glowers at him and just steps past him and Kakashi wants to attack him, but he cannot, his body frozen in place. What?

 

Kakashi clenches his jaw, willing his limbs to respond but to no avail.

He blinks, his mind frozen.

 

What the hell is happening?

 

 

When he can finally move again the air shimmers for a moment, right before his eyes and suddenly he knows, watching the thin stream of fog cloud in front of his face and then disappear into the ground. The Iburi clan, of course.

Still trying to protect Orochimaru.

I will have to return to them, soon.

 

But.. why did they want to protect me though by placing that bomb into the snake?

 

He narrows his eyes and turns, jumping after the Sannin.

 

I… it must have been Kinoe. 

He must have asked them to.

 

 

 

Reciprocity.

I spared him, he spares me.

 

 

He exhales.

Something about it all makes him feel… better.

 

Just a bit.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In the evening he finds himself standing next to the little bed, in the corner of the orphanage. 

Far away from the other children. 

 

Three other children.

Three more full orphans, made that fateful night.

 

There’s a dusting of gold on Naruto’s head and the whiskers quiver as the small baby sleeps fitfully. Little sounds escape the little mouth, small wailing hurtful demands for love, for skin, for warmth, for … more.

 

Kakashi sinks down in the corner next to the bed, hiding his face behind his hands.

There’s a sob stuck in his throat, mixing viciously with the tears that fall, unstoppable.

 

The name on the little sign on the bed is the wrong one.

 

It is the wrong name.

 

Wrong.

 

 

Just wrong.

 

 

It’s ALL wrong.

 

 

 

Kakashi snarls, quietly, the world wavering. His fists clench.

 

Naruto starts to sniffle, as if sensing his turmoil, a small, desperate crying sound that hurts.

Kakashi shrinks into the shadows, expects someone to come, to calm him, to hug the crying baby to them and give him some comfort, even if it would only be to stop him from waking the other babies.

 

No-one comes.

The other children stay quiet, as if fearing the thing in the corner.

 

Kakashi watches, in rising horror, for long minutes. 

No-one comes. No-one cares.

 

Desperation and anger settle in his gut.

Resentment.

Disgust.

 

Fury.

 

 

 

 

The taste of sweet chocolate is heavy on his tongue.

 

 

 

 

 

He’s not sure when or why he offers his hand. 

 

Liar. 

 

Pushes it up and over the edge of the little bed.

 

 

Naruto’s small fingers latch onto his middle finger, as if grasping for a life-line.

Kakashi swallows, lowering his head onto his upper arm, propped up on his knees.

 

Slowly, the baby calms again, still sniffling. Small, gurgling sounds, that tug at Kakashi’s soul.

Naruto falls asleep eventually, still holding onto Kakashi’s fingers.

 

 

Kakashi watches the moon travel the night sky from the corner of his red eye and cries, guarding his destiny.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 3: Green goggles, orange soul

Notes:

I recently re-read the mangas, and it is noted that using the Reaper-of-Death-seal would lock the souls of the user in eternal war with Death, never to find peace. 

And now my head canon is that Naruto and Kakashi forgave Kabuto and Oroshimaru so… easily after the war, because the resurrection through Edo Tensei made it actually possible for those souls to enter ‘proper’ afterlife, finally. 

Especially Minato’s (and Hiruzen’s). 

I… bet that must have been a huge relief for them both.

Chapter Text

 

 

No-one ever says something about the dark rings under Kakashi’s eyes, hidden so elegantly by the mask he wears almost all the time now.

 

No-one ever mentions the extra shifts he puts in, guarding the village.

 

No-one ever comments on his following the little demon fox boy around, whenever the toddler escapes the orphanage’s gardens.

 

No-one dares.

 

 

Not even the Hokage.

 

Especially not the Hokage.

 

 

 

Up until the age of two the other children often play with Naruto. 

If the adults let them. 

 

They rarely do though.

 

Oftentimes Kakashi watches from the shadows as Naruto chases stones, butterflies and the sun on his own, sits in the corner of the playground and tries out the taste of grass and sand and petals. 

 

Sometimes, Kakashi covertly redirects Naruto’s attention, when he’s interested in something that could potentially be harmful.

 

In some rare instances, Kakashi grimly holds Naruto’s hands when he screams with nightmares.

 

Always he has to keep himself in check, feeling dangerously close to lashing out at his… caregivers. 

 

 

He takes that feeling to his missions instead.

The feeling of a warm, soft and yet jagged ribcage around his wrist is a constant these days.

The Sharingan makes it impossible to wash the blood off.

 

 

He’s building up a reputation.

 

He’s collecting sleepless nights, fraught with nightmares, too.

 

 

 

There’s no birthday cake for Naruto at the age of one, but there is a small one on his nightstand when he wakes on his second.

There are whispers, throughout the orphanage, drowned out by the excited cry of the little boy, clapping his hands. And ripping the paper off the package next to the cake.

 

 

Kakashi watches from afar as Naruto unwraps the green goggles with a happy little screech, wryly reminiscing that his own, sixteenth birthday a few weeks ago was celebrated in a similar, solitary manner. Sans cake.

And sans present.

 

The goggles had been bought on a whim, found on an assassination mission in the Land of Wind, in a cart of a street vendor they passed. They had stared at Kakashi, reminding him so much of Obito. 

Obito, who had made such a big thing of his eyes, always.

Obito, who had been such an… ass at times.

Obito, who had been Kakashi’s friend.

Who could have been more than that, maybe, if fate had taken a different turn.

 

Obito, who had given him a gift he couldn’t refuse.

That gift, that tears at him, drains him, constantly. That enables him to be this solitary avenger, this famed killer. This irreplaceable Anbu.

He could not not buy them.

 

He smiles softly behind his mask when the adjustable strap has to be folded in and backwards to make it small enough to actually fit Naruto’s little head. 

He’s given up feeling hatred towards the little boy, exhausted acceptance replacing it, fueled by the realization that he is, here and now, the only fucking person that cares. 

Kakashi wonders if he would, if he didn’t know.

Of course you would, baka. This is Minato’s and Kushina’s child after all.

 

Still.

It is different, knowing.

 

It is different knowing how soft the hair is, how soft the skin.

To see the smile, that he put there.

 

Sixteen is a bad, bad age to know he has to wait at least another 15 years to actually allow any feelings.

He wonders rather self-deprecatingly if he’ll make it.

Not that he has much choice.

 

There’s the sound of little running feet and Kakashi steps back from the window, watching Naruto barrel through the door next to it, the little feet a bit unsteady, arms spread.

A little orange flash, running towards the gardens, goggles pushed up onto his forehead.

Spreading his arms, embracing the world.

 

Kakashi shoots a look inside the house, narrowing his eyes once more at the caregivers, who don’t follow Naruto outside, but turn to the other children instead. Who don’t force him to wear a jacket, either.

Kakashi narrows his eyes, wondering why Naruto doesn’t get sick all the time, by sheer neglect. 

And why he is so set on orange, the color choice something he knows from conversation overheard that Naruto picked himself out of the clothes they put in front of him, whenever he can. 

 

At least the green does fit with it.

 

He smirks softly to himself.

And orange is the color of sunshine, so you’ll have that at least.

 

 

There is a displacement of air, and another Anbu, standing at his side. “Senpai, the Hokage has called for you.”

 

Kakashi inclines his head and they jump, leaving the little boy playing in the light rain on his own.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He feels the powerful presence before he enters, his heart beating in his throat.

 

The big Sannin is laughing, ferociously, the sake in his cup sloshing. 

The Sandaime nods at him as he enters, his voice calm. “Hatake Kakashi, please join us.”

 

Kakashi takes off his mask, lowers himself to his knees at a respectful distance between them. He sees Jiraiya look at him from the corner of his eyes. The Sannin’s voice is tinged with dark amusement, cutting right to the point. “So you are the soul-mate Minato seems to have chosen for Naruto.”

He takes a sip, watching as Kakashi tries to form an answer. His throat clicks when he answers, finally. “I believe a soul-mate is found, not chosen.”

Jiraiya hums, his expression loud somehow, though his eyes are sparkling rather slyly. “Is that so.”

Kakashi’s heart beats hard, twice. “It’s what I was told.”

Jiraiya hums again, turning back to the Hokage, who is watching them silently. Jiraiya’s words are still amused, but tinged with sadness. “Minato was always very apt at finding new jutsus and seals he could employ for certain… problems.”

The Hokage sighs. “I wish his contract with the God of Death would let the souls rest though. I feel the fate he chose with that jutsu is an unfairly cruel one.”

Kakashi frowns, feeling not in the mood for philosophical discussions, or having to think about the eternal damnation Minato put himself in, blurting out. “Jiraiya-sama. Whether fate or not, do you not wish to adopt him.” He raises his eyes to the Sannin. “I believe he is your godchild, is he not?”

 

Jiraiya turns his head again, his white hair shifting down his back. “He is. But… That is impossible, unfortunately.”

Kakashi grimaces, uncaring for his tone. “Why?”

Jiraiya glowers at him. “That is not for you to know.”

Kakashi sneers at him.

The Sandaime interjects holding up his hand. “I see emotions are running high. Please, Kakashi, rest assured that Jiraiya-sama’s missions are very important to the safety of the village.”

Kakashi blinks, looking back and forth, trying to find his balance again. His throat is dry. “The traveling to collect ideas for Jiraiya-sama’s books is only cover story?”

Jiraiya chortles, raising his drink at him. “Clever boy.” He grins, ferally. “Though I do enjoy myself of course.”

Kakashi scoffs, quietly. 

Jiraiya looks at him for a long moment, his eyes dark. “The death of Minato has led to many ninja’s believing the Leaf to be weakened, that they can attack. Let’s leave it at that.”

Kakashi looks down, somewhat shamed. I know. 

Jiraiya’s voice reaches him, a lot kinder. “But it is good to know Naruto is guarded by you. And that you care so much.”

Kakashi swallows, heavily. He presses the words out. “It’s not his fault.”

Jiraiya nods gravely. “No, it is not. And yet the weight of the event will rest on his shoulders, and he won’t even know why…” He sighs, weighing his head. “And only time will tell whether the seal Minato used to capture the nine-tails will help or hinder.” He looks sharply at Kakashi. “I believe that you are one of the few people to have spent the most time with him, sadly enough. Has he emitted any signs of being able to tap into the nine-tails’ power?”

Kakashi blinks, thinking of the fact that Naruto never seems to get sick. If they have any reason to think the nine-tails has any kind of influence on him… He quirks an eyebrow. “No.”

Jiraiya looks at him for a long moment, with a smirk tugging at his mouth. And then he turns away, his tone dry. “Very good.”

Kakashi swallows, not daring to look at the Hokage.

 

There is a pause and then Kakashi just has to ask, trying to keep his tone neutral. “So what will happen with him now? Will he be set up for adoption?”

Sarutobi Hiruzen sighs, heavily. “He has been up for adoption for a while now. And while, as you know, some of the other newly born children have been adopted, no-one wishes to have him. Unfortunately even the orphanage wishes for him to live somewhere else, I have been discussing Naruto’s status with them several times already.”

Kakashi blinks, his tone incredulous. “The boy just turned two, and they want to turn him out?”

The Sandaime sighs. “I have negotiated with them for another year. After that…” He sighs again, shooting a look at Kakashi. “I am looking for landlords willing to lend an apartment to him, when he is three.”

Kakashi blinks, his voice a whisper, colored by the dread in his gut. “You want to set him out to live alone by the age of three? Even I was older than that.”

The Hokage sighs again, looking very old suddenly. “I will personally try to make the time and check on him, whenever I can, that I promise.”

Kakashi huffs, unbelievingly. He pinches the bridge of his nose, feeling a massive headache coming on. He shakes his head. “Forget it. I’ll take him.”

He can see Jiraiya raise his head a bit, but it is the Sandaime who answers. “No.”

Kakashi grimaces fiercely, really not caring for decorum anymore. “Why.”

 

The Sandaime’s voice is soft, but firm, brooking no argument. “You are too important to lose as Anbu. The frictions with the Uchiha-faction are rising constantly, even apart from all the other threats the Leaf experiences and you are the only wielder of a Sharingan outside the clan.”

Kakashi blinks, his red eye burning. Throbbing.

The big Sannin raises his cup at him once more, his tone dark. “But you can keep protecting him I’d wager. Isn’t that correct, Sensei.”

The Sandaime shoots him a look, and Kakashi watches as the Sannin holds the gaze, unrelentingly. Finally the Hokage sighs, nodding once. “If you do not neglect your duties, I would appreciate it if you did.”

Jiraiya smiles softy, cruelly. “It could even be a part of his duties, could it not. Watching the village’s Jinchuriki. He watched over Kushina as well, so why shouldn’t he watch over Naruto now?”

The Sandaime glowers at him, but sighs again, a bit irritatedly. “Yes.” He closes his eyes for a moment before gazing heavily at Kakashi. “Very well. Hatake Kakashi, it will be your duty to watch over the Leaf’s Jinchuriki whenever your other duties allow it.” Kakashi opens his mouth, but the Sandaime holds up his hand. “But, you will do so from afar.”

Kakashi’s mouth snaps shut. He swallows, pressing the words out. “You are afraid I would find a way to bypass the seal and tell him the truth.”

Jiraiya interjects, his tone flat. “You put a seal on him, Sensei?”

Sarutobi sighs once more. “I felt, given the time aspect of the whole situation, that it would be wise, yes.”

Jiraiya scoffs, derision in his tone. “Do you not think that Minato in all likelihood knew what he was doing?”

Ice runs down Kakashi’s spine, watching the Hokage glower at his pupil. He swallows, trying to keep his composure.

The Sandaime’s voice is almost cold. “Be that as it may, I decided to not take that chance.”

Jiraiya issues a tone that could be a snort. Almost. Kakashi kind of admirers him for it. The Sannin drains his cup, before raising his eyebrows, his tone light once more. “You did not seal his ability to speak to me I take it.”

The Hokage shakes his head, his tone clipped. “No.”

Jiraiya nods, putting down his cup. He reaches over, gently clasping Kakashi’s shoulder. He smiles, a shit-eating, big, fake smile, his voice thundering once more. “Very well, Hatake Kakashi. Let us go for dinner then, and talk.”

 

He gets up and Kakashi gets up after a quick look for confirmation at the Hokage, feeling somewhat drained and weary of whatever may be coming up. 

The Sandaime looks up at them, his tone dry. “Remember Jiraiya, Kakashi-san is not of age yet.” 

Jiraiya looks down at him with dark, glittering eyes. “Not of age? For what exactly.” And he turns and walks out and Kakashi follows after a moment, feeling dangerously close to crying suddenly.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The little restaurant Jiraiya drags him to barely deserves the name, the space shady and small and not something Kakashi would usually put a foot in.

The owner seems to know Jiraiya though, and they are led into a small back room for themselves, the sake appearing on their table immediately. Jiraiya exhales and rubs his hands, reaching out to pour for them both before Kakashi can do so, obviously not caring too much about decorum. 

 

Kakashi’s throat clicks as he speaks. “As… the Sandaime has said, I am not of age to drink yet.”

Jiraiya just scoffs, pushing the small glass over. “You are of age to live alone, and to kill for this village. You are of age to drink, believe me.”

Kakashi grimaces, watching the twisted reflection of his left eye mirrored in the glass. 

Jiraiya watches him for a moment, before raising his own glass. “Suit yourself though, I won’t force you.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, toying with his glass. 

Jiraiya raises his own, and then downs his glass, with a sigh. “I take it Hiruzen forced the seal on you? Did I interpret that correctly?”

Kakashi looks away for a moment. “I did not wish to follow his wishes to not tell Naruto.”

Jiraiya hums, tapping his glass twice before reaching for the bottle and refilling it. “And you are sure the bond has activated.”

Kakashi’s voice is raw. “The line appeared the night the nine-tails attacked. When I… when I was finally able to reach them, the seal around Naruto’s navel darkened to black immediately. With a tickling… and tingling sensation spreading from my own tattoo.”

Jiraiya looks at him for a long moment, and then touches Kakashi’s tattoo, with a frown. There is a moment when Kakashi thinks he‘ll say something, but he just nods, and then shrugs, with a sigh. “You are in deep shit, Hatake Kakashi.”

Kakashi snorts, unable to help himself.

Jiraiya grins at him, wryly. “I see there is some humor left under that… usually double mask.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, shooting him a look, somewhat… soothed by this astute statement. He reaches for the sake, looking at it for a long moment. When he speaks he sounds much older than his sixteen years. “Sometimes, that is all that is left, isn’t it.”

Jiraiya smiles at him, a true, soft smile for once. “It is.” He toasts Kakashi again, and then downs the sake once more, sighing happily. Kakashi looks at the light’s reflections in the liquid’s surface of his own glass. 

Jiraiya taps his finger on the table, twice again, his expression somewhat shuttered. “You were Minato’s famed pupil, the prodigy of this generation. The prodigy after Minato.”

Kakashi shrugs lightly, this not something new after all. Jiraiya continues, his voice softening. “He expected you to become Hokage after him.”

Kakashi’s eyes snap up. “What?” 

Jiraiya grins at him. “Don’t you expect me to visit my pupils when I can? Talk to them?” 

Kakashi quirks a smile, looking down. He shakes his head, once. “No, I know you did. We… never met at their home, but I know you visited from time to time.” He swallows. “But he…” He trails off, feeling stupid. Of course Minato would have wanted me to follow his footsteps. 

The words leave his mouth, impossible to be contained. “I miss them.”

 

Jiraiya seems to deflate somewhat, re-pouring his glass. “So do I.”

This time, Kakashi drinks with him, through his mask. The alcohol burns down his throat, making him cough, and he grimaces in disgust at the taste. And the fact that the smell stays, since his mask is now wet.

Jiraiya drily refills their glasses. “I was simply not able to come back then, in case you’re wondering, I was training at Mount Myōboku.” He pauses for a moment. “You have a contract with nin-ken?”

Kakashi nods, toying with his glass once more. “Yes. They are good for tracking.” 

Jiraiya watches him for a moment. “And for company.”

Kakashi averts his gaze. 

Jiraiya’s voice is low, laced with understanding. “It must be a daunting prospect to know you’ll have to wait for another … what is it… at least 15 years before you can fulfill the bond, in all likelihood.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he scoffs, still looking away. 

Jiraiya continues, his voice somewhat more neutral once more. “You know that you don’t have to stay celibate through that time, do you. I wouldn’t blame you if you did not.”

Kakashi blushes, really, really glad for his mask. He clears his throat, shrugging once. “I guess. Though it really isn’t something that’s…” Not really something that has mattered. Yet.

Jiraiya shrugs, pushing the subject. “And it’s not something you desired before, isn’t it.”

Kakashi’s blush deepens, and he feels the tips of his ears burn. He shrugs again, unable to look up. 

Jiraiya leans forward, his tone low. “Is the fact that Naruto is a boy good or bad for you.”

Kakashi freezes, feeling pinned, his throat dry. He swallows several times, his mind frantic, before stammering. “I… err… I don’t …. know.”

Jiraiya narrows his eyes and then draws back, with a chuckle. “Good.”

Kakashi looks at him then, a bit wild. “Good?”

Jiraiya grins. “Yes.” He laughs and then waves a hand at Kakashi. “You’ll realize at some point that it is indeed good that you don’t really care.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away again. 

 

They fall silent for a moment when food arrives, a mix of soups and vegetable platters, and Jiraiya rubs his hands, his eyes sparkling. “Dig in, Hatake Kakashi. You’ll need your strength.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, putting away his glass. “For what?”

Jiraiya reaches for one of the soup bowls. “For the years to come.” He looks at Kakashi over the rim of the bowl. “I expect you to protect my godchild after all.”

Kakashi swallows, reaching for his own bowl. He hesitates and then pulls down his mask, slowly. When he looks up, Jiraiya’s eyes are lowered, giving him privacy. Something in Kakashi unclenches. 

Jiraiya’s voice is low. “We all have our quirks and the darkness that swirls in us.” His tone changes slightly, an echo of hurt in it, threaded through the forced happiness. “Life is rarely fair, and we miss those that leave us, desperately.” He smiles painfully and Kakashi watches him, silently. “Sometimes we need to leave those we love. Sometimes we need to lay our life on the line, and never fulfill our destiny.” He takes a sip and Kakashi follows suit, conversely relaxing another fraction at the honest words. Jiraiya continues, his tone earnest now. “Minato and Kushina both spoke highly of you. I know Kushina trained with you, and I know you went onto missions with Minato. I know they both loved you for who you are, too.”

He pauses and Kakashi tries to blink away the tears, to no use. He sniffs, and Jiraiya continues, very gently now. “Whether you may have wished for this fate or not, you are the best thing that could possibly have happened to Naruto.”

 

Kakashi looks away, wipes angrily at his eyes, and then puts his bowl away, pulling up his mask once more.

Jiraiya hesitates and then sighs, looking back up at Kakashi. “We will share the burden of his life, Kakashi. Or, better, I will try to share the responsibility, if and when I’m able to.” 

Kakashi nods, silently. 

Jiraiya nods too, and then reaches into his pouch and pulls out a book. His tone is dry. “I will tell you why I had to leave, at some point. For now, why don’t you reap the benefits of my… research. I think you’ve earned it.”

He puts the book on the table and pushes it over. 

Kakashi looks down at it, swallowing past the constriction in his throat. “What is it?”

Jiraiya grins at him, wolfishly. “My first book. Icha Icha Paradise.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, feeling the tip of his ears burn again. “Icha Icha… Paradise?”

Jiraiya chuckles, leaning back in his seat. “Yes. See it as a reward for your… efforts.”

Kakashi frowns down at the small book, not understanding. “Reward?”

Jiraiya grins, rather saucily. “You might want to read it at home, at least at first.” He chuckles. “Given your situation, I promise I’ll write more for you if you like it?”

Something clicks and Kakashi blushes again, heavily, shifting in his seat. He hesitates, and then inclines his head in thanks, not trusting his voice.

Jiraiya chuckles at him, looking down once more and pointing with his chopsticks. “Eat a bit more, Kakashi. If you put a burst of chakra into the movement, you can more or less keep your mask on.”

Kakashi swallows and puts the book away, doing as he is told, grateful for the idea.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Later that night, he reads the first chapter, unable to withstand the temptation.

It’s as… raunchy as he expects it to be, but also helplessly romantic and daringly explicit and he falls down on the bed, feeling hot and cold and weird, and it’s heaven to use the images the story put in his brain when he touches himself, eventually. 

 

Morning comes with the feeling of not being that alone anymore.

Of being understood.

Maybe.

 

 

 

He puts the book in his pouch and leaves his apartment to fulfill his duties.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 4: Scales, silver like your hair

Notes:

I know the talking is a bit much for the age, but it’s that way in the anime as well, so I’m … trying :)

Chapter Text

 

Kakashi trails the Sandaime, quietly. 

 

He watches from afar as the Hokage spends time with Naruto, as promised, laughing and eating mushroom soup. Not glancing towards Kakashi, though Kakashi knows that Sarutobi Hiruzen knows he’s there. Of course.

 

When Hiruzen only picks the poisonous ones out from his own dish Kakashi also knows that the Hokage knows that some of the nine-tails‘… influence is active in Naruto. 

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, silently praying he won‘t do anything about it. 

Won’t lock the little boy up.

Won’t order to have him… killed.

 

What would I do then, if he would?

 

 

He’s actually glad when Naruto is back, alone in his apartment, later on. For once.

 

It helps that Naruto isn’t crying himself to sleep regularly anymore.

Resigned acceptance has replaced that part of the day.

 

Kakashi watches from afar as Naruto hugs his pillow now, close to falling into an exhausted sleep, keeping it in a death grip. He doesn’t turn when there is a displacement of air, the white of the Hokage’s hat just visible from the corner of his eye, simply inclines his head. “Sandaime-sama.”

 

Hiruzen sighs softly, through his nose. “The boy is quite meddlesome. He’s trying desperately for attention, which was to be expected. There is an innocence about him that I find inviting though. But he lacks social skills.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he rolls his eyes, glad for the mask covering his face. Well, of course.

The Hokage continues, his voice lowering so only Kakashi can hear, the other Anbu protecting him from a respectful distance. “Therefore you have my permission to engage in… direct communication from time to time. Teach him a few things. But do not reveal yourself.”

Kakashi tilts his head, his tone dry. “Reveal myself?”

Hiruzen gazes at him, quietly. “Do not unmask.”

Kakashi blinks. “Why, if I may ask, Hokage-sama?”

Sarutobi Hiruzen looks at him for a long moment, his voice gravelly when he finally speaks. “Time will tell. You are 17 now, are you not?”

Kakashi nods, once. 

The Hokage nods as well, looking over the roofs of Konoha and at the moon for a moment. He turns away, repeating his order. “Do not reveal yourself.”

And he is gone, leaving Kakashi to stare after him, wrecking his brain for the why.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He needs four tries to make himself engage the little boy, after three years of hiding himself.

 

I’m still hiding myself, doubly so, even.

 

Still.

 

He holds up his hand and waves when he can finally make himself step out of the shadows, trying to diffuse any fear the little blond boy might have felt at his sudden appearance by sheer will.

 

He swallows, the gaze in those bright blue eyes so brutally close to Minato’s.

Sensei, I miss you so.

 

He steps closer, carefully lowering himself into a crouch next to the orange-clad… child.

He’s almost a toddler still, just old enough to use the bathroom himself and get something from the fridge.

 

Kakashi refuses to let the pain rise, focuses on keeping an unthreatening composure instead. He keeps his voice soft. “Hello, Naruto.”

Naruto blinks up at him, mouth open, his golden hair fluttering in the soft breeze. “Who are you?”

Kakashi tilts his head. “A friend.”

Naruto blinks at him again. “A friend?”

Kakashi nods once, trying to keep his tone light. “Yeah, if you’d like?”

Naruto’s whole expression lights up, like the sun behind him. “Yes!” He holds up a small pebble, which glints in the afternoon sun. “This is for you - it’s a treasure.”

Kakashi chuckles, trying to breathe past the pain in his chest, while standing up slowly. “That is awfully nice of you, thank you.” He reaches for the small stone. “Is it a special stone?”

Naruto grins at him. “It’s shiny.”

Kakashi chuckles again, feeling a bit lighter. “Indeed.” He holds it up to the sun, watching the quartz in it sparkle. “That is a beautiful gift, thank you Naruto.”

The little boy ducks his head and fumbles with his pant pockets for a moment, and then pulls out some more pebbles in his little fist, tongue sticking out in concentration. “I have… more.” He pulls the fist out, holding it up and unfolds it carefully.

Kakashi bends down and hums, nodding his head in appreciation. “Oh yes, I see. Good work collecting all these… gems.” He grins to himself, and reaches out to ruffle Naruto’s hair, before thinking about it. He freezes for a split second when his fingers actually touch it, his heart stuttering, no familiarities, baka, you are a stranger to him, and then forces himself to continue, to not make this… weird. Or weirder.

Naruto preens, uncaringly, staring up at his mask. He blinks, the blue eyes huge. “What is that mask?”

Kakashi hesitates, slowly, withdrawing his fingers. Like unruly gold, spun from the sun. Bright and slightly wavy like his, and strong like hers. He swallows, his voice a bit rough. “It’s my Anbu mask. It depicts a dog.”

Naruto’s eyes light up even more. “A dog? Do you have one?”

Kakashi chuckles again, helplessly disarmed by the radiant energy the boy exudes. “No, I … sometimes summon some nin-ken, but I do not have a pet. Sorry.”

Naruto sighs, very put on. “Oh alright.”

Kakashi smiles behind his mask. “You like dogs?”

Naruto shrugs. “I kinda like all animals. They’re nice to me. Dogs too of course, at least when people don’t send them after me.”

Kakashi’s heart stutters, for a moment. His tone grows cold. “People send them after you?”

Naruto shrugs, looking away. “Sometimes.” He looks back up, a brave smile on his little face. “But I’m always faster!”

“Uh huh.” Kakashi feels constipated with hatred, directed at everyone. He tries to swallow past it, tries to keep his voice level. “Anyone specific?”

Naruto shrugs again, shuffling on his feet, obviously not wanting to dwell on it. “Not really.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment. “Will you tell me if and when there is someone… specific?”

Naruto rolls his eyes, the shadow of Obito’s memory mixing with Kakashi’s vision and painting the goggles blue for a second before they return to green. “Sure.” His eyes brighten up again, with a huge smile. “That means you’ll come back and play with me again at some point?”

 

Kakashi inhales deeply and then checks the sun’s position. “I will. Sometimes, though I cannot say when. But I can stay a little bit longer now. Would you like me to teach you how to fish?”

Naruto claps his hands, with a little cry. “Oh yes, please.” 

Some of the pebbles fall from his fist and Kakashi bends down to help him collect them again, smiling at the annoyed huff. “Here, put them away carefully now, you’ll need your hands for fishing.”

He pulls some string out of his pocket, fastening the lure he brought to it. 

Naruto stares at it, and reaches out, his little finger running along the bright feather decorating it. “That’s pretty.”

Kakashi hums. “It is. It is supposed to catch the fish’s attention, hopefully make it think it’s a fly. When it bites, you can then pull the fish out with a hook.”

Naruto blinks at the lure, his index finger gliding to the pointed tip. “Will it hurt it?”

Kakashi grimaces behind his mask, deflecting. “We’ll pull it out and then kill it real fast and I’ll show you how to grill it. Fish is very tasty. Did you have fish yet?”

Naruto shakes his head, watching as Kakshi fastens the knots. “There. Why don’t I show you how to throw it out, and then next time, we can prepare a real fishing-rod, hmm?”

Naruto nods enthusiastically.

Kakashi smiles to himself, stepping up to the little river’s edge slowly. He steps over to the shadows beneath a tree, indicating his mask. “It’s better if I hide in the shadows a bit, we don’t want to scare the fishes away, do we?”

Naruto hurries after him, flopping down next to his feet. “Why don’t you take it off?”

Kakashi smiles a bit bitterly behind his mask. “I cannot. I am on duty, in a way.”

Naruto blinks up at him. “On duty?”

Kakashi shakes his head once, and then redirects Naruto’s attention by throwing out the line. It lands in the water with a little splash, and Kakashi crouches down, his voice lowering. “Now we wait.”

Naruto tilts his head, shooting him a look. “For how long?”

Kakashi shrugs. “For how long it takes.”

Naruto groans, falling back and stretching out on the grassy floor. “That is boooooring.”

Kakashi grins, the expression shattering as he sees that Naruto’s shirt and jacket have ridden up, allowing a glimpse at the black seal around his navel. He clears his throat, averting his gaze. 

Why… is it active?

 

They are silent for long minutes, and Kakashi opens his mouth to alert Naruto when he feels the tug on the line, only to look over and find Naruto asleep, little mouth open and face relaxed.

Kakashi’s heart cramps and he swallows, getting up silently to pull the fish out. He debates letting it go but kills and guts it instead, cleaning it afterwards. He returns to the sleeping boy and hesitates for a long moment, watching the sun touch the horizon.

And then he sighs, with an annoyed huff and scoops the boy up with his left arm, taking him back to his shoddy apartment with long, gentle jumps.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

“What is that smell?”

 

Kakashi turns, spatula in hand, and smiles at the boy, silently cursing the Anbu mask. He tries to inflect his voice with humor instead. “Well, the fish of course.”

Naruto rubs his eyes with his little fists, his hair sticking up. He stumbles over and Kakashi pulls down the pan to show him the fried fish. 

Naruto looks down at the frying fish, some of the skin yet untouched by the heat. He yawns. “The fish is silver, like your hair.”

Kakashi blinks, somewhat floored by the statement. And by the emotions it triggers, deep within him. He tries to breathe past the sudden pain, the sudden longing. Why does this resonate so strongly with me? That’s just stupid. “Err, yes, a fish normally has scales, too, but they’re inedible so I had to scratch them off. This fish’s skin is silvery beneath, that’s true. There are other fishes as well though, with different colors.”

He puts the pan back up onto the stove, pointing to the little heap of scales next to the sink. “See? I’ll clean them up, but I wanted to show them to you.”

Naruto yawns again, stumbling over. He picks at the scales, holds up a small, relatively intact one. “They’re shiny, too.”

Kakashi smiles softly, still fighting to keep his emotions in check. “They are. But you shouldn’t keep them, they’re too small and will only scatter around your place.”

Naruto hums, pulling a face and putting it away again. He climbs onto his chair, looks at the way the table is set for him. He pushes at the plate. “I don’t usually use plates.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, turning the fish. “You don’t?”

Naruto shrugs, toying with the sticks. “I mostly eat cup ramen. They’re tasty!”

Kakashi looks at him, blinking. “I see.” He lets the fried fish glide onto the plate. “That explains why there’s no fresh vegetables in your fridge.” 

Naruto sticks out his tongue. “Vegetables taste yucky.”

Kakashi snorts behind his mask, very quietly. “No they don’t. You have to season them a bit.”

Naruto pulls a face, looking down dubiously at the fish. He looks up at Kakashi, the blue eyes pleading. “And this tastes good?”

Kakashi inclines his head. “It does.” He hesitates and then reaches out and ruffles the hair again. “Trust me, Naruto.” He nods at the fish. “Eat. And mind the fishbones.” 

Naruto hesitates. “Fishbones?” 

Kakashi puts the pan away. “Yeah, they’re small and pointy. So be careful not to swallow them. Throw them away later.”

Naruto sighs, picking up a tiny morsel of fried fish with his sticks. He puts it into his mouth and starts chewing cautiously, his face clearing up immediately. “Oh this is tasty!”

Kakashi chuckles. “I’m glad.” His smile turns wistful for a moment. “I used to make fish dishes for myself a lot and sometimes for my friends, too. They used to come over and eat with me.”

Naruto shoots him a look. “Do you eat fish with them often?”

Kakashi hesitates, suddenly glad for the mask. “No, not … anymore. I did when I was younger.” When I was left alone, just like you are now. I got a new family, for a while. He swallows. “It’s very healthy.”

Naruto hums, carefully pulling off a piece and putting it into his mouth. He talks, while chewing. “Thank you…” He frowns. “What is your name?”

Kakashi hesitates. He bites his lip, wrecking his brain. “You can call me Sukea.”

Naruto grins at him, his happy little voice ringing out, uncaringly. “I love having you as my friend Sukea! Please stay!”

 

Kakashi blinks at him, something in him breaking, the pain devastatingly pure. 

He reaches out, with a trembling hand, puts it onto Naruto’s head for just a moment, his voice raw. “I need to go. I… will be back, I promise.”

And he’s gone, through the window, not daring to look back.

Not daring to analyze his feelings either.

 

Praying Naruto won’t choke on a fishbone tonight.

 

And that the little boy will forgive him.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He looks at the seal, watching it flare up. 

The explosion throws him back, and his neck prickles, recognizing the other person there on instinct alone. “Kinoe.”

The wood yielder inclines his head, silently. 

Kakashi keeps his back turned to him, deliberately. “What are you doing here?”

Kinoe shrugs minutely. “I’m on a mission.”

A mission… “Did Lord Danzo dispatch a Ne Shinobi because he’s interested in Orochimaru’s facility?”

Kinoe doesn’t answer. So… that’s a ‘no’ then. A tickle of unease settles in Kakashi’s gut. He watches the mask, and feels like the invisible gaze is somehow locked to his hidden one. Is that it? Does… Danzo want the eye?

He sighs, deciding to pretend he doesn’t care. “Ne Shinobi never discuss their mission… right?” He looks down and then back up, giving Kinoe an eye-smile. “No matter. You helped me out there, then.” He hesitates, scratching his head in a deliberately nonchalant and unthreatening way. “Do you… want to investigate what’s inside together?”

He spreads out his arms when there is still no reaction. “Whatever we find, we’ll share the intel with each other.” Yeah, fat chance, I know. 

The masked face tilts up. “Yes… who knows if a demon or a snake will appear? Let’s go together.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. Alright. “Right.” He deliberately turns his back. If you are after me, then lets get this over with. “The only trap seems to be the one near the entrance.” He starts down the corridor, and there is the silent impression of a kunai being drawn and Kakashi shifts his attention, but then there is a sound behind a door and they jump to each side of it. Kakashi looks into the room with a small mirror, 

It’s just a room, with a table and cupboards. 

Kakashi glides into it, starts looking around. When he turns he finds Kinoe staring down at the table, unmoving. Kakashi narrows his eyes. I guess he really is one of those babies… this must awaken memories. Out loud he keeps his voice kind. “Hey, Kinoe.”

Kinoe’s head comes up. “Right.”

Kakashi leaves the room, once more turning his back, deliberately. Make up your mind, Kinoe.

 

He watches as Kinoe opens the next, locked door with a homegrown key, deciding to address the elephant in the room. “That jutsu went extinct in the Hidden Leaf Village ages ago.” He quirks an eyebrow below his mask, trying to keep the vague humor from his voice. “So how did you learn it?” 

Kinoe enters the lab, not answering, putting some space between himself and Kakashi. 

Kakashi continues, pressing the point. “Are you aware that this kind of jutsu is extremely important to the Hidden Leaf?”

Kinoe speaks after a moment, sounding a bit pressed. “I didn’t know that.”

Kakashi wants to snort, keeping his voice light. “The Wood Style jutsu is one of the powers that can control the Nine Tails.” But you know that. “Your Wood Style jutsu isn’t just for the Ne…” Kakashi walks over to some glass bottles, watches the room through the reflection. “It is a power meant to serve all of Hidden Leaf Village.” Kinoe turns to him, watches him, silently. 

Kakashi turns away, once more turning his back. “Don’t you want to leave the Ne and come out of the shadows?” Becoming an Anbu is still very far away from the light though, isn’t it. He keeps that thought to himself.

And then it happens, the thin sound of a kunai slicing through the air making the hair on Kakashi’s head stand up. He whirls around, deflecting it with his sword, jumping back from Kinoe. “Kinoe!”

A beam of wood breaks from the floor, hitting him square into the chest and throwing him against the wall. Kakashi pushes his hitai-ate up, revealing his Sharingan and Kinoe hides his eyes behind his arm, making Kakashi grimace. They both hide, and Kakashi drily pulls out a bandage to still the bleeding from the shallow cut he received. He knows how to fight against my Sharingan. This was his intent from the beginning. 

He exhales silently, calling into the room. “If you’re serious about killing me then I won’t hold back.” I cannot. I have… a destiny to fulfill. And isn’t that funny.

 

Kinoe’s voice comes, quietly. “I’m serious.”

A shame. Kakashi uses the doppelgänger and displacement jutsu, watching from the shadows as his clone is trapped and stabbed, rather matter of factly. He steps forward, pressing the tip of the kunai into Kinoe’s jugular. One false move. “Why do you want to kill me?” 

Kinoe uses a substitute jutsu, his voice calling out hollowly. “You’re the one who killed a friend.”

Ah. Kakashi swallows, harshly. So that is how they made you believe it would be alright to kill me. The attack comes from behind him, as anticipated. He deflects it, jumping away. Smiling to himself “You’ve gotten better since last time.” 

Kinoe holds out his sword. “Yes. So don’t hold back, Kakashi.”

And he’s there, attacking viciously. Kakashi deflects each blow, not easily, but surely, trying to reach him with words instead. “Stop Kinoe. Abandon this mission.”

Kinoe screams at him. “A Shinobi’s mission is absolute.” He throws another beam of wood at Kakashi, throwing him back. 

Kakashi cuts the tip off with his sword, throws a kunai at Kinoe. He decides to take a chance, to remember Kinoe of the trust they’d built on reciprocity. Friend may be stretching it, but… “If your orders are to kill a friend, then those orders are wrong!”

Kinoe hesitates, obviously thinking. And then he rushes at Kakashi their swords meeting with a loud clang. “I will fulfill my mission!”

Kakashi snorts, darkly, throwing a shuriken. “To hell with your mission.”

Kinoe hurls the words at him, like weapons. “Then why did you kill her?” He emphasizes the question with a jab of his sword and Kakashi is momentarily floored, his ‘what’ drowned under the metal clangs. 

Wood throws him back once more and he is encaged suddenly, grimly raising his fist and letting lightning coil and then explode around himself, destroying the cage.

Pitch black rage comes with the electricity running through him, the abyss of self-hatred and fury reopening once more. He charges at Kinoe, yelling over the singing lighting. “As part of my Anbu missions, I’ve had to deal with Rogue ninjas and traitors of the Hidden Leaf. Rin was…”

He cannot finish, the words stuck in his throat. He curses at Kinoe, running towards him and simply destroying all wood in his patch. “Why you…” Little fucking asshole. You know nothing, do you. He’s yelling now. “I didn’t want to kill her.”

He throws Kinoe down, the Chidori raised, ready to punch through flesh once more. He stays there for a long moment, letting Kinoe hear the breaking of his voice. “I couldn’t protect my friend.” A sob is stuck somewhere, swallowing the words. “That’s why Rin died…” I…. 

Kinoe echoes him, quietly. “Couldn’t protect her.” His words drop to a whisper. “I’m not a traitor.”

Kakashi sneers at him, his words rushed, brooking no argument. “Then Kinoe, renounce your duty to Ne. I will take you into custody and bring you to Hokage-sama.”

Kinoe’s answer is almost inaudible. “Do as you please.”

 

There is a resignation in the words that is terrible.

Speaking of a world of hurt and abuse. 

A world Kakashi knows certain dark corners of as well.

 

Kakashi lets the lightning flare out, hiding his sigh of relief when the boy beneath him stays limp. He climbs off him, quietly pushing Kinoe into a sitting position and binds his hands behind his back. 

Kinoe’s voice is soft, without inflection. “What about the mission?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Stand up.” He waits until Kinoe stands, before continuing. “It’s on standby, because of you.”

Kinoe’s voice is low. “Don’t let me stop you.”

Oh please. Kakashi looks at Kinoe, with a half amused, half annoyed gaze. “You tried to kill me, so stop joking around.”

He starts walking, pushing Kinoe gently to walk before him. “I hear Ne agents are all trained to discard their emotions.” He looks at the boy in front of him, walking quietly. “Well, you failed your mission.” And partly because you pissed me off so badly with those remarks, too. 

 

Suddenly he gets goosebumps all over and there’s a weird sensation at the back of his neck. He turns, and holds out his hand, keeping Kinoe back. “Don’t move.”

He walks forward, kunai in hand, hearing Kinoe’s exclamation as several snakes corner him. Kakashi wants to help him, but a huge snake head raises in front, looming over him. Attacking him. Wanting to separate him from Kinoe. 

He vanishes in smoke, materializing next to Kinoe. “These aren’t ordinary snakes. They’re Orochimaru’s experiments.”

But… why does Orochimaru attack us? Why doesn’t he just leave? Why… now? 

Why does he try to separate us?

The big snake head spits snakes at them and Kakashi fights them off, but his kunai does not deal any damage and he’s separated from Kinoe, after all. 

 

Kinoe, who is swallowed by the big snake. 

In one big gulp, fangs carefully to both sides.

 

Kakashi stares, trying to understand. He met him at the Ibure clan. He saw him use the wood style there. And now… he tried to…  kidnap him? Does he … want the jutsu as well? For what purpose?

 

Chidori flares back up in his right hand and he charges at the snake, putting his remaining chakra into speed, aiming behind the lump that he thinks is Kinoe. 

 

The snake explodes in a rain of singed flesh, glittering silver scales and blood and tissue, and Kakashi grits his teeth, hoping he has calculated correctly, and not hit the body inside.

A flash of silver catches his eye, and longing pangs through him, carried on a memory. 

‘Silver, like your hair!’

 

He closes his eyes for a split second, silently vowing he’ll go and visit Naruto again, and soon.

 

He holds his breath when he digs through the snake’s remains, grimacing, something in him relaxing only when he hears a cough. He drags the boy out, wincing at the blood and slobber everywhere. “Are you alright, Kinoe?”

Kinoe nods, his voice rough. “I think so…” There is a pause. “But why?”

Kakashi frowns, not sure what he’s getting at. If he’s realized. “Why what.”

Kinoe watches silently as Kakashi reaches for the bonds on his hands. “Why did you save me.”

Kakashi exhales, frowning and wondering if he should mention that Kinoe was almost abducted, but then decides against it. “I don’t leave friends behind.”

Kinoe’s voice is low. “But even if you had - I would have deserved it.” Kinoe turns to the severed snake head, the fangs glinting in the low light. “I … did not want to die.”

Kakashi frowns, seriously doubting he would have, but deciding on a neutral response. “Then be thankful you’re alive.”

 

Steam raises and Kakashi starts, holding up his hand. “Don’t inhale! That’s poisonous! Run!”

He turns and follows Kinoe, shoving the boy in front of him, the action making him the half-second to late. 

Dizziness settles in his mind, his legs suddenly a lead weight. Oh no. Please, no. I can’t die here, now.

Dimly he hears Kinoe call to him. “Kakashi!” And then arms pick him up and he’s dragged out, his vision wavering. Kinoe puts him into a seating position somewhere close to the entrance, jabs a needle into his leg. The dizziness fades somewhat, but with it comes the black relief of unconsciousness, carried on dread, his thoughts swirling.

Obito. I am sorry. I guess I cannot keep your present after all. And Naruto, I….

 

 

 

 

He wakes with a start, his heart thundering with the realization that he is still alive, not understanding for long moments. He grimly reads the little note Kinoe left him there, forcing himself to hurry to the Hokage immediately. As fast as his sluggish limbs will carry him. Kinoe. If you really report the failure… you’re dead. Or worse.

He grimaces behind his mask.

 

 

 

The taste of chocolate is heavy on his tongue once more when his request to help Kinoe is denied. When he is ordered to go to the infirmary instead. He swallows it down and follows Yugao to help… a friend. 

Or… someone who can become one. One day.

 

Maybe soon.

 

 

He finds Kinoe alive but strapped to a laboratory chair, his gut churning with the realization that he is, in all likelihood, just in time. He tries not to let his hands shake when he frees him, their escape almost foiled by Danzo himself.

 

Kakashi watches as the Sandaime interferes, at last, after all, accepting some kind of deal with Danzo for the release of Kinoe, if Kakashi is interpreting the almost polite discussion correctly.

He tries not to feel bad about that.

 

And fails. By a mile.

 

Too bad I forced you to do something, huh.

 

It’s a good thing his thoughts are not read right now.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He catches Jiraiya just as the big Sannin is leaving through the front gate. “Jiraiya-sama.”

Jiraiya halts for a moment, and then tilts his head somewhat, resuming his step. 

Kakashi falls into step next to him, wincing at the way his muscles protest. He still hasn’t been to the infirmary after all, but there simply has not been time yet, the need to catch Jiraiya and talk to him way more important.

To himself at least.

 

Jiraiya looks down at him, and then reaches over, picking a snake scale from his hair. His tone is a mix of amusement and resigned realization, tinged with affection as he holds it up to the light. “I see you had a run in with Orochimaru.” He offers it to Kakashi and Kakashi takes it, staring at it silently before putting it into his back pocket.

He clears his throat. “I… think Orochimaru wanted to abduct a wood style user.”

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow, still walking rather relaxed, his wooden shoes clacking softly. “A wood style user.”

Kakashi nods, shooting a look up. “I… what would Orochimaru want with a wood user.”

Something shifts in Jiraiya’s face. He sighs, and then looks down at Kakashi and then at their surroundings, and Kakashi has the distinct impression he scans for other ninjas. Jiraiya’s voice softens just the tiniest bit. “Orochimaru is currently in a group called the Akatsuki. As usual, I believe he has various goals, and while I do not know why he would think he would need a wood style user, I think we should factor in that he could be needing said user for the group, not himself.”

Kakashi blinks, looking away for a long moment. He doesn’t need to say it, knows Jiraiya knows. They want to be able to control a Bijou. “Do you know the other members of that group?”

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow. “I’m working on that.”

Kakashi blinks, wondering if he just doesn’t want to tell yet. Or tell me. He frowns, shooting another look up. “I’m allowed to engage from time to time now. Teach him a few things. I have to keep my Anbu mask on though.”

Jiraiya hums, and then sighs. “I wish Hiruzen would not be so paranoid regarding him.” He grimaces a bit, looking down at Kakashi. “But then the Sandaime is under a lot of pressure from the Uchiha clan.” He weighs his head, his voice a bitter chuckle. “Something will give, with that clan, at some point.”

Kakashi frowns, thinking of several promising young students which are under consideration for the Anbu from that clan, already. “They certainly are powerful.”

Jiraiya hums. “Mhhh. They are. Which is why he doesn’t want them to really notice Naruto. I think the Sandaime thinks that if you were to be seen with Naruto without your mask…” 

With your Sharingan visible, he doesn’t spell out. Kakashi frowns, wondering if the Anbu mask really does that big of a difference, given his hair. 

He reaches up, touching it, deciding to voice his doubt. “But I am rather recognizable, even in Anbu mask.”

Jiraiya hums. “In your Anbu outfit you are an Anbu, nothing more, nothing less. And people see what they want to see. They look at you and know you’re on some kind of mission, and one they are not supposed to think or even ask about. So they dismiss you from their thoughts, because that is the thing that they are supposed to do. If you were taking off your mask and showing your Sharingan however…”

Kakashi pulls a face, feeling extremely tired suddenly. And hating the wisdom in the answer, with a passion. “I see.”

 

Jiraiya reaches over and ruffles his hair and Kakashi shoots him a skunk eye, and Jiraiya laughs at him, loudly. He leans in, grinning. “I bet Minato did that all the time, too, didn’t he.”

Kakashi swallows a sudden lump in his throat down, not trusting his voice. He nods silently, glad for his face mask. 

Jiraiya hums, dropping his hand and hooking his thumbs under the straps of his backpack instead. “From what I’ve seen Naruto seems mightily affectionate and in need of cuddles, too. You’ll do each other good, eventually.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he scoffs.

Jiraiya smiles at that, his gaze on the sky, wistful. “Ah, Kakashi, time flies. And I think your lives will be entwined. And then… suddenly, you’ll look back and 20 years have passed and your bones ache when you push yourself up…  When those years will have passed for you, you will find peace. I just know it.”

He is silent for a moment, and Kakashi blinks away sudden tears, tries to keep the sob out of his breathing. 

Jiraiya turns to him, his voice devastatingly soft. “It’s the gift Minato chose for you after all.”

Kakashi laughs out at that, bitterly, painfully, the sob coloring it after all.

Jiraiya reaches out and hugs him with his left arm, for a moment, pressing Kakashi into his side.  Jiraiya grins at him, with that signature grin once more, that is so exuberant it borders on fake, but Kakashi knows for once that it is not, Jiraiya’s brilliant personality beaming at him, full force. “I believe in you, Hatake Kakashi. You’ll make it.”

 

Jiraiya stops on the road, and Kakashi halts as well, unable to keep the tears from falling. Jiraiya squeezes his shoulder, bending down just a bit to look him in the eye. “Go and clean up, Kakashi. Regenerate your body. And then, why don’t you clean that scale and give the shiny thing to a young boy in dire need of affection and regenerate your soul, too, hmmm?”

He smiles and turns away, holding up his hand, calling back over his shoulder with laughter coloring his voice. “See you soon, Hatake Kakashi. I’ll let you reap the benefits of my research.”

 

Kakashi snorts, through the tears, and watches him go, until the distant sun swallows Jiraiya’s lone figure in its rays.

 

Kakashi turns to Konoha, and does as he was asked.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

The silver scale sits next to the small bag of marbles, and the goggles when Naruto deigns to take them off at least. On the nightstand.

Kakashi looks at it, from afar, remembering how Naruto’s face had lit up upon seeing him once more, and the little squeal when he had given it to him, to ‘remember him by’. 

 

He had kneeled on the floor, and Naruto had flung himself at him, hugging tightly.

And Kakashi… had allowed himself to hug back.

To… feel.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He knows he made the right decision when Kinoe enters the Anbu locker room, decidedly insecure. 

 

He offers him a chance to start anew by calling him by his other name, and gives him a thumbs up, vouching for him on instinct and assigning him to his own team.

Kinoe… Tenzou smiles at him, and Kakashi smiles back, another piece of his life slipping into place.

 

 

Chapter 5: Cheating death, repeatedly

Summary:

The wheels turn, and one of Kakashi's loves enters his life.

Notes:

Supposedly Naruto smeared the Hokage heads not just once :P And - in my HC Iruka started teaching early at the academy, because when Naruto graduates, he is already an accomplished teacher. So he must have started learning to teach rather early (since he is close to Kakashi’s age I HC his age ~18 here, Kakashi is 19 when Naruto is 5).
And I find their later relationship in canon fascinating, there is HISTORY between them imho, so I… went there and will build that ☺️

 

Also: I added “angst with happy ending” to the tags so y’all know that Kakashi’s … suffering will not be in vain :)

Chapter Text

 

Kakashi stares down at her name, the light rain fitting his surroundings. 

Rin is silent, as usual, her soul probably at rest, unlike his own.

 

The wind picks up and the day is promising to be beautiful later on, when the clouds have blown away. Kakashi exhales, bending down to touch her name for a moment. “See you soon, Rin.” One way or another. He looks at the monument in the distance, the memory of Obito overlaid with another pair of goggles, another color of spiky hair. He sighs, looking up at the Hokage heads for a moment, wanting to look at Minato’s somber expression and maybe, just maybe draw some strength from it…. And starts, the bright red lines of paint visible on it even from this distance.

 

The strings of expletives leaving his mouth really have no place on a cemetery.

 

Kakashi jumps towards the rocks, hastily pulling out his Anbu mask from the bag in his back, fumbling for a moment to make sure the book is secure. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He catches Naruto mid-tumble, silently cursing to himself, the little boy decidedly unimpressed by the danger he was in just now, squealing in his arms, and throwing his own arms around Kakashi’s neck. “Sukea!! You’re back!”

Kakashi grunts, pissed at himself for mellowing instantly. He tries to keep his voice stern. “Naruto, what have you done?” He puts Naruto down, tries not to echo the grin that is beaming up at him. Sheesh, you’re a sucker for his smile, aren’t you. Something so definitely Kushina in it, too, sheer irreverence. “Naruto, this is inacceptable.” 

Naruto blinks up at him, still grinning and then squirms free, just as the yelling intensifies. “They’ll never catch me!”

And he’s off, scurrying through the streets and legs of people trying to catch him and Kakashi gapes after him, stunned into silence by the realization that Naruto knew he would not be the one discipline him. 

Calls, and the rushing of feet and Kakashi hides in the shadows, pushing up his mask to pinch the bridge of his nose. 

And shake his head at himself.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He crouches on the window sill, watching Naruto eat another cup of instant ramen. His tone is dry. “You cheated death there, today.”

Naruto turns to him, his eyes lighting up. He slurps the rest of the noodles hanging out in, answering with his mouth full. “Naahhhh, there’s always Anbu around. And jumping off is fun!”

Kakashi grunts, resolving to talk to his squad about this. Always Anbu around, huh. They must be taking shifts. I wonder if they’re ordered. 

And… who is taking those shifts.

Who ordered them. 

 

He sighs, entering the apartment silently. Watches as Naruto slurps up the rest of the broth. “You should eat more fresh food, Naruto.”

Naruto shrugs, something in his little face darkening. “I can’t afford to go for fresh ramen.”

Kakashi feels a headache coming on, grimly thinking of the rather sizeable inheritance sitting somewhere. “I see.” He clears his throat, tries not to let the bitterness color his tone. “You could go and catch some fish?”

Naruto shrugs again, burping quietly. He pokes the empty ramen cup. “It’s no fun if you’re not there… besides…” 

Kakashi tilts his head, softly prompting. “Besides?”

Naruto pulls a face. “The Uchiha’s have closed their clan territory most of the time and now I would need to go aaalllll around the village to get to the river, and that leads me through the market area and…” He trails off.

Kakashi repeats, rather resigned. “I see.”

They are silent for a moment, and Kakashi’s heart aches, viciously.  He clears his throat again. “I have a week off in a little while. I’ll take you fishing then, promise.”

Naruto smiles up at him, some of the bleakness gone again. 

Kakashi smirks softly behind his mask. “In the meantime… why don’t you start practicing Kanji?” 

Naruto looks away, pouting. His voice is very small. “I… don’t know how.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, frowning for a moment. “Right. Err… I guess that is something that I’ll start with you in a while, too.” I’ll need to figure out how, though. He reaches out, ruffles Naruto’s hair. “I’m glad you’re alright. Please be careful.”

Naruto looks at him, with eyes that are too wise for his age. “You too, Sukea.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He drops by the academy before his next mission, the fact that Naruto cannot read and write weighing heavily on his mind. If he cannot read and write in even the most basic way they won’t accept him into the academy I bet… It would be a welcome excuse not to.

He grimaces, the muscles in his jaw jumping. He walks up to the teacher’s lounge, hesitating before knocking on the door, and then pushes his mask up onto his head on a whim, not feeling comfortable to do this in full uniform for some reason.

Steps are heard from the inside, a middle-aged woman opening the door. “Yes?”

Kakashi inclines his head, shifting from one foot to the other. “I… err. I was wondering if someone could help me teach a young boy learn the basics of Kanji.”

She blinks up at him, her big eyes behind large glasses. She looks back over her shoulder, calling into the room. “Iruka-san, would you come here for a moment?”

Another set of steps and a young man comes up to the door, roughly in Kakashi’s age, with a scar squarely over the bridge of his nose. Kakashi smirks just a bit to himself, his own scar tickling for a moment.. The woman looks at him. “Iruka-san, this Anbu wishes to teach someone the basics of Kanji. Maybe you could help him how to best do that? You are very successful teaching the youngsters at the academy after all.”

The young man blushes, scratching the back of his head in embarrassment. “Ah, that is very kind of you to say, Daiko-san, but I’m still learning to teach myself.”

Daiko smirks at him, patting his arm. “Exactly. Which makes you perfect to teach someone else. See it as self-improvement.” She shoots a look at Kakashi. “Maybe you could meet up and discuss it?”

“Err….” Iruka blushes again and then shrugs, shooting a look at Kakashi. “Yeah, I mean, I could try?”

Kakashi looks at him, notes how the pupils dilate. Something in the big, brown, kind eyes makes him feel… weird. He clears his throat. “That would be wonderful. Maybe I can come over tonight? Due to my missions my time is often rather short.”

Iruka presses his lips together for a moment, shrugging again. “Yeah, that’s fine. 8 pm?”

Kakashi inclines his head, and then bows lightly to Daiko. “Thank you.”

And he vanishes, trying to pinpoint what exactly has his heart thundering like this.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He’s hovering on the threshold for a solid 10 minutes.

Watches his hand knock on the door, eventually. 

Tries not to fidget as he hears the soft steps from inside.

He has done his homework. He knows Umino Iruka is a Chunin-level ninja who was encouraged by the Sandaime to take up teaching. He knows Iruka lost his parents that fateful night, five years ago. He knows Iruka’s reputation is that of a big-hearted, kind individual, with a bit of a temper at times and, in rare occasions, bouts of insecurity masking as accusing righteousness. He knows that the older teacher chose well asking him to teach Kakashi.

 

The door opens, and Iruka smiles at him, a bit wryly, stepping aside to let him in. “Please come in… “ 

The eyebrows rise in silent inquiry and Kakashi supplies his name, rather hastily. “Hatake Kakashi. Thank you.” He steps in, silently taking off his shoes. The house smells nice, and he catches himself thinking that Iruka does too, truly glad for his face mask when he trails after him.

Iruka leads him silently into the big living room, the table already set with calligraphy supplies, and a tablet of tea, off to the side. 

Kakashi accepts his cup with a murmured ‘thank you’, watching Iruka watch his left eye. He fidgets, warily. Yeah, I know, my reputation precedes me. 

Iruka blinks at him, and then smiles softly, with a shrug, obviously sensing his discomfort. “Please forgive me. It is weird seeing an active Sharingan outside a combat situation.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, conceding that point. “Since I am not Uchiha I cannot turn it off.”

Iruka hums, a small grin on his lips. “Well, at least I won’t have to explain things to you twice then.”

Kakashi snorts, surprised, the mood between them lightening by leagues. He returns the smile, careful to eye-smile properly, and then shrugs. “I don’t always record, so no worries.”

The corners of Iruka’s eyes crinkle. “That’s good… I guess.”

Kakashi blinks at him, feeling suddenly a bit warm.  He clears his throat, deliberately pointing at the papers and brushes. “So… how do I teach Kanji?”

Iruka tilts his head, watching him for a moment. “Is the child easy to teach?”

Kakashi hesitates for a moment, thinking, and then he sighs, shaking his head. “I think he will be good learning physically, but I don’t think he’s too interested actually learning the letters. I think he’ll find it boring.”

Iruka chuckles softly, reaching for a brush. “Well, it is kind of boring.” He shoots a look at Kakashi. “May I… ask why an Anbu wants to teach a young child?”

Kakashi exhales, looking down at his tea. “No-one else does.” He raises his eyes to Iruka’s, wills him to understand. Knows he does enough when the brown eyes soften. Kakashi swallows, smiling softly, tilting his head. “I… am the only family he has.” There is a hint of chocolate on his tongue.

Iruka hesitates, and then he nods, once. “Alright.” He looks away for a moment. “You won’t tell me who?”

Kakashi smiles behind his mask. Bitterly. “No.” I can’t. 

Iruka nods, once, dipping the tip of his brush into the ink. He frowns, looking down on the paper. “Mhhh. Why don’t we use a trick to teach that willful child of yours then… what’s his favorite color?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, tone dry. “Orange.”

Iruka chuckles. “Alright, Kakashi, let me teach you how to teach to write that word.”

Kakashi smirks softly. “Maybe… He also likes ramen. A lot.”

Iruka shoots him a look. “Good thinking.”

Kakashi chuckles, blushing just softly. “I see why they chose you to teach me.”

Iruka smiles at him, before turning to his paper. “I’m glad they did.”

Kakashi swallows. “So am I.” He puts the tea away and reaches for another brush, stepping up next to Iruka and follows his instructions, relaxing into the warmth he feels.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“Tenzou!”

 

Kakashi yells, shuriken whirring around him. The sound of metal hitting hollow wood echoes through the air, followed by the sounds of explosions.

Kakashi clenches his teeth, his tanto a silver sliver arching through the air, the red fountain as it pierces one of the attackers an almost beautiful offset.

Kakashi’s eye glows behind the mask, his right hand gathering chakra, and then chidori flares up, and Kakashi punches through another ninja crossing his path.

Warmth, and flesh and bone, around my wrist.

He closes his eyes, grimacing, and withdraws it, jumping up into the trees to try to get an overview. One of his squad is down, several kunais sticking out of his back. Kakashi grimaces, turning his head to try to see anything in the direction he knows Tenzou is at. 

There is a whirring sound and then several metal lines wrap themselves around his body, and he trips, falling down, into a spider’s web. 

Fuck.

He tries to use chidori to cut himself lose, but the lines seem to drain his already low chakra, and every move makes the lines cut deeper into his skin, wet heat trickling down. 

The horror visage of a ninja half-transformed into a spider enters his vision, cackling. “Red eye, red eye, fell into my web.”

Kakashi grunts, trying to catch the ninja into a genjutsu, but it is no use, the eyes positioned too far apart. The spider crawls closer slowly, over his body, leaving little cuts all over his legs and lower body, the the fanged jaw glinting. “Too bad, too bad, must now give it up.”

Kakashi hisses, writhing futilely. The spider sing-songs again, with a sneer. “My gift, my gift, to our lord’s great need.”

Kakashi yells, through clenched teeth, turning his face away as one clawed hand reaches for him, pushes up the mask. The cold skin touches his throat, turning his head back forcefully, and Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, terror flooding his limbs. He tries to breathe through it, tries to find an out, but there is cold steel on his cheek and he clenches his jaw in anticipation and …

Suddenly there is a wet, squelching sound, followed by a stunned silence and then the spider falls down onto him, the disgusting visage gurgling and snapping its jaws just below his throat. 

“Senpai!”

Kakashi’s eyes fly open, and he tries to breathe, regretting it instantly as the smell of that thing floods his senses, making him retch. More wood slams into the spider’s body, shoving it off, and then Tenzou’s concerned face enter’s Kakashi’s vision, the black eyes staring into his. “Senpai, are you alright?”

Kakashi nods jerkily, not trusting his voice, and Tenzou cuts the wires holding him, catching him as he falls to the ground. Tenzou lowers him down, propping him up against a tree. “Easy, Senpai, it’s over now.” 

Kakashi breathes heavily, looking over at the body of his fellow Anbu, just visible through the trees. “The others?”

Tenzou looks down, and Kakashi can now see that he’s bleeding too, the wound in his side ugly and wide. “Dead. The enemies, too.” 

Kakashi grunts, pulling himself up. “We need to return.” He looks at the bloody scroll that’s hooked into Tenzou’s vest. “You fulfilled our mission. Very good.”

Tenzou nods curtly, eyeing the wounds all over Kakashi’s body. “I’ll collect the mask, and activate the self-destruct jutsu. We’re in no condition to carry him home.”

Kakashi nods warily, watching him leave. The sizzling of flesh is loud somehow, rising like bile. He bandages the bigger wounds, sees that Tenzou has done the same when he returns. 

The world tilts and then steadies as he straightens up. “Let’s go.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The Sandaime eyes him darkly, looks at the little wounds leading up Kakashi’s body. His comment is short and rather astute. “They tried to take your eye again?”

Kakashi nods, silently, kneeling in front of him. Distantly he wonders who will clean up the blood on the floor. And how often he might cheat death. How often he will be able to fight off those wanting to steal his eye. 

One day I will lose it, I just know it. 

He swallows.

Sarutobi Hiruzen sighs, and looks down at the scroll and the bloody Anbu masks of their fallen comrade. “Thank you. You are both under orders to heal and take the week off. Dismissed.”

 

 

Kakashi jumps out, followed by Tenzou, landing silently close to the park in front of the hospital. 

“Oh my god.”

The exclamation makes them both look up sharply, Kakashi’s eyes locking with Iruka’s who is sitting on a bench, eating lunch. Iruka gets up and hurries over, hands hovering over Kakashi’s upper body. His expression borders on terrified, mixed with incredulous astonishment. Tenzou silently moves a bit to the side. 

“What…” Iruka doesn’t finish the question, pressing his lips together. His hands hover close to Kakashi’s body still, close but not touching. 

Kakashi grimaces slightly, shrugging once. “Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. They’re only shallow.” He tries to smile, but knows his voice carries the strain. “I‘ve had worse.“

Iruka blinks at him. “I see.” He shoots a look at Tenzou, down to his bleeding wound, and then turns away, throwing the words back over his shoulder. “You know, I bet you haven’t eaten properly in a while. My place, 7pm. Get some healing and then come over. I’ll cook you dinner, Kakashi.” 

 

Kakashi stares after him, not knowing what to make of it.

Tenzou leans in just slightly, tone dry, carried on pained gasps. “I… guess you have a date, Senpai.”

Kakashi wheezes, just slightly.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He fidgets in front of the door, once again, trying to make sense of his feelings.

He senses Iruka behind the door and smirks wryly to himself, clearing his throat. The door is opened before he can actually knock, Iruka’s dark eyes boring into his. 

Iruka’s voice is tinged with humor. “I may not be your level, but I do manage to sense close chakra.”

Kakashi chuckles, blushing with a shrug. “I’m sorry. I’m not… “ He hesitates, blushing even more. Forcing the words out. “Used to this.” Anything like this.

Iruka blinks, suddenly seeming nervous. “I… did I… interpret this wrong?”

Kakashi stares at him, shaking his head before he can actually think about it. “I… No. I don’t think so.”

A wide smile steals itself over Iruka’s face. “You don’t think so?”

Kakashi shrugs again, somewhat sheepishly. 

Iruka grins, holding out his hand. “Come in.”

Kakashi looks down at it, and then takes it, his heart beating in his throat.

 

Iruka draws him in and then closes the door and they stand there, in the small space behind the door, silent in the dark hallway. 

Kakashi isn’t sure who moves in first, but he suddenly knows he can smell Iruka’s scent below the smell of fresh food and paper and ink and chalk and flowers. Iruka reaches up, and traces the scar over Kakashi’s eye, closing the lid gently. And then he leans up and breathes agains Kakashi’s mask and Kakashi groans, shivering, falling forward to press his masked lips over Iruka’s mouth. 

There is a small sound that steals itself out of Iruka and Kakashi’s hands come up, on instinct, framing Iruka’s face and he tilts his head, inhaling deeply, heat rushing through him. 

Iruka gasps against his mask. “I want to kiss you.”

Kakashi mewls deep in his throat and then rips his mask down, returning his hand to Iruka’s jaw immediately, to still their shaking.

Iruka smiles beatifically at him and then moves in, the kiss short and chaste and everything, and Kakashi gasps, moving in to kiss back, their scents mixing intoxicatingly. 

Soft lips, gliding across his own.

Iruka moans deep in his throat and Kakashi sighs, his heart beating a thousands miles an hour, his fingers gliding along skin, threading through Iruka’s hair, pulled high into a ponytail. Iruka tilts his head and sighs into Kakashi’s mouth and desire slams into him, making him gasp.

Tongues touch, and electricity sparks, heavenly.

Iruka breaks their kiss, laughing gently, his dark eyes reopening. “I think that answers that question.”

Kakashi moans sharply, unable to form words, feeling the answering hardness against his groin, only now registering the hands pushed up his back, under his vest. He licks his lips, knows his eyes are a bit wild. “I … don’t know what to do.”

Iruka smiles at him, gently, full of affection. “Well, I am your teacher, am I not.”

Kakashi nods once, and then moves in for another kiss, feeling utterly ravenous.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He trails his finger along the lines of Iruka’s back later, in the moonlit dark room, dinner and dessert long come and gone. His body is thrumming sedately, sated in a way he hasn’t really achieved alone before yet. And aching in various places, too. 

Even the smell is enticing, heady and deep, of them.

Iruka watches him, his undone hair wild, head propped up on his crossed arms. His tone is soft. “Are you alright?”

Kakashi blinks, not taking his eyes off the sheen of light on Iruka’s skin. “I’m used to pain.”

Iruka snorts, blushing deeply, but he shakes his head. “That is not what I meant.”

Kakashi grins, looking up for a moment, before returning to watch the shadows play. “What then?”

Iruka nods at the Anbu tattoo, on the shoulder propping Kakashi up, right next to him. “You are spoken for… I… hadn’t seen.” He blinks, fidgeting a bit, his voice somewhat insecure. “I hadn’t expected it to be changed for an active Anbu and so I didn’t really look at it and now I feel bad, for…” He hesitates, dropping off. 

Kakashi blinks, trying to discern his feelings on the matter, but there’s not much really, the whole thing so remote it feels unreal. He shrugs, trying to convey his thoughts. “I… Don’t feel bad, please Iruka.” He swallows, looking up to look at him. “I… rather have this with you now than any fantasy setting in the future.”

Iruka looks at him for a long, long moment, and then relaxes again, with a sigh. “Alright.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Just like that? Just alright? Don’t you feel you need to… ” Know your own, too?

Iruka shrugs. “We’re both adults. Life is short. As you said, it’s a bit of a fantasy setting, and…” He trails off and smirks softly, his voice easily carrying the humor, threaded with pain and experience. “And I like you, as you probably noticed.”

Kakashi snorts, blushing. “Yeah, I noticed.”

Iruka lowers his head a bit, looking up from beneath his lashes. “Yeah? Why don’t you show me what you’ve learned then?”

Kakashi grins and then tumbles him over, tickling him and diving in for a deep kiss, proceeding to do exactly that.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He smiles at Naruto when he sees him again, the bad conscience he was privately afraid of not manifesting itself, at all. 

What did Jiraiya say? I don’t have to stay celibate? 

He exhales, watching Naruto open yet another cup of instant ramen, while the blond boy babbles on about some kind of prank he pulled today. 

Kakashi shakes his head, nods in the right places, silently keeping company while his own thoughts churn in his head.  If… we will ever find each other -like that-… I really cannot imagine… He snorts, shaking his head at himself, and Naruto shoots him a look but keeps on talking, gesticulating wildly. Kakashi looks at the small face, the small hands. 

It’s really too… weird. 

He frowns, dwelling on the fact that it would also mean that he and Iruka… He shakes his head to clear it, unwilling to even think about it. 

Iruka is… Kakashi blushes, easily recognizing that he is, in fact, deeply infatuated, his heart racing when he thinks about meeting Iruka again later. 

 

He reaches out and ruffles Naruto’s hair, unable to let him see the smile after all, putting the chuckle into his voice. “Well, considering all your adventures, I’m glad you’re here, safe and sound.”

Naruto snickers, ducking his head. “As I told you, they’ll never catch me.”

Kakashi hums, looking at him for a moment. He clicks his tongue, deciding to address the subject directly. “Naruto, do you wish to attend the academy at some point?”

Naruto’s big blue eyes widen even more, looking up at Kakashi with an intensity that takes Kakashi’s breath. “… Can I?”

Kakashi swallows, harshly. Oh, you have to. If I don’t make that happen Minato and Kushina will hunt me down in afterlife. He clears his throat. “I think so, yes. But you need to learn how to read and write first, at least a few letters.” He tilts his head, making a show of pretending to think about it. “Should I teach you the basics?”

Naruto claps his hands, exuberant, the whole table shaking when he jostles it, jumping up to throw his arms around Kakashi’s neck. “Yes, please!!”

Kakashi laughs gently, holding him for a long, long moment, sunshine tickling his skin and peace, settling.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He dwells on the memory of that feeling while he eats with Iruka later, their smiles easy and intimate. They are sitting next to each other, instead of across, their shoulders and legs touching from time to time. Sending little shivers through Kakashi’s body. 

It’s a heady, addictive feeling.

Still. He shakes his head, frowning for a split second.

Iruka shoots him a look. “What is it.”

Kakashi shrugs, quirking an eyebrow. “Nothing, I was just remembering the way… “ I felt, he felt “… that little boy took to me teaching him the first letters.” He chuckles softly, his next words the utter truth. “He’s hating it, with a passion.”

Iruka chuckles. “Most of them do. Most of them come to the academy with barely the basics, and they absolutely hate that we make them sit down and practice letters, and not send them out to throw shuriken, for years.” He snorts, reaching for his drink. “A lot of the kids entering the academy only see the adult ninjas as fighting heroes, and not people who had to sit down and learn tactics, and physics, and techniques, too.”

Kakashi hums, looking down at his food. “Well, I mean… “

Iruka interrupts him, waving his chopsticks at him and leaning into him to take the sting out of the words. “I know, I know, the brilliant Hatake Kakashi didn’t have to sit down and practice.” He grins, leaning in to press a kiss to Kakashi’s cheek. “I looked you up. You didn’t tell me you’re a genius?”

Kakashi blushes, shrugging. “I… so they say, but I don’t really think I am, I’m just…” He shrugs again. 

Iruka grins at him. “Well, I can vouch for your ability to learn…”

Kakashi chuckles, ducking his head. He shoots Iruka a sidelong glance. “Do you… Do you have a lot of experience?”

Iruka smirks at him, but his voice is very gentle. “Some. The academic circles tend to be more open about this… kind of thing.” He blushes a bit, ducking his head. “Not a lot though, actually.” He grins. “I had a good teacher as well.”

Kakashi looks away, tries to keeps his voice level. “Yeah? Who.”

Iruka leans forward, tries to catch his gaze. “Are you… jealous?”

Kakashi clears his throat, somewhat embarrassed, especially since they’re technically only on their second date. And then he jerks, as Iruka pushes his mouth onto his ear, licking softly along the shell. Moaning into it. “That’s so sexy.”

Kakashi groans and throws his chopsticks onto the table, turning to capture his mouth in a searing kiss. Iruka groans into him and then climbs on top of him, his arms around Kakashi’s neck, rocking softly. Kakashi sighs, and lets himself fall into it, chasing the taste of them, and the delighted giggles, and the little moans, and heated flesh, under his hands.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

He runs a finger over the scar on Iruka’s face, gently, carefully, lets it say what he can not. He watches as the brown eyes dim a bit in sorrow, watching him withdraw after a week spent mostly in bed.

 

And fishing with Naruto, as promised. 

 

His and Iruka’s time together had been spent exploring. Teaching. Living.

Cheating on, or better flirting with the little death.

 

His time with Naruto had been easy and joyful. 

 

Kakashi pulls down his mask, locking his feelings tightly, and vanishes through the open window.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 6: Whiskers on a face

Notes:

I had a big discussion on a discord re the writing of Guy’s/Gai’s name. While apparently the direct translation of the written Japanese would be “Gai”, the way it’s written indicates it as a foreign word, and that is how you would write “Guy”, and Kishimoto apparently confirmed that he wanted it written as “Guy” in English (personally I think that ‘Gai’ in the english pronunciation was probably too close to ‘gay’, but that’s just my hc). 

Tl;dr: I have switched the spelling of his name in this fic to “Guy”.

Chapter Text

 

 

 

Chidori cuts through flesh and bone, killing the other ninja instantly, Tenzou dropping to the ground next to him, looking down at the rogue ninja they were ordered to kill.

His voice is colored by admiration. “Your Lightning Blade is as brilliant as ever, Senpai.”

Kakashi clenches his fist, waits out the slight pain. His voice sounds tired to his own ears, though he tries to show it off as offhand pride. “A kill is a kill, that’s all.” He turns away, not waiting for an answer.

 

Tenzou follows him, silently, all the way back to Konoha, through the village and back to the locker room. Kakashi grimaces a bit, waiting for the proverbial shoe to drop. 

Tenzou waits until they’ve cleaned up and changed, his tone careful.  “Our team is short a member.” Still, he means. Ever since that… spider. Has been for months.

Kakashi had been unwilling to choose another Anbu, relying on Tenzou only. He doesn’t really feel like they should change it either, their small team very successful. Though he is under no illusions that a third member will be added again, eventually. Maybe the one the Hokage has been talking to him about. He keeps the comment noncommittal. “Sooner or later, someone will show up.”

 

Sarutobi Hiruzen keeps him kneeling after their report, only dismissing Tenzou, and Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, suddenly knowing that his earlier, off-hand comment will prove correct rather sooner than later. 

The Hokage’s voice is sonorous. “A new member will be joining your team.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “Is it the one we previously discussed?”

Hiruzen gives a tiny nod. “Yes. He’s extremely capable.”

Somehow Kakashi really does not doubt that. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Itachi is quiet, attentive and alert.

The fact that he is exceptional is a given. Kakashi had not expected anything less.

He fulfills the demands easily, confidently and calmly, and he does it so well, it makes the hairs on Kakashi’s neck stand up. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He drops by Naruto’s apartment after the incident with Itachi’s… test by the other Anbu, grimly realizing that Naruto’s time at the academy will probably be similarly tested. 

That’s still a year away. Relax, Kakashi.

He keeps the thoughts to himself, and his relief at seeing the boy safe and sound, too, hugging him a moment too long.

Naruto looks at him, with those big blue eyes that seem to strip him bare, masks or not, and he hastily diverts his attention, asking to see the letters he practiced writing.

Naruto groans, deeply, and Kakashi laughs at him, some of the gloomy darkness vanishing.

And then Naruto scrambles off, retrieving the papers, showing Kakashi the words he wrote.

Rather proudly, too.

 

Sukea.

Kakashi smiles, turning his eyes to the other letters, slowly realizing there’s more words.

 

Friend. 

Mother.

Father.

 

Family.

 

Kakashi gasps, silently, bitter chocolate choking him.

 

It takes all his control to stay for a while longer, the need to leave writhing, biting thing within him, eating at his guts.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He presses Iruka against the wall when he comes home, to him, immediately, desperately, follows the moans and sighs to the center, deep-throating Iruka right there, in the hallway.

Iruka gasps above him, fingers clenched in Kakashi’s hair, and Kakashi swallows and swallows and swallows until Iruka cries out and his pure taste finally washes the chocolate away. 

 

Darkness remains, darkness he screams under Iruka’s hands into the pillows later, but that stays despite the pleasure, robbing him of his sleep for long, silent hours.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He watches as the shop owner throws the fox mask at Naruto, cursing him.

The little blond boy reaches for it, picking it up, not understanding. Kakashi will later hear that he wore it for even more pranks, but now he watches the other children watch, silently observes their reactions.

 

One boy in particular catches his attention and he recognizes him immediately, the heir to the Nara clan watching attentively, flanked by several other kids. Watching, not engaging. But not judging either, if his expression is anything to go by. There is understanding in his gaze as he watches Naruto run, and wisdom in his few chosen words.

 

The people call ‘demon child’ after Naruto, and Kakashi wants to scream, wants to hurt them, his hand twitching with too much electricity.

 

 

He jumps to the school instead, breathlessly knocking on the teacher’s lounge door. 

Iruka opens it, with a smile, and a quick look over his shoulder, his whisper very quiet. “Kakashi, what are you doing here.” He takes his hand and drags him off, to a storeroom down the hall. “I felt your chakra, but I don’t think I can steal away for long now?”

Kakashi exhales shudderingly, pushing the mask up hastily. His eyes bore into Iruka’s and Iruka sobers instantly, his eyes growing huge. “Kakashi, what is it?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, trying to form the words, looking down at their joined hands. 

“Iruka…” He hesitates, looking away for a moment. 

Iruka puts a palm to Kakashi’s cheek, and his forehead to Kakashi’s. Waiting. Kakashi inhales deeply, tries to relax. His throat clicks as he speaks. “Iruka… Iru-chan, do you… do you have influence over how the classes are combined?”

Iruka blinks at him, his eyes huge at this short a distance, and obviously surprised by the endearment. He raises his eyebrows, withdrawing just a bit. “I… could have?”

Kakashi nods, hastily. He exhales shudderingly. “Do you… know when Nara Shikamaru will enter the academy?”

Iruka tilts his head. “Yes? I believe he is set to enter next summer?”

Kakashi nods, silently calculating the time until then. “I… I will ask you for one of the slots in his class, to be given to… someone.”

Iruka’s smile is gentle. “The child you teach?”

Kakashi’s throat is dry. “Yes.” He hesitates. “He’s special.”

Iruka gently strokes Kakashi’s cheek with his thumb. “It’s alright, we’ll manage a child with special needs.”

Kakashi grimaces, knowing Iruka misunderstands, but doesn’t want to correct him now either. He locks his gaze with Iruka, trying to let him see how much he means it, how important this is for him. “I’ll explain then. When does he have to sign up?”

Iruka raises his eyebrows. “This winter.” He looks away for a moment, frowning. “In six weeks, to be precise.”

Kakashi swallows. Six weeks. Six weeks until you’ll probably loathe me. He smiles, painfully, pressing a little kiss to Iruka’s mouth. “Alright.”

He reaches up to pull the mask down again, but Iruka stops him, his brown eyes seeing too much. “You’re afraid. What are you afraid of, Kakashi?”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, and then reopens them, letting him see the tears that threaten to fall. His voice breaks on the words. “Losing you.”

Iruka stares at him, eyes wide. His voice is an incredulous whisper. “Why would you lose me?” And then he shakes himself, and he drops Kakashi’s hand to hold his face in both, softly, shaking Kakashi. “These months with you have been the best time I’ve ever had, Kaka-chan. I think we have something good here, don’t you think?”

Kakashi nods jerkily, letting the tears fall, unheeded. 

Iruka shakes him again, a bit, his gaze imploring. “I don’t want to lose you, I don’t want to ever lose you, I can’t imagine…” He breaks off, breathing hard. His throat clicks when he speaks again. “Life is short, Kaka-chan. I won’t let you go.”

Kakashi inhales, shudderingly, his voice smaller than he would like to have it. “Promise?”

Iruka presses his forehead to Kakashi’s again, pressing until it hurts them both. “I promise.”

Kakashi pulls him in and holds him, forcing himself to believe.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

There is a tug on the line, and Naruto hops up and down, and Kakashi leans forward, putting a hand onto his shoulder. “Easy now. Don’t jostle the line too much. Pull it out slow and steady.”

Naruto’s tongue sticks out as he concentrates, doing as Kakashi asks. Kakashi rolls up the line behind his hands, watching Naruto watch the water’s surface.

Watches as the sheer, exuberant joy breaks out when the fish breaks the surface. “There, look, Sukea!!”

Kakashi chuckles softly. “I see it. Now pull it towards you and then kill it, swiftly, as I showed you.”

Naruto grimaces, but then does as he’s told, using a sharp stone to end the fish’s suffering. Kakashi quietly unhooks the lure. “Very well. Now, gut it as I showed you, too.”

Naruto blinks up at him and Kakashi pulls out a kunai, giving it to him hilt first. “Just the tip, try to not cut the organs.” 

Naruto closes his small fingers around the hilt and Kakashi looks away for a moment, the memory of his own small fingers around a kunai, drenched in blood suddenly way too vivid. He turns back to see Naruto pull out the guts, frowning in concentration. Kakashi nods at the river. “Throw the rest in there, we won’t use the innards. Go and was the fish out too, but be careful not to drop it.”

The kunai is shoved at him, unseeing and Kakashi grunts, somewhat irritated. “Wanting to stab me?”

Naruto’s head swivels around, the golden hair a halo in the afternoon sun, his breath fogging a bit in the chilly air despite the sun. “Oh, I’m sorry, Sukea, please forgive me.”

Kakashi waves him off, now irritated at himself for being irritated at Naruto. “It’s alright, I was just… “ Joking. Not. He sighs, inaudibly. You’re only irritated because the date that you have to sign him up for the academy is drawing near. He grimaces, and nods when Naruto returns with the cleaned fish. “Very good.” He reaches out, ruffling the hair once more.

Naruto ducks his head, with a grin.

And then he looks up, his blue eyes glowing. “You’re my only friend, Sukea.”

Pain shoots through Kakashi, with the devastation of hatred. He clears his throat. “Surely there must be other children at your age?” 

Naruto looks down and away shrugging. His voice is small. “They’re all afraid of me. And even if they’re not, their parents are, always dragging them off and away from me. They…”

Kakashi swallows, kneeling down. “What do they do.”

Naruto blinks, rapidly. “They always point at my cheeks, calling me demon.” His eyes come up to Kakashi’s deeply hidden under the mask. “No-one else has whiskers like me. Why do I have whiskers?”

Kakashi blinks, hearing Kushina’s voice in his mind, telling him of her fears. How right you were, Kushina-san. He clears his throat, pointing to his mask. “I have stripes on my mask, similar to whiskers…”

Naruto grimaces, seemingly pulling into himself. “But you don’t have any on your face, do you.” It is not a question.

Kakashi curses silently wrecking his brain to lighten the mood. He sighs. “You will find friends when you enter the academy, Naruto.”

Naruto looks back at him, eyes dull. “I will?”

Kakashi nods. “Yes.” I will make sure of it.

Naruto blinks, his voice small. “Promise?”

Kakashi swallows, forcing the bile down. “I promise.” 

Naruto looks away, shuffles on his feet. “There is this one girl that’s always nice to me, but she’s shy and she’s always dragged away from me by her family, too. I hope I get to be in a class with her.”

Kakashi exhales, heavily. “Maybe? What’s her name?”

Naruto shrugs. 

Kakashi looks at him for a moment, deciding to drop the subject for now. He holds out his hand. “Come. Let’s go back.”

Naruto takes his hand and Kakashi starts walking, laughing gently when Naruto pushes the line and fish into his hands to run after some birds. The Uchiha complex river-side entrance catches his eye and he decides to use the shortcut through the clan district, despite the rather open hostility, despite the more often than not closed doors. I just want to look up at his window, once more. 

He pushes the doors open, feeling Naruto follow him, cautiously, and quite bravely not clinging to his leg. Or hand. Kakashi smiles to himself, quietly giving him credit for that. 

 

Dark eyes watch as they walk by, intense eyes, and Kakashi keeps his shoulders down, keeps his stance relaxed. A Sharingan-wearing Anbu with a Jinchuriki. There probably is no bigger affront…  Still. Though Kakashi can feel the eyes watching them no-one engages them and Kakashi looks up at Obito’s apartment for only a moment, his heart giving a painful thud. 

 

His attention snaps back when a little, rather belligerent voice calls to him. 

“Who are you and what do you do here?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, looking down at the boy, roughly Naruto’s age, his dark eyes and unruly hair making him smirk behind the mask. His face seems vaguely familiar. “And you are?”

The boy raises his chin. “Uchiha Sasuke. And this is my street.”

Kakashi chuckles softly, feeling Naruto hover behind him. “Your street, huh.” 

He opens his mouth to say something, but Naruto surprises him, stepping around him and up to the other boy. “I am Uzumaki Naruto, nice to meet you!” He holds out his hand, grinning broadly, and Sasuke stares at him, obviously floored by this reaction. 

Naruto continues, unperturbed. “I will go to the academy soon, and Sukea says I will find new friends there. Will you go to the academy, too?”

Sasuke blinks at him, obviously mentally regrouping. “Of course. I am of age and I want to become a ninja, like my brother.” Ah yes. He’s probably Itachi’s younger brother. Interesting.

Naruto’s face lights up even more. “Cool, so we will be friends!”

Kakashi blinks at the deadpan-reasoning, as does Sasuke. The little boy’s voice is… unsure. “I… Maybe?”

Kakashi is rather glad for his mask, hiding his grin. He clasps Naruto’s shoulder gently when Sasuke only stares at the hand offered to him still. “Come, Naruto, it’s late and we still need to cook the fish. You’ll have lots of time to get to know each other soon.”

Naruto blinks up at him and then grins at Sasuke, skidding past him and towards the gate to the village a few dozen meters down the road.

Kakashi hesitates for a moment, looking down at Sasuke. “It’s been nice meeting you, Uchiha Sasuke.” And he steps past him as well, feeling the dark eyes bore into his back until the gates close behind him and Naruto.

 

 

Only when he tugs Naruto into bed later he realizes that Sasuke didn’t care much about the whiskers on Naruto’s face, and he smiles to himself, deciding to ask Iruka for another favor.

He’s smirking when he thinks about ways to make it up to him.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kakashi can feel Itachi’s eyes on him, whenever their duty allows.

The feeling becomes one he is accustomed to, during months and months of missions, time flying by.

 

He sighs, through his nose, knowing why Itachi looks at him, of course.

When Danzo sends them as assassins after the ninja Guy is supposed to meet, Kakashi leaves Tenzou in Konoha. There is enough darkness in you, already. Let me take this darkness for you.

He wonders for a moment why he doesn’t have the same qualms regarding Itachi. Who is even younger. 

 

But… I cannot spare them all. 

And he is… different. 

 

Itachi’s hovers on the branches with him, watching Guy who is having a good time on the mission. Kakashi smirks wryly. I envy you for this, the easy enjoyment of life.

He watches as the Shinobi in Guy’s squad light a fire, and huddles up above them in the crown of the tree, the light wind chilling him and Itachi to the bone.

 

Itachi’s dark eyes watch him, attentively, and Kakashi closes his own eyes, on purpose.

 

 

 

They watch as the scrolls are exchanged, the masks of the other Shinobi faction bearing a demonic counterfeit. They land silently when the exchange is done, the swords rushing through the air like a rain of silver droplets, painting to the ground in red.

 

Guy’s cry is loud, and outraged.

And then… disturbed.

 

Reason does not change an order, Guy. 

Kakashi tries to keep his own voice calm and level. Tries to make him understand. Knows he won’t readily forget the expression of disgust and devastation on Guy’s face.

 

This… is what I do.

 

This. This is what I am.

I am a killer.

 

 

He remembers asking the Sandaime for his release from the Anbu, so long ago already.

 

I‘m not allowed to be anything else. 

 

 

 

Itachi’s eyes burn into his back.

Kakashi wonders if he can hear his thoughts. He’s not entirely sure that this may be outside Itachi’s possibilities. 

But if he does, Itachi never says a word.

 

Kakashi trails Guy back to Konoha, and Itachi follows him, like a ghost.

 

And then addresses him after all, after they have reported to the Sandaime. After they have cleaned up. After they have gone up to the roof, to part for the night.

Itachi’s eyes are huge, and black, and deep and trying to dissolve Kakashi, somehow. “You aren’t an Uchiha and yet you possess the Sharingan.”

Kakashi almost laughs. Way to beat about the bush, there, Itachi. “This Sharingan was entrusted to me by a friend. To… never let a comrade get killed.”

Itachi’s left eyebrow quirks up, just a tad. “But they call you the friend-killer.”

Kakashi gasps a laugh this time, devoid of any humor. “So they do.” He resists the temptation to press a fist against his chest and against the phantom pain, refuses to double over and let it bring him down. There is … something that tells him not to show any weakness here, now. 

That this is more than mere curiosity on Itachi’s part. His throat clicks. “Both can be true, unfortunately.”

Itachi frowns. “So you took it after you killed your friend?”

Kakashi grimaces. “No. I… took it when Uchiha Obito offered it to me.” He turns to Itachi, locking their gazes, lets him see how serious he is. “As I said, it was a gift.”

Itachi blinks at him. “I see.”

Kakashi looks away for a moment. “It enables me to use chidori, and … that is what I killed R… a friend with.” Her name does not want to roll of his tongue. He tries to swallow it back down into himself, but it stays stuck in his throat, choking him. He shakes his head, pressing out. “Why is that important?”

Itachi blinks again, his huge, intelligent eyes almost void for a moment. There is something like bitter fatalistic devastation in them, for just a moment. “I… had wondered if you would be able to… help me with something.”

Kakashi exhales, slowly. He shakes his head once, though not in denial. “If I can. I’m your Senpai, I will help you whenever I can.”

Itachi smiles a little smile, obviously fake, and Kakashi suddenly knows that this was not the answer Itachi wanted. The words are meant to deflect and Kakashi grimaces upon hearing them. “Of course, Senpai.”

He thinks about saying something along the lines of ‘I mean it’ but knows it lame and ultimately futile, and he decides to just nod, trying to shake the feeling of dread. 

 

Itachi tilts his head and is gone, and Kakashi stares at the spot he’s been in, worry twisting deep in his gut.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kakashi is drawing little circles on Iruka’s naked chest, listening to the slowing drum of his heart, the sweat under his lips sweet. He blinks, knowing he has to address the issue tonight, forcing the words out. “I put in the forms today.”

“Oh?” Iruka does not stop stroking his back, his voice tired and relaxed. Sated. “So, will you finally tell me the name, or should I look for myself tomorrow.”

Kakashi sighs, trying to stay relaxed. “It’s… Uzumaki Naruto.” The wrong name still tastes like bile. 

Iruka stills, the only thing moving about him his heart, which begins thundering. When he finally speaks again, his voice is harsh. “What.”

Kakashi swallows, fighting to stay where he is and not to fidget or withdraw. “I… that is why I was afraid.” That is why I am afraid. He closes his eyes, waits for the proverbial whiplash.

Which doesn’t take long. “You have been guarding the Jinchuriki, this monster that has killed my parents, and now you have enrolled him in my class?”

Kakashi closes his eyes, tries to keep his voice level. “He is not the monster. The monster is in him, Iruka. Safely locked away.” I hope. “He is a little boy, that everybody shuns.” Even you, hangs in the air, unsaid.

Iruka’s breath is shallow, his fingers pressing into Kakashi’s skin. 

He sits up suddenly, pushing Kakashi away and draws a hand over his face, looking awfully pale. “I…” He trails off, shakes his head. And then he laughs, shooting a dark look back at Kakashi. “Man, you’re right to be afraid there.”

Kakashi pushes himself into a seating position as well, glumly looking at Iruka’s back. He tries to speak, the words coming out as a croak. “So… are you breaking up with me now?”

Iruka fidgets, shaking his head, and then he laughs, bitterly. “Asshole. I should.” He sniffs. “Anything else I should know?”

Kakashi grimaces. “I asked for him to be in the same class as Nara Shikamaru and Uchiha Sasuke.”

Iruka groans, putting his head in his hands. “Oh hell in a hand basket. Are you trying to kill me. That simply screams trouble.” He shakes his head, his voice extremely weary. “Anything else?”

Kakashi hesitates, sensing that mentioning the seal and their… supposedly combined fates would not be a good idea right now. His voice is low. “No.”

Iruka turns, shooting him a hard look. Repeating the question, and Kakashi squirms under his gaze. “Anything else I should know, Kakashi?!”

Kakashi blinks, making his voice firm, the lie rolling off his tongue with the phantom taste of chocolate. “No.”

Iruka turns back forward, shaking his head again. He is silent for a long time, sounding defeated when he finally speaks. “So tell me. How is he.”

Kakashi tries to form the words, tries to describe the defiantly exuberant little boy with the sunshine smile hiding his pain, and the brightest soul illuminating the darkness so brutally, but the only word that finally comes out of his mouth is: “Innocent.”

Iruka sniffs again, angrily wiping his eyes. He nods, eventually. “God, you really are an asshole.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow and concedes that particular point, with a little self-deprecating smile. He slowly shuffles up from behind and gently, carefully envelops Iruka, his hands spread over Iruka’s heart. He speaks his apology into Iruka’s neck. “I’m sorry.”

He feels the exhale, the way Iruka relaxes minutely. 

Iruka’s voice is dry. “Just so you know, you’ll have to make it up to me, every damn evening these little devils terrorize my school yard.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he snorts, and Iruka turns, hitting him none too gently in the shoulder and then proceeds to kiss him until the laughter changes to moans once more.

 

And Kakashi believes.

 

 

 

Chapter 7: Red moon rising

Notes:

I thought long and hard about whether this needed to happen, but… I do want some of the developments we see later on to happen still. I have PLANS for those developments :))) 

And so I’m going to hook into the events here (and the Itachi backstory) only enough so I can later use those hooks. 

 

EDIT (July 22): A very, very beautiful soul made an artwork for the last scene in this chapter, I've included it below. *cries a bit*

Chapter Text

 

 

“Kakashi, thank you for coming.”

 

Kakashi bows his head, kneeling in front of the Sandaime. Halting the thought that thanking him implies choice… which he really does not have. Still. It is courteous. He clears his throat. “Sandaime-sama. What can I do for you.”

Sarutobi Hiruzen exhales, in a long rush. “I heard you walked through the Uchiha complex a while back.” With Naruto, he doesn’t add. 

Kakashi inclines his head. That has been almost a year ago. As if you do not know. “Yes.”

A pause. “What was your impression.” ‘What have you heard since then.’

Kakashi grimaces. “Tensions are high and rising, still. They have influenced the behavior of the children.”

Hiruzen nods. “I see.” He reaches for a cup of tea, shooting a look over at an aide. “There have been breaches of our barrier, repeatedly.” 

Kakashi frowns. “Without the alert going off? That should be impossible. Do we know who it is?”

Hiruzen’s eyes flash. “I believe we can smoke them out with a new jutsu I prepared.” He nods to an aide, who shows Kakashi a map with the supposed breaches. 

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “These points are suspiciously… unsuspicious.”

The Hokage hums in agreement. “Indeed.” He takes a sip of tea. “And no, we do not know who it is, as you noted, which is quite a feat. The specific locations keep changing, but they are all close to the Uchiha district. I would like you to visit them, try to find out if something about it seems off to you.” He puts the cup away with a sigh. “Since the situation is more than delicate already, I would like to ask you to do this... unofficially. With Itachi now having been promoted to a captain under Danzo’s command… it definitely needs to be.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “So… Just another walk?” With him?

Hiruzen answers his unspoken question silently. “Why don’t you take Guy-san with you this time?” In case of trouble, he doesn’t spell out.

Kakashi nods, once.

Hiruzen’s voice is dark. “Please make sure your investigation isn’t traced back to the Anbu.”

Of course.

 

 

 

He goes to find Guy, surprised when he finds Guy’s bright chakra signature at the academy’s headquarters.

Guy is in the teacher’s room, looking down at the next-year’s pupils, gathered in the playground below. Playing a few days a week to get to know each other. There’s a lot of screaming and arguing below and Kakashi chances a look, his heart thudding heavily in his chest. 

Naruto is there, green goggles on his head, yelling at Sasuke.

Desperately trying to get the attention of the boy he remembers. One he thought would maybe… become a friend.

Kakashi’s heart hurts as he sees Sasuke walk by, eyes averted, and Naruto’s cry turns angry, aggressive. Kakashi swallows, trying his best to keep his voice light as he forces himself to divert his attention, and addresses Guy. “What brings you to the academy?”

Guy points a thumb towards the kids. “My new appointment.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, lets his astonishment color his voice. “Sooo, you’re gonna look after a few genin, huh?” Guy is going to be a Jonin leader… I guess it is too much to hope you will get his team. He grimaces, angry at himself. He’s not even entered, Guy won’t get him, baka.

Naruto is still screaming at Sasuke down below, still trying his attention. 

Kakashi sighs to himself, and then smirks, wryly. He definitely has endurance… even if it may be ill-advised. He turns to Guy. “Hey, come with me, alright?” He swallows, trying to convey the importance of this simple request. “Let’s just… take a walk.”

They never take just walks. It’s always some kind of mission, or some kind of rivalry game. 

But walks?

He can see Guy’s dark eyes spark, definitely getting the undertone and meaning and he smiles to himself and then eye-smiles at Guy when he falls in step next to him.

 

Guy, of course, pretends he is alright again - after the assassination mission he witnessed a while ago - but his dark eyes are still watchful, some of the childhood exuberance in his dealings with Kakashi gone.

Kakashi grimaces behind his mask, grimly. I’m sorry you had to witness that, back then, I really am.

He shoots a look at Guy, wondering. Is that what has driven you towards teaching? Leading a genin team?  He remembers how Guy had saved him when he had broken down, panicked, at the beginning of his Anbu career still. I’ve been a lousy friend, haven’t I. I’ve been so preoccupied with my own… dilemma. He blinks. Time to pick up our old rivalry again, at some point.

 

He sighs softly, dismissing the thoughts for now, and indicating the apartment complex he visited with Naruto a few months back. Has it really been half a year already? The academy entry is soon? Time flies, indeed. “Used to come here quite a bit.”

The memory of seeing Obito try to kiss the picture of Rin is a warm one, albeit tinged with bitterness. Chocolate. He swallows, trying not to remember the frantic beating of her heart against his hand. Rin. I never really saw you. You were alway there, but we overshadowed you, drowned out your personality. I know Sensei Minato saw you though. Cherished you. I wish I had known you better. He inhales, tries to get past the constriction in his chest. I miss you all so much.

 

Guy hums next to him, drawing him back to the present. “You miss it?”

Kakashi sends him a eye-quick smile, grateful for the seemingly offhand but well-meaning and aware comment. “Yes, I guess I do. This part was a thriving center of Konoha, just a few years back. The Uchiha are the founding clan with the Senju clan after all… “ He trails off, unwilling to add anything negative to that statement, aware that they are being listened to. 

Guy points at a small shop, deliberate awe in his voice. “Now that is a rice cracker shop with real character.” He walks over, buys a bunch. With a lot of exuberance.

Kakashi almost snorts, staying on the almost empty street to watch him. “They used to have lots of these special little shops here.” Back then, when there was so much traffic here.

Guy turns to him, chewing loudly. “So those are special?”

Kakashi smirks softly. “There are other specialties you can only find here, too.” Like eyes.

He inhales deeply, indicating the red gate far down the road. “Let’s go up to the shrine for a moment.”

 

There’s a familiar figure near the entrance and Kakashi smirks behind his mask. Coincidence, coincidence. I guess so much for not tracing this back to the Anbu. Sorry, Sandaime-sama. He looks up at the shrine, hands in his pocket. “Nakano shrine, home of the Uchiha’s patron deity.” Guy looks around and then exclaims suddenly, hurrying off to the side. Kakashi looks after him, his neck tingling.

Itachi steps out of the shadow, and addresses him, from behind. “Captain Kakashi. What are you doing here?”

Not beating around the bush, huh. Kakashi closes his eyes, dims his aura a bit more. “Just… thinking about something from the past.” It’s close enough to the truth. “How is being captain?” Under Danzo. 

Itachi’s voice is flat. “It’s the same.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. That bad, huh. He touches his tongue to his left fang for a moment.I see there have been renovations happening since the last time I was here.They both know that’s simply false, and Itachi hesitates, looking away for a moment. Scanning.

He turns to Kakashi, his voice soft. “Unfortunately, the base is compromised, so we will need to rebuild the shrine at some point. Which is a shame, because I would like to show it to my little brother, someday.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, catching on immediately. “I see. Rebuilding will make it stronger and more beautiful, will it… not?” There’s something in the air between them, for a moment, heavy and … metallic.

Words, almost spoken.

A request, on the tip of a tongue.

 

Give me a bit more, Itachi.

Let me… help you.

 

Itachi looks at him from the corner of his eyes, his face averted. He opens his mouth, but Guy intervenes, startling them both, happily showing Kakashi a ticket he got. And which promises fortune. “Hey Kakashi, check it out!” 

Kakashi averts his gaze for just a moment, to pretend to be interested.

When he looks back, Itachi is gone.

 

Damn.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He returns to the Sandaime, his stomach churning. 

His voice is almost rushed, but he doesn’t care, the sensation of imminent danger tingling at the base of his spine. “There’s not enough intel to figure out who the infiltrator is or what he wants.” What do they want? I bet Itachi knows. I bet he’s desperate to find a way out, too. To make the right decision. “We need to place agents at each section of the barrier system.” Everywhere. “Without anti infiltration tactics it will be almost impossible to find the culprit.” Are you being used, Itachi? Or is it politics? Something else? “The only thing we can do is ask the police to step up their patrols.”

The police. The Uchiha.

Kakashi grimaces, behind his mask.

Hiruzen sighs, his eyes almost resigned. “How was it?”

Kakashi shifts over to his other foot, tries to seem relaxed. “It was the first time in a while and the atmosphere had … changed.” Whatever happens, will happen soon. He knows the Sandaime understands.

The Hokage puts his hand on his chin, thinking for a moment, before he addresses Kakashi again. “Yes I see, well, you completed your mission, Kakashi.”

Have I though? Kakashi blinks, knowing he is dismissed.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He stands silently in the hallway in front of the Hokage’s office afterwards, trying to shake the sense of impending doom, this fluttering feeling that settles deep down in his guts. The feeling intensifying with the way he gets antsy when… nothing happens. No messengers. No calls on other ninja. 

No… action.

Sandaime-sama, what are you doing?

 

He wonders if he should go and search for Itachi, but knows it is futile, since Itachi obviously didn’t want to be found after their meeting at the shrine either.

And Kakashi had scanned with his Sharingan then.

 

He tries to swallow the dread down, desperate for something lighter, something… like sunlight.

 

He turns towards Naruto’s apartment, not daring to question his own impulse. I have been over way too few times anyways, all things considered. 

Konoha is almost silent this early evening, something like a collective anticipation suffusing it, the village metaphorically holding its breath. Kakashi shivers.

Since he is not in his Anbu uniform he launches himself up onto one of the roofs next to Naruto’s apartment, perching behind a wall and looks in, from afar.

 

He watches as the young boy plays with the shadows on the wall, his face sullen. Not a good day for you either, hmm? Naruto’s lower lip is sticking out, in a rather cute expression, in Kakashi’s admittedly biased opinion, the pout vaguely like Kushina’s was. Kakashi grins softly, letting his eyes wander, the memory a warm feeling for once. It’s already been over 7 years… There is a small scratch on Naruto’s hand, but nothing serious. The hair is sticking up into all directions. The apartment is a mess, cups of ramen and heaps of clothes everywhere. There is dust on the furniture, but the goggles are placed carefully next to the silvery scale and the marbles, and Kakashi smiles softly to himself.

Naruto throws himself onto his back with a huff, his t-shirt riding up and Kakashi frowns, the black seal visible, indicating that Naruto is using the nine-tails power, probably unconsciously. Kakashi watches intently, and then quirks an eyebrow as the wound on Naruto’s hand heals, the seal fading a moment after.

I… see.

Naruto shifts to hug his pillow in a fetal position, and there is a small sniffle, tugging at Kakashi’s soul. And then Naruto begins to cry, silently, heart-wrenchingly.

 

Kakashi closes his eyes to the painful sobs that break out, eventually, fueled by desperate loneliness and disappointment, and he flees, his heart beating in his throat.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He drops silently to the ground in Iruka’s small garden, inhaling harshly, trying to breathe.

 

Iruka’s smile lights up and Kakashi cannot help smile back, wobbly, embracing him when he gets up from his reading position on the porch.

He inhales deeply, his eyes brimming with unshed tears, Iruka’s smell soothing something deep within him, his hands cramping in the cloth of Iruka’s shirt. The words are impossible to contain, impossible to ignore, breaking out of him with the devastating clarity and horror of truth. “I love you, Iruka.” I might have loved you right from the start. He smiles wobbly once more. At least I‘ve realized it after almost three years. 

Iruka freezes for a moment, and then starts threading his fingers through Kakashi’s hair, arching a bit up, his mouth pressed on the skin under Kakashi’s ear. Kakashi can hear the smile in his voice. And the breathlessness. “That is good, because… I just might love you too.”

 

Kakashi sobs and the tears fall and Iruka pulls down his mask and Kakashi pulls him into a searing kiss, one filled with hope and sadness, and happiness and want and elation and a myriad of other feelings he cannot properly name. 

Iruka’s whispers in-between them, and Kakashi’s soul echoes. “I want you.” 

I want to be with you. I want… to have a family with you. It’s a litany of promises, and his tattoo tingles and Kakashi speaks into the kiss, ignoring how sloppy it gets around the words. “Despite it all?” Despite the tattoo and my fate and the fact that I am a killer?

Iruka smiles into the kiss, humming softly. “Despite it all.”

Fluttering hope, beating its wings, in Kakashi’s stomach. 

 

Kakashi stumbles towards the house with Iruka in his arms, and Iruka giggles, and the thought comes, so clear and so devastatingly simple, that the almost fathomless elation rushing through him makes him tremble. Maybe… this is what Minato wanted to happen? Wouldn’t this make sense? If I… found love and we could then be a family, with Naruto? Right?

His heart thuds and Iruka moans into him and Kakashi giggles too, happily, something in him breaking open.

I’ll… need to let him to get to know Naruto first though.

And then… we’ll see.

Iruka tilts his head, and sucks on his tongue, and Kakashi stops thinking.

Gladly.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

There is a knock on the window, in the dead of the night.

Kakashi extricates himself from Iruka’s arms, and nods at the Anbu in front of it. He dresses silently, smirking wryly when he realizes that almost all his clothes are here now, in Iruka’s house. And quite a few of his books, too. 

He jumps up and onto the roof, and Tenzou tilts his head, his voice amused. Nodding at the still snoring Iruka. “Good job there, exhausting him so much he doesn’t even hear the knock, Senpai.”

Kakashi snorts and laughs quietly, shaking his head. “Oh, shut up.” He sobers, inhaling deeply. “The Sandaime called?”

Tenzou nods. 

Kakashi lowers the dog mask and jumps.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Tenzou’s voice is low, dead. “This is horrible.”

Kakashi tries to stay calm, watches as his Anbu squad is staring, almost frozen to the spot. 

The scent of copper is everywhere, heavy and stifling. Drenched with the smell of feces, as the bodies’ muscles relax. 

He tries not to breathe so deeply. “What happened.”

What about that special jutsu you prepared, Sandaime? Why did you not use it? Kakashi frowns. Or… did you? But if you did…

Yugao bends down, her hand on a too small body. Her voice carries some relief. “Sandaime! There’s a survivor.”

Kakashi looks down, recognizes Sasuke as Yugao turns him, just slightly. Now, that is no coincidence. The dread in his stomach solidifies, settles. He scans the area with his Sharingan. “No-one else made it.”

The Hokage sighs, heavily, his voice brittle. “Take away all of the corpses.”

Kakashi frowns, realizing that there is no-one left now to decide what to do with the Sharingans in them. Except maybe…

Tenzou turns to him, his voice colored by horror. “Who do you think could have done something as monstrous as this?”

 

Danzo interjects, his voice clear and resolute. Knowing. “Itachi Uchiha. That is why he killed Shisui and took his eyes for his own.”

Shisui? He has heard of the incident of course, just a few days ago. The most promising young Uchiha throwing himself off a cliff. For Danzo to bring him up now…

Kakashi almost snorts, glowering from behind his mask. “But why would he…” No. I know he didn’t do this alone. I would bet my life on it. And it’s only tangentially related to tonight. I bet Danzo is involved somehow, though. And both he and the Sandaime alr…. He stops his own thought, his heart beating in his throat. 

Danzo looks at him coldly, not deigning to answer directly. “It would appear that this settles everything.”

The Hokage interjects, his voice heated. “Hear me Danzo, I can’t allow you to act on your own authority anymore.”

Danzo scoffs slightly, his voice incredulous. “I did this for…”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, you did what for…?, but the Sandaime cuts Danzo off. “What, for the good of the Leaf? …. Your Anbu and the Ne will be dissolved.”

Kakashi shifts his stance, expecting Danzo to argue, or even attack, anything, the threat of this not something he expects the powerful Ne leader to just accept, but Danzo only quirks an eyebrow and turns, walking away. His Ne Anbu follow him, leaving the Hokage’s behind.

Kakashi stares after him, his mind in turmoil. So you were involved in this… somehow. And the Sandaime did know. And he did nothing with my warning, did nothing to prevent this. What the hell?

 

Sarutobi Hiruzen sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose for a moment. “Yugao, please take the boy to the hospital. Kakashi, Tenzou, you and your squad please make sure all the corpses are accounted for and… whole before you burn them. We need to know exactly who, too.” He hesitates, looking at Kakashi for a long moment, as if on the verge of adding something, before obviously deciding against it. “I need to return to the tower.”

Kakashi blinks, something in this sentence seeming off. Is he meeting someone?

He does not have time to think about it though, not now, with his orders quite clear and the other Anbu watching, and so he bends down to the first woman he can reach, picking her up matter of factly, her expression horrified still, even in death.

There are wounds on the faces of a lot of the victims, suspiciously… precise wounds. 

Hiding the missing eyes. Why am I not surprised by that. He swallows harshly. What the ever loving hell happened here. He frowns, remembering that Sasuke survived. What kind of deal did you strike, Itachi.

Kakashi has a bad, bad feeling about it all. 

 

He nods at his squad and then jumps up and over the roofs to the investigative unit’s headquarters, knowing they will be able to put names to the mangled bodies.

 

And discern just how many Sharingan eyes they are missing, after this fateful night.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

The sky is lighting up again when they are finally done collecting bodies and sealing houses, and he sends his Anbus home, glad when the debriefing only takes a moment. 

He’s not sure he could stand being for too long in the presence of the Hokage right now anyway, the knowledge of what he knows and what he was allowed to witness gnawing at him. He’s also pretty sure Danzo is still a force to be reckoned with. And that the Ne will continue to exist, one way or another.

 

He decides to go by Naruto once more on a whim, finding him still curled around the pillow, eyes puffy. Kakashi blinks and then just cannot, drawn like a moth to a flame. 

 

I know this pain.

I know it, too well.

 

He climbs in through the window, drawn like a moth to a flame. Naruto’s blue eyes blink open as if sensing his presence, his whole face lighting up, though the smile is wobbly. “Sukea…” He reaches with one hand, and Kakashi takes his hand with a sigh, and then steps up and over him onto the bed, spooning behind him. 

The boy sighs in his arms and draws their linked hands up and to his chest, Kakashi’s throat touching the still wet spot on the pillow. 

 

Kakashi inhales deeply, the sunshine smell shaking some of the gloominess of this night, threading in with the love he felt earlier with Iruka and Kakashi smiles, softly, something in him trying to… dare. To evaluate. Maybe, just maybe this village will come to rest now for a while.

And if that happens… maybe the Sandaime won’t need me anymore, will he. Maybe he won’t be as careful with the village’s Jinchuriki anymore, either.

Kakashi smiles painfully, silently cursing the Anbu mask which prevents him from burying his nose into the golden hair. He holds Naruto as the breaths deepen out once more, his soul strangely quiet and the small body in his arms a furnace, thawing the icy dread in his heart, slowly, with every beat of it. 

 

The morning comes with the sun streaming in and lighting Naruto’s hair up like a halo, and Kakashi tightens his fingers, wishing to be able to do this, this experience of giving and receiving comfort, every day. 

Every night. 

 

He makes Naruto scrambled eggs and rice for breakfast when he wakes just after sunrise, enjoying the smiles, and then makes him clean the apartment, ignoring the whining. He shoves Naruto into the shower after and then tries to comb that hair, and Kakashi first curses and then laughs while he does so, because it’s tedious and gets tangled again right away, and it’s thick like hers and wavy like his and Naruto really has to get a better brush.

 

He hugs Naruto a long moment before he leaves, promising to come back soon, and he means it too. He drops down into Iruka’s house to find him still in bed, and throws his armor and mask onto the chair in the corner, burrowing back into the sheets, easily, immediately. 

Iruka’s grin chases away the ghosts of the night, pressing a kiss to Kakashi’s nose. And then he sniffs and groans and gets up and drags a slightly embarrassed Kakashi to the shower, and it turns playful and … it’s not Kakashi’s fault that Iruka is really late for his lessons today, is it.

Well. Maybe it is.

But he refuses to feel bad about that.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He returns to the district in the afternoon, ignoring the tape, wandering the streets still filled with the odor of death. 

He looks up at Obito’s little apartment, his heart aching viciously. Obito, what have I been doing? With my life? With the gift you gave me? He blinks, looking around the silent street. All the life here is gone now. Snuffed out in a single night. He looks back up. I have a chance to actually have a life now though, Obito, would you believe it. Something… someone to live for even. 

He swallows, allowing the thought, that this weird twist of fate had intended he should have had that with Naruto, but this … thing with Naruto feels so distant. Like a fairy tale. He swallows, and looks up at the blue sky, the heavens uncaringly and almost spiteful beautiful today. I need to get out of the Anbu, and actually live.

I need to get rid of the pain I deal out.

In his mind, a little raven-haired boy with blue goggles grins at him, giving him a thumbs up.

 

Kakashi exhales, deliberately blowing away the stench of death.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kakashi watches, hidden on a roof once more, as parents and children mingle excitedly in front of the academy gates. The first day has just concluded and the children get picked up by their excited parents, the whole event quite joyously tumultuous.

 

Naruto is sitting astride on the swing across the yard, glumly watching the commotion. His knuckles are white on the ropes, and his eyes are… dead.

 

Kakashi swallows, harshly. He sees as Naruto tracks Sasuke’s way off the courtyard, Sasuke’s head held high, seemingly uncaring and fawned over by several little girls. Kakashi knows that Sasuke has held up quite well after the massacre, at least to the outside watcher. Inside… that may be another story. Nara Shikamaru seems annoyed by all the attention his mother directs at him, while a boy named Kiba is preening with pride. A little girl with huge lilac eyes is watching Naruto though and Kakashi frowns, his Anbu education supplying the name. Hyuuga Hinata. He grimaces, remembering the more than special training and rules in Konoha’s probably most powerful family. Another child with a harsh childhood. Despite actually having parents. 

 

A little pink-haired girl catches his attention, hugging the blond heiress of the Yamanaka clan. Who seems to be not overly happy with that, reluctantly hugging back, and Kakashi chuckles softly. There is a boy looking suspiciously like Guy running around and Kakashi groans, shaking his head at his old friend. Really? Pushing that green spandex onto someone else? He snorts, unable to help himself. 

 

Movement catches his attention and he watches as Naruto drags himself off the swing and shuffles off the now emptying yard, hands in his pockets, seemingly frail and so little.

He’s still quite small for his almost 8 years, but Kakashi would bet a month’s salary that there will be a growth spurt incoming at some point, with his father almost at 180cm after all.

 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, his hand fumbling with the package in his pocket. He had taken the scale on his last visit after trying so hard to brush Naruto’s hair, and had brought it to a brush-maker, asking him to use it as an inlay for the back. And a really sturdy brush head. The brush-maker had taken the scale and hat set it into the back of the brush in the shape of a flower, with lots of little opal fragments around it, the clear lacquer surface letting it sparkle in every color whenever it is hit by the sun. 

It’s pretty, and it carries a delicate touch. And it sparkles.

Kakashi is sure that Naruto will like it.

He is also sure he will recognize who it is from.

Even without a gift card.

 

Still. 

I’d give a lot to be able to give it to him directly.

 

He drops it off on Naruto’s table just as Naruto stumbles into the apartment.

Kakashi leaves through the kitchen window, and leaves it open, on a gut feeling.

He looks back just as Naruto looks up and sees the window, and his whole face lights up and Kakashi turns and flees, a sob stuck in his throat. 

 

He still hears the cry of joy when Naruto finds the gift, and grins, despite it all.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kakashi never asks Iruka how the first weeks of the new school year are.

Kakashi knows Iruka struggles, every time he sees the whiskers. 

 

Kakashi kneads his shoulders in the evenings, and strokes his skin until he relaxes again, finally.

He also knows that the Sandaime talks to Iruka at some point, the silent communication passing between them as the Hokage asks Kakashi who had taken Naruto into class a rather long one. 

Kakashi is grateful for it. At least something.

 

He knows Iruka is warming a bit up to Naruto afterwards, as difficult as the little boy apparently is. Kakashi frowns when Iruka starts telling of Naruto’s troubles in school after a while, silently surmising that Naruto is feeling like an outcast still. And fights for attention.

Worse even. He had set his hopes into having friends, and maybe even having a specific friend, but the massacre has turned that chance null and void. 

And the other parents keep their children away from the Jinchuriki. 

Kakashi grimaces, his heart aching. 

What can I possibly do?

 

His thoughts keep returning to that question.

He starts when he realizes that Iruka is talking to him now, and grimaces, scratching his head a bit sheepishly. “I’m sorry, I seem to have spaced out over dinner. Please forgive me. Could you repeat that?”

Iruka huffs, but in a kind way, pointing his chopsticks. “I said, I talked to the Sandaime about you.”

Kakashi blinks. “You did?”

Iruka raises his eyebrows, his eyes sparkling. “I did. The other day we were doing Kanji in class and I…”, he hesitates, smiling softly, “I recognized the quirky motion Naruto does on the upstroke. You do the same.” 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, vaguely amused. “I do?” And Naruto picked it up from me?

Iruka chuckles softly, putting a bit of rice into his mouth, speaking around it, rather gleefully. “You do.” He grins. “It’s actually quite endearing.” He sobers slowly, reaching for a piece of carrot. “However, it made me realize that you are in fact quite a good teacher. And I know a lot of the Jonin class ninja teach a Genin team at some point or the other. And I…” He hesitates, his big eyes boring into Kakashi’s for a moment. “And I know you want to leave the Anbu.”

Kakashi swallows, looking down into his bowl. “That transparent, huh.”

Iruka smiles gently. “Just to me.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. He tries to keep his voice level. “So. What did he say?”

Iruka shrugs, with a sigh. “Nothing much. ‘Thank you, Iruka-san’.” He quotes, fingers in the air and Kakashi chuckles, drily. 

He sobers slowly, shrugging lightly. “Well, we’ll see what he makes of it I guess.”

Iruka looks at him with a glint in his eye. “You haven’t really said if you’d like that? I mean, are you okay with me giving out this kind of… reference? Suggestion?”

Kakashi looks away for a moment, his eyes dark. “How could I not be? I mean…” He looks back at Iruka, laughing softly, tinged with self-deprecation. “I don’t really see myself as a teacher, but of course I would…” Love to leave. He doesn’t say it. He frowns, finishing in other words. “Embrace the chance.” Whatever it might be.

Iruka smiles at him. “Okay.”

Kakashi leans in a bit. “Imagine if I would really be your colleague though.”

Iruka groans, eyes widening almost comically. “Oh god.”

Kakashi snickers. “Sitting next to you, asking you what you’re doing every second of the day….” He leans in a bit more, draws his nose along Iruka’s throat. “Wanting to touch you, always, coming in and kissing you in class.”

Iruka sighs softly, tilting his neck to let Kakashi get at the spot that always makes him break out into goosebumps, his voice somewhat labored already. “Sneaking out of the teacher’s lounge to hide in a closet and make out…”

Kakashi licks along the spot and then whispers in his ear, grinning. “Or sending Kage Bunshin to do our work while we head home early to fuck our brains out.”

Iruka groans, his scent rising intoxicatingly. His voice is breathless. “You would be so bad for my career.”

Kakashi snickers and then takes the chopsticks from him and throws them on the table before pulling him back and onto the floor.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“Tell me Kakashi, how many years have you been in the Anbu?”

Kakashi’s is kneeling on the roof of the tower, head lowered. He frowns, thinking back. “I joined the Yondaime’s tenure, so about … 10 years.”

Ten long years, full of death.

The Sandaime nods, looking away. “I have thought long and hard about your service. I believe the Yondaime was very wise when he tried to keep you close. But I also believe that it won’t do you good any further. In fact, I believe it will darken your heart.” Even further hangs in the air, unsaid.

The Sandaime turns to him. “Take off your mask.”

Kakashi does as he is asked, refusing to let his limbs shake, offering the mask to the Hokage.

Sarutobi Hiruzen looks down at it, his face seemingly very old. The Sandaime searches Kakashi’s eyes for long moments, the sorrow in them deep. “Maybe I have asked too much of you.” It’s as much of an apology as he’ll ever get and Kakashi swallows, suddenly breathless. 

 

Sarutobi Hiruzen takes the mask and throws it high up in the air and away.

Kakashi swallows harshly, again, following the arc of the mask, resigning himself to go and look for it later, unwilling to part with this huge a part of his life this way. He knows the Hokage meant for it to be a big, theatrical cut, but he’s a bit pissed nonetheless, forcing himself to keep on listening.

“You are hereby relieved of your duties as Anbu and will assume a new position. You will be a Jonin leader.”

Relief rushes through Kakashi, so potent he almost falls down, his head spinning. 

Hiruzen’s voice is soft. “I’m also debating amending my decision regarding Naruto. Jiraiya has sent word back that Itachi has joined a group named the Akatsuki, which is apparently the same group Orochimaru was part of, too. Orochimaru has dropped out of it voluntarily, which is interesting. Jiraiya is worried that Itachi is apparently sent into villages with a bijou.”

That is… unsettling. Kakashi exhales, shaking his head once. “So, I may go to him without mask?” May I protect him properly.

The Sandaime exhales as well, his white robes rustling. “Not yet. I will call on you.”

 

 

Kakashi doesn’t realize he’s alone for a long while.

When he finally does he pushes up with laden limbs, and goes and retrieves his mask, feeling slightly out of body. There’s a smile, on his lips though, a trembling one he cannot shake. He puts the mask away, under his bed, in his unused apartment.

I… need it, at least one more time. 

 

And then… hopefully never again.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He keeps away from the other Jonin leaders during the first weeks, his mind churning with memories. Minato’s soft eyes, Obito’s smile. Rin’s kindness. Me? A Jonin leader in charge of genin?

Kakashi cannot really remember when he has been this terrified. 

If I … do something wrong I could get these kids killed or maimed, or hurt or all of that.

Traumatized. 

 

I… am I truly capable of being in charge of a group of genin?

He swallows, harshly. Be careful what you wish for, indeed.

He shakes his head. How could you stand it, Sensei?

 

He tells Iruka of his fears when he comes home, haltingly and yet almost frantically, and Iruka stares for a long moment and then laughs at him, kissing the indignant expression off of Kakashi, still chortling. When he can finally speak again he grins at Kakashi, broadly, and his eyes sparkle, like stars. “Oh I love you, Hatake Kakashi.” He spreads his arms in a big shrug. “And, welcome to the club!” He snickers.

Kakashi harrumphs and then growls at him, playfully, and some of the fear dissolves into simple nerves, still churning within him, but tinged with relief now, somehow. I’ll never let you go, Umino Iruka.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

There is a small cake with a single candle on the table on September 15th, and Kakashi looks at it, feeling dangerously unmoored. Iruka embraces him from behind, pushing his nose into Kakashi’s nape. “Happy birthday, love.”

Kakashi’s throat clicks as he swallows, turning to press a kiss to Iruka’s lips. He whispers. “Thank you.”

Iruka hums, nudging his nose with his own. “Ready for your present?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, shrugging. “Okay?”

Iruka grins, reaching for a little box on the counter. He holds it in his palm for a moment, inhaling deeply. “I wanted to find a present for you that conveys how… deeply happy I am to share my life with you for the last almost four years. I could not wish for a better partner. And… I know that you are about to test your Genin team, and… I went and asked the Sandaime what kind of tests were done and he told me about this test that was passed down from him to Jiraiya-sama and then to Minato-sama and… he gave this box to me.” He swallows, his eyes huge on Kakashi’s. “Apparently, he took it from their home when they… emptied the house.” 

Kakashi blinks, trying to hold the tears back, to no avail. His hand is shaking when he reaches for the box, the soft jingling sounds making something in him break. The bells are glinting in the light, beautiful and frail somehow, coming with a rush of memories.

He tries and fails to form the words, falling into the offered embrace like a drowning man, gulping in Iruka’s scent in heaving breaths. 

Iruka holds him, tightly, for a long time. 

 

 

They’re both late for their work that day. 

 

Again.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

One month later Kakashi celebrates Naruto’s 8th birthday with him.

The Anbu mask is still firmly in place, something that really grates on Kakashi’s nerves, since the Sandaime has not called for him for weeks. Did you not wish for me to interact with him?

 

He keeps the anger out of his voice.

Watches as Naruto inhales the small cake with the silver frosting. 

The new orange outfit is way too big on him still. It will probably take years for him to grow into it, the sleeves folded back twice. But he loves it and ultimately, that is all that matters. 

 

Naruto smiles at him, a huge fake smile, telling him of aaaaaall of his friends in the academy. Whining about how much of an ass one Uchiha Sasuke is, with all the girls fawning over him. Kakashi chuckles, makes sympathetic noises in all the right places, all the while just watching the mobile face, the whiskers quivering whenever Naruto grins, defiantly. 

How the eyes are so blue, and kind, so similar to Minato’s. And yet… carry that slant that is vaguely like Kushina’s.

He tries not to stare, knows he’s failing.

Naruto doesn’t seem to mind though.

 

Naruto never complains how rarely ‘Sukea’ is coming by either. 

And he never mentions the way he clung to Kakashi’s hand that morning.

 

Kakashi’s heart aches, the pain twisting and sharp.

 

He knows that the Anbu know he’s here. 

He knows they are only… allowing it.

It is forbidden to wear the uniform if you are not an active Anbu, for obvious reasons.

 

Tenzou had stepped out of the shadows and had looked at him, from two roofs over.

The message had been… clear.

 

So now I have to break your heart.

 

I hope I will be able to make it up to you soon.

 

 

The words are viciously hard to speak, burning his throat. “There is something I have to tell you, Naruto.”

Naruto blinks up at him, mouth smeared with frosting, grinning still. Kakashi inhales and something breaks in Naruto’s gaze, knowing, sensing, anticipating and Kakashi grimaces, behind his mask. 

Naruto beats him to it, his little voice beyond brave. “You cannot come anymore, I understand.”

No, you don’t. Kakashi draws a shaking hand over his mask. “Naruto, I…” He clears his throat, looking away for a second. “I… this was not up to me.”

Naruto blinks at him, the tears gathering already. He angrily wipes at them, smiling broadly. “Don’t worry, Sukea, I will be alright. I always am.”

FUCKING SHIT. Kakashi tries to breathe, tries to explain, but he doesn’t know how, the chocolate taste in his mouth intensifying by the second.

He knows he will drop unconscious if he should push it and if he does that Naruto will lift the mask and that will lead to even worse consequences and so Kakashi balls his fists, pushing the pain down. And the words that want to spill, though what he does manage to say comes from his soul, too. “I’m sorry.”

Naruto looks at his plate, pushing at the few remaining crumbs there. “I don’t think I like the cake after all.”

Kakashi wants to snort at the small jab, but it hurts quite viciously, indeed. He nods instead, pressing the words out. “I see.”

He pushes up, slowly, and activates the recording function of his Sharingan for long moments, recording how Naruto looks away for a while and then looks up at him, haltingly, his eyes full of feelings, his golden hair a spiky halo in the low October afternoon sun. He slowly reaches into his back pocket and withdraws the slingshot, offering it to Naruto, willing his fingers to stop trembling.

 

Kakashi waits until he takes it, reluctantly, and then reaches out to ruffle Naruto’s hair once more. Tries to record the feeling, too. “Don’t shoot it at your teachers.” Please.

Naruto looks down at it, sniffing. And then he takes it and fastens it to his left shoulder patch, the Uzumaki swirl patch, his little fingers lingering on it for a moment. Silent.

 

And Kakashi bends down over him, pushes his Anbu mask up and his other one down, and presses a kiss onto Naruto’s forehead, the golden hair tickling. He whispers against the skin. “Brush your hair.” 

 

I will count the days.

 

And he is gone, swearing he can hear both their hearts break, like glass.

 

 

 

 

 

And the world is red, blood red, and hurting.

 

 

 

Chapter 8: Breath of life and pain

Notes:

Someone noted in the comments that it would be the perfect time to have ‘Sukea’ appear for the first time now. And… I had thought about it (because, yes, timing-wise it would be!).

But Sukea is a tongue-in-cheek camouflage, a small prank that Kakashi allows himself to pull on other people. 

Kakashi here, at this moment… is not in the emotional equilibrium to tease imho. And to use another thing to hide himself in his interactions with Naruto, not when he expected to be finally allowed to unmask.

That is why I decided against it here.

Sukea will still make an entrance a bit later on, no worries, and of course Kakashi’s Anbu visits will have their own… implications. :) 

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

His first team fails the test, with flying colors.

 

He knows the Sandaime is watching, but he couldn’t care less, he’s feeling enraged with the way the kids try to take each other out, instead of him, his beautiful, history-heavy bells-test turning into a mockery of its purpose. 

 

He turns on his heel, hands in pockets, his one visible eye dark. “You all fail.”

 

He is still so pissed and moody in the evening that Iruka throws him out, for once. 

Kakashi cannot help himself, he feels almost glad about that, the possibility to wallow in self-pity for a while impossible to pass by somehow. 

He’s not ignorant of his own darkness and what has brought this on of course. He knows that his mood these last months has been bad, and he knows why, too. 

 

He’s still not called on me. 

He grimaces, the phantom taste there for a long moment.

Iruka has actually been a saint through it all, understanding and kind. Trying. While also working through his own issues with the little boy who is the reason for it all. And who he has to interact with, on a daily basis, thanks to Kakashi.

But even he got fed up, eventually, inescapably.

 

Kakashi draws himself up into a sitting position, his jaw clenched. He balls his fists on the blanket with the shuriken pattern, staring ahead. I have no intention of making people who don’t work as a team into Shinobi.

 

The moonlight is cold and his soul feels like it, too.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He watches the academy’s outdoor training, from afar.

Drawn to it, again and again.

Grins behind his mask at Iruka’s exasperation and downright fear when one of the shuriken thrown whirls by way too close for comfort.

 

Naruto and Sasuke are both posing off of each other, Naruto loud and belligerent, Sasuke cool and aloof. But they are drawn to each other, circling each other and Kakashi narrows his eyes, wondering about this obvious pull. Is it really just this one encounter, years ago now? Or is it… more. 

He sighs, letting his eyes drift over the pupils. Hyuuga Hinata, Yamanaka Ino. Inuzuka Kiba, Aburame Shino, Akimichi Choji, Nara Shikamaru, Haruna Sakura, to name a few. He knows the names now, thanks to Iruka telling him about them, often. It’s a wild mix for this class and it’s… perfect. Kakashi swallows, his eyes returning to his lover. 

Who is yelling at Naruto for almost hitting him right now, but Kakashi can see that there is something like a helpless grin on his lips too, hidden beneath the hand in which he hides his face. Kakashi smirks softly as well, knowing Iruka is slowly warming to the little, obnoxious, cute little boy. 

 

Who carries his heart like a shield, daring anyone to batter it.

And whose soul properly breathes under Iruka’s care, for the first time. 

Obviously.

 

He turns his gaze to Naruto now, who is shuffling his feet in front of Iruka, embarrassed.

And who suddenly grins broadly up at him and Kakashi’s heart gives a painful thud at seeing the two people he loves so much close to each other. And he sees Iruka smile down at Naruto, somewhat overwhelmed and reluctant, but unable to stay mad. 

Kakashi chuckles softly, knowing that feeling well. 

 

He sighs, looking up at the sun, knowing he has to go and test another, his next team once more at some point. 

Minato’s bells jingle softly in the box in his pocket. Thank you, Iruka.

He jumps up, with a last look back, and another shuriken whirring way too close to Iruka’s face. He chuckles to himself, able to hear the subsequent yelling for quite some time.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Another team, a year later, a year in which Kakashi had led missions, and had watched only, increasingly furious. At least it hadn’t been assassination missions anymore. The genin in the middle is tied to the wooden pole, the other two eating ravenously. They had been rude and rule-following, a weird combination. The genin tied up even tells them to stick to the rules and Kakashi sighs, heavily. 

Obito… I … can’t.

 

He tries to feel something beyond disappointment. “You stuck to the rules. You’re all going back to the academy to figure it out.”

 

He leaves them there, ire burning through him. 

Iruka takes one look at him and tells him to sleep in his apartment that night.

Kakashi growls and turns around, hands balled to fists, deep in his pockets.

He cannot bring himself to join Kurenai and Guy, and Asuma.

 

He calls his nin-ken and runs until his muscles burn instead.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kakashi chops vegetables, side by side with Iruka. Their arms touch from time to time and there’s this soft tingling between them, promising more, later, but it’s sedate, easy, a soft glow. 

Iruka tilts his head, his voice low. “You know, the four years at the academy draw to an end soon…. And … The Sandaime came by and has asked me to… care for Naruto.”

Kakashi blinks, frowning for a moment. “He has?” He has what?

Iruka shrugs, cleaning a carrot. “We went to the memorial, and he… reminded me that Naruto and I are actually quite similar, in regards to experience. It reminded me of the fact that you, too, have similar experiences… I…” He hesitates, turning his face up and at Kakashi. “I… you know that I got to know Naruto these last years and… I now know what you meant, back then.”

He smiles softly, his brown eyes warm. “He really is innocent.”

Kakashi hums. “And loud, obnoxious, demanding, clumsy, irreverent and unpredictable.”

Iruka chuckles. “Indeed. He’ll be a hell of a ninja one day.” He smirks and bumps into Kakashi’s shoulder. “With the right… Sensei.”

Kakashi snorts. “He’ll be hell in a hand basket.”

Iruka grins and then sobers, turning back to the carrot. “He needs a family.”

 

The statement hangs in the air between them, heavy and stifling and light, and Kakashi cannot breathe, the idea he had so long ago almost tangible, right there. 

He tries to stay calm, and fails, by a mile. “You mean…”

Iruka smiles softly. “We should wait until he’s graduated. It could be our gift to him?”

Kakashi drops the knife and turns and kisses Iruka, knowing he’s proposing. “Yes?”

Iruka chuckles into the kiss, tasting of love and life and future. “Yes.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi wanders through Konoha, hands in his pockets, feeling… weird.

The high of his and Iruka’s decision has been mellowed by Naruto’s failing the final test, again and again, and the concern that Naruto might actually fail and miss his opportunity to get into one of the teams with his current classmates weighs heavily on Kakashi’s soul. 

Iruka tells him that his friend Mizuki has assured him that he thinks Naruto will be just fine, but that he is concerned as well, but unable to do anything about it. ‘Creating Bunshin is a basic ninja ability, you simply need it for so many tactics. I cannot lower the criteria for him, Kaka-kun.’

 

Lower the criteria… I cannot do that either.

Kakashi looks up at Minato’s stone face, the grave granite expression overlaid by his memory of kind eyes and a soft smile, whenever Minato had looked at him. At us all. 

He sighs.  Sensei Minato, is my way wrong?

 

“Sensei Kakashi!”

He starts, looking down to see his old teams, his failed teams, beaming up at him. 

The boy who had riled the others up to fight amongst themselves back then grins up at him. “We are now in charge of disciplinary measures at the academy. You let us fail and we sat down and really thought about it all, and we changed!”

They grin up at him and then the team that had been so rude bows down low and the others follow suit and Kakashi blinks, touched. 

 

He sends them off and then looks back up at Minato’s face, wryly smirking to himself.

A teacher trains his students and in turn learns from them.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He runs to the hospital, his heart thudding in his chest. The nurse points towards the room and he just continues running, unable to think, skidding to a halt in front of Iruka’s bed. His voice is breathless. “What…”

Iruka is pale, but he chuckles, wincing. Quoting him. “Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. They’re only shallow.”

Kakashi wants to smack him. And kiss him. And yell at him. It must transmit, because Iruka holds up his hand, cups Kakashi’s face. “It’s alright, love. I just… had to protect Naruto. I got stabbed in the back, but it’s not as bad as it looks, and they’re going to heal it properly as soon as the antibiotics take.”

Kakashi exhales, and there’s a sob stuck somewhere in his throat. He swallows harshly. “What happened.”

Iruka smirks, lowering his voice, with a quick look to the door. “Our little orange boy was used by Mizuki to steal a forbidden scroll… but instead of handing it over he went and learned the jutsu it contained.”

Kakashi snorts, but frowns. “Oh, I shudder to ask. Which one?”

Iruka quirks an eyebrow. “Kage Bunshin.”

Kakashi raises his own. “Oh? That is the forbidden one designed by Hokage Senju Tobirama…” 

Iruka nods, wincing again when the motion pulls at the wound in his back. “Mh hmmm. And he has perfected it, you should’ve seen it. He literally conjured hundreds of Kage Bunshin and beat Mizuki up.”

Kakashi’s eyebrows rise even further. “Hundreds?” My own limit is at five….

Iruka chuckles, shifting a bit in the bed to get even closer. “There is a lot of potential in him. And not just because of… the fox.”

It’s the first time that Iruka directly acknowledges the fact that Naruto carries it, allows it, even. Kakashi smiles softly. “I’m glad. And I‘m sorry about Mizuki.”

Iruka sighs, his hand dropping down to take Kakashi’s right. He threads their fingers together. “I’m going to take Naruto out for ramen tonight, and give him his headband.” He chuckles. “Actually, I’m gonna give him mine, I bet he’ll love that. And then, maybe, we can start on all the paperwork tomorrow and then tell him?”

Kakashi blinks, the tear falling, unbidden. “Sure.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Iruka comes home, late that night, and a shiver runs down Kakashi’s spine.

There is something about him, dark and swirling.

 

Kakashi pastes a smile on his face, reaches for him from their bed. “How was it, love?”

 

Iruka sits down on the bed, slowly, his back turned to Kakashi. Kakashi pushes himself up, slowly, his heart beating in his throat. 

Iruka’s voice is soft. Resigned. “He was so happy. He ate way too much, and literally dozed off on the stool at Ichiraku’s, which is no surprise, after this day we’ve had.”

He trails off, looking up at the moon just visible behind the mountain for long moments. “I carried him home. Put him to bed.”

He chuckles softly, and Kakashi blinks, unable to understand why it sounds so sad. 

Iruka sniffs. “He clung to me, the little face exuding so much…. happiness.” He chuckles again, inhaling deeply. “I took his jacket off. Naruto insisted on showing off his new jutsu just one more time and I laughed and told him to go ahead, and he did, and … his shirt rode up when he threw his arms in the air, jubilant when the clone materialized and… the seal was there.” 

He trails off again, silent for a long moment. Kakashi cannot breathe. Iruka tilts his head back a bit, towards him, his voice almost inaudible. “It’s black. I recognized the ink. I… I put him to bed, silently, and … he fell asleep right away, and I walked out as if in a daze. My… feet carried me to the tower.”

Kakashi exhales shudderingly, squeezing his eyes shut. Dreading.

Iruka sniffs again, his voice dropping to a whisper. “The Sandaime was kind enough to sit me down, and press a cup of tea into my hands… he confirmed to me that the Yondaime did the seal in red. With that ink. And that it turned black that night, when the Anbu arrived at the scene.”

 

Kakashi’s voice is unrecognizable even to himself. “And you realized.”

Iruka presses into the bridge of his nose, harshly. “Why didn’t you tell me.”

Kakashi barks a laugh. “Tell you what. That I’ve been promised to someone in then more or less twenty years time, by some obscure fortune-telling ink? That my Sensei made a gamble with fate and death and it apparently paid off?” His voice raises, but he cannot help himself, the bitterness rising with it once more. “That I’m forbidden to talk about it all to Naruto? That the Sandaime sealed my ability to tell him anything before he is of age? That I am forbidden to interact with him properly for now, still?”

He trails off, angrily wiping at his eyes. He looks at Iruka’s stiff back, his mind frantic. His voice carries a pleading undertone, but he doesn’t care. “That you are the best thing that’s ever happened to me, that I love you and that nothing of this changes anything for me? That it is my only wish to stay with you and adopt him and become a family with you and him?”

 

Iruka is silent for a long time, and Kakashi is unable to reach for him, his whole body feeling frozen. When he finally speaks Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, and presses his hands to his ears, but he cannot not listen, not hear. “I… You are not only family to Naruto, Kakashi. Whether it was fated or created or something else doesn’t matter. It is. And will be.” Iruka’s throat clicks as he swallows, driving the point home. “You cannot be only family to him.” His voice turns intense, arguing his point. “You know how it works, how strong the pull gets, when the soulmates are in close proximity. It would destroy us all, eventually, through longing first, and then shame, and finally guilt.” He pauses, his head tilting back to Kakashi, though his gaze is averted. “One way or another, you will be in close proximity, I just know it.” He shakes his head. “I… will be happy to only stay family to you two.” 

Kakashi gasps, his hands dropping to clutch his chest. “Stay only… family?”

Iruka smiles sadly. “Yes. I will be always here for you, for you both, but as an uncle, or a brother.” He looks back, finally, his eyes huge and puffy. “I cannot be your lover anymore. And you cannot be his father.”

 

Kakashi swallows the sob that wants to rise down, his chest hurting. His voice is raw. “You told me you wouldn’t let me go.” You promised.

Iruka‘s face crumbles, in abject pain. “I didn’t know. How could I.” He inhales deeply, his words accusing, but his tone carries nothing but understanding. “You should have told me.“

He smiles, a cute little smile that is in direct contrast to the pain in his eyes. He pushes up his sleeve, holding out his underarm for Kakashi to see. “I even had a tattoo made… the Leaf… it’s still red.” He swallows again, a tear trailing down his cheek. “I thought… I thought, if I tried then maybe I could twist fate, force it, somehow…”

 

Kakashi stares at the red lines, the skin still angry, the wound with the thousands of little stitches still oozing. He wants to reach out, to kiss the skin, to put ointment on it, to wipe the tears off, to hug Iruka.

He does not.

And you do not because you know he is right, baka. 

You know he is right. 

 

He’s right. 

 

He’s… right.  

The words keep echoing, harshly, and Kakashi closes his eyes, grimacing, and puts his head onto his knees, hiding his face in the blanket.

 

Iruka clears his throat and gets back up, his clothes rustling as he leaves the room, and then the house. Kakashi doesn’t know where he goes, but it is clear what it means and he tries to breathe, just breathe, breathe past the pain, just breathe, it will pass. 

 

Breathe.

 

In and out.

 

 

 

 

Breathe.

 

 

 

 

 

When the sun rises he has collected his things, and is ready to leave.

The bed… their bed is stripped and made up. He has aired the house.

 

He looks at Iruka with his Sharingan recording for a long, silent moment when Iruka re-enters the house, and then reaches for his face mask, pulling it up. Iruka’s eyes dim as it settles on Kakashi’s face, hiding him, but he doesn’t comment.

Kakashi’s voice is more steady than he had feared it would be. “Promise me to keep looking after Naruto, if and when you can. I know he thinks of you as a … father figure.”

Iruka swallows. “I will. Kaka-kun, look, I know…”

 

Kakashi doesn’t hear the rest. He pulls down his hitai-ate, takes the bag with his clothes and books, and jumps, the world blurring.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The Sandaime calls for him, finally, a few days after.

 

After Kakashi has spent those days in the dark, his curtains drawn, his door locked. 

The Sharingan had glowed red in the reflection of the water glass, the three tomoe staring back into Kakashi’s soul. 

Replaying, again and again. 

Until he was drained enough to sleep, almost comatose.

 

All the food had tasted like chocolate and so he had stopped eating it.

His nails had left copper half-moon-shapes on his palms. 

 

He drags himself to a cold shower and then to the tower when he is called, unable to feel anything. Sarutobi Hiruzen looks at him, at his slightly rumpled clothes, but doesn’t comment, asks him to go for a walk with him instead.

Kakashi falls into step next to him, his muscles shivering. He is glad the Sandaime chooses so slow a pace, a bit of his old self awakening to feel slightly bad to be in the presence of the Hokage’s guarding Anbu in this state. Even if they may be hidden from his sight, but he can feel their presence, can pinpoint their formation.

Old habits die hard.

 

He inhales, and Sarutobi shoots him a look. “Kakashi, regarding the next group of genin that you’ll be in charge off…”

Oh god. Another team? Kakashi almost scoffs, keeping the derision out of his voice by sheer will alone. “Me? Again?”

The Hokage hums. “I’m sure this new batch of genin will hold your interest.”

Really. Kakashi narrows his eyes, his mouth drawn into a thin line behind the mask. He follows Sarutobi through Konoha’s streets, glumly, and not particularly interested in his surroundings, his thoughts a sluggish cacophony of ‘what now’. 

The Sandaime stops, finally, looking up. 

Kakashi looks down at him, and then up, slowly, his stomach dropping suddenly, and his throat dry. That… cannot be. He cannot breathe, and he tries to keep his voice level and unimpressed, his question for the trailing Anbu only. Needing the confirmation. Needing to know that Naruto does, indeed, still live here. “Where are we.” Is this real? Are you… serious? Hope rears its ugly head. 

 

The Hokage inhales, his voice loud and clear. “This is Uzumaki Naruto’s house.”

A shiver runs down Kakashi’s spine, followed by a rush of almost surreal relief. Oh god, you mean it. He blinks, his heart hammering in his chest. The words are heavy on his tongue, desperately neutral for the Anbu trailing them. “The Yondaime’s… orphan.”

“Mhh hmm.” Sarutobi Hiruzen touches his arm for a moment. “Let’s go up. Naruto is currently at the academy with the others. They have to clean out their things for the new class after summer.”

Kakashi follows him up the stairs silently, feeling suddenly energized in a way he hasn’t been for a while. His stomach growls and the sees a small smirk on Sarutobi’s face. It makes him scowl, but he cannot bring himself to feel the ire. 

The Hokage opens the door rather matter of factly and they enter, Kakashi’s memories of the place merging easily with the way he finds it now.

The apartment is still a mess, and there’s still cups of ramen everywhere, empty and otherwise. The furniture is dusty, and there’s a carton of milk on the table that smells sour.

 Kakashi wrinkles his nose. “The milk is way past its expiration date.” How can it be that you could actually buy this? Or did they… only sell spoilt milk to you? He grimaces at the thought. Unfortunately, he doesn’t feel like this would be a surprise. His mouth twitches in disgust. 

The Sandaime interrupts his thoughts. “He’s a bit of a fool, but it would be best if you would look after him.” 

Kakashi blinks at him, putting the milk down as if in trance. He wants to scream, rant. Fool? How dare you call him that… And… NOW? It’s been FOUR years since our last real interaction. He clenches his jaw, and stays silent. With an effort.

 

The Hokage exhales softly, obviously sensing his emotional state. “You have good instincts.”

Fuck. You. Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long, long moment.

The Sandaime smirks softly, and then turns, indicating all the potted plants around. There is a slight question to his tone. “The boy likes to surround himself with life… I hear he exudes it, too.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. Is there anything you’d like to know, hear from me, Sandaime-sama? Maybe whether I feel invigorated whenever I’m near him? Hmm? Or if he uses the nine-tails chakra? If his healing powers are still as strong? His actual reply is dry, bordering on caustic, twisting the meaning around. “What have I gotten myself into.”

How the FUCK would I know anything you seem interested in. 

He keeps looking at the milk, unable to look the Sandaime in the eye. 

A moment passes, uncomfortable and slow.

 

And then Sarutobi turns, and walks back out the door and down the stairs. 

Kakashi inhales, chancing a look into the little bathroom. His heart thuds heavily when he sees the brush there, on the vanity beneath the mirror. The lacquer is scratched, indicating that Naruto is using it and Kakashi’s lips twist in a small smile, for the first time in days.

 

The Sandaime nods at him when he catches up, his tone easy.  “Next up is a kunoichi.”

They stop next to a rather nondescript house, and suddenly there’s a tumult and then the parents jump at them, screaming. Excited. “Welcome Sandaime! Kakashi Sensei as well!”

Errr. Kakashi tries to fall back a bit. 

The Hokage’s voice is low. “I’m here unofficially.”

Kakashi resists the temptation to roll his eyes. Yes, so unofficially you have Anbu trailing you to witness what we discuss so they will then spread the rumors. He sighs softly. God, I hate politics.

The mother shoves Kakashi into the house and he grimaces at the manhandling. “Please come in, have some tea with us. After all you’re going to be our daughter’s Sensei. So please come in.”

He’s pushed into a chair and there’s cookies, and tea, and fruits and Kakashi’s stomach growls again and he freezes, desperately wanting a hole in the ground to swallow him up. 

The Sandaime laughs softly, reaching for the offered cup of tea. “Well, we can stay a little while.”

Kakashi exhales, and reaches for a tangerine, while the father starts nodding to his wife’s exclamations about… Sakura. Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, remembering the girl in the schoolyard, listening and nodding, and idly wondering who in the family Sakura got her hair color from. 

 

 

Walking afterwards feels surprisingly good again and Kakashi wryly admits that having something to look forward to… helps. He exhales, softly. 

Sarutobi shoots him a look, turning his feet towards an apartment complex near the borders of the closed-off Uchiha-district. “Last one up is Uchiha Sasuke’s house.”

Kakashi looks up, another shiver running down his spine. So similar to his… 

He follows the Hokage up the stairs. 

Sasuke’s room is neat, and there is no food around, just some leftover rice in the fridge.

The Sandaime’s voice is matter of fact. “Sasuke’s father Uchiha Fugaku was very strict.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, remembering the Uchiha leader. Strict is an understatement.“Mhhh.” He looks at the made bed. “Seems the boy is very disciplined. His older brother Itachi was very meticulous as well.” And that is an understatement as well. “I didn’t have to teach Itachi a thing.” But you know that. “His Sharingan was way more effective than mine.” Is that why you let me leave the Anbu, Hokage-sama? Because my Sharingan did not rise to the full potential despite all the pain I’ve endured? That you… made me endure?

 

He pushes the hitai-ate up, looks at the sky through the window for a moment with both eyes. “The shadow of tragedy trails this eye.” And this tragedy is not inherent to the Uchiha clan. 

He sighs. “It might be best not to activate the Sharingan at all.” He pulls the hitai-ate back down, turning to address the Sandaime directly. “If one thinks there is a downside… to having these kind of feelings… that it attracts tragedy… then I must see to it that they treasure their comrades in order to prevent that from happening.” To prevent them trying to incite tragedy to gain its powers.

Sarutobi hums softly, seemingly changing the subject. “This room is quite a contrast from Naruto’s.”

Kakashi exhales. Yes. It breathes death and tragedy. Neatly.

 

He follows the Sandaime to the park, where they sit down on a park bank apart the beaten track. Sarutobi Hiruzen reaches under his robes and pulls out two cans of iced tea, offering one of them to Kakashi with a smirk. 

Kakashi takes it, the hiss as he opens it loud in the air.

The Hokage’s voice is dry. “Well, there’s a hopeless fool, a skilled protegé and a clever kunoichi.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow at him and the Hokage looks at Kakashi from underneath his hat. Slyly. “I would never base my personnel decisions on personal preference!”

Uh huh. Kakashi takes a sip of his tea.

There is a small pregnant pause, and they both look at the birds picking at something on the lawn across the path. 

The Sandaime’s voice is careful, low. “Iruka-san told me about Sasuke’s development.” He shoots a look at Kakashi, tries to gauge his reaction, but Kakashi stares right ahead, refusing to show any of the pain this simple statement elicits. As if you don’t know what this does to me. He keeps watching the birds, waiting. The pain flares and then ebbs to a throb, there in the background.

The Sandaime sighs, almost inaudibly. “I talked to him about Naruto, too.”

Of course. Kakashi refuses to grimace. He cites Iruka, who had told him about it, chuckling and sighing, over dinner. A week ago. It seems like an eternity. “Sasuke graduated the top of his class, Naruto the last.”

This time he allows himself a small snort. “Like Yin and Yang.”

 

The Sandaime hums and then continues, changing the subject just slightly. “Take for example Guy’s team, which was formed last year. They are a similar, seemingly mismatched set up, and it works very well.” He inhales. “I also intend to organize specialty military units that utilize secret ninjutsu.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. I bet he means Ino-Shika-Cho…. That is actually a very good idea.

The Hokage raises his can just slightly. “You are the only one who can advise Sasuke with his Sharingan.”

Kakashi lowers his drink, looks at the Hokage. As if I didn’t know that. He hides his sigh. “I understand that these two are special. But what about the girl, Sakura?”

The Sandaime smiles. “A clever and skilled girl. And one that will serve as a buffer.”

Kakashi frowns, grimacing slightly, and unwilling to hide it. Using her… “That did not work out so well in my own team, as you may remember, Sandaime.”

The Hokage sighs softly. “Without a doubt Obito was desperate for Rin to acknowledge him. It was unfortunate for them. But this is the strict world of Shinobi. But I had faith that it would work out.”

With Minato as your Sensei he doesn’t add.

Kakashi averts his gaze, swallowing. Feelings… not allowed between team-members. But they do happen nonetheless. And more often than not they serve to bind the ties even more tightly. And then… those ties get brutally severed by death. He takes another sip of his tea.

The Hokage’s voice interrupts his thoughts. “I trusted you.” I still trust you, hangs in the air.

Kakashi looks up sharply, frowning, unsure what he’s getting at.

Sarutobi smiles, with a twinkle in his eyes. “Minato knew about your strategy, Kakashi. He had faith in you, that you would come to trust your team-mates and find the sense in teamwork and friendship.”

Kakashi closes his eyes and turns his head away, unable to process all the feelings coming back with the memory of them, together, then, his mind stuck on the thought. Minato Sensei knew all along about my selfish and shallow strategy?

His cheeks feel hot, burning. 

His left eye burns too, unseeing.

 

The Hokage gets up. “To believe in one’s student and to watch over them is also part of being a teacher.”

Kakashi shivers, staring down at his can.

The thought that Orochimaru was the Sandaime‘s pupil is a rather uncomfortable and bitter one, fraught with… implications. He hastily shoves the thought away.

 

The Sandaime puts the empty can back into the hidden pockets in his robes, clasps his hands back together in his back. He looks down at Kakashi, for a long moment. When he finally speaks his voice is soft. “I believe in you, Hatake Kakashi. Be what you were destined to be.”

 

Kakashi gasps a laugh, looking away, his hand cramping around the can.

And what, pray tell, might that be?

 

When he looks back up again, the Sandaime is gone.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Later that night he wakes, with the sense of deja-vu and fey… fatalism. 

 

He’s used to seeing shadows of the past, shadows of his loved ones. 

Shadows of his failures.

Blood on his hands.

 

His father turns to him, quirking an eyebrow.

Kakashi sits up in his bed, reaching, but there’s only frigid air, and emptiness, nothing to touch.

 

The sob is stuck in his throat. “Father… I spent my life denying you. But… I can’t repeat this tragedy with a new generation.”

 

He’s actually not too sure which tragedy he’s referring to. There’s too many to count. 

 

This is my chance though. 

And… I know it. 

 

Hatake Sakumo smiles softly, and Kakashi… exhales.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

Yes, we just skipped 4 years. The next months/years won’t go so fast though^^

Chapter 9: A sliver of hope

Notes:

We know through Boruto that there are more Icha Icha books, but afaik the known names are only ‘Tactics’, ‘Paradise’ and ‘Violence’. 

Also: slight spoilers/references to "The Lost Tower“. Personally, I really like how the movies have impact on the anime/manga canon (and what you can do with it, given Minato’s skills), so. :)) *shrugs*

 

And the chapters are getting longer now. There’s just so much going on!!! *sheesh* 😋

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

If one would be able to look into his very body, they could see the nerves flutter.

 

Kakashi isn’t exactly the nervous type. 

Or the overly emotionally driven type, able to partition everything away nicely if needed.

Under normal circumstances.

 

This morning, circumstances are far from normal though.

Though Rin’s grave is silent, as usual. 

And Obito doesn’t answer, either. As is usual, too. 

Unfortunately.

Though he does feel very close to him today, for some reason.

 

The sun glints softly off the polished surface of the memorial stone.

Same old, same old.

Kakashi groans softly to himself. 

 

There is a displacement of air, and Kakashi knows Tenzou is behind him, his quiet and, for an Anbu, very kind aura preceding him.

And of course he knows the aftershave. 

 

He sighs softly. “Have you been waiting for me, Tenzou?”

He turns around to Tenzou taking off his Anbu mask. With a small smirk. “Stop calling me Tenzou, Senpai.” 

It’s an old joke by now, and Kakashi’s lips twitch. His stomach relaxes somewhat. He swallows, and tries to inflect his voice with humor, but it does come out a bit bitterly regardless. “Did you come all this way to laugh at me, the genin babysitter?” I bet the other Anbu do.

Why does it bother me though? I wanted out, after all? And now that I am…

Tenzou shakes his head softly. “I came to wish you good luck.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “You think I need luck?”

“Errr….. No?” 

Kakashi shoots him a look. 

Tenzou sighs. “This is a very special team.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “Is that so.”

Tenzou looks at him with an expression that would come with the rolling of eyes if Tenzou weren’t so polite. “The last Uchiha and the village’s jinchuriki, that the Sandaime often visited when he was small.”

Often, huh. Kakashi frowns, somehow tickled wrongly by Haruno Sakura’s omission, too. I never really got to know you Rin. I won’t make that kind of mistake again. “And a very clever girl, yes.” 

Tenzou tilts his head slightly in affirmation. “It’s a hell of a team.” 

“Mhh.” Kakashi doesn’t want to comment. Is that why I am this unsettled? The fear that this… hell of a team won’t pass my test?

Or is it because of him.

He swallows and steps past Tenzou. “Was there anything else, Tenzou?”

Tenzou looks at him from the corner of his eyes. “It’s way past the time you were supposed to meet your genins.”

Kakashi balls his fists in his pockets. He inhales, keeps his tone light. “I guess I need to go then.” He starts towards the academy, slowly. 

Tenzou looks after him and Kakashi can hear the smirk. “Good luck, Senpai.”

 

Kakashi figures Tenzou really has a lot of luck he likes him.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He lets the prank unfold, his dark eye on the three culprits instead.

Tries to evaluate the current status of their … teamwork. Which is non-existent. There’s not even a shred of teamwork.

And he tries to ignore how his tattoo… tingles.

 

It’s a harmless prank, and one that will not have Naruto spending his afternoon scrubbing the Hokage heads for once. 

One of these days Kakashi will have to ask him how often he did, in fact, have to do that.

From what I heard they did catch you a few times after all. 

Now, though… now he tries to stay cool and aloof as his heart thunders at the sight of the big, impish grin directed at him. Naruto’s hair stands up to all sides, meaning he probably hasn’t combed it in days. The orange outfit is finally almost a fit, and it’s even almost clean as Kakashi wryly notes. The slingshot is still attached to the Uzumaki swirl arm patch, and Kakashi swallows, heavily.

Kakashi watches Naruto point a finger and laugh, and he cannot breathe, the impulse, the desire to go and hug the little rascal after four years of almost no interaction killing him. 

However… Naruto’s eyes are glowing, but there’s no recognition in them, no personal connection.

Kakashi blinks, remembering Jiraiya’s words, that people see what they want to see. 

 

It hurts, far more than he cares to admit.

 

He swallows the feeling down, the bitterness it elicits, and turns his attention to the other two, with an effort.

Sasuke is pretending to be uninterested - as expected - and the girl is torn between glee at the prank succeeding and a bad conscience, because of it. Mhh, there’s real fire in her. That’s good. It just needs to be focused.

He steps into the classroom.

 

Watches their eyes swivel to him and widen, in anxious fear, devastating need to be recognized, and pretended boredom.

He bends to pick up the blackboard eraser, watches Naruto’s eyes glower in anticipation of a punishment. Defiantly. Something in him relaxes a bit, conversely.

He inhales. “I am Hatake Kakashi, and I am the leader of your team.” There, I said it. He exhales, slowly. He puts the eraser away, and rubs his chin, pretending to be more or less bored. “As for my first impression of you.” He smirks to himself. “Well, I hate you guys.”

Let them stew on that for a while. 

 

He watches their faces fall, figuring the little jab is enough of a punishment for the prank. He indicates the door with a tilt of his head. “It’s too nice a day to be stuck in a classroom. Let’s go up to the roof for the introduction round.” 

He gives them an eye-smile, and then vanishes, hearing their dismayed exclamations from afar. Well Sakura’s and Naruto’s. He watches as the three run up the stairs, breathless, falling over each other in their hurry. 

The bells jingle softly in the little box, where his fingers grip it tightly. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He reads Icha Icha Paradise, while blocking Naruto, who is coming at him directly. I knew it.

The jutsu of a thousand deaths works beautifully, Naruto’s cry rather loud. And he does have to admit, that Naruto’s plan with the Kage Bunshin almost worked, which is quite the feat in itself. You should’ve gone for the bells, not try to hold me.

Sasuke is more sneaky and way more clever, but ultimately only vaguely more successful, and Sakura tries to gauge the situation first, but is easy to manipulate with genjutsu. 

So far, so good. Or bad. 

 

The day doesn’t hold many more surprises, fighting-wise. But he almost laughs when he finds Naruto trying to eat his lunch later. Alone. Snickering to himself behind a stone. You little… imp. 

Scaring him a bit in retaliation is… fun. 

 

He’s glad the mask is hiding his soft grin when he ties Naruto to the wooden pillar, leaves the other two with supposedly firm and clear instructions. You still smell of sunshine, Naruto. How do you do that?

 

The growling of Naruto’s stomach can be heard even to where he is hiding. 

Kakashi inhales. Last phase. Last test. 

 

He is nervous. Dammit. 

Now it will show what you are made of.

 

He inhales again, trying to relax. Minato Sensei had faith in me. So should I have faith in them, too?

He looks up into the clouds. I’m trying to stick to my rules… If only I had accepted the friendship you extended back then, Obito. But I was really a… Bakakashi. 

 

I‘ve changed though. 

You‘ve changed me. 

 

He exhales.

 

It takes a while. And more growling of Naruto’s stomach. But… 

To his surprise Sasuke offers food to Naruto first, then Sakura does too. The relief that swamps him is so potent, he feels weak. 

He smiles behind his mask, aware that his relief to a part is also based in the fact that he does not have to give this team up, too, and him, in addition to this team not failing the minimum criteria he set. 

 

Obito, did you see that? Oh god, I…

He blinks, and there’s a breeze of chilly, fresh air around him suddenly, and warmth in his back, and then there’s six hands that push him forward, two big, four small. His Sharingan burns, and his throat is dry, but he stumbles forward with the push, and there’s pealing laughter in the air and his heart hurts with a rush of love and there’s… hope. 

 

Helpless hope. 

Please… give me this.

 

He’s not sure who he actually prays to.

 

And he cannot resist, he scares them all on purpose, his stumble pushed into a jump to appear right in front of them. “YOU!”

The looks on their faces is priceless, and he grins to himself. “This ends the exercise. You all… “, he hesitates on purpose, making them squirm, his heart beating in his throat. ”…pass!”

 

Their disbelief changes into a mind numbing yell and Kakashi pulls himself up, holds up his hand. “Team seven will start its mission tomorrow.”

 

Team seven.

A shiver runs down his back, settles at his very core.

 

He takes Sakura and Sasuke back to the village, gently prodding them to follow along, leaving the indignantly screaming and yelling Naruto behind, still tied to the wooden pillar. He assures them he’ll go back later, but shakes his head a bit nonetheless, the teamwork lesson one they’ll still have to learn properly. It’s a good thing you all passed already…  He snorts to himself, turning his steps back with a sigh.

 

He half expects Naruto to be yelling still, but he’s snoring instead, mouth open and tilted back slightly, posture slumped into the ropes.

 

Kakashi blinks and looks at him a bit flabbergasted, hands on his hips, trying to make sense of his own feelings. There’s irritation, and annoyance, and amusement, and definitely a bit mischievousness, but he also feels pure affection for this boy, a sense of kinship and connection. 

A pull, but it’s a sedate one. 

He swallows, and his tattoo tingles again and he realizes belatedly that it had not, in fact, done so for the whole time while they had been having their… test.

Which is good, I guess. Imagine if it did…

There’s a voice in his brain, whispering. ‘Imagine if the seal on him would tingle, all the time. Making his stomach tingle, whenever he sees you.’

He swallows, banishing the thought. 

With an effort.

 

Naruto hasn’t let on that he sees anything in him other than an annoying new teacher, and Kakashi grimly vows to leave it at that, the whole… other thing… too weird anyways.

I’m sorry, Sensei. I’ll guard his life and his soul, whenever and however I can. The rest…

He shakes his head, reaching for the ropes.

The rest has cost me my relationship with Iruka already.

His mouth twists in a small, very bitter smile.

 

The blue eyes open the moment he touches Naruto’s wrist, blinking up at him, huge and still sleepy. And so much like… Kakashi shivers, pushing the thought away, giving Naruto a trembling eye-smile. “Naruto. Slept enough?”

Naruto pulls a face, grumbling, and rubbing his wrist when the ropes finally drop.

His mouth pulls into a pout, and it’s still the same pout and Kakashi cannot help himself, he reaches out, ruffles the hair, his heart beating hard, once. He keeps his tone soft. “Why… don’t I invite you for ramen as recompense.” He smirks, pretending. “If you like them, that is?”

 

The blue eyes light up, illuminating the world with a loud yell and Kakashi’s heart thuds again, heavily, helplessly. He grins.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He watches as Naruto slurps down ramen, greedily inhaling the noodles. Kakashi wordlessly pushes over his own, still untouched bowl, nodding at the inquiring look. “You seem way more hungry than me.”

Naruto’s eyes sparkle, and he returns to his bowl, emptying out the broth before turning to the one Kakashi pushed over. “Thank you, Sensei. I don’t usually get fresh ramen. It’s too expensive.”

“Mhhh.” Kakashi really does not dare to comment on that, the ire he feels instantaneous and flaring. He lets it roll through him, and then fade again. “Since we will be going on missions now, you will all get paid regularly. If you are a bit careful, that should not be a problem for long.”

And eating here would beat eating cup ramen every day. He shoots a look at Naruto. “But you should also start to cook for yourself. Do you eat enough vegetables?”

Naruto pulls a face. “Yack.”

 

Kakashi shakes his head, somewhat bemused. “Can you cook?”

Naruto shrugs. “I have a water cooker. And I…” He hesitates, looking down at his second bowl for a moment, seemingly forlorn.

Kakashi prods gently. “And you…?”

Naruto looks up for a moment, and then back down, something in him closing off. “And I can fry fish.”

Ah. Kakashi looks away for a long moment. “Do you… catch them yourselves?” Do you miss me. He has to bite his tongue not to ask, the impulse sudden and almost overwhelming, coming with an overpowering taste of chocolate. He wonders if he actually could have asked, his palms sweaty as the seal fights the impulse.

Naruto sighs next to him, ignorant of his little… problem. “I used to. There was…” He trails off, and then grins up at Kakashi again, his wide smile fake. “I just prefer ramen now.”

Kakashi nods, once, and he knows that for a moment, they both hurt. Deeply.

 

Naruto slurps up the rest of the noodles in the second bowl, too, his expression blissful. “Ahhh, this is so good.”

Kakashi chuckles softly, careful to keep his voice light. “Ichiraku’s makes good ramen.”

Naruto grins up at him. “He was the first one to give me a bowl, ever. When I was still very small.”

Kakashi blinks. “He was?” He looks up at the man behind the counter, who continues working, but grins softly at the boy. Kakashi’s voice echoes his sincerity. “That is so very nice to hear.”

Sandaime. Would it have killed you to take him out once in a while?

He pulls a face behind his mask, the grudge he holds a rather cultivated one by now.  He sighs, trying to let it go for now, looking at the boy next to him. “You’re almost 12 now, aren’t you?”

And I’m about to turn 26… Time flies, indeed. 

Naruto nods, and then slurps down the broth, smacking his lips. “Ahhh, thank you, Sensei Kakashi. That was so good.”

Kakashi chuckles softly, his tone a bit wistful. “There’s a whole new life coming up, Naruto.”

Naruto looks up at him, and his eyes are burning. “I cannot wait, Sensei.”

Kakashi reaches up to ruffle Naruto’s hair again, unable to help himself. “Me neither.”

Naruto grins up at him, and this time, it is a true smile.

 

And Kakashi cannot help but echo it.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

The Sandaime calls on him, later that afternoon. 

Kakashi walks to the tower, slowly, with measured steps, trying to let all emotions go, all the chaotic energy he feels.

He had dropped Naruto off after their early dinner, had listened to the boy babbling excitedly about something - his plants if Kakashi recalls correctly - and had then pouted rather pointedly when Kakashi had suggested he brush his hair.

But had gone and done so, and the scale in the brush ornament had glittered in the sunlight filtering in through dirty windows. 

 

He actually exhales deeply when he feels the other presence, the Sannin always a buffer, a quiet support, whenever he is there. 

Kakashi always had the feeling that Jiraiya actually made a point of being there when Kakashi was called and he happened to be around, though they never sat down again as they did after their first meeting. But it had been enough that sometimes Jiraiya had been there, had known, and had smiled, with the tiniest nod of his head.

Jiraiya always seemed to have his own problems with the way the Sandaime led, too, and Kakashi had often taken his cue from him, if there was a discussion to witness. The handful of times he‘d been there. Still. It had been a relief to know it wasn’t just him. 

 

Now, as he walks in, Jiraiya‘s sly eyes sparkle at him, cheeks rosy once more by sake and laughter. Though Kakashi knows by now that Jiraiya is quite adept at hiding in plain sight, and using people’s perceptions against them. 

And playing the slightly drunk, pervy old sage wandering around and trying to peep into women’s bathhouses apparently does a very good job, cover-wise.

Not that Kakashi doubts that Jiraiya is enjoying the hell out of it, too.

And it is such a weird thing to call him old, isn’t it. He’s what… 50? 51? If he were a civilian that wouldn’t be old yet. But for a ninja… 

 

Jiraiya grins at him, obviously sensing his thoughts. “Kakashi. Come here to greet your old enabler?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, shooting a small look at the Sandaime, but the Hokage only shakes his head, indicating the mat close to them. Kakashi settles down on his knees, bowing down slightly before returning his attention to Jiraiya. “Jiraiya-sama. So nice to see you once more.” He tilts his head. “Enabler?”

Jiraiya’s grin widens. His voice is rather loud, obviously meant to be heard. By whom? “I’ve come to gift my Sensei my new book! ‘Icha Icha Dreams’.” He leans over to Kakashi a bit. “And of course, I cannot not give you one, too, can I.”

Kakashi clears his throat, the tips of his ears red. “Congratulations to finishing it.”

Jiraiya laughs a booming laugh, reaching into his bag with a rather sharp look from the corner of his eyes. “Took me long enough. Gathering… inspiration has been a bit of a wild ride, and of course there was no rush… was there.”

His eyes look directly into Kakashi’s at the last part, and Kakashi feels flayed open, knowing he’s referring to his relationship with Iruka. Knows it’s broken off, now, too. 

Great. My private life is being discussed by the Hokage and his undercover spy pupil. Just… great.

He tries not to feel to bitter about that, logically knowing that they are all bound into… this, of course. Still.

He accepts the book, inclining his head in silent thanks, wincing when the Sannin clasps his shoulder a bit too hard. “You can take me out to dinner as recompense, what do you think?”

Kakashi nods, glad he doesn’t have to answer the upcoming personal questions here.

And there sure as hell are questions incoming.  

He grimaces. 

 

The Sandaime interjects, softly. “I hear we have a new team 7.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. Word travels fast. “They managed to pass the test. Barely.”

The Hokage hums, a small smile on his lips. “That is good. Iruka-san will be relieved.”

Kakashi cannot breathe for a split second, waits till the instinctive pain flares and then ebbs again, quite proud to keep his voice level. “Iruka-san?”

The Hokage tilts his head. “He was here, worried about… that… they would not pass.”

“Mhhh.” Kakashi does not dare to comment that further, in any way, noting the pauses well enough. 

Jiraiya interjects, his tone gleeful. “We’ll meet him for dinner.”

Kakashi’s head swivels around, his voice loud. “What?!”

The Sandaime stands up slowly. “That’s settled then.” Kakashi’s gaze swivels back, a bit flabbergasted. 

Sarutobi Hiruzen looks down at him for a moment. “I expect you and Jiraiya to discuss team 7’s progress from time to time. It will be wise to include someone who has also experience teaching genin.” He turns away just slightly, but hesitates, tilting his head back to Kakashi. “Report for your first mission as a team first thing in the morning.”

And he leaves, his white clothes rustling softly.

 

Kakashi stares into space, his neck prickling where Jiraiya’s gaze flays him open still. His throat is dry, tone acerbic. “Was this your idea, Jiraiya-sama?”

Jiraiya chuckles. “Dinner? Yes. Iruka-san? No.”

Kakashi blinks, relaxing the tiniest fraction. “I see.”

Jiraiya hums, reaching for his cup and emptying it. “Let’s take a walk, Kakashi.”

 

Let’s go out of this place and talk, he means, and Kakashi falls into step with him, turning his feet to walk along the outer village limits when they leave the tower. 

Jiraiya walks with his head high, jovially greeting whenever he sees people he remembers, making a show of enjoying the evening. 

The show lasts until they have reached the outskirts, and Jiraiya quiets a bit, walks silently for a moment. 

Kakashi grimly waits for the questions to drop, which doesn’t take that long. He’s surprised Jiraiya is asking so directly though. “You were together with Iruka-san for almost … 10 years, weren’t you.”

Kakashi exhales, trying to keep his voice level. “8. We… “ wanted to make it official, we wanted to adopt Naruto. He doesn’t say it, somehow knowing Jiraiya knows. 

Jiraiya looks up at the early night sky. “I am sorry. You were a good… match.”

Kakashi looks away, unable to answer, the pause heavy with meaning between them. 

Jiraiya stretches next to him, laughing when his stomach grumbles, but he sighs, settling down again with a sidelong gaze at Kakashi. “In relationships this long you normally become friends, too, to an extent. You will still be a good match, if you manage to salvage this friendship.”

Kakashi shivers, the world blurring, and he bites his tongue until his vision clears again, silently gasping. 

Jiraiya clasps his shoulder once more, gently this time. “Life is still long, Kakashi. And love comes in many forms. It’s not static either. Embrace it, despite fate.”

Kakashi sniffs, and balls his fists in his pockets.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Jiraiya rubs his hands, grinning at them both. “Dig in!”

Kakashi stares down at the table laden with platters, trying not to look at Iruka across his seat, who just looks miserable. There’s bags and dark rings under his eyes, and he’s trying hard to not look at Kakashi, too.

Kakashi’s stomach rumbles, reminding him that he did push his own presumed dinner over at Naruto earlier, and Jiraiya sighs, putting a platter of seasoned vegetables right in front of him. “Don’t make me repeat myself.”

 

Kakashi blinks, reaching for the chopsticks. 

Iruka reaches for a bowl of Miso soup.

Jiraiya chews on a piece of seasoned and smoked fish. 

 

There is a … pause. 

An uncomfortable, pregnant pause. 

 

Kakashi eats vegetables and noodles, with bursts of chakra enhanced speed, absolutely unwilling to fully pull down his mask. 

 

Jiraiya sighs, reaching for the bottle of sake and pouring them all some. His voice is low, impossible to be heard beyond their back table in the noisy restaurant. "Minato knew what he was doing.“

Kakashi freezes, a piece of brokkoli in his sticks, his dark eyes unseeing on the table. Iruka sniffs, reaching for his sake and throwing the shot back. 

Jiraiya looks at them both, reaching for his own. "I‘ve mulled over the question as to why Minato took the chance for a while. And then I remembered the impression I got when I touched your tattoo back then.“

Kakashi blinks, remembering the moment in the shady litte restaurant, so long ago. "What impression?“

Jiraiya narrows his eyes, evading a bit. "When did you get your Anbu tattoo, Kakashi?“

Errrr. He frowns, his voice carrying his irritation. "When I joined the Anbu.“

Jiraiya tilts his head. "Did you go onto missions with Minato while he was in the Anbu? Before you yourself were really part of it?“

Kakashi licks along his teeth, unease settling in his gut. He puts his chopsticks down. "Some, yes.“

Jiraiya nods slowly. His voice is very soft. "Who did your tattoo, Kakashi.“

Kakashi opens his mouth, but he cannot think, the answer stuck halfway in his throat. Minato did. He blinks, his palms sweaty. 

Iruka scoffs, guessing correctly. "Well, that’s not a surprise then.“

Kakashi cannot breathe, his mind stuck still. I never realized. But… He presses the words out. "But why would he want to influence my tattoo at that point? I was 13 when I joined the Anbu, Kushina wouldn’t become pregnant for over a year yet?“ He points a finger. "You know that?!“

Jiraiya raises his eyebrows, nodding, and humming. He indicates Kakashi with his sake. "Why do you feel so drawn to that wood user?“

Kakashi blinks again, unable to follow. "What?“

Jiraiya frowns slightly, looking to Iruka for confirmation. "That wood user in the Anbu. You are his friend. Tenzou is his name I believe.“ He tilts his head. "The Sandaime told me you were adamant to save him and then to be on a team with him.“

 

There is a small pause as Kakashi mulls on that statement, silently reaching for his own glass of sake after a moment. He shrugs, drinking it down. 

The alcohol draws a burning, grounding path through his guts. 

Jiraiya leans back a bit, watching him silently. 

When he speaks again, it is with a finality that chills Kakashi. "Back then, when I touched your tattoo, I got the impression of a temporal component in it. Under it. Invisible. First I thought it was because of the time-delayed effect of the match… but it was too strong for that.“ He chuckles slightly. "I know Minato has erased some kind of time travel memory from your brain. I felt it when we first met and I have read it in his journal.“

Kakashi interjects, his tone incredulous. "Sensei Minato wrote about time-travel in his journal?“

And they… gave them to you?

Jiraiya shakes his head. "No, just some“, he makes quote signs in the air with his fingers, "thoughts. On that and wood style users.“ He scoffs and then sighs, continuing softly. "I have some experience with seals, but Minato being the heir to the Namikaze clan and married to an Uzumaki has had a different level of understanding of them. And I know that he and Kushina often discussed the sealing jutsus and the healing powers of the Uzumaki clan.“

Kakashi’s voice is toneless. "You think Minato made the seal on Naruto’s stomach explicitly permeable for the fox‘s healing powers.“ Jiraiya inclines his head, confirming silently. Iruka leans a bit closer, listening intently. 

Kakashi clears his throat. "And you think he infused my tattoo with a temporal component… why.“

Jiraiya whispers. "Why do you think.“

Kakashi exhales a shuddering breath. His mind races, putting the pieces together. I went onto missions with Minato. He himself put the tattoo on me when he called me into the Anbu after one such mission. The tattoo was imbued with a temporal component… a lock, even then. It started to… unlock? the night he put the seal on Naruto. I will probably know or… remember when it is fully unlocked.

Kakashi gasps, feeling sick. "Sonofabitch.“

Iruka blinks at him, eyes wide. "What.“

 

Jiraiya sighs. "He just realized Minato set it all up because of some kind of temporal insurrection Kakashi does not have a memory of anymore.“

Iruka swallows, his tone incredulous. "What??“

Jiraiya smiles softly, a tinge of bitter sadness in his voice. "Minato was always very level-headed that way. Focused. Practical to a fault. It’s totally his way of thinking.“

Kakashi’s voice is raw, unfortunately concurring with that assessment. "So… Naruto and I are bound by a locked memory on my side, not a soul-bond match after all?“ He doesn’t dare to look at Iruka, not sure how to feel about it, his heart besting in his throat. His heart whispers ‘liar’.

Jiraiya hums. "Yes, and no. The … tattoo itself and the seal are locked temporally, in tandem, yes. They will release at some point in the future.“

Kakashi croaks harshly. "But?“

He expects Jiraiya to answer, but it is Iruka who does, sounding defeated. "But the ink, Kaka-kun… the chakra locked nonetheless. The bond engaged. The … Yondaime probably used the ink on a hunch, maybe by what he saw in that locked memory.“

He looks at Kakashi, and Kakashi is unable not to look up, their eyes meeting in fathomless, shared pain. Iruka’s voice is a whisper. "Minato may have had his reasons, may have prodded fate, but…“

He trails off and Jiraiya finishes, very softly. "But Naruto is your soul-mate, and was confirmed as such.“

 

The world blurs, and a tear falls from Kakashi’s right eye, the hitai-ate over his left growing wet. He feels Iruka’s hand on his left, squeezing softly. He wants to withdraw his hand, but he cannot, frozen on the spot. 

The words come, unbidden. “But I love you,  Iruka.”

Iruka’s eyes close. 

Jiraiya sniffs, reaching for the bottle and refilling their glasses. He clears his throat. “We know.”

Kakashi blinks at him, his throat raw. “Doesn’t that change everything?” He snorts darkly. “It always does in your books and in the movies.”

Iruka withdraws his hand, pressing his fingers to the bridge of his nose. He sniffs, shaking his head once. “Reality sucks.”

Jiraiya cackles, in a decidedly vicious way. “Ain’t that the truth.”

 

They are silent for a long, long moment.

Finally Jiraiya speaks again, sounding defeated. “Don’t be angry at Minato, Kakashi.”

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head once, admitting to himself that he is, indeed, seething. “Yeah, why.”

Again, it is Iruka who answers, his voice almost inaudible. “He only wanted the best for his child, pressed to do something, with the information he did have, in an impossible situation.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he sneers at him, almost yelling. “Why do you take his side? This is what is destroying us.”

Iruka raises his eyebrows, nodding and looking down. “I know.” And then he smiles, a brittle, bitter little smile that deflates Kakashi’s anger, immediately. “But, Kaka-kun, I want you in my life still. And if I cannot have you as a… partner…” He raises his eyes to Kakashi, bravely, and Kakashi cannot help but keep the gaze, unable to look away. 

Iruka smiles again, beautifully now. “I still want you as my friend.”

Kakashi’s hand twitches, empty, on the table, the only outward sign of the trail of devastation Iruka’s words leave in him.

Iruka reaches for it, gently, clasps it in his own. “Be my friend, Kaka-kun.”

Jiraiya inhales, and then puts his left hand over Iruka’s, reaching for Kakashi’s other with his right. “And I’ll be here for you. For you both. However and whenever I can.”

Kakashi tilts his head slightly, looks at him through his blurred vision. His voice carries all the pain he feels, and a resolution that is chilling. “Fine. If you’re not, I’ll hunt you down and kill you. Slowly.”

Jiraiya smiles at him, all teeth and fangs and challenge. “That’s only fair.”

Kakashi raises his chin, his voice becoming even colder. “You will train Naruto at some point.”

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow, with a smirk. “I had intended to do that anyways.”

Iruka sniffs and then chuckles, his hands squeezing Kakashi’s. "Thank you, Kaka-kun.“

Kakashi swallows, his throat clicking as he speaks. "Yeah, well, be careful what you wish for.“

Jiraiya laughs, deeply, his eyes sparkling. "Now that’s the spirit.“

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi trails after his little genins, his… cute little genins, feeling mellow.

He has a headache, Jiraiya had simply refilled his glass time and again and Kakashi… had been unwilling to go home to his empty, cold bed. 

Especially since Iruka had been there, with them.

 

For a while at least.

Fool.

 

He’s really nursing the headache now, using it to wallow a bit… in something he does not quite dare to name self-pity. But knows it is anyways. 

Knowing and realizing doesn’t really help with putting an end to it though.

 

His little genins are vibrating with energy, and are showing off among themselves, or at least Naruto is, trying to impress Sakura, who is only interested in pretending-to-be-bored Sasuke. 

So far, so predictable.

 

The first mission is simple - find the daimyo’s cat, Tora, and return it.

 

Kakashi has heard that it’s one of those missions that just keep rolling the cash in, since the little bugger keeps running away. Kakashi cannot quite blame it, he’s seen how the daimyo’s wife handles the cat. 

Still. It’s a good, first, solid D-rank mission, especially when your Sensei has a hangover.

Kakashi is really glad he wears his mask.

He’s put some peppermint leaves into it, too, to stop the urge to throw up. 

 

Sasuke’s a good tracker, and he and Naruto keep giving each other dark gazes. 

Kakashi wonders idly what happened in those years in school that made them so… He grins to himself, remembering Guy back then. It may be just that. 

If it is, this should be good for them.

 

Right?

 

 

There is a sudden high pitched screech and Kakashi is torn from his lazy thoughts, Naruto jumping into the bushes with a small cry.

He comes out, triumphantly, holding the cat… which turns and starts to scratch him, all over.

Kakashi blinks, expecting Naruto to drop the cat immediately, but he keeps holding onto it, eyes scrunched shut, complaining loudly… but he holds it.

You little… 

Kakashi smiles behind his mask. 

 

After a while, the cat quiets in defeat.

Sakura is yelling at Naruto for letting himself get scratched like that, and Kakashi has half the mind to interject and tell her to knock it off, but… Naruto grins at her, sheepishly, but with a blush, inhaling the attention, even if it may be yelling. 

It is directed at him, and it is rooted in concern.

For the mission, for a teammate. Probably not what he wishes for it to mean. Still. 

It is attention.

Kakashi shifts to his other foot, resolves to only watch the dynamic for now.

Naruto grins proudly at Sakura, totally ignoring the scolding. Sasuke carries a small smile, when he thinks that nobody is watching.

 

Potential, yes.

 

He feels vaguely guilty when he sees Tora get squeezed upon mission completion. Kakashi knows the cat will be gone again, by next week. Maybe tomorrow. 

It really pays well though.

And they are very practiced at treating scratches at the hospital.

 

He puts his finger into Naruto’s collar when he sends the others home, refusing to truly feel the unruly hair, or the soft skin, just beneath his fingertips. “Just a second.”

Naruto’s big blue eyes turn to his. “Sensei?”

Sensei… such a weighted word. Kakashi swallows. “Naruto, you have scratches all over your face. We have to go get them disinfected.”

Naruto frowns, and then gingerly touches his face. “Oh, I bet they’ll just heal, no worries, Sensei.”

Kakashi grunts, trying to stay neutral. “I’m sure. Still, I’d like them to be treated properly.”

He turns and starts walking, and Naruto falls into step after a moment, echoing his pose, hands in his pockets. Kakashi stares straight ahead. “Was there anything between you and Sasuke at the academy? He behaves a little cold towards you?”

Naruto pouts, pulling a face, and Kakashi wants to laugh, but refrains, with an effort. “Yeah, well, he thinks he is so much better at anything, and then of course there was this….”

Naruto trails off, and Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, softly prompting. “This?”

Naruto groans, head thrown back, and then shakes his head, still pouting. “I kind of kissed him.”

Kakashi blinks, feeling floored, by the words themselves and the… nonchalant delivery. You… what? Out loud he tries to keep an uninterested appearance. “You… kissed him and you think that is what is causing this friction between you?”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “Yeah, well, it was an accident, and Sasuke has always been an ass.”

Kakashi chuckles silently, behind his mask. “I see.”

The power of a first kiss.

Such a mythical, powerful thing to happen between you and him. I wonder…

He inhales, shaking his head at himself for a moment, looking up at the hospital entrance. “We’re here.”

He frowns, deciding to address it after all. “The first kiss carries a special kind of power, if you believe in this sort of thing, of course.”

Naruto looks up at him, the scratches already scabbing over. He scratches at one. “It does?”

Kakashi tilts his head. “Yeah, it often means that your destinies are interwoven. Entwined. Fated.”

Naruto blinks at him, and then looks away for a moment, heavily emphasizing the words. “Well, it cannot be something entwined with him then though.”

Kakashi frowns, looking down at him. “It cannot be?”

Naruto shrugs. “Not really, no.”

Kakashi bends down a bit, curious and slightly peeved. “Whyyyy?”

Naruto shrugs again, sheepishly. “Because the first kiss I got was right here, and from someone else. And that someone has left my life.” His finger touches his forehead.

Kakashi freezes. And stares. 

 

Just… stares.

He doesn’t know what to feel.

There’s… too much. And not enough oxygen. And it’s been so long already. 

But he remembers the smell of the skin, and the feel of it, on his lips. 

 

“Sensei?“

The word rips him out of his stupor, forces him to recollect himself. He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “And you think that kiss is more relevant than the one between you and Sasuke?”

His voice is almost firm, his stomach in turmoil.

Naruto shrugs, looking up at him with watchful eyes. “I don’t know. Maybe?“

Kakashi swallows. Maybe indeed. 

 

The scratches are gone now, and he simply turns, his mind churning. 

Naruto trods down the street with him, uncharacteristically silent for once. 

 

It’s almost companionable.

Kakashi follows him up the stairs to his apartment, not even really knowing why.

Maybe he needs to know or he wants to ask further, but he really cannot say.

 

He sees the wrapped package on the doorsill first, immediately recognizing Jiraiya’s rather signature writing.  Naruto picks the package up, reading the letters out loud. “A gift from a friend. For cold nights.”

He frowns looking up at Kakashi, who shrugs. “No idea. You’ll have to open it.”

What the ever loving hell have you done now, Jiraiya?

He cannot help himself, he has a sinking feeling in his stomach.

 

Naruto wrestles with the packaging, the tongue sticking out between teeth, which is a rather endearing sight. And then the paper comes off… revealing a doll.

A plush doll. 

 

A big plush doll.

 

A big Kakashi plush doll.

 

 

 

Kakashi wants to kill Jiraiya. NOW. Slowly.

 

Who needs three legendary Sannins anyways.

 

 

 

Naruto squeals and then does a little thing with this… abomination in his arms, hugging it to himself while turning on the spot right in front of his door, cooing and sighing and petting it, and squeezing it rather like the poor Tora was squeezed earlier, beaming up at Kakashi when he finally stops.

His mouth is moving, but Kakashi cannot hear him, the sounds of the words reaching him as if through water, broken off and overlapping. “Kaka… Sense… at that… gonna take… bed…. Did you… I bet… Sakura will…. Oh and Sasuke… I like… soft… like you….”

Kakashi grunts, tasting bile in his throat. He holds up his hand. “Naruto.”

Naruto’s little mouth snaps shut and he stares up at Kakashi, and his eyes are glowing, there is so much happiness in them, such a sheer, brilliant exuberance, and the words ‘I cannot let you cuddle with a doll of your teacher’ die helplessly in Kakashi’s throat, shooting a withering look at his reputation. “I…” He hesitates, staring down into blue, and then sighs, heavily. In defeat. I’m such a sucker. “Is there a card?”

Naruto shakes his head. He holds the doll up, grinning broadly. “No, but it must have been someone who knew you would become my teacher, right?”

Kakashi grunts non-committingly. Indeed. 

Naruto blinks at him. “Do you think there’ll be more dolls for me at some point?”

There better not be. “I don’t know.”

“Hmmmm.” Kakashi watches as Naruto softly traces the outline of the mask on the doll’s face. The doll is… more a pillow than a real doll, and Kakashi’s one visible eye is slanted and looks decidedly bored. 

Naruto pokes at it. “It really looks just like you!”

Heaven help. Kakashi shakes his head. “So what exactly do you plan to do with it?”

Naruto smirks. “Well, cuddle of course.”

Of course. “Aren’t you too old already for cuddles?” 

 

He wants to take the words back, like, immediately, because the light in Naruto’s eyes dims, dulls, and it is one of the most painful things to witness, and Kakashi knows with absolute clarity that he does not want to be the reason for this to happen, ever again. 

Naruto looks away, and Kakashi sighs, lowering himself into a crouch and then reaches out, clasping Naruto’s locked shoulder. “Forget it. I was being stupid. One is really never too old for cuddles.” Naruto stares at the ground, and Kakashi gives him this mini shake, until Naruto looks back up at him, defiantly. “I mean it.” God knows I would give a lot to be able to cuddle tonight, too. “It’s just weirding me out a bit that you plan to cuddle with me I think.”

The whiskers quiver on Naruto’s face and there’s a small grin stealing itself into his expression. “Yeah, well, it will just be protecting me? Like you?”

Kakashi snorts softly, releasing Naruto’s shoulder slowly. “Well, that is one way to look at it.”

Naruto’s grin broadens again, slowly. 

Kakashi wants to nurse the light in Naruto’s eyes, badly. It’s what makes him stupid. Or so he tells himself later. “You could make more dolls I guess?”

Naruto blinks up at him. “Ohhhh more Kakashi Senseis!!”

Errr. “No, I meant…”

Naruto interjects, beaming again. “Like whittled maybe? Or knitted? Maybe I could bake one, even. I could make a whole family of little Kakashi Senseis!”

Kakashi stares at him for a long, long moment. And then sighs in defeat. “Sure. I guess.”

And his arm is full of Naruto, of sunshine, and the scent of home, and little arms are slung around his neck, the doll pressed between them. “Thank you so much, Sensei!”

Kakashi tries not to breathe so deeply for fear of being unable to let go again, lightly patting Naruto’s back. “Yeah, well, this wasn’t my idea, but…”, he hesitates, and then adds honestly, fatalistically, “But I’m glad you’re happy.”

Naruto squeezes him once more and then withdraws, hugging the doll to himself. 

Kakashi sighs and then pushes himself up, taking the wrapping paper and folding it in the process. “Rest now. We’ll have another mission tomorrow.”

Naruto beams up at him. “I bet there’ll be no nightmares today!”

Kakashi blinks, suddenly feeling like crying. His voice is breaking, and he hopes Naruto doesn’t hear it. “There better not be, I’m protecting you after all.” He reaches out, flips the doll with a finger. “Or, my alter ego is.”

Naruto giggles.

Kakashi tilts his head. “Off you go.”

 

Naruto turns and enters his apartment, with a quick grin back, and Kakashi stands there for a moment, feeling almost forlorn, his hands gliding along the lines of the wrapping paper. 

 

 

And then he jumps over and to the rooftop three houses away, landing silently next to Jiraiya, who is laid back against a wall in the evening sun. 

 

Jiraiya’s voice drips with amusement. “Like it?”

Kakashi grunts, shoving the paper into his pocket. “You’re so lucky to be alive.”

Jiraiya chuckles, his dark eyes glittering with mischievousness. “The boy needs affection, and lots of love, and since we cannot provide it directly… At least not yet….”

Kakashi hisses softly, lowering himself down with a sigh. “He’ll make a doll with my likeness out of everything now.”

Jiraiya giggles, reaching into his pocket for a soggy Onigiri. “Probably. And you love it.” He shoots a sly look at Kakashi, who colors just slightly, accepting the Onigiri Jiraiya pushes his way. “Here. Eat. You’re still looking green around the gills.”

Kakashi pulls down his mask, starts to munch on the small rice ball, knowing Jiraiya will keep his gaze averted. It’s one of those little things… It’s why I actually really like him. He shakes his head once, commenting softly. “That’s a nice eggplant filling. Very tasty.”

Jiraiya hums. “The shop is three streets down, I’ll show you.” He sighs, relaxing even more next to Kakashi. “You should bring some vegetables to the little rascal, too. Maybe cook with him.”

“Mhhh.” Kakashi frowns a bit. “I… “ He pulls a face, trying to put it into words. “I don’t want to interfere too much with him bonding with his team mates. I am his Sensei now, and …”

Jiraiya interjects, with a very dry tone. “And we all know the bond between Sensei and pupil is a very tight one indeed, don’t we.” He leans into Kakashi a bit, without looking. “And one that is often laden with longing. Or more.”

Kakashi feels the tips of his ears burn. His voice is gruff. “If you say so.”

Jiraiya laughs gently. “I know so.” He sobers a bit, wistfulness stealing into his smile. “But suit yourself. It would be good for both of you though.” He hesitates for a moment. “He really looks like a perfect mix between them.”

Kakashi is silent, not daring to comment on that. 

 

Jiraiya continues after a moment, his voice carrying wistfulness. “Minato was too young to be Hokage, too young to die for this village. A lot of ninjas are, but he… I wonder what would have happened if he had been older when he took the hat. A… bit more experienced in politics.”

Kakashi frowns, finishing his Onigiri and pulls his mask back up, feeling the tiniest bit better. “He didn’t have much choice though. The Sandaime wanted to retire, and everyone was trying for a new start with the Uchiha.”

Jiraiya tilts his head, looks at him. “Yeah. What a coincident that they were not used for help with the nine-tails then. Or that you were away.”

Kakashi pulls a face, his voice very low, heart beating in his throat. “This statement alone might bring us in for treason, Jiraiya-sama.”

Jiraiya scoffs. “Oh no worries. My Sensei knows very well how I feel about it all.”

Kakashi looks at him for a moment, and Jiraiya grins, a broad fake smile. “Forget it. We’ll talk about it all when we can, someday. I cannot tell you everything now anyways.”

Kakashi frowns and Jiraiya leans in again, his tone soft. “Not only you know the taste of chocolate on their tongue.”

Kakashi locks their gazes, slowly. Jiraiya stares at him, and the gaze is… intimate somehow. Knowing. Seeing. Kakashi swallows. His voice is breathless. “Someday?”

Jiraiya nods, once. “Someday. I promise.”

Kakashi nods, and then relaxes into the last rays of the sun, slowly, the silence companionable, the warmth next to him promising something.

 

Promising knowledge.

Promising hope.

 

Hope…

 

There’s this sliver of hope now.

Somehow.

 

And it’s golden.

 

 

 

 

Notes:

The fact that the Kakashi doll(s) is/are canon will forever be hilarious to me :))) I just love the little buggers, whenever they show up in manga and anime *g* It’s such a… beautiful little detail that has so much MEANING *grins*

Chapter 10: Mirrors, reflecting our souls

Notes:

The first instance of Mr. Ukki I found/was able to find by asking is the chapter image of manga chapter 16, with Kakashi in his bed and Mr. Ukki behind him.
Chapter 16 is right in the middle of the Land of Waves mission though, so the cover image is just a glimpse outside the story and therefore I HC Mr. Ukki’s first appearance a bit further in:)
That image also shows Kakashi wearing dog tags, which I find interesting.

This chapter is a woven-into-and-around-the-Land-of-Waves-mission one, bc there’s just soooo much going on between the lines. This is a very long chapter, ~ 13k. I… debated splitting it up, but… it didn’t feel right. So many important things, that shaped the manga and anime, and “them“, and I‘m exploring those, in between. And adding more in and around it 😈😋

There’s a quote from someone in here that will be repeated by that source character later on in the fic (much later), props to those of you who know who said it in canon :)

As a side note, I’ve now written (unedited) 120k, with more than 20 more chapters mapped. I’ll put a number to the total chapter count when I can… gauge when I’ll reach where I WANT TO BE DAMMIT :))))

Chapter Text

 

 

Naruto freezes when they are attacked, just outside the village.

Simply freezes, his little face stunned and staring at the ground, unseeing.

 

Kakashi frowns from his hiding place, watches as Sasuke jumps to help Sakura protect the supposed trader Tazuna. Naruto is still frozen to the spot.

Kakashi cannot help himself, he feels disappointed. It’s only their fifth mission, but still…

Interesting. And disappointing, considering your ancestry. 

 

He reappears, easily defeating the two foreign ninjas. Swallowing his emotions down. 

Voicing his disappointment though. 

Sakura is blushing, Naruto is… still frozen. 

Sasuke is looking decidedly pleased.

 

And then Sasuke does something that Kakashi will later come to realize is the point of origin that… changes everything. The turning point, the spark that sets everything off. 

 

Sasuke calls Naruto a… coward. 

 

And Kakashi can feel the sudden jolt of energy. 

 

He tries to stay relaxed, turns to tend to Naruto’s wound instead, tries to exude calm, feeling the seal ooze energy. He clicks his tongue, keeping his tone light. "Maybe we should go back. You have been poisoned.“

Not that I think the fox would allow it to spread I bet.

 

But Naruto surprises him, drawing a kunai and stabbing it into his own hand, viciously. His blue eyes flash as he twists the knife, and Kakashi winces silently in sympathy, as the other two genins stare, in shock. 

There is no shaking in Naruto’s voice, no hesitation, no… pain. “I promise that I will never, ever back down again. Never hesitate, never flee. Never hide behind Sasuke again. Always will fulfill the mission.”

 

Kakashi blinks at him, at the sudden silence, mutely watching the the poisoned blood flow out, drip to the ground. He kneels down next to Naruto, gently takes the small hand, the kunai leaving it with a sickly, wet sound. “Mah, mah, easy, you‘ll bleed to death if you continue to bleed like this… Seriously.” He smirks behind his mask, lowering his voice, as Naruto flails a bit wildly at his words. Easily calming him again. “That is quite the promise to make.” 

Quite a credo to live by. 

Naruto’s eyes snap to his, instantly relaxed, and yet still literally glowing with ire, but also burning with resolve. 

Kakashi lowers his eyes to the wound, starts to silently wrap it. The fox’ healing powers have really come through. Is it only his doing though? Or is the seal itself helping. Something compels him to ask, there, between them, in this space where the others cannot hear. “Is this your ninja way?”

Is this who you decide to be?

Naruto tilts his head, and blinks, some of the energy fading with each layer of bandage Kakashi wraps around his hand. His still little voice is… hard. Firm. “It is.” He pauses, mouth set in a small pout Kakashi easily recognizes once more, and which makes him smile, softly. “Sensei.”

Kakashi lets the smile grow into a smirk, finishes up the bandage. “Good.” He raises his eyes to Naruto’s, something in him twisting at the words. “Make sure it is.”

 

He pushes up, and tries to throw off this feeling of premonition, of his neck tingling.  He clears his throat, relaxes his stance, pushes his hands back into his pocket. “Let’s go.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Watching the sheer exuberant joy on Naruto’s face as they pass the fog and enter the foreign village is almost enough to destroy the annoyance Kakashi still feels at being more or less tricked into an at least B-level-mission with a couple of cute little genins. 

I really have to stop calling them cute and little. They’re ninjas now. And my team. Kakashi swallows harshly. The next enemies won’t be as easy. 

He watches Sakura and Naruto squabble, but silently congratulates Naruto for his instincts, his own nerves itching as well - they are being watched indeed. 

 

Naruto has matured these last few missions, as have the others, but he tends to be unpredictable, and utterly irreverent, which is quite a delight - when it’s not utterly annoying because Naruto just won’t listen at times.

And always does things his way.

Sometimes Kakashi doesn’t know whether he wants to rap his knuckles over his head or hug him. Badly.

 

There is a sharp exclamation from his little maverick ninja, and then Naruto almost squeezes the poor snow rabbit he throws a kunai at to death. It reminds Kakashi a lot of the poor Tora, but it also serves to keep Naruto’s head low, a fact that is immensely helpful when the sword slashes through the air. 

Viciously, without warning.

 

For a moment, Kakashi’s mind is blank with the vision of Naruto’s limbs dripping red. He shoves the image away, hastily, harshly, glad that Sakura is so quick to help. He thrusts his hand behind himself to hold Naruto back when he runs up to him, grimly knowing that Naruto is no match for someone bearing this sword.

Kakashi can feel Naruto’s little heart thunder against his palm, the attack the boy is planning ill advised but definitely closer to his brand new ninja way. 

Keep the spirit.

Kakashi smirks wryly to himself while keeping his eyes on their new adversary, who has appeared crouching on the sword still stuck in the ground. "Keep back.“ He inhales, smells the scent of fresh, cold, water. Water jutsus. "He is a different level than the other two.“ Very different.

The sword, the wraps, the water… the demon of Kirigakure. 

 

Damn.

 

He exhales slowly. I have to be careful. Very careful. ”I guess I have no choice…“ He’s not looking forward to what actually fully using it entails. But at least we’re close to the village. If anything should happen Tazuna can take them to safety. He grimaces. I hope.

The man balancing on the sword handle hums with appreciation. Anticipation, too. ”Kakashi with the sharingan…“

Kakashi can feel Naruto‘s confusion, and Sasuke‘s sudden focus, like a lead weight. Yeah, yeah, surprise, surprise, Sasuke. His tone is hard, ordering them. "Protect Tazuna-sama.“ He pushes his hitai-ate up and the world shifts from black into focus, merges harshly, blindingly powerful. "Zabuza, if you want him - you have to fight with me.“

Zabuza smirks with his face shifting behind the wraps serving as a mask, the voice a weird mix of honesty and mockery. “It will be my honor.”

 

Kakashi sighs. This is definitely an A-rank mission now… with my black mask against his white. 

He narrows his eyes, absentmindedly hearing Sasuke explain the sharingan to Sakura and Naruto. Hears the excitement in Naruto’s voice and the reluctant awe in Sasuke’s. 

And the fear. 

Healthy fear, indeed. 

 

He watches Zabuza vanish into fog and turns, deliberately smiling at them all while his heart begins thundering, as his body steps up the adrenaline. “Don’t worry, I’ll protect you with my life.” There is no taste of chocolate now, no need to remind him. He means it. “I won’t allow my comrades to be killed.” I just hope I can. Please, I have to. This time I have to manage. He frowns, watching the fog drift. “He’s just a man.” I have to protect them. My… cute little genins.

My… team.

 

The attack comes as fast and brutal as expected, but he manages to deflect. 

It is Naruto who warns him to look behind, has the guts to call out, and he switches with a doppelgänger, and for a moment, it looks like he has Zabuza where he wants him, namely at the tip of his kunai.

The moment passes though, passes in a way that sends dread through him, and vicious self-hatred, and then sends him to this watery prison, even, his limbs trying to tread water in the sphere, the water absorbing them easily. 

 

Leaving them unprotected.

Leaving him unprotected.

 

His soul is a vicious, dark, twisting thing, biting at his mind, in an all too familiar way.

He knows what swords like these do.

 

And then Zabuza rushes at his genins, and kicks Naruto through the air. 

Sharply, maliciously.

With glee.

 

No. Please.

 

Fear and terror settle in Kakashi, mixing with the sudden taste of bile, in his throat. He calls to them, no screams at them. Wanting them gone, wanting them safe, wanting him safe, dammit. “Run. Take Tazuna-sama and get out of here. He cannot go after you while keeping me here. Run!!”

He can see Sasuke and Sakura shift, preparing to flee.

 

But Naruto is pushing himself up, slowly, staring down at his wrapped hand. His blond hair is falling into his face and Kakashi frowns, not understanding for a moment. 

Naruto turns his head, and Kakashi’s eyes widen, his mouth shaping around ‘baka’, around the debilitating terror that runs through him, no, don’t, Iruka’s headband isn’t worth your life, and then Naruto charges and then flies through the air again, with a sickly crunching sound, and Zabuza laughs… and Naruto pushes himself up, blood dripping from his mouth - and his hand locked around his headband.

 

Kakashi stares, almost numbly, as Naruto ties it around his head once more, with a grin. 

You little imp. The thought is fond, but his panic for him, for them, is real.

 

He hears himself shout at them, then, but it is remote somehow, the demon of Kirigakure happily reciting his deeds. Making them shiver. And then gleefully knocking Sasuke to the ground, blood spurting from the boy’s mouth.

 

There is a jolt of energy, of anger, and then dozens and dozens of Kage Bunshin flare up, nothing but little, orange Narutos everywhere, and Kakashi stares, his mind still numb. So many of them. Iruka really was right. My limit is at five… After practicing. This must be over a hundred…. But they still won’t be enough to defeat Zabuza.

 

Little puffs of smoke as the Bunshin are indeed defeated, one by one, and then Sasuke’s big shuriken whirls through the air, followed by a second one and Naruto transformed himself into it? and the kunai whirrs, destroying the doppelgänger keeping Kakashi imprisoned, and Zabuza screams and charges at Naruto, and the big sword glints and swoops down, and… metal screeches, as Kakashi jumps and holds the blow, with his gloved and armored right hand only.

 

And his fucking will.

 

For a moment, nothing happens.

Water drops from his hair.

 

The shock of the block travels through him, in ripples, but it is inconsequential, an afterthought, and he locks gazes with Zabuza, slowly, watches as the big ninja… gulps. 

He doesn’t even feel the heavy drain of the sharingan, he is suddenly so calm and… pissed. 

His tattoo pulses. Burns.

 

Demands.

 

It must transmit, somehow, because Zabuza jumps back, hastily weaving signs, which Kakashi copies, grimly, rapidly, but almost lazily. Smirking behind his mask, letting his sharingan flare up to full power, ignoring the drain. Their jutsus clash, cancelling each other out, and it all feels remote somehow, the only real thing the fire on his upper arm, and the single minded determination to bring this foe down, this threat.

 I’ve got you now. He jumps after Zabuza, onto the tree. The kunai feels cold in his hand. “It’s over.” Zabuza’s eyes widen, as he tries to escape, Kakashi narrows his own. “You’re dead.”

And he really means that.

 

Wants to feel the red hot copper spray.

I’ll make you pay for going after him.

 

But… there’s a hissing sound and Zabuza drops to the ground, thin metal pins sticking from his throat. 

 

Kakashi stares after him, a shiver running down his back. 

He feels… void. 

 

Robbed of something he very much anticipated feeling.

Robbed of something he very much anticipated doing.

Robbed of the chance to protect.

To revenge.

 

 

There’s three little genins staring up at him and he frowns, tearing himself from his stupor.

 

The skin under his finger is clam and the heartbeat nonexistent when he checks it.

There is no satisfaction.

 

He raises his eyes to the hunter ninja with the mask that bears the mark of waves, the voice and height close to that of his genins. But already a hunter. He shoots a look at Sakura, Sasuke and Naruto. No comparison there. 

 

Naruto is running up to him, yelling, and Kakashi reaches out instinctively, pats his head, the relief at seeing him more or less unharmed so strong it takes his breath for a long moment. Thank god. The hair still feels like spun gold between his fingers. Shivering through his soul. Easy now. His tongue feels twice the size in his mouth. Answering Naruto’s instinctive inquiry. “There’s people on the world younger than you and stronger than me.” There’s people that would like to see it burn.

 

Naruto trembles under his fingers, und suddenly Kakashi doesn’t care for Zabuza anymore, doesn’t care what exactly the hunter wants to do.

All that matters is that they are alive, here, now.

 

He turns his head to look at Naruto just as the hunter ninja takes Zabuza away, but the world blurs suddenly, and Kakashi curses viciously, and Naruto’s cry is loud in his mind, and then the blackness swallows him, and finally the sharingan dims, at last.

 

As always, it is a relief.

As always, it comes with terror.

 

No, not … now.

 

 

 

Reality ignores his plea.

 

But then he’s used to that.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He comes back to himself, laid out on a futon, with the sounds of three very bored little genins running, squabbling, nagging, whining, jumping, and thumping around. 

The thumping of little feet against wood especially is a perfect match for the throbbing headache Kakashi has, and he grumbles to himself, wondering how he could have ever called the little imps cute. 

“Sensei!”

Naruto’s cry is loud and Kakashi winces, glad to realize that someone pushed his hitai-ate over his eye at least, the blessed blackness of his left-eye vision reducing the drain to a bare minimum. And then his breath is pushed out from him, as Naruto throws himself over him, the arms going round Kakashi’s neck, and the headache pulses viciously, but it doesn’t matter, because his nose is full of sunshine, dimming all the pain, and driving home the fact that they are, indeed, alive. 

 

He tries to move his arms, but he cannot, and he closes his eyes for a moment, allowing himself to lean into the embrace for this instant of time, this split second that he has this for himself. 

The moment that he is allowed to enjoy. Right?

 

And then Naruto is dragged off by Sakura, who yells at him for bothering the poor Sensei, and Sasuke stares down at him with an indecipherable expression, and Tazuna chuckles somewhere to his right, and his daughter Tsunami scolds them all, and something in Kakashi relaxes, unclenches at the normalcy, the life.

Naruto turns back to him from being dragged off a bit by Sakura, his face excited and relieved, carrying a huge grin. “Sensei, are you alright again?”

Kakashi grunts, feeling his eyelids grow heavy again, now that he knows he can rest. “I will probably need to rest for a week or so.”

Naruto stares at him, flabbergasted. “A week?”

Kakashi hums, feeling sleep tug at him again, already. “Mah, mah, relax. I won’t sleep for that lo…”

And dream takes him, without terror, this time.

 

And for once, without nightmares.

Just with the sun, tickling his skin.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“Shhh. You’re waking him up.”

 

“Pfft, he’s been sleeping for 10 hours, why should he wake now?!”

 

“Yeah, but if he does it’s your fault.”

 

“Why mine?”

 

“Because you’re not getting a move on.”

 

“And you’re clumsy.”

 

“Ugh, shut up, Sasuke.”

 

“Now, do it, teme, else he really wakes.”

 

“Yeah, yeah, why do I have to do it though?”

 

“It was your idea, was it not?”

 

“And you’re calling me a coward.”

 

“Shut up, both of you, and pull down the mask, dammit.”

 

Silence, and Kakashi tries not to grin, tries not to react, as the blanket shifts with the weight of a youngster trying very, very hard to be sneaky.

 

He opens his eyes the moment fingers touch his mask, and there is a small cry and something resembling a screech as Sakura and Naruto fall back and scramble off his bed in a rush, both their heads beet red. Sasuke is not in his range of vision, but he can feel him hovering off to the side, pretending to be bored, and pretending to be uninvolved.

 

He narrows his eyes, debating scolding them, but choosing to let it slip for now, silently vowing to have a bit of fun with their curiosity later on. He yawns instead, making his voice bored. “Mah, how long have I been sleeping this time?”

Tazuna kneels down at his side, offers him some water, which Kakashi accepts. “You have been asleep for over 10 hours. It is now morning once more.”

Kakashi hums, nodding his thanks. “I see.” He frowns, watching the reflections of the light on the ceiling, thrown in through the window by the waves outside. Waves… There is something niggling at the back of his mind. 

Sasuke pipes up, his tone hard somehow. “Yeah, you were still for so long we thought you were dead.”

Kakashi blinks, the unease in his gut increasing tenfold. His voice is raspy. “No worries. It was just chakra depletion.” From the eye I cannot shut off, he doesn’t say. 

 

Naruto is pulling himself up again, while Sakura is gliding off to the side, pretending she didn’t egg him on. Kakashi stares straight ahead, trying to pin the thought down. And then it clicks, and he groans, closing his eyes for a long moment. “Zabuza isn’t dead.”

Sakura cries out. “He isn’t?” 

Naruto yells. Happily. “Oh, that’s good, I want to fight him.”

Baka. Kakashi winces, pulling a face. “The hunter ninja wouldn’t need his whole body, and he used medical needles. It think it’s safe to say we were fooled just then.” I, I was fooled back then. Dammit. I was too relieved to see him fall. Too drained to actually think.

There’s a taste on his tongue that may or may not be chocolate-tasting self-hatred. 

 

Sasuke’s voice carries unease. “So, what do we do? You cannot fight.”

Kakashi shakes his head on the pillow. “No worries. He will not be able to fight either. For a while.”

Sakura is holding her hands in front of her face, clasped. “And then?”

Kakashi exhales. “We have to defeat him.”

Sasuke scoffs. “How?”

Kakashi tilts his head, looks up at him. “You will train.”

Naruto whoops, loudly. “Finally, we’ll learn new justus!”

You wish, you imp. Kakashi smirks to himself. “You’re all maturing, progressing rapidly, growing in your powers already. Especially you, Naruto.” And that is the truth. That tactic to free me was very good The boy blushes, with a smile that Kakashi echoes, behind his mask. “So, training, yes. Tomorrow morning.”

Three groans reach his ears, two loud, one quiet and Kakashi chuckles a bit meanly, falling back asleep to the thump thump thump of Naruto’s foot against the wooden bed frame. 

 

He silently vows to rap the little imp over the head for that.

 

Later.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto is there, vibrating with energy and excitement when he wakes again, holding out a crutch for Kakashi to take, as if all the sorrows of the world could be resolved through using it.

 

Kakashi blinks at him, and then takes the crutch, slowly, putting it down next to his blanket. He smirks softly, noting that the house itself is quiet now, the other occupants apparently outside. “Thank you, Naruto.” He quirks an eyebrow. “Where is everybody?”

Naruto smirks, beaming with pride. “Outside. Fishing.”

Kakashi blinks at him, pushing himself up into a seating position, slowly. “Fishing?”

Naruto nods energetically, words tumbling from his mouth. “Uh huh. I showed Sakura and Sasuke, and of course Inari knew already, and he showed them how to tie a lure, and now they’re trying them out, but I want to go and train, dattebayo, and so Tazuna and I built a crutch for you, and then I sat here and waited, because it’s morning again, you know, and I want to become better, and I want to…”

 

Kakashi holds up his hand, and Naruto trails off, his eyes big and huge on him. Kakashi looks down at the crutch for a moment, notes the way it’s hastily but sturdily put together from bamboo canes. 

Kakashi clicks his tongue, trying to stay with a neutral tone and failing, suddenly yearning to reach out, yearning to hug Naruto. He clenches his fists on the blanket, forces the words out calmly. “That was quite a tactic you put together against Zabuza.”

Naruto blushes just a bit, grinning broadly. “Yeah, we had to get you out of the water prison after all.” He shifts from one foot to the other. “And you said to never leave anybody behind, so I knew you didn’t mean for us to truly flee.”

 

Oh Naruto. Kakashi swallows harshly, tries to convey the importance through his tone. “Naruto, there are times where fleeing is more important than staying. Because if you flee, you can come back and fight another day, and then maybe save your comrades. While if you stay against enemies that are so much stronger than you…”

Naruto interjects, his tone heated. “I promised that I will never, ever back down again. Never hesitate, never flee.” He points a shaking finger at Kakashi. “You said that I should make sure to keep my word.” He points the finger at himself. “I will keep my word. That is my ninja way.”

 

Kakashi stares at him, for a long moment.

And then he smiles, behind his mask, looking away and at the window, through which the early morning sun filters in. His throat clicks as he speaks, a premonition shivering through him. “Well… You’ll probably have to suffer again from now on… but don’t change, keep going your way, if that is what you believe.” He looks up at Naruto, looks at the resolution in the blue eyes, the face for a moment overlaid with a shape that’s just vaguely different for a split second, so terribly familiar for an instant. 

He’s aware it sounds like a vow, but he doesn’t care, the words spilling from his soul. “I will try to pave your way, if you let me.”

 

Naruto blinks, staring down at him, his mouth opening to reply, but there’s yelling outside and the moment is broken, and Naruto turns on his heel and runs outside, and Kakashi stares after him, feeling… weird.

His right hand comes to cover his left upper arm for just a moment, holding over the tattoo, but there is no tingling now, no tickles.

No chocolate, on his tongue.

 

Guess… that was just me then. 

 

Huh.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Sakura is a natural at gathering chakra and Kakashi reluctantly and silently congratulates the Sandaime for choosing her as the third member of this team. Or did Iruka do that? He’s almost sure he did. There’s wisdom in a decision like that after all. 

He’s aware he should berate himself for a thought like that but he really cannot bring himself to care.

 

She even manages to explain it to Naruto, who, in turn, granted, is clever enough to ask.

And to congratulate her. 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, looking at Sasuke. You’re much more trapped in your pride, aren’t you.

He pretends to leave them to practice, but watches them from afar, trying not to get his hopes up too much.

Sasuke and Naruto seem to be falling into a natural rivalry, something similar to what he and Guy used to have. But not as relaxed. Kakashi grins to himself. But then I never kissed Guy. The smile drops off his lips again, watching them. 

 

He reflects quietly on the fact that Naruto had to ask what chakra was… something he should know everything about already. And something he possesses in abundance. 

Kakashi frowns, watching Naruto and Sasuke run up the tree again and again. Iruka let you sleep in class while you were learning about that? It seems a bit out of character. But then… Kakashi frowns, remembering all the nights when Iruka’s shoulders had been more than stiff under his hands. All the nights when Iruka’s smile had been forced, for long minutes. 

He probably was glad you slept through some of his classes. 

Kakashi swallows, resigning himself to explain a lot of fundamental stuff to Naruto, at some point or the other. It’s my fault you were in his class after all. Not that the other teachers would have been better. He frowns, the pain harsh and white-hot for a moment. It’s all my fault. He swallows the sudden bitterness down. And yours, Sensei.

Something deep within him relaxes at the realization, or, better, the allowance of this realization, of this admission, here, now. 

But the thought also comes with terrible longing, the void in him calling, wanting, needing. 

 

For a moment he spaces out, remembering the way the scar over Iruka’s nose had felt under his fingertips. How Iruka had giggled, when he had peppered kisses all over it, again and again. 

 

A cry draws him back to reality, and he follows Sasuke’s and Naruto’s stares to see Sakura stand on the high branches triumphantly, her arms crossed, face beaming with pride.

Kakashi raises his chin, hobbles back to them and calls out. “Very good. I guess you’re done with this particular practice.” He turns his gaze to the boys, quirking an eyebrow. “I will return to the house with Sakura. You two know what to do.”

Naruto groans loudly, while Sasuke’s face is pinched, and Kakashi smirks behind his mask, nodding at Sakura. “Come. I’ll show you the next level.”

He turns and hobbles away, to an even louder groan and a sigh.

With a small kunoichi, whose head is held just a little bit higher.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“And now, balance it out. Try to do it on instinct, let your body make the small adjustments. You just focus on keeping the chakra in your feet constantly balanced.”

Kakashi grins behind his mask as Sakura’s tongue sticks out between her teeth, her large green eyes unblinkingly and unseeingly focused. Her arms are spread, as if trying to help her keep her balance, and her knees are turned inwards, giving her legs a vague x-shape. But she is indeed holding her stance on the water’s surface, on her first try, still dry, after Kakashi only explained the basics to her.

Fast learner, extremely intelligent. Her self esteem could use a portion of Naruto’s. 

He calls out again, gently, trying not to break her concentration. “There’s a small wave incoming. Raise your eyes, look at the horizon, and let your in…”

There’s a big splash as Sakura loses her balance, resurfacing with a sputter, looking decidedly disappointed. And like a sad, wet poodle.

Kakashi tries to keep the mirth from his voice. “That was an extremely good first try. Swim to the shore, and walk out again.”

He watches as she does as he asks, inhaling deeply before stepping out onto the water again. 

“Soon, you’ll be able to push up from the water, with your hands on the surface.”

She raises her eyes to his for a moment. “Really?”

He gives her an eye-smile. “Long before your teammates will, believe me.”

She averts her gaze, but he can see the proud smile on her lips. 

You go, girl. “Another wave incoming.”

This time, she holds her balance, though her arms are waggling wildly. 

Kakashi smirks. “Very good, Sakura.” He lets her ride another wave before calling out again. “And now, lower your arms and relax your shoulders.”

Her eyes snap up to his for a moment, and there’s another splash, and Kakashi chuckles soundlessly to himself, curbing his mirth rapidly as Sakura resurfaces, throwing a skunk-eye his way. 

He shrugs, just a bit sheepishly. “Sorry, but you do need to be able to weave signs eventually, so your hands do need to be unoccupied. If you use them for balance even subconsciously you won’t be able to.”

Sakura grumbles something under her breath and Kakashi smirks again, watching her swim to the shore once more. She’s feisty. That’s good. He leans back a bit more, lazily swinging his foot over the water. “And again.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto and Sasuke make a competition out of dinner, too, and Kakashi silently vows to make them really regret it, should they actually throw up from eating too much, the hospitality they’re enjoying not exactly rooted in luxury after all. 

The story they’re told doesn’t help with keeping the conversation light either. Or the fact that Kakashi knows Naruto feels deeply with the boy Inari, who he seems to really like. And who speaks the truth after all.

 

Heroes often die indeed.

 

Naruto pushes up after dinner, stumbling towards the door again, and Kakashi calls to him, vaguely amused. “And where do you think you are going?”

Naruto grins back at him, but his eyes are barely open. “To train of course.”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, and then tilts his head towards the table. “Mah, mah, Naruto, If you push yourself any more you’ll die.”

Sasuke’s eyes snap to his. “He’ll die?”

Kakashi shrugs, while waving Naruto back to the table. “The same thing that happened to me. If you exhaust all your chakra, and I mean all of it, then you’ll die.” Though this is probably more physical exhaustion, with his chakra reserves.

Naruto flops down again at the table, his eyelids drooping. 

Kakashi reaches for his water. “Sleep, all of you. And then train again, tomorrow.”

Naruto looks at him, and then pushes up, some energy in him suddenly. “I’ll prove that there are heroes in the world still.”

Kakashi watches as he stumbles towards the door, and then falls, asleep before he hits the floor. 

He sighs, and gets up, carries him over to the beds, Naruto not even waking when he tucks him in.

 

 

Later, Naruto’s little hand flops against his face, waking him, and he shakes his head, gently pushing the boy back onto his own mattress. Naruto is a… wild sleeper. Limbs flung out, snoring loudly, blanket somewhere. 

Kakashi leans over with a sigh, and pulls the blanket back over him, and Naruto turns, instinctually burrowing in close to him, almost in his arms.

Kakashi freezes, torn every which way, remembering the way cuddling Naruto had felt, so long ago. Knowing he must not. And definitely not here.

He pulls back, something in him hurting like a bitch, and he tries to get back to sleep, his heart beating way too fast.

 

Baka.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

In the morning, Naruto and Sasuke are gone, and Kakashi frowns, taking Sakura to look for them.

 

They’re not at the training ground they picked though, and Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, vaguely unsettled. They walk a bit, conversing easily, the kunai being thrown at their feet bringing a secret smile to Kakashi’s lips.

He pretends to be surprised, raising his eyes to the sparkling blue ones high above. 

And then Naruto tumbles, and Kakashi wants to scream, but then there’s ferocious laughter and Sakura is yelling and Kakashi wants to kill him and then… Naruto actually falls, and Sasuke catches him, smugly. 

Kakashi tries and fails to unlock his jaw. 

Tries to breathe.

He grimly wonders if he can get any whiter, because it sure as hell feels like all the adrenaline has sucked all life force out. All the blood from his limbs.

He is silent as Sasuke and Naruto jump down from the tree.

He is silent as they return to Tazuna’s home.

He is silent through dinner, not eating.

 

At some point he realizes they’re all silent now, watching him.

He tries to unlock his jaw again. 

It takes a lot of force and concentration, and his hand trembles just a bit, when he reaches for the green tea. He lifts it, blows onto it and then forces himself to give his cute little alive genins an eye-smile. His voice is rough when he speaks, but he’s glad that it sounds almost normal. “And tomorrow, you’ll need to make it to the top of the tree.”

 

And I have to get a fucking grip. 

 

 

Like, right now.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

The next morning finds him in better shape, almost restored from his latest bout of sharingan-overusage. He grimly remembers all the time spent in bed in-between missions back then, in the Anbu, the times that were never mentioned by anyone. 

Still. 

sharingan-induced downtime is better than freezing in terror.

That’s is simply unacceptable.

But… how do I prevent it?

 

He asks Tazuna and Sakura to sit on his back and legs, switches to one-finger-push-ups. Almost recovered, yes. He frowns, keeping his eyes on the floor. Sensei, what would you have done? What have you actually done when you went onto missions with Kushina during your jonin time? 

His thoughts keep running in circles, always returning to the question as to what he should do to be actually able to function with Naruto in any kind of danger. But I didn’t freeze in combat, did I. So why yesterday? 

Letting Naruto go to train with Sasuke this morning had been a terrible exercise of pure will, and Kakashi can now truly emphasize with the soul-mated knowing ones, who refuse to be parted. That, too, is unacceptable. Impractical, impossible, just simply unacceptable. He glowers at the wooden floor beneath him, daring it to give him some kind of answer.

 

Tazuna’s voice pulls him from his thoughts. “I am curious, Kakashi-san. Why did you decide to continue the mission? Knowing it would be a much higher ranking one?”

Kakashi frowns, lowering himself and then pushing himself back up again. Sakura shifts on his legs, dangling her legs a bit when he’s all the way up again. “I…” He hesitates, a memory of Minato raising his finger and lecturing them flashing through his mind. He smiles behind his mask, quoting. “To know what is right and choose to ignore it is the act of a coward.” The smile turns wistful, his voice gentling on the words. “Like master like man.”

He blinks, doing another push-up. That’s it, isn’t it, Sensei. That simple? I knew what to do and so I did it? But yesterday… I wasn’t able to do anything about it, and I didn’t know what to do, and that almost… killed me. He swallows, returning his thoughts to Tazuna with an effort. “True shinobi do not merely dance to the tune of whoever pays the piper.”

 

Sakura shifts again on his legs, and Kakashi knows she’s mulling over what he’s said. It’s a direct contradiction to what they’re taught, told, indoctrinated, and Kakashi grimly smirks in the sudden silence. He lowers himself to the floor slowly, gently tapping his fingers on the floor. “Thank you, both of you.”

Tazuna pushes up with a sigh, stretching with a groan. “Of course, Kakashi-san. Have you recovered?”

Kakashi waits until Sakura has stood up as well, before jumping up into a crouch and then pushing into a standing position. “I believe so. Thank you for helping me train.”

Tazuna laughs. “My pleasure.” He hesitates, before continuing. “I didn’t know Shinobi were that strong.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “And yet I am not. There are many, who are much stronger than me.”

Sakura blurts out, hands in front of her mouth. “Stronger than you?”

Kakashi gives her an eye-smile. “Oh yes, many. Tsunade-sama for example is said to be as strong as a giant.”

She blinks at him. “Tsunade-sama?”

He nods. “She is one of the legendary three Sannin. And the first Hokage’s granddaughter. I believe there may be no-one stronger than her, actually.”

Sakura’s eyes are huge. “I… I did not know a kunoichi could become this strong.”

Kakashi tilts his head, keeps his voice soft, non-scolding. “Do you not believe that strengths and weaknesses come in many forms?”

Sakura shrugs, silent. 

Kakashi sighs through his nose. “Our physical form as ninjas does not dictate our abilities. We are born with affinities and talent, yes. Some of us with inherited abilities, too. But determination and willpower will be the deciding factors in your life, Sakura. Set your mind to it, and find a way.” He leans forward a bit, grinning at her. “I know you’re clever enough to do that, mhhh?”

She blushes, deeply.

He wonders why he doesn’t have this overpowering need to ruffle her hair, or Sasuke’s.

Yeah, why… He quietly scoffs at himself.

Kakashi pushes up again, with a small sigh, just as the door flies open, and two very tired, very dirty and smelly little genins stumble into the hut, supporting each other. Naruto grins at them, his smile lopsided but proud. “We made it to the top of the tree.”

Kakashi gives them a nod, allowing his elation and relief to color his voice. “Good.”

 

Naruto and Sasuke flop down at the table, their shoulders touching, lightly swaying while sitting. Kakashi grins behind his mask. Tsunami brings some food and refreshments, and Inari helps distribute them around the table. He is glowering at Naruto in between, obviously building up to something, and Kakashi notes how both he and Sakura just keep watching him, waiting. 

 

And then Inari breaks, yelling, pointing a finger at Naruto.”It’s all senseless, and you’re only going to get yourself killed. Heroes die here, like…” He sniffs, a tear running down his cheek.

Naruto surprises them all by almost snarling at Inari, his blue eyes glowing. “And, so what? Do you want to cry forever?”

Inari stares at him in shock, and then runs out, and Kakashi sighs quietly through his nose, looking at Naruto for a long moment. 

Naruto, whose whiskers twitch with the emotions he is barely able to hold in check, staring unseeingly straight ahead. 

Naruto, who Kakashi has held, back then, his neck touching the pillow wet with tears of loneliness and hurt.

 

Naruto, who refuses to back down, daring life to come at him.

 

Kakashi sighs, and then gets up, to go after Inari, waving at Tsunami to stay.

He keeps his steps audible, hovers behind the small boy, who is sitting on the porch, feet dangling over the night waters. “May I join you?”

There is a little sniff that Kakashi pretends not to hear. But there’s also a small nod and Kakashi quietly lowers himself down next to the boy, looks out over the waters, hands clasped in his lap. 

He tries to keep his voice light. “You know Naruto’s kind of a brat but he wasn’t trying to be mean or hateful….” Another sniff and Kakashi sighs, inaudibly. “He just lacks… finesse…” Yeah, and whose fault is that? Kakashi swallows. “Tazuna-san told us what happened to your father. Naruto grew up without a father, same as you.” 

And a mother. Or actual adults caring for him. 

Well, most of the time.

The hurt and anger rise for a moment, and Kakashi lets them ebb away again, trying to stay relaxed. He clears his throat, deciding to tell. “… Actually without any parents, he doesn’t remember either of them.” I do though. Every day, every second. “Or having a single friend.” I removed the only friend he did have, because I was too weak to go against the Hokage’s wishes. 

That pain is surprisingly sharp still. “His whole life is one big, painful memory.” We have that much in common. He almost laughs. 

Inari’s voice is breaking. “R…really?”

Kakashi looks down at him, deciding to embellish, just a bit. “And in all the time I’ve known him, I’ve never seen him cry.” Not officially, at least… “Or use his troubles as an excuse to sulk or be a coward. Not once.” He exhales, allowing a small, private smile. “He always… tries his hardest, hoping someone will notice and give him a kind word, or a pat on the back.”

Or a hug. 

There is a sob, stuck in his throat, and Kakashi tries to swallow it down, keeps it out of his voice with an effort. “That’s his dream, and he’s risked his life for it.”

He wants to be loved.

He dreams about being loved.

 

He… demands to be loved.

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long moment, and then stares down into the water, unblinking. “I think… one day, he must have gotten fed up with crying.” The pain in his chest blooms, and he allows it to encompass all he feels for a moment, feels his skin shiver, his vision wavering. “He knows what it means to be strong. What it costs, and what it’s worth….” 

Just as I do.  

 

He turns back to Inari, trying to make him feel the words. “… Just like your father did.” He sighs. “Naruto probably understands you and knows what you feel better than any of the rest of us.”

There is a very bitter smile on his lips at the words. 

Inari sniffs, his lower lip quivering. “Really?”

Kakashi gives him an eye smile. “He probably cannot leave you alone because you and your situation have gotten under his skin.”

He looks out over the water, watches the moon’s reflection for a long moment. “Well.” He clears his throat. “Please take care of Naruto. He’s worn himself out.” He grins to himself. “I doubt he’ll be able to move for the rest of the day.”

 

He stays there with Inari, looking out over the dark water, until the little boy falls asleep, against his side. He puts his arms around him, and then gently scoops him up, sharing a look with Tsunami when he re-enters the house, and goes up and puts him down onto his bed. 

 

Naruto is snoring, spread out, and his arm is on Kakashi’s futon once more when Kakashi comes down the stairs again, the funny little cap he wears askew on his head. 

Kakashi sighs and then chuckles, settling down around the intruding limbs, Naruto’s right hand so near he can smell the skin. He falls asleep like that, feeling so incredibly close he could cry.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He’s actually relieved when Naruto is still out cold the next morning, but leaving him there is like leaving a limb behind. Again. Kakashi shakes his head at himself, while herding his other genin along, with Tazuna trailing after them. 

Finishing the bridge is drawing closer, and Kakashi is really looking forward to leaving, to having his team safe, back in Konoha. 

He wonders if he’ll be that lucky though.

If he’s allowed to be that lucky.

 

He knows he is not when fog rises, once more.

 

Same old, same old.

“Protect Tizuna-san.” 

 

Sasuke dispatches the water bunshin this time, with ease, and Zabuza remarks on his maturing, with a click of his tongue. 

Kakashi tries to keep his shoulders down, keeps his hands in his pockets. “It seems I was right. Our masked friend plays on Zabuza’s team.” Too bad. Dammit. 

Sasuke challenges them, loudly, and Kakashi watches as Sakura just fawns adoringly. She’s challenging everything Naruto says or does, but takes Sasuke at face value, without question. Kakashi frowns. That will only get her hurt at some point. His focus is redirected as Sasuke charges, engaging Haku in a skirmish that has Zabuza stare. 

 

Kakashi smiles grimly, while keeping his voice bored. “That’s right. You had that coming… for underestimating my team. And for name-calling. He may not look like much, but he is one of the top rookies of Konohagakure.” He tilts his head. “And Sakura here is one of the sharpest.” He smirks to himself, deciding to use Naruto’s absence as a way to shake Zabuza’s confidence. “And let’s not forget our own… comedy ninja, our maverick, the show-stopper and one and only Naruto.” Make him chew on that one for a moment. Wonder where Naruto actually is at. He narrows his eyes. 

 

Zabuza stares at him, and then starts to laugh, a full-bellied laugh, throwing his words over his shoulder. “Haku, you do realize you could die at the hands of someone you wish to spare?”

Kakashi blinks, frowning, and then water glints in the air, and mirrors rise, ice mirrors? I don’t know this jutsu, and Zabuza is there, staring at him from a few feet away. “Let’s not forget that I am your enemy, hmmm?”

Kakashi stares past him at the ice mirror cage, watches in rising horror as Sasuke is fighting a losing battle. Sakura realizes it too, obviously, because she throws a kunai, which is easily deflected. Kakashi doesn’t need to see Zabuza’s face to know he’s grinning, and he’s about to push up his hitai-ate again to use his sharingan, when there is a yell, and then a puff of smoke.

 

And then Naruto is there, and Kakashi groans, with a passion. 

Baka. What we needed was an ambush, not for you to paint a target on yourself! He cannot help himself, he’s furious at Naruto, dimly aware that this emotions keeps the fear in check at least. He watches as Zabuza throws some shuriken at Naruto and Sasuke, faster than he can react, but Haku deflects them, asking for this fight. 

Which Zabuza grants, and cold dread settles in KakashI’s stomach. This confidence. He swallows, watching Naruto and Sasuke squabble inside the mirror dome. Leave it to the team maverick for the situation to go from bad to worse. 

It’s almost funny. Almost.

 

He reflects silently about the fact that Zabuza is only holding him in check, not attacking, while watching Haku and the boys discuss about their dreams. He isn’t attacking. He’s just waiting for the winds to turn in his favor. Meaning he is afraid of me. Of my eye, likely.

Kakashi reaches for his hitai-ate, wanting to push it up. Saying it with a confidence he doesn’t quite feel yet. “You’ll forgive me if I end this now…”

Zabuza sneers at him. “The sharingan once more? How vulgar…”

Vulgar. Kakashi grins sharply. 

And then he stops the arching kunai with his right hand, the warm rush of blood smelling like copper. He keeps the pain he feels from his voice. “You can sneer all about my ‘lack of finesse’, Zabuza… but it doesn’t change the fact that you’re afraid of the sharingan.” He quirks an eyebrow. “Of me.”

Zabuza sneers at him again, pushing Haku’s narrative and skills. Kakashi shifts his stance, not really listening, waiting for the moment the kunai will leave his hand. There. The moment Zabuza withdraws the blade to jab it at Kakashi again, Kakashi withdraws his supporting hand, and pushes up his hitai-ate immediately, his tone icy. “Is there something duller, than listening to someone else brag?”

 

He knows this must be especially grating, since he himself bragged about his little genins, just a little while ago. Zabuza growls at him. Kakashi lets the wheels in the sharingan turn. “It’s show time.”

Zabuza cackles, throwing his words back at him. “Let me borrow your idiom, allow me one more boast.” He vanishes into mist, the words echoing. “The same spell won’t work on me twice.”

Kakashi gnashes his teeth.

Zabuza starts to play with him, teasing him. And then makes a deciding mistake. “My genius is to hunt by sound alone.”

Kakashi smirks, darkly. 

 

And then he has to jump in-between Zabuza and Tazuna, because the big sword is swishing down way too close, in an arc he cannot properly deflect with a kunai. It tears through Kakashi’s vest, as if through butter, leaving a flaming path of pain behind. “Unggggh.” He breathes through the pain, feeling the blood drip down onto the bridge. If this bridge is ever finished, it’s definitely thoroughly baptized already. He almost chuckles, bending a bit forward to let the blood drip onto the blade.

But it is Sakura who is coming through for them all, yelling at Zabuza. “Sasuke won’t be as easy for that kid to defeat. And neither will Naruto.”

Kakashi smiles softly behind his mask, weirdly proud of her. “You’re right.” Zabuza’s eyes snap to his, just a little bit wildly. Kakashi continues, almost gently. “I have faith in them and in their strengths. Naruto’s unpredictability… and Sasuke is on of the most worthy heirs of the most superior bloodline of Konohagakure.” Even if that bloodline may be… cursed.

 

Zabuza vanishes again, and Kakashi calls back over his shoulder, softly. “Don’t move an inch, Sakura.” Out loud he calls to Zabuza again, with anticipation and glee now. “Do you really believe I could have survived in this world, with all the hardships, solely through my sharingan?” He tilts his hand, catches some of the blood in it. “I was once a member of the Anbu.” A leader. “Let me show you one of my own arts.” He licks his lips. “I‘ll show you what kind of ninja I used to be.“

What kind of a ninja I am, still. Will always be.

 

There is a burst of chakra suddenly, from the mirrors, and everyone freezes, the hatred oozing from that chakra stifling. Kakashi stares at the red orange glow, his mind frantic, heart beating a thousand miles an hour. Is the seal broken? No… I… sense it is still intact. Slipped a little, cracked, but it’s still… just some of the fox’ energy bleeding out. If I… hurry… I have to hurry. If more of the fox leaks out I might lose him. WE might lose him.

I cannot allow that.

He licks his lips, a bit frantic. “Alright, you know Zabuza, I’m busy, you’re busy, and I know this goes against the grain to even suggest this, but why don’t we stop screwing around and stop this right now? One big move, the winner takes it all?”

Zabuza sneers, vanishing into mist. “An interesting notion, Kakashi. What’s left? Show me what you’ve got.”

Kakashi smiles, sharply. Puts a bit of flourish into the motions, twirling the scroll.

And then he bends down, presses his bloody palm to the ground. “Earth style fanged vengeance technique!”

 

His dogs, his nin-ken, his… friends burst from the ground.

 

It is over, real fast. There is a yipping and a howling and then the sickly sound of jaws snapping locked on flesh and metal, and Kakashi pushes up, turning towards Zabuza as the mist clears. He steps forward, thoroughly enjoying the way Pakkun hangs on Zabuza’s hitai-ate. “This conjuration is especially used for tracking.” He rubs his fingers together, feeling the sticky substance of his congealing blood. “I went out of my way to bleed a bit in our earlier encounters…” He grins. “My little ninja pups couldn’t miss it.” He swears he can hear Pakkun’s annoyed huff at being called a pup. “Every dog has a nose and… you stink.” He raises his fingers, staring at Zabuza with his sharingan. “So who is enmeshed in whose spell now?” He quirks an eyebrow. “I see your future… And your future is death.”

 

Chidori chirps up, sizzling in the air. “You’re too dangerous to be allowed to live.”

Too dangerous to us, too dangerous to the future of this village. 

He charges, and then there is a cry from Naruto and then wet warmth, around his wrist, and bones, scratching his skin. Only… Too close. Too early. 

His dogs vanish in a puff of smoke as dread settles and rips his concentration to shreds, and Kakashi stares into Haku’s dark and determined and breaking eyes, the face overlaid with lilac stripes for a moment, and his name, tumbling from a painful smile. Rin… what

The moment breaks, with Zabuza’s laughter. “You missed again, Kakashi.”

 

Zabuza charges and Kakashi grows cold, realizing Zabuza is planning to go through the already dead boy to get to him. He jumps away with the body, pulls out his wrist in the process. Haku’s eyes are void, empty, and he closes them, ignoring Zabuza’s taunting.

Somewhere off to the side Naruto screams at Zabuza and Kakashi addresses him, calmly, feels his tattoo tingle, knows suddenly, that Naruto’s does, too. That he feels his words. “Naruto, stay out of this.” He looks up, sees Zabuza flinch. “This is my fight.”

Sakura yells, loudly. “Naruto, you’re alive. Where is Sasuke?”

Kakashi glances at her, and Zabuza takes this perceived weakness, charges, with a yell.

 

Kakashi kicks him back.

Zabuza stumbles, eyes wide, and then charges again, with a cry.

Kakashi simply backhands him, still feeling cold, so cold. 

How dare you. 

 

How dare you come at me NOW.

 

Zabuza jumps back, roaring now, his eyes furious. 

Kakashi tells him it is over, moments before he simply disables both of Zabuza’s upper arms with his kunais. There’s no Haku to save you now. No-one to save you from my… wrath.

Keeps me… in check by threatening those I…

 

He stops the thought. 

He should feel satisfaction, but he only feels coldness, and hate for the warmth around his wrist, and the breaking gaze of someone sacrificing themselves. 

It shouldn’t matter who it is, should it. 

Not when I aimed to destroy a heart.

 

But it does.

 

It does.

 

 

He watches Zabuza twitch, futilely.

 

Debates pulling the kunai out and slashing Zabuza’s throat. 

 

In the distance, his cute little blond genin is staring, blue eyes wide. 

Kakashi exhales, deliberately relaxing his muscles, one by one.

Save just a little bit of his innocence, if you can, baka.

 

Actually, save as much as you possibly can.

 

Any further decision he might need to make is taken from him as Zabuza’s client arrives, with a mob. Gateau is as slick as Kakashi expects him to be, and just as disgusting, the moment he deliberately kicks Haku’s body burning itself into Kakashi’s mind.

 

Kakashi’s hand flies out by itself, holds Naruto back.

Naruto, who is yelling at Zabuza, screaming, defending his enemy, defending Haku, defending his honor, his reputation, his body

Kakashi swallows, blinking the tears away. Oh Naruto. I doubt I could be more proud of you. 

 

Naruto, who is demanding respect.

Naruto, who is making Zabuza cry.

Naruto, who wins, factually, morally, with his words.

 

Naruto, who throws his kunai to Zabuza, when the broken demon of Kirigakure asks for it.

 

Kakashi wants to hug Naruto, badly. 

He refrains, his fingers twitching futilely. 

 

Zabuza charges, with a cry. 

The fight is short, and bloody. 

 

Naruto trembles next to him and Kakashi feels the hand climb up his leg, up to his waist, lock into the cloth of his armor. 

 

Kakashi swallows, nods at the turmoil. “Look at how he chooses to die, Naruto. Every ninja will have to choose how to die, at some point.” He inclines his head, looks down at the little face with the huge eyes, staring past him. The words feel like ash in his mouth. He forces them out. “You will have to decide how to die, at some point.” Naruto blinks up at him, for a moment, and Kakashi’s heart thuds, viciously, once. “Choose wisely.”

  Choose to die for someone you love.

 

The hand clenched into his armor tightens, and Naruto looks back to the flurry of limbs and weapons. 

 

It’s over way too soon and the mob turns to them, as if with a single mind. 

Kakashi curses, viciously and then… smiles, as Inari shows up, with the villagers, to defend them.

Another one you reached with your words, and your heart, Naruto.

His own heart flutters.

Naruto snarls a smile, the hand leaving Kakashi, raised into the concentration seal. “Kage Bunshin no jutsu!”

Little Narutos flare up all around them and Kakashi smiles softly, reaching for his own chakra reserves. Maybe… it’s enough for a last illusion. He concentrates and then disguises them, hundreds of Kakashis staring at the mob, their red eyes burning through the remaining mist, like lasers.

 

Kakashi watches the mob flee, with satisfaction.

There is something to be said for a reputation, indeed. 

 

He pushes himself up with an effort, squeezing Naruto’s hand for a short moment before he walks over to where Zabuza’s body is laying on the bridge, hearing Naruto rush back to Sasuke, with a cry. They’re all alive, thank god. He pushes his hitai-ate down, breathing a sigh of relief as the blessed darkness falls, just as Zabuza addresses him, his breath gurgling wetly around the words. “Kakashi… do me… a favor?”

Kakashi blinks, kneeling down. “What is it?” I think I know.

Zabuza’s words are labored. “I want to… see… his face.”

Kakashi swallows. “Sure.” He bends down and draws out the weapons still sticking out of Zabuza’s back matter of factly, and then picks Zabuza up, carries him over to where Haku is laying, the pretty face peaceful. He puts Zabuza down, gently, helps him turn to Haku, snowflakes settling over their prone forms, like frozen tears.

Kakashi blinks, wondering if he would find black tattoos somewhere, if he were to look. If Haku is really waiting, for the one he gave his life for. 

I hope he is. 

 

There’s something stuck in Kakashi’s throat.

Naruto is there suddenly, again, at Kakashi’s side, his hand clenched into the cloth of Kakashi’s pants again, holding fast. Reaching for Kakashi. Wanting the connection.

Subconsciously at least.

Reaching for… Kakashi turns his gaze to Naruto for a moment, wondering if he’ll be waiting for Naruto in the afterlife at some point. Or if Naruto will be. Meaning that…

Bile rises in his throat, and he hastily banishes the thought, a kind of belated panic rising in him. He returns his attention to Zabuza with an effort, his voice breaking on the words. Knows that he is sending him off. “You can go with him, Zabuza. Go to that place… with him.”

 

Naruto’s little hand finds his, his fingers threading through Kakashi’s.

He shifts his hand, presses their palms together. His blood runs through Naruto’s fingers, and drips to the ground. Like a promise. 

A… vow. Another one.  

 

I’ll bleed for you.

Whenever I can.

 

Kakashi’s mouth is dry.

 

Naruto’s fingers tighten, and the resulting pain from the wound in his palm grounds him, tethers him to this world, just as the other one takes Zabuza, silently, like a snowflake melting.

 

 

 

 

Life, there, intricate and unique and beautiful and then… simply… gone.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Naruto doesn’t drop his hand, for long minutes.

No-one says anything, Sakura holding Sasuke up, and Tazuna watches them stand there, mourn their enemies. Inari is watching from the other side, the villagers behind him quieting down slowly, picking up the mood.

Kakashi blinks down at Naruto, watches as some sixth sense makes Naruto look up at him. He gives him a small eye-smile, squeezes the hand softly. The words drip off his tongue by themselves, gently, unobtrusively. “Why didn’t you kill Haku, mhh?” Back then, when the fox raged. What made you stop?

Naruto blinks, looking down at the still form for a moment, and then back up at Kakashi. “I… I had met him in the woods… the other morning.”

Kakashi hums, swallowing. His voice is rough. “I guess we’re lucky you came back then.”

 

He can see Naruto shake his head from the corner of his eye. There is a tug on his hand to make him look down. “No, it wasn’t like that. He…” Naruto trails off, shaking his head, and then stares up at Kakashi with huge eyes, that are filled with… something. “He was a girl then. He was collecting flowers.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Ah. And you talked?”

Naruto shrugs. “I didn’t recognize him then. Her. I…” He blinks, shrugging again. “She was so nice to me. So pretty. When I saw it was her, I mean him behind the mask… I couldn’t.” He shrugs again. “I… I knew the soul, and I just couldn’t kill him.”

Kakashi blinks, staring down at him. You knew the soul… “Are… Do you often know the soul?”

Naruto shrugs once more, looking down at his feet for a moment. “I don’t know. Sometimes. Sometimes I know people. And I… sometimes I cannot help myself. I have to reach out.”

Kakashi looks down at their clasped hands, not daring to ask.

 

Naruto looks up at him, and there is this moment where the world is gone, and his tattoo burns, and he knows Naruto’s tattoo tingles, and then the moment is gone, shattering as Sasuke is pushing himself up with a groan, and Naruto runs over to him, the sudden absence of his hand in Kakashi’s painful.

 

Kakashi closes his eyes and concentrates on breathing for a long, long moment, before calling over to Inari to ask for help with the bodies, utterly and totally unwilling to feed them to the crows.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“Do you think it is wise to leave Kubikiribōchō here?”

Kakashi hums, tracing the handle of the sword for a moment before turning to Sasuke. “Probably not. But I have a feeling we will see it in action once more, someday. Let fate decide what will happen with it.”

Naruto pouts, arms crossed. “You could take it with you? Isn’t it yours now?”

Kakashi chuckles, reaching out to ruffle his hair. “Probably. But I already wield a powerful weapon, and one that is heavy enough to carry. Let someone else try their hands at this. If it is truly mine, it’ll come back to me.”

Naruto rolls his eyes, mumbling something under his breath. 

Sakura blinks up at him. “Do you often leave things to fate, Sensei?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. Not if I can help it. “Actually… no. But life tends to come with funny quirks, and sometimes it’s fun to see if it will find a way, you know?”

Sasuke grunts. “That’s stupid.”

Kakashi shoots him a look but doesn’t reprimand him. “Maybe. We’ll see.”

 

Sasuke glowers at him, his voice harsh, nodding at the two earthen mounds. “Did you take that other weapon from a grave like this? I mean, I am the last Uchiha.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, and then goes over and flips his finger against Sasuke’s forehead just below the headband. Sasuke hisses, rubbing the smarting skin and Kakashi leans down a bit, making his voice stern. “You may be the last Uchiha now, Uchiha Sasuke, but there was a time when members of your clan were quite a common sight in Konoha.” He pushes up, reaching for an equilibrium for his voice he doesn’t feel. “It was a gift.”

Sasuke’s voice is definitely pouty. “Must have been someone dying for you to get it as a present.”

Kakashi gives him an eye-smile that probably looks as fake as it feels. “Indeed.”

Silence for a long moment, as his little genins stomach the information.

Sakura pipes up again, first. “And the sharingan is constantly draining your chakra?”

Kakashi nods, reaching for his backpack. “Yes. Since I am no Uchiha I cannot turn it off. And I cannot advance it further, not like Sasuke has done during the fight, awakening the second tomoe.”

 

Sakura turns and falls into step next to him, a frown on her face. “But if it’s a constant drain, doesn’t that mean that you weren’t able to unleash your full potential yet because of it? Sensei Iruka always said that one would need to know their bodily and chakra limits in order to advance oneself.”

Kakashi hums, looking back to see Sasuke and Naruto trail after them, silently, listening intently. He sighs, almost inaudibly. “Yes and no. On one hand the sharingan has always limited my abilities in regards to chakra amount and strength and I tend to have long recovery periods if I overuse it. On the other hand I am able to use jutsus because of it I wouldn’t be able to use otherwise.”

Naruto pipes up, not really asking. “Like the one you killed Haku with?”

Kakashi swallows. “Yes, for example.” He frowns, and then shrugs, continuing. “But also every jutsu the sharingan has ever seen, because it records, if I actually look with it.”

Sasuke interjects, frowning. “So you do activate it.”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Yes and no. It is always ready, on standby, if you will. But I do not always record or replay with it.”

 

They are silent for a moment, reaching the edge of the woods. Kakashi looks back at the graves for a moment, and then turns down the path, feeling lighter than he has for a long while. 

Sasuke closes up to him, looking up. “Do you…” He trails off and Kakashi looks down, waiting. Sasuke shrugs and then sighs, looking back up. “I know there were eyes that were able to do other stuff, too. Can you do that as well?”

Kakashi looks away for a moment, Kamui flitting through his brain, the word coming with a peculiar, indecipherable sensation, as always. He hesitates for a moment, and then shrugs. “I am not sure. Years ago, there was a moment…” He shakes his head once, looking down at Sasuke. “I will need to find out at some point.”

Sasuke raises his chin. “Why don’t you find out now?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, tilting his head. “Remember what happened when I actually used the eye to copy Zabuza’s jutsus?”

Sasuke looks away, a look on his face that is a mix of stubbornness and embarrassment. 

Kakashi sighs, squeezing his shoulder for a moment. “One day, I will find out. And you will advance your eyes, I guess.” Tragedy cannot help but find you I bet. He gives Sasuke an eye-smile, that he hopes is somewhat reassuring. “And then we can go and compare them, hmmm?”

Sasuke ducks his head, but Kakashi can see that there is a small smile on his lips. 

 

Sakura falls into step next to Sasuke for a moment. “Do all of us possess some kind of kekkei genkai?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No. Though a lot of the higher clans do. But those clans have used special… inbreeding to produce those jutsus, which, as I probably do not have to tell you, led to other kind of problems.” 

Sakura pulls a face, and Sasuke looks away, obviously remembering something. 

Naruto tugs on Kakashi’s sleeve. “Is what I have something like a kekkei genkai?”

Kakashi halts for a moment, and all eyes turn to Naruto, who shrugs, somewhat embarrassed. “What, I mean, I am the only one with whiskers, and something happened on the bridge, right, even if I don’t remember it? It has to be something.”

Kakashi almost snorts. “Indeed.” He hesitates for a moment. “No, you…” He trails off, frowning, before making himself go on, wondering at the absence of chocolate on his tongue. Does the seal not entail the actual knowledge regarding the fox? Or… does it not apply anymore because Naruto has noticed? He clears his throat, shaking his head to clear it as well. “No, you are different. You… have noticed the seal on your stomach?”

Naruto nods silently, and Kakashi can see Sakura frown. 

Kakashi exhales softly. “That seal contains energy that is a part of you.” There is a hint of chocolate on his tongue now, getting stronger. He forces the words out. “It was something like a gift, too.” He turns away, trying to swallow the taste down, hoping against hope that Naruto will drop the subject. 

Naruto runs up to him. “A gift?”

Dammit. Kakashi inhales deeply, nods once. “Yeah. A blessing to make you stronger.”

 

Naruto opens his mouth to inquire further but Sakura interjects, redirecting his focus. “And what about me?”

Kakashi turns to her, insanely glad for the diversion. “You… may not have a kekkei genkai or a… gift like that…” He hesitates, watching her face fall. The smile feels brittle on his lips. “But you have something way more powerful, way more important.”

Her eyes snap to his, as do the boys’ and he leans down a bit, puts his hand onto her head, locking their gazes. “You, Sakura, you still have a family. And as such you will have strength and support that neither of us will have, ever again. Draw from that strength. Use it to protect the ones you love. Use it to extend this kind of protection to your team. Never let go.”

Sakura blinks at him and then pulls a face, crossing her arms. “That’s lame.” She blushes, stammering. “I mean… I… that’s nice… Sensei.”

 

Kakashi chuckles, giving her a little shake. “It may seem that way, Sakura-chan… but believe me, either of us would give their special abilities if they could have what you have.”

Sakura stares up at him and then turns her gaze to Naruto and Sasuke, who both look at her rather solemnly, quiet for once. She swallows, turning back to the path, wordlessly. 

Kakashi starts to walk again, feeling Sasuke trail after him. 

Naruto falls back a bit, his voice sounding forlorn and resolute, in equal measure. “I guess that makes you the only family I have, right?”

Kakashi turns to him, quirking an eyebrow. Telling himself that Naruto didn’t mean the ‘you’ like that. “Mhhh?” 

Naruto looks up at him, with a huge smile. “Well, you are my family, Sensei. You and Sakura and Sasuke and maybe Sensei Iruka, right?”

Kakashi tries to swallow past the sudden lump in his throat. “Yeah, well, I guess?”

Sasuke huffs in annoyance, mumbling ‘baka’ under his breath, while Sakura blushes.

 

Naruto snickers, skidding to close up to them.

There is a moment where they just walk happily, listening to the wind in the trees. 

Sakura breaks the silence once more, eventually. “Sensei… were those two right? Is it true that we are only tools?”

Naruto interjects, his annoyance clear in his tone. “Yeah, I mean, that cannot be it, can it? We are ninjas, not things?”

Kakashi sighs. “A shinobi should not be focused on their own existence, they should only exist to be a tool to be used. That is as true for Konohagakure as it was for them.”

Sasuke shoots Naruto a skunk eye and then focuses back on Kakashi, asking directly. “Is that what you believe, too?”

Kakashi hesitates for a moment, noting that Sakura has not asked further, probably knowing his mind from the last time Tazuna asked a similar question regarding his motivation. “Well… no. You will have to decide for yourself what… kind of ninja you wish to be, since this question will always be part of your life.”

God knows it has taken a long while for me to find my own way. I’ve been a tool for so long. But then… I’ve been so young when I was… used. Too young. Honed from a young age, and no mind of my own.

The thought is very bitter.

Naruto scoffs, pointing his thumb at himself. “I’ll find my own way. I will never be just a tool. I will make my own destiny.”

Kakashi smirks painfully to himself, silently conceding the point. No, you’ll probably never will be just a tool, you little imp. He gives Naruto an eye-smile, watching Sakura and Sasuke dwell on his words. So young still, too. But more free to make that decision, too, no war on their threshold to force their hands.

 

That’s at least something.

 

He smiles to himself, pointing at the bridge they can see in the distance. “But, a ninja can also facilitate change. Like we did.” He shoots a look at Naruto, who simply beams, his hair glinting in the sun. He tilts his head. “Come, let us say goodbye.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi is still chuckling at the memory of Sasuke’s face when Sasuke had heard of the name for the bridge earlier, there, privately behind his mask. 

Naruto is still strutting with his head held high, the fact that a bridge is named after him a huge boost for his ego. 

Sasuke and Sakura are both walking ahead, heads held high as well, pretending to be unaffected.

 

Kakashi snickers quietly. Ahhh, Guy will love this. So will Iruka. His smile turns wistful for a moment, and he looks down at the boy next to him, the boy who is the reason for a lot of his… problems. 

He frowns, silently admonishing himself. No, not the reason. This isn’t his fault either. He’s just… 

Naruto looks up at him, grinning, effectively dispelling the thought.

Kakashi cannot help grin back. “So, gonna tell everyone at home?”

Naruto snickers. “Of course.”

They both chuckle, quietly walking for a moment. 

Naruto looks back up at Kakashi, sobering slowly. “Sensei…”

“Mhhh?” Kakashi looks down at him for a second, before returning his gaze to the horizon. 

 

Naruto huffs, shrugging once. “What should I call Haku when I tell people about… him? Her? I mean, he was so pretty, and he dressed like a girl and behaved like one, too?”

Kakashi frowns, weighing his words carefully for a moment. “Does… that matter?”

Naruto blinks up at him and then pulls a face, shrugging silently. 

Kakashi hums. “How did Zabuza call Haku?”

Naruto is silent for a moment, obviously trying to remember. “Boy.”

Kakashi nods, once. “And Haku obviously accepted that, did he not?”

Naruto nods after a moment.

Kakashi shrugs. “Whether he liked to behave or dress like a girl or if he was one shouldn’t be a factor as to how you remember him, should it? You said you saw his soul, didn’t you?”

Naruto nods again, looking back up. “Yeah, but how do I call him?”

Kakashi raises his shoulders. “By his name?”

Naruto mulls on that for a moment, his voice small when he finally speaks. “Is that all that is to it?”

 

Kakashi snorts, looking up to the sky for a long moment. And then he sighs, shrugging again. “There are people who will tell you that all that matters, a lot. There are people who will tell you that it is all that matters, actually, nicely dividing our world into little boxes, easy to be handled.” He looks down at Naruto for a moment. “Do you think each of us can be fitted into a predefined space?”

Naruto stares at him, for long seconds, then slowly shakes his head. “No, I mean… we’re all different?”

Kakashi bumps into him, lightly, on purpose. “Exactly.”

Naruto is silent for long minutes, and Kakashi relaxes into it, watching the clouds drift by.

When Naruto speaks again he does it in so low a tone that Kakashi almost misses it. “So… it’s not a bad thing if I like my sexy jutsu?”

Kakashi blinks down at Naruto, utterly floored by the question and the change of subject. He shakes his head once, but not in denial. “I… no? Why do you ask?”

Naruto shrugs, looking away and Kakashi can see he’s blushing. “I… I was at Sasuke’s apartment the other day. There is nothing shiny in Sasuke’s apartment, nor are there any flowers or plants… but there are in Sakura’s room, which we visited before. I just…” He trails off.

Kakashi sighs and then halts, stopping Naruto with a hand on his arm. “Naruto, we all are who we are. If you like shiny things, then that is the way it is.” And I might be the one responsible for that, too. “And if you like to surround yourself with living things, then that is something good, too, isn’t it?”

 

Naruto shrugs, a bit listlessly. 

Kakashi blinks, slowly. “What.”

Naruto looks up at him, his eyes full of soul. “I just… I want people to like me. Not find me even more weird.”

Kakashi looks down between them, trying to get his suddenly flaring emotions back under control. He reaches up, ruffles Naruto’s hair lightly, heavily emphasizing his words. “I am sure they will. And for who you are, too. Just give them some time to get to know you.”

Naruto wipes along his nose with his sleeve. “You think so?”

Kakashi chuckles softly, thinking of Iruka. “I know so.”

Naruto sniffs, nodding once. “Okay.”

Kakashi bends down and hugs Naruto gently, carefully, for a long moment.

 

And then he pushes back up, slowly resuming their walk and Naruto falls into step with him, silent again for long minutes. 

Kakashi grins softly behind his mask, knowing he’s building up to ask something else. Just what, that is the question. 

Naruto finally asks, his voice suspiciously unsuspicious. “So, Sensei. When I came back to my senses there on the bridge I saw a bunch of dogs holding Zabuza.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Yes, they’re my pack.”

“Ah.” Naruto stares straight ahead, his little face a bit pinched. 

Kakashi shoots him a look. “Why do you ask?”

Naruto shrugs. “Well, you summoned them…”

Kakashi blinks. “And, so, therefore…?”

Naruto hesitates for a long moment. “I… you remind me of someone.”

 

And he’s gone, running ahead to catch up to Sasuke and Sakura and Kakashi stares after him, his heart beating in his throat, rerunning the words in his head, almost frantically.

 

 

Wondering if… Naruto did recognize him after all. 

 

And… what it means.

 

 

Chapter 11: The things that shape us

Notes:

Asuma!!! Another thing I did not anticipate, but it fits imho? And someone else’s Sensei 😊

And: Ok, there’s 13k between the last chapter note and this one, but I still laughed a bit at myself^^.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

He did expect a lot of things upon their return to Konohagakure, but Iruka knocking onto his apartment door three days after wasn’t one of them. Definitely.

Kakashi stares at him and then steps aside, silently extending his arm to indicate the small living room beyond the miniature entrance. “Please come on… in?” 

He hasn’t been by during the eight years they were an item, Iruka’s house simply so much bigger and nicer. 

And not wall to wall with other jonins. 

 

Having Iruka here, now, is… weird.

Iruka shoots him a tired look and then toes off his shoes, dropping onto Kakashi’s couch with a sigh. Kakashi stares at him for a moment, before pointing his held out arm to the kitchen. “Tea?”

Iruka glowers at him and then nods at the armchair and Kakashi lowers his arm and silently pushes the door shut, sitting down as indicated. 

He tilts his head, raising his spread arms after a moment. “So… what…?”

 

Iruka interrupts, pointing a finger. “Your little…” He breaks off, pressing his lips together and then pressing fingers to the bridge of his nose. And then points those fingers again, tone a bit calmer. “Your…” He breaks off and grimaces, trying again. “Naruto is going round the village, and tries his”, he makes quote signs in the air, “new and improved sexy no jutsu on literally everyone.”

Kakashi stares and blinks and finally… shrugs. “And… that is my fault, how?”

Iruka glowers at him. “He is also telling everyone that his new version is improved to include both masculine and feminine aspects because of a very enlightening talk he had with his Sensei.”

Kakashi stares, frozen. “Huh.” The little shit. He clears his throat. “New and improved, huh?”

Iruka chuckles, darkly. “Ohhhhhh yes. From what I’ve seen he’s vacillating wildly between bombshell blonde and slim dark, trying out the effect and then shifting it until the person he’s aiming it at more or less  passes out from nosebleed.”

 

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, the headache sudden and massive. And mixed with mirth. “I see.”

Iruka hisses at him. “What the hell, Kakashi, the old one was bad enough? And now he’s even better???” He scoffs. “Hell, even I had trouble breathing when he shifted to…” He trails off, blushing furiously. 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, grinning to himself, despite being utterly tired suddenly. “I… see.”

Iruka gnashes his teeth, pointing a finger again. “No, you don’t see. What the ever loving hell have you told him?”

Kakashi shrugs, looking out the window for a moment. “Well, there was a very interesting ninja, who was… I guess gender fluid is the best to describe it? And Naruto asked about it.” He shrugs again. 

Iruka blinks again. “And you told him to include that into his sexy no jutsu?”

Kakashi gapes at him, a bit peeved. “Nooo?! I told him that he is who he is and that that is the way it is. End of story.”

Iruka glowers at him for a moment longer and then falls back onto the couch, hiding his face behind his hands. He is silent for a moment, his tone dry when he speaks. “And of course, Naruto being who he is, he used this new information to try out the effect.”

Kakashi weighs his head, shrugging. “I… probably, yes.” He snorts, pinching the bridge of his nose. “That’s just so typical, the little… imp.”

Iruka snorts too, and then starts to chuckle and Kakashi chimes in, shaking his head. 

 

He sobers slowly, watching the mirth on Iruka’s face for a moment. His tone is a bit wistful. “It’s good to be laughing with you again.” I missed you.

Iruka lowers his hands but keeps his eyes closed for a moment, leaning back forward to rest his elbows on his knees. He nods, silently, before reopening his eyes. “Yeah.” He frowns, watching what he can see of Kakashi’s face. “How was the mission?”

Kakashi sighs, and then shrugs. “Successful.”

Iruka raises his eyebrows. “That good, huh.”

Kakashi looks down, knowing Iruka can see right through his mannerisms. He shrugs again, some of the facade dropping, knowing Iruka is allowed to know. “I… It went from a D-rank to an A-rank, just me and three unexperienced genins, it had sharingan-exhaustion and lots of basic training, and two rogue assassins and Sakura is the reason Naruto and Sasuke actually have some chakra control, and Sasuke awakened his sharingan, and his second tomoe, and Naruto…” He shakes his head, releasing his breath in a rush. “Naruto almost broke the fox’ seal but he also managed to win with his strength and his words and… he kinda hinted to me that he remembers me from when I was visiting him back then, and I‘ve been fretting about how to address that since then.”

Iruka blinks at him, slowly. Repeating, equally slowly. “That good, huh.”

Kakashi snorts, grinning at him. “So, the usual.”

 

Iruka shakes his head at him, but Kakashi can see the smile tug at the corner of his mouth.

Kakashi narrows his visible eye at him. “You let Naruto sleep through the basic chakra control class.”

Iruka has the grace to blush, looking away for a moment. “Yeah, well, that was in the beginning…”

Kakashi nods, his tone gentle. “I know.”

Iruka clears his throat, also nodding and then raises his eyebrows. “Well, I can confirm he definitely knows about chakra control now.”

Kakashi snickers, shaking his head. 

Iruka shakes his head too, wondering out loud. “If he continues flaunting it like that, they’ll send him onto all of these spying missions I bet.”

Kakashi snorts. “Oh please, Naruto? The only way he’d be able to go in via subterfuge would be as himself.” His smile gentles a bit, truth coloring his words. “I don’t think he’ll bend, for anyone.”

Iruka sobers slowly, watching him. “No, you’re probably right.” He blinks, asking carefully. “Is he… like his parents like that?”

Kakashi hesitates and then looks away, his gaze unseeing on the wall. “I… “ He smiles softly, and then looks back at Iruka for a moment. “You never asked before.”

Iruka shrugs, a bit sheepishly. “I never felt I could, somehow.”

Kakashi frowns. “And that’s different now?”

Iruka blinks at him and then smiles, gently. “Yeah.”

Kakashi shakes his head once. “Why?”

Iruka looks at him for a moment, and then leans forward, squeezes his hand, once, before withdrawing a bit again. “You know why.”

Kakashi blinks away the sudden tears, his voice rough. “I’m sorry.”

Iruka chuckles softly, surprising him. “I’m not.”

Kakashi looks up at him, sniffing quietly. “You’re not?”

Iruka shakes his head. “No. I mourn what we had, yes. But I do not regret seeing the change in you.” Iruka’s smile is wide. “Accepting this team, and… accepting your role”, he holds up his hand, forestalling any objection, “to a certain extent at least, yes, I know, has done you a hell of good.”

Kakashi pulls a bit of a doubtful face, though there is a smile somewhere in there, too. “Really.”

Iruka leans back. “Yeah, really.” He crosses his arms. “Now, Minato and Kushina. Spill.”

 

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head. And then he reaches up, pulls off his mask and Iruka beams at him, and Kakashi smiles back, wiping the track of a tear away. “Uh, alright. Where to start…”

Iruka grins at him, his nose scrunched, making the scar across it wrinkle a bit too. “How about you start making us that tea after all. I think I’ll stay here, for a while.”

Kakashi laughs softly and pushes up, and reaches for the tea on the shelf.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi wanders through Konoha, hands in his pocket, his thoughts … floating. Talking with Iruka had been… intense and yet light, a levity to their interaction that had been missing ever since they had broken up and Kakashi smiles softly, remembering how Iruka had snored on his couch, loudly, after having fallen asleep on it sometime during Kakashi’s stories. 

It had been good to talk about them.

About them all.

 

It had been good to just sit with Iruka there, in the semi dark, talking. 

It had been good to watch him sleep.

 

The pull to touch had been there, but it had been… sedate somehow. 

Something remembered.

Something good.

 

It had been nice.

 

Iruka had been grumpy in the morning, but he had accepted the coffee with a smile. 

And he had left asking if they could to that again, sometime. Talk.

Kakashi had nodded and had hugged him, carefully. 

Had withdrawn, and stepped back.

 

They had smiled at each other before parting ways.

 

It had been good. 

 

 

Konoha feels particularly beautiful today.

He inhales deeply, catching the scent of rice cakes. Guy and Asuma and Kurenai are waving at him from the shop across the street but he only waves back, feeling too… light to talk, right now. Too floating. But I need to join them at some point. Maybe tomorrow. 

 

He starts as he makes out yelling ahead, some preschoolers running after an… orange… something. He quirks a smile, sedately following the yelling. 

 

They had gotten a whole week off after their return, and of course Naruto was bound to get bored within a few days. Kakashi narrows his eyes, trying to see who he is actually following. But that boy after him is… He catches an impression of a long, blue scarf, and big goggles. Kakashi smirks a bit meanly. Our dear Hokage’s grandchild. He wonders if Sarutobi Hiruzen is pleased or annoyed at the boys building a friendship.

 

Another yell, closer now, and he peeks around the corner, watching the tumult down the street. 

There’s a sexy no jutsu competition happening apparently, with Naruto and Konohamaru trying to outdo themselves. And Konohamaru’s friends Udon and Muegi egging them on. Or yelling at them to stop, Kakashi isn’t too sure either way.

 

Kakashi turns back around the corner, leaning against the wall, chuckling helplessly. The book in the pocket is pressing into his lower back, and he tilts his head for a moment, wishing for Jiraiya to be there, to see this. This would be right up your alley, eh? He looks back around the corner, Muegi now scolding the boys harshly, while Naruto yells back, irately. Righteously. Still in henge.

Kakashi withdraws again, snickering to himself, his shoulders shaking.

 

A dark voice makes him look up, coming with a signature smell of tobacco. “Having fun?”

Kakashi looks up at Asuma, inhaling deeply as the big jonin leans in, as always just a tad to close. Once upon a time Kakashi thought that maybe Asuma had been interested, but he had been with Iruka then and now… now Asuma is dating Kurenai. If the rumors are to be trusted. Still. There’s something about his proximity that feels… nice. It’s nice to be wanted, hmm. He smirks a bit wryly to himself, while shrugging and tilting his head towards the corner. “They’re at it again.”

Asuma groans, and then puffs on his cigarette, with a chuckle. “Oh man, I don’t believe it.”

He chances a look around the corner, almost pressing into Kakashi in the process. His voice rumbles as he speaks. “I see they’ve both gotten even better.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow as Asuma leans back, keeps his voice low. “Yeah, Iruka has been by blaming me for it.”

Asuma laughs, loudly, and Kakashi chimes in, chuckling gently for a moment before shushing him again. Asuma quiets down again, checking to see that they’re still undiscovered. He looks at Kakashi from the corner of his eyes and Kakashi sobers, inhaling deeply, his voice a bit gruff. “What.”

Asuma takes a deep drag. “I heard some rumors.”

Kakashi tilts his head. “So have I.”

Asuma grins at him. “You first.”

Kakashi sighs, and shrugs. “You and Kurenai?”

Asuma hums, puffing on his cigarette. “True, that.” 

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Really… I bet the Sandaime isn’t too pleased about that.”

Asuma scoffs. “Yeah, well, he can just…” He trails off, flipping the ash of the cigarette, before grinning again. “Now, you.” He leans in, his eyes sparkling. “Rumor has it that you are spoken for and that this is the reason you and Iruka broke up.”

Kakashi swallows, looking away for a moment. Interesting way to put it. “The rumors are very well informed then.”

Asuma hums, watching him intently. “Is it really Naruto?”

Kakashi grimaces, closing his eyes for a long moment. 

Asuma whistles. “Holy shit.” He chuckles breathlessly. “My condolences.”

Kakashi shoots him a withering look. 

Asuma shrugs and then his tone gentles, though his words are cutting. “How can you stand it?”

Kakashi laughs, darkly, while he tries to keep his emotions in check. Yeah, that is the question, isn’t it. He grins, fiercely, savagely. “No choice?”

Asuma nods, once, finishing his cigarette and tilting his face up to blow the smoke into the sky. They are silent for a moment, suddenly aware that there is no yelling around the corner anymore, the children obviously having left. 

 

Kakashi pushes himself off the wall, starting to walk down the street and Asuma falls into step next to him, easily, companionable. 

Asuma sighs at some point, his voice sounding faraway. “It’s funny, isn’t it, that Konohamaru chooses the village’s jinchuriki as his role model.” He looks over at Kakashi. “Not my father, not me… him.” 

Kakashi is silent, watching the people and clouds drift by. 

Asuma sighs softly. “When I was younger, my father would sometimes threaten to bind one promise or another with a seal… I hear they taste like chocolate.” 

Kakashi’s voice is gravelly. “They do.”

Asuma hums. “I left for the Twelve Guardians not only because I wanted honor. You know that.” 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment. “I know.” 

Asuma nods, pulling out a pack of cigarettes and lighting one. “These things… they shape us. I cannot tell you, of course, but rest assured I have enough reasons not to care too much for my father’s opinion. Nor his opinion regarding my soul-mate.”

Kakashi quirks his eyebrow, his tone quiet. “Congratulations.”

Asuma nods, clasping his shoulder for a moment before taking another drag. “Thank you, Kakashi. Kurenai was… scared to be wrong that’s why we waited for a while. She only had the tattoo done a little while back. But…” He grins softly, his whole face changing with the emotion. “Now we know.”

Kakashi blinks, sniffing once. “I’m happy for you.”

Asuma is silent for a long moment, puffing silently. When he speaks, his voice is suffused with humor. “Try to look at it that way, Kakashi. At least you know your soul-mate will be a looker when he’s all grown up, with those parents.”

Kakashi turns his head, stares at him, and he knows it is a bit wildly. 

Asuma chuckles, raising his hands. “Sorry, sorry.” He grins, but waggles his eyebrows. “You know I’m right though?”

Kakashi groans, hiding his face behind his hands.

Asuma leans into him, his breath tickling Kakashi’s ear. “Remember, Kakashi, I’m a few years older than you. I saw how you looked at the Yondaime.”

Kakashi groans again, loudly, shaking his head behind his hands. 

Asuma laughs, roaringly, hitting his back none too gently. “Go home, Kakashi. Or come and have a drink with me.”

Kakashi grunts behind his hands, shaking his head. He sounds defeated but also feels strangely relieved, knowing Asuma… understands, too. “Drinks sound good.” Much better than going home alone. 

Asuma chuckles and steers him through the streets, a hand on Kakashi’s shoulder lending strength. And confidence, somehow. 

 

No. Kakashi smirks gently, relaxing a bit. 

 

Anticipation.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi drags himself to open the door, after the fourth knock. His head is pounding, and there is a bad taste in his mouth. He’s also feeling slightly sick and foregoes scanning the chakra, anticipating it to be Iruka.

He opens the door with a bit of an ill-tempered flourish… and stares at the opposite wall, belatedly lowering his gaze to look at the little blonde boy, half hidden behind a big, green plant. “Naruto? What…”

The plant is shoved up, into his face. “Sensei, I brought you Mr. Ukki!”

Kakashi blinks, pulling back a bit, to get the leaves out of his face. “Ahhh, hello Naruto. Who is Mr. Ukki?”

Naruto groans at him, heavily emphasizing the title. “Well, the plant of course, Sensei.”

Kakashi grunts, trying to concentrate. “I’m sorry, Naruto. I had a…” He trails off, trying to remember the previous afternoon... night. Kurenai and Guy had been there, too, later. It had become late. Very late.

He clears his throat. “I had a long day yesterday.” He frowns down at the plant. “Is that for me?”

The unruly blonde hair is flung back and forth. “Uh huh. You said it’s good that I surround myself with living things.” The plant is shoved up again, and at Kakashi. “It must be good for you then, too.” 

Kakashi chuckles, pinching the bridge of his nose with one hand, while reaching to grab the plant with his other. “I see.”

Naruto steps back, beaming up at him. “Do you like it?”

Kakashi inhales deeply, touching the leaves with his lowered hand, the full force of Naruto’s personality burning up to him, his hangover not standing the slightest chance. His throat is dry. “Yeah. Thank you, Naruto.”

Naruto’s smile broadens, rocking back and forth on his heels. “You have to water it once a week.”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows. “Uh huh. Alright, thank you.”

Naruto stares at him, still rocking back and forth.

Kakashi sighs, deeply, but something in him… warms up. “Want to come in for a moment?”

Naruto throws his arms into the air. “I thought you’d never ask, Sensei!”

Kakashi chuckles, willing his upset stomach down. “Come on in then, Naruto.”

Naruto squeezes in while he is speaking still, kicking off his shoes. “Oh, I like your apartment. It’s as big as mine.”

Kakashi snorts, closing the door behind them. “You mean, as small.”

Naruto waves him off, turning on his heel in the middle of his small living room. “It’s so clean though.”

Kakashi chuckles, unable not to. “Yeah, yours would be, too, if you would clean once in a while?”

Naruto pulls a face at him and then flops down on the couch, watching as Kakashi puts Mr. Ukki up on the desk in the corner. “No, no, Sensei, you have to put him directly next to the window.”

Kakashi pauses, looking back at him. “It doesn’t have a sill though.”

Naruto blinks, snapping his fingers. “Put it onto your headboard then, on your bed?”

Kakashi stares at him, mumbling ‘lucky guess’ under his breath. He carries the plant into his bedroom, turning and starting when Naruto is there, right behind him. “Mah, mah, you’ve become quite sneaky when you want to?”

Naruto grins at him. “I’ve been practicing.”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, gently shoving Naruto out of his bedroom. Refusing to actually dwell on it. “And who, pray tell, has been teaching you to mask your chakra and to sneak up on people?”

Naruto tilts his head back, looks up to him, upside down. “Well, Konohamaru, of course.”

Kakashi grunts, seriously doubting the young boy has the skills yet. “And?”

Naruto ducks his head a bit, shuffling his feet. “I asked Shikamaru.”

“Mhhh hmmm.” Kakashi lowers himself carefully into his armchair, watching as Naruto lets himself fall back onto the couch. “You’re friends with Nara Shikamaru?”

Naruto shrugs, looking around with a bit of a pout. “Not really. He’s ok I guess.”

Kakashi tilts his head. “But you’re comfortable asking him for help.”

Naruto looks at him. “He’s always been nice to me. Not like some of the others.” He snickers. “But he was so annoyed when I asked him.”

Kakashi chuckles with him, feeling relieved that this particular detail of his hunch way back then paid off after all. “I think that is just part of his make-up, don’t worry about it too much.”

 

Naruto grins, and then sniffs the air. “He always smells a bit like you do today, too.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow and then laughs, a bit embarrassedly. “Ahhh, I guess that is his Sensei, Sarutobi Asuma. We… went out yesterday.” And I didn’t shower yet. He smirks softly, the pain not as bad as anticipated. Iruka would have thrown me out of the bed.

Naruto blinks at him, the big blue eyes weirdly watchful. “You went out with the Sandaime’s son?” The watchfulness vanishes, and leaves something sparkling behind. “Like, in a date?”

“Uhhhhhh…” Kakashi blinks, and then shakes his head, holding up his hand. “No, not like that.” He snorts, shaking his head. “We met up with other friends and just had some fun.”

“Oh ok.” Naruto’s little feet swing back and forth, lightly knocking against the couch. 

Kakashi suddenly remembers he wanted to rap his knuckles over Naruto’s head for doing exactly that during his recovery period. It seems so long ago already. He tilts his head, frowning a bit. “Would you mind?”

Naruto frowns at him. “Mind?”

Kakashi grimaces a bit behind his mask, not sure how to phrase it. “If I… “

Naruto grins. “If you had a boyfriend? No, of course not, Sensei.”

Kakashi looks away for a moment, clearing his throat. No, of course not. Why would he. He’s fucking twelve. And… totally untouched by this whole mess his… father shoved him into. He sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose again. “I, errr, that’s good I guess. Still, it wasn’t like that.”

“Ok.” Naruto beams at him, feet still thumping against the couch. 

Kakashi stares at him, for a long moment. “Naruto, why are you here?”

Naruto blinks, and then looks away, a blush creeping up his cheeks. “I…” He trails off. 

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, prompting. “Yes?”

Naruto shrugs, looking down between his feet. “I… was lonely. And I like being close to you.” He looks up, just quickly, before looking away again, and something in Kakashi’s stomach flutters. “I guess I wanted to see you.”

 

Kakashi swallows, looking away for a long moment, suddenly longing to be able to put up the Anbu mask and to spend time with the boy, to teach him like that. How weird to be missing that time. He decides to change the subject, picking the first thought that comes to mind. “Did you give Konohamaru those goggles?”

Naruto grins at him. “Yeah, well, no, but he saw the ones I have in my apartment, and he just had to get some for himself, dattebayou. And the others followed suit.”

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head. And so the wheels turn, Obito. One generation after the other aiming to be Hokage while wearing goggles. 

Naruto interrupts his thoughts, hopping off the couch. “I’m gonna go and train some more, Sensei. Konohamaru said there’d be a tournament soon.”

Kakashi frowns, looking at him. “Oh? What exactly did he say?”

Naruto pulls a face, concentrating. “He said that the Sandaime had been planning something with the other villages. And that he’s being thrown out of the office even more often right now.”

Kakashi blinks, a sizzling excitement settling in his gut. “I see.”

Naruto looks up at him. “What kind of tournament, Sensei?”

Kakashi stares at him, for a long moment. Can I… enter him in the chunin exams already? Can I enter them? Do I want to enter them? It’s a dangerous tournament, still, even though we are technically at peace. He pushes up, slowly, reaching out to ruffle Naruto’s hair. “Go and train, Naruto. You’ll see soon enough.”

Naruto rolls his eyes but throws his arms around Kakashi’s waist for a moment, squeezing. “Thank you, Sensei.”

Kakashi smiles behind his mask, and watches him go, his mind churning. When the time comes… can I actually knowingly, willingly send him into danger? To a possible death? The tattoo on his upper arm burns for a moment, and he knocks his forehead on the door frame, shaking his head. 

 

Dammit.

 

Why now, Sandaime-sama? Why?

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He is called to the Hokage tower, in the afternoon.

There’s another powerful presence there, and Kakashi is vaguely disappointed to not recognize it right away, a part of him yearning for the flamboyant and frivolous easy companionship Jiraiya offers. 

He knocks on the door, waits until it is opened, recognizing the gray-haired woman from tales and memory after all. Senju Sora. Kushina’s Sensei. He frowns, kneeling down, head bowed.

The Sandaime interrupts any further thoughts. “Kakashi-san, thank you for coming.” He doesn’t wait for a response, turning to Sora again, nodding at her. “Sora-san has returned to attend the chunin exams preparations.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. So Konohamaru and Naruto had been right. Out loud he says: “I see. Welcome back, Sora-san.”

The petite woman wearing a creme colored civilian outfit turns to him, her hazel eyes burning into his for a moment. “Thank you, Hatake Kakashi. I see you have grown up quite well.”

Kakashi inclines his head, not answering. 

Sora turns back to the Sandaime. “Speaking of growing up… Is Kushina’s son still under your tutelage?”

A shiver runs down Kakashi’s spine and he raises his uncovered eye to watch the Sandaime. For a moment Sarutobi Hiruzen looks at him directly. “Yes and… no.”

Sora shoots a look at Kakashi and then back at the Hokage. “Yes and no? How come you do not know?”

Kakashi blinks, watching the Hokage squirm a bit. Huh. That’s interesting. He’s heard of the formidable ninja of course, the famed genjutsu and burning shuriken user, niece to Senju Hashirama and cousin of Senju Tsunade. He’s met her, even, back then, when he was still a child, just as she was leaving, saying her good-byes to her pupil Kushina when Minato had become his Sensei. He tries to remember why she left, frowning when he realizes that she must have left at the same time Jiraiya did. The same time Tsunade did, too. Three of the most formidable ninjas leaving during your rule, Hokage-sama. Why? 

Her words draw him back now, the delivery hard. Harsh. “Did you not take him under your care, as requested?”

Kakashi feels sick suddenly, short of breath, his mind sluggish. As… requested?

The Hokage glowers at her, obviously trying to stay calm. “I had my reasons for treating him the way I did. I have made sure he is well protected though.” He nods towards Kakashi, but keeps his eyes on Sora. Obviously trying to deflect. “Hatake Kakashi is the boy’s soul-mate.”

There is a pause as Kakashi tries not to gnash his teeth too hard, his stomach in turmoil, and as Sora obviously goes through the implications. Her tone is dry. “I… see.” She tilts her head, her eyes cold despite their warm color. “And you thought it… prudent not to take him in then, do I understand that correctly.”

The Hokage’s eyes burn. “I thought it prudent to not anger the council further, yes. I am sure I do not need to tell you of the… difficulties back then.”

There is a moment where Sora only stares back at him, holding his gaze.

And then she breaks it, her tone softening the tiniest bit as she addresses Kakashi. “I am glad at least some of Minato’s wishes are honored around here, Kakashi-san.”

Kakashi swallows, hearing the Hokage scoff, quietly. He clears his throat. “Minato’s… wishes?”

Sora smirks at him, for a moment. “He chose you to guard his wife and son, did he not?”

Kakashi’s eyes flit to the Hokage, remembering quite well that the Hokage had told Kakashi that he had suggested Kakashi guard Kushina back then, but the Hokage stays silent. Kakashi shrugs, minutely. “I… guess.”

Sora gazes at him, for a long moment. “Kushina used to say that Minato always had his sound reasons, for anything.” She turns back to Hiruzen. “His wishes were quite succinctly phrased in his will I believe. So were Kushina’s.”

The Hokage sighs, deeply, shaking his head once. “Wishes made before the situation changed. I’m sure you know.”

Sora smiles at him, definitely not in a friendly manner. “I see nothing changed much, though.” She looks away for a moment, not waiting for an answer. Her tone makes clear she doesn’t really ask. “I will stay for a few weeks, if that is alright with you, Hokage-sama.”

Sarutobi Hiruzen frowns, but inclines his head, silently. 

Sora pushes up, looking over at Kakashi for a moment. “I’m sorry. We digressed… We had called on you for you to show me your… pupil’s progress.” She tilts her head. “I am interested to see his, no, actually all of their and the other teams’ abilities.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, rising as well when the Sandaime nods at him. “Let me take you to them, then. I believe they are at training ground 4.”

Sora nods at him. “Let’s go then.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“So that is last Uchiha?”

Kakashi nods, watching his genins train from the shadows of the trees with Sora. “I feel his reputation precedes him?”

Sora hums. “Apart from Uchiha Itachi he is the last living Uchiha. And Itachi is living on borrowed time, with the prize that is on his head in the bingo book.”

Kakashi frowns. “Don’t we all live on borrowed time though? And there are a lot of prizes in various bingo books.”

Sora looks at him, and grins, the graying hair making her eyes glow. “Indeed. Yours is quite high as well.”

Kakashi grunts, unwilling to really comment on that. 

She sighs, tapping her foot, watching Naruto and Sasuke spar doggedly while Sakura is judging them. And trying to ease the heavy rivalry that Sasuke and Naruto are displaying. “I wonder if I am still in them… I used to be.” She shoots a look at Kakashi. “But living off the grid has proven to make a lot of people forget about you.” She smirks. “Which is good for a surprise visit or attack, but not so good in regards to… influence.”

Kakashi looks at her, silently. 

She sighs, shaking her head at him. “You really are the silent and mysterious type, huh?”

Kakashi blushes, looking away. “I wouldn’t know.”

She snorts. “That’s what Jiraiya said about you, by the way.”

Kakashi snorts as well, shaking his head once. “Uh huh.” He inhales deeply, looking into her eyes. “Do you meet up often?”

Sora shrugs. “Sometimes. He is much better at staying in the people’s memory by creating his own reputation as I’m sure you know.”

Kakashi hums. “Is he going to come back soon?”

Sora smirks at him. “Miss him?”

Kakashi stares at her, a bit wildly, willing his ears to stop burning. “I…”

Sora snickers, clapping his back once. “Sorry, I’m just teasing. But, you know, Jiraiya does like you and Minato and Kushina liked you, so I cannot help but like you, too.” She shrugs, with a small chuckle. 

Kakashi blinks, willing the sudden bout of emotion down. “I… thank you.”

Sora smirks, keeping her eyes on his now yelling pupils. “He’s really set on orange, isn’t he.”

Kakashi nods, clicking his tongue. “He is. And he has Kushina’s stubbornness.”

Sora sighs softly. “And her and his father’s handsomeness.” She elbows him into the side. “You’re lucky.”

Kakashi groans, pinching the bridge of his nose and Sora looks at him inquiringly. He shrugs. “You’re the second person in as many days to tell me that.”

Sora hums, weighing her head. “A match like that comes with a lot of problems, and negativity attached to it, but… I mean, you also have this once in a lifetime chance to… really connect your souls?” She quirks her eyebrows at him and he stares at her, trying to understand. 

 

She pulls a face, leaning in. “I mean, Kakashi, you not only know your future match, but you can take your time coming to love him? His mind, his personality and his soul? Often the soul-mates-bond snaps into place, and it’s a tumble through destiny, and it’s blissful, yes, but there’s also… how do I put it…” She spreads her arms, continuing after a moment. “There’s awareness missing.” She points her finger. “You on the other hand…” She grins. "For you it will be like 'koi no yokan‘, 'love at second sight‘…, you can let yourself love him first, and let that shape your relationship before anything else happens?”

 

He stares at her, silently, for so long she starts waving her hand in front of his face, his mind stuck. I can… love him first. He swallows harshly, blinking away sudden tears, tears of relief, of acknowledgement, and then catches her hand, gently. “Thank you, I… will think about it, Sora-san.”

She nods at him and then returns her gaze to his team, the boys still rolling around in the dust. “Who is the girl?”

“Haruna Sakura. Very clever.” Kakashi watches as Sakura balances on one of the wooden poles, easily, in order to get out of the way of the boys. “She has very good chakra control.”

Sora looks up at him. “Have you taught her genjutsu yet?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No, not yet. Our last missions was… longer than expected. And the other two are talented in a very different way so teaching them together is probably not the best course of action.”

Sora quirks an eyebrow. “I could train her with you before the chunin exams start?”

Kakashi looks at her, feeling vaguely surprised. “You want to train her?” 

She shrugs, grinning a bit. “Sure. If she’s as talented as you said?”

Kakashi tilts his head, looking at his genins for a moment. “Alright. Let’s meet at training ground 2 tomorrow morning? You‘ll have enough time to visit with the other team leaders until then?”

Sora crosses her arms. “Deal.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Sakura is quivering with excitement when he picks her up the next morning, on time for once. 

He has sent Naruto and Sasuke off to practice with their kunais and shuriken already, “In parallel, side by side, I do not want any kind of injuries between the two of you, understood?”, and has looked at Naruto’s pinched little smile without a bad conscience, for once. 

 

Maybe… she’s right? He just doesn’t know how to feel about it all anymore. It’s all a mess. 

But he also cannot deny that her words make sense to him, and that they… tempt. Tempt him to allow himself to actually feel the connection to Naruto. Badly.

 

His attention is diverted as Sakura tugs on his sleeve. “Sensei?”

He looks down at her, dismissing his thoughts, with an effort. “Yes?”

Sakura’s big green eyes blink up at him. “Why… do you only want me to train with you today?”

Kakashi gives her an eye-smile. “For the same reason we trained on the waves a while ago. You are extremely talented for this kind of thing. And not just today, but actually for the next week at least.”

“Oh.” She looks away, gnawing on her lips.

He exhales softly. “We are going to have help from a very powerful ninja today, who was Sensei to one of my… teachers.” He swallows harshly around the word. “She is well versed in what we’re trying to teach you.”

Sora drops down from a tree right in front of them, smiling down at Sakura. “That I am.” She inclines her head. “Senju Sora, it is very nice to meet you.”

Sakura bows down, hands clasped. “Sora-sama, so nice to meet you.”

“Sora.” The small woman smiles, and Kakashi realizes she is only like half a head taller than Sakura. “I hear you are very talented in chakra control.”

Sakura blushes and shrugs. 

Sora tilts her head and then puts her arm around Sakura’s shoulders, gently pulling her along. “What do you know about genjutsu.”

Kakashi grins to himself and follows them, watching Sakura thaw to the older woman almost immediately and then inhaling everything she says. He snorts gently to himself, wondering if what Sora drew to Sakura in addition to intelligence might be memories of a somewhat close hair color.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Release.”

Sora’s voice is firm, and Kakashi’s senses are swimming. “Very good. Again.”

Another jolt of energy and the fog clears from Kakashi’s mind.

Sora smirks at Sakura. “Very good!”

Kakashi exhales, rubbing his neck. “Looks like you managed to successfully trap me this time.”

Sakura beams at him, and then up at Sora, who nods at her, with a smile. “You did.” She quirks an eyebrow, leaning in a bit conspiratorially. “Of course your Sensei actually allowed himself to get trapped right now… in order to trap anyone against their will you will have to practice a lot more.”

 

Kakashi raises his chin, drily adding while kneading his locked neck muscles. “But considering I do not remember how long I must have been under your illusion, you are indeed very talented.”

Sora chuckles, looking up at him slyly but addressing Sakura. “Don’t tell the Sandaime though.”

Sakura frowns and Kakashi grimaces, hastily interjecting. “Let’s just concentrate on honing the basic skills for now, alright? And then we can… boast later.”

Sora quirks an eyebrow and Kakashi shoots her a withering look for a moment. He clicks his tongue, returning his attention to Sakura. “Why don’t you try again. I’ll resist a bit more this time. And do try to release in one jolt of focused chakra, the sensation if the subject is caught midway is vaguely unpleasant.”

Sakura blushes and then concentrates, closing her eyes and Kakashi exhales, to Sora rolling her eyes.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“Why did you stomp on me criticizing the Sandaime?”

Kakashi sighs, heavily, wandering through Konoha with Sora after having carried an utterly exhausted Sakura home. 

He shoots her a look, lowering his voice. “And what good would it do, if I told her that the current Hokage despises genjutsu users for… personal reasons, and that he wouldn’t like us training her?” He shrugs, returning his gaze to the street and the sky. “Her self esteem is already lower than that of the boys on her team because we have a distinct lack of female teachers. There’s Anko, who is having her own problems thanks to the Sandaime’s pupil, and there is Kurenai, who is not exactly high in his esteem because he doesn’t like her heritage for his son and her specialty, and then there’s…” He spreads his arms. “No-one else. And Sakura’s from a civilian background, and she feels that every day, too.”

Sora frowns, her still pretty face pulled into a grimace. “She needs a role model.”

 

Kakashi nods, and shrugs. “Yes.” He shoots her a look. “Looking for a job?”

Sora laughs, loudly, while quirking an eyebrow. “No, I’m sorry. Been there, done that.” Her smile shatters, as if in slow motion. “And they’re all dead.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, allowing the pain to flow through him, just as he knows it is flowing through her. 

 

His voice is very soft. “How was she? I mean, when she was younger?”

Sora inhales deeply, the sun casting her features into stark contrast. There is a ghost of a smile on her lips when she speaks though, full of warmth. “Willful, strong-headed and stubborn. Deeply emotional and loyal. She and Minato found each other so early, it was a wonder they were able to be in different teams.” She shoots him a look. “I often went onto joined missions with Jiraiya’s team in order to prevent problems, but those problems never manifested. I think because they simply trusted in each other.” She grins suddenly, looking up at Kakashi. “She hated downtimes though, always wanting to do something.”

 

Kakashi chuckles, remembering Kushina’s pregnancy vividly. The way Kushina kept sparring and training almost till the end. “Yeah, I remember.” He swallows. “Guess Naruto has that from her.” Trust, huh? Can it be that easy? And… that difficult?

Sora snickers. “Yes, she drove me insane at times.” She sobers a bit. “It was Jiraiya’s idea to have her and Minato start working on seals and spells together, combining the special jutsus of their respective clans.”

Kakashi hums, nodding to himself. “What about the chains?” Sora looks up at him, frowning, and Kakashi shrugs. “I mean the adamantine chains of the Uzumaki clan. Kushina was set to take the bijou from Mito-sama rather early, she must have practiced this jutsu at some point?”

Sora quirks an eyebrow, lowering her voice even more. “You are thinking about checking whether Naruto can employ the chains?”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows. “Well, that would be… helpful, wouldn’t it?”

 

Sora weighs her head. “Maybe. But those chains only bind the bijou if it’s outside already. So far, only full Uzumaki clan members have been able to withstand the removal of a bijou. That is why they were chosen as jinchurikis after all.” She looks up at him. “But… you must be aware why you, as the famed assassination Anbu that you were… have been appointed as his… guardian. His Sensei.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, his voice almost inaudible. “Yes. The Sandaime made that decision… like using a double-edged sword.” 

Sora gazes at him, silent.

He shakes his head once, forcing himself to continue. “I’ve… always been aware of that reason I think. But Minato’s… little trick added a component to it that…”

Sora smiles sharply, finishing his sentence. “Blunted the Sandaime’s sword.”

Kakashi exhales a shuddering breath, stopping in the middle of the street, his feet unwilling to carry him any further. “Jiraiya-sama told me that Sensei Minato hid a temporal component in my and Naruto’s tattoo. That the ink engaged in addition to that… lock.”

Sora nods, once, continuing once more. “And he knew that the lock alone, and your status as guardian to his and Kushina’s child would make sure the Sandaime’s chosen… killer would not actually be able to kill his child. Because they knew you. Your time with them shaped you.”

Kakashi stares at her, a sinking feeling in his stomach.

 

Sora leans in even more, her gaze burning. “And then fate came through, on top of it all, making you the worst possible candidate to kill the boy, ordered or not.”

Kakashi’s voice is a whisper, speaking the words he has known the truth of for long years, feeling light-headed. “The Sandaime… suggesting me to be guarding Kushina actually destroyed his carefully built plan to have their child...” He trails off. What. Assassinated? He feels sick.

Sora quirks an eyebrow. “No, not their child. The jinchuriki.”

He breathes the words. “That would have been treason.” Is that… why he was so reluctant to rescue Tenzou from the Ne? Because he didn’t actually want a means to control the nine-tails after all? And now, with the Uchiha gone… that is why Sasuke is on his team, isn’t it. And why I’m supposed to help him with his eye.

He feels sick.

Sora looks at him, her eyes dark. “If it had happened while the bijou was under control? Yes.” She leans in, smiling broadly, and something about the smile reminds him of Jiraiya. “But not if the bijou had been on a rampage, right?” She sighs, heavily. “And now you know why he doesn’t like me.” She turns, throwing the words back over her shoulder. “Because I told him.”

Kakashi wheezes. “You… told him?”

She stops, grinning back at him. “Oh yes. And he knows that if he’d come for me…” She points to her head, and her voice drops, something black in it. “I’d show them the truth. All of them.”

 

Kakashi blinks, and then hurries after her, shaking his head. “So, what now? What do we…”

Sora interrupts, shaking her head. “Do? Nothing, Kakashi.” She shoots him a sharp look. “The powers that be have chosen the Sandaime as their Hokage. And that’s it. But…”

He stares at her, prompting. “But?”

She shrugs, looking up at the Hokage heads on the mountain. “Nothing but… It’s just… traitors will always be betrayed by those they betrayed.” She smirks grimly, looking up at him for a moment. “Always. Fate is funny that way.” She averts her gaze again, continuing down the street. “And then they die.”

 

Kakashi follows her, as if in a stupor, a block of ice in his stomach.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He is called to the tower again a few days later, nodding at Asuma and Kurenai who are already there.  Sora is sitting off to the side, listening quietly. As is Iruka.

He looks at her while he listens to the Sandaime with half a mind, and then enters his team for the chunin exams when she nods, just slightly. 

 

The weight of Asuma’s and Kurenai’s gazes is heavy, but Kakashi feels light suddenly, knowing he’s made the right decision.

Though he cannot pass on the opportunity to nettle Guy just a bit. 

 

Yes, they really are full of surprises. 

And fearless. 

 

 

And Naruto telling him he ‘loves him’ when he tells his cute little genins he’s entered them doesn’t exactly hurt either. Or that he’s clinging to Kakashi’s neck while doing so.

 

Though he’s telling Naruto to knock it off…

 

Of course.

 

 

 

 

But then, they cannot see the smile beneath his mask, can they.

 

 

 

 

Notes:

Changed the scene right there at the tower a bit with Iruka, bc given their history I felt that Iruka would want to have a more… private word with Kakashi. :)

And I read about the phrase "koi no yokan" aka "love at second sight“ and I thought it fit surprisingly well.
And it’s beautiful?!

Chapter 12: Trust, beyond all reason

Notes:

Chunin exams and the attack on Konoha upcoming. Since this is from Kakashi’s POV it’ll obviously follow his side of the story. The exams themselves are only a small part though, threaded through, because - especially for Kakashi - there is so much going on around and between…. :)

 

And: a small change re Madara’s... status bc I needed the hook (later) 😅😋

Chapter Text




“Kakashi!”

Kakashi grimaces, easily recognizing the ire in Iruka’s voice. He halts and turns, trying for an eye-smile. “Yes?”

Iruka glowers at him. “What the hell was that, earlier? How can you possibly think that some D-rank missions and that one slightly bigger one you went on could in any way prepare them for a potentially deadly tournament?” He is stepping in front of Kakashi, eyes burning, pointing his finger. His voice drops to a hiss. “Especially you? How…” Iruka pulls a face. “How could you.”

Kakashi sighs through his nose, tries not to be pissed. Of course Iruka would be far from pleased. And probably rightfully so. He tries to keep his voice calm. “I assure you, they are ready.”

Iruka leans in, hissing again. “They are so not. They are not even half a year out of the academy, and their experience is woefully low.”


Kakashi nods, shifting to his other foot. Lowers his voice, knowing Iruka will listen despite his emotional uproar. “Their actual count of mission is, yes. But…” He shakes his head, deliberately using the endearment. “Their actual experience is not, Iru-kun. They went and fought against the demon of Kirigakure and they won.” He shakes his head again, willing Iruka to understand. “I know you cannot know their progress but they are ready. All of them.” They all have had a taste of winning. Acquired a taste for the fight. He shrugs.

Iruka pulls a face at him. “You’re nuts to enter them.”

Kakashi blinks, his tone growing the tiniest bit colder. “Listen, Iruka. They are not your students anymore, they are mine. And I enter them.” I trust them.

Iruka withdraws slowly, with a little laugh, that sounds utterly fake. “Ah. Alright then.” He steps back, his shoulders hunched and Kakashi grimaces, wanting to reach out.

He watches as Iruka leaves instead, keeping his hands tightly clenched in his pockets.





*******




“Sensei?”

“Mhhh?” Kakashi turns to Naruto, who is running up to him, but looks at him over the edge of Icha Icha Paradise, unwilling to put the book away at this scene. The scene where the hero finally gets a kiss as reward, finally gets a promise of… He sighs, closing the book with a finger between the pages when he actually sees Naruto’s excited little face, and the big, expectant eyes. 

The face is flushed, making the whiskers glow, and the blonde hair is matted with sweat. There’s dirt on Naruto’s clothes. He frowns, nodding at the boy. “What is it, Naruto?”


Naruto skids to a halt in front of him, looking up at him, and Kakashi absentmindedly notes that he is finally growing into the orange outfit properly, the thing still baggy due to heavy use, but… fitting. Finally. Another growth spurt incoming, too, I think, and soon. He smiles softly to himself, refocusing on Naruto when he begins to speak. 

“Sensei, I was attacked earlier by some masked ninja, but I defeated him with my Kage Bunshin, and they’ve run and vanished. I tried to track him but lost the trail. But the guards say that the barrier was undisturbed.”

Kakashi blinks, and then frowns, something in him twisting at the thought that someone dared to attack Naruto in the village. Followed by a deep relief to see Naruto here, now. “I see.” He hesitates. “Thank you for telling me, Naruto.” He tilts his head. “Were the others attacked as well?” 

Naruto shrugs. “Sakura as well, yes, Sasuke I do not know.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, vaguely unsettled. “Not checking up on him?” 

Naruto pulls a face, with a pout. “He would just ignore me.”


Kakashi sighs, shaking his head, silently cursing the rivalry the boys have fallen into after the Land of Waves mission. It’s worse than what Obito and I had back then, right? At least… I hope so. The back of his neck tingles, and a familiar chakra… tickles his senses. He closes his eyes and snorts, quietly, shaking his head once, relaxing a bit again. “Alright, thank you Naruto, I’ll look into it.” He nods towards the general direction of Naruto’s apartment. “Why don’t you go clean up for now.”

Naruto hesitates and Kakashi shoos him, and he rolls his eyes and runs off, with a wave back and Kakashi chuckles, watching him go. 

Feeling warm. 


He inhales deeply, once, before addressing the shadow in the tree above. “Was that really necessary?”

Iruka drops down, silently, with an expression that Kakashi knows is supposed to be stern, but that he knows also carries humor and he cannot help himself, he just sees it as cute. 

Iruka shrugs. “I had to know.”

Kakashi tilts his head. “So, did they pass?”

Iruka sighs, deeply. “Yesss….” He rolls his eyes. “You were right, I was wrong, are you happy now…”

Kakashi chuckles softly. “Very.”


Iruka shoots him a withering look and Kakashi sobers slowly, gazing at him for a moment, before asking. “Why did you change your mind?”

Iruka is silent for a moment, and then sighs again, but it is lighter somehow. “None of them even hesitated. Showed fear. They all went right into their stances, defended if necessary, attacked when they were threatened.” He sighs again, ending in a groan. “They really are ninjas now, aren’t they.”

Kakashi swallows, feeling the weight of the assessment. “Yeah.”

Iruka tilts his head, looks at him from the corner of his eyes. “I’m curious… How can you stand sending him into danger though?”


Kakashi swallows, the muscles in his jaw jumping, and he knows it is visible even through his mask, if the little frown appearing on Iruka’s face is anything to go by. “I…” He chuckles suddenly, shaking his head. “It’s stupid, I know, but I… know he’ll win?”

Iruka nods, and then sniffs, his tone dry. “That is stupid.”

Kakashi hums, nodding, rather self-deprecatingly. 

Iruka turns, starting to walk down the street, his voice low. “Just so you know, I’ll have your hide if you are wrong. In regards to all of them.”

Kakashi nods, and then blows out the air, slowly.


Yeah, I know.



It’s…. reassuring. 



Because if fate were to flip the big finger to Kakashi - then at least Iruka would be there.

And Kakashi knows he would be.





*******





Watching his team’s little faces light up upon seeing them is almost enough to make him doubt his decision. There’s just simply this youthful, innocent exuberance exuded, and Kakashi swallows, wondering just how much of this innocence will be stripped away by the exams.


He’s heard of the Land of Wind trio, and the one they call Gaara. The sand’s Jinchuriki. The ninja that carries the sand bijou, Ichibi. The one rumored to have an impenetrable sand shield.

He’s heard that Naruto had a run in with him, but that Gaara had only been interested in Sasuke. Thank god.


He can see the friction between the boys in the sets of their shoulders, in the slant of their mouths. 

In the hidden glances, thrown from the corners of their eyes. 

They really are like Yin and Yang. In more ways than one. 

He sighs, raising his hand, keeping his tone light. "Yo!“ He smirks softly, feeling relieved, to see them all here, now. "You qualify for the chunin selection exam!“

Sakura catches on immediately, frowning, while the boys just stare. "What do you mean, Sensei?“

He smirks softly behind his mask. "I mean, that you can only enter as a team. And you’re here, because you wanted to come and…“, hesitates for a split second, infusing the words with feeling, "I‘m very proud of you!“


Three little genins beam at him and Kakashi sighs softly to himself, wondering if and who he might have to visit in the hospital when all is said and done. 

His tattoo tingles softly and he looks at Naruto for a moment, sees the grin that spreads, and knows, just knows that his did as well. 

And that he’s taking it as nerves. 

Good, you little rascal. Do your best.  

He steps aside silently, not trusting himself to say anything else. 

Naruto throws his hand in the air as he turns towards the door: "Look out everybody, ‘cause here we come!“

Sakura grins and Sasuke’s face twists into something that is almost a smile and Kakashi watches the doors close behind them, and he stares, for long minutes. 


Reaching, with his soul. 


Hands balled in his pocket. 




Letting them… letting him go, because he trusts.


Beyond all reason.




*******





The fresh air outside the building smells vaguely like tobacco. A brand he knows, carried on the familiar smell and presence he also knows. He turns towards it, needing some of the strength coming with that smell.


He inclines his head in greeting, noting that the other jonin leaders have already left, only the two of them still here, probably because of Asuma‘s smoking habits. He’s rather glad. “Asuma. Kurenai.“

Asuma grins at him, broadly. "Kakashi! Not knowing what to do with yourself, too?“

Kurenai next to him grins, a bittersweet note to it. "Letting them go is truly hard.“ She smirks softly, leaning forward and lowering her voice. "But Hinata really looked forward to seeing Naruto again.“

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. "Oh?“

Kurenai waggles her own. "Oh yes. She‘s liked him ever since he defended her from some rowdies when they were younger. Or so she finally told me when I needled her a bit the other day. I know she used to like to play with him when they were just kids, but her family often interfered.“

Kakashi blinks, a vague snippet of a memory of Naruto telling him of a girl that’s always nice to him flitting through his brain. "I think he mentioned her, too, at some point.“


Asuma interjects, quietly but drily. "No use for her getting a tattoo though. At least not for him.“

Kakashi shoots him a withering look, but Asuma just laughs, stepping onto his cigarette to put it out. Kurenai rolls her eyes, but he shrugs. "What, you know I‘m right?“

Kurenai sighs softly. "Yes, but don’t take it so lightly. We were lucky after all.“ Asuma hums, conceding the point with a small shrug. Kurenai continues, looking up at the sky for a moment. "Hinata will have to search beyond what she expects, I think. And not knowing who, or if it’s the person you actually like…“ She trails off, and they’re all silent for a long moment, dwelling on their own experiences. 

Asuma breaks the silence once more, but his tone is soft. "As I‘ve said before I think you’re actually quite… lucky, Kakashi. You know already.“ 

Kakashi snorts, unable to help himself. "Yeah, lucky me. No proper relationship, no intimacy, for years on end… no kids in all likelihood…“ He breaks off, suddenly feeling the words, settling like a lead weight. 

I… why did I say that? I don’t even want kids?

He grimaces behind his mask, a small part of him replaying the way he felt when he thought they would adopt Naruto. But… It would be utterly impractical, too? To have kids? And even if he’s grown up… He frowns, looking away for a long moment. Still. 


Kurenai clears her throat quietly. "Sorry.“ She indicates the village with a nod. "Why don’t we go and have some tea at ‘Jinsei Iroiro‘, hmm?“

Kakashi nods silently and then falls in step next to her after a moment, Asuma closing in on her other side. 

They are quiet until they reach the busy cafe, glad when they find a booth in the back still. 

Kurenai drops onto the bench, flings an arm over the back. Kakashi settles across from her and Asuma, who pulls out another cigarette as soon as they have settled, an expression of bliss on his face when he lights it. 

The smell of him and the tobacco in the air is quite soothing somehow, relaxing, and Kakashi sees Kurenai inhale deeply next to Asuma, her shoulders lowering. He smiles softly, behind his mask. 


Kakashi signals for tea, and they wait in silence for a moment, the companionship easy. Kakashi places his cup on the bench next to him when they are served, looking at the other two jonins for a long moment, before leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, his voice carrying vague, self-deprecating amusement. "With our genins tied up in exams, we‘ve actually got time on out hands… it’s not like we can go on training missions without them.“ He snorts softly. "I miss them.“ Already.

Asuma sighs, taking a drag of his cigarette. "Don’t worry, we’ll be busy again before we know it.“

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, noting the undertone. "Yeah? Why?“

Asuma smirks. "I heard talk that this year’s examiner was no-one other than Morino Ibiki.“

Kakashi stares at him, somewhat dumbstruck, while Kurenai looks back and forth between them. 

Her voice carries her confusion. "So? What’s so special about of him.“

Asuma shrugs. "He‘s a pro‘s pro.“

Kakashi‘s tone is flat. "He‘s a sadist.“ There’ll be a twist to his test.

Kurenai frowns, looking back and forth between them. "What does that mean?“

Asuma shoots her a look. "Right, you don’t know, since you only became a jonin recently.“ He shoot’s Kakashi a look. "Ibiki is the head of the interrogation and extraction unit. His specialty is people‘s minds.“ He takes a drag. "And he destroys them.“ He looks at Kurenai, flipping the ash off his cigarette. "Kakashi… has experience with him.“


Kakashi frowns, looking away for a long moment. 

He remembers his own run in with the interrogation master, vividly. 

Ibiki‘s past had been a rough one, and he had suffered in the aftermath of losing his brother, of course. But he also developed the tendency to really enjoy extracting information - one way or another.


Kakashi had been on mission with him exactly once, two years ago.


The mission had been to a small hideout of enemy ninja, a hut somewhere in the woods.

The carefully planned surprise attack had been successful, their mission as well, because all the information they had wanted, needed, had been on the scroll they found on one of the prisoners.


It would have been… enough. 

But enough had never been good enough for Ibiki.

And then one of the prisoners had spilled the name of another, on accident, if you could call being held at the tip of a knife that, revealing him to be the son of the rivalring village‘s daimyo. 

Who had way more information than just the few tidbits that they needed, of course. 

Ibiki had been ecstatic. 

Kakashi had felt sick, correctly guessing what was to come. 

He had gone outside, to guard, knowing Ibiki would take his time. 

And Ibiki had gotten what he wanted. 

They had left the enemy ninjas as a quivering, shivering mess, their minds in a similar state. 

Without Ibiki touching them even once. 


Kakashi had issued a request to never be paired up with him again right after their return. 

Something about his voice must have stuck, because for once the Sandaime had not tried to change his mind. 

Kakashi is not naïve enough to think that Ibiki‘s retrieved information had not been important intelligence. 

No. It had been. 

It had saved lives. 


Kakashi frowns, remembering Tenzou praising his chidori back then, oblivious of the repercussions that the sharingan brought with it. Brings with it. 

And, to an extent, oblivious to his stance regarding his duties. To the way Kakashi has kept his own standards of conduct.

He wonders for a moment if Tenzou has ever asked to be released as well. 

He knows Ibiki has settled somewhat though, by now. Ibiki had never let on that he had been irritated by Kakashi’s request, on the contrary - Kakashi had always felt that Ibiki had appreciated how Kakashi’s request had raised his reputation. They’d always met on neutral to good terms, afterwards. 

Still, the fact that he is testing his sou… cute little genins does not serve to relax him. 


He sighs deeply, shaking his head once, returning to the here and now. He swallows, shooting a look at Kurenai. "Let’s just say that his… skills are quite honed.“

Asuma snorts, nodding, before reaching for his cup of tea. "Indeed.“ He takes a sip, before frowning. "By the way and a propos honing. I heard you were training with Sensei Sora the other day?“ His dark eyes sparkle slyly. "What did you train?“

Kakashi chuckles, shaking his head before pushing up and leaning against the backrest. "Genjutsu with her and Sakura, as if you didn’t know.“


Asuma grins, and Kurenai interjects, excitedly. "Oh? She came by the other day and we exchanged some information and tricks and tips, but I didn’t know she actually trained with someone.“ Her face falls somewhat. "Unfortunately, and while Hinata has very good chakra control as well, not one of my team is really interested or skilled for genjutsu.“ She sighs, a bit darkly. "I wonder why the Sandaime assigned someone with that kind of skillset to yo…“ She trails off, looking away for a moment, before bowing her head. "Forgive me, that was uncalled for.“

Kakashi shakes his head, with a sigh. "No, please, Kurenai-san, please don’t apologize.“ He frowns, with another small sigh. "He assigned the civilian girl to my team as a buffer.“ He snorts, just a bit meanly. "Too bad the girl is actually skilled.“

Asuma chuckles darkly, shaking another cigarette from his pack. "Now, now, Kakashi, you‘re not accusing my father of… scheming, are you.“

Kurenai frowns at him, and Kakashi looks away for a moment, before answering, very quietly. "No. Just… politics, I guess.“

Political reassurances to keep the jinchuriki well protected and under control, somehow. By the one with the last controllable and available sharingan. And whatever other promises you had to make…


They are quiet for a long moment. 

Kurenai breaks it, her voice soft. "I heard his dislike of genjutsu users is something that stems from his time under Senju Tobirama‘s tutelage?“

Asuma nods, blowing out the smoke. "Yes. The Nidaime had his own problems of trust regarding the Uchiha clan due to his experience with Uchiha Madara and in the war, and their use of their abilities, and these rather… ingrained feelings passed to his pupils as well.“ He raises his eyebrows, shooting a look at Kurenai. "Senju Tobirama was a great leader, and his vision has shaped Konoha forever, with the academy and the Anbu, and the actual chunin exams we sit waiting for right now… and of course the Uchiha as the police… but he was just a man, with his own set of experiences. And flaws.“

Kakashi tilts his head, his tone wistful. "Like us all.“

Asuma chuckles, taking a drag, teasing. "Liking yourself to being Hokage?“

Kakashi snorts, and then cackles. "Oh god, no. I really don’t want the hat.“

Asuma chuckles with him, but Kurenai‘s big red eyes are watchful and deep. Her voice comes a bit haltingly. "Maybe that is why you should take it, someday.“


Kakashi blinks at her, and then shakes his head, rapidly. "No, really, thank you.“ He grins suddenly, remembering a certain blond boy and his loud exclamations. "But you can give it to Naruto. He wants the damned job.“

Kurenai snickers and Asuma and Kakashi both chime in for a moment, sobering slowly, small smiles on their faces. 

Kurenai frowns with a sigh. "Isn’t it weird just how much this rivalry between Senju Hashirama and Uchiha Madara still shapes us, today?“ She shrugs, looking at them both. "I mean, it’s not even three generations past, and everyone is just whispering about them as legendary, and blown up to these otherworldly and omnipotent beings, with incomprehensible abilities… Madara’s weird purple eyes that he was supposed to have developed and that supposedly could do anything… but ultimately they were only men. Men with flaws.“ She trails off, sipping on her tea. 


Kakashi sighs through his nose, speaking the words not as painful as he anticipated. "Even the Yondaime has become legendary already. And that was only like… 10 years ago.“

And everyone keeps forgetting the powerful kunoichi who worked on those special jutsus and forms with him, combining their clans‘ abilities.  

He swallows, realizing not even he said her name. Forgive me Kushina. 

Kurenai watches his darkening gaze, her own seeing too much. 


He looks away, trying to change the subject. "From what I heard the second test will be the ‘forest of death‘?“

Asuma nods, putting out another cigarette. "Yeah. That’ll reduce the numbers by at least half.“

Kakashi nods, frowning. "Guess we’ll have to go and check when we’ll be expected to greet them at the tower.“

Kurenai sighs softly through her nose. "That test will either be an utter high for them or utter devastation. I‘m not looking forward to the fallout of the latter to be honest.“

Asuma lets his head fall back against the backrest, his voice soft. "Afraid of what Hyuuga Hiashi might do then?“

Kurenai cackles. "Ha, he put her into my care because he is so disappointed already, remember?“ She shakes her head. "No, more because of what Hinata might do to herself then. She’s already pushing herself so hard…“

Kakashi tilts his head. "Fruitlessly?“

Kurenai snorts. "Far from it. But she is no Hyuuga Neji and no Hyuuga Hanabi, her character simply not made for this kind of aggression. Which is apparently enough for her family to find her lacking.“ She shoots a dark look at Asuma. "You’re really lucky there… your team is a set one due to their clan heritage formation. It doesn’t matter if they’ll make it, their team will be a successful one, chunin status or not, and the clans behind it are pretty relaxed.“

Asuma weighs his head. "Maybe.“ He cackles. "But it does have drawbacks, too - Choji is literally eating up all my money.“

Kakashi grins. "I heard you’re inviting them to barbecue a lot.“

Asuma groans. "It’s literally the only way to get them to train.“ He points a finger. "I‘d love for them to be as driven as your kids.“

Kakashi shakes his head. "The rivalry between Naruto and Sasuke has become something else though. I mean…“ He shakes his head, grimacing, trying to put it into words. "They’re constantly at each other’s throats, they’re pushing each other, they’re trying to outdo the other, they’re turning to each other every other second… They’re so much the same and yet diametrically different…“ He trails off, finishing a bit lamely. "Like Yin and Yang.“

Asuma quirks an eyebrow. "Sounds like their connected somehow… if I didn’t know better…“

Kakashi groans, shaking his head. "Don’t start.“ He debates for a moment if he should mention the kiss but decides against it, not in the mood for a discussion on that subject. There’s something about it that itches, somewhere deep, where he cannot scratch. 


Asuma holds up his hands in mock surrender. “Alright, alright.” He quirks an eyebrow at Kurenai. “But your other two genin, Shino and Kiba are relatively easy, aren’t they?” 

Kurenai nods. “Oh yes. Shino is secretive and it took me a while to relax because of his clan specialty to be honest, but he’s very driven and yet calm. Kiba is a bit loud and mouthy, but then he grew up without a dad and he’s constantly trying to find his place and prove himself. His new puppy Akamaru is very cute.”

Kakashi’s head comes up. “Puppy?”

Kurenai laughs at him, loudly. “Hehe, I knew that would catch your attention.” She nods, with a smirk. “Yeah, the Inuzuka clan just got new puppies. The clan leader, Tsume, his mother, gave him one to train for himself. He’s integrating it into jutsus already.”

Asuma chuckles. “Wanna go over to look at cute little dogs?”

Kakashi snorts and blushes, but shakes his head. “Naaaw, I mean, we have to greet the kids after the first round to send them off to the second, right?”

Asuma grins at him. “Right.” He waggles his eyebrows. “Will you go later?”

Kakashi weighs his head, pretending to think about it. “Maybe?”

Kurenai giggles and then empties her tea, looking up at the clock on the wall. “I think we probably need to get back, see who’s made it?”

Kakashi nods, following suit. “Yeah. Let’s do that.” Excitement flutters in his stomach. 

Asuma raises his arm and waves for their check, and then shakes another cigarette from his pack. “Well then. Let’s see if any of our little genins is sent home yet.”





*******





“Sensei!”

He smirks to himself, raising his hand to wave at Naruto, who is running up to him, breathless, his blue eyes burning. 

Naruto’s voice is jubilant. “Sensei! We made it!”

Kakashi chuckles and whoops, making Naruto laugh, and he extends his hand for a high-five, which Sakura echoes after Naruto gives it rather enthusiastically. Sasuke doesn’t, but there’s a miniature smirk on his face.

Kakashi quirks an eyebrows, shoving his hands in his pockets in order not to reach out and ruffle blond hair. “So, how was it?”

Naruto scratches his head, pulling a face. “They kinda cheated.”

Sasuke’s voice is dry. “They cheated?”

Naruto turns to him, with a stubborn pout. “Well, yeah? That trick with the last question was cheating.”

Sakura rolls her eyes. “That wasn’t cheating, that was tactics, baka.”

“Pffft.” Naruto crosses his arms, glowering.

Kakashi tries to curb his mirth. And his relief. “I see.” He raises his eyebrow. “So, what happens now?”


Sakura blinks up at him. “The new examiner, Sensei Mitarashi Anko is her name I think, said we should ask you where to go for training ground 44 tomorrow.”

Kakashi nods, while his mind races. Anko, huh. Strong, beautiful, harsh and troubled Anko. Skilled and marked by Orochimaru. He narrows his eyes for a moment, wondering if there’s a connection, but dismisses the thought, Anko one of the few jonin who really likes to do these kind of tests and volunteers for them. He clicks his tongue. “Well, training ground 44 is two miles east of the village. Just take the second fork when you leave towards the general direction of all the training grounds there. You can’t miss it.”

Naruto’s big eyes look at him imploringly. “Won’t you come with us?”

Kakashi tilts his head, hesitates for a split second, trying not to fall over himself to come with, too. He sighs softly. “What did Anko say?”

Naruto looks down, shuffles his feet. “To ask you and then come there tomorrow morning.”

Kakashi nods, trying to seem stern, while he is still fighting the impulse to reach out and hug him. Them. Dammit. “And that is what you’ll do. This is an exam after all.”

Naruto sighs, looking away, while Sasuke rolls his eyes, mumbling something under his breath. Kakashi sighs quietly to himself. “Why don’t you go home and relax a bit. Eat well and try to sleep well, too. You will need your strength.”


He can see Ibiki leave the building from the corner of his eyes, raising his chin at his team. “Off you go, now. Heed my instructions. And… good luck.” He hesitates, before giving them an eye smile, his voice carrying his sincerity. “I believe in you.”

Naruto beams up at him, and then turns to Sakura with a grin, and Sakura blushes and Sasuke smirks to himself and Kakashi shoos at them, making them giggle and run towards the village center, Naruto yelling something about ‘getting some ramen as reward’.

Kakashi looks after them for a moment, missing them already, and then forces himself to turn and walk after Ibiki, catching up with the burly man right in front of the Hokage tower. “Ibiki-san.”

Ibiki tilts his head back to him. “Ah, Kakashi-san. What can I do for you.”

Kakashi frowns, deciding to be blunt, knowing any skirting around the subject would only invite Ibiki’s curiosity, and he really has no wish to be the center of Ibiki’s interest. “I was interested how my team fared.”


Ibiki stops in the entrance hall, turning to him. “Who is your team?”

Kakashi tilts his head. “Uchiha Sasuke, Haruna Sakura and Uzumaki Naruto.”

Ibiki stares for a moment, and then starts to laugh, roaringly. 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow and waits, trying not to feel… pissed. 

Ibiki sobers slowly, shaking his head, his voice shaking with mirth still. “Forgive me, Kakashi-san. But that last one…” He goes through the tests he’s carrying, still chuckling, pulling a sheet out. “Here, see for yourself.”

He holds out the test for Kakashi to take and Kakashi frowns, gingerly reaching for the paper, staring at it, at the energetically written name and… nothing else. What the hell? He blinks. “I… don’t understand.”


Ibiki nods, tugging the sheet of paper out of his fingers again. “Your boy Naruto did not answer one question - except the only one mattering. Which was not on this paper.” He hesitates for a moment. “And he inspired everyone else to… answer it correctly then, too.” He quirks an eyebrow. “Interesting team you have there. Interesting members.” He turns to leave, stopping to look back at Kakashi for a moment. “By the way, the girl, Sakura, she answered them all, correctly.” He nods at Kakashi. “That’s jonin-level knowledge.” He turns to the stairs again. “The other I don’t know. I couldn’t catch him cheating though I’m pretty sure he did.”

Kakashi frowns, following him slowly. “You’re pretty sure he did?”

Ibiki shrugs, but keeps on walking up to the offices. “He used his sharingan. But he did it covertly enough we couldn’t find out who exactly he copied. So, skilled enough.”

Kakashi hums, stopping in front of the doors to the Hokage’s office. “Thank you Ibiki-san.”

Ibiki looks at him for a moment, the dark eyes glittering. He turns towards the doors, reaching for the handle. “No worries, Kakashi. A team as interesting and unpredictable as yours… they’ll make it. Just trust them.”

Kakashi snorts, a small true smile on his lips. He inclines his head in thanks, watching the doors close behind the big form. Insanely glad that Ibiki had been in the mood to humor him.



He stares at the door for a moment longer, the voices inside muted, and then turns towards the aide’s offices. The elderly woman behind the desk in the organizational office looks up at him, her still flaming red hair denoting her as Uzumaki-descendant. Kakashi has known her all his life, and he briefly wonders how old she really is, the Uzumaki blessed with a strong life-force after all. Something in him relaxes at the thought, the aspect an additional reassurance in regards to Naruto somehow. Well, if the bijou doesn’t go on another rampage. “Excuse me Yui-san, I was wondering when the team leaders should show up at the tower after round two of the exams?”

She smiles up at him, her violet eyes vivid. “Ah, Kakashi-san. So nice to see you once more. I haven’t seen you since you left the Anbu! How have you been?”

He inclines his head, giving her an eye-smile. “Very well, thank you Yui. As you probably surmised, I am now a jonin-leader.”

“Ohhh. This must be so exciting for you then?” She grins up at him and he cannot help but grin back, shrugging lightly. 

“It is. Is round two three days once more? My team is team 7.”

She nods, but frowns, looking down at her papers. “Yes, but…” She hesitates, flipping through the sheets. “Ah, there.” She looks up again. “Umino Iruka has asked to be the one to greet team 7 at the tower.”

Kakashi shifts on his feet, not knowing how to feel suddenly. He opens his mouth and then closes it again, saying lamely: “I see.”

She blinks up at him. “Is that not okay? I can go and ask the Hokage or Anko-san to re…”

He interjects, hastily, holding up his hands. “No, no, sorry, that is fine.” I… guess he has every right to want to greet them, but… I mean, with everything I put him through but… He should have told me. He frowns, swallowing past the restriction in his throat. “Thank you, Yui-san.”

“Alright.” She blinks at him, obviously on the verge of saying something, but decides against it. He turns to leave and she calls after him, and he can hear the smile in her voice. “By the way, Kakashi-san, Jiraiya-sama has sent word he’d be back soon. The Sandaime had been looking for him. We’re hoping he will arrive in the next few days.”

He looks back at her, smiling widely under his mask, knowing it transmits. “That’s good.” 

She grins at him, nodding. “I’ll let you know.”

He nods, in thanks. “Thank you.”


He leaves, his steps lighter somehow and yet laden, churning with all the information he received in the last few minutes. Sakura’s knowledge, Sasuke’s skill, Naruto’s charisma, Iruka’s … interference, Jiraiya’s return.


It’s going to be an interesting few days.

I think I’ll just… pay Iruka a visit afterwards. 


He looks up at the sky when he is outside again, smirking to himself.


Guess that leaves me time to greet some puppies.



Having time off does come with advantages at times.





*******





Pakkun and Kiba lie lazily in the sun with him, all three of them emotionally blissed out by hundreds of puppy-kisses and cuddles. Kakashi grins to himself, his fingers threading softly through the hairs on Pakkun’s belly, something the small dog really likes and steadfastly denies ever allowing. Shiba snores lightly, the litter of pups off to the side and around him, snoring, too. 


A shadow falls over Kakashi’s face, and he raises his hand to shield his eyes, keeping his voice very quiet. “Tsume-san. Thank you for letting us play with them.”

The tall woman with the slightly feral expression grins at him. “My pleasure, Kakashi-san.” She smirks at his dogs, her grin widening. “You could bring your whole pack, I hope you know that.”

Kakashi nods. “I know, thank you. But I didn’t want to overwhelm them.”

She quirks an eyebrow. “The pack or the pups?”

Kakashi chuckles softly. “Both?”

She chimes in for a moment, her eyes turning wistful. “Do you… think they’re alright?”

Kakashi looks up at her, replaying what Kurenai said. “Kiba is growing into his power right now, he’s already training jutsus with his puppy. Don’t worry too much.” He lowers his hand, looking up at the sky for a long moment. “While the chunin exams are supposedly to the death… they haven’t been for years, even though the Sandaime does press the point in his speeches. No-one wants the kids to actually die. And though they might get wounded… our doctors are very proficient.”

He can sense her swallow.

Her voice is rough. “Thank you, Kakashi.”

He smirks, painfully, behind his mask. “It’ll be alright.” It better be.

She inhales deeply, nodding. A huge dog comes up behind her, and she turns, scratching the head vigorously. “Ahhh, time for nursing them soon?” She chuckles, quirking an eyebrow at Kakashi. “This must be the first time that the puppies don’t rush at her. Want to come over regularly?”

He chuckles, and then sobers, shaking his head. “I have a feeling I will have my hands full soon. But thank you.”

She nods, grinning when Pakkun sighs happily, shifting so Kakashi can reach the other side of his belly. “Come by anytime.”





*******




He doesn’t need to search out Iruka after all, because Iruka drops down next to him when he is on his way to the academy hall, two days later. 


One look at his face answers the question, and Kakashi cannot help himself, he groans in relief, stopping right there in the street to let his head fall back, breathing deeply. 

Iruka chuckles next to him. “Able to breathe again, hmm?”

Kakashi closes his eyes, chuckling. “You know me too well.”

Iruka bumps into him, on purpose, and they start walking, slowly. “They made it just in time, and they looked rough, but they’re all healthy and safe for now. I invited them for ramen, after.” He hesitates for a moment, shooting Kakashi a look, before lowering his voice. “They’ve had a run in with Oroshimaru.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, the only outward sign of the icy block of dread that settles in his stomach. “Oh?”

Iruka nods. “Yeah, and he apparently… put a curse mark onto Sasuke. I saw it when I had them checked after their arrival. But it seems like he has it under control, at least for now.” He swallows, sharing a look with Kakashi. “I’m not sure if he did something with Naruto. His chakra seemed a bit off, but then they’d just gotten through a heavy test.” He sighs. “I told them not to overdo it in the third round. However, since there are too many still, they’ll push them through some preliminary fights right away.”


Shit. Kakashi frowns, his tone clipped. “Sakura?”

Iruka shrugs. “Her hair is shorter. Not sure what happened there.” He tilts his head. “The chunin exams are no child’s play, we both know that. I remember mine quite vividly… “ He trails off, shooting Kakashi a look. “Did you ever take the actual chunin exams?”

Kakashi nods, somewhat absentmindedly, his mind still stuck on the curse mark information. “Yes, I defeated Guy. Who defeated Obito before.”

Iruka stares at him. “You must have been… what… 6?”

Kakashi shrugs. “It was war. They needed soldiers. They needed officers. They promoted everyone who didn’t run for the trees.” He snorts. “Or at least that is how it feels now.”

There is a pause between them, heavy with memories. 


Kakashi sighs through his nose, looking over at Iruka after a moment. “Where are they now?”

Iruka shrugs. “I sent them to the academy hall already, because I wanted to talk to you without them.”

Kakashi nods. “Good call.” He glowers a bit at Iruka. “Not like requesting to meet them at the tower without me knowing.”

Iruka has the grace to blush, stammering just the slightest bit. “Yeah, I… know, I mean, I…” He sighs, shrugging. “I needed to be there.” He smiles painfully, his tone pleading, willing Kakashi to understand. “I needed to see that we really made the right decision.”

Kakashi halts, waits until Iruka turns to him. “We?”

Iruka shrugs, somewhat peevishly. “Yeah, well, you don’t think I’d let them participate if I didn’t trust your judgment.” He shrugs. “Which makes it my decision, too.”

Kakashi exhales, and then shakes his head, allowing the warm feeling in his gut to spread. To adapt. “Thank you, Iru-kun.”


Iruka nods, his gaze averted, feet shuffling for a moment. He clears his throat. “But you need to train them for the last round, if they make it through the preliminaries. And it needs to be focused training.”

Kakashi inhales deeply, looking away for a long moment. “I think Sensei Sora will accept my request to train with Sakura some more. I am the only one with a sharingan, so I will need to go and train with Sasuke. As for Naruto - he needs to learn much a lot more chakra control…” 

He shoots a look at Iruka but Iruka raises his hand, waving him off. “Sorry, I cannot. I have to prepare the new school year.” He snaps his fingers. “But Ebisu-san would be perfect to teach Naruto the fine-tunings to the basics? Want me to talk to him on your behalf?”

Kakashi weighs his head and then nods, accepting the offer. “Tell him he needs to at least manage to walk on water. And then to continue from there.“ As Sakura has learned already. As for Sasuke… we will train the sharingan, which will need its own chakra control.


He opens his mouth to add some more, but is interrupted.

“Sensei Kakashi!”

Kakashi frowns, tilting his head towards the Anbu that’s just dropped out of the sky. “Yes?”

“The Hokage has requested your presence, Senpai.”

It’s really no use telling them not to use the title anymore, isn’t it. He looks at the purple hair trailing down the back. But then we’ve been through so much, haven’t we, Yugao. 

He inclines his head. “I’ll be there momentarily.” He waits until Yugao has jumped away, before turning back to Iruka. “Guess I need to get going. Please talk to Ebisu for me.”

Iruka nods, opens his mouth as if to say something, but closes it again, his lips twisting into a wry smile instead.


Kakashi knows that Iruka knows he’s echoing it. 





*******




“Sandaime-sama.”

Kakashi bows his head, and the Sandaime waves at him, stepping away from the other jonin leaders already there, waving him to follow him into a small room off to the side where Anko is waiting. Kakashi nods at her, returning his attention to the Hokage right after, who addresses him as soon as the door closes. “Kakashi. Thank you for coming.”

Kakashi tilts his head. “Of course. I was already on my way.”

The Sandaime exhales, turning so his back is towards the other jonin. “Are you aware that there will be preliminaries?”


Kakashi nods, sighing silently, shooting a look at Anko. “Yes.”

“Orochimaru put a curse mark on Sasuke. He should quit the test.” Anko’s voice is hard. 

Kakashi narrows his eyes at her, remembering Iruka’s words. “No. He is strong enough to control it.”

Anko scoffs, opening her mouth to argue her point, but the Hokage holds up his hand. “Sasuke will continue the exams.”

Anko quiets, glowering at them both.

The Hokage raises his chin. “I firmly believe the Uchiha boy will make it. I need you to teach him for the final part of the exam afterwards.”

Kakashi frowns, somehow ticked wrongly by the tone. What now? “I had intended to do this anyways.”

The Sandaime locks their gazes. “I want you to teach him chidori.”

Kakashi… stares for a long moment, his mind blank. He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “You wish me to teach him an assassination technique.”


This assassination technique.


MY assassination technique.


And I know why, too. I… know why. Something in him twists, sharply, claws unfolding. Stretching, ready to jump. You’re not even pretending anymore, are you. There’s even a witness, now. The thought is very bitter.

The Sandaime’s voice is hard. “Yes. You should not be the only one able to use it. Besides, it is a good opportunity to train the boy’s sharingan.”

Kakashi scoffs, unwilling to hide his frustration. “Sasuke is no assassin.” And definitely not an assassin for… the jinchuriki.

Hiruzen’s voice is icy. “He is a weapon, a tool, like any ninja.” 

Kakashi pulls a face behind his mask, careful not to show it. You wish.

The Sandaime turns away, his tone brooking no argument. “I wish for him to demonstrate the jutsu in the final round of the exam.” He doesn’t wait for confirmation, leaving, his white robes rustling.

Anko gets up silently, and follows him, her eyes averted.


Kakashi stares after them, his stomach churning.


And then he smiles grimly, the thought sharp, vicious. It’s a good thing you don’t know about the kiss, isn’t it… because it will blunt your sword once more.


I trust Sasuke not to use chidori to kill Naruto.


You just wait and see.




But he cannot help himself, beyond trust and reason there’s… fear.


Deep, deep within him.





He swallows it down and joins the other jonin, taking his place next to Guy and Asuma, behind the Hokage.

Waiting for the genin to be let in, for another fight… to their supposed deaths.





His tattoo burns, and he blinks, willing the tear away, knowing just who is waiting, there, just beyond the door.





Chapter 13: No need to die, today

Notes:

(I was able to write a lot this weekend, and since so many of you wish for the Sandaime to be finally gone… here’s a shorter chapter getting us closer to that (soon^^). Also 157k now and counting^^).

 

The chunin preliminaries hold a lot of realizations… and an epiphany. 😈

There’s a lot of small things in this chapter. I’m ‘streamlining’ the preliminaries though, despite the important fights, bc it felt repetitive (I rewrote this like four times). But I think we all remember Gaara and Lee etc. vividly, don’t we, so I figured it wouldn’t need to be too detailed here (same goes for the attack, I’m only hooking into it where needed) :))

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

He watches the lot come in, the 21 remaining genins dirty, dusty and smelly, but elated.

Naruto is in the front, his face a bit stressed but the eyes are glowing, and Kakashi looks at him, watches him look over all the assembled teachers, watches him realize that they’re standing here respectfully, for them. He sees the faint blush that creeps up, feels the tickle of the tattoo. 

The thought is warm. Yes, Naruto. We’re here for all of you. 

His gaze glides from Naruto to Sasuke who is standing behind him, the expression pinched, which is no surprise, given the curse mark. Sakura’s expression denotes pride, and Kakashi smirks softly to himself.

 

Guy addresses him, bragging about his team winning against Kakashi’s while Anko and the Sandaime speak, and Kakashi smirks a bit grimly to himself, not really in the mood, but knowing exactly how to rile Guy up.

“Huh? Sorry, did you say something?”

Off to his side he can hear Asuma snicker, hiding it in a cough. While Guy averts his eyes, with a raised and clenched fist, as he always does when Kakashi beats him in a perceived game. Weirdly enough it makes Kakashi feel slightly better. Thank you, Guy. 

He listens to the Hokage make the speech about fighting to the death for the sake of peace between villages and his heart beats in his throat when Naruto calls out: “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard!”

Yesssss, you go you little imp. And it is stupid.

You don’t need to die here today. 

Asuma elbows him into the side.

Kakashi inclines his head a bit, hiding his grin, shooting a look at Iruka, who is off to the side in the front row, staring straight ahead. Probably not daring to show a reaction. 

 

He frowns when Gekko Hayate takes over, Yugao’s soul-mate looking decidedly sick and coughing heavily between words. He tilts his head towards Asuma, the words a whisper. “What’s up with him?”

Asuma’s answer is almost inaudible. “He’s had that cough for a while now. Some of the Anbu had it. Maybe he got it from Yugao. I know she coughed but she got better again.”

Kakashi frowns, leaning back. Some of the Anbu? He leans in again, tries to breathe the words. “Who else of the Anbu?”

Asuma is quiet for a long moment. “Fu I know of. And I heard…” His voice lowers even more. “I heard that Itachi apparently coughed a few times as well before… that fateful night. It’s been around for a while apparently.”

Kakashi tilts his head towards him, for a moment, looks at him from the corner of his hidden eye. Looking through the cloth, knowing Asuma can sense it. 

Asuma shrugs, just lightly. 

Hayate coughs again, interrupting his thought and drawing his attention. 

Kakashi can feel Guy look at him. He relaxes again, deliberately, his mind churning. A debilitating cough, that some heal easily from, and others… He sighs, blowing the air out quietly, berating himself a bit. Ugh stop it… You’re beginning to see conspiracies at every corner. 

 

Hayate keeps explaining, interrupted by coughs, and Kakashi wishes he could be in his stead, silently glowering at the man’s back. You belong in bed, Hayate. Or in the hospital. That cough really doesn’t sound good. 

There’s a moment of confusion as one of the genins gives up, but the others stay, and Kakashi inhales, deeply. Trying to steel himself.

The big board is revealed and Kakashi’s stomach starts to flutter, his gaze riveted now to Naruto, who has turned to Sasuke, who in turn is clasping his curse mark. Dammit. It responds to his emotions?

The board lights up, with Sasuke’s name of course, and Akado Yoroi‘s.

 

 

Kakashi hesitates for a second, and then steps down to Sasuke, smirking at Naruto’s wild and loud greeting but keeps his focus on the raven-haired boy who is echoing his pose and pretends to be utterly unimpressed. He tries to convey the importance, his voice imploring. “Sasuke… Don’t use the sharingan.” He lets his eyes travel to Sasuke’s neck and back, quirks an eyebrow. 

Sasuke’s eyes snap to his, dark. “How did you know?”

Kakashi ignores the question, while pretending to watch the others walk up to the balustrade. He lowers his voice. “If the spell mark is allowed to run rampant the consequences will change your life forever.”

Sasuke’s reply is dry, shivering with a weird undertone. “I figured.”

You have no idea. “If they see any sign of that the match will be suspended. And I’ll be the one to stop you. Please don’t forget that.” That wouldn’t be pretty. Kakashi wills Sasuke to understand.

 

Sasuke averts his eyes and Kakashi sighs, sharing a look with Hayate, who nods. Well, then. Here goes nothing. 

He jumps up, landing slightly behind Naruto and Sakura, just as the fight begins, and he keeps his attention on Sasuke, but watches their reactions as well.

 

Naruto yells at Sasuke in encouragement, while Sakura calls to warn him. Kakashi smirks. The emotional bonds are quite tight already. Chunin or not, the exam has done them good as a team. He sighs softly to himself.

There is a moment where Sasuke almost gives up, but Naruto yells at him again, right then, with a few chosen words: “How can you call yourself still Uchiha, Sasuke? You’re a disgrace to… to yourself. Aren’t you embarrassed to have everyone see you as a big loser?”

Kakashi almost laughs, the influx of rage-powered energy rather obvious, and Sasuke wins the battle, despite the curse mark trying to take over. Well, well, well, look at that, there’s some strength in you. He shoots a look at Naruto. And some slyness in you. 

 

Kakashi returns his gaze to the arena, and quirks an eyebrow, watching Sasuke fall to the ground, just as he is declared winner.

He jumps down, casually, nonchalantly, book in hand, using his knee to the boy up. He keeps his voice light. “Hey! You won.” Congratulations. Now you get to learn how to kill with my jutsu soon. 

The taste in his mouth is chocolate. 

 

Sasuke tilts his head, still breathing hard.

Naruto is yelling from the balcony, waving at them. “Hey Sasuke! You won… but in such an uncool way. And you came out looking like you’re the one who got beat up.”

Kakashi bites his tongue to curb his mirth, chancing a look down at Sasuke. Who is looking up at Naruto, his voice decidedly happy when he says: “Shut up, clown.”

Something warm flutters deep within Kakashi’s guts. 

 

He watches as the other ninja is carried away, watches as one of the medical team comes over to them. He interjects quietly, adamantly. “I’ll handle him. He can come with me right now and I’ll seal away his curse mark.”

Sasuke’s voice actually carries a whine. “Can’t this wait? I want to watch everyone else compete.”

Kakashi shakes his head, lets the determination color his voice. “No. Don’t let your emotions cloud your judgement. This thing is spreading like a disease, and it’s already close to the point of no return.” I know the rush of elation at feeling a power like that, at using that power… it will destroy you. “I let you have your way this time, and it’s only made you greedy.” It almost took over. 

Sasuke looks away, a bit sullen. 

 

Kakashi carefully withdraws his knee, just a bit, watching as Sasuke sways for a moment and then steadies. “Can you walk?”

Sasuke’s face darkens, but he nods, and he pushes himself up, and Kakashi steers him out of the hall and the building, all the way down into the catacombs beneath the Hokage tower. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The sealing hall is quiet, cool, and he closes the door behind them, gently pushing Sasuke towards the space between the pillars. “There. Sit down there please, and take off your shirt.”

Sasuke shoots him a dark look but does as he says, taking the shirt off with jerky movements, throwing it to the side.

 

Kakashi cuts his palm and sets up the circles, marking them with kunai instead of candles, reflecting drily how Minto would have rolled his eyes at his practicality-driven adjustment.

‘The form is important, Kakashi. Just as the seal itself carries power, the perception of the subject is important, too. You have to touch their souls to make them receptive for what you’re trying to do.’ Kakashi smirks wryly to himself. Forgive me, Sensei. Besides, I think Sasuke is receptive enough to kunais as markers. 

 

He runs his fingers down Sasuke’s back, repeatedly, starting from the mark, watches the blood form the letters through his will. He hesitates for a moment, after the last line. “That’s it!” He inhales deeply, knowing that this will hurt. “Just a little longer and it’s all done.”

He presses his palms together and then does the signs in rapid succession.“Fujahoin. The sealing of the curse!” He presses his palm to the mark, and Sasuke screams beneath his hand, jerking, but he keeps pressing, grimly, watching the lines recede to form the actual seal.

 

Sasuke is shivering, and Kakashi carefully addresses him, making his voice sterner than he feels like being. “Even if the curse mark should awaken again, the power of this seal should contain it. But… Sasuke, the foundation of the seal’s power is your own will. You have to want it to work. And you must believe in your power to contain it. If you don’t… the curse mark will have its way again.”

Sasuke looks at him, darkly, from the corner of his eyes, and then promptly passes out. 

 

Kakashi sighs, and then freezes, as a chill runs through the room.

He wonders if he can actually reach a kunai, knowing he can not when the whisper echoes through the room. Damn.

 

Orochimaru’s voice is soft, lilting, gleeful. “You’ve mastered the sealing spells, Kakashi?” There is a small laugh, ghosting through the room. “Looks like you’re all grown up.”

Kakashi turns, slowly, tries to keep his movements unthreatening.

The pale figure steps into the light, hands clasped lightly behind his back. “It’s been a long time.”

Kakashi glowers at him. “Orochimaru.”

The Sannin quirks a sculpted eyebrow. “Forgive me my rudeness Kakashi, but I have no use for you. I’m here for the boy behind you.”

Of course. “What do you want with Sasuke?”

The long black hair shifts as Orochimaru weighs his head. “Oh, you know how it is… two guys have something… and a third one just has to get it, too.”

Two guys? Kakashi narrows his eyes. 

Orochimaru beams at him, clearly having fun. “You haven’t had it for very long yourself, you know. Know what it is yet?”

Not very long may be pushing it, but… Kakashi swallows. “It’s the sharingan.” He hesitates for a long moment, fatalistically knowing he has to try. “You could try to take mine?”

Orochimaru shrugs, with a slight sigh. “I must possess Uchiha blood.”

 

Ah. So that is why you didn’t try to take it back then.

Fuck. 

 

Kakashi blinks, his voice rough, uncomfortably aware of the fact that he is, for all intents and purposes, alone here, now. With Orochimaru. “What for?”

Orochimaru smirks softly. “The newly created village of hiding in Sound - Otogakure… that is my home, you see… is it becoming clear?”

You want to build an army around Sasuke. Use him and his body… To build your own village… To reincarnate into him. Oh yes, quite clear. His reply is sharp, taunting. “So it’s just your greed - and delusions of grandeur.” Come on. Attack me. I’ll use that which you don’t want and sell my life very dearly and the resulting ruckus will draw the others… 

Orochimaru chuckles softly, interrupting his thoughts. “I suppose you could say that. Good help is so hard to find these days… and I need all kind of… pawns at my disposal.”

Kakashi almost snorts, glowering at Orochimaru. “So you think Sasuke is one of your pawns?”

You think I am, too?

Orochimaru smiles, and it sends a shiver down Kakashi’s spine. “Oh, he’s a very special pawn… a real keeper.” He shrugs, clicking his tongue. “Unlike the boys who are going through the rigors of exam right now.” The smile is vicious. “Those boys are disposable.”

 

Disposable… Kakashi clenches his fists, feeling sick, and then lets his right hand fall forward, shifting his stance. “The children are not disposable.”

They never are. 

No matter what times we live in. 

“Hmmm.” A too long tongue snakes out, licks around lips. “No, not all of them.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “Have your eyes on someone else, too?” Make him talk. The longer we’re gone… 

Orochimaru chuckles. “Your Sensei’s little offspring is carrying something rather interesting, don’t you think?”

Dread settles in Kakashi’s stomach, makes his mouth dry. He forces the words out. “I don’t know what you mean.”

Orochimaru chuckles again, tilting his head, way too perceptive for Kakashi’s liking. “Such a shame you’re wearing a different uniform now… I would love to see how the tattoo has changed.”

 

Ice travels down Kakashi’s spine, settling at his very core. He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “My soul-bond is none of your business. Nor who it is with.”

Orochimaru narrows his eyes. “Mhhh. We will see.” He sighs, decidedly fake, looking past Kakashi to Sasuke. “For now… I really need the boy.”

Kakashi opens his sharingan behind the hitai-ate, foregoing pushing it up, his left hand clasping his right wrist to steady it, already gathering chakra. The world shifts into blind focus, sharp and unforgiving. His voice is heated, and yet cold. “Stay away from Sasuke.”

Stay away from my… team. 

And him.

 

Chidori flares up, noisy and wild and beautiful, as always. He pushes all of his strength into his voice, his determination. “Even if you are one of the Sannin….The man I am today can take you down.” I hope. Or I will die, here and now, defending my… pupil. 

Something shifts within him, something protective. It’s been there before of course, has been growing since their Land of Waves mission, but now… it’s real somehow. 

He knows he would die for them, if need be. 

For them all. 

 

For a split second his thoughts shift to the blond boy in the academy hall right now, cheering his friends on. 

Naruto, I‘ll… try. 

 

Orochimaru tilts his head, looks at him for a moment and then laughs at him, loudly.

Kakashi gnashes his teeth, his voice dark. “What’s so funny.”

Orochimaru’s voice carries his amusement, his dark eyes seemingly tearing into Kakashi’s very soul. Seeing  too much. “You say one thing and do another.”

The muscles in Kakashi’s jaw jump. “What?”

Whatever are you getting at now. 

Orochimaru chuckles a moment more and then turns to leave, slowly. Seemingly changing the subject again. “The curse binding you put on Sasuke was futile. Because… When a heart is sufficiently focused and ruthless in its desires… then for good or evil, the end will always justify the means. Right, Kakashi?“ 

The sentences hangs between them, heavy and stifling, for long moments, and Kakashi knows that Orochimaru knows that he… understands. 

The end justifies the means… no, it must not. Not… always. He knows that the game is played like that though, his mind frantically trying to interpret what exactly Orochimaru might be hinting at. 

 

Orochimaru clicks his tongue at him, the change in tone making it obvious he’s dropping the subject. "Sasuke possesses such a heart. The heart of an avenger.”

Kakashi’s voice is a growl. “So that is how you got your hooks into him. But Sasuke’s not…” 

Me. 

Orochimaru shrugs, fully turning away. “A day will come when he will seek me out, hungry for power.” His voice turns to an hiss. “I’m sure of it. Meanwhile… “ His voice takes a lilting sing-song tone again, filled to the brim with glee. “You were offering to kill me. Care to try? Care to… cut your suffering for your lovely bonded short?” A sizzling, like a snake, and a shiver runs through Kakashi’s limbs, followed by a vicious jolt of anger. 

Kakashi’s voice is a hiss. “You know nothing of my suffering.”

Orochimaru halts, tilting his head back, just a bit. “Really.” He hums, with a small smile. “I know well of your bonds… even those you are not aware of.”

Kakashi grimaces. “What are you talking about.”

 

Orochimau‘s voice is… amused. “Oh, nothing, nothing… the time is not right yet.” He shoots a glance at Kakashi. “Now… give it a try? Or are you all talk?”

Kakashi grimaces behind his mask, the lightning dancing around his hand. 

If I engage him now… I‘ll die, Sasuke‘ll die… I might be able to wound him, but given that there is still no Anbu here it would take them too long to catch him. 

I won‘t fulfill the bond but… 

 

I‘ll fulfill my duty. 

 

He smiles, grimly. 

 

He lets chidori intensify, concentrates… and his tattoo burns suddenly, sharply, just for a moment, inflamed by his determination, and on its heel comes a longing, so potent Kakashi cannot breathe, the need to return to Naruto a living, writhing thing, demanding to be… acknowledged, to be realized.

 

Demanding to be felt.

And he cannot help but, the tendrils of hope tearing at him.

 

Kakashi swallows harshly, almost hyperventilating now, torn between duty and will and… life and helpless hope, promising him the future still. 

 

Promising love.

 

Maybe. 

 

Someday.

 

 

 

Love I don’t deserve.

 

 

 

He watches the Sannin retreat, slowly, tauntingly, with measured steps, and he knows, he knows he would be able to land a blow. But… 

He inclines his head, shoots a look at the unconscious boy at his feet, and then looks to the general direction of the academy, feeling like crying. 

 

He remembers suddenly what he said to Naruto on the bridge, choose to die for someone you love, and he blinks, the decision already made, against his conscious mind. 

I… don’t need to die here today, do I. 

I should… but I don’t need to. 

Not… yet. 

 

He lets chidori flare out, the room seeming dark and gloomy in its absence. 

He closes his eyes, only reopening his normal right one after a moment. His breaths echo around the chamber, and he knows that Orochimaru is gone. 

A part of him is wondering about Orochimaru retreating after all the taunting. I guess he didn’t want to get caught… But why? What’s his plan. He speaks the words out loud, sounding as defeated as he feels. “What kind of fool am I?” 

A fool… longing for another… fool, apparently. 

 

Fuck. 

 

I… fuck. 

 

He stares into the darkness for long seconds, trying to find some kind of an emotional equilibrium again. 

You know that is how it is for soul-mates… get a grip. That is exactly what Iruka meant back then. You know that the ones bound are unwilling to sacrifice themselves because they long … and you also know that, if push comes to shove you still would, especially for… him. 

Still. 

 

That is not all there is to it, though, is it.

Kakashi sniffs, shaking his head at himself. Banishes the realization, that he wants to be saved. Maybe. 

 

He curses, viciously, the words echoing around them. 

 

And then he picks Sasuke up, and hurries over to the hospital, the body in his arms shivering. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The white cloth rustles, gently, silently, whispering. The steps are almost inaudible, carefully pronounced with the usage of the walking stick Danzo is fond of using these days. 

Announcing his presence.

Carefully, deliberately. 

 

Kakashi blinks, and closes the door quietly, turning to stand in front of Sasuke’s hospital room.

Right in front of Sasuke’s hospital room door.

He keeps his voice pleasant, with an effort. “Danzo-sama.”

 

“Kakashi-san.” The wrapped man watches Kakashi from his visible left eye. Kakashi tries to remember if he ever saw Danzo without the wraps, or when and if they changed, but he cannot. He just knows that there is something about Danzo that makes the hairs on his neck stand up. 

Something tied to the knowledge of Danzo’s obvious interest in those that wear the sharingan.

Something tied to the memory of Danzo’s incredible manipulation skills.

 

Something tied to the knowledge, that Senju Tobirama chose Hiruzen, instead of Danzo, then.

 

The older man’s voice is stern, but nice. “Your genin is quite powerful. To resist a curse mark this easily.”

Kakashi grimaces behind his mask, realizing Danzo must have watched the fights from somewhere. He clears his throat. “Indeed.” He hesitates, knowing that Danzo must know why he took Sasuke away. “It is now sealed. Time will tell if he is indeed strong enough.”

Danzo hums, quirking his visible eyebrow. His tone is deceptively light. “I’m surprised Orochimaru… hasn’t shown up.”

Kakashi blinks, and then looks up at him, slowly, locking their gazes. His heart is beating in his throat. How… He keeps his voice as light as he can make it. “I doubt Sasuke would be here, now, if he had. Right?”

Danzo smiles, sharply, the word drawn out wickedly. “Indeed.” He clicks his tongue. “Still. It would have been a perfect opportunity.”

Right. Like it’s a very good opportunity for you to be here, now. With Sasuke supposedly incapacitated and alone. Kakashi’s voice is toneless, his eye boring into Danzo’s. “No-one can really tell what’s going on in Orochimaru’s head, we will have to wait and see.”

Danzo hums again, turning just slightly away. “That is what we have to do now, anyways, isn’t it. Wait and see how our chunin candidates fare?” He smiles pleasantly. “Don’t you have two other genins in tournament, still?”

Kakashi blinks, ice traveling down his spine. As if you do not know. And if you think I’m going to leave now and leave Sasuke unprotected you have another thing coming. He smiles, giving Danzo an eye-smile that feels so fake it hurts. “Indeed.”

They stare at each other for a moment. 

Danzo clicks his tongue. “He awakened two tomoe already… only Itachi awakened his earlier I believe.”

Kakashi blinks, frowning at the change of subject.

Danzo sighs, continuing. “Such a shame that the third one can only be awakened by betraying a friend and the accompanying emotions.” He chuckles. “Or so legend has it.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “Sasuke will have to make do with two tomoe then… betraying a friend isn’t worth it.”

Danzo tilts his head back at him. There is sharp humor underneath the compassionate words. “No, of course not.”

They stare at each other, for another long moment.

Lightning trickles along Kakashi’s bones, and the air smells of ozone, ripe and dangerous.

Danzo inhales deeply, and then starts walking down the corridor. “We will… talk after the exams, Hatake Kakashi. I will send you a message.”

Kakashi watches him go, grimacing harshly behind his mask. Not if I can help it.

He hisses, and then signals for a doctor. 

 

I need to get the Anbu before I return to the exams. At least a whole squad.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He watches the fights, the important fights of his cute little genins, with ever increasing unease.

 

Iruka is watching him in between these fights, the weight of his gaze heavy. 

Kakashi grimaces, not daring to look up. What do you see? What gave my little epiphany earlier away, huh? You really know me too well. He sighs, shifting his stance to deliberately exude relaxed attentiveness once more. 

 

Sakura manages a draw against Ino, by using the training that she got from Sensei Sora. Kakashi smiles proudly, jumping down to retrieve her. 

 

Naruto wins against Kiba, loudly proclaiming about conceived injustices, and Kakashi desperate relief rushes through him as he silently reflects about that pattern Naruto exudes. Has exuded in regards to Kankuro’s puppet, Kiba’s pet, the food pill. And even the first test.

 

Kakashi frowns. You really have a very strong sense of righteousness… not that it will, in all likelihood, help you in your life as a ninja. If there’s anything that Shinobi do, it’s cheat, any way they can. He sighs. It’s how we survive. Or at least most of us. The sigh turns wistful, and then gets tinged with a smile. Still. Keep believing Naruto. Keep fighting for what’s right.

 

Keep making ME believe.

 

Kakashi blinks, the last part feeling almost like a premonition. Again.

He raises his gaze to the ceiling for a split second, his eyes unseeing. I might need to talk to him about other people not sharing his attitude though.

 

 

He watches as Naruto almost jumps up the stairs, their eyes catching for a split second. The connection shivers between them, and now, now his tattoo tingles once more. He snorts softly and has to clench the cloth of his pockets in order not to reach out and ruffle that hair, or hug the little rascal. Well done, well done. And the bruises are almost gone already, too.

You really are a maverick ninja.

 

He watches as Hinata musters all her courage to give the ointment to Naruto, sharing a look with Kurenai in the process. Someone else helplessly stricken by the boy. He smirks, the smirk dropping off his mouth as his brain catches up with his thought.

He banishes it, and the accompanying feeling, his heart beating in his throat. 

Baka. Stop this, right now. You’re his Sensei now, making it all worse. And he’s still a kid, too.

 

He smirks softly when Neji tells Hinata she cannot change herself, Naruto’s voice indignantly high as he yells at him from above. “Yes, she can! You can’t just arbitrarily decide these things about other people, you fool. Show him, Hinata! Beat up this idiot!”

 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, amused that Naruto knows the word ‘arbitrarily’ and then pissed at himself for the thought. He’s not stupid, you know that. Just missing a lot of… care. Education. He watches as Hinata adopts Naruto’s ninja way: ‘Never quit, never go back on my word‘. 

Naruto’s voice is proud, his eyes sparkling. “She’s got guts.”

Rock Lee chimes in, with a sidelong glance. “She’s a lot like you.”

Sakura’s voice is teasing, scratching along Kakashi’s nerves. “Yeah, I noticed that she’s always watching you, Naruto.”

His neck tingles, and he raises his gaze to Kurenai’s once more, shares a long look with her. 

Averts his gaze once more, just as fast.

 

Down below, Hinata is demolished.

Kakashi feels for her, deeply. And for Kurenai, suddenly insanely glad not to have had to witness something like this with his own genins.

Naruto keeps yelling at Hinata not to give up, making it all worse. And better. 

Kakashi smirks grimly, watching the blood drip to the ground.

 

Hayate declares the fight as finished, with another cough. Neji raises his finger nonetheless, for the final blow.

 

He doesn’t even think about it, jumping down with the other teachers. His hand is on Neji’s arm, thumb pressing into the muscles. He knows he would break it if the Hyuuga should push it, his eye on Guy, who holds Neji back with his arm around his mouth and shoulder. And Kurenai is kneeling before them, holding Neji’s other arm.

Hayate however… Hayate is pointing at Neji’s headband, at the sign under it. 

Kakashi narrows his eyes. That’s a bit of a low blow, isn’t it? Threatening to activate the seal? He frowns. Or were you instructed to do so in case he wouldn’t stop? Did the Sandaime really stoop so low? Or did Hiashi?

Neji vibrates under their hands.

 

And then Naruto is there, rushing to Hinata. “Hinata, are you alright?” He kneels next to her, fretting when she passes out.

Guy lets go of Neji slowly, and Kakashi and Kurenai follow his cue, watching the boy attentively. 

Neji ignores them, eyes flashing at Naruto, his tone icy heat. “You’re such a failure.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, definitely ticked off by the sheer viciousness in the statement. Naruto rears up, preparing to strike Neji and Kakashi has only half the mind to stop him, but Rock Lee is faster, telling Naruto to wait. That he will be able to, later. 

Officially.

 

And then Naruto does something that sends another shiver down Kakashi’s spine, another premonition echoing through his soul.

 

He draws his fingers through Hinata’s blood on the floor, and holds his fist up to Neji, the blood dripping from it. “I give you my word… I vow to win.”

 

I vow to win.

 

Kakashi shivers, looking up at Iruka, who is staring down, a weird expression on his face. You feel it too, don’t you? This… aura that surrounds him? These pieces of fate that slot into place? And not only fate that is connected to… me, but…

He blows out his breath, deliberately, watching Naruto walk up to the balustrade once more, not looking back. 

 

His feet feel like they‘re glued to the floor, but there’s nothing he can do now, nothing he can help with. 

And so he follows his… cute little genin, unable to do anything else.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He watches Lee’s fight, with his Sharingan active, wanting, needing to see. 

To witness.

 

The fifth gate, and still Gaara is not defeated.

I am only able to open the second. 

 

He feels with Guy when Gaara crushes bones and muscles, the techniques Lee can employ truly magnificent already. 

 

But he is not as ruthless.

And Lee might never fight again.

 

He closes his eyes for a long moment as Guy hugs Lee, telling him he is a splendid ninja. He feels a movement next to him, reaching out to hold Sakura back. “No. Your presence will only cause him pain now.”

Naruto runs down though, ignoring them both, and Kakashi sighs and pulls his hitai-ate down, jumping after him, reaching to clasp his mouth shut when he starts yelling at the medical team to heal Lee here, now. 

Naruto‘s body presses into his front, shaking. 

 

Kakashi doesn’t dare to think about anything. 

His voice is low, but laced with understanding. “He sacrificed himself to honor the unspoken oath that exists between him and Sasuke, Neji… and even you, Naruto. He risked his life so he might have a chance to fight all of you.”

He lets his arms relax, drop away from holding Naruto. He reaches up to ruffle the messy hair once more, threads his fingers through the still sweaty strands, his voice a whisper. “Don’t forget that.” Don’t forget that Lee wanted this, wanted this so badly he risked everything. You will need to risk it all if you want to reach your goals, too. He swallows.

 

He watches as his old rival stands there, seemingly forlorn, watching Lee being carried away. He grimaces behind his mask, reaching up to clasp Guy’s shoulder, while wishing he could carry some of the pain. There are words of comfort on his tongue, words that have no place, here, now. He swallows them down, lets his understanding color his tone instead. “Guy. We’re in the way. Let’s go… back upstairs.”

Guy nods, his shoulders low. “Yeah.”

 

He turns and slowly walks after Guy, taking the stairs for once.

Naruto is running up already, and running into Kankuro, and Kakashi narrows his eyes at the obvious hostility, hostility far surpassing normal rivalry. We’re supposedly at peace but these three behave like they are on the war path… I should keep an eye on them.

 

He turns and steps behind Sakura again, watching as the last fight concludes, Choji no match for the sound ninja. He looks up at Asuma, who is leaning with his elbows on the railing, his tone flat. “Well, he lost, but I guess I’ll still take him out for barbecue.”

 

Kakashi grins for a moment. Uh huh. The only way to train, huh? His smile turns wistful. I bet you just like to spend time with them. He frowns, wondering if his own distance is warranted. He remembers Jiraiya’s words suddenly, on the roof feeling so long ago already. The bond between Sensei and pupil really is a tight one. He frowns, sighing through his nose. Will it… help or hinder if I let them close? His frown deepens, with a small self-deprecating chuckle. Do I have a choice letting them close?

 

He is drawn out of his thoughts when Sakura asks about Sasuke. He tries to keep his words light. “Don’t worry too much. Whatever happens is up to Sasuke now.” He can see from her expression that this vague statement doesn’t help and he sighs, looking down into the arena for a moment.

Maybe, if I’m real quick… Checking up on him would be good, too. There is something…

He looks back at her. “Sakura, I’m going to step out for a little bit, so listen carefully to the explanations of the final exams for me, okay?”

 

Sakura’s big eyes blink up at him, and then she nods hesitantly and he gives her a quick eye-smile, before flashing away. 

 

 

I’ll be back as fast as I can. 

 

 

 

Notes:

That illness, right… it was part of the reason why Itachi “lost”… (and he intended to lose of course, but would he have done so if he wasn’t sick? It’s even commented on by Kisame in the anime) - I’ve always found it interesting that there were (at least) two ninjas who (then died and) had this mysterious illness, weakening them… and that Itachi (especially) was one of them. 

Chapter 14: A mask of sand and hurt

Notes:

Another long one, almost 10k. Hope you enjoy :)

And: I know in manga and anime it is differently built, but in a “real” world there would have been no way that someone like Kakashi would not have known who the jinchuriki (etc) were. 

Chapter Text

 

 

His neck tingles, right outside the hospital room. 

It’s not as if Anbu are noisy. 

But they do breathe. 

 

And he had asked for a whole squad. 

 

It’s simply too quiet. 

 

He activates his sharingan once more, behind the hitai-ate, vibrations of shadow and light echoing up to him. He breathes out, halts his breath. 

Eases into the room. 

 

The attack comes, immediate, precise. 

And a voice, happily pushing a finger into the proverbial wound. “Next time you should probably ready 10 guards.”

 

Kakashi gnashes his teeth.

You knew didn’t you? You knew how many you would need to take out.

And there is only one person who knew Sasuke was here after I took him away. 

And who knew what I asked for as protection.

 

Fuck. 

 

Kakashi glowers at the man, his finger around the scalpel twitching. “Just shut up and answer my questions.”

Kabuto’s glasses flash as he turns his head just slightly. “And what if I refuse?”

Kakashi snarls behind his mask. Yes, turn away from Sasuke just a bit more… “I’m the one asking the questions here, show some respect.” No reaction, and he finally asks the question he already knows the answer to, deep in his gut. “Are you in league with Orochimaru?” He bites his tongue not to ask for Danzo.

 

Not yet. If I ask you and you really are in league with him… he will be warned if you get away. But I know you are in league with Orochimaru - you make my skin crawl, just like he does.

 

Kabuto snickers, his voice a hiss. “If you arrest me here, right now, you might never be able to prove my connection to Orochimaru… I won’t break under your interrogations. But… I don’t really like confrontations.”

He’s really going to flee. Kakashi narrows his eyes, shifts his stance. Answers Kabuto’s request to let him go with pulling out a kunai. “You know of the laws of this village, how spies are dealt with.”

He’ll try to distract me. He lets a bunshin flare up, outside the door.

Kabuto shifts.

 

Kakashi springs into action, just as the kunai flashes towards Sasuke’s throat. He kicks Kabuto’s arm away, and then jabs his hand into Kabuto’s throat, the kunai whirring through the air. There is a movement off to the side, one of the Anbu trying to flee. He switches places with his doppelgänger, pretends to be unimpressed, cutting the escape-route off. 

What now. Will you actually fight me?

 

The masked Anbu looks back and forth between him and his bunshin, and then throws himself backwards, and out of the window. Kakashi jumps forward, after him, the man taking the mask off while he falls - revealing Kabuto. 

 

Dammit. 

 

Kakashi watches as he flashes away, his thoughts churning. He got away. And he got away because he went out of his way to trick me, yes, but also knew HOW to trick me. 

He looks back at the bodies in the room, bends down to lift the hood off the person he took down. I see. Shikon no jutsu. He reanimated the corpse and hid himself among them, using his surgical skills to make the face of the body he used resemble him. A three-way deception which would even put the Undertaker squad to shame… He snarls quietly behind his mask, frowning heavily, the words loud in the small room. “If such a person works for Orochimaru… At this rate I’ll be obsolete soon.”

 

The thought is almost funny. 

I’m 26… and yet almost obsolete. Something forged in the olden times. He inhales deeply. Something stuck in the past, and stuck in the old structures. He looks at the broken window. I wonder if those structures will be demolished and broken up by them, just like that window. 

He sighs, looking back down to the floor for a moment, glumly. And he likes wearing masks, too.

 

He turns and quietly leaves the room, closes the door behind himself to keep others out, and signals for one of the nurses to call for the Sandaime, before returning to Sasuke, quietly guarding him, though he is quite sure that Kabuto won’t risk coming back, not now.

And Sasuke slept through it all, utterly exhausted. 

 

It doesn’t take long.

But it feels like forever.

 

 

It’s one of the rare instances where Kakashi concurs with the Hokage, the vicious curse that drops off the Sandaime’s lips at his short report echoing in his own mind, too.

The Sandaime’s voice is dark. “They really do want the Uchiha boy.”

“Mhhh hmm.” Kakashi shrugs, hands in his pockets. 

The Hokage shoots him a dark look, tilting his head to the dead Anbu whose face has been altered. “What kind of mask did he wear?”

Kakashi shrugs again. “Just the Anbu mask and then his own face. He used two bunshin, with different appearances.” A triple deception, masterfully executed. With a mask made of flesh. 

“Hmm.” Hiruzen turns to him, the eyes glittering. “You are unsettled.”

Kakashi sighs through his nose. “I had a run-in with Orochimaru earlier. And Danzo.”

 

There is a small pause, in which you could hear a pin drop. Even the Anbu guard squad that came with the Sandaime does hold its breath. Kakashi sees lilac hair shifting and sighs, heavily, knowing Yugao knows he’s probably getting a dressing down now.

The Sandaime’s voice is too soft. “Leave us.”

Kakashi grimaces behind his mask, waits obediently till the Anbu guards have left the room. Probably taking up station just outside, listening though. He smirks grimly. It’s what I would have done. 

Hiruzen shakes his head, stepping up to him, with his hands clasped behind his back. “Why didn’t you tell me?” 

Kakashi weighs his head. “The exams were on and Orochimaru seemed… awfully interested not to truly engage me.” Not wanting to risk getting caught. He grimaces. “Danzo came by after, also interested in Sasuke. I called the squad to protect this room.”

He swallows. “Whatever Orochimaru is planning did not involve force.” He hesitates for a moment, before adding the word that tastes like bile. “Yet.” He sighs, deeply. “Kabuto has hinted that he may be connected to him.”

Or… is that another trap? The easy connection? What if you’re actually working for Danzo? What if you weren’t sent to abduct or kill Sasuke? What if you were only here for the eyes?

“I see.” Hiruzen stares down onto Sasuke for a long moment, before sighing. “Still, his plans have cost us, already.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, looking back and down at the Anbu in the back corner. One he had known. “Yes.” He swallows, feeling very tired suddenly, and in desperate need of something… positive. Something golden. “I need to go back.”

The Sandaime frowns. “The exam is over.”

 

The vicious bout of self-hatred is a jab to his guts. Great. And I was probably the only Sensei who wasn’t there to congratulate them. 

To hug them.

 

I hope Iruka was. 

 

Kakashi grimaces, forcing his mind to return to the order of before. “How long do I have to train Sasuke?”

The Hokage clicks his tongue. “One month.”

Damn. That’s not long. He nods once. “I see.”

Hiruzen sighs, and then tilts his head, reaching out to smooth a non-existing wrinkle from the bedding. “He needs to rest though still. At least for a few days.” He shoots a look at Kakashi. “Jiraiya is here. Why don’t you go and meet him at that shabby restaurant he so likes.”

Kakashi frowns, looking down at him. “I… thank you.” No dressing down after all? He’s not sure whether he should be relieved or worried. He turns to leave, but the soft words stop him.

“Kakashi, I know that my decisions are often not to your liking.” 

Kakashi grimaces, not daring to comment.

 

The Hokage turns just slightly, shooting him a sly look, his voice carrying his amusement. “The world changes, rapidly, but we are very slow to change. Sometimes we fall behind, or take a turn in our development that grates with reality. And our goals.” He hesitates, and Kakashi tries not to move, somehow feeling as if any sudden move would break this… spell.

The Sandaime tilts his head, continuing. “I know Konoha is now a very different place than it would have been under the Yondaime.” He shrugs, before turning back to the window. “We all just do what we think best, at any given time.”

Kakashi blinks, staring at his back. What are you trying to tell me, Sandaime-sama.

The Hokage tilts his head back, just slightly. “Dismissed.”

 

Kakashi blinks and then leaves the room, pulling the door shut, his mind a static.

What the hell was that ?

 

Yugao pulls him from his jumbled thoughts, with a hand on his arm. “Senpai, forgive me…”

“Mhh?” He gives her an eye-smile, still lost in thought. 

She tilts her masked head. “I just wanted to let you know. Your team… I mean your other two genins… Sensei Iruka took them for ramen.”

He closes his eyes for just a moment, opening his mouth to thank her, but is interrupted when Hayate rushes down the corridor, his breath labored, interrupted by coughs.

 

Kakashi silently steps to the side, watching as Hayate almost barrels into Yugao, clasping her in an embrace that looks painful.

Kakashi swallows. She’s one of the few active Anbu, despite being bonded… I wonder how she does it. I know Hayate refused to join after all.

Yugao giggles, and then sobers, returning the embrace for a long moment, before admonishing Hayate, just slightly, while her fingers keep playing with his hair. “Hayate, I’m on duty.”

Hayate shakes his head, totally ignoring Kakashi. “I heard that someone took out an Anbu squad, I just…” He drops off, shivering, and then coughing heavily, before lowering his head onto her shoulder for a long moment.

Yugao shifts, her embrace turning more intimate, aligning, holding Hayate gently. With a sigh.

 

Kakashi stares at them, quite rudely, for a long moment, and then turns to leave, silently, his heart beating in his throat.

 

 

Yearning.

 

Terribly.

 

 

He tries to push the feeling down, away, shove it back where it came from, while taking measured steps towards the exit.

Knowing it’s no use. 

 

Unable to not want to though. 

 

 

And then his voice is there, calling out. Easing something within Kakashi. 

At first, Kakashi thinks he’s hallucinating.

 

 

But no, Naruto’s voice is indeed calling out, loudly, there in the reception area. Demanding to be able to see Sasuke.

 

The longing intensifies for a moment, and then ebbs a bit, and Kakashi tries to not feel it too deeply, allow it to spread too far. He pushes his hands deep into his pockets. 

Grips the cloth. 

 

He clears his throat, tries to make his voice stern. “Naruto. You’re in a hospital. Be quiet!”

Naruto’s head swivels round, his dirty little face lighting up, with a wide smile. “Oh, Sensei Kakashi!” He grins, running up to Kakashi, and for a moment Kakashi thinks he’ll hug him, but he stops right in front of him, vibrating with excitement. “I need a favor.”

Ah yes, I bet I know what kind of favor. He holds up his hand, a bit resigned. “Stop right there.” Before I can change my mind. “I already know what you’re about to ask, so I’ve found someone to oversee your training.” Alright, Iruka did, but that’s none of your business.

 

Naruto blinks up to him, disappointment obvious in his tone. “I want you to train me, Sensei Kakashi.”

I know. Kakashi swallows, tries to keep his tone neutral. “I have other things going on.” Other things I have to do. Have been ordered to do. “I… couldn’t give you my full attention.” And that would not help you. 

Naruto stares at him, and then harrumphs, crossing his arms. With that pout. “Let me guess - you’re training Sasuke, right?”

Clever boy. Kakashi sighs quietly. “Now, now, don’t complain. I’ve found an even better teacher than me.” And Ebisu. He quirks an eyebrow, watches as namely that ninja enters the hospital, obviously having hurried after Naruto, if the slightly wild look in his eyes is anything to go by. Kakashi smirks to himself. I bet Naruto ignored Iruka after the ramen, and ran off to check on Sasuke, right? And Iruka sent you here. 

 

Ebisu stops right behind Naruto, answering the unspoken question hanging in the air, a bit theatrically. “It is I.”

Naruto turns, and stops and then exclaims, loudly. In an accusing tone. “Hey! You’re… super perv!”

Kakashi blinks. Super… perv? He wonders for a split second what exactly Ebisu might have done, to warrant that title in Naruto’s mind. Given my own preoccupation with certain books, and Naruto’s henge… it must have been something else. 

He cannot help himself, he has to ask. “Sensei Ebisu… a super perv?”

Naruto turns to him, still pouting, now with a decidedly pissed undertone. “Why would you chose a loser like that to be my trainer? Besides this guy is weaker than me. Come on. I mean one time he even fell for my harem technique and he…”

Ebisu starts, blushing furiously, and then rushes forward, clasping Naruto’s mouth shut. “Don’t say that.”

 

Kakashi has a bad, bad feeling, and one that is totally unrelated to his instantaneous dislike of Ebisu putting his hand onto Naruto’s mouth. He tries to sound only vaguely interested. “Harem technique?” That’s a new one?

Ebisu laughs, loudly, fake. “Um, um, it’s nothing, haha.” He turns to whisper something into Naruto’s ear and Kakashi groans quietly to himself. So, I wonder if Ebisu is one of those that Iruka told me about, who passed out. But he cannot help but tease, wanting to see Sensei Ebisu squirm. “Wow, I didn’t know you two knew each other.”

Ebisu releases Naruto, pats his head, voice still too loud, fake. “Haha, well, opposites attract, or…”

Naruto turns his face away, sullen. “This stinks.”

Ebisu’s voice takes an indignant tone. “Indeed. If it weren’t for Kakashi’s request I would never choose to teach you.”

 

Reaaaallllllyyyy. Kakashi narrows his eyes, his dislike intensifying, but holds up his hands, in an appeasing gesture. “Hey, both of you, please…” He sighs, addressing Naruto. “Naruto, Sensei Ebisu is a private tutor who teaches the elite. He’s a special jonin.” Very special apparently. “He’s a better teacher than me, I promise.” At the very least he has vastly more experience teaching. He tries to mellow Naruto down a bit. “And, well, Naruto, among the three genin of team 7… you’re the weakest at the basics. This time, listen closely and learn it right.”

Naruto’s yell is instant, definitely indignant. “Whoa there - compared to Sakura and Sasuke, how in the world do I come up short?”

Kakashi grins behind his mask, but raises his eyes to Ebisu, with a shrug. 

 

Ebisu pushes up his glasses, as always with his middle finger. Kakashi wonders if he does that on purpose. “Naruto, upon obtaining information from Sensei Kakashi and conducting my analysis, I believe that your chakra control is in need of improvement.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. It’s not as if that isn’t correct - but he also knows that this is nothing that Ebisu will be able to fix. Still, it’s good he’s already determined the problem. 

He watches for a moment as Ebisu pulls out some diagrams, starts explaining the way Naruto wastes his chakra to him. He watches Naruto’s face fall, watches as some of the …glow fades. 

He cannot help himself, he has to interject. “There were times that you were better than Sasuke or Sakura, because out of the three of you - you happen to have the extraordinary stamina.” He looks down into Naruto’s eyes, watches as some of the defiant pride returns, the stubbornness that propels the boy forward, against all odds. Though he does pull a face. 

Kakashi smirks softly behind his mask. He looks up at Ebisu. “Well then, Sensei Ebisu, thank you.” If all goes well, you won’t be his teacher for very long. He returns his gaze to Naruto, while stepping off to the side. The words feel way too true in his mouth. “I’m… sorry to abandon you like this, Naruto”, he pauses, silently reflecting on his choice of words, “but you have so much untapped potential…” So, so much. You have no idea how much. He swallows. 

 

He watches as Naruto follows Ebisu, shoulders low, head low, looking a bit like a beaten dog.

 

I’m sorry, Naruto. 

I promise, I’ll make it up to you.

 

In fact, I’m on my way to make that happen right now.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Kakashi!”

 

Kakashi grins, a real grin, aimed at the also enthusiastically grinning Sannin, who is raising from his seat to hug him, impulsively and tightly, making some of the broken pieces in Kakashi slot together, the influx of relaxed positive emotion almost bringing tears to Kakashi’s eyes.

“Jiraiya-san. How long has it been? It is so good to see you.” He swallows, meaning it from the bottom of his heart. Jiraiya hums and then releases him, with a pat onto his back.

Kakashi sits down across the table at the back of that shabby restaurant, watches the mobile face with the glittering alert eyes across from him, smirking at him.

Jiraiya’s voice is a rumble. “A year now? Time flies.” He chuckles, with a bit of a sad undertone. “I’ve been busy, I’m sorry.”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No, I understand.” He swallows. “I heard rumors.” He has heard rumors. Of Jiraiya making a ruckus in women’s bath houses… and of powerful ninja in black cloaks making the rounds. Of other, high level ninja disappearing without trace, especially if the price in the bingo book is high. Of other villages starting to be… worried. 

The Sandaime had called all high-level ninjas of Konoha in before the exams, had told them to watch out. To be careful. So yes. He’s heard.

He wonders how many of those… missing are missing because of Jiraiya. 

If it’s all… or none.

 

Jiraiya nods silently, his white hair shifting. He lowers his voice, his eyes flitting around for a moment, likely scanning, before returning to Kakashi. “The organization I’m tracking is starting to map out villages with a bijou. And they hunt bingo book ninjas down to get at the prize on their head, probably to finance their organization.”

Kakashi blinks, vaguely surprised at the more than direct information. The likely s-class, only-for-Hokage-level information. He clicks his tongue. “I see.”

Jiraiya hums, his eyes boring into Kakashi’s, felt even through the hitai-ate. “You’re probably wondering why I’m telling you so freely.”

Kakashi shrugs, a bit peevishly. “I… yes, I did. That’s classified information I bet.”

Jiraiya nods again, before reaching for his sake, with a sigh. “It is.” He takes a sip. “It’s one of those rare instances where I concur with my Sensei”, he heavily emphasizes the word, and then chuckles, “who, I can tell you, is just as worried as I am.” He pauses a moment, grimacing. “But with Naruto bonded to you, you have to be in the loop.”

Kakashi’s throat is dry. “Loop?” He debates pouring himself a glass of sake too, but isn’t in the mood for alcohol. 

Jiraiya silently signals for tea, obviously noticing his look. “Itachi is on his way here. I believe Hiruzen told you about his visits to towns with a bijou?”

Kakashi nods, working his jaw for a moment. “Yes. I wouldn’t have expected though for… him to be sent here.”

Jiraiya hums, weighing his head. “Sent… or insisted on coming.”

Kakashi blinks. “You think he wants to see Sasuke.”

Jiraiya nods, but waits a moment, until the tea is served, silently nodding his thanks before returning his attention to Kakashi. “Yes. I think it would be wise to remove Sasuke from the village for the time being.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, looking away for a moment. He tries to keep his voice neutral. “I’ve been… asked to teach chidori to Sasuke.”

Jiraiya is silent for a long second, swirling his sake in his glass. His tone is almost kind. “Son of a bitch.”

Kakashi clears his throat, silently concurring. “I guess that can be done outside the village though.” 

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow, downing his sake. “And you want me to teach Naruto?”

Kakashi nods, watching the steam rise from the tea. “I have already trained genjutsu with Sakura, Sensei Sora is going to work on it a bit more with her. Though she didn’t reach the third round, so it’s not as urgent.”

Jiraiya’s eyes light up. “Sora-san’s here? Ahhh, I have to go meet her.”

Kakashi looks up at him, his voice hard. “After teaching Naruto.”

 Jiraiya’s eyes flash. “Is that so.” He chuckles softly, looking at Kakashi for a long moment. Kakashi tries not to squirm. “You’re… attached.”

 

Kakashi scoffs. “Of course I’m attached.” He looks away, willing his ears to stop burning. “We wanted to adopt him, remember.” A felt lifetime ago.

Jiraiya raises his finger, and waves it in front of Kakashi’s face. “Nuh uh, no can do, that is something new, I can see it in your eyes. Well, eye.” He chuckles. “What happened?”

Kakashi clears his throat, firmly staring at the wall behind Jiraiya. “Just life, I guess.”

“Annnnd?” Jiraiya leans a bit forward, and Kakashi gives him the skunk eye, his voice rough. “And nothing. He’s…” He gesticulates, before heaving a big sigh, deflating a bit. Sunshine, and life, and promise and future, and… impossible.

 

He swallows. “Earlier I had a little run in with Orochimaru.” Jiraiya perks up a bit, his eyes watchful, but he stays silent, watching. Listening to what Kakashi doesn’t say. Kakashi sighs again. “And I had a choice to… lay my life on the line for the off chance to make enough noise and engage him enough to… hopefully drive him out, but…” He trails off, suddenly feeling vaguely ashamed. 

Jiraiya’s voice is very soft. “But?”

Kakashi blinks rapidly, his voice a whisper. “But I… longed.”

“And?”

Kakashi sniffs, forcing himself to look up to Jiraiya, his throat clicking. The words are hard to shape. “And I realized I like him. Really, really like him. Not in… that way. In… some fashion. Enough, not to want to… “ Die. He blinks, looking away again.

Jiraiya’s hand comes up, clasps around his neck. Shakes him, just a bit. “That’s a good thing, Kakashi.”

Kakashi’s laugh is caustic, painful. “Yeah? How so.” It’s definitely bad for my duties.

Jiraiya tilts his head, the heat from his hand searing through Kakashi. His voice is a rumble, too gentle to be comforting. Too kind to heal, cutting deep. “Because your wish to join your team is not healthy. And doesn’t bring you the peace you so long for. Because your mask of hurt needs to come off, at some point.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, wills the pain to ebb, flow away, but it is no use, the words twisting sharply within him. Bleeding from him.

Jiraiya’s grip tightens. “Once, you allowed for Iruka to heal a small part of you. Allow this feeling to spread now, too. Let it shape you. Let it evolve. There is no rush.” He shakes Kakashi again, just a bit. “And honestly, how could anybody not love the boy when they get to know him? He is Kushina’s and Minato’s after all.”

Kakashi snorts, a tear dropping, and he wipes it away with a shaking hand. 

Jiraiya withdraws his hand, slowly, and Kakashi misses it, immediately. 

 

They are silent for a minute, the noises from the street outside a background that soothes somehow. Reality, there, just out of reach.

Jiraiya takes up his glass of sake again, his tone almost neutral once more. “So. You and Iruka. No hunting down and killing me necessary?”

Kakashi’s mouth twitches in a little, almost instinctual smile. “No. I guess not. We…” He frowns. Talk. We… talk. He shakes his head once. “I think we might manage to be able to be friends at some point.”

Jiraiya looks at him, a small smile on his lips. “Good.”

Kakashi clears his throat. “Yeah.” He takes a big sip of his tea. Taps his finger against the cup. “Iruka thinks that Orochimaru might have done something to Naruto’s seal in round two of the exams.”

Jiraiya tilts his head. “Round two?”

Kakashi sighs. “They sent them to the woods. Survival, scroll retrieval. You know. Orochimaru sought them out, put a curse mark on Sasuke.” He grimaces. “I was sealing it when I had my run in with him. And then one of his… allies tried to kidnap Sasuke.”

Jiraiya looks away, before snorting, once. “I bet that is why Orochimaru isn’t in that organization anymore.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “You think Itachi could take him down?” Wanting to protect Sasuke?

Jiraiya smirks darkly. “I bet.” He sighs, his gaze returning to Kakashi. “So, how much time do we have?”

“To teach them?” Jiraiya nods and Kakashi sighs. “Four weeks.”

Jiraiya’s eyes darken a bit. “That’s not much. I sincerely doubt I can teach him Rasengan in that time.” 

Kakashi snorts, remembering his own months of training that particular jutsu. “I guess not.”

Jiraiya hums, his gaze faraway, probably going through his mind for a suitable jutsu. 

Kakashi watches him silently for a moment, before asking. “You have mastered sage mode, have you not?”

Jiraiya weighs his head, his gaze sharp on Kakashi’s. “More or less. With some help. Minato did though, even though he didn’t use it often. He focused on his flying hiraishin style instead.” 

Kakashi holds their gaze, quirking an eyebrow. “The contract with the toads does come with a lot of advantages.” 

Jiraiya’s voice is dry, though Kakashi can see his mind churning. “And with disgusting food.”

Kakashi hums. “Naruto can do hundreds of kage bunshin. I have seen it.”

Jiraiya raises his head, his gaze sharp now. “I… see.” He tilts it. “That may be something to work with, later.”

Kakashi nods. “Yes.” He swallows. “Senjutsu would be perfect for him, with those chakra reserves. Imagine if…”

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow. “You think he could tame the fox to blend it?”

Kakashi shrugs. “Maybe? Someday?”

Jiraiya puts his cup down, taps his finger on the table, twice. “If I contract him with the toads now, we could start training Kuchiyose no Jutsu. Senjutsu can follow at some later time.”

Kakashi nods again. “Yes. I don’t know how much good the summoning would bring him in the exams, but in the long run…”

Jiraiya looks away, and then nods. “In the long run, it could very much be a life-savior.” He chuckles. “If he manages to summon a decent toad that is.”

Kakashi grunts. “Yeah well, with Naruto all the bets are off.”

Jiraiya shoots him a look. “That bad?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. Fondly. “He’s a maverick.” And that’s an understatement. 

Jiraiya smiles sharply. “Good.” He empties his sake and then cracks his knuckles. “Well then, I guess I have some watching to do. I need to see what the boy can do and what he responds to first before engaging.”

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head. “Well, it will please you to hear then, that Ebisu-san took him to the bathhouses to train standing on water.”

“Oh?” Jiraiya’s face lights up. “That’s interesting? He could have done that at the lakes?”

Kakashi leans back, sighing. “Uh huh. But I think Ebisu and Naruto have some kind of history with Naruto’s sexy jutsu, and I bet he wanted to make sure not to be seen.”

Jiraiya blinks, his tone a bit off. “Sexy… jutsu.”

Kakashi shakes his head, glowering at him, before sighing again. “Just… let him show you at some point.”

Jiraiya stares at him for a moment, before grinning broadly. Saucily. “Alright.”

Kakashi gives him a skunk eye. “Pervert.”

Jiraiya spreads his arms, his tone fake-hurt. “But I need inspiration for the books you so love?”

Kakashi blushes, deeply, trying to keep glowering, but there’s a laugh somewhere in his voice. “We’re both perverts then.”

Jiraiya stands up, leans close for a moment. “I’ll tell you a little secret - we’re all perverts. Everyone is.” He withdraws, cackling. “That’s why these books are so successful!”

 

Kakashi snorts and watches him leave, relaxing just the tiniest bit.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He is on his way back to the hospital to check on Sasuke when he sees Iruka hurry up to him, and he slows his steps, to let him catch up more comfortably. 

Iruka shoots him a small smile in thanks, his gaze open and … seeing.

Kakashi averts his own, looks at the street instead. 

Iruka sighs next to him, his tone light. Too light. “I’ve been looking for you.”

Kakashi hums, his spine tingling with questions, incoming. 

Iruka rolls his eyes, pushing. “What was that, earlier? When you returned from taking Sasuke for sealing?”

Kakashi groans quietly, silently cursing anything and everything, while desperately trying to find something to deflect. He grimaces and turns to a small alley, waits until they’re alone in a dark corner. Once upon a time we would have made out in a space like this… The thought is bittersweet. He sighs in defeat. “I had a run in with Orochimaru.”

Iruka blinks. “And?” He grimaces, raising his hands and trying to backpedal. “I mean, I’m glad you’re here, safe and sound and…” Kakashi glowers at him and Iruka sighs, deeply, the apology shivering in his tone. “Sorry.” He raises an accusing finger. “ But I know that is not what had you so unsettled.”

Kakashi groans, letting his head fall back against the wall, his tone dry, without heat. “I hate you.”

Iruka chuckles, warmly. “Spill.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, sighing. “I…” He debates saying it as he told it to Jiraiya, but it somehow doesn’t feel right, not for Iruka, who knows him so well. Too well, almost. “I realized that…”, he clears his throat, pushing the words out, “that I’m starting to… really care for the little rascal, I guess, and that I’m unwilling to sacrifice myself so easily anymore.” There, I said it. Or something close to it. He closes his eyes, unable to look at Iruka, feeling more than vaguely guilty.

 

Who steps up to him, hugging him tightly. His breath tickles through the cloth of the mask. “I’m so glad, Kakashi.”

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, turns his face into the embrace, drawing big gulps of the smell he so loves in. His voice is wobbly. “You are?”

Iruka chuckles, shifting to let their embrace settle, align. Feel natural. His hand comes up to gently play with the hair in Kakashi’s neck. “Of course, baka. I want you to be happy.”

Kakashi exhales shudderingly, his arms coming round to hold fast for a moment. Realizing that, despite echoing many an embrace that led to other things, this embrace feels… good. Only good. 

But good.

 

Kakashi presses a clothed kiss under Iruka’s ear, whispering. “I want us both to be happy.”

Iruka draws back, just a bit, to look at him. “We will be.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, silent, while staring at the ground. I wish.

Iruka reaches up, tilts Kakashi’s jaw up to make him look at him. “I do believe so.” He narrows his eyes, a stern note entering his tone. “If need be, I’ll believe for both of us.”

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head. You’re too good for me. Always have been.

 

Iruka steps back, gently, carefully separating them. His voice is gentle. “Where are you going?”

Kakashi exhales, nodding to the general direction of the hospital. “To tell Sasuke where to meet me if he wants to learn a new jutsu.” Don’t ask me which one, please.

Luckily Iruka doesn’t. He nods and then frowns. “You’ll be busy then till round three?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Probably. I’ll go and pack some rations, and then I’ll go to train.” Him and… myself. With Itachi coming here… He grimaces behind his mask.

Iruka nods again, shrugging once. “Wanna go for dinner before?”

Kakashi looks at him, blinks, and then shrugs once, too. “Yeah, why not?”

Iruka grins, and Kakashi snorts, shaking his head at him.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

The rocky desert he chose for his training with Sasuke is on the way to the Wind territory, the plateau he showed Sasuke on the map high on the rocks overlooking the grassy plains leading further into the Fire’s territory.

His right hand fingers hurt, where they grip the rock surface tightly.

He frowns, willing his grip to stay. I have to increase my stamina. It’s unacceptable to be exhausted as fast as I was on the Land of Waves mission. He grimaces, lifting his foot to find another nook to place it in. The thoughts are a bit dark. This rock climbing exercise shouldn’t be so strenuous… ugh I really let my body get weak. Is there… enough time left?

He blinks, the thought that the time is over for Hayate already an uncomfortable one. What happened there… He grimaces again. What did you hear? His eyes unfocus for a moment, as his tattoo tingles softly, and Kakashi blinks, his thoughts turning to Yugao. I’m so sorry, Yugao. 

 

He knows that Yugao has asked to be relieved, but that the Sandaime has declined her request, for now. He knows that Yugao has taken to sit in the spot that Hayate died. 

Sometimes practicing their jutsu, whirling the sword in moonlit nights. 

He knows she is not talking anymore, grieving silently. 

He knows she debates following Hayate.

 

The fate of soul-mates separated by death is a harsh one. He swallows harshly, cursing as his foot misses the nook, dangling from the rocks by his right hand fingers only for a long, long moment. If I should lose my grip now… I would fall, too. Likely die. I could try to gather chakra… but the rocks are too uneven, the fall too quick. He blinks. Would you miss me? Would it… feel this bad for you too? Or would it not matter much, because our bond is not fully realized?

He stares at his knuckles, watches as they whiten further under the strain. 

Would I follow you if you should die?

 

He swallows, frowning.

I… do not know. 

 

I don’t know anything anymore.

 

I just don’t know.

 

He blinks and then pulls himself up with a jolt of chakra, jumping up and onto the plateau.

Feels the presence of the boy staring at him. Finally managed to escape the hospital I see. He exhales softly, forcing himself to redirect his thoughts. “Yo… you finally showed up.” 

Almost two weeks late.

 

Sasuke glowers at him. “You’re late, too.”

That’s… debatable. Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, reaching behind his back to untie his hand. “Been waiting long?”

Sasuke’s gaze darkens. “Can we start now?”

Kakashi sighs, clicking his tongue. “Of course.” He pushes the rope into his back pocket, narrowing his eyes. “What did you learn in the tournament?”

Sasuke frowns, his voice petulant. “That I should not use my sharingan?”

Kakashi shakes his head, letting his voice grow stern, almost cold. “Enough. You know the reason for that order. I meant the moves you copied and that you employed. Show me.”

He steps back, leaning against a stone pillar, his arms crossed.

Sasuke glowers at him for a long moment, and then starts to go through the motions of Lee’s Lotus, and the Konoha whirlwind, his motions smooth but unpracticed.

Kakashi lets him go through it all, finishing off with some involuntary twitches, under Kakashi’s intense scrutiny. Not as aloof as you pretend to be, huh.

 He nods once, and then clears his throat. Forcing himself to ask. “Alright. How about a new jutsu.” Sasuke’s dark eyes light up, and Kakashi sighs, quietly. Don’t you dare hurt Naruto with it.

 

He grimaces, and channels lightning in his hand.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The presence is dark, and menacing, full of futile hate.

 

He sighs, quietly correcting Sasuke, ignoring the way his neck itches. “Try not to infuse it with too much chakra. Chidori will drain you real fast if you try to push beyond your limits. You know what will happen if you exhaust it.” He hesitates, frowning for a moment. “Currently, your limit seems to be at two per day. In time, you might be able to push it to four. However, make sure that the base of it is really in the very palm of your hand, not above.”

He lets chidori flare up in his own palm, holding it out to show Sasuke. “See how the most dense part touches the skin? You need to feel the pull of it, the searing heat. Only then can you shape it along the length of your fingers, to be an actual lightning blade.”

He twists his hand, stretching his fingers, lets the lightning stretch with it, dance along his bones. 

 

Sasuke stares at his hand, panting heavily, his hair dusty and matted, his clothes dirty. He grunts, letting the lightning flare up once more, letting it dance in his hand.

Kakashi watches quietly. “Good. Now let it settle.”

Sasuke grits his teeth, bracing against the pain. Yes, this is a two edged sword. It will always hurt you, while it hurts others. Kakashi frowns, watching as the lightning condenses in Sasuke’s palm. Knows the searing jolt of pain as it settles, touching skin and flesh. 

He clicks his tongue. “There. Feel that? That is how it must feel.” Unfortunately.

Sasuke grimaces, his right hand coming up to stabilize his left wrist. 

Kakashi gives him a moment, lets him breathe through it. His tone is still hard, knowing Sasuke doesn’t want it to be kind. “You’ll get used to it. Now stretch your fingers, and let it flow along them. Give it direction.”

Sasuke grunts, hissing with pain. His voice is rough. “Can’t I just wield it in my palm?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “You could. But then you would need to coat all your fingers, and condense a ball of lightning the size of your fist, in order not to break every bone in your hand and arm when you try to punch through something. Letting it be only in your palm is actually the easier alternative.” You’ll probably do that later though.

 

Sasuke grimaces, and then opens his fingers, with a painful snarl. 

Kakashi feels with him. “There. Now let it flow along them.”

Sasuke mewls, low in his throat, his eyes a bit crazed. But, bit by bit, the lightning flares and shapes, takes direction.

Kakashi raises his chin. “Now hit the rock with it.”

Sasuke yells, throwing his whole body into the move, hitting the rock with his hand.

Shards of rock break off, splintering everywhere, while the impact radius leaves a shattered impression circle around the event center. 

 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, feeling slightly sick. “That’s it.” If you punch that through flesh… He sighs, closing his eyes for a moment. In front of him, Sasuke huffs, trying to catch his breath.

Repeating, the words spoken over his shoulder. “That’s it?”

Kakashi nods. “Yes. That is the lightning blade, chidori.” He swallows. “In time you will adapt it to your own needs, add your own modifications to it. Your own strength. You need the sharingan to see where it needs to hit as soon as you start using it with actual speed. Which is what’s needed still for it to be used as a proper weapon.”

Sasuke turns his head back to him, the red eye glinting for a moment. “How much time?”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “Don’t be so greedy, Sasuke. That is a level A jutsu. Your skill with it already surpasses many a ninja.”

Sasuke turns his head back. “Not all though.”

Kakashi sighs quietly. “There’s always bigger fish in the pond.” He steps forward, and around Sasuke, looking down at him. “That goes for you just as it goes for me.”

For example the one behind us.

He locks his gaze with Sasuke, quirks an eyebrow and tilts his head. Sasuke frowns. Kakashi smirks to himself, calling out. “I know you’re there… the bloodlust is radiating off you.” 

Sasuke blinks at him, the sharingan vanishing. 

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Why don’t you come on out?” 

 

There’s a rustling of cloth behind him, and Kakashi turns slightly, pretending to be surprised. “It’s… you….”

Gaara stares at him, his gaze swiveling to Sasuke’s after a moment, the slightly manic expression in them sending a shiver down Kakashi’s spine.

He’s heard of the one-tails jinchuriki of course. The one rumored to be on active assassination request by the Kazekage himself, but who is here, now. Surviving. The one rumored to never sleep, lest the beast breaks its cage. The one leaving a trail of blood and sand in his wake, and who had shown no mercy to Lee, even after his defeat. 

 

The one who is set to fight Sasuke, a few days from now.

 

Gaara tilts his head, silent, his green eyes locked to Sasuke. 

Who shoots a look to Kakashi, shifting from one foot to the other. 

Kakashi narrows his. Red eyes against green. Lightning against sand. Opposites in many ways… but both are desperate to prove themselves. To be worthy. 

He sighs softly, shifting to stand between Gaara and Sasuke, nonchalantly, trying to seem unthreatening. “Mah, mah… have you come to train with us?”

Gaara’s eyes snap to his, sending a shiver down Kakashi’s spine. His voice grates. “I want to kill him.”

Kakashi shifts his stance, planting both feet firmly on the rock. He gives Gaara an eye-smile. “And you’ll have your chance, soon.” He tilts his head. “Even though the exams aren’t supposed to be to the death, but I’m sure you know that.”

Gaara stares at him, wildly. There is some… wonder in the voice. “But what sense makes it then, to fight?”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, while Sasuke harrumphs behind him, stepping to the side to look around Kakashi. Kakashi grimaces. Dammit, Sasuke, stay the heck behind me. He shifts again, blocking Gaara’s view. Feeling Sasuke’s annoyed look. “We fight to test our skills. We will look forward to measure ours against yours.”

Gaara cackles, his green eyes dead. “Your skills are no match for mine.”

Kakashi eye-smiles pleasantly, shrugs. “The match will tell.”

Gaara shivers, looking up at him, his voice a menacing whisper. “Yessssssss….” His head lowers, tilting, to catch a look of Sasuke, and then he turns slowly, walking away in measured steps, the sand trickling from him, swirling around him. Hissing, somehow, his words drifting over to them. “Soon, Uchiha Sasuke.”

 

Kakashi watches him leave, activating his own sharingan for long moments behind the hitai-ate to make sure that Gaara is finally gone before he turns, sighing. 

Sasuke grunts, pretending to be unimpressed, but Kakashi can see him shivering. 

He clears his throat. “Now that you’ve mastered chidori, we have 5 days to make you able to combine it with the exertion of the taijutsu we practiced. And with speed. If you manage to get through his sand armor with chidori, you might be able to defeat him with taijutsu afterwards. Or the other way around. It depends.”

Sasuke pulls a face. “I might?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, feeling very tired suddenly. “Gaara is no normal ninja. He’s wearing a mask of sand and hurt, it’s part of him, part of his make-up. You will have to rip off this mask to defeat him.” He shakes his head once, trying to drive the point home. “He’s strong, Sasuke.” 

Sasuke raises his head, a defiant look on his face. 

Kakashi smirks, his eyes glittering. There’s no way I’ll let him kill you though. His smile turns grim. Time to put you through the paces. Let’s see if you can do a third chidori. “Show me the Lotus, with a chidori at the end, cutting the rock over there.”

Sasuke swallows and then turns, and Kakashi watches him, his neck tingling. For a moment, he thinks he can feel a familiar presence, a familiar aura.

When he turns his head though, there’s nobody there. 

 

Nothing alive, for miles on end. 

 

He stares with his hidden sharingan, knowing they are watched nonetheless.

 

He shivers, his gut knowing who it is. 

 

Damn.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He uses the Dancing Leaves, twirling and appearing right inside the arena with Sasuke. 

Right in front of Naruto.

 

Who is standing next to Nara Shikamaru, his eyes glowing with something exalted, something frolicking. His words are firm, strong, and yet breathless, shivering with anticipation, all rolled into one. “You‘re late. I thought you were afraid of our fight!“

Sasuke grins at him, his dark eyes sparkling. “Baka.”

Kakashi watches them, feels his tattoo burn. Watches as Naruto only has eyes for Sasuke, for long, long moments. The thought is… unpleasant. You’re definitely connected, aren’t you… He frowns, trying to curb the feeling that wants to rise, the je… He stops his own thought, his own recognition of the emotion. That is… impossible. Inappropriate and simply… impossible. He gnashes his teeth. 

Sasuke’s question rips him from his thoughts again, making him feel rather guilty, too. “From that loudmouth attitude of yours… I take it you won your first battle?”

Kakashi blinks. You won against Neji? He swallows. Damn, I would have loved to see that. 

Naruto’s laugh is loud, and infectious, tugging at Kakashi’s soul. His answer is short, proud. “Of course.” He grins, the smudged face exuding such happiness… 

 

Kakashi swallows, redirecting his attention and thoughts with an effort. “Well, flashy entrance not withstanding… don’t tell me Sasuke lost by forfeit?“

The examining ninja, Genma, shakes his head, his tone dry. “We shifted the matches.”

Good. Kakashi sighs gently, looking down at Sasuke. Quips, knowing they were late because he insisted to train until the moves really worked. “See, I told you we’d be late, Sasuke.”

Sasuke rolls his eyes at him, but there is a smirk somewhere in there, too. He looks up into the arena’s balconies, and freezes, his eyes riveted to Gaara, who is turning away to come down to him. 

Naruto’s voice is low. “Don’t you dare to lose against a guy like him.” 

Sasuke’s gaze swivels to him, the wide-eyes stare full of… alert. 

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, holding up his fist. “I want to fight you, too.”

Sasuke snorts, shaking his head once. His eyes change to display resolve, his breath coming easier.

 

Kakashi wants to hug Naruto. Badly.

 

He clears his throat. “Come on, Naruto. Let’s go up.”

Naruto looks up at him, their eyes locking for a moment, and then falls into step next to him, taking the stairs for once. Kakashi looks down at him while walking up, letting the warmth within him spread. Trying to sound inconspicuous. “So, how was your training with Ebisu-san?”

“Pffft.” Naruto waves his hand. “I found someone better to teach me.”

“Oh?” Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, trying to curb his mirth. “Who?”

Naruto pulls a face, gesticulating a bit. “There’s this old geezer, a real pervert, but he’s been showing me some cool stuff.”

Kakashi blinks, hiding his laugh in a cough. “I see. What cool stuff?”

Naruto grins up at him, preening. “Well, you see, he showed me contracts, and I managed to summon this big toad, finally, and we argued, but I mean, I summoned him, so he has to listen to me, right, but he wasn’t too happy about it, so he deposited me at the hospital after I passed out.”

Kakashi blinks, trying to pull the important information from the scrambled report. “A big toad? How big?” And you passed out?

Naruto shrugs. “I don’t know? He smoked a pipe and had a sword, and he had lots of tongue piercings…” His eyes light up. “Can I get one? I want to get one. I bet it’s cool to have one in your tongue.”

Kakashi stops for a moment, staring at him. He … summoned Gamabunta? That… He blinks. “Naruto, describe the size of the toad to me.”

Naruto halts as well, blinking up to him. “Ermmm, I mean, like the arena below, maybe?”

Kakashi blinks. “With piercings.”

Naruto nods, enthusiastically. “Oh yes, I wanna get one.”

Kakashi stares at him, his brain catching up with the statement at last. “Ahhhh, no, no, no, not until you’re grown up.” And I cannot prevent it anymore.

Naruto’s face falls. “Awww man, come on, Sensei. That would be fun, wouldn’t it? I could play with it?” He sticks out his tongue, wiggles it.

 

Kakashi blushes, heavily, trying not to imagine a somewhat older Naruto smiling and showing off a piercing like that, and failing, spectacularly. Heaven help. His voice is gruff. “No, Naruto.” Not even over my dead body.

Naruto groans, harshly. “But it would be fun!!”

Kakashi clears his throat, willing the tips of his ear to stop burning. He has no idea what he is talking about, so get a grip. “You can decide that when you’re a legal adult.”

Naruto grunts. “Great, so only 5 years left.”

Kakashi opens his mouth to respond, closes it again after a moment. His voice sounds weird when he finally presses the words out. “Yeah, only 5 years left.” Five years. You’ve already… managed over 12. That’s… he stares at the blond boy, who turns and continues up the stairs, following him as if in trance. I’ve managed two thirds already. He snorts gently, shaking his head. The thought comes with its own kind of humor. Now comes the hardest test. Puberty. He shakes his head, willing the black-humored mirth down.

 

Naruto stops on the last landing, tilts his head back at him. “Sensei?”

“Hmmm?” Kakashi smiles at him, softly, watching those expressive eyes. I wonder how they’ll look at me when you’re all grown up and aware… will they despise me? Love me? Hate me? His smile turns wistful, painful. I would have hated it, should this have happened to me. He swallows.

Naruto looks to the ground for a moment, before those soulful eyes return to his. “Sensei, why didn’t you train me? And find someone else to train Sasuke?”

Kakashi grimaces, and then exhales, in a rush. Trying to find words that won’t wound. “I trained him because he is a lot like me.”

Naruto blinks. “A lot like you?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “His affinity is lightning, just like mine. He has the sharingan, just like I do.” He has seen his loved ones die, just like I did.

Naruto blinks again, and then smirks, apparently satisfied with this answer. “So I guess that is why I like you both so much.”

He turns and hurries through the door to the balconies, and Kakashi stares after him, not knowing what to feel. 

 

 

A movement to the side draws his attention before he can hurry after Naruto, Yugao stepping out of the shadows. Her voice is rough, obviously unused for a long time. “Senpai.”

Kakashi steps over to her, carefully, gently, looks at the Anbu mask in her hand. Her uniform is dirty, her hair tangled. There are big bags under her eyes, and her eyes stare at him, vacant.

Kakashi swallows the platitudes down, all the little ‘I’m so sorry’s that don’t help, that only keep twisting the knife deeper. He hesitates for a long moment, and then embraces her, pulling her into his arms, gently, unrelentingly.

 

She folds into him, her strong and lithe body seemingly frail, the muscles shivering. He holds her, silently, until the shivering stops, and then takes the mask, pulling it from her limp fingers. 

His voice is soft, just there, between them. “I will take it up with the Sandaime, Yugao. You are hereby relieved of your duty.” He knows he technically doesn’t have the standing nor the authority, but Yugao just nods, stepping back after a moment, her tall frame seeming utterly small. 

 

She raises her eyes to his, her gaze flitting back and forth. “I heard about you and… him.” Her voice breaks on the last word, and she inhales deeply, her gaze turning imploring. “You have to live this, Kakashi, you have to let yourself love him, before it is t…” Her face crumbles, tears falling from her eyes. She holds the sobs in, with an effort, her frame shaking.

He swallows, nodding once, willing his own tears down. He gives her a wavering little smile, knows she can see it despite the mask. “I’ll try.” I’ll… try.

She sniffs, and then nods, turning away, the once powerful ninja fading to the shadows once more, to yearn.

 

Kakashi shivers, the mask in his hand heavy and burning.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He steps out onto the balcony just as the fight below is about to kick off, sharing a look with Guy before stepping up to the railing, behind Sakura. Yugao’s mask feels hot and cold in his fingers, and he puts it away, slowly, the weight of it settling in the bag on his back. 

 

He frowns, wondering where Naruto is, the Nara boy not there either. 

He tilts his head, keeps his voice light. “Yo, Guy. And you too, Lee. Are you alright?”

Sakura’s head swivels round, with a tone that’s between relieved and accusatory. “Sensei Kakashi!”

Kakashi grimaces. Right. “Oh, sorry, sorry. You were worried, weren’t you. Sorry I didn’t keep in touch.” I hope you and Sora had a good time though. I have to ask her. Later.

Sakura looks away for a moment, her voice low. “It’s alright.”

No it’s not. Kakashi sighs, watching the slope of Sakura’s shoulders, the way her face falls. 

She turns her eyes to his for a moment. “Sensei Kakashi… that mark on Sasuke’s shoulder…”

He interjects, gently. “It’s nothing to worry about.” Nothing you can do about it. He gives her a fake eye-smile when she looks at him, sighing softly when she smiles in return. Yes, believe me. Keep your innocence for a while still, Sakura. He looks around, noticing the few Anbu. 

 

His voice is quiet, only for Guy. “Only eight Anbu for this big a stadium? Two squads aren’t enough? What is the Sandaime thinking?” What is happening? And those eight seem… weird somehow. Why are they cloaked?

Guy’s voice is hard but low. “Well… not knowing what the enemy is planning… the Anbu have probably been dispersed and placed at key points in the village.”

Still. Kakashi grimaces, the base of his spine tingling. Something will happen.

He lets his gaze drift, tries to find Tenzou. Where are you?

 

They are silent for a moment, watching Sasuke below go through the taijutsu combinations they practiced. Destroying Gaara’s sand shield. With an effort, but… 

Guy’s voice carries amazement - and recognition.“… Exactly what kind of training did you put him through in that month to hone him to that extent?”

Kakashi grimaces, quirking an eyebrow. Not a month… Just two weeks… and the weeks before that he was still in hospital. He tries to keep his voice neutral. “Sasuke mimicked Lee’s taijutsu once before, so during his taijutsu training I had him visualize Lee’s movements.” He shares a look with Guy, both of them knowing it’s not that easy, the whole process in fact only possible through the Sharingan. “Because Sasuke knew Lee he was able to master those movements. Of course it was extremely difficult.”

 

Guy stares down into the arena, and then raises his eyes to Kakashi, opening his mouth. Kakashi shakes his head minutely, willing Guy to stay quiet. Don’t ask, please. He knows Guy is wondering why he trained so much taijutsu instead of another jutsu. 

I had my reasons. He grimaces. One of them being that I don’t want him to actually be able to be the assassin the Sandaime wants him to be. At least not if I can help it. 

Guy frowns, and then turns his gaze away, his jaw working. 

Kakashi sighs quietly to himself.

 

He watches as Gaara creates a sphere around himself, a protective barrier, designed to keep anything out. Another mask… And now, Sasuke, chidori, fully extended as the blade. He can see Sasuke’s hand twitch.

 

Naruto yells behind him, his voice breathless. “Sensei Kakashi! You have to stop this fight, Gaara is…”

Kakashi turns his head. Gives him an eye-smile. Interjecting gently but firmly. “Well. It’s alright.” Please trust me. “There is a reason we were this late after all.”

Naruto stares at him, momentarily stunned by his nonchalance. 

Kakashi turns his eyes back to the arena, his voice low. Willing Naruto to follow his lead. “You’ll be surprised.”

Sasuke is hopping up the wall, gathering chakra now, the chirping sounds floating up to them. 

Sakura exclaims loudly, and Guy shoots him a look, before explaining haltingly, his expression grim. Not mincing his words. 

Kakashi sighs quietly, hearing the accusation in the tone just fine. Yes, I taught him an assassination technique… I know. 

He grimaces when Guy does indeed call it that, too. He can feel the weight of Naruto’s gaze when Guy tells him that Kakashi invented it. And that he sliced lightning with it, giving it its name.

Kakashi does roll his eyes at the small jab regarding the ‘reckless move’ though, pointedly whispering loudly at Lee, who is standing in front of them, on crutches. “Like you really have the right to criticize me… right, Lee?”

He and Guy glower at each other, for a split second.

 

Kakashi sighs, blinking, the thought what Itachi might do to him if Sasuke would end up like Lee… or worse… a rather uncomfortable one. He lets his eyes glide around the arena, wondering if Itachi might be watching already, his animal hindbrain insisting he felt Itachi’s presence on the plateau, even if his eyes and other senses might not have been able to see him. 

Still. I know you were there.

 

Are you here now, too?

Are you watching?

 

Down below, Sasuke rips his arm from the sphere, and Gaara drops the barrier, after the one-tails tries to reach for Sasuke, sending chills down Kakashi’s spine.

He’s about to say something to Guy, wondering if Itachi might be here for the one-tails, not Naruto, when suddenly the scent of Jasmine fills his nose.

 

Feathers glide down, beautiful and tender.

Sounds dim, the feeling of peace settling.

 

Kakashi’s head swivels around, his gaze locking with Guy’s for a split second. They raise his hands in sync, their words echoing. “Release!”

 

The genjutsu breaks, and Kakashi turns, seeing Sakura concentrate, her little voice piping up with surprising strength. “Release!”

 

 

Kakashi smiles wolfishly behind his mask, insanely proud, knowing that is no small feat, given the powerful jutsu used. 

 

 

 

Very good.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 15: A life for a life

Notes:

That description re Jiraiya’s size? The last panel here had me staring at it for a while, truly realizing how big Jiraiya has been, compared to the others.

And how interesting his body language is here, too, imho. 
(Also, yes, there‘s energy between them. 😈)

And: Not advocating smoking here, but there I felt it fit. 

 

This chapter also marks the point where more and more “other” stuff is added while (also still) staying close to canon. But some of the changes of before will start to unfold now, and bring more changes/stuff with it. 🤗💕

Chapter Text

 

 

 

He helplessly watches as the Sandaime is caught in a barrier, the words grating in his mouth. “There was a ninth traitor… a sand ninja.”

Another one.

 

And still there’s masked ninjas watching.

Where are our Anbu?

 

Guy exclaims loudly, pointing. "Look closely!“

A shudder runs through Kakashi, staring at the figures inside the barrier. Orochimaru. 

 

Kakashi swallows, but he shakes his head and holds out his hand when Guy wants to jump over. "No. The Sandaime isn‘t defeated that easily.“ Not even by one of the Sannin. Especially not by one of the Sannin. He smiles grimly, knowing his words are the utter truth, his personal matters with Sarutobi Hiruzen notwithstanding. "He is the Hokage of Konoha after all.“ He‘ll make them pay.  

 

He swallows harshly, allowing some doubt. I hope. 

Something tickles at the back of his brain, something Sora said. Traitors will always be betrayed by those they betrayed. He shivers, shooting another look up at the barrier. If that is true… What did you do to Orochimaru, Sandaime?

 

His and Guy’s gaze falls down into the arena once more, sees the way Sasuke and Gaara stare at each other. And then Gaara is taken away by his siblings, and Genma talks to Sasuke for a moment, and then Sasuke is off, after Gaara, and Kakashi stares and then curses, viciously, his mind frantic.

Dammit, Genma. 

He is no match for the three of them?

And the bijou… 

 

Two enemies come at Sakura and he snarls, taking them out, and then pastes an eye-smile on, hanging upside down from the ceiling, while trying not to scare her too much. “Sakura, stay there for a little while. I’ll… go thin out the enemy ranks.”

 He shoots a look at the snoring Naruto, and then over at the pretending-to-sleep Shikamaru. 

I wonder…

Are they ready? 

 

Do I… have a choice?

 

He rushes around the space, clearing it rather matter of factly, three enemies not fast enough to get away, another hastily retreating. 

He lets the man go, and then drops down next to Sakura again, pasting another eye-smile on. Sees her eyes swivel to the blood stains everywhere on his uniform and back. Her gaze is wide still, and frightened, but there is something in it he recognizes, too, something he has seen before, on the bridge.

 

He smirks for a split second, keeps his voice gentle. "Why don’t you wake Naruto and Shikamaru and then go after Sasuke to help him?“ He looks to the side for a moment, where Guy slams an enemy into the wall. Leaving a messy, red imprint. His eyes glide over all the slumped bodies on the balconies. We cannot leave all these people unprotected. But… He sighs, and then makes his voice firm, deciding. "There seems to be lots of Sand and Sound ninja in the village. But a small team of four won‘t raise much suspicion, and I have faith in you.“

I have to trust in all of you. 

Sakura blinks up at him. "Four?“

He nods, and then bites his thumb, planting it on the back of a sleeping villager. "Kuchiyose no Jutsu!“ The smoke clears, and Pakkun yawns at him, but his eyes are alert. "Boss?“

Kakashi nods curtly, but answers Sakura. "Pakkun will track Sasuke for you.“ He will call the rest of the pack if need be. "Follow Sasuke, bring him back. Wait and hide somewhere, after.“

Sakura stares at him, her big green eyes unblinking. 

 

An explosion in the distance, and the ground shakes. There’s swishes in the air as several Anbu obviously jump towards the source. Kakashi’s jaw works. Finally. Where have you been?

Kakashi exhales, tries to convey the importance with his tone. "Now, Sakura. Wake Naruto and Shikamaru, and follow Pakkun through the hole over there.“ He tilts his head to a collapsed part of the wall and shares a look with Pakkun, who nods, once. 

Sakura gulps and then something hard intensifies in her eyes and she crawls over to Naruto, keeping her head low. Kakashi‘s hand clears her path, the sudden influx of enemies truly astounding. Is someone directing them? He watches with sidelong glances as Naruto is roused, Shikamaru pulling an annoyed face. 

 

For a moment his eyes catch with blue, but then Naruto blinks, and the three genin and the little dog are gone and Kakashi’s heart cramps once, viciously, as the noise of the world returns. 

Be careful. 

All of you. 

 

Guy falls into a crouch next to him, panting a bit. "Do you think they‘ll be alright?“

Kakashi nods, his voice firmer than he feels. "Pakkun’s with them. If they don’t push too much…“ He frowns. “Where’s Lee and the others?”

Guy tilts his head towards the exit, voice grim. “I released them and sent them off. They’ll do us no good, standing in our way, especially with Lee wounded.”

Kakashi nods.

 

A shadow falls over them, coming with the scent of tobacco and a vision of red eyes, seeing it all. 

He sighs a breath of relief, addressing the beautiful kunoichi. "Kurenai. So good to have you here. Can you release all these people? We need to get them to the shelters.“

Kurenai nods and then concentrates, her eyes burning for a moment, the pulse of chakra she sends out feeling like a punch to the stomach. 

Guy gives her a thumbs up, and then starts to direct those villagers that have woken by the first pulse to the exits, herding them along in the general direction of the mountain shelters. 

 

Kakashi turns to do the same, but a big hand on his shoulder stops him. 

Asuma sounds vaguely unsettled. "You sent him off? With Shikamaru?“

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, looking down into the arena for a moment, knowing well how attached Asuma is to the Nara boy. "I told them to stay out of everything, to just track Sasuke and bring him back.“ 

Asuma tilts his head. "Who is where?“

Kakashi sighs. "Genma sent him after Gaara.“

Asuma hisses a curse, his dark eyes on Kakashi’s for a split second, understanding and awareness shivering between them. And then he raises his eyes to the barrier two towers over, staring at it for a long moment. 

He turns back to Kakashi, his voice hard. "I won‘t be able to change anything for my father. But I will be able to change something for Shikamaru if the shit hits the fan.“

 

Another explosion in the distance, and shaking ground, accompanied by screams, everywhere. A giant shadow drops from the sky, a huge toad squishing a gigantic snake in the distance. 

 

Asuma‘s voice is dry. "Looks like Jiraiya‘s officially arrived, too.“

Kakashi cannot help himself, he snorts, and then tilts his head to the breach. Wanting to go himself but knowing he must not. Not with the Anbu almost non-existent for some reason. "Go. Help them. I‘ll get this scum out of Konoha with Guy and the others.“ He hesitates for a moment. "Your father knows what to do.“ One way or another. And if not… then maybe it’s good if you’re not here.

Asuma cackles, once. "Yeah. He always does.“ They share another look. 

Asuma sighs and looks back at Kurenai, who is concentrating to release another pulse of chakra, to get the remaining villagers out of the genjutsu. 

 

They smile at each other, and then Asuma is off, and Kakashi turns, with a deep sigh, surveying the mess that was the arena. Now - where are you, Iruka? Are you safe already?

 

There’s an influx of bright chakra signatures suddenly, as shinobi not on duty arrive, kicking the shit out of their enemies. 

Kakashi smiles grimly, watches as Kiba‘s mother does a double-tag with Shikaku. 

 

He nods at Guy and then jumps over to the next balcony, a pair of goggles on a crying child catching his eye. It’s not Konohamaru, the boy much younger, and so Kakashi just scoops him up, turning towards where he can hear more children’s voices. In an exit tunnel leading towards the shelters.

He reaches, scanning, breathing a sigh of relief. There you are. 

 

The little kid is shivering in his arms, and he grips it tightly, grimacing as he drops down next to a frantic Iruka, who is trying to herd the children along, while looking mightily pained.

 

Kakashi’s voice is soft. “Here. Found something.”

Iruka sighs, loudly. “Oh, thank god, thank you Kaka-kun. I couldn’t find him, but couldn’t wait any longer either, some parts of the walls seem close to collapsing.” He takes the boy from Kakashi, nods at the group of pupils staring up at him with huge eyes, his voice sounding utterly fake to Kakashi. “See? All good now, we’re all accounted for. Let’s go now!” 

He shoots a thankful and yet frantic look at Kakashi, and then hurries away, and Kakashi watches after him for a moment, before turning and kicking an attacker into the stomach with a burst of chakra, throwing him through the arena.

The enemy ninja coughs, blood dripping from his mouth, but smiles, and then jumps up the wall. 

 

Kakashi snarls, and jumps to follow the man back up to the towers, his eye catching on the movement inside the barrier.

There’s boxes behind Orochimaru, large boxes, rising from the ground.

And then…

 

Kakashi freezes, and then stares, as Senju Hashirama and Senju Tobirama step out of those boxes. 

Kakashi’s mouth is dry, his gaze riveted to the third box. Oh god, no, can it be? His gaze swivels to the Sandaime, who looks very grim, and then back to the third box, which looks… jammed. He swallows, unable to say if he is disappointed or relieved, his feelings jumbled.

He looks at Orochimaru, who looks frustrated for a second, the face perpetually stuck in partway sage mode pinched.

 

Behind the barrier, in the distance, toads are fighting snakes, through stone and wood of destroyed houses.

 

Kakashi blinks, and then turns, shooting one last look at the barrier, and the aborted jutsu. Sensei… He exhales shudderingly, his mind churning, knowing well how a jutsu like that works, the coffins a stark indicator that Orochimaru has probably used Edo Tensei, the forbidden reanimation one. You have to have DNA, tissue, of the one you wish to raise. He swallows. Which means Orochimaru went and defiled graves. 

But… Kakashi frowns, knowing Minato’s grave has been undisturbed, visited by him day after day after all. He shoots another look up, something dark twisting in his gut. You took Naruto’s tissue, didn’t you. In the woods… Thinking it would suffice. But… That’s why it doesn’t work, too. You only have half of what you need.

 

He grimaces, grimly, and then turns his attention back to the cloaked attackers.

And makes them pay. 

 

At some point, Tenzou joins him, his uniform bloody.

Kakashi nods at him, vowing to talk to him. 

 

Later.

 

 

 

The barrier falls, eventually, to the scream of a thousand minds and mouths.

 

Another barrier, another death. Another tragedy.

 

 

Kakashi snarls, behind his mask, the still form of the Sandaime painfully twisting in his soul, despite everything. They took out the Hokage.

While we were here .

 

In our very own village.

 

He can see the same expression on Guy’s face, can feel the abject fury from Tenzou.

 

Guy’s cry is loud, pointing to the fleeing ninjas. “They’re on the move!”

Kakashi nods, his voice gravelly. “Wait! Don’t be hasty.” He grimaces. “If we rush in we‘ll only get snared in enemy traps.” And there’s bound to be some.

Guy’s voice is a rumble, heated. Rushed. “I‘m well aware of that. But whether there are traps waiting or not… I can’t let the enemies get away… that’s just not in the nature of Konoha shinobi.”

Kakashi smirks darkly. No, it’s not. Especially after something like this.

 

There will be HELL to pay.

 

Something tickles at the back of his mind, and he turns, watching the Sand ninja leader and a masked Anbu stare at them. 

Kakashi smiles grimly, ignoring the pawn, knowing who it is who had directed the fight all along. “So… all you ended up doing is watching, Kabuto?” He pushes his hitai-ate up, the world shifting into focus.

Kabuto’s voice is delighted, taking off his mask. "So you knew…“

Kakashi grimaces, wishing he really had. "Planning on running away from me again?“

Kabuto sighs. "For now, yes… I no longer wish to show you my jutsu so you can just copy it.“ He smirks. "Although… it seems to me that you haven’t mastered the eye as well as a member of the Uchiha clan would have.“

Nice of you to point that out. Kakashi grimaces again, silently vowing to find a way to train it. Next time we meet…

Kabuto sighs, interrupting his thoughts, raising his hand. "Well then.“ He disappears in a cloud of smoke with the other man, and Kakashi gnashes his teeth, realizing he must have prepared switching points beforehand, no disruption of energy discernible indicating a normal displacement jutsu.

Damn.

 

Tenzou drops down next to him, his voice is dark, carried on panted breaths, looking around at the bodies littered around them. “Senpai. There’s nothing we can do here. The enemy‘s fleeing.”

Kakashi tilts his head, looking at him, and then nods, and jumps up to the Hokage balcony with him.

Dreading. 

Knowing, too.

 

He forces himself to look.

 

There’s quiet swishes, as more and more shinobi follow their lead and arrive next to them, landing silently on the roof. 

 

 

Jiraiya stands behind the Sandaime’s prone form, unmoving, arms crossed, towering over the small body, an indecipherable expression on his face.

Towering over them all, a giant among mere men.

Kakashi blinks, fully realizing Jiraiya’s size for a moment, his presence. His pull. 

And his authority.

 

I bet they’ll name you the Godaime, won’t they.

 

Kakashi steps up to him, silently, looks at the wound in the Sandaime’s belly. 

A wound not fatal enough. Not this soon.

He looks up, shares a glance with Jiraiya.

Kakashi’s eyes travel down to where Jiraiya is standing, oh so nonchalantly hiding the scorch marks under his sandaled feet. 

Scorch marks Kakashi has seen before. 

Scorch marks he didn’t pay much attention to, the last time.

 

He closes his eyes for a long, long moment. 

Tries to feel… anything.

 

 

There’s some anger. And bitter relief. And his tattoo, tingling. 

 

 

 

Only the wind howls, the village eerily silent suddenly.

 

 

 

Off to the side, there’s a small puff of smoke.

 

Kakashi sighs softly, and then turns his back on his dead Hokage, stepping over to where Pakkun is sitting. He kneels down next to him. 

Pakkun raises his big eyes to his. “Hey boss!”

Kakashi swallows, keeping his tone light with an effort. “So, what’s the news?” A little voice inside him is praying, but even he could not say to who or what. 

Pakkun sighs, and then grins, fangs flashing for just a moment. “Naruto defeated Gaara.”

He‘s alive… Kakashi blinks, shivering. But I already knew that, didn’t I. Kakashi blinks again, swallowing past the lump in his throat, feeling Jiraiya’s attention snap to them. “What? They weren’t supposed to engage?”

 

Pakkun shrugs. “Shikamaru stayed back to buy us all some time when some enemies attacked, and this guy called Shino showed up and fought with that puppet master. Sasuke and Sakura lost against the transforming sand ninja and that wind user. The sand’s jinchuriki lost control of the beast inside him. Sakura had been trapped and held captive by then, that wind user was hiding, obviously afraid of the bijou, too.” He licks his snout. “Naruto refused to stop. He conjured hundreds of Kage Bunshin and pummeled some sense into the Wind‘s jinchuriki.”

Pakkun snickers, and Kakashi glowers at him, to which the little dog ducks his head. “Sorry.” He shrugs again. “That sand ninja, Gaara, he fully lost control shortly after.”

Kakashi blinks, dread coiling in his stomach. “You mean…”

Pakkun nods. “Yes, the one-tails appeared.”

 

Silence on the roof, as all the shinobi listen closely, attentively. 

 

Holding their breaths.

 

 

Pakkun clears his throat, shifting a bit under the sudden attention.

Kakashi exhales shudderingly, suddenly immensely glad to know already that Naruto won. “And then?”

Pakkun smirks at him. “Naruto summoned Gamabunta.”

Kakashi tilts his head, shares a look with Jiraiya from the very corner of his red eye, sees one corner of Jiraiya’s mouth tilt up. He exhales softly, prodding. “And then?”

Pakkun waggles his eyebrows. “They fought the one-tails. Naruto won by head-butting Gaara, who was kept in its grip.”

Kakashi blinks. “Head-butting.”

Pakkun nods. “Yes. And then talking to him.” He shrugs again. “Gaara gave up then, and the one-tails was subdued again.” He tilts his head. “His siblings took him away.”

 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a split second, his left hand clenching into a fist. So you won again through strength… and your words. Against another jinchuriki. 

 

There is something in his gut, reaching.

He feels like bursting. 

 

He shakes his head once to clear it, grimacing at a sudden thought. “So they’re all hurt and stuck somewhere?”

Pakkun rolls his eyes and shakes his head. “Of course not, boss. I wouldn’t have left them alone.” He grins again. “That Asuma showed up, with that very annoyed looking boy Shikamaru, and they are coming home together, now.”

 

Oh. Thank god.

 

Kakashi lowers his head, a weight dropping off his chest, the rush of relief making him almost light headed. He swallows, his voice gruff. “I… see.” He reaches out, places his hand onto Pakkun’s head for a moment. “Thank you, Pakkun.” He nods. “You’re dismissed.” If you want.

He knows Pakkun knows that he could stay if he wanted to.

Pakkun yawns, stretching, his dark eyes turning to the still form in the middle of the roof for a moment. He addresses all the ninja surrounding it. “I am sorry.”

And he’s gone, in a puff of smoke.

 

Kakashi stares at the spot where he’s been for a moment, before pushing himself up.

Jiraiya’s gaze burns into his back.

 

And then Jiraiya’s voice comes, easily drawing all their attention, assuming authority. “Take him to the halls under the tower. Secure the village. Bring everyone hurt to the hospital.” His dark eyes snap to Kakashi. “Kakashi, Genma, Tenzou, you’re with me.”

 

Kakashi tilts his head to shoot Genma a look, who blanches, and he almost snorts.

 

Jiraiya nods, and is gone, high in the air on his way to the tower.

 

Kakashi sighs, and then follows him, hearing Genma’s whispered curse.

Tenzou is silent, right behind him.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Genma keeps shifting from one foot to the other, obviously more than nervous, and Kakashi wants to tell him to knock it off, to relax, but he doesn’t, knowing full well that the Leaf now needs proper guidance and someone wielding authority, at least until order has been restored enough for the council to take over.

He shoots a look at Jiraiya, who is standing off to the side of the small table the Sandaime used to sit at, staring down at it. 

Tenzou is hovering half a step behind Kakashi, blood dripping from a small wound on his leg to the floor. Kakashi suddenly remembers all the instances of standing right here, dripping blood on the floor, with him. The floor is soaked in our blood.

He sighs.

 

Jiraiya’s voice draws him back to the present. His voice is resigned and dark, and hard. “First things first. Where were the Anbu?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, feels Tenzou shift slightly. 

Tenzou’s voice comes a bit haltingly. “We were ordered to investigate a supposed insurrection among the remains of the Ne. The order came through the council. The Sandaime reluctantly sent us to investigate before leaving for the exams.”

Kakashi frowns, feeling Jiraiya’s gaze glide over him like a physical touch, and he locks their gaze, for a split second. I bet it came from Danzo.

Jiraiya frowns. “I see.”

Silence, for a moment, as they all dwell on the implications. 

Jiraiya sighs, nodding once. “Go and get healing, then take stock of our forces. Our losses. Report to me afterwards.” He grimaces. “I’ll stay here for a while.”

Tenzou hesitates and then nods, jumping out silently.

 

Next to Kakashi, Genma gulps.

Jiraiya smirks, in a way that is not relaxing. “Now, to you.” Genma shifts again. “You sent a genin after a jinchuriki, which led to the village’s jinchuriki being sent after them.” He lowers his head, his eyes glittering. “That village’s jinchuriki being my godson.”

There is a pause as the words sink in.

Genma blanches even more, and Kakashi wants to shake his head, intervene, interject with that it had been him who had sent Naruto off after them, but he doesn’t, wondering why Jiraiya played this card, now.

Genma clears his throat, his voice sounding only vaguely off. “The Uchiha boy is way above genin level, skill-wise. I… felt it prudent to have him keep an eye on that trio.”

“Hmmm.” Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow. “They’re toddlers experience wise-though… and you sent them after what is essentially an unstable bijou?”

Genma grimaces, a note of insecurity in his voice. “But they won?”

 

Kakashi blinks.

There is a smirk on Jiraiya’s face, his voice carrying humor. “Indeed.” He turns away slightly, looks out of the window for a moment. “What is your impression of Naruto?”

Genma frowns, and then shrugs. “He’s unpredictable. And his chakra reserves are enormous. But he also has a strength that has nothing to do with chakra. He just kept getting up against Neji.” He shoots a look at Kakashi. “You weren’t there, Kakashi-san, but Neji did not go easy on Naruto. And Naruto just kept on talking and taking it. And then worked out a strategy to get through the defense.”

Kakashi smirks grimly behind his mask, nodding once. That sounds about right. He lifts his eyes to Jiraiya’s.

Who sighs softly, and then locks his gaze with Genma. “From this moment forward treating the jinchuriki of this village with disrespect will result in a… discussion with me, Sannin and godfather that I am.“ Genma grimaces, and Jiraiya glowers at him for a moment. " I want you to let all the shinobi know. You will still not tell him of his lineage”, he shares a quick look with Kakashi, who frowns, “but disrespecting him will have consequences from now on.”

Genma nods silently. 

Jiraiya smiles gently, a truly terrifying little smile. “Dismissed.”

 

Genma gulps again, and is gone, obviously happy to vanish.

 

Kakashi blinks, his voice rough. “Why?”

Jiraiya sighs through his nose, some of the aura of authority fading. “Why did I tell Genma of my connection to him, and why didn’t I rescind the order to hide Naruto’s lineage?”

Kakashi nods, jerkily.

Jiraiya steps over, slowly, with tired steps. “Because your seal did not release, did it?”

Kakashi frowns, trying to discern if it did or did not. “I… I don’t know?”

Jiraiya hums. “Well, the seal on me did, and I do know.” He grimaces. “You will know then, too.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, turning his face away. 

Fuck. 

 

He shakes his head, silently, and then reaches into his bag, pulling out Yugao’s mask. He sighs softly, holding it out to Jiraiya. “She lost her soulmate when Hayate died. She’s not fit for the Anbu anymore. Hiruzen wouldn’t let her go. I took her mask, and dismissed her.”

Jiraiya tilts his head, a vague smirk on his lips. “Did you now…” He takes the mask, the smirk growing to a grin. “Tsk tsk, Kakashi, taking on authority again… want to have the hat?”

Kakashi scoffs, loudly. “No fucking way.”

Jiraiya snickers. “See, that’s why I like you so much.” He sighs, and sobers, looking down at the mask. “I’ll give it to Tenzou later, and make it official.”

Kakashi nods, immensely grateful. “Thank you.”

 

He hesitates for a moment, clearing his throat. “So… the seal…?”

Jiraiya raises his eyebrows. “It’s gone, yes.” He grimaces. “I could tell you…”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, prompting. “But…?”

Jiraiya sighs. “Tsunade’s must have released as well.” Kakashi frowns, but Jiraiya continues, his voice hard. “I will make sure that Danzo does not get the hat. But I will not take it either, though I am sure that they will ask me. Which means I will need to go and look for Tsunade in a little while. I will tell you… with her. I promise. But… I’d rather only talk about this once.”

Kakashi swallows, his mind racing. 

 

Jiraiya sighs, changing the subject. “You actually did teach the Sasuke chidori.” An assassination technique to kill the jinchuriki if need be hangs in the air.

Kakashi grimaces, his tone dark. “As ordered by the Sandaime.”

Jiraiya licks along his teeth. “Indeed.” He blinks. “Do you think that will be a problem?”

Kakashi turns away, crosses his arms. “I… don’t think so.” I hope. He sighs, deciding to let Jiraiya in on the knowledge. Forgive me, Naruto. “Naruto’s told me they kissed in school, by accident, yes, but…” He trails off, grimacing, shrugging once before continuing. “There’s something between them. Obviously even.” He swallows, makes his voice hard, hoping and praying for the words to be the truth, while trying to stomp on the… jealousy deep within. “I firmly believe that Sasuke will not be able to kill Naruto.” His voice drops to a whisper. “Even if ordered.”

Jiraiya stares at him, for a long moment. His voice sounds… weird. “So fate blunted both chosen swords.”

Kakashi snorts, very derisively. “That’s what Sora-san said, too.”

Jiraiya’s eyes light up. “Right. I have to talk to her.” He hums, a small smile on his lips. His tone carries a note of wistfulness. “I bet Naruto has his stubbornness from Kushina. She just wouldn’t back down either.”

Kakashi chuckles for a moment, swallowing the sudden bout of emotion down. “Yeah.”

 

Jiraiya sighs, and then goes over to a small board, pulls out a bottle of sake. “Well, I would invite you to have a drink with me while waiting for the council”, his eyes glitter slyly at Kakashi’s for a moment, “but I think you rather want to go and meet with your team, hmm?”

Kakashi huffs a laugh. “Yeah.” He watches as Jiraiya settles in his usual place, in front of the little table. “Will you be alright?” I know how I felt when my Sensei died.

Jiraiya smiles softly, pouring himself a glass. “I left this village for a reason, Kakashi.” He raises his glass, toasts the empty place across from him with it. “I will be alright.” His head turns, the white hair shifting. “But thank you.” He grins. “Now go.”

 

Kakashi thankfully inclines his head, and jumps.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He drops down in front of the hospital doors, reaching for the handle, when the dark, tired voice stops him. 

"He‘s asleep.“

Kakashi blinks and withdraws his hand, looking over to the side, where Asuma is sitting on a bench half hidden by a tree, staring into the sky. Smoke twirls into the air from a forgotten cigarette between his fingers. 

Kakashi exhales and then steps over, sitting down next to him, gingerly. 

Asuma shoots him a look. "No worries, you’re not missing anything. The wounds were superficial, they’re just exhausted. They want to keep Naruto for another day to make sure he doesn’t have a concussion.“

Kakashi frowns, and nods, looking unseeing into the distance. He exhales, slowly. The words taste like ash. “I am sorry.“ For you.

Asuma snorts. "Yeah, me too I guess.“

Kakashi’s throat clicks, the words tasting bitter, for once not like chocolate. "It definitely was personal for Orochimaru. Well planned.“ He swallows. "Too well.“

 

Asuma hums, and then looks down at his burnt down cigarette. He drops it and takes out his pack, offering it to Kakashi after a moment. "I know you don’t normally smoke…“

Kakashi blinks, and then takes one, twirling it in his fingers before reaching up and pulling his mask down, glad that they’re half hidden by the tree and hidden from sight, but also weirdly yearning for the way the smoke will burn his lungs. Make him feel life. 

And to offer Asuma something he can give.

 

Asuma reaches up and light it for him, and then his own. He lets his gaze travel rather blatantly over Kakashi’s features and then chuckles, shaking his head. “Damn, it’s a shame we never hooked up.”

Kakashi snorts, and takes a drag, grimacing at the taste, and the way his body wants to reject the smoke. He suppresses the need to cough and blows out the smoke slowly, watching it fade. “Yeah, well, some things just don’t work out.” And definitely not the way you plan. He shoots Asuma a look. “Unfortunately.”

Asuma hums, eyes averted again, but there’s a crinkle at the corner of them. “No, I guess not.”

 

They are silent again, for a long moment. Kakashi finishes the cigarette, putting it out by stomping it into the ground with the heel of his foot. He draws the mask back up and leans back a bit, the taste in his mouth making him work his jaw and tongue. At least it’s not chocolate. He snorts softly to himself.

Asuma shoots him an inquiring look.

Kakashi shrugs, tone vaguely apologetic. “Just… the taste is very different from certain seals.”

Asuma quirks an eyebrow. “Did it release?”

Kakashi blows the air out, in a rush. “Nope.”

Asuma’s throat clicks when he speaks. “If I hadn’t gone after Shikamaru today, he would have died.”

Kakashi inhales deeply, nods once. “Good choice then.” A life for a life. That’s how it often is, isn’t it.

Asuma flashes a broad, fake smile. “Yeah.” He clears his throat, the smile dropping off his face. “I heard that Orochimaru used Edo Tensei.”

Kakashi nods, suddenly feeling extremely tired, the events of the day catching up to him. “Yes. And the Sandaime called on Enma…”

Asuma sighs, nodding. “Yeah.” He frowns. “I saw the wound the sword left.” He hesitates. “An ugly wound, granted…” He trails off, and Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, trying to find the right words.

He licks his lips, his voice low, knowing Asuma deserves to know though. “I have seen the marks of the jutsu he used before, even if it was invisible to our eyes. Twelve years ago.”

 

Asuma is silent for long minutes. 

Kakashi watches the clouds drift by, acutely feeling the pain of the man next to him. And knowing he cannot do anything to help.

Eventually Asuma sniffs, angrily wiping over his face. He nods, once, his voice gruff. “Thank you, Kakashi.”

Kakashi grimaces, shaking his head once. “Don’t thank me.”

Asuma snorts, leaning forward, elbows on his knees. Trying for levity, though it’s coming out rather caustic. “You’re here, you’re telling me the truth, your fucking hot underneath that mask. What’s not to thank you for.”

Kakashi shares a look with him, and Asuma nods, shaking another cigarette from his pack. He clears his throat. “Well then. I’ll go meet with Kurenai. Who wanted to meet Sora-san this afternoon,  after all this… mess.” He turns his head to fully look at Kakashi, a brittle smirk on his face. “You’re going to go in and sit with him, aren’t you.”

Kakashi weighs his head, tone flat. “I’ll probably pretend to read a bit while… resting my eyes.”

Asuma cackles, and then pushes himself up, exhaling in a rush. “Don’t snore too loud.”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows. “I never snore.”

Asuma chuckles. “Yeah? I’ll have to ask Iruka at some point.” He winks. “Or Naruto in a few years.”

Kakashi groans, deeply, waving at him. “Go. Go to Kurenai.” Find some solace with her. He sighs. “And give her and Sora my best.”

Asuma turns away, throwing the words over his shoulder. “I will. Room 23.”

 

Kakashi watches him go, watches as the shoulders go up again a bit further with every step away and towards Kurenai, and he sighs, turning towards his own supposed destiny, apparently sleeping in room 23.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“Sensei!”

 

Kakashi blinks, silently clearing his throat. Pretending to not just have woken up in the chair with a bad tension in his neck. Warmth flutters in his stomach. “Naruto. So good to see you’re awake.”

Blue eyes burn at him, with the fire of too much energy. And the fox’ healing powers. Kakashi smirks softly. 

Naruto’s voice is exuberant, throwing his hands out. “Sensei, we did it!!” 

Kakashi chuckles. “So I heard.” He clears his throat again, loudly this time, and puts the unread Icha Icha book away into his bag, while getting up, his muscles protesting. He steps over, standing next to Naruto, who is grinning up at him, his hair sticking into all directions.

 

Kakashi reaches out and flips his finger at a tuft. “Slept well?”

Naruto beams up at him, leaning into his fingers for a moment and Kakashi withdraws them, oh so nonchalantly, his heart beating in his throat. Still feels like spun gold, and smelling like sunshine. And home.

 

Naruto nods wildly. “Shikamaru’s Sensei, Sensei Asuma, he came and escorted us home.”

Kakashi hums. “Mhhh. I’m glad it all worked out. The doctors said you only need to stay another day, or so, the wounds are all superficial.” He frowns, and then sits down on the edge of the bed, next to Naruto’s feet. “Naruto… we can talk about it all a bit later. For now, there’s something I have to tell you.”

Naruto blinks at him, the still small face suddenly serious, the eyes knowing. 

Kakashi grimaces, looking away for a moment. “Naruto… I’m sorry. “ I know you liked him. He swallows. “There have been deaths. Among them…” Asuma’s father. He frowns. “The Sandaime died protecting the village.” So did Hayate. And a dozen others. He watches silently as the words sink in, as the light in Naruto’s eyes dims. It is as painful to witness as the last time and Kakashi forces himself to be still, not to squirm, as he instinctively tries to get away from this sorrow in them.

Naruto’s voice is small. “I see.” He looks away, the profile framed in light and gold. “Thank you, Sensei.”

 

Kakashi swallows, recognizing a dismissal when he hears one. He silently gets up, reaching out a last time, placing his hand on Naruto’s head for a moment. His voice is gruff. “I’m glad you’re home safe and sound.”

Naruto sniffs, his eyes averted.

Kakashi withdraws his hand, slowly. He gets up, feeling like the universe is pressing down on him, every move he makes met by resistance. He forces himself to step away. 

Naruto’s voice stops him. “Sensei?”

“Hmm?” Kakashi turns, hands deep in his pockets. 

Naruto squirms a bit, his voice coming haltingly. “Sensei… I… could you get my toiletries for me? And water my plants?”

Kakashi blinks, somewhat taken by surprise. He hesitates and then shrugs, with a deep sigh. “Err… sure?” Whatever you need.

Naruto nods, his voice very small. “Thank you, Sensei.”

Kakashi frowns, desperately wanting to extend comfort, but not knowing how. “Naruto…” He grimaces, shaking his head once. “I’ll go get them and do that. And then…” He tilts his head, remembering something Jiraiya said, back then. “Why don’t I bring you some vegetables, too, and we’ll cook together, after the funeral, hmm?”

Naruto nods, mutely. And then he frowns. “When is the funeral?”

Kakashi sighs. “Likely in two days.” He turns to the door, every step away from Naruto a heavy one. “Rest now, for another day. You will need your strength.” We will all need our strength. The Leaf will want to retaliate. He frowns, looking back. “Naruto… do you have the proper attire?”

Naruto frowns, shrugging once. “I… what is the proper attire?”

Kakashi blinks. Right. He sighs softly. “Why don’t I pick you up when you’re released tomorrow, and we’ll go and buy proper clothes? I can go and buy the vegetables later.”

Naruto raises an eyebrow. “Okay… don’t forget to water my plants though. The ones in the kitchen especially need some…”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, shooting him a look. “And get your toiletries, yes, I haven’t forgotten.”

Naruto ducks his head, some of the light returning to his eyes. There is something in his tone Kakashi cannot place. “And don’t forget to water Mr. Ukki either.”

 Kakashi pushes the door open, with a look back. “I haven’t.”

Naruto grins at him, and Kakashi cannot help himself, he grins back.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto throws the crumpled and dirty orange suit carelessly to the floor, the clothes landing on his equally carelessly kicked off shoes, both just visible beneath the changing room curtain.

Kakashi stares at them, remembering buying them, so, so long ago. Guessing Naruto’s size, and missing by a mile still. Which hadn’t mattered. They’re almost too small now, and the thread is thin in places, but the slingshot is still attached to the Uzumaki swirl patch, looking mightily unused. Well, at least you never shot it at your teachers.

He smirks softly, and then frowns, wondering if he should go and get Naruto one of the standard uniforms, too, to grow into. But I cannot get him jonin attire, he’s not even a chunin. And even though he showed considerable skill in the tournament he‘s too hot-headed for them to consider him I bet… totally apart from their prejudice.

 

The curtain swishes open, rather succinctly ending that thought, revealing a Naruto dressed in all black. The golden hair is sticking up again, and the patch on his cheek makes him look a bit wild, but the black serves to make him appear much older, much more… grave.

And elegant. 

Tall, somehow. 

 

Kakashi swallows and then nods, knowing they’ll all look that way tomorrow. “That would do. What do you think?”

Naruto looks down at himself, and then at the mirror, turning once in front of it. “I… guess?” He picks at the thin cloth. “It’s just so flimsy.”

Kakashi snorts gently. “It’s not meant to be worn for anything strenuous. It’s only supposed to… exude respect for those who died.”

Naruto grimaces, shooting a look at Kakashi. “Have you been to many funerals, Sensei?”

Kakashi stares at him, his eyes unseeing for a long moment. “Too many.” He frowns, and then clears his throat, trying to make his voice lighter again. “So, are you happy with how you look?”

Naruto shrugs, and then nods. 

 

Kakashi nods as well, and then lets his eyes travel to the crumpled heap of orange. “Need something else to generally wear on missions, too?”

Naruto follows his gaze, and then hesitates for a long moment. And then he smiles, a wide, fake smile. “Nawwww, not yet. I’ll wear it a bit longer.” I cannot afford both hangs in the air, heavy and stifling. Kakashi grimaces behind his mask.

He wonders if he could get away with starting to buy Naruto things, without it becoming weird. 

Because he wants to. He swallows. 

Fat chance though. That would be weird within three seconds.

 

Naruto draws the curtain closed again, and Kakashi stares at it, unseeingly, his mind carefully empty.

“Sensei?” 

The word seems to float up to him, and he only grunts in answer. “Hmm?”

There is a pause, as Kakashi sees that Naruto pulls on his shoes. The curtain is pulled open once more, and Naruto comes out, clothes carefully folded over his arm. His eyes are huge on Kakashi’s, sending a shiver down Kakashi’s spine. “Sensei, do you think the Sandaime is at peace now?”

Kakashi schools his features, makes himself stay relaxed. With an effort. The lie drips off his tongue with the taste of chocolate. “I know he is.”

Naruto sniffs, and then nods, once. “Alright.” He clears his throat, and then turns to the counter, hesitating after a step. Kakashi quirks an eyebrow in inquiry. 

Naruto shrugs, vulnerability in his voice. “Will you really come and cook with me?”

Kakashi tilts his head, hands clenched into the cloth of his pants in his pocket, making himself not reach out and hug Naruto. “Yes, of course, why?”

Naruto blushes, just a bit, shifting embarrassedly from one foot to the other. “I… Just I guess I have to clean a bit first.”

Kakashi coughs out a surprised laugh, the first real one in days. “Yeah, that would be good. I mean, I had to pick my way through the ramen cups yesterday after all.”

Naruto blushes even more deeply, and then turns away, with a groan. “Right.”

 

Kakashi follows him, viciously suppressing a totally and utterly inappropriate snicker.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

It’s raining, the drops so fine the world seems to be laid under a sheer curtain, brushing his skin like fingers of the ones they’re trying to reach. To pay tribute to.

Kakashi stares at the monument, Obito’s name the only thing in focus.

He’s feeling surprisingly close to Obito today, a feeling that is… pressure in his eye. 

And his gut. 

 

Where are you now? Are you there, with Rin? Are you waiting, exchanging stories with my father? And my mother? Do you yell at all the other Uchiha for not seeing the massacre coming despite their eyes? He grimaces, closing his own, silently admonishing himself. Another clan, almost wiped out because of its powers. The Uzumaki and the Uchiha share this fate. He frowns. Another thing that connects you.

 

Her voice is soft, calmer and more secure than the last time. "Senpai.“

He doesn’t turn his head, seeing the small bouquet of flowers from the corner of his eyes. "That for Hayate?“ He swallows when she doesn’t answer, trying to seem unperturbed. "The Sandaime‘s ceremony has already started… you better hurry.“

She steps up to him, silently, the only sound the soft rustling of the wrapping paper the flowers are in. There is a lot of wistfulness in her voice. "And you Kakashi? Paying respects to Obito?“

Yes… and no.  

Kakashi turns away, steps back, to make room for her.

Yugao‘s voice is trembling, but carrying a note of humor. "Instead of constantly being late, why don’t you just come here earlier?“

Hah. Kakashi swallows again, his throat clicking. "I… I do, first thing in the morning.“ Every morning. He sighs, and then shoots her a look, which she catches, and holds. "It’s just… once I get here… I can’t stop thinking about what an idiot I used to be.“

And what an idiot I am still. In all likelihood. 

He can see her lips twitch in a small smile from the corner of his eye.

Well. An idiot that made her smile at least. He inhales, deeply, his thoughts in turmoil, watching her place the flowers carefully at the base of the monument.

 

The words come from somewhere deep within him, somewhere outside his conscious mind. “She loved those flowers.”

Yugao turns to him, her big eyes unblinking and kind on his. “Who did?”

Kakashi exhales softly. “My mother. And the Yondaime’s wife, Kushina. They both had these flowers at home. When… I was still very young I thought that the flowers had only been there for my mother’s wake, I never realized that my father kept buying them in her memory.” He blinks, and then chuckles quietly. “I remember telling Kushina that those flowers were inappropriate to have in your home, since they were supposed to be for the dead.” He shakes his head at himself, with a sigh. “I was an obnoxious, all-knowing, stupid little kid.”

Yugao smirks at him for a moment, her nose crinkling adorably. “What did she say?”

Kakashi snorts. “To the flowers?” He shrugs. “Nothing much. She just smiled at me. And told me she liked them. And that was reason enough.” He frowns, eyes faraway. “Though she did have quite a temper Kushina never lashed out without reason.” He shoots Yugao a look. “If she yelled at you, you had indeed earned it.”

He chuckles with her, air between them lighter somehow, not as stifling.

He lets the smile fade, tilting his head, with a sigh. “You look better.”

Yugao nods, looking away to the side. Her voice comes haltingly. “Leaving… my duties behind has marked a breaking point for me…” Her eyes return to his, dropping to a whisper. “I could breathe again.”

Kakashi swallows, knowing that feeling well. His voice breaks on the words. “How can you stand the longing?”

Yugao looks down at the flowers, a forlorn and yet peaceful expression on her face. She shrugs, elegantly, her eyes wet with unshed tears. “I know he’s waiting.” She smiles at Kakashi, a huge, brilliant smile. “But I also know he wouldn’t want me to leave this world.” She swallows, her brows furrowing. “Not yet.” Her lips tremble, her eyes closing in abject pain. “Not when…”

Kakashi blinks and suddenly understands, his own eyes closing for a long moment. A life for a life. He smiles though, around the words laced by understanding pain. “I see. Congratulations, Yugao.”

Yugao sniffs, and then chuckles, and then sniffs again. “Yeah, well, the timing is perfect.”

Kakashi smirks at her, and then shakes his head. “The timing marks a new era for this village. What could be better?”

She sniffs, and then laughs, once, shrugging. “I… yeah. Maybe.” She shoots him a thankful look. “Thank you, Senpai.” She reaches up and pushes some wayward hair behind her ear, turning away slowly. “I’ll go and pay my respects now.”

He nods, his voice gentle. “I’ll follow you in a minute.”

She nods and turns, her steps fading, swallowed by mist and rain and distance.

 

 

 

Kakashi stares after her, and then closes his eyes, his mind blank.

“You have a way with people - if you let yourself show that you care.” 

Kakashi opens his eyes, raises them to Jiraiya’s dark ones. “Caring and showing hasn’t had the best track record for me in the past…” It’s only brought me pain. Again and again.

Jiraiya hums, weighing his head, his eyes unseeing on the monument. “And yet you do care deeply. I know you have friends, even if you try to keep them at arm’s length. I know you loved your team.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “I know you love your current team.” 

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, willing him to stop, to no avail, Jiraiya continuing relentlessly. “You loved your Sensei and his wife. Deeply.” He quirks an eyebrow, looking at Kakashi from the corner of his eyes. “You are afraid that caring this deeply once more will lead to tragedy.” Jiraiya lowers his head, and his voice. “You are afraid that loving Naruto will destroy you both.”

Kakashi swallows, turning away, his voice gruff. “Shouldn’t you be at the funeral?”

Jiraiya chuckles, his teeth flashing. “Shouldn’t you be?”

Kakashi grimaces, and he snarls, quietly. “What is it that you want, Jiraiya. I mean, here, now?”

Jiraiya steps around him, standing in front of him with his arms crossed. 

Towering in front of him. Kakashi looks away, his stomach churning. 

 

Jiraiya leans in a bit, making it impossible to ignore him. His eyes burn. 

 

The words come like bullets, piercing him. “I’ve been thinking. And the reason that you cannot fully control your sharingan is that… you don’t allow yourself to fully feel. The reason that you are emotionally torn every which way is that you cannot build an emotional equilibrium, because you don’t allow yourself to fully feel. The reason why the sharingan is always draining you empty is because you think you deserve to be punished for using it.”

Kakashi stands there, shaking in the rain, his mind stunned and frantic and stuck in stubborn denial. No. I… I am no Uchiha. That is the reason. It has nothing to do with my feelings… or my guilt.

Jiraiya’s eyes bore into his, his voice heated, ignoring his obvious emotional state. “The reason why you cannot enjoy life is because you don’t grant yourself to live. You think you owe your dead team your life because you’re the only who got to survive. And you have to stop that. For your own sake. And Naruto’s.”

Kakashi gasps, desperate for oxygen, his hands trembling.

The only thing that lets him speak is futile anger, though he is not sure who exactly it is directed at. How dare you. His voice is raw, the words without passion. “You’re insane.”

 

Jiraiya lifts his eyebrows, looking vaguely amused. “Is that so?” He turns away slightly, speaking back over his shoulder. “Well, time will tell.” He frowns, and looks away for a moment, before he locks their gaze once more. “I don’t expect you to snap your fingers and just accept everything and all will be happy and sparkling.” He scoffs. “I know it doesn’t work that way.” He shakes his head once, looking away again. “We’ll talk about it again. Another time.”

Kakashi swallows, his voice unrecognizable and dripping with cynicism. “Looking forward to it.” Not.

Jiraiya cackles, once, harshly. “I’m sure.” He draws himself up to full height. “Alright. Funeral. Now. Don’t make me drag you there by the scruff of your neck.”

 

And he’s gone.

Kakashi sniffs, hands twitching emptily, futilely, the phantom touch of bones and blood and lightning dancing along it. 

 

And then he wills his flaring emotions down and turns to follow Jiraiya, fatalistically, the world blurry and hurting.

 

 

Damn you. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 16: Red eyes, seeing all

Notes:

Obviously the discussions with Jiraiya have to happen a bit differently here, than in the manga... I did keep the gist of it though.

The other day I ran across someone on twitter calling Jiraiya names and sexist and misogynist. I… cannot quite say how wrong I find that assessment. If you read the early manga and realize the difference of what Jiraiya THINKS vs what he SAYS (and does at times)… Jiraiya spends a lot of time “researching” because he’s looking for information. Especially those you only get from the shady side of society. I’m (definitely) not defending all his bad habits here, I’m just saying that a carefully built reputation does serve to blind people. And he’s using that.

Jiraiya has loved Tsunade all his life, and he took her rejection with grace - and understanding. Imho that is actually much more of a seal of character than a lot of other things, especially given how “rejection“ is such a danger for women in our reality - worldwide.

 

That scene in the manga where he and Kakashi talk about the fact that Jiraiya should now take over Naruto’s education is especially telling imho. (It’s in the middle of the Itachi-fight: https://ww4.naruto6.com/manga/naruto-chapter-143/)

He and Kakashi talk, quite frankly, about Kakashi not having the skills to ‘get Naruto ready’ for the Akatsuki. And Kakashi accepts that assessment. And subsequently lets Naruto go. 

Kakashi obviously knows his own powers and limits (at least most of the time, chakra exhaustion, hint, hint), and he lets Naruto go into the care of this old guy with a pervert’s reputation, who… he obviously accepts is the only one able to protect Naruto from NINE S-rank criminals.

 

My setup of this story notwithstanding - but I feel that wouldn’t be something he would do of he didn’t trust Jiraiya. And his abilities.

 

AND his character.

Chapter Text

 

 

 

“People fight for those they wish to protect.” There is a pause, Iruka’s voice lowering. “Those they love.”

Kakashi glides silently between the shinobi behind Iruka and Naruto, pretending to have always been there. He watches as Naruto’s big blue eyes stare up at Iruka, as Konohamaru next to him sniffs, wiping his puffy red eyes. Another form of red eyes. Also fraught with tragedy.

He blinks, looking up at the Sandaime’s picture for a long moment. There’s a dozen or more pictures next to it, lined up beautifully and with flowers laid out before them. 

We lost much.  

 

Naruto’s voice draws him back, the tone shivering with something he cannot place. "Die for someone you love?“

Kakashi gasps quietly, blinking rapidly, remembering, vividly.

Iruka’s voice sounds harsh. “Yes.”

Kakashi frowns, his voice quiet, forcing it to be firm. To assure. “The Sandaime did not die in vain, he left us something important.“ He left us with the will of fire. Like all the other before him. It doesn’t matter what else he was. Or did.

Naruto stares at him, and then smirks, and his eyes flash, and Kakashi knows, just knows that they’re both remembering that moment on the bridge. 

Naruto’s voice is… teasing. "Give me a little respect, I understand.“ 

Kakashi snorts, feeling the shinobi around disperse, slowly. 

While he stares into blue.

 

After a moment, the blue is gone, and Kakashi blinks, clearing his throat. 

He doesn’t dare to turn his head, knowing Iruka is looking at him. Intently. 

With a smirk. 

 

Jiraiya steps up to him, flanking his other side, and Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, his voice acerbic when he speaks. “Well, I definitely haven’t reached that emotional equilibrium yet.”

He can sense Iruka frown, leaning a bit forward to look at his face, while Jiraiya chuckles. 

Jiraiya sighs, and shakes his head. “No, no, no worries. We’ll talk about that later.” He inhales deeply, and then raises his chin, indicating the Sandaime’s picture. “I was indeed asked to be Hokage.”

Kakashi is silent, knowing what’s coming, but Iruka inhales sharply.  His voice is laced with admiration. “Congratulations, Jiraiya-sama.”

Jiraiya grumbles, and it loosens something in Kakashi, making him smirk, with a sniff. His voice is dry. “I take it you declined?”

Iruka looks at him weirdly, but Jiraiya just shrugs, his voice dry. “Of course.”

They’re all silent for a moment, with Iruka blinking rapidly. He clears his throat, eyes flitting back and forth between them. “So… what happens now?”

Jiraiya exhales loudly, shrugging once. “I’m going to take Naruto on a little trip. We’re going to get the new Godaime.”

Iruka frowns, but Kakashi tilts his head, feeling more than slightly unsettled. “Think you can just find Tsunade-sama that easily?” Think you can find her so fast? I don’t wan… He stomps down onto the thought, furious at himself. Get a grip.

Jiraiya shoots him a knowing look. “No worries. I heard she’s around. I’ll just need to track her down. A month, maybe two.”

 

Kakashi nods, crossing his arms, knowing full well what his body language is saying and not giving a single fuck. 

 

There’s a grin on Jiraiya’s lips now. “I thought maybe I make it three months and teach him that jutsu we talked about.”

Kakashi quirks his eyebrow, working his jaw. Three months. But the jutsu would be good. In a way, it’s even his heritage. “Think he’ll master it in that time?”

Jiraiya weighs his head, humming for a moment. “His chakra system is aligned again, I repaired the seal. He might.”

Iruka frowns, shaking his head once. “You repaired his seal?”

Jiraiya nods. “Yes, Orochimaru loosened it in the forest of death, but it was unstable even before that I bet. Kakashi told me you’d noticed that, so I decided to look at it.” He shoots a look at Kakashi. “Probably because Minato had to apply it so hastily.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking down at his feet. He frowns. “So it’s not permeable for the healing powers anymore?”

Jiraiya shakes his head. “No, I left that as is. Given the boy’s stubborn and reckless tendencies I thought that prudent. But the chakra itself does not mix constantly anymore.” He smirks. “And as you heard, I successfully found the key to have him access the fox’ powers.”

Kakashi nods, shooting him a look from the corner of his eyes. “Yeah. How?”

Jiraiya leans in a bit, his eyes glittering. “Ask him yourself.”

Kakashi grimaces, turning away just a bit, his neck… tickling with energy running down his spine. And energy, in his limbs. He’s not sure whether he wants to lash out or… He swallows, stomping on that thought, too.

 

Iruka’s gaze swivels back and forth between them both, frowning heavily. 

Jiraiya smirks at Kakashi, and then leans back, turning away slowly. The comment is thrown back over his shoulder, almost offhand. “I heard there are some interesting folks around. I bet they will show up at teahouses.” He hesitates, locking his gaze with Kakashi. “Do go and cook with Naruto first though, before you look for them. I heard you promised.”

He smirks and walks away, slowly, and Kakashi groans, pinching the bridge of his nose. Right.

Iruka steps in front of him, his voice shivering with amusement and incredulity. “What the hell was all that?”

Kakashi shrugs, with a grimace, his voice deadpan. “Jiraiya-sama?”

Iruka stares at him, a weird glitter in his eyes. “Uh huh.”

Kakashi glowers, tone vicious. “What.”

Iruka pulls a face, raising his hands a bit, deflecting. With laughter in his voice. “Nothing, nothing.” He grunts, looking away, but there’s a grin somewhere on his face, too.

 

Kakashi growls and turns away, on his way to get vegetables, for heaven’s sake.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The silence between them is companionable, and Naruto munches on his vegetables with rice and chicken happily enough, shooting him a look from time to time.

 

Kakashi watches him, between chakra-sped-up bites, the corners of his eyes crinkling at the obvious build-up. So. What do you want to ask, hmm?

He clears his throat, finishing off his rice and chicken, too, before leaning back.

He crosses his arms, quirking an eyebrow, deciding to prompt. “Spill.”

 

Naruto’s eyes snap up to his, his cheeks coloring just a bit. “I…” He clears his throat, shifting in his seat. “I heard a rumor earlier? From Shikamaru?”

Kakashi swallows, a shiver running down his spine. Shikamaru, huh? I bet that came from Asuma then. He tries to make his voice firm, dreading Naruto knowing the truth. Asking about it. Directly. What would I do then? What could I do then? Would I be able to answer your questions? “What rumor.”

Naruto pushes the last of his rice together with his sticks, raising his eyebrows. “I heard that you and Sensei Iruka…” He trails off, blushing heavily.

Kakashi breathes in deeply, the rush of relief that travels through him almost comical. He nods, but prods, suddenly enjoying seeing Naruto squirm. He’s almost 13 now, he’ll become interested in all that rather sooner than later… He grimaces behind his mask. That will be so FUN to watch. “Me and Iruka?”

Naruto shifts in his seat again, looking off to the side, but asks, rather bravely. “I heard you and Sensei Iruka were, like, together? A… few years back?”

Kakashi swallows, the pain the statement elicits a cultivated and sedate one by now. He clicks his tongue. “That’s true, not that long ago, actually. We broke up around the same time you finished the academy.” That very night, actually. Kakashi relaxes his shoulders, with an effort.

“Oh.” Naruto blinks, scooping up the last bite, chewing on it absentmindedly. 

Kakashi frowns. “Why?” He narrows his eyes, gentling the words with a definite tease in his tone. “Weren’t you the one who told me it would be okay if I had a boyfriend?”

Naruto colors, deeply, clearing his throat again. He nods, jerkily.

Kakashi sighs. “What, Naruto.”

 

Naruto looks away for a long moment, his big, soulful eyes returning to Kakashi after, something in them that takes Kakashi’s breath. His voice is low. “Nothing. I just… I was wondering why I was never adopted. And I… ”

He trails off, looking away again, and Kakashi tries to breathe, tries to deflect, tries to fucking cope, because the pain feels so real, so burning, so brutal for a long moment, and he knows, he KNOWS that it is that way for Naruto as well.

And you wondered why we never considered adopting you.

And you wished we had.

 

You wished we had.

 

Oh god.

 

His voice is shivering when he finally speaks, but he doesn’t give a shit, needing Naruto to understand, beyond the rising taste of chocolate. “Naruto, I…” He swallows, going for the easy explanation, or the one that seems to be easiest at least. “Naruto I wasn’t always a teacher. I couldn’t have cared for a child then. Not with what I did.” And I wasn’t allowed to quit. He swallows again, harshly, his voice gruff. “And Iruka…” He trails off, shaking his head once. “Iruka had to learn to like you, and then…” He trails off again, not knowing what to say.

 

Naruto sniffs. “He had to learn to like me because of the fox, right?”

Kakashi sniffs too, crossing his arms. “None of this is your fault.” And ain’t that the utter truth. 

Naruto nods, his face turned away. 

 

He gets up silently, and takes the dishes and sticks, carrying them over to the sink. 

Kakashi lets him, staying in his chair, not knowing what to do. Or say.

 

His tattoo is weirdly silent, but then his whole body is in turmoil, reaching and yearning and yet numb.

Naruto sniffs again, and Kakashi just does, without an active thought, getting up and falling to his knees in one fluid motion, drawing Naruto down into a crushing embrace. 

Naruto’s arms come up and around his neck, holding fast, silent sobs wrecking his body.

Kakashi’s mask and shirt are getting wet, but he doesn’t care, cannot care, because the feeling is right, and he wants it, his nose pushed into gold, hands clenched into orange.

Needing this, more than he cares to admit.

Knowing Naruto needs this, too, more than anything, right now.

 

The sobs gentle, eventually, turn into sniffling breaths.

Kakashi strokes that still small back, feels the muscles that have built already through training and missions. One hand comes up to gently pet Naruto’s head, stroking the hair, carefully not threading through, not assuming even more intimacy, only extending comfort.

 

Naruto melts against him, and time fades, there, for them.

For a while.

 

He withdraws a bit, eventually, and it’s… alright, not even painful.

The eyes are rimmed in red, bearing all the pain in the world.

 

Kakashi reaches up, pushing a strand of hair out of Naruto’s forehead. His voice is a whisper. “And to think I sat down and told Inari that I’d never seen you cry…”

Naruto snorts, sniffing again, his fingers on Kakashi’s arms fumbling with the cloth. He swallows, one blonde eyebrow quirking. “Yeah, well, I normally am alone, so…”

Kakashi exhales softly, meaning the words. “I am sorry.”

Naruto’s face falls, scrunching, and the looks away, keeping new tears in with an effort. He clears his throat, shakes his head once. “Not your fault.”

 

Kakashi hums, shaking his head. “No. Still…”

Naruto quirks a small smile at him, a thankful, little, painful smile. He clears his throat. “Would have been nice though, to have you and Sensei Iruka as parents.”

Kakashi swallows, and then raises his eyebrows, trying for some levity. “Ya think?” He leans in, makes his voice a conspiratorially whisper. “He would have sat you down and practice kanji for months though. And he cleans, a lot. And he snores.”

Naruto groans, and then chuckles, some of the light back in his eyes. Rolling his eyes. “Oh noooooo.”

Kakashi grins at him, and then carefully draws back a bit, giving them both room to calm a bit. 

Naruto nods after a moment. “Thank you, Sensei.”

Kakashi hums. “Well, remember, you already realized that we, and Sasuke, and Sakura are your family.” He reaches up, stomping on the need to draw Naruto back into an embrace, grasping his shoulder instead. “You can always come to me.”

Naruto nods again, jerkily, his lips twitching. 

Kakashi leans in, searching his eyes, waits until they’re properly locked to his. “You’re not alone anymore, Naruto.” Never will be again. Not if I can help it.

He swallows, realizing he means it, too.

 

Naruto’s face crumbles once more, and a new tear falls, and he reaches up, hastily wiping it away, obviously trying to calm himself.

Kakashi gets up quietly, steps back a bit, gives him some space.

Naruto shoots him a look and smiles, indicating the table with a nod before stepping over, and sitting down again. Kakashi follows suit, sinking into his seat.

 

Naruto stares down onto the table for a long moment, and then looks out the window, the clean window, his voice carrying wistfulness. “Sensei, I never told you, but I met Hinata before my fight with Neji, and…” He smiles softly, something warm in it. “And she told me I could win.” The smile turns into a grin, a big, shit-eating grin. “And I did.”

Kakashi chuckles. “So I heard. Genma-san was impressed.”

Naruto ducks his head. “Yeah, well, I’m really glad I knew about that other chakra in me… I wouldn’t have managed otherwise.”

Kakashi hums, quirking an eyebrow. “I heard you trained accessing it?”

Naruto’s eyes light up, his voice getting excited. “Oh yes, and, I mean, I had to, right, because otherwise I couldn’t have called the big one, and I really needed that to fight Gaara.” He spreads his arms. “That was soooooo cool, Sensei, Gamabunta was as big as that thing inside Gaara, and we destroyed so many trees, and we were so high up in the sky between the jumps.” He grimaces, rubbing his forehead. “Head-butting Gaara really hurt though.”

Kakashi chuckles, his eyes closing for a moment. “I can imagine.”

 

He shares a grin with Naruto, then raises his chin. “So how do you access the fox’ chakra?”

Naruto shrugs, rolling his eyes. “I don’t know. It’s got something to do with danger and adrenaline and my emotions in that moment…” He laughs, his blue eyes flashing. “That old pervert, Ero-Sennin, he threw me down into a ravine to get me to learn that, can you imagine?”

 

Kakashi blinks, his voice… flat. “He did what?”

Naruto blinks at him, his voice suddenly careful. “I… I mean, it worked out?”

Kakashi stares at him, grunting once, not trusting his voice. I’m gonna kill him. 

The muscles in his jaw jump, and Naruto shifts in his seat, obviously picking up on his mood. “Err… Sensei, I mean, it’s really alright, right? I’m here?”

Kakashi blows out his breath, slowly, the rage within him bubbling still. His voice is dark. “Thankfully, yes.”

Naruto blinks at him again, and then his face softens, a small smile on his lips. “Thank you for caring this much, Sensei.”

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, turning his head away for a moment. You have no idea. He nods, his voice scratchy when he speaks. “Always.”

Naruto giggles. “You’re going to yell at him, aren’t you?”

Kakashi pulls a face, tapping his foot, once. Glowering at Naruto. “You’re getting way too good at reading me.”

Naruto grins, and then gets up to make some tea, his cheeks flushed with… pride.

And something else.

Something… warm.

 

Kakashi sighs, and settles back, vowing to go by Jiraiya’s later. 

 

 

And yell at him, indeed.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He hammers on Jiraiya’s door in the shabby little inn he prefers to the Hokage quarters, not caring too much for the other guests. 

And not daring to doubt his impulse.

 

Jiraiya opens the door, eventually, looking vaguely peeved… and mightily amused. 

His voice drips with humor. “Kakashi. Anything you want?”

Kakashi grimaces, and then rudely pushes past him into the room, not waiting for an invitation.

Jiraiya closes the door behind him, turning to stand in front of it, silently. 

Kakashi points a finger. “You endangered him, endangered him even though knowing what it would do to m…” He trails off, staring unseeingly, his breath coming fast. He feels like screaming, but whispers instead. “Throwing him into a ravine, what the hell were you thinking.”

Jiraiya’s dark eyes are glittering, traveling over his shivering limbs. His voice is dark. “I needed to find the key to unlock his ability to access the fox’ chakra… you know that.”

Kakashi’s voice is a hiss. “He could have died.”

 

Jiraiya hums. “He had to think that he could have, yes.”

Kakashi blinks, some of the anger deflating. “What.”

Jiraiya shrugs, with a smirk. “There was another toad waiting below... He would have been caught.”

Kakashi looks away for a second, drawing a shaking hand down his face. Feeling mightily embarrassed, too. “Oh.”

Jiraiya’s eyes lock with his after a moment, seeing too much, with a smile on his lips. “Had a nice evening?”

Kakashi closes his eyes, remembering how right it had felt to hold Naruto. He shrugs, unable and unwilling to comment. 

Jiraiya steps up to him, leaning into his space. His smell envelops Kakashi, making him light-headed. It’s spicy, somehow. Jiraiya stares down at him, his voice dark. A caress. “Naruto’s new sexy jutsu is something else.”

Kakashi frowns, blinking rapidly, shaking his head once. “So I hear.”

Jiraiya tilts his head. “He hasn’t tried it on you?”

Kakashi blinks, shaking his head again. “No.” He clears his throat. “At least not yet.”

Jiraiya hums, reaching up to pull at a strand of Kakashi’s hair. “I wonder why.”

 

Kakashi exhales shudderingly, something coiling deep within him, there, and increasing, and twisting, and… and Jiraiya steps back, turning back to the door. 

His voice does carry some regret. “I’d invite you to stay…” His eyes burn into Kakashi’s for a moment. “But I need you to meet with Sasuke in front of the tea-shop on the market street tomorrow, to buy some gifts for the ones we lost.” He hesitates, tilting his head. “Maybe the Sandaime’s son and his soul-mate would like to come along…”

 

Kakashi frowns, trying to read between the lines. You want me to draw out Itachi tomorrow? He shivers, staring at the big Sannin for a long moment. 

His throat clicks when he speaks. “Naruto needs some company eating ramen.”

Jiraiya smirks. “Alright.”

 

He nods at him and then steps aside, and Kakashi opens the door for a moment, hesitating on the threshold. His voice is a whisper. “If something should…”

Jiraiya interjects, his tone firm. “I have faith in you.” He clicks his tongue. “But yes.”

 

Kakashi hesitates and then nods, leaving him, feeling… hollow.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He tries to keep his stance relaxed, tries to pretend to be just waiting. 

Itachi and another member of their group are sitting in the tea shop behind him, and Kakashi knows that Itachi knows.

He clenches his fists in his pockets, wondering about the sword on the weirdly looking man’s back. It comes with the scent of water, too, and an… aura of drain. He grimaces to himself, wondering why he is so lucky to draw another of the seven sword men as adversary. Or at least one bearing one of their swords. At least Asuma’s wind style isn’t explicitly weak against him. Though if Kurenai is strong enough to hold against Itachi’s genjutsu…

He sighs softly, insanely glad that Jiraiya is actually protecting Naruto right now, eating ramen, probably the only reason why the Akatsuki behind him do not go after the boy right now. 

 

The Anbu around the apartment the only reason why they probably didn’t go after him the evening before. 

 

He sees Asuma and Kurenai come up, slowly, their gazes careful. 

He keeps his voice light, teasing. “Yo. Hey there, you two… you’re so chummy? Are you on a date?”

He can see the corner of Kurenai’s eyes crinkle, her voice carrying amusement. “Fool, Anko asked me to buy her some dango.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, remembering Anko’s weakness for these particular sweets. 

Asuma raises an eyebrow, pretending. “What about you? What are you doing here? I thought you didn’t like sweets?”

Kakashi hums, wondering if upholding the subterfuge is doing anything good right now, with Itachi knowing already. But then he doesn’t know I’ve called Sasuke here, does he. It will be interesting to see how he reacts to that. “Well, I came to buy something to put on a grave, so I figured I’d just meet up with someone while I was at it.”

He can feel Itachi perk up a bit, listening intently. He narrows his eyes. “Sasuke, actually.”

There is a clink of the cup in Itachi’s hand hitting the table, just a bit too hard. Mhhh. Interesting.

Asuma chuckles, and it isn’t even fake. “That’s a rare sight, for you to be waiting for someone.”

Kakashi gives him a small eye-smile, then turns his attention to Sasuke, who has just arrived, staring at him. Behind him, Itachi doesn’t breathe anymore.

Sasuke’s voice is dry. “Whoa, Kakashi, you showed up before me?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Well, I can be, once in a while…”

There is a displacement of air as Itachi and his colleague vanish, the curtains of the shop fluttering for a moment. Sasuke stares at the now empty table, a frown on his face.

Kakashi smiles grimly behind his mask. So he only wanted to get a look, not really engage. He definitely isn’t here for him then. 

Kakashi shoots a look at Kurenai and Asuma, and they vanish too, and Sasuke stares, his eyes very big suddenly. “What…”

Kakashi grimaces, reaching out to clasp his shoulder for a second. “I’m sorry, Sasuke. There has been a change of plans. Please come with me.”

He tilts his head, and then starts walking down the street, a bit quicker than his normal pace.

Sasuke comes after him, his expression indecipherable, and Kakashi sighs through his nose. Did you recognize his aura there? Or did you feel him subconsciously? He nods at Ichiraku’s, where something orange and long white hair can be seen below the curtains. “I need you to stay with Naruto for a while.”

Sasuke frowns, his gaze darkening. “Why do I need to stay with this loser?”

Kakashi grimaces, not liking the tone, at all, but not in the mood or the position for a long discussion. “Just keep an eye on him.” That should keep you busy and close to him and Jiraiya. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

He hears Jiraiya laugh, loudly, waits until Sasuke has climbed onto the stool next to Naruto, his expression sullen. For a moment, his and Jiraiya’s gaze catches, through the gap between the curtains. They’ll be safe.

Kakashi nods, once, adrenaline starting to pump. Time to engage.

He jumps, following the bright scent of Asuma just outside the village.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“Suikodan no jutsu! Shark bomb!”

He mirrors the jutsu, canceling it out, sends a Kage Bunshin to hold a kunai to Itachi’s neck. Knowing it won’t do much in the long run.

Asuma’s voice is a bit peeved. “Why are you here now?”

Kakashi grimaces. “I know I asked you to take care of this for me… but I guess I got a little worried.”

Asuma snorts softly, under his breath, and Kakashi’s lips twitch. 

Itachi’s red eyes shift, locking with his. His voice is a mix of elation, disappointment, anger and memory. “Kakashi.”

Kakashi stares at him, noting the three tomoe. His eyes haven’t changed a bit… Did you not experience any tragedy that would top the one you left behind, hmm?  He narrows his eyes, shifting his stance just a bit. Still. He’s a true sharingan user… I have to expect the worst. 

Itachi stares at him, unmoving, his whole attention on Kakashi, ignoring Kurenai and Asuma. Good, good. Remembering my skills I see. 

His colleague smiles, sharp teeth flashing. “My, my, you’re a surprise… no wonder you stopped me. There is another with the eye…” He tilts his head, his sharklike visage beaming with glee. “You must be Kakashi, the copy ninja.”

I see my reputation precedes me. That’s good.

Kakashi inclines his head, just a bit. “I’m the one who was surprised… catching the scent of suspicious folk at the tea house… and who should it be…” He smiles sharply, letting the humor color his voice, knowing it grates. “I never imagined it would be Uchiha Itachi, and the scourge of Kirigakure, Hoshigaki Kisame.”

Kisame chuckles. “Well, well, you even know my name. What an honor.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “So that sword of you belongs to one of the swordsmen of the mist. Samehada, the sharkskin.”

Kisame grins at him. “I heard that young Zabuza sparred with you?”

That is one way to put it. Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Yeah.” And he lost.

Kisame’s eyes flash, interpreting his tone correctly enough. “I’ll cut you to ribbons.”

 

Itachi’s voice is quiet. “Drop it, Kisame. If you spar with him spot-on you won’t get away scot-free… and if you take too much time, you’ll give the other shinobi the chance to arrive.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, tuning him out, knowing Itachi is speaking of Jiraiya. He presses his tongue against a fang. So you really don’t want to be caught. That’s too bad.

His voice is hard. “What, pray tell is your purpose?”

Itachi shoots him a look, the red eyes seeming to glow. “We know that what we’re looking for is here.”

Kakashi breathes out, slowly. “Looking for.”

Itachi blinks, slowly, once. Kakashi starts, knowing this blink, this imminent sign of Itachi casting jutsus. You’re giving me a head’s up? Why?

Itachi’s voice is soft. “I, unlike Kisame, won’t take any time at all.” Kakashi frowns. So… a jutsu that has space-time components? But… normal ones first?

There is a moment of stillness, and then their water jutsus clash, Kakashi letting instinct rule his movements, letting the sharingan interpret. He shifts into doppelgänger after, using the water ones by Zabuza on a whim, shielding Kurenai when Itachi’s doppelgänger explodes. Separating them a bit more. You want them out of reach? Of… Kisame?

Itachi calls over, taunting him, and Kakashi knows that he’s smiling. “Let me show you my clan’s true strength!”

Huh. Another… warning?

Kakashi starts, his yell loud between them. “You two, don’t look him in the eye.” His mind is frantic, trying to interpret. You don’t want them to be caught in whatever genjutsu you’re building… why?

He listens to Itachi telling him that he can only be stopped by someone possessing the sharingan and the underlying kekkei genkai, listens to him tell him the exact jutsu he’ll use. He frowns, wondering if he could break out of it if he would choose to, wondering if Itachi’s words… are meant for Kisame.

 

He feels Itachi hesitate, for a split second.

Kakashi exhales, and locks their sharingans. Opens himself. Gives Itachi permission.

 

The wheels in Itachi’s eyes turn.

They… turn?

 

 

The world throbs, and is gone.

 

Itachi’s voice is soft, echoing through him. “In the Tsukuyomi dreamscape I completely control time, space and substance.” He hesitates. “For the next 72 hours, you will be continually be stabbed.”

Kakashi blinks, staring at him, hung from a cross. His throat is dry. “Why. You could kill me in here? Make me believe I’m really dead, which would kill me in reality?”

Itachi stares at him, hand raised to throw a kunai at him. “I could.”

The blade finds Kakashi’s gut, twists, makes him cry out. 

Itachi sighs softly and then coughs, once. Kakashi frowns, Itachi’s words drawing him back. “But you’re here voluntarily. We both know that.” He shrugs. “So, turnabout is fair play.”

Kakashi cackles, tasting blood. “That’s not all there is to this.”

Itachi smiles, softly, obviously suppressing another cough. “Of course not.”

Kakashi grimaces, bracing himself for another kunai, which finds his thigh. He gnashes his teeth. “So why.” And how long have you had that cough? Obviously long enough for it to be part of your subconsciousness, of how you see yourself. 

Itachi stares unseeingly, for a long moment. His voice sounds faraway. “Did you know, Senpai, that your visit with the jinchuriki tipped the scales?”

A shudder runs down Kakashi’s spine, remembering his own thoughts back then. His throat clicks. “I…” He trails off again, not knowing what to say. But you called me Senpai just now. What… 

 

Itachi smiles sadly. “Sasuke came home that night, telling of a sassy little boy with whiskers, who wanted to be friends with him. And an Anbu with a dog mask, guarding him.” Itachi looks away, twirling another kunai in his fingers. “Our father was enraged. He saw the fact that an Anbu was guarding the jinchuriki and leading him through the village as the ultimate affront.” He looks back at Kakashi. His tone doesn’t carry any inflection. “I knew you. I knew it wasn’t like that. He wouldn’t listen.”

Kakashi grimaces. “What happened then, Itachi. Who helped you?” His tone turns imploring. “I know you didn’t do this alone. I know Danzo is somehow connected to this, as was the Sandaime. Who…” He shakes his head, once. “What happened.”

Itachi blinks, and then throws the kunai into Kakashi’s arm. Right under his tattoo. His tone is wistful, eyes riveted to where the kunai cut the cloth of Kakashi’s garment. To the skin that can be seen underneath. “I know why you spent time with him then.” He quirks his eyebrow. “A match like that is a fitting punishment, too, don’t you think?”

He holds up his hand and coughs into it, harshly.

 

Kakashi gnashes his teeth, tries not to feel the pain from the wounds or the words. He tries to find another angle, to make Itachi talk. “The Sandaime told me he had a jutsu to flush the attacker out.” He hesitates, their eyes locking. “Did he… use it?”

Itachi snorts softly, looking away. “He did. But it was no use. The jutsu was mapped to those not of this village only.”

Kakashi blinks, dread settling in his stomach. “I… are you sure?”

Itachi tilts his head, a note of wonder and amusement in his voice. “I had thought Orochimaru had told you by now.”

Kakashi stares, remembering Orochimaru’s… vague hints. His tone is scratchy. “He… hinted.”

That brings a smile to Itachi’s lips, a mean little smile. “Ah.” He shrugs, once. “He likes to play.”

Kakashi grimaces, seeing another kunai in Itachi’s hands. “He also likes the prospect of possessing the sharingan. It’s why you drove him out of your organization, isn’t it.”

Itachi quirks an eyebrow. “Very good.”

Kakashi exhales, remembering something. “Did you really kill Shisui and take his eyes?”

Itachi freezes for a moment, staring down at the kunai. His voice is very quiet, almost inaudible. “I watched him die. The eye was a gift.” He raises his eyes to Kakashi. “Just like yours.”

Kakashi blinks, realizing the distinction. He swallows. “Who has the other?”

Itachi raises his eyebrows, and then throws the kunai into his lower arm, making him grunt. “The one who wanted all those eyes… you know who I mean.”

Kakashi tries to breathe through the pain, his limbs shivering. “The attacker.” 

Itachi tilts his head. Prompting. “And?”

Kakashi breathes the word. “Danzo.”

Itachi’s smile is sharp, and brittle. “Very good, Senpai.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long, long moment. “I am sorry.”

Itachi nods, and hums, and then shrugs. “I might need to take you along. There is something I need to confirm.”

Kakashi frowns, feeling increasingly light-headed by the blood-loss. “Confirm?”

Itachi shakes his head, once. “Even I don’t know everything.”

Kakashi snorts, and then chuckles, the smile dying on his lips again after a moment. “No, I guess not.” He licks his lips, tilts his head. “If you wanted to talk, why are you hurting me?”

Itachi smiles, softly, his eyes burning. “Don’t you know?”

Kakashi blinks, his mind racing. He shakes his head. “But… you cannot be pissed at me for being close to Sasuke?”

Itachi chuckles, loudly, and then calms again, his eyes flashing. The red eyes, seeing all. “No. I am pissed, because you were so occupied with your match, that you didn’t notice what was happening right under your nose.” He snarls, his voice heated. “And for letting this happen to me. You were my Senpai, my teacher, my… ” He trails off, swallowing compulsively.

Kakashi gasps, the tears gathering, his eyes closing. I am so sorry, Itachi. He nods, once. “You are right. Do your worst then.”

Itachi blinks, his voice gentle once more, controlled. “But that is not why I hurt you. I know none of it was really your fault, as you yourself were pushed into this situation. The… hurting just serves to make your brain give up your strength. This dream will reset when you are about to die, Senpai.” He hesitates, a weird undertone in his voice. “It will drain you a bit more on every iteration, on every kunai that finds its mark.”

Kakashi blinks. He raises his eyes to Itachi’s, locks them. “I… see.”

He knows Itachi knows he understands.

Itachi coughs again.

 

The next kunai finds Kakashi’s heart.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The sun is tickling his senses, the smell of home mixed with antiseptics promising awareness.

Kakashi opens his eyes with a small groan, everything hurting in phantom pain.

A nurse rushes over. “Easy, Kakashi-san, please lie still. Your chakra is still woefully low.”

He grimaces, even looking up surprisingly strenuous. “Can you tell me what happened to Guy-san, Kurenai-san and Asuma-san?” He frowns, trying to remember. I came out of the jutsu, Guy showed up, and then…

The nurse nods, taking his pulse. “They dropped you off here, no worries, they are fine.” She leans down, carefully adjusts the light sheet that serves as a mask while he is in bed, as per his distinct requests. They all know I insist on it by now… I’ve been here so often. She smiles at him, and then grins. “Your team has been by, repeatedly. Especially that blonde boy has been trying to get into your room. He’s even managed once or twice, but we threw him out again.”

He chuckles, and then frowns. “How long have I been out?”

The nurse notes his pulse in the chart and then leans in to fluff his pillow. “Almost five days.”

He stares at her. “Five… days?” That’s even worse than in the Land of Waves. He grimaces. That is exactly why you used that dreamscape, isn’t it? To drain me enough not to follow you? To track you? He gnashes his teeth. Dammit. 

He sinks back into the pillow, his eyes unseeing on the ceiling. But you gave me some invaluable information, too. He sighs softly. 

 

There’s a knock on the door, and Kakashi’s stomach flutters. 

He blinks, his body obviously recognizing the chakra signature without his conscious mind, a smile spreading before he can think about it. 

The voice is loud, and relieved. “Sensei.”

Kakashi chuckles. “Naruto. Do come on in.” He nods at the nurse, who mouthes ‘five minutes’ at him and leaves silently. 

Naruto skids up to the bed, his eyes glowing, his face exuding relief, and happiness and relief. His voice is calmer, with a smile in it. “Sensei, I’m so happy to see you awake.”

Kakashi gives him an eye-smile. “I’m sorry if I scared you.” And he means that, too.

Naruto’s smile fades just a bit, and he nods, once. “Yeah, well, that old pervert assured me it would be alright, but of course I wor… we worried.”

Kakashi blinks at him, his mouth twisting with mirth at Jiraiya’s nickname. He clears his throat. “Spending lots of time with him?”

Naruto shrugs, rolling his eyes, his voice slightly annoyed. “Some. I mean, he’s like, always close, you know? He shows up when I eat ramen, he sits somewhere under a tree when I train with Sasuke, and he even brought me vegetables once.”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows. “I see.” Thank you for keeping him safe, Jiraiya. He sighs softly, feeling the first tendrils of sleep reach for him again. Dammit. Itachi really kicked my feet out from under me. He opens his mouth, wanting to address Naruto, but falls silent, watching the boy stare intently at… what.

 

Kakashi follows the gaze, all the way to his own left upper arm, the moment the realization clicks making his gut drop out, punching his breath from him. He swallows, the air between them simmering with something unsaid, something fraught with realization. He frowns, feeling decidedly light-headed, trying not to let the rising panic show or color his voice. “Naruto, I…” I cannot tell you.

Naruto interjects, eyes riveted to the tattoo, his voice sounding faraway. “I had a friend once, who wore a tattoo like that.”

Silence, as Kakashi tries to breathe, tries to swallow past the restriction in his throat. Tries to ignore the taste of chocolate. A friend, huh?

Naruto continues, as if on auto-pilot, his face expressionless. “He would come by when I was still little, always wearing a mask. I think he was ordered to wear it. He taught me how to fish. And how to read and write. He made me clean, and brought me gifts. He brushed my hair. He…” He trails off, blinking rapidly, and Kakashi wants to reach out, wants to hug him, but he cannot, his whole being reaching out. And his tattoo burns. 

Naruto continues, his voice trembling. “His tattoo was also red, with a black line around it… the line was thinner though.”

And you noticed. Kakashi feels like crying, trying to find a way to deflect, to redirect Naruto’s thoughts, the seal fighting his impulse to just yell in confirmation.

Because he wants to.

He wants.

 

Naruto’s eyes snap to his, his voice a whisper. “He had similar hair like you do, too. And a pack of dogs he could call, too.” He licks his lips. “Or so he told me.”

Kakashi scrunches his eyes shut, his whole body shivering.

The taste of chocolate is overpowering now, encompassing his senses, burning his mind. His hands shiver. Oxygen is hard to come by. 

Naruto’s words reach him as if through a fog. “I asked Sakura about the tattoos once…” Naruto’s words begin to echo, as the world starts to spin, the chocolate in Kakashi’s mouth choking him. 

Kakashi’s eyelids flutter, the world rushing through a tunnel, faster and faster, his breath too quick now, too shallow. 

 

Naruto leans over him, the blue of his eyes the last thing Kakashi sees, his words the last thing Kakashi hears. Words that cut their way into his brain. “I wonder… his was the first…”

 

Blackness swallows Kakashi, blackness so absolute he cannot hear, or see, or taste.

 

But he feels, a touch, of a finger, on his forehead.

 

 

And then nothing.

 

 

Nothing, except yearning.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 17: Breath, drawn between clenched teeth

Notes:

Happy New Year's everyone!!

 

Kakashi tries to teach Naruto chidori in chapter 144 of the manga, in two more or less background panels. I always found that very interesting, because - despite Naruto complaining a lot - Kakashi must have known that that would be a fruitless exercise. But he caves nonetheless… ☺️

Also, some canon divergences, incoming :) But… will they change anything? And if so… what? 🙃😅

And I know you probably expected Naruto’s reaction here, but I...… well. 😅😈
There's also the tag "multi" on this fic now... for various reasons (later on).

Chapter Text

“Welcome back, sleepyhead.”

Kakashi grunts, grimacing at the taste in his mouth. 

He inhales deeply, and then sits up carefully in his bed, by sheer will, his muscles protesting, shifting to prop himself up against the wall. “Sora-san. So nice of you to drop by.”

Sora chuckles. “Guy-san was nice enough to let me in. He’s been keeping you company after the hospital deemed you fit enough not to be hooked to an IV anymore, but wanted to stretch his legs for a while.”

Kakashi nods, drawing a hand down over his face. He vaguely remembers Guy bringing him home at some point. “Yeah, he’s a great friend.”

Sora hums. “It’s good to have friends who care.”

Kakashi frowns, swallowing. “It is.” He clears his throat. “I wasn’t able to ask yet - how was your time with Sakura?”

Sora quirks an eyebrow, something in her face gentling. “Very good. The girl is as focused and talented as I hoped.” She chuckles, once, shrugging, with a sigh. “But genjutsu isn’t what she’s after. The training has improved her control of course, but she’s not interested in illusions.”

Kakashi grimaces a bit. “I’m sorry.”

Sora shrugs. “I’m not. She’ll find her way.” She quirks an eyebrow. “And with Tsunade-sama as the Godaime…” 

Kakashi nods, finishing the sentence. “She’ll finally have a proper role model.”

Sora nods as well, but her voice is dry. “Just keep her away from the gambling tables.”

Kakashi snorts, thinking about the legends he’s heard about the famed Sannin. He tilts his head. “I’ll try.” He blinks, leveling her with a look. “You’re leaving?”

Sora raises her eyebrows. “I am. I have to go back to Hachō-mura. I long for my life in obscurity.” She reaches out, clasps his knee through the blanket. “Do come to me and train with me, at some point, Kakashi. I think we can give you a bit more control of your eye.”

He chuckles, looking away for a moment, Mr. Ukki catching his gaze. “I… I’m not sure I can.”

She hums, correctly interpreting his gaze. “You’re not sure you want to leave him.”

He grimaces, a bit angry at himself but also aware enough to recognize the truth of it. “Yes.” 

She weighs her head. “Well, the offer is open to you, anytime. You know where to find me.” She stands up, holding out her hand, and he takes it after a moment, her hand feeling weirdly small in his. She smiles. “It has been a pleasure, Hatake Kakashi.” She leans in, her voice turning to a whisper. “Have fun falling in love over the next few years.”

He snorts and shakes his head, and she chuckles, giving his hand a small squeeze before withdrawing. He calls after her, quietly. “You were right.”

She turns back a bit. “Hmm?”

He grimaces, shrugging. “Regarding the Sandaime.”

She sighs, and then turns back to the door. “Unfortunately.”

The door clicks shut behind her, and Kakashi lets his head fall back against the wall, thumping it once. Indeed.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He almost expects Jiraiya to show up like Sora, but he actually knocks, the next morning. 

Kakashi calls him in, quirking a smile when the big Sannin sits down on a stool with a sigh, dwarfing the piece of furniture. “Jiraiya-san, so good to see you.” His gaze shoots to the door, wishing for a blonde head to show up. Are you alright? Where are you? What happened after I passed out?

Jiraiya grunts, quirking an eyebrow. “Just Jiraiya, please.” 

Kakashi grins, a brittle little smile, there and gone again. “Alright.”

Jiraiya sighs, shooting him a look, interpreting his gaze correctly. “He’s not coming here, he ran to me after you passed out at the hospital. I told him to keep away. I didn’t want to risk any more damage to you.” He hesitates, ignoring Kakashi’s instinctual grimace. “You might wish to collect your power reserves and drag yourself out of bed for a while though. You can rest again, after.”

Kakashi blinks, swallowing his disappointment down. “Why?”

Jiraiya pulls a face. “I’m going to leave to get Tsunade momentarily. And I’m going to take Naruto with me.”

Kakashi swallows again, his hand coming up to rub at his temple, where a sudden pain throbs. “I… see.”

Jiraiya sighs. “The village needs a proper leader, and Naruto…” He licks his lips. “Needs to take a trip.”

Kakashi blinks, his eyes flying up to Jiraiya’s. So Itachi is still around? “I… see.”

Jiraiya nods once, looking out the window for a moment. “The boy has to live and has to grow into his heritage.” He chuckles, eyes unseeing now. Kakashi exhales a shuddering breath at the emphasis he puts on ‘live‘. “He is so much like Minato and Kushina, it is scary.” Jiraiya swallows, looking down at the floor for a moment, before he raises his eyes again. “I’ve been staying close to him when I could, and have ordered Anbu to track him when I couldn’t.”

Kakashi nods. “Yes. I… know. Naruto came by while I was still in hospital, as you know. He told me.” He smiles softly. “Thank you.” 

 

He frowns, silently debating how to address the fact that Naruto might have connected the dots, but Jiraiya interjects, his voice calm. “Naruto told me that you seem to have a similar tattoo like his Anbu childhood friend.”

Kakashi grimaces, sighing heavily, but somewhat relieved Jiraiya knows already. “I think he might have connected the dots.”

Jiraiya hums. “I think so, too.” He narrows his eyes. “The boy may be a bit dense at times, but he is not stupid. Nor blind. I told him that there were lots of reasons why… this may be the case.”

Kakashi blinks, his eyebrows rising. “This… may be the case?”

Jiraiya shrugs. “Yes, the fact that you don’t talk about it. I think he understood well enough.”

Kakashi shakes his head, once, unable to think. Naruto… knows? “And… so?”

Jiraiya sighs, leaning close. “Kakashi… even if Naruto really has realized that you were that Anbu… I don’t think he has realized what your tattoo means yet.” He leans back again, spreading his arms. “I mean, how could he? His tattoo, his seal is black after all, it doesn’t have the same gradient.”

Kakashi grimaces, feeling the phantom touch of a finger on his forehead. “I… I’m not so sure about that.”

 

Jiraiya hums, his dark eyes glittering. “But even if he understood the implications, he does not know what the bond will be. Only time will tell, and it will drop into place when it engages. Until then…” He shrugs, and Kakashi grimaces. 

Jiraiya looks at him for a long moment. “Either way, I’m taking him to get Tsunade now.” He hesitates for a long moment. “And… if that works out…”

Kakashi closes his eyes, suddenly knowing what’s coming. His voice is a whisper. “If that works out, you’re going to take him on a longer journey.”

Jiraiya sighs softly, through his nose. “Yes.” He shakes his head once. "I will try to enable him to draw upon the fox‘ power at will… we definitely will need to be outside of villages in case something goes wrong though. And we need to keep moving for Itachi not to be able to track us down. At least until he‘s grown a bit into his own strength.“

Kakashi averts his face, something in him cramping, painfully. "You think he’ll be able to hold his ground against Itachi someday? And the Akatsuki?“

Jiraiya smirks, with a sly twinkle in his eyes. "I will do my very best.“

Kakashi exhales a shuddering breath.

Jiraiya clicks his tongue. “Now. Get up, get dressed, and go and spend some time with your team. With him. They’re on the roof of the building. You can sleep for a week when he’s gone.”

Kakashi nods, angrily wiping at his eyes, his voice a whisper. Picking the first thought that comes to mind to deflect. “Did you send someone out to deal out vengeance for the Sandaime?”

Jiraiya snorts, stepping up to the window and looking outside to give him some privacy. “No.” He crosses his arms. “Tsunade is the one who can decide on that.”

Kakashi nods jerkily, pulling on his pants. “I hope your trip goes well.”

Jiraiya hums, only turning when he hears the straps of the vest click shut. “I hope so, too. We have to get out of the village.” Before something else happens, hangs in the air unsaid.

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, gathers his strength. “Alright, lets go.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

“Come on, Sensei Kakashi!! Teach me chidori!”

Kakashi sighs heavily, knowing deep down in his gut that it’s just not in Naruto’s nature to master lightning affinity. At least not without learning a whole lot more about your own strengths. Maybe you will be able to convert some of your chakra into something else at some point. Maybe not.

Kakashi stares down into the glowing face, dimly noting that Naruto’s height is up to his shoulders now. I wonder if you’ll grow to be taller than me, one day. I’d always had to lean down to Iruka. He blinks, blushing heavily at the thought of having to tilt his head up for a kiss. And then banishes the thought, hastily. Clearing his throat. Baka. “Ahh, Naruto, this isn’t something you can force, you know.”

 

The tought comes with the fatalistic realization and grim acceptance of logic, mellowed by… what?

The other thing isn’t either, right. 

I hope?

 

I think. 

 

I… cannot let it be forced on you. 

I have to make sure you have a choice . 

 

At the very least. 

 

Kakashi shivers, draws a quiet breath between clenched teeth. 

 

Naruto stares at him, pouting, like that, unaware of Kakashi’s turmoil, his hair sticking up into all directions, and Kakashi… melts. With a lot of sardonic self-hatred. I‘m such a pushover when it comes to him… oh well. Whatever. He won’t be able to master it, but his memory of me won’t be telling him off at least. And if anything it might even be a help for the rasengan.

He nods once. “Fine. Collect your chakra in your palm. Infuse it with lightning and then let it dance along your bones. That is chidori.” He chuckles softly, his voice gentling. “Step by step.”

Naruto blinks at him, and then whoops once, loudly. He concentrates, holding his left wrist with his right hand the way he’s seen it Sasuke do. 

Kakashi grins. Clever boy. Though that's not your leading hand. He shoots a look at Sasuke, who is standing off to the side with Sakura, watching with dark eyes. Your mood has been rather foul lately… ever since the incident with Gaara. I probably need to watch out there.

He leans down to Naruto, pointing his finger to the middle of Naruto’s palm. “Right there, in the middle. Collect it there.”

 

Naruto’s face is pinched, and he vibrates with concentration, the tip of his tongue sticking out. Kakashi chuckles quietly behind his mask, nodding in encouragement. “Now, now, Naruto. Easy and steady. You have lots of chakra after all.”

Naruto grunts, the exertion of wanting to force his chakra into his palm making his cheeks puff. Kakashi shakes his head once. “No, Naruto, you cannot force it. Let it collect there. Trap it there.”

Naruto deflates a bit, shooting him a look. He blinks. “Like wind?”

I bet that is your affinity, isn’t it. Kakashi gives him an eye-smile. “For example, yes.”

He holds his hand under Naruto’s, opens himself to feel the energy.

And recoils, immediately, with a gasp, the jolt of perceived chakra and energy beneath like a whiplash. Oh my… He stares at Naruto, unseeing. I knew you had lots of chakra, but this… He shakes his head. This is more than Minato had. Even without the fox. He blinks, his thoughts drifting a bit. If you really train sage mode one day… you will be one of the Sannin then. Maybe the Sannin. 

He reaches up, ruffling Naruto’s hair when he groans. “Don’t get so easily frustrated.”

Naruto shoots him a dark look. “Well, I don’t have much time to master this, Sensei. That old pervert wants me to come and find some friend of his.”

 

Kakashi chuckles softly, shaking his head once. That’s one way of addressing the new Hokage I guess. “So I heard. And it will be good for you.” His hand drifts down, cupping Naruto’s cheek for a split second, before moving to clasp his shoulder. “You will learn a lot.” You will grow and experience things I cannot show you. Even more so should you really leave with him for a longer trip.

Naruto’s eyes light up. “Really?”

Kakashi grins, but it is a bitter one that he is glad Naruto doesn’t see. “Really.” That I can promise.

Naruto smirks, looking down at his hand for a moment. His voice comes haltingly. “Sensei, regarding my visit with you in the hospital…”

Kakashi interjects, tapping his finger into the center of Naruto’s palm once. “Naruto… lets not talk about this now, alright?”

Naruto blinks up at him. He licks his lips. “Not… now?”

Kakashi grimaces, closing his eyes for a moment. He frowns, and then lowers his voice, breathes the words between them. “We will talk about it all, at some point, I promise. If you want to, then. However…” He grimaces, and then chuckles, shaking his head once, heavily emphasizing the words. “I really cannot, now.” He wills him to understand.

Naruto stares at him, and then bites his lips, one hand coming up to hover over Kakashi’s hair for a moment. “Okay.”

 

A booming voice interrupts them. “Having a Tête-à-Tête?” 

Kakashi leans up, his hand dropping off Naruto’s shoulder, painfully. He shoots Jiraiya a withering look. “What?”

Jiraiya grins at him, and then down at Naruto. “I see you’ve been trying to collect chakra in your hand… that’s useful.” He shoots Kakashi a look, who shrugs. Jiraiya sobers slowly, inhaling deeply. “It’s time.”

Kakashi looks away for a moment, willing his emotions down. And the tears.

Naruto’s pout is back. “But Sensei Kakashi was just teaching me chidori.”

Jiraiya chuckles, shaking his head once. “Ah. Well, you will learn something… similar from me.”

Naruto’s eyes light up. “Really?”

Jiraiya hums, and then indicates Sasuke and Sakura with a tilt of his head. “Why don’t you say goodbye.”

Naruto grins and skids over to them, waving his arms.

 

Kakashi tries to breathe.

 

Jiraiya purses his lips. “You look like shit.”

Kakashi’s reply is acerbic. “Well, thank you, I feel like shit, too.”

Jiraiya nods, turning a bit to watch Naruto boast of his imminent journey to his friends. “I have promoted Tenzou as head of the Anbu for the time being. That should give him enough standing to hold his ground against Danzo.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “I know we haven’t talked about what Itachi has told you, but I figured we can do that when Tsunade is here.” He sighs. “I’ve instructed Tenzou to report to you, if needed.”

Kakashi nods, crossing his arms against the pain in his guts.

Jiraiya sighs. “I think Itachi and his friend will follow us out of town. Which is a good thing, it frees me to actually use my jutsus, which often take some… space.” He smiles grimly and then takes a step back as Naruto comes running back, gasping with elation. “Ready!”

Kakashi feels sick. 

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow. “Haven’t you forgotten something?”

Naruto blinks, and Jiraiya tilts his head towards Kakashi. “Always say goodbye to your Sensei.” His voice darkens just a bit. “You never know after all.”

Kakashi grimaces, behind his mask, swallowing the taste of bile down.

 

Naruto blinks up at him, with huge eyes. 

For a moment, neither of them says anything.

And then Kakashi clears his throat, reaching into his bag for the small gift he got the other day. On a whim.

He clicks his tongue. “Naruto, here, I got this for you, to… celebrate your summoning of that big toad.” He holds out the frog purse, the green body deflated still, empty. His throat clicks. “Take good care of it.” He swallows. “And yourself.”

Naruto blinks, hesitantly reaching out to take the frog purse from him. He holds it in his hands for long moments, and then looks back up to Kakashi, his voice small. “Does it have a name?”

“Uhh.” Kakashi shrugs lightly, wrecking his brain for a suitable name. “How about... Gama-chan?” He shrugs again. “A lot of the big toads are called Gama-something?”

Naruto grins, and then nods, his cheeks flushed. “Alright.” He grins at Kakashi. “Thank you, Sensei.” He grimaces, the blue eyes turning pleading. “Will you water my plants for me?”

Kakashi nods, frowning. “It will be my pleasure.” He exhales and then kneels down, opening his arms. Not giving a single fuck as to how it must look. “Give me a hug?”

Naruto grins, and falls into his arms. Holding tight. 

Bringing with him the scent of home, and summer, and sun. 

And the feeling of righteousness.

And a whispered word. “Sensei.”

 

From the corner of his eyes, Kakashi can see Jiraiya smile.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kakashi is quiet, eyes closed, listening to Guy and Asuma and Kurenai talk, there, standing around his bed. He’s in it once more, bedridden still after his little bout of overexertion there on the rooftop with his team, but he cannot bring himself to regret it, deeply thankful for Jiraiya for having kicked his ass up and to that roof to see them again before leaving.

To see him.

 

Because he knows that Jiraiya had wanted to leave. Immediately.

Had only been waiting for Kakashi to have enough energy to get out of bed for a while.

A fact for which he is extremely grateful.

 

 

Exhaustion also keeps the longing at bay. A bit. 

 

Asuma and Guy are discussing the fact that Itachi seems to skirt the village’s premises, wondering why, but Kakashi stays silent, not in the mood to explain a lot.

Because he knows why. 

He wonders why the others don’t recognize Jiraiya as the force to be reckoned with that he is, factor him in. Itachi doesn’t enter the town anymore, because Jiraiya is always around. And the Anbu are always around. He might make his move as soon as they are on their journey, in one of the surrounding smaller villages, but… He grins darkly behind his mask. But Jiraiya is expecting that. He swallows, realizing the truth of the thought. And I trust him. His mind stops on the thought. I… really trust him.

The door is flung open, and Sasuke stands there, eyes huge on the three jonin in Kakashi’s bedroom. Kakashi sighs, deeply. Doesn’t anybody ever knock?

As if on cue Ebisu throws the door open even more, his voice excited. “Is it true? Is Itachi here at an inn and looking for Naruto?”

There is a moment of time, when you could hear a pin drop.

And then Sasuke turns and runs outside, and Asuma curses, and Guy runs after Sasuke, and Ebisu mumbles an apology, and Kurenai groans.

 

And Kakashi… sighs.

 

Baka.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He drags himself to the hospital, the next day.

A nurse points him to Sasuke’s room, down the corridor.

He pushes the door open, and enters the room, watching Sasuke stare out of the window for a long moment.

He sighs, hobbling over to the window, sinking down into the seat next to the bed with a grunt. 

Sasuke ignores him, staring bitterly at the sunlight filtering through the leaves of the tree in front of his room.

Kakashi clears his throat. “So. I hear you tried to kill Itachi at an inn in the outskirts. Where Naruto and Jiraiya were, too.”

Sasuke’s mouth twitches, but he stays silent, glowering at the light outside.

Kakashi sighs again, stretching his legs out and crossing his ankles. He raises his hand, and lets a silencing seal snap into place. Sasuke frowns. Kakashi licks his lips. The words are surprisingly hard to shape. “Itachi… isn’t who you think he is.”

Sasuke’s eyes snap to his, but he snorts, his tone vicious. “Oh yeah? I distinctly remember him killing our parents.” His voice rises. “And my whole clan!!” 

Kakashi nods, sighing softly. “He was… pressured.” 

Sasuke scoffs. “Pressured.” He grimaces. “What kind of pressure could have possibly made him turn against his clan? Do something as atrocious as this?”

Kakashi sighs, closing his eyes for a moment. “The pressure of his commanding officer, the insurgent members of his own clan, and an outsider, helping him. Offering him a way out.” He swallows, his voice dropping. “He really didn’t have much of a choice.”

Sasuke stares at him, echoing. “Much… choice.”

 

Kakashi grimaces. “Sometimes, it’s not really the pressure itself, but more the absence of alternatives.” He hesitates, remembering Itachi trying to reach out back then, and not really knowing how. And himself, not knowing how to assure. Or what to do.

He shakes his head, once. “Itachi was caught between a rock and a hard place. If he hadn’t helped kill his clan the commanding officer would have killed you, and him. And the clan, in all likelihood.” He grimaces again, knowing deep in his gut that this is the utter truth. 

He hisses, closing his eyes. “If he hadn’t killed his clan the reactionary members of the Uchiha would have tried a coup d’etat. Which would have killed many more people, literally and factually putting the whole village at risk.” He swallows. “Itachi told me that… the fact that the Anbus were guarding Naruto was taken as an affront.”

Sasuke frowns, his eyes black and unreadable. “Naruto? Why?”

Kakashi reopens his eyes, locks their gazes. “You know why.” You have seen it. Felt it. 

Sasuke blinks. “Because… of that thing in him?” His voice grows hard. “That thing that organization that Itachi is in wants?”

That thing he wants more than me, hangs in the air, unsaid and stifling.

 

Kakashi sighs. "Yes. Because of that thing. The… bijou.“ There is no chocolate now. Kakashi snarls quietly, behind his mask. Only restricted me from talking freely with the one it matters most. Such madness.

They are silent for long minutes, with Sasuke grimly trying to wrap his mind around the new information. 

His voice is raw when he speaks again. "You… said there was an outsider?“

Kakashi smiles sharply. "Yes. The… Sandaime tried to flush him out, but… whoever that was knew his way around.“ Was from the village… He clicks his tongue. "Itachi hinted that Orochimaru knew him, too.“ He frowns, remembering the weird glee that Orochimaru exuded while teasing him. That weird feeling that… he might know that person. Or should know them. Kakashi sighs quietly, the vow old and almost tame in its absoluteness. If I ever get my hands on you… 

Sasuke pulls a face, draws in a shuddering breath. "This whole village is rotten.“

Kakashi cackles. "The system is.“ He exhales, in a rush. "But Sasuke… the system is always made by the people enforcing it. Certain people. Just as a village is all its inhabitants, not just a few. And it’s never bad as a whole. It’s unfortunately enough if you have a… few bad apples, which can sour the whole taste, so to speak. Itachi…“ He grimaces. "Tried to protect as much of this village as he could.“

 

Sasuke snarls, his eyes flashing. "Why not only the traitors then? The reactionary forces as you put it? Why all of the Uchiha?“

Kakashi shivers, reaching up to push his hitai-ate up. Watches as Sasuke’s eyes lock with his. Both of his. His throat is dry, his words a whisper. "Other than the Uchiha can wear the sharingan.“

 

Sasuke stares at him, for a long time. When he speaks again his voice is hollow. “You mean they stole the eyes?”

Clever boy. Kakashi swallows, harshly. “I know they did.” I was there.

Sasuke stares at him, eyes wide. His mouth twitches in an ugly grimace.

 

They are silent for a long moment.

Kakashi tries to swallow the bile down.

 

Sasuke speaks again, eventually, his voice raw. “Why would they take affront by Naruto?”

Kakashi sighs, deeply, looking out of the window for a moment. There’s no use telling him it was his own meeting with Naruto which apparently tipped the scales… “The Uchiha were, apart from the Uzumaki and Senju Hashirama, the only ones with the power to control a bijou.“

He quirks an eyebrow as Sasuke‘s attention snaps to him. "Your eyes, and Itachi’s eyes, and my eye, and a certain Anbu, with very special abilities, are the only ones left to be able to control these… demons in any kind of … safe manner. Supposedly.“ He swallows. "The Uzumaki used to be able to bind them, but they were… extinguished because of their powers, too.“  He tilts his head. "That’s another thing you and Naruto have in common.“ 

Sasuke frowns. “They had special eyes, too?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No, they…” He shrugs, with a chuckle, to which Sasuke shoots him a weird look. “They were very proficient in seals and had extraordinary life force and healing abilities. They were able to use a jutsu which would chain the bijou.”

He quirks an eyebrow. “Naruto has his stubbornness and his resilience from his mother’s side.”

And his power resources and looks from his father’s. 

For a moment Naruto’s face is overlaid with Minato’s in Kakashi’s memory, sending a shiver down his spine. Kakashi shakes his head, trying to clear it. 

Sasuke frowns again, shaking his head once. “But… why be affronted?” 

Kakashi sighs, deeply. The words taste like ash in his mouth. “That has historical reasons. The Uchiha… were feared and oftentimes rejected, simply because of their powers. Senju Tobirama was always very watchful of them, due to his own experience with Uchiha Madara. His mistrust widened the rift, even though the clan rejected Madara. When the Yondaime fought the nine-tails in the night of Naruto’s birth, the Uchiha offered to help. But they were rejected by the Sandaime, who had been Tobirama’s pupil. The clan elders withdrew, licking their proverbial wounds. And developed a rather unhealthy rejection of the jinchuriki and any note of controlling it.”

 

Sasuke obviously chews on all that, his face dark. He sighs, picking another information. “You said that the commanding officer was the reason why Itachi didn’t have a choice?”

Kakashi hums, shrugging again. “I believe so. I know that ninja had enough influence to go against some of the Sandaime’s wishes, too.” He grimaces. “Probably still has.”

Sasuke’s eyes snap to his. “He’s still… here?”

Kakashi smiles bitterly. “He is very good at this game, Sasuke.”

Sasuke snarls. “I’m gonna kill him.”

Kakashi harrumphs. “Well, you won’t be able to. Not for a long while.” He quirks an eyebrow. “Please believe me.” I may have never seen Danzo fight, but… I know Danzo was likely able to take Shisui’s eye… which speaks for skills that are far beyond yours. Maybe mine.

Sasuke’s voice is acerbic. “Who.”

Kakashi is silent for a long time. When he speaks again, the words come with the exhaustion of fatalism. “I won’t tell you. Not yet. If we make a wrong move now, we might never be able to take him down.”

“What.” Sasuke’s tone grates, dripping with hate. He gesticulates a bit wildly, his eyes suddenly red. “You tell me all this, and then expect me to just… wait?”

 

Kakashi exhales, with a shake of his head. Seemingly changing the subject. “I also have reason to believe that Itachi was poisoned.”

Sasuke stares at him, mutely, stunned into silence.

Kakashi locks their eyes. “Remember Hayate, at the chunin exams? He was coughing the whole time. Sensei Asuma told me a lot of the Anbu also cough from time to time… when I met Itachi the other day he coughed, too. Still.” 

He was also quite easily drained. Obviously not in top form. Kakashi grimaces, just knowing his hunch is correct.

 

Sasuke blinks, and then lowers his red eyes to watch his own fingers, on the blanket. “So. What happens now?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, reaching up to pull his hitai-ate down again. His voice is as tired as he feels. “Now… we train, and we get stronger, and… we wait for an opportunity.” Without risking developing a debilitating, potentially fatal cough. Or losing our eyes. He smiles grimly.

Sasuke’s voice is caustic, dripping with ire. “That’s not enough.”

Kakashi blinks, very, very slowly. “It will have to be. For now.”

Sasuke scoffs, looking away. 

 

Kakashi reaches up, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Sasuke… sometimes you have to play the long game. You cannot get stronger with the snap of a finger.”

Sasuke grunts, looking out of the window again.

Kakashi sighs, his voice very low. “Don’t hate Itachi.”

Another scoff from Sasuke, and a clenching of his fingers in the blanket. 

Kakashi grimaces. I know how it is to have no choice.

 

He shoots a look at Sasuke, at the pinched face. I cannot leave him alone now, with all of this…

He sighs again, and then settles a bit more into the chair, deciding to keep Sasuke company for a while, whether he wants it… or not.

 

 

 

 

When he wakes up in the chair with a hurting neck once more the next morning Sasuke is gone.

Kakashi curses.

 

 

Loudly.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He’s glad he finds Sasuke on training ground 5, practicing chidori. And throwing shuriken in between the chakra exhaustion enforced pauses. 

Sasuke ignores him, red eyes trained on the battered targets only. 

Kakashi settles below a tree, and keeps him company. Reading Icha Icha. 

 

In the evening he takes the exhausted and already passed out boy to his pristine apartment, puts him into the neatly made bed. 

Opens the clean windows, draws his fingers over the dustless furniture. 

The moonlight glints off the smooth surfaces. 

 

Kakashi frowns and decides to put one of Naruto’s plants here. 

 

Maybe two. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He picks Sakura up the next day, ignoring Sasuke’s pinched and angry face when he shows up at the training ground with her. 

 

He makes them train taijutsu, first the forms, then against him. 

 

Picking them both up in the evening is a bit of a hassle, but he manages, Sakura‘s parents fussing over her bruises when he drops her off at home. 

He refuses to apologize to them, his voice stern when he says: "It’s necessary.“

He doesn’t tell them why, their eyes suddenly huge on his. He grimaces, keeping his thoughts to himself. With the Hokage assassinated in our very own village we’ll enter a new phase soon enough. I would bet anything that I have time to train them now - and only now.

 

Sasuke groans when he puts him to bed, rolling over. His eyes open, and he frowns, a hand reaching out to hover over the leaves of the small plant, right next to his bed. 

Kakashi’s voice is stern. "Don’t let it die.“

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He walks the steps up to Naruto’s apartment, remembering one of the few instances when he did this, right before they found the doll. 

He smiles, shaking his head, once. Where are you now? Now, after you and Jiraiya have mastered the first test? After you’ve driven the enemy away… for now. 

He stops, frozen on the last step, a kind of belated panic making him shiver, the emotional understanding finally allowed to catch up to the intellectual one. 

What would I have done if Itachi had taken Naruto? He swallows. 

 

What could I have done?

 

He puts his hand over his face, feeling faint. And relieved. Thank god you were there, Jiraiya. 

He cackles once, the thought of how Asuma and Kurenai must’ve looked when Guy told them of the rather quick process the Sannin had made of Itachi and Kisame a definitely funny one. 

He sniffs, silently vowing to tease Asuma with it. Like hell. 

Guy though… Kakashi blinks. Guy went after Sasuke, and in with his gates ready to open, willing to fight both. Anyone. 

Kakashi exhales, a soft, real smile flitting over his face. What an awesome friend and brilliant human being you are. 

He draws in a deep breath and then steps up, and walks down the short landing to Naruto’s door. 

 

He smiles when he notices the shadow around the corner. Another great… friend. He quirks an eyebrow. "Hello, Iru-chan.“

Iruka chuckles softly, and steps out of the shadows. "Here to water the plants?“

"Mhh hmm.“ Kakashi shrugs, but gives him an eye-smile. "And you?“

Iruka weighs his head. "I… wanted to see how you are.“

Kakashi blinks and then looks away, the pain beautiful for once. He sniffs and unlocks the door, silently toeing his shoes off. 

Iruka flicks on the lights and they both survey the extraordinarily messy state of the apartment for a moment. 

Iruka starts to snicker, quietly closing the door behind them. "Is it just me or can you actually see the path through the cups of ramen and clothes?“

Kakashi tilts his head, tone dry. "Nope.“ He points his finger, maps the way. "There it is.“

Iruka pinches the bridge of his nose, shooting Kakashi a look. "Feeling the urge to burn it all down?“

Kakashi laughs, loudly, a real, deep laugh, for just a moment. He shakes his head. "Nawwww, I…“ He sobers, sighing. "I couldn’t do that to him.“

Iruka hums, shaking his head again. "Want to drink a tea with me and clean a bit?“

Kakashi’s mouth twitches. “You want to do him the favor and clean?”

 

Iruka sighs loudly, shrugging his shoulders. “Oh, well, I mean… I obviously didn’t manage to yell at him enough to clean himself, so…”

Kakashi chuckles, but the sound drops off his lips. His voice sounds a bit off, the feeling still raw. “He told me the other day that he’d wished we had adopted him.” He clears his throat, shoots Iruka a look. “Apparently Asuma had told his students about us.”

“Ah.” Iruka nods. “Well, we weren’t a secret, right.”

Kakashi swallows, shaking his head. “No.”

Iruka looks away, blinking rapidly. “I wonder though if it was more the idea that we could have…” He quirks an eyebrow at Kakashi.

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Yeah, well, let’s…” He gesticulates at the mess.

Iruka sighs, reaching down to pick up a dish towel from the floor. “Yep.”

 

It doesn’t take long, and it ends with Iruka indeed making tea, while Kakashi sweeps the dust. 

Iruka settles at the table with a little sigh, his eye on the small heap of clothes on the sideboard. “He doesn’t have that many clothes, does he.”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No, I think he was kept quite poor, money-wise.”

Iruka quirks an eyebrow, looks down at the wood beneath his fingers. “Think that’ll change with the new Godaime?”

Kakashi shrugs. “I don’t know. I never really met her, only heard of her.” He shoots Iruka a look. “She never had her own team, like Sora or Jiraiya did. If I remember correctly she withdrew from it all after her brother and her fiancé died.”

“Hmmmm.”

Kakashi shoots him a look. “What.”

Iruka shrugs, a bit sheepishly. “I just… I wondered if she really is still as powerful as back then, I guess. I mean, you hear a lot about the Sannins. But if she withdrew…”

Kakashi weighs his head, putting the feather duster away. “Well, Jiraiya seemed confident enough?”

Iruka hums, and then pours them both some tea. He lifts his cup, and blows away the steam, gently. He looks up at Kakashi. “You came here to clean tonight, didn’t you. Even if I hadn’t offered it?”

Kakashi shakes his head, his voice dry. “You really know me way too well.”

Iruka blinks. “Why?”

Kakashi shrugs, looking at all the plants on the kitchen window sill for a moment. “As compensation for putting up with Jiraiya?”

Iruka chuckles. “You think Naruto will suffer in any way?”

Kakashi snorts. “No, I know he’ll learn a lot.” He sniffs, sobering, while lowering himself into the opposite chair. He pulls down his mask after a moment, reaches for his cup. 

Iruka tilts his head, with a warm little smile. “There’s something between you.”

Kakashi blinks, clearing his throat. “Yeah, well, I mean, we have known that for a while…?”

Iruka shakes his head, with a chuckle. “No, I mean, between you and Jiraiya.”

 

Kakashi stares at him, and then shakes his head, once. “Ahhhh. No.”

Iruka grins, eyes sparkling behind the cup. “Yes.”

Kakashi blinks at him. “I really… no.” I… would have noticed. Right?

Iruka giggles. “Suit yourself.”

Kakashi grimaces, shaking his head. “You… really think so?”

Iruka shrugs, the smirk becoming… lewd. “I know he’s interested.”

Kakashi stares at him, with a bit of a flat expression. “Huh.” Refusing to feel… hot. And cold. Weird.

Iruka snorts, waving his one hand at him. “Oh come on, Kaka-kun, you cannot be this oblivious.”

Kakashi opens his mouth, and then snaps it shut again, his mind flatlined. “No, ahhh, I mean…” He tilts his head. “Jiraiya?” Interested? He shifts in his seat.

Iruka shakes his head at him, a bit of a flush on his cheeks now. “Imagine if he… employs the ideas he puts into his books in real life, too…”

Kakashi stares at him. Images flit through his mind, and scenes, and ideas, and…

Iruka laughs at him, quietly. 

Kakashi’s voice is faint, while he fights a deep blush. “I hate you.”

Iruka leans back and laughs, loudly, raising his cup. “You have to tell me, after.”

 

Kakashi blinks at him, for a long moment.

Iruka sobers slowly, taking a sip. “What.”

Kakashi shakes his head. “I just… I never expected us to sit here discussing something like this?” He raises his eyebrows, spreading his arms a bit. “I mean, it’s not as if anything even happened, I just…”

Iruka smirks. “Well, it’s no secret I like you?”

Kakashi snorts. “Ha ha.”

Iruka shrugs, slowly, with a sigh. “I… Seeing you with them, and seeing their progress has served to make me feel better with it all, somehow.” He grimaces a bit, his eyes wandering. “I really don’t know how else to put it.”

Kakashi looks down into his tea. His voice is soft. Gentle. “Your tattoo is still red?”

Iruka nods, the smile on his face vanishing slowly. “Yeah, I mean, I haven’t exactly been looking, either. But… “ He shrugs. The smile that returns is brittle. “You’re lucky that way. Knowing.”

Kakashi groans. “Oh please, not you, too.”

Iruka quirks an eyebrow and Kakashi sighs, deeply. “Both Sora-san and Asuma and Kurenai have been pointing that out to me.”

Iruka huffs, mumbling behind his cup. “Well, they’re right.”

Kakashi glowers at him, a bit, on principle. 

 

Iruka shrugs. And then points towards the bedroom door. “Tell me what you saw in there.”

Kakashi swallows, looking away for a moment. “A few dolls.”

Iruka’s voice is dry, pointing the finger at him. “A few Kakashi dolls.”

Kakashi doesn’t answer, his stomach churning suddenly.

Iruka blinks, and then starts to list them up. “There’s the big plush one, on the bed, apparently being cuddled with. There’s another big one in the corner, which is obviously used as a punching bag. There’s a small whittled one next to the goggles. There’s a crocheted one…”

Kakashi holds up his hand. “Alright, alright, I get it, what’s your point?” He points a finger. “And I have you know that all of that is just Jiraiya’s fault!”

Iruka quirks his eyebrow, pursing his lips. “Mhhh hmmmm.” He sighs, leaning forward a bit. “My point, Kaka-kun, is that you can hardly deny your connection.” He leans back again, spreading his hands. “It’s there. End of story.”

 

Kakashi sighs, deeply. He clicks his tongue, shaking his head once. “Naruto connected the dots. And told me before he left.”

Iruka stares at him, incredulously. “What?”

Kakashi chuckles, rather drily. “It was after Itachi’s little jutsu. He came by and told me of his Anbu friend. The damn seal made me pass out, can you believe it.” He snorts. “As if there’s really so much he doesn’t know yet.” He shakes his head. “Jiraiya thinks that Naruto may know it was me back then, but that he hasn’t really realized what it all means…”

Iruka frowns. “He doesn’t know of his heritage yet, either, right?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No.” His voice is a whisper. “Jiraiya says he looks so much like them back then it’s scary.” Like him.

Iruka hums. “And now you’re afraid what will happen when he comes back?”

Kakashi shrugs, with a groan. “I don’t know.”

Iruka frowns, watching his face. “How is not having him here? For you, I mean.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away. “Like…” A hole in my gut, tearing me apart. He suppresses the feeling, taking a sip of his tea. “Like a limb missing.”

Iruka’s big eyes watch him for a long moment. “I’m sorry.”

Kakashi snorts. “You’re sorry?”

Iruka shrugs. “I can’t really offer you any comfort.” He hesitates, looking away for a moment. “And I hate that.”

Kakashi blinks, and then gets up, silently starting to water the plants. 

Iruka watches him for a long moment, obviously letting him deflect. His voice is soft, understanding. "You‘ll stay here?“

Kakashi hesitates, and then shrugs. Refusing to be embarrassed or go and apologize for it. “Yeah.“

 

Iruka nods, and then gets up as well, stepping up to Kakashi, putting his hand on his shoulder. He hesitates for a long moment, and Kakashi knows that he is debating saying something else, but eventually he only says: “Sleep well.”

Kakashi inclines his head, nods, once.

 

The click of the door echoes, somehow.

 

 

 

The Kakashi plush doll is really quite worn already, almost matching the battered one in the corner, from which the filling spills out of in several places. 

Next to it is a half done Sasuke one, and Kakashi grins, and then grimaces, wondering.

He turns back to the one on the bed, pushes it over to the side.

 

 

Lays down and stares at it, mind carefully empty, until exhaustion claims him. 

 

Dreaming of a dead Sensei and his wife, his nose full of a smell he associates with… home.

 

 

A last thought, tugging at his consciousness.

 

Fatalistically, but coming with humor also.

 

 

 

 

I’m so doomed.

 

Chapter 18: The past that haunts us

Notes:

Chapter tag: mentions of suicide (Kakashi’s father).
And mentions (hinted at) of child abuse.

I’ve said it before, and it’s obviously no secret that I didn’t like the Sandaime much, re-watching and re-reading. A lot of the why is going to be discussed here. A part of it is that Orochimaru chose to… show his “young” face to confront him - remember that? It weirded me out then… but sent shivers down my spine re-watching. It doesn’t get better in the manga, where that face is even more beautiful imho.
This is where the tag “dark themes” and “trauma” come fully into play (not that… the events before didn’t carry that note, too, but… just as a heads-up.)
I’m insinuating heavily here, but there won’t be any details.

And: mini-reference for the Boruto time-slip arc. That said, this fic won’t be close to -Boruto- canon (in contrast to -Naruto/Shippuden- canon), it’ll branch off before that. But SOME parts of it will be.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

Kakashi feels his presence, like a breath of fresh air, coming with liquid relief, seemingly turning his bones to jelly.

He silently steps up to Jiraiya, who is staring down at the names of Minato and Kushina, there between the graves. He tries to calm his treacherous heart.

The morning is sunny, belying their surroundings.

Belying the freshly buried ones.

 

Kakashi cannot help himself, he smiles. Broadly. “Jiraiya-sama.” 

Jiraiya tilts his head, tone dry. “Didn’t I tell you to drop the ’sama’ And the ‘san’?“

Kakashi chuckles, shrugging once. “Sorry.” He inhales deeply, as relieved as anxious suddenly. “Was your trip… successful?”

Jiraiya turns to him, smirking. “You want to know whether we’re all here, safe and sound? With the new Hokage?”

Kakashi glowers at him, just a bit. “Well, yes.”

Jiraiya chuckles, before shrugging. “Well, yes.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes at him. 

Jiraiya holds up a hand, his voice dripping with humor and yet vaguely apologetic. “Alright, alright. Yes, we were successful. I have brought Tsunade to the Hokage mansion. She and Shizune want to freshen up a bit before they brace the elders.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, glad he doesn’t have to to that, the council notoriously known for being very good at playing the political games - and for being just as sharp-tongued.

Jiraiya sighs, looking up at the sun for a long moment. “As for the boy…”

Kakashi’s eyes snap to his, his mouth is dry. He doesn’t dare to feel. “Yes?”

Jiraiya smirks and tilts his head, shooting him a proud look. “He did manage to learn the rasengan. And he went and won Tsunade’s heart in the process.”

Another wave of relief, so potent the world drops away for a moment. Kakashi exhales, his voice a whisper. “That’s good.”

 

Jiraiya hums. “Indeed.” He snorts. “We had a small run-in with Orochimaru and that Kabuto… Tsunade had poisoned me and so I was a bit handicapped…” He waves off, seeing Kakashi’s look. “Long story, she can be sneaky that way. Anyways, he not only held his ground against Kabuto, he also defended Tsunade… and broke through her trauma.” Jiraiya smirks softly. “Orochimaru and Kabuto managed to flee, but… It’s been a hell of a trip.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, trying to wrap his head around all these new information. “I see.”

Jiraiya hums again, looking back and down at Minato’s grave. “How is the Uchiha boy doing? His run-in with Itachi at the beginning must have left some impression?”

Kakashi grimaces. “We’re both still suffering from that jutsu Itachi put us through. It’s robbing us of our sleep, has us easily exhausted still. The doctors don’t know how to fix it. We’ve been in and out of the hospital. I’ve…” He shrugs, his throat clicking as he speaks. “I’ve nonetheless put him and Sakura through the physical paces. Exhaustion or not. With so many shinobi dead…”

Jiraiya nods, exhaling loudly. “Good thinking. The chance they will send you onto certain missions is rather high indeed.”

Kakashi grimaces, behind his mask. “What is Tsunade’s stance on this?”

Jiraiya weighs his head. “She is a healer by nature, but she also has a temper, and she is one of the Sannin.” He licks his lips. “If she does not retaliate it will be seen as a weakness by the other villages - and a lot of people in the Leaf. She knows that. So I think she will probably choose wisely… but retaliate nonetheless. If there aren’t further developments, that is.”

Kakashi exhales, feeling extremely tired suddenly. “I understand.”

 

Jiraiya nods, his eyes unseeing on the graves. He suddenly chuckles. “Naruto won a bet against Tsunade.” He grins, shooting Kakashi a look. “Which doesn’t sound like a big feat considering her status as the big loser, but given the stakes…”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow in inquiry. 

Jiraiya grins. “Naruto is now wearing the necklace of the first Hokage. Because he managed to learn the third phase of rasengan in one week.”

Kakashi blinks. “One… week.”

Jiraiya nods, smirking at him and then at Minato’s gravestone. “Uh huh. The first two phases were more difficult for him, I think because it is more the basic control, while the third is manipulation. With two kinds of chakras in him that was to be expected.” He grins. “I had to frequently leave him alone with a toad as a guard to get information whether anyone from Akatsuki was near or had be seen, and he never stopped training on his own, often to exhaustion.” He snorts. “He does have a mouth about him though.”

Kakashi shoots him a look, not daring to comment on that.

Jiraiya rolls his eyes. “Alright, you’re probably not wrong, the pot calling the kettle black there, I know. Still.” He bends down and traces both Minato’s and Kushina’s names for a moment, before he turns, stepping quietly away and towards the village. Kakashi follows him silently. 

“He went and stuffed all his money into that toad purse you gave him…” He shoots Kakashi an amused look. “Nice one, by the way!” Kakashi blushes, just a bit, and Jiraiya chuckles. “However, I thought it prudent to take it from him and make sure that I would be the one paying the bills… I bet he would have spent it all otherwise.”

 

Kakashi smirks, shaking his head. “You’re probably right.” He frowns, going through the narrative. “So you moved a lot?”

Jiraiya nods. “Yes, we never stayed in one place longer than a few days. I had heard where Tsunade was said to have been seen at some point, and we… kind of converged to that location. Via a lot of stops in between in order to throw people off if needed. Fortunately that wasn’t necessary.” He grumbles something under his breath and then shrugs, answering Kakashi’s frown. “Orochimaru wasn’t there for Naruto. He was there for Tsunade. He wanted her to heal him.” 

Kakashi tilts his head. “Heal him?”

Jiraiya hums. “Mhhh hmmm. Apparently the Sandaime managed to pull the part of his body’s chakra that enables him to use his hands for jutsus out and sealed it with him.”

Kakashi blinks. “So that is why he used that particular jutsu.”

Jiraiya nods, turning onto the path leading into the market district. “Still. Quite a… self-inflicted judgment.” 

Kakashi frowns. “You think he wanted to atone? On some level?”

Jiraiya shrugs. “Maybe?”

Kakashi exhales softly, his voice dropping. “Will we talk about what he would atone for now?”

Jiraiya smiles sharply. “Soon, yes.” He shakes his head, once. “Now, go and get that Uchiha boy and wait at the hospital. I’ll send Tsunade by to heal your exhaustion.”

Kakashi frowns, his voice carefully neutral. “Just like that?”

Jiraiya’s smile gentles, pride mixing in, and something else that Kakashi cannot quite place. “She’s the best.”

“Okay.” Kakashi swallows, vaguely disappointed he cannot go somewhere else now. 

Jiraiya shoots him a knowing look. “I told him I’d take him out for his beloved ramen at Ichiraku’s later. Why don’t you happen to come by on accident at around 7pm?”

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head. And then he nods, his stomach churning. “Alright.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He’s not sure what he expected, but the light-ash-blonde, hazel-eyed, pig-tailed young kunoichi with the big breasts and Senju Mito’s seal on her forehead coming into his room with quiet but sure steps isn’t it.

He blinks, regrouping for a moment. Wishing he had had more time to talk with Sasuke beforehand, but Sasuke had only shown up seconds before. 

 

He bows down now, waving at Sasuke to do the same. “Tsunade-sama. Thank you for coming by.”

Tsunade puts her hands to her hips, looks at him for a moment. Her gaze swivels to Sasuke, and then back. It’s direct and almost uncomfortable in its weight. 

Kakashi blinks, the thought coming with a bit of humor. She’s not one for bullshit. Though… if she’s friends with Jiraiya…

Tsunade steps up to him, one hand coming up to raise his head with the tip of her finger under his chin. Her eyes seem vacant for a split second. “I see your chakra system has been tampered with rather thoroughly.” She shoots Sasuke a look, reaching out to touch his skin for a moment as well. “So has his.”

Kakashi nods. “Yes, we have had a run in with a jutsu called Tsukuyomi.”

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow. “That is one that is exclusive to those wearing the Mangekyo sharingan.”

Sasuke’s voice is harsh, hard, interjecting. “Mangekyo?”

Tsunade’s gaze turns to him, making him visibly gulp. “Yes. It was something I saw often during the war.” She frowns. “Even with the Uchiha now almost extinct there should be some documentation on this subject in the archive.” She shoots Kakashi a look. “Do you have the Mangekyo as well?”

Kakashi blinks, silently pushing his hitai-ate up. “I don’t believe so.”

She reaches up, places two fingers under his eye for a moment, softly pressing. She frowns, her tone carrying a note of chastising. “You need to train it. There is something there that is creating friction.”

Kakashi grimaces, feeling mightily embarrassed suddenly. He clears his throat. “I… had planned to do that.”

She quirks an eyebrow at him, and then turns to Sasuke. “Show me yours.”

Sasuke pulls a face and then his eyes flare up, the two tomoe aligning. 

Tsunade’s voice is calm. “Two tomoe already. I see.” She turns back to Kakashi, with a small sigh. “Alright. Jiraiya has asked me to heal your chakra system.” She raises her hand, green chakra glow around it. “Hold still.”

She presses it onto the crown on Kakashi’s head, not waiting for an answer. 

It feels… weird. Kakashi gasps, something snapping back into place, like a sinew over bone. Just worse. Tsunade’s other hand flies out to steady him, with the strength of an iron tong. “Easy. Almost done.” Another twinge that rushes through him, and Tsunade walks him back, to the bed. “Lie down for a moment. Your chakra levels will now rebuild properly.”

She waits until he does so, and then turns to Sasuke. “Now you.”

Sasuke glowers at her, but steps up dutifully, head lowered. She frowns, her palm pressing down. “It’s not as bad for you, thankfully.” Sasuke gasps quietly, and she pats his head. “There. All done.”

 

There’s a moment of silence, where they all just look at each other. 

Tsunade clicks her tongue. “Uchiha Sasuke, you’re all done. Why don’t you go train some more.”

Sasuke glowers at her. “And who are you to give me these orders?”

Kakashi grimaces, expecting a dressing down, but Tsunade surprises him, her expression filling with delight suddenly. Her voice changes from business to… teasing. “Well, your Godaime Hokage, of course.”

Sasuke stares at her. And then blushes, heavily. Stammering. “I… I didn’t…” He breaks off, his face locking in a pinched expression that Kakashi knows is anger. His words turn icy. “I hope you go and clean up this rotten hole of a village.”

A pause, as both adults stare at him, a bit wildly. 

Kakashi pushes himself up, grimacing. Dammit, Sasuke.

Tsunade’s eyes swivel to Kakashi’s for a moment, and then back to Sasuke. She opens her mouth, and then closes it again, her eyes narrowing. When she speaks, it is a lot calmer and kinder than Kakashi expected. “I know the past haunts us all. But I am not the Sandaime, Uchiha Sasuke.” 

He blinks at her, frowning. 

She tilts her head to the door. “Off you go.”

 

Sasuke pulls a face but leaves, shoulders locked. Throwing the door closed behind himself.

Her voice is dry. “He’s a handful.”

Kakashi sighs. “He’s been through a lot.”

Tsunade hums, turning back to him. “So I heard.” She hesitates for a moment, and then sits down on the edge of the bed, next to him. Kakashi inhales, the smell of vanilla and black currants mixed with mandarine and some wooden note tickling his senses. “I meant what I said. I am not the Sandaime. Nor will I follow his path.” She hesitates, shooting him a look. “I know of your seal.” She sighs, heavily, drawing a hand over her face. “Mine released. But I guess Jiraiya told you that already. We…” She shrugs, a painful smile on her lips. “We can talk about it all in a little while.”

Kakashi nods, swallowing. “I would be grateful.”

Tsunade hums, nodding to herself. “Jiraiya said you should become Hokage after me.”

Kakashi blurts out, loudly, and uncaringly. “WHAT??” He shakes his head, a bit wildly. “Nooooo, thank you, but no.”

She grins, bumping into him softly with her shoulder. “That is exactly why.”

Kakashi groans, recalling Kurenai saying something similar. “I… really am nowhere your level. Please don’t.”

She chuckles, and then snorts, her laughter infectious. Even if he really is not in the mood right now. She sobers again, after a moment, shaking her head. “No worries. I’ll do this job for as long as I can. In a way, this is my inheritance.” She shrugs. “Still. It is a relief to know that Jiraiya finds you a suitable successor.”

Kakashi puts his faces in his hands. And groans.

Tsunade snickers and then sobers once more, her tone turning wistful. "He also said I should keep to you and your friends, to find the ones to trust.“

Kakashi swallows, the words stuck in his throat. "That is…“ He hesitates, shooting her a look. "Quite the note of confidence, right there.“

She smiles a bit sadly, but nods. "It is.“

 

They are silent for a moment, while Kakashi dwells on the standing Jiraiya put him in. The responsibility coming with it. Dammit. 

Tsunade shoots him a look. "So. That little rascal of a boy is your soul-mate?“

Kakashi snorts. "Apparently.“

She quirks an eyebrow. "Not happy?“

He levels her with a bit of a withering look. "Do I really have to explain?“

She shakes her head. "No.“ She smiles softly, painfully. "Still. He’s alive, and we will all fight to keep him that way.“ Not like my own, hangs in the air, unsaid. 

Kakashi swallows, silent, her pain tangible. 

She exhales slowly, her eyes unseeing. "Did Jiraiya tell you of the necklace?“

He inclines his head. "He did.“

She tilts her head, her tone wistful. "It was my grandfather’s. It contains some of his essence. I have…“ She grimaces, her fingers twitching. "I gifted it to two other people before…“ She sniffs. "I hear third time‘s the charm.“

Kakashi blinks. Two people. Her brother and fiancé, likely. 

She sighs softly and then pushes up, nodding at him. "I hope I have your support, Hatake Kakashi.“

He inclines his head, giving her a wink. "Well, absolutely. You have to like this job after all.“ So I can stay out of that chair. 

She grins, and turns to the door. "Well. Come by tomorrow evening with Jiraiya? We can talk some more then. I‘ll order some food.“

He nods, gratefully. "I will be there.“

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto’s face lights up, like the sun, when he sees him. "Sensei!“

Kakashi smiles at him, widely, blinking against sudden tears. He clears his throat, tries to seem nonchalant as he slips onto the stool next to Naruto. "Back at Ichiraku’s I see.“

On the other side of Naruto Jiraiya grins and the noisily slurps his broth, smacking his lips after. "The ramen here are indeed the best.“

Naruto giggles, looking up at the cook behind the counter for a moment before his eyes return to Kakashi. "They so are. Sensei, this trip has been such an adventure!!“

Kakashi nods, unable to stop smiling. "So I heard.“

Naruto hops up and down on his seat for a moment, gesticulating wildly. "Oh, Sensei Kakashi, you should‘ve seen… there were these huge summons, a snake, a snail and a slug,“ Kakashi shoots a look at Jiraiya, who just shrugs, "and baa-chan gave me this necklace when I managed to win the bet, and I fought this ass with the glasses, and he stabbed me.“ Kakashi shoots another look over Naruto’s head, this time definitely with heat. Jiraiya grins saucily, and returns to his bowl. "And Ero-Sennin here got himself poisoned, and I saved baa-chan and so we successfully managed to bring her here.“ 

Kakashi blinks. "Baa-chan?“

Naruto nods enthusiastically. Grinning broadly. "Yeah, the blond lady. She’s as old as Ero-Sennin and pretends to be young, but I call her that anyways.“

Kakashi stares at him, not knowing what to say. Jiraiya snickers into his soup. 

Naruto blinks up at him, expectantly. 

Kakashi sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. "You do know that that ‘baa-chan‘ as you call her is the Godaime Hokage?“

Naruto rolls his eyes. "Yeah, I mean, I convinced her?“

Kakashi narrows his eyes. "You convinced her.“

Jiraiya chimes in, tone happy. "He did.“

Kakashi blinks, looking away for a moment. The power you wield already. He sighs, shaking his head once. "Quite a trip you‘ve had then.“ His tone softens, colored by his relief. "I‘m glad you’re back.“

Naruto grins at him, but then the smile breaks a bit, a shadow of guilt crossing his features. "Yeah, but…“ He looks up at Jiraiya, who nods. "But I will only be here for about a month… Ero-Sennin will take me on a longer trip then.“

Kakashi swallows, willing himself to keep the pain from his voice. "Yeah. I… know.“ He makes himself smile. "That will be very good for you.“

Naruto gnaws on his lower lip for a moment. He frowns, but doesn’t ask for confirmation, nodding only, once. 

 

Kakashi clears his throat. "I kept all your plants alive.“ He raises a finger when Naruto wants to interrupt. "But I gave one to Sasuke.“

Naruto blinks. "To Sasuke?“

Kakashi shrugs. "He needed it more than you.“ Out of the corner of his eye he can see Jiraiya quirk an eyebrow. 

Naruto frowns but shrugs. "Yeah, well, ok.“ He hesitates, looking up at Kakashi imploringly. "Will you care for them once more when I‘m away again?“

Kakashi frowns, heavily. "I… am not sure I can. I will likely be sent on some missions.“ And training. More than likely. 

"Ah.“ Naruto looks down into his empty bowl, a pout on his lips. 

Kakashi grimaces. "I‘m sorry. But I bet you can ask Sensei Iruka?“

Naruto shrugs, a bit listlessly. 

Kakashi clears his throat, wanting to hug Naruto, badly. He clicks his tongue, makes his tone light instead. "We could go fishing though?“ You already know so why not. 

Naruto’s eyes blink up to him, impossibly blue in the light. His voice is soft. "I‘d love that. S…“ He blinks, his gaze locking with Kakashi’s. Making the meaning of the change clear. "Sensei.“

 

Kakashi’s heart beats in his throat. 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He walks through Konoha with Jiraiya later, after an evening spent with Naruto and Jiraiya, laughing, and eating sweets he doesn’t even like. Just being.

The moon is full, and Naruto is snoring in his bed, where they put him when he fell asleep standing up, and where he is now hugging the darn plush. 

Kakashi is feeling suspiciously happy, all things considered. 

 

Jiraiya grins at him. "So. Fishing?“

Kakashi shrugs. "Well, he already put two and two together, no need to refrain doing something we both seem to like?“

Jiraiya smirks. "Naruto and fishing though?“

Kakashi chuckles. "You‘d be surprised.“

"Hmmm.“ Jiraiya shakes his head, tone fond. "He‘s secure enough in his recognition of you to tease… I almost choked on my ramen earlier.“ He quirks an eyebrow. "What name did you use back then?“

Kakashi exhales softly. "Sukea.“

Jiraiya laughs, loudly. "Oh you little shithead.“

Kakashi blushes. "Well it’s just an abbreviation of my name in a way… it was the only thing I came up with back then.“

Jiraiya snickers, shaking his head at him. 

Kakashi chuckles, and then sighs. "Think the Godaime will go after him for calling her baa-chan?“

Jiraiya snorts. "Naaawwww. She pretends to be annoyed, but secretly she loves it.“ He shoots Kakashi a look. "Just like you!“

Kakashi glowers at him. On principle. And then sighs again, his tone just a bit more earnest. "Quite the position you put me in with her… Making me character reference and successor there.“

Jiraiya‘s head swivels round. "Oh? So you accept it?“

Kakashi stares. "Wha…? NO, I…“ He grimaces, shaking his head once. "No, definitely not. I just meant that I do feel the responsibility you pushed on me.“

Jiraiya hums, weighing his head. "Mhhhh. You are Minato’s pupil, and the one destiny has chosen for Naruto.“ His dark eyes seem to bore into Kakashi for a moment. "You are the one who has to be where you are.“

Kakashi blinks. "And what the hell does that mean.“

Jiraiya shrugs, and looks up to the moon. "We‘ll see.“ He exhales loudly, and then chuckles, but his gaze is dark. “The moon always looks a bit like an Hyuuga’s activated eye, doesn’t it?”

Kakashi frowns, looking up at it for a moment, irritated by the abrupt change of subject. “Well…” A bit? But not really?

Jiraiya hums. “I have a recurring dream, ever since we came back, two days ago. Several times a night. Of a light-haired boy bearing two whiskers… and a dark haired man, with weird purple eyes.” His voice drops into a whisper for a moment. “Eyes that I have seen only once before.”

Kakashi’s frown deepens, his stomach churning. A dream? “Two whiskers… that means the child would be second generation jinchuriki descendant.”

Jiraiya hums again. “And somehow it is all connected to pale eyes. And time, that wasn’t.”

Kakashi grimaces, frowning deeply. Tries to not let the bitterness at his thoughts trying to make sense of it all rise. And fails. If that is a suppressed memory… then Naruto will have a child one day. A biological child. He looks away, unwilling to look at Jiraiya right now.

 

Jiraiya is silent for long moments, obviously trying to give him some space.

When he speaks at last, it is careful and gentle. “Look at it this way, Kakashi. At least you’ll know he’ll grow to have a child… If I’m not delusional that is.”

Kakashi scoffs, harshly.

Jiraiya sighs, softly. “Nothing in this world is ever easy.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “And yet it is worth fighting for.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away. 

 

Jiraiya’s voice sounds faraway, echoing. “The children are the future, after all.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“Jiraiya-sama. Kakashi-san. Please do come on in.”

Kakashi bows to the dark haired woman with the little pet pig in her arms, who opens the door for them. That must be Shizune. “Shizune-sama. It is a pleasure to meet you.”

She smiles, blushing a bit. “Shizune, please. Come on in, Tsunade is waiting for you in the courtyard. Since it is so nice tonight we thought we could eat on the porch.”

Jiraiya claps his hands together. “That’s a splendid idea.” He holds up the two bottles of sake he brought. “I went and got her preferred sake.”

Shizune groans a bit. “I see.” She sighs. “Thank you, Jiraiya-san.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow at the tone, vaguely amused. Now, there’s history, right there. 

Shizune sighs again, and then turns to walk towards the living room, and then through it, with Kakashi and Jiraiya following quietly. 

Kakashi shoots Jiraiya a look, but Jiraiya only grins, obviously not taking any offense.

 

Shizune opens the door to the living room, stepping aside to let them in, the outer doors to the courtyard pushed open all the way already. Tsunade is standing off to the side, watching the water trickle down into the small pond in the center of the small but beautiful garden.

She turns, her expression clearing when she sees Jiraiya, and it makes Kakashi relax, instantly. “Jiraiya, Kakashi. Thank you for coming by.” She extends her hand, and indicates the table that has been set up a few feet away. “I hope you like barbecue.” 

Kakashi nods, once, and then settles down into the place Shizune indicates, when she steps up to the table as well. He looks around the room, wondering where the pig is. 

Shizune smirks softly. “Tonton is in the other room. She doesn’t like barbecue, for obvious reasons.”

“Ah.” Kakashi pulls a bit of a face. “I understand.”

Jiraiya lowers himself into the seat across from him with a loud sigh, patting the seat next to him with a grin up at Tsunade. “Come, I won’t bite.”

Tsunade snorts, but there is a twinkle in her eye. “Still the old pervert I see.”

Jiraiya’s grin broadens. “Just upholding the reputations.”

“Uh huh.” Tsunade settles down, smirking at him for a moment before nodding at Shizune. “Would you be so kind and keep an eye on the food today? Distribute it from time to time?” She sighs, and her expression darkens a bit. “I think we’ll forget at some point.”

Shizune nods and Jiraiya indicates the two bottles of sake he put at the edge of the table. “Something to loosen our tongues.”

Tsunade smirks softly, but it is a sad one. “Good thinking.”

Something flutters in Kakashi’s stomach. He clears his throat. “No… privacy seal?”

Tsunade snorts. “Oh, that’s already in place. I have locked the whole mansion. I’m definitely not going to live here and allow anyone to spy on me.” She glowers at Jiraiya. “Bad enough I have to deal with them all.”

Kakashi grimaces a bit, not needing to ask who ‘they’ are. He wonders if Tenzou is guarding the mansion tonight. And if Danzo is a bit frustrated he cannot listen in.

Jiraiya watches him for a moment, and then reaches for the sake, pouring them all some. Shizune starts to deal out meat and for a moment it is weirdly domestic, the four of them just looking at the small grill in the middle of the table. 

 

Tsunade sighs, breaking the silence, eventually. “So. What do you know already?”

Kakashi blinks, with a small laugh. “Know? Not much. I… was hinted at.” He shoots Jiraiya a look, who grins back, saucily, and sighs, with a shrug. “I could only extrapolate from my own experiences and what Sora-san and Jiraiya have told me. And Itachi.”

Tsunade looks at him, reaching for her glass. “And that would be?”

Kakashi sighs, looking away for a moment, trying to collect his thoughts. “I… believe I know that the Sandaime considered using me as an assassin for the jinchuriki at some point.” He keeps on talking, past the bitterness the words elicit, the pain, deep in his gut. “It is why he also wasn’t particularly helpful in rescuing a wood user years earlier. It is why he wanted me to teach chidori to Uchiha Sasuke.” He swallows. “I believe I know that he made several deals with some… uncanny forces within Konoha, and that he… let the Uchiha massacre happen. Let someone take their eyes.” Bile on his tongue now, as his body shivers with the meaning. “I believe… I know that the rampage of the nine-tails 13 years ago was no coincidence. I… believe I… know that my…” He swallows, blinking rapidly against the pain, his voice dropping to a whisper. “I believe I know that my Sensei and his wife were killed that night not only because the fox ran wild, but also…” He trails off.

 

Jiraiya continues, his voice soft and yet hard as steel. “Minato was killed that night because he did not dance to their tune.” 

Kakashi exhales a shuddering breath, remembering Minato using the special proverb, so long ago. Remembering quoting him, not so long ago. He draws a shaking hand down his face. “But… how?” He grimaces, shaking his head. “The fox killed him and Kushina after all?”

Jiraiya hums, and then cackles, sharing a look with Tsunade. “Did he? You saw the scorch marks, Kakashi, you know the jutsu he used. He sealed a part of the fox in himself and the jutsu, and only the other half in Naruto. That jutsu would have killed him even without the fox.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, the knowledge of the hell Minato condemned himself to flaring pain for a long moment. He sniffs, shaking his head to clear it. Shizune puts some meat onto his plate, but he only stares at it, unseeingly. “But… Kushina was the jinchuriki. She could have taken the fox after a bit of healing?”

Tsunade’s voice is laced with barb-wire. “I have looked at the medical records. Her birth was timed, they gave her a medication to hasten the contractions. Probably so you wouldn’t be there. And Sarutobi Biwako noted that they needed to cut because of that, since her body couldn’t follow the pressure fast enough.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away for a long moment. Hearing Tsunade as if through a fog. “It takes a lot to take an Uzumaki down. But severe blood loss will weaken anyone. Eventually.”

Kakashi shivers, and looks back at her, knowing his gaze is a bit wild. “You are saying she wouldn’t have survived anyways.”

Tsunade’s gaze is hard. “Death in childbirth is not as uncommon as we all would like, unfortunately. No-one would have batted an eye.”

Oh god. 

 

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, just trying to control his breathing for a long moment. I’m so sorry, Kushina. Sensei. He shakes his head, speaking past the constriction in his throat. “But… I mean, we know there was an attacker, even if we do not know who. We know it was an outsider…” He trails off, Orochimaru’s taunting voice ringing in his ears suddenly. ‘Don’t you know?’

Jiraiya watches him for a moment, and then lightly toasts him. “The village is shielded, an outsider would have been detected.”

Kakashi sniffs, his voice raw. “You really think it was someone from Konoha.”

Jiraiya sighs, sharing a look with Tsunade. “All the key players were carefully seen by the villagers. And the Uchiha clan carefully kept away.”

Kakashi blinks, hearing the undertone. His own voice carries his astonishment. “You think it was an Uchiha.” Who would have been recognized immediately by his clan…

Jiraiya nods, once. “We do.”

Kakashi shakes his head once. “But… who? I mean…” He trails off, his mind racing.

Jiraiya looks at him, for long moments. “I think that is the other reason why you had to be away that night.”

Kakashi stares at him, his mind blank. Refusing. He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “What?”

Jiraiya tilts his head, seemingly changing the subject. “I heard from Asuma that Itachi wanted to take you with him the other day.”

Kakashi blinks, grimacing. trying to follow. “Yeah, he… said in this dream he shared with me that he wanted to confirm something.”

Jiraiya leans over the table, eyes imploring now. “Think, Kakashi. What could he want to confirm with you?” He tilts his head. “What could be a risk of you specifically, that you had to be away from the village that night the nine-tails attacked?” His voice drops a bit, and his eyes glitter. “What is it about you that the Sandaime didn’t dare to call the Anbu the night of the massacre, even after he had sent you there to investigate before?”

Kakashi reaches for his sake, staring at the glass. His mind catches up now, unrelentingly. The pieces clicking into place feel like kunais, slashing his heart. His voice shakes.“You think that…” My sharingan. He drains the glass in one deep swallow, the alcohol burning through him. 

Tsunade’s voice comes, hard, and fatalistic. And kind, somehow. “It is not only your eye though. It is your connection.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, hand cramping around the empty glass. His voice is a whisper. “That is impossible.” He died.

Jiraiya hums. “Unlikely, yes.” He refills Kakashi’s glass and Kakashi lets his head fall back a bit, opens his eye unseeing to the ceiling. Jiraiya continues, softly. “But not impossible.”

 

Kakashi drains his glass again. Through the mask. The wet cloth is cold against his lips.

Jiraiya leans forward and takes the glass from him, pushes the plate closer. “Eat. We have a lot to discuss still.”

Kakashi’s voice is toneless. “You cannot think that…” You cannot really think that Obito is still alive?

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow. “I know Minato went back to that cave at some point. He wanted to retrieve the body.”

Kakashi stares at him, his mind empty. His tongue feels thick in his mouth, unresponsive. “I… see.” For a moment, his mind flashes back to Rin, to the moment of her death. To the moment after her death. He blinks, his voice brittle. “What does ‘Kamui’ mean?” He licks his lips. “I mean, in this context?”

Jiraiya frowns, but Tsunade raises her eyebrows. 

Her voice carries a note of wonder. “I have heard of it being used by some bearers of the sharingan. My grandfather told me there were members of the Uchiha in the war that could disappear with it.”

Kakashi blinks, feeling tired suddenly, so tired.

Tsunade leans forward, hear hazel eyes hard. “You need to train your eye, Kakashi.” She shoots a look at Jiraiya, who nods, before continuing, a note of authority in her voice. “You will go and do so when Jiraiya takes Naruto on the next trip.”

Kakashi nods mutely, staring down at his now full plate.

Shizune presses the sticks into his hand, gently.

 

Jiraiya sighs, and reaches for his own. His tone is dry. “Well. I guess it’s safe to say we unraveled that part of the puzzle.” He picks up a piece and starts chewing on it with a small sound of delight.

Kakashi cackles, harshly, for a moment. His tone is caustic. “There’s more?” More than realizing Obito is… was alive, and has been attacking Konoha? Has helped kill Minato and Kushina? Has helped kill the Uchiha? He shivers. No, I don’t believe it. I… cannot.

Tsunade toasts him. “Oh yes.”

Jiraiya hums, nodding at him. “For example, there’s the thing with that wood user. Which…” He shoots a look at Tsunade, who sighs. “Which is connected to why we left Konoha.”

Kakashi blinks, letting go of the previous train of thought with relief. “Which is why you don’t wear the Leaf’s hitai-ate.”

Jiraiya grins at him. “Clever boy.”

Tsunade sighs softly. “It is also why your father is dead.”

Kakashi stares at her, flabbergasted. “What.”

She sighs again, looking away for a moment before returning her gaze to his incredulous one. “Hatake Sakumo bore the weight of the village’s unwarranted scorn for quite a while. But what really broke him was when we were refused. That was when he lost hope. And the fight against his depression.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, dread settling in his stomach. “Refused.”

Jiraiya raises his chin. “We were ordered not to investigate the disappearance of all those babies.”

Kakashi’s voice is toneless. “All those…” 

Tsunade’s voice is a whisper. “Two dozen we know of. Maybe more.” She laughs once, a hard, painful laugh. “That is when I lost faith in my Sensei.” She shoots a look at Jiraiya. “That’s when Jiraiya did, too.” Her gaze returns to Kakashi. “That is when Sora did, too.”

Kakashi stares at her. “So you… just left.” He cannot help himself, he’s pissed, his words a hiss. “The most powerful ninjas of their generation just left, leaving the village to…”

Tsunade’s eyes grows hard, though her words stay soft. “There is nothing ‘just’ about our decision. We would not have been able to take the Hokage, parts of the council, and the Ne down.  Not to even speak of Danzo. You know that. Not then. Not when the clans were behind him. Behind them. It was a different time still. And… we lost the support of the village.” She cackles. “We were one step away from being literal pariahs. He bound our knowledge of it all into seals before he let us leave.”

Kakashi frowns, his gaze swiveling to Jiraiya. “But you came back and helped the Sandaime nonetheless.”

 

Jiraiya hums, shrugging once. “I came back after Minato’s death because I wanted to make sure that Naruto was more or less well taken care of. I struck a deal.” His eyes glitter very darkly for a moment. “He wouldn’t let me take the boy then, because as the jinchuriki Naruto ‘belongs’ to the village.”

Kakashi scoffs. “Naruto doesn’t belong to anyone.”

Jiraiya’s smile is wide, and full of fang. “Exactly.” The smile gentles to a grin. “Well, maybe except to you.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. He shakes his head, frowning. “But why didn’t the Sandaime just take Naruto in? I mean, he could have given him to his son maybe? They wanted to have kids after all, they had Konohamaru later.” He grimaces, his tone gentling. “I just never understood why Naruto was never adopted I guess.”

Jiraiya clicks his tongue. “Uchiha Mikoto wanted to adopt him. I know because I was there.” 

Kakashi stares at him. “But…”

Jiraiya tilts his head. “Of course an Uchiha wasn’t supposed to get their hands on the jinchuriki, and so she was refused. And he made sure no-one else would either.”

Kakashi shakes his head, remembering the rebuttal when he had wanted to drop out of the Anbu to take care of Naruto. Vividly. “But why didn’t he take him in then at least? Sora-san said something about Minato’s wishes?”

Jiraiya snorts. “Well, Minato’s wishes definitely wouldn’t have included the Sandaime taking in Naruto. And the Sandaime was… let’s say discouraged from taking in a child. Any child.”

Kakashi tilts his head, a shiver running down his spine. “Why.”

Jiraiya grimaces, but it is Tsunade who answers, her tone hard. “The Sandaime took Orochimaru in, after his parents died. He is the reason why Orochimaru became obsessed with learning every jutsu there is as well.” She hesitates, sharing a look with Jiraiya. “Orochimaru was very beautiful as a child. There were rumors. At some point Orochimaru was put up to live on his own, without any explanation. He never talked about it. But he withdrew from us. Became obsessed with ever darker jutsus. Forbidden jutsus. He wanted to raise his parents. He started to experiment on tissue, then small animals. Then…” She trails off.

 

Kakashi cannot breathe. 

His voice is raw. “You mean to tell me that the Sandaime put his hands on Orochimaru. And that the council hushed it all up.”

Jiraiya scoffs. “Yes. For a price.”

Kakashi’s gaze swivels back to him. “A price.”

Jiraiya smiles grimly. “Obedience. Yes.”

Kakashi blinks, remembering the weird conversations he witnessed. The deals that apparently were struck, that he hadn’t understood. Not then. “Oh my god.” He scoffs, his tone acerbic. “Sasuke is right. This village is rotten.” And I helped uphold the status quo, for so long. He feels sick.

Tsunade exhales, and then continues, obviously wanting to have it all out. “Orochimaru stayed for a while after we left. We think he was allowed to continue his experiments on the babies. They wanted that wood user after all.” She scoffs, grimacing and reaching for her sake. “Our Sensei always had this saying…” 

She pauses to take a sip, and Kakashi continues, tonelessly, another piece clicking into place. “‘To believe in one’s student and to watch over them is also part of being a teacher.’

She quirks an eyebrow. “Indeed. He kept supporting Orochimaru, despite everything. At some point though, Orochimaru apparently crossed one line too many. And the council made the Sandaime go after Orochimaru. Orochimaru took that as the ultimate betrayal.”

Kakashi exhales, remembering Sora’s words. “And then the Sandaime died by one he betrayed.”

Jiraiya hums. “Indeed.” He hesitates, and then locks his gaze with Kakashi’s, his tone tired. “If… we ever manage to capture him, please remember that he is a victim, too.”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, after a moment.

 

He looks down at his hand holding the sticks, and then back up at Jiraiya. “Why didn’t the Sandaime put the seal on Sora?”

Tsunade’s tone is vaguely gleeful. “He couldn’t. Sora trapped him in a genjutsu when he tried and then left, after she had spoken to Minato and Kushina.” Her tone sobers. “Unfortunately.”

Kakashi closes his eyes and then groans. “Which made them targets.”

Jiraiya nods, a painful grimace flitting over his face. “Yes.” He sighs through his nose. “I’ve said it before, I wished Minato had been a bit older, a bit more experienced in politics when he became Hokage… he was quite direct. With their knowledge. With the council. With the Uchiha.”

Kakashi frowns. “How did he manage to become Hokage, if it was the Sandaime they had control over?”

Jiraiya chuckles darkly. “Hiruzen… wasn’t a bad man, despite everything. Deep, deep down I mean. He often tried to do the right thing.” Kakashi frowns, remembering the vague apology in Sasuke’s hospital room. Jiraiya sighs, continuing. “He thought he could trick them by naming Minato his successor. Make their deals and control null and void.”

Tsunade picks up a piece of meat. “But they found a way.”

 

Kakashi stares at her, and then he puts the unused sticks down, and reaches for the bottle of sake instead. Refills his glass. He’s surprised his voice sounds calm. “What were Minato’s and Kushina’s wishes?”

Jiraiya sighs. “I think you know. They wanted Naruto to have his heritage and inheritance, of course. They wanted me to adopt and raise him. They wanted you to guard him, and stay with us.”

Kakashi’s voice is a whisper. Asking, though he already knows. “Why did Minato put the ink into the seal?”

Jiraiya smiles at him, gently, darkly, brutally. “Because he tried to force fate. Because he knew, then, that his wishes would be ignored.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long, long moment. I’m so sorry Sensei. I’m sorry for doubting you. I’m sorry for being angry at you. I’m sorry for being angry at this thing that connects me to Naruto. I’m… A sob tears itself from his throat, and he presses his fist against his chest for a moment, willing himself to breathe.

Tsunade’s voice tears through the fog in his mind. “I’m counting on you to help me to bring their asses down.”

Kakashi cackles, throwing his sake back, feeling it burn through him. “With pleasure.”

She looks at him, her eyes hard in the light of the moon. “It’s expected for me to retaliate for the assassination.” She grins, viciously. “In a way, the real culprits are right here, aren’t they.”

Kakashi smiles, grimly. He swallows and then shoots Jiraiya a look. “That is why you want Naruto out of the village, too, isn’t it. To get him out of their reach?”

Jiraiya smirks at him. “Yes.”

Shizune speaks up, for the first time since their discussion started, her voice clear and yet suffused with darkness. “You will need to move soon though. I don’t think they had expected the elders Homura and Koharu to ask Jiraiya-sama, and definitely not expected you to actually return, Tsunade-san. And they won’t want to let the jinchuriki just leave.”

Jiraiya chuckles. “Well, they can try to stop me.”

Kakashi smirks, feeling light-headed with hatred. “I hope they do.”

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow. “My inauguration is in four days. We will move then. Right when I get the hat, when it’s legal. I’m not going to wait for their move.” She raises her glass. “So, drink now. You’ll need to be sober and ready then.”

Jiraiya groans, loudly, and Kakashi cannot help himself, he cackles. 

Shizune leans in, her voice soft once more. “Do eat, Kakashi-san. You will need your strength.”

 

Kakashi looks at her.

And then at Tsunade and then Jiraiya, before pulling down his mask.

Jiraiya beams at him. Tsunade quirks an eyebrow, while Shizune blushes.

 

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, his tone dry, reaching for his chopsticks. “Indeed.”

 

 

 

I’ll make them fucking pay.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

The world seems fuzzy when he finally leaves the Hokage mansion, the night young once more, the sky lightening again already. 

 

Kakashi feels weird. Exhausted, elated, tired, awake, filled to the brim with hate and uncontainable love, the memories rushing through him in the wake of their discussion coming with a flood of emotions. 

 

He looks up at Naruto’s apartment, Konoha silent around him. It’s dark, but Kakashi… knows Naruto is there. Is asleep. 

 

Jiraiya’s voice is almost inaudible, obviously trying not to intrude too much. “So, are there any more dolls now?”

Kakashi smiles softly, grateful for his presence. “There are.” He shoots a look at the big Sannin, chuckling. “I still hate you for gifting him that abomination, but it has done him good.”

Jiraiya hums, a sly look crossing his features. “He had a miniature one with him on the trip.”

Kakashi blinks, feeling suspiciously warm. “He did?”

Jiraiya smiles at him, gently. “He loves you.”

Kakashi nods, once. “Yeah.” He chuckles. “He told me.” Several times now. He sobers, clearing his throat. “Not like that though.” Thankfully. Right?

Jiraiya hums. “Well, for him it is a gradual thing, too.”

Kakashi nods, and then clicks his tongue. “The first real infatuation will pull his legs out from under him, wether he loves me or not.” He swallows, willing his feelings down. “I don’t think that will be me.”

Jiraiya frowns at him. “You think?”

Kakashi shrugs, tone bordering on caustic. “Just a feeling.”

“Hmmm.” Jiraiya shrugs as well. “Well, the soul-mate bond is a weird one. And, as I told you, love comes in many forms.”

Kakashi blinks, sighing softly. He looks up at Jiraiya. “You love Tsunade.”

Jiraiya smirks, and shrugs again. “I do.” He smiles down at Kakashi. “I know she was bound to Dan, but that doesn’t change my feelings for her.” His tone grows a bit wistful. “I never found my supposed soul-mate. But given the circumstances I never regretted that.” He sighs. “I would be happy with her.”

Kakashi blinks. “She doesn’t return your feelings?”

Jiraiya chuckles, a bit sadly. “I don’t think she’s ever let herself consider.” He frowns. “But that’s okay. I know why. And I rather just love her from afar than not at all.” He smirks at Kakashi. “Maybe that is why my books are so helplessly romantic.” He chuckles. “Or so I’m told.”

Kakashi snorts, distinctly remembering the last chapter of Icha Icha Paradise, which had been romantic yes… and then ferociously explicit. “Uh huh.”

Jiraiya hums, slowly sobering. He sighs. “You should spend the next few days building memories with your team, Kakashi. For you and them. Go have fun. After Tsunade’s inauguration we will be busy. And then I’ll leave with him.”

Kakashi nods, slowly, and then he exhales. “I will.”

 

 

I will.

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

The scent of Tsunade’s perfume is more or less the base notes for “Si intense” - which I really like :)

It has also been brought to my attention that I seem to have mixed up "/" and "&“ for relationships… I honestly cannot remember where I had -my- info from but apparently & is friendship and / is romantic so I‘ve … adapted the tags. (Not that it changes that much for this fic, just as a note)

Chapter 19: Healing for the heart

Notes:

I had planned the thing with Sukea differently, but … somehow I liked it better like this, here, for them.

This is a (mostly) fluffy chapter. I think we (and they) deserve that after the last… and with what‘s still to come 😈

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

He got the lilac stripes on a whim, years ago. Stripes like Rin had worn them. 

They serve to hide his scar nicely, and the wig and contact lenses complete the change, a stranger staring back at him from the mirror.

Kakashi grins, seeing the stranger grin back. 

He had overheard his genins discussing how to best get a look under his mask earlier, again, and had switched with a kage bunshin, and had left another one to watch them and report. 

Pretending to ignore their efforts seeing him eat.

 

He smirks, making his voice higher than usual. “Time for some fun!”

The stranger’s eyes twinkle.

 

 

 

 

He engages them, easily, watching them stare up at him, oblivious. 

Sakura is whispering too loudly, Sasuke looks a bit bored but isn’t, and Naruto… Naruto is wildly mischievous. Asking for his name.

Kakashi looks at him, and then gives him the name he knows will tip him off. “My name’s Sukea. I’m a photographer.”

Naruto stares at him, open-mouthed, while Sakura asks about his profession. 

And then stares a bit more.

 

Sasuke shoots Naruto a weird look. “It’s rude to stare at people like that, teme.”

Naruto blinks at him, silently. Looks up at Kakashi. And then back at Sasuke.

 

And then… plays along.

 

Kakashi wants to snicker, loudly. He also wants to high-five Naruto, but refrains, bending a bit down to hash out a plan with the three to make his kage bunshin take off the mask. Knowing he created it with another mask beneath it.

He snickers, quietly, seeing the glee in Naruto’s eyes. 

The glee knowing he is in on the game for once. 

And having a field day with it.

 

Kakashi isn’t delusional enough to think that Naruto won’t hunt him down and flood him with questions later. But right now…

Watching his bunshin almost dance trapped in Shikamaru’s jutsu is especially hilarious. And getting the other genin to help his bunshin to thwart the plans to take the mask off. And thereby showing his face to them, which he knows his own genins will hear about at some point, and then… 

He snickers, seeing Naruto’s lips twitch.

 

The day passes, way too fast.

Breaking into the archives is delightful though.

 

 

He waves at his cute little genins in the afternoon, telling them he will be back, at some point. 

And telling them he will go home now, too. With a little wink, at a blond boy.

 

Naruto waves at him, his face beaming. “Thank you Sukea. Come back soon!”

Kakashi grins. “I will.” He smirks, feeling utterly light. “See you soon.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

He is just out of the shower and dressed, when Naruto knocks on the door. Hammers on it. 

Kakashi grins, and then pulls up his mask, opening the door with a flourish. “Naruto. So nice to see you.”

Naruto groans, as his face falls. “Damn. I wasn’t fast enough.”

Kakashi chuckles, stepping aside to let him in. “I must say, I had expected you sooner.”

Naruto rolls his eyes, kicking off his shoes. “Yeah, well, Sakura wanted to go though our plans one more time, to check what we’d done wrong. And of course I couldn’t just leave, I had to pretend to still want to see your face too after all.” He smirks, looking up at Kakashi. “Nice one, Sensei.”

Kakashi grins, giving him an eyes-smile. “Yeah, well, it’s our secret.”

Naruto beams at him, flopping onto the couch. “Thank you for not using another name, Sensei.”

Kakashi tilts his head, swallowing. “No, I…” He clicks his tongue, shrugging. “I felt you deserved to be in on it.” If not you then who.

Naruto smiles, widely, blushing just a bit. He looks away for a moment, and Kakashi sighs, knowing what’s coming. “It’s alright.”

 

Naruto’s gaze snaps back to his. “Really?”

Kakashi nods. 

Naruto blinks. “So… why do you wear a mask, Sensei?” He blushes a bit more, and Kakashi squirms just a bit under the direct gaze. “I mean, it’s not because you’re ugly?”

Kakashi chuckles, blushing a bit as well. He pinches the bridge of his nose. “Glad you think so.” 

Really glad.  

 

He scoffs silently at himself and hesitates. “No, it’s…” He frowns, gaze unseeing on the wall for a moment. “When I was very young still, I used to wear a scarf my mom made for me when I was very little still. Right before her death I guess. I was always ahead of everyone, and I didn’t like their stares. The scarf made me feel warm and safe. Hidden. And it smelled like her I think. When the weather was too warm to wear a scarf and the teachers took it from me I pulled up the collar from the turtleneck.” He chuckles. “It became a habit, and then it associated with comfort and then…” He swallows. “After…” He clears his throat, blinking away sudden tears. “After my father committed suicide it was the only warm feeling left.” 

For a very long time.

 

He hesitates, and then lets his gaze return to Naruto’s wide, painfully understanding one. “I had special turtlenecks made for me ever since.”

Naruto is silent, watching him, and Kakashi is suddenly aware and grateful, that Naruto does not offer the platitudes of comfort. We both know pain too well for that. He smirks softly. And then gives Naruto another eye-smile. “Besides. I like the moment I reveal myself.”

Naruto’s eyes flash. “It’s like a spell you can use. A special jutsu.”

Kakashi laughs, loudly. “Well, I don’t know about that.” He chuckles and then shakes his head. “But you’re not totally wrong. It does tend to stop people in their tracks.”

 

Naruto grins, his eyes sparkling. He hums, and then tilts his head. “Will you be Sukea again soon?”

Kakashi shrugs. “From time to time, maybe. I really enjoyed today. And… being someone else frees me to do things that would otherwise seem weird. Hear other things, too.” He smirks. “Subterfuge is a ninja art as well.”

Naruto grins. “So is hengeing.”

Kakashi scoffs. “Not the sexy jutsu though.”

Naruto giggles, though he blushes, too. “That is a powerful spell, too.”

Kakashi snorts. “I can imagine.” He blinks, remembering that Jiraiya has noted that Naruto had never tried it on Kakashi. He wonders if he should ask, but something holds his tongue, something tied to awareness. 

He swallows. We shouldn’t cross that bridge. Not for a long while yet. He exhales softly, realizing with a grim smile that Naruto seems to know that too, on some kind of level.

Naruto disrupts his thoughts, pulling at a chain around his neck. “By the way, Sensei, I won the necklace from baa-chan, right? Isn’t it pretty?”

He holds the blue pendant up for Kakashi to see, the crystal glinting in the light. 

Kakashi smirks. “Very.” He blinks, the words soft. “The stone has the color of your eyes.” Of Minato’s eyes. He sighs softly.

Naruto nods, but the tips of his ears are burning. He carefully puts the necklace under his fishnet shirt again. He blinks, a soft smile on his face. “I got a kiss from her, like I did from you.”

 

Kakashi freezes, the fact that Naruto addresses it all so freely stunning him. He swallows, trying to speak through the constriction in his throat. “Oh?”

Naruto nods, reaching up to touch his forehead, over his hitai-ate. “Right here. I didn’t wear the headband, and she kissed me.” He smirks, shifting a bit under Kakashi’s gaze. “It felt right.”

Kakashi blinks, stomping on the impulse how his had felt back then. Forcing himself to keep some kind of fucking dignity. And sanity. Settling on a vague: “That’s nice.”

Naruto blinks at him, obviously sensing something. He opens his mouth to comment, but closes it again, the air between them suddenly stifling. Fraught with… awareness.

Kakashi swallows. Forces himself to say: “I cannot tell.” You. I cannot tell you. Not yet. Seal or not.

Naruto looks away for a moment, and then smirks, softly. “I’ll wait.”

Kakashi swallows again, his voice unrecognizable to himself. “Okay.”

 

They are silent for a long moment, just looking at each other. The air is breathable again, though the awareness is still there. 

Finally Naruto smirks, and then hops off the couch. He grins. “Will we have fun again tomorrow?”

Kakashi shrugs. “Maybe? I haven’t planned anything though.”

Naruto’s eyes flash. “We’ll think of something.” He points a finger. “You still need to go fishing with me, Sensei.”

Kakashi hums. “Yeah, lets do that the day before the new Hokage’s inauguration, okay? In three days? I might be… busy after.” For a while.

Naruto nods, and then steps over and hugs him, holding fast for a long moment. His voice is soft. “Yes, Sensei.”

Kakashi inhales. 

Deeply.

 

And relaxes.

 

 

We will be fine.

 

He feels Naruto smile.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He finds Guy on the bench in front of the hospital the next day, where he sat with Asuma not so long ago.

 

Kakashi smirks wryly to himself and then wanders over, watching the sullen face of Guy light up the tiniest fraction. He keeps his voice soft, interpreting correctly. “No good news I take it.”

Guy shakes his head, slowly, his tone carrying nothing of its usual exuberance. “No. Tsunade-sama has told Lee that he will likely never fight again. He’s taking it badly.”

Kakashi hums, settling next to him. “He’s fought so hard.”

Guy nods, swallowing. “He has. I…” He hesitates, and then shoots a look at Kakashi. “I told him I’d quit with him.”

Kakashi stares at him, floored. “You…” He trails off, not knowing what to say. His voice drops to a whisper. “Are you sure?” 

Guy’s smile is trembling. “I’m sorry, my rival. If there is no miracle coming our way you might need to find someone else to spar with.”

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head. “I don’t care if I’d need another training partner, I worry for you!”

Guy’s big eyes tear up, his lip quivering. “Ahh, Kakashi, as always you manage to touch my soul with your words.” He sniffs, the tears streaming down his cheeks now. “I will be fine.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment. “Isn’t there another way?” 

Guy shakes his head, wildly. “The Godaime hopes to find a way to raise the odds for an operation. Right now there is a high chance he would die still.” He raises his fist, crying to the heavens. “Ahhh, how I wished I could take the pain of his youth onto me, to carry his burden. Let the fountain of my own youth be sufficient for us both.”

Kakashi blinks. “Right.” He clears his throat. “Guy…” 

Guy sniffs, turning his red-rimmed eyes to him.

Kakashi hesitates. And then sighs inwardly, resigning himself to be a good friend for once. He quirks an eyebrow. “Wanna race?”

Guy squeaks. “500 times around Konoha? Oh yes my rival, of course!” He jumps up, thumb raised, teeth glinting. “If nothing else the power of my youth and our dedication will be inspiration for the boy inside, who will watch us destroy the exhaustion that our muscles will pretend we feel.”

Kakashi stares at him, suddenly feeling mightily exhausted already.

Guy sniffs, holding out his hand. “Thank you, Kakashi. Come, let us start and be victorious.”

Kakashi looks at the hand for a moment, and then takes it, with a wry smirk.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

If his reputation would have allowed it, he would have crawled home.

 

As it is, he is walking back to his apartment, slowly. Very slowly. Grumbling to himself. 500 times around Konoha, such a madness. 

Everything hurts. His feet feel as if they’re just one single blister. His garments are soaked in sweat, and his hair is almost flat, sticking to his scalp. Which is a feat in itself, given its texture. Still. Guy had smiled at the end, there, when Kakashi had let him win. By half a foot. Kakashi shakes his head, vaguely annoyed at himself. One of these days he’s going to notice. Stop doing that, baka.

 

Not that it is easy to let Guy win.

Oh no. 

 

Not in the frigging slightest.

 

Kakashi always has to go full power to keep up, and he knows Guy would notice if he wouldn’t.

Which is the reason why he is so done, now.

 

But Guy had smiled. Grinned, broadly, fist raised, crying in delight. 

So… it’s been worth it.

 

His nose catches the smell of ramen, and his stomach rumbles, loudly.

 

He half expects to see something orange beneath the curtains, but there isn’t and he scolds himself for being disappointed. 

And then he frowns, remembering the previous day, the way Naruto’s face had lit up when he had said that they’d think of something.

He shoots a look up at the sun, noting it is afternoon already. We’ve been running for hours. He sighs, and shrugs, turning away from the delicious smell. I better go and try to find Naruto. Before he goes and… finds me. With a prank or something.

 

He puts some of his remaining chakra into a jump, and drags himself towards his apartment to shower first. 

 

 

 

Naruto is sitting in front of it - of course.

 

Kakashi cannot say why he isn’t surprised, just that he is relieved.

 

Naruto beams up at him, and then groans, loudly. Pointing a finger. “There you are Sensei, I thought you’d never come back.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Naruto. Been waiting long?”

Naruto shrugs, and then yawns, and Kakashi tilts his head. Naruto rolls his eyes. “A while.”

“Mhhh hmmm.” Kakashi nods at the door. “Come on in. But, fair warning, I need to clean up first, as you probably see.”

Naruto jumps up, beaming again. “That’s alright!”

Kakashi sighs, letting them in. “Why aren’t you with Sakura and Sasuke today?”

Naruto kicks off his shoes again, and Kakashi stares at them laying there in a heap in the corner, dimly realizing he doesn’t even really mind. “Sasuke has been even more of an ass lately. He’s just snapping at me for everything.” 

Kakashi sighs, following him into the living room. “His run in with Itachi brought up a lot of bad memories. And the fact that Itachi wanted you is not exactly helping.”

Naruto looks back at him, his expression earnest for a moment. “Yeah… he was really mean to Sasuke. That’s true.” He looks away for a moment, and then returns to the previous topic. “Sakura is doing some kind of vacation trip with her parents.”

“Ah.” Kakashi nods, and then looks at Naruto, flopped down on his couch once more. Thumping his heel against it. Kakashi’s stomach grumbles once more. 

Naruto’s eyes light up. “Want me to make you something to eat while you shower?”

Kakashi blinks at him. “Errr… no thank you.” That would be… He watches Naruto’s face fall a bit, and holds up his hands. “But maybe we can do it together, afterwards?”

“Okay!” Naruto beams up at him again. Kakashi sighs. Sucker. He points to the bathroom. “I’ll be quick.” He turns towards the bedroom to get new clothes, uncomfortably aware of the fact that Naruto’s eyes follow him. He closes the door behind himself, in order to prevent Naruto from sneaking up on him once more, that particular stunt nothing he needs right now. 

 

The shower he takes is perfunctory, and it does nothing to loosen the locked up muscles. 

But he is done real quick, as promised, and comes out of the bathroom still toweling his hair. “Naruto, I…” He trails off, his mouth dropping open as he sees Naruto sit on his couch - reading Icha Icha Paradise. He throws the towel over the armrest and snatches the book from his fingers, trying to make his voice stern. “Naruto. That is no book for a boy your age.”

Naruto blinks up at him. “Why? I mean, I’ve read them all before?”

All the sudden righteous ire he feels directed at Naruto deflates immediately, only to resurge directed at someone else right away. “What?”

Naruto shrugs. “Well, we did go through Ero Sennin’s manuscripts on the trip. You know, for the next one? It has to fit with what he wrote before after all.”

Kakashi stares at him. I’m gonna kill him. He’s actually quite proud his voice is firm. “He let you read that?”

Naruto stares at him, and then shrugs again. “I’m almost thirteen, Sensei. I knew most of that stuff?” He blushes a bit. “Probably not all the details, but…”

“Uh huh.” Kakashi stares down at the book in his hands, tries to remember those details. He clears his throat. “Still. These books are for adults. You’re simply not old enough.”

Naruto pulls a face. “Well, I’ve been old enough for almost anything else, so…” He pouts, looking away, and Kakashi stares at him, remembering that moment in that shady inn so long ago, when Jiraiya had told him that he was old enough, too, after that comment from the Sandaime. To drink. To die. To… 

He clears his throat again, frowning. He’s younger than me back then. But… the same rules apply, don’t they. More or less. Not… completely. Still. He sighs, massaging his temple for a moment. “Naruto. Just…” He trails off, shaking his head. And then sighs again. “So you read them all?”

Naruto nods, a bit sullen.

Kakashi blinks, trying to sound uninterested. “So what’s in the next?”

Naruto stares at him for a moment, and then grins, broadly. “Nope, I cannot tell, Sensei, sorry. Ero Sennin made me promise not to.”

Damn. Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Any idea when it’ll be out?”

Naruto’s grin broadens even more. “Soon?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. Naruto snickers. Kakashi lightly hits him over the head with the book and Naruto starts to laugh under his breath, rubbing his head. 

Naruto’s tone is teasing. “I think he’s still looking for a part of one of the chapters…” He sticks out his tongue between his teeth, for just a moment. “I could hint your wishes to him?”

Kakashi blushes, deeply, instantly, and he’s not even sure why. “Err… no. Thank you, but no.”

Naruto’s eyes twinkle at him. “Alright.”

 

Kakashi groans, and turns towards his little kitchen, putting the book away in the process. “How about some fried rice?”

Naruto hops off the couch, appearing behind him. Crowding him into the little space. Which is something that Kakashi viciously suppresses even considering feeling. “Can we take it and eat it somewhere else?”

Kakashi pauses, and then shrugs, with a sidelong glance. “Sure. Where do you want to go?”

Naruto shrugs, and looks away for a moment. “One of my favorite places.”

Kakashi blinks, and looks at him, and then reaches out, gently and carefully ruffling Naruto’s hair, feeling warm, so warm. “I’d be honored.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The wind up there on the Hokage heads serves to turn their food cold real fast, but that doesn’t matter. 

 

All that matters is the way that Naruto is pressing into his side, deliberately, while talking non-stop about all the pranks he pulled when he was smaller. Bragging how often they didn’t catch him. Telling Kakashi he looked forward being caught by him and the other Anbus when he jumped off. Telling Kakashi that he always felt safest on the head of the Yondaime, for some reason.

“The same spiky hair, you know?”

 

Telling Kakashi that he counted the days between his visits, and that he is so much happier now, now that they see each other regularly. 

 

Kakashi lets the words and the accompanying feelings wash over him, munching on his cold rice.

Enjoys the way they just sit there, when Naruto is all done.

 

Lets this little bubble that is just them reach deep, deep down into his very core. 

 

And then, without thinking too much about it, he presses his palm onto the ground, and summons his pack.

 

 

Pakkun, Shiba and Bull appear in a puff of smoke, to Naruto’s delighted squeak.

 

Pakkun licks his snout. “Boss? What’s the emergency?” Shiba yawns, and a bit of slobber drips from Bull’s snout.

 

Next to him, Naruto vibrates.

 

Kakashi shakes his head. “No emergency. I just wanted to introduce you properly.” He narrows his head. “Where are the others?”

Shiba walks closer, pressing into him for a moment. “With the puppies we visited before. They’re older now, of course, but they still like to play.”

He reaches up to pet Shiba’s head. “I see.” He clears his throat. “Alright. Shiba, Pakkun, Bull… this is Naruto. Uzumaki Naruto.” The name almost feels right, by now.

Naruto beams at them in greeting, his whole face lighting up like the sun. 

Pakkun levels him with a look. “We know.” His gaze travels over to Kakashi. “Boss.”

Kakashi glowers at him, just a bit. “I know you’ve met.” He clicks his tongue. “But I would… like you to recognize him as kin.”

Silence, as the words sink in. 

Naruto’s lip quivers, eyes huge. “Kin?”

Kakashi clears his throat. “Yeah, well, remember, you already realized we’re all you’re family now? Me…”, he hesitates, forcing himself to continue, “Sakura, and Sasuke?” He tilts his head. “That goes for my pack, too, of course.”

Bull blinks at him, knowing there is nothing ‘of course’ about this. 

Kakashi has never done this before. 

Not for Guy. Not for Asuma. Not for Tenzou. Not even for Iruka.

He grimaces a bit, trying not to feel a belated shame about that. 

 

Shiba presses into him again, silently lending strength. His voice is soft, filled with humor. And understanding. “Well, then, welcome to the pack, Uzumaki Naruto.”

Naruto stares at him, and then those big blue eyes fill with tears, and the face crumbles, and Pakkun sighs, loudly, and clambers onto Naruto’s lap - and is subsequently hugged to death, as Naruto starts to cry, with shaking, heaving sobs.

Kakashi blinks, and then leans over them both, pulling them into his own arms, and Shiba presses into his side, and then there’s Bull, over on the other, and Pakkun is squashed between them, but that doesn’t matter, does it.

Not when Naruto instinctively starts to pet his belly.

 

Kakashi grins into the wild hair just below his nose and tightens his arms.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Obviously, the young woman is very pretty.

Big, soulful eyes, and even a small beauty mark under her eye, that sets her off. The long brown hair is flowing, and her movements belie her clothing.

There’s muscles underneath that outfit, muscles that usually do not get trained by and in civilians.

 

He remembers her, and her wistful smile. 

 

He knows she’s a spy, even if his… cute little genins seem not to.

And so she gets caught. And interrogated.

 

Ibiki releases her into his care for the day. 

And she tells him the story he only told one person, once. Long ago.

Kakashi frowns, knowing that is why Ibiki called him. Yamanaka Inoichi must have seen the memory. 

 

He sighs, feeling his team follow them while they walk through Konoha, giggling in their various hiding places. Ah yes, puberty. Fun.

He knows any little thing, any advantage is used by enemy ninja.

He doesn’t take it personally, that she used their meeting as kids as the hook. 

Still.

 

He looks up at the sky, and she does the same, softly telling him of her memory. Of her dream.

Kakashi frowns, vaguely distracted by his genins whispering at each other in the tree behind them. I really have to teach them better subterfuge.

They’re loud. 

She smiles to herself, obviously reacting to them as well, and he grins behind his mask.

 

When Naruto falls from the tree her landing under him like that is no coincidence.

Of course.

He has to give it to her though, she acts mightily surprised.

And his cute little genins act like they just kissed her.

Naruto holds out a bouquet for her, grinning like a little fiend.

 

He blinks, wondering at the distinct lack of feeling for her.

Once upon a time… maybe. Because the memory itself has always been… soft.

His twelve year old self had really liked her.

 

But now?

 

He still feels something for her. Kindness.

He insists on being the one to do the prisoner exchange for one of his own, and he knows that if he would turn his steps upriver he would be able to meet with her. Talk to her. 

Maybe rekindle something.

Maybe remember something.

Maybe feel something… more.

 

He turns from the bridge instead, and back towards Konoha, his heart beating in his throat.

 

 

 

Naruto is sitting high up on the main gate, feet dangling down.

Kakashi stares up at him, silently, remembering the way Naruto had pushed the bouquet at her… holding it like a shield.

 

The way his eyes had twinkled, but had been watchful.

 

What have you seen there, today, hmm? What is it you think you saw?

 

What is it that you felt?

 

Kakashi blinks, and then jumps up, landing silently next to him. He keeps his voice soft, echoing the words of the previous day. “Been waiting long?”

Naruto shrugs, and then smirks. “A while?”

Kakashi hums, and settles down next to him.

Naruto blinks up at him. “Ero Sennin says that good things come to those who wait.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, tone dry. “Does he now.”

Naruto shrugs again. There is something in his tone. “Is she gone?”

Kakashi looks at him, for a long moment. “Yes.”

Naruto nods, averting his gaze. 

Kakashi wants to ask why. He wants to. But he refrains, forcing himself to look at the setting sun instead. He clears his throat. “So. Fishing tomorrow?”

Naruto’s face clears up, and he nods enthusiastically.

Kakashi grins, feeling the tiniest bit mean. “Alright. I’ll pick you up at 4:30am.”

Naruto squeaks. “What?”

Kakashi blinks at him, innocently. “Well, you know, chances are best if we go in the early morning? And we do want to cook and eat them later, don’t we?”

Naruto groans, his voice changing into a whine. “Yes, but Sensei, that early?”

Kakashi chuckles silently. “Yes, Naruto, that early. I have a meeting in the evening.” To plan.

Naruto heaves a sigh that sounds like centuries of suffering. “Alright…”

Kakashi chuckles again, loudly this time. He reaches up, and ruffles golden hair. “Well. See you then.”

And he’s off, to a very loud groan following him.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto is very cute when he’s still sleepy, and rubbing his eyes, and yawning, with his hair sticking up in all directions - in Kakashi’s of course rather biased opinion.

 

Kakashi smirks down at him, easily catching him when he almost falls, movements still rather uncoordinated. “Easy, Naruto.” He makes his voice a bit sterner. “You have to learn how to wake up sooner, and more coordinated… imagine if you have to get up this early on missions.”

Naruto grumbles, and then looks up with a withering look. “But we’re not on a mission, Sensei, we’re in Konoha.”

Kakashi holds up the fishing rod and can of worms in his other hand. “But we are on a mission?”

Naruto harrumphs, and stumbles again, and then yawns, loudly.

Kakashi chuckles. “You’ll scare the fish.”

Naruto grumbles something under his breath, and then falls into a trot next to him, wandering through the silent Konoha. Kakashi takes him through the Uchiha district on a whim, the barricaded and empty houses looking spooky in the graying light.

Naruto sniffs next to him. “We’ve been here before, haven’t we?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “You remember?”

Naruto shrugs. “Vaguely. As with my pranks and your visits some of my memories are a bit faded by now I guess… I mean, I was very little still. But I remember running into Sasuke here, with you.”

Kakashi hums, nodding. “Yes, he told me this was his street.”

Naruto snickers, a hand flying up to his own mouth. “He was pissed when I told him he’d be my friend.”

Kakashi weighs his head, walking past the building with Obito’s apartment with only a quick glance up. “More astounded I think. I don’t think he had many friends when he was younger… I think his brother filled that place for a long time.”

Naruto blinks, sobering instantly, his face watchful. “It must have hurt him deeply.” 

He doesn’t specify which incident, and Kakashi frowns, knowing there’s no need to either. “Yes.”

“Hmm.” Naruto sighs, and then shrugs. “I sometimes forget that, when he is being so… spurning.”

Kakashi grimaces at the choice of word, but nods, while opening the gate to the river. “I understand that. But we have to be the family for him he doesn’t have anymore.”

Naruto looks up to him for a moment, and then steps through the gate, waiting while Kakashi closes it behind them again. He inhales deeply, and then grins. “I will be.”

Kakashi smirks at him. “Good.”

 

He tilts his head upriver. “Think you can find the place we used to go fishing at?”

Naruto grins. “Of course!”

And he’s off.

 

Kakashi chuckles, following him at a more sedate pace, watching the first delicate tendrils of light touch the world. 

 

It’s promising to be a very nice day.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He leaves Naruto to scratch off the scales, which he does with the utmost concentration, tongue between teeth and all, and Kakashi chuckles softly to himself. One of these days I have to tell him to stop doing that. Before he’s too old to change the habit.

But it’s cute and Kakashi is rather unwilling to interfere now.

 

The markets are busy this time of day, and Kakashi picks his way through all the people carefully but almost sedately, knowing Naruto will be busy for a while. He buys vegetables, and some fruit, and then hesitates, remembering their discussion in the early morning.

 

He debates his idea mentally for a while, and then turns his feet to the tower, knocking onto the door of the intelligence division before he can change his mind.

 

Yamanaka Inoichi opens the door, with a flourish. “Kakashi. Come to yell at me for pushing that spy onto you?” 

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head. “No, I know that was Ibiki’s idea.”

Inoichi quirks an eyebrow. “Indeed. So what can I help you with?”

Kakashi clears his throat, and then holds up his bags a bit sheepishly. “I decided to invite my team for lunch. Can you tell me where they are?”

Inoichi stares at him, and then chuckles, loudly. “Sure.”

Kakashi follows the tall blond man inside, waits silently as he concentrates. “Well, the girl is at home. The Uchiha…” He hesitates, frowning, and then smirking. “The Uchiha is on training ground three.” He frowns again, and Kakashi opens his mouth to say that he won’t need Naruto’s location, but Inoichi chuckles again, reopening his eyes. “The jinchuriki is in his home.”

Kakashi grimaces at the designation, but nods in thanks, turning towards the door. “Thank you.”

 

Inoichi hums. “Such a delicate age he is in now. Treating him properly?”

Kakashi freezes in mid-motion, his gaze returning to Inoichi, slowly. His voice is icy. “Whatever do you mean.”

Inoichi clicks his tongue. “Well, you weren’t too interested in that spy kunoichi that obviously… offered. We were just wondering how far your relationship with him has evolved.”

Kakashi gnashes his teeth, trying to stay calm. It’s been a test by them. Dammit. “That is none of your business.”

Inoichi weighs his head. “The jinchuriki is our business, you know that.” He clears his throat, his tone gentling the tiniest bit. “Sorry.” He clears his throat again, his eyes a bit harder once more. “It is in all our interest that you bind the jinchuriki to yourself as tightly as possible.”

Kakashi tries and fails to unlock his jaw. “Is it.”

Inoichi nods, with a small sigh, tone vaguely apologetic. “I am not saying that I don’t value your restraint on a personal level, but in my official position as head of intelligence… It is my duty to tell you that it would serve if you could deepen your relationship on a more… personal and intimate basis.”

Kakashi blinks, his tone flat. Echoing. “Personal and intimate basis.”

Inoichi rolls his eyes, but his tone carries a grimace. “Do I really have to spell it out.”

Kakashi snarls behind his mask. “No.” He glowers at Inoichi, trying to stay calm. He turns away again, his tone caustic. “You do know how old he is, don’t you.”

Inoichi sighs, the words following him. “Old enough to fall in love at some point. If done right.”

 

Kakashi grimaces, feeling sick.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He pretends to be alright through their late lunch, glad when the dynamic between his genins takes off automatically, without too much of his input needed. 

Sasuke is sullen, but Kakashi can see even he likes the meal, and Sakura is fawning over him, and congratulating Naruto for his cooking skills for once, while shooting a look at Kakashi from time to time. At his mask, to be precise. Trying to catch him pulling it down to eat.

Naruto brags about his fishing skills, eating a huge portion of it all, while shooting weird looks at Kakashi from time to time, obviously sensing something is off. 

 

He stays with them until the sun starts to set, beating them again and again at cards, and then telling them sternly to be on time tomorrow, for the inauguration.

Naruto giggles, a hand flying up to his mouth. “Right, baa-chan will be Hokage officially.”

Sakura’s eyes glow. “Such a powerful kunoichi.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “She is.” He shoots her a look. “She is also extremely skilled. Maybe you should take a look at her skill set.”

She blinks up at him, and then looks away, frowning. 

Kakashi sighs, looking at Sasuke, who had loosened up a bit during their games, but who is staring at the cards now, unseeing. He keeps his voice soft. “The Godaime is not the Sandaime.”

Sasuke’s eyes fly up, and Kakashi holds his gaze until he averts his again, knowing they both remember the moment in the hospital right now. Here’s to hoping that that is actually true.

He clears his throat. “Alright, I need to go to my meeting. And I will be a bit busy after the inauguration. Why don’t you go by and visit Lee the morning after, hmm?”

Naruto nods enthusiastically, and Kakashi shoots him an eye-smile, before pushing up. “Alright. See you tomorrow.”

He holds up his hand, and waves, and then jumps out the window once more.

He still hears Sasuke’s somewhat annoyed comment. “Why does he always take the window? I mean there’s a door, and a balcony?”

Kakashi snorts, a bit bleakly, and jumps over the rooftops.

Now where would be the fun in that.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“Had fun?”

Kakashi lands next to Jiraiya on the rooftop on the other side of the village, the spot hidden from view and still fully illuminated by the setting sun, bathing them both in some warmth still. He shrugs. “Sure.” He settles down next to him, leaning back against the wall with a sigh. 

Jiraiya shoots him a look, echoing. “Sure?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, his tone acerbic, heavily emphasizing his words. “I had the brilliant idea to ask Inoichi to tell me where my team is earlier.” Stupid, dumb, idiotic idea. “And he told me none too subtly to deepen my relationship with the jinchuriki.” He hisses, snarling behind his mask. “To make sure he would fall in love soon. To get our relationship onto an intimate basis.”

Jiraiya sighs, and then hums. “It’s a good thing I’m going to take him onto a longer trip then.”

Kakashi swallows, his tone caustic. “Yes.” He sniffs, shooting Jiraiya a look. “You knew this would happen. You factored it into your decision for this trip.”

Jiraiya sighs, reaching up to clasp Kakashi’s shoulder for a moment, his gaze dark. “I… have a lot more experience in politics than you.”

Kakashi scoffs. “Politics.”

Jiraiya shakes his head, his expression tired. “The jinchurikis are seen as political assets, you know that. Given the… trick Minato pulled and what fate made of it… the powers that be try to factor it in, of course…”

Kakashi grimaces. “Of course?”

Jiraiya sighs again, deeply. “I do not like it either, Kakashi. But yes, I have expected it.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “If he were to stay here they would find a lever to pressure you.” He averts his gaze again. “Some way or another.”

That is also part of the reason why you left, isn’t it.  Kakashi grimaces, raising a shaking hand to cover his face for a moment. His voice is muffled behind it. “But you didn’t plan to take him away for the next 4 to 6 years?” Did you? Please tell me you didn’t.

Jiraiya shakes his head. “No… more like two. Or three.” He sighs again, grunting when he shifts his legs. “But he won’t be as malleable and delicate after that time. He’ll be 15 then, close to 16.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “I remember how Minato and Kushina were with 16… I couldn’t force them to do anything.”

Kakashi sniffs, picking at non-existent fluff on his pants. “Not like me.”

Jiraiya snorts. “Oh please, Kakashi. Your service in the Anbu that Minato put you in is not comparable to a jonin on joint missions with Sora’s team.”

Kakashi looks away for a long moment. He swallows. “Still.”

Jiraiya sighs, deeply. “You have to stop hating yourself.”

Kakashi grimaces, unable to answer.

 

Jiraiya sighs again, shaking his head. “I’m sorry.”

Kakashi looks away again, for another long moment. His voice is a whisper. “So am I.”

Jiraiya nods, and then clears his throat. “Alright, back to business.” 

Kakashi inhales deeply, and then returns his gaze to lock with Jiraiya’s, listening intently. 

Jiraiya smiles a small, dark, dangerous smile. “As soon as Tsunade has given the oath and received the hat we will move.” He quirks an eyebrow. “You and Tenzou will take a squad to take Danzo down.” He smiles grimly. “I will go after some of the hidden forces.”

Kakashi frowns. “You don’t think they’ll be at the ceremony?”

Jiraiya weighs his head. “I don’t know. Especially Danzo was not overly happy with Tsunade after all.”

Kakashi snorts. “You can say that again.” He shakes his head, lowering his voice even more. “You’re not going to tell me who you’re going after?”

Jiraiya inhales deeply. “No. Not now. I have my reasons.”

Kakashi frowns again, shooting him a look. “That powerful, huh.” 

Jiraiya shrugs. “Well, there are clans here that carry their kekkei genkais like a shield… and some that may think they’re untouchable.” He smirks viciously. “Some of them might need new leaders when this is over.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “I see.”

Jiraiya settles back a bit more, with a sigh. “After Danzo, we will have to disband his Ne.”

Kakashi weighs his head. “They were supposed to have been disbanded after the Uchiha massacre.”

Jiraiya nods. “I know.”

Kakashi sighs, deeply. “Sasuke is right. This village is rotten.”

Jiraiya smiles sharply. “All the more reason to pull out some of those rotten roots.”

“Mhhh.” It won’t be that easy. “What level of force is permitted?”

Jiraiya tilts his head to look at him. “With Danzo?”

Kakashi nods. 

Jiraiya shrugs. “Any. We don’t know what he did with the eyes he seems to have collected that night, but it’s safe to assume he didn’t want them because he thought they were pretty.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. His voice is almost inaudible when he speaks again. “That’s why you’re sending me after him… you think he uses them.” And I’m the only one able to withstand another sharingan.

Jiraiya sighs, deeply. “Yes.”

 

They are silent for a long moment, each stuck in their own thoughts. 

Eventually Kakashi sniffs. And changes the subject. “You let Naruto read your Icha Icha manuscripts?”

Jiraiya chuckles, and then shakes his head once, with a shrug. “So what, Kakashi. At least he found the books interesting enough to stay in the room when I needed to go out without him.”

Kakashi frowns, with a bit of a grimace. “You couldn’t take him with you?”

Jiraiya sighs. “I often had to dig for information in the more unsavory parts of town… you’d rather ask me to take him along into the brothels? I bet some of the ladies would love a boy his age for a change.”

Kakashi looks away, pulling a face. He tries to keep his instant fury at the prospect out of his voice. “No.”

Jiraiya looks at him - and sees right through him. “Exactly.” He turns away again, with another sigh. “The boy is very innocent in many ways, Kakashi. Naive even. But he is not dumb. Or prude. As is obvious by his sexy jutsu, and his use of it, which, as I may point out, did not originate from me or through my influence.”

Kakashi hums, conceding that point, unwillingly.

Jiraiya chuckles. “Besides. It’s probably better if he knows it all before he properly hits puberty, because he will be a looker. They will be after him, eventually.”

Kakashi works his jaw, looking away. 

Jiraiya grins at him. “Are you ready for that?”

Kakashi scoffs, but keeps his gaze firmly averted. And keeps his mind blank. With an effort.

Jiraiya giggles. “See, that’s what I thought.” He sobers slowly, bumping into Kakashi’s shoulder on purpose. “I will not take any innocence from him. But I will not stop him if he should decide to give a part of it to someone else either. Experience something new.”

Kakashi’s eyes snap to his, his breath short. “He’s thirteen.”

Jiraiya raises his eyebrows. “And he’ll be fifteen, probably, when we return. He will have met people. Maybe experience a first kiss with them. Or a flirt.” He shrugs. “We will see.”

Kakashi looks away, gnashing his teeth. “Just….” He trails off, not knowing what to actually say. 

Jiraiya seems to understand anyways. “I will.”

Kakashi nods.

 

They stay there, watching the last rays of sun fade, nightfall a blanket, fraught with intent.

 

Kakashi shivers.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The graves are silent, but the tranquility is missing today, his stomach churning.

The night had been short, and Kakashi had given up on sleep at some point. Had honed his weapons instead.

 

He had thought about taking his father’s tanto, the sword beautifully fitting for what is to come after all - but he had left it, deeming it too… obvious.

 

He knows Tenzou is already there, guarding the tower. Off to the side, with three squads. 

 

Kakashi tries to reach for Minato and Kushina, but there’s only the wind, in his ear.

Rin’s voice whispers in his memory, but it’s not directed at him, and he sighs, raising his eyes to the monument in the distance, finding Obito’s name easily by sheer habit.

 

He doesn’t feel close to him today.

 

Kakashi frowns. No, that’s not true. He tilts his head. I feel empty. But close…?

The wind picks up, and his heart starts beating rapidly, something deep within him latching onto the rising recognition. 

Kakashi tilts his head back further, off to the side, following his gut… and looks.

 

For an instance, his sharingan burns.

 

And then there’s pressure, and a word, whispering through his brain. Kamui.

 

And then it’s all gone, and he knows he’s alone now, and he gasps, loudly, with tears in his eyes.

 

Oh, Obito.

 

Is… can it be you?

 

You… idiot.

 

 

 

You’re just as much of a fool as I am.

 

 

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut for a long moment. Reaching with his soul.

 

 

Please. If it is you… 

Come back.

 

 

 

A tear falls, unheeded.

 

In the distance, a gong sounds.

 

Kakashi blinks, and banishes his emotions with a sob, and jumps.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He watches as the council elders stand proudly next to Tsunade, his gaze gliding over the assembled shinobi. 

Most of the clan leaders are there, in the front rows, with the noticeable exception of the Fuma clan, the Izuno clan, and the Onikuma clan. And… Huh. That’s interesting. Kakashi grins darkly behind his mask. The others are obviously hoping for more influence if they keep to Danzo. But… He and Jiraiya exchange a look, the big Sannin leaning nonchalantly against the wall off to the side. Watching boredly.

 

Kakashi tilts his head just slightly, feels Tenzou shift in response.

 

Tsunade receives the hat, her long fingers holding it elegantly for a moment. 

She keeps her gaze on the crowd as she puts it on to their loud cheers.

 

 

 

The veil falls, and Kakashi flies into action.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

I don’t think Kakashi really manages to “let” Guy win, by the way - but I think >Guy< lets him think that. :)) And vice versa^^. 

Chapter 20: Tails, strangling all hope

Notes:

Some more changes that will have effect… or not^^. Also: Jiraiya taking care of Kakashi. Explicitly. (And I MEAN explicitly. Ahem. I think we (and they) deserved that. Also we do want to use the rating on this fic, don’t we *g*  - I put “—“ around it though, in case you want to skip.)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

Kakashi stares at the empty house, the Anbu returning from checking the various rooms one after the other, taking up position behind Tenzou. Who is watching him, silently. Waiting for an order.

Kakashi grimaces, his hand twitching. 

I should have known he would know. Dammit.

He inclines his head, tries to keep his voice level, keep his anger out of it. “He fled. Please use half of your squads to close down the Ne headquarter.” He looks up and into Tenzou’s dark eyes. “For real this time.” He licks his lips. “Seal it. Hokage level release only.”

Tenzou smirks, viciously, and then nods, once.

 

Kakashi inhales, and then bends down, and summons his pack. “Kuchiyose no Jutsu.”

This time, they’re all there, and Kakashi smiles grimly. He doesn’t wait for them to address him. “I need you to track the man who lived in this house. Pick up his scent, find him. Do not engage. Send back word when you think I could…” He hesitates, clicking his tongue. Pakkun’s gaze is dark. “When I can reach him.”

Pakkun licks his snout. “Boss.”

There’s a split second of time, and then they all swarm out, sniffing around the various corners, running through the house.

Kakashi turns back to Tenzou. “They will find him.”

Tenzou nods. “Yes, Senpai.”

 

Kakashi sighs through his nose, watching the fireworks explode in the sky in the distance, the official inauguration party in full swing. “Alright. I’ll go help Jiraiya. Let’s go.”

 

He doesn’t wait for an answer, taking to the roofs with a jump he pushes all his anger into.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He finds Jiraiya towering over Hyuuga Hiashi, quietly holding the famed clan leader in a grip that looks… painful.

 

Kakashi grins darkly behind his mask, sharing a look with him, before stepping up to them. 

Jiraiya narrows his eyes, interpreting correctly. “Danzo fled?”

Kakashi blinks, wondering at the fact that Jiraiya is speaking without care who’s listening. “Yes.”

Jiraiya grumbles, under his breath, and then chuckles, a bit meanly. “Hear that, Hiashi? The man who wanted to make this village so great and powerful again ran like a dog with his tail between its legs.”

The Hyuuga clan leader grimaces, his large lilac eyes unseeing on the floor. His words are a hiss. “A healer is not someone we need as leader. She is not strong enough to lead shinobis.”

Jiraiya cackles, harshly. “Ahhhh, you idiot.” He twists his hand, and Hyuuga Hiashi grunts in pain. “My strength is but a fraction of hers. Physically and mentally. Besides…” He pulls Hiashi up, harshly, making him wince. “True strength comes from conviction, not viciousness. But I guess you still need to learn that.”

 

Kakashi sighs through his nose, looking past the two into the courtyard, where Hyuuga Hanabi stares at them with huge eyes. Off to the side, Hyuuga Hinata comes running. “Hanabi!”

Kakashi steps past them, interjects quietly. Gently. “Hinata-kun. Please calm down.” Down the street, he can see Kurenai hurry up to them. He sighs, leaning down to Hinata, when she stops in front of him. Her eyes swivel back and forth between him and her sister. Off to the side, Hyuuga Neji is watching almost dispassionately. 

Hinata sniffs, lip quivering.

Kakashi reaches out, clasps her shoulder. “Hinata-kun, please calm down. You will need to be strong for your sister now.” He shoots Jiraiya a look, who tilts his head to the tower. He sighs again. “You are the oldest heir of the Hyuuga I take it?” He grimaces behind his mask. “Of the main branch, I mean?” 

Hinata nods, eyes swiveling to Neji for a moment, before returning to Kakashi. Her voice is very small. “Yes?”

 

Kakashi nods, and then sighs again. “You are the clan leader now.”

Hinata’s eyes are huge, unblinking. “What?”

Off to the side, Neji scoffs. Hanabi sniffs. Hiashi cusses at him, viciously. And is then muffled by Jiraiya’s big hand, who shakes his head at him.

Kurenai skids to a halt next to them, kneeling down immediately, her hand pressing into Hinata’s back, lending strength. Her eyes find Kakashi’s. “What is happening Kakashi.” She looks over to Jiraiya for a moment, before returning to him. “What is the meaning of this?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Jiraiya is taking Hyuuga Hiashi to the tower now.” He looks over to the big Sannin, who nods, and then vanishes with Hiashi. Kakashi exhales slowly. “Hinata-san is now the clan leader of the Hyuuga.”

Kurenai stares at him, her tone flat. “You cannot be serious.”

Kakashi shrugs, just a bit, and then his eyes return to Hinata. “You will need to take care of your sister for now. Do you have relatives who can come and live with you?” By sheer age she’s old enough to live on her own. He grimaces. But I know how that feels. There’s no need to do that to her if she has relatives left.

Hinata blinks, and then nods, after a moment. There are tears in her eyes. “Of my mother’s side, yes.” She shoots a look at Neji. “And I am well protected, especially, after someone already tried to abduct me during Orochimaru’s attack.”

Kakashi nods, relieved, sharing a quick look with Neji. “Please give Sensei Kurenai the names and then we can send word.”

Hinata blinks, and pulls Hinabi into an embrace when she steps up to her. “Sensei Kakashi… what happened here?”

Kakashi grimaces. “Your…” He hesitates, looking for the right words. “Your father made a bad decision.” Another one. Based in the same prejudice. He smiles grimly, and then swallows. “It will be fine.”

Kurenai quirks an eyebrow. 

Yes, yes, I know the laws of this village. Kakashi sighs, and looks up at her. He clicks his tongue. “Things are in motion.”

Kurenai scoffs. “No shit.” She shakes her head once. “She didn’t waste any time.”

Kakashi rises his eyebrows, his words soft, but firm, willing her to understand. “We didn’t want to waste any time.” There are things we didn’t want to risk.

Kurenai blinks, and then looks to the tower for a moment, where Jiraiya vanished to. “I… see.”

Hinata interjects, her small voice quivering. “Sensei Kurenai, will my father be alright?” Her eyes fill with tears. “Please, Sensei, you must make sure he will be alright?”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment. He clears his throat, the lie a heavy one. “I’m sure it will be alright.”

Kurenai glowers at him. 

He shoots her a look, grimacing, and she pulls a face, and then sighs, addressing Hinata once more. “Hinata, do not worry. I will be staying for you until your relatives arrive.” She smiles, a bit meanly. “Kakashi will do everything in his power to make sure your father will come back, safe and sound.” She smiles at him, dangerously. “Right?”

Kakashi grumbles something under his breath but nods, silently congratulating Kurenai for taking that stance. Yes, go and show Hinata how it’s done. He sighs. “I’ll do my best.”

Kurenai clicks her tongue, her eyes boring into his. “Maybe, a stripping of rank will suffice? Who knows?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, exhaling in a rush. “Maybe.” He bites his lips for a moment, refusing to look down into the huge lilac eyes staring up at him. He clears his throat. “I have to go.”

Kurenai presses her lips together for a moment. Tone icy. “Do come by tomorrow, Kakashi. And let us know.”

It is not a question.

 

Kakashi nods once, and turns away.

 

And smiles, quickly, just for a moment.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Kurenai is pissed at you.”

Kakashi snorts, settling on the bench next to Asuma in front of the tower. He sighs, letting his head fall back a bit. “I can imagine.” He grunts, with a small chuckle. “Congratulations by the way. She’s a lioness.”

Asuma chuckles, drily. “Yeah. I wished my father had gotten to know her properly.”

Kakashi hums. “Mhhh.”

Asuma shoots him a look, while lighting a cigarette. “You don’t think she’d have managed to impress him, eventually?”

Kakashi shakes his head once. “No, that’s not what I mean.” He smirks grimly. “I know she would have.”

“But?” Asuma leans back next to him, blowing the smoke up into the night sky.

Kakashi shakes his head. “I just…” He grimaces, and then lowers his voice, shooting Asuma a look. “Many people mistake kindness for weakness. Generosity for the ability for exploitation. Healing for the inability to wage war…” He trails off, reminding himself that Asuma himself didn’t quite realize the power Jiraiya wielded, simply because he had covered it in frivolity. He frowns. “It was just something Hyuuga Hiashi said today. And what led him to reject Hinata, too.” He clears his throat. “Kurenai tore a promise to protect a traitor from me, almost effortlessly, because she loves Hinata. Love is a force to be reckoned with.”

Asuma puffs on his cigarette, a smile on his face. “Ah.” He chuckles, shooting Kakashi a look. “Yes, it is.”

They are silent for a moment, but eventually Asuma breaks it once more. “So, did you?”

“Hmm?” Kakashi watches the stars twinkle, his mind almost blank, nose filled with Asuma’s smell. That I really like.

Asuma chuckles, elbowing him gently. “Save the traitor.”

“Oh.” Kakashi sighs, heavily. “I convinced Jiraiya and Tsunade that it could indeed be in our best interest if we didn’t alienate the next generation even further.” He snorts, and then chuckles. “Of course it helped that Naruto showed up and yelled at them.”

Asuma turns his head, watches him for a moment. “He didn’t.”

Kakashi grins, letting his head fall back, eyes slitted and unseeing. “He so did.”

Asuma snorts, a bit bewildered. “Why?”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows. “He and Hinata are friends.”

Asuma clicks his tongue. “Oh?”

 

Kakashi smiles gently, behind his mask. “His words, screamed at them.” He hesitates, and then adds, his words very soft. “Apparently they really met up time and again as little kids. And apparently Hinata was always nice. But shy. And apparently, and even though - his words, again, not mine - he ‘doesn’t quite understand why she’s always stammering and blushing around him’”, they share a small chuckle, and Kakashi shakes his head, continuing, “she’s ‘one of the best things of the village and if we hurt her he will make us pay’.” 

He nods quietly and then shoots Asuma a look. 

And shrugs.

Asuma stares at him. “No shit.”

Kakashi chuckles softly, a part of him that had been safely locked bleeding out. “Nope.” He smiles softly. Proudly. “He pushed his fist at us, you know, like he did in the chunin exams with her blood on it?” He shoots a look at Asuma, who nods. “And Jiraiya and Tsunade stared at him for so long I was really uncomfortable?” He shrugs, with a small laugh. “And then something in Tsunade softened and she nodded, once. Telling him she’d see what she could do.” He sighs, deeply. “The little rascal.” Something in him is hurting, real good. 

Asuma blinks, and then laughs gently, flipping the ash off his cigarette. “Nice.” He sniffs. “Looks like we both got lions.”

Kakashi snorts, tone amused but sardonic. “Or a cub.”

Asuma snorts. “Well, he does have the right color.”

Kakashi giggles. He sniffs, and then shakes his head, sobering slowly and sharing a glance with Asuma. “You’re an idiot.” And so am I.

Asuma leans in, his voice a rumble, humor and affection laced into it. “And you love it.”

Kakashi snorts, and closes his eyes, his voice faraway. “I do.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Tsunade frowns, her finger tapping on the desk, twice. “Alright, so what do we have.”

Shizune sighs, and shuffles the papers. “We have written proof that the heads of the Fuma and Onikuma clan have conspired to have you removed from office. There are also indications that the Izuno clan has helped them, hoping for recognition and an elevated standing with the other clans.”

Kakashi shifts to his other foot, listening intently. 

Shizune continues, with a frown. “We have a confession by Hyuuga Hiashi that he would prefer another Hokage and has met up with people who share this conviction.” She leafs through the papers. “We couldn’t make him give us names though.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, knowing Ibiki is likely in a really bad mood right now. He is not above feeling glee about it. Good.

Tsunade hums, shooting a look at Jiraiya, who is lounging on the sofa at the back, but addressing Kakashi. “What about Danzo?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “I lost trace of him two miles outside the village.”

Tsunade frowns. “Your nin-ken lost the trail?”

Kakashi gnashes his teeth. “No.” He raises his eyes to hers. “The trail went cold. In the middle of a clearing. There were other scents.”

She quirks an eyebrow, and he knows she understands.

Jiraiya groans, deeply. 

Kakashi sighs, quietly. “I’ve sent them out to hunt for those scents as well. They will report to you when they have found something.”

 

I’ll find you.

 

Wherever you are.

 

He tries not to feel anything.

 

Tenzou speaks up, silent up until now. “Though there is a lot of gossiping around Konoha, all the big discussion are happening more or less publicly in tea-houses and restaurants and the like. They do stop when they see us, but that is normal.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, remembering the looks well. 

Tsunade nods. “I see.” She sighs. And then grunts, an almost laugh. “I sent Hyuuga Hiashi to his weekend house. But I have stripped him of his status.” She looks over and at Kakashi, locks their gazes. “I… want him to learn.” 

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, hearing the meaning. You want them both to learn. Or… all of them.

He sighs, and nod, once.

Tsunade looks back at Shizune. “What else?”

Jiraiya sighs, with a sidelong gaze at her. “How long do you want me to stay?”

Kakashi freezes, knowing what it means.

Tsunade sighs. “I’d appreciate it if you could stay for… two more weeks.”

Jiraiya sighs, and lies down on his back on the couch. “Alright.”

Tsunade glowers at him, and then sends that heated gaze towards Kakashi. “Is that alright with you, too?”

Kakashi frowns, wondering at the precise number. He swallows, his voice raw. “Sure.”

Tsunade nods, curtly. “Sunagakure has reported that the Mizukage has been murdered just before the attack on Konoha. So Orochimaru used them, too. They’re not… happy. I’ll try to build on that.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. I can imagine. And… good thinking.

Tsunade sighs again. And snorts. “The council is afraid that the jinchuriki is becoming too willful to be a proper deterrent against other villages.” She shoots Kakashi a look, and his eyes bore into hers. “His latest run-in with the Wind‘s jinchuriki has convinced them, that he does not follow the beaten path.” She smiles, sharply. “I almost rolled my eyes at them.”

Kakashi grimaces, in away that could almost be a smile. “I really wonder if Senju Mitu or Uzumaki Kushina really were that… mendable as they like to imply.”

Tsunade snorts, raising her eyebrows. “You wish.”

On the couch, Jiraiya is smiling serenely. Meanly.

 

Kakashi echoes it.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He can see the light flares, all the way from the tower.

 

The jump seems too long, never-ending.

 

 

The moment his eye realizes what he sees burns itself into his brain.

 

The expressions on their faces is frantic, and driven, respectively. 

Chidori and rasengan fuse to a cacophony of light and sound.

Aimed at each other.

 

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

 

DAMMIT.

 

He catches their wrists, just before the collision.

Uses their momentum to throw them both at the water tanks.

 

He tries to contain the terror in his heart.

Tries to seem relaxed.

Indifferent. 

 

They cannot see that he needs to sit down because his legs are weak. 

 

That was close. Too close.

He clears his throat, watching Naruto watch Sasuke with big eyes. “Sasuke… that chidori was a bit much to aim at a friend.”

Sasuke harrumphs, and then jumps over the fence, leaving them.

Behind Naruto, Sakura is shaking.

 

Kakashi tilts his head back, keeps his voice low, the words meant only for the man behind the other water tank. The man who had been just as fast as him, but had watched him handle it. “I think the rasengan is still a bit much for him to handle.” He clicks his tongue, watches the blue eyes turn stubborn. “He could have killed Sasuke.”

Jiraiya harrumphs. “Well, Sasuke’s chidori was too powerful to throw at a friend as well.” 

Kakashi swallows, his voice almost inaudible now. “The rivalry between them is getting out of hand. And times they seem so tightly knit and at others…” He trails off, watching the light in Naruto’s eyes dim as he turns away, obviously realizing that Sasuke is not coming back. His gaze swivels to Sakura, whose eyes are still wide and frantic, watching Naruto.

Jiraiya hums. “It will be good to separate them for a while.”

Kakashi sighs, deeply, keeps his own emotions regarding the matter in check. “Will it?”

Jiraiya frowns. “You don’t think so?”

Kakashi shrugs. “I… think Naruto is the only good thing in Sasuke’s life left… that’s why he’s fighting him, tooth and nail.” He smirks, a little self-deprecating little smile. Yeah, sounds familiar, indeed. 

Jiraiya sighs, deeply, and then chuckles - speaking the thought out loud. Gleefully. “Sounds familiar, doesn’t it.”

Kakashi tilts his head, and shoots him a skunk-eye, before hopping off the water tank.

 

Naruto blinks up at him, his face sullen. Tone… depressed. “Sensei.” He looks away and then back up, a pout appearing. And an iota of belligerence. “Are you going to yell at me now?”

Kakashi narrows his eyes - and then raps him over the head. 

Naruto hisses, rubbing the smarting spot, glowering at him.

Kakashi tries to keep his voice stern. “Naruto. The rasengan is never aimed at friends.”

Naruto’s jaw sets. “But he aimed the chidori at me?”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. “I know.” He shakes his head. “I know.” He clears his throat. “Which is why I’m going to have a chat with him in a moment, too.” He raises his eyebrows and points his finger. “But you…” Naruto’s stomach growls, and Kakashi blinks, and then smiles a bit meanly. “You are going to take Sakura for ramen. As recompense for scaring her so much.”

Naruto’s mouth drops open, his voice indignant. “What???! But I didn’t do this alone? Why do I have to pay for her meal?”

Because I don’t want you to be alone right now. And I have to go after Sasuke. And if you are pissed at me you won’t sink even deeper into the disappointment you feel right now at least. Kakashi clears his throat, makes his voice stern. “Because I say so.”

Naruto clicks his tongue, crossing his arms. He looks away, face pinched.

Kakashi turns to Sakura. “I hope you’re hungry.”

Sakura blinks at him, her hands still clenched, held up like a shield in front of her. 

Kakashi sighs, and reaches out to clasp her shoulder. He gives her an eye-smile. “It will be alright. I promise.”

She nods, jerkily, some of her pinched expression fading, and he sighs soundlessly. 

And then he pushes himself up to full height, leveling them both with a stare. “Now go, I will need to see the administrator and organize two new water tanks thanks to you.”

Sakura blushes and Naruto grumbles, but they leave together, seemingly small and fragile.

Kakashi turns to look at the two destroyed water tanks. 

 

Small and fragile, indeed.

He sighs, and then jumps down to Jiraiya. 

Who is watching him, eyes twinkling. His voice carries humor. “Fitting punishment.”

Kakashi shakes his head, once. “This thing between them is eating at him. You don’t happen to be hungry, too?” To lighten his mood?

Jiraiya chuckles, and then stretches, one hand rubbing his belly. “Well, I guess I could eat.” He tilts his head. “Go and try to get some sense into the Uchiha boy. I saw his face when he saw the damage from the rasengan.”

Kakashi groans. “But that’s not comparable?”

Jiraiya’s eyes glitter, and he snickers. “But it’s a common misconception, to compare only the sizes…”

Kakashi groans again, with a skunk eye. “You really are Ero Sennin.”

Jiraiya tilts his head, with a smirk. “Why thank you.”

Kakashi turns away, cursing him under his breath. 

With a smile.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He finds Sasuke sitting on the branch of a tree, staring out over Konoha. He puts the wire away, glad he doesn’t have to use it after all.

He settles on the next branch, quietly dangling his feet for a moment.

Sasuke looks away, his expression dark.

 

Kakashi sighs. “Chidori is not something you aim at a friend.” 

Sasuke grimaces. “He came at me with the rasengan?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. His tone is dry. “You two are like pot and kettle, seriously.” 

Sasuke harrumphs. 

Kakashi sighs again. “Why are you so pissed at him.” He hesitates. “Is it still because of Itachi?”

Sasuke grimaces, his dark eyes returning to Kakashi for an instant. “And if it is?” He snarls. “I saw the damage Naruto has done. I’ve seen him defeat that monster, that I could not.” His voice rises. “Even with the curse mark!” He spreads his arms, dark hair flying. “He is becoming so much stronger, and I…” He deflates, trailing off, his gaze darkening further.

Kakashi nods. “You think I’m keeping you back.”

Sasuke’s eyes fly to his, for a moment. He looks away again, quickly, not answering.

Kakashi grimaces. “Sealing the curse mark only served to let you come into your own powers, Sasuke. This… thing is power by someone else, someone who wants payment for its usage.”

Sasuke hisses. “So what. It’s power.”

Kakashi sighs, deeply. “And what is it that you need that power for, now?” He lowers his voice.  “Did we not talk about how Itachi does not deserve your hate?”

Sasuke turns to him, his teeth bared. “If you told me or not, HE told me it was the only thing to become stronger.” There’s a weird light in Sasuke’s eyes now, one that makes Kakashi uncomfortable. “If I cannot get stronger by training, I will use hate.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, shakes his head. Oh, you fool. He clicks his tongue. “Sasuke, energy channeled into hate for revenge will only destroy you. It cannot give you what you seek. It will only hurt you more.”

Sasuke scoffs. “Oh, and what do I seek, Sensei?”

Kakashi’s voice is soft. “Family.”

Sasuke snorts, but averts his gaze, hastily. “You only think you know me.”

Kakashi sighs, looking up at the sky for a moment. “Maybe. But I know that right now you are pushing up all the dark thoughts you possess, trying to justify leaving. Trying to justify hurting those that love you.”

Sasuke is silent for a long moment. When he speaks again, the tone carries viciousness, but Kakashi can hear the desperation under it. “I could kill you. Or kill those you love. I could kill him.”

Kakashi nods, somehow not taking offense at the words, knowing they stem from desperation. And then he clears his throat, realizing Sasuke knows how attached he is to Naruto. I guess I’m becoming obvious. The thought is bittersweet, underlaid with a very special kind of terror. 

He shrugs, with an effort, and a sigh. “And then?”

Sasuke’s head swivels’s round. His eyes are huge, locked to Kakashi’s. “I…” He trails off.

Kakashi smiles softly. “Exactly.”

Sasuke sniffs. He angrily wipes at his eyes. “I…”

Kakashi gets up silently, looking down at him. “Think about it all, Sasuke. And know that if you do run, we will come and drag your sorry little ass back by the scruff of your neck.” He hesitates, adding on a whim. “And cuddle you until you cannot breathe anymore.”

Sasuke snorts, trying to hide his involuntary smile behind a pinched and angry facade.

Kakashi smirks to himself. 

 

There is a displacement two trees over, and Kakashi discreetly nods at the Anbu, waits until she’s gone again. He clicks his tongue. “I have to go.” He tilts his head. “Don’t hurt yourself further, Sasuke.”

Sasuke sniffs, shooting him a look, and then looks away again, fingers playing with the cloth of his pants.

 

Kakashi smirks gently, and then jumps, following the Anbu to the tower.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Pakkun is having a staring contest with Tonton right there on the desk.

Kakashi raises his eyebrows at him, and then shares a somewhat bemused look with Tsunade.

Tsunade’s gaze sobers though, immediately. She nods at Pakkun. “Please tell Kakashi what you told me just now.”

Pakkun licks his snout, averting his gaze to look at Kakashi. “We have picked up Danzo’s scent again. At an inn close to the borders of Amegakure.”

Kakashi frowns. “Amegakure? They haven’t been playing in the big leagues ever since Hanzo won?”

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow. “Indeed. I want you to go and check it out.” 

Kakashi frowns, grimacing at the thought of having to go, now. Now when so many things are in motion. “How far is it?”

Tsunade sighs through her nose, interpreting his tone correctly. “One and a half days at top speed. You can be back in three. I don’t want you to follow them into Amegakure right now if the lead turns out to be correct, I just want the confirmation.” She clicks her tongue. “Though a covert mission to Amegakure might be in the cards later.”

Kakashi nods. “I see.”

Tsunade nods. “Go and prepare. Leave immediately. Jiraiya is still here. It will be alright.”

Kakashi sighs. “Yes, Godaime.”

Pakkun yawns, his eyes returning to Tonton. “Shiba is waiting at the gate.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, shoots him a look, before raising his eyebrows at Tsunade. 

Tsunade shrugs, with a roll of her eyes.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He cannot help himself, he is anxious.

The trees fly by, and Kakashi pushes some extra chakra into speed, grimly following Shiba. 

 

He reaches the inn after exactly 30 hours, a drizzling rain setting in. He grimaces. Typical for Amegakure. He looks at the horizon, where the tips of the towers of the heavily industrialized village seem like hovering shadows. 

He signals Shiba to wait and steps up to the entrance. The door creaks as he pushes it open. He surveys the room, the few patrons, who are ignoring him. He draws his traveling cloak tighter, and steps up to the counter, debating turning to subterfuge, but dismisses it, knowing Danzo knows that he’s followed. No use beating around the bush.

The woman’s face is tired, framed by unruly hair. “Yes?”

Kakashi bows his head. “I am looking for a colleague. He is recognizably clothed in white. With wraps around his head.”

The woman blinks at him, wiping the counter. “And, so what?”

Kakashi grimaces. “Has he been here?”

The woman is silent for a moment. “How valuable is that information to you?”

Kakashi smirks grimly, and pulls out his purse. He puts some bills on the counter. “So, has he?”

The bills disappear, and the woman smirks. “He came by around the same time Hanzo the Salamander defeated that rogue fraction.”

Kakashi blinks. “No, I meant rece…” He frowns. “He has been before?”

She holds out her hand, and he pulls out some bills again, grimly. She smirks, her eyes glittering as she counts them. “He has been twice, yes. Back then he stayed a few days. And the other day, he stayed only for a night.” She chuckles. “He still liked the roast I do.” She looks up at him. “Do you want to try it, too?”

Kakashi shakes his head, his mind churning. Danzo has been by before? Shortly when Hanzo defeated that group?  So a few years back? He raises his eyes to the woman’s. “Can I see his room?”

She quirks an eyebrow, and he sighs, pulling out his purse.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

She holds the door open for him, nodding once. “Just pull it close when you leave.”

He nods, stepping carefully into the room. He doesn’t expect for it to be boobytrapped, given the fact that the owners had to come in and clean at some point, but there is something nagging at him, something tickling the back of his brain.

Something Danzo said.

 

The room is small. 

There is a futon bed in a niche, and a small closet, off to the side. A basin. A towel. The rug is rolled up in a corner. There is a low tea table, in the middle of the room.

Kakashi stares at it, and then back at the rug. 

He kneels down, and unrolls it, knowing he’ll find something.

Dreading what he’ll find.

 

Something wrapped in white cloth tumbles out.

Kakashi exhales, and then reaches for it, unwrapping the soft and elongated flexible… thing.

The message.

And stares at it, for a long, long moment.

 

He doesn’t even feel anything. 

At least for a long moment. 

 

And then fear, and anger, and terror, and self-hatred, and panic rise, and he flies down the stairs, rushes past Shiba and back towards Konoha, pushing all his strength into the long jumps. 

Shiba races to catch up to him, the big watchful eyes trained onto his face for a moment, before they drop to the thing in his hand.

 

Shiba’s voice is dark. “Damn.”

 

Kakashi snarls, and pushes more chakra into speed.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He bursts into Tsunade’s office, only a day later. He is sweaty and shivering, and he knows his gaze is wild. “Where are they.” He drops the thing onto her desk.

Tsunade looks up at him, dark rings under her eyes. Her fingers reach out to glide over the skin. “I sent Shikamaru after Sasuke. He took Naruto, Kiba, Neji and Choji.”

Kakashi’s eyes flash. “Sasuke is gone? And you sent genins after him.” I know he did not go willingly… or at least I hope so. And you sent him??

Tsunade inhales, slowly, obviously reining in her temper. “Asuma and Shikaku are bringing the traitors before the daimyo. They needed to take several join with them. Kurenai is with Hinata. You were near Amegakure. A lot of the other experienced jonins are dead.” She grimaces, and then throws the snake against the wall, leaving an ugly mess of flesh to drop off of it. Her eyes flash. “Jiraiya left with Ibiki and a few others for Sunagakure. They requested a meeting with me personally. I could only convince them to accept another Sannin in my stead.” She hisses. “Ahhh, I should have KNOWN he would pick this moment to make his move.” She chuckles darkly. “And I should have known that Danzo would try to use him.”

Kakashi swallows, harshly willing his emotions down. “Do we know what happened?”

She shakes her head once. “Only that the barrier was disturbed by four chakra signatures. There were traces of a fight. The Anbu say that there were dead snakes lying around.” She hesitates, her hazel eyes locking with his. “Anko says that a snake like that is able to distribute curse marks. Or enhance existing ones.”

Kakashi blinks, the muscles in his jaw jumping. “You think the attackers injected more of it into Sasuke? To… turn him?” To make him malleable?

She sighs, rubbing the bridge of her nose. “I don’t know. I only know that the intruders are gone, and Sasuke is too. Sakura says she met him on the way out of the village, and that he seemed… off.”

Kakashi frowns. “Off?”

Tsunade nods, sighing again. “Yes. Even darker than usual. Indifferent to everything.”

“Mhhh.” He grimaces. “While Sasuke has always been rather aloof scratching on condescending he was far from indifferent when I left him.”

Tsunade nods. “Exactly.” She inhales deeply. “Danzo reappearing at that inn was no coincidence.”

Kakashi smiles grimly, tasting bile. “No.” He looks over at the snake. And the snake was a big ‘fuck you’ message. He swallows, harshly. “I need to go after Sasuke.” And Naruto. He sniffs, his voice almost inaudible. “Both Danzo and Orochimaru would be well pleased if Sasuke would manage to awaken the Mangekyo sharingan. Or at least the third tomoe.”

Tsunade looks at him, her eyes seeming very old for a moment, frowning at the implications. “Indeed.” She sighs. “Damn. I hadn’t thought about that.” They share a look for a moment. She nods at him. “Go, Kakashi. But I insist you eat something, first. I sent Genma, Shizune and two other jonins after them already.”

He grimaces. “I’m fine.” He hesitates. “Where’s Pakkun?” Shiba is exhausted. 

Tsunade raises her eyebrows. “Waiting for you next to the gate.” She reaches into her desk, and throws him a small paper-wrapped package. “My lunch. Eat it on the way.” 

He inclines his head. “Thank you.”

She grimaces. “Good hunting.”

 

He turns, a single thought in his mind.

 

Please. Let me make it in time.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The chakra is like a flame, flaring into the sky. A punch to the stomach, bringing dread with it.

 

No, no, no, no. Not that chakra.

This isn’t good.

 

Kakashi lowers his head, and puts even more of his chakra into the jumps, the trees rushing by. 

His muscles ache, and his lungs burn. There is thunder, rolling in the distance.

 

His tattoo burns.

 

And then the rain starts, the river churning in its bed.

 

Of course its here. 

 

You’re like them.

Both of you.

 

 

A flash of light in the distance, like lightning. 

 

Falling.

 

 

 

 

 

 

No.

 

 

Please. 

 

 

 

 

 

No.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi cannot name the emotion that is choking him, the pitch black darkness that churns within him.

 

He doesn’t really feel anything. Not the rain, not the strain, not the wind.

 

For a long, long moment, he only stares down at the little orange thing, lying in a heap in the shallow water at the bottom of the waterfall. 

Next to a sodden and scratched hitai-ate.

 

Pakkun presses into him, into his leg. His voice is low. “Boss. We need to get down there.”

Kakashi doesn’t move. Cannot. He blinks, tiredly, the rain on his lashes tasting salty. 

Pakkun’s voice turns insistent. “Kakashi. Get down there. He’s not dead.”

Kakashi blinks again, his gaze falling down to his nin-ken. Slowly. The word takes an enormous amount of energy to shape. “What?”

Pakkun actually growls at him. “He’s not dead. Move it!”

 

Kakashi blinks, and then the words reach his brain. He stares at Pakkun for a moment, and then jumps down, with a curse.

He stumbles over to Naruto, falling onto his knees next to him.

 

For a long moment, he just looks at him, at the way the chest rises and falls, with shallow breaths. He swallows, his gaze traveling along Naruto’s body. There is a scorch mark around a torn area on his right shoulder, and Kakashi stares at it for a long moment, stares, knowing what it means intellectually, but refusing to acknowledge it emotionally. 

Something deep, deep within him shatters.

 

He sniffs, reaching for the hitai-ate.

Pakkun’s voice is dark. “It’s Sasuke’s.” 

Kakashi nods, carefully placing it onto Naruto’s stomach.

Pakkun licks his snout, with a sidelong gaze. “I guess Sasuke did get the possibility to awaken his Mangekyo sharingan after all. At the very least the third tomoe.”

Kakashi laughs, cackles, viciously, for a moment. Another tear falls, and he squeezes his eyes shut, before picking Naruto up gently. He’s so light. He looks down at the unconscious boy, the face smudged and pale, but healed and whole-looking. He looks and feels like a doll. For a moment he wonders if the seal is visible right now, the tattoo on his arm now weirdly silent. 

He turns to the shore, and then towards Konoha, keeping Naruto in his arms. 

His gaze only flickers up from time to time, to mark the way, before it returns to Naruto’s face.

Pakkun follows him, silently. 

 

He keeps Naruto in his arms, bridal style, for long hours. 

Jumping from tree to tree, carefully, silently. 

Watching, almost breathlessly, for any sign of life.

 

He prays to the only god that’s left.

 

Come on, you damn monster. Heal him already.

Wake him up.

 

I dare you.

 

I fucking dare you.

 

 

The rain stops at some point. 

The wind still rustles the leaves, this the only sound he hears outside the shallow breath that his attention is locked onto.

 

Finally, eventually, the breath deepens.

There is a small sigh, as Naruto slips from unconsciousness into actual exhausted sleep.

 

Kakashi stops, high up in the branches, and closes his eyes. 

Relief thunders through him, so potent he cannot feel it. 

His legs shake, the knees buckling.

 

Relief gives way to self-hatred, allowed, now, that he is safe. The black tendrils deep within Kakashi pull at his soul, drag him ever deeper.

His thoughts keep running in circles.

 

How could you let this happen.

How could you leave him alone.

How could you let him get hurt.

How could you.

 

How could you.

 

 

He sniffs, and looks down into that almost angelic seeming peaceful face, the golden hair glinting in the sunlight filtering in through the trees.

A porcelain doll, dashed in gold. 

Filled with power.

 

So fragile looking, easy to break.

 

Bile rises, burning in Kakashi’s mouth. 

Suddenly he cannot look at Naruto anymore, cannot bear the thought of that blue gaze opening to him. Watching him, like he had done. Seeing too much.

 

He carefully shifts Naruto and takes the scratched hitai-ate, puts it into Naruto’s jacket. And then shifts to carry Naruto on his back, the head settling on his shoulder.

Warm breath puffing at his neck. 

Warmth that does nothing to warm his very core.

 

Kakashi clasps Naruto’s hands in his, and continues to travel back to Konoha, on shaking legs.

 

One jump.

 

And another. Come on. 

You can do it.

 

Another.

 

He blinks, the world blurry for a moment.

 

 

Another.

 

 

When the medical team finally shows up the darkness within has tightened to resolve. 

Has locked its claws tightly, deep into his heart.

 

 

He dismisses them nonetheless, simply unable to let go.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Tsunade is the one who takes Naruto from him, finally, silently. 

Naruto, who has been awake for a while now, clinging to him. Also silently.

Naruto, whose heart has thundered against his back.

Naruto, whose hands have locked with his. 

 

Naruto who had clenched his legs around Kakashi’s waist, clinging to him.

Naruto, who had shook his head, when Tsunade had reached for him.

 

Naruto, who walks into the hospital with Tsunade now, not offering resistance, after she had insisted.

After she had pulled him from Kakashi.

Pried. 

 

Kakashi watches him disappear, the door closing, and now, now his tattoo burns once more, and he laughs out, loudly, ending in a sob. 

 

Shizune’s next to him, somehow, her eyes soft, and yet filled with alert. “Go home for now, Kakashi-san. Clean up and come back?”

 

He shakes her hand off his shoulder.

 

 

The world is blurry.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

There’s a knock on his door, loud, insistent. 

 

Recurring.

 

 

Kakashi opens the door, releases the repellant jutsu, after an hour or so. 

Still in his wet clothes. His soiled, worn-for-days clothes.

 

Jiraiya glowers at him, but there’s something in his eyes that… Kakashi cannot bear right now.

He turns on his heel, lets Jiraiya stand there, at the door.

 

Returns to his couch, sitting on it silently.

Staring into space.

 

The click of the closing door is loud, somehow.

 

Jiraiya settles in Kakashi’s armchair, his long white hair touching the floor. 

 

Kakashi stares at it, watches it shift, when Jiraiya leans forward. His voice is hard. “You’re going to shower now. And then eat.”

Kakashi blinks. And keeps staring.

 

Jiraiya exhales loudly. His voice carries a weird undertone. “Fine.”

He stands up, and steps over to Kakashi. Settles in the small place between Kakashi and the end of the couch, dominating the little space.

Kakashi’s breath is shallow, his fight or flight impulse tearing him whichever way. He averts his gaze.

Jiraiya’s voice is soft now, unrelenting. The words precise, like weapons, finding their mark. “Naruto is alive. You weren’t too late. Sasuke didn’t manage to kill Naruto with your chidori. This is not your fault.”

Something tears itself out of Kakashi’s throat, a sound, like from a wounded animal.

 

Jiraiya watches him, the dark eyes almost cold.

His voice sounds… faraway. “I’ve known the state you are in now.” He smiles softly, more to himself and then reaches out, clasps his big hand around Kakashi’s neck. “Let me help you.” He blinks, watching Kakashi, who is staring at him, now close to hyperventilating.

 

“I…” He grimaces, trying to clear his throat, but his body is unresponsive, and his voice stays scratchy. “I can feel it.”

Jiraiya frowns. “Feel it?”

Kakashi nods, looking down at his shivering hand, the words a whisper. “I know how it felt when Sasuke punched through Naruto.” He sobs, a tear dropping. “I can see the blood.”

Jiraiya sighs, understanding coloring his voice. “You have to use chidori with an active sharingan. It has recorded every instance of you using it. ” He sighs again, with a shake of his head. “But that doesn’t mean that you did this, Kakashi.”

 

Kakashi’s laugh is humorless. “No, I just taught him how to.”

He presses his hand to his mouth. 

Copper, and the taste and smell of it, everywhere.

 

Jiraiya leans in. Reiterating. “Let me help you.”

 

Kakashi frowns, something in him breaking, and then he nods jerkily, his mind in chaos, body shivering. “Please. Just…” Make this stop. 

 

Warmth, around the wrist. 

And the scratches of bones.

 

Bile rises, and he starts to scratch at the skin of his hands, swallowing compulsively. 

Jiraiya takes his hands with his other one, carefully stills their movement. 

The hand on Kakashi’s neck starts to knead, softly but surely. 

 

For a long moment, nothing happens.

 

And then, Kakashi leans in.

He’s not sure why. He just needs… something.

Please.

 

His cheek leans against Jiraiya’s, their breath shared for a long moment.

Jiraiya’s fingers are still kneading, put they press now, too, press Kakashi into him.

There’s a sob, stuck somewhere in Kakashi’s throat.

 

He cannot breathe.

Darkness shimmers and tempts, and he wants it, wants it all to be over.

For a while at least.

 

Or for how long he’s granted peace.

 

The hand on his neck shifts, pulls at his mask. The cloth drags chafingly over his skin as it is pulled down, and then there’s lips, pushing his mouth open, and breath, forcing him to breathe.

Pushing into him, past the constriction in his throat.

Making him breathe.

 

Something in him rebels, begging for the blessed darkness.

No, no, no, no, no.

He pushes at the vest, at the shoulders, half-heartedly.

Jiraiya’s fingers shift back to his neck, tighten. 

Keep him.

Easily.

 

The sob tears itself from Kakashi’s throat, finally, echoes within them.

 

Jiraiya hums, and then touches his tongue to Kakashi’s.

 

 

Kakashi will later remember how it was like floodgates opened, like light exploding, but right now, here, he cannot think, cannot … be anything else than a being made of instant need, almost climbing all over Jiraiya and into him, needing this promise of feeling something else, something different. 

 

It’s as if all his life-force latches onto that promise.

 

Jiraiya hums into him and then starts kissing him properly, sucking on his tongue in a way that makes the hairs in Kakashi’s neck stand up. The hand holding his releases and glides around Kakashi’s hips, starting to knead Kakashi’s ass in a manner so direct the resulting jolt of lust through Kakashi is almost debilitating. Fingers press down, through cloth, and Kakashi hisses, into the wet and sloppy kiss, and Jiraiya chuckles, pushing up suddenly, with Kakashi in his arms.

 

It’s unbearably hot to be picked up, just like that.

To give up control like that.

 

Kakashi groans, harshly, and then locks his legs around Jiraiya’s waist. Feels the bulging hardness below his groin, and then all thought is gone as Jiraiya tilts his head further, and pushes his tongue deep. Repeatedly.

Emulating.

 

Kakashi’s eyes roll up into his head.

 

This is different from all and anything what he had with Iruka. 

Very different. 

Both less… and more. 

There’s something missing… something connected to feelings. Something tender. 

 

Instead, this is tethered tightly to his animal hindbrain, flaring with simplified intensity. 

 

He lets himself fall into the feeling, this base want. 

 

Jiraiya smells spicy somehow, and he tastes… wild. 

Kakashi groans, starting to suck on his tongue. Jiraiya hums in appreciation and then walks over to the wall, presses into Kakashi. Kakashi threads his hands through the white mane, moaning sharply when Jiraiya rolls his hips into him. 

The hand on Kakashi’s ass shifts, pushes his leg up a bit to reach, and then rubs rhythmically at his perineum and Kakashi undulates, breaking the kiss with a groan. 

Jiraiya growls and starts attacking Kakashi’s throat, mouthing, lapping, sucking, biting, while still pressing hypnotizingly with his fingers and Kakashi whines, feeling precome wet his clothes. 

A particularly sharp bite makes him shout and then hiss, and Jiraiya groans into the juncture of his neck and shoulder and that shouldn’t be so hot, should it, and Jiraiya shifts, carrying him to his bedroom.

The world tilts as Jiraiya bodily shoves him down onto the futon and then starts to tear Kakashi’s clothes off, not giving him a moment to think, to doubt, nothing beyond this base want, right now, there. 

Jiraiya looks up at him from where he’s pulling off Kakashi’s pants off, and then crawls up, and the want in Kakashi twists, and he’s pushing Kakashi’s hitai-ate off and rasping into Kakashi’s ear. “Hands over your head.”

Kakashi moans, deeply, doing as he says, his eyelids fluttering, and Jiraiya binds his hands loosely with the headband, the cold metal between his palms. And then he grins and pushes Kakashi’s mask back up, beyond his mouth and nose, to settle as a thin strip of cloth over his eyes, as a makeshift blindfold. 

 

The sound that leaves Kakashi’s mouth is far beyond decent and Jiraiya laughs delightedly, saucily, one hand running down to cup Kakashi’s balls matter-of-factly. “So much need in you.” He clicks his tongue, and his weight shifts a bit, and Kakashi can feel Jiraiya’s gaze roam over his laid out form. His voice is a dark whisper, a caress. “Normally, I prefer to take my partners from behind… and I am rather proficient at that, no matter the gender.” There is a whisper of cloth, and then a tongue, flicking at Kakashi’s left nipple. 

Kakashi gasps, with a shudder. 

Jiraiya hums, using his teeth until Kakashi is writhing beneath him, hissing and groaning. 

And leaking. 

Jiraiya’s voice sounds a bit labored. “But you, I want to see. While you cannot. I will make you scream. That’s a promise.” He leans down, whispering directly into Kakashi’s ear, his hair tickling Kakashi’s armpit. “And I will not engage a privacy seal.”

Kakashi mewls, deep in his throat, another jolt of lust tightening within him. 

Jiraiya licks into his ear, making him jerk. “But it’s not the best position, especially since you’re bound to be tight, aren’t you.” He licks along the shell of Kakashi’s ear, dips his tongue in until another deep moan tears itself from Kakashi’s throat. “How long has it been, hmmm?”

A finger, twisting Kakashi’s right nipple. “How long has it been since you were taken? Answer me.”

Kakashi gasps, arching into the pleasure-pain. “Years.”

 

Jiraiya sucks on his earlobe, and then licks down the column of his throat and then down his chest, his hair dragging down Kakashi’s body after him and Kakashi knows what’s coming of course, but it doesn’t help, the moment Jiraiya’s tongue touches his cock rushing through him viciously, his orgasm gathering. There’s pressure at the base of his cock suddenly, staving it off and Jiraiya’s voice, chuckling, against it. “Not so fast. I want to enjoy myself properly.”

 

Kakashi groans harshly, and then Jiraiya starts to suckle on him, lick him and finally deep throat him and Kakashi writhes helplessly within moments, almost there, almost there, oh god, and then Jiraiya hums, and Kakashi undulates, and Jiraiya’s fingers loosen, and it’s enough, and pleasure slams through Kakashi, and he cries out, and then Jiraiya pulls off the moment he comes, squeezing his come from him in pulses, the sensation so intense Kakashi cannot breathe once more, and he tries to get away from the oversensitivity, but Jiraiya doesn’t let him, pumping him until he’s all spent, done, falling bonelessly onto his mattress. 

Whimpering. 

 

He can hear Jiraiya smack his lips. “You are delicious.” A small pause in which Kakashi absentmindedly knows that Jiraiya is once more taking him in. His voice is dark, base when he speaks again. “And now, I’m going to fuck your own come into you again. Use it to make you take me. Use it to make it pleasurable for you once more.”

 

Kakashi jerks, helplessly turned on again by his words, blushing violently. 

Jiraiya chuckles, and then breathes the words. “Spread your legs, Kakashi. For me.”

Oh god. Kakashi is suddenly very glad for his blindfold, embarrassed and turned on beyond reason, despite having come just moments before, helplessly spreading his legs and feeling the blush creep down to his chest, feeling hot and cold all over. 

Fingers touch him, wet fingers, and two press in, gently but firmly, unrelentingly, and Kakashi sobs, wanting and needing and hating, there, that place that needs now but was his, and he’s gone, because of it all, and it’s not fair, and god yes please, more, and Jiraiya reaches, and presses and Kakashi shivers, spreading his legs even more.

Jiraiya hums in appreciation and now it’s three fingers, and something slick and lukewarm being pushed into him, used to ease the glide, and it’s so dirty and perfect and the squelching sounds make the hairs on his body stand up, and he draws his legs up with a moan, silently begging for more. 

Knowing he probably looks debauched already.

 

Jiraiya is silent, his other hand gliding along Kakashi’s right inner thigh to hold the knee up, tilting his hips even further.

The fingers within him burn a bit, come not exactly the best there is as lube, but the fire is tempered by their tips stroking expertly against his prostate on every stroke in, every stroke out, just gently, teasing, stoking. 

He knows he is moaning constantly, but he cannot hear himself over the rushing in his ears, the only thing that is real those fingers, tugging the pleasure back glide by glide. 

Jiraiya’s voice is a whisper, reaching him over the waves of sedate pleasure he pulls so masterfully from him. “Do you want the burn?”

Kakashi gasps, knowing he’s asking if he should go to four fingers, shivering when he tries to imagine how… big Jiraiya might be. Given that the Sannin is easily half a head taller and much broader… Kakashi cannot think, want pooling in his gut.

He licks his lips, his voice raspy, giving the only answer he has. “Now.”

 

Jiraiya chuckles and then withdraws his fingers, slowly, and there is rustling of cloth, and the anticipation is killing Kakashi, the fact that he knows that Jiraiya is undressing only now, deliberately, quietly, purposefully… he shivers, the need rising another notch.

 

And then Jiraiya’s broad and powerful body glides over his, covers him, dwarfs him, the heat a furnace but the skin smooth and cold somehow. The hair tickles everywhere, and Jiraiya’s lips are hot, gliding along his throat, while he pushes Kakashi’s legs up, over his shoulders. The broad head of his cock catches, pressing just gently, promising. Kakashi feels light-headed. 

Jiraiya’s voice is a caress. “Ready?”

 Kakashi mewls deep in his throat, and Jiraiya pushes up even more, bending him in half, his mouth pressing onto Kakashi’s and the hot hardness breaches him shallowly, holds, lets the burn flare up and fade again, lets his cock make room for itself. 

 

Kakashi groans, and opens his mouth, to receive the kiss, knowing. Feeling split open, in half. 

Jiraiya pushes his tongue in at the same the moment he pushes his cock in, just a bit, withdrawing almost immediately, and then doing it again, and again, and again, until Kakashi is sobbing under him, desperate for more, desperate to have him all, his body aching and wanting, and he tries to lock his legs to draw Jiraiya in, but the big Sannin is having none of it, shifting up and breaking the kiss to push his legs even higher, holding his feet by the ankles. 

It’s vaguely uncomfortable, and his re-hardening cock is pressed up along his stomach and chest, but the angle is… 

Jiraiya bottoms out, with a precise roll of his hips, and a jolt of pleasure makes the darkness before Kakashi’s eyes sparkle. 

Jiraiya laughs gently, his voice somewhat labored now, too. “And now, I’m going to plunder you, Kakashi. And you’ll scream.”

 

Oh god. 

 

He tries to prepare himself, but it’s not use, the moment Jiraiya starts to really fuck into him, with sharp, precise rolls of his hips, on every bottoming out so devastatingly and elegantly destructive… Kakashi is a writhing, babbling, sobbing mess within moments. 

 

The slaps are loud between them, and the grunts and moans are too, and he’s crying out now on every slap, and he’s gritting his teeth, and there’s wetness pooling on his chest, and Jiraiya is growling, and there’s nothing else, and then Jiraiya lets go of his ankles again, allows his legs to fall open a bit, surging up to kiss him again, sloppily, deeply, and he’s grinding Kakashi through the mattress now, his heavy weight keeping Kakashi tethered to the earth, and his hair is scratching along Kakashi’s oversensitive skin, and Kakashi can feel himself come again, blindingly and yet as if in an afterthought.

 

He does scream when the orgasm breaks.

 

Jiraiya fucks him through the oversensitivity, growling.

And then fucks him some more.

 

Kakashi kisses him, wildly, ravenously, held down and protected by Jiraiya’s big body and feeling like floating. Raw, hurting, shivering, needing. He never wants it to stop.

 

Jiraiya stills when he finally comes, the pulsing deep within a benediction. 

A blessing.

 

Forgiveness.

 

Kakashi isn’t aware that he starts crying.

 

Jiraiya holds him against his broad chest, gently, carefully, leaning slightly over him, his hair a curtain of white, keeping the world out.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“How do you feel?”

 

Kakashi grunts, carefully lowering himself onto the sofa. Sounding truly sated even to his own ears. He also has a headache, and his eyes are puffy. Still. “As if somebody removed all the energy from my muscles and turned them to goo.”

Jiraiya chuckles, blowing onto his tea, dressed in his vest only and definitely not the slightest bit uncomfortable or embarrassed. “Glad to be of service.”

Kakashi snorts, coloring just slightly. He shoots Jiraiya a look. “I…” And I hadn’t even showered. He draws a hand down his face, his ears burning.

Jiraiya interjects, shaking his head once. “Don’t worry. We’re not going to make this weird. It was something you needed. And I was happy to provide.” He grins rather lewdly, and then laughs ferociously as Kakashi blushes even more. 

Kakashi shakes his head one, picking at a non-existing fluff on his hastily put on pants. “Just like that?”

Jiraiya looks at him, his dark eyes sparkling. “Why not?”

Kakashi shrugs, a bit listlessly. 

Jiraiya tilts his head. “I think the main problem here is you haven’t really had sex without any strings, right? You’ve been in this emotional mess for so long and from such a young age it never occurred to you that people would just desire you for… yourself.” He lets his eyes travel over Kakashi’s body in a rather suggestive way. “Trust me, you could have people lusting after you without much effort.”

Kakashi snorts a laugh, rubbing his face. “Yeah, but… “ He shakes his head. “I don’t… “ He shrugs, his thoughts flitting to Asuma for a moment. He clears his throat.

Jiraiya shrugs as well. “Suit yourself. And feel free to ask for an encore, if you like.”

Kakashi clears his throat again, nodding once, not trusting his voice. 

 

Jiraiya sobers a bit, his voice sterner. “And while I’m happy to… fuck your depression out of you - to put it a bit crudely - and, whenever you need it, you really need to do something about these bouts of self-hatred you carry around, Kakashi. That’s not healthy.” He raises his cup. “But I told you that before.“

Kakashi snorts, looking out the window for a long moment. He shakes his head once. “Want to eat something?”

Jiraiya weighs his head. “Why don’t we go out and to a restaurant later. For now…” He clicks his tongue. “Let’s talk a bit more.”

Kakashi grimaces.

 

Jiraiya watches him, his own face suddenly serious. His tone is vaguely wistful. “When we talked about our reasons to leave Konoha the other day, I said that I came back to make sure that Naruto was taken care of.”

Kakashi blinks, raising his eyes to Jiraiya’s.

Who tilts his head. “I have to admit, I had qualms about being close to Naruto. At first.”

Kakashi frowns. “You had qualms about being close to him? Why?”

Jiraiya smiles softly. “I told you. He looks so much like them… it’s scary. Is so much like them, it is baffling.” He chuckles. “Remember, Minato was a prodigy, like you, I have known him from a very young age. He…” Jiraiya trails off for a moment, looking out of the window. “He was a lot more earnest, as you know, but as a kid, he had moments where he also would exude this mischievousness, this playfulness. This irreverence. And Kushina…” Jiraiya chuckles. “The flaming red hair fit perfectly with her personality, the sheer force of it. Her fierce loyalty. Her kindness. Her warmth.”

Jiraiya sobers, pain flitting across his features. “I was supposed to take the boy but couldn’t, and secretly I was glad. And I was glad that fate had appointed you, so to speak.”

Kakashi swallows, looking away. 

 

Jiraiya’s big hand finds his knee. “I wish to apologize for that.”

Kakashi sniffs, and shakes his head. “Ahh, forget it.” He smiles a little, brittle, fake smile. “I totally understand. You didn’t want to be hurt even more.”

Jiraiya hums, and nods. “Indeed.” He exhales, and then grins, broadly. “That is why the next Icha Icha book will be for you!”

Kakashi blinks. “What?”

Jiraiya chuckles. “Has your love for them cooled down?”

Kakashi blushes. “Err… no. But you don’t need to dedicate one to me, that’s…” He blinks, trying to deflect. “Naruto told me you’re still missing something in it?”

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow. “That is true.” He waves off. “Ah, it’ll drop into place.” He grins. “Any wishes?” He leans in. “Maybe in regards to looks?”

Kakashi shakes his head wildly, refusing to blush even more. “Err. No. Thank you.”

Jiraiya snickers quietly. “Suit yourself.”

 

They are silent for a moment, and something in Kakashi relaxes further, the darkness very far down, safely locked away again. For now. 

Jiraiya clicks his tongue, eventually. “I always thought that Minato was the child of prophecy.”

Kakashi frowns. “The child of prophecy?”

Jiraiya hums, with a nod. “Yes, the toad elder gave me a prophecy once. He said that I would be Sensei to the one who would change our world - for better or for worse.” He shakes his head, once. “Years ago… When I taught Minato I was sure it would be him.”

Kakashi’s voice is flat. “But you’re not so sure now.”

Jiraiya shrugs. “I know you’ve felt it, too.”

Kakashi leans forward, elbows on his knees, and puts his face into his hands. His voice is muffled. “You really believe in all that?”

Jiraiya cackles. “Ah, well, I mean, look at our whole world? The tattoos, the prophecies, the beliefs… Fate is… quirky.” He smirks.

Kakashi shakes his head, though not in denial. “That it is.”

Jiraiya hums. “Naruto told me you left the sword of that water ninja at his grave… making an interesting comment regarding that yourself.”

Kakashi sighs, and shrugs, dropping his hands. “As you said. Fate can be quirky.”

Jiraiya smirks. “Indeed.”

 

Kakashi stares at him, unseeing. “That mission… it’s when the fox…” He hesitates, grimacing. “How do I put it. Bled out?” He shakes his head. “That is when the fox bled out the first time. There were reflections of a tail in those ice mirrors… And yesterday…”

Jiraiya’s voice is dark, serious. “Yesterday, you felt it again.”

Kakashi’s eyes return to his. “I felt like those tails would strangle all hope. Would snuff out all light.”

“Hmmmm.” Jiraiya sighs, deeply. “I think a lot of our time together will be spent just trying to get him to use that energy properly.”

Kakashi smiles bravely, nods, once. 

 

Jiraiya watches him for a long moment, and then asks, his voice deliberately light once more. “Wanna go shower now and have me show you what I’m really good at?” He smiles wolfishly, and Kakashi blushes, violently. Jiraiya chuckles, with a little leer. “Not that I didn’t like what we did before… but… I think I deserve to smell and taste you clean, too, hmmm? And then I can show you what advantages age brings in regards to stamina.”

 

Kakashi hides his burning face behind his hands.

And nods, with a helpless shiver of excitement. “Sure.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Jiraiya leaves him to go to Naruto in the afternoon.

After a romp in the shower that will have Kakashi blushing for a while whenever he takes one.

After eating some fried rice with him after all, both too relaxed and tired to bother to go out.

 

 

After soothing Kakashi’s soul with his presence.

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi stares at the wall now, and tries to breathe.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

No, Jiraiya is not going to leave with Naruto without Kakashi saying a proper goodbye first, no worries :)

Chapter 21: A godfather's promise

Notes:

Sorry for the day delay, RL is rather busy rn. AND: I‘m gonna take a bit more time between updates to have enough time to keep my ‘lead‘ (no worries, for now I’ll go for Saturdays, and see how that works!)… I‘m ~ unedited 90k ahead of you, but bc of the format and the changes I have to check things quite a lot… due to the darn virus I cannot sit at my kid’s sports class anymore (where I’m usually happily typing away while waiting^^) but have to go back and forth… which strips approx. 4k in writing (time), lol. So I have to find that time somewhere else, sorry 💕

Also: bc I was asked: the timeskip will happen in this and the next chapter, no 10 Naruto-less chapters, no worries 😊, though what happens in the next is rather important too imho. 🤗

 

AND: I realized while preparing to post that I already hook into parts of Shippuden here... however, they have been adapted to the changes I made previously.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

His feet carry him by Sakura’s house the next morning, after staring at Obito’s name for so long the letters lost all sense of meaning.

 

After trying to reach. 

Without any kind of echo. 

 

Fool. 

 

He’s dead. 

 

It must be something else.

 

Someone else.

 

 

It just cannot be. 

 

Can it?

 

 

 

The tree he spoke to Sasuke in is empty, too, deserted. Where are you now? Is he forcing you? Flattering you? Are you hurt? Are you practicing your new Mangekyou sharingan? Are you laughing with him and Kabuto?

Is Danzo there?

 

Did they take your eyes?

 

He sighs, deeply, and wills the self-hatred and bile down. We‘ll bring you back. 

 

He frowns, amending. Knowing, somehow.

He‘ll bring you back. 

 

 

He lightly knocks on the door, deeply relieved when Sakura herself opens the door instead of her parents, the overly excited temperament of them both not something he is in the mood for right now.

She smiles, but her eyes are dead, flat. He has to give it to her though, her words and chipper tone would fool others. But I know. “Sensei! I thought we were off duty until Naruto has healed?”

Kakashi grimaces, knowing that Tsunade had put Naruto into a bed with lots of wrappings and bandages simply to get him to stay put for a while. 

To be able to run some tests.

 

He swallows, trying to speak past the instant guilt for this whole mess that wants to rise. “Err, no. I mean yes. Forgive me. Can I come in for a moment?”

She blinks at him, and then invites him in. 

He lightly walks up the stairs, waits until she points at chair at the table. The small dining area is kept in soft colors and decorated with little warm touches, a flower in a vase, and a book, off to the side. 

She hesitates, and then offers him tea, a bit haltingly. He waves at her. "No, thank you, Sakura-chan.“ He gives her an eye-smile. She just stares at him, wide-eyed, and he sighs, deeply. Guess I’m not the only one hurting, huh. He snorts softly to himself, and then shakes his head at her inquiring look. "I wanted to talk to you about the future of your training.“

She frowns, and then finally sits down as well, across from him. 

 

Kakashi exhales, the words on his tongue feeling like tar, choking him. "I… have to retire team 7 for the time being.“

She stares at him, and suddenly there’s fire in her, her green eyes flashing. Her fist hits the table. "What do you mean Sensei?? You’re not giving up on Sasuke!!" She points a finger at him, shaking with rage. "You said it would be alright!!“

Kakashi blinks, and then conversely smiles, a part of him relieved to see the flames fanned. He holds up his hand. "Mah, mah, forgive me, no.“ He sighs. "But…“ He looks away for a moment. "Jiraiya-sama is going to take Naruto on a trip.“

She frowns, her finger lowering. "A trip?“

He nods. And then clears his throat. "You surely heard rumors?“

She stares at him, and then blushes. "I… err… yes.“

He clicks his tongue. Oh oh. I bet that’ll be interesting. "Which ones.“

She grimaces, wringing her hands. "Well, I mean, he‘s this author of these books…“ She ducks her head. "The ones you like to read?“

He blinks, slowly, noting the connection she adds to him especially with a bit of a sinking feeling. "What else?“

She hides her face behind her hands. Continues, bravely. "That you and he…“ She trails off, beet red. 

Kakashi refuses to clear his throat. Rumor travels fast indeed. "And?“

Her voice is muffled. "That he‘s somehow connected to the fact that the jonins actually treat Naruto with respect now?“

Kakashi nods, with a sigh. And then narrows his eyes at her. "Anything else?“

Anything… in regards to him?

She hesitates, and then shakes her head, slowly. 

 

Oh well.

He waits a moment, and then clicks tongue. "Jiraiya-sama is Naruto’s godfather.“ He waits until her hands lower a bit, her eyes huge and alert. "He wasn’t able to take him back then, but he will take him for training now. For a while.“ He frowns. "A long while.“

She frowns, her eyes dulling a bit.

He sighs, looking out the window. "He is one of the Sannin.“ He looks back at her. "Sasuke went to Orochimaru, who is also one of them.“ He tilts his head, not giving into the urge to give her reassurances that would be lies now, anyways. "You do know who the other one is. I told you.“

She nods, mutely. 

He gives her a small smile. "Tsunade-sama is an expert at chakra control. A skill you also excel at. I believe she should be your teacher.“

Sakura stares at him, chewing on her lip. 

Kakashi leans forward, locks their gazes. "But you have to win her favor yourself.“

Sakura looks away, frowning. "Why, Sensei?“ She shrugs, vaguely apologetic. "I mean, Jiraiya-sama is taking Naruto by himself, too, isn’t he?“

Kakashi laughs, gently. "Yes. But our Godaime might be a bit more pressed, time-wise. You will have to convince her you want this and can do it.“

Sakura looks down at the table, her voice small. "You think I can do this?“

He reaches for her hand, clasps it for a moment. "I know you can.“ And I’ve already recommended you. He tilts his head, the truth coloring his voice. "Much better than anything I can teach you.“

My skills only bring death and destruction. 

She looks up at him, unblinking. 

And then she nods, once. "Alright, Sensei.“

 

He nods. 

And then makes his voice bored and stern, suddenly feeling like teasing. And… acknowledging. Telling. "And what I do in my free time is nobody’s business.“

Sakura colors again, instantly, and Kakashi lets her hang there, frozen under his gaze for a long moment, before he gives her a wink, his voice deliberately… intimate. "But yes.“

She stares at him, and then groans, and her hands fly up to her ears, and she scrunches her eyes shut, and she squeaks, and then jumps up and disappears into another room, and Kakashi laughs, loudly. 

And then sobers, the last chuckles dying in his throat. I‘m going to miss almost all of their puberty. All the pain and the fun that comes with it. Naruto‘ll be at least 15 when he’ll be back. 

He blinks. And if Tsunade takes Sakura… 

He swallows, and then gets up, calling to Sakura that he’ll leave now. 

Hears her pained groan, that’s nonetheless underlaid with... something. 

Kakashi smiles a bit bitterly. Ah yes, the age of confused excitement. He inhales deeply, descending the stairs. I skipped all that. He opens the door and looks at the sky for a moment. 

And almost laughs at the thought. 

Guess that’s why I‘m always confused now. 

 

He shakes his head at himself. 

 

Well. If the shoe fits. 

 

 

 

He turns said shoes towards the hospital. 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

There’s a huge toad, right in front of it.

Chewing on gum. Blowing bubbles.

People are looking at it a bit funnily, stepping past it carefully. 

It’s a bit to the side of the entrance, and it’s obviously a summon, so no-one really worries, but Kakashi cannot help but chuckle at the way that people try not to touch - and then do after all. 

He knows the skin is soft, not slick, even though it is coated with a thin film of it. 

But a lot of people apparently do not, their expressions rather funny to watch, going from irritation and even hidden disgust to amazement. 

The big toad just keeps on chewing, obviously enjoying the sun, and not minding the commotion it elicits.

Another bubble pops as he jumps up to the window sill it’s parked under, his muscles still protesting. I really overdid it the last few days. He harrumphs. And yesterday didn’t help with that either. He blushes, just lightly, and then knocks on the window.

 

Two sets of eyes turn to him, both lighting up.

Warmth rushes through him, shakes his very core.

Followed by immediate devastation, as his brain catches up with him, reminding him of the reason of his visit.

 

Jiraiya’s gaze gentles, full of understanding. He nods, his voice carefully enthusiastic. “Ahh, Kakashi. Perfect timing.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, and then climbs inside, his throat clicking as he speaks. “I see.” He reaches out, unable to help himself, flicking at a tuft of hair sticking out of an unneeded bandage. “Feeling better, Naruto?”

Naruto smirks at him, his eyes glowing. “I do now.”

Kakashi blinks, the simple words running havoc within him. He nods, unable to form any thought. Any words. 

Naruto’s eyes dull a bit again, shooting a look up at Jiraiya. “But I wasn’t able to bring back Sasuke.” He hesitates, and then the words tumble out, almost frantic. “Sasuke was as if exchanged. The curse mark was running amok. He grew wings, Sensei, and he was so full of hate, and he said he’d kill me and that he didn’t care if Orochimaru took his body, and…”

Jiraiya interjects, gently. “As I’ve said. We have time.” Kakashi looks up at him, and Jiraiya shrugs. “Orochimaru seems to have chosen a new body already, thanks to my Sensei. Since Sasuke wasn’t there yet…”

Kakashi nods, blinking, his voice gruff. Vaguely remembering reading about the forbidden jutsu during his Anbu time. “We have a few years before he can try again.”

Naruto exhales, his shoulders relaxing a bit. “So you concur, Sensei.” He blinks up at him. “That’s good.”

 

Kakashi sighs, and shifts his stance, hands deep in his pockets now, to hold on to something. He addresses Jiraiya. “You will go and train Naruto now?”

Jiraiya nods, smirking down at the boy. “Yes.”

Kakashi nods, swallowing harshly. 

Naruto blinks up at him, mutely. 

 

For a moment, their eyes catch, and something shivers between them.

 

Kakashi tears himself away, tries to seem nonchalant. 

Jiraiya’s voice is soft. “You know, Naruto, your Sensei will go and train, too!”

Naruto’s tone is excited. “He will?”

Kakashi looks back at Jiraiya, whose eyes sparkle at him. “Oh yes. He will go and train with Sora-san while we’re away.” He looks down at Naruto. “You know, the Sensei who trained Sakura.”

And we will see if I’m actually able to advance my sharingan. 

Kakashi frowns, Naruto pulling him back from his vague thoughts.

The tone is… indignant. “But then he cannot train Sakura? And that Sora-san can’t either? That’s not fair? I mean, if I go and train with you, what will become of her?”

Kakashi smirks softly, the display of kinship and camaraderie touching him deeply.

Jiraiya leans in before he can say anything though, his voice a conspiratorially whisper. “She’ll have an even better teacher.” 

“She will?” Naruto stares at him, his gaze flicking to Kakashi for a moment, obviously to gauge his reaction. Kakashi gives him an eye-smile. Better for her, definitely.

Jiraiya chuckles, and then reaches up to ruffle his hair. “Oh yes, and you will have to train hard to keep up with her I bet.”

Naruto pulls a face, mumbling something under his breath.

Jiraiya sighs softly. “Naruto. Why don’t you go wash up and get dressed.”

Naruto blinks at him, and then hops out of the bed, reaching for his obviously perfunctory cleaned orange tracksuit, and the bag with clean underwear and toiletries that someone put there. Kakashi blinks, guessing Iruka.

 

Jiraiya waits until the door behind Naruto closes.

His voice is soft. “I want you to go to Sora, and train your eye with her. Meditate and find your emotional equilibrium, too. Find some acceptance. I have already talked to Tsunade.” He hesitates, and his tone turns imploring. “Kakashi. If we are correct…” He clicks his tongue. “You might be the only one to stop him.” He sighs. “The only one who can.”

Kakashi grimaces, refusing to even think the name of him. His tone is gruff. “You want me to spend the next three years training the sharingan with her?”

Jiraiya sighs, shaking his head. “No. Tsunade will send you to Amegakure first I bet.” He hesitates. “Once, I spent some time there, and…” He trails off, grimacing, his eyes dark when they return to Kakashi’s. “You will need to find out what’s going on there. What Danzo is doing there.”

Kakashi looks away, and then nods, curtly. 

Jiraiya pushes himself up from he bed he’d been sitting on, stepping over to him, with a sigh. His big hand settles on Kakashi’s shoulder. “I will keep him safe.”

Kakashi nods, swallowing past the lump in his throat. “You’re going to take the toad to get away immediately?”

Jiraiya nods. “Yes, we’re going to hop over to Mount Myōboku for a quick introduction round. He already met Gamabunta and Gamatatsu. He needs to meet the others. And I need to see if I can pry any information from the elder.”

Kakashi frowns. “Will you train sage mode with him already?”

Jiraiya shakes his head. “No, his chakra control is still too instable thanks to the fox. This will actually be one of the main focuses of our trip, as I’ve told you. He probably won’t be back with dozens of new jutsus, but I’ll make damned sure he has precise control over it then.” He harrumphs. “Or as much as is possible.”

Kakashi nods, conceding the point. 

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow at him. “I want you to learn more about seals, too. Learn what they knew. Keep their skills alive for him.”

Kakashi frowns, sighing through his nose.

Jiraiya grins. “I know you mastered the curse mark sealing, don’t tell me you haven’t looked into it.”

Kakashi blushes lightly, looking away. “Only a few of them, though.”

“Hmmm.” Jiraiya tilts his head. “Minato taught you the flying thunder formation, didn’t he.”

Kakashi nods, with a shrug. “Yes, though I wasn’t able to master it then. He taught it to all Anbu in his squad.” He hesitates. “I might be the only one left knowing it though. So I cannot really use it, even if I would master it now.”

For a moment, he remembers their names, and faces. And their deaths.

Jiraiya pulls him back from his thoughts. “It would be quite nice if you would master the hiraishin kunai jutsu. Learn how to apply the seals from the ones still on them.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “I… that was one of Minato’s signature moves. I’m not sure that’s even possible for me. A seal is locked to the user?” He clears his throat. “Besides, those knives are lost to us.”

Jiraiya’s eyes glitter slyly. “But you have one.” He smiles sharply. “And Sora has one.”

Kakashi frowns. “She has?”

Jiraiya hums. “She got it as a gift from Kushina. Like you did from Minato.” He smiles gently. “Minato wanted to be able to reach you, both of you, whenever he needed to.”

Kakashi blinks, turning away, forcing the sudden tears down.

 

The door opens again, and Kakashi grimaces, inhaling deeply, before turning back around. 

Naruto comes in, silently, putting the hospital gown and the bandages onto the bed. He blinks up at them, and then goes through his little backpack, silently, and Kakashi watches him, watches as he carefully checks and then puts the frog purse away.

He swallows, harshly.

Jiraiya claps his hands. “Very well.” He looks back at Kakashi, continuing their previous conversation without giving Naruto context. “I put mine into Tsunade’s office, by the way. That could be practical, too.” 

Naruto frowns, and Kakashi blinks, but Jiraiya rubs his hands now, his tone gleeful, diverting Naruto’s attention. “Ready to go onto a trip, you little rascal?”

Naruto harrumphs, though Kakashi can see him blush in excitement. “You really up for it old man?”

Kakashi blinks, expecting Jiraiya to yell at Naruto, but he only chuckles. “Mhh. Try to keep up.” He shoots a look at Kakashi, and then nods at him. “Go and say goodbye to your Sensei.”

 

And just like that, with these simple words, the devastation is back.

 

Black tar, closing off his throat, making it difficult to breathe. A block of ice in his stomach. His vision is a tunnel, and he’s tethered to the ground, unable to move.

Words reach him, as if through fog, and his gaze falls down on Naruto, whose mouth is moving. He cannot hear the words, but suddenly there is a broad hand, on his shoulder, pressing him down, and his knees buckle, as his body obeys, sinking to its knees.

Naruto’s face comes closer, and then presses into his neck, and his arms go round Kakashi’s shoulders, and then his whole body presses close and Kakashi sobs, once.

Shaping the words is a terrible exercise, and one that is draining him, fast. “Naruto…” He blinks the tears away, tries to keep his voice level. Naruto’s arms tighten. “Naruto, just… come back safely.”

Naruto mumbles into his neck, the words puffing against the wet cloth of the mask. “I will. Sensei.”

Kakashi swallows, stroking the back, tilting his head to look up at Jiraiya, who is standing close, with an indecipherable expression on his face. Kakashi licks his lips, his throat clicking as he addresses the Sannin. “Black looks good on him, but he loves orange.”

Naruto sniffs, and presses his face even closer, a shudder running through him. Kakashi strokes his back again, swallowing harshly. “I will make sure Iruka and I will keep your plants alive.”

 

He squeezes his eyes shut for a long moment, and then withdraws, just a bit, the golden hair feathering along his skin as Naruto draws back a bit as well, but still hovers close. His voice is shaking now, but he doesn’t care, cannot care, his heart beating too fast, panic rising. 

He presses the words out, by sheer will, not looking up into those eyes. “Learn. Live and learn and meet people. Come into your own strength. Grow. Give Jiraiya-san a run for his money. Train hard, practice your summons and your finger signs and weapon skills.” A tear falls, and he sniffs. “Laugh. Enjoy your time. Experience…” He swallows, and continues, with an effort. “Experience new things. Test things.” He blinks, and finally raises his eyes to Naruto’s, locks them with the wide blue ones, that are crying silent tears. “Begin… to find out who you are and what you like.” Kakashi raises a shaking hand to Naruto’s face, cups it, for a moment. “Naruto.”

 

Naruto stares at him, mouth quivering, shaking under his hands.

 

Jiraiya sniffs, and clears his throat, and then booms at them, too loud, too exuberant, too cheery…  too painful. Clapping his hands. “Alright. Time for our adventure!”

 

Naruto gasps a sob, and steps back. 

Takes his backpack with shaking fingers and steps past Kakashi, without a look back.

 

Kakashi closes his eyes.

 

There is a rustle of cloth as Jiraiya bends down, for just a moment, hugging him, too.

 

And then they’re both gone, and there’s a cry of people outside as the big toad jumps, making the earth shake.

 

 

And the loss is a black hole, tearing him apart.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Pain bleeds from him, drips to the hospital floor.

 

He can almost see it, staring into space, unseeing.

He’s not sure how much time passes.

 

Only that Tsunade is there, at some point. 

Dragging him up and over to her hospital office. She puts him onto her couch there. Green chakra glows over his temple for a moment, and then the world drops away, spiraling into dream and Kakashi closes his eyes to his empty hand, reaching.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

She’s watching him when he wakes up, her hazel eyes carrying sympathy. Understanding, yes, but there’s pain in them, too. Pain that leaves no room for pity.

 

Kakashi clears his throat and sits up, with an effort. 

He blinks, trying to feel something, anything, but there is nothing. Not even his tattoo is burning. 

He gasps a laugh, not even sure why.

 

She quirks an eyebrow. “What is it?”

He shakes his head, opening his mouth and then closing it again, for a moment. All he manages is a whisper, eventually. “I don’t feel anything. Not… even the tattoo.”

She hums, her voice low. “You don’t allow yourself to feel.”

Kakashi barks another laugh. “That is what Jiraiya said, too.” He swallows, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose. “But…” He drops the hand, looking at her. “But why is the tattoo silent? I mean it sometimes burns, and sometimes doesn’t, I just…” He grimaces, shaking his head. 

Tsunade smirks at him, her eyes softening. “Kakashi, the tattoo‘s ink taps into your energy, your desire to reach for him. It burns when you long. Or, allow yourself to long.”

Kakashi stares at her, trying to remember the instances when he felt something, when he felt it burn. And when it was silent. His tongue feels thick in his mouth. “You mean…”

She tilts her head. “Whenever it had been silent was when your mind was wondering why your heart was refusing to feel too deeply, yes.”

He snorts, and then his face crumbles, and he fights the tears, for a long moment.

Her voice reaches him, from faraway. “Mine still burns, often.”

He sniffs, angrily wiping his eyes. “What a shit show.”

She snorts, and then bends to retrieve a tissue box, offering it to him. “Yes.”

He nods, and takes it, and she averts her gaze, giving him space to collect himself. 

 

She clicks her tongue, her tone a bit firmer, but drenched in kindness. “I took the liberty of calling your friends.”

He looks up at her, throwing the used tissue away into the bin. 

She smirks softly. “Go and get a hangover. While it’s no fix for anything it’ll do you good nonetheless. I need a few days to properly settle still and to decide what I’ll do.” Her face grows serious, the levity bleeding out. “And then we’ll all be very busy.”

 

Kakashi nods, and then pushes up. He hesitates, looking at her for a moment, before bowing to her. “Thank you, Godaime-sama.”

She smirks at him. “Go, Kakashi. Asuma and Guy are outside on the bench.”

 

He nods again and then leaves, the world feeling fuzzy and weird.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kurenai is there too, later, hugging him for a long moment. And then pressing a drink into his hand, and drowning it with him, with a curse.

Asuma hovers very close, too close even, sometimes clasping his shoulder for a moment. Kakashi drowns the red gaze of Kurenai’s all-seeing eyes in more sake. 

Guy is almost exhaustingly cheerful, his elation over the operation gone well and Lee fighting successfully with Gaara of all people against that bone kekkei genkai user unable to be contained.

Kakashi smirks, truly happy for him.

He laughs at Kurenai’s stories, at Asuma’s jokes.

But his smile drops off his lips whenever they do not look.

 

And the red eyes watch him, and Asuma leans in, and hugs him, and Kakashi closes his eyes, the world swimming.

 

 

 

He stumbles down a path he knows too well when the moon sets, the fog of morning whispering through the streets. 

He knocks, loudly, not knowing what else to do, standing in front of the door, swaying.

 

It takes a moment, but the door opens, and Iruka stares at him, his mouth open in an aborted greeting. And then his gaze softens, and he pulls Kakashi in, pulling his stumbling form through the house and over to the big sofa. 

Kakashi falls onto it, and Iruka sighs, and then smiles, gently, starting to take off Kakashi’s shoes and vest, moving his unresponsive limbs as needed.

Kakashi blinks at him, watching Iruka wince as he pulls off the sodden mask, too. Kakashi’s voice is a whisper. “He’s gone.”

Iruka sniffs, and nods, his smile brittle. “I figured.” He chuckles, but it’s a sad one. “Wait, I’ll get a blanket.”

Kakashi’s hand flies out, catching his wrist, on instinct, the world spinning. “No… I…” I need more. He raises his other hand, staring at it for a moment. His tongue is thick in his mouth. “Kuchiyose no Jutsu.”

Puffs of smoke as his pack appears, on and around him.

Iruka stares, and then sighs, and settles next to him, one eyebrow quirked. Pakkun climbs into his lap, looking down at Kakashi for a moment, before sighing. “Iruka-san. Nice to see you. Thank you for having him here.”

Kakashi sighs, his eyelids drooping, and he lets himself relax, finally, to Iruka scratching Pakkun’s belly, while Shiba and Akino cuddle close, lending warmth.

 

Iruka’s voice sounds far away. “You will clean the couch tomorrow.”

Kakashi smiles, painfully, beautifully, while drifting off into sleep, breathing in their love. 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Tsunade sends him to Amegakure a week later. 

 

A week where drawing breath had been taxing. 

A week where his mind had been carefully empty. 

 

The letters in the book in front of his nose had made no sense. 

 

He had kept it in front of his face nonetheless. 

 

Iruka had been by, to talk. 

Kakashi had tried. 

 

 

He’s actually glad to leave. 

Glad that it’s a solo mission, too. 

 

The rain is fitting his mood. 

 

 

Amegakure is as non-inviting as always, the towers of the industrial complexes seeming to converge, fall down on the beholder. 

He had stopped at the inn on the way, had asked for Danzo‘s room. 

Had sat on the bed and tried to imagine where Danzo would go from here. 

 

He knows of Danzo‘s involvement of course, a few years back. Supposedly Danzo had helped Hanzo the Salamander defeat an insurrection, which had led to a brittle peace between Konohagakure and Amegakure. 

Kakashi frowns, remembering Jiraiya’s expression when he had told him he had spent time here. Where is the connection? What exactly did you do, back then? It must be… what. 15, 20 years ago? 25? Kakashi sighs, his gut telling him there is a connection indeed. And his eye… He sighs, shaking his head. There has been a kind of… increasing pressure in it. 

 

The scroll is heavy in his pocket, supposedly important but actually anything but, the only importance the possibility it brings. 

 

He gives his name at the check, lets them escort him to Hanzo. Watches the too small hand take the scroll through the gap in the screen. 

He activates the sharingan behind the hitai-ate, follows the vibrations of the paper butterflies to a tower in the east. 

He sighs, soundlessly. 

So. I guess Hanzo‘s dead. 

 

For some reason, he’s not surprised. 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

She reassembles, next to some kids, her jutsu seemingly fragile, and beautiful and tender. 

Kakashi wonders at the angel wings, frowning behind his mask. Are you seeing yourself as one? Or is it a tool, to guide the masses?

 

Her eyes light up when she talks to the children, genuine care in every quiet and yet stern word she says. 

She’s very beautiful, and regal, dressed in a black coat. 

A coat Kakashi has seen before, on Itachi. 

A coat adorned with red clouds, clouds as if the morning sun would light them, if rising after a storm. 

Akatsuki. 

 

He frowns, hoping Itachi isn’t near. 

But then she’s likely in his league, if Jiraiya‘s reports are to be trusted. 

 

And he’s here more or less officially. And easily recognizable too, even if he hadn’t given his real name. 

 

And if she’s Itachi’s level… she knows I’m here. 

He steps around the pillar he was standing behind, quietly, carefully keeping his stance relaxed. 

 

There’s a bit of a commotion as the children start and exclaim loudly, but she watches him just calmly, her expression thoroughly… neutral. 

Kakashi gives her a small eye-smile, bowing his head a bit. "Forgive me, I did not wish to interfere. I was just interested in the skills of your pupils.“

She inclines her head, accepting his apology without any sign of aggression. "Hatake Kakashi. You are welcome to watch their practice if you so wish.“

Kakashi inclines his head in thanks. "And you are…?“

A kid pipes up, almost outraged. "That is Konan-sama!“

Kakashi blinks and then bows again. "Forgive me.“ 

He looks up at the cold surfaces, the open but rainy sky, returning to her offer. "You practice here?“

She smiles, softly. "There is no room to waste in the dry interiors, not even for practice.“

Kakashi opens his mouth, but one of the smaller kids interjects, with a pout. "Yeah, it’s always raining now. Ever since…“

Several other kids shush the boy and Kakashi blinks, keeping his voice amiable. "Well, the weather is a tricky business.“ And a very difficult jutsu. 

She sighs, with a tilt of her head. "The sun will rise again, when pain has gone.“

Kakashi frowns, watching her turn away, spreading her wings once more. She calls back to him, over her shoulder. "You should return to Konohagakure, Hatake Kakashi. You are not… used to this weather.“ 

He quirks an eyebrow, recognizing the warning easily. I bet. "You seem to have adapted your jutsu to it quite successfully.“

She laughs at that, her amber eyes glowing for a moment. "Yes… someone taught me how to apply a toad‘s slick coating to the surface back then, when I lived with some… friends, east of here. My papers do not dissolve in water.“

She flaps her wings and rises, to the children‘s cries. 

 

He stares after her, frowning. A toad‘s slick costing, huh? What exactly was it that you did here, Jiraiya?

 

 

And why do I think I might need to find out who her friends were?

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He finds the little hut by chance, in the general direction an old farmer pointed him to, after he kept asking around for sightings of a white-haired man with toad relations some more years back. 

 

 

Kakashi enters the premises carefully, pushing through the high grass. There’s traps, but they’re old, and weathered, easy to disable. 

Inside is an almost empty room, with a trapdoor, and three little pieces of red wood hanging off the wall, half tumbled down off the beam they obviously were meant to stand on, held up by a thin wire only.

Kakashi steps up to them, his insides churning. 

His fingertips hover over the first for a long, long time, his instincts screaming, all his senses trained. 

He turns it around, revealing a painted frog‘s head - and a name underneath. Nagato. 

He swallows, lifting and turning the next. Yahiko. He reaches for the third. Konan. 

 

He drops his hand, closing his eyes. Yahiko. Wasn’t that the rebel that Danzo and Hanzo supposedly killed? His eyes open again, staring unseeing at the wall. 

Friend to Konan, trained by someone with white hair and toad summons. So the Akatsuki is what became of that rebel fraction. He blinks. You trained them, did you not? You gave them the skills to challenge the status quo. 

He looks down at the trapdoor, just knowing there is something in there. 

 

He opens it with little difficulty, the wood brittle. 

The space below is moldy, the escape tunnel collapsed. There is a small box in a corner. 

He forces it open, breaking the lock with a kunai. 

 

And stares down at three small and one big green jumpsuits, mistaking them for Guy‘s for a moment, but no, there’s heads and that doesn’t fit, that’s… 

There’s something in the corner, yellowed and wrinkled. 

Kakashi pulls the photo out, his fingers shaking. There you are. He stares at Jiraiya for long seconds, noting the young face, the lesser sage markings. The same grin. The obvious affection he felt for these kids he holds in a wide embrace for the camera. 

Kakashi blinks, looking at the children. 

There’s Konan, unmistakably, but with a slightly shier expression. 

There’s a boy with unruly orange hair, and Kakashi frowns, vaguely remembering reading of similar hair in Danzo‘s report. 

And then there’s another boy, with long red hair, obviously Uzumaki descendant. But his eyes… Kakashi stares, the photograph still carrying a trace of the once vibrant purple the eyes must have been then. What is that? Something tickles at the back of his mind, a memory, but he cannot pin it down, something… and then it drops, with the weight of the world. 

Kurenai‘s memory rises, her words echoing in his mind. ‘Madara’s weird purple eyes, that he was supposed to have developed, and that supposedly could do anything.‘

Kakashi closes his eyes, a lead weight in his stomach. Jiraiya, why didn’t you tell me of them? What happened here? He looks back down at the boy with the weird eyes. Who are you? And… what can those eyes do?

 

The photo stays silent, of course, while the rain continues to pour. 

 

He puts the frog suits back, and leaves, the photo safely tucked away. 

 

Expecting paper butterflies to show up and cut him to pieces on every step he takes, only able to breathe properly when he reaches the border. 

 

 

He grimaces, the muscles in his jaw jumping. 

Jiraiya-san. I‘m sorry. I think I need to track you down. 

 

His heart skips a beat at the thought who else is there. 

 

 

He frowns, wondering if Tsunade will allow him the shortcut to the toads through the pond. 

His hand clenches on the photo. 

I bet she will. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Tsunade stares down at the photo, her eyes huge. Her voice is a whisper. "The rinnegan. I never thought I‘d see it.“

Kakashi swallows. "You know it?“

She shakes her head. "I know of it. Grandfather told me of it…“ She blinks, looking up at him. "I have never heard of anyone besides Madara to develop it.“

Kakashi grimaces. “Madara developed it?“ And only Madara? Oh no. 

She sighs, with a nod. "It’s a sharingan form. Maybe the final form.“

Kakashi sighs, too. Of course. Lucky me.

He swallows. “What can it do?”

She shrugs, still staring at the photo. “I do not know. Supposedly it was what Madara used to appear in places… but I bet there’s more to it.” She carefully puts the photo down. For a moment, her fingers hover over Jiraiya’s face. Gently. The little motion tugs at something, deep within Kakashi.

She clears her throat. “I remember that time. We had battled Hanzo. He gave us our title, called us Sannin. It stuck, as you know.” She smirks for a moment, her eyes faraway, remembering. “We met these kids on the road, and for some reason…” She trails off, shaking her head. “Jiraiya stayed with them. I did not understand then.” She smirks, and shrugs. “I guess he thought that he maybe one of them would be the child of prophecy. I… didn’t give them much attention I have to admit, I didn’t notice the eyes then, I just wanted to return home.”

Kakashi frowns. “But… He… told me he thought that the child of prophecy was Minato?”

She nods. “Yes, but this was before he became Minato’s Sensei.” She hesitates. “And I think he’s changed his opinion on that…”

Kakashi looks out of the window for a moment, silent. I know.

 

She sighs, rubbing her forehead. “You need to go and check with Jiraiya. Ask him about the boy with the purple eyes.” She frowns. “I… I didn’t realize then, but the boy shouldn’t have the rinnegan since he’s no Uchiha.”

Kakashi raises his eyebrow, silently. 

She shoots him a look. “Good point. Still.” She blows out some air. “I’ll call a toad to pick you up. But I want you to stay away from Naruto. Talk to Jiraiya only.”

He swallows, his mouth suddenly dry. “Why?”

She sighs, and then smiles at him, gently. “Because you wouldn’t be able to leave I think.”

Kakashi looks away, grimacing. Not daring to analyze his own feelings.

She clears her throat, and then taps her desk, once. “Alright. Why don’t you freshen up, and be at the front gate in an hour. I’ll call the toad.”

He inclines his head, and vanishes.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He watches, from afar, as Naruto hops through ponds. Splashing the water around wildly.

Enjoying the hell out of it all, playing around with the smaller toads that hop around him.

 

Kakashi chuckles, and wipes at a tear, his feelings a confused mess.

Jiraiya sighs behind him, tone wistful. “He’s feeling right at home here.” He chuckles. “Which is driving Fukasaku mad because he’s not staying put for one second.”

Kakashi sniffs, unable to answer. 

Jiraiya places a grounding hand on his shoulder. “Why are you here, Kakashi?”

Kakashi clears his throat, his voice raw. He doesn’t take his gaze off Naruto. “I met Konan.”

Jiraiya’s hand tightens, turns him, just a bit. “You met Konan.”

Kakashi nods, eyes sideways on Naruto now. “Yes. She’s a member of the Akatsuki.” He flicks his eyes to Jiraiya for a moment, before returning to the blond boy who is laughing loudly. “Someone has killed Hanzo and is controlling the weather in Amegakure, likely to know who is moving within its limits.” He sniffs, and closes his eyes, finally turning from Naruto with by sheer will, turning to face Jiraiya. “I… followed your steps, back then. I found the hut. And a photo.”

Jiraiya stares at him, for a long moment. Something gentle flickers over his face, there and gone again. “You found out about them. And Nagato’s eyes.”

Kakashi nods. “Tsunade says this must be the rinnegan.”

Jiraiya sighs, rubbing his temple. “I think he’s the leader of the Akatsuki.”

Kakashi frowns, noting the change of subject, but letting it slip, for now. And you feel guilty because of what they’re doing, now. He keeps his tone soft, though he is vibrating with the need to know. “You taught them.”

Jiraiya nods, voice raw. “I did. I…” He sighs, suddenly seeming very old. “I should have stayed with them, back then. But I…” He frowns, looking over at Naruto for a moment. “But even then something pulled me back. And so I only stayed long enough to make sure they would be able to survive.” He shrugs. “Close to a year, or so.”

Kakashi frowns, wondering out loud. “A weird decision, still, especially for a freshly designated Sannin.”

Jiraiya barks a laugh. “Ah yes, Tsunade did look at me funnily indeed, and Orochimaru…” He waves off, grimacing. “Still. It was the right thing to do, then.”

Kakashi blinks. “You thought they were the ones to change the ninja world.”

Jiraiya sighs, shaking his head, once. “I thought Nagato might be, yes. The power he had…”

Kakashi prompts, softly, carefully. “What powers.”

Jiraiya is silent for a long moment, his voice low when he finally speaks. “I only saw a small part of them I think. He has the power to repel, and to destroy, by will. He was able to manipulate the weather.” He shares a look with Kakashi, before continuing. “He sometimes revived small animals. And… As an Uzumaki he was also very resilient, a fact that actually only enabled him to use these eyes I think… they seemed very taxing, and always active.” Jiraiya grimaces. “Draining him, viciously.”

Kakashi grimaces as well, imagining. He swallows. “If he is an Uzumaki, where did he get them from?”

Jiraiya cackles. “He told me he got them from someone when he was a child.”

Kakashi blinks. “Someone gave them to him, freely?”

Jiraiya sighs, deeply. “Someone with long black hair, and black eyes that could shift to red, yes.”

Kakashi shares another look with him. “I… see.” Someone who had spare sharingans. He swallows. “Has there ever been someone else said to have this form?” Besides Madara, he doesn’t spell out. 

Jiraiya shakes his head. “No.”

Kakashi frowns, hearing Naruto laugh again, loudly. Dammit. He licks his lips. “If you knew he was that powerful and that he got the eyes from… someone, why…”

Jiraiya sighs, deeply. “Why did I leave them?”

Kakashi nods. 

Jiraiya looks away for a long moment. When he speaks his voice openly carries his pain, and it tears at Kakashi. “Tsunade and Dan had not yet bonded. Had not done their tattoos yet. I still had…” He trails off.

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment. And you wanted to be close to her.

Over to the side, Naruto giggles at something, and then there’s a big splash, as he obviously throws himself into another pond.

Jiraiya’s voice sounds faraway. “Hope makes fools of us all.”

Kakashi swallows.

 

They are silent for a long moment, the wind picking up, playing with their hair. 

Kakashi exhales, quietly. “You said he was able to revive.”

Jiraiya nods, inhaling deeply. “A truly spooky experience.”

Kakashi frowns, lowering his voice even more. “Yahiko was supposedly killed by Hanzo and Danzo, a few years back.”

Jiraiya swallows. He drops his voice to a whisper. “It would have destroyed Nagato.” He clicks his tongue. “He was very attached to them both, relying on them emotionally.”

Kakashi bites his lips. “Enough to make him want to…” What. What IS he doing with the bijous?

Jiraiya shrugs. “I do not know.” He sighs, locking their gazes. “If we are right, and it is Nagato who is leading the Akatsuki, and if he maybe revived Yahiko…” He raises his eyebrows. “Then I have my work cut out for me to get Naruto ready for them.” He snorts. “And then I will have to go to Amegakure at some point, to check.” And to try to stop them, he doesn’t say. He shakes his head, once, looking over at Naruto. “It’s my responsibility.”

Kakashi is silent, watching him.

Jiraiya shoots him a look. “First, Naruto though. And then we’ll see.”

Kakashi frowns. “You think we have the time?”

Jiraiya weighs his head. “You’re here, are you not?” He tilts his head, his eyes dark on Kakashi’s. “If they were ready to make their move you would be dead.”

Kakashi shivers, the flat assessment a sobering one. 

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow. “Go and train with Sora.” He sighs through his nose. “Please.”

You need to become stronger, too, hangs in the air, unsaid.

 

Kakashi swallows, his guts churning.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He returns to Konoha, only to find Guy waiting for him in front of the gates, doing one-finger push-ups.

 

Kakashi hops off the toad, watches it disappear in a puff of smoke, and then turns to Guy, watching him for a moment. He keeps his voice soft, still vaguely unsettled from his discussion with Jiraiya and not in the mood for much levity, but also yearning for some companionship, the void in him calling. “So, ever done this with people on the back?”

Guy’s head snaps up, his dark brows rising. “Ahhh, Kakashi, my eternal rival, a challenge?” He smiles, widely, eyes sparkling, and Kakashi echoes it with a smirk. Guy raises his eye to the heavens, exclaiming loudly, full of soul. “Whatever challenge you may pass to me, I will master it, for my sake and Lee’s.”

Kakashi nods, lips pursed. Uh huh. We’ll see.

He walks over, and then seats himself on Guy’s back, with a little sigh. Guy freezes for just a moment. Kakashi smirks to himself, but keeps his tone flat. “Half an hour one-finger push-ups, with me perched on your back.” He sniffs, dramatically. “Unfortunately Sakura isn’t here, so we cannot emulate what I did with her and the trader in the Land of Waves correctly, but…”

Guy harrumphs, starting to rise and fall with him in rhythm. “Ahhhh, I will simply do half an hour more, my rival. That should suffice to beat your meager challenge, shouldn’t it?!”

Kakashi grins to himself, and then crosses his legs, puts his elbow on the knee and his head into his palm. “Mhhh hmmmm.” Thank you for humoring me.

 

They are silent for a long moment, Guy breathing calmly while going through the motions. Kakashi watches the world shift up and down, feeling the amused glances of the two guards, Kotetsu and Izumo. Kakashi sends them an eye-smile, knowing the ongoing rivalry between him and Guy is the subject of a lot of talk - and bets. He sighs softly. They should give us a percentage of their wins. He snickers.

Guy hums, in question. 

Kakashi shrugs. “I was just thinking about the fact that people are keeping track of our… rivalry.”

Guy grins, his nose almost touching the ground. “As they should, as our feats change the very world we live in.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, his tone soft. “Do they?”

Guy pauses, for a split second, before resuming the push-ups. When he speaks again, his tone is a bit softer, not quite as exuberant. But still flamboyant. ”Through our rivalry we push ourselves, through our friendship we become stronger. The energy and powers of our youth are prolonged and sharpened, and we rise to be eternal flames of hope for the next generation.”

The next generation. Kakashi blinks, remembering Kabuto’s attack and his realization then, and sighs. Keeps his voice low. “I feel so old though, sometimes. I mean…” He feels Guy listen, intently, while continuing the push-ups. Kakashi shakes his head. “Guy I’m 27, so are you. We’ve been through so much, already, and for ninjas we’re… old.” He frowns, trying to put it into words. “I see the next generation, and their skills, and…” 

I see Naruto grow, and life racing by. 

And now I won’t even be able to see him.

He swallows, harshly.

 

Guy’s voice is low, totally void of humor and exuberance, for a moment. “And that is why we train and push ourselves, is it not?”

Kakashi shrugs, a bit listlessly. “I guess.” He frowns, and then snorts. “This weapon I wear… so much of my time is spent in bed, trying to recuperate.”

He sighs. 

Tsunade and Jiraiya are right. 

I really have to stop that. Find a way to train it.

He sighs again, through his nose, staring unseeing at the trees. “I will leave in a little while. For a while.”

Guy halts, midway through pushing up. “You will leave?”

Kakashi nods, clearing his throat. “Yes, I need to… train in a different way.”

Guy’s voice is soft. “I understand.”

Kakashi’s throat clicks as he speaks, feeling the words deep in his gut. “I’m sorry.”

Guy resumes his motions. “How long will you be gone?”

Kakashi inhales, deeply. “I’m not sure.”

Guy hums. “When?”

Kakashi shrugs again. “Probably after the Godaime has sent us revenging the Sandaime.”

 

"Ah.“ Guy hesitates. "Have you not heard?“

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. "Heard?“

Guy hums. "I believe you know that Jiraiya-sama was in Sunagakure the other day, when you were in Amegakure?“

Kakashi exhales softly, and then prompts. “What happened?”

Guy looks up at him, from the corner of his eyes. “In exchange for the Godaime not pressing for… let’s say reparations, Sunagakure has offered a very generous peace and trade treaty.”

Kakashi frowns, and then blinks. Remembering Gaara came to their aid, too. And his siblings. Who are the late Kazekage’s children. “I… see.” He clicks his tongue, remembering Jiraiya’s words. The children are the future. He closes his eyes for a long moment. And then exhales, deeply. “I’m glad.”

Guy nods, silently. His voice is very low. “I know others have tracked the traitors that helped down, and are tracking Orochimaru and his helpers, but the Godaime is very careful not to bring too much blood to our doorstep right now.”

Kakashi raises his eyes to the sky. “I guess I can go then.”

Guy hums, lowering himself once more. “After I’ve beaten you at this challenge, my rival, yes.”

 

Kakashi grins.

 

 

 

 

________________________

Notes:

EDIT (Sept. 4th, 2022): I added a fanart by the lovely @anannua into the end here, because I adore Jiraiya's and Naruto's dynamic on their trips... For all of Jiraiya's faults, he made Naruto feel very loved. And I just know he took him piggypacking for fun :)))

Chapter 22: Whispers, in the dark

Notes:

God knows where that first scene came from, but they… just do what they want. *sheesh*
*snickers* (Also, seriously, who can blame Kurenai. *whistles innocently*)

And: long, long chapter, over 12k. But I felt it would work best in one go. I have adapted the summary in the first chapter, bc I now know at which point a bigger break to canon will happen - after the kage conference. I’ll note why then there.

There is also an art in here, by the beautiful Anannua (original post here). Just… look at how cute it is, at the postures and expressions. I adore it. 🥰🥰🥰

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

He drops by the Hyuuga complex after saying good-bye to Iruka, something that had been bittersweet. Not as bad as expected, but still fraught with the knowledge that he will miss him. Deeply.

He smirks softly, looking at the dark-haired kunoichi standing against the tree in the training area, the man next to her laying lazily on the ground in the sun, sending little tendrils of smoke up into the sky.

I will miss them all.

 

He steps closer silently, watching Hinata and Neji spar. 

Nods at the jonins, his voice low. “Their level of aggression has gone down?”

Kurenai nods, keeping her gaze on the two and her voice low. “It has. Removing Hiashi and confining him to one of his weekend cottages has removed a lot of pressure.”

Kakashi hums. “Despite the fact that his pardon comes with such a…” Shame? He frowns, searching for another word. 

Asuma’s voice chimes up, rumbling. “Burden?”

Kakashi nods, shooting him a look. 

Asuma shrugs. “Some people thrive under pressure, others die.” He smirks up at Kurenai, who echoes the smile, unseeing. “Hinata thrives without it.”

Kakashi hums, looking back at her. Watches her keep up with Neji. Indeed.

He clears his throat. “I wanted to tell you that I will be gone for a while. I will go and train with Sora-san.”

Kurenai blinks at him, her red eyes locked to his for a long moment. “Training your eye?”

Kakashi smirks, and nods. “Among other things.”

Asuma hums. “Shame.”

Kakashi frowns down at him. “Shame?”

Asuma flicks his cigarette, with a sharp smile. “We’ll miss you.”

Kakashi blushes, just slightly. 

Kurenai grins, softly. Her voice drops to be almost inaudible. “He’s desired you for a long while, you know.”

Kakashi stares at her, and then clears his throat, willing the instant burning of his ears to stop. “I… You… know?”

She grins at him, her eyes sparkling. “We’ve talked about it.”

Kakashi stares at her, and then down at Asuma, who grins up at him, and then blinks again, looking at her a bit wildly. “Really.”

She rolls her eyes at him, while blushing a bit as well. “Kakashi, you’re hot. Get used to it.” She clears her throat, reaching up to twirl her hair. “Imagining some things is… hot, too.”

He blinks, his mind a flatline. “Huh.”

Asuma chuckles. And then clicks his tongue. “Think about that while you’re away, hmmm?” He takes a drag of his cigarette. “You can come by, after?”

Kakashi’s mouth drops open. 

Neji yells, and then curses, loudly, shattering their little bubble.

Kakashi exhales, shudderingly. His throat clicks. “See you then, I… guess.”

Kurenai smirks at him. “Please.”

Asuma chuckles. 

 

Kakashi wheezes a bit, and turns away, shaking his head to clear it.

 

Hinata’s voice rings out to him. “Sensei Kakashi!”

He turns to her, tilts his head, deciding to use the title. She’s the head of the clan now, isn’t she… “Hinata-sama.”

Her voice is breathless, her cheeks reddened from exertion and vague mortification, the lilac eyes huge. “Will Naruto come back?”

He better. Kakashi smiles, very softly, carefully giving her an eye-smile. “I promise.”

Her eyes flit away for a moment, over to Hanabi, who is sitting on the porch. Hinata’s voice drops to a whisper. “Thank you for saving my father. It is still not easy, with him away, but I can take Hanabi to visit and…”

Kakashi blinks, and then puts a hand on her shoulder, squeezing softly. “Hinata-sama, I…” He hesitates, and then lets his sincerity color his voice. “I am also very glad.”

She nods once, and then sniffs. “Please call me Hinata though, Sensei.”

He chuckles. “Alright.”

 

He gives her shoulder a last squeeze and straightens up, and then jumps.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He calls his pack for the way, not for protection, but for fun.

They make a race of it, the trees flying by. 

For the first time in a long while Kakashi truly laughs out loud when Pakkun falls off Bulls head on a jump.

The little dog shoots him a skunk eye but Kakashi can see him smirk from the corner of his eyes, and he is grateful, so grateful.

 

 

Hachō-mura sits in a little valley at the edge of the Fire’s territory, encased by the woods and a waterfall. 

 

He stares down into it, noting the few dozen houses, and the small river. The lake it is settled around.

He reaches out to pet Shiba, who is pushing against his legs. He clears his throat. “Guess I’m here.” He looks down at his pack, smiles at them. “Thank you for accompanying me.”

Pakkun yawns, loudly, shifting on Bull’s head. “Want us to check on Naruto?”

Kakashi blinks, and then shakes his head. “No. Thank you, but no.” He looks up at the sky. “I know he’s safe, or as safe as he’s gonna be. Everything else…”

Everything else will be as it will be. 

He snorts softly to himself. Look at me, trusting in fate.

He inhales deeply, and then claps his hands. “Alright. Off you go then. Have fun. I‘ll call you from time to time.”

Pakkun snickers. “You too.”

 

A puff of smoke and Kakashi is alone, staring down into the valley once more. 

And then he turns his feet to the small cottage off to the side by the waterfall, just knowing that that is where Sora is. 

It’s where I would have put it, too.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Her house is homely, and cute and yet open, held in the cream colors she prefers to wear, too.

She had shown him to his room, totally unfazed by his sudden appearance, a smirk on her face. 

 

There is a small orange pillow on his futon, and he stares at it, vaguely amused and mightily touched, knowing she has put it there, for him.

He swallows, and then unpacks his backpack, the few items he took along.

His books, some clothes, his toiletries. 

His father’s tanto.  

The hiraishin kunai.

The pebble he got from and with Naruto, so long ago. Kakashi stares at it for a moment, remembering when the pebbles had fallen from Naruto’s little fist, the boy a toddler still, then. Remembers bending down and picking them back up, the way Naruto’s eyes had lit up when he’d given them to him. Remembers how he had put the pebble Naruto had gifted to him carefully away, there, behind his beloved books in the shelf.

A tangible reminder of the complicated past. 

Kakashi blinks and puts it onto the small table next to the window, next to the sword.

And then he carefully, very carefully, takes out the last wrapped item, hissing in annoyance when one of the leaves is bent, carefully stroking it and checking the soil. 

He sighs, and puts Mr. Ukki next to the pebble, staring at his meager possessions on the table for a long moment. 

The things I value the most. And they’re all connected.

 

Minato’s gift. Jiraiya’s books, which he started writing after he left the village, for the same reason my father wasn’t able to fight his darkness anymore. Jiraiya, who was Minato’s teacher and who is now off to train Naruto, who in turn gave me something living and something shiny.

 

Kakashi blinks, smirking softly. 

As I did.

 

Naruto’s voice pipes up, in his memory. ‘Silver, like your hair’.

 

He closes his eyes, for a long moment, and then turns to the door, letting Mr. Ukki stretch its leaves to the sun.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He looks at the photos on the shelf, silently, while she prepares dinner, after having declined his offer to help. 

There’s photos of her and her relatives, and even a family photo of her and a very small and cute Tsunade, with Sora standing off to the side, the very picture of a suffering teenager, putting up with the idiotic adults. Kakashi chuckles softly at how Tsunade is pulling at a man’s dark hair in the photo, and then he frowns, calling back to Sora.

“Is that… Hashirama-sama?”

Sora shakes her head, with a sigh. “No, that is my father. They looked quite alike though, because of the similar hair style. Unfortunately, Hashirama had been dead at the time of the photo already.”

They are both silent for a moment, and Sora dims the flames on the hearth to let the stew sizzle, and comes over, wiping her hands on a cloth. “That was around the time when Tobirama-san was Hokage. A while after Madara… left. And their fight.” She inhales, deeply. „Madara always had this vain streak, emotionally and in regards to his looks. He especially liked his hair.“ She smirks. „And Hashirama’s long hair, if rumors were to be trusted.“

Kakashi blinks, remembering how Kurenai had wondered about the way that people spoke about them. “I sometimes forget that there are living relatives to these… legends.”

Sora snorts. “Well, Tsunade was 5 when Hashirama died. I was… 13.” She snorts, indicating the photo. “As you can see.” She hums for a moment. “Hashirama idolized Tsunade, he loved her so much.” She snorts again. “He took her to the gambling tables with him, even at that age, that’s where she has her bad habits from.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, trying to align this with the image of Konoha’s founding father. “I…”

Sora smirks at him. “Throws you for a loop, doesn’t it?” She grins. “Hashirama was quite irreverent, goofy even, actually. The total opposite of Madara.” She snickers. “I only saw them together once, when I was like… I don’t know… 8? 9? At a celebration. Madara… had this weird love-hate relationship to and with Hashirama. He could not live with him and not without him, and I know it was the same for Hashirama. Uzumaki Mito, Hashirama’s wife, she often rolled her eyes at them, and threw them out of the house, regularly. Even that evening. No-one batted an eye.” She laughs. “I’m not sure if they were, like, you know, lovers, but there was energy, indeed.”

She sobers, slowly. “Unfortunately, that energy turned into animosity at some point.”

Kakashi frowns, looking at her. “What do you think was the reason?”

Sora frowns as well, her eyes unseeing for a moment. “I’m not sure. Probably a million smaller things. The day-to-day difficulties that have a habit of wearing us down.” She inhales deeply, and then sighs. “Making a village work isn’t easy. The various clans all had their own understanding of what should be, and Hashirama had to make a lot of compromises. Some of those were not to Madara’s liking.” She shakes her head. “And at some point they clashed…”

She shrugs. “Two very powerful men, with emotional too powerful ties, if you ask me.”

Kakashi frowns, looking away for a moment. He speaks the words without much thought. “Like Yin and Yang.” He blinks, remembering Naruto and Sasuke in the valley of the end.  Like the two of you.

Sora sighs, and then nods. “Yes.”

 

Sora looks out of the window for a moment. “I remember my father groaning when Tobirama took over. We were… mourning Hashirama, of course, but we also knew that Tobirama had his own stance in regards to Madara’s clan, and… that he blamed them to an extent for Madara’s attack. I mean, they had separated from Madara, but they were still Uchiha.”

Kakashi sighs, deeply. “And here we are, with the Uchiha gone, and still we try to train the sharingan.” His mind dwells on purple eyes for a moment, but he decides against mentioning them.

Sora snorts gently. “Indeed.”

 

Kakashi reaches out to touch the frame of a photo for a moment. His tone is soft. “You… don’t have pictures of them here?”

He doesn’t specify who ‘they’ are, knowing she understands.

Sora sighs softly, through her nose. “No, I have them in a special album.” She smirks softly, but there is pain in her voice. “We can look at them after dinner.”

Kakashi nods, once, knowing it is hard for her, but wanting to see nonetheless, something in him needing. “I would love to.”

She nods, and turns back to the kitchen. “Alright.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The air is cool, and the moon is high and full, and Sora tilts her head towards the porch after their simple but good dinner, settling on the steps with a big photo book. 

Kakashi settles next to her, vague excitement fluttering in his stomach.

 

For a moment, they both just stare down onto the photo album. 

Kakashi’s throat clicks as he speaks. “I… I remember them, how they were. When they were grown up. But I…” He swallows. “Jiraiya said that Minato was irreverent at times, mischievous even, when he was younger, and I… “ He chuckles, and shrugs. “I cannot really align that with my memory of him.”

Sora’s eyes crinkle. “Well, he tried to be a good, responsible Sensei, I’m sure.” She grins. “But he was also a boy, with lots of skills and the need to try these skills...” 

Kakashi blinks at her, and then grins. “Right. I…” He frowns. “He was only 10 years older than me, I…” He shakes his head. “I guess I never thought about how different his childhood must have been.”

She tilts her head. “Different?”

He shrugs. “To mine.”

“Ah.” She nods, once, her finger tracing the webbing on the book’s surface. “Yes, and no.” She exhales softly. “Minato’s parents were no ninjas, he was an outlier. As such, he rarely spent time with them, after the academy. I know that they were even estranged, to a certain extent. They could never understand why their son would choose life as a shinobi, and the dangers that came with it, voluntarily.”

Kakashi frowns, thinking about Sakura and the way her parents had looked at him when he had sent her home with bruises again and again. “I guess… I can understand that.” It’s even hard for me when they get hurt. For them it must be… terrible. And we’re not even at war. 

He frowns. “Are they still alive?”

Sora sighs. “No. They started coughing shortly before Minato became Hokage, and then… died by presumed consumption shortly after.”

Kakashi stares at her, with what he knows is wide eyes. Coughing?

She quirks an eyebrow at him, her tone flat. “I know what you’re thinking now. Nothing could ever be proven.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, and then looks away, his stomach churning. Huh.

 

Sora clears her throat, nods, and then shrugs. “Minato wouldn’t take any no from his parents, and he stayed on his path, wanting to be a shinobi. Their death made him a bit more serious, but mostly he just stayed focused. But that was later. He was still very young when Kushina entered his class.” She smirks at Kakashi. “And… that was that.”

He quirks an eyebrow. “Just like that?”

She laughs and then sobers. “No. I know Kushina had a hard time finding her place, being sent there as the next jinchuriki for the leaf after all, her own parents sending her away from Uzushio.” She frowns. “Mito-san took her in, and taught her, but I know that it took years for her to come to terms with it all.” She clicks her tongue. “When Minato rescued her years later something clicked into place for them. They both did the tattoos the same night, the same you have, and they watched it darken.” 

Kakashi looks up at the moon, his tone wistful. “They knew right away.”

Sora snorts. “You know, I was very relieved.” She grins. “There always was this pull between them. And she would go onto missions with me, lamenting loudly about that boy who is so annoying, and who is always praised so much by all the others.” She snickers, making quote signs in the air. “’Minato is sooooo perfect. Minato is sooooo smart.’” She snickers again, shooting him a look. “And then she’d snort and mumble ‘wimp’.”

 

 

ART by the wonderful Anannua

 

 

Kakashi stares at her, a bit wildly. “Okay….”

Sora snickers, opening the book. “Here, let me show you.” She leafs through the book, opening a certain page. Pointing, with a grin. “Here, that’s them right after the academy. Before we took our respective genins out for the first time.”

Kakashi leans forward a bit, eyes riveted to the group photo of little 12-year-olds, milling in front of the academy doors.

Sora points her finger. “There’s Kushina, right in front, glowering at the camera. They used to call her ’tomato’ because of her face-shape and hair, and she hated it.” Her finger shifts. “And there’s Minato, right behind her.” Her grin turns wistful. “Looking at her.”

Kakashi reaches out, hovers his own finger over the photo for a moment. “They are so young.” He blinks, his tone breathless, as a belated awareness reaches him. “He looks just like him.” Sans the whiskers. But that same hair, that same face shape… the same eyes. Though the shape of them is hers.

Sora hums, and nods. “I know.”

Kakashi swallows, his throat clicking. “I…” He cannot think. Or breathe.

Sora sighs softly, her voice carrying humor. “A part of me had hoped for Naruto to be a red-head, too, but I’ll make do with his predilection for orange.”

Kakashi shivers. 

Sora looks at him, and then turns a page. “Here. Here’s Jiraiya with his team.”

Kakashi blinks, staring down at the photo, the exuberant grin framed in white he knows so well, and the soft smile on the face of the young blond boy he also knows so well, too, the blue eyes staring right into his soul.

He sniffs, wiping at his eyes, feeling flayed open suddenly, unable to keep his emotions in check. 

Sora leans into him for a moment, lending strength, and then turns the page again, and Kakashi gasps, sniffing again. 

Her voice is very gentle, drenched in memories. “And here’s mine.”

Kakashi blinks the tears away, looking down at Kushina’s grinning face, the eyes wide and sparkling, and carrying all the hope and exuberance of the world. He cannot see who else is on the photo, his eyes riveted to her eyes, and the expression in them.

Sora looks up at him, and then nods. “Yes. Naruto has his expressions from her.” She chuckles softly. “But thankfully the temper was mellowed a bit by Minato’s traits, too.”

Kakashi snorts, and then snickers, helplessly. He shakes his head. “Still lots of temperament left.”

Sora chuckles with him. “Oh yes.”

 

Her fingers hover over the photo for a moment. “I was so young. So naive.” 

Kakashi swallows, sobering with her. “We all were. Are.”

Sora hums. “Yes, and thankfully so, I guess. Because otherwise none of us would think we could change the world.”

Kakashi snorts, and then picks at a non-existent fluff on his pants. “You may be right.”

Sora smirks softly, and then taps the page, once. “More photos?”

Kakashi nods, immediately, sniffing again. “Please.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Night gives way to the day when he finally falls into sleep, his mind and soul filled to the brim with memories, old and new, enhanced and enriched by stories and images, and little pieces of life, filling out the mosaic of the memory of them.

 

Kakashi turns his face into the orange pillow, and falls asleep, feeling utterly at peace.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“So. How much time do we have to train your eye?”

 

Kakashi shrugs, walking through the forest with her, collecting mushrooms. “Tsunade has sent me to you with her blessing. Telling me to master it. I… guess that means I have the time I need?”

Sora hums, bending down to pick up a bunch of chanterelles. “When will he be back?”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows. “I do not know. Jiraiya said something about two to three years.”

Sora nods, with a little sigh. “Well. We have time then. I don’t think someone as clever as you will need two years, right?”

Kakashi snorts. “Well, since I am so clever I haven’t managed yet, since…” He trails off, frowning, the echo of the word shivering through him.

Sora hums, prompting softly. “Since?”

Kakashi clears his throat. “Rin. Since… Rin.”

Sora looks up at him. “Rin?”

Right. Kakashi swallows. “Nohara Rin. She was in team 7 with me, when we were Minato’s pupils.” He frowns. “I’m surprised you didn’t meet her?” He blinks. “I mean, we met, right?”

Sora shrugs. “Yes, but you were already under Minato’s tutelage then. And I…” She grimaces. “With everything going on in Konoha I just wanted to leave, not meet new people.” She clears her throat. “I’m sorry. So. That Rin. She marks a special event somehow?”

Kakashi barks a laugh, watching her pick up some white mushrooms. “I…” He shakes his head. “How much of my story do you know?”

She quirks an eyebrow, shooting him a look. “I know the eye was a gift.” 

He nods. “Anything else?”

She frowns, and then sighs. “Why don’t you put it into your own words.”

He swallows, looking away for a long moment. “Rin was… the heart of our team. Obito loved her. I knew that. I know, it sounds stupid, given the fact that we were so young, but…” He smiles, painfully. “It’s still true. I’m not sure if she returned his feelings, at least like that, but…” He shrugs. “I remember her standing with Minato off to the side quite often, whenever Obito and I squabbled.” He laughs suddenly, remembering. “I was too stupid back then to realize they were discussing us, but I remember they laughed with each other.” He smirks, looking up at the sky, his voice dropping to a whisper. “It’s good to remember that she laughed with him.”

He swallows again, closing his eyes for a moment. “Obito was an Uchiha. He had yet to awaken his sharingan, and he was a pest in regards to his eyes, he drove me mad.” Kakashi snorts. “Of course, I was an obnoxious ass as well, but…” He shakes his head. “Minato assigned us to a mission in enemy territory. Telling us that we had to fare for ourselves.” He hesitates, sighing deeply. “Back then, I didn’t think about it too much, but I… have since looked into the reports and I…” His voice drops to a whisper. “I know Minato sent us onto the supposedly easier mission, since his mission was to assassinate a whole squad.” Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, licking his lips. “And he wanted to spare us that experience.”

 

They are silent for a moment, watching the sunlight filter through the trees. 

Eventually, Kakashi continues. “Of course we were no strangers to killing by then. And the mission turned out to be a disaster. Rin got kidnapped. My eye got cut. Obito awakened his sharingan and then the second tomoe…” Like Sasuke. And it was a mission to protect a bridge, too. Kakashi grimaces, forcing himself to continue. “And when we extracted Rin Obito got buried under rocks…. And…”

Sora exhales, finishing the sentence. “And he gave you his sharingan.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. “He asked Rin to do the operation. Insisting I took the eye right then. Making her connect it to my brain, right then.” He grimaces, his voice a harsh whisper. “It… hurt. Both of us, no matter Rin’s skill. Rin threw up when we were outside again. For a long while, she couldn’t stand looking at me.”

And we left you there, thinking you’d died.

 

He raises his eyes, to the sun. Activates the sharingan behind his hitai-ate for a moment, needing the burn of the glare. “I was able to refine chidori with this gift he gave me. Because of my skill with it Minato took me into his Anbu. Likely to keep me close, too. Everything… was pitch black then.”

Sora hums. “You missed him more than you could admit.”

Kakashi swallows, his jaw working. “I…” I still do. The world blurs, as a tear drops.

Sora stops, her hands holding the little basket with the mushrooms to her stomach. “Show me your sharingan.”

Kakashi pushes the hitai-ate up, wordlessly. 

Sora quirks an eyebrow. “Three tomoe.”

Kakashi nods, with a sigh. “Two years later, Rin was abducted again. This time, they managed to put the three-tails into her, wanting to use her as some kind of jinchuriki-bomb.” He snorts, devoid of any humor. “Minato was away, I was sent to retrieve her, we were surrounded, I began killing our enemies with chidori and…”

Sora blinks, finishing his sentence, guessing correctly. “And she killed herself on it.”

Warmth and scratches of bones, and pulsing flesh, around his hand. “Yes.”

She frowns, shaking her head. “And you developed the third tomoe?”

Kakashi blinks, and then shakes his head, and then shrugs. “I do not know. There was this…” He grimaces, trying to explain. “This pressure, this feeling, and then this word, echoing in my brain, like whispers in the dark…”

She looks up at him. “What word.”

He sighs, remembering the feeling coming with it. “Kamui.”

Sora stares at him. “Kamui?”

He’s feeling old suddenly, old and tired. “You know it, too?” 

Her tone is vaguely off. “I do. Who else?”

He quirks an eyebrow. “Tsunade seemed to remember it.”

“Mhhh.” Sora stares at him, and at his eye, for a long moment. “What does she remember that the Uchiha did with this word?”

Kakashi swallows, his throat clicking. His words are almost inaudible. “Disappear on battle fields.” He frowns, closing his eyes for a long moment. “When I had my encounter with Itachi, I saw the tomoe in his eyes change into wheels, and then turn.” He reopens his eyes, shooting her a look. “That was right before he trapped me in his genjutsu.”

She quirks an eyebrow. “I… see.” She frowns looking away. “I remember the turning wheels in the sharingan eyes. It happens for the Mangekyo ones, when the special abilities are used.”

Kakashi swallows, his tone gravelly. “Tsunade said something similar. Apparently the Mangekyo is a very special state…”

Sora snorts. “Yes, and we know why, too, don’t we.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, listening to the sound of the wind in the trees, his mind filled with the glee in Danzo’s voice when he told him. “Yes. You have to betray a friend to get one.”

Sora clicks her tongue. “So they say…”

 

She turns and starts walking back to the edge of the forest, into the general direction of her house. Throwing the words back over her shoulder. “Which begs the question why you have it, Hatake Kakashi.”

Kakashi stares after her, and then hurries after her. “I have three tomoe, I don’t have the Mangekyo.”

Sora shoots him a look. “Sure you do. Every three-tomoe sharingan has it. You just don’t know how to use it. We’ll figure that part out.” She hesitates for a moment, while he just blinks, feeling numb. “But, as I said, why do you have it?”

Kakashi blinks, almost laughing. “Well, I killed a friend?!”

Sora halts, and turns to him, her face seeming to shift with the shadows of the trees playing on it. “But you didn’t betray her, did you?”

Kakashi opens his mouth, and then snaps it shut again. “I…” He is silent, rebelling against the realization. Unable to say it out loud. No, I didn’t. He manages, finally, his voice pressed. “But I felt like I did.”

Sora narrows her eyes. “Did you utter that word?”

Kakashi works his jaw, blinking rapidly. “I…” He swallows, shaking his head. “No.”

Sora stares at him, into him, her hazel eyes burning. Demanding. “Tell me who said it.”

Kakashi grimaces, his voice a whisper. “It is impossible.” Simply impossible. He cannot have been there?

Sora tilts her head. “Unlikely. Impossible? No.” She clicks her tongue. “Tell me who said it.”

Kakashi swallows. “But that doesn’t explain why I have the Mangekyo either?”

Sora quirks an eyebrow, something in her eyes gleaming. Repeating, again. “Tell me who said it, Kakashi.”

Kakashi inhales shudderingly, feeling sick. His tongue feels thick in his mouth. Spelling it out will make it real, doesn’t it? “It cannot be…”

Sora steps up to him, staring up into his eyes. “Tell me his name.”

The world wavers, and tears drop down Kakashi’s cheek. The words taste like ash in his mouth. “Uchiha Obito.” There is no relief speaking his name, just blackness, dragging at him.

Sora hums, reaching out with one hand to lay it on his arm, gently, to lend strength. She nods, and then sighs. “Tell me why you have the Mangekyo.”

Kakashi’s gaze snaps to hers, the world blurring and unblurring again and again. He opens his mouth, the words feeling like glass, cutting into his heart. Making him bleed. “Because Obito betrayed a friend.”

Sora closes her eyes for a moment, her hand softly squeezing. “Who did he betray?”

Kakashi sobs, once, feeling like throwing up. “Rin.”

Sora smiles softly, and then prompts, very low. “Maybe. And, Kakashi?”

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, slowly sinking to his knees. 

He falls to all fours, unseeing, the grass and moss so soft under his hands. 

Her words drift down to him. “Who else did he betray, Kakashi?”

 

Kakashi mewls, and then sinks down, whispering the word into the damp earth. “Me.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The mushroom cream soup does not help to lessen his headache, but it helps with the nausea.

He’s not sure when or how they returned to the house, the memory a blur. He pushes the small pieces of mushrooms around in his bowl, remembering watching the Sandaime with Naruto, so long ago. A small smile flits over his face at the memory of the grinning boy, and then turns into a grimace at the memory of Naruto happily shoving the poisonous ones into his mouth, too. Without being stopped. 

He swallows, putting the spoon away. 

“Not hungry anymore?” Sora looks up at him, seeing too much.

He shakes his head, his voice raw. “No, forgive me, Sora-san.”

She quirks an eyebrow. “Sora. And it’s alright, no apologies necessary.” She shoots him a look. “Though, given how lean you jonins tend to be, I will need to keep an eye out for your health.”

He snorts, just softly. “Ahh, I’ll be fine, thank you.”

She smirks at him. “I estimate it will take at least a few months to train you into being able to use the Mangekyo properly. You will have bouts of sharingan exhaustion in between sessions, since you are not used to the heavy drain that we’ll put on it. We will work on that drain as well.”

She frowns, looking away for a moment. “I want you to eat very well, and go and meditate after breakfast every day, for an hour. Then you will go and help with the chopping of wood, to earn your keep in this village. Sometimes with axes, sometimes with swords, to raise your stamina and strength. And skill. I have an assortment of weapons in my shed. At noon we will meet down at the town center, and we’ll eat lunch and then you’ll help some of my neighbors with their dogs.” She shoots him a look. “I’ve heard of your special summons. Time to put it to good use.”

He blinks at her, a bit weirded out.

She grins, continuing. “Then, in the afternoon, you will read and then go swimming. We will train your eye every day after dinner.” She raises her eyebrows, and clicks her tongue. “I expect your exhaustion periods to hit frequently in the beginning, and you will stay in bed except for meals until you can lift the casket over there.” She nods at a small casket off to the side, and Kakashi eyes it, dubiously. She smirks. “Trust me, that’s a good gauge.”

He frowns, and she nods at it. “Lift it.”

Kakashi blinks, and then gets up mutely, stepping over. He bends down and takes the handles, and… gasps, groaning when he lifts it. He stares down at it, and then shoots her a look. “What is in it?”

She grins at him. “Lead cannon balls.” The grin softens to a smirk. “As I said, it’s a good gauge.”

Kakashi grunts, and puts the casket down again. “I see.”

He frowns, and then returns to her, hesitating a moment before speaking. “That is quite a detailed plan for my days you have set up…”

Sora weighs her head. “I talked to Jiraiya before I left. And I agree that you have to become stronger, in various aspects.” She holds up her hand when he opens his mouth, and he frowns, closing it again. “I know you are one hell of a ninja already, but the years of exertion and guilt have not helped with your development. And not everyone was interested in you reaching your full potential.” She grins, a bit meanly. “I’ll make sure you’ll be someone worthy of protecting their child when I’m done.”

Kakashi snorts and sniffs, looking away.

Sora reaches over, puts her hand on his arm. “I don’t need to tell you that the shinobi world is full of risks, Kakashi.” She smiles, grimly, her chin raised in a challenge to the world. “Let’s minimize them.”

 

He grimaces, and inclines his head. “Very well.”

 

She smiles, sharply. “And then, when you can activate it… we’ll combine it with the hiraishin kunai.”

 

Kakashi frowns. “But the seals were Minato’s? Aren’t the seals locked to him?”

 

She smirks. “We’ll see.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The days fly by, easy and with laughter. With memories. With physical and mental exhaustion, too, and with splitting headaches, and endless time, spent in darkened rooms.

With trying new jutsus, and other elemental styles, Sora showing him how to adopt fire.

 

With Sora battling his sharingan-enhanced genjutsus until something… gives.

 

Kakashi cannot really say what it is, or why it happens. But he feels it happen.

The wheels turning in his iris is a very weird, very… distinct feeling.

 

And Sora’s astounded gasp is beautiful.

 

And for the first time in longer than he can remember, Kakashi is proud.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kakashi hisses, raising a hand to his eye. “Damn, it’s bleeding again.”

Sora hums, reaching for a tissue. “You’re still trying to force it, instead of using it. It is yours, use it.”

Kakashi grimaces, wiping the blood away. He sniffs, waiting out the pain. “Arguably, it is Obito’s.”

Sora rolls her eyes at him. “Oh come on, Hatake Kakashi, not again.” She points a finger. “You have had this eye much longer than Obito has ever had it. If nothing else, that alone makes it yours.”

Kakashi pulls a face, looking away. 

Sora puts her hands onto her hips. “Besides, you have had it active now for almost the whole evening. And you’re still not unconscious! That’s a win!”

Kakashi snorts, and then shakes his head, silently.

Sora sighs, and then gets up to get a bottle of sake. “Let’s call it a day. Just let the wheels turn one more time for me and then put it on standby.”

Kakashi concentrates, and then jolts with something in his very being, feeling the wheels turn, obediently. He gasps, some more blood trickling down, but he smiles, watching the fireflies dance around the lantern. Watches the dust blow off their wings with every beat of them, sparkling in the light. He tracks the particles for a moment, and then lets the wheels retract into the three tomoe again. “At least it works now when I want it to work.”

Sora hums. “Indeed. Now we only have to actually use these working wheels.”

Kakashi grimaces again, pulling his hitai-ate down with a relieved sigh, and then accepts the glass with sake from her. “Do you really think I will be able to use a space-time-jutsu?”

Sora shrugs. “Why not? Do you think the Uchiha wondered much about that?”

Kakashi sighs, loudly. “No, but they knew they could use it?”

Sora frowns at him, and then takes a sip. “Maybe. But only a few people were ever able to use kamui, that I know. And as for…” She trails off.

Kakashi frowns, looking at her.

It’s her turn to sigh. “I know there were other enhancements. Other skills. The Mangekyo were all different, in shape and set of skills. Sometimes the skills were similar, but there was this whole catalog of what could manifest… it was a bit like rolling a dice, and then checking what the number meant.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. A catalog… a skillset in eyes.“Did they write that catalog down?”

Sora snorts. “Supposedly there was information on the Mangekyo in their shrine.”

Kakashi frowns, remembering visiting that shrine, so long ago. Meeting Itachi there. “Do you think it could still be there?”

Sora shrugs. “Maybe. I know it’s sealed now though.” She shoots him a look. “Besides. You’re here now. We’ll find out by ourselves.”

Kakashi hums, taking a sip, the alcohol burning down his throat. “What enhancements do you know of?”

Sora looks away for a moment, and then back at him. “I know the Uchiha were able to conjure the Susanoo, a kind of chakra monster armor. Some were able to use Amaterasu, which is a black flame that cannot be doused.” She grimaces. “I believe Itachi has it, if Jiraiya’s report is any indication.” Kakashi grimaces as well. “Then there’s the powerful genjutsu abilities, some of which you encountered already. And, if legend is true, they can do something called Izanagi, which his a… trick to change reality. They bend reality to their will by switching place with themselves at a certain place in time, hence making it seem like they can change reality.” She snorts. “And of course the ability to control the fox. Or, the bijou in general.”

Right. Kakashi grimace. He shoots her a look. “Have you ever… heard about purple sharingans?”

She inhales deeply, looking over at him. “Like the one Madara was supposed to have?”

He licks his lips. So you have heard of it. “Did you ever see him with it?”

She shakes her head. “No, he never activated his sharingan when he was around people. It was like a pet peeve. He ever only used it in battle. And I only ever heard about his… purple eyes after his death.” She frowns. “It was an off-hand comment by Hashirama I believe. Something that wasn’t discussed openly any further, for fear of others wanting to reproduce it.”

Kakashi hums, swirling the sake in his glass. “I see.”

Sora’s voice is soft. “Why do you ask?”

Kakashi shakes his head, weighing his head for a moment. “I believe there may be one.”

She stares at him for a long moment. And then raises her glass. “Well. If that is true, we really have our work cut out for us.”

He exhales, taking another sip. “Have any idea what it can do?”

She snorts. “No. But if that legend is true, too…” 

Kakashi nods, voice low. “Yeah.”

 

They are silent then, watching the fireflies dance some more.

Kakashi raises his eye to the moon, remembering Jiraiya’s comment.

Wonders where they are now, and if they look at the moon as well.

 

He closes his eyes, and allows himself to yearn.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“I heard you can now chop wood for hours with the longsword.”

Kakashi snorts, shooting her a look. “Yeah, while it’s a bit cumbersome it is doing wonders for my stamina.”

She grins at him, her teeth flashing. “Glad that works out then.” She picks up some rice with her sticks. “Why the longsword though?”

Kakashi shrugs, laying back against the stone to look up to the midday sun for a moment. “I’m not sure. I once… won a sword similar to this.” He snorts softly. “Fate is funny sometimes. Maybe I’ll need to wield it at some point.”

Sora hums, chewing. She swallows, and clicks her tongue. “I watched you meditate sometimes.”

Kakashi frowns, looking at her silently.

She smirks, and then ducks her head. “Sorry. But I needed to see the expression on your face, so I masked my chakra and hid myself.” She quirks an eyebrow. “You’re finally relaxing.”

Kakashi chuckles softly. “Well, it’s been five months.”

Sora hums. “Indeed. How does it feel.”

Kakashi swallows, pushing at his own bento box. “Feel?”

Sora sighs, settling back agains the stone next to him. “I believe Jiraiya talked to you about getting in touch with your repressed feelings?”

Kakashi grimaces, and looks away. 

Sora snickers. “I see he did.” She sobers, grinning when he shoots her a bit of a withering look. “I concur by the way. The Uchiha enhance and control the sharingan through their deep emotions.” She shrugs. “You must allow yourself to feel your emotions, too.”

Kakashi grunts, putting his head back, eyes closed. His voice is a whisper. “Allowing myself to feel has only ever brought me pain.”

Sora hums, her tone gentle. “This pain means we’re alive. It means what we feel is real. If all the pain in the world were gone then it wouldn’t be real anymore. Just an illusion.”

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, unwilling to comment. 

He hears Sora continue to eat.

 

There’s a bit of a pregnant pause.

 

Eventually Sora speaks again. “So. What do you feel for the boy.”

Kakashi barks a laugh, reopening his eyes. “Are you serious?”

She shoots him a look. “Very.”

Kakashi grimaces, and looks away. 

Sora sighs. “Why don’t you start with what you feel now.”

Kakashi hisses silently, and then bites the word out. “Annoyance.”

Sora nods. “Why?”

Kakashi shoots her a sardonic look. “Because I have to talk about my feelings?”

Sora smirks. “Mhhh hhhm. Why?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Because I like to keep them to myself.”

Sora’s eyes crinkle. “Why?”

Kakashi hisses, the ire in him burning. “Because they always just bring me pain.”

Sora sighs softly through her nose. “Not always though, right?”

 

Kakashi’s anger deflates, immediately, leaving emptiness in its wake. He works his jaw. “No.”

Sora hums. “How do you feel when you’re close to him?”

Kakashi swallows, harshly. The words are hard to shape, his insides churning. “Like I… felt when I was close to them.”

Sora quirks an eyebrow. “And how is that?”

Kakashi grimaces, putting the bento box away with a bit of a huff. “I…”

Sora smirks at him, her tone very gentle. “How did they make you feel, Kakashi.”

He blinks the sudden tears away, his voice quivering. “Loved.”

 

She is quiet for a moment, giving him a moment to collect himself.

Kakashi sniffs, allowing the realization to settle. The feeling to spread.

Sora shifts next to him, puts her own box away, too. “And you feel like that with him, too?”

Kakashi blinks, shaking his head, though not in denial. “I guess?”

She smirks, and looks up at the sun for a moment. “I guess you took my advice then.”

He is silent, staring ahead glumly. 

She sighs. “Allowing yourself to love him first is not a bad thing, Kakashi. In fact, it may be the purest form of love. It is a love that will bring out the very best in you.”

Kakashi snarls. “It is also I love I cannot seem to hide.” He grimaces, shooting her a look. “Which is something that… will be used against me.” He swallows. “Against him.” Has been, already.

She quirks an eyebrow, weighing her head. “Which is why Jiraiya took him onto that trip, too.”

He grimaces, looking away for a moment. So you know.

She puts her hand on his arm, squeezes it. “The pull between you will only get stronger. And yet…”

He licks his lips, shooting her a look. “And yet?”

She looks up at him, her eye huge and understanding and… steely. “Given the age difference between you, you will have to let him make his own decisions, too. His own experiences. This will be hard on you.”

Kakashi barks a laugh. He nods. “I… know.” He swallows, remembering his own thoughts on the matter. “I am… aware.” He frowns, clasping his hands together.

Sora blinks at him. “No you’re not. But you will be strong enough to bear it.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away. His voice is a whisper. “Will I?”

Sora squeezes his arm again. “I have faith in you.” She sighs, and then drops her hand. “For now, and for every meditation from now on, I want you to start by allowing these feelings for him to thread through you… Allow yourself to feel them. Look at the sun, and feel.”

Kakashi sniffs, a tear dropping, unheeded. 

 

Sora smiles, and picks up her box again. 

Kakashi clenches his jaw, and does the same.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“I have put my hiraishin kunai at the town center. Yours is in your room?”

Kakashi nods, with a frown. “You mastered it?”

Sora shakes her head. “No. But I know you have mastered some of their seals.”

He quirks an eyebrow. “You know?”

She grins. “I heard it from Kurenai. You sealed Sasuke’s curse mark at the chunin exams.”

Kakashi scoffs. “For what little good that did.”

Sora sighs. “Well, trust Orochimaru to make sure he gets what he wants. And from what I heard he really wanted that boy.”

Kakashi grimaces. “The only good thing is that through Naruto’s interference he got Sasuke too late.”

Sora raises her eyebrows, something in her tone. “Indeed.”

Kakashi frowns, vaguely peeved. “You don’t agree?”

She sighs, and then shrugs. “You know that Orochimaru’s influence is a strong one.” She clicks her tongue. “All your genins are under the tutelage of a Sannin now. They’ll be something else.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment. “Yeah.” He reopens them after a moment, shooting her a look. “Arguably, you could be called a Sannin, too.”

She grins at him. “Unfortunately, I didn’t meet Hanzo.”

Kakashi smirks at her. “Indeed.”

 

Sora crunches her nose, and then looks over at the woods for a moment. Her grin sobers into a smile. “So. Tell me about the seals Minato used. The ones you witnessed.” 

Kakashi blows out some air, fingers playing with the cup of tea in his hand. “I… saw him use the knife a few times. As you know the kunai carries the seal mark - which cannot be removed. He could also apply that to anything else… living or inanimate. And then teleport to it.” He frowns. “I later heard that he used it extensively that night.”

Sora is quiet for a moment, and Kakashi knows they both feel the weight of that statement. She clears her throat. “What else.”

Kakashi sighs, frowning. “He taught me the sealing process. But I needed a few years to master it.” He snorts. “And I don’t think I’m anywhere close to his level.”

Sora waves at him. “You don’t need to be. We only want to use them. Creating them… is another kind of story.” She shoots him a look. “Anything else?” 

Kakashi grimaces, his tattoo burning for a moment. “Jiraiya told you Minato hid a temporal component under my tattoo?” She nods, and he continues, lifting his cup. “I guess that must be an invisible seal, too?” He takes a sip of his tea.

Sora hums. “Probably, yes.” She frowns, and then looks at him, with a weird glint in her eyes.

He frowns. “What.”

She shrugs, blinking and then smirking softly. “I told you already that we often went onto joint missions with Jiraiya’s team, and that they started to work on those seals together rather early?” He nods, and she continues. “Well, in order to work on seals together, they worked out a key rather early.”

Kakashi blinks. “A… key.”

She nods, her eyes sparkling. “Yes, so that one could use the seals if the other was away, or the other way around. Minato wanted her to be able to use what they were working on without him just in case.” She raises her eyebrows. “You know that the sealing you put on Sasuke was personalized, don’t you.”

Kakashi nods, remembering the letters shaping from his blood. “Yes, it’s something that is linked to the user.” He frowns, something clicking, and his heart starting to beat faster. “You… think Minato gave me the key to use the hiraishin kunais even then?” He inhales, closing his eyes for a moment. “That is why both you and Jiraiya think I can master them.”

She grins at him, her hazel eyes glowing. “Yes.”

 

Kakashi puts the cup down next to him, looking unseeing at the world. “Huh.”

Sora takes a sip of her own tea. “Minato was always very cunning like that. Practical to a fault.”

Kakashi snorts. “That’s what Jiraiya said, too.”

Sora snorts. “Yeah, well, it drove Kushina up the walls.”

Kakashi cackles, trying to imagine. “Too bad I never witnessed that.”

Sora snickers. “Oh, believe me, you didn’t want to be caught in her path when she exploded.” She grins at him, leaning in a bit. “Minato loved riling her up though.”

Kakashi stares at her. “He… what?” He lifts his cup for another sip.

She snickers again, and then her tone grows a bit… lewd. “Oh yes, and apparently there were benefits to that, too.”

Kakashi chokes on his tea, his mind stuck somewhere between imagining and trying not to, thank you very much. He wheezes. “Sora!!!”

Sora laughs at him, loudly. “Well, you know, Kakashi, Naruto didn’t drop out of thin air.”

Kakashi groans, squeezing his eyes shut. “Please stop.”

Sora snickers, and then sobers, slowly. “Watching them make it work was a real pleasure. They were both so strong, so contradictory. And so fiercely loyal.” She shoots him a look. “They both loved you so much.”

He sniffs, suddenly close to crying. He smiles through the tears. “I loved them, too.”

 

Sora nods, and they’re both silent for a long moment. 

Kakashi clicks his tongue, eventually. “Why did you insist I train my eye first? I mean, before trying to train the seals?”

Sora shoots him a look. “You tell me.”

He sighs through his nose, and then averts his gaze for a moment. “Each enhancement of the sharingan comes with an increase of its abilities. Each level of abilities also comes with an increase of perception…” He frowns, hesitating for a moment. “You think I can see the seal now.”

She smiles at him, broadly. “Very good.”

He shakes his head, frowning. “And then? I mean, even if I can see this key as you called it… it’s still their key?”

Sora leans in, just a bit. “Locked into your chakra system.”

He blinks. “Personalized to me.”

Sora quirks an eyebrow. “And?”

Kakashi stares at her, his voice sounding faraway. “And locked into Naruto’s chakra system, since it’s part of the seal.”

Sora waggles her eyebrows. “Yes.”

His throat is dry. “You mean…”

Sora leans into him. “If you master this seal, you can always reach Naruto. Wherever he may be.”

Kakashi swallows, staring at her. “Think he has a personalized key, too?”

Sora tilts her head. “We are talking about Minato‘s seals here, aren’t we.”

Kakashi snorts, something light and fluttering in his stomach. “Right.”

Sora grins, and then refills her cup. “Ready or not, here it comes.”

Kakashi laughs, shaking his head.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Sora stands behind him, watching him stare at himself in the mirror. “Alright. Activate the Mangekyo and look past the tattoo. Look at what Jiraiya felt.”

Kakashi frowns, and then jolts the wheels into action, watching them turn. Feeling stunned, breathless. “Oh.”

Sora grins. “Yes, they’re quite beautiful. They look a bit like whirling shuriken.”

Kakashi swallows, riveted to the sight of his eye. “Amazing.”

Sora smirks softly. “And now, look at the tattoo.”

Kakashi blinks, and then lowers his gaze, turning his body to fully bring his left upper arm into view. He gasps, the red of the tattoo now only a thin line, visible still, yes, but framed in thick black. Oh my god. His throat is dry, clicking as he speaks. “It’s so dark already… I hadn’t…”

Sora hums. “You hadn’t looked at it for a long time.”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No. I mean…” He clicks his tongue. “There was no reason to.”

Sora nods, and then tilts her head. “What do you see.”

Kakashi frowns, staring at it.

At first there is nothing much, but then… The lines seem to shiver, blur, and Kakashi stares, looking past the ink, past the lines. Past his flesh.

 

A sign lights up in his mind, a sign made up from letters, and with a swirl threaded through. It pulses, somehow, and Kakashi watches it for a long moment, perceives the shortening time between the pulses.

Kakashi gasps a laugh, and then closes his eyes, shaking his head.

Sora rubs his back, between his shoulder blades. “What is it, Kakashi.”

Kakashi sniffs, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose. “Well, it’s a temporal lock alright. A countdown, if you will. And…” He hesitates, shaking his head once. “Minato really personalized the lock… to Naruto and me. It’s made up of three parts.” He sniffs. “The key seems to be the third part of it.”

Sora quirks an eyebrow. “Can you copy it?”

Kakashi nods, quirking a quick smile. “Sure. Recorded, remember?”

Sora tilts her head, indicating the scroll off to the side. “Write down the third sign.”

Kakashi blinks, reaching for the brush. He draws the lines, eyes unseeing on his memory. 

Sora stares down at it. “That’s an Uzumaki fūinjutsu sign.”

Kakashi frowns. “But we already expected that?”

Sora nods, still staring at it. “Yes. Kushina did teach them to Minato after all…”

Kakashi looks at her, waiting her out. 

 

She shoots him a look, and then steps over to the little table, picks the knife up. 

She comes back and puts it down next to the sign, pointing. “Look.”

He looks down at it. “It’s similar to the last two signs on the handle…” He frowns. “I always thought it was simple letters.” 

She nods. “That was probably on purpose so no-one else would be able to use them.”

Kakashi blinks. “Invisible ink.”

She nods again. “I would bet on it.” She shoots him a look. “No-one has managed to master a jutsu like that since Tobirama and Minato.”

Kakashi continues the thought. “And it would have been really handy.”

She grins, broadly. “Oh yes.” She looks down at the scroll. “I believe we now know why.”

Kakashi exhales, and smirks softly, not quite knowing what to feel. “Quite a bit of a… prank.”

Sora snorts. “As I said, Minato did have mischief in him, too.” She frowns, shooting him an amused look. “But Jiraiya told me you were a bit of a prankster yourself?”

Kakashi blinks, raising his eyebrows. “Me?” He narrows his eyes. “When did he tell you that.”

Sora smirks at him. “He told me that Naruto had told him about your alter ego called Sukea the other day. Apparently Naruto really loves that side of your personality.”

Kakashi stares at her, for a long moment. His voice is… dark, his emotions catching up with the realization. “The other day?”

Sora hums, reaching up to squeeze his shoulder, her tone vaguely apologetic. “He sent a toad.”

Kakashi swallows. “You didn’t tell me.” Why… didn’t you tell me?

Sora raises her chin. “I did not wish to distract you. Jiraiya is keeping me in the loop from time to time.”

Kakashi turns away a bit, his guts churning. “Not me though.” He tries to get past the sudden bile in his throat, the anger that wants to rise.

Sora sighs. “The reason I asked him to keep me posted is so we could be there, if needed.”

Kakashi blinks, and shoots her a look. 

 

She squeezes his shoulder again. “They’re fine, Kakashi.” She raises her eyebrows. “Come on. Let’s find out how to use that fūinjutsu sign and then… we would be able to be there, in an instant.”

Kakashi blinks, his jaw working. “Right.” 

She smirks, and then steps back. “We still have to master kamui, too.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, repeating, his voice sounding tired. “Right.”

Sora sounds a bit wistful. Breathless. “Imagine if you manage to use both.”

Kakashi opens his eyes, slowly. Stares at her. His voice suddenly as breathless as hers. “Right.”

Sora grins, just a bit darkly.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi falls onto the futon, utterly exhausted. 

Sora leans agains the doorframe, watching him for a moment. “How many combinations of hand signs have you tried?”

Kakashi stares at the ceiling. He is silent for a long moment, going through all the sharingan-recorded tries. He knows he sounds as defeated as he feels. “All of them?” I‘ve been at it the whole week. 

Sora nods, her arms crossed. “Maybe we’re going about this the wrong way?”

Kakashi scoffs, tone acerbic. “Ah yes, and what could be wrong about finding the hand signs to use the seal?” 

They are silent for a long moment.

Eventually Sora speaks again, her tone careful. “Maybe… it doesn’t need any?”

Kakashi tilts his head and stares at her. “Every jutsu needs hand signs. At least until you have fully mastered them and can, like, do them in your mind.”

Sora nods, raising her eyebrows. “But… the flying thunder god technique uses seals that are locked to the user…”

Kakashi grimaces. “Yes. But you still have to trigger them?”

Sora weighs her head. “You mean concentrate on where you want to go.”

Kakashi frowns, and then blinks, very slowly. “A… simple concentration one?”

Sora shrugs. “Well, have you tried it?”

Kakashi stares at her, and then shakes his head. No. That seemed too simple. He frowns.

Sora nods, and then turns to go. “Tomorrow morning. After your meditation.”

Kakashi sighs, reaching up to massage his temples.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He frowns, raising his hands to form the seal. 

Concentrates and… nothing.

 

He sighs, deeply. 

 

Sora calls over, from where she is standing with her kunai next to her. “You do have to believe it, you know.” He shoots her a look and she laughs at him. “Oh come on, Kakashi, I could see that you don’t think it’ll work.”

He grimaces, raising his hands again.

Her voice drifts over. “Imagine you have to reach Naruto. Imagine the Akatsuki are there to take him. Imagine the fox is about to take over.” He grimaces and she yells suddenly, loudly. “NOW.”

 

He doesn’t think, just does, something, deep within him. The tattoo, no the seal under it burns and he reaches, and… crashes into her, tumbling to the ground with her.

 

“Ow.” She grunts, and he hastily rolls off her. 

He grimaces. “I’m sorry.”

She shoots him a look, while pushing herself up and dusting her clothes off. “What exactly for?” She smirks at him. “It worked, didn’t it?”

He snorts and then laughs, once. “Oh my god, you’re right.”

She hums, grinning at him. “I’m actually surprised you’re here and not with him.”

Kakashi blinks at her. “I…” He frowns. “You’re right. I reached for him, instinctively.” He grimaces, and then wonders out loud. “Maybe because his seal is still locked?”

Sora weighs her head. “Maybe.” She looks at him. “Did you get an impression as how long the time component of it was still?”

He shakes his head, but shrugs. “Not sure. I’d wager at least another year.”

She hums, and then pushes herself up. “Given you’re here a year already it might unlock when Jiraiya returns with him.”

Kakashi swallows, looking up at her. “That… would be quite a timing.”

Sora grimaces. “Well, that seal probably happened through an incursion Minato witnessed, right?” He nods, and she continues, with a sigh. “So Minato not only saw something, but he also had a timeframe to lock it to.” She shrugs. “I don’t think there’s much mystery to it there.” She holds out her hand. “Wanna try again.”

He exhales, reaching for it. “Yes.”

She clasps their hands and grins. “Do reach for this knife this time, just in case.”

He snorts and nods.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“Given the fact that you can now transport on close distances with the hiraishin kunai, I believe you are now ready to try for the more sophisticated space-time jutsu kamui.”

Kakashi looks over at her, once more on her porch in the evening. He sighs softly. “You believe so?”

Sora shrugs. “I know so.”

He is silent, looking up at the moon.

She shoots him a look. “You are hesitant using it.”

He opens his mouth, and closes it again, looking away for a long moment. When he speaks he lets his feelings color his voice, allowing them, knowing she knows them already. “I feel that… if I use his jutsu, too, I take even more from him.”

She hums, looking at him intently. Her voice is soft. “But you would also be very close to him.” She raises her eyebrows. “Who knows, maybe you could even reach him through it?”

He exhales, in a rush. Longing. “You think so?”

She shrugs. “I’m not sure if one sharingan will be enough to actually access whatever… dimension it is that is used for transportation, to be honest. Not without a lot more training I think. But…”

He looks at her. “But?”

She tilts her head. “You can use it to transport smaller things. Use it as a weapon I think. Or, we should start to use it like that.” She shrugs again. “In time, you will be able to do more.”

He hums, looking up at the moon for another long moment.

 

She watches him for a while, and he relaxes into it, utterly comfortable with her gaze by now. 

The words leave him, trickling from his mouth. “I had a huge crush on Minato when I was younger.“

Sora grins. "I know.“

Kakashi shoots her a look, only amused, any mortification he might have felt diluted through all the talks they already had. 

She smirks at him. "Minato knew. And so Kushina did. too. Minato was a bit flustered by it. But Kushina thought it cute. And she teased him, mercilessly.“

Kakashi frowns, with a grin. “Really.”

Sora grins at him. “You were a cute little ninja.”

Kakashi laughs out loud. “Oh god no, I was an obnoxious, idiotic, rule-sticking little ass.” He snorts. “No wonder Obito always butted heads with me.”

She draws up a knee, clasps her hands around the shin. “Tell me about you and him.”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, looking unseeing at the dark trees. “Uhhhh, he was an Uchiha, I told you, and he always wore those stupid goggles…” He snorts shaking his head. “I actually bought some for Naruto because they reminded me of him, and now Konohamaru and his friends have some too, and aalllll of them”, he spreads his arms, laughing the words, “want to be Hokage one day.” He lets his head fall back, chuckling. He sobers, slowly, but the pain stays sedate, gentle, a memory. “Ahhh, it drove me mad. I was so hurt back then, but unable to feel it. My father had just killed himself…” He shoots Sora a look. “But you know that and why, too.” She nods, ducking her head a bit and he shakes his, continuing. “It made me behave as if I had that big stick up my ass, always sticking to the rules, and even trying to trick Minato at the bells-test.” He grimaces, hissing a bit at himself. “I got a nice dose of second-hand embarrassment when the Sandaime told me that Minato had known all along.”

Sora laughs, loudly, hiding behind her hand. She shoots him a sideways look, eyes sparkling. “I can imagine.”

Kakashi snorts, and then sobers. “For long years, I wasn’t interested in anyone or anything.” He clicks his tongue. “Except him. With him it was different. Or… them.” He shrugs, staring at the ground. His voice sounds faraway. “The memory of them.” He smiles, painfully this time. “First his memory. Then hers, too. Then… theirs.”

 

Sora hums, tilting her head. “What changed?”

Kakashi snorts, devoid any humor. “Well, Minato’s little trick did manage to change me, I guess…” He shakes his head. “I mean, it was a gradual thing, but…”

She smirks, her eyes all-knowing. “But it was inescapable.”

He hums, nodding his head. “Indeed.”

She sobers a bit, her gaze gentling. “You’ve accepted that.”

He inclines his head, gives her a wink. “I… guess all that meditation was good for something.”

Her eyes crinkle, though her gaze stays on his, looking deep. “How do you feel about that?”

Kakashi frowns. Reaching for the word. He blinks. “Relieved?”

She nods, once. “Good.”

 

She draws her other knee up as well, shifting to sit across from him, against a beam. “Now. Tell me all about your crush on Minato.”

Kakashi groans, loudly, feeling his cheeks heat up. And here I thought I did so well. “You cannot be serious.”

She leans forward a bit, waggling her eyebrows. “Was it the hair? The eyes? The lips? His skills?”

Kakashi laughs, raising his hands to hide his face. His voice is muffled behind them. “All of it?”

Sora giggles, leaning back a bit. Her grin turns shit-eating. “And Obito. How did your affection for him play into that all?”

Kakashi groans, feeling the tips of his ears heat up. He opens his mouth, and then closes it again, and groans again. “A lot?”

Sora starts laughing at him, chuckling ‘bad boy’, and it’s infectious, and Kakashi chimes in after a moment, something in him breaking up, is being allowed to spread, for the very first time. 

 

He raises his eyes and burning face at the moon eventually, letting the tears and memories come, with a smile.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“You want me to transfer walnuts with kamui.”

Sora shrugs, and then takes a sip of her tea. “Well, I mean, we can easily discern how much chakra you have to use then, and how often you can do it?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, tone dry, intoning. “And his jutsu included 4 walnuts per day.”

Sora snickers, but sobers again almost immediately. “Well, kinda.” She shoots him a look. “Though, I think you’ll be hard pressed to actually do it four times at first. More like two, I guess.”

Kakashi pulls a face, sniffs in an exaggerated way. “Here goes my reputation.”

 

Sora pinches the bridge of her nose for a moment, grinning. “You’re in a good mood today?”

Kakashi hums, and nods. “Yeah, well, I guess… accepting…” Has done me good. He blushes softly, and shrugs, knowing she understands. 

She quirks an eyebrow at him. “Indeed.” 

He exhales, and then nods. “Alright.”

 

She nods, too, and then steps next to him, her voice low. “I want you to activate the Mangekyo and then pull the walnuts into yourself, one by one.”

Kakashi blinks, shooting her a look. “Into myself?”

She frowns, grimacing a bit. “Well, I remember that it looked like a swirl. Whether you punch through the fabric of space… or if you pull to rip it up is probably up to you, but you need to find the feeling.”

Kakashi frowns, staring at the walnuts sitting a few meters on the stone. “A swirl would indicate a spiral though… like a corkscrew.”

Sora opens her mouth, and then snaps it shut again. “Yeah, that could work, too.” She grins. “Well, then, Hatake Kakashi, open the proverbial bottle of wine.”

Kakashi snorts, and concentrates.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“Dammit!!”

He curses, viciously, while splinters of walnuts and rock drop down onto him, after having exploded into thin air.

Sora’s tone is dry. “If nothing else this could be a very nice attack?”

Kakashi gnashes his teeth. “If I manage to do this in any kind of controllable manner you mean. But it just… goes off without any warning.” He groans, rubbing his hands over his face for a moment, and then shakes his head. “I’ve tried to use it for weeks now, and the only thing we got is exploded nuts.”

Sora weighs her head, holding up what she is munching on. “The cookies I make from the nut splinters are yummy though?”

Kakashi grunts, rolling his eyes.

 

Sora looks at him, for a long moment. She puts the rest of the cookie into her mouth, and cleans her hands on a cloth, before stepping over to him. She places a hand onto his arm, and waits until she’s able to swallow, her voice low. “I want you to try it differently.”

He sighs, and shoots her a look. “How.”

Her hand squeezes softly. “Reach for him.”

He stares at her, his voice… off. “Reach for him?”

She clicks her tongue, grimacing. “Try to reach for him across time and space while staring at the nuts.” She nods, reaching into her pocket. “Here, I’ll put up a few more.”

She walks over and puts the nuts on the very battered stone, clapping her hands. “Alright. Reach for him.”

Kakashi blinks at her. “You want me to reach for Naruto.”

She stares at him, and then shakes her head. “No.”

Kakashi stares at her, for another long, long moment. His tone is flat. “You want me to reach for Obito?”

She nods, with a smirk. “Yes.”

He turns away, draws a shaking hand down his face.

Her voice is gentle, too gentle. “I thought you had come to some peace with your feelings for him?”

Kakashi laughs, just a bit grimly. “Yes, but…” But if I do this… I really admit he’s still out there. He closes his eyes for a split second. I really admit he’s alive.

Sora steps up to him, her tone soft. “But you already spoke out loud that Obito was the one who whispered ‘kamui’ then, there, in the dark.”

Kakashi tilts his head, grimaces behind his mask. “But if he’s still there to reach to now…”

 

Sora hesitates for a long moment.

And then she addresses him, her tone hard. “Kakashi… who was the one who attacked Konoha the night the Uchiha died.”

He turns away, his face twisting with the pain her words elicit. No. I cannot. I don’t… want to believe.

Her grip on his arm pulls him around, easily, her tone deceptively soft. “Say it out loud.”

He shakes his head, once.

Her hazel eyes are hard. “Yes.”

He squeezes his own shut. 

Her hand is warm on his feverish cheek. “Say his name.”

His whisper is almost inaudible, cutting deep. “Obito.”

Her thumb strokes his skin, under his right eye. “Very good. Now reach for him.”

 

Kakashi opens his eyes, and she smirks, turning him towards the walnuts.

For a moment, Obito’s youthful face with the big smile and the goggles flashes through his mind.

Running away from him.

 

 

 

In his mind, Kakashi reaches out with his hand, tries to pull him back.

 

In reality, a swirl swallows half of the stone and a walnut, and a big chunk of earth and grass.

 

 

 

Silence falls, as blood drips from Kakashi’s eye.

 

 

 

Sora clears her throat. “Ah. Guess we found the key.” She shifts to her other foot, watching a walnut tumble down from the destroyed stone. “And now we need to find a way to… aim.”

 

Kakashi sobs.

For a moment, a dark eye within a scarred face stares into his.

 

And for some reason, the pain coming with the vision is beautiful. 

 

 

You really… are alive.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He packs his things, almost 20 months after he arrived.

 

He’s still bad at aiming kamui, but they managed to get the maximum amount of usages up to four before his chakra is too low to use it safely. 

 

He has never felt or seen Obito again since that first time, but he doesn’t need to, something within him knowing he’s there. Out there. Doing whatever the hell you’re doing.

 

He knows that Jiraiya is planning on returning soon, with Naruto.

Which makes his nerves flutter, but it’s also a remote, sedate and deep feeling now. Drenched in acceptance.

 

He has heard that Sasuke has killed Orochimaru. 

And he’s not too proud to admit he’s smiled at that. Rather meanly, too.

 

He has also heard that Sasuke is now out there, looking for Itachi. 

 

Mr. Ukki has thrived beautifully on the little table, growing several new leaves.

 

The pebble is back in his pocket.

So is his father’s tango and the hiraishin kunai.

 

His pack has lots of new friends in the small village.

 

So does he, and he has taken care to go and properly say goodbye.

Which is why he needs to carry another bundle, too, because apparently he’s still ‘too thin’ to some of the villager’s liking.

 

 

There’s several photos in his backpack, too, photos of teams that were. And instances of laughter.

Sora had insisted, telling him he’d need them more than her. For Naruto. 

Later.

 

 

 

She hugs him, now, very tightly, while obviously fighting tears. 

And then she shoos him out of her house, laughing, and sniffing loudly. 

 

And she points a finger at him, calling to him, when he reaches the path leading towards the main street. “I expect an invitation to your marriage, Hatake Kakashi. I mean it.”

 

And he smiles at her, through tears. 

And turns his steps towards home.

 

 

And him.

Notes:

If anyone wants to discuss the betrayal part and Obito, my DMs are open, buuutttt a lot will be addressed later in the fic, so…. ;)

Chapter 23: Feelings, written on blank pages

Notes:

Naruto’s meeting with Kakashi after those ~2 years differs in manga and anime.

I went for a mixture (with my own changes of course^^), bc both versions… have their distinct… merits. 😈

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

There’s quite a few stacks of papers on Tsunade’s desk, and Tonton is dozing happily in a corner off to the side.

The sounds of daytime Konoha drift in through an open window, and there’s a whiff of takeout ramen. It’s almost terribly mundane and known. Kakashi blinks, smiling softly behind his mask. It’s heaven.

 

Tsunade smirks at him, legs crossed and swinging a bit behind her desk. Her tone is soft. “Welcome back, Hatake Kakashi. You look healthy.”

He inclines his head. “Thank you, Godaime. I’m…” He hesitates, letting his feelings and sincerity color his voice. “Very happy to be back.”

And yes, he does feel healthy. 

Exercise and rest and peace of mind will do that. 

 

It’s the truth, too, that he’s happy to be back, even though he misses Sora and her quiet fierceness and serenity already. And the forest. And the stream. And the lake. And the long walks and the meditations. And all the dogs he trained in between. But there’s also something in Konoha that makes him want to inhale, deeply, and never breathe out. Home. He smirks. 

 

Her eyes twinkle, obviously seeing right through him. “So. Looked at lots of photos of my childhood?”

Kakashi chuckles softly. “You were a very cute little girl, Tsunade-sama.”

Tsunade scoffs and looks away, but there’s a small blush on her cheeks, and a smile tugging on her lips. She clicks her tongue, the smile still on her face though her tone sobers. “It’s weird realizing that time is not that far gone, isn’t it?” She shifts in her chair. “I mean, I know I use my jutsu, but…” She turns back to look at him. “I remember my grandfather. And I even have this vague recollection of Madara where grandmother threw him out?” She shakes her head. “It’s even mind-boggling to me.”

Kakashi grins. “Sora remembers that, too. She didn’t go into details, but it must have been some party indeed for both of you to remember that instance.”

Tsunade snorts. “Yeah.” She grins for a moment, and then clears her throat. “Alright. So, report, please.”

 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, sobering a bit. “We worked on my stamina and chakra reserves. We have managed to activate my Mangekyo sharingan and I have found preliminary access to its powers. I am able to use the hiraishin kunai on short distances.”

Tsunade blinks, one eyebrow quirking. There is something in her tone he cannot place. “You have managed to master Tobirama’s jutsu?”

Kakashi tilts his head. Right. Minato had learned it from Hiruzen, who had learned it from Tobirama. Huh. He frowns. “I managed to… use the Yondaime’s version of it. I’m not sure how close or how far that is from Tobirama-sama’s.”

Tsunade stares at him. “Still. No-one has been able to master it since them. Every attempt failed. How…”

Kakashi grimaces. “Minato left me a key.”

Tsunade raises her eyebrows. “I… see.” She looks out of the window for a moment, and then chuckles. “Tobirama was always so annoyed that, you know he thought up another awesome jutsu - and he got so excited… - and then he usually realized its powers and then it subsequently got classified as a forbidden one.” She grins, her smirk tinged with memories. “He also barged and barreled into things and people while developing this specific jutsu, I remember that quite vividly.”

Kakashi chuckles. “Yeah, that happened to me, too.” He tilts his head, looking at her. “You were close?”

 

Tsunade shrugs, the small smile on her face sad for a moment. “I was extremely heartbroken when grandpa Hashirama died.” She shoots him a look. “I… we had a close bond.” She snickers. “He took me to…” She trails off, blushing, and clears her throat. Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. Not wanting to taint his memory with tales of gambling? She continues, shaking her head once. “Anyways, Tobirama took great care to come by several times a week, trying to cheer me up, despite all of his duties. He used to carry me on his shoulders. He even used that jutsu with me, once.” She giggles. “Mom yelled at him, like nothing good.” She sighs, shaking her head once. “I wanted to become a ninja, like them.” She clicks her tongue, her eyebrows rising. “He shaped this village, a lot.”

Kakashi nods, remembering his discussion with Kurenai and Asuma. “He did.”

 She sobers slowly, her eyes dimming. “And then he died, too. And Hiruzen took over.” She presses her lips together, and then clears her throat. “I was so young still, just out of his tutelage… As a Sensei, Hiruzen did try his best. But I never felt that close to him, and that was probably a good thing, in hindsight. And, I mean, he was able to use any jutsu, which was really impressive. But that also awakened Orochimaru’s fatal interest… but we’ve been over that.”

She pushes at a stack of papers for a moment, clicking her tongue. Her tone is a bit off. “Have you heard?”

 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, drawing the word out a bit. “I heard Sasuke killed Orochimaru.”

She nods, and then weighs her head. “Apparently no-one has seen Orochimaru since then.”

Kakashi tilts his head, trying to interpret her tone. “You don’t think he’s really dead?”

She grimaces, weighing her head again. “I… don’t know. I mean, Sasuke probably made very sure to kill him, right? But it’s Orochimaru, and Orochimaru…” She trails off, grimacing again.

 

They are silent for a moment, dwelling on it all.

Eventually Kakashi clears his throat. “So. What is my status now, in this village? Will I go onto missions once more?”

Tsunade smirks, and then looks up at him. “Yes, and no. You are still a jonin of Konoha, and as such, I will send you on missions.”

He tilts his head, narrowing his eyes. “But?”

She grins. “But Jiraiya has sent word that he’ll be back next week. And Sakura has become a chunin, but she is collecting the Hundred’s seal right now, which keeps her below max strength for a while.”

Kakashi stares at her, and then clicks his tongue. “Wow. That is impressive. And…” He swallows, his throat scratchy. “I see.” Next… week?

Tsunade’s grin turns saucy. “I want you to get back in touch with your friends, and her, and then be here when they’ll get back. I want you to test them.” Her eyes flicker to his hidden eye. “Them both. With no brakes on.”

He quirks an eyebrow. “No… brakes?”

She rolls her eyes. “Alright, some brakes. Still. Test them.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Very well.”

 

Tsunade nods, and then sighs, deeply, looking down onto her desk and the scroll on it. “Now… if you don’t want to check the weapon’s report with me…?”

Kakashi chuckles, and then bows, just lightly. “Not if I can help it, Godaime-sama.”

Tsunade snorts, and pinches the bridge of her nose. “Wise choice.” 

She waves at him, and he grins, hesitating and then jumping out the window.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He has to admit, he is vaguely disappointed to discover that Asuma and Kurenai are away on a joint mission. And here I was, riling myself up over hints and insinuations made two years ago.

 

He shakes his head at himself and sets out to find Guy, after checking by Naruto’s old apartment, finding it a bit dusty but all the plants taken good care off. Thank you, Iruka.

He hesitates, but decides to go by his house later, his feet carrying him to the training grounds instead.

 

Guy’s team is there, with him, practicing taijutsu. 

Kakashi watches for a while, knowing Guy knows, but allows him his own entrance.

Tenten is whirling through the air, throwing weapons at targets while dodging Lee’s attacks. Who is back in form quite obviously, and with weights on arms and feet again. Kakashi smirks softly, his gaze turning to Neji.

Neji looks… peaceful. Or, as peaceful as one can look while sparring doggedly with your teacher. 

Kakashi smirks, watching the veins stand out around Neji’s eyes with the byakugan active. 

 

When Guy breaks the sparring to allow them all a moment to drink, he drops into their midst, holding up his hand. “Yo.”

Guy’s face lights up, like the sun. Framed in tears. “My rival!!”

He rushes at Kakashi, squeezing him tightly, and Kakashi laughs gently, while trying to breathe. “Mah, mah, easy. I’m not going to disappear again.” He grins at Guy, and hugs back, for a moment. “It’s good to be back.” He steps back a bit, nodding at Guy’s pupils. “I see you’re practicing as hard as ever.”

Lee pipes up, fist raised. “I wish to reap the benefits of my youth while I can, to fulfill my destiny!”

Kakashi blinks, the corners of his mouth quirking. “Right.” He shoots Tenten a look, watches as she catches herself from obviously wanting to roll her eyes. He nods at all the weapons laying around. “Your ability to conjure weapons has increased tenfold!” She beams at him, blushing, and Kakashi turns to look at Neji, who is watching him silently. 

And who then bows, his tone low. “Sensei Kakashi. It is a pleasure to see you’re back.”

Kakashi pauses, looking at him. Notices that the aura of anger that surrounded him before seems to be gone. He softens his voice. “I’m very happy to see you’re well.”

 

Neji inclines his head. “The last two years have marked lots of change in Konoha.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Have they?” He shoots a look up at Guy, who nods. What changes are we talking about? “I’m happy to hear that.”

Neji smirks, and then looks up at him. “Will you go by the Hyuuga complex later? I’m sure Hinata-san would love to welcome you back as well?”

Kakashi blinks, and then shrugs, just a bit. “Sure.”

Guy pipes up, his lip quivering, obviously more than proud of Neji. “Why don’t you go with Kakashi and meet her, Neji? I am sure my rival will wish to witness the height of the beauty your soul has soared to!”

Kakashi blinks, and then shares a somewhat amused glance with Neji, who smirks. “It would be my pleasure, Sensei Kakashi.

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, shoots Guy a look. Decides to… suffer a bit for him. “A race from the gate  down to training ground 44 later?” The exhaustion will enable me to sleep, at the very least.

Guy lifts his fist into the sky, tears falling down his face once more. “I will be here.” He sniffs, more tears falling. “Oh, how I have missed you!!”

Kakashi nods, and then turns away with a smirk. “Later, then!”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Wandering through Konoha with Neji is weirdly comfortable, and nothing Kakashi had anticipated to be happening anytime soon. 

 

He shoots the dark haired boy next to him a look, noting the almost serene expression. His eyes drop down to the jonin vest Neji wears for a moment. “So. You went and not only became chunin while I was away, but you got promoted to jonin, too, do I see that correctly?”

Neji smirks, and ducks his head, just a bit. “You are correct, Sensei Kakashi.” Neji hesitates, and then locks his pale eyes with Kakashi, something glowing in them. “I would love to spar against you, at some point?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, and then clicks his tongue, just slightly. “Mahh, mahh, I’m sure we can.” He shrugs. “However, I’ve been tasked to test Naruto and Sakura as soon as Naruto is back and…”, he hesitates, weighing his head, “I might need to see if they put me into the hospital first.”

Neji snorts and then looks away, cheeks colored.

 

Kakashi shoots him a look, tone dry, but also weirdly peeved. “What. You don’t think they’re strong enough?”

Neji looks up at him. “Sensei, forgive me, but I know you have been Sensei Guy’s rival ever since your childhood. No matter how good Sakura, Naruto and I may have become… I doubt we would be able to put you into the hospital. At least against your wishes.”

Against my… Kakashi frowns, shooting him a skunk eye, but makes sure to suffuse his voice with humor. “Neji-san, are you insinuating I put myself into the hospital on purpose?”

Neji’s eyes shoot up to him, and he’s stammering a bit. “I… no, Sensei, I mean….” He sighs, deeply, while blushing hard. When he speaks again, his voice almost sounds normal again. “No. But I know that most of your frequent hospital stays have to do with sharingan exhaustion. So if they manage to put you into the hospital, I believe it is because you choose to use it extensively.”

 

Kakashi blinks, raising his eyebrows. “Is that so.”

Neji shoots him a sly look, obviously quoting. “I’ve heard from the other jonin that… you never stay put in that bed for anything else.”

Kakashi laughs out loud at that, his shoulders shaking. “Ohhhhh, that was Asuma, right?”

Neji ducks his head. “Forgive me.”

Kakashi shakes his head, running his tongue along his front teeth for a moment. “Nothing to forgive.” He sobers slowly, exhaling. “So. Where are Asuma and Kurenai? Do you know?”

Neji hums, lowering his voice. “I believe they have been sent out to keep track of the Akatsuki’s movements.”

 

And just like that, emotional gravity returns. Kakashi sighs. “They are on the move?”

Neji nods. “Some of the jinchuriki have disappeared.”

Kakashi grimaces, ice settling in his stomach. “Which ones.”

Neji exhales. “Yugito Nii, the two-tails jinchuriki, and Han, the five-tails jinchuriki we know of.”

Dammit. Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Anything else?”

Neji weighs his head. “There is a new Mizukage.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. The bijou that was in Rin… He opens them again. “So they likely have the three-tails as well. Or have gone after it at least.”

Neji turns into the street to the Hyuuga complex, and Kakashi falls into step with him, brooding a bit on the new knowledge. 

Neji is silent for a long moment, halting in front of the gate. He sighs softly. “We do not know what they do with them. Nor do we know by which criteria they come for them.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a second, his voice scratchy. “Strength, likely.”

Neji hums. “We think so, too. And…” He trails off.

Kakashi gnashes his teeth. Availability. He blinks. They’ll come for Naruto soon.

 

Neji pushes the gate open, the big wooden frame swinging open with hardly a sound.

 

They courtyard is empty, and Kakashi shoots a look at the tree off to the side, remembering Kurenai standing there. He imagines he can almost smell the scent of tobacco.

He smirks softly to himself. 

Neji shoots him a look, obviously noting his gaze. “They are set to return in two days. The Godaime has sent us out in rotation. Just to track, if possible. To… discourage if tracking was not possible. We were told not to engage though.”

Kakashi hums, and nods, remembering Jiraiya’s words. “Good thinking.”

Neji quirks an eyebrow, while stepping up onto the porch of the house. “Are they really this powerful?”

Kakashi sighs, toeing off his shoes. Thinking of Itachi and Konan, and what he knows of Nagato. And who else he suspects is part of it all. He grimaces, his tone clipped. “Yes.”

Neji nods once, and then pushes open the outer sliding door.

 

The inside is also quiet and Kakashi frowns, shooting Neji a look, guessing. “You’re not using the main house?”

Neji shakes his head, his long hair flowing with the motion. “No. It…” He hesitates, shooting Kakashi a look. “It didn’t feel right with Hiashi and some of the others gone.”

Kakashi nods, and then follows him through the house and over to the smaller side building, laughter drifting up to them.

Kakashi blinks, a smile on his lips, immediately. “Sakura is here?”

Neji smirks up at him. “She and Hinata-san have become friends.”

Kakashi shoots him a look. And then smirks, suspiciously relieved. “That’s good.”

 

Neji calls out softly, politely announcing his presence. “Hinata-san, I have brought a guest.”

There is a moment of pause, and then the sliding door flies open, and something pink, and grown, and strong barrels into Kakashi, hugging him. “Sensei!!”

Kakashi laughs, gently returning her embrace, lightly clapping her back. “Sakura-chan.” 

She releases him, dropping off his neck with a bit of a blush, but keeps on standing right in front of him, her green eyes glowing. He reaches up, to pat her head, making her duck it a bit, with a glower. And a smile. “Mah, mah, you have grown.”

She grins at him, broadly, and then starts exclaiming, in a rush, gesticulating a bit, wildly exuberant. “Oh yes, Sensei, and I have become a medical ninja, and I have trained a lot with the Godaime, and I have become a chunin, and my parents are sooo proud, and you should have seen the party that they threw for me, and…”

Kakashi chuckles, holding up his hands. “I see, I see. Easy.”

Sakura trails off, chuckling, and then hugs him again, impulsively. “So happy you’re back, Sensei.”

He rubs her back for a moment. “I’m glad to be back, too.”

She steps back again, and sniffs, and then giggles, with a small blush. And then calls back to Hinata, who is standing a bit shyly at the door. “See, I told you I’d be total mush when he’d get back.”

Hinata chuckles softly, and then bows her head. “Kakashi-san.”

 

Kakashi bows his head as well, while dwelling on the fact that Sakura’s ‘mush’ is threaded through and through with determination now, and confidence. “Hinata-san. It is so good to see you.” And well, he doesn’t say, but they all hear it.

For a moment they’re all silent. 

And then Hinata smiles, softly, and tilts her head. “Would you like some tea, Sensei? We could talk a bit about the last two years?”

Kakashi inclines his head, noting the quiet strength in her voice. “That would be lovely.” Getting away from the pressure has done you good, indeed. And it has obviously saved Neji. He hesitates, and then adds drily. “No biscuits or other food for me though. I was reckless enough to challenge Guy for a race later on.”

Hinata giggles, hiding her face behind her hand for a moment, while Sakura groans. Her voice carries a definite tease. “Well, we’ll be able to see if you managed to keep up with us while you were away, won’t we.”

Kakashi grins, thinking about the test that is coming up for her and that she doesn’t know of. “Mhh hmmm.”

She shoots him a look, and then shares one with Hinata. And then grins. “Oh, this will be fun.”

 

Kakashi blinks, following the two giggling girls into the house, and sharing a somewhat bemused look with Neji. The thought comes with a bitter sweetness. They really have grown a lot.

 

He inhales, deeply. Wondering.

So. How will you have changed?

 

 

Sakura laughs, and derails his thoughts, and he concentrates, on the here and now.

 

With the tiniest bit of effort.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He knocks on the teacher’s lounge door, softly, just like all those years back.

Just that I’m wearing only one mask now… and the uniform is different. He smirks softly, somewhere between regret and humor. And the lookout is different, too.

The door opens, and this time Iruka stands there immediately, just a bit breathless, obviously having scanned for and recognized his chakra. Iruka’s eyes are glowing, and without a further word he steps forward and envelops Kakashi in a bear hug, holding tight. 

Kakashi exhales and returns it, sinking into it even, for just a moment. He grins behind his mask, while squeezing tightly. “Honey, I’m back?!”

Iruka snorts, and then chuckles, shaking his head against his neck. “Ass.” He withdraws a bit, still grinning, and looks up at Kakashi. His fingers come up to pull just softly on the edge of the mask and Kakashi frowns, but Iruka giggles. “You’ve got a tan line. You must…” He pulls a bit, with his tongue pressed between his front teeth in deep amusement, and tugs at the mask. “There. Now you cannot see it.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, willing his cheeks to stop flaming. “I… thank you.”

Iruka grins, his eyes sparkling. “Don’t mention it. You just came back?”

Kakashi nods. “Yesterday, actually.” He holds up his hand at the sudden ire he can see in those expressive eyes. “I went by your house yesterday evening, but you weren’t there?” 

“Ah.” Iruka scratches his head, blushing a bit. “Yeah, I was pulling an all-nighter. The new school year and all that, you know.”

Kakashi hums, remembering. “Right.”

Iruka shoots a look off to the side, obviously gauging his available time while sighing at the staples of paper. “I have time for lunch - want to go  to that shop with the filled onigiris you like so much? They have tables to eat at now.”

Kakashi smiles, widely. “I’d love to.”

Iruka smiles back. “Good.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Iruka points his sticks. “So. You managed to train successfully then?”

Kakashi nods, eating speed enhanced, not in the mood for a public display. “Yes. It still took a lot of time because especially at first I had a lot of chakra-exhaustion induced downtimes…”

Iruka hums. “I cannot imagine flashing through space-time. That must be so weird?”

Kakashi shrugs. “It’s mostly a sense of nothing, actually. And currently the only thing on my mind is ‘don’t barrel into things’.” 

Iruka snorts, and giggles, while shaking his head. “Think that was on Minato-san’s mind, too?”

Kakashi shrugs, only feeling warmth. “I have no idea. I mean, he mastered it, right, so he probably was able to use it on instinct. I still have a long way to go from here.”

Iruka weighs his head. “And the eye?”

Kakashi leans forward a bit, pushing the hitai-ate up for a moment, and turns the wheels.

Iruka gasps. “Oh, that is so cool!” He blinks, his eyes locking with Kakashi’s right one again as Kakashi lets the hitai-ate back down. “What does it do?”

Kakashi tilts his head, with a grin. “I… three walnuts per day.”

Iruka stops chewing. “What?”

Kakashi snickers, and then shrugs. “I can use it three times, right now. And I can… like open a dimensional rift to transfer objects to. Just things though, there’s resistance if I want to apply it to myself for example. So. We practiced with walnuts. But I’m still very bad at aiming.”

Iruka blinks at him. “Okay… you cannot aim properly because you only have the one eye and the depth focus is missing?”

Kakashi nods, shrugging. “I think so, yes. I mean, it’s getting better. But it will take quite a while yet for me to be able to use it precisely.”

Iruka shrugs. “Still. That’s pretty cool.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, thinking about Obito for a long moment. “Yeah.”

Iruka smirks, looking right through him. “Had a nice time coming to terms with everything, too?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, letting the humor coloring his voice. “She sat me down to meditate, every day. And she was quite blunt pushing my nose to things.” He chuckles, reaching for another onigiri. “She told me lots of stories, too.”

Iruka’s eyes flash. “Oh, do tell.”

Kakashi laughs. “Just stories about her childhood, and her years with… them. I can tell you later.” His smile turns wistful. “I finally found some peace.” He clicks his tongue. “We’ll see how long it will last.”

Iruka reaches out, clasps his hands for a moment. “Yeah, I can see that it has done you good.” He squeezes. “I’m very glad.”

 

Kakashi turns his hand, and squeezes back, for a long moment. Keeping his voice neutral. “So. You. How was life in Konoha for you?”

Iruka smirks, reaching for his cup of tea. “Surprisingly peaceful. While there was a bit of a hush right after the Godaime took over for obvious reasons, the other clans took to her quite easily though. And given how she handled it all the daimyo was happy as well, since the deal with Sunagakure has proven to be quite lucrative.” He takes a sip. “Konohamaru is training feverishly to show Naruto how good he’s become when he gets back, which is good because it kept him from missing him too much. Asuma has tried to fill the void by being by, but they were never that close due to Asuma’s public problems with his father, and both the Sandaime dying and Naruto leaving has thrown Konohamaru for a bit of a loop at first.” He grimaces. “He even resorted to playing pranks like you know who for a while.”

Kakashi weighs his head, with a shrug, prompting gently. “Glad that seems to be a problem of the past?”

Iruka nods, humming. “Yeah, I did point out to him that he needed to shift his energy to train instead of pranks if he wanted to keep up.”

Kakashi grins. “Ah.” Well done, Iruka. He clicks his tongue, softening his voice. “And you, Iru-kun. How have you been.”

Iruka sighs, leaning back a bit. “Busy.” He laughs, seeing Kakashi’s glower. “Well, I have been. I’ve been promoted, I think Daiko-san wants me to take it all over at some point.” He rubs a hand down his face. “Which will be another kind of beast, entirely.”

Kakashi’s voice reflects his sincerity. “There’s no-one else I would rather see being in charge of our youth’s education.”

Iruka groans, shaking his head. He grimaces, and changes the subject, and Kakashi lets him, with a quirk of an eyebrow. “Asuma and Kurenai have tied the knot, officially and all that, I think they’re trying for a baby.”

Kakashi’s smile is instant, and true. “Oh? I’m so happy to hear it.” He pulls a face, deliberately, with a playful glower. “Though I didn’t get an invitation.”

Iruka grins. “No-one did. They did it in a very small ceremony, with only the Godaime and Konohamaru present.” Iruka’s smile gentles. “I think they just wanted to do this on their terms, without the clans involved.” He shrugs. “I think I can understand that.”

Kakashi nods, humming. “Indeed.” 

Iruka exhales, looking at the passing crowds for a moment. “I have been by Naruto’s apartment every week, watering the plants.” He pulls a face. “One of them died, but I did manage to save the others.” 

Kakashi hums, clicking his tongue. “I bet you replaced it, too, didn’t you.”

Iruka laughs gently, shaking his head. “You really know me too well.” He sniffs. “I… am really looking forward to seeing the little rascal again.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “I cannot imagine what it’s like for you?”

Kakashi shrugs. “The same, I guess. It’s…” He frowns. “Abstract. I am nervous to see him, and I know he’s not going to be a little ‘rascal’ anymore, so…” He trails off.

Iruka snickers, tone heavily teasing. “He’s gonna be a big one?”

Kakashi snorts. “Probably.” He sober slowly, looking unseeing at the table. “I… Jiraiya sent some toads to Sora from time to time. She would then sometimes drop some news to me, but only ever after the toad had left again. She said it would only distract me if I knew I could reach them.”

Iruka nods, and then shrugs. “Wise choice?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, just a bit peeved still. “Yeeessss….”

Iruka snickers.

Kakashi sighs, deeply. "I know next to nothing. I know the Akatsuki didn’t catch him.“ He shrugs. 

Iruka squeezes his hand for another moment. "Isn’t that enough though?“

Kakashi inhales, deeply,  and then smiles at him, squeezing back. "Absolutely.“

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

"I hear congratulations are in order.“

 

Kurenai‘s smile is instant, wide. "Kakashi!“

Asuma grins, and Kakashi drops out of the tree in front of the tower he‘d been reading in. 

Kakashi steps up to Kurenai, bows slightly and hugs her, when her arms fly up. He closes his eyes for a moment. "I‘m glad to see you again.“

He withdraws a bit, and is enveloped in a bear hug that squeezes the air from him. 

Asuma energetically pats his back. "Ah, Kakashi, we missed you.“

Kakashi grins, and the tries to withdraw. "I missed you, too.“

Asuma shakes his head, and tightens his arms. "Nuh uh, no disappearing. At least not before you agree to come along for dinner.“

Kakashi snorts, inhaling deeply, something in him relaxing at the familiar smell and the strong body, holding him. Giving him strength. "Sure, I guess.“

Asuma finally releases him and Kakashi shoots Kurenai a look. "If that’s alright, that is?“

Kurenai raises her eyebrows. "Alright? We insist!“ She chuckles. 

 

She hooks her arm through his, and turns down the street, dragging him along.

Asuma trails after them, softly chuckling, while lighting another cigarette.

Kurenai looks up at him, with a sly expression on her face. “So. Excited yet?”

Kakashi exhales, and then shrugs, deciding to be blunt. With them. “Yes.”

Asuma rumbles behind him. “I really have to try to be there when he shows up. I need to see your expression.” Kakashi tilts his head and shoots him a withering look, to which Asuma just laughs, before leaning in and whispering. “As I’ve said. I saw you looking at the Yondaime. I reeeaalllly want to see you looking at Naruto now, too.”

Kakashi grunts, and then rolls his eyes.

Kurenai squeezes his arm, her voice a weird mixture of amusement and regret, aimed at Asuma. “Unfortunately, chances for that are low. We are set to be sent out once more in two days after all.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, his tone dripping with sarcasm. “Ahhh, such a shame.”

Asuma pokes him into his back.

Kakashi chuckles.

Kurenai shakes her head, grinning. “And to think people always think you’re such a bore, always just reading… porn.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, and shrugs, voice intentionally aloof. “It’s a carefully upheld reputation.”

“Mhhh hmmmm.” She bites her lips for a moment, and then smiles softly. “Sora-san has done you some good.”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, with a bit of a sigh. “The time with her has been…” He trails off, looking for the right word.

Asuma flips his cigarette away, blowing the last smoke up into the heavens. “Cathartic?”

Kakashi blinks, looking back at him, while Kurenai releases his arm to open the door to the barbecue restaurant. He frowns, and then nods. “Yes.”

Asuma’s hand comes up, settles on his shoulder, so close to Kakashi’s throat that the thumb can press into the gap of the uniform, and onto his collarbone. He blinks, while a smirk appears on Kurenai’s face. 

Asuma tilts his head, voice low. “So. Wanna spend the night with us?”

Kakashi blinks, and then looks over at Kurenai, who smirks with a quirked eyebrow, and then back at Asuma. 

Knowing he agrees to more than dinner. 

Much more. “Sure.”

 

Kurenai bites her lips.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He watches them kiss, and then pushes his nose into Asuma‘s hair, and his body forward, feeling the groan he pulls from him. 

 

Kurenai giggles, and then mewls, as Asuma moves, between them. 

 

Kakashi bites him, none too gently, in delight. 

 

 

When the world shakes with thrusts, later, he turns into her kiss, and just… lets himself fall.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Five days later he is sitting in front of Tsunade’s window, nonchalantly, projecting boredom, his eyes unseeing on the pages of his book, while his heart thunders.

And the tattoo burns.

 

His throat is dry.

 

He has felt Naruto’s chakra when he and Jiraiya had entered the village.

Has tracked it, to the apartment, and then to the tower. 

Has shared a long, amused look with Jiraiya, who had looked up as he had walked behind the obviously exuberant boy, who in turn had had only eyes for Sakura and who had talked non-stop on his way to the tower.

Has noticed that Naruto wears a new jumpsuit. Black and orange, remembering his own words. Black looks good on him, but he loves orange. The slingshot itself is gone, but the handles of it are still there.

Jiraiya’s amusement is trickling off of him, something that is tangible in the air.

 

Kakashi tries to relax.

 

Naruto is now in the room behind the wall, talking with Tsunade. With Jiraiya, and Sakura. 

And now Shikamaru and the Wind’s liaison, Temari.

 

Kakashi swallows, his palms sweaty, when Tsunade tells Naruto of his test. And then directs his focus to the window.

 

Breathing is nothing Kakashi can do right now. 

 

Naruto’s face appearing through it is too real somehow, drenched in Kakashi’s wishful thinking.

Kakashi blinks, trying to make sense of all the impressions rushing up, all the feelings flooding him.

 

There’s sheer, unadulterated relief, and joy. 

And deep, deep longing.

And bittersweet… awareness.

 

And...

Kakashi blinks, and tries to concentrate on what he sees, instead.

Naruto’s face is vaguely different, juvenile but not childish anymore, and the hair is the tiniest bit more tamed, and he seems to be up to Kakashi’s eyes now, in regards to height. 

There’s awareness in these blue eyes, too, but they’re innocent still thank god, and you’re so lucky Jiraiya, you have no idea, and the smile is exuberant and instantaneous and true, and tearing at Kakashi’s soul.

And there’s muscles, coming with these slightly lanky limbs. The thought is bittersweet. Put you through the paces, huh?

Kakashi swallows, trying to focus on Naruto’s words, the mouth moving.

“Sensei Kakashi - you haven’t changed a bit!”

 

Naruto’s voice is vaguely darker, but still unmistakeable his, and something in Kakashi relaxes, just a bit.

 

Kakashi grins, and then carefully gives Naruto an eye-smile, deciding to rely on a known response. “Yo.” He smirks, swallowing. “You’re back.”

Naruto grins, too, his eyes lighting up even more. There is warmth and humor in his voice, and Kakashi swallows again. “I brought you a present, Sensei?”

Oh? Kakashi blinks up at him, trying to ignore how his stomach flips when Naruto is near. Get. A. Fucking. Grip. He swallows again, willing himself to relax.

Naruto smirks, an then reaches into his bag, pulling a roughly bound book out. His voice is carrying a definite tease. “Oh yes, Sensei, and it’s something very special.”

Kakashi blinks, and suddenly he cannot breathe. In Naruto’s hands, NARUTO’S HANDS, is a book called ‘Icha Icha Tactics’, the title obviously done in hand and the book itself an advance copy and Kakashi’s hand shakes, KNOWING without doubt that Jiraiya will have put something of them in there…. And Naruto is holding it in his hands. 

Holding it for him to take. 

 

Has probably read it.

Has likely read it, if the previous trip with Jiraiya had been any indication.

 

Kakashi doesn’t recognize his own voice, the timbre to high, too frantic, as he accepts the book. “Oh, is that, is that…”

Naruto giggles, and his tongue touches his front teeth, like he used to do as a kid, and suddenly Kakashi knows that he is still that sunshine boy, still that dreamer, still the one to talk and try to convince, the one to… save.

The relief he feels is bottomless. 

Kakashi rips his eyes off Naruto, trying to not fall all over himself and around his neck, right here, and if you do that you’ll never let go, you know it, and he opens the book, his eyes unseeing on the pages. 

He can feel Naruto smirk at him.

He flips through the pages, and look, there’s Jiraiya’s swirling handwriting on the first page, and Naruto’s rather energetically one underneath, and he cannot breathe, unable to read what it says. He wants to hug Naruto, badly, and it must transmit, because Naruto’s smile broadens, the eyes glowing. His mouth opens, obviously wanting to say something, but…

 

Tsunade interrupts the moment, her words firm, and laced with double meaning. “Calm down, this is no time to fool around,“ She hesitates the tiniest moment. “Kakashi.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. Right. He opens his eyes again, shares a look with Naruto. 

Who rolls his eyes, back still turned to her. With a pout. 

Kakashi blinks. And then Naruto winks at him. And Kakashi cannot breathe. 

And Naruto’s eyes… darken.

 

Kakashi rips his gaze away, his heart beating in his throat.

 

What the… hell?

 

Naruto pushes up and steps back into the room, and Kakashi wills his heartbeat down, pretending to be unaffected when he climbs onto the window sill. Jiraiya’s knowing gaze feels like a lead weight, and Kakashi clears his throat, drawing on his Anbu training. 

He clicks his tongue, concentrating on speaking. “In regards to the one who will test you - that will be me.”

Naruto’s whole face lights up, delight written all over it. Sakura’s face echoes astonishment, and then resolve. 

Tsunade’s voice is firm, but carries pride. “Sakura. It’s time to show that you trained with me.”

Kakashi swallows. Training ground 14 then. Every other training ground will be too small for her destructive powers. He frowns. “I’ll give you a chance to rest though. We’ll fight tomorrow morning.”

Naruto’s yell is instantaneous. “I don’t need rest, I can fight now!”

Kakashi smirks to himself, shooting Jiraiya a look. Yes. But I want to talk with Jiraiya first. Jiraiya nods, just the tiniest bit. 

Kakashi exhales. “Training ground 14, tomorrow at 8am. Go by Ichiraku’s tonight. He’s missed you.”

Naruto groans, but then laughs, while Sakura nods, once, and Tsunade smirks.

Her voice is filled with amusement. “Well, enjoy your evening then, all of you. And good luck, tomorrow.”

Naruto glowers playfully at Kakashi, and then groans again, turning away with a deliberate pout. Kakashi watches him go with the others, noting how he is already taller than Sakura. By an inch only, but still… Kakashi smirks softly to himself, raising his gaze to share a look with Tsunade for a moment.

Jiraiya interrupts his thoughts, tone the tiniest bit apologetic. “I need to talk to Tsunade for a moment. Wanna wait for me over on the hospital roof?”

Kakashi tilts his head, locking their gazes for a long moment. What do you want to tell her that I shouldn’t hear? He clicks his tongue, acquiescing. “Very well.”

He drops out of the window and jumps, trying to keep his emotions in check. 

He will have his reasons.

 

Right?

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He starts reading the book, leaning against the fence. 

He doesn’t dare to read the dedication, knowing he is emotionally too unstable right now.

 

Later.

I’ll read that later.

 

There is a displacement of air, and Jiraiya stands there, smirking at him. “If you ask me it’s the best one I’ve ever written.”

Kakashi smirks, and then shoots him a look. “You may be right.” He looks away, clearing his throat. “So, what chapter is the reference to us in?”

Jiraiya chuckles. “That transparent, huh?”

Kakashi blushes, heavily, but keeps his tone gruff. “Just knowing you.”

Jiraiya cackles. “Chapter 11.”

Kakashi clears his throat again, trying not to give into the urge to go to that chapter right now.

Jiraiya hums, watching him intently. “I wrote this book for you.” He hesitates, and then grins, his dark eyes sparkling. “Naruto really loved it.”

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut. And groans. He shakes his head, once. “So… has he grown up?”

Jiraiya blinks, pretending to be hurt. “Huh - you’re implying I haven’t done my job?”

Kakashi shoots him a withering look, and Jiraiya holds up his hands. “Alright, alright. Come on, why don’t we go and eat a Dango.”

Kakashi exhales, and then nods, once, putting the book away. “Sure.”

 

They jump off the building, and walk down the street through the busy Konoha, in a moment of amicable silence.

 

Kakashi breaks it, eventually, with a smirk. “Sora-san had already prepared a room for me, with an orange pillow… was that your doing?”

Jiraiya hums, with a shrug. “Maybe?”

Kakashi snorts. 

Jiraiya shoots him a look. “Two years ago that would have earned me a skunk look.”

Kakashi grins softly. “Well, yeah, two years ago I was emotionally very… “ He trails off, frowning, searching for the right word. He clicks his tongue, settling on: “Raw.” Not that I‘m not now, too, but it’s… different. 

Jiraiya nods, and then indicates a little table in the Dango shop, rubbing his hands. “Indeed. I’m glad the time with Sora worked out.”

Kakashi nods, raising his hands to order two portions. “So am I. Thank you for sending a toad sometimes, though she only ever told me about them afterwards.”

Jiraiya smirks, tone vaguely apologetic. “Yes, we had thought that better.” He leans forward a bit, eyes gazing intently at Kakashi. “So. What did you learn with her?”

Kakashi hums, looking around the busy shop. “I can maybe show you, later.”

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow. “Alright.”

 

They are silent for a long moment, and Kakashi hums in appreciation when he eats one of the little rice balls, the Dango not too sweet. 

He clicks his tongue, swallowing, and looking up at Jiraiya. “He winked at me.”

Jiraiya tilts his head in inquiry, chewing.

Kakashi shakes his head, once. “When he gave me the book, there on the roof on the tower. He winked at me.”

Jiraiya’s eyes crinkle. There’s amusement in his tone. “He can be a little shithead.”

Kakashi glowers at him, just a bit. “Like that though?” Like… flirting?

Jiraiya hums, and puts down his empty Dango stick. 

He sighs a bit through his nose, and then leans in, tone low. “Kakashi, the boy is 15, well on his way to 16. He has spent the last years training with me, and meeting lots and lots of new people, including other teenagers. He has realized people really like his looks. He has experienced his first flirts, and his first… insinuations.” Jiraiya shrugs, clicking his tongue. “I’m not sure whether he’s experienced kissing yet, or anything beyond that, but there were a handful of evenings in that one town where he came back late and blushing furiously. I don’t think it went too far, but I also would like to remind you that his first jutsu was the sexy jutsu, and that he really likes that absurd jutsu, too.” He shrugs again, with a little laugh. “I know he worked on it, too, so who knows.”

 

Kakashi stares at him, unblinking. Trying to imagine… and failing, his mind blank.

Jiraiya smirks at him, but stays silent for a moment, letting him work through the information.

Kakashi clears his throat, but his voice is still a croak. “Have you… you know, told him…”

Jiraiya chuckles. “Have I told him all about the birds and the bees?”

Kakashi grunts, glowering, and embarrassed as hell, but unwilling to back down.

Jiraiya clicks his tongue, with a very broad grin. “Yes.”

Kakashi groans, deeply.

Jiraiya leans back, crossing his arms. “But he didn’t need much reminding… he seemed to know almost everything already.” He smirks, his eyes glittering. “He actually told me he had looked all that up when he heard of you and Iruka, because he wanted to understand the mechanics.”

Kakashi groans again, very deeply, hiding his face behind his hands.

Jiraiya’s voice floats up to him, teasing. Dripping with humor. “As promised, Kakashi… he’s all yours.”

 

Fuck.

Now that’s a loaded statement. And one he made on purpose.

 

Kakashi swallows, ducking his head just a bit. Trying to keep certain thoughts very, very far from his mind. He clears his throat, almost desperately changing the subject. “What will you do now?”

Jiraiya sighs a bit. “I suspect the Akatsuki will make their next move soon… so I’ll go back to gather intelligence.”

Kakashi nods, and sniffs, lowering his hands again. “Kurenai and Asuma have been tracking them.”

Jiraiya hums, signaling for the bill. “Yes, they’re appearing in various places.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “So they’re finally coming out of the woodwork.” He hesitates a moment, knowing Jiraiya knows that he knows that some of the bijou have disappeared. Knows that he doesn’t mean that fact itself. “What do they want?” What do they want with the bijou? The… jinchuriki?

Jiraiya sighs, while he pays, and then stands up. “Well you can be sure they have some kind of foul purpose in mind.” He hesitates for a moment, and then quirks an eyebrow. “Let’s go to somewhere more private. I need to show you something, too.”

Kakashi blinks, and then starts walking towards his apartment, the big Sannin falling into step with him, silently.

 

Jiraiya is silent until the door clicks closed, toeing his shoes off with a sigh. “Still as neat and clean as I remember.”

Kakashi shrugs. “And still as unused. I only come here to sleep, most of the time.”

Jiraiya winks at him. “And to shower.”

Kakashi clears his throat, shooting him a playfully withering look, to which Jiraiya just laughs.

He steps up to the couch and starts taking off his vest, and Kakashi follows him, watching him silently, some sixth sense telling him this has nothing to do with sex, despite the insinuations.

Jiraiya hisses a bit, as he takes off the shirt and fishnet underneath, before turning towards Kakashi. “Here, let me show you what else the boy did.”

Kakashi blinks, and then his gaze drops to the big Sannin’s broad chest - and the ugly, barely healed wound there.

Jiraiya’s voice is filled with humor, regardless. “It’s why I sent you away earlier. I asked Tsunade to heal it a bit more. It was still oozing through the dressing.”

Kakashi blinks, taking a step towards him, his gaze riveted to the wound. 

 

The wound is obviously deep, right in the middle of Jiraiya’s chest, and reminiscent of an octopus, stuck to Jiraiya’s flesh - only inverted. The skin is red and angry, and the tendrils feather out into little rivulets of more torn flesh, obviously digging deep. 

It’s also just a bit higher than the heart - which Kakashi can see pulsing beneath the thin skin over the wounded flesh.

His voice is breathless. “What… happened.”

Jiraiya chuckles, a bit humorlessly. “I opened the seal too wide. And subsequently almost died before I could subdue the fox again.” He sobers, with a frown. “I came very close to death there… a bit lower, and I wouldn’t be standing here. Naruto doesn’t remember it. I wasn’t able to gather chakra for weeks, which his why I also decided to come back now. And the wound wouldn’t heal properly. Tsunade finally managed to close it.” He snorts. “I bet the scar will be spectacular though, eventually.”

Kakashi reaches out, hovers his fingertips over the pulsing skin. “I’m so sorry.”

Jiraiya scoffs. “Don’t be. It was a valuable lesson in humility… something that a ninja in my position does not get too often.”

 

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, and sighs, while rubbing his face. “You say he doesn’t remember these instances when the fox takes over? Did you do that often? Open the seal?”

Jiraiya hums, reaching for his fishnet and shirt again, to get dressed, the movements careful, obviously still feeling some pain. “From time to time. He can access it now more easily, which is both blessing and curse, of course.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “You’ll have to carefully monitor him. He’s very, very strong through this chakra - but almost untameable.”

Kakashi frowns, sinking into his armchair when Jiraiya sits down onto the couch with a sigh. “Of course I made him sit down and learn other stuff, too. Tactics, history. We practiced ninjutsu and the tactics he learned about. The rasengan is almost flawless now, but still unenhanced. But you will see all that tomorrow morning.”

Kakashi hums, and then sighs, deeply. “I will really have to go in with no brakes, huh?”

Jiraiya smiles wolfishly. “You better believe it.” The dark eyes twinkle slyly. “The boy has matured, especially in regards to his awareness. There’s some slyness in him, even though he…” He clicks his tongue. “I think it would be best to call it: he likes his naivety.”

Kakashi frowns. “He… likes it?”

Jiraiya shrugs. “He prefers to go in believing in the good of things. It’s a decision he makes, whether consciously or subconsciously may be up for debate, but he does make that decision. He wears his innocence like a shield.”

Kakashi smirks softly, remembering a similar comment he made to Iruka, so long ago. He sighs softly. “I’m glad.”

Jiraiya smirks at him. “So am I.”

 

Kakashi hesitates a moment, his voice very soft when he speaks again. “I saw a lot of photos, there with Sora… Naruto has his expressions and soft touch from his mother.”

Jiraiya hums. “Indeed. And he likes that side of himself, too.”

Kakashi stares down at the table, unseeing. He smiles softly, concurring. “He does.”

 

Jiraiya sighs quietly, and then leans back against the couch with a very put on sigh. “So. What does an old ninja have to do to get a drink and a… presentation of your new skills?”

Kakashi snorts, and then gets up to retrieve the bottle of sake that has been collecting dust ever since he got it some years ago. He calls back over his shoulder, ignoring the way Jiraiya looks at him. “Want a snack with that?”

Jiraiya grins unabashedly. “Are you offering?”

For heaven’s… Kakashi blushes just a bit, but shoots him a skunk eye. “I did mean to eat.”

Jiraiya chuckles. “So did I.”

Kakashi snorts, while reaching for the rice crackers, ignoring the way Jiraiya pouts when he puts them in front of him. “I thought you wanted a demonstration of my new skills.”

Jiraiya’s eyes twinkle while he unscrews the bottle. “Yes… but maybe all of them?”

Kakashi blushes, again, heavily, and then clears his throat. “Let’s… start with the sharingan, alright?” Though he cannot help himself and remember.

Jiraiya toasts him, with a sly smile. “Suit yourself.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He knows Naruto and Sakura are waiting already, but he cannot help himself, he has to open the book’s dedication, staring down onto it for long moments, while Jiraiya watches him, silently, propped up on an elbow.

 

Kakashi sniffs, and forces himself to read it.

 

Jiraiya’s dedication is rather straightforward.

To one of the best. May your destiny fulfil itself.

 

Kakashi blinks the tear away, turning his gaze to Naruto’s energetic handwriting.

To Sensei Kakashi. You’re one of the best things that have happened to me. May you be in my life forever.

 

Kakashi exhales shudderingly, Jiraiya’s big hand in the middle of his back, lending strength.

And then that hand pushes him, just a bit.

Jiraiya’s voice is full of warmth, understanding and kindness. “Go and test your team, Kakashi.” He clicks his tongue. “And enjoy your time with them.” Something in his voice shifts. “We never know how much time we have left after all.”

Kakashi nods, and puts the book away, and he sniffs and opens the window to jump out, the sunlight dipping everything in gold.

 

Kakashi follows it, and the burning of his tattoo, to training ground 14.

 

 

 

 

Notes:

Yes, they will interact a lot more in the next chapters, no worries. But the threads needed to be picked up :)))

Chapter 24: Brand new awareness

Notes:

Swapping up the movies here and in the following chapters a bit, because I felt it fit better that way.
And *sniffs* - there was no way to include the (movie) canon’s beleaguering of Naruto’s “I love my Sensei” in this, since only Sasuke had heard it, dammit *laughs*
At least not here.:))
And I laughed TEARS at that post credit scene at the second one, and Kakashi’s reaction there. TEARS.

(I’m also adapting the plots of them slightly to match with my changes, but that will be more or less inconsequential here^^).

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

Kakashi listens to Naruto speak, non-stop, about the last two days, about tricking him into being defeated, with Sakura, to Teuchi and his daughter, and to Jiraiya and Shizune and Tsunade, and Kakashi knows that Naruto knows that they’d been there, watching, but he doesn’t care, just happily babbling on, eyes glowing, whiskers quivering every time he smiles.

Kakashi watches that mobile face, from time to time watching Sakura interject or laugh, both their hands wildly in the air. 

He feels weird, relaxed and happy, and content. 

For a moment Kakashi catches Tsunade’s gaze, sees her gaze gentle even more.

 

She had declined the offer to eat some ramen, too, but she had stayed, standing in the corner behind Jiraiya. Smirking. Shizune had excused herself, with a grin.

Kakashi had sat down and had pulled out his purse, knowing he’d bleed tonight nonetheless.

So far, it’s been 7 bowls of ramen. I wonder where he puts them. Kakashi smirks, looking down at his own half-filled first one. Maybe the fox needs them?

Jiraiya noisily slurps down the last of his broth, and then makes show of having to think about getting another, his third, to Naruto’s loud exclamations. 

 

Something tickles his senses, and Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, wanting to say something, but Naruto is quicker, suddenly quieting, and then exclaiming loudly: “Sensei Iruka!”

Iruka pushes the curtain away, a small smile and a hint of a blush on his face, mixed with vague embarrassment. “Naruto! I heard you were back. And I just knew I’d find you here.” He hesitates, raising a hand. “But I don’t want to interrupt?”

Kakashi grunts, moving up a chair. “Nonsense. Trust me, you’d only interrupt his inhalation of ramen.”

Naruto snickers and shoots him a look, eyes glowing, while Jiraiya cackles beneath his breath. “Ahhh, Sensei, come on, this was your idea?”

Kakashi hums, exchanging a quick, amused look with Iruka. “Mhh hmmm. My punishment for getting old and foolish.”

Iruka tilts his head, staring at him for a moment, and then turns his head, looking at Naruto. “Whyyy? What happened?”

Jiraiya snickers. 

Tsunade clicks her tongue, her tone smug. “They took the bells from Kakashi.”

Iruka turns his head again towards Kakshi, with a grin, while accepting a bowl from Ichiraku. “Really?”

Kakashi shrugs, with a put on sigh. “Well, they kinda cheated, but all’s fair in…” He trails off, blushing, his tongue refusing to shape the words ‘in love and war’”. Tsunade’s eyes twinkle.

Naruto boos at him. “Ahhhh, Sensei, weren’t you the one telling me that this is what ninjas do? Find the enemy’s weakness and use it against them?”

Iruka giggles, picking up his sticks, and turning towards Naruto again, with a quick smile at Sakura. “Oh, so what did you use to trick him?”

Sakura chortles. “Naruto had the idea to go at him directly, and then start talking about the ending of the new book. Spoil it for him.”

Iruka stares at them both for a moment, and then starts laughing, loudly. Jiraiya chimes in.

Kakashi rolls his eyes, but there’s a smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth, too. “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up.” He leans forward to glower at Naruto in a decidedly unserious way. “You shouldn’t even be allowed to have read the thing.”

Sakura blushes, but Naruto just grins, his blue eyes huge on Kakashi’s. “But Sensei, it’s so good. Wait until you come to the part where…” He trails off, biting his lips. Waggling his eyebrows. 

Jiraiya grunts, and hits him over the head, just very lightly. “Stop it, you little shithead. That’s not fair.”

Sakura looks at him, a bit comically, and Kakashi stares, his mind still trying to cope with the teasing. Because it had been. 

He clears his throat, trying to sound normal, and failing by a mile, if the half amused, half bewildered look from Iruka is any indication. “Well. That’s something to look forward to then?”

Naruto grins, broadly, his nose scrunching. 

Sakura looks away, clearing her throat. 

Kakashi narrows his eyes, wondering if Naruto told her about the book. And the ending. And whatever he was referring to just now. Or if she told Naruto about that thing with Jiraiya. 

He blinks, for some reason quite sure Naruto wouldn’t mind. At all. 

Naruto puts down his sticks, turning towards Iruka, and then impulsively reaching up and hugging him, tightly. “Thank you for keeping my plants alive, Sensei.”

Iruka clears his throat, hugging him back for a long moment. “My pleasure.” He sniffs, and then withdraws a bit, reaching up to clasp Naruto’s shoulder. “Glad you’re back.”

Naruto’s smile is instant, and pure. “I’m glad, too.”

 

Tsunade pushes off the wall with a sigh, and a small smile. “Naruto, I will go now. I still have reports to read. Welcome back indeed, I’m glad Jiraiya has done his work,” She’s interrupted by a ‘hey’ from the frowning Sannin and ignores him, with a smirk. “I will raise your pay to reflect the mission level you will now go on. Though you are still technically a genin, your missing the exams through no fault of your own should not keep you poor.”

She shoots Kakashi a look, knowing he’s frowning now, thinking about the inheritance. Her words are meant for them both. “Everything else will click into place in a little while.”

Kakashi blinks, and then inclines his head, deferring to her. She smirks softly.

Naruto waves at her. “Alright. See you, baa-chan.”

Tsunade glowers at him, for effect, while Sakura blushes and giggles, hiding it in a cough.

Tsunade rolls her eyes and leaves, with a very put on sigh. 

 

Jiraiya pushes up, with a loud sigh as well, stretching a bit. “I think I will now leave as well.” His tone takes on a bit of an edge. “Kakashi, Sakura, why don’t you come with me.”

Kakashi blinks, quirking an eyebrow. Naruto blinks.

Jiraiya leans forward, eyes twinkling. “I think a bit of old Sensei bonding will be good before… the next missions.”

Kakashi blinks, mouth suddenly dry, hearing what he doesn’t say. ‘Let Iruka have this, in case we cannot protect him from the Akatsuki.’ He hesitates and then nods, and pushes up, with a big, fake eye-smile. “Absolutely. Naruto, see you tomorrow.”

Naruto looks up at him, and then smiles a bit wryly, softly, obviously slightly disappointed. “Alright, Sensei.”

Kakashi reaches for Iruka’s shoulder, squeezing it and their eyes catching for just a moment, before nodding at Sakura. “I’ll drop you off.”

Jiraiya clicks his tongue. “We’ll drop you off.”

Sakura frowns, but waves at Naruto, before ducking under the curtains. 

 

Kakashi falls into step with her, next to Jiraiya, after having paid a fucking fortune. And after having ruffled Naruto’s hair, for just a moment. To his gentle laughter. And Iruka’s smirk.

They have turned the second corner when Sakura pipes up. “So. Why did you want to talk to me alone?”

Jiraiya smirks. “I see you really are as clever as everybody says.” Sakura blushes, but Jiraiya continues, shooting her a look. “You are aware what a jinchuriki is, aren’t you.”

Sakura nods, with a frown. “Jinchurikis are special ninjas, who are usually chosen to become the vessel for a bijou. Sometimes they can control the powers.”

Jiraiya hums, nodding. “Naruto is such a jinchuriki, though not by choice. Over the last two years I have tried to help him control his powers a bit better.” He shoots her a look. “There will be times when he will lose control. You will then have to help him.”

She blinks up at him, and then at Kakashi, and then looks back at Jiraiya. “Help him? How?”

Jiraiya sighs, deeply, lowering his voice, his eyes alert on their surroundings. “When the fox’ chakra bleeds out, it touches the jinchuriki’s skin… it seems to be… how do I put it. Corrosive. Maybe. I have seen Naruto pass out due to the heavy wounds he sustained. If that happens, you have to help him, quickly.” He shoots her a look. “As Tsunade’s student you are probably well versed in the medical jutsus already, am I right?”

She nods, with a bit of a pinched expression on her face. “So you want me to be… what… his personal healer?”

Jiraiya laughs, loudly, while shaking his head, the white mane shifting on his back. “Ah, no, no worries, I know that you are much more than that.” He chuckles. “And if I would demand this of you Tsunade would have my hide.” He snickers, while shooting Kakashi a look. “No, I just meant that you might want to look up the precise chakra manipulation techniques to heal corrosion and acid wounds. That way you won’t be panicked if the time should come, and he won’t suffer as much.” He sobers slowly, sighing deeply. “For a lot of the other wounds the fox’ healing powers are more than sufficient.”

Kakashi frowns, hearing the undertone. His own tone is biting. “A lot of the other wounds?”

Jiraiya shrugs, with a click of his tongue. “We didn’t need any healers during our trip.” He smirks, eyes glowing. “Which resulted in much better sake.”

Kakashi wants to kill him, the sudden bout of aggression vaguely surprising even to himself. He presses the words out. “You hurt him?”

Jiraiya levels a gaze at him that borders on cold. “I did not. He did however hurt himself while training.” Jiraiya raises his eyebrows, while staring at Kakashi over Sakura’s head. “He doesn’t know when to stop.” He snorts, his gaze gentling the tiniest bit. “I know someone else who does that.”

Kakashi looks away, his jaw working.

 

Jiraiya grunts, and then changes the subject. “You are collecting chakra for the Strength of a Hundred’s seal right now?”

Sakura nods, pride stealing into her expression. “Yes, I started shortly before the chunin exams. I had been afraid that I might not be able to compete in them and complete them, but we managed.” 

Jiraiya looks down at her, with a smile. “I see.” He looks up at Kakashi for a moment. “Why don’t you ask your Sensei what he thinks of it?”

Sakura’s gaze shoots up, her large green eyes unblinking on Kakashi’s right. There’s this iota of insecurity in her voice. “Sensei?”

Kakashi holds up his hands. “Mah, mah, easy. Nothing bad.” He leans in, giving her an eye smile. “In fact, I believe you might be able to surpass the Godaime at some point. If you really master this you will be a force to be reckoned with.”

Sakura stares at him, and then stops, in the middle of the street. Her voice is a whisper. “Are… you serious, Sensei?”

Kakashi tilts his head, lets his affection, sincerity and amusement color his voice. “I was tasked to evaluate your skills, was I not?” And you turned training ground 14 upside down ALREADY.

For a moment he is sure she’ll start to cry, but she sniffs, and turns, swallowing. “I see. Thank you for this assessment, Sensei.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, sharing a look with Jiraiya. She has matured, indeed. He grunts, falling back into step with her. “The chunin exam was in the Wind’s territory, wasn’t it.”

Sakura nods.

Kakashi frowns. “How is Gaara holding up as Kazekage?”

Sakura smirks, shooting him a look. “Very well I believe. We talked a bit about Naruto, but mostly he just is way more relaxed and…” She frowns, obviously looking for the right word. “Kind?” She grimaces. “I mean, when I remember back…” She shudders.

Kakashi hums, remembering the traces of Gaara’s victims they’d had to scrub off the arena’s walls in the stairwells. “I’m surprised they elevated him to this position after all the death he’s brought before though.”

Sakura nods, and then shrugs. “Yes. From how I understand it the contract between our villages was mostly driven by him, which accounted for a lot. Apparently the Wind was very afraid of Konoha retaliating after the Sandaime’s assassination.”

Kakashi frowns, sharing a look with Jiraiya. And rightfully so.

Sakura continues, shrugging again. “Gaara wants to acquit himself… while at the same time prove that even someone like him, a jinchuriki, can become kage. And a good one at that.” She smiles up at Kakashi. “Naruto’s jaw fell to the floor when he heard, but he was also so happy for Gaara.” She giggles. “I think Temari thinks he’s an idiot.”

Kakashi snorts, remembering Jiraiya’s comment regarding Naruto’s naivety. “Yeah, well, just let them believe that.” He smirks. “It will only serve him, because they will then go and underestimate him.”

Sakura quirks an eyebrow, expression thoughtful. “Right.” She hums, and then stops in front of her door, turning to them. “Well, thank you both for escorting me home.” She smirks, quirking an eyebrow. “And thank you for the assessment, Sensei.”

Kakashi grins. “I mean, it too.”

She blushes, ducking her head for a moment, before looking back up, eyes glowing. She nods, and then holds up her hand, and waves it, turning towards the door.

 

They both watch the door close behind her, and Jiraiya sighs, deeply, before chuckling. “Ahh, putting her under Tsunade’s tutelage was the best thing it seems.”

Kakashi hums, turning to the general direction of his apartment. Speaking the words and meaning it, too, despite the bout of anger earlier. “And putting Naruto’s under yours.”

They are both silent for a moment, remembering whose tutelage Sasuke was under. 

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Where is he, now?” He know she doesn’t have to specify who. 

Jiraiya shrugs. “Last I heard he’s looking for Itachi. God knows what will happen when he meets him.”

Kakashi frowns, looking up at the moon. “I choose to believe that me telling him the truth will shape his decisions.”

Jiraiya weighs his head, shooting him a look from the corner of his eyes. “I do hope so, too. But Orochimaru must have had influence on him, too.” And longer, hangs in the air, unsaid.

Kakashi grimaces, conceding the point. “Unfortunately.”

They are silent for a moment, and Jiraiya hesitates, with a sigh. Stopping in the middle of the street. He shoots Kakashi a look. “I have advised Tsunade to get that wood user, Tenzou, as a replacement for you if you should be forced to relinquish your position as leader of team 7.”

Kakashi frowns, heavily, his voice dropping to be almost inaudible. “But he’s the leader of the Anbu?” And I hadn’t planned on ever giving up team 7? What the…

Jiraiya nods, with a sigh. “Still, as a wood user he may be the only one to handle the bijou… besides you.”

Kakashi looks away for a moment, shaking his head. Speaking out loud what had been gnawing at him for a while now. “I am not sure how though. I have not used the eye for anything like that before.” And not even Sora knew. 

Jiraiya nods, looking around for a moment, with a sigh. “I know. The Uchiha took that secret to their graves… however, I was often able to subdue the fox again through employing a special seal. I will give you some of those seals to bind his mind for a time before I leave again.” He frowns, crossing his arms. “I really don’t like messing with his head like that, but it seemed very effective.”

Kakashi sighs, deeply. “How effective?”

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow at him. “I saw four chakra tails before I received that wound. I was able to slap the seal onto him before I passed out. I… doubt a fifth would have been survivable.” He snorts. “At least not in close quarters.”

He starts walking again, and Kakashi follows, looking unseeing at the dark buildings. He clicks his tongue. “So, what happens now?”

Jiraiya weighs his head. “Given the fact that the Akatsuki haven’t made their move yet…” He shrugs. “Tsunade will probably send him out with a chunin or two on some missions, deliberately without you. I know she wants to test his team play and skills a bit further.”

Kakashi pulls a face, clicking his tongue. “I see.” And I’ll hate every second of them.

Jiraiya laughs. “Well, at least you have time to read the book.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes but snorts, with a small grin, and another glance up at the moon. “Yeah.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“I was asked by the council to add a member to your team.”

Kakashi frowns. “I thought you wanted to send him out on missions alone?”

Tsunade weighs her head. “Heard that from Jiraiya I gather…” She sighs. “Yes, and no.” She clicks her tongue. “I’m sure you agree that we need to test his skills properly.” She smirks. “That bell’s test is all good and well, but it cannot beat behavior in real life situations.” 

She looks out of the window for a moment, sighing again. “However, the missions we’ll choose for them to do on chunin level will be ones that will lead him carefully away from any Akatsuki sightings only.” She glowers up at Kakashi. “And you, and Tenzou, and Guy will be on standby.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “I… see.” He frowns. “And that new member?”

Tsunade pushes a folder at him. “His name is Sai. He’s a former Ne.” 

Kakashi grimaces, looking down at the photo, the pale-skinned youth looking dispassionately at the camera. “At that age.”

Tsunade hums. “Must bring back some memories.” Kakashi frowns, not answering, eyes scanning the details. She raises her own eyebrows. “That is why I have assigned him to your team, and why Tenzou is on standby to replace you if something should happen. He was bound by seal to Danzo, so it’s likely there may be some kind of conflict of interest, but I would like to give him the benefit of the doubt.” She pulls a face. “He has a peculiar personality though.”

Kakashi blinks, closing the folder. “We’ll manage.”

Tsunade smirks. “Good.”

 

The door flies open, and Shizune pushes her head in, hand still on the doorknob. “Tsunade-sama, we have reports of a large flying structure violating our borders… who should I get?”

Tsunade shoots a look at Kakashi, and he inclines his head, just slightly. She smirks, and then addresses Shizune. “Please get me Naruto, Sakura and…” She stares at the folder for a moment, grimacing. “And Hinata.”

Shizune nods, and the door closes, and Kakashi frowns. “Not Sai?”

Tsunade weighs her head. “Let’s include him in your team first before we throw them into a mission, wholly unprepared as they are, after not having fought together the last two years. And we don’t know why the elders want him on your team either. So… Maybe you can take him along if they need help?”

Kakashi inclines his head. “Good idea.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kakashi stares up at the flying castle, explosions of rasengans lighting it up, destroying it, blowing it to fucking smithereens.

 

Kakashi’s voice is dry, with a sidelong glance at Gamabunta. “Now he’s just showing off.” He crosses his arms. “And he's not stopping is he?" Naruto, you’re overdoing it. It’s enough.

Sai’s voice is too light, bitingly sweet. ”Because he's stupid." Kakashi quirks his eyebrow, vaguely annoyed he did indeed bring Sai along. Oh you’re going to be fun to have around. He smirks softly, but just a little bit grimly.

Shino sighs, standing next to Kakashi. “It's coming straight for us." 

Shikamaru sighs, too, bending down a bit from where he’s sitting on the rock next to them to catch Kakashi’s gaze.” We should probably run for it.”

Shino hums. “Probably.”

 

No-one moves.

 

Kakashi grunts, eyeing the falling ship. Castle. Whatever.

There are more explosions, and then debris starts dropping and he tilts his head with a little sigh, and they jump back to the cliff after all, settling under a slightly overhanging piece of rock.

Above, Tenzou, Sakura, Choji and Neji show up just as the last falling pieces hit the ground, staring at the burning castle still falling towards the horizon. 

Neji clicks his tongue. “So… did you see anyone? Need help?”

Shikamaru sighs, elbows behind his head. “Yeah, well, no, no need to waste your chakra on this one.”

Kakashi snorts, tone beyond dry. “Oh yeah.” Indeed. He can see Jiraiya pretend to be annoyed and walking off to the side, settling down to read with his back turned. Gamabunta looks up at the sky and grins, hopping over to him. Kakashi tilts his head, looking back up at the castle as well, some vague nervosity fluttering in his stomach now. Where are you. Get down here.

Sai’s voice is dry, pointing. “There he is.”

Kakashi’s heart jumps. He scans for Naruto’s chakra, vaguely alarmed to see him fall so uncoordinatedly, but it’s there, low but there. Exhausted yourself, have you. He shoots a look at what’s left of the castle. Well, no surprise there.

Off to the side, Gamabunta rolls over, exposing his fat, soft, stomach. 

While Jiraiya turns a page in his book.

Something in Kakashi relaxes.

 

He watches Naruto fall into Gamabunta’s stomach as if into a sponge, the toad adjusting its position almost lazily to catch him. 

Shikamaru’s voice is soft, only for Kakashi to hear. “Well, I would say that was an impressive first mission.”

Kakashi pushes up just slowly, sharing a look with him, silently.

Indeed.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He tries to stay back, but Naruto is having none of it, flying to throw his arms around his neck as soon as he opens his eyes again. 

“Sensei! We did it!”

Kakashi chuckles, softly clapping his back, while trying not to hug back so hard. Not cling to him with every fiber of his being. You did. “I can see that.”

Naruto withdraws a bit, eyes glowing. “And I met Sasuke!”

Sudden silence, as the attention of all the people around them pretending not to watch snaps back to them. Jiraiya almost noisily turns another page of his book. 

Kakashi frowns. “Sasuke was here?”

Naruto nods a bit wildly, and then steps out of the embrace, and Kakashi misses him, immediately, dammit, craning his neck to look back at the dark cloud still hovering over the horizon. His teeth flash for a moment. “Yes, he helped me fight that monster, Reibi.” Naruto’s gaze returns to Kakashi’s, serious suddenly. “It’s like a bijou. It was used to power that thing. We overloaded it to defeat it.” Naruto’s teeth flash again, in a broad smile this time. “I told him I’d drag his sorry ass back.” He giggles, quirking an eyebrow at Kakashi. “And he said: ‘Are you threatening to cuddle me until I can’t breathe anymore like Kakashi did, too?’” 

A snort, somewhere behind them. Kakashi cannot tell by whom.

He knows that the tips of his ears are burning, the way that Naruto had said it making it seem like Kakashi only meant himself, personally. He clears his throat, trying to come up with a fitting reply, but Naruto’s eyes shift for a moment, only to return to his immediately, the expression on his face softening. “And I said: Yes.”

Kakashi exhales, carefully giving Naruto an eye-smile. He raises his eyebrows. “And then?”

Naruto shrugs. “He saved Hinata and the others. And then he gave me this mini smile… and then left.”

Not all is lost then. Kakashi inhales deeply, feeling the weight of Jiraiya’s gaze on them. He nods. “Alright. Do you know what he wanted there? I mean…” Orochimaru’s supposedly dead. What did you want from that doctor? Or the zero-tails bijou?

Naruto shrugs, grinning at Shikamaru, who slowly steps up to them. “I’m not sure. It seemed to me he wanted to know more about bijous. And he took the doctor with him.”

Kakashi frowns, staring at him. “I see.” Is that good? Or bad? What would Sasuke need a doctor for? 

Naruto nods. “Yeah. And there was this one comment from the doctor, he said something like, ‘you’re not coughing like your brother’.” He shrugs, blue eyes blinking up to Kakashi. “Sasuke stared at him weirdly, and I think that is when he decided to take him along.”

Kakashi tilts his head, shares a long look with Jiraiya. I see. Does he have a lead on Itachi?

 

Shikamaru interjects, quietly, tone laced with annoyance as usual, but also affection, warming something in Kakashi. “Nicely done, Naruto.”

Naruto grins, and then his stomach growls, loudly, and it triggers a gentle round of laughter.

Jiraiya’s voice comes, deliberately gruff. “Why don’t you all get off of Gamabunta’s stomach, and I have him hop us over and…” He grins softly, eyes sparkling now. “Invite you all to ramen.”

 

Naruto whoops, and Kakashi chuckles, gently.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

The locker room looks like it had back then, and the smell of it is rather similar, too.

Kakashi smirks, shaking his head softly, eying the clean little space. How often we came back here, bleeding and broken. He swallows.

He crosses his arms, leaning into the corner in a decidedly relaxed manner, when he feels the chakra.

Tenzou’s big, black eyes widen just a bit more when he sees him, a small smile on his lips. “Senpai.” He reaches for his locker room door. “It has been a while since you’ve been here.”

Kakashi hums. “Mhhh. Almost 10 years now.” He looks at Tenzou with a sidelong glance. “How is life under the new Godaime?”

Tenzou weighs his head. “Similar. Though her goals seem to be quite different.”

Kakashi nods, watching him take off the armor for a moment. 

Tenzou shoots him a look. “Why are you here, now?” He smirks. “I mean, we did see each other and talked a bit last week, when the daimyo visited?”

Kakashi snorts. “Yeah, but I wouldn’t call that talking.” He grimaces. That had been politics. Politics that Tsunade had insisted he attend with her. He clears his throat. “No, I wanted to talk with you about team 7.” He pauses, frowning. “I mean, you… know of the significance of it for me.” Of him. “You’ve been in this mess with me, almost since the start.”

Tenzou hums, taking a jonin vest out of his locker. “And I caught the little rascal, too, quite often.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “You did?” So it had been you, as I suspected.

Tenzou smirks. “I often assigned myself to the shifts to have an eye on him.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “It was one of the few things I could do for you to thank you for saving me.”

Kakashi swallows, harshly. “I need to thank you, then.”

Tenzou shakes his head. “No.” He sighs softly, and then changes the subject, just slightly. “The Godaime has informed me that I will be your replacement for the team, if you should drop out for any reason.”

Kakashi nods. “Yeah.” He sighs. “About that.” 

Tenzou shoots him a look.

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Be prepared to subdue the fox with several tails… bleeding out.”

Tenzou stares at him, for a a long few seconds. “Bleeding out?” Kakashi nods and Tenzou frowns. “How many.”

Kakashi sighs. “Four is a high possibility.” He grimaces. “For your information, at that level Naruto almost killed Jiraiya.”

Tenzou stares at him, and then tilts his head, with a bit of a grimace, too. “I see.” He blinks. “And yet she is planning on sending him out alone?”

Kakashi grimaces, logically concurring, while emotionally rallying against the point. “He is no prisoner.” He closes his eyes for a moment. “Besides. I don’t think we could actually imprison him.”

Tenzou closes the locker door, tone thoughtful. “Only the jutsu of Hōzuki Castle commander Mui probably has a chance there. His blood prison jutsu is said to bind anyone.”

Kakashi grimaces, remembering when the Sandaime had used that particular jutsu on him. “That’s true.” He sighs, deeply. “Still. You might wish to look into what version of your wood release will work.”

Tenzou hums, nodding. He shoots a look at Kakashi. “What will you use, Senpai?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Seals I got from Jiraiya. He’ll probably give some to you, too, just in case.”

Tenzou exhales, leaning against the locker, arms crossed. “You really think you’ll drop out at some point?”

Kakashi shrugs, with a sigh. “We are about to butt heads with the Akatsuki. If they really are the level we expect them to be…” He grimaces. And I know they are. “Then we will have to engage them with no restraints. Given my special power, and even though I did train it, the chance is rather high that I will need to recuperate at some point. As you may remember.”

Tenzou exhales, and then smiles, softly. “It is weird seeing you with it covered, you know?”

Kakashi snorts. “Yeah well, covering it keeps me on my own two feet.” Though the drain has lessened through the training.

Tenzou chuckles, and then winks at him. “I bet the hospital staff is missing you though. Especially the nurses.”

Kakashi snorts again, and then chuckles, with a blush. “Ha ha.” He sobers slowly, and then shrugs, his voice reflecting his sincerity. “There is no-one I trust more with my team. I hope you know that.”

Tenzou swallows, blinking rapidly. “I… thank you, Senpai.”

Kakashi nods, and then clears his throat. “Want to grab something to eat?”

Tenzou colors, immediately, deeply. He stammers. “I… cannot, I mean… I’m sorry Senpai, I…”

Kakashi blinks, and then tilts his head, trying to understand. “You don’t want to… go for dinner with me?”

Tenzou blushes even more, rapidly shaking his head. “No, that’s not it, forgive me, Senpai, it’s just…”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, prompting, vaguely peeved. “Yes?”

Tenzou clears his throat, the words rushed. “Ihaveadate.”

Kakashi blinks again, slowly. “You have a date.” Tenzou nods. Kakashi shakes his head. “So… why don’t you just say so? I mean, there’s nothing to be sorry about?”

Tenzou fidgets. “Yeah, I mean, it’s still very much in the early stages, and we are still wondering where it goes, and want to keep it quiet, and…” He sighs, deeply, some of his countenance returning. “I just feel bad, because you cannot?”

Kakashi stares at him, for a long, long moment.

And then he steps forward, and pulls Tenzou into a quick hug. “Don’t be. Enjoy life.” He tilts his head, clasping Tenzou’s shoulder for a moment, with a chuckle. “Go. Don’t keep them waiting.”

Tenzou inclines his head, a vague blush back on his cheeks. “Thank you, Senpai.”

And he’s gone.

 

Kakashi sighs, leaning against the lockers for a long moment, and then he chuckles again, shaking his head. The little boy, all grown up. Imagine that.

He snorts, and then sobers.

 

Time flies.

 

He quirks an eyebrow, realizing Tenzou‘s tattoo had been red, still. 

Huh. I wonder who it is.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

The report of the priest’s prophecy and the fight happening at the shrine reaches him while he trains with Guy. 

Guy looks up at him, and nods, and they’re off, Shikamaru and Temari following them, rushing towards the mountains they know the shrine Mōryō's body is kept.

Kakashi knows they’ll need a few hours only, but he’s still nervous, grimly keeping a harsh pace.

He doesn’t dare to think about it. 

 

They drop down onto the stone army threatening Naruto like some avengers, driving them off, buying him time.

It’s almost a pleasure to use chidori on them.

No blood and bone around my wrist.

 

Only stone and gravel.

He watches Naruto disappear in the mountain, his heart beating in his throat.

Guy’s gaze is dark, and too understanding.

 

Kakashi jumps up, and punches another chidori through granite, forcing the terror down.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He’s dead on his feet, quite exhausted after using too many chidoris, but he pretends to be alright, relaxed, standing next to Lee and Sakura and Guy, watching Naruto talk to the priestess. 

Who is obviously quite smitten with Naruto. 

And who is not making any secret of it.

 

Kakashi’s gaze drifts over to Naruto for a moment, wondering if he sees it. Can see it.

And if he does - what does he see when he looks at me?

He sighs, crossing his arms.

 

Shion’s eyes are large, and lilac, very close to a Hyuuga’s, and Kakashi wonders if that is where some of her powers stem from. But the hair color is very different. He sighs again, quietly, trying to actually listen to what she says. 

 

“And my power must be passed on to the next priestess.”

 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. Generational transmission. A kekkei genkai then. Probably centered in the eyes after all. She’s only 16 though, it’s a bit early for her to give up her position. Then again, it‘ll take a while for a child to grow to be old enough to succeed her. 

 

Shion continues, her voice lively, and cheerful. “What do you say, Naruto. Will you help me?”

The words take a moment to reach Kakashi’s brain, but when they do it’s with a jolt of electricity that puts chidori to shame. Did she just….

He stares, as Naruto turns to her, giving her a thumbs up and a big smile, and…

“Sure! I’ll do whatever it takes.”

Kakashi’s mouth drops open, and he feels Lee and Sakura wheeze, while Guy is silent, for once, staring. 

Shion blushes, just softly.

And Naruto… smirks at her.

 

What the…

 

Kakashi blinks, mentally regrouping. He’s almost 16, Jiraiya said he’s not as naive as he likes to pretend, I mean, look at the sexy jutsu, but this…. 

He opens his mouth, wanting to order them to return home, but Shion is faster.

“I invite you to celebrate the success of the mission. Please follow me.”

 

Kakashi grimaces. “We really should return to Konoha.”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, his blue eyes boring into Kakashi’s. He tries not to fidget under the stare. 

Shion raises her chin. “I insist. Besides, someone still has to escort me back.” She looks up at Naruto for a moment, and they share a smile.

Kakashi inclines his head, clearing his throat, stomping on the instant ire that wants to rise. “As you wish, Shion-sama.” He smiles a bit to himself. But you’ll have to take us all along for the party. “We will all accompany you then.”

Her face falls a bit, but she sniffs, turning to the road with a nod.

Naruto shrugs, winking at Kakashi. “Off to the party then!”

 

Kakashi tilts his head, and shoots him a withering look, and Naruto… grins.

 

Oh boy.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He’s made sure they would all sleep together in one of the guest houses.

Put his own mat between the door and the other futons, even.

 

Shion has been flirting with Naruto all evening, and Sakura has stared, almost rudely, over the rim of the cup she hides her blush behind.

Lee has stared also, quite rudely, and also blushing. Not behind a cup.

If Kakashi were to guess, he’d say the boy was quite smitten with Shion.

He shares a look with Guy, who is trying not to stare. And then raises his gaze to the surrounding towns people, smiling and fawning over Shion and Naruto. Encouraging.

The thought is a bit glum. They want this to happen. He fidgets, the headache throbbing behind his temple intensifying. I… should I intervene? Must I intervene? Should I not? What is my reluctance based on? My own experience? His age? Her age? Our… bond? My longing? 

Their traditions? 

 

Dammit.

 

He grimaces, rubbing his forehead. When he looks up, Naruto is staring at him. 

Kakashi exhales, and then gives him an eye-smile that hurts because it is so fake. 

Naruto blinks, eyes narrowing a bit. 

 

And then he puts his hand on Shion’s arm for a moment, and leans in to whisper something to her, making her giggle, and then shuffles over, up to Kakashi.

Kakashi unclenches his jaw with an effort, and turns to face him.

Naruto blinks, his big blue eyes staring into Kakashi’s. His voice is a whisper, just for them. “Sensei… are you ok?”

Kakashi grimaces, and then sighs, deliberately. “Mah, why wouldn’t I be?” Yeah, why. He scoffs, quietly.

Naruto tilts his head. “I… do you mind?” He licks his lips. “I mean, Shion’s invitation?”

Yes. Kakashi very carefully swallows the word down. His voice is gruff. “Why would I?” And you don’t even need to use protection. He reaches for his glass, glad when his hand is steady.

Naruto is silent for a moment. “If I follow her invitation it will be an honor and strengthen the relations to Konoha.”

Kakashi shifts slightly, taking a sip of his sake. “I know.” I know, dammit. He closes his eyes for a long moment, and then decides to be the good, sensible, responsible and aloof Sensei. “Is this something you want? If not I could order you to return to the guest house with us.” 

Please.

Naruto looks away for a moment, and then over to Shion. He blushes softly. “I don’t know… I mean.” He looks up at Kakashi. “I really like her eyes.” His tone is a bit breathless, and it tears at Kakashi. “She smells real nice, too.”

Kakashi clears his throat, feeling the weight of Guy’s gaze. He is silent for a long moment, trying to find the right words, and then sighs, defeatedly, settling on a lame: “You should do what your gut tells you.”

Naruto ducks his head, and then blushes deeply, and Kakashi gives him another fake eye-smile, hoping against all hope that Naruto will buy it. “It’ll be fine.” I’ll… survive. He swallows, harshly. 

Naruto clears his throat, too. “It’s just that… ever since… that town we went to…” He trails off, and then bravely raises his eyes to Kakashi. His voice drops even more, and Kakashi has to strain to hear him. “I have this brand new awareness somehow… I mean, I knew how to use the sexy jutsu, but now…”

Kakashi swallows, closing his eyes for a moment. Dropping his voice to match Naruto’s tone. “Now you know what it means.”

Their eyes lock for a long, long moment. Kakashi watches the blush deepen, watches as Naruto’s eyes dilate. 

He tears his gaze away, taking another sip from his sake. The thought is bitter. I must not take the experience from him. Must. Not. He clears his throat, pressing the words out despite the pain in his gut. “Go, if you want. Find out. If you’re alright with the possible consequences.”

Naruto blinks. And then shrugs, and smiles, softly. “Alright.”

 

And he shuffles back to her, giving her a brilliant smile.

 

Kakashi refills his glass.

 

Sometime during the evening, Guy clasps his shoulder, in silent support.

Sakura retires early. 

Guy drags Lee back to the guest house.

Kakashi drags himself there, too, by sheer will.

 

 

He stares at the empty futon next to his, remembering all the instances when Naruto had flung his arm out and onto his. 

 

He falls asleep to the phantom scent of Naruto’s skin, yearning, terribly.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

There is a hickey on Naruto’s throat.

For a while.

 

Kakashi stares at it while they rush through the trees, watches it fade after a few miles. The skin looks unmarred now, once more, untouched, but he knows it is not, and he cannot place the feeling, something in him churning. 

 

Naruto also looks quite tired… and he glows. 

 

Kakashi wants to wipe it off. Scratch it off. Rip it off.

Now.

 

He falls back a bit, furious at himself.

Guy closes up to him, silent for long minutes. When he speaks, his voice is low, only for Kakashi. “I am proud of you, my rival.”

Kakashi snorts. “Yeah, well, look at me, the responsible Sensei, letting his underage student have sex.”

Guy smiles at him. “Look at you, the boy’s soul mate, letting him make his own experiences. And strengthen the political ties with the Land of Demons.” He shoots Kakashi a look, tilting an eyebrow at his frown. “Of course I know of your willful battle with the goddess of fate.” Guy looks up at the heavens, eyes tearing up. “To know you have already found the love of your life is such beauty, it has made me cry for you so often.” He sniffs.

Kakashi grimaces, shooting a look up at the love of his life jumping through the trees in front of him. “Yeah, well, it’s not as much fun as it sounds.”

Guy chuckles. “All good things take time. I wasn’t able to master the gates without it either.”

Kakashi’s tone is caustic. “But allowing them fully, opening yourself will kill you.” And opening myself…

Guy smiles at him, sharply. “But what a way it would be to go.”

Kakashi swallows, reaching over to squeeze Guy’s shoulder for a moment. “Let’s hope it never comes to that.”

Guy quirks an eyebrow. “Would you not want to see it?”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, and then squeezes again. “Ok, let’s make a deal. If you ever open them, you must make sure that I can witness.” His voice drops to a whisper. “I have to be there.” At least. And I will try to stop you. Save you.

Guy smiles, broadly. “Deal.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi wanders through Konoha, nose in book, totally unrelatedly following glimpses of a blue scarf.

He knows from Asuma that Konohamaru has been ecstatic over Naruto’s return.

He also knows that Naruto and Konohamaru still spend time together, whenever they can. 

Asuma had smiled broadly, when he told Kakashi that Konohamaru sees Naruto as a brother. Elbowing Kakashi into the side. “Mhh, looks like we’ll be family, hmm?”

Kurenai had snickered. 

 

He’s now following the boy run out into the woods, the blue scarf trailing behind him. He could scan for the chakra signatures, of course. But where would be the fun in that. He smirks softly, carefully picking his way through the foliage. 

He can hear Naruto and Konohamaru yell at each other, the latter rather indignantly. 

Kakashi smirks, glimpsing around a tree. 

 

And then he starts, his mouth dropping open. 

He’s teaching him… rasengan?

 

He had expected the boys to be in henge, maybe. But this? 

He watches as Konohamaru bites his tongue, trying to collect the chakra into his palm. 

Kakashi looks over at Naruto, watches as the eyes glow watching Konohamaru. 

 

Her low voice startles him, he is so deeply concentrated on them. “Watching him teach his skills so freely to others is a great pleasure.”

Kakashi tilts his head, catches her hazel eyes for a moment. “Not many would give out knowledge about a level A jutsu this freely, true.” He sighs softly, through his nose. “And especially this one.”

She hums, leaning against the tree behind him. “Though he does not know of its significance, of course.”

Kakashi grimaces, turning from watching Naruto and Konohamaru to face her. “No.” He frowns, his voice dropping to a whisper. “His nescience of his heritage is a rather great pain to me, as you know.”

She hums, nodding once. “I am aware. But Kakashi, ignorance can be a bliss.” She chuckles softly. “And I bet he would have put two and two together already if the stone heads were colored… he spends a lot of time on the Yondaime’s head.” She smirks. “Must be some instinct.”

Kakashi snorts. “He once told me that he liked it because it has the same spiky hair.”

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow. “As I said.” She clicks her tongue. “You probably noticed that I have put up frames in the office.” She shoots him a look. “And left them empty for now.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “You want to put up images of the Hokages?”

Tsunade nods. “Yes.” She smiles as Konohamaru yells in frustration, a balloon popping behind them in the clearing. “But I will wait to do so until either your seal has released or he has found out himself.” She frowns. “I feel…” She hisses, grimacing. “It would be too much onto the nose, you know?” She shrugs. “I mean, it’s been right in front of his nose, and hidden, deliberately, and then putting up Minato’s image would be like… pushing his nose to it and calling him stupid.” She clears her throat. “He is growing up to be his spitting image. If he’d grow bangs. And with whiskers. Still.”

Kakashi clears his throat as well, crossing his arms. Unwilling to really comment. “Yeah.”

Tsunade grins at him. “Why don’t you pick a photo of Minato for the frame, hmm? I heard you got photos from Sora-san.”

Kakashi stares at her, and then shakes his head. “Only old photos though. Nothing that can serve as an official portrait.” He frowns. “But there should be, right? I mean, there are official photos that were done?”

Tsunade nods, and then shrugs. Pulling a face with a grin. “Yeah, but they’re so… stiff.”

Kakashi chuckles. “On purpose I believe?”

 

Tsunade rolls her eyes, with a groan. “Oh, not you, too. Shizune has been telling me to suck it up and go wear the robes…” She grimaces. “But I don’t want to.”

Kakashi weighs his head. “They’re nice to hide in?”

Tsunade snorts. “Oh yes.” She clicks her tongue. “I bet you’d love them.” Kakashi blinks decidedly innocently, and Tsunade chuckles, continuing. “But I don’t want to hide behind the status. Or in the status. I want to be in their face, and want them to acknowledge me.” Her eyes sparkle, with fire. “I want to be the healer that led the Land of Fire.”

Kakashi smirks. “And you are.” He hesitates a moment. “Thank you for taking the way of healing, and not the one of revenge.”

Tsunade weighs her head. “I believe the clans we took out would see this differently.”

Kakashi nods, and then tilts his head at the two boys behind them. “Still. If you’d gone after Sunagakure, we might be at war right now.” He swallows. 

Tsunade sighs, and then nods. “Possibly. But not going down that path was only possible because Sunagakure gave us the opening.”

Kakashi exhales, in a rush. And they only did that because Naruto changed Gaara’s heart. “I know.” He waits a moment, and then locks their gazes. “Why are you here, Godaime?”

Tsunade smirks, shaking her head. “Ahhh, a shame I cannot hide from you.”

He quirks an eyebrow. 

She grins, but the smile drops off her face when she continues. “Well, it’s actually to do with Sunagakure. We received word that Gaara has been abducted by the Akatsuki. There was a huge fight at Sunagakure. His brother Kankuro has vanished as well.” She grimaces, staring into space, unseeing. Her tone changes, just slightly. “I want you to take Naruto and Sakura and go to Sunagakure to help find them. Pick up their sister Temari on the way, she left yesterday and doesn’t know of the events yet.”

Kakashi hums. “We’ll depart right away.” He hesitates, and adds, with a soft smile. “Though it is a shame to interrupt their training.”

Tsunade clicks her tongue, pointing her chin. “They’ve switched to the sexy jutsu though, so it might not be as bad.”

Kakashi’s head swivels round. “Oh for…” He shakes his head.

Tsunade puts her hand onto his back for a short moment. “Please make sure to bring the Kazekage back home. We need them as allies. We need this peace.” 

And she’s gone.

 

Kakashi exhales, watching bombshell brunette prancing around with lithe bombshell blonde for a moment. Wasting time on this ridiculous jutsu. 

 

In this time of peace.

 

Kakashi shakes his head, once. 

I will try to keep it. For you.

 

 

 

 

Notes:

Where I’m from it’s perfectly normal for teenagers that age to “dip” their feet in with consenting others their age. Given the insinuations of canon… I felt it valid.

Chapter 25: Cloak of acid and pain

Notes:

I’m not going to follow all of Shippuden, just some (for me) key scenes, while expanding on what we didn’t get to see. :)

 

And: The Kazekage arc shows the shadow clones reacting to Naruto’s status, feel some of what he feels… which I found interesting.  So I’m using that^^.

Also changing the hospital stay, just a bit, despite the cute scene with Asuma and his team there :). And if you know Shippuden by heart you will notice that the referred-to interactions/run-ins with Orochimaru are just vaguely different, on purpose. 

Chapter Text

 

 

 

Naruto is racing along the thick roots before him, not listening for Kakashi’s calls to slow down.

There’s chakra there that Kakashi knows, and he grimaces, secretly checking for the seals in his vest’s pockets.

Naruto not listening to him but following his own instincts is nothing new, not really, and so Kakashi just sighs, deeply, while keeping track of that flying, birdlike whatever the Akatsuki called Deidara has conjured.

And which has Gaara in its beak.

Gaara, after whom Naruto races. Almost blindly.

 

Kakashi frowns, trying to imagine the deep connection the two… jinchurikis must have forged in that single fight they had, almost three years ago. 

He knows from Iruka that Naruto had felt for Gaara, deeply.

He knows from Naruto that he had been proud to have helped Gaara, then.

He can see that this is personal for Naruto. Very personal.

 

He grimaces.

I can only imagine how it must be to be targeted for a thing they had no saying in carrying. At least I am in various bingo books because of what I have done… not who I was forced to be. Eye or not. And now… we know that the Akatsuki do not give a damn about the vessel either.

He shoots a look at the orange black boy racing in front of him - a vessel created by his father, just like Gaara - a pain in his chest. Trying to imagine… and failing. I cannot possibly imagine losing you. It just doesn’t… He swallows, and turns his thoughts to the here and now, with an effort.

I have to stop this before he utilizes too much of the fox’s chakra.

He smirks grimly, allowing the thought. Time to use the enemy’s weapon against them.

 

He concentrates, his red eye focusing on the blond figure flying high above.

He lets the longing and intent come, like a whisper, that rises in intensity, growing to the sea’s turmoil in a thunderstorm, and then pushes it at Deidara, trying to aim for his chest. 

A sharp pain in his eye, and Kakashi gasps, losing focus for a moment. Damn. He clenches his teeth. Again. This time, he manages to bring the swirl, the door right into space, and right at Deidara’s arm. 

There is a moment of nothing, of a throb, as part of the arm is swallowed up.

The flying thing tumbles, as Deidara loses his focus and balance.

 

A rasengan flares up, and something black and orange and furious beheads the thing, shadow clones racing to check the beak.

Kakashi grimaces, holding a hand to his hurting eye. “Naruto!” Dammit.

There is a moment of nothing, as two shadow clones pull a lifeless body from the beak. 

 

And then a burst of anger from Naruto. And red chakra, enveloping him, like a cloak. 

There is another shadow clone next to Kakashi that goes: “Uh oh.”

Kakashi blinks, shooting it a somewhat bewildered look. What the hell. His eyes return to the figure of Naruto, who has fallen to all fours, and whose nails are claws now, and there are fangs, matching the red, slitted eyes nicely. 

And a tail, swishing in the air. 

So that is the tailed-beasts chakra cloak Jiraiya warned me about. Dammit. 

He grimaces, watching the red eyes scan the foliage. Searching for Deidara. Ignoring him. He sighs. I should subdue him. He shoots a look at the shadow clone next to him, and at the ones holding Gaara. But he seems to be in control still. The shadow clones are still there, and seem stable. And he’s not coming for me. The clone next to him shivers. Kakashi frowns. And then he leans in to the shadow clone next to him, whispering on a whim. “How does it feel?”

Shadow-Naruto licks his lips, his answer curt. “Hot.”

Kakashi looks at him, from the corner of his eyes. Wondering. “What is he thinking? Do you know?”

Shadow-Naruto weighs his head. “The prevalent emotion is hate right now. But it’s not general, it’s very specific.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “He really wants that Akatsuki’s hide.”

Kakashi hums, nodding. “How does he try to find him?”

Shadow-Naruto grimaces. “Right now, he’s trying to catch his scent. If that fails…”

Kakashi pulls a face, finishing the sentence. “He’ll probably go onto a rampage.”

Shadow-Naruto nods. “Yes. But he wants me to stay with you.”

Kakashi blinks, and looks at him. “Protecting me?” There is something in his stomach that flutters.

Shadow-Naruto shrugs, nodding again. “Yes.”

Kakashi looks down at the swishing tail once more. So there really is thought still underneath the rage. He sighs softly, resolving to watch for now. “I might still need to interfere… when he loses control of you.”

Shadow-Naruto nods glumly.

Down in the clearing Naruto clenches his claws, drawing them through bark with a sound that shivers. The coat bubbles and the Shadow-Naruto grimaces again, moaning as he holds his head. Kakashi watches in alert as another tail forms, slowly, deliberately, somehow deep down knowing that Naruto allows it to unfold, allows the rage to consume him.

The Shadow-Naruto next to him whimpers, holding its head. 

Kakashi shoots it a look. “How does it feel now?”

Shadow-Naruto shakes his head, eyes squeezed shut, and tears falling from it. “It hurts.”

Kakashi blinks, remembering the corrosive attributes of the cloak Jiraiya had talked about. A cloak made up from chakra and pain. Up on the branches the other two shadow clones shake and moan, but still hold onto Gaara.

And they’re still not dispelled. Meaning he’s still in control. Kakashi smirks grimly, watching as the bubbling rage impersonated lays down a swathe of destruction, only to return, seething. But he won’t be able to draw someone like Deidara out by just running around. Kakashi frowns. And he knows that, too. That’s why he isn’t raging more.

Kakashi licks his lips, shooting the Shadow-Naruto next to him another look. Are you able to suppress the chakra easily now? Or will it rob you of your remaining strength? Shadow-Naruto bends down with a moan, quivering now, and Kakashi hisses, annoyed. The latter, I gather. And we cannot have that. He pulls out one of the seals on little pieces of paper that Jiraiya gave him, reaching up to squeeze the shadow clone’s shoulder. 

And then he jumps down, crouching in front of Naruto for a moment.

 

A moment that feels like an eternity.

 

Up close the changes look even more spooky.

The eyes are red and slitted and glittering, and the whiskers more pronounced, standing out. The hair seems thicker and the fingernails are sharp, digging into the wood of the stump Naruto is crouching on. The mouth is slightly open, allowing the teeth to be seen, the fangs elongated, the other teeth sharp. And he’s growling.

Kakashi frowns. The genetics adaption must run deeper than we thought. While there are lots of reports of jinchuriki changing into the bijou they carry this… is different. This is not only the cloak either. This is him mixed with the fox. Mixing it IN. He sighs softly, and then reaches up, and gently and yet swiftly puts the seal onto Naruto’s forehead, right under the headband, between his eyes. 

The chakra cloak burns his skin, like acid.

Their eyes meet, just as thankfulness enters the red eyes. 

And Naruto falls into his arms, with a sigh. “Sensei.”

 

For a long moment, Kakashi just closes his eyes.

And holds him.

 

Naruto tilts his head into his neck, with a sigh.

 

The moment breaks, as Guy and his team arrive, looking mightily done, after having to defeat copies of themselves. Kakashi almost snorts. I bet that was a pain in the ass. He and Guy exchange a short look, as Tenten inhales sharply, having spotted the dead Kazekage.

Neji’s voice is soft, almost inaudible. “He’s watching us.” He hesitates. “But he’s created chakra echoes of himself. I cannot pinpoint him.”

Kakashi nods, slowly releasing Naruto and rubbing his hand, where it had touched the cloak. He looks down at it for a moment, realizing he cannot even see anything. But it hurts quite a lot. I bet you must hurt all over now. He watches Naruto smile at his friends and colleagues, not giving any sign. It seems that you’re used to a lot of pain. The thought is very bitter.

He clears his throat, making his voice heard. “He fled.”

He and Guy share a look. With a little luck, this should trigger him to make his move. Kakashi exhales, looking up at the shadow clones holding the body. “We will set up camp and then…” He trails off as Sakura and Chiyoh arrive, the latter being half carried by Sakura. 

Sakura’s big green eyes are tired, but clear. “Sensei.” She shoots a look up at the branches. “Oh no.”

 

Something tickles Kakashi’s senses, and Guy gasps, turning to it, and there is something swishing through the air, and Neji exclaims, loudly, wordlessly, and there’s the swish of Tenten’s scroll, and Lee shifts into stance, but it will be too late, won’t it, it will kill him, it will kill them, and that cannot be, it must not be, and Kakashi grimaces, aiming with all his being.

 

With all the desperation he feels.

All the resolve.

 

And kamui swallows the explosion up. 

Punches it out of space.

 

Obediently.

 

For  a moment, Kakashi feels as if he is being watched.

 

He falls to the ground, holding his eye, blood dripping through his fingers. The feeling fades, with the pain that rises. And the exhaustion. 

He gasps, silently.

 

Neji stares at the remains of smoke in the air, his tone carrying his astonishment. “What… just happened?”

Kakashi grits his teeth. “I sent the explosion to another dimension.” I think.

Guy looks at him. “Another dimension?” 

Kakashi nods, and then hisses again, as another lance of pain pierces his nerves.

Sakura rushes to his side, green chakra glowing, and he feels Naruto hover close, too.

Kakashi reaches back with his free hand, squeezing Sakura’s shoulder. “Sakura-chan, don’t waste too much chakra on me. We have to find a way to save Gaara.”

 

Chiyoh’s voice is dark. “He’s dead. Use all the chakra you need.”

Sakura’s head swivels around, just as Naruto exclaims, loudly. Desperately. “There must be a way!”

Chiyoh sighs, with a smile. “Maybe. It does not depend on her chakra though.” She nods at Kakashi. “And he needs to be able to return home.”

Sakura looks up to her, and then concentrates on muting the pain again, and replenishing some of his chakra reserves. 

Naruto hovers close for a moment longer, and then stands up, his face pinched. “Is he still out there?”

Neji activates his byakugan, scanning the area. “No. All the chakra signatures are gone. I bet he thought our death was a given.”

Tenten grimaces. “If Sensei Kakashi hadn’t contained the explosion it would have been.”

Guy nods, raising his fist. “Ah, such pleasure to see my eternal rival master his powers.”

Kakashi glowers at him, from one eye, on principle. 

Naruto’s voice is quiet. Intense. “We have to save Gaara.” 

Everyone quiets and turns to him, watching Naruto stare at Gaara’s limp form.

Naruto raises his eyes to Kakashi, and then to Chiyoh. “Is there really nothing we can do?” He points a shaking finger, voice rising. “You said there was something you could do?”

Chiyoh sighs, tiredly, and somehow Kakashi knows, on some kind of level. He shares a look with her. Shares a look that transcends their ages, sharing awareness, and hope.

Hope that is worth a sacrifice.

 

Chiyoh blinks and breaks their gaze, and then smiles, softly, and beckons for Naruto. “Come. I will need your help. Let us save him.”

 

 

Kakashi exhales, watching her go, feeling like crying.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi watches as Gaara makes Naruto shake his hand with the sand guiding it, as equals, the black-lined green eyes carrying tragedy, and relief, and resolve, and hope, and sorrow, and exhaustion, and… life. 

Kakashi blinks, turning his gaze to Naruto, who is blushing just softly. Kakashi smirks, realizing he’s not even jealous, somehow. So, feeling attracted to Gaara, too? He quirks an eyebrow, looking away for a moment. It seems you don’t really care for gender or status, or anything like that. He shakes his head, minutely. But I already knew that - you see the soul, after all. He grimaces, the thought glum. Whyever you’d like mine then.

 

Naruto’s blue eyes blink up to him, pulling him from his thoughts, and Kakashi smirks, softly. Helplessly. “Ready to go home?”

Naruto nods, with a broad smile. “Yes, Sensei.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He’s actually quite proud he makes it into the hospital at least. 

He would have preferred to collapse on the bed though, not in front of it. Oh well. You can’t have it all. 

Tsunade’s grip hurts where she drags him onto the bed, obviously with some kind of instinct already knowing he is not that badly hurt, just exhausted. 

Her voice is somewhat amused. “Welcome back, Hatake Kakashi. We kept your bed ready.”

He grunts, shooting her a skunk-eye. “Ha ha.”

She chuckles, while shooing all the others out of the room. Naruto is the last to go, his big blue eyes riveted to Kakashi, worried. 

She sighs, clasping his shoulder for a moment. “Easy Naruto. He will be fine. Why don’t you go and clean up, and then have some food, hmm?”

He glances at her, and then sighs, defeatedly, with a shrug. “Okay.”

She calls after him, tone definitely amused. “Report tomorrow at 8am. And go and invite Sakura and Sensei Iruka for ramen as well, she’s made it possible for Kakashi to return home and he’s been taking care of your plants once more.” She closes the door, chuckling, to his indignant pout, and the words ‘but why do I always have to pay?’ and then returns to Kakashi’s bed, letting her hand hover over his upper body for a moment. “I see Sakura gave you chakra… that has now run out.”

Kakashi clears his throat, feeling darkness drenched exhaustion pull at his limbs. “Yes. I had to use kamui to… transfer an explosion.”

She quirks an eyebrow, while starting to unclasp his vest, swatting his fingers away when he tries to help. “I see. So you have been able to trigger it properly?”

Kakashi grunts, shifting when she pulls the vest off. “Yes. I guess I was emotionally invested enough.” He looks up at her. “My team and Guy’s team were there… we’d be dead now if it hadn’t worked.”

She hums, moving down to pull his shoes off. “Emotional incentives are important. Especially with the sharingan as we know.” 

Kakashi nods. “Yeah. But it was even more draining than anything I’d experienced before.”

Tsunade shrugs. “At first it will be, I believe, as with every other new skill.” She shoots him a look. “But it will get better soon - at least if you’re not falling back into repressing your emotions again.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes.

She grins, and then sobers, her tone reflecting her sincerity. “I’m glad you managed to save the Kazekage.” She looks out the window for a moment. “Otherwise this peace would have been very brittle.” She grimaces. “It actually already is. The history is always there, threatening.” She shrugs. “But at least there’s hope now. Again.”

Kakashi blinks, feeling Tsunade pull off his garments now, his limbs growing unresponsive. He knows she can understand him, even though it feels like he’s slurring. “I only need some rest. And then…”

She hums, pulling the sheet up over him. “We’ll talk when you’ve woken up again. Relax.” She squeezes his arm for a moment, as his breath deepens. “They’re all safe.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto is there, reading Icha Icha Paradise, when he wakes up.

Kakashi has half the mind to yell at him, again, but then on the other hand… that would be hypocritical, wouldn’t it. Especially given the fact that he knows them already. And has had sex.

Naruto frowns, turning the page, and Kakashi watches him, trying to gauge what exactly made him frown. Is it something you haven’t experienced yet? Is it a characterization you don’t find fitting? Is it something you find gross? He shifts, trying to see what page Naruto is on, and Naruto’s eyes snap to him, the book closing with a snap.

Dammit.

 

“Sensei!”

Kakashi grins, helplessly, knowing it must transmit, because suddenly Naruto has him in a tight embrace, holding very close for a few seconds.

Kakashi hums, and then tilts his head to push his nose into the smell, almost guilt-free, trying to simply enjoy what he is offered. For a moment, Naruto’s warm breath puffs against his skin, warms his soul.

And then Naruto withdraws, gently, slowly, making it very sure this is no rejection. He hovers close, looking down on him.

Kakashi clears his throat, quirks an eyebrow. “So. Reading Icha Icha?”

Naruto snickers, and then shrugs. “Yeah, Ero-Sennin brought it for you while you were still out, he’ll be back later.”

Kakashi nods, and then has to ask, unable to help himself. “What had you frowning there just now?”

Naruto blinks and then he laughs, a startled little laugh, coming with a deep blush. “Oh that.” He clears his throat. “Just that description of the feeling of Yuki’s hair… you know?” He scratches his head, blushing even more. “I… kinda compared it mentally to what I…” He hesitates, but finishes bravely after a moment. “…know.”

Kakashi stares at him, and then looks away for a moment, trying to remember, and then he blushes too, also remembering that that hair wasn’t the only hair talked about. He clears his throat again, willing his ears to stop burning. “Ah.” Oh god, sorry I asked. He grimaces.

Naruto shuffles on his feet. “Yeah.”

 

They’re both silent for a moment, trying to dig themselves out of the emotional embarrassment pit. 

 

Naruto nods at his hand, after a few seconds, tone carefully chipper. “So, Sensei, I didn’t know you hurt your hand?”

Kakashi raises his wrapped right hand, glad for the change of subject, but frowning when he looks up at Naruto. “You don’t remember?”

Naruto hesitates, and then shakes his head, with a sigh. “Oh. I see. No, I don’t remember, but since there were kage bunshin active I kind of second hand remember, you know?” He winces. “I wasn’t aware touching me hurt you this bad.”

Kakashi waves him off. “And it is nothing, Naruto. I just don’t heal as fast as you do.”

Naruto grimaces, looking away for a moment. His voice sounds haunted. “Yeah.”

Kakashi reaches for his hand with his bandaged one, tugging on it. “I’m serious.” 

Naruto nods, and then exhales, giving him a small smile. “Still. I know how it burns. I’m sorry you have to go through that.”

Kakashi squeezes his hand. “The Godaime and Sakura did a great job already. It doesn’t hurt anymore. Please don’t beat yourself up over it.” He hesitates, and then adds on a whim. “I’d throw myself at you and tickle you to death, chakra cloak or not, if that would be necessary.” Naruto snorts, some light returning to his eyes. Kakashi smirks softly. “Don’t worry about it.”

Naruto inhales, deeply. “Alright.”

 

Kakashi squeezes his hand one more time and then lets it go, with an effort. He exhales, trying to keep his voice light. “So. I take it I’ve been out for a while?” Naruto nods and Kakashi sighs, deeply, deliberately fake, making Naruto snicker, and then asks: “What have you been up to?”

Naruto grins, and then seats himself on the edge of Kakashi’s bed, hip pressing against Kakashi’s thigh. Which feels… weird. And good. Kakashi blinks, trying to focus on what Naruto is actually saying. 

“Well, you know we all came back together, and then she sent us home, right. I went for ramen with Sensei Iruka, Sakura only wanted to get a bath, so she went home. I talked with Iruka-san, and then later Ero-Sennin joined as well.” Naruto’s eyes sparkle for a moment. “It was a nice evening.”

Kakashi smiles at him, waiting for him to continue. 

Naruto looks out of the window for a moment. “Next morning, as you know, debriefing. We all went for lunch after, and then Sensei Guy invited us all to train with him. I spent the afternoon getting beat up at taijutsu by Lee, Neji and Tenten.” Naruto snickers, and then shakes his head. “Those three are really something else.” He tilts his head, shooting Kakashi a look. “In the evening, Neji took me back with him to the Hyuuga complex, I didn’t know why at first, but I think he did it for Hinata, because she was so happy to see me, right, still blushing and stammering a bit, but she’s also…” He trails off, shrugging, and then turning his head to look at Kakashi, fully. “She’s a lot more confident. Making her the head of the clan has done her good, I guess. We ate dinner together with her and Hanabi, and it was really nice. I like them.”

Kakashi blinks, carefully keeping the emotions from his voice. The relief. “You’re making friends.”

 

Naruto beams at him, coloring just a bit. “I guess.” He smiles softly, and then continues, with a shrug. “And then, yesterday, I hung around with Konohamaru a bit, and then ran into Kiba and Shino. Kiba had gone and beat my record of running up to the big oak, so I couldn’t let that stand, right? And I spent the rest of the day trying to beat his.” He grins, broadly. “And I did.” He shakes his head, with a groan. “But man, it’s becoming really hard, Kiba has gotten so much better.”

Kakashi chuckles, allowing the warmth within to spread. “You all have.” He quirks an eyebrow. “I’m sure Konohamaru has mastered the first stages of the rasengan as well, hasn’t he?”

Naruto’s eyes snap to his. “You know I’m teaching him?”

Kakashi shrugs, trying to be nonchalant about it. “I know a lot of things.”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, but doesn’t comment. “Yeah, well, he’s mastered two of the three stages. We’re working on the third right now.”

Kakashi hums, watching Naruto closely. “So how does it feel to be a teacher?”

Naruto grins, and then looks away, chuckling and blushing a bit. “I had no idea it would be so frustrating.”

He laughs, and Kakashi chimes in, watching the mirth in his expression.

 

There is a pause, and Kakashi just basks in the moment, allows himself to feel the presence. His voice is soft, the words coming by themselves. “How do you feel now to know you managed to save Gaara?”

A big, broad smile spreads on Naruto’s mobile face, the teeth glinting. He sniffs, with a shrug. “I’m just so happy we managed… it gives me…” He trails off.

Oh. Kakashi swallows, tries to swallow the instant bitterness away. I won’t let you die. Speaking the words, tone brittle. “It gives you hope that even if the Akatsuki catch you that there is a way to be saved.”

Naruto’s big blue eyes blink at him, a vulnerability that bleeds in them. “Yes. And…” He looks away, swallowing. He exhales shudderingly. “Gaara is my friend. I…”

Kakashi’s voice is a whisper, his tone imploring. “You have friends, Naruto. And they won’t let anything happen to you.” He swallows. "We won‘t let you die.“ He grimaces, vowing, silently. I won‘t let you die. 

Naruto nods, a bit wildly, but the smile is forced, looking away for a moment. “Yes, I know I have friends. I do. Now.”

Pain hangs in the air, tangible for a moment. 

Kakashi’s voice is a whisper, vague chocolate on his tongue, but he ignores it. “I remember a little blond boy, who told me that there was a little girl, with huge lilac eyes that was always nice to him.”

Naruto ducks his head, and his lips twitch, just softly. “Yeah…”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, deliberately shaping the words., deliberately making his tone light. “Don’t make me tell her… I hear she’s training to master the Lion Fist’s.”

Naruto hisses in a decidedly exaggerated way, and then laughs, with a shake of his head. “Right. And I don’t want to get punched by one of those.”

Kakashi shakes his head, tone very dry. “Nope.” 

Naruto giggles, while his eyes glow again.

 

Kakashi sobers, slowly, watching that mobile face. The whiskers. The sparkling eyes. He blinks. “So. How does it feel to return home after each mission once more? Not travel around?”

Naruto inhales deeply, and then exhales, in a rush. “Good. I mean, it’s nice to be able to return to your own space, and to your colleagues and friends and…” He hesitates, looking out of the window for a moment. “But I miss people not knowing who I am. What I am. I mean, a lot guessed when they saw the whiskers, but there were also a lot who didn’t seem to and it was… nice.” His big blue eyes return to Kakashi’s dark one for a long moment. “Here, people still look at me weirdly. And with resentment.” He grimaces, voice a bit glum. “I wonder if that’ll ever change.”

And Kakashi cannot help himself, he reaches out again, squeezes Naruto’s hand again. “I’m sure it will.”

 

Naruto blinks at him, and then sniffs, voice almost inaudible. “Have you ever hated me for what I am?”

Kakashi stares at him, mind blank, caught totally unprepared, like a deer in headlights. “I…” 

Naruto looks away, with a painful little smile, nodding. “I see.”

He wants to get up, but Kakashi is having nothing of it, staring at his own hand tugging Naruto back down. He licks his lips, feeling the tension from Naruto. “Naruto, I…” He frowns, and then decides to go with the truth, seal be damned. Go. Make me pass out again. See how much I care. He grimaces, trying to find the words to convey his sincerity while somehow bypassing the restrictions to actually say something. “Naruto I loved your parents very much. They died that night, as I’m sure you figured out by now, and I was still young, younger than you are now, and for a long, long while I hated what happened.” He snarls, shaking his head on the pillow, remembering the desolation he had felt offering his fingers to that crying baby back then to hold onto something, and the sheer, utter loneliness he felt. “But I…” He shakes his head again, squeezing his fingers, a hint of chocolate on his tongue now. “But I always knew it wasn’t your fault. And I…” He swallows, his tone imploring. “And I made damned sure others would start to see that as well.”

Naruto sniffs again, and then squeezes his fingers back, with a nod. “Thank you, Sensei.”

Kakashi grimaces, the words ‘please call me Kakashi’ heavy on his tongue. He swallows them down, the thought glum. No. Too soon still. He closes his eyes for a moment. 

And then he opens them again, locking them with Naruto’s. “Anytime.” He tugs on Naruto’s hand in rhythm of his words, heavily emphasizing. “I am not afraid of you.” He licks his lips, adding on a whim. “Baka.”

Naruto snorts, and then nods, wildly, while wiping his eyes with his other hand. “Okay.”

 

 

 

The door swishes open, and Tsunade stands there, expression stern, but gentling when her gaze falls to their clasped hands. Kakashi refuses to let go, but allows Naruto to withdraw it when he gets up to turn to greet her nonetheless. “Baa-chan.”

Tsunade glowers at Naruto but doesn’t comment, and Kakashi smirks beneath his mask, remembering Jiraiya’s words. She really loves him. He exhales softly.

Tsunade steps into the room, her voice firm. “Naruto. I had told you not to wake him?”

Naruto pouts, somewhat indignantly. “I didn’t?”

Kakashi interjects, lifting his empty, and itching-to-clasp-Naruto’s-fingers-again wrapped right hand. “Mah, mah, he really didn’t Godaime.” He shoots her a small glower. “I’m a big boy, I managed to wake up on my own.”

Naruto snickers.

Tsunade harrumphs, hands on her hips, and then she grins softly, while tilting her head towards the door. “Off you go now, you brat. Go and fetch Jiraiya for me, alright? But then I want you to go train with Sakura and Sai.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. She’s already introduced him?

Naruto groans. “Oh, not Sai? Really? He’s such a…” He grimaces, never finishing the sentence. 

Tsunade smirks, but her tone is stern. “Yes. Go and train with each other, so I can send you out on missions soon. I want to be sure you know how to move with each other.”

Naruto grimaces, but steps towards the door, raising his hand in a little wave. “See you later, Sensei!”

Kakashi raises his bandaged hand. “Yep.”

 

 

 

Tsunade closes the door behind Naruto, with a soft sigh. “I know you feel better already, but I want you to stay in bed until I’ve sent them out again.”

Kakashi opens his mouth and then closes it again, settling on a vague “Why?”, eventually.

Tsunade sighs, crossing her arms, while stepping closer. “I’ve been intercepted by the elders, demanding I keep Naruto here, within the village, for protection.” She shares a look with Kakashi, nodding. “Something about it made my skin crawl.” She smiles, grimly. “I want you to take your nin-ken and search for Danzo. Try to find out if this ass has dared to return in some kind of fashion.” She sighs, her gaze turning vaguely apologetic. “I know it’s not perfect, but your dogs are the only ones able to trace him at all.”

Kakashi grimaces, nodding. He clears his throat. “Who will get my team?”

Tsunade smirks at him, softly. “I officially asked Tenzou.” His gaze snaps to hers. Tsunade continues, lowering her voice only for him to hear. “I know you talked to him already, just in case, but… He wanted to get out of the leading position of the Anbu again. I think he wants more time off, for personal reasons.” She quirks an eyebrow, grinning for a moment, and Kakashi shares it, genuinely happy for his old friend. “Given his previous position, I have asked him to go by the name of Yamato from now on.”

Kakashi hums, nodding. “Good thinking.”

Tsunade clicks her tongue. “I’ve also asked him to come by. He should be here, shortly.”

 

They are silent for a moment, and Tsunade steps up to the window, looking out of it. Her tone is soft. “What was that I interrupted just now?” She turns her head to shoot him a look. “It seemed intimate?”

Kakashi glowers at her. “I…” He sighs. “He still feels the villagers scorn. And he asked me if I ever hated him for what he is.”

Tsunade hisses, grimaces. “Uhhhhh, tough one.”

Kakashi nods, with a sigh. “Yes.” He swallows. “I tried to assuage his fears as much as I can without the seal interfering.”

Tsunade hums, nodding. “Well, judging by how I found you, you managed.”

Kakashi swallows. “He’s… “ He hesitates, staring into space for a moment. “He doesn’t deserve any of this.”

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow. “Maybe.” He frowns at her and she shrugs. “But fate could have chosen someone much worse. Imagine if someone like Danzo had gotten their hands onto the nine-tails chakra.”

Kakashi grimaces. “Yeah.” 

 

He frowns, trying to find the words to address his hunch regarding the changed genetic makeup, but the door swishes open again, and Jiraiya comes in, voice booming. “Kakashi. Slept enough?”

Kakashi grunts, torn between vague annoyance and sparkling excitement. “I believe.”

Jiraiya chuckles, his eye falling onto the Icha Icha books on the nightstand. He points at them. “I brought you Icha Icha Paradise, though I know you’ve read them before… still, it’ll help to pass the time, right?” His hand hovers over the books for a moment, before he shoots a sly down at Kakashi. “Or someone reading them.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, but Tsunade beats him to it, her tone dry. “Stop teasing him all the time, Jiraiya. He has it bad enough.”

Jiraiya leans back against the window, with a mock pout. “Bad enough? We are talking about my godchild.” He tilts his head at Kakashi, and suddenly there’s a whole mountain of gravity to his words. “We have to make sure he shapes up.”

Kakashi’s mouth drops open, more than vaguely pissed off, his tone acerbic. “And here I thought I was the best thing that could happen to him.”

Jiraiya grins down at him, tone very amused, and laced with something Kakashi cannot place. “You are. But that doesn’t mean our work is done?”

Kakashi pulls a face, looking away.

 

Tsunade sighs. “Dammit Jiraiya, stop pushing him all the time. He’s doing formidably.” She snorts. “Although, not according to our intelligence quarters.”

Jiraiya snorts, darkly. “Oh yes, I remember Ibiki trying to talk me into supporting their… let’s call it strategy when we went and signed that contract with Sunagakure…” He hums, locking his eyes with Kakashi. “That is what I mean though. It’s not your character we have to shape up… it’s your political skills.”

Kakashi grimaces, hiding his face behind his hands for a moment. I see. “Please, no.”

Jiraiya sighs, his tone softer again. “I know you’ve seen lots of shit in your Anbu time, and I know you are no stranger to all the back and forth of scheming, but sooner or later you will have to deal with the powers that be, too, and they will come for you.” Jiraiya smirks, grimly. “If you really manage to stay back while he is around… they will try to remove you from the equation. Permanently.”

Kakashi drops his hands, staring unseeing at the ceiling. “Lose-lose, I get it.” He grimaces. 

Jiraiya sighs softly. “I wouldn’t call staying true to your principles losing, but yes.” He shrugs. “Right now, everyone knowing is watching with popcorn out so to speak, and they expect you and Naruto to gravitate to each other…” Jiraiya spreads his hands. “As would be normal for soul-bonded couples, lets be real.” 

Tsunade tilts her head, her voice soft. “In order to allow the boy to actually grow up and make an informed decision we have to…” She trails off, obviously trying to find the words.

Kakashi continues, tone beyond dry, repeating Jiraiya’s words. “Remove me from the equation.” He grimaces, with a smile like acid. “Temporarily.“

 

Tsunade grimaces, too, but nods, silently. 

Jiraiya sighs. “I will need to go and check on the other Akatsuki for a while. I will return to teach Naruto the synchronization jutsu, which, as you may know, is the first step to access sen energy, at least with a toad’s help.” He frowns, looking at Kakashi. “I hope we still have time. Now that we beat some of the Akatsuki when we went and retrieved the Kazekage, they will regroup, but it’s hard to say what they’ll do.”

Kakashi nods, with a grimace. “Still. That will be important.”

Jiraiya nods. “And you should train him to refine the rasengan while I’m away.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, with sarcasm dripping off his words. “Me? I thought I should be temporarily removed from the equation?“

Jiraiya’s teeth flash. “Well, we cannot torture you by separating you completely, can we.”

Kakashi grunts, shooting him a withering look.

Tsunade interjects, shaking her head. “You can do that after the next mission.” She shoots Jiraiya a look. “From what I’ve seen he’s not accessed his affinity yet, has he.”

Jiraiya shakes his head. “No.” He returns his gaze to Kakashi. “I bet it’s wind, but you should probably make sure. And then find a way to make him learn how to control it, and refine the rasengan with it, rapidly.” He snorts. “That might be the hardest part.”

Kakashi frowns, looking away for a moment. Maybe, but if he could… “I…” He hesitates, and then lowers his voice, not wanting it to carry. “During the last mission I noticed that his kage bunshin are different than normal ones…" He shakes his head once. “He was in what you call the chakra cloak, two tails out, and his kage bunshin were still there. And they felt some of what he felt.”

Jiraiya frowns, narrowing his eyes. “That is unusual. They should be separate from him, only having the knowledge of him at the time of creation. And then passing that knowledge on when they dispel?”

Tsunade nods, with a frown. “Right. He cannot have refined Tobirama’s jutsu that easily?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “I don’t think he did. But I… think that his special chakra system and his genetic makeup are very different.”

Jiraiya blinks at him, obviously hearing something in the undertone. “His genetic makeup?” He tilts his head. “I mean, the whiskers are known and accepted, that’s happened before?”

Kakashi grimaces. “Yes.” He hesitates, clicking his tongue before continuing. “But never have there been reports of those jinchuriki-born exuding special powers. And… there never has been a jinchuriki, from birth, that was jinchuriki-born.”

 

Silence, as both Jiraiya and Tsunade dwell on his statement.

Jiraiya leans back against the window eventually, arms crossed. His voice is dark, calm, without inflection. “What are you implying.”

Kakashi sighs, reaching up to rub his forehead. “I’m actually not sure. But we do know that the whiskers are a visible sign of a genetics adaption, right?” He nods at Jiraiya. “When I was close to him when he carried the chakra cloak…” He raises his hand, looks at his fingers. “His nails were claws, not just the chakra laid over it. His eyes were red, not just the chakra coloring it. The pupils elongated. His teeth were sharp and the fangs longer.” He lowers his hand again, with a sigh. “He can change his body with the fox’ chakra. It’s not just a cloak.”

Jiraiya is silent for a moment.

Tsunade frowns, her voice coming haltingly. “But we know that other jinchuriki can change into their tailed beasts… we have even seen it with Gaara? And curse marks, and sage mode can also change the body?”

Kakashi nods, rapidly, trying to find the right words. “I know. But the curse mark mutates the body’s cells, like a virus, even though it may be on demand. It’s artificial, and can be removed, and its results vary.” He licks his lips, raising his eyes to Jiraiya. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but the sage mode you can enter, and, for example, that Orochimaru is permanently stuck in, borrows elements of the contract fraction, right? It’s something you share with them, something you adapt from them, coming with the energy used?”

Jiraiya frowns at him, lips pursed. “Yes. When I enter sage mode, I take on aspects of a toad.”

Tsunade’s mouth quirks into a quick smile. “Only some though.” She grins, sharing a look with Jiraiya. “It would be fun to see you as a full toad, though.”

Jiraiya grunts. “Ha ha. I’ll make sure to hop by if that ever happens.”

 

Tsunade snickers, and then sobers again, refocusing on Kakashi. “So, what are you saying. Naruto is acting like he has a… contract with the fox?”

Kakashi shrugs, with a sigh. “I’m not sure? I mean, look at the Inuzuka clan. Kiba can take on aspects of the dog he is training. Can transform into it, even. Gaara transformed into the one-tails, but he didn’t wear the cloak, from what they’ve reported.” He looks up at Jiraiya. “Actually I have never before heard of the cloak being used.” He frowns. “And you haven’t either, otherwise the corrosive qualities wouldn’t have surprised you.”

Jiraiya smiles at him, a bit proudly. “You’re right.” He sighs, shifting a bit. “And you think that may be due to Naruto’s unique disposition?”

Kakashi shrugs. “He is transforming into the fox, bit by bit, while still controlling kage bunshin. He is using the fox’ chakra, for strength, and it leaks out, as the cloak, which also protects. But it leaks out only, because he’s still controlling it.” He grimaces, nodding at Jiraiya’s chest. “I know there is a point where he loses control, but…” He shakes his head. “He can not only access it, use it, but…”

Tsunade bites her lips, finishing the statement. “He’s in charge of his transformation.”

Kakashi exhales, slowly. “I’m not sure, if he can do it consciously though, or if it is emotionally driven.” He grimaces. “Given the aspects he uses to transform, it’s probably subconscious, and emotionally triggered. At least when the cloak comes out.”

Tsunade frowns, staring at him. “You think you can teach him to do it consciously.”

Kakashi shrugs, with a deep sigh. “I don’t know. But he has been really good at hengeing, right? Despite being exceptionally bad at actually cloning, thanks to his then bad chakra control?”

Jiraiya narrows his eyes. “You think he’s done this before. Changed into the fox, I mean.”

Kakashi grimaces. “I think he’s explored aspects of it. I don’t think he’s transformed completely, I think that…” He weighs his head. “He is fighting to be seen as normal, and he wants to be seen as normal, I think he shies back from trying too hard.” He blinks. “But I bet he went and tried the fun little things. Like nails and teeth.”

Jiraiya nods. “Something easily hidden. And something he had probably seen on others. Like Kiba.”

Kakashi nods. “Who he has some kind of rivalry with, yes.”

Tsunade nods, and then clicks her tongue. “And this… basic control of the transformation bled into his kage bunshin of course. Tethering them to him with…” She shakes her head, lifting her shoulders. “Somehow. I have no idea how it works. But I know I have never heard of clones that were still connected and receiving input after creation.”

Kakashi’s voice is low. “And not only that. But they…” He grimaces. “I don’t know how to put it. They have personality?” He shakes his head, remembering the deadpan comment he witnessed, and continues, knowing he is right. ” I mean, their own.”

 

Both Sannin stare at him, silent. Kakashi tries not to squirm under their gazes. 

Eventually, Tsunade speaks again. “That is impossible.”

Jiraiya shoots her a look, and then weighs his head. “Unlikely.” She scowls at him, and he shrugs. “You know I’m right. He is a literally unknown being. There has never been someone like him before. God knows what his powers are.” He chuckles. “Naruto probably gives aspects of his personality more room in them.” He winks at Kakashi. “Maybe you should ask him to henge a shadow clone for you at some point. Check her personality.”

Tsunade hits him on the arm, none too gently, and Jiraiya exclaims, loudly. “Ow. What was that for? You know we have to test the hypothesis?”

Tsunade glowers at him for a moment, but then sighs, deeply. “I know.” She turns her gaze to Kakashi. “Find a way when you train with him.”

Kakashi grunts. “Well. Given what we think we know… it would be beneficial to just train him and a thousand clones simultaneously.”

Jiraiya snorts. “True. Make sure to have Tenzou there for extra control though, because if he exhausts his chakra the fox will have easy access, so to speak.”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows. “Good point.”

 

Jiraiya lifts his head. “A propos Tenzou.”

The door opens, and Tenzou comes in, hesitating when all three look at him.

He blinks. “Am I too late?”

Tsunade shakes her head, with a small smile. “No. Please close the door though.”

Tenzou nods, and does so, stepping up to Kakashi’s be afterwards. “Senpai.”

Kakashi gives him an eye-smile. “Looks like you’ll take my team sooner than we thought.”

Tenzou raises his eyes to Tsunade, who nods. He tilts his head. “I see.”

Jiraiya hums, uncrossing his arms. “Kakashi has warned you about the fox?”

Tenzou nods, shooting a quick look at Kakashi before his gaze returns to Jiraiya. “Yes.” He hesitates. “He said that at… four tails bleeding out somehow you were almost killed.”

Jiraiya nods, starting to unbutton his vest. “Yes. Let me show you.” He grins, winking at Tsunade. “I came close to death only twice - once when I tried to peep into a bath house and Tsunade caught me…” He grins as she blushes a bit, rolling her eyes. “And the other time when the fox attacked me.” He takes off his shirt, revealing the still angry and indented wound. “I’m explicitly calling it the fox here, not Naruto, because he wasn’t in control anymore.” He shares a quick look with Kakashi, before continuing. “You must subdue him before.”

Tenzou stares at the wound, his voice almost toneless. “How did you survive this.”

Jiraiya chuckles. “Toad regeneration. Otherwise I’d be dead.” He pulls the shirt back over his head. “I’m glad it didn’t blow a limb off though, I’m not sure if I could regenerate a whole arm or something.”

Tsunade huffs, with a roll of her eyes. “Show-off.”

Jiraiya chuckles at her, eyes sparkling. “I still came to you for healing, didn’t I.”

She blushes, looking away.

 

Kakashi watches them, the realization warm. They really do love each other. Maybe not as if bonded, but… He clears his throat, addressing Tenzou. “I know you’ll manage.” He smirks, remembering Tsunade’s comment regarding the name. “Yamato.”

Tenzou smirks, just a bit. “I will do my very best. Senpai.”

Tsunade raises her eyebrows, interjecting. “There have been reports of a spy from the general vicinity of Orochimaru wanting to meet with some Akatsuki. We would like to intercept that spy.”

Kakashi frowns, shooting her a look. “I thought there were reports that Sasuke had killed Orochimaru already?”

Jiraiya sighs, deeply, while closing his vest. “Orochimaru is extremely hard to kill. Sasuke may have managed, or he may have thought so, but I bet Orochimaru has a plan B to… P for his resurrection.” He claps his hands. “In any case, that is part of what team 7 is supposed to find out.”

Kakashi blinks. I see. He looks up at Ten… Yamato. “Good luck.” He knows his eye says what he does not say out loud. Please take good care of them.

Tenzou nods, and then leaves, and Kakashi stares after him, silently.

 

Jiraiya’s voice is low. “You’re getting better at letting him go.”

Kakashi sighs, closing his eyes. “My time with Sora has brought acceptance…” He reopens his eye, looking up at Jiraiya. “And he is not a child anymore.” He swallows. “Obviously.”

Jiraiya waggles his eyebrows. “Yes, yes, I have heard rumors about the mission to the Land of Demons…” He trails off, shooting a look at Tsunade. “And I have seen the empty frames in your office.” He smirks. “Too bad his photo won’t hang directly next to his Dad’s…” He chuckles. “That would be something.”

Tsunade hums, nodding. “He really looks like him though.” She shoots a sly look at Kakashi. “Looks like your crush will fulfill itself after all.”

Kakashi stares at her, coloring an instant, deep red. His voice is gruff. “Did everybody know?” 

Jiraiya snickers. “Sorry. Kushina told me back then, and I told Tsunade the other day.”

Kakashi groans, hiding his face behind his hands. 

Tsunade reaches for his leg, pats it through the blanket, tone dripping with humor and affection. “Now, now, Kakashi. Who can possibly blame you.”

Kakashi groans again, wanting to vanish, now.

Tsunade chuckles, and then clicks her tongue. “Alright, team 7 will leave tomorrow, you will stay in bed until the day after, and then you’ll go after Danzo.” 

He lowers his hands and she locks her gaze with his, the hazel eyes hard. “Or you will try to.”

Kakashi nods, the muscles in his jaw jumping. “With pleasure.”

 

A huge shadow drops out of the sky outside, making the earth shake.

Tsunade rolls her eyes.

 

Jiraiya claps his hands, with a grin. “My ride’s here.” He turns to open the window, hopping out. “See you later!”

Tsunade watches him go, and then sighs, softly. She catches Kakashi’s gaze and shrugs, vulnerability passing over her face, there and gone again. “I always have this feeling, that one day he won’t come back.”

Kakashi grimaces, his voice soft. “It is a risk that exists for all of us?”

Tsunade sighs, watching the big toad jump up and vanish. “Yes, but…” She shakes her head, and smiles, fake. “Ah, it’s irrational.” She turns to leave. “Get some more rest, Kakashi.” She hesitates, shooting a look back at him. “And no push-ups on the hospital bed again. I heard you like to do that even if hooked up to an IV… seriously, if I catch you doing that I will personally sit on you until your chakra levels have normalized.”

He grunts, not rolling his eyes with an effort.

She puts a hand to her ear. “What was that?”

This time he rolls his eyes, tone deliberately put-on. “Yes, Godaime-sama.”

She grins, reaching for the door. “Good.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He waters Mr. Ukki before he goes, glad he doesn’t have to leave Naruto behind, the village feeling empty without him, somehow.

 

 

There are no traces of Danzo at the borders of Amegakure this time. 

Nor at the borders of the Land of Wind.

Kakashi turns his feet east, grimly.

 

 

After two weeks, his pack is exhausted.

 

Kakashi returns to Konohagakure, tired and disappointed, and Tsunade sighs, sending him home.

 

He stares at Mr. Ukki’s leaves, letting his fingertips hover over it.

Reaching.

 

And he smiles, brilliantly, when there is a knock on the door.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi watches Naruto sleep, there on his couch, where he’d finally succumbed to exhaustion, after having told Kakashi aaaaalllll about the run-in with Sasuke, and a half-snaked-Kabuto, and his fight with him in chakra cloak once more, and Sai’s weird personality and history, and then running into Orochimaru again though he should have been dead, and him hurting Sakura while transformed, and waking up from the rage-haze with Sensei Yamato restraining him, and the exhaustion, and Orochimaru’s spooky, empty hideout, and Sasuke’s weird gaze, and his weird attack on him, and Sasuke in his mind, subduing the fox, and Sasuke leaving him there, leaving with that Orochimaru and Kabuto, staring at him, and…

 

And Kakashi had watched Naruto talk, not interrupting, had simply listened. Had watched that mobile expression, the glittering eyes. The quivering whiskers. The broad smile. The warmth in the gaze. The outrage at Sasuke’s behavior echoed in the emotions displayed so openly on the pretty face. The flying hands, the body that is shaping up so well.

Had listened to the emotions in the voice, to the longing, and joy, and fear, and anger, and exultation, and excitement. 

 

Had watched Naruto grow sleepy, and slow. Had watched the blue eyes dim, and had gotten up to get a blanket. 

 

Had echoed the little mile that Naruto had given him when he’d tucked him in.

Had bent down to push the headband off, ruffling the hair, gently.

 

 

 

And he’d dared to let himself fall a bit deeper.

 

 

 

Just a bit.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 26: Wind under wings

Notes:

I hadn’t seen this ship/pairing coming… when it occurred to me it made a lot of sense to me though. I know lots of people ship him with Kakashi (and I have read BEAUTIFUL fics, too) but -here-… I think it fits. I’ll add the tag on next chapter posting.

And: That scene with the “goofing” around always was … inexplicable for me, since this is a very cheap joke for their relationship (shipping it/them or not). Naruto had never had qualms about Kakashi before, or being touched by him/touching him, and later on he doesn’t have any either. It’s just a joke they make there and in the one movie, and, honestly, it’s not funny imho. And so I had to sit down and turn it around. I hope it works.

Also: emotional rollercoaster coming up the next chapters…. 😋

 

And, a personal thing, if I may:

I‘ve hinted at picking it up before, the theme that Kakashi and Tsunade do what they do to TRY to keep the peace - and then are forced into a war, eventually, nonetheless.

Today, three days after one country forcing/declaring war on another, and the whole situation a literal powder keg with a LOT of potential in not direct, but close enough vicinity to me, this arc feels very different.
It’s been written for a while so I‘ll just post it as it is now, but it sure hits home differently imho.

I don’t know where y‘all from, and, as this unfolds… please remember to be kind to each other, and to remember that beyond all the propaganda and goals and speeches and events and politics… there’s people out there. People on each and all sides of this madness that are probably just as stunned as I am. And just as sad. And terrified.

Whatever will happen now, the attack ended a carefully built, 70-years long era of hopeful (maybe, probably? naive) politics for a lot of countries. It will change, totally apart from the devastating carnage already wrought, a LOT of things.
My heart is with those affected.

Please, wherever you are, stay safe.
And help each other, and those affected, if you can.

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

The wind ruffles Naruto’s hair, makes it shift, like fields of ripe wheat in the sun.

 

Kakashi blinks, trying to focus.

He clears his throat. “Here. Take these sheets of paper, so we can find out what your chakra nature is.” Though I think I know already.

Naruto quirks an eyebrow and takes the little sheet of paper, with a sidelong gaze at Tenzou, who hovers close. 

The little sheet of paper rips, cleanly, and Kakashi smiles. And I was right. “Your affinity is wind. With the ability to cut and slice. A very good affinity for battle.” It’s Asuma’s, too. 

 

 

Asuma, who had been by the other day, when Kakashi had been in hospital still. 

Who had sat on Kakashi’s bed, staring into space for a long moment, long enough for Kakashi to get worried. And then had said ‘I have to talk to you’ with this weird undertone, and the shine to his eyes.

Who had told him that Kurenai was pregnant, while blinking, rapidly. 

Who had then smiled the broadest smile Kakashi’d ever seen on him, and had hugged Kakashi, tightly. 

 

Who had made Kakashi promise to be there for Kurenai and the child if something should ever happen to him.

 

Whose words had sent a shiver down Kakashi’s spine.

 

 

Tenzou speaks up now, drawing him back to the present, explaining the circle of vulnerabilities and strengths one more time. Kakashi inhales deeply, trying to relax, watching Naruto’s face. I see you slept through that part of Iruka’s classes as well. You imp.

Kakashi frowns, as Naruto latches only onto the fact, that his wind could help Sasuke’s fire. He and Tenzou share a look. 

Tenzou clears his throat, confirming. “Yes.” He hesitates a moment. “You will need to find your own techniques against Sasuke.” 

Kakashi shoots him a glance. Though from what you told me, they worked well enough against the resurrected Orochimaru…

Naruto looks away for a moment, a shadow passing over his face.

Kakashi frowns, remembering the exultation Naruto had exuded after meeting Sasuke at the flying castle… and the weirded out excitement that had come off of him in waves when he had told him about meeting Sasuke in Orochimaru’s hideout. Everything you do is focused on him… He swallows, silently amending. And me. He sighs quietly. I wonder where that’ll lead us, someday.

 

He clears his throat. “Alright. You will now create multiple kage bunshin to first train your chakra’s change of nature stronger.” He smirks to himself. “By ripping a leaf cleanly in two with it.”

Naruto exclaims, loudly, hitting his fist into his palm. “Easy.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. You wish. 

Naruto’s eyes glower. “So how many kage bunshin should I create?”

Kakashi points up into the tree they’re standing under. “At least one for each leaf.” Let’s see how many you can actually create.

 

Naruto smiles, accepting the challenge, and then his chakra surges, and hundreds of kage bunshin flare up, everywhere.

Tenzou clears his throat, silently taking up position. 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Well then. What are you waiting for?”

Naruto rolls his eyes at him. And then starts to concentrate, tip of his tongue between his teeth. Kakashi grins, turning to walk back a bit to Tenzou, who has brought up pillars of would to emulate a small shrine, something he’d said helped him with his concentration. He shares a quick look with him and then takes up position outside the pillars, lazily pretending to read while keeping an eye out on the sea of black and orange and gold. 

 

He doesn’t hear the first little rip of the leaf, but he sees the clone jubilate, in the distance. 

Kakashi grins, checking the sun’s position. Only like half an hour or so. Very good. He quirks an eyebrow, looking at all the Narutos. Though he’ll be exhausted when he releases them. He calls out softly. “Alright, Naruto, now release them and concentrate on the exercise knowledge.”

A clone close to him sniffs. “Right.”

Another one rolls his eyes. “Do we have to? I mean, we could continue?”

A third one yawns.

Kakashi blinks, and then watches them vanish, as the real Naruto a ways off releases the jutsu. And smiles, proudly… only for those big blue eyes to dim and roll up into his head. 

 

Kakashi catches him, just in time, the already asleep boy snoring gently into his neck. Kakashi snorts, something deep within him fluttering. 

 

Tenzou steps up to them, his dark eyes filled with humor. “And here I thought it was exhausting for me.”

Kakashi shifts to lift Naruto onto his back properly, the long limbs hanging every which way. He chuckles softly. “Well, you saw the sheer amount he created. That must have been what… 500? 600?”

Tenzou’s tone is dry. “832.”

Kakashi snorts. “832?”

Tenzou shrugs lightly, falling into step with him back to Konoha. “I had to reach out for them, for their chakra. At some point I counted.”

Kakashi shakes his head once, feeling Naruto’s hair tickle. “So what do you think? Will we manage to make him create a new jutsu this way?”

Tenzou quirks an eyebrow, weighing his head. “If he manages to wake up after a night’s sleep, yes.” Kakashi frowns, and Tenzou shrugs, with a bit of a grimace. “I mean, he just put in more than 400 hours of concentration. We’ll see how resilient his mind is, in addition to his physical resources.”

Kakashi hums, clicking his tongue again, slowing his pace. “We haven’t talked about the mission yet.”

 

Tenzou nods, and then shrugs again. “Four tails.”

Kakashi exhales, in a rush. “Four tails?”

Tenzou clicks his tongue. “And not as a chakra cloak either, full transformation.”

Kakashi grimaces. He shoots Tenzou a look, while tugging at Naruto’s arms to shift his weight a bit. “What was the trigger?”

Tenzou snorts. “Orochimaru. Showing up and taunting him with Sasuke.”

Kakashi frowns. “Orochimaru… how exactly did he survive? Do you know?”

Tenzou shrugs. “From what I gathered he kind of respawned from the cells Kabuto took into himself. Though I bet he had other means at his disposal, too.”

Kakashi sighs, with another grimace. “Still. To be killed by Sasuke already, and then to have his hide beat up by Naruto must have scratched Orochimaru’s ego.”

Tenzou snorts. “Indeed.” He sobers, with a frown and a sidelong glance. “Orochimaru seems to have a weird kind of power over Sasuke, especially after resurrecting. Though I wonder if that is part of it, maybe he promised him he would resurrect his family? But Sasuke… only cared for Naruto, totally ignoring us. And Naruto…” He lowers his voice, tone imploring. “Naruto didn’t even move to defend himself when Sasuke came at him, sword drawn. It was Sai who intercepted the blade, since I was wounded.”

 

Kakashi frowns, heavily, concentrating firmly on the chest pushing against his back with every breath for a long moment. He clears his throat. “I see.” For a second he feels the rain on his skin, smells the aroma of scorched skin and cloth. He tears his mind away from the memory, with an effort. “I guess I need to talk with him about that.” Losing him is unacceptable.

Tenzou hums. “Still.” He grimaces, weighing his head. “I’m not sure how to put this, but I had the distinct feeling that Sasuke’s sword would have…” He trails off, gesticulating a bit. “It’s the angle, you know?” He shoots a look at Kakashi, obviously trying to find the right words, his eyes flitting to Naruto for a moment, before returning to Kakashi’s. “Sasuke stepped up to Naruto, almost like an embrace, moving the sword up and around Naruto, seemingly to stab his back.”

Kakashi stops, staring at him. His tone is flat. “But it’s a chokutō he carries, not a tanto, right?”

Tenzou nods, with a small smile, that fades again, immediately. “Exactly, Senpai.” He licks his lips. “He could have, like… stabbed his leg? Or maybe his lower back? If he’d shifted it to the side? But he couldn’t have angled it to point at the heart. That was simply impossible while standing chest to chest.”

Kakashi blinks, trying to understand. “You’re saying you think Sasuke didn’t actually attack Naruto.”

Tenzou grimaces, with a sigh. “I’m not sure. He sure as hell attacked me.” He snorts. “But yes, I have the distinct feeling that he was warring with himself in regards to Naruto.” He raises his eyebrows, his big black eyes staring into Kakashi’s eye. “You told me that when he and Naruto fought the chidori pierced Naruto’s shoulder…” 

Kakashi swallows, his tone gruff. “Yes.” His knuckles are white.

Tenzou ducks his head just a bit, obviously sensing his emotional state. “It was not aimed to kill then either.”

 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, feeling the warm puffs of Naruto’s breath against his neck. He tries to pinpoint what he’s feeling, the weird mix of relief and sorrow and guilt and pain churning deep within him. Fate possibly dulled that sword after all. He swallows, nodding, once. “I see.”

He reopens his eyes with an effort, locking them with Tenzou’s dark ones. “Thank you.”

Tenzou nods, too, and then clicks his tongue. “I… think something’s gotta give the next time they meet though.”

Kakashi frowns, with a grimace. “You think so?”

Tenzou grimaces. “Just a gut feeling.”

Kakashi sighs. “Alright. Thank you for the warning.” 

 

He finally resumes his walking, and Tenzou falls into step with him again.

Kakashi clears his throat, changing the subject with an effort. “So. How is leading team 7 in contrast to serving as an Anbu.”

Tenzou chuckles and then sobers, tone suffused with sincerity. “Like a breath of fresh air.”

Kakashi hums, with a nod. “I know the feeling.”

Tenzou shoots him a look, and then shrugs. “Sai is finally loosening up a little, I mean, I remember how it was for me…” 

Kakashi frowns. “Yeah. I remember, too.” They are silent for a moment, ignoring the amused looks of the villagers as they walk by. Naruto starts to snore softly into Kakashi’s neck.

Tenzou chuckles, with a sidelong glance. “He’s a wild sleeper.”

Kakashi hums, with a smile. “Always has been, yes.” He clicks his tongue. “It used to annoy me, at first.”

Tenzou quirks an eyebrow, lowering his voice. “You must miss him.”

Kakashi swallows, inhaling deeply, his throat clicking when he speaks again. “Yes. But it is a good thing that you are their leader now.” He sighs, shooting Tenzou a look. “If I would be close all the time…” Tenzou quirks an eyebrow, but remains silent, and Kakashi continues, after a moment. “I must admit though that I relish every opportunity to be with them. Not just him. Him especially, of course, there’s no use denying it, but…” He smirks, shrugging carefully without dislodging Naruto’s head where it’s lolling on his shoulder. “But I will always be their Sensei.”

Tenzou grins. “And my Senpai.”

Kakashi snorts. “I’ve noticed.”

 

Tenzou tilts his head. “Yugao says it’s because you are this overpowering, almost legendary Anbu.”

Kakashi stops again, in the middle of the street, staring at him. Torn between amusement and affection and flabbergastedness. “I…” He blinks, deciding to go for the insinuated relationship first. “You and Yugao?”

Kakashi isn’t sure, but this might be the first time he’s seen Tenzou blush, ever. 

Tenzou stammers, just a bit. “I… yes.” The big black eyes are watchful, as if expecting a verdict. “We both know we’re not soul-mates, but we’re happy, and her daughter Aiko is so cute, and I feel peace when I’m with them, and I’m...”

Kakashi grins, broadly, bumping into him, on purpose. “Gosh, that makes me so happy, Yamato.”

Tenzou grins, ducking his head. “Thank you, Senpai.” He sniffs, and then grimaces a bit. “I just hope Hayate won’t hunt me down in afterlife.”

Kakashi laughs, once, loudly, and then resumes his walking, feeling lighter somehow. Elated. He smirks, shaking his head. “Hayate may have been a lot of things, but he was no asshole. He’d be happy for you.”

Tenzou’s tone is a bit caustic. “You think?”

Kakashi hums. “I’d bet my life on it.” He shoots Tenzou a look. “That why you kept it secret?”

Tenzou nods, words rushed. “Yeah, I mean, we met a few times when she took Aiko to the playground, you know, with the Anbu duty times our time off was often in the mornings, right, and so I sometimes crossed her path, and of course we knew each other, and so I stopped at some point, and then…”

Kakashi grins, shooting him a look. “And then you started going by the playground on purpose.”

Tenzou clears his throat. “Yes. And I realized I really like being with them. And things developed.”

Kakashi hums, walking up the stairs to Naruto’s apartment. “And you do share the insanity to call me overpowering and legendary.”

Tenzou snorts, heavily. “Well, but you are, Senpai?”

Kakashi shakes his head, stopping to let Tenzou open the door to Naruto’s apartment. “If any of our skills are legendary, then yours are… much more than mine.”

Tenzou frowns, watching Kakashi toe off his shoes. “But mine are artificial.”

Kakashi snorts, wryly. “And mine are not?”

Tenzou weighs his head. “Only some of them though.”

Kakashi sighs, turning back to him slightly. “Do you really think they could have made you develop this ability, and made you use it, too, if you had no powers of your own?” He quirks his eyebrows. “Besides, I know your skill.” He clicks his tongue. “Don’t sell yourself short.”

Tenzou tilts his head, a bit sheepishly, but with a glint to his eyes. “And you, Senpai.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, but with a smirk. “Alright, alright.” He looks back at Tenzou, seeing him hover in the entrance. “It’s alright. Go and enjoy the quasi day off.” He grins. “Who’d have thought Naruto would get it this fast.”

Tenzou snorts, but nods. “We should push him to conjure even more bunshin next time.”

Kakashi chuckles, but shakes his head. “I think actually it would be better to reduce them… not only is it extremely trying for you to keep an eye on them all, but it’s almost impossible to pinpoint for us to see which clone advances the skill. And while Naruto may know after he releases them, we can only build on the knowledge if we reflect on the process with him, too, meaning we need to point him to the clone before it releases.” He smirks, raising his eyebrows. “200 clones should be enough next time.”

Tenzou nods, and then smirks, too. “Right. And of course it means it will take just the tiniest bit longer.”

Kakashi blinks, shooting him a look, vaguely ticked off. “I do not intend to sabotage his process?”

Tenzou blinks, and then rapidly shakes his head. “No, Senpai, I…” He sighs. “I only meant to tease, you know, to insinuate that…” He blushes again, and then finishes, almost inaudibly. “You can watc… be with him a bit longer.”

Kakashi stares at him, and then blushes, furiously. 

Tenzou turns, seems on the verge to say something else, and then obviously thinks better of it, as he just points to the door. “I… I’ll go. See you later, Senpai:”

Kakashi growls softly, playfully, raising his chin a bit. “Mhh hmmmm. Give Yugao my best.”

 

Tenzou nods and jumps, and Kakashi stares after him, and then snorts, once. 

Yugao, hmm? You’ll do each other good. He concentrates on feeling the warm breath puff against his neck for a moment, feel the weight of the body. And you’ll do Naruto good, too. 

 

He turns, silently stepping into Naruto’s bedroom, and then bends, to let Naruto roll onto his bed, carefully. 

 

Only to have Naruto cling to his neck. Tightly.

Deep in his sleep still, warm breath under Kakashi’s chin now. 

But holding fast nonetheless.

 

Kakashi hovers there, bent over Naruto, arms propped up left and right of his body, for long moments.

 

He could break Naruto’s hold, of course.

Which would likely wake Naruto up.

 

He should break Naruto’s hold, probably.

Like the good, reliable, sensible Sensei that he is.

 

He needs to break Naruto’s hold, definitely.

At some point.

 

 

He cannot make himself do it.

 

 

There’s this part of him that is tightly tethered to the need to smell and feel home and sunshine and peace that refuses.

 

 

He blinks, suddenly just glad that Tenzou isn’t there anymore.

 

Naruto sighs in his sleep and Kakashi snorts, inaudibly, and then lets himself shift fatalistically to lie next to Naruto against the wall, turning him onto his side in the process.

Naruto sighs again, and nestles in, a furnace of heat and summer.

 

Kakashi blinks, staring unseeing into space. Carefully not feeling. Not comparing this to that one night, all those years back, when he’d held Naruto in his arms, too.

 

Naruto’s head shifts on his arm, just slightly. Shifts his legs, pushing between Kakashi’s.

The skin beneath Kakashi’s mask where the breath puffs against is hot, and tickling.

 

Kakashi knows he must not close his eyes, just knowing he’ll fall asleep then, despite the day being early still, lulled in by the smell and the feeling.

 

 

Must not.

 

 

He tilts his head down, and breathes in, and does so nonetheless, surrendering to want.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kakashi doesn’t quite remember when he’s felt this warm.

There’s cool air on his skin, and a cool wall in his back, and it’s dark, but he’s warm, so warm.

 

Awareness is sluggish somehow, as if he’s drunk, tamed by relaxation and this feeling of… home.

Naruto yawns, and mumbles something, pushing his nose under his chin.

 

Kakashi’s eyes fly open, and his heart beats, hard, in his throat. 

OH. DAMN.

Naruto’s leg shifts, pushes up, almost against his crotch. 

Kakashi blushes, heavily. And then uses the replacement jutsu to vanish from the embrace.

 

Ending up in a heap in the corner.

Where the other plush had been. 

 

The one obviously used for taijutsu training. 

 

He’s actually not sure what’s more embarrassing, fleeing like that, or ending up upside down on the floor.

 

Naruto mumbles again, clutching at the torn Kakashi plush with a frown.

Kakashi pushes himself up into a seated position, staring at his back. Willing his racing heart back under control. 

Cold air from the window touches his heated skin, making him shiver.

He swallows, pushing his face into his hands, feeling like crying suddenly. Yearning, terribly, feeling lonely, despite being only 3 feet away.

 

There’s a rustling of cloth, and then Naruto’s voice, sleepy still, but filled with affection and vague worry. “Sensei?”

Kakashi drops his hands, and clears his throat, pushing himself up and dragging the shattered pieces of his dignity back up, like a cloak. Or a mask. He snorts to and at himself. His throat clicks as he speaks. “Naruto.” He forces himself to give Naruto an eye-smile, the golden hair seemingly silver in the moonlight. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

Blue eyes blink at him, seeming so dark. “I… “ Naruto smiles suddenly, widely. “You stayed with me.”

Kakashi blinks, looking away, his mind frantic and yet sluggish. Do you remember? Did you feel me? He clears his throat. “Err… I… well,…” He trails off, and then continues, forcing himself to say something sensible. Anything. “I wanted to make sure you were alright after that mass input.”

Naruto yawns, turning to face him, while nestling back in, pushing the plush behind him against the wall. “Ah. Thank you, Sensei.”

Kakashi swallows, nodding, pointing to the door. “I’ll just…” 

Naruto blinks, his voice low, interjecting. “I like being near you.”

Kakashi freezes, remembering Naruto saying that before, so long ago. He quirks an eyebrow, self-deprecating humor coloring his voice. “Yeah, well, so do I.”

Naruto hums, watching him through heavily lidded eyes. “It was warmer with you close.”

Kakashi grimaces, that question answered alright, blinking rapidly. He sounds lame to his own ears. “I shouldn’t.”

Naruto hums again, blinking slowly. “Please.” He hesitates. “Kakashi.”

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, for a long moment, and then steps over, helplessly. 

Naruto moves back even more, flattening the plush, and then draws him down, with a sigh, nestling back into him, with a hum. 

Kakashi swallows, staring at the wall behind Naruto’s head.

Naruto’s voice comes, laced with affection and a yawn. “Stop thinking so hard, Sensei.”

Kakashi swallows, voice almost inaudible. Blinking rapidly. “Right.”

Naruto pushes his nose back up, under his jaw. His body relaxes, head heavy on Kakashi’s left arm this time. His words follow Kakashi into dream. “It’ll be alright. Dattebayo.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

They don’t talk about it, when they get up, through some weird, unspoken agreement.

 

Kakashi makes breakfast, while Naruto showers.

He feels rested, as if he slept fully for the first time, in a long time. 

He frowns, trying to remember if he felt like this during his time with Sora. Or Iruka. Close maybe, yes. Iruka was real after all. But this… He shakes his head, giving up on pinpointing it.

Naruto comes in, toweling his hair, wearing sweatpants and an old t-shirt that rides up a bit, displaying a tiny bit of Naruto’s stomach. And the seal. 

Kakashi blinks, hastily averting his gaze. It’s active? He frowns, stirring the rice, deciding to address it, despite having to implicitly having to admit he‘d… looked. “Did you…” He shoots Naruto a look. “Did you just use the fox’ chakra?”

Naruto blinks, looking down at himself, and then he snorts, and blinks back up to Kakashi. “Ah, right, that.” He shakes his head, shrugging. “It’s just…” He pulls a face. “It’s stupid.”

Kakashi frowns, putting the fried rice into their bowls. “What is.”

Naruto sighs, with a shrug, settling in one chair, and accepting the bowl from Kakashi. “I…” He rolls his eyes. “It’s easier to use the dental floss when the fangs are bigger, because, you know, the spaces between are bigger, too, because they push at the other teeth a bit  and so I just… “ He shrugs, reaching for his sticks.

Kakashi stares at him, a bit dumbfounded, knowing his voice reflects that. “You use the fox’ chakra to enlargen your teeth at will?”

Naruto freezes, rice on his stick, his eyes coming up to Kakashi’s. “…Yes?”

 

Kakashi blinks and then snickers, feeling like wanting to facepalm himself, but refraining, knowing Naruto would take it the wrong way. Guess that answers that question. He sniffs, pointing with his sticks, and then starting to eat with chakra-speed-enhanced bites, shaking his head. “So. What else?”

Naruto colors a bit. “What else?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes at him. “You cannot tell me that was all of it. What else have you tried?”

Naruto’s color deepens, but he keeps speaking, rather courageously in Kakashi’s opinion. “Well, you know, small things, like the nails? And the eyes? And the ears?” He trails off, looking away, and Kakashi narrows his eyes, waiting. Naruto clears his throat. “The teeth are easiest somehow.” Kakashi watches as Naruto pushes his tongue along his teeth, under his lips, and then shrugs. “I kinda like them.”

Kakashi hums, carefully giving him an eye-smile. “They make you feel dangerous.”

Naruto blushes, deeply. And then he swallows, eyes dropping to Kakashi’s mask. “You also have fangs, I saw them when you pretended to be Sukea.”

Kakashi hums, quirking an eyebrow. “Rather normal ones, yes, though they tend to be rather pointy, which, before you ask, that is a clan trait, yes.”

Naruto blinks, tilting his head. His voice is careful. “Are you the last of your clan?”

Kakashi hesitates, keeping his tone carefully neutral. “As far as I know?”

Naruto nods, once, a quick and sad smile flitting over his face. “I guess we have that in common.” He blinks. “And Sasuke.”

Kakashi grimaces, amending quietly. “If you count Itachi out, yes.” And… Obito. And there are a few other Uzumaki‘s… though he’s right in regards to Minato. 

Naruto blinks again. “Right.”

 

They are silent for a moment, each going through the implications.

Naruto finishes his rice, putting his sticks down with a small click. His voice comes haltingly. “Have you… never felt the desire to continue your clan?”

Kakashi snorts. “Marry and have kids?”

Naruto nods, with wide eyes. “Yes? I mean, having a family is a beautiful thing, isn’t it?”

Kakashi swallows, throat dry. “It is.” And I know you want to have one, too. To be in one. Whatever that desire will mean for us later. He tries to keep his voice steady. “Sometimes it doesn’t work out as planned though.” He grimaces, shrugging. “For example me and Iruka.” He can see Naruto opening his mouth to ask and continues, needing to deflect. “And sometimes the line of work makes it impossible.”

Naruto’s mouth snaps shut again, with a frown. “So you’re saying that a shinobi cannot have a family? Or should not?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No. I’m just saying that my line of work wasn’t suited for a family.” And I was way too young anyways, at first. Or felt as if I was. 

Naruto hums. “But that’s different now, isn’t it? You’re not Anbu anymore?”

Kakashi clears his throat. “Right, I mean, in principle…” He trails off, not knowing what to say. You already know I wasn’t interested in the kunoichi. You know that somehow there’s this unspoken, unnamed, unaddressed thing between us… He shrugs, a bit lamely.

Naruto stares at him, for so long Kakashi is beginning to get uncomfortable. “What.”

Naruto shrugs, looking away, while coloring, deeply. “Nothing. I just… tried to imagine how your kids must look.”

Kakashi stares at him. “My… kids.”

Naruto scratches at a non-existent stain on the table, beet-red. “Yeah, I mean, you must have been very cute?”

Kakashi’s mouth drops open, his brain in flat-line.

Naruto continues, still red, but with a smirk now, obviously teasing. “And, well, I imagined if you had kids, like, with Hinata? Or Sakura? How they would look?”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he wheezes. And then hides his face behind his hands for a moment, his words mumbled. “Stop. Please.”

Naruto laughs under his breath, quite obviously finding pleasure in torturing him, dammit. “Oh, and then I imagined if it was Ino, and that kid must be quite blond, right, and with spiky hair, and then I im…” 

He trails off abruptly, and then pushes back from the table, the chair scratching along the floor. 

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, following that trail of thought just fine. And then you imagined what our child would look like. He snorts silently. Not that this is possible. Still. He leans back, looking up at Naruto with a sigh. 

Naruto, who stands there, seemingly stuck between fight and flight impulse. 

Kakashi presses his lips together and then shrugs, making his tone light, with an effort. “Well, a kid between us would… probably have light, standing up hair, maybe blue eyes, and two whiskers.”

Naruto’s eyes snap to his. 

For a long moment, there is nothing, no breath, no thought, and then Naruto swallows, latching onto the one thing that seems innocuous. “Two whiskers?”

Kakashi nods, quirking his eyebrow. “Jinchuriki descendant. That child would be second generation, so one generation less. Their child would then have one.”

For a moment something tickles at the back of his brain, something Jiraiya said, something… Kakashi frowns, unable to pinpoint it. 

Naruto frowns, too, obviously mulling over this new information. 

 

His tone is careful when he finally speaks, still standing in front of the table. “So, since I have three… I’m what… jinchuriki born?”

Kakashi pauses, mentally retracing his steps, and then wincing, deeply. Right. He frowns, wondering at the lack of chocolate for a moment, before he recalls that comment back then, that the seal would not prevent telling if Naruto knew already. 

Kakashi smirks grimly. Ahhh, the fine print. He clears his throat, deciding to see how far he can push it. “Yes. Your mom was an Uzumaki, you have your name from her. She was chosen to be the jinchuriki back then.”

Naruto blinks, rapidly. “But if she was the jinchuriki…”

Kakashi exhales, slowly. “She died that night, as I told you.”

Naruto stares at him, his tone flat. “My parents were important to the village then?”

Kakashi smiles softly, looking away for a moment before returning to the gaze that is so much like his, and so much like hers. “Very.” There’s a hint of chocolate now, and Kakashi grimaces, with a shake of his head. He clears his throat. “I cannot tell you yet.”

Naruto blinks, with a frown. “You cannot tell me? Like you cannot talk about the other thing?”

Kakashi smirks, viciously. Clever boy. “Yes.”

Naruto raises his eyebrows, nodding to himself. He sniffs, and then sits down again, watching Kakashi for a long moment. 

When he finally speaks, he sounds much older than he is. “I wonder if it is the same thing that keeps everyone else from telling me things, too.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, and then grins at him, a bit darkly, making sure it shows. “Getting obvious at some point, huh.”

Naruto’s face darkens, and there’s a pout on his face. “It just sucks so much, Sensei?! I mean, even Hinata sometimes breaks off, and falls silent, and she’s someone who never hesitates to be close to me at least, or respond to me. I mean, the others have gotten better, too, but there’s always something they mustn’t tell, you know, and it…” He shakes his head, lips pressed together.

Kakashi sighs through his nose, deeply. He continues, when Naruto stays silent. “It’s unfair.”

Naruto crosses his arms, looking away. 

 

Kakashi tilts his head. “It’s why you didn’t tell anyone you could transform at will, did you. To not remove yourself from them even further?”

Naruto frowns, his profile drawn. “I know I’m not like them. I’m… weird.”

Kakashi snorts, ignoring the heated gaze Naruto throws his way. “Please trust me, everybody is.”

Naruto sniffs. “Not like me.”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Maybe not exactly like you… but exactly like them.”

Naruto’s eyes snap to his.

Kakashi leans forward, with his elbows on the table, head propped up on his folded hands. “Tell me, Naruto, do you think I, with my sharingan I did not possess from birth, was not perceived as weird? Or Sensei Yamato, the only one with wood release? Or Hinata, too gentle in her clan’s mind?” Kakashi quirks his eyebrows. “People will always find something. Sometimes it’s just easier to find things for one person than for another.”

Naruto pulls a face, but swallows, his shoulders relaxing a bit. 

Kakashi sighs softly. “If you want to be yourself you have to accept yourself. Accept your strengths and your weaknesses. Find out what you can do. And then…”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “Everything else will click into place?”

Kakashi laughs. “Nope. Not that easy, sorry. But at least you’ll know what you can work on then.”

“Hmmm.” Naruto looks away, unseeing out the window.

Kakashi waits, giving him space to think through it.

Naruto clears his throat eventually, his gaze returning to Kakashi’s. “Will we train with bunshin again today?” 

Kakashi nods. “Yes. But I want you to limit yourself to 200.” He frowns, adding on a whim. “And I want you to grant them the transformation they want.”

Naruto stares at him. “The… transformation they want?”

Kakashi shrugs, trying to seem nonchalant. “Try out your abilities?” We need to know what you can do. And you need to know that, too. He clicks his tongue. “First though, I want you go by Sensei Asuma… and get some tips. He has the same affinity that you do.”

Naruto’s eyes widen. “Oh. Cool.” He grins, broadly. “I’ll do that right away.”

Kakashi nods, with a gentle smile. “Alright.”

 

Naruto stands up again, turning, and then hesitates, looking back at Kakashi. He grimaces, and then asks, voice careful somehow. “Sensei? Why do you try so hard to stay away? Isn’t it alright if you like me?”

Kakashi blinks, trying to regroup, the change of subject throwing him for a loop. “Uhhhh.” He clears his throat, swallowing. “I…” He sighs, deeply, and then decides to be frank. Or as frank as he can be. “If we get any tighter people will think we’re a couple.” He almost snorts. Yeah, and some people are waiting for that, eagerly. And isn’t that funny. Not.

Naruto blinks, with a bit of a blush. “Would that be so bad?”

It’s Kakashi’s turn to blush, deeply. Dammit Naruto. He swallows, trying not to squeak. “No, I mean, yes, I mean…” He sighs, drawing a hand over his face, voice gruff. “Naruto, you’re still growing. And I’m 14 years older than you. If people would think you were, say, receptive to my… possible advances, so to speak…” He trails off, not knowing how to explain that one half of the people in charge would be ecstatic, while the other half would likely have his hide, and that one half of the village would be disgusted, while the other half would run their mouths. Or worse. Probably. Kakashi groans. “What exactly has brought this on?”

Naruto ducks his head, with a sidelong glance. “I just… You always fight so hard to stay like this foot apart, while…” He hesitates, his eyes big on Kakashi’s. “I know you want to be close.”

Kakashi shivers, closing his eyes for a long moment. His voice is gruff. “That transparent, huh.”

Naruto shrugs. “Yeah, but maybe it’s because I feel the same?”

Kakashi sniffs, turning his face away. He swallows, exhaling in a rush. “We shouldn’t push it at the world that much though. Just…” Just give it time, please.

Naruto blinks. “Alright.” He shoots Kakashi a sly look. “Maybe I should push back a few times. Pretend a bit to be shocked.”

Kakashi snorts, picking at a non-existent fluff on his pants. “Yeah, maybe.”

Naruto looks at his feet, voice small. "I‘d hate it though.“

Kakashi exhales, and then carefully smiles at him. "Still. There might be times when it might be even… prudent to do so.“

Naruto frowns. "Prudent?“

Kakashi grimaces, with a shrug. “Just an idea. I‘ll… make it obvious, then, ok? Give you a sign?“ He shrugs. "Like scratching my mask?“

Naruto nods, haltingly, with a frown. "Okay.“

 

There is a small pause, as they both seem to digest the conversation.

Eventually, Naruto clears his throat. His voice is small. “Sensei…”

Kakashi blinks, making his expression amiable. “Hmm?”

Naruto frowns, looking out the window. Fidgeting. “Sensei, should I… pretend in regards to Sasuke, too?”

Kakashi blinks, momentarily stunned. “In regards to…” He grimaces, carefully schooling his expression, furious at the sudden bout of vicious jealousy that wants to rise. He clears his throat. “Can you explain?"

Naruto sniffs, and then raises his gaze, bravely. “I… I have been thinking about the way I behave in regards to Sasuke… and how he reacts to me.” He looks away again, and then sighs, leaning against the doorframe. “Sasuke was so dark, and filled with rage. Driven to the point of almost madness. But he…” He hesitates, obviously searching for the correct word.

Kakashi exhales, nodding once. “You don’t think he actually wants to kill you.”

Naruto’s gaze snaps to his. He swallows. “No. And I…” He presses his hand against his own chest, as a fist. “I feel his pain, Sensei.” The big blue eyes fill with tears, the whiskers quivering. “And I want to bring him home, I need to bring him home, and I hurt for him.” He blinks, a tear dropping. “I…” He sniffs, reaching up to rub at his eyes. “I know that some of the other teams do not understand, and I wondered…”

Kakashi blinks, and inhales deeply. You wondered if you are coming on too strongly. He smiles, very softly. “Naruto. Caring for a teammate, and wanting to bring them back can never be strong enough. Please don’t stop believing that we, that you can do it?”

Naruto sniffs, looking down at his feet. And then he inhales, deeply, and smiles broadly. “Well then. I’ll come back to the training ground later?”

Kakashi hums, with a nod, letting him deflect, change the subject, knowing some things need to settle. “We’ll be there.”

Naruto tilts his head, with a small smirk. “Will you carry me home again?”

Kakashi clears his throat. “Possibly?” Which isn’t exactly helping with the rumors, I know. He sighs, deeply.

Naruto grins, obviously guessing his thoughts. “Well, if you’re here then anyways you could stay again?”

Kakashi shoots him a withering look. “We’ll see.”

 

Naruto steps into the hallway, calling back over his shoulder. “What will you do while I’m with Sensei Asuma?”

Kakashi blinks and then shrugs. “Water Mr. Ukki?”

Naruto’s laughter reaches him, relaxes something in him again. Naruto sticks his head back into the kitchen, eyes glowing while he ties his hitai-ate. “You could meet Sensei Iruka for lunch, too? I mean, you managed to be friends, right?”

Kakashi snorts, gently, allowing himself to feel the warmth the suggestion elicits. “Good idea.”

Naruto beams at him and waves, there and gone, the door falling into the lock with a soft click.

 

Kakashi shakes his head, with a groan, and then gets up to do the dishes.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Iruka grins at him, over his onigiri. His voice also carries his amusement. “He really said that?”

Kakashi shushes him, while ducking his head. “Not so loud, seriously, Iru-kun I mean…” He sighs, deeply, when Iruka just cackles. Kakashi shoots him a withering look. “Honestly though, I sat there like an idiot, trying to find some kind of argument to dig myself out of it.”

Iruka throws his head back, laughing loudly.

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up.”

Iruka sobers to a snicker, pointing his sticks. “Well, you said he’s a maverick ninja.”

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head. “Truer words were never spoken.”

Iruka chuckles quietly, wiping at his eyes with his free hand. “I would have so loved to be there.” 

Kakashi grumbles under his breath.

Iruka grins at him, with glittering eyes, but sobers slowly. He lowers his voice now, words only between them. “Seriously, Kakashi, and while this was hilarious to imagine, it also means that this thing between you is approaching, with huge steps.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away for a moment. “I know.” He returns his gaze to Iruka, debating whether to address the thing with Sasuke, but dismisses the thought, shaking his head once. “It was a wise decision to remove me from the team for the most part, the pull is…” He trails off, trying to find the correct word. “Almost frightening.”

Iruka frowns, watching him intently. “Does it feel artificial?”

Kakashi snorts. “That’s the bad part of it. It doesn’t. It feels like…” Everything I ever wanted. He shakes his head, reminding himself who he is sitting across from, and adapting his words accordingly. I really don’t want to wound you in any way. You’re one of the best things in my life, bond or not. “The most natural thing in the world.” He spreads his arms a bit. “Which, given his age, and my age, and the whole shitty situation ist just…” He shakes his head again.

Iruka hums, biting into another onigiri. He swallows, and then raises his eyebrows. “Still. You should consider allowing it?”

Kakashi stares at him, a bit pissed. “I had thought you of all people would understand why I need to fight it?”

Iruka nods, eyes closed for a moment, one hand up to placate. “And I do. And I don’t mean allowing the full relationship, but allow yourself to gradually fall into it?” He quirks his eyebrow. “I mean, he’s 15 and a half, he’s almost legally an adult, too, just a bit more than a year, and even Sora said you should allow yourself to fall in love over time?”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away for a long moment. His voice is gruff when he speaks. “And if I do that, what would it mean for him, hmm?” His eye returns to Iruka’s. “It would mean he would never have a relationship outside ours. It would mean he would have no frame of reference, ever. It would mean I would always carry this lingering regret and doubt with me, and I just know it would be that way for him, too.”

Iruka grimaces, looking down at his plate. And then snorts, with a small smile. “Ahh, Kaka-kun, how I love you.”

Kakashi hisses, through his teeth, understanding the meaning behind the words all too well.

Iruka clears his throat. “But what is the alternative? You don’t seem to be able to retreat?”

Kakashi draws a hand over his face. “I know. And I have no idea.” He shrugs, with a chuckle. “None.”

Iruka tilts his head, with a little smirk, that conveys his understanding nonetheless. “I’m sorry.”

Kakashi groans, deeply. “Thank you.”

Iruka nods, and then sniffs. “So. Off to go meet him again?” The twinkle is back in his eyes, and the shit-eating grin back on his lips. “And ready to carry him again, with subsequent sleep-over?”

Kakashi glowers at him, with crossed arms. Silently.

Iruka snickers, and signals for the bill.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

There’s a burst of fox chakra at a cluster of a couple of kage bunshin with fangs, and Kakashi jumps to dispel them, while keeping an eye on the others. 

He jumps back to Tenzou, who is sweating, obviously having to concentrate very strongly. His hand shivers a bit, despite the fact that he stabilizes it with his other. 

Kakashi frowns, addressing him carefully as to not break his concentration. “You will let me know when it gets too much?”

Tenzou blinks, once. “Of course, Senpai.”

Kakashi nods, looking back out over the sea of black, orange and gold. “Had a nice day with Yugao and Aiko?”

A small smile flits over Tenzou’s face. “Yes. We went to the park. Aiko hunted butterflies.”

Kakashi hums, narrowing his eyes at a bunshin with a pony tail. And another one with bangs. He clears his throat, deliberately not looking at that one too closely. 

Tenzou’s voice draws him back a bit. “It’s weird, isn’t it?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Weird?” He grimaces a bit, remembering the way Naruto had phrased it.

Tenzou clicks his tongue. “I just mean that there is a very wide range to his bodily expressions.” He shoots Kakashi a look, from the corner of his eyes, for just a moment. “It’s not just the hairstyles either, it’s body styles at times, too. The male form is predominant, but…” 

Kakashi nods, licking his lips. “I’ve noticed.” He frowns, remembering his discussion after the Land of Waves mission back then. He shrugs. “He never seemed to care much… he once told me he sees the soul, and that he goes by that.”

Tenzou frowns, and then snorts, softly. “That’s fitting.”

Kakashi shoots him a smile. “Yeah.” His hand drops to Tenzou’s quivering hand. He frowns. “Alright, enough for today. Keep it stabilized for a few minutes longer, I’ll have him dispel them cluster by cluster.”

 

Tenzou nods, and Kakashi jumps up and into the sea of Narutos, calling out to them all. “Naruto, I want you to dispel the clusters one by one, and try to integrate their knowledge bit by bit into working the wind style into your chakra.” He sees various clusters of three Narutos nod, concentrating deeply on the whirling ball of chakra between their hands.

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Now.”

He watches as one cluster after the other dispels, one every few seconds. 

Eventually, there is only one cluster left, a bit ahead of him, and he starts walking towards it, hesitating when he notices a certain chakra signature between the trees. Oh, so they’ve started to watch us again. He blinks, grimacing. Probably because of the display we made yesterday… I wonder… Time to… try ‘goofing’ around a bit I guess… I wonder if he’ll react like he said he would. And it will paint me even more into the pervert corner… oh well.

 

He raises his finger to his mask, making his voice a sing-song one. Knowing Naruto will catch the deliberate tone. “Oh Naruto…”

Naruto’s eyes - and his clones’ - snap to his. And then to the finger, pointing to his mask. Understanding flits across Naruto’s face. And a frown.

Kakashi gives him a big, fake, eye-smile, keeps chirping. “I don’t know how to say it… I’ve really started to take a liking to you…”

Naruto blinks, and then lets himself fall back, theatrically dispelling the clones with a shout. The chakra explodes into the air between them. Naruto raises his hand, pointing and yelling, with an indignant tone in his voice. “Don’t say gross stuff out of the blue like that, you jerk!”

Kakashi almost snorts, and then wonders if anybody would think Naruto would address him as jerk. Well, no-one who really knows us.

Naruto continues, hollering now, heavily emphasizing. “The jutsu I went to the trouble of creating” - Kakashi almost laughs out loud, stopping himself from shaking his head - “got messed up because you freaked me out.”

Kakashi blinks, and then reaches out, sighing a bit theatrically. With a whine laced under his tone, for good measure. “Uhhh, I didn’t mean it like that?” 

He steps close to Naruto, and Naruto ducks his head for a moment, hiding his pinched little smile, and then starts to scoot back, yelling. “Whoa stay back!”

Kakashi grins deliberately, ignoring him. “I don’t know quite how to say it…” He scratches his mask, still coming closer. “Well…”

Naruto yells, scrambling back, and Kakashi follows, still scratching his mask, the grin he sports starting to feel strained. Naruto is waving and screaming at him, while ducking his head from time to time to hide his expression and Kakashi shoots Tenzou a look, sees the flabbergasted expression on his face. Hmm. I might need to talk to him later. 

Out loud he finally takes the finger away from his mask, raising both of his hands. “Mah, mah, easy, just a… joke.”

Naruto lets himself fall back, hiding his face behind his hands to hide his tears of laughter. And pain. It’s clearly threaded through somewhere in his tone. “What a joke though.”

Kakashi sniffs, and swallows, silently concurring. “Yeah.” He squats down, and then reaches out to squeeze Naruto’s ankle, once. He says the words so low he knows it won’t carry beyond Naruto. “Thank you for playing along.” I know it’s been hard.

Naruto sniffs.

 

And then exhales, letting the hands drop to the grass… and promptly passes out, the mental exhaustion catching up with him.

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, insanely glad for this implicit sign of trust.

And grimacing, immediately, when he feels Ibiki come closer.

 

The big, bulky shinobi greets him with a smile. “Kakashi. I see you train him rapidly.”

Kakashi pushes up, tries to keep his stance relaxed. “Ibiki-san. Glad you approve.” Of my… training. There’s bile in his throat. 

Ibiki quirks an eyebrow, looking down at the sleeping boy. “Almost grown, too.”

Kakashi clenches his jaw. 

Ibiki pulls a face, with sigh. “Still. Too bad he doesn’t seem to be overly receptive of you.”

Kakashi smiles, with an effort. “There’s still time till the bond engages.”

Ibiki hums. “Indeed. Of course it would be easier if he would be so inclined. I heard of the priestess.”

Kakashi nods, putting on a sad expression, that hurts because it is so fake. “Yes.”

Ibiki stares at him, for a long moment. He tilts his head. “You will let us know if something changes?”

Kakashi tilts his head. “Something… changes?”

Ibiki sighs, deeply. “Kakashi, let’s be frank. The jinchuriki is an asset, and we do not agree to let him out on missions. However, the Godaime has overruled us. Still, we would be a lot more … let’s say relaxed, if he were, say… tightly linked to one of our own.”

Kakashi pastes a smile on. And you really think I’m one of you own? In this, especially? “Yes, I have been aware of your thoughts regarding this matter for a while now.”

Ibiki smirks at him, a dangerous, gentle smile. “And yet you have done nothing to ensure the desired outcome.”

Kakashi refuses to gnash his teeth, or swallow, or break their gaze. Instead he steps closer to Ibiki, holding their gaze, keeping his tone carefully kind, carefully neutral. He lifts his eyebrows, blinking innocently. “I’m sure fate will find a way.”

Ibiki glowers at him.

 

Kakashi sighs, and then bends down, pulling Naruto up and onto his back once more. Gives Ibiki a small nod. “Ibiki-san. So nice of you to drop by.”

And he turns, letting the leader of Konoha’s intelligence stand there, fuming.

And not giving the slightest fuck.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Tenzou’s voice is low, shooting him a look. “What was that, earlier?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, lowering his voice even more. “I sensed Ibiki’s chakra. Naruto and I had talked about it just this morning, because…” He grimaces, shrugging gently, Naruto’s breath puffing against his neck once more. “You know.”

Tenzou frowns, looking back at Naruto for a moment. “Good thinking.”

Kakashi grimaces, voice a hiss. “The little stunt hurt him emotionally.”

Tenzou hums. “Better than giving them leverage.”

They share a long look.

Kakashi sniffs. “Still.”

Tenzou puts his hand on Kakashi’s shoulder for a moment. “You’ll make it up to him.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He engages a privacy seal this time, absolutely not in the mood to grant Ibiki any information.

And then he sighs, sinking into the embrace a half asleep Naruto tugs him down to with the feeling of coming home.

Naruto hums, and nestles in once more, and Kakashi, for the life of him, cannot remember why this was ever a bad idea.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Tenzou knocks on Naruto’s door, when they’re having breakfast the next morning. 

Naruto skids to the door, and Kakashi carefully releases the seal, just before he opens it. Naruto’s voice is relaxed, and happy, and it tugs at something in Kakashi. “Sensei Yamato. Please come on in. Do you want some breakfast?”

Tenzou shakes his head, sticking his head into the kitchen for a moment. “Naruto. Senpai.” The dark eyes gentle for a moment, but then grow neutral again, and Kakashi swallows, some sixth sense already knowing. 

He clears his throat. “Yamato-san. Team 7 has a mission?”

Tenzou nods, and then addresses Naruto. “Please get ready. The others and team Asuma will meet us at the gate in 15 minutes.” 

Kakashi frowns, taking a sip of his tea. But not me. “I am called to the Godaime?”

Tenzou nods, watching Naruto hesitate, before turning towards his bedroom with a grimace. “Indeed.”

The door clicks shut behind Naruto and Tenzou lowers his voice so only Kakashi can hear it. “There has been a desecration of graves.” They share a look, and Kakashi grimaces. Tenzou clicks his tongue. “We will try to track those responsible down.”

Kakashi hums, and then starts to collect the dishes, putting them into the sink. 

Tenzou clears his throat. “Will this be a problem?”

Kakashi shoots him a look.

Tenzou shrugs, pointing at the door. 

Kakashi blinks. “Ah.” He grimaces. “No.”

Tenzou shifts to his other foot, probably watching how much effort it takes Kakashi to stay relaxed. “Alright.”

Kakashi nods, and then pastes a smile on, as Naruto returns, in gear. He clicks his tongue, makes his voice light. “Have fun, you two.”

Naruto smiles at him. “Absolutely.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “And practice a bit more with Asuma in between… watch his style closely.”

Naruto groans. “I just hope he doesn’t make me pay for it by inviting them to barbecue again… that was so expensive?”

Kakashi grins, amused, sharing a quick look with Tenzou. “He made you pay for them?”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “Yeah, for his team the other day.”

Kakashi hums, shaking his head once. He wants you to become friends with them. He shares another look with Tenzou, and then just shrugs, crossing his arms against the sudden need to reach out. “Good luck. If you are back before me… try to cut the waterfall as we discussed. I’ll water the plants. ”

 

Naruto’s smile is brilliant, and Kakashi stares at the empty echo of it, in his mind, for a long time.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“Godaime.”

Tsunade smiles at him, looking a bit stressed, big stacks of paper on her desk. She follows his gaze to them, smiling grimly. “Kakashi. A lot has been going on.”

Kakashi frowns, tilting his head. “More than the robbing of graves?”

Tsunade grimaces. “Yes.” She sighs. “There are reports of new Akatsuki members, apparently to replace the ones we took out, one of which seems to be a member of some cult… they’re leaving tortured and crucified corpses in their wake.”

Kakashi grimaces in disgust. “I see.” He exhales, and quirks his eyebrow. “And you want me to track them.”

Tsunade nods. “Try to, please.” She hisses. “They are on the move again.” They share a look, with Kakashi’s stomach churning. They’ll come here, soon.

He nods. “I’ll go right away.”

Tsunade raises her eyebrows. “I’ll call the Niju Shotai to be ready in a little while.”

Kakashi frowns. “You want to attack them with twenty teams?”

She shrugs, with a grimace. “Tracking them and running from them will not work indefinitely. We should try to stop them. On our terms.” She leans back. “Still. It will take a moment to get everyone ready. I hope it will be fast enough. Gather the intel we need, Kakashi.”

He inclines his head, with a sigh. “Yes, Godaime.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The corpses are not hard to find, the bloody mess left behind undisturbed by animals.

Kakashi frowns, looking at the woods, ice-cold dread settling in his stomach. What is it that keeps the scavengers away? The bugs? And the villagers to bury their own?

He frowns, looking up into the horrifically twisted visage of a man having gone to his death under excruciating pain and torture. He swallows, hesitating, and then hisses in annoyance, reaching up to pull the kunais out and then body down. 

The body is too light somehow, the limbs too brittle. The jaw stays open, locked in this never ending silent scream.

 

Kakashi tries not to look at the twisted face.

 

He buries the body in a small clearing in the woods, just placing a few branches and a few flowers onto it, knowing the animals will not touch it. 

 

Pakkun watches, eyes huge and darting around.

Nervously licking his snout.

 

Kakashi grimaces and then asks him to find the trail again nonetheless, and the next victim.

Sends the position back to Tsunade, with a hawk.

 

When the trail turns away from the Land of Lightning and back towards Konoha Kakashi sends Shiba home with another message, knowing Tsunade will likely spring into action now. 

And grimly buries another victim.

 

When the trail just… stops he shivers.

And heads back to Konoha.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The relief that floods him when he enters the gates and finds Naruto’s chakra within its limits is bottomless.

 

Tsunade takes his report, grimly, and updates him, and then sends him out to clean up and find Naruto. Her words are ringing in his ear while he showers. ‘Go. Reconnect and then train him. I… We need to hurry.’ He grimaces, staring at himself in the mirror while toweling off, the red eye glowing back, mockingly.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Sensei!”

Naruto’s eyes are glowing, and the smile is infectious, and Kakashi glides onto the stool next to him, inhaling deeply, the smells of him and ramen inexplicably belonging. He smirks softly. “Naruto.”

And then his arms are full of Naruto, of sunshine and home, and Kakashi chuckles, lightly patting his back while the ice-cold dread thaws just the tiniest bit. “Mah, mah, Naruto, I’m happy to see you, too.” He withdraws gently, carefully not rejecting, and Naruto sniffs, nodding once, before returning to his ramen. 

Kakashi watches him for a moment, the air between them simmering. He clicks his tongue. “So. Had a good mission with Asuma and his team?”

Naruto nods, and then snorts around a mouthful of noodles. He swallows, and then shakes his head once. “But what a mission it was, Sensei. We encountered these grave robbers, you know, and we managed to stop them, but they were strong, like, that one woman, I could only stop her by cutting her hair off? And she kissed me as a way of getting at my chakra and, like, she called it ‘french’ and it was…”, Naruto pulls a face, coloring a bit with a sidelong glance, and Kakashi tries to look nonchalant, while he is anything but, thank you very much, “and Asuma showed me some more tricks, but I haven’t been able to incorporate them into anything yet, and now he’s gone again, and…” He trails off, shrugging a bit listlessly.

Kakashi clears his throat, going through all the information. So someone is collecting material for… Edo Tensei? Orochimaru? Or someone else? And Asuma is already gone again? It’s really bad then. The Akatsuki must be close. He grimaces. I should check on Kurenai. “I see. Well, I’m actually here to tell you that we will continue training.” He frowns. “How is cutting the flow of the waterfall coming along?”

Naruto beams at him. “I managed for a second last night!” He blinks, looking away for a moment, his voice almost inaudible. “There was a shooting star, and I wished I could know what Sasuke is doing right now.”

Kakashi hesitates, frowning. Trying to curb the instinctual, idiotic jealousy that wants to rise. He’s the wind under your wings, isn’t he, the one who drives you. What will happen when you meet again? He clicks his tongue, dismissing the thought, with an effort. “I’m sure we will find him soon.”

Naruto blinks up at him, and then nods, mutely.

Kakashi sighs. “Well, if you’ve mastered cutting the flow we can work on incorporating this skill into the rasengan.” Naruto perks up, eyes alight once more. Kakashi smirks softly. “Not even the Yondaime has managed to incorporate a chakra nature into this jutsu. You might be the first to manage it.”

Naruto blinks at him, with his mouth open. “Not even Ero-Sennin either?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No.” And neither did I. He clears his throat. “But we need to hurry.”

Naruto frowns. “So, more clones again?”

Kakashi nods, but then weighs his head. “We’ll see. We’ll start at the waterfall again tomorrow, and you’ll try to twist the cutting of the flow to push the water back up for a while. That is only possible by shifting the direction, which we’ll then need to incorporate it into the rasengan.” He shoots Naruto a look. “So. Eat up. You’ll need your strength.”

Naruto grins at him. “Yes, Sensei.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kakashi watches Naruto sleep, from close distance, his arm numb from the weight of Naruto’s head. 

The whiskers twitch as Naruto smiles in his sleep, the eyes rapidly moving back and forth, and Kakashi sighs, trying to imagine the dream.

 

Dawn comes with the sun rising, and blue eyes opening to capture his heart.

 

 

 

 

 

And Kakashi lets them.

Helplessly.

 

 

Chapter 27: For whom the bell tolls

Notes:

When I decided to include Hayate/Yugao as a bonded couple (and now, continue that narrative with Tenzou and developing it further), I looked them up of course.
And, interestingly, Hayate had been Yugao’s Sensei (for kenjutsu), though there’s no big age gap between them.
There is however an age gap of 13 years between Hiruzen and his wife, Biwako (55 at the time of her death) (ran across an interesting timeline list and a Naruto age list).
Now, I only took a quick dive in, I’m sure there are other examples (and especially the Sandaime is… lol)
KakaNaru (comes) can come with a lot of problems, however neither age gap nor teacher/student relationship are completely unknown in ‘their’ world (nor our own).
Having Yugao in here with this experience of one part of it, and the knowledge of the other… lends a unique perspective imho.

It also means that Hiruzen, in this story setup, probably knew immediately what Kakashi’s tattoo meant, because he likely used to have one of his own.

And: Jiraiya’s story seems to be more or less census, at least as far as I could dig up.

Chapter Text

“So, Senpai?”

Kakashi grunts, not taking the book from his face where he’s laying in the sun on the wooden bench Tenzou created just for him. “Hmm?”

Tenzou’s voice is laced with humor. “Does the fact that you choose not to watch Naruto have anything to do with the fact that he and his clones are standing at the waterfall almost naked?”

Kakashi growls under his breath and Tenzou snickers. Kakashi lifts the book just a bit, and shoots him a withering look. “Ha ha.” He lets the book drop down again.

Tenzou chuckles. “That was not a ‘no’.”

Kakashi grunts again.

Tenzou hums, quirking an eyebrow, tone still filled with humor, but also laced with awareness, and respect. “Quite virtuous of you, Senpai.”

Kakashi grimaces, lifting the edge of the book again. “Stop being so good at reading me, Tenzou.”

Tenzou shoots him a look. “Yamato, Senpai.”

Kakashi lets the book drop down once more. “Right. Sorry.”

Tenzou hums. His voice lowers a bit. “Yugao is worried for you.”

Kakashi blinks, pushing the book off sideways. “She is worried for me? Why?”

Tenzou inhales deeply, obviously trying to find the right words. “She says since she knows how strong the pull is that it might…”, he grimaces, shooting Kakashi a quick look, “backfire.”

Kakashi blinks. “Backfire?”

Tenzou nods, once. “Yes, for you. The desire for your soul-mate can be so strong that, if it is unfulfilled, or rejected, it could result in suicidal tendencies.”

Kakashi stares at him, for a long moment. And she knows that very well. Has had them, too. He swallows, but then shakes his head. “I can assure you that I am very far from any suicidal thoughts right now.” He pauses, deciding to be brutally honest. “The farthest I have been for a long time, to be honest.”

Tenzou blinks, his lips pressing together for a moment, before he nods, once. “Alright.” He shoots Kakashi another look, one that sees too much. “Thank you for telling me, Senpai.”

Kakashi frowns, looking over at the wall of Narutos for a split second before gazing up into the sky. He licks his lips, makes his voice very soft. “Thank you for your concern, both of you.”

A small smile flits over Tenzou’s face. “Of course, Senpai.”

 

Kakashi exhales, watching the clouds drift by for a moment. He clears his throat. “So. Your own darkness is at bay, too?”

There is a small, grim smile in the corners of Tenzou’s mouth. “I’ve been very far from it for a while now, too.”

Kakashi hums, remembering that cave, so long ago. “I’m glad.”

Tenzou tilts his head towards him, just slightly. “Why did you take to sleeping out here though? I mean, we’re not that far from the village?”

Kakashi grimaces, and then groans, loudly. “Does nothing get past you?”

Tenzou smirks, and blinks his huge, black eyes. Innocently. “Head of the Anbu for a long time, remember?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. And then sighs, drawing the Icha Icha book back over his face. Yeah, fat chance to hide from him. “I… have to slow down.”

Tenzou’s voice is thoughtful. “So you are rejecting the bond.”

Kakashi pulls a face, trying to convey his sincerity. “I’m not rejecting it. I’m just… resisting, a bit.” He swallows, his throat clicking. His voice is a whisper. “The pull is…” He shakes his head. If I keep waking up with him in my arms I will kiss him, I just know it. And that’s… too soon. Simply too soon. 

 

Tenzou hums, opening his mouth to say something when there is a shout from the waterfall, all the Narutos there slicing it in two - and pushing it up, in sync. “ALRIGHT!”

Kakashi gets up, silently closing the book. 

Tenzou lowers his hand, slowly. “I have to admit, this training method is quite impressive… to think that Naruto would progress this fast…”

Kakashi shakes his head, shoving his hands into his pockets. “No… the training method isn’t the reason for all this.” He frowns, remembering seeing the Sasuke plush doll done and sitting there a few days back, something that had grated. Remembering Naruto looking up at a shooting star and then getting up again to train, in the middle of the night. He sighs. “Sasuke is what makes him so determined.”

Tenzou frowns. “Sasuke?”

Kakashi smiles, a small, brittle smile. “They’re like Yin and Yang. Two faces of the same coin… I cannot quite explain it, but they’ve always had this… connection.” He blinks, remembering. “They met, before the massacre, when they were still very small.” He snorts. “Naruto immediately told Sasuke they’d be friends.” And then Sasuke went home and… Kakashi swallows, letting go of that part of the memory, with an effort. “Naruto has always tried to keep up with Sasuke, all his dogged stubbornness training is based in his desire to close up to Sasuke and…” He clicks his tongue, feeling the words. “Bring him home.”

Tenzou is silent for a moment, watching Naruto dance around celebrating a bit still. His voice is gentle, careful. “Do you think it’s more than friendship for them?”

Kakashi blinks, and then he pulls a face, with a grimace. “I don’t know.”

Tenzou looks at him, the dark eyes full of understanding. “I see.”

Kakashi shoots him a look. “Mhh.” He clears his throat, looking back up at Naruto, who has just dispelled the clones, and is now jumping down into the lake with a big splash. “Time for the last phase, integrating the nature into the rasengan.” He grimaces. “Naruto will probably put even more chakra and force into the training this time… you’ll need to be watchful.”

Tenzou inhales deeply, and then rolls his shoulders. “I will be, Senpai.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Asuma and his team have engaged the Akatsuki. Asuma sent a messenger hawk.”

Kakashi clenches his jaw, shifting to his other foot. He swallows, something in him reaching. “I see.” They managed to find them with the intel I’ve sent back then.

Tsunade sighs, rubbing her temple. “How is training Naruto going?”

Kakashi shrugs, just a bit. “He’s found a way to stabilize the rasengan when he tries to infuse the chakra nature into it by using two shadow clones. The chakra he pours into it has almost let the fox break out beyond four tails once already. Tenzou is struggling.” He hesitates, turning to look at the still empty frame on the wall. “I believe he will be able to surpass the Yondaime.”

Tsunade nods quietly, following his eyes to the empty frame for a moment before locking with his. “I want you to be on standby… if something happens, you will leave him in Tenzou’s care to complete the training. I’ve sent Ino, Choji and Shino to help already.”

Kakashi frowns, but then nods. “Of course.”

Tsunade grimaces, tapping her finger. She clears her throat. “Sakura is focusing on learning even more about poisons, and drawing them out. She might surpass me.” She quirks an eyebrow, tilting her head. “I think she is preparing to try to bring Sasuke down.” A quick smile, there and gone again. “And kill him… or heal him.”

Kakashi exhales, in a rush. “You think we could actually draw Orochimaru’s poison out?”

Tsunade shrugs. “There must be a reason why he injected so much into Sasuke, right? Who knows how he’ll react if it’s gone? How he’ll react if we manage to remove the seal?”

Kakashi nods, hope rearing its ugly head. “Right.”

Tsunade nods again, and then sighs. “Dismissed.”

 

 

 

Kakashi inclines his head and jumps out, intending to return to Naruto and Tenzou, only to stop in his tracks at her soft words.

“Hey Kakashi.”

Kakashi swallows, and then turns to Kurenai, who sits on the bench, trying to keep his stance relaxed. “Kurenai.” He pastes an eye-smile on. “You look radiant.”

She snorts, with a roll of her eyes. “As radiant as one can look with morning sickness.”

Kakashi hums, stepping up to her and sitting down next to her. “I heard that is why you were removed from the active roster.”

Kurenai pulls a face. “Lots of shinobi don’t have any problems staying on duty until their third trimester, trust me to keel over.”

Kakashi snorts, and then ducks his head at her withering look. “Sorry.” He clears his throat, knowing she’s here because she’s hoping for information. He grimaces. “I’ve been put on standby.”

She blinks, rapidly, and then sniffs. “I see. So they’ve engaged them.”

Kakashi inhales deeply. “Yes.”

Kurenai fidgets, twiddling with the edge of her skirt for a moment. Her voice is toneless. “I have a bad feeling.” She shoots him a look, the red eyes flat somehow. “Just…”

Kakashi swallows, and nods, silently. His voice is gruff. “Whatever I can.”

She sniffs, and nods too. And then angrily wipes at her eyes, pushing herself up. “Alright.” She shoots him a brittle smile and starts walking away, and Kakashi watches her leave, the tips of his fingers cold.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kakashi waches the wind rasengan whirr through the air, uncontrolled and exploding off to the side, the two clones stabilizing it disappearing in a puff of smoke, and Naruto falling down onto the earth with a groan. Staring at his shaking hands.

He clicks his tongue with a grimace, calling out. “Break of 15 minutes.”

Naruto groans again, but falls back, breathing heavily.

Next to him, Tenzou lets his hand sink, also breathing heavily.

 

Chakra tickles his senses and Kakashi smiles softly, raising his eyes to look at the edge of the forest. Where Sakura stands, once more. 

Kakashi knows she has stood there, for several days now, just watching.

He wonders if Naruto knows, too.

 

Today seems to be different though, as she steps out of the foliage a bit hesitantly, carrying a small basket in her hands.

He raises his hands. “Sakura-chan. So nice of you to come by?”

She blushes the tiniest bit, her hands twisting on the basket’s handle. “Sensei.” She nods at Tenzou and Naruto. “Sensei Yamato. Naruto.” 

Naruto gives her a little wave, while Tenzou nods at her. 

She steps up to Kakashi, looking down at her basket. “Sensei… I had wondered what I could do to help, and I…” She shrugs, holding the basket out a bit. “I have created food pills for all of you.”

Kakashi blinks. “Food pills? Like the ones of the Inuzuka or Akimichi clans?”

She nods, energetically. “Exactly, Sensei. Only more generic. They’re meant to replenish chakra reserves real fast.” She grimaces, blushing a bit more. “I’m still working on the taste though, but they work real fine?”

Kakashi blinks, and then gives her an eye-smile. “That is an awesome idea, thank you very much!” He grins. “And don’t worry about the taste, they’re a tool, I bet the ones of the clans have do not taste like heaven either.”

Tenzou snorts. “No, they don’t.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Oh?”

Tenzou shrugs, while reaching for one of the pills. “Joint mission with one of the Akimichi clan a while back. We ran out of food, he had a few pills left. The pills kept us alive and in fighting shape.” He raises his eyebrows. “Having pills outside the clan’s knowledge base would be a great asset.” He bites into the small, dark ball and starts chewing, almost managing to hide the… obvious shock at the taste. 

Kakashi presses his lips together, mightily amused. That good, huh? 

Tenzou clears his throat, opening his mouth to say something and then hesitates, his eyes faraway for a moment. He blinks and then takes another bite, frowning, while Sakura watches, with a grimace. 

Tenzou nods, finishing the ball in silence, to Sakura’s ever-increasing nervosity. He swallows the rest down and then addresses Sakura, tone sincere. “You should indeed work a bit on the taste, Sakura-chan, but they are even more chakra-restoring than the ones of the Akimichi clan - or at least the ones I was allowed to taste then.”

 

Kakashi raises his head a bit, sharing a look with him, and then nods, accepting Tenzou’s verdict. “An awesome contribution then, Sakura-chan.” He reaches for one of the pills, nodding at Naruto a few feet away, who is still concentrating on breathing. “Why don’t you give one to Naruto as well.”

Sakura beams at him and then turns, stepping over.

Kakashi pulls the mask down a bit, puts the pill into his mouth, biting onto it… and is insanely glad for his back-on mask, turning his eyes to Tenzou’s at the bitter and slightly… foul taste. 

Tenzou grins at him, widely. Leaning in, whispering with an innocent batting of his eyelashes. “Just keep on chewing, Senpai.”

Kakashi grimaces, and then does so, with an effort. 

The taste stays, but there is a rush of energy after a few seconds indeed, coming with almost bottomless relief. 

Kakashi swallows it down, clearing his throat, his voice almost inaudible, only to be heard by Tenzou. “Well, if nothing else, it encourages people to keep good watch out for their chakra levels.”

Tenzou laughs, silently, and then has to turn away to hide his snickering as Naruto yells, spitting the pieces of the pill out, while cursing wildly.

Kakashi sees Sakura’s shoulders sink, and calls over, a bit meanly. “Eat one, Naruto. They are very good for your body. Don’t be such a…” He grins, remembering that moment, so long ago already. “Coward.”

Naruto sits up, in a rush, glowering at him. And then takes another pill, chewing on it, defiantly. 

Still glowering at Kakashi.

Kakashi laughs silently, keeping the gaze.

Sakura returns quietly, her face a mixture of pride and embarrassment. 

Kakashi puts a hand onto her shoulder, squeezes it a bit, his voice carefully kind. “We meant what we said. Very effective. The taste does need an overhaul.”

She nods, and her stance relaxes, with a sigh.

Kakashi hums, waits until she locks her eyes with his. “I heard you focus on studying poisons, and drawing it out?”

 

She shrugs, and then something stubborn enters her features. “I’ll bring him home.”

Kakashi snorts, gently, squeezing her shoulder again. Letting his pride color his voice. “Good.”

She smirks, just for a second, before leaning in, her voice dropping. “His hands are hurt.”

He frowns, looking down at her. “They are?”

She shrugs. “I felt it when I he took the pill from me and our fingers touched. The cells are damaged.”

Kakashi inhales, frowning, his hand dropping off her shoulder. “ Wind nature tends to cut deep.” He grimaces, remembering the hairline scars on his own hands and wrists from his own chakra nature jutsu. “The fox will heal him.”

Sakura quirks an eyebrow. “I hope.”

Kakashi blinks, tilting his head. “You don’t think so?”

Sakura shrugs, looking back. “It’s very low level, which makes it very difficult to heal.” She shrugs again. “We’ll see, I guess.”

Kakashi nods, with a grimace. “Yes.”

 

There is a hawk’s call, and Kakashi’s gaze glides up, a shiver running down his spine. He tries to decide whether to go and check back with Tsunade or not when his gaze drops to the message on the bird’s foot, the color of the ribbon.

Ice settles in his stomach.

 

Oh no.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Tsunade reads the message, her mouth a thin line. 

She holds it out for him to read, too, and he does, bile rising.

Her voice is tired. “Go and tell Kurenai?”

Kakashi swallows, compulsively. “I will.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

She knows, immediately, when she sees him.

He holds her, while she cries, rocking her, gently.

 

There are no words.

 

Just pain.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Shikamaru comes by, later, still dirty and dark, and Kurenai latches onto him, drawing him into a tight embrace, immediately.

Kakashi sniffs, and takes his leave, limbs shivering.

 

 

 

 

 

He drops down next to Tenzou, staring at Naruto for so long Tenzou starts to get nervous.

Tenzou’s voice is a whisper. “Senpai?”

 

Kakashi blinks, and then lets his own rasengan flare up, calling out to Naruto. “Show me the strength of it.”

Naruto’s eyes and his clone’s eyes shoot up, glinting, watchful, seeing too much and Kakashi aims, with a snarl.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto and Tenzou both fuss over his bleeding and burnt arm, but he doesn’t even feel it, the pain of Asuma’s loss keeping everything else at bay, fusing darkly with the relief at seeing Naruto’s wind-enhanced rasengan stronger than his own, already.

By leagues.

 

Kakashi shakes his head, and simply wraps his hand, and then takes Naruto shopping, for another set of black clothes.

 

Holds him, for long minutes, when he cries.

The pain in his hand throbs, in time with the one in his heart.

 

 

Naruto’s expression is grim when he returns to training, eyes rimmed red and furious.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He watches Tsunade intercept them, frowning when she tries to argue with the count of three.

Calls her bluff, his tone viciously relaxed. “It will be alright if we’re four, right?”

She glowers at him.

 

He smirks at Shikamaru, letting the darkness leak through. “Naruto doesn’t need my help anymore.” He clicks his tongue. “You should send him after us as soon as he’s… ready.”

I doubt he’d stay away anyways.

And he’s increased the number of clones… he’ll be ready soon now.

 

Tsunade’s expression is pinched, but she nods, once.

 

Kakashi raises his eyes to Shikamaru’s, echoes the fire in them. “Let’s go.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Shikamaru’s tactics are brilliant, and successful - and failing nonetheless.

Four hearts. And an immortal priest with blood curses. Such madness. 

 

Kakashi watches Shikamaru go to draw Hidan away, the exertion of four chidoris tearing at him. I wished I had thought about taking some of those disgusting food pills along. He grimaces, shooting a look at their adversaries, the black puppets staring back at him soullessly.

 

Alright. Let’s bring those masks down.

He exhales, and then collects chakra, for another try.

 

One of the masks shatters, without their doing. 

Kakashi grins viciously, behind his own, knowing Shikamaru has indeed successfully tricked Hidan.

 

And then his neck tingles, and his gut churns, and a wall of wind and water throws Kakuzo and his puppets back.

 

Tenzou tilts his head back, tone deliberately light, indicating his state of clothes. “I’ve never seen you so… slovenly, Kakashi.”

Kakashi smirks grimly, feeling the torn mask shift a bit. “The enemy is pretty strong.” He bends down and summons Pakkun, sending Sakura and Sai to help Shikamaru. Watches Naruto taunt Kakuzo. He blinks, his words almost inaudible. “He’s perfected it?”

Tenzou shakes his head. “No. It only works about 50 percent of the time… However…”

Kakashi blinks, and clicks his tongue. “I see.”

 

He watches as Naruto sends kage bunshin as reconnaissance drones, watches with his sharingan recording as the first try fails. 

Their eyes catch, for a moment, when Naruto demands to try again.

Kakashi locks his red eye with Naruto’s, watches the pupil shift into the fox’. Slowly, deliberately.

He nods, and shares a look with Tenzou, holding Choji and Ino back.

 

Time grinds to an almost halt, and Kakashi watches as if in slow motion as Naruto tries again, and hits, and then uses the bunshin as a triple diversion, when Kakuzo builds up a shield from his own chakra and tissue.

 

The whirring of the final rasen shuriken is everything that can be heard, and felt, the vibrations searing.

 

Kakashi cannot help himself, he jumps forward, right up to the event horizon of wind, and light, and sound, and power, feeling as if his whole being could disintegrate into the love he feels in that single moment, this moment, when Naruto screams in rage.

 

 

 

If he’d reached up, he could have pushed his hand to touch him.

 

 

Silence, deafening, as the whirring stops.

 

 

 

Naruto jumps back and collapses when Kakuzo falls, his breath fast and shallow, and Kakashi stays back, with an effort, hovering, there, where the edge of the crater with Kakuzo in it crumbles next to his feet.

He watches Choji hold Naruto up, and Ino start to heal Naruto, congratulate him for being clever.

Hears Tenzou applaud him for managing a third of these… rasen shuriken.

 

 

Kakashi blinks, reaching, with his whole being. I guess it’s time to pass the torch… he’s surpassed me. Can you see it, Sensei? He blinks again, swallowing harshly, his thoughts turning to another Sensei. And you, Jiraiya… wherever you are. Can you sense it?

 

Some sixth sense makes him look back, to the group, and Naruto looks up, his once more blue eyes locking with Kakashi’s right.

Light glints off his eye, like a falling star passing over it and Kakashi swallows, amending the thought. And you, can you sense it? You are always before his eyes… inspiring him. You make him strong. You do know that, don’t you, Sasuke?

 

He closes his eyes for a moment, hearing Tenzou call for them to head back. 

Knowing what he has to do.

 

He jumps down to the still writhing head, watching it gurgle for a moment. 

Kakuzo grates the words out, almost non-understandable without the breath to actually speak them. “Urgh… defeated by a bunch of brats.”

Kakashi smirks, meanly. “Well, you did fight the first hokage. I guess I can’t blame you for seeing us as kids. But it goes two ways. For our eyes, your just an old geezer gone wrong.” He clicks his tongue, making his voice soft, gentle, knowing it’ll grate more. “And here you are dying, hugging the earth like a worm.”

He lets a final chidori flare up, saying the words with glee, the sadness bordering on devastation he had felt back then when he had fought Kabuto missing completely. “One by one the new generation will catch up to you… and they will all surpass you in the end.” 

 

He punches through the head, watches it burst, ignoring the spatters of blood and tissue on his clothes. His voice is dark, shivering with truth. And a promise, for a dead friend. “And I… I am far from done either.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Tsunade stares at them, the weight of her gaze gliding over their bodies like a touch, pressing.

Assessing.

 

Kakashi watches her frown, watches her clasp her hands. 

Her tone is kind, calm. Grounded. “Well done, people.” She hesitates for a split second. “But it’s not time to celebrate yet.” 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, knowing she wouldn’t throw a party for them right now anyways. But that she needs to stay aloof nonetheless. Though he can see that it’s costing her, too.

She sighs, continuing. “Not when there are still more of the Akatsuki at large.” She raises her eyebrows. “Team two, I grant you leave.”

Next to him, Shikamaru starts. “But…”

Tsunade glowers at him, until he subsides. She clicks her tongue. “Dismissed, both teams. Go eat something. Kakashi, Yamato, please stay for a moment.”

 

There is a moment of nothing, and then quiet steps and the rustling of cloth as Choji and Ino leave with Sakura and Sai. Shikamaru hovers for a moment longer, and Kakashi turns to him, watches him press his lips together, grimly. And then straighten his shoulders, with an effort.

Naruto steps around him, his left hand coming up to Shikamaru’s shoulder, squeezing. Shikamaru shoots him a quick smile, and then turns, walking out of the office with sure, quiet steps. 

Silence falls, as all four look at his retreating back.

 

Tsunade hums, addressing Naruto. “I’d thought you of all people would go for food first, brat.”

Naruto tilts his head to her, and then smiles softly, though his eyes carry sadness. He nods, swallowing. “I will, baa-chan.” He looks back up, catches Kakashi’s eyes for a moment. 

And then he reaches up, with a small, wry smirk, tugging at Kakashi’s torn mask, ignoring Kakashi’s flabbergasted stare. And Tenzou’s gasp, ending in a cough to hide startled astonishment.

Kakashi cannot breathe.

Naruto grins softly, a mix between sadness and amusement, just for a moment, and then sobers again, quirking his eyebrow, tone wistful. “Guess part of the mask has come off, eh, Sensei?” His left hand comes up, to push the hair hanging into Kakashi’s face away, only to hover over Kakashi’s closed left eye. His voice is a whisper now. “Such a shame that you hide so much of yourself.”

 Kakashi glowers at him, ignoring Tenzou, who is desperately trying to sober up again, and Tsunade, who is watching rather intently. 

And who leans forward suddenly, flipping her finger against Naruto’s right arm. 

He hisses, grimacing, and she glowers at him. “Go get healing.“ Her gaze softens a bit. “You brat.”

He exhales, obviously breathing through pain, and then nods, turning towards the door. 

 

 

Tsunade waits until he’s closed it behind himself, before addressing Kakashi. “What the hell was that?”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, still reeling emotionally. “And what the hell was that with his arm?”

Tsunade narrows her eyes. 

Tenzou steps forward, looking back and forth between them, before clearing his throat. “He seems to be quite confident in his relations to Kakashi.”

Tsunade snorts. “No shit.” She tilts her head, watching Kakashi carefully. “How do you feel about that.”

Kakashi grimaces, shifting to his other foot. He shrugs, and then sighs, deeply. “I don’t know. I…” He hesitates, looking out of the window for a long moment. Knowing Tenzou knows a lot, and trying to find the right words. He clears his throat. “I try to slow down.” He grimaces, hoping against all hope that she’ll let it lie. “We’ve discussed that.”

“Hmmm.” Tsunade taps her finger on the desk, her hazel eyes swiveling to Tenzou. “What are your thoughts on the matter?”

Tenzou blanches, and opens his mouth, only to grimace a bit. “I believe it’s none of my business?”

Kakashi shoots him a look, privately proud, but knowing Tsunade won’t let it stand, and, sure enough, she just snorts. “Try again.”

Tenzou sighs, deeply, and then shoots an apologetic look towards Kakashi.

Who waves at him, with a sigh of his own. “Go on. Do tell.” Dig my grave. He leans back, crossing his arms, grimacing when the sticky cloth tugs at his skin.

Tenzou clears his throat. “Alright. So… in my opinion…” He hesitates, and then squares his shoulders, his voice firmer. “I believe Kakashi is holding up formidably, which is becoming increasingly difficult though, since Naruto seems to want to be closer.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away. For a moment, he swears he can feel Naruto’s warm breath, under his chin. And the weight of his limbs, against his.

 

Tsunade exhales softly, leaning back in her chair. “He wants to be closer?”

Tenzou nods. “He is quite aware of the pull, and, as a typical teenager, he wants to know what exactly it is.” Tenzou hesitates, and Kakashi frowns, looking at him. Right. That plays into it as well. Tenzou shifts again, obviously uncomfortable. “If… I understand it correctly he has some experience already, so he’s not going into it oblivious in a totally kind of way”, Kakashi grimaces, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment, and Tenzou continues, words rushed now, obviously wanting it all out, “and he is actively encouraging… let’s say contact.”

Kakashi blinks, staring at him. What do you mean… actively?

Tsunade tilts her head. “Actively encouraging?”

Tenzou licks his lips, shooting an apologetic gaze at Kakashi. “When Kakashi carried Naruto the other day, he was awake for part of the trip. I saw him nestle back in, not interrupting our discussion. And when we fought the Akatsuki he made sure to lock eyes with Kakashi. Several times. He also hugs him, whenever he can get away with it. Guy-san has told me that Naruto also protects Kakashi with bunshins, and even prevents the fox from attacking him.” He shrugs and Kakashi blinks, slowly. “And you saw this just now?”

Tsunade narrows her eyes, shooting a look at Kakashi, a weird expression on her face. “Thoughts?”

Kakashi opens his mouth, and then closes it again, slowly. Answering honestly. “None.”

Tenzou sighs, and grimaces, tone apologetic. “I know that it is only sensible to want to slow down, given his age, but I feel like Kakashi might fight a losing battle here. Especially given recent…” 

Kakashi glowers at him and Tenzou falls silent, fidgeting.

Tsunade raises her eyebrows, prompting. “Recent?”

Silence, as Tenzou tries to look everywhere but at her.

Tsunade hums, looking at him for a long moment, and then nods at the door. “Thank you, Yamato.”

Tenzou nods, hastily retreating afterwards.

 

Kakashi feels done.

 

Tsunade sighs, leaning forward to lean on her elbows, rubbing her temples. Her voice is low. “If I ask what happened recently, will I get an answer.”

Kakashi snorts, and then hisses. “Actually, nothing happened. I carried him home, thinking him passed out, and I ended up sleeping with him in my arms. I tried to leave, but he clung to me and insisted on me staying. It happened a few times. Just… sleeping. I realized though that I wan…” He trails off, blushing, furiously. 

She inhales, deeply, nodding at herself. “Ah.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, feeling flayed open, and like crying. He sniffs, his voice almost inaudible. “You tried to remove me from the equation by giving them to Tenzou, but… It is a losing battle.” He reopens his eyes to her soft, and understanding smile. 

Her voice carries her affection. “It always was, Kakashi. I knew that. Jiraiya knew that. We knew that.”

He sniffs again, looking out of the window for a moment.

 

Tsunade clears her throat again, following his gaze outside. “Still. He is still alive, Kakashi. That has to account for a lot of the difficulties that him being alive brings with it.”

Kakashi snorts, heavily, a tear dropping. His voice is a hiss. “Yes. But they’re coming for him.”

She hums, her hand reaching up to cup her upper arm for a moment. “But you managed to make him strong.”

He blinks, rapidly, sniffing again. “Strong enough for them though? They killed Asuma. Just like that.” He shoots her a look. “And he obviously hurt himself using this new jutsu he created.”

She frowns, looking away, and then nods. “Yes. And it isn’t an easy injury.” She sighs, waving her hand. “But we’ll see about that later, when I’ve had a chance to look at it all properly. For now…” She raises her eyebrows, her voice changing, just slightly. “I want you to wash up, don the jonin armor of the reliable Sensei, and a new mask, and go and meet with your team for dinner. Catch their emotional fallout, because there is bound to be some. I bet you find them at Ichiraku’s.”

Kakashi frowns, staring at her for a moment. “You’re going to send me away again.”

Tsunade shakes her head, with a sigh. “You’re too clever for your own good.” She hums, and nods. “Yes. With Kurenai’s team, in two days. We have received intelligence of a possible hideout of Orochimaru’s. I need you to follow up on that trail.” She hesitates, and then adds, with a small smirk. “Also, Jiraiya sent word he’d be back.”

Kakashi swallows, something in him relaxing a bit. “That’s good. He needs to train Naruto a bit more.”

Tsunade nods, eyes narrowing. “Yes. Now that the boy has managed to surpass his father in regards to the rasengan we need to get him ready to try to use senjutsu.” She tilts her head. “Do you think he could master sage mode?”

Kakashi shrugs, and then smiles, a small, true smile. “I… don’t know.” He locks his eyes with hers. “But I have faith.”

She echoes his smile. “So do I.” She quirks an eyebrow. “And the healing properties of it would make that new jutsu actually usable, I bet.”

Kakashi frowns, while turning to the door. Yes. That, too.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The smell or ramen once more, by now connected tightly to his feelings.

Making him smile, softly, and wobbly.

 

In another reality, I would be smelling your tobacco now, while you lament that you have to invite your team to dinner. 

 

He hesitates, watching as Naruto tries to eat with his left hand, rather unsuccessfully, and as Sakura resolves to help him, only to be beaten to it by Sai, to Naruto’s obvious ire.

Sees through the curtains how flustered Naruto is by the prospect of being fed by Sakura.

There is a feeling in his gut he doesn’t dare name.

 

He follows it nonetheless, appearing behind Sakura and Naruto. “Hey!”

Sakura’s gaze flies back to him, obviously relieved. While also obviously flustered. Now that’s interesting. She scoots over and he quirks an eyebrow, following the invitation and squeezing in between Naruto and her. He clears his throat, silently. “What’s all the commotion?”

Naruto’s eyes snap to his, and then over to Sakura, and then back to Kakashi. He blushes just a bit, with a pout. “Sakura wanted to feed me.”

Sai chimes up, from the other side, exuberantly. “A friend in need is a friend in need. Or so the book says.”

Kakashi almost snorts as Naruto’s head swivels round and he gripes at him. He watches the body language for a moment, noting how Naruto seems to vibrate with energy. So. You wanted Sakura to feed you? But not Sai? Is it curiosity? Teenage-want-to-know? Or more? He tilts his head back just a bit, to the kunoichi on his other side, noting her stiff back and shoulders. But while Sakura offered she wasn’t too comfortable with it. He quirks and eyebrow. I wonder how you’ll react if I…

He blinks, reaching for the bowl. “I see.” He clicks his tongue, giving Naruto an eye-smile. “Let me.”

Naruto blinks at him. For a moment the world drops away, and Kakashi can see Naruto’s pupils dilate, before he says: “You, Sensei?”

Kakashi swallows, and reaches for the chopsticks.

Naruto takes the first mouthful, and then crosses his arms, chewing with a definite pout and his face turned away. Kakashi narrows his eye, while Sakura snickers soundlessly behind him. Really… pretending not to like this? You little imp. Out loud he makes his voice soft again, vaguely sing-song. “Now, come on, Naruto, open wide.”

The whiskers twitch in a helpless grin, right before Naruto does as instructed, and Kakashi pushes another mouthful of noodles in, holding the bowl out for Naruto to slurp them in without making a mess. He’s aware of two sets of eyes watching them, but it’s weird, reality tuned out. Breathless, in a way that has nothing to do with chewing food.

Kakashi fights to keep his hand steady, suddenly furious at himself. Get a fucking grip. Not everything between you should be fraught with meaning, you know that. And weren’t you the one trying to slow down?

Naruto leans in, effectively dispelling the thought, his voice low. “Can I have some meat?” He licks his lips. “Sensei?”

Kakashi shivers, and nods, refusing to dwell on any double meaning, mutely. 

The air seems to heat up.

His brain is empty.

 

Behind him, Sakura clears her throat, and then asks, obviously deliberately chipper. Pulling him out of whatever funk he was caught in. “Sensei Kakashi, how are you even out of bed?”

He almost snorts. Ha, good one. And something that Asuma would have teased me with, too. He pretends to be a bit pissed off, glad for the distraction. “Why does everyone keep asking that?”

She swings her feet, blushing, and he lets her squirm a bit, before sighing. “I didn’t even need to use my Mangekyo this time…” He grimaces, his voice lowering, scooping up the last noodles for Naruto. “But if you wouldn’t have showed up when you did… I would have needed to.” He raises his eye to Naruto, locks it with blue. “And then I would be in bed at the hospital now.”

Naruto swallows, and then turns away a bit, staring unseeing on the counter, probably remembering that one time he visited Kakashi in a hospital bed. Just as Kakashi does, vividly.

Sakura sniffs behind them. “Last time you were in hospital, Sensei Asuma was there to visit you, too.”

Kakashi grimaces, with a sad smile. “He was.” He swallows. “He was a good friend.” A very good friend. For a moment, he can almost smell the tobacco in the air, again, and aftershave, his smell. Kakashi blinks, rapidly.

Sakura stares at her hands. “I feel guilty sitting here and laughing.”

Sai pipes up, tone light. “Survivor’s guilt. We don’t know what to do with the fact that we survived and he did not.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, hears the quiet gasp and dry laugh from Sakura.

Naruto’s voice is toneless. “I should have mastered the jutsu sooner. I bet baa-chan would have let me go with them then.”

Kakashi’s eye opens to Sai’s dry. “So why didn’t you?”

Naruto’s eyes flash and Kakashi hastily interjects, shooting Sai a withering look, before placing his hand onto Naruto’s left arm. “Mah, mah, Naruto. You managed as fast as you could, faster than anybody would have thought you could.” He sighs quietly, letting his sincerity color his voice, when he sees Naruto’s face darken even further. “You’re strong, Naruto.” He hesitates for a moment, voice soft. “You may even surpass me.”

 

Silence, as all three stare at him, probably gauging if he means it. Kakashi tilts his head, making his voice imploring, willing Naruto to understand. “Thing is - the more profound the jutsu… the riskier it is to wield. Just remember that.” And it is a wonder you managed this fast in any case. I needed so much longer for chidori. 

For a moment, his hand hurts, with all the scars and cuts and broken bones it had over the years. 

He swallows, clearing his throat, silently. "And… we mustn’t let his death be in vain. We must live, and fulfill his will…“ Protect his child. Kakashi tries to relax. "Survivor‘s guilt will tear at you, it will eat at you, but you must find a way to accept it. Find a way to deal.“ Easier said then done though, and I know that, too well. He swallows, and then smiles, brightly, a bit forced, but knowing his words are true. "Asuma would have our hides if we didn’t go and find a way to draw strength from it.“

Naruto sniffs, and Sai blinks, while Sakura exhales shudderingly. 

 

Her voice comes a bit haltingly. "What about Sensei Kurenai? Will she be alright?“ He turns to her and her green eyes blink up to him, huge and sad. "I heard…“

She grimaces, and he sighs through his nose, once. "Yes. They were bonded.“

Naruto chimes up, his frown clearly in his voice. "Bonded?“

Kakashi frowns in turn, staring at him. He hesitates for a split second. "You… don’t know?“ That can’t be right. You must know??

Sakura groans, fire once more in her voice. "Oh come on, Naruto, you asked me about the tattoos, remember?“

Something indecipherable passes over Naruto’s face. His voice carries a weird inflection. “I remember.“

Kakashi’s frown deepens, something fluttering in his stomach. What… I don’t understand. "So… you do know about the bond that can be proven by the tattoos.“ Didn’t you…

Naruto stares at him, totally ignoring Sakura and Sai, who are listening intently now. Sensing something is up. He clicks his tongue. "I… thought it was different things.“

Sakura rolls her eyes, while Kakashi stares. Her voice is indignant. “Baka, of course not, I told you, the bond engages, and the tattoos go black, and you know that you are soul-m…“

Kakashi interjects, rudely. "What do you mean, different things.“

Naruto blinks up to him, eyes wide. "I…“ He licks his lips, blushing a bit. "I thought my bond was with Sasuke, while…“

He trails off. 

Silence, as Kakashi tries to understand. But you said you want to be closer to me. You know about my tattoo and my connection to you. The things I cannot talk about. That we have to resist it. That… And then the memory comes, Jiraiya‘s coice echoing through his mind. ‘I don’t think he has realized what your tattoo means yet. I mean, how could he? His tattoo, his seal is black after all, it doesn’t have the same gradient.‘

Kakashi freezes, everything in him coming to a screeching halt.

 

The thought is painful, searing in its fatality. But while you enjoy the pull to me, and allow and encourage it even, it is Sasuke you… He blinks, the word cutting through his soul. …want. It’s him you hurt for. You even told me, and I just thought you meant it as a teammate that should come back, but you actually tried to tell me the other day, didn’t you. It’s why you thought it was different things. You like me well enough, love me, even, enough to want me close, enough to let it bleed into more, probably, but… 

 

Sakura groans, ripping Kakashi from his thoughts. "No, silly, then he wouldn’t have left, those with an active soul-bond are more or less inseparable. Your tattoo is black after all? So, you must have met your soul-mate? And if they have a tattoo it’s black also. Guess you just have to find them.“

Kakashi swallows, trying to keep on breathing, feeling terribly light-headed. Or getting blacker. But you don’t know about the time-delay. It’s extremely rare and… you haven’t connected those dots. He blinks. But now… now you think you know that it cannot be me, either, right? Because of the gradient. And you think you know it cannot be Sasuke either. And… it hurts. 

 

I know it hurts. 

 

It HURTS. 

 

 

He can see Naruto’s face fall as if in slow-motion, the expression shattering. His voice, when it finally comes is small, quivering. "I see.“

Kakashi cannot breathe, the waves and waves of pain coming off of Naruto tangible and destructive.

He wants to soothe it, needs to soothe it, even. 

The need to extend comfort to Naruto is irresistible. 

Necessary.

 

And so Kakashi, so help him god, says, fatalistically, helplessly, with a voice he doesn’t recognize as his own: "There’s love outside bonds, you know.“

Naruto’s eyes snap to his and Kakashi forces himself to smile, to fucking support. "I promise.“

I’ve experienced it, even.

 

And he smiles the urge to throw up away, smiles and smiles and smiles until Naruto relaxes, just a bit. 

 

Naruto blinks at him, asking, hesitantly, so low Kakashi has to strain to hear it, too low for Sakura or Sai. "Do you think Sasuke thinks so, too?“

And Kakashi wants to curse, wants to yell, wants to shake Naruto, and tell him that he lo…

 

And Kakashi nods, once, reaching out to ruffle Naruto’s hair with a shaking hand, and with his voice almost steady,  knowing he’s driving Naruto towards Sasuke. "I‘m sure.“

 

 

And his heart screams. 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi watches from afar as Shikamaru leaves the graveyard, watches Kurenai stare after him.

Her red eyes blink, slowly, and then lock on his, unerringly. 

Kakashi exhales, and jumps over.

 

For a moment, neither says anything.

Kakashi’s throat clicks when he speaks. “Kurenai. How…” He blinks, frowning, unable to finish the question.

Kurenai reaches out, squeezes his arm, taking the need to ask from him. “I’m 11 weeks along now. The Godaime says she’ll personally see to me and the baby.” She sniffs, looking away for a moment, her red eyes burning. “I miss him so much, but at the same time…” She scrunches her eyes shut, and he thinks she’ll cry but she straightens up again, with an effort, staring at him almost wildly. Her voice quivers. “Did you know - the more sorrow a mother has during pregnancy, the more the child’s brain structure is changed, too?” She hisses, lifting her chin. “The more stress I have, the more pain… it will affect her adversely.” She smirks, viciously. “I won’t let that happen.”

Kakashi nods, and then smirks, too, with an effort. “Absolutely.” And I know how hard that must be. He quirks an eyebrow, and then shakes his head once. “Her?”

Kurenai shrugs. “Gut feeling.”

“Ah.” He exhales, and then manages an honest little smile. “He’d… he will love that.”

She smiles, broadly, though there are tears in her eyes. “I know.”

Kakashi swallows. “I… he made me promise to take care of you and… her.”

Kurenai shoots him a look, her eyes huge and brimming with sorrow, though her voice is laced with humor and affection, and love. “Well, between you, Shikamaru and the Godaime we’re well settled then.”

Kakashi crosses his arms against the pain, and nods, silently.

Kurenai steps up to him and draws him into an embrace, and he sinks into it, extending and receiving comfort, while his mask gets wet by both their tears. 

 

She steps back, eventually, with a mock-annoyed hiss. “Great, now I cried after all.”

Kakashi snorts, and then wipes his own eyes, pushing the hitai-ate up in the process. 

Kurenai hums, with a dash of humor in her tone. “Look, you even have a red eye, like I do, and a dark one, like he did. You’re the perfect godfather.”

Kakashi grimaces, face twisting in abject but beautiful pain for a moment, before he pulls himself together, nodding once. “I… thank you.”

Kurenai places a hand to his cheek, her thumb stroking softly. “You better believe it.”

Kakashi sniffs, and then shrugs his shoulder. “I better start looking for presents then.”

Kurenai chuckles. “Ahhhh, you have a bit more than 6 months left for that. Easy peasy.”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Not if it has to be perfect.” He looks up at the laden sky, the clouds blowing by today. “She’ll be a spring child.”

Kurenai nods. “Yes, the date is in May. She’ll bring my life and hope back. My sun.” Her voice sounds faraway, her hand coming up to cover her shoulder for a moment, where Kakashi knows is her tattoo. “She’s my future.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, and says her name. “Mirai.”

And Kurenai smiles, brilliantly. “Yes.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He wakes up, knowing suddenly, and goes back, alone, not asking, in the dead of night. 

Searches, until he finds them, after hours of looking and sifting through dirt.

One is still clenched in severed flesh, even.

 

He folds them into his spare mask, gently, and puts them into his bag, right next to Icha Icha. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Jiraiya is laying on his couch, snoring, when he gets back.

 

Kakashi stares at him, for a long moment, and then chuckles, softly, the first real chuckle in days, shaking his head.

He pulls the package from his bag and puts it into the bookshelf, watching the long white hair shift as Jiraiya mumbles something and turns, slightly. 

Kakashi rolls his eyes. Well at least he’s not in my bed. I wouldn’t put it past him. He swallows, remembering that Naruto slept in the spot Jiraiya is in, just a while ago. 

 

He hesitates and watches Jiraiya for a long moment, before turning and going for a shower, knowing he’ll wake him and dreading and yearning for it in equal measure.

 

The tiles are too cold, and the water too hot.

And too salty.

 

Jiraiya’s voice easily fills the small space, drowns out the sound of falling water. “I heard what happened.”

Kakashi nods, tilting his face up into the spray, silently.

There is a moment of nothing, and then Jiraiya embraces him from behind, still clothed, one big hand coming up to press over Kakashi’s heart. His face presses into the crown of Kakashi’s head. “I’m sorry.”

Kakashi gasps soundlessly, mouth twisting into a snarl. He shakes his head, voice almost inaudible. “He’ll never even meet his child.” He shivers, and Jiraiya reaches out to turn the temperature up, and then drags him back, with his other arm around his chest, too.

His voice is a whisper, next to Kakashi’s ear. “What else?”

Kakashi snorts. “Isn’t that more than enough?”

Jiraiya chuckles, and then bites at Kakashi’s ear, lightly. “I know you.”

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, sobbing, once. He shakes his head, gasping, forcing the words out, tasting like acid in his mouth. “Naruto thought his bond was with Sasuke, and he thinks that my tattoo not being completely black also means it’s not with me, either, and…”

Jiraiya hums, and then turns him, bodily, pressing him into the cold wall. Kakashi shivers, but falls silent, pressed and held between heat and chill. Jiraiya’s voice is filled with understanding. “And you haven’t corrected him because you know you need to slow down still.” He clicks his tongue, one hand coming up to push the wet hair out of Kakashi’s face. “And if you told him… “

Kakashi closes his eyes, the streaming water washing his tears away. The words are ash, torn from his mouth. “If I told him he would come to me and I… couldn’t resist anymore.” And I have to. I… have to. Just a little bit longer.

Jiraiya hums, the vibrations traveling through them both. He clicks his tongue. “So, what did you say?”

Kakashi snorts, mouth twisting painfully. “I told him there’s love outside bonds.”

 

Jiraiya smiles softly, and then bends down, to breathe the words against Kakashi’s lips. “And there is.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“You always seem to pick up some of my pieces.”

Jiraiya chuckles, lazily shifting to look at Kakashi. "And vice versa.“ Kakashi frowns and Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow. "Do you really think you‘re the only one in need of comfort? The only one to need a reprieve from longing?“

Kakashi blinks, swallowing, his tone gruff. "No.“ He shakes his head. "Sorry.“

Jiraiya hums. "Don’t be. I know it’s hard right now.“ He sighs, leaning back, his white hair everywhere. Kakashi snorts, and starts playing with a strand of it, the chakra flowing through it tickling his skin.

He clicks his tongue, shooting Jiraiya a look. “This transformation of your hair, it’s based in senjutsu, isn’t it?”

Jiraiya weighs his head. “Yes and no. It is a natural energy based jutsu, but I only take a tiny portion of it to channel it into a body modification jutsu if needed.”

Kakashi grins. “I’d love to see you fighting with it.”

Jiraiya snorts. “No you don’t. Getting the little needles out of everything is a pest, after.” He chuckles, and Kakashi chimes in, lowering onto his front and crossed arms in the small gap between Jiraiya’s body and the wall after, watching Jiraiya’s face. 

He looks at the sage markings, quirking an eyebrow. “I saw that picture, you already had the markings when you were young…”

Jiraiya chuckles, rolling his eyes, something youthful and playful and vulnerable flitting over his face. “Yeah, well, I always wanted to be a sage and get the marks, though that is a bit random if any. Right. And so I…” He shrugs. “Hiruzen always told me I had just enough chakra reserves to possibly master it, and so…” He smiles softly. “I dreamed.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “And used makeup.”

Kakashi grins, broadly, belying his words. “Lots of shinobi use markings?”

Jiraiya rolls his eyes. “Yeah, but I used my mother’s makeup.” He clears his throat to Kakashi’s chuckles. “At first at least.”

Kakashi hums, watching his eyes. “Who were your parents?”

Jiraiya blinks, and then looks away, for a long moment. “I… I never really met them. I only had these few items of them left as a kid. A box, with some of her makeup, and some of his kunais. A photo. I think Sora has it now. It was all the war left me.” He smiles softly, gaze faraway. “I grew up with Tsunade the first years.” He chuckles. “I guess that’s why she never… And of course… Then I lived with Sora for a while, though she was hardly old enough to care for me… then, alone I mean.”

 

Kakashi frowns, pushing himself up a bit. “So you knew the founding fathers, too?”

Jiraiya smirks softly. “Well, I mean, I was just 5 when Hashirama died, knowing might be a bit of a stretch. I was a few years older when Tobirama died.”

Kakashi stares at him, with a frown, something tickling down his spine, repeating. Like Tsunade. “Who were your parents?”

Jiraiya grunts, rolling his eyes. “My mother was a ninja from Iwagakure, her name was Raiya. My father’s name was Kikaru.” Kakashi tilts his head, silently waiting, knowing more is to come. Jiraiya groans, before continuing, almost defiantly. “He was Tobirama’s son.”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, somehow not even surprised. “You’re Tobirama-sama’s grandson.” That explains a lot. And you don’t want people to know… why?

Jiraiya glowers at him, tone gruff. “So what.”

Kakashi stares at him, something dropping into place. “Tobirama didn’t come by to only look after Tsunade. He came by for you as well. Whenever he could.”

Jiraiya pulls a face, swallowing. “Guess Sora told you that?”

Kakashi shrugs. “Tsunade.” 

Jiraiya nods, and then smirks, a bit painfully. “I guess I cannot be mad at her for telling… I… My parents both died very young. And then he died, too, a few years after Hashirama.” He clicks his tongue. “And we were too young still, and so Hiruzen became Hokage.”

Kakashi tilts his head. “That’s why you knew about the temporal lock right away, and the hiraishin kunais… You told Minato to look into your grandfather’s jutsus.”

Jiraiya grins, broadly, a bit forced. “And so the wheels turn.” He sobers and swallows, with a sigh. “I wrote my very first book, you know, before the first published Icha Icha, because of my experiences with tragedy and in war. I couldn’t… “ He grimaces. “I couldn’t believe the cycle would just repeat, and repeat, and repeat…”

He trails off, and Kakashi is silent for a long moment, remembering his own losses. He sniffs, and then nods, tone raw. “Do you really think he’ll be able to break the cycle?”

Jiraiya hums, gaze faraway for a moment. “I have hope.”

Kakashi nods, more to himself. He blinks up at Jiraiya with a frown. “Will you train him some more?”

Jiraiya nods, the motion pulling the strand of hair from between Kakashi’s fingers. “Yes. As long as I can.”

Kakashi frowns, the words tasting like ash. “You’re still hunting them.”

Jiraiya weighs his head. “I’m still trying to find a way into Amegakure. They’ve locked the village.”

Kakashi frowns. “Locked?”

Jiraiya looks at him. “The rain now is impenetrable. I’m trying to find an entrance to it. I have toads looking for weaknesses.”

Kakashi grimaces. “I see.” He quirks an eyebrow. “You think Nagato is still and really there?”

Jiraiya shrugs. “I don’t know.” He clicks his tongue. “We’ll see.”

 

There is a pause where Jiraiya just stares into space, and Kakashi lets him, watching the emotions pass over the agile face.

 

Jiraiya eventually clears his throat, and shoots him a look. “Is me dragging Naruto off alright with you?”

Kakashi snorts, hiding the instinctual repulsion. “Yes of course, why not?”

Jiraiya tilts his head, rather meaningfully. 

Kakashi sighs. “Right now, I don’t know if his interest was really the bond, or…” 

He grimaces and Jiraiya continues, voice filled with affection and understanding. “Or teenage horny interest?”

Kakashi pulls a face, a definitely bad taste in his mouth. “Yes.”

Jiraiya hums. “Interest is interest though, Kakashi, don’t be too hard on yourself.” He reaches out, tugs at a strand of Kakashi’s hair. “You’re pretty enough, don’t think he doesn’t notice that.” Jiraiya winks at him. “You yourself told me he likes pretty things.” 

Kakashi blushes, furiously, and then swats his hand away, lightly. 

Jiraiya smirks, and then sobers, locking his gaze with Kakashi’s. "But I sincerely doubt that this was all that there is to it.“

Kakashi swallows, his voice gruff. "You’re going to tease me like hell when the bond finally engages, aren’t you?“ He hesitates. "I mean, if it ever fulfills itself.“

Jiraiya grins. "Absolutely.“ He winks, reaching to clasp Kakashi’s shoulder. "And when. Not if.“

Kakashi inhales shudderingly. "If you say so.“

Jiraiya hums, gaze falling to his upper arm for a moment. “First, that seal will unlock though. Have you checked what the status is there?”

Kakashi frowns, looking away. “Last… Last I checked the intervals were already quite short, yes.”

Jiraiya’s eyes twinkle. “I wonder what memories it’ll bring.”

Kakashi gasps a laugh. “You think it’ll only release memories?”

Jiraiya weighs his head, tone doubtful. “I’m not sure. Maybe, maybe not. Something, definitely.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Great.”

Jiraiya smirks, the smile turning… lewd. "Now. How about a last memory for me before I go out and train the not-so-little-anymore rascal again?“

Kakashi snorts, and shakes his head before crawling up, suggestively, stomach fluttering in anticipation. "Sure.“

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi watches Jiraiya go, shares a last small smile with him, full of humor and warmth. 

 

Somewhere, there is a chime in the air, like a bell, tolling. 

 

 

 

 

And Kakashi shivers. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 28: Love that screams darkness

Notes:

Tags added ;), bc. that will start off here… And: Just hooking into the Guren/three-tails fight here a tiny bit since it’s considered a filler? So maybe some of you have skipped it… but I wanted to pick at some things in it (here and later) 😏

Also references to ‘The Lost Tower’.

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

 

Hinata is quiet and sure, her lilac eyes attentive.

Kakashi smiles to himself, sharing a look with Shino’s hidden gaze. Akamaru races before them, and Kiba grins.

 

They enter the hideout carefully, Kakashi’s neck prickling. 

The air is rank with copper and pain, a sharp, and ugly stench. Death. Lots of it.

Kakashi grimaces, silently signaling to search for traps.

 

Escaping the explosion is something that is way too close for Kakashi’s tastes. 

Still, we’re alive. That has to suffice.

 

Shino sends his insects and Kakashi grits his teeth, something violet-pink and glassy and beautiful and horrific glinting between the trees.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He should have known Naruto would be able to talk Tsunade into letting him join them, but then again Kakashi is not exactly furious about seeing him again.

 

Though it’s a weird mixture of relief, affection, longing and… reservation.

Naruto smiles at him, a quick, slightly pinched smile.

Kakashi exhales, in a rush.

 

What do you think of me now… do you hate me? Loathe me? Find me disgusting? 

Find my… need to be close revolting?

 

Have your feelings changed? 

 

Have they stayed the same?

 

Kakashi blinks, refocusing on the mission, with an effort.

He is glad when Tenzou, Sakura, and Sai join too.

 

But defeating Guren and Gozu proves to be almost impossible, the crystal nature jutsus extremely formidable, especially aided with the earth style.

Kakashi snarls behind his mask. 

 

Though Naruto screaming his name when Guren manages to pierce his back is almost enough to make him forget the pain.

Something in him loosens again, unclenches.

Something much more fragile than flesh and bone.

 

 

When Naruto disappears Kakashi reaches, desperately. Feeling void. 

He tries to keep his voice quiet, sure, hashing out a plan. 

 

All hell breaks loose, as the three-tails rages.

 

Kakashi cannot say if he is relieved when Naruto forces the three-tails underwater, just that he can breathe again.

 

Same old, same old.

 

 

He clicks his tongue, the words dripping off it, taking the weight of eons with them. “Let’s go home.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Debriefing and hospital check-up, and then they are sent off for dinner.

 

Kakashi catches Naruto’s eyes for an instant, by chance, before Naruto turns and goes for ramen, of course, with his friends. With Hinata, who is laughing up at him, with Kiba, who yells at him, with Shino, trailing along silently, and with Sakura, who has her elbow loped through Hinata’s. And Sai, who watches them, with that smirk that used to be soul-less, but is actually anything but. And Ino, who is blushing when she looks at Sai.

 

Shizune’s eyes watch him, kind.

 

He exhales, and smiles his patent, reliable, sensible eye-smile, and turns his feet home, with an effort.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

There is a knock on the door, later. 

Much later. Dead-of-night later.

 

Kakashi gets up from the couch where he’d been waiting, waiting without really knowing why, but knowing who it is without needing to check nonetheless, his gut churning. He opens the door, pasting an eye-smile on, with an effort.

 

Naruto stares at him, almost up to his height now. 

Kakashi swallows, and steps back, extending his hand, silently.

 

Naruto steps in, toeing off his shoes, and then goes straight to the couch, sitting on it quietly. The click of the door when it closes is loud somehow.

 

Kakashi follows him into the room, and silently sits down in the armchair.

For a long moment, neither says anything. 

 

And then Naruto blinks, a slow blink, that decides something, somehow. His voice is soft. “I had wondered if I still wanted to be near you, you know? After that… discussion. After I realized… ” Kakashi swallows and nods, but doesn’t interrupt. Naruto smiles, a quick, painful smile, and then continues, with a shrug. “But I do.” He snorts and then his tone gentles. “I do, Sensei.”

Kakashi draws a shaking hand down his face, clearing his throat, the relief that is swamping him bottomless. “I’m… glad.” He shakes his head once, repeating. “I’m glad.”

 

Naruto’s jaw works as he looks at Kakashi, there in the dim light. “I was so afraid when Guren managed to hit you with the crystal.”

Kakashi looks away, and then shrugs, with an effort. “Yeah, well, the portion that pierced through the armor wasn’t too big though, so…” He trails off, not knowing what to say. I was terrified when you disappeared. He sniffs.

Naruto nods, looking away for a moment as well. “Ero-Sennin made me train the synchronizing jutsu with Gamakiri, the results of which you’ve seen…”

Kakashi nods, and then snorts. “Yeah, well thank you for getting us out of Guren’s crystal prison…” He frowns. “Where is Jiraiya now?”

Naruto shrugs, with small grimace. “I don’t know.” He swallows. “We… were training, and… “ A small smile flits over his face, there and gone again. “I was so tired, and he got us one of these popsicles you have to break in two, right, and we sat down back to back under a tree and…” He shrugs, his face falling again. “I must have fallen asleep. When I woke up he was gone, leaving me with a note.”

There is something in his voice.

Kakashi prompts, softly. “What note.”

Naruto blinks up to him, and then laughs, fake, with a shrug. “Ah, just that he has to leave, because he got some kind of lead, and…” He grimaces, the blue eyes filling with tears.

Kakashi watches him for a moment, and then leans forward, just slightly. “And?”

Naruto sniffs, and then leans forward as well, close enough now to touch if Kakashi would reach out. “And it said: ‘Naruto, do your best. Work hard and become Hokage.’”

 

Kakashi shivers, trying to hide it by clearing his throat, to no avail.

Naruto’s laugh is short, and painful. “So you agree.”

Kakashi grimaces, trying to keep his tone light. “Agree?”

Naruto sniffs, looking out the window. “He thinks he’s not coming back.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long, long moment, remembering the weird premonition he’d had when Jiraiya had left. “I…” He exhales, trying to find the right words. “There is a always a risk, Naruto. Maybe he just wanted to make sure.”

Naruto sends him a look that has fire in it. “Yeah, or maybe he is going into something he knows might be too big for him.” He grimaces. “Why isn’t he taking anybody along then? I don’t understand.”

Kakashi sighs, remembering Jiraiya’s comment regarding his responsibility. “Sometimes… you have to try, for the greater good, even if it means you die alone.” He shivers again, a weird kind of feeling running down his spine. He shifts, trying to dislodge it. ”Have some faith.” He clears his throat, deliberately relaxing his shoulders. “He is one of the Sannin after all.”

Naruto sniffs, and then nods, a bit forced. “Right.” He snorts, and then chuckles. “What a Sannin though.”

Kakashi smirks at him, weighing his head, with a shrug. “We all are much more than just the sum of our parts.”

Naruto grins, but then sobers. “Have you known him long?”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, remembering that first meeting, vividly. “Since you were two, so…” He shrugs. “A while.” You have Orochimaru’s scale in your brush because of him. He swallows, wondering if Naruto still uses it.

Naruto hums, watching him intently. “I keep hearing the times were different then.”

Kakashi frowns, carefully shaping the words. “We… were still hunting down enemies to revenge the Yondaime, yes.”

Naruto frowns. “But it was the fox who attacked the village?”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away for a moment. “Yes. But the Leaf could not afford to show weaknesses… at least that is what the Sandaime decided. He walked a different path than the Godaime does now.”

Naruto purses his lips, putting his elbows on his knees, and his head onto his clasped hands. “Despite him being her teacher?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, wondering if that bit of information might have dropped into Naruto’s hands directly through Jiraiya. “We learn from our Senseis, and we… adore them or loathe them, but we are not them.” He forces a little smile, carefully shaping it into an eye-smile. “You didn’t take up writing books from Sensei Jiraiya either, did you.”

Naruto snorts, with a full grin this time. “No, not writing.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, hearing what he doesn’t say, tone dry. “Only reading.”

Naruto blushes slightly, and then levels Kakashi with a heated gaze. “Just like you.”

Kakashi raises his head just a bit, allowing some playfulness to enter his tone. “Oh?”

Naruto waggles his eyebrows. “He told me.”

It’s Kakashi’s turn to blush, and he does so, deeply, to Naruto’s obvious amusement. Kakashi clears his throat, with an effort. “Yeah, well…”

Naruto grins, broadly. “Ero-Sennin also told me there was a scene in the books, just for you… what book is it, Sensei? Which chapter?”

Kakashi hadn’t thought he could blush any deeper, but he’s obviously proven wrong, his face feeling like an oven, instantly. He wheezes silently, fighting to make his voice stern. “None of your business.”

 

Naruto snickers, and then laughs, breathlessly, his eyes sparkling. The air between them heats up, somehow. 

Naruto sobers, slowly, humming. “So, glad that at least is bringing you good dreams.”

Kakashi frowns. “Good dreams?” Did… Jiraiya tell you of my nightmares?

Naruto blushes a bit, but shrugs and continues, bravely. “When we… you know, cuddled, you seemed to have a bad dream. I…” He clears his throat and then exhales, pushing the words out. “I rubbed your temple and you quieted again.”

Kakashi blinks, not knowing what to say, settling on a vague: “Thank you.”

Naruto nods, looking away a bit for a moment. His voice sounds faraway. “Dreams have power…”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, watching him. Listens to the things unsaid. “What did you dream when you were caught in that illusion in the three-tails the other day?”

Naruto’s eyes snap to his, and then away again. He shrugs. “I dreamt of Sasuke.”

Kakashi blinks, the simple statement heavy between them. He forces himself to smile. “I see.”

Naruto shoots him a look, seeing too much. “I’m sorry.”

Kakashi snorts, a real, honest snort, despite his raging feelings. “Don’t be.”

Naruto blinks at him, with those huge eyes that stare right into his very soul. “Did you ever long for someone?”

Kakashi wants to laugh, loudly, but he refrains, swallowing compulsively instead. He shakes his head, not knowing what to say. You already know almost everything I want… if that is not longing for you… what is? He gasps a laugh and then raises his eyebrows, spreading his arms, silently. 

Naruto blushes, and then licks his lips, looking away. 

Kakashi watches him, for just a moment. He blinks, slowly, tone… careful, but the words coming with the awareness of truth. “It is a heady feeling, to have this kind of power, isn’t it?” 

 

That’s why you’re here, now… that’s why we have this weird discussion. You’re testing the waters. And, typically you, you’re barging right in. Kakashi smirks to himself, wryly. 

 

Naruto’s eyes snap to his, and he stares at Kakashi, for a long moment. 

He clears his throat, and then tilts his head, whiskers twitching. His voice is a whisper. “It is.”

Kakashi bites his lips, his voice a whisper. Pushing. “Who else do you have this power over?” Want this power over?

Naruto snorts, looking away.

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, his tone dark. Two can play this game, Naruto. “I’m sure Hinata adores you, doesn’t she.”

Naruto’s gaze snaps to his again, wide and burning blue. “You think?”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, locking their gazes. Oh? His tone is almost calm, almost kind. “Interested?” Her eyes are very close to Shion’s, too.

Naruto snorts, looking away with a snarling smirk. “She’s always been nice to me.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, tilts his head. Nice… Speaks without consulting his brain. “Is nice enough for you?” God knows I’m a lot of things, but not NICE.

Naruto  glowers at him, seeming too old for his age. He grimaces, and then says, with finality. “No.” He draws his lower lips through his teeth, eyes still burning into Kakashi’s. “On the other hand, nice is a warm feeling, a place in the sun.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, drawls, despite his heart galloping. In for a dollar, in for a dime. You’re the sun.” 

Naruto blinks, slowly, obviously stopped in his tracks. “And so… you’re the moon?”

Kakashi stares at him, and then the words come, as if by themselves. “No. I’m the night.” I’m the dark, longing for the light of dawn. The heat of the sun.

Naruto narrows his eyes, following his train of thought. “So Sasuke is the moon?”

Kakashi raises both his eyebrows, voice far away, and yet dry beyond measure. Fighting for some levity. “Appearing fully every 28 days?”

Naruto laughs out, loud, freely, his laugh ringing like a bell, easy and clear and reverberating. Ending in a snicker. He shakes his head. “Oh, he’d love that.” 

Kakashi pulls a face, seriously doubting Sasuke would appreciate their designations. And their discussion. “Love?”

Naruto giggles, and then shakes his head again, waving Kakashi off. “Alright, hate, but it’s still… fitting somehow.”

 

He smirks at Kakashi and suddenly the air between them is light again, the stifling weight of the words just seconds before gone.

Naruto leans back, with a sigh, his eyes sparkling. “So, Sensei, if you’re the night, your hair is the stars? The milky way?”

Kakashi snorts, looking away for a moment, letting his voice carry his … careful amusement. “My hair is the lightning that falls from the thunderstorm clouds hiding the stars.”

“Mhhhhh.” Naruto nods slowly, still smirking, but blinking rapidly. “That’s fitting.”

Kakashi shoots him a deliberately playful withering look. “So happy you approve.”

Naruto giggles again. He shakes his head, shooting a look out at the dark night sky. “I wasn’t aware you had this poetic streak.”

Kakashi weighs his head, sincerely, doubting his little comment could be seen as poetic, but he shrugs, with a sigh. “I like a lot of things.” He clicks his tongue. “I read, a lot.”

Naruto frowns, looking at the bookshelves, where the Icha Icha books, and only a handful other books are. “Do you go to the library?”

Kakashi smirks softly. “No. I go…” He hesitates, and then clears his throat. “Home.”

Naruto’s eyes snap to his. “Home?”

Kakashi exhales softly, resigning himself to take Naruto there, when dawn breaks, because he knows he’s not going to get out of this one. “Yes. I always just exchange one or two books, and then leave again.”

Naruto frowns, obviously trying to process the implications. “You don’t want to stay there? But you keep it?”

Kakashi smirks, painfully, and then shrugs. “It is a bit outside the village limits. It’d be impractical.” Naruto frowns, and Kakashi continues, with a sigh. “And it is drenched in memories.” And blood.

Naruto fidgets, agitated, and Kakashi holds up his hand, forestalling him. “It’s alright. I’ll take you there when the sun rises, alright?”

Naruto blinks, something vulnerable in his gaze, and tone. “Really, Sensei?”

Kakashi nods, with a sigh. “Really.” He snorts, and then shrugs. “It’s no secret, not really.”

Naruto tilts his head. “Did you take others before?”

Kakashi looks away. “I used to live there, before…” He trails off, the words your father took me under his wings heavy on his tongue. With a hint of chocolate. He shakes his head. “I’ll tell you a bit more when we’re there, hmm?”

 

Naruto swings his legs once, foot thumping lightly against the couch. “Can’t we go now?”

Kakashi chuckles, with a shake of his head. “Don’t you want to sleep a bit?”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “I can do that later. Baa-chan gave us the day off, remember.”

Kakashi hums. “I remember.” And then he sighs, loudly, pretending. “Oh well, if you insist…” Naruto whoops and jumps up, and Kakashi chuckles, shaking his head at him. “Don’t get too excited though. It’s just an old house, with dusty books.”

Naruto makes a dismissive noise, pulling on his shoes. “It’s your house though, Sensei.”

Kakashi swallows, flipping off the light. “That it is.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Konoha is silent and the air vaguely chilly, and Kakashi discreetly signals the night watch, letting them know it’s nothing to worry about. 

Or he thinks he does it discreetly, because Naruto shoots him a look, his voice low. “They always listen to you.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “A lot of the guards are ex Anbu.”

Naruto hums, nodding once. “You were in the Anbu for a long time, too.” 

Kakashi weighs his head, leaving with Naruto through the An-gate. “A decade, more or less.” He shrugs, turning to the slightly overgrown path that will lead him towards the abandoned part of the settlements. “There are Anbu who serve longer, and those who serve less.” He shoots Naruto a look. “It depends.”

Naruto frowns, voice hesitantly. “What did it depend on for you?”

Kakashi exhales, looking up at the stars for a moment. “I wanted to be out.”

Naruto pushes a twig out of the way, not taking his eyes off Kakashi. “Why?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “You know why.” 

Naruto frowns again, heavily. “Just because of me?”

Kakashi sighs, and clicks his tongue, and then shakes his head, once. “No, not just because of you, though that is a part of it.” But it is also a big part of why I wasn’t allowed, for a long time. “But I couldn’t…” He grimaces, forcing himself to continue. “I couldn’t bear to be the chosen killer anymore.”

Naruto’s eyes are huge, and dark, his voice small. “Did you kill a lot?”

Kakashi sniffs, and swallows, with a small laugh. “Too much.”

Naruto blinks, voice careful. “How many?”

Kakashi grimaces, and then shakes his head, once. “I did not count, Naruto.” But my eye recorded every kill… And so I do know the precise amount. At least of the sharingan kills. He licks his lips, turning to take the small, overgrown path up to the house now. “I… know that we teach you to fight, and I know you have killed, but…” Times were different. We were at war, and then the hunting down of traitors… Your father killed, on a massive scale, too. He grimaces.

Naruto’s voice is soft, but heavy. “Killing stains the soul.”

Kakashi barks a laugh, hesitating at the edge of the clearing that marks his property. He closes his eyes for a moment, and then looks at Naruto, with both eyes, one visible, one hidden. “It does.”

Naruto stares at him, the blue eyes calling Kakashi to drown in them. “I don’t like it.”

Kakashi rips his gaze away, sniffs, once. And nods. “Neither do I.”

Naruto frowns, trying to read his face. “But we still do it.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Sometimes, it is necessary. As you know.”

Naruto’s frown deepens. “There has to be a way to stop it.”

Kakashi looks back at him, and then… smiles, softly. “If anyone can find it, it’s you.”

Naruto stares at him, a bit wildly. “Okay…”

Kakashi reaches out, a bit hesitantly, and then gives himself the proverbial nudge, and ruffles Naruto’s hair, gently. “I believe in you.”

Naruto ducks his head, but then playfully swats his hand away, catching it for a split second to take the sting out of it. “Thank you, Sensei.” He swallows, and then nods at the house, seeming gloomy in the dark of the vanishing stars just before dawn. “This is it?”

Kakashi nods. “This is it.”

 

Naruto steps forward, hesitating again. “It’s bigger than I thought.”

Kakashi hums, stepping around him, and slowly walking up to the door. “I think they wanted to have a big family, once upon a time.”

Naruto falls into step with him, his gaze taking everything in. “There’s at least room for 8 people here.” He tilts his head. “You let it overgrow, but kept the beams and structure in shape.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “Were you planning on returning here?”

Kakashi snorts. “No.” He shakes his head, reaching out to unlock the seal on the door. “I only keep memories here.” He tilts his head, amending. “And books.”

 Naruto’s eyes are fathomless black in the near dark of the small entranceway. “So you didn’t plan on having a family one day?”

Kakashi hesitates, some kind of sixth sense dragging its heels and waving red flags, almost frantically. “I…” He frowns, trying to put it into words. “It’s never been something I had the luxury of considering…” Though that’s not true, is it. Once upon a time, with Iruka… 

Naruto interrupts his thoughts, pushing. “But isn’t this something you’d want?” He licks his lips. “Create a family, and maybe revive your clan?”

Kakashi exhales, shudderingly, and then shrugs, forcing himself to be honest. “I… Naruto, with my… predilections I might not be able to revive my clan.”

Naruto frowns, staring at him. “But you liked that spy back then, I could see it.”

Kakashi snorts a laugh, turning on the spot, in a rare show of needing to let the energy that’s ripping him apart inside out, thank you very much. “Still…” He swallows. “I know who my soul-mate is, and…” He trails off.

Naruto stares at him, for so long Kakashi is starting to feel hot and cold all over. His voice is toneless. “You know who your soul-mate is, and yet…” He trails off, obviously bewildered.

Kakashi swallows, hearing what he doesn’t say just fine. And yet you long for me. 

Something in him SCREAMS for him to tell Naruto, NOW. He swallows the instant taste of chocolate down, cursing silently, and then nods, once, his tone gruff. “As I said. There’s love outside the bond.”

Naruto frowns, still staring at him. “But your tattoo…”

Kakashi grimaces. “It’s complicated.” Please, please don’t ask me for details. “It is part of what I can tell you, later.”

Naruto grimaces. “Ah yes, later.” He looks away. “I remember. So when will ‘later’ be?”

Kakashi draws a hand down his face. You can probably tell him in one year. He’ll connect the dots then, when it engages. Just a bit more than one year, in all likelihood. He swallows. “In a while.”

Naruto pulls a face, with a slightly pinched expression. 

 

Kakashi reaches up to place a hand on his shoulder. Makes his voice soft. “Come, Naruto. Let that… thing go for now, and I’ll show you my books, hmmm?”

Naruto nods, though it is a bit forced. And then he exhales, and rolls his shoulders, and Kakashi lights one of the wax-based lamps. Naruto clicks his tongue, tone deliberately light. “Is there more here than mere porn?”

Kakashi pretends to be hurt, pressing a fist to his chest. “Oh my, as if I would ever.”

Naruto snickers, and they both relax a bit again, and Kakashi turns to lead the way through the living room and into the room off to the side of the house. 

Naruto follows him, quietly, his voice dropping. “You removed everything else?”

Kakashi inhales, deeply, and then exhales, in a rush. “My father removed a lot of my mother’s things when she died. Except the flowers she liked. I think he wanted to remove memories that would become dead things and replace them with something living. I only had to empty out a few things when I left.”

Naruto hums. “That’s… sweet. I mean the flowers.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “I guess.” He pushes the door to the room open. “Still, I wished he’d left me more.” He grimaces, but continues, with a shrug. “I don’t even have a picture of her.”

Naruto smirks painfully. “Neither do I.”

Kakashi looks at him, thinking of the pictures he has in his apartment, carefully tucked away. “Maybe we’ll find some, someday.”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, and nods. He clears his throat, and steps up to the shelves, letting his gaze wander over the rows of books. “What did your father look like?”

Kakashi snorts. “Well, remember Chiyoh?” He shrugs, with a sigh. “Apparently a lot like me.”

"Hmm.“ Naruto quirks an eyebrow.  "Ero-Sennin says that sons often look like their fathers…“

Kakashi clicks his tongue, shooting Naruto a sideways look. Indeed. "Well, that might be true… Guy looks like his dad, too. Without the mustache.“

Naruto snorts, and then giggles. "Mustache???“

Kakashi nods, gravely. "Oh yes.“ He smirks, watching Naruto try to curb his mirth, shrugging. “But it did indeed suit him.” 

 

He puts the lamp on a chair off to the side, nodding at the book shelves. “When my father removed my mother’s things, he emptied almost all the house… but he didn’t touch her books. He put his own up with hers instead. So in a way… this is the only thing left of them that I have.” He sighs through his nose. “I spent a lot of time here.” He lets his eyes drift over the rows of books, unseeing. “He would go onto missions a lot. Had these bouts of what I now know was depression when he would lock himself away.” And I know now why, too. And I can emphasize. He swallows. “I learned to read and write rather early, and so I started to read the books to not feel so alone, one by one.”

Naruto watches him for a moment, and then turns to the shelves, reaching up to let the tips of his fingers glide along the books. “But these books are high poetry, and dictionaries, and historical texts.”

Kakashi hums. “The romance section is to the right. And there’s science books, too.”

Naruto’s hand hovers over a volume of a copy of ‘The Tale of Genji’. His voice carries astonishment. “I didn’t think there would be such a variety, and…” He steps back, to look at the shelves a bit better. “And so many?”

Kakashi smiles at him. “Yes. And I’m glad for them.”

Naruto blinks at him, and then frowns, heavily. 

Kakashi tilts his head. “What.”

Naruto opens his mouth, and then closes it again, shaking his head once. And then he exhales, raising his eyebrows, his voice careful, but firm. “You only read porn in public… to hide part of yourself.” He blinks. “To hide this part of yourself.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. Clever boy. “Very astute.”

Naruto tilts his head. “Why?” He hesitates and then continues, eyes locked to Kakashi’s. “Have you never had anyone here before? Was there never…” He trails off.

Kakashi clears his throat, grimacing a bit. “Guy used to come over, when we were still young. And I… think I told you at some point that I used to cook for my friends here.”

Naruto’s eyes light up. “Oh yes, I remember. We were cooking fish then, and you told me you’d fry it for your friends.” He turns to Kakashi, eyes dark in the low light. “Who are they?” His face falls, watching Kakashi swallow. “They’re dead, aren’t they.” His face falls, as Kakashi hesitates, sorrow passing over it. “Oh, I’m so sorry, Sensei, I didn’t mean to…”

 

Kakashi holds up his hand, glad when Naruto falls silent. He inhales deeply, trying to rein his emotions in, the emotions that are running wild indeed, with the memories just triggered. He shakes his head, once, voice gruff. “They are dead, indeed.” At least the boy I knew is dead, one way or another. 

He exhales, shudderingly, and then sits down against the wall, waiting a moment, as Naruto follows suit, sitting down next to him. Kakashi tries not to feel his body heat. “I… they were my team mates. And my Sensei would sometimes come over, too. But only, like, a handful of times.” He swallows, resisting the urge to test the seal, with an effort. “One of my team was an Uchiha, his name was Obito.” He snorts, with a shake of his head. “Though not burdened with the tragedy Sasuke experienced Obito could be quite an ass, too.” Naruto snickers, and then smirks, looking up to watch him. Kakashi shrugs, carefully mapping out her name. “Rin was the soul of our team. She and our Sensei got along like a house on fire.” Something I only realized much, much later. He snorts, speaking from his soul. “And I was an idiot.” He pulls a face, nodding to himself. “A big one.”

Naruto snickers, loudly, hands flying up to stifle it, with a blush.

Kakashi waves at him. “It’s true, you can laugh it up…” They share a chuckle, and some of the weight of history lifts, for a moment. “The problem is always that you only realize what an idiot you have been, and the errors of your ways, afterwards.”

Naruto hums, weighing his head. “That is why people should repent, instead of receiving capital punishment, right? I mean, you can’t help and repair and learn if you’re dead?”

Kakashi snorts, and shoots him a look, vaguely surprised, but then again, not. “I guess.” He grimaces. “Though tracking down culprits often results in capital punishment in our line of work nonetheless.”

Naruto stares at him. “And then they are being avenged again… A circle of hatred.”

Kakashi swallows. “Yes.” He exhales, thumping his head back against the wall. “My team was caught in one of those, too. A big one, the third war… which was more or less a retaliation effect of the second.” He grimaces, with a shrug, the words tasting like bile. “It’s where I received my sharingan.”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, tone gentle, catching on easily. “From Obito.”

Kakashi nods, with a sniff. He doesn’t hide the shiver in his voice. “I vowed to try to see the world through his eyes…” He smiles, shooting Naruto a look. “He wanted to be Hokage, too.”

 

Naruto smiles, broadly, and then reaches up, to push Kakashi’s hitai-ate up, just like that. Kakashi blinks, vaguely surprised that he lets him. Naruto’s fingers feather down the scar, brushing Kakashi’s eyelashes. “Did it hurt?”

Kakashi tries to speak past the constriction in his throat, the churning in his gut, the intimacy wounding. “Both the loss of my own eye, and the transfer of his did, yes.” He swallows, voice brittle. “But it was a gift, how could I refuse.” He sniffs, opening the sharingan, watching the red reflection of it in Naruto’s eye. He blinks, the words coming by themselves. “I was actually surprised it worked. The kekkei genkai of the Uchiha was a well-protected secret, or at least the details of it. Everyone knew that the Uchiha could awaken the sharingan… and only them. They had to be destroyed on death. But there had never been an instance of an Uchiha giving one to a non-clan member before…” He trails off, remembering the weird purple eyes of Nagato. At least not that we knew, then. He shrugs. “I accepted the gift, thinking all I could do with it was see.”

Naruto frowns, fingers still hovering over Kakashi’s cheek, the sensation of them there itching. “But you were able to use it.”

Kakashi shrugs, carefully not moving too much, trying not to break the weird spell they seem to be under. “Rin connected it to my nerves, my brain and…” He blinks, unable to really put it into words. “I knew.” He exhales, softly. “My Sensei pointed out that my chidori was incomplete before, because I couldn’t aim it properly, not fast enough. With the sharingan, that changed. And I…” I became a killer.

Naruto blinks, staring at his red eye. “You have since trained it, too. When I was away, I mean?”

Kakashi hums. “Yes, and I have used it already with you there. Wanna see it again?” Naruto nods, and Kakashi concentrates, following the weird pulling sensation to let the wheels turn.

Naruto gasps a small laugh. “That’s amazing.”

Kakashi grunts. “And draining.”

Naruto grins, his nose scrunching in a decidedly cute way. “Still.”

 

They are silent for a moment, as Naruto’s eyes glide over Kakashi’s visible face. Kakashi fights the blush. 

Naruto frowns. “The sharingan is a kekkei genkai, just like the byakugan, isn’t it?”

Kakashi blinks. “Supposedly they even stem from the same base form.”

Naruto tilts his head. “Really?” 

Kakashi tries to ignore how Naruto’s fingertips hover over the edge of his mask now. His expression is… weird, the flickering light of the lamp only adding to it. He clears his throat. “Yes.”

Naruto’s fingernail catches on the cloth and Kakashi withdraws, just a bit. His voice is husky, and he’s fighting the urge to get closer again, now. “Maybe you should ask Hinata.”

Naruto hums, blinking, hand dropping away and Kakashi hates himself for the slightly disappointed look that passes over his face, while at the same time knowing that this had been the only sensible action.

 

Naruto clears his throat, looking away again. “Hinata has changed a lot. There’s this confidence about her now that wasn’t there before.”

Kakashi clears his throat, too, glad for the change of subject, his heart still beating in his throat. “She has.” He remembers the almost ingenious way Hinata had protected herself from Guren’s crystal prison by coating herself with chakra. He swallows. “Life-changing events tend to do that.”

Naruto tilts his head. “You and Ero-Sennin and baa-chan were the reason for it when you went after her father.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “That is true.” He shoots Naruto a look. “But you know that… you saved his life by yelling at us, remember?”

Naruto snorts, rubbing a hand over his face. “I remember.” He sighs, face falling. “Hinata and Sakura spend a lot of time these days… I know Hinata was extremely heart-broken when Asuma died…” 

Kakashi frowns, following the thought. “Because Kurenai stopped coming by?”

Naruto nods, licking his lips. “First Sensei Kurenai had to give up leading the team, and now… “ 

Kakashi grimaces, with a sigh. And now she hides her pain, and herself. “I will go by tomorrow.” He shoots Naruto a look. “Maybe you want to come with?”

Naruto nods, but then shakes his head. “I’d love to, but we have this mission to this desert ruins that have emitted these energy readings the day after tomorrow.“

Kakashi blinks, something… tickling the back of his mind. “Desert ruins?”

Naruto nods. “Yes, supposedly there was a big town there, Loran, but it’s gone now, but there have been weird readings. Baa-chan said she’d send us with Sensei Yamato.”

 

Kakashi opens his mouth, the lamp flickers, and there is this pause in time, somehow.

His tattoo tickles, underneath.

 

And then knowledge crashes into Kakashi’s mind, and he gasps, clasping his head, and Naruto’s sudden, frantic voice is faraway, echoing like under water, and the hands on his hands try to shake him, and Naruto’s blue eyes are so dark and blue and so like his, and he remembers seeing them together, remembers the rasengans over their heads, remembers the smile on Minato’s face, remembers the grin on Naruto’s, remembers Naruto calling him cute, remembers the weird feeling in the pit of his stomach while watching that boy that had been a few years older, then, the boy that had made his heart beat rapidly, and that he had tried to ignore, because he didn’t know what that funny feeling was, remembers the wood user that had bonked him over the head and had said he’d waited so long to do that, remembers the pain in Minato’s face whenever Naruto had not been watching, had seen the tear that had dropped when he’d pulled out his hiraishin kunai to destroy the source.

Remembers Minato breaking down, for just a moment, when they’d been gone again.

Remembers rushing to Minato, not understanding, then, not understanding why Minato had not immediately locked their memories, too, after saying he would. 

Remembers Minato raising his hand to Kakashi’s face, cupping it, and asking if he wanted to become Anbu. With a shaking voice.

 

He simply had not understood, then.

Had not understood that Minato had known he would not live to see Naruto grow. Had known that Naruto knew Kakashi, and Yamato did, too. Had realized Naruto did not know him. Had known that half of the fox’s chakra had been sealed in his son. 

 

Kakashi had not understood, then, that Minato had… understood.

 

Maybe not everything… but enough.

And had wanted to keep him close.

Had wanted to prepare him.

 

Kakashi remembers, now, that Minato had taken him back to the village, silent, grave, sad.

Had seen him paste a smile on, hide his pain, when he had seen Kushina. 

 

Had seen him ignore her objections, for the first and only time, to take Kakashi to become Anbu, that very night. Before ever having been part of a team, even.

 

Had sat down, to do the tattoo.

 

When the needle had left his skin, Kakashi had forgotten the mission to Loran.

 

He remembers seeing the pain in those big blue eyes, after, always. 

He remembers seeing the emotion, and not knowing it. 

 

He remembers the happy, brittle smile, when Minato had told him he’d be a father, there, in the Hokage office, sitting behind the desk. 

 

The sun had illuminated him, had given him a halo.

He remembers feeling bursting with love for this blonde… 

 

And he knows now, that he’d loved the projection. 

He’d crushed on the forgotten memory of…

 

 

Kakashi gasps, eyes he doesn’t remember closing flying open, locking with Naruto frantic ones.

“Sensei!!”

Kakashi falls to the side, dragging Naruto with, falling to all fours, gasping.

Naruto’s hands are all over his body, trying to soothe, kneading his shoulders, trying to help his shivering limbs.

Kakashi holds out a shaking hand, catches one hand, squeezes it. He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “It’s alright, shhhh.”

Naruto stills, immediately, watching him, mutely now. 

Their shared, almost frantic breath is loud in the air. 

Kakashi shakes his head, and then pushes himself up, to sit on his haunches. Naruto’s fingers shift to clasp his hand properly, his other hand coming to cover them. “Sensei, what…”

Kakashi shakes his head again, and then laughs, while tears drop from his eyes, silently. He wipes at them, with his right hand. “I…” He smiles, broadly, with another pained laugh. “I just remembered something.” 

 

He inhales, shakingly, shooting a look at Naruto. 

Carefully aligns the memory with vision of the boy next to him. 

 

Matches it.

 

To the boy he’d crushed so hard on, no, fallen in love with, when he’d been almost 13. 

When they‘d been almost the same age. 

 

 

He knows that the bonded often recognize each other, long before the bond engages.

 

He knows now, that he had. 

 

He knows now, that Naruto will experience this, soon. Or has already, maybe. 

 

He laughs again, while another tear falls. “I just…” He falls silent again. And then sniffs, with a nod. “What happened?”

Naruto shrugs, eyes still wide on his. “You seized, and then trashed a bit, moaning. It only lasted for a few seconds, but…”

Kakashi nods, squeezing his hand. “I’m sorry for scaring you.” He sniffs, tone dry. “I’m quite sure that won’t happen again.”

Naruto blinks. “We should get you to the hospital, Sensei, I mean…”

Kakashi shakes his head, cutting him off. “Please trust me, Naruto, I know that this won’t happen again.” He smiles, a bit bitterly. “This was a… very special event.”

Naruto frowns, but nods, after a moment. “I… alright.” Something stubborn enters his features. “But I’ll stay with you.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, and then nods, pushing up. “Alright. But not here. I have…” He gasps a laugh. “Enough memories for now.” He looks down at their still clasped hands, and then withdraws his hand, carefully, gently, squeezing Naruto’s hands to make sure it isn’t perceived as rejection. “Let’s return.”

Naruto blinks, and then nods, bending to extinguish the lamp.

 

Kakashi exhales, and turns his back on the past.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The guards look at them funnily, eyes catching on Kakashi’s uncovered sharingan.

Kakashi ignores them, silently walking back to his apartment with Naruto, through the early morning streets, Konoha around them waking up with the scents and sounds of breakfast.

 

Naruto is a shadow, clinging to him, almost literally. 

Kakashi smiles softly, emotionally raw and ripped open. I scared you there… I’m sorry. We will both need to heal from this night.

He opens the apartment door, silently steps aside. 

Naruto toes his shoes off and hovers there, in the middle of the living room, shoulders low. 

Kakashi steps up to him, wanting to touch, badly, but knowing it wouldn’t be a good idea, not now, not now that he remembers, not now that he longs. Badly.

He swallows.

Naruto tilts his head back, to catch his red eye. “Can I sleep here?”

Kakashi raises his eyes to the sun outside the window, and then returns to the one in his life. Unable to deny the request. “Sure. Let me draw the blinds.”

Naruto blinks, and then lies down on the couch with a sigh, and Kakashi retrieves the blanket after drawing the blinds, tucks him in matter of factly. Naruto’s hand shoots up when he straightens, intending to leave. His voice comes haltingly, but firmly. “Will you… stay with me? Watch over me?” He swallows. “So I can watch over you?”

Kakashi blinks, trying to ignore how his skin tingles under Naruto’s touch. He clears his throat. “If that is what you want?”

Naruto hesitates, and then nods, tugging at his hand. “I do.”

Kakashi exhales, and then settles down on the floor in front of Naruto. Naruto hums, and turns onto his side, watching him, intently. His voice is soft. “You didn’t switch out books today.”

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head once. “Must’ve slipped my mind.”

Naruto hums and then scoots a bit closer, his breath tickling Kakashi’s neck. 

They are both silent, watching the shadows play and Naruto falls asleep like that, still clasping Kakashi’s hand. 

 

Kakashi stares at the hand holding his, his mind empty.

 

He doesn’t know when his head sinks down to rest next to their clasped hands, just that there is the smell of Naruto’s skin, and the deep sense of home. 

 

And memories, memories of a blond boy, smiling brilliantly at his father.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He goes and visits Kurenai the next day.

 

After having spent the rest of the day with Naruto, going for lunch first and then going by the Hyuuga complex with him, and training there with Hinata, Neji and Sakura.

 

After waving Naruto off, to have fun in Loran, his heart beating in his throat.

After nursing his bruises under the shower in the evening, the water salty once more.

 

Kurenai walks with him, for hours.

Listens.

 

To the things he can say, and those he can not.

He listens to her, as well.

 

Mirai kicks against his hand when Kurenai places it on her stomach, her laugh infectious. 

 

And Kakashi blinks away the tears, and the memory of Jiraiya’s voice. ‘The children are the future after all.’

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He had thought Naruto would behave differently after returning from the mission, but he actually does not. 

Kakashi frowns, while jumping through the trees, following Kiba and his pack. The recognition of the pull must have happened at a different time for him, then…or will happen still. I wonder why. And when.

He looks around at the ninjas with him, team Kurenai and Kakashi jumping grimly along the path, following information to find Sasuke and bring him home, finally. Kakashi clicks his tongue. Or, more precisely, track Sasuke down via Itachi. He looks up at Naruto, who is jumping before him. I wonder how you feel now. 

 

He opens his mouth to ask his pack for distance, when Naruto suddenly stumbles and halts, eyes wide. Kakashi stops, immediately, looking at him, with a frown. The others halt as well, hovering in the trees around them, vaguely irritated. 

Kakashi jumps over to Naruto, lightly places a hand onto his right shoulder. “Naruto? What is it?”

Naruto’s big eyes come up, slowly, tears in them. “I… don’t know.” He reaches up to touch his left shoulder, with a shake of his head. “I… something…” He frowns, looking away.

Kakashi swallows, a shiver passing down his spine. A premonition? “I… Can you continue?”

Naruto nods, immediately, swallowing. “Of course, Sensei.”

Kakashi steps back, and Naruto jumps, triggering the others to resume their journey as well, and Kakashi looks after him for a moment, sorrow twisting deep in his heart.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto sends out shadow clones, after finding the crater.

After an encounter with Itachi, just Naruto and Itachi, dammit, to which Naruto doesn’t say much.

 

Kakashi grimaces, watching the pinched expression on Naruto’s face. What did he say to you, hmm? What did he DO to you? He pinches the bridge of his nose, for just a moment, the headache pulsing. And why won’t you tell?

 

There is a gasp, and Kakashi lets the thought go, as Naruto’s eyes go wide. His voice is a whisper, his gaze burning. “Sasuke!”

Kakashi snarls, behind his mask.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The moment they encounter Tobi, Kakashi knows.

 

He cannot tell why, just that he does.

Despite the totally ridiculous persona that’s pushed forth.

 

It’s like a lead weight, dragging Kakashi down. Rooting him to the earth, tightly tethering his thought processes there, too. Makes his head empty.

He watches the futility of the rasengan of Naruto’s clone, his eye burning behind the hitai-ate.

The words are just as much an answer to Tenzou, as they are a realization. “He’s toying with us.” Why. What is he after? Or… who.

He grimaces, addressing the teams. Still. We have to try. “Alright everyone. Let’s get this over with.”

 

Battle formation B and A fail, and while it is unfortunate, it is not surprising. 

Not really.

 

Tenzou turns his head, eyes dark. “Well, Kakashi. What do you think of it.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, not answering. I think that Obito wants us not to reach Sasuke. I think that he might want Sasuke for himself. I think Obito does not want ME to recognize him. To… unmask him. Not yet. And neither… He frowns, following the realization. He doesn’t want to really hurt us, either. He’s just stopping us. But why doesn’t he attack us? 

He watches the way Obito fights, or better… evades. Tries to hear, but the word ‘kamui’ is conspicuously absent, but the pressure in his eye is not, increasing, for just a moment, whenever an attack passes through Obito. And burns, when he vanishes from within Shino’s bugs.

Kakashi grimaces, speaking mostly to himself, trying to make sense of it. “Did he use some kind of transportation jutsu right now? No, that’s not possible.” He would have needed to push through the dimension. Use the command kamui. Right? 

He frowns, dwelling on his own limitations. 

So he can pull himself into it? Is it… like the left and right part of something? I can do this, he can do that?

He works his jaw, speaking out loud, to pretend. “He didn’t evade the attacks, they were slipping right through him.” Something tickles the back of his brain, but he cannot grasp it, the thought too fleeting.

The orange mask shifts, to look at him, the eyehole dark. The mask turns again before he can properly look at the eye, but he already knows, he knows.

 

Kakashi blinks slowly, looking up at the dark haired man with the unruly hair.

They seem to be of the same height now, and obviously Obito has mastered his skills, if the ease with which he evades two full teams is anything to go by. 

Kakashi swallows, remembering the young boy and his broad smile, and then… the broken smile, insisting on the gift. And the screams, there in that cave.

Is that why you wear the mask now? To hide that what has been crushed? He shivers, remembering. How did you heal, how did you survive. Who helped you? He frowns, bile in his throat. Why did you attack Konoha. Obito, why. He swallows, grimacing behind his mask. Sasuke, I could understand. But you? And… He exhales a shuddering breath, allowing the thought. You killed Minato. And Kushina. Not directly, maybe. But… 

Kakashi swallows the anger and hate down, with an effort. He looks away, frowning. And yet… He looks back, watches Obito dance.

A brittle smile flits over his face, there and gone again. I should unmask you. I should. Here and now. He blinks, allowing the feelings to come, to rise, the affection he used to feel merging with the despair he’s felt all these years, and the self-hatred. 

The guilt.

 

The thought is bleak. My love for you screams darkness, just as Naruto’s love for Sasuke. Or my own, for him. Tethered in almost fanatic pursuit and obsession and rules, pressing down on us, and fateful events beyond our control. And, in my case, memories, elevated to belief. 

He sighs, wondering. Is that why I can use your sharingan? Because I feel as deeply as you do?

 

He closes his eyes, for a moment. 

Let’s resolution come, like a wave.

This has to end, here, now.

 

And then opens them again, lifting his chin, intending to call out to him, to unmask him after all, to stop him. Tenzou gasps, interrupting him, and Kakashi frowns, as the being called Zetsu rises from the branches, bringing news of Itachi’s defeat.

 

There is shocked silence, that only elevates the way Obito’s voice changes as he drops the persona. Turns to look at Kakashi, triumphantly.

Kakashi shivers. 

And then narrows his eyes and locks his left eye with Obito’s right, pretends to be surprised at the active sharingan burning down at him. Mocks, letting the wheels in his own turn, for effect. “What. A sharingan?” 

 

He can see Obito’s eye widen, and shifts, anticipating him to attack, but Obito vanishes instead, dramatically, making a farce out of it, evading, and Kakashi jumps into action, grimly calling back over his shoulder. “We have to get to Sasuke before they do.”

Naruto will be so furious if we lose him to the Akatsuki, now.

He blinks, the thought bleak. And he’ll be pissed at me. Not that he is directly responsible, but… If something happens and he ever finds out who Tobi is, and what my connection is, and that… I could have stopped him…. DAMMIT.

Kakashi pushes more chakra into his jumps, feeling the others follow.

The smile is dark, his heart beating in his throat.

 

Fine. Unmasking will have to wait. 

 

But I know you know now.

 

 

 

You will come to ME.

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 29: If you love something, let it go

Notes:

Changed the plot of the movie “Will of Fire” by placing it here, though it won’t have an effect on the story (or the connections to it) - just for the ones of you who know it :))

And: the movie "Road to Ninja“ (and that one connective episode) showed Obito testing his plan… and it was clear he wasn’t watching Naruto the first time either (or Kakashi, as we know from the flashbacks in manga/anime), so he had to know quite a few things. I’d like to point out that, while there’s a LOT of friction here… there’s also a lot of things to work through (later), so… nothing is easy :)) (now, was that ominous enough???^^^^^^)

ALSO: It has been brought to my attention that the "Lost Tower" references were obviously a bit too vague. If you haven't seen it, here's a mini video of the last scenes... with some of what I refer to here and later on, too. The movie was okay, imho, it could have been brilliant if they'd dared to go for the interpersonal emotional repercussions, but they didn't.
But hey, that's where we come into play, right? :)))

Feel free to ask if anything is unclear!! I'm HAPPY to talk about it :))

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

The scents are faint, the black flames around them burning still, eating away at the living world.

Kakashi grimaces, sharing a look with Kiba, who is exhausted, and frustrated.

 

There is blood, and traces of a fight, but no body.

No sign of Itachi, or Sasuke.

 

Kakashi looks at Tenzou, his voice quiet. “That… Tobi must have taken Itachi’s body, too.”

Tenzou nods, and Kakashi grimaces, looking over to Naruto, who is leaning against the slab of stone they found the small puddle of blood Kiba identified as Sasuke’s under, crying tears of anger and frustration.

His head is bowed, the voice hoarse. “Why can’t I ever reach him? Why can I never catch up to Sasuke?”

Kakashi swallows, harshly, averting his gaze. Ignores the way his gut twists. 

He looks back at Kiba, who shakes his head. Shiba lowers his head as well. 

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “There’s not even the faintest scent lingering here.” At least no scent we can follow. His hand twitches, wondering if he could follow Obito, if he really tried. But the jutsu he used… that is not what I do with the Mangekyo… that is something different still. He grimaces.

Naruto snarls, and then shouts, stomping away and over to the gap in the wall of Amaterasu flames, pupils elongated. “No way we give up after coming this far!”

And where do you want to go and look for him… they could be anywhere now. 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment. “We’ve done all we could.” He swallows, knowing deep down it’s a lie. I… I have not done all I could. I bet I could have stopped him simply by calling him by his name. He swallows, harshly, and clicks his tongue, looking over to Naruto, who stands next to a tree, with tears of rage on his face. “Now it’s time we went back to Konoha.”

 

Naruto averts his gaze, snarling. 

His fingernails are claws, scratching the bark. 

 

 

Kakashi closes eyes, and turns away.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Naruto stalks home after the others, shoulders locked, face pinched.

Tsunade looks after him, her gaze returning to Tenzou and Kakashi, both hovering in front of her desk still.

 

Her voice is low. “There’ve been developments.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, while Tenzou just shifts to his other foot.

Tsunade sighs. “Tensions in and with Sunagakure are rising. Apparently there are people in Sunagakure who are publicly doubting Gaara’a ability as Kazekage, now, that he’s lost his bijou.” She scoffs. “Never mind that he still has his sand ability, but of course losing his bijou makes him weak.” She groans, shaking her head. “Gaara is struggling right now. I hope there will be no… incentives from our side, but should there be…”

Tenzou nods, his tone flat. “He might be pressed to show strength instead of wisdom.”

Tsunade nods, rubbing her forehead. “Yes.” She shrugs. “That’s happened before. And we all know how fast these things can spiral out of control.”

Kakashi grimaces, shooting a look at Tenzou, before looking back at Tsunade. “What about Jiraiya? Naruto told me the other day that he had to leave mid-training. What about that? Any news?”

Tsunade looks away, twisting to look out the window. She shakes her head, and then shrugs, tone low. “No, not really. There was a lead, an opening the toad reported. He came by, told me that he might have information regarding… a certain Pain’s location… and then he left.” She tilts her head back, looks at Kakashi’s frowning face. “That tell you anything?”

Kakashi shakes his head, just slowly. “Not really, though…” He tilts his head. “Konan said, that ‘the rain would stop when pain was gone’… Maybe I misunderstood her and she meant that literally.”

Tsunade hums, crossing her arms. “Yeah, maybe.”

Kakashi shares a look with Tenzou. He clicks his tongue. “What is it, Godaime-sama.”

She blinks, sniffing once, before shaking her head. “Nothing.” She laughs, quickly, quieting again immediately. “Just a feeling.”

Kakashi grimaces, remembering Naruto’s feeling. 

And his own.

 

He wants to tell her it will be alright, but he doesn’t, knowing that that would be a lie.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Obito comes to him, in the dead of night.

 

As expected.

Hoped for.

 

Kakashi knows he should be frightened, or raise the alarm, but he also knows that both are futile. If Obito would have wanted to kill him, here, now, he would have attacked already. If he would allow himself to be captured, he would have been caught, a long time ago.

 

Where he thought would be a pit of churning emotions is only void, a careful, kept and embraced void. 

Hiding everything else.

 

Kakashi sighs, and turns onto his side on the bed, giving up the pretense of sleep.

He looks up at the orange mask, pushing some of Obito’s short black hair up, a bit wildly. Shadows cloak him, as much as the coat he wears.

 

Obito shifts on the window sill, one leg propped up, one dangling down, the foot carefully set right next to Mr. Ukki. He reaches out, gently traps one of the leaves between his gloved fingers, draws it through them. There is a weird kind of tranquility in the room, belying the tension that thrums in Kakashi’s stomach. 

Belying the eye that burns up at the mask.

 

Obito doesn’t fall back into the Tobi persona, his voice deep and sure, and Kakashi exhales, immensely grateful, listening to the timbre of Obito’s voice. “You’ve kept good care of his gift.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, just a bit. He tries to keep his tone inflectionless, while the pit in his stomach drops out a bit more. “You’ve kept track of our actions.” Of his?

Obito hums, the orange mask tilting to face him. There is a click of a tongue behind it. “I kept track of you.”

Kakashi pushes himself into a seating position, carefully. “Just me?”

Obito swings his leg, just a bit. “Maybe?”

Kakashi quirks his eyebrow, lets his eyes travel meaningfully over Obito’s cloak.

There is a sigh. “Alright, alright, not just you.”

Kakashi clenches his jaw. “What do you want with the bijous?” Since you obviously do not want the jinchurikis.

Obito chuckles, pressing a hand to his chest in a mock-hurt gesture. “Me?”

Kakashi grimaces, shaking his head once. Anger swirls in the pit of his stomach, and he tries to suppress it, tries to keep his emotions safely locked away. Tries to keep it from his voice. “Don’t play with me.”

Obito hums, the mask tilting again. “But I like to play.”

The muscles in Kakashi’s jaw jump, his voice pressed. “I’ve noticed.”

Obito chuckles again, caressing the leaf again, before swinging his other leg down to sit on the sill properly. He shrugs. “Playing is one of the few things you can still do when all alone…”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “You want me to believe you work alone?”

Obito tilts his head, tapping his finger on the sill, once. “Not anymore.”

Kakashi smirks, grimly. “That why you wanted Sasuke?”

Obito exhales, the mask tilting up. “Yes and no.” He chuckles. “These two… they’re like Yin and Yang, you know?” The mask lowers again, the eyehole dark, the sharingan obviously inactive. “Not like you and him.”

Kakashi freezes, and then forces himself to relax again, with an effort. His voice is cold. “Don’t go there.”

Obito giggles. “What. You don’t want me to dwell on the truly delicious fact that your bond engaged with our Sensei’s child?” 

Kakashi raises his chin, his sharingan burning. “And you don’t want to dwell on the fact that you killed him?”

It’s Obito’s turn to freeze, for a split second. When he answers, his voice is flat, but carries a caustic undertone. “I did not.”

Kakashi scoffs. “Oh please. You were the one who helped Itachi. You were the one who engaged Minato in combat at Naruto’s birth to draw him away from Kushina, you were the one who released the fox, you were the one…” He breaks off, breathing heavily.

 

For long seconds, there are no words, or other sounds, just breath, and emotions. 

Obito whispers, loud somehow. “So you know that part of the play.”

Kakashi cackles. “Play, huh. So much death and pain and tragedy… for your fucking amusement.”

Obito jerks, as if whipped. 

Kakashi narrows his eyes, with a frown. “What. Don’t like to be reminded of your part of it?”

The masks tilts, Obito’s voice cold again, and even. “And you, Kakashi, enjoyed wreaking havoc on the ones you were sent after?”

Kakashi blinks, his mind racing. He clicks his tongue. Enjoyed wreaking havoc… “So, who sent you?”

Obito scoffs, but looks away, and Kakashi smiles grimly, his heart beating in his throat. You were sent. That makes so much more sense. He swallows, pushing now, regardless, the words rushed. “Why did you help Itachi, hmm? Why did you help him kill the Uchiha, your clan?? Your family? Why did you allow Danzo to collect the sharingans?”

The mask tilts, and Kakashi frowns, something clicking. “Oh… or did he.” He chuckles, viciously. “Or did you collect the eyes, hmm? At least some of them? Collect them… for someone else?” He narrows his eyes. “Why do you need all these eyes, Obito… plan on giving them to the other Akatsuki members?”

Obito hisses. “Well, if you must know, Sasuke needed a pair.” He cackles, once. “For example.”

 

Kakashi blinks. “Sasuke? Why.” And you gave him a new pair? Why?

Obito hops off the sill, standing now in front of the window. Kakashi pushes up to stand, slowly.

The dark behind the mask is absolute, the gaze within impossible to catch. 

Obito’s voice is amused once more, collected. “Can you imagine, he threw Amaterasu at me.”

Kakashi hums. “Too bad he missed.” And the new eyes developed something like Itachi’s?

There is something like a chuckle. “It did serve as a good lesson for Itachi.”

Kakashi tilts his head. Itachi isn’t dead? And he’s… with them?

The mask tilts, but Obito stays silent, and Kakashi frowns, watching him. 

He wonders if he could actually reach Obito if he tried, the two feet they’re apart feeling like a mile-wide chasm. 

Obito sighs, and then shifts slightly, shrugging. “You knew I would come.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “I believed so, yes.”

The mask tilts again. “Still think you know me?”

Kakashi scoffs. “No.” He swallows, with a grimace. “I might know your part of the play, or some part, but that doesn’t mean I understand.” He huffs, shaking his head once. “I don’t understand at all.” He shifts closer, just a bit, his voice dropping. “How could you go after them.”

He knows Obito knows that he means Minato and Kushina and Naruto, and he waits, something in him screaming for an answer. An answer that would make sense. His voice drops to a whisper. “You wanted to become Hokage, Obito. And you…”

Obito hisses. “Shut up, Kakashi.” He chuckles, a mean lilt in his tone. “Bakakashi… ahhh, the name fits still.”

Kakashi glowers at him, silently.

Obito crosses his arms, and sighs, the mask tilting away, to the left. Kakashi narrows his eyes at the color of the flesh underneath, seeming too light in the low light. 

Obito exhales, but keeps his face averted, his tone low. “There were no ties that bound me after the cave severed them.” There is a click of a tongue. “The Obito you knew died that day.” The voice changes to a hiss. “Screaming.”

Bile rises, and Kakashi swallows it down, compulsively. He exhales, shudderingly, trying not to feel. “I remember. We both screamed that day.”

The mask tilts back, and now the red eye burns behind the mask, burns into Kakashi’s.

For another long moments, there’s nothing… nothing besides pain.

 

Kakashi inhales, shudderingly, trying to keep his voice firm. “It’s been a while since red eyes stared at me from this distance… has the doctor been able to help Itachi?”

Obito twitches, involuntary, the only outward sign that he’s heard. The reply takes a moment. “I wasn’t…” He pauses, and Kakashi can see the red light dim, meaning Obito is narrowing his eyes. There is a slightly peeved undertone to his voice. “It seems not even I know everything.”

Kakashi snorts, remembering Itachi saying something similar. He pushes, reaching a bit, but feeling that he is on the right track. He makes his voice deliberately sweet, knows it is grating. “Did Sasuke insist to be taken to a certain hideout? To put Itachi in? For healing, maybe? Or for hiding the supposed body?”

Obito glowers at him, silently, more felt, than seen.

Kakashi gives him a deliberate smirk.

 

And then Obito turns away, turns his back to Kakashi. 

Kakashi blinks, hand twitching, but he knows deep down it would be futile, this a deliberate action after all. 

A deliberate taunt. In return.

 

Back and forth… like tug of war. We’re still pushing at each other, trying to outdo the other.

 

Obito chuckles, shaking his head once. “You know, Sasuke aches for him… pines after him.” The head tilts back, emphasizing heavily. “In his fever dreams, he calls for him.” His voice becomes a sing-song voice. “If I didn’t know better…”

Kakashi grimaces, the anger now definitely coloring his voice. “Leave him out of this.”

Obito turns back, just lightly. With a mock-regretful sigh. “Ahhh, Bakakashi, but I can’t?” He spreads his arms, turning back fully. “Even now, your young soul-mate is asleep in his bed, with that abomination of a doll in his arms…” He chuckles. “He is a key element to my plans…”

Kakashi hisses. “Don’t you dare.” What plans.

There is a pout in Obito’s voice. “But he’s cute?”

Kakashi gnashes his teeth, glowering. 

Obito tilts the mask, obviously rolling his eyes. “Ah, you’re no fun.” He shrugs, with a little laugh. “Still… the way fate works is hilarious.” He clicks his tongue. “The stick-up-his-ass little prodigy ninja gets a soul-mate he has to wait for, for an eternity.” He chuckles. “I couldn’t have thought up a better punishment if I’d tried.”

Kakashi hisses, between clenched teeth. “What do you want with the bijous.”

Obito sighs, deeply, the red eye gliding over Kakashi’s face, like a touch. “Maybe I should take him with me tonight.”

Ice travels up and down Kakashi’s spine, lodging in his mind. He repeats, not recognizing his own voice. “Don’t you dare.”

The mask tilts. “And why not, Kakashi? Hmmm? Kaka-kun… I always hated it when Rin called you that, did you know? I was so jealous… I wonder if we’d be bound if she was alive…” 

Kakashi growls under his breath, his whole body taut. “Don’t change the subject.”

 

Obito steps back, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed. “You know… you know what would be a fitting punishment for you?”

Kakashi hisses in annoyance. “Why are you so set on punishing me?” I mean, I know… I guess, but then, on the other hand… “I thought you thought fate came up with the perfect punishment already?”

Obito weighs his head, ignoring his question. “Imagine if you would leave him, imagine if he would be forced to grow up without you, live on without you, to never fulfill the bond… and you would know, leaving, how much you’re going to hurt him.” He chuckles. “Well, at least until I need to collect him…”

Kakashi is silent, swallowing compulsively, feeling sick. He forces the words out. “Why would you do that.” He shakes his head, repeating. “Why are you so set on punishing me.”

Obito’s voice is a whisper. “You killed her.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, the feeling of flesh and bone and the beating heart, around his wrist. His voice is gravelly. “She killed herself, on my chidori.”

Obito hisses. “You should have taken out the ones around you first, instead trying to go at the ones trailing after her… they wanted to simply capture her after all.”

Ah. Kakashi reopens his eyes, feeling tired, so tired. “So you were indeed there.” He swallows, watching Obito lock his arms more tightly around himself. “You were there, with us.” He smiles, almost gently. You watched. “You awakened the Mangekyo that night. For both of us.”

Obito’s voice is gruff. “I think we both did.”

Kakashi hums, watching the sorrow and pain come off of Obito, in waves, almost visible. “And you killed all the remaining enemies, when I passed out from the pain and exhaustion.”

Obito sniffs, the mask tilting away. “I needed to hold her.”

Kakashi nods, once. There you are. A fraction of the boy I knew. There is your pain, your longing. “You could have killed me that night.” He blinks. “Or taken your eye back.” He frowns, following the train of thought. “But you didn’t… Why.”

Obito is silent, and Kakashi watches him, trying not to feel too much.

 

Eventually, Kakashi speaks again, gently, his voice low. “I think you longed for us still, didn’t you. For her… for me, for him. A part of you wanted to come home.”

But then you destroyed that home… and them.

Obito snorts, and then sniffs. “That longing has been safely sealed away.” He snorts again. “Though I hadn’t expected for my emotions to be this strong after, but…”

Kakashi frowns, latching onto the wording. “Sealed away?”

The mask tilts back. “None of your business.”

Kakashi nods, crossing his arms as well. “I see.”

Obito chuckles, but there’s pain in it. “No, you don’t.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, his tone imploring. “Make me understand then.” Tell me.

Obito tilts his head, voice dark. “Oh you’d love that, wouldn’t you. Make me tell you my plans, so you can foil them.” He unlocks his arms, steps forward one step, his voice a hiss. “But I won’t help you. I won’t help you save him.”

Kakashi works his jaw, pressing the words out. “So there is a way to save him.”

The red eye glowers at him. 

And then Obito turns away again, staring out the window. When he speaks, his voice is light again. “No. But… You could buy him time.”

Kakashi scoffs, his heart beating in his throat. “Buy him time?” Why do you offer time to me?

Obito shrugs, voice faraway. “Maybe he’ll be strong enough to resist us capturing him then… Or I could take him tonight.”

Kakashi snarls, his heart thundering now, feeling light-headed. “He’s not as easy to capture and kill as you seem to think.“ Even now.

Obito hums. “Everyone is easy to capture while dreaming.” 

Kakashi frowns, mentally stumbling over Obito’s nonuse of ‘sleeping’.

Obito shoots a look back, over his shoulder. “But I would enjoy seeing you suffer… seeing him suffer.” Kakashi swallows, not daring to say anything, and Obito chuckles, with a sigh. “So… why… don’t you buy him time, hmmm?” He leans forward the red ey burning into Kakashi’s. “Keep the peace.” He clicks his tongue. “And well, you know the saying… If you love something, let it go?”

 

Kakashi swallows, harshly, his voice a hiss. “You want me to let him go?”

Obito shrugs, with a chuckle. “I want you to know you’re going to make him suffer by leaving him…” The mask tilts back. “There’ll be an opportunity soon.”

Kakashi’s voice is caustic. “Really.”

Obito sighs, a happy little sigh. “Playing is fun.” And then his voice changes, to a hiss. “My… gift is going to be the price. And your knowledge.”

 

Kakashi’s heart beats, hard, once.

And Obito hisses and is gone, almost instantly, the void left behind chilly.

 

 

 

Kakashi blinks, and bends down as if in trance and calls Pakkun to check on Naruto, knowing he’s fine though, somehow, and then stares at the spot Obito was in, for hours, trying to make sense of it all. 

 

 

Some kind of sense.

 

Any kind of sense.

 

 

 

And his soul longs, more than he anticipated.

 

 

Damn.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi drags himself to the tower in the morning, intending to talk to Tsunade, only to find Naruto there already, almost yelling at her. 

“I need to go out! I need to find him!” Naruto pauses, swallowing compulsively, his hands twitching.

Tsunade glowers at him, and then shoots a look at Kakashi before she pinches the bridge of her nose. “Naruto, for the last time - we do not have a lead. We have no idea where he is. So we cannot start to look for him…”

Naruto pouts, crossing his arms. “I could send out kage bunshin and have them look for him?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. Depending on the amount of your clones… that would actually help.

Tsunade sighs, deeply. “I’m sorry, but you’re not going to. I need you to go onto a mission with team 7, and Kakashi. And have your chakra and wits about you.”

Kakashi shifts, tilting his head, while Naruto pouts. “Oh?”

Tsunade leans back, a grim expression on her face. “There have been reports of kekkei genkai users going missing from Kumogakure, Iwagakure, Kirigakure, and Sunagakure.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “But not from here?”

Tsunade pulls a face, shaking her head. “No.”

That’s… not good. Kakashi grimaces. “Tensions are rising?”

Tsunade nods. “Yes. I want you to track them. Try to find out what… or who could have possibly targeted them.”

Kakashi frowns, deeply, his mind empty. Kekkei genkais… Like your gift to me. Is that what you meant? An opportunity for me to… buy him time, soon? For your… gift to be the price? “I see.”

Naruto interjects. “And what of Sasuke.”

Kakashi looks at him, but Tsunade is faster, her voice hard. “If war was to break out our chances of finding him would become nonexistent. Try to remember that, brat.”

Naruto pulls a face, mouth pinched. 

Tsunade nods at the door. “Go. Tell the others. Kakashi will meet you at the gate.”

Naruto turns, and glowers at Kakashi, the blue eyes dark. The door is thrown into the lock.

 

 

Kakashi sighs, exhaling softly. “Is there really a chance for that?”

Tsunade grimaces. “There is a always a chance, you know that.” She scoffs. “Hell, I can remember three wars, can you imagine that? Three!” She shakes her head. “Our world is one of violence, and some people will do their best to make it burn.” She rubs at her temple for a moment, grimacing again. “This period of peace we’re in now… it’s been the longest so far.” She grunts, quirking an eyebrow. “If you count the chunin exams and the attack there out.” She sighs, with a small shrug. “Which is why I definitely want you to lead the investigation. Make sure that we keep the peace.”

Kakashi frowns, tilting his head. “Buuuuttt?”

Tsunade pulls a grim face. “They have requested that you lead the investigation also.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “Who are ‘they’?”

Tsunade smiles grimly. “Now that is the question, isn’t it.” She pauses, looking away. “The request came through the council. Which is more than weird, given the fact that I probably would have called on you anyway, as I said.” She looks back, her hazel eyes burning into his. “Is there anything you’re not telling me, Kakashi?”

He blinks, and then grimaces, going with a half truth. “I have no idea what’s going on.”

She pulls a face, looking away again. Her voice is dry. “You look like shit.”

He exhales, closing his eyes for a moment. “I slept like shit, too.” The few hours before he came.

She frowns, pushing. “What are you not telling me.”

 

He hesitates, and then shrugs, once, deciding to tell her after all. He lets a silencing seal snap into place, to her narrowing her eyes. The words are surprisingly hard to shape. “Obito came by.”

He has to give it to her, she stays very collected. Her voice is toneless though. “Obito.”

He nods.

She purses her mouth. “The Obito?”

He shrugs, and then nods again. “I believe so.”

She raises her eyebrows, dragging the word out. Watching him intently. “Whyyyy?”

Kakashi grimaces, hearing all the question she doesn’t ask. “I think he came originally to taunt me.” He hesitates, weighing his head. “He knows I recognized him when we encountered him.”

She nods, still watching his expression like a hawk. “The one in the mask. The one the others reported as Tobi.”

He nods, once. “Yes. I…” He shrugs. “I knew.” He clicks his tongue, chuckling, once. “And I taunted him, deliberately.” He swallows, looking out of the window for a moment. “I figured he’d come to me.” He blows out the air, shakes his head once. “And he did.”

Tsunade taps her finger on her desk, once. "And you couldn’t apprehend him?“

Kakashi sighs, and then shakes his head. "I knew given his skills that this would be a fruitless endeavor. So I chose information retrieval instead.“

Tsunade hums. Surprising Kakashi, when she asks the question that matters most. “Is he the enemy?”

Kakashi blinks, mentally regrouping, letting the discussion with Obito run through his head. The words taste like ash in his mouth. “He’s a puppet.”

Tsunade tilts her head. “Does he… know he’s a puppet?”

Kakashi laughs, once, a dry, painful, caustic sound. “I…” He shakes his head. “I don’t think so.” He draws breath between his teeth. “I mean, he…” He grimaces. “He said there was a seal on him, and that he had been sent. For another thing, years ago.” He frowns, unwilling to hash the past out once more, pressing on. “So he is aware to a certain extent. But I think he thinks he’s doing it all willingly.” He hesitates. “There’s conviction to his words, but…” He weighs his head. “Inconsistency to his actions…” He shrugs. “If that makes sense?” He would have never gone after Minato if he hadn’t been convinced by someone else. He would have never… He halts the thought, knowing he is leaning into wishful thinking. Still.

“Oh?” Tsunade frowns, staring into space for a long moment. “So who is drawing the strings.”

Kakashi shrugs. “I don’t know.” He scoffs. “I doubt it’s Danzo though. No matter his skill, he wouldn’t be able to defeat someone like Itachi… or the one with power over Obito.”

Tsunade purses her lips. She hesitates and then nods again, changing the subject. “So. His eye compliments yours?”

Kakashi chuckles, grimly. “Yes. The skill set seems to be inward, while mine is… outward. Not sure if that assessment holds true if we’d be in continued proximity to each other, but…”

Tsunade hums, and then prods. “What else.”

Kakashi exhales, and then lowers his voice, seal or no seal. “He said there’d be an opportunity for me to buy time for Naruto soon… with my… gift as the price.” And my knowledge that I would leave him alone. He swallows, deciding to skip that part.

Tsunade narrows her eyes. “The kekkei genkai you have from him would be the price for more time for Naruto?”

Kakashi nods, and then scoffs. “How utterly surprising, that kekkei genkai users have gone missing, isn’t it.”

Tsunade nods, with a quirk of an eyebrow. “Indeed.” She tilts her head. “You think it’s him?”

Kakashi frowns, and then shakes his head. “No. He might be behind it, but if he is, he only draws the strings. He isn’t really interested in taking my eye back, he…” He pauses, shaking his head again. “He could have taken it before. He doesn’t want it. I think it marks the breaking point for him. Taking it back….”

Tsunade nods, tapping her finger on the desk. “Taking it back would invalidate that breaking point.”

Kakashi hums, and nods, silently.

 

Tsunade sighs, and then looks away for a moment, changing the subject. “Naruto is frantic regarding Sasuke. He’s been kicking down my door almost every day now.” She shoots him a look. “If I didn’t know better…”

Kakashi laughs, a bit bitterly. “You know, Obito said the same thing.”

Tsunade narrows her eyes. “He’ll use that against us.”

Kakashi pulls a face. “Yes.” He already does.

Tsunade sighs, and then reaches up with both hands to rub her temples. Her tone carries some exhaustion, the weight of the words. “Are you still willing to take this mission?”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, his voice almost inaudible. “I am.” He clears his throat. “This isn’t something we can get away from.” And I cannot run away from him or his… plans. He swallows.

Tsunade sniffs, and then drops her hands, looking much older for a split second. “Alright, Hatake Kakashi. Go then. Take your team and find out what is happening.”

Kakashi inclines his head, and jumps.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto disobeys his order, to save Sai.

The subsequent turmoil leads to Kakashi crashing to the ground at one point, and he can feel the dent of the little box he keeps them in. 

 

He grimaces, though he doesn’t know if he’s annoyed or proud of Naruto. 

He pulls out the box, looking at the bent bells. 

And then gives them to Naruto, passing them on without calling it that. “Why don’t you fix them, hmm?”

 

Naruto takes the bells, and for a moment Minato stares at him, the blue eyes warning.

Kakashi averts his gaze.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Tsunade receives them, grimly taking their report, and then informing them that Gaara has been attacked. And that Sunagakure is arming their defenses. That she has been forced to do so as well.

 

Kakashi grimaces, and goes home with a headache.

And a bad, bad feeling.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Sleep is something Kakashi does not seem to do well anymore.

He turns to his other side, staring unseeingly at Mr. Ukki, expecting a black cloak and an orange mask to appear, with every beat of his heart.

But it doesn’t.

 

Kakashi turns back onto his other side, staring at the wall.

His mind keeps returning to that moment, so long ago, the memory of it so fresh now, so alive. 

So brutal.

The look of them, there, together, and the wide smile, and then the tears. The pull.

Kakashi exhales, shudderingly.

 

He hadn’t had the sharingan then, not yet. Minato had taken him along for experience due to his skills long even before he had put him into a genin team to learn some friggin’ teamwork.

Kakashi scoffs, shaking his head on the pillow. I really was a little shithead. He sniffs, wondering if the pull he’d experienced for Obito and Rin had been an echo of the pull he’d forgotten about, the need to stay connected. But no, I still feel this … connection to Obito, even now. It’s apart from the whole bond mess. He snorts, rolling onto his back with a sigh. The pull… I fell in love then, instantly, and didn’t know it. Forgot about it. And the absence of it was like a black hole, dragging at me… and then they… disappeared too, and the void only grew bigger and bigger and…

He undulates slightly, trying to find a more comfortable position, his head exhausted and wide awake at the same time. The thought comes with a severe bout of bitterness. Love has always screamed darkness for me. Why should it be better now? He snorts and then exhales, deeply, trying to relax his muscles. 

Exhaustion drags him deeper, eventually, finally, but not before a final thought comes, like a whisper. But he isn’t dark, is he? He’s the sun. Kakashi sighs, and consciousness frays, and he longs.

 

 

 

 

The dream is vivid, too vivid.

 

Kakashi trashes in his mind, trying to shake it off.

Hiruko grins, madly, gleefully activating the puppet curse. ‘I put it on you, so long ago. Do you remember? You were Anbu then, still… no, you don’t remember. I made sure of it. And now I will finally be as strong as they are… my old friends. I will be a Sannin, too.’

 

Kakashi snaps up, gasping, his eye burning. Reality seems dim somehow, the vibrant exuberance of the dream fading slowly. He draws a shaking hand down his face, feeling the skin on his back tingle, in the shape of a sign. Of course it would happen in a dream. Of course. He narrows his eyes, remembering Obito’s comment regarding dreams. So. The pieces are moving.

 

He smiles grimly, and then gets out of bed, the sky still dark.

 

His curse is loud in the little apartment.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Tsunade sighs, deeply, her face tired, when she steps around him, after having had a look at his back. “It’s a puppet curse alright, though it hasn’t taken over yet. Just activated. There seems to be a build-up.”

Kakashi grimaces, and closes his vest again, reaching up to rub his temple where the headache throbs. “I see.” He swallows, with a shake of his head. “You have to let me go then, for the sake of the village. Who knows what I’m… programmed to do once it engages.”

Tsunade pulls a face, while putting her face in her hands for a long moment. “You really think you would run amok?”

Kakashi scoffs, shrugging. “I have no idea? But imagine if I… aimed kamui at the village center from long distance? Unfocused?” He grimaces again. “I… If you cannot lift the curse I have to go and try to see it through. And find a way to break it with their help or use it against them.” 

Tsunade frowns, sinking back into her chair. “Against them? How?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “A puppet curse will direct my actions, right? Will lead me to where I should be, correct?” Tsunade nods, and Kakashi sighs, trying to explain his hunch. “If we are correct and my eye is what he… what they are after, then they won’t bother to kill me before, they want me to bring it to them. Which means, I will reach them. Him. Whoever. And if what that Hiruko said is true…” He tilts his head. “You should put a seal on me to activate my kamui the moment he tries to access it or absorb it or whatever.”

Tsunade smiles grimly. “That would destroy him then. Or whatever he uses on you.”

Kakashi nods. “With any luck, yes.”

Tsunade sighs, looking out of the window for a moment. “As good a plan as possible I suppose…” She snorts. “Though Naruto won’t like it.”

Kakashi exhales, in a rush. His voice is steady, though he is hurting, deeply. “I know.” He swallows. “We shouldn’t tell him.”

Tsunade tilts her head, quirks an eyebrow at him. “You think we can keep this from him?”

Kakashi shrugs. “We should try?”

She looks back at him, her gaze a weight, keeping him pinned. “You know what happens if you die, right?”

Kakashi scoffs, bitterly. “Yes.” He will hurt, yearn, when the bond engages, all his life, without even knowing why. He sniffs, looking away. “We have to hope he’s only after the eye.” Obito’s mask tilts in his mind, his words echoing. ‘and you would know, leaving, how much you’re going to hurt him.’  Kakashi swallows the rising bile down. “If we don’t try, then someone at the borders with a trigger finger will fire a shot, and that’ll be it.”

Tsunade snorts, derisively. “Indeed.” She shakes her head, and then hits her fist onto the table, with a curse. “Damn, Hiruko, you….” She grimaces, rubbing at the dent her fist left in the wood. She hisses the words. “He always tried to keep up, I know, and I know he always envied us our strength, but strength isn’t everything? You can still be friends and not be the strongest out there?” She groans, rolling her eyes. “The idiot.”

Kakashi swallows. “If that is why he is doing it…“ Longing is a powerful motivator. A powerful tool. He exhales, softly. 

Tsunade sniffs, pressing her lips together. “Fine. We’ll try it as you suggested.” Her gaze returns to Kakashi. “But you better find a way to return. I’m not going to stand here and explain to him how I could have sent his soul-mate on a suicide mission while knowing it was you.” She grunts, raising her eyebrows. “And he will find out, and not that far off either.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. “I know.” He smiles, a bit bitterly, giving her a fake eye-smile. “But you know the saying… If you love something, let it go?”

Tsunade glowers at him. “Trust me, it’s not what it’s made up to be.” Her gaze softens, as does her voice. “But you know that already.”

Kakashi nods and looks away, blinking away a sudden tear. “I know.” He clears his throat. “Still. Better than to hurt him. Or anyone else.”

Tsunade sighs, and then beckons for him. “Alright. Come here. Let me put the seal on you.”

Kakashi exhales, and then steps around the table.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The tug of the curse is a throb now, pushing him along.

Consciousness is a funny thing, fading in and out, with the changing of the landscape. And all that is there, still, is longing.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto’s voice is there, insistent, tugging at his mind. His heart. His consciousness.

“Sensei? Sensei? Come on, Sensei!” Kakashi tries to follow it, the instinctual desire to reach the source of the sound shivering through his limbs, dragging at the last remnants of energy. “Just wake up, Sensei Kakashi!”

Naruto’s voice is pleading now, suffused with desperation. “Please open your eyes! Wake up!” There’s a sniff, shivering through the fog in Kakashi’s mind. “I made a promise to Sakura, and I always keep my promises!” Kakashi wants to smile, but his muscles are still unresponsive, his face slack. Naruto continues, tone insistent now. “I told her that I’d protect you and bring you back home, safe.”

There are tears now in Naruto’s voice, tears that drag Kakashi’s consciousness back up, torturously. “Why does it always turn out like this?” There is the sensation of motion, and then a fist, hitting the pillar behind Kakashi, hard enough to break off the top. “Why??? DAMMIT!”

The word is a whisper now. “Why.”

It hurts.

 

Kakashi breathes the words, unable to muster enough strength to actually speak. “Good morning.”

The relief in Naruto’s voice is palpable, and hurting. “Sensei, you’re… alive.” The obviously joy slashes at Kakashi’s heart, relief settling in the cuts.

Kakashi opens his eye, just a bit, tone gruff. Trying to remember why he wanted Naruto to stay away. “What the hell are you doing here, Naruto…” Right. I didn’t want you to die here with me. I don’t want you to die. I want to secure the future for you. Why have you come after me. What… 

Naruto laughs at him, totally ignoring his gruff tone. “Whoa, you ever had me worried…” He turns away, rummaging around in his bag for a moment. “Just a sec…” He pulls the bells out, with joy on his face, so simple and pure that Kakashi can only stare, pained. “Here, look.” He jingles them, just a bit. “You said that you wanted me to fix them.” He grins, nose scrunching. “So. That’s just what I did!” 

Kakashi blinks, watching the blue eyes sparkle, the way Naruto’s face softens with the memory. “I never forgot the lesson of these bells.” Naruto shrugs, stating the for him obvious. “So I came after you.” He shakes his head. “I’ll never forget what you taught me, Sensei Kakashi.” His eyes harden, citing. “The ninjas who break the rules are nothing, but those who choose to turn they back on their friends are even worse than scum.”

Kakashi blinks, and Naruto’s eyes sparkle and… love crashes into him, with the weight of knowledge and memory and consciousness returning. Blinding. 

He sniffs. Right. And he’s repaired the damage to Minato’s… bells. The damage to his proverbial memory. The damage to the past. 

Kakashi breathes the word, letting his feeling spill into it. “Naruto.” He raises his head, looks unseeing at the ceiling, hearing Minato’s voice, for just a second. ‘I know the day will come when we’ll meet again.’ He breathes in, trying to gather strength. “Wait a second.” Why did I just think of Minato saying that? Is it because Naruto is here, and I somehow, deep down, knew he would come? He almost snorts, asking himself what he expected. “If I’m still here, and he’s here, the whole plan failed, didn’t it.” 

I guess.

And not just the mission… Obito’s demand, too. 

 

There’s laughter from their enemy, and Kakashi sighs, soundlessly, diverting his attention. 

 

Well then. Let’s come up with something else. 

 

 

 

He holds out his hand, for Naruto to pull him up. 

Naruto grins. 

 

 

 

A rasenshuriken manages, when everything else fails.

I guess he’ll have to be healed again. Kakashi smiles, softly. Tsunade will scold him. But enjoy it.

 

Kakashi returns his gaze to their fallen enemy, and stares down at Hiruko, who is dying, in his arms, yearning for his friends. 

For the Sannin. 

 

Kakashi can see it in his eyes, the terrible, profound longing. 

 

The words come by themselves, spoken out loud to someone who will not be able to pass them on. “Maybe it’s not you who lost… maybe it’s me. If I had gone and… sacrificed myself… I’d cut off my… “ He hesitates, resisting the urge to look for Naruto. “My friends.” But ultimately... “I was trying to sacrifice the most important thing in the village.”

The will of fire… our devotion. Our pride. 

 

Our grace. Our fate. 

 

Our will. 

 

Our strength.

 

Our love.

 

He looks away. “I forgot what matters.” I… yielded to you, Obito. Because I feared… that will not happen again. 

Hiruko takes his hand, just lightly. “Do you think I could have also had a bond?” The hand drops away, with a whisper. “My friend…”

 

Kakashi swallows, and lets him down, watching the now peaceful face for a moment. That is what drove you, there in the end. The longing… the terrible longing for connection, for more. He looks back at Naruto, who is being thrown up in the air by his friends right now, to their and his obvious fun.

He watches the glee on Naruto’s face for a moment, the thought without sting, simple truth. Even as young as you are - you far surpassed me, Naruto. In power… and wisdom.

 

Kakashi averts his gaze again, looking down into the peaceful face. You were used as well. It was easy to use your longing. He exhales, just knowing that Obito is being used through his longing as well. 

 

And then he pushes up, signaling Sai to conjure a bird to take the body back to Konohagakure, as proof. And maybe she wants to say goodbye, too.

 

 

 

Naruto comes up to him, after a while, holding out the bells for him. “Sensei Kakashi, look.” He lets them jingle again, and Kakashi turns to him, hands firmly in his pockets. Naruto smirks. “I always try to live up to what you taught us.”

For a moment, Kakashi sees Obito, telling him the most important rule. NEVER abandon your friends. He frowns. The will of fire has passed on, Obito. Or does it still live in you, too, despite everything? Deep down, in your soul?

He holds out his hand, glad when it is not shaking, and Naruto places the bells in it, with a soft grin. Kakashi folds his fingers, and closes his eyes, something within him fusing somehow, shattering and healing at the same time. 

He smiles, softly, ignoring the others arriving. “You know… you’re a lot like him.” You’re like his inverted image. Light to dark, but your soul…

 

Naruto blinks, and then pauses for a split second, eyes flitting away and back, and then he cringes, away from him. “What’s that?” He pulls a face. “Why are you grinning like that.” He grimaces. “You’re really weirding me out.”

Kakashi pauses, staring at him for a moment, and then looks at the sudden tension in Naruto’s shoulders. 

There is an exclamation behind them, from Hinata. The tone too indignant. “I’m shocked!”

And… for once, Kakashi cannot follow. “I… what???”

Hinata looks away, mumbling behind her hands. “I knew the two of you were always close, but still…”

Kakashi blinks, watching Naruto squirm and blush. What? 

Sai cites from his book. “It says here, after sharing a very intense situation, love can blossom.” He hesitates. “But it says nothing about men.”

Shikamaru interjects, laying on a rock above Sai. “Oh come on, you’ve got to be kidding.”

Kakashi stares, flabbergasted. “No! That isn’t what I meant….” For, like, ONCE that is really not what I meant, what the…

Lee speaks up, totally nonchalant. “Sensei Guy told me, that he’s simply a part of you.”

Tenten’s voice is dry. “I always suspected something like that was going on.”

 

Kakashi can only stare. What the …

The thought comes with the weight of the whole continent, taking his breath. They… know? He swallows. And they… don’t care??? He blinks. But why does Naruto…

Naruto turns to him, and Kakashi locks his eye with his, a bit deadpan, I mean, given what we’ve discussed already, and given what you know this is… 

And Naruto screams at them all with a roll of his eyes, hopping away. “Oh come on, give me a break here!!”

Kakashi reaches out, involuntarily. “No!” He grimaces, shooting the others a heated look and calling, for effect. “Naruto! It’s just a misunderstanding. Come back!” He jumps after him, totally ignoring that this must look exactly like what they’re insinuating. Like what it is.

“NO!”

Kakashi grimaces, ignoring how pleading his voice sounds. “Naruto, please.” Don’t make me chase you all the way back to Konoha.

“NOOOO!”

 

 

Kakashi gnashes his teeth. 

 

And catches Naruto, a mile down the road.

 

 

They crash into a tree, and Naruto stares at him, panting heavily, eyes a bit wildly, shivering. Kakashi turns his head, scans for chakra signatures. The others are all clustered, a ways off, and moving towards Konoha, and if Kakashi could bet, he would say it was Shikamaru’s doing.

He turns his head back, locking their gazes. His tone is gruff, trying to hide his bewilderment. And hurt. “What was that?”

Naruto does a little motion, like hopping up and down, with a grimace. “It wasn’t a misunderstanding?”

Kakashi blinks, his tone careful. “I see.”

Naruto hides his face behind his hands for a moment. “I just…” 

Kakashi exhales, and then relaxes, with an effort. “I understand.”

Naruto drops his hands, with a sniff. “You do?”

Kakashi nods, and then drops down to sit on the grassy ground. His voice is tired. “You fell back into the rejection pattern we discussed and used before because the others were there and you felt embarrassed.”

Naruto sniffs, and then glides down to sit down with his back against the tree trunk, feet propped up. “I’m sorry.”

Kakashi shakes his head, with a sigh. “Don’t be.”

Naruto sniffs again. His voice trembles. “They know??”

Kakashi huffs, tone carrying his exhaustion. “Apparently.” Shikamaru probably put two and two together from bits and pieces he heard from Asuma and Kurenai. Sakura is not blind and friends with Hinata. Sai is studying people very closely. Neji is in the jonin circles and probably hears lots and lots of rumors. And Tenten and Rock Lee have obviously seen me with Guy and drawn their own conclusions…

Naruto cackles, and he shakes his head. “It… threw me for a loop.”

Kakashi hums, nodding. “I can imagine.” God knows it has thrown me for a loop again and again, too. He sighs. “I don’t think they meant ill though.” On the contrary.

Naruto snorts. “Hinata said she was shocked.” 

It’s Kakashi’s turn to snort. “Right.” He remembers Kurenai’s words, spoken so long ago, that Hinata will have to look beyond what she expects. “And yet she wasn’t very surprised.”

Naruto closes his eyes, leans his head back against the tree. “None of them were.” He sniffs, his words coming haltingly. “I… It is always so easy when I’m alone with you, you know?” He opens his eyes again, shooting Kakashi a look. “And, I mean, I like to be, dattebayo.” He shakes his head, once. “But there’s always eyes watching. And rumors.” He scoffs. “I mean, there’s always been, in regards to me. But…” He trails off.

Kakashi nods, swallowing. He tries to keep the bitterness from his voice. “Now there’s even more, and relating to me.”

Naruto sniffs. “Yes.” He rubs at a spot of dirt on his pants. “And I panicked.”

Kakashi smiles softly. “As I said. That’s understandable.”

Naruto exhales, in a rush, watching him now, with an almost tranquil expression. His voice is low. “Who is ‘he’?” He hesitates. “Can you tell me?”

Kakashi ducks his head, with a soft chuckle. The thought is warm. It’s so you for thinking of me and my problems, even now. “Yeah, for once I can.” He hesitates, and then continues, voice soft. “He is one of my friends in my childhood I told you about. Obito. He is like your mirror image somehow. When you gave me the bells and smiled at me I…” He shrugs. 

Naruto nods, once. “Ah.” 

 

They are silent for a long moment, just watching the rocky plane they’re in. 

Naruto’s voice sounds faraway. “I wished we could stay here.”

Kakashi hums, and then decides to go for humor, shooting him a sideways look. “No Ichiraku’s here, though.”

Naruto pulls a face and nods, but lifts a finger. “We could ask him to set up a small store?”

Kakashi chuckles, warmly, watching Naruto blush, just softly. He clicks his tongue. “But the countryside here isn’t very pretty… I doubt people would come here in masses.”

Naruto grins and weighs his head. “It could be our secret. Our getaw...” He breaks off, blushing.

Kakashi blinks, and then looks away, giving Naruto space to collect himself. 

A bird cries in the sky, a crow, and Kakashi blinks, needing to ask suddenly. “What did you talk about with Itachi?”

Naruto snorts, shooting him a look. “I…” He shakes his head, once, fingers twitching. “Itachi wanted to know why I am so obsessed with his brother.” 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. Now that is a good question. He tries to keep his tone light. “So what did you say?”

Naruto shrugs, a bit listlessly. And then he smirks, shooting Kakashi a look. “I thought about telling him that Sasuke is the moon, but I figured he wouldn’t have understood, so I…“ He shrugs again. “I simply told him I am his friend.” Something stubborn enters Naruto’s features. “And that I’m going to bring him back.”

Kakashi nods, with a sigh. “Good.”

Naruto pulls a face. “I just wished we could have gotten to him before that Tobi did.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away. “Yeah.”

Naruto sighs, and then leans forward, elbows on his knees. “I guess we need to get back?”

Kakashi hums, giving him an eye-smile. “Well, you did manage to save me. Sooner or later we need to report in.”

Naruto’s face and voice darkens. “And endure their reactions.”

Kakashi grimaces, but then shrugs. “They’re your friends though, Naruto…” A thought occurs to him, and he shoots Naruto a look, tone careful. “Maybe… they said something here, now, to, like… tell you?”

Naruto blinks at him. “Tell me?”

Kakashi shrugs. “Yeah. Like…” He frowns, pushing on, suddenly knowing he’s on the right track. “I mean, the whole situation was weird, right? We’ve smiled at each other so often… and there’s been dozens and dozens of other situations. So why here, now?”

Naruto stares at him, frowning lightly. “You mean they… chose a situation, with us, faraway from Konoha, to tell us what they think of it?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “More like, what they thought of it, right?” He clicks his tongue. “The statements were like their initial reactions, somehow.”

Maybe they would have said more, but you ran and… 

Naruto’s eyes are wide on his, unseeing. “You mean, there won’t be any…” He blinks, obviously searching for the right word. “Scorn?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, internally cringing at the choice of words, needing to assuage. “I did see them throwing you into the air before, for saving me. Don’t tell me they hold any reservations in regards to you.” Or me.

Naruto blushes and ducks his head, with a small grin. “Right.” He frowns, and then chuckles. “The situtation was weird.” He grimaces. “And my reaction was dumb.”

Kakashi exhales, something in him relaxing. “But understandable.” He shrugs. “We’re all dumb as bread sometimes.”

Naruto snickers.

 

Kakashi pushes up with a grunt, and then holds out his hand, pulling Naruto up when he takes it. He smiles, carefully squeezing the hand before dropping it. “Let’s go home.”

 

And Naruto smiles at him, broadly, like the sun. “Yes, Sensei.”

 

 

 

Notes:

This part connected my story “Longing”, which I will build on later, too. It was an idea that didn’t leave me anymore. :). It’s not a “must” to read it, no worries, but it does build on the events there.

Chapter 30: Days of joy and lament

Notes:

I don’t know about you, but I always felt they kept that way open, just as with his clone later on… just this sliver of hope… so I’m using that^^.

And those of you who know Boruto will probably recognize where I‘m going with "this“ thing in regards to Lee - I -will- address it, later on, too.

 

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

Obito is there, laid back on his bed, when he gets back after debriefing.

 

Kakashi hesitates on the threshold to his bedroom, and then unclenches his jaw with an effort, and starts to undress, ignoring him. He takes his dirty clothes to the hamper, and then takes a shower, deliberately not checking back over his shoulder. 

When he is finished toweling off and tries to tame his hair while looking into the mirror, their sharingans catch, suddenly, and heavy, somehow. 

Obito stands leaning against the wall, behind him, clicking his tongue. “My my, you’re almost as scarred as I am…”

Kakashi grimaces, pulling at the knots in his hair with a sturdy brush. The heat in his voice is biting. “You should take off the mask, so we can start to compare properly.”

Obito chuckles, and then sighs. “Mhhh. No. I feel more comfortable with it on these days… Besides, people think I’m Madara, and I’d prefer to keep them in this belief.”

Kakashi frowns, shaking himself once, like a dog, and then grunting and giving up timing his hair further. “You pretend you’re Madara?” He scoffs. “From what I’ve heard I’d bet the real Madara would have killed himself before he’d cut off his hair.”

There is a moment, and then Obito snorts, shaking his head. But stays silent.

Kakashi narrows his eyes. Huh. Matches with something you know? He quirks an eyebrow. “I also heard that Madara never activated his sharingan outside battle.”

Obito chuckles, but there’s something dark in it. “Well, given the abilities, there were other times, too.” He hesitates and then adds. “I guess.”

“Mhhh hmmmm.” Seen him do it? Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Why are you here, Obito.”

 

Obito sighs, and then spreads his hands. “You failed. You’re still here!”

Kakashi reaches for his toothbrush, tone dry. “I’ve noticed.”

Obito’s hiss is heated. “Why. I told you you could buy him time? Why didn’t you?”

Kakashi tilts his head, shooting Obito a dark look. “It is not my fault if the piece you chose on the board was not able to fulfill its purpose.” He lifts the brush to his mouth, but hesitates, weighing his head. “Besides. I think you underestimate Naruto. By leagues.” He starts brushing, trying to keep his stance relaxed.

Obito’s sharingan burns for a long moment, and then the mask tilts, hiding its glow. “He’s just a boy.”

Kakashi finishes brushing his teeth, spitting the foam out. He quirks his eyebrows. “You were just a boy when you attacked Konoha.” He rinses his mouth, and then reaches for his towel, dabbing his mouth. “When you fought Minato.” He hesitates, remembering seeing the traces of the fight in the woods they’d found back then, after. The words taste like ash. “How did you manage to fight him back then… I saw the traces of the rasengan impacts. The kunais. We both know how fast he was.” He inhales, deeply. “How did you hold your ground against our Sensei.”

Obito crosses his arms, mask averted. His voice is hollow. “I masked my chakra and tried.” He chuckles. “Oh and he managed to hit me alright.” The mask tilts back, the red eye glowing at Kakashi through the mirror. “Not that it did him any good.”

Kakashi frowns, his gaze dropping down Obito’s body. “You managed to survive a rasengan aimed to kill?”

Obito cackles. “Well, he did manage to blow a big hole into me… but holes in my body cannot kill me anymore.”

Kakashi blinks, carefully schooling his expression. Really. “That’s nice.”

There’s pride in Obito’s voice now, mixed with something Kakashi cannot name. “I am not who I was.”

Kakashi surprises himself, the words honest, and coming from his soul. “I wish you were.”

 

There is a long pause, and eventually Kakashi leaves the bathroom, getting dressed again in the bedroom, foregoing his mask for once. For some reason he knows he has to be the one without the mask, today. He can see Obito still stand there from the corner of his eyes, but ignores it, going into the kitchen instead to boil some water, and get some cold water for Mr. Ukki. When he returns to the bedroom, Obito is sitting on his bed once more, seemingly frail and forlorn. 

Kakashi steps past him, uncaringly. 

 

Obito’s voice is light, almost tranquil, suffused with something very close to humor. “You’re not afraid of me.”

Kakashi shakes his head, carefully dusting Mr. Ukki’s leaves. “No. Why would I be?”

Obito laughs. “I killed so many…”

Kakashi sighs. “So did I.”

There is another pause, and Kakashi can feel the weight of Obito’s gaze, following his motions as he waters the plant. Kakashi steps back into the small kitchen, unsurprised when Obito appears on his couch as if through magic. 

Kakashi smirks, tone dry. “That’s a very nice trick you have there.”

Obito hums, crossing his legs. “It’s handy.”

Kakashi weighs his head, preparing some instant onigiris. “That it is.” He tilts his head, shooting Obito a look. “I’d offer you some, but if you don’t take off the mask…”

Obito hums, his gloved fingers tapping, once. “It’s fine. I don’t have appetites anymore.”

Kakashi turns to him, stares at him for a moment. “Not even the sweets you loved so much?”

Obito scoffs. “I’m not a child anymore, bakakashi.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Mhhh hmmm.”

 

He turns away again, and looks at the wall, tone careful. “You wanted to force me to let him go.” He tilts his head back at Obito. “Why.”

Obito’s tone is dark. “I told you.”

Kakashi shakes his head, slowly. “No. That is not the reason.”

Obito is silent, the mask tilted away. When he finally speaks again, his tone is grating. “You don’t deserve to have the bond, when I…” He breaks off.

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. He clears his throat, tries to keep his tone light. “You really believe your bond was with Rin?”

The mask swivels round to him, the voice behind it heated. “You don’t??”

Kakashi shrugs, with a sigh. “I’m not sure. I just…” He chuckles, with a shake of his head. “Once upon a time I thought it was with one of you, too, you know… I never felt close to anybody else.” He shrugs again. “So when fate decided otherwise…” Of course, if I had actually remembered Loran… He frowns, letting the thought go. 

Obito’s voice echoes his bewilderment. “You think my soul-mate could still be out there?”

Kakashi shrugs, shooting him a look. “I don’t know?? Have you looked?”

The mask tilts away again, and Kakashi would bet anything, anything, that the expression behind it is sullen now. He quirks an eyebrow, removing the packaging from his onigiris, and then carries them over to where Obito is sitting, settling in his armchair. 

He hesitates, and then leans forward, just a bit. “No matter what you will throw at us now, Obito… I won’t let him go, and he won’t let me go, I truly believe that. And he will find a way, he always does.” He hesitates, catching the gaze of the now dark eye behind the mask. “I know you know that I am the only one to stop you…”

The mask tilts, ripping the gaze away. 

Kakashi smiles sharply, letting his teeth flash. “I know that a part of you wants this to happen.” He gentles his voice, and his expression. “It’s why you’re here.”

Obito scoffs, and then gets up, stepping away from him, arms crossed. 

Kakashi reaches for an onigiri, munching on it without really tasting it. Waiting.

Obito’s voice is caustic. “If I kill you now it would weaken him considerably.”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Or strengthen him. You don’t know which way it would be, which is why you tried to make me leave, tried to make me reject him for his supposed own good.” He swallows, allowing a chuckle. “But it didn’t work out that way.”

Obito’s voice is toneless. “I hate you.”

 

And Kakashi sighs, reaching for another onigiri. “No, you don’t.” 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Tsunade rubs her temples, tone almost amused. “He came back, again?”

Kakashi shrugs. 

Tsunade sighs, shaking her head. “That is so weird?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “I have a feeling that someone”, he hesitates, emphasizing the word heavily, “sealed away his more tender emotions in regards to certain people, but left pain and anger intact… But pain always pulls on longing, too, and so the seal has been weakened over time.” He frowns. "Where would a seal like that need to be placed?“

Tsunade grimaces. "The heart I guess? It’s a very… specific one.“

Kakashi nods, and then sighs. "Makes sense.“ And unable to be removed… except of course one cannot die anymore by mere physical injury.

Tsunade hums, weighing her head. “If you’re right, he’s fighting himself.”

Kakashi pulls a face, tone low. “He always did.” He sighs. “Ultimately I firmly believe that Obito just wants the pain gone…” He frowns, something tickling the back of his brain, there and gone again, and he continues, with a small shrug. “But he was led onto a path that doesn’t allow him return anymore.”

Tsunade nods, and then sighs, looking up at him. “So, what now?”

Kakashi sighs. “Now we wait?”

Tsunade tilts her head. “For?”

 

Kakashi exhales, slowly. “For the last test.” The Akatsuki… going after Naruto. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto hammers on his door, a few days later. “Sensei!!!”

 

Kakashi hurries to open the door, staring at Naruto’s flushed and frantic face. “What happened?”

Naruto is panting, eyes glowing. “Sensei, Shikamaru sent me, Kurenai told him to get you, they’re on their way now, and she wan…”

He doesn’t hear more, jumping out of the building and towards the hospital, while pulling on his shoes mid-jump. 

Naruto catches up to him, giggling. “Oh, this is so exciting.”

Kakashi grunts, his stomach fluttering. “And she really asked for me?”

Naruto grins at him. “Yes. She said this was nothing she wants Shikamaru for.” He snorts. “Shika was a bit peeved.”

Kakashi snorts, sharing a look with him, but it does nothing to assuage his own nervosity. “Thank you for getting me.”

Naruto grins. “Absolutely, Sensei.” He hesitates, and then shrugs, hopping over onto the hospital roof. “I’ll go onto a mission in a short while, with Sensei Yamato. We’ve been sent to protect someone called Utakata and Hotaru…”

Kakashi nods, and then steps forward to give him a quick hug. “Take care, Naruto.”

Naruto grins at him, and then points to the stairs leading down. “You, too, Sensei.”

 

Kakashi nods again and is off, flying down the stairs. The nurse points him towards the maternity ward, and he skids to a halt in front of the room Shikamaru stands, leaning against the wall. 

Shikamaru’s voice is dry. “There you are.” He grins, a bit darkly. “She specifically asked for you.”

Kakashi shoots him a look. “Honestly, don’t take that personally, Shikamaru. This is not a situation like any other.”

Shikamaru sighs, and then nods, crossing his arms. “I know.” He shrugs. “Still.”

Kakashi reaches up to squeeze his shoulder. “I know.”

Shikamaru nods and then steps away, and Kakashi enters, trying to calm his racing heart. 

 

Kurenai sees him, immediately, reaching for him with her left hand, propped up on the bed. “Kakashi!” 

The midwife and the doctor look up, but ignore him, telling Kurenai to breathe instead. 

Kakashi steps up, and takes the proffered hand, wincing when Kurenai almost breaks it when a contraction hits. 

The doctor’s voice is dry. “She’s a fast one.”

Kurenai is panting. “No shit.”

The midwife pushes Kakashi a bit up to Kurenai’s head and out of the way. “Stay up there, and support her. This is a bit of a precipitate delivery, so it won’t take long.” She sees his vaguely panicked gaze and waves off. “No worries, this is nothing bad, it happens.” She pats his arm. “Just squeeze back.”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, a bit wildly. “Okay.”

And then he gasps, as Kurenai squeezes his hand again, with the strength of an iron tong. He tries to squeeze back, sees the force with which Kurenai pushes. 

She gasps, her red eyes finding his, the pupils huge and dilated, remote somehow. 

He bends forward, pushing a lock of hair out of her forehead. “It’s alright.” He smirks softly. “He’s here now, too, you know it.”

She smiles a trembling smile and then the midwife says ‘push’ and it’s the last thing Kakashi really hears for a while, his world reduced to giving her strength, squeezing her hand and breathing with her. 

 

And crying tears of joy, when Mirai wails.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He wanders through the hospital after, limbs floating.

Finds Shikamaru out front, on that bench, a cigarette between his fingers. 

 

Kakashi sniffs, and sits down next to him, and takes it from him, pulling his mask down to take one drag, before giving it back, to Shikamaru’s bewildered and definitely amused look.

Kakashi shrugs, while letting the mask snap back into place. “Long story.” 

Shikamaru sniffs, and then smiles, shooting him a look. “Everything alright?”

Kakashi hums, flexing his fingers. “My hand is bruised.” 

Shikamaru cackles. 

Kakashi sighs, reaching up with his left arm to pull Shikamaru into a half embrace. He keeps his tone soft. “They’re both alright. The doctor said that it sometimes happens this fast. Mirai is healthy and cute and…” He trails off, sniffing. 

Shikamaru nods, reaching up to wipe at his eyes. “I’m glad.”

Kakashi tilts his head towards the entrance. “You can go in now.”

Shikamaru shoots him a look. “She wants to see me now?”

Kakashi nods. “Yes.” He hesitates, and then adds, gently. “You do know that it wasn’t rejection, before, right?”

Shikamaru ducks his head, and then sighs. “I know.” 

Kakashi tilts his head, lowering his voice, tone very dry. “Trust me, for some things it’s good to ignore them for a while longer.”

Shikamaru grimaces, with a bit of a cringe. “Right.”

Kakashi squeezes his shoulder and then releases him, with a nod of his head. “Now go. Get acquainted.” He catches Shikamaru’s quick gaze, grinning. “I am quite sure Asuma asked you to watch over her, didn’t he.”

Shikamaru blushes a bit and then grins, getting up. “Guess we both will do that.”

Kakashi nods, relaxing on the bench. “We will.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kurenai is released from the hospital only two days later, rolling her eyes at him and Shikamaru with a sidelong gaze at Shizune, who laughs gently, while shooing them out of the house to let Kurenai and Mirai rest. 

 

The ceremony to officially name Kakashi the godfather is matter-of-fact and yet intimate and beautiful, and Shikamaru holds Mirai, his dark eyes on Kakashi.

Kakashi places his gift for her on the table, sees Kurenai’s gaze soften and tear up, but she smiles, and nods, and he pulls her into an embrace, silently holding her. 

Her voice quivers. “Thank you for getting the blades for her.”

He sighs into her hair. “They belong to her.”

She sniffs. “Think she’ll be wind, too?”

He chuckles. “I’d bet anything on it.” He draws back a bit, grinning at her. “You know, when the time comes, I have the perfect person to teach her.”

She laughs, gently, and then nods, with a grin. “Oh, he’d love that.”

He grins, and then pulls her back into his embrace. “He so would.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Iruka opens the door, after the fourth knock, rubbing his eyes. “Kakashi… what…”

Kakashi exhales, and then smiles up to him. “Wanna go for a drink?”

Iruka blinks. “Now?”

Kakashi shrugs. “It’s only 9:30pm, I figured you’d still be up?”

Iruka blinks and then tries to hide his yawn, to Kakashi’s unending amusement. Iruka shoots him a skunk eye. “Oh, alright.” 

He turns and pulls on his shoes, and Kakashi watches him, allowing himself to feel the deep, deep affection he still has for Iruka. And that I will always have, likely. He sighs softly. 

Iruka quirks an eyebrow, while pulling his door shut. “What.”

Kakashi shrugs, starting down the street. “I just realized I will always love you.”

Iruka shoots him a look, and then bumps into him, gently, on purpose. “Dito.”

Kakashi chuckles. “Is that truly a word?”

Iruka chimes in, shrugging. “I don’t know.” He clicks his tongue. “But everybody knows what it means, so…”

Kakashi hums, nodding. 

Iruka turns towards a small bar in a side street, and Kakashi follows, settling down next to him at the corner of the bar, the music in the background too loud, but just loud enough to provide privacy. Iruka signals for drinks, and they wait for a moment, silently thanking the waiter when they are served.

Iruka takes a sip of his cocktail, quirking an eyebrow. “So?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Can I not go for a drink with you without anything else?”

Iruka grins. “You could.” He takes another sip. “But why are we here tonight?”

Kakashi sighs, with a grunt. “Seeing right through me, as usual.” Iruka snickers. Kakashi sends him a sideways look and then shrugs, minutely. “I was named godfather today. And a lot has happened with Naruto.” He hesitates, and then decides to omit Obito. “And the seal released.”

Iruka stares. “The Sandaime’s seal released?”

Kakashi grimaces, and then shakes his head. “No, the other one.” He quirks an eyebrow. “You know, the one Minato placed under my tattoo?”

Iruka raises his eyebrows, lips shaping into a silent ‘oh’. He tilts his head. “And?”

Kakashi sighs, deeply. “Aaaaand I remembered.”

Iruka blinks, taking another sip, and pushing Kakashi’s drink closer as well, prompting him to take a sip. “So?”

Kakashi lowers his voice, knowing Iruka must strain to hear it, but unable to make himself speak louder. “And I remembered going onto a mission with Minato, way back then, before I became Anbu, and there was a time insurgence, and I met Naruto…”

Iruka blinks at him, slowly, but catching on immediately. “And you fell in love.”

Kakashi snorts. “I recognized the bond, yes. Given my age I had no idea what that feeling was, so I ignored it, rejected it even, but it was there, and Minato…” 

Iruka finishes the sentence, nodding to himself. “Minato recognized it as well.”

Kakashi blinks, wiping away sudden tears. “I think so, yes. He was so sad. I… the lock took away my knowledge of why he always carried this sadness in his eyes as well, I didn’t understand, and now…” He sniffs, his voice trembling. “He knew he would not see Naruto grow. He knew.” 

Iruka’s voice is a whisper. “Damn.”

Kakashi clears his throat. “I… I guess he started to think about ways how to do certain things right then. I mean, he knew Naruto would carry half the fox’s chakra, and he knew I would be in the Anbu, and he…” He sighs, staring unseeing into space. “He knew.” He cackles suddenly, viciously. “It was probably why he was so blunt in regards to all the shit going down as well, he already knew he wouldn’t make it so he went in on full power regardless.” He scoffs. “And everything snapped into place.”

Iruka is silent for a long moment, staring into his glass. Eventually he takes a big sip, clearing his throat. “I’m sorry.”

Kakashi nods, mutely. 

Iruka sighs, and watches him take a sip. “So, what was that about Naruto?”

Kakashi snorts. “Oh, Naruto thought that because his tattoo is black, and mine has a gradient, that it cannot be me, so he thought it was Sasuke. Until Sakura told him that Sasuke wouldn’t have left him then.” Iruka grimaces, silently, and Kakashi nods, continuing. “Of course I couldn’t actually tell him, and I know it hurt him… But… He then later came to the conclusion that he likes to be near me nonetheless, and he was back to his slightly-pushy self, only to have all his friends tell him they know on our last mission.”

Iruka’s mouth drops open, his voice carrying something of a squeak. “What??”

Kakashi nods, finishing his drink. “Oh yes. And he panicked. But, I mean, it does have something good, because they seem to have told him like, their initial reaction? And now, they just treat him as before. Still.” He shakes his head. “That was a scene I could have done without.”

Iruka pulls a face. “I can imagine.” He signals for another round. “And?”

Kakashi grimaces. “Aaaand… “ Obito tried to force me to let him go. He clears his throat. “And the recent tensions with Sunagakure have driven home how fragile this peace is…”

Iruka nods, watching him closely. “That is not all there is to it though.”

Kakashi grimaces again, shooting him a withering look. “I… my connection to him is used as a weapon.”

Iruka blinks, frowning. “You won’t tell me details?” He nods at the bartender, and Kakashi waits until he’s gone again.

His voice is low. “No.” He clears his throat. “But it’s worse than Ibiki’s little schemes.”

Iruka pulls a face. “Ugh, I’m sorry.” He inhales, deeply, and then exhales, in a rush. “Still. You cannot run from this.”

Kakashi sighs. “I know.”

Iruka shakes his head, very slowly. “No, I don’t think you do, not fully.” He leans forward, eyes burning somehow, tone low. “You. Cannot. Run. From. This.” Kakashi averts his gaze, and Iruka reaches up, to tilt his face back by a finger under his chin. “You never could, Kaka-kun.” He quirks his eyebrows. “That is why we’re here, now, as friends, and not as lovers.”

He lets Kakashi’s chin go, and Kakashi swallows, harshly.

 

There is a long pause, as both mentally regroup.

Kakashi takes another sip, and then clears his throat, changing the subject. “So. I heard an interesting rumor?”

Iruka leans back a bit, with a sigh. “Oh yeah?”

Kakashi tilts his head. “You and Anko?”

Iruka blushes, wildly. He stammers. “Well, I…” He breaks off, and then clears his throat, continuing, bravely. “She’s thinking about becoming a teacher. I… We met a few times.”

Kakashi hums, watching Iruka’s face heat up. “Mhhhh hmmmm.” He grins. “So, is it something serious?”

Iruka shifts on his seat, still beet-red. “I… the tattoo is still red. I think she’s just looking for closeness. Comfort.”

Kakashi hums. “Closeness is good?”

Iruka shoots him a look. “Yeah, well, I mean, it’s…” 

He trails off, and Kakashi reaches up to squeeze his shoulder. “No need to explain to me.” He scoffs and then chuckles. “Really.”

Iruka snorts and then nods, with a grin. “Right.”

Kakashi grins at him, feeling surprisingly warm. He reaches up, and pushes a wisp of hair from Iruka’s forehead. “You deserve all the love, Iru-kun.”

Iruka stares at him, and then ducks his head, with a sniff. “Thank you.” He swallows. “So do you.”

Kakashi raises his glass, waits until Iruka clinks it with his. His voice is suffused with affection. “To new adventures.”

Iruka snorts and then grins. “To us!”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Later, much later, after having put a dead-on-his-feet Iruka into his bed, Kakashi jumps up onto Iruka‘s roof, and settles with his back against the cool tiles. 

 

He stares at the Hokage heads, unseeing, trying to imagine Obito‘s face there. Tries to imagine how he must look, now. 

Obito… you suffer so much, too. You…

 

He closes his eyes. 

And his heart aches.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi happens to be there, a few weeks later, when she enters Konoha.

 

Usually, he’s not one to stare… but by the time he can tear his gaze away, she has disappeared round a corner down the street and towards the tower.

He draws a hand down his face, the feelings jumbled. And then jumps after her towards the tower, simply unable to help himself.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Tsunade’s eyes twinkle at him when he appears in front of her desk. “Kakashi, so nice of you to come by.”

He hums, shoving his hands into the pockets of his pants. “Mind if I stay?”

Tsunade leans back, a definite grin now on her face. “Nope.”

Kakashi nods, and then clears his throat. “You knew she would come?”

Tsunade shrugs, just lightly. “She is a diplomatic guest. Of course.” She smirks. “I also sent for Naruto, who has been back as you probably know.”

Kakashi nods, and then tries to relax, answering her unspoken question, with a sigh. “Yeah, I know. I’m… trying not to haunt his steps too much.” He swallows. “He needs his friends.”

Tsunade hums. “That he does.” She opens her mouth to say something else, but there’s a knock on the door, and Kakashi’s stomach twists, and Naruto pushes his head in, with a grin. “Baa-chan, you wanted to see me?”

Tsunade glowers at him, but waves him in, waiting until he steps in fully, shooting a look at Kakashi. Her voice is deliberately firm. “Naruto. Your presence has been requested by the visitor we’re about to receive.”

Naruto steps forward, with a sidelong glance at Kakashi, his eyebrows rising. “A visitor? For me?”

Tsunade nods. “From the Land of Demons, yes.”

Naruto blinks, and then grins, broadly. “Shion!”

Kakashi tries to breathe. 

Tsunade sends him a definitely amused look. “Yes. The priestess wants to talk to you.” She clicks her tongue. “She’ll be here in a moment.”

 

As if on cue there’s a knock on the door, and Shizune opens it, her dark eyes twinkling when she sees Kakashi. “Godaime. The high priestess Shion would like to speak with you.”

Tsunade nods, and then sits up, greeting Shion warmly. “Shion-sama. What a pleasure to have you in Konoha.”

Shion inclines her head, stepping forward slowly, her white robes whispering along the floor. “Godaime-sama, thank you for receiving me.” She tilts her head, looking at Naruto, her cheeks coloring. “Naruto-san… I am so happy to see you.”

She smiles, her whole face lighting up, totally ignoring Kakashi.

Tsunade clears her throat, obviously more than amused if the twinkle in her eyes is anything to go by. “What has brought you here, Shion-sama?”

The priestess turns back to her, the blush deepening, though her voice is surprisingly firm. “I have come to request another honor to be bestowed upon us, and extended from us, for Konoha. I have come to request for Naruto to visit with us once more.”

There is a pause, as everyone chews on the implications. 

Tsunade licks her lips. “Was the last… honor unsuccessful?”

Shion shrugs, just lightly. “It was. Which is not surprising, as it often takes several years for the women in my position to receive. But even if it had been successful my choice would have led me here once more.”

Kakashi shifts to his other foot, his nails pressing into his palm. He tries not to think.

Tsunade shoots him a look. “I see.” She clears her throat, and addresses Naruto, who has been weirdly silent through it all. “So, Naruto. Do you accept that honor?”

Naruto opens his mouth, and then closes it again, slowly. He shrugs… and then shakes his head, slowly. “I…” He shoots Shion a look. “Can we go somewhere, where we are alone?”

She blushes, and then nods, her lilac eyes sparkling. “Of course.” She extends her hand. “Lead the way. My entourage will stay at the guest houses, so we can have some privacy.”

Naruto blinks, and then tilts his head towards Kakashi, but doesn’t really look, taking her hand instead. He smirks, gently. “Alright.” He takes her hand, and starts towards the door. “See you later, baa-chan.” There is the slightest pause. “Sensei.”

 

Kakashi stares after them, the click of the lock loud somehow. 

Tsunade clears her throat. “Well, that was something different for once.”

Kakashi grimaces. 

Tsunade tilts her head, shoots him a look. “He didn’t seem too happy about the proposal? I mean, I don’t think they’re off to…”

Kakashi shrugs.

She narrows her eyes. “Are you just going to stand there, glowering?”

Kakashi shrugs again, spreading his arms.

 

Tsunade glowers at him in turn, and then snorts, nodding at the window. “Get lost, Kakashi.” She clicks her tongue. “And don’t shadow them.” Her tone gentles. “He will come to you, I’m sure.”

He nods, silently, glumly, and then allows a single thought. 

 

I hope.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

It’s Guy who finds him, a few hours later. 

 

Kakashi shoots him a look, over the edge of Icha Icha Tactics, when Guy settles on the next branch over. 

Guy sighs, raising his eyes to the sky. “Ah, the fires of youth that burn so brightly. To have them discover their desires is so beautiful to see.”

Kakashi grunts, turning a page. So Naruto has accepted? He settles on a vague: “And annoying.” To put it mildly. He grimaces. Which is quite hypocritical of me. Still.

Guy shoots him a look, fist raised, tears flowing down his cheeks. “Never have I seen this passion before, this vigor. The sheer power of it will fuel his life for the months to come.”

Kakashi swallows, trying hard not to be an ass about it. His voice is toneless. “I guess.”

Guy sniffs. “And to think it was your beautiful soul-mate’s idea.”

Kakashi pauses, eyes unseeing on the book, and then exhales, deliberately, softly. “His… idea?”

Guy nods, in a decidedly exuberant way. “Oh yes. And of course Lee accepted, the fires of his youth calling and accepting the challenge.”

Kakashi blinks, trying to follow and trying very hard not to jump to conclusions, his feelings jumbled. “What… challenge.”

Guy presses both fists against his chest, his eyes full of soul. “Naruto has asked for Lee to succeed where he failed. Of course Lee has accepted the challenge, with glee.”

Kakashi blinks, stunned into silence. “I…” He cannot help himself, his tone echoes the utter astonishment he feels. “And she accepted that?” He blushes, backpedaling a bit. “I mean, she seemed pretty… errr… settled? On her choice I mean?” 

Guy smiles, broadly. “Lee bowed his head and won her heart.” He sniffs. “I am so proud of my boy.”

Kakashi stares at him. Huh. He blinks. “Just like that?”

Guy sniffs again. “Naruto told her of all the physical skills Lee has, and it changed her opinion.”

Kakashi shakes his head, slowly, once. Did he now. “It did.”

Guy shoots him a look, blinking. “Do you doubt the fires of youth burning in Lee?”

Kakashi hastily waves off, trying to deflect. “No, of course not, I…” He exhales, and then sighs, shrugging. “I just didn’t see that happening… before?” He swallows, remembering Lee’s stare that evening, finishing lamely. “I mean, from her side, I guess.”

Guy grins, broadly. “The priestess was fully convinced when he went and showered her with rose petals.”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, once. “Huh. I… see.” 

Guy nods. “Yes, Naruto told her that he had no interest in romance, and Lee jumped in.”

Kakashi stares at him, trying to imagine. He told her he had no interest in a romance with her? He clicks his tongue. “Given the diplomatic status of the request I guess that’s good then…”

Guy nods again, and sniffs. “Indeed. I’m so proud of Lee.”

Kakashi nods, and then sighs, with a soft chuckle. “Well, that is something I didn’t foresee happening.” At all.

Guy reaches over, squeezes his shoulder. “You and me both, Kakashi, you and me both.”

Kakashi snorts, something in him relaxing.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Naruto is sitting on his door sill once more, dozing.

Kakashi drops down in front of him, watching those blue eyes opening to his. He opens the door, quietly, watches as Naruto gets up and enters, rather matter of factly. 

Kakashi puts his shoes next to his, stares at them for a moment too long.

 

Naruto turns to him, in the middle of his living room. He hesitates, and then holds something up. “Look, Sensei, what I found today. Doesn’t it look like Pakkun?”

Kakashi blinks, and then raises his hand to touch the keychain, the dog head attached to Naruto’s key looking suspiciously like Pakkun, indeed.

He snorts. “Oh yes.” He snickers. “Don’t show him.”

Naruto giggles. “He’d be so pissed.”

Kakashi grins, watching that mobile face glow. “Indeed.” He hesitates, trying to come up with a way to breach that subject, gently, but Naruto beats him to it.

His voice is calm, collected, and serene somehow. “I declined Shion’s offer.”

Kakashi nods, and shoves his hands into his pockets, lest he reach out and hug Naruto. He swallows, tries to keep his voice light. “I heard.”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow. “Sensei Guy found you?”

Kakashi snorts, nodding again. “Mhh hhmmm.” He tilts his head, willing the blush he feels down. “You accepted last time and you seemed happy enough… what made you change your mind?” 

Naruto pulls a bit of a face, carefully putting his keychain away. He shrugs. “I realized that…” He hesitates, and then raises his eyes to Kakashi’s bravely. “I… she would keep a girl, you know? And I realized that if I ever wanted kids… I wanted to be a part of their lives, no matter the gender, you know? I mean, I haven’t met my parents, and I…” He trails off. 

Oh Naruto. Kakashi cannot help himself, he steps forward, pulling his hands out of his pockets to envelop Naruto in a bear hug. Naruto sniffs, and hugs him back, burrowing his nose into the gap of Kakashi’s armor and neck. 

His voice is muffled. “Besides. I couldn’t live with them, this is my home, and I couldn’t be away from y…” He breaks off. 

Kakashi tightens his arms, sighing into the spun gold beneath his nose. 

Naruto sniffs, continuing, words low, breath puffing at Kakashi’s skin through the mask. “But I do want kids, Sensei. At least two.”

Kakashi swallows, glad that Naruto cannot see his expression right now. He presses the words out. “I’m sure you’ll find the suitable partner.”

Naruto’s head under his chin shifts. And then he sighs, the arms around Kakashi’s lower back tightening. His voice comes haltingly. “What if… what if I don’t want to go the traditional way though?” 

Kakashi’s heart skips a beat, and he’s sure Naruto must be able to hear how it hammers now, suddenly, vicious. Do you mean… He tries to stay collected, his breath too fast. We could… “There are other ways.”

Naruto hums. “I wonder how Sasuke’s kids would look like.”

And… a bout of self-hatred he hasn’t felt for quite a while slams into him, with sarcasm. See, that’s what you get for getting your hopes up. He clears his throat, the words tasting like ash. “Well, depends a bit on the mother then, too, doesn’t it.”

Naruto giggles, obviously not sensing his turmoil. “Yes.” He inhales, and then steps back, to look up at Kakashi. “Thank you for always being here for me, Sensei.”

 

And Kakashi fakes an eye-smile, muscles aching with the way it feels fake beyond hope. “Sure.”

 

 

 

There’s movement outside the window, and Kakashi collects himself, with an effort, nodding at the Anbu. He tilts his head, frowning. “The Godaime has summoned us.”

Naruto blinks, shooting a look out the window. “But we were there just earlier?”

Kakashi nods, grimly. Yes. Something must have happened. He pulls on his shoes, waits until Naruto is done as well, and then jumps over to the tower, his stomach fluttering when he sees both Gamabunta and Gamakichi sit in front of it.

 

 

Oh no.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kakashi stares at Fukasaku, trying to make sense of the words. 

 

Naruto yells at him, and Fukasaku, and Tsunade.

And then runs, from them all.

 

Kakashi draws blood, from his palms.

 

 

The silence is deafening, when Sakura leaves, as well.

 

Fukasaku speaks up, eventually. “He chose to write this message instead of getting away, sacrificing himself. I had to gather a bit of strength before I could slip through their net to reach you.”

Tsunade sniffs, her mouth set, expression grim. “I see.” 

Fukasaku blinks at her. “Still, he chose to slip into the water. With the toad regeneration and drawing on nature energy…”

Tsunade interjects, tone angry. “Are you meaning to tell me he survived this?”

Kakashi tries not to breathe. 

Fukasaku fidgets. “I… not as a human.”

Tsunade inhales a shuddering breath. “There was a toad, in the pond the other day, it behaved strangely.”

Fukasaku blinks. “Maybe… Jiraiya-boy found a way.”

Kakashi blinks. As a toad? He presses the words out. “What does that mean?”

Tsunade pulls a face, shooting Fukasaku a heated look. “It means I will go and try to find his… body when this shit-show is all over.” She sniffs, wiping angrily at her eyes. “Ahhh, Naruto is right, I shouldn’t have let him go alone.”

Kakashi swallows, the taste of bile in his mouth, not daring to think.

Fukasaku sighs. “Not one of you would have been able to defeat them.”

Tsunade’s voice is a hiss. “I’m a Sannin, too.”

Fukasaku tilts his head, voice apologetic but firm. “I do know, Tsunade-girl.” He chuckles, and then sighs. “But Jiraiya-boy was only able to hold his ground against them with nature energy. No other jutsu sufficed.” He blinks, grinning suddenly. “You do know what that means?”

Tsunade pulls a face, shooting a grim look towards Kakashi, who tries not to react, at all. She nods, once. “Yes. I will send Naruto to you, as soon as we have deciphered the message.”

Fukasaku hums. “Very good.” He chuckles. “My wife will be happy to see the boy again.”

Kakashi sniffs, looking away, trying not to lash out, feeling white-hot anger at the joy in Fukasaku’s tone. 

Fukasaku shoots him a look, obviously sensing his anger. “You are always welcome with us as well, Kakashi-boy… Jiraiya-boy always spoke highly of you.”

Kakashi opens his mouth, rushing to accept, but Tsunade is faster.

Her voice is firm, apologetic, but hard as steel. “I’m sorry. That won’t be possible.”

Kakashi stares at her, furious, knowing his gaze is bordering on insolent. 

Tsunade quirks a fleeting smile. “I cannot let him go with Naruto. We know Pain is coming here. At some point. If they’re here before Naruto returns…”

Kakashi sniffs, and then speaks, tone dripping with hate. “I’ll make them pay.”

Tsunade inhales, deeply, her tone too gentle. “If you can.”

Kakashi looks away, the muscles in his jaw jumping.

Fukasaku clears his throat. “Tsunade-girl. If you would take a photo now, please… I need to Mount Myōboku return to heal.”

Tsunade nods, and then clears her throat, signaling for Shizune. “Sure.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He knows he should follow Naruto, but he is simply unable to.

Instead, he stares at the backs of the Icha Icha books on his book shelf, stares until the names lose all sense of meaning.

 

Starts, when Iruka is there, in his living room, staring down at him.

 

Kakashi blinks, clears his throat, and shoots a look to the open door, tone gruff. “Yes?”

Iruka narrows his eyes, and then lowers into a crouch in front of him. One hand comes up to clasp his knee. His tone is soft, gentle, hard as steel. “I just met Naruto on the street, he declined my offer for ramen. And now you totally ignored my knocking. What happened.”

It’s not a question, and Kakashi grimaces.

His voice feels like being pushed through fire, his tongue unresponsive. “Jiraiya’s dead.” I guess. Or the Jiraiya I knew at least.

There is a pause, and then Iruka pushes up and close, hugging him tightly. The words are whispered into Kakashi’s hair. “I’m so sorry.”

Kakashi sobs, once, and then nods, wildly. Hugging back for just a moment. His voice shivers. “It’s alright, it can happen, right, it’s a risk we all take, daily, and…” He trails off, and averts his eyes, the gaze of Iruka’s big brown eyes too painful. 

Iruka’s smile is soft, a tear running down his cheek. “You’ve known him longer than me, and I know he’s always been there for you, too. It’s alright to mourn.”

Kakashi’s face crumbles, abject pain twisting his features for a long moment. 

The words drip from his mouth, like black tar. “All I do in this life is mourn.”

Iruka closes his eyes for a long moment, and then pushes up, and presses a kiss to Kakashi’s temple. “Not all you do.”

Kakashi shivers.

Iruka gently strokes the skin over Kakashi’s mask, under his eye, and then whispers, gently. “You should go and share your pain with Naruto.”

Kakashi shakes his head, instantly, wildly. “I can’t.”

Iruka sighs softly. “Why.”

Kakashi snorts, the sound painful. His voice grates. “If I open myself to him, in this too, with my pain…” He blinks, swallowing compulsively, his voice dropping to a whisper. “There would be no barrier left I can use.”

Iruka closes his eyes for a long moment, and then nods, once, and presses another kiss to Kakashi’s temple. He sighs softly. “I understand.” He pushes up, and then caresses Kakashi’s cheek once more, before stepping back. “I will go and try to comfort him. Will you be alright, Kaka-kun.”

Kakashi chuckles, drily. “Ain’t I always.”

Iruka narrows his eyes. “I’m serious.”

Kakashi sniffs, and looks away, and then nods, once. His voice is hollow. “Please be there for him.” He swallows. “Please.”

Iruka bends down and gives him another kiss to his forehead and then leaves, and Kakashi stares into space, the skin where Iruka touched him the only thing that seems alive.

His gaze drops to the drawer at the bottom at the shelf, knowing that it still contains that wrapping paper he took then, years ago, when Jiraiya had gifted Naruto the first Kakashi plush doll. 

For a moment, he can hear Jiraiya laugh, ferociously. 

He blinks, eyes traveling up to the books once more.

 

And then the world wavers, as the first tear drops.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He watches Iruka and Naruto hug, from afar, for a moment.

 

And then jumps over and down in the small garden of the Hokage mansion, sitting down next to Tsunade, on the porch.

 

She smirks, softly, painfully, but doesn’t say anything to greet him, her eyes faraway. 

 

Kakashi’s voice is gruff. “Anything I can do to help.”

 

She inhales, deeply, and then shrugs, her voice low. "For all these years he was a rock in my foundation, you know… someone to lean on. Loud. Obnoxious. Irritating. Powerful. Reliable.“ She swallows. "Mine to call for help.“ She shoots him a look, and he smirks, painfully, knowing she knows. She echoes his smile and then sighs, quietly. "I always thought he‘d be there.“ She sniffs, and tilts her head. "When he left I cried, you know…“ She looks back at him. "There was this feeling…“

He nods, and then presses the words out. "I know, I had it, too.“

She sniffs again, her throat clicking. "And now…“

She trails off and he closes his eyes, for a long moment, his voice carrying the pain. "All that is left is regret.“

She looks away, and then nods, once, her voice so light he almost doesn’t hear it. "I should have told him.“

And Kakashi laughs, once, and then draws her into an embrace, propriety be damned, and echoes her feelings, spilling from his tongue. "Oh, he knew.“

 

 

He knew. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

That Pakkun key chain was shown in the anime, in the episode after the Land of Waves… while it is cute as HELL (imho), it somehow didn’t fit then, so I just put it in here.

Aaaand: A friend of mine had a birth like that. 45 minutes total. Those 45 minutes weren’t fun, but it does happen.

Chapter 31: A need to die, today

Notes:

I think ‘The amazing devil’ used that phrase with the kindness first in one of their songs? At least I hadn’t heard it before, I think, but I thought that yes, THAT is what Naruto does.
Also: since we’re deep in the fate & destiny territory, “the talk” is going to be just a tiny bit different :)

> Jiraiya’s Icha Icha Tactics excerpts were based on some excerpts here … :))) I adapted them a bit, but if you want to cry tears of laughter, I can recommend. (Btw - if anyone knows of a translation of the original page in the manga…. I’d love to read it^^)

 

And: I’m … going to play a bit with the different expectations regarding “adult” vs “underage”… obviously it differs in cultures, and obviously it might be different in regards to various things, too. In “Naruto”, it is supposedly 17 (canonically), so within this context that is something that Naruto obviously is looking forward to… however, in RL Japan the age is currently 18, down from 20 just a few years back (if I googled that correctly). In most countries I’ve been to, the age of majority is in the area of 18-21, with some of the rules changing even from 18 to 21.
(There’s a nice meta post here, too, in regards to the age of child soldiers in Naruto)

 

Becoming adult you think you almost -are- … even if it takes a while longer yet to actually become an adult, after reaching the “legal” age. Kakashi, being this big chunk older, obviously has his own thoughts on the matter.

Tl;dr: I meant it when I said I’m not going to put them together underage… but the characters might mean/expect/want different things here… so that had to be taken into account as well 😜

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

 

 

The next days pass in a blur, with Naruto suspiciously absent.

There is a void in the air, sucking all oxygen from it, and making it extremely hard to breathe.

 

His dreams are filled with death and pain and longing.

 

Kakashi cannot make himself go and see Naruto, though he slinks by the apartment a few times nonetheless, the need to be close battling with the need to stay apart. But he never runs into him, since Naruto seems to have holed himself up in there anyways, too, and Kakashi really cannot blame him.

 

He’s stared at the photo of the code Jiraiya left for hours, but the characters had not held meaning for him. Though, granted, Kakashi has had a hard time concentrating on their meaning, his thoughts threaded through and fuzzed out by memories of his time in the big Sannin’s company.

 

And he really doubts that Shikamaru needs to know what Jiraiya estimated Tsunade’s chest circumference to be.

 

A funny memory, that one. 

In a way.

Kakashi remembers standing there, in Konoha, and Jiraiya had stared, grimly, his whole face lighting up when he had seen Tsunade, and Kakashi had been unable to not ask… and had regretted it, immediately, embarrassed as hell. But now… now it comes with humor. And the memory of having to look up, Jiraiya towering over him. 

Kakashi snorts, directing his feet to the tower. And isn’t it funny how even idiotic little tidbits of life seem so precious in retrospect? How we try so hard to seem respectable, and serious, but what sticks is the moments of irreverence, the instances of glee.

The moments of joy.

 

The acts of insolence.

 

Like your books, that don’t care for society’s rules.

 

He takes the way past the intelligence and decryption headquarters on a whim, slowing when he hears Naruto’s indignant tone drift over. 

He jumps close, and watches him uncover the first clue, from afar.

Suddenly, the bag he carries feels heavy.

He pulls the book out with shaking fingers, and then clears his throat, leaning nonchalantly on the sill of the open window. “I think it’s this one.”

Naruto’s eyes snap to his, wide and haunted. “Sensei Kakashi.”

Kakashi swallows, makes his voice light with an effort. “It’s been on my mind, so I decided to pop in when I heard your voices. I think I caught most of it.” He blinks, and then shifts, watching the scientist put the pieces together, and Shikamaru grin, just a bit. 

And Naruto, who keeps staring at him, with this grim expression and the forlorn eyes. And then the small smile, that spreads, when Shikamaru points out that Jiraiya did indeed leave the key to him.

Kakashi closes his eyes, for just a moment. Thank you, Jiraiya.

 

He almost misses them addressing him. 

The moment he reruns the words in his head feels like an eternity, with a bottomless pit of embarrassment at the end. “Eh?”

Shikamaru tilts his head, opening his mouth, but Naruto is faster.

His voice is loud, and belligerent, deliberately, and his eyes flash. “What’s the problem? Just hurry up and read it, will ya?” 

Kakashi blinks.

And Naruto grins at him, for just a second, a grin that almost reaches his eyes.

Kakashi groans. The little shit head.

He has half the mind to just tell Naruto to read it, since he was the one who proofread it, and he is the one Jiraiya left the key for, but… that’s not true, is it. While it’s true that Jiraiya left the handwriting hint to Naruto, who had read his handwritten manuscripts… he knew that I am the only one running around with a copy of this book the whole time. This was aimed at both of us. 

He shoots a last, pained look up at Naruto, who has now crossed his arms, and glowers at him, for effect, while the whiskers quiver in abject amusement. Oh oh. You know what’s coming, don’t you. Kakashi stares down at the book, glumly. I bet he picked some of the worst parts, didn’t he. 

 

Just for shits and giggles.

 

 

 

He inhales, deeply, and tries. “Page 31. Right. So, the first sentence reads... ‘The added stimulant of his tongue writhing against her flesh spiraled a jolt of pleasure straight to her clit.’”

Silence, as the words sink in. Finally the scientist takes her pen, and writes it down, shaking her head. 

Kakashi rolls his shoulders, tries to stay relaxed. “Page 8. ’Real fluttery feelings in her thighs migrated up through her, until everything tingled and sang and she thought she might actually explode.’”

Shikamaru reaches up, rubbing the bridge of his nose.

Kakashi swallows. “Page 106. ‘One man I met zeroed in on my boobs like a baby wanting milk.’”

Naruto taps his foot, still glowering at him, while Shikamaru grimaces.

Kakashi winces. “Page 7. ‘’Isn’t his cock pressed against my sex?’ 

Silence, for a few seconds, the turning of the page very loud.

Kakashi clears his throat, his face heating up. “Page 207. ‘Among the heat coalescing in his middle, spiraling inward in an ever contracting knot, the hoarsely muttered words shoved him past his breaking point, and everything flew apart.’”

The scientist tilts her head, and she blinks, shooting him a quick look. Kakashi wants to sink into the ground, now. 

Instead, he turns to the last page, with shivering fingers. “Page 15. ‘Them… they never held much appeal for me, though I tasted them of course, but you… you have brought me to my knees, literally - and you do know I… love you.’”.

 

Kakashi falls silent, knowing he is beet red, and trying not to think too much, especially not dwelling on that last one, which was part of a scene Kakashi knows was also a reference to their first time. And the shower. As was the one in chapter 11, or page 207, thank you very much. I might have known he would pick the quotes to tease me. 

He swallows, willing all the blood away from his face again. Futilely. 

 

 

The scientist stares at the paper, and then lifts her head. “So it says… The real one is not among them?”

Kakashi blinks. The real enemy wasn’t who he fought? The real… Pain? Nagato? So who did he fight? Who is them?

Naruto pulls a face. "What the hell does that mean.“

Kakashi shoots him a look. He sighs, his thoughts glum. It means they will come soon. It means we have to teach you senjutsu, like NOW. And that means that… we have to send you to them now, to train sage mode with them. Because he’s not here anymore to teach you. "It means you‘ll have to go train soon.“  Again. You’re leaving me, again. He swallows. 

Naruto blinks, the blue eyes that had sparkled with a bit more life during this interlude dimming again. "I see.“

Kakashi steps back from the window, catches Shikamaru‘s gaze. "Let’s go to the Godaime.“

 

There is something stuck in his throat, making it hard to breathe.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

It feels unreal.

 

And there is no white-haired Sannin protecting him now, guarding him.

No ferocious laughter, forcing levity.

 

No jovial and kind understanding, and affection, in dark eyes.

 

 

He watches Naruto leave, with Fukasaku and on a toad again, his hands clenched in his pockets once more, shivering and holding on by sheer will and he cannot shake the sinking premonition, this pitch black feeling, this rising terror, that this is it, somehow. 

The feeling in his gut is surprisingly clear, surprisingly specific, coming with a devastating and simple thought. I won‘t see him again, right. Not in this life. 

 

I just know it. 

 

I…

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, and turns to the side as the toad jumps up, and he stumbles over to the open gate door and bends down to the grass… and throws up. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He goes and trains his eye, for hours. 

At training ground 11, far out.

 

Where nobody sees when he passes out.

 

 

 

But he does manage to aim properly, at the pin of a needle, finally.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Anko is there, on day four.

She lazily throws a kunai at a tree, and then pulls it back with a snake from her wrist.

 

He narrows his eyes, watches the snake disappear into her skin again. He tries to keep his voice neutral. “So are your scales the same as his?”

Anko hesitates, and then grimaces, her voice dark. “Similar. Not the same.” 

Kakashi hums, and pushes himself up from the spot he’d rested under a tree to walk over to her, lowering himself to the ground against a tree once more.

She looks at him, and then sighs, sitting down as well.

 

They look at the splintered stones for a moment, bits and pieces missing.

Anko’s voice is dry. “Where does it go?”

Kakashi shrugs, wondering if Obito has to sweep where he disappears to. Ha, I bet I littered his whatever place with debris… walnut pieces, stones and a big, big explosion. Out loud, he clicks his tongue, with a bit of a wry smirk. “I’m not sure… but it leaves our realm, that’s for sure.”

Anko grunts. “Handy.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Indeed.” He exhales, and then nods, once. “So?”

Anko grimaces. “I’m going on a mission with Sai and Yamato to find Kabuto.”

Kakashi frowns, deeply. “Now??”

Anko shrugs. “The thing with the robbed graves has the Godaime unsettled a lot. She thinks they’ve been collecting material.”

Kakashi nods. “Yes, I know. For Edo Tensei.” He grimaces. “So she wants you to find him and retrieve the materials.” And kill Kabuto. And Orochimaru, if you can.

Anko nods. “Yes.” She inhales, deeply. “I’ll try not to kill Sasuke if I should encounter him.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away. So Tsunade has not shared all the information. Has not told the others that Sasuke is with Obito now. He clicks his tongue, settling on a simple: “Thank you.”

Anko tilts her head, shoots him a look, her tone amused. “So you don’t want to tell me either?”

Kakshi snorts, and then shrugs. “Well, if she didn’t…”

Anko scoffs, and then pushes herself up, with a grunt. 

Kakashi squints up at her, her face now in shadow. 

Her voice is grave, echoing somehow. “Keep Konoha save for me while I’m away, will you.”

Kakashi swallows, hearing what she doesn’t say. ‘Keep him safe, too.’ He exhales, and then smiles, giving her a careful, sincere eye-smile. “I will.”

 

With my life.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The night is fraught with dark dreams once more, and the moon, too bright.

 

The dreams conjure the invisible shape of the Death God, and Minato, screaming.

Broken landscapes, and blood, and pain.

 

 

When the dawn breaks he is not glad for it.

 

But he knows what to do anyways.

 

 

 

 

He goes by Kurenai’s house, patiently waiting till she opens the door, looking tired and a bit undone, but happy to see him, Mirai gnawing on her fist on her arm.

Her eyes light up, as does her voice. “Kakashi. You’re a god-send. Here, you take her for a moment.” 

Kakashi grunts, accepting Mirai with a bit of a stammer. “Oh, ah, alright?” He carefully shifts the now almost three months old baby onto his shoulder, following Kurenai in when she waves at him. “Glad to be of help?” 

Kurenai laughs gently, while ushering him into the living room. “Oh, very much so. Here. Sit down, play with her or cuddle her and I…” She trails off, and then shrugs, a bit sheepishly. “I’ll take a shower, okay?”

Kakashi blinks, and then snorts, gently rocking Mirai in his arms. “She doesn’t like to let you out of her sight?”

Kurenai groans softly, and shakes her head. “No, it’s always a literal screaming concert when I want to leave her alone for the shortest time… but she seems quite happy with you, as we know, so…?”

Kakashi looks at her, and then sits down with Mirai on the floor, back against the couch, propping his knees up and leaning Mirai against them. Who gurgles happily, munching toothlessly on her fist. He grins at her, carefully, and then tilts his head up for a moment. “We’ll be fine.”

Kurenai hesitates for a second, and then hurries off, and Kakashi exhales, forcing himself to relax, forcing himself to actually, fully feel the joy he feels at seeing the baby. 

Mirai drools around her little fist.

Kakashi pulls down his mask, and grins at her, broadly. Mirai squeals, and kicks, almost hitting him in the jaw, and he laughs out loud, tickling her a bit. Her big red eyes close in glee, and she laughs, squirming in his grip. He gentles his tickles again, and then carefully strokes her, offering her his thumbs to hold onto, her little, wet fists easily fitting into his hands. He holds them for long moments, remembering other hands, and other fingers, and he starts, when she places her hand on his shoulder. 

Her voice is soft, warm. “Remembering things?”

Kakashi sniffs, and blinks, with a nod, only now realizing he’s cried while smiling. His voice is brittle. “Yes… and no.” He swallows, shooting her a look, while playing with Mirai’s hands. “I used to guard Naruto, when he was still so little, because…” He trails off.

Kurenai hums, settling next to him, smelling of shampoo and water. “No-one else came?”

Kakashi shakes his head, once. His tone is gruff. “No.”

She sighs, and then leans in, putting her head on his shoulder. Her voice is almost inaudible, infinitely kind. “I promise I always go to her. I will always be there for her.”

He cackles, and then tickles Mirai again, listening to her happy squealing, with a wavering smile. “I know.” He inhales, deeply, and then tilts his head to her, laying his head gently on hers. “About that… I… I want you to take a vacation.”

He feels her shiver, her tone low. “A vacation?” 

He nods. “Yes. Take… Take Mirai and leave, for a while.”

She lifts her head, looking at him, intently. “A while?”

He exhales, softly, while grinning at Mirai, the duality of his feelings and his words tearing at him. “Yes, why don’t you visit Sora? Spend the summer? She’d love that, I know it.” Please. Let me protect you at least.

Kurenai blinks at him, and he shoots her a look, with a sniff. “Please.”

Kurenai closes her eyes for a long moment. “Alright.”

And Kakashi exhales, deeply. “Thank you.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Unfortunately, Iruka is having none of it.

He just blinks at Kakashi, his tone flat. “And what of all the children, hmm, Kaka-kun? What of them? I’m their teacher, I’m not going to abandon them.”

 

 

 

Kakashi whet’s the blade of his father’s tanto, just in case. Grimly. Fatalistically.

Knowing Tsunade is not evacuating because they literally have no clue who, where and when. And a panic wouldn’t help.

 

And they’d be fodder, out in the open.

 

 

He gnashes his teeth.

Fine. I’ll protect you the old-fashioned way then.

 

With everything I have.

 

 

 

The late summer is hot, and beautiful.

Naruto’s absence is like a hole, throbbing.

 

 

 

 

Autumn comes, with obvious winds of change, almost tangible in the air somehow.

 

Konoha is holding its proverbial breath.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

When the attack comes, it comes swiftly, and brutal.

 

Kakashi just follows his gut, to get him where he needs to be.

 

He catches the black rod in his hand before it can punch through Iruka’s head, dammit, his voice calmer than he feels. By leagues. “One half of your group loudly wreaking havoc to divert our attention, while the other half hunts in the shadows.”  

And the weird purple eyes, staring at me. Kakashi blinks, slowly, with an effort. But it’s not the eyes we search for. These are… void somehow. Remote. He frowns, and tilts his head back to Iruka. “Take him to safety. Leave this to me.”

Iruka blinks up to him, while reaching for the man he’d tried to help before. He swallow, his voice suffused with a myriad of feelings. “Good luck, Kakashi.”

Kakashi tries not to react, his gut churning. Thank you, Iru-kun. 

 

The moment Iruka is gone, Pain attacks, Pain that looks so much like that boy on that photo, like Yahiko, and Kakashi raises the mud wall, immediately, full strength, but the black rod pierces his shoulder nonetheless. He falls back, grunting in pain and holding onto the rod, while conjuring chidori in his right hand, the sharingan tracking now, burning.

He punches… and misses.

 

Reality… stumbles. 

 

WHAT?

He can evade THAT?

 

Pain’s purple eyes are unblinking, staring at him. 

Recognizing him. “The copy ninja Kakashi… it is an honor to meet you.” Pain tilts his head. “Where is the nine tails?”

Kakashi scoffs, darkly. As if I would tell you. He jumps back, dislodging the rod from his flesh, the pain an afterthought. “That’s a silly question.” He clicks his tongue. “There is not a single one of us who would sell out a comrade.” And especially not him.

Never him.

 

Pain tilts his expressionless face, and attacks, with taijutsu. Easily countering him.

Pulling him in… and then pushing him out, giving Kakashi no opening.

Kakashi frowns, while trying to catch himself while being thrown around. Fukasaku said we should take them on one by one, because they would be able to see what the other see… and Jiraiya took on SIX?

 

 

 

That’s CRAZY.

 

 

 

When the second Pain attacks, Kakashi actually gets frantic.

Desperately trying to discern the abilities.

 

Push and pull and body modifications. And mechanical arms rising from flesh.

 

But this one doesn’t look like Yahiko… not like the first one does. Except those small pins and piercings everywhere. 

And his eyes, of course.

 

And Yahiko is dead… 

 

The frantic feeling is subdued again, a bit, as Choza and the others join the fight.

 

 

 

The other Pain is defeated, while tearing through his lightning bunshin, the bunshin almost depleting Kakashi, while the first Pain still stands.

Repelling them, easily, totally unfazed still.

 

 

 

Kakashi tries to come up with a plan, silently panicked.

There is a window of five seconds, when the jutsu recharges. 

We’ll have to use it.

 

 

 

 

They try.

 

 

 

And fail.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The rubble of the ruins that was Konoha crashes his ribcage.

 

He cannot even remember how it happened.

How he got here. 

But breathing is hard.

And painful.

 

Very painful.

There’s blood in his mouth, choking him. 

 

He knows what that means.

 

He blinks, the thought not without humor. So, Obito… this is at far as it goes… me being your eyes and all that. He chuckles, under his breath, the pain lancing through him at the motion. I couldn’t even protect Rin… back then. Nor you. But him… His thoughts turn to Naruto, hopefully still oblivious of the odor of death that covers Konoha now. I broke my promise… please forgive me. 

 

But at least we managed to save you from him.

Them. 

 

He can feel his heartbeat slow, can see the light dim.

 

He sends a last kamui out to help Choji escape, nonetheless, knowing it will be his last.

Knowing it will deplete him. Kill him. Yelling at him to run.

Go. Go tell the others. Help them defeat them.

 

At least I could save you. 

 

And…

 

Keep him safe.

 

 

He tries to see his smile, in his memories at least, one last time, but it’s Minato’s gentle but sad face now, staring at him. 

 

Kakashi sobs, once, turning his gaze to the ones next to Minato. The lilac stripes draw his attention, divert it, the other person there fuzzy, and Kakashi quirks a smile, wondering if Tobi is watching right now. Oh Obito… I… Rin. Sensei. I’m coming to you now.

 

 

I’m coming.

 

 

I’m sorry Naruto.

 

 

 

But the pain’s gone.

 

 

It’s gone.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Blackness.

 

 

Blackness, absolute.

 

 

 

 

 

 

And then, a soft, flickering light.

 

 

Kakashi follows it, though he does not know why.

 

The White Fang grins up at him, the face belying the reputation gentle. “Kakashi…?”

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a moment that feels like an eternity. His voice echoes, somehow. “So… this is where you were.” Where I couldn’t reach you, in my thoughts.

His father hums, and then nods at the fire, licking at the sky. “Will you tell me your story?”

Kakashi wants to laugh, but it’s alright, isn’t it, I have all the time in the world now, don’t I. He nods, with a gentle smile. “Yes… but it’s a long story. So I want to take my time….”

And Sakumo smirks at him, gently. “Yeah, well… that’s fine.”

Kakashi grins, and then chuckles, watching the mirth echoed in Hatake Sakumo’s face, mixing beautifully with the slight sorrow and… relief. He inhales, the air crisper than he has ever felt it. “Well, you know, father…”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

“And then, as feared, push came to shove, and they attacked the village. And I… did my duty, but I also…” He trails off.

Sakumo hums. “You died for the one you love.”

Kakashi stares into the flames, for a long time. “I did.” In a way.

Sakumo shoots him a look. “How does it feel?”

Kakashi frowns, staring at the horizon, knowing it isn’t real, not this, this in-between, but it’s realer than anything before, too, somehow, the restraints of life and consciousness gone. He shrugs. “Freeing?”

Sakumo hums again, poking at the fire and making the sparks fly. His voice is gentle. “I… waited for you, here, knowing I had to make amends to you.”

Kakashi frown, shaking his head. “No, I…”

Sakumo interjects. “Yes.” He swallows, with a  sigh. “Don’t pity me, time flows different, here. It only seems the blink of an eye since I came here…” He smirks a bit painfully. “What a shame though, that both you and I would die such early deaths… though not as early as your mother.”

Kakashi sniffs. “No matter what the end result was, father… you did your best.” He closes his eyes, reaching for the truth deep within. “I can see that now, and understand you… you who violated all rules to save everyone…” He smirks softly. “I am proud to be your son, now.”

He raises his head, to look at his father, who is fighting his own tears. “Where is Mom?”

Sakumo grins, a bit wobbly. “Waiting for you. And me. On the other side.”

Kakashi blinks. “This isn’t the other side?”

Sakumo laughs. “No, my boy, this is the in-between. The fade. The nexus. The… vestibule.”

Kakashi frowns, looking away. “What are we waiting for?”

Sakumo chuckles. “For something that will happen, and has already happened.“ He tilts his head, gently smirking at Kakashi. “For you to accept what must happen.”

Kakashi pulls a face, weirdly unreceptive of the idea. “What must I accept?”

Sakumo’s face is carefully gentle. “That you have to do something, still.”

Kakashi swallows, turning away with his whole body. “And what, pray tell, would that be.”

 

Sakumo closes his eyes, for a long moment. “You have to accept that you have to return... Even if you don’t feel like it.” 

 

Kakashi scoffs, a tear dropping. “I have to return?”

Sakumo’s voice is gentle. “Yes, for him.” He tilts his head, reaching over to place a hand onto Kakashi’s shoulder. “Don’t you want to?”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment. “I…” He blinks, suddenly not understanding himself. “I should want to return, right.”

Sakumo chuckles softly, and for some reason Kakashi knows his father understands. “Maybe. But I know the peace you feel now… the promise of what is beyond.”

Kakashi blinks, another tear dropping. His voice is toneless. “They are there… and no pain, or regret, or…” His voice drops to a whisper. “Mourning.”

Sakumo squeezes his shoulder, and then turns him with it, just a bit. “No pain, no. No mourning. Never again.” He pulls a bit more, and Kakashi follows it, finally facing his father again. Sakumo smiles, a small smile full of understanding and love. “But regret?” He weighs his head. “I do not know if the other ones that have passed on still feel these things, but I sure did.” He laughs, with a tilt of his head. “That’s why we’re here after all.”

Kakashi grimaces, painfully, pressing a fist to his chest. He presses the words out, in a whisper. “I have mourned and I have grieved for so often and for so long…”

He blinks, remembering reaching for the blessed darkness before. The promise of peace that came with it. Comes with it. 

He swallows.

The words are a lead weight, not wanting to come out, but he forces himself to say them nonetheless. “I just… sometimes I think he would be better off without me.”

Sakumo tilts his head, and Kakashi swallows, looking at the fire for a long moment. 

His voice is raw. “I think he could be happy with Sasuke… maybe. This… bond… it’s been tearing at me, for 16 years now.” He scoffs. “Longer, if you count that time incursion in, too.” He raises his eyes to Sakumo’s, his voice dropping to a whisper. “Why did fate appoint me with a bond like that? With him?” He laughs again, a bit bitterly. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, I definitely know all that is to love about him, but…” He reaches up, wipes at his face, angrily. 

The words come with a  sob. “I try to be a good man.” He laughs, and lets the hand drop again, blinking away the tears. “But I’m actually not.”

Sakumo chuckles. “And why, pray tell, aren’t you?”

Kakashi blinks, very slowly, his words coming haltingly. “Because, if I were, I would let him go.” For an instance, he remembers the chuckle of Iruka as he’d tickled him, the taste of his kiss, hears Jiraiya’s voice, feels the whisper of the words ‘There’s love outside bonds.’ 

He swallows, harshly. “I should let him go.” But I can’t, when I’m there, with him. I can’t. 

The muscles in his jaw jump, as he sets it. “He hasn’t even recognized the bond yet, I should just…” He grins, a bit meanly. “Remove myself from the equation.” The smile drops off his face, like tar. “And spare us both the pain.” He blinks, his voice dropping to a whisper. “God knows what Naruto will do when he finds out that I kept all this from him, all these years… he has a very strong sense of righteousness, you know… and you cannot bend him, not an inch.” He chuckles, eyes unseeing now. “He wears his kindness like a sword, his innocence like a shield.” His naivety like an armor. There’s a small smile on his face now, a true one. “And his strength… he is the best of Minato and Kushina combined, in both powers and…” He trails off, suddenly blushing.

 

Sakumo chuckles. “It’s alright. You can gush about him to me.”

Kakashi snorts, rubbing at his eyes again. “I shouldn’t.” 

Sakumo hums, poking at the fire. “Why not?”

Kakashi shakes his head, slowly, pinching the bridge of his nose. “He is 16. Sixteen. I should not…” He trails off again, with a grimace.

Sakumo tilts his head, and then weighs it. “Appreciating what you will get someday is not necessarily the same as lusting after and especially going after him while he’s underage for the fact itself. Besides, he is almost old enough to make his own decisions…”

Kakashi hisses, with another painful grimace. And then scoffs. “Almost old enough… not with 17, even though he’s officially legal then. But he’s a kid still, in many ways, and he’s never had another relationship? And… But… I’m not sure I‘d manage the line to walk? Not anymore? I…” He breaks off, with a shuddering breath. I long. Terribly.

Sakumo looks at him, and then prompts, gently. “Say it.”

Kakashi looks away, with a sniff. “Say what.”

He can hear his father roll his eyes. “Say it, takara.”

Kakashi snorts, and then sniffs, shooting him a look. “I remember you calling me that…”

His father smiles, softly. “Well, it’s true, isn’t it. You are and will always be takara to me, my precious.” He lifts his chin a bit, looking at Kakashi. “Now say it.”

Kakashi grunts, tone dry. “You’re as bad as Sora.”

Sakumo chuckles, lifting his eyebrows. “I bet. Now…”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Fine. I…” He hesitates, the words heavy on his tongue. “I… long.” He swallows, his voice a whisper, almost inaudible. “I long, terribly.” He blinks. “I want to be close to him, always. I want to hold him, touch him, embrace him, k…” He breaks off, looking away again.

He clears his throat. “I should stay here.”

Sakumo sighs, and then reaches up, to ruffle his hair. Kakashi snorts. 

Sakumo’s voice is gentle. “He needs you. More than you might think.” 

Kakashi scoffs, and shakes his head. “No, I should just stay here… he wants a family and kids, and I…” He grimaces. “I am an old and broken warhorse, scarred physically and emotionally.” He snorts again, tilting his head. “And the wrong gender, too.”

Sakumo waves his hands. “Ah well, that is all fine and noble of you, and there are ways around the last point as you well know.” He hesitates. “But the fact remains that he needs you.”

 

Kakashi reaches up, wipes angrily at his eyes again, blinking away the tears. 

His voice breaks out of him, heated, the words rushed. “And so. You want me to go back? To suffer again? So I can… experience his scorn when he finally finds out? To see him chase after Sasuke, and god knows what will happen when he finds him, though honestly, I think I know and won’t that be fun to watch??” He breaks off, breathing heavily, his voice dropping to a whisper. “My death is probably the best thing for all considered. I can go and finally find some peace. Jiraiya’s here, probably, but Kushina’s here, definitely, Asuma’s here, you’re here, and Mom… Mom.” He smirks, painfully. “And if it’s true what you say, then we won’t even feel the time passing for him, right? I could also just stay here, with you, and wait for him. And the others. Or you could go ahead, and I’ll wait.”

He raises his eyes to the night sky, the sparkle of the stars. “It’s so beautiful and peaceful here. No pain, no hunger, no need… just tranquility and promise.”

He blinks, looking over at his father. “Maybe our bond is supposed to fulfill itself in afterlife.”

 

Sakumo glowers at him.

Kakashi shrugs, and looks back up to the stars.

Sakumo’s voice is quiet, but stern. “You need to return.”

Kakashi sighs, quietly. “Why.” He blinks, and then turns his head. “And how do you know?” He laughs, and shrugs. “I mean, I know nothing?”

Sakumo sighs, drawing a hand down his face. “I know, because…” He trails off.

Kakashi blinks, catching on. “Ohhh… You know, because you’ve been to the other side. You’ve passed on. But you came to greet me.” He frowns, following the thought. “You came back to greet me, because…” Something clicks, and he finishes, voice toneless, the realization like a punch to the stomach. “You knew I wouldn’t pass on.”

Sakumo sighs, shooting him an apologetic look. “I am sorry, my son. It is not your time yet. There is something you have to do, still.”

Kakashi stares at him, flabbergasted. “Something I have to do still? You said that before, but I thought it meant acceptance…” But now I wonder… “As in one thing?” He swallows, ire rising. “And that is why I am sent back? To suffer again? For that one thing?”

Sakumo presses his lips together, his eyes impossibly kind. He reaches over, but Kakashi scoots back a bit, dislodging his hand. 

Sakumo sighs. “I say one thing, but of course it is more. It is the tip of the iceberg I mean. But it is you who must tip the scales…”

Kakashi frowns. “Tip the scales?”

Sakumo closes his eyes, for a long moment. “The child of prophecy can save our world, or throw it into darkness.”

Kakashi stares at him, mind blank. “I…” Why didn’t you tell me, Jiraiya?

Sakumo watches him now, eyes dark, filled with understanding. “You will have to tip the scales.”

Kakashi scoffs, feeling incredibly bitter. And so, once more, I am forced.“Oh, right, no pressure then.” He swallows, tasting bile. “Anything else I’m good for?”

Sakumo reaches for him again, and this time Kakashi endures the touch, as Sakumo cups his face, gently. His father’s voice is infinitely gentle. “You are beyond anything I wished for, Kakashi.” He hesitates, and then continues, thumb stroking gently. “With all you have endured, you always decided to be the better man, to try to be the good man…” Sakumo smiles, a quick, broad smile. “You could have taken the wrong path so often… but you didn’t. And I know it cost you.”

The hand drops away, leaving Kakashi bereft and shivering. 

Sakumo’s voice is a whisper. “I was not as strong as you are.” The smile is back, staying now. “And I cannot wait for you to come into your own.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly. “Come into my own?” He tilts his head, frowning, tone flat. “I’ve just turned 30, I think I have come into my own for a while now.”

Sakumo chuckles, and then shrugs. “Yes, but…” He grins at Kakashi, a bit slyly. “There’s something missing still.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, more than vaguely pissed off. “And I guess that something has maybe to do with the something I have to do still?”

Sakumo shrugs, still grinning. 

 

Kakashi grunts. “Oh, I see it now, you’re making it impossible for me to stay here without being pissed at you, and them, whoever they are, and fate and…” He trails off, glowering a bit at his father.

Sakumo chuckles, and then sighs, with a shake of his head. “Not intentionally, I promise.” He lifts both hands, in a widespread shrug. “But there’s something you have to do, still.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, and then shakes his head.

Sakumo hums, and then reaches out once more, ruffling Kakashi’s hair again. “Kakashi, go back for him. Decide to go back for him. Fulfill your destiny, with him.” The hand glides down to trace Kakashi’s eyebrows, the scar, gently. “Be the man I didn’t know how to be.” Sakumo smirks. “I know you have that in you. But ultimately… just be happy.” The fingers hover over Kakashi’s nose for a moment, and then Sakumo boops Kakashi’s nose, and Kakashi snorts, and then laughs, a quiet little honest laugh.

Sakumo grins. “Trust me, as parents, that is what we want for you.” The hand goes to Kakashi’s neck, holding fast for a long moment. “We will be there, right on the other side, when you come, eventually.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, lets the tears fall.

 

And nods. 

Helplessly. 

Once.

 

Sakumo draws him in, and into an embrace, and for a long moment it is as it was, back then, and everything is alright, and there’s so much love…

 

 

 

And then the light comes, the green light, and it pulls

 

 

 

And it is black, once more.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The pain is back, and the exhaustion.

 

Kakashi snaps up, into a sitting position, with a gasp.

Life fills his lungs, and he grimaces, against the pain of his mending ribs.

 

Choza and Choji are frantic, trying to keep him still, but he’s having none of it, his mind fixed, awareness narrowed down to a single point of focus.

 

 

He gathers his remaining energy, and then scans for chakra, his gut churning. 

For his chakra.

 

It’s there, a ways off, but there, and Kakashi cannot feel the relief - the joy, the pull being all he feels.

All he can recognize. 

 

His body seems to move by itself, rushing through the destroyed remains of Konoha.

 

 

 

 

Naruto.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Naruto stumbles, exhausted, and falls.

 

Kakashi catches him, the weight of him more than he remembers, his limbs aching and shivering, his still mending ribs hurting. But it is as if Kakashi can truly breathe under Naruto’s weight, too, for the very first time.

 

He closes his eyes for a long moment, listens to the thundering of both their hearts. 

 

Naruto shifts, the words suffused with so much feeling that Kakashi could cry. “Sensei Kakashi.”

Kakashi grunts, a bit gruffly, trying to keep his own feelings from spilling over. “Just stay still… I can carry you.”

Naruto sighs, and then his arms come round, as Kakashi hook Naruto’s legs into his elbows. For a moment he just stands there, breathing in, the whiff of salt, and sun, and home heady. 

Feeling the weight.

The reality of it.

Naruto hums, and tightens his arms. His nose pushes into the collar of the armor, and into the hair in Kakashi’s neck. His voice is almost inaudible. “You were dead.”

Kakashi closes his eyes. And then sniffs, once, his voice raw. “I was.” He swallows, his throat clicking. “You checked my chakra?”

Naruto chuckles, and then shifts to press closer. “I sensed it in sage mode.”

Oh. He mastered it… of course. Kakashi tilts his head back, just a bit. Breathes the words. “I am so proud of you.”

Naruto sniffs, and then laughs, pushing his nose through Kakashi’s hair. “Thank you.”

Kakashi exhales, and then starts walking, feeling Naruto nestle in again, grinning. He wallows in the feeling of having him near, close, nothing between them, allows himself to feel it. 

The words come by themselves, there, between them. “I came back for you.”

Naruto hums, and then sighs. “Good.”

Kakashi smiles, painfully. You will never know how much it hurt me… and how good it feels now that I’m back.

 

Naruto inhales deeply, his voice sounding dreamy. “You smell so good.”

Kakashi snorts, while his heart stumbles. “Oh yeah? Like sweat and tears and pain and debris?”

Naruto cackles, but tightens his arms, nestling even closer. “No, more like… Shion.”

Kakashi halts, tilting his head a bit, his voice just a bit too high. “Like Shion???”

Naruto snickers, and then presses his forehead to Kakashi’s shoulder. His voice is muffled. “Like, just… good?”

Kakashi blinks, and then forces himself to resume his way back to Konoha. He carefully infuses his voice with humor, while trying not to hope too much. “Uh huh.”

Naruto snorts, tilting his head back and forth, and then settling back up, with his nose in Kakashi’s neck. His words are almost inaudible. “I want to kiss you.”

Kakashi stumbles, almost falls. 

He catches himself, and then stops, his heart beating in his throat. 

Naruto is a dead weight, boneless and yet frozen, waiting. 

Kakashi closes his eyes. Ah, the maverick ninja that you are, always barging right in. He clears his throat. Tries. “Naruto…”

Naruto whispers, interrupting him. “I sensed it, when I was in sage mode. I checked for you, when Nagato had released the jutsu, and I felt this pull you feel for me, and I…” He trails off.

Kakashi sniffs. And then pushes the words out, his voice breaking on them. “You should not let yourself be trapped in feelings that I feel.” 

There is a pause, and then Naruto laughs, gently. “Baka.”

Kakashi’s chest hurts. He distantly wonders if he’s having a heart attack, because it sure feels like it. Is this it? Is this the moment Naruto recognizes the bond?

He blinks, tilting his head. “Naruto…”

 

There is a yell, from between the trees, in the distance. 

Cries, and vocal jubilations.

Naruto lifts his head, a bit, and Kakashi grimaces, swallowing compulsively. I need to bring him back. This… his return to Konoha is more important. Nothing much has changed, anyway. I still need to wait, I still need to suppress this. 

He sniffs, and then starts forward again, with a shuddering exhale. 

Naruto shifts a bit. “Sensei…”

Kakashi nods, and then whispers. “We’ll talk about it. Later.” Much later.

Naruto exhales, and then relaxes again, against him. “Okay.”

 

They make their way through the last trees, facing the big are of rubble and debris that was Konoha, only a few building remaining standing.

Kakashi can feel Naruto freeze as he sees the all the people running towards them, the cries intensifying.

He smirks softly. “They’ve all… been waiting for your return.” He tilts his head, catches Naruto’s gaze for a split second, before loosening his grip on his legs. “Naruto…” He sighs, and then smirks, lets all his feelings color his voice. “You did well.” So incredibly well.

Naruto blinks, and then straightens, one hand trailing along Kakashi’s back, pressing into it, for just a moment, and the small touch shivers through Kakashi, fraught with meaning, and devastating, hurting much more than carrying him did. 

 

And then the crowd is there, and Kakashi steps back, silently, watching only.

 

Watches, as Sakura first punches Naruto and I really have to talk with her about that then hugs him, crying. 

Watches, as Hinata smiles through her tears.

Watches, as Shikamaru and Choji smirk, the others grinning.

 

Watches, as Iruka’s eyes find his, when Naruto is thrown up into the air.

 

 

And he closes his eyes, and breathes.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

They let him out of the hastily set up hospital tent in the evening, by sheer necessity.

There’s too many wounded still, but at least no-one dying anymore.

 

Though Tsunade has yet to wake up.

 

Kakashi wanders through the camps, nodding, and sharing smiles, but keeps apart from the huddled shapes around the fires still, unable to allow himself to reflect yet, to feel. 

There’s too much. 

And too much risk, coming with the feelings.

 

Right?

 

He shares a glance and a smile with Guy, who is still helping with his team to set up camp, and then wanders on, unable to stay still. 

He smirks to himself, a bit self-deprecatingly. Baka. You cannot run from him. He now has the means to find you, whenever he wants to. He weighs his head. At least when he enters sage mode. 

 

He sighs, and reaches, then leaves the radius of the camp, the fires illuminating it casting wild shadows at the trees and rocks around it.

The trees are whispering, the night clear and beautiful, almost as clear and beautiful as it had been there, isn’t it, and it is peaceful somehow, the loss of material not half as taxing as the loss of lives would have been. But you prevented that. And you not only kept everyone alive, but you defeated the Pains, too. And convinced Nagato.

Laid Yahiko to rest.

Kakashi exhales, and then smiles, when Naruto steps out from behind a tree. There you are. 

 

Aloud, he says something else: “So, sage mode. I hear you have to stay still for that.”

Naruto snorts, falling into step with him. “Yeah, that was a real… pain.” 

They both chuckle a bit, painfully, gently, carefully, and then sober, sharing a quick look. 

Naruto shrugs. “But I mean, I know how to meditate now, efficiently I mean… and I can use my clones for collecting the sen energy for it.”

Kakashi hums, wondering how much the special state of Naruto’s kage bunshin plays into that. “That is handy.” He tilts his head. “I’m amazed you’re not passed out.”

Naruto shrugs again, with a sigh. “I am exhausted, but… I can’t sleep. My head is…”

Kakashi hums, nodding. “Awake. Processing. I know.” He frowns, picking his way through shrubbery. “Where did you want to go?”

Naruto blinks at him. “How do you know I didn’t follow you?”

Kakashi bumps into him, gently, on purpose. “Because I followed you?”

Naruto ducks his head, with a grin. “Right.” He looks up, and Kakashi averts his gaze, noting the blush. He sees Naruto watching him intently for long seconds, from the corner of his eyes, before Naruto averts his gaze again, pointing up the hill. “I wanted to show you.”

Kakashi fights to keep his voice level. “Show me?”

Naruto nods, and then takes his hand, totally matter of fact, dragging him along. “Yes.” 

 

Kakashi tries not to stumble, his world reduced to the palm pressed to his. 

He snorts softly, mentally shaking his head at himself. 

Naruto tilts his head back, and grins, and then starts to run, and Kakashi has no choice but to run after him, with a small curse, and Naruto laughs, and just drags him along.

His voice is floating in the air, carried on levity. “Close your eyes, Sensei.”

 

Kakashi blinks, and then simply does, trusting.

 

The world tumbles into surreality. 

The sounds of their feet is constant, and rhythmic. The heat of Naruto is a furnace. The night air is cool. The trees smell of fall and earth and ozone.

 

Kakashi remembers his own words suddenly, spoken so long ago. ‘I will try to pave your way, if you let me.’ He smirks, the thought peaceful. Looks like you pave my way now.

 

Naruto stops, and Kakashi halts, too, reopening his eyes to a small clearing, his breath fast.

 

A small clearing with something white against a stone, in front of a tree. And a book. And three kunais, wire spanned between them to circumvent the spot.

 

Kakashi exhales, and then sniffs, knowing what sign he’ll find on the stone. 

He pulls at Naruto’s hand and then drops it, pulling him in a one-arm embrace. 

His voice is shaking, words whispered into Naruto’s hair as he nestles into the embrace. “Thank you.”

Naruto hums, his left arm around Kakashi’s waist tightening. “I know you loved him, too.”

Kakashi laughs, and then sobs, once, nodding. Pressing the words out. “I did.”

I do. 

 

They are silent for a long moment, and Kakashi clears his throat, indicating the paper flowers with a nod. “Konan’s?”

Naruto nods. “Yes, she said they’d last for a few years… but I want to come back and set it up properly soon, you know. I mean, I like it this way, but… the book should be in a box so it won’t weather away, and there should be more flowers, and maybe a candle?” He shrugs. “But everything is a mess right now, I didn’t know where to find a box and candle.”

Kakashi nods. “Ah, well, we’ll find everything you need.” Everything you want.

 

Naruto sighs, and then steps out of the embrace, just slightly, before turning to face Kakashi.

Kakashi looks at him, snorting when he finds that Naruto is almost his height now.

Naruto quirks an eyebrow. 

Kakashi shakes his head, shrugging. “Only an inch or so missing now. I bet you’ll be taller than me.”

Naruto grins at him, waggling his eyebrows. “Oh, that will be fun.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, but grins as well, shaking his head once. 

A frown flits over Naruto’s face, and he reaches up, hovering his fingers over Kakashi’s mask. 

He blinks, his words coming haltingly. “Can I?”

Kakashi exhales, and then nods, his throat dry. “Sure.” If not you, then who.

Naruto beams at him and then moves in, just a bit, pulling the mask down, biting his lips.

 

Shivers, running down Kakashi’s spine. 

He exhales and shifts his weight, feeling naked. 

 

 

 

The moment Naruto’s eyes widen he knows, and he scolds himself, viciously. 

Baka. How could you? He has already told you, what did you think would happen? This is Naruto, this is who he is, always barging right in, always pushing, always so brave, always so…

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thoughts stop, as Naruto’s lips touch his.

 

Electricity, singing.

Body heat, so close.

The smell of summer and sun, and home, right there.

 

 

A whisper of a touch, dry and light and careful… thundering.

 

Burning.

 

 

 

 

And something, deep, deep, deep in Kakashi… snaps.

 

 

Uncoils. Whips. Convulses. 

Bursts. 

Into need. 

 

 

 

Naruto grunts in surprise as Kakashi flips and presses him against the tree, shifts, pulls Naruto into a full embrace, and tilts his head, and the kiss… 

 

Kakashi had known it would be like this.

Had known that the taste of him would be everything he ever wanted.

Had known that the taste of them would be utterly addictive, ferociously delicious.

Had known that the glide of Naruto’s tongue would be so sensuous, and wonderful.

Had known that the little moans and breaths would be all he wanted to hear, for eternity.

Had known that he would never, ever want to let him go again.

 

 

Had known.

 

 

 

Naruto moans into the kiss, brokenly, shivering under his gliding hands.

Tilts his head, starting to demand, to kiss back. 

 

 

 

 

Lust slams through Kakashi’s body.

 

 

 

It’s…

 

 

 

 

Kakashi rips himself away, stumbling back.

 

He presses the back of his hand against his mouth, shivering, squeezing his eyes shut against the vision of Naruto standing against the tree still, looking…

 

Kakashi grunts, suppressing the thought.

 

Any thought. 

 

 

 

 

Their panting is heavy in the air.

 

Kakashi straightens up, turns away.

He doesn’t recognize his own voice. Nor the words. “We should go back.”

 

Naruto’s throat clicks, his voice shivering. “Sensei…”

 

Kakashi smirks painfully. Ah yes, Sensei. Right. He closes his eyes, reaching for strength he doesn’t really have. He clears his throat, deciding to take that proverbial bull by the horns. 

And use it.

His voice carries his bitterness, but also steel, steel that takes an humongous amount of effort to force into the words. “Yes, that’s right, I’m your Sensei.” He swallows again, tone gruff now. “And I apologize. That was uncalled for, and way out of line. You’re way too young to be taken advantage of like that.”

Naruto’s voice is indignant, with a bit of incredulity. “Taken… advantage of?”

Kakashi smiles grimly, but sighs. Repeating. Clinging to it. “I’m your Sensei.” I should know better. I HAVE to know better. For now. Still.

Naruto steps around him, eyes flitting back and forth, expression petulant. “You are much more than that, and we both know it?”

Kakashi closes his eyes, with a painful grimace. “Maybe. But some facts still remain.” He reopens his eyes, tries to level Naruto with a stern gaze. “I am your Sensei, and as such, I have to stop this here, and now.” For now. At least for now. 

Naruto’s expression is pinched now, with a pout. Hard. “And so… I cannot make my own decisions?”

Kakashi gasps a laugh, looking away for a second. “Not when it comes to me.” Not for another year. At least.

Naruto scoffs, eyes blazing, his fury open in his tone. “Are you shitting me?”

Kakashi grimaces.

Naruto’s voice is heated now, definitely indignant. “I have killed, I have cried, I have loved, I have fucking saved this village, and obviously destroyed it, too, but I cannot decide who I want?”

Kakashi flinches, as if struck. He shivers, unable to answer, trying not to break under the weight of Naruto’s definitely righteous ire. 

Valid ire.

 

Naruto takes a step towards him, and Kakashi stumbles back, knowing that if Naruto were to touch him now…

 

Naruto hisses through his teeth, and then averts his gaze, looking over at Jiraiya’s memorial for a long moment. 

When he speaks again, his voice is dark, the words cutting, with pain wrapped around, like barb wire. “Fine. You know what, fine. If you don’t want this, then who am I to force you.”

Kakashi whispers, brokenly, wanting to scream in frustration. “Naruto, I…” There is no-one I want more. Please, just…

Naruto pulls a face, raising his hands defensively. “Forget it. I…” He gesticulates towards Konoha, his face a grimace. “I’ll just go. Maybe I can find a cake somewhere, in all the rubble.”

Kakashi blinks, his mind latching onto the word. “Cake?”

And Naruto laughs at him, viciously, while stepping back. He spreads his arms. “Yeah, well, happy birthday to me, I guess.” He drops his arms, with a snarl. “What a joke.”

 

 

And he’s gone, and Kakashi stares at the spot he’s been in, at the afterimage, for hours, his memory of his own thought, back then, echoing hollowly through his mind.

 

 

 

What a joke.

 

 

 

 

Indeed.

 

 

 

 

And he feels a bit like dying… again. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

(Sorry?)

Chapter 32: Picking up the pieces

Notes:

I had first planned to bring Danzo back here (as in Shippuden), buuuutttt…. While there’s ways to compensate my changes so far… I hate his guts (and, lets be real, he doesn’t actually do much in canon here, except annoy the audience with his audacity - and deliver that nice fight with Sasuke, but there’s no-one from Konoha there to witness that, so…).
And I’m changing the order of things here, just a bit.

Chapter Text

 

 

 

Kakashi goes through the rubble of the jonin complex the next day, helping Ibiki and Ebisu and the others push away the larger pieces. 

There is a weird levity to their actions, their apartments gone, their possessions everywhere and possibly destroyed, but… 

Kakashi bends down, pulls out a few broken photo frames, carefully taking out the pictures of someone’s relatives and putting them into the wrap he’s carrying instead of a backpack. 

Guy is over on the other side, pulling out still intact beams, for reuse.

Next to him, a few feet away, Genma sighs, shooting him a look. “I guess there’s not much left.”

Kakashi hums, bending down again to pull out a couch pillow in a grizzly pattern, dusting it off. “Anything we can possibly save from here will help.” He looks back at the desolation that was Konoha, where there’s people going through the remains of their houses everywhere. “There must be lots of things we can salvage still.”

Genma nods, with a sigh. “And food.”

Kakashi nods, with a grimace. “Yeah, that would be good. It takes a moment, until supplies from the outskirts reach us…” He shoots a look to where the market area used to be. “I could do with some onigiri’s right now… or ramen.”

Genma laughs, pushing away some stones to get at some clothes. “Yeah, I bet the loss of Ichiraku’s is what has Naruto in such a foul mood today.”

Kakashi grimaces, carefully averting his gaze. That, too. But I bet I’m totally the one to blame there. Out loud he sighs, eventually. “They’ll rebuild it… I’m glad the villagers do not hate him for the destruction…”

Genma weighs his head, whistling when he finds a package of sweets. He clicks his tongue. “Yeah, but only because no-one died I bet.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “If we’d be digging through a mass grave right now, that would be quite different.”

Kakashi swallows, his throat clicking. “Yeah.” He frowns, pushing a piece of wood away to reveal an almost intact cabinet, still filled with packages of rice and spices. “Oh, yes.”

Genma grunts. “Food!!”

They both chuckle. 

Kakashi kneels down to empty the cabinet.

Genma moves over a pile of rubble. “I heard you learned how to use the hiraishin kunai.”

Kakashi blinks, shooting him a look. “Maybe?”

Genma grins, pushing the little toothpick he’s chewing on into the other corner of his mouth. “Sensei Minato taught me the Flying Thunder God Formation, as you may remember.”

Kakashi blinks, straightening up. “Right, you were part of his squad for a while.” You are one that went into bodyguard duty… and survived.

Genma nods, bending down to pull out several jonin jackets. “For a while, yes. I might be one of the last ones to know it. With Raido and Iwashi that is.”

Right. You’re the ones always called to teleport people if needed. Kakashi hums, looking over at him, tone dry. “Guess we need to share notes at some point.”

Genma grins, smacking his lips, when he finds a can with peaches. “Absolutely.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The piles of things recovered keep growing, the people going around the mounds trying to find remnants of their lives swarming over and around them, looking like ants from a distance.

 

Kakashi pushes his hand into his pocket, insanely glad he put the pebble into it.

His father’s tanto is slightly bent but unmistakably recognizable, laying off to the side, the clan signature on the handle calling to Kakashi when he steps up to the weapon’s pile. 

He’s glad he’s attached the hiraishin kunai to it, with a leather band and an intricate knot, a while ago. And that the attachment held firm.

He shoots a look at the tower, the building bruised, but still standing. I’m so glad that yours is still in her office, Jiraiya. He smiles softly, blinking up at Minato’s stone head for a moment. What do you think of me now, now that my father has… He frowns, amending his own thought. But you’re not there, are you. I only conjured what I wanted to see when I died, not what really waited for me. Or who… You’re in hell still, fighting for eternity. 

 

He grimaces, tasting bile.

 

Shizune calls over, from the pile with odds and ends. “Kakashi-san!”

He lifts his head, lets the thought go, with an effort. “Yes?”

Shizune holds up a box, a tin box, with a dog that suspiciously resembles Pakkun engraved into the lid. “I think this is yours?”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, exhaling deeply. The photos. Thank god. He nods, giving her an eye-smile. “Yes.” He grips the tanto and kunai tightly and hops over, taking the box from her carefully. “Thank you so much, Shizune-san.” He carefully opens the small lock, fully relaxing when the photos appear when he opens the lid of the slightly bent box. “The value of these is immeasurable.”

Shizune quirks an eyebrow, and he holds it out for her to look into. She pushes at a few of them, and then grins. “Indeed.” She steps back, grinning up at him. “Show them to me properly at some point?”

Kakashi grins, and inclines his head. “With pleasure.”

He steps back, and then hesitates, staring at the box. He shrugs, raising his eyes to hers. “Think there might be a candle I could use around?”

Shizune snorts. “One?”

Kakashi blinks and looks over to another heap, one made up of flammable and usable materials. “Right.”

Shizune waves at him. “Just take one. We’ll never be able to pick them apart anyways.”

Kakashi nods, silently concurring. “Thank you.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He puts the photos into the back of Icha Icha Tactics in his bag, and then stares at the book, for a very long moment, the relief that his house was outside the event horizon and that his books are safe… He swallows, feeling slightly guilty.

 

And then he concentrates, reaching, sighing in relief when he feels Naruto there, off to the side between the building materials, but there.

He waits until there’s a gap in the stream of visitors - apparently everyone wanting a chat with their savior, despite his obvious bad mood - and then jumps over, trying desperately to seem relaxed. “Yo.”

Naruto glowers at him, pout and all. Silently. 

Kakashi sighs. And then holds out the box, and the candle. “I found these.”

Naruto stares at the items, and then reaches out and takes them, after a while, with a sniff. He nods once, quietly. 

Kakashi swallows. He forces the words out. “Naruto, please underst…”

Naruto interjects, hissing. “Understand? Don’t you dare to ask me for understanding.” His voice drops even more, eyes burning into Kakashi’s. “I understood everything when I was in sage mode. There is literally no use in lying to me, Sensei.”

Kakashi grimaces, closing his eyes for a moment. 

Naruto continues, stepping closer, tone biting. “But I guess feelings and thoughts are two different things, hmm? And obviously you still think me a child, and immature, and stupid, and as such I am really glad we figured that part out.”

Kakashi presses his lips together, reopening his eyes to Naruto’s burning ones. “I don’t…”

Naruto interjects again, tone heated. “Oh, you don’t? Don’t what. Don’t think that? Don’t like me like that?” There is a smile on Naruto’s face, sharp and quick. His voice is a whisper. “Don’t want me?” This time the grin is not as sharp, a vulnerability in it that tears at Kakashi. “Don’t…”

“Stop.” Kakashi’s voice is a whiplash, and Naruto falls silent, swallowing harshly. 

Kakashi exhales, shudderingly, his words almost inaudible. “I wished I could change many things, but you are one of the best things in my life, Naruto, the one good thing that I cling to. I meant it when I said I came back for you.“ He hesitates. "And I wished I could tell you everything, but I can’t, not yet.” Not yet… but it must be soon. 

Please let it be soon.

Naruto’s face twists, and then crumbles, and a tear drops. His voice is raw. “And I wished I could hate you, but I can’t.”

I bet. Kakashi closes his eyes, and then steps closer and opens his arms, silently, and Naruto falls into them, with a sob. 

And Kakashi cries with him. 

 

And smiles.

 

 

 

 

Oh. Thank god. 

 

 

 

 

We’ll be alright.

 

 

 

Eventually. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

Naruto yells out loud when he sees them, pushes the box and candle at Kakashi, and rushes to the small pots. 

Kakashi follows at a more sedate place, chuckling gently. “Someone saved some of your plants.” He looks up and searches for Iruka, but cannot see him. Probably back at the bunkers, tending to the kids. But I just know you went to the effort and retrieved them. You’re a saint. 

Naruto sniffs, and then blinks up to him. "Sensei Iruka?“ 

Kakashi hums. "I bet.“

Naruto frowns. "Think we‘ll find Mr. Ukki, too?“

Kakashi weighs his head, definitely mourning the little plant. "I don’t think so, I‘m sorry. The complex was searched and they’re removing the debris already, to rebuild is as soon as possible.“

"Ah.“ Naruto frowns and sighs, but then his face clears up. "You‘ll get a brand new apartment.“

Kakashi chuckles. “Or something similar. And I‘ll have to rebuy Icha Icha.“

Naruto’s eyes snaps to his. “Your books!”

Kakashi holds up a hand to calm him, and then hums. “Good thing I didn’t take a book last time, hmm?”

Naruto smirks. His eyes flicker down to the bag Kakashi wears, and then back up to his eyes. “You kept the advance copy with you?”

Kakashi exhales softly. “Always.”

Naruto closes his eyes for a moment. “Good.” He grins and then quirks an eyebrow, while gathering his pots. “As cheesy and raunchy as the books are at times, there is something about them that I really enjoy.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, foregoing the normally obligatory comment regarding Naruto’s age. “It’s Jiraiya’s irreverence that suffuses his books. His sheer force of personality.” He snorts. “In every aspect.”

Naruto chuckles, straightening up. He indicates the plants. “Think I can put them in the tent?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Not sure if they will be continuously assigned?” He blinks, looking up at the Hokage heads. “Why don’t we ask if we can put them in the bunkers? A few living things in the windows would do the kids holed up in there good.”

Naruto’s expression lights up. “That would be cool. I wanted to go and check with Konohamaru anyways.”

Kakashi looks down at the box and the candle. “Want me to come along? Or do you want me to bring these to the… clearing?”

Naruto blinks, and then looks down at the plants in his arms, before staring at the box for a moment. He sighs through his nose. “I want to come along to the clearing.” He hesitates. “But I also want to spend some time alone with Konohamaru, you know, because…” He trails off blushing, and Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. Naruto continues, bravely. “You’re distracting.”

Kakashi blinks, trying to stomp on the rather succinct feelings that want to rise. 

He clears his throat. “I see.” He looks down at the box, and then over to the large tent where he knows that the command center is set up right now. He sighs. “It’s probably time that I show up and check back with Tsunade and Shizune anyways. You go and have fun with them.”

Naruto ducks his head just a bit. “Alright.”

Kakashi hesitates, and then turns away slightly. “Please come and rescue me though.” 

 

He leaves, to Naruto’s snicker following him.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Kakashi-san!!”

Kakashi frowns, senses twitching due to the tone of Shizune’s voice. Uh oh. He blinks, stepping carefully closer to the desk. “Yes?”

She sighs, pushing a wisp of hair out of her face. “We’ve been looking for you.”

He frowns. “We?”

Shizune sighs. “Yes, the council, Shikaku and I.”

Kakashi grimaces, already knowing where this is going. “She hasn’t woken up?”

Shizune shakes her head. “No. The amount of chakra she used to keep the villagers alive was massive. I don’t doubt that she’ll wake up, but…” 

Kakashi sighs, reaching up with his left hand to pinch the bridge of his nose. “But you have no idea when.”

They are both silent for a moment, Shizune looking at her feet. 

Kakashi shrugs, finally. “So, what were her instructions?”

Shizune quirks her head, quoting. “In case of her death, you are to be named Hokage. In case of her continued inability to fulfill her position, you shall step in until she is conscious again or… dies.”

Kakashi grunts, and then sighs, deeply. “Concise.”

Shizune quirks an eyebrow. “Yes.”

Kakashi grimaces, nodding at the entrance to indicate the camps. “But everything is already in motion, isn’t it? Is there really a big need for me to take over?”

Shizune smirks, softly. “A lot of people are organizing themselves, yes.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, hearing the undertone. “But?”

Shizune sighs, deeply, and then pulls out a scroll. “We have received a report that Sasuke and three other ninjas have tried to abduct the Land of Lightning’s jinchuriki.”

Kakashi grimaces again, taking the scroll, but he looks at her. “Tried?”

Shizune smirks, grimly now. “The jinchuriki, Killer-B, he tricked them, sacrificing a part of his bijou to get away.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Clever… the bijou consented to that?”

Shizune tilts her head, with a sigh. “Apparently he has quite a different relationship to his bijou… I have heard that they are on friendly terms.”

Kakashi stares at her. “They’re friends?” If Naruto would manage…

Shizune nods. “Apparently, yes.” She lowers her voice. “Which is why Tsunade has made a conscious effort to get our countries to work closer together. She hoped that if we could manage to trust each other…”

Kakashi nods, staring into space. “Naruto and Killer-B could meet up and exchange experiences.”

Shizune sighs. “Yes.” She clears her throat. “Which is also why it is imperative now that we meet up with the Raikage and the others and discuss what has happened. As is probably understandable the Raikage is more than annoyed by an Uchiha trying to abduct his chosen brother.”

Kakashi winces, deeply. “I can imagine.” Dammit Sasuke. What exactly did Obito offer you for you to do his dirty work? He sighs, through his nose. “When?”

Shizune frowns. “The meeting?” Kakashi nods. She sighs. “In three weeks. You will need to leave four days before. They decided to hold it in the Land of Snow, with the Samurais as neutral hosts.”

“Alright.” He taps his finger to the box. “Anything else?”

Shizune winces. “Yes. There are… reports of the Yondaime’s grave having been defiled in the wake of Pain’s destruction. Apparently when we all were looking somewhere else.”

Kakashi stares at her, shocked into silence. What?

Shizune grimaces, her voice dropping to be almost inaudible. “And Asuma’s, Kushina’s… and a few others’, too.”

Kakashi breathes the word. “Fuck.”

She nods, mutely. 

He blinks rapidly, whispering harshly. “Who knows about this?”

She shakes her head once. “Just you, me, and Shikaku and the intelligence division. And the Anbu squad who discovered it.”

Kakashi grimaces. “Too many.” Word will get out.

Shizune snorts, bitterly. “That’s what Shikaku said, too.”

Kakashi reaches up, and massages his temple. He swallows, and then closes his eyes for a moment. “Alright. Please prepare for my official… announcement. Right before I leave. But lets keep it quiet until then, okay? I will take Yamato along to the conference.”

She quirks an eyebrow. “Just Yamato?”

He shakes his head once, grimacing a bit. “We may not have lost lives, but we cannot afford to spread out our resources even more, now. I trust Yamato. And we can move faster if we’re alone.” He snorts. “That is, if Naruto doesn’t hear of it.”

She snorts too, her eyes sparkling. “Yeah, well, if he hears of it there’s no way you will be able to leave him here.”

He sighs, rubbing his face. “I know.” He rolls his head, the muscles in his shoulders locked. “Fine. We’ll see. For now…” He looks down at the box, and shrugs. “He’s going to be here soon. There’s something we have to do.”

Shizune smiles at him, for a moment, and then places a hand onto his upper arm. “Why don’t you go and eat something, Kakashi-san? I hear they made some nice fried rice with the found supplies.”

Kakashi nods, his stomach rumbling, as if on cue. 

He inhales, and then grins. “Good idea.”

 

I’ll need my strength.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Sensei!!”

Kakashi looks up, swallowing the last bit of his simple but delicious fried rice down. He puts the bowl away with a little bow to the people helping with the food, giving them a careful eye-smile, and then turns to Naruto, who skids to a halt in front of him, grinning broadly.

 

Naruto starts speaking, the words rushed, and happy, uncaring for the other people around them. Kakashi takes his elbow and leads him a bit away, already guessing what is to come, judging by Naruto’s expression. “Sensei, imagine, Konohamaru went into my apartment when he heard that Pain was there, and he packed a lot of my belongings into a box, and he hid it with the emergency supplies, can you believe it?”

Kakashi smiles softly, Naruto’s eyes glowing, and then raises his finger to his mouth for a moment, his voice low. “Shh, Naruto. While that is awesome, and extremely brave of Konohamaru, a lot of people have lost literally everything… hearing that Konohamaru knew beforehand…”

Naruto blinks. “But he didn’t know when Pain would come? He just did it on a hunch when…?”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows.

Naruto pulls a face. “You’re right, he probably listened in on meetings.” He groans. “That would be typical…” His face clears again, the happy note back in his voice, though he keeps it lower now. “But anyways, he not only managed to save my old suit and the goggles, and my plush… but he also went into the bathroom and got the brush!!”

Kakashi blinks, and then snorts, shaking his head once. “I’m glad.”

Naruto beams at him. 

 

Kakashi tilts his head. “Anything else?”

Naruto grins broadly, blushing a bit. “Konohamaru managed to kill one of the Pains with a rasengan.” Naruto ducks his head, while scratching it. “I’m so proud of him.”

Kakashi blinks, honestly impressed. “Wow. That is amazing.” At his age?

Naruto grins. “Right? He saved Ebisu.” He snickers. “Serves the old pervert right.”

Kakashi snorts. “Still holding a grudge?”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “Not reaaallllyyyyy.” He shoots a look at Kakashi. “But honestly, not even Jiraiya reacted that strongly to my harem jutsu.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, shaking his head. “I do not want to know.”

 

Naruto grins, and then looks over where Kakashi put the box and the candle down for his meal. “Wanna go up with me now?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Don’t you want to eat first?”

Naruto shakes his head. “No, I had some cup ramen at the bunkers.”

Kakashi laughs gently, shaking his head. “And of course that is preferable to rice.”

Naruto grins, but blushes, just slightly. 

Kakashi exhales, and then steps back to get the box and candle. “Alright. Lead the way.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

This time, Naruto doesn’t take his hand, and if Kakashi is completely honest… he’s a bit disappointed. And furious at himself. Baka. Again, what did you expect? He literally reached for you intimately yesterday, and you rejected him. Kakashi scoffs to himself. Well, not immediately. 

 

Not as fast as I should have.

 

Their way up to the small clearing is silent, and Kakashi stops at the edge of it once more, with a look at Naruto. Who tilts his head back at him, expression weird. 

Kakashi exhales, and then offers him the box and candle, and Naruto smiles gently, painfully, accepting the items, shifting them so they are in his left hand.

 

His voice is a whisper, the blue eyes so bright in the sun. “I know that you cannot… and do not want to talk about yesterday…” Kakashi grimaces, resisting the urge to tap his foot, and Naruto continues, fidgeting just a bit. “But I want to.” He blinks. “And I can.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, and then nods, silently. Accepting. He swallows.

Naruto exhales, looking away for a moment. He clicks his tongue. “I’ve been thinking… “ His eyes return to Kakashi’s, and Kakashi endures their intensity, with an effort. “I have sensed… felt your need for me… the depth of it.” Naruto laughs gently, looking away with a blush. “It’s been sobering.” He swallows, his gaze returning once more, bravely locking their gazes. “And the kiss…” His right hand comes up to his face, fingers touching his lower lip. “You were starved.” He hesitates. “Are starved.”

Kakashi closes his eyes. Willing him to stop. Praying for him to go on, too, something in him hurting so, so good. Needing this, like a cleansing fire.

Naruto’s voice drops to a whisper. “And I loved it.”

Kakashi exhales a shuddering breath. His thoughts are running in circles.

Don’t. 

Don’t break me. 

Because I will. 

 

I will break for you. 

 

There is the vague sensation of movement, and Kakashi reopens his eyes, warily. Not trusting himself. Or Naruto, right now. 

Naruto is right in front of him, staring at him, intently. 

His eyes drop to the mask.

Kakashi swallows, his voice gravelly. The word takes an enormous effort to shape. “No.” He hesitates. “I’m sorry.” You have no idea how sorry I am.

Naruto nods, slowly, and then his right hand comes up, slowly, as not to spook him, and glide into Kakashi’s hair, fingers threading through… and then he pushes Kakashi’s head down, just a bit, and presses a kiss under Kakashi’s eye, right there, on the vulnerable skin. 

Kakashi cannot breathe, the world gone once more, reduced to Naruto and Naruto alone.

 

Naruto whispers against his skin, sending shivers down Kakashi’s spine. “Do all other kisses taste like yours?” Kakashi grunts, jerking under the heat of Naruto’s lips, helpless in the soft grip of his fingers. Breath feathers along his lashes. “Or is it just you that makes my guts churn like this. Makes my skin tingle.” He hums. “Shion’s didn’t.”

Kakashi shivers, unable to form words.

Naruto’s lips glide, just a bit, to hover at the corner of Kakashi’s eye now. 

The words are a whisper, finding their goal, unerringly. “I wonder if Sasuke would taste the same though. Feel the same.”

Kakashi jerks, pain lancing through him, but he makes himself endure it, lets it run through, the jealousy sublime in its simplicity. The thought comes with waves and waves of self-loathing. And an abstract kind of humor. Yeah. I deserved that. Definitely. 

Naruto’s lips glide down to his ear now, breath puffing against it, sending shivers deep, deep down into Kakashi’s gut. Making it difficult to breathe. “One year until society sees me as an adult…” The lips glide down, nip at Kakashi’s right earlobe. Kakashi fights the feeling, the arousal. Knowing it’s a losing battle. Willing Naruto to stop. 

Please stop. 

Naruto chuckles softly, obviously aware of his battle. “I wonder what I’ll learn in that year.”

 

And he steps back, fingers gliding from Kakashi’s hair, and Kakashi stumbles, his center of gravity wanting to follow Naruto somehow, his legs shaking.

He reopens his eyes, the covered and uncovered one, staring at Naruto. Wildly.

There are no words in his mind, nor in his heart, just this need and arousal, and abject horror at being so fucking transparent.

His tongue feels thick in his mouth. “Naruto, I…”

Naruto smiles, too sweetly for what he just did. For how expertly he played Kakashi. “It’s alright, Sensei.” He sobers just a bit, the smile growing more real. “But I needed to… tell you.” He swallows. “Show you.”

Kakashi snorts, and then laughs, almost sincerely, while his soul flutters. “My absolute helplessness when it comes to you?”

Naruto smiles softly, nose scrunched. “I’ve always been aware of it I think... Aspects of it… Of something at least. The awareness changed over the years.”

Kakashi swallows, tone gruff. “And it will change still, I promise you that.” When you’re finally adult, grown… though that might take a while longer, than that one year. You’re not adult with 17, even if you legally are… and you still hadn’t any kind of relationship outside friendships and… me.

Kakashi swallows again, harshly.

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, tone a bit off. “I see.”

They stare at each other, for a long moment.

 

Kakashi sighs, eventually, feeling mightily done. He gestures towards the stone with Jiraiya’s name on it. “Come on, Naruto. Let’s… do what we came here for.”

Naruto smirks softly, and then nods, stepping up and carefully wiping the book off before putting it into the box. 

He places it next to the flowers, and puts the candle in front, hesitating and then looking up at Kakashi. “Can you light it, Sensei?”

Kakashi hums, quirking an eyebrow. “Sure.”

Naruto smirks at him, watching him prepare a fire release mini fireball. 

Kakashi spits it at the candle and they chuckle for a moment, watching the flame catch. 

Naruto frowns. “I cannot do other elemental styles yet.”

Kakashi hums, and then shrugs. “You are unique. And so your way will be as well. Maybe you will master the elements one day, or you won’t, but I do not doubt that you will be extraordinary.”

Naruto blushes, and ducks his head.

Kakashi looks at him, at the fine profile. The whiskers, glowing in the sun. He clicks his tongue. “I heard that Hinata has tried to help you against Pain.”

Naruto hums. “Not just tried. She managed to pull some of the rods out of my body, and she held her ground for quite a while… she threw the Lion Fists at him. She was amazing.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “She also told me she loved me.”

Kakashi blinks, surprised, but then again, not really. “Oh?” He hesitates, and then grimaces, needing to ask. “And? How do you… feel about that?”

Naruto shrugs. “I don’t know? I mean…” He blushes, deeply, averting his gaze. “I was in sage mode then as well, you know. Before. For a while. These… things kind of float into my brain then.”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows. “And…?”

Naruto’s voice is a whisper. “I… compared to you…” He swallows, his voice rough. “I think I’m a safe option for her, you know?”

Kakashi snorts, shooting him a look, silently concurring, while also willing his instant need down. “That is very astute.”

Naruto ducks his head, tone vaguely apologetic, though not aimed at Kakashi. “I feel kinda bad for her.”

Kakashi inhales deeply. “She will find her way.”

The flame flickers and Kakashi sighs, reaching out to clasp Naruto’s shoulder. “Let’s return.”

And Naruto smiles at him, softly, full of feeling. “Yes, Sensei.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Guy finds him, three days later. 

Tells him he’s heard.

 

Three days that had been filled with meetings for Kakashi, and audiences with the daimyo.

And fights, with the daimyo, and Ibiki and the council.

Kakashi knows now for a fact, that if Tsunade’s instructions hadn’t been so clear, and his own position not so strong because of it… Naruto would  have been apprehended. 

For his own good, of course. 

 

Kakashi scoffs, hands clenching on the railing. 

Feeling emotionally exhausted. 

 

Guy takes one look at him, and then challenges him to a race through the remains of Konoha. 

Up the heads. 

To celebrate the irresistibility of our youth. 

 

Kakashi grunts, sincerely doubting his youth is anything to find irresistible. 

Nor anything else right now. 

 

But the race feels good.

Kakashi can let all the frustration and stress out, and Guy letting him win there on the top, and Lee being there with a bouquet… is just amazing.

 

 

Kakashi stands there, panting, hands on his knees, shooting a look up at Guy, who grins at him, silent for once, and then he cannot help himself, he envelops Guy in a bear hug, almost getting crushed in return.

 

He shakes his head, hearing Lee cry and he tightens his arms, silently, in thanks.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Konohamaru is still dragging that long blue scarf around, though the end of it seems to be quite frayed by now. Kakashi frowns over his bowl of rice with vegetables, wondering how often the scarf has been replaced already. 

He lifts his hand, just as Konohamaru runs by. “Yo.”

Konohamaru skids to a halt, panting, his friends Udon and Muegi closing in, sniffing and also panting. 

Kakashi gives them an eye smile, but addresses Konohamaru. “I heard you were able to defeat a Pain?”

Konohamaru beams at him. “Yes, Rokudaime-sama, I managed to create the rasengan and trick the one that tried to retrieve information from Ebisu-san.”

Kakashi blushes, and then waves at him, trying to ignore all the looks by the people around the open tent serving as mess hall. “No, not Rokudaime, Konohamaru. I’m not Hokage. Just… stand-in.” A stand-in with a headache from all the shitty discussions already.

Konohamaru blinks, and tilts his head, and then grins broadly. “Naruto says you’re Hokage while baa-chan is still sick, and that you have been Kaukage already anyways, so I think the title is correct?”

There’s a murmur now, and whispers, and Kakashi grimaces, trying to ignore it. “I’ve never been named Kaukage officially, so it really is not appropriate.”

Konohamaru crosses his arms, with a pout. “But Naruto said you were the one that is supposed to be Hokage after her.”

Kakashi blinks, and then carefully puts his bowl away, grimacing when he feels the weight of dozens of eyes, now listening rather intently. 

He clears his throat. “Be that as it may, the title is something that is given when it becomes official… and it is not.”

Konohamaru waggles his eyebrows. “But you’re not saying it won’t be.”

Kakashi glowers at him. 

Muegi squeals. “Oh, that is so cool.”

Udon sniffs. “Absolutely cool.”

Kakashi groans softly, hearing the whispers start up again.

 

A hand lands on his shoulder, squeezing softly. “But it is cool, Kakashi. Better get used to it.”

Konohamaru’s cry rings out, just as Kakashi looks up to her. “Aunt Kurenai!”

Kurenai chuckles, bending down to receive Konohamaru in a big hug, who throws himself at her, holding fast. “Kurenai, I’ve killed a Pain with a rasengan.”

Kurenai draws back a bit, her big red eyes surprised and wistful, shifting to look at the destruction that was Konoha for a moment. “I see. I am very proud of you.” She looks back at Kakashi, who has bent down to caress Mirai’s little cheek in the carrier, and who is just straightening back up. “Quite the changed landscape.”

He quirks an eyebrow, watches her hug Konohamaru tightly for a moment before releasing him. 

He swallows. “Yes. We’re lucky the outer districts are still standing.”

She nods, and then sends Konohamaru and his friends off with a nod, and a grinned: “Later.” Konohamaru waves and Kurenai hesitates, and watches them run off, before seating herself next to Kakashi, looking around at the people watching them. And who are hastily getting back to their previous activities under her gaze. 

Her tone is soft. “It’s a miracle that everybody is alive.”

He nods. “Yes.” He looks after the kids, a bit wistfully. “It’s good that they take it so well…”

She shoots him a look, eye flitting back to Mirai and then back to him. Her tone is very low, only for him. “A chance you didn’t want to take with us…” Her head tilts to where Konohamaru has run off to. “But with him you did?”

Kakashi grimaces, and tilts his head, matching her tone. “I knew nothing about their attack. Just a gut feeling. Iruka said he’d take the kids to safety at the first sign of danger.” He hesitates. “Which he did.” He spreads his arms. “But, you know, Konohamaru…”

She rolls her eyes, relaxing a bit. “Yeah, I know.”

Kakashi leans in, almost whispering now. “Instead of going to the bunkers with the others, he went to Naruto’s apartment and saved his stuff.”

Kurenai blinks, and then snorts. “Oh, this boy.” She sniffs, grinning for a moment, proudly. “Such a good soul…”

Kakashi hums, with a nod. “He’s been sometimes living with you, hasn’t he?”

Kurenai nods. “Yes, and… while it’s been a bit difficult at the beginning, it’s shaping up wonderfully.” She smiles, looking back at Mirai, who has discovered her toes and is gnawing on that now. “In time, he will become a wonderful big brother.”

Kakashi blinks, and then sniffs, surprised by the sudden bout of emotions her words elicit. “You’re going to adopt him?”

She nods, and then smiles, widely. “Yes, I mean, he has been alone long enough already.” She shoots him a look. “You know best how hard it is to be alone.”

He sniffs and nods, reaching out to clasp her hand for a long moment. “Thank you.”

She inhales, and squeezes his hand, and then sighs. “The weeks with Sora have been wonderful, but I missed being here… I’ll go by the cemetery now.” There’s a bittersweet smile on her lips. “Light him a cigarette.”

Kakashi smiles, but then swallows, voice even lower, careful. “There has been some damage there, too. I’m not sure how much of it already been cleared away.”

She blinks at him. “There as well?”

Kakashi nods, and then gives her a deliberate, fake eye-smile, praying she’ll buy it. “Don’t worry about it.”

She narrows her eyes, and opens her mouth, but is interrupted by an Anbu arriving, kneeling in front of him. 

The masked head tilts. “Kakashi-sama. The daimyo has requested your presence.”

Kakashi nods, and the Anbu is gone again, and he sighs, deeply, tone dry. “At least they don’t call me Rokudaime.”

Kurenai hums, and then stands up, reaching for the carrier, tone sly. “Not yet.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto finds him, eventually, sitting high up on Minato’s stone head, the half moon hidden by clouds. 

He settles next to Kakashi, feet dangling down and they are silent for long minutes, looking out over the plane that used to be Konoha.

With the few houses left at the sides, and the few construction sites, where people have cleared the rubble away to rebuild already. 

 

Naruto sniffs. “This is my doing.”

Kakashi blinks, tilting his head. “So I heard.” He can hear Ibiki’s heated voice for a moment, feel Shikaku’s gaze. ‘You were dead then already, Kakashi, but the fox simply flattened everything to the ground. It destroyed the village center, and then tore through our training grounds and outskirts, destroyed the crops. Pain did not destroy Konoha… the bijou did. It’s dangerous.’ 

He sighs, through his nose. “You’re not responsible for this.”

Naruto looks at him, tone vaguely amused. “Yes, I am.” He presses his hand to his stomach for a moment, over the seal. “And I used that energy. Willingly.”

Kakashi frowns, shooting him a look. “Were you aware?”

Naruto weighs his head. “At times…” He frowns, and pulls a face. “The rage came in intervals.” He swallows, tone glum. “I… was in sage mode when I arrived, as I said, I knew you were dead.” He sniffs. “Like so many others.” He laughs, once, bitterly, pressing a fist to his chest. “It tore through me, but I didn’t have time to think, you know, no time to… feel.” He sniffs again, shaking his head once. “I defeated one after the other, it worked as intended, as we had planned… and then…”

Kakashi turns just slightly, pulling a leg up to look at Naruto. “What happened then.”

Naruto grimaces. “Then he pinned me down.”

Kakashi frowns, trying to decipher Naruto’s expression. “He pinned you down?”

Naruto nods, raising his hand to point at the various places. “Yes, you know, with those black rods.” He sniffs. “It hurt of course, but what was worse was, that… I had time to think. To feel.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a moment, hearing Naruto continue, hearing the pain in Naruto’s voice. “I mean, I knew already that you and so many others were dead, right. But I hadn’t really…”

Kakashi nods, tone gravelly. “Acknowledged it.”

Naruto breathes the word, shooting him a look. “Yes.”

Kakashi tilts his head. “And you became furious?”

Naruto cackles, but it is humorless, painful. “No, not yet. I… almost lost hope there.” He swallows. “Gave up.”

Kakashi blinks. And looks away, the weight of Naruto’s gaze heavy. “But… you said you sensed the pull, but if I was dead already…”

Naruto snorts. “Oh, that. Yeah, well, I stormed into Nagato’s hiding place later, in sage mode, but I turned it off when I saw that he was…” He shakes his head. “Nagato was simply in pain. Terrible pain.” He grimaces. “I couldn’t hurt him.” He exhales shudderingly, and then shrugs. “When he started that jutsu and Konan tried to stop him I wanted to know what the jutsu did of course, and so I turned sage mode back on for a moment.” His eyes find Kakashi’s. “And I knew.”

“Ah.” Kakashi swallows, looking away again. He fidgets, trying to alleviate the sudden intensity between them. “So what made the fox rage?”

 

Naruto is silent for a long moment, looking out over the desolation.

Eventually he sighs. “I told you, she told me she loved me. And then Pain took her out. I thought he’d killed her.”

Kakashi tries not to feel too much. “You raged for her.”

Naruto blinks, the wind playing with his hair. “No.”

Kakashi frowns. “No?”

Naruto shakes his head, very slowly. “No, though that is an aspect of it, of course, she’s my friend.” He blinks, very slowly. “But when she said that, I kind of zoned out, while watching. I… realized that Pain had killed the ones I love. One of the ones I…” He breaks off, and Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, hearing Naruto draw a deep breath. His voice sounds faraway. “When he used the last rod on her it was simply that one thing too much.” He clicks his tongue. “I thought I would never know. Any of it.” He laughs, just gently. “And I raged.”

Kakashi locks his eyes with Naruto’s, with an effort. 

Naruto’s voice is a whisper. “And then it raged.”

 

They stare at each other, for a long moment.

Kakashi finally speaks, not recognizing his own voice. “That is why you tried to force the issue, isn’t it. Up there? At the clearing?” He swallows, his voice raw. “You didn’t want to…”

Naruto hums, blushing a bit. “I didn’t want to risk not knowing again, yes.”

Kakashi exhales, softly. “And now you do.”

Naruto’s blush deepens, and he averts his gaze again. “Some of it, at least.”

Kakashi sniffs, quirking an eyebrow. Indeed.

 

He reaches over after a while, trails his finger down the place Naruto indicated earlier. “Is this a new jumpsuit?” 

Naruto grins, and shrugs, with a nod. “Yeah, well, I like the design. I always have a spare one.” He snorts. “Or I always did, but yes, this one was a spare one that Konohamaru saved with my other stuff.” He sniffs. “Guess I’ll have to find a place that sells them outside Konoha.”

Kakashi hums. “Did the fox heal you?”

Naruto looks at him, and frowns, and then nods, with a sigh. “Yes. Though…”

Kakashi frowns. “Though?”

Naruto looks away and fidgets, and then looks back at him, his expression sad. “Baa-chan’s necklace broke… at some point during the rampage.”

Kakashi blinks, trying to follow. “I’m sure she’ll be able to understand that.”

Naruto grimaces, looking down and playing a bit with his own fingers. “I guess.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes at him. “Naruto, what is it?”

Naruto exhales, and then stares at him. “Well, Sensei… when she gave it to me, she told me that it contained some of the Shodai’s essence.”

Kakashi blinks, remembering a similar comment by her. “And, so?”

Naruto’s eyes are huge and dark in the dim light. “Well, when the necklace broke, there was an influx of energy and that energy… I think it helped me get the fox back under control later.” He hesitates. “At least just as much as the other thing did.”

Kakashi stares at him, his mind racing. An influx of energy? Of Hashirama’s chakra? His cells? And another thing? Can it… be? 

His throat is dry. “What other thing?”

 

Naruto opens his mouth, but hesitates eyes flitting to the air being displaced by an Anbu on the other side of Kakashi.

Kakashi grimaces, before turning his head, tone a bit gruff. Dammit. “Yes?”

The Anbu shifts his stance. “Yamato-san has returned witch Anko and Sai.”

Kakashi nods, and then stands, with a sigh. “Thank you. I’ll be there momentarily.”

The Anbu nods and is gone, and Kakashi rolls his shoulders, before looking down at Naruto. “Still want to become Hokage?”

Naruto grins. “Absolutely.”

Kakashi grunts, tone very dry. “I’ll remind you.”

Naruto snickers, but sobers, his eyes full of soul and intensity. “I’ll hold you to it.” He hesitates, and then says, carefully: “Talk to you later… Kakashi.”

Kakashi swallows, and then nods, once. “Promise.”

 

He jumps off, heart beating in his throat, trying to decipher why he feels like he agreed to much more just now, than just bugging someone a few years down the road.

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 33: Sweet dreams are made of this

Notes:

Dear readers, this is the point where I veer off of canon in a… major way.
I want to do this thing with Naruto and Sasuke properly - and fairly for them both (all), and for that I felt it best to branch off here. Which brings its own set of repercussions, yes.
But the pull between them is simply too strong, as not to address it properly.
And it is too important, for Naruto’s development, imho, it cannot be ignored.
And… let me just say - it opens a lot of possibilities, too, later :))

This is also where some of the seemingly smaller changes I made in regards to Sasuke (and Itachi) come into play… The characterizations of Sasuke and a few others DIFFER (a bit) from what they would be if events happened like they did in canon… with the changes I’ve made, and the implications/repercussions of these changes the impact of them is different, so I’m going to reflect that in their behaviors, too.
(When I was just writing the war arc there was this post also, which is pretty along the lines of what I think, too.)

ALSO (quick personal note): the pandemic postponed a lot of events, and so a lot of the weddings, and parties etc are happening now/soon - despite everything, or, maybe IN spite of everything. You probably noticed that I posted a bit early today - that’s because I’m on a bachelorette party^^. And, next week, I’m away with my extended family. I will therefore post a day early next week.
For all the upcoming events I will -try- to post early. If I cannot, it might be a day late, but I will try to keep the basic weekly rhythm. Just as a heads-up.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

“I am coming with.”

Kakashi grunts, pulling at the strap of his rolled up futon mat. “No.”

Naruto steps up to him, arms crossed, still in bandages courtesy of Sai, who bandaged Naruto when he’d decided to let himself get beat up by the Lightning ninjas in order to gain information. “Yes.”

Kakashi exhales, with a sigh. “It’s a boring conference.”

Naruto narrows his eyes. “I read the scroll.” He smirks. “And the ninjas from the Land of Lightning confirmed the intel.”

Kakashi freezes for a split second, not knowing whether to be angry or amused, remembering his discussion with Shizune. “You read a confidential messenger scroll?”

Naruto fidgets a bit, but holds his ground. “You kept moving it out of my line of sight, so I figured it must be important and connected.”

Kakashi grimaces, shooting him a skunk eye, and then sighs, dramatically. “What happened to the cute little genins I could trick into believing anything?”

Naruto grins, with his nose scrunched. “You thought we were cute?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, and then sighs again, deeply. “So what do you want to do at the conference?” He shares a look with Tenzou, who is watching the two of them intently, and obviously amused. “I mean, Sasuke tried to abduct the Land of Lightning’s jinchuriki, but this is a conference?”

Naruto’s expression turns stubborn. “I want to ask the Raikage for Sasuke’s life.”

Kakashi straightens up, with a sigh. “I see.” I might have known.

Naruto glowers at him. “I know the laws. I heard the others. But you cannot tell me that sparing Hyuuga Hiashi’s life back then has not been good. Or that Sasuke has been evil right from the start.” Naruto hesitates, and then presses the words out. “I don’t know what happened there with Orochimaru, and why he now chose to help this… Tobi, but I need to…” He swallows, falling silent. 

Kakashi blinks, sharing another look with Tenzou.

Whose eyes crinkle, just a bit. 

Kakashi sighs. Again. “Fine. Get your stuff. Quietly.”

 

Naruto grins, and is gone, and Kakashi sighs to himself. Pushover.

Tenzou grins at him, openly now. 

Kakashi narrows his eyes, tone gruff. “What.”

Tenzou blinks, innocently. “Nothing, Senpai.”

Kakashi grunts. “You’re as bad as he is.”

Tenzou laughs gently, under his breath. And then he shakes his head, his tone a bit wistful, while he finishes packing his backpack. “I’m just glad that we’re here, now, all alive, to be honest.” He swallows. “Yugao and Aiko were at the shelters when the fox raged, while I…” He trails off, hesitating, and then shooting Kakashi a look. “When the sign for eight and then for nine tails showed up in my palm…” He swallows. “I was terrified.”

Kakashi blinks, suddenly vaguely glad he had been dead then, already. He clears his throat. “I can imagine.”

Tenzou shoots a look at the tent’s entrance. “But he didn’t rage without goal, he went after Pain only… the destruction was simply his power, but it was not aimed at Konoha, not really. Otherwise the shelters would have been destroyed, too.”

Kakashi nods, lowering his voice. “Apparently, there were two factors helping with the control.” He looks up at Tenzou. “One was the Godaime’s necklace. It broke, but apparently the essence spilt over.”

Tenzou frowns. “And?”

Kakashi grimaces. “We were interrupted before he could tell me. We should try to talk about it on the trip.”

Tenzou nods, pulling the straps tight. “Good idea.” He hesitates. “Senpai, regarding what we found… all these white human-like creatures…”

Kakashi grimaces. “I know. It’s an army.”

Tenzou shoots him a look. “What would they want an army for?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “And… possibly even worse… why did they disturb some of the graves while we were busy elsewhere?”

There is a sound outside, and Kakashi falls silent, sharing another look with Tenzou, who grimaces.

 

Naruto rushes in, cheeks flushed, still shoving his blanket into his backpack. “Ready.”

Tenzou quirks an eyebrow, but shoulders his backpack, shooting a look at Kakashi. 

Who shakes his head, once, with a slightly forced smile. “Alright then. Let’s go.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The wind is howling outside the tent’s thin linen walls, the shudders as it tears on the cloth impressive. 

Naruto eyes the fluttering cloth, a bit warily. 

Kakashi smirks to himself, putting a tin can filled with snow onto the fire. “Don’t worry. The cloth is reinforced. It won’t rip, we’re safe to sleep here.” He shoots a look at Tenzou, who smirks back. “Sensei Yamato and I have some experience in storms in these tents.”

Naruto huddles close to the fire, shuddering. “Ugh, I hate the cold.” He looks up. “Did you go onto many missions together?”

Kakashi weighs his head, settling on a vague: “Some.”

Naruto blinks, and then looks at Tenzou. “Sensei, you always call Sensei Kakashi Senpai…”

Tenzou shrugs, with a sidelong glance. “Well, he is?”

Naruto hums. “How old were you when you went onto missions together?”

Kakashi blinks, and then chuckles. “Oh, I…” He frowns, shooting a look at Tenzou. “How old were we?”

Tenzou’s tone is dry. “Too young.”

Kakashi snorts, but then sighs, pulling a face. “Ah… I think we were a team when I was fifteen, or sixteen, right… and then for a few years.”

Tenzou nods. “Something along these lines, yes. So that would make me… ten.”

Naruto stares at them. “You were Anbu at sixteen?” His gaze flickers to Tenzou, voice rising in pitch. “And you at ten???“

Kakashi clears his throat, sharing a look with Tenzou, but shrugs, making his voice soft. “I became an Anbu at thirteen. Sensei Yamato is a special case… due to his skills.”

Naruto blinks, echoing, astonishment clear in his voice. “So young.”

Kakashi grimaces, but shrugs, reaching for the cups to prepare the tea. “It was a different time.”

 

Naruto is silent for a long moment. But then he inhales, deeply, something in his voice. “Who made you Anbu?”

Kakashi blinks, hesitating, before pouring the now boiling water into the cups. “Ahhh, the Yondaime did.” He swallows, offering Naruto a cup.

Naruto takes it, gratefully, clasping it to warm himself. He stares at the steam rising for a long moment, and then blinks up at Kakashi, voice firm. “So, my father called you into the Anbu?”

Kakashi jerks a bit, hissing when the hot water spills, but locks his gaze with Naruto’s, immediately. His voice is breathless, shivering with… he cannot name the emotions, a myriad of feelings rushing through him. “You know?”

He can sense Tenzou holding his breath.

Slowly, a small, happy and yet shy smile breaks out on Naruto’s face, and he nods, once, with a sniff. “Yeah, I… punched him into the stomach.”

Tenzou snorts, surprised, while Kakashi just stares. He opens his mouth to answer, to ask, but suddenly his throat closes off, and he retches, the taste of chocolate overpowering for a long moment… and then gone.

 

Kakashi gasps, staring into space, not knowing why he knows, but he does indeed know that the seal is gone, the seal preventing him from telling the truth to Naruto, the truth about Naruto’s heritage, and the attack, and the seal, goddammit, and Kakashi gasps a laugh, vaguely hearing both Naruto and Tenzou talking to him, trying to reach him, but they’re far away somehow, Kakashi’s whole mind fixed on this instance of time.

On what it means.

 

Oh god.

 

 

He heaves a breath, and then raises his gaze, the sharingan open behind the hitai-ate, staring into space, captured by wide blue.

Naruto and Tenzou both hover next to him now, on each side, hands reached out. 

Staring at him, silently now. 

Obviously sensing, something.

Waiting.

 

Kakashi sniffs, and then swallows, his throat clicking. His voice is almost inaudible. “It’s gone.”

Naruto frowns. 

Tenzou throws his head back with a deep groan. “Oh thank god.”

Naruto blinks at him, and then something vaguely annoyed enters his features. “I don’t understand.”

Kakashi raises a shaking hand, clasping his shoulder for a long moment. 

He shakes his head once, voice raw. “I know. And… we won’t discuss everything now…” He raises his eyebrows, tries to catch Naruto’s stubborn gaze, emphasizing heavily. “But now we can.”

Naruto’s gaze softens, and then vulnerability bleeds into his expression. “We can?”

Kakashi nods, feeling like crying suddenly. “Yes.” He swallows. “When we’re back, we’ll sit down and talk, okay?”

Naruto nods, jerkily, a broad smile spreading. “Okay.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, breathes once, deeply. “Alright.” He sniffs, and then cackles, once. “So. You punched Minato into the stomach? Really? And… how? I mean…” He trails off, watching the smile in Naruto’s voice change to a displayed, big, shit-eating grin.

Naruto ducks his head. “Yeah, well, apparently he put a chakra imprint into my seal, to help at a time of need? And so it activated when the fox had me almost release the final seal during the fight… and we talked.” He grimaces. “I was overwhelmed, and pissed, and happy, and… and I punched him, yelling at him how he could have possibly have done this… to me.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, and then shares a look with Tenzou. “Yeah, I remember that feeling.”

Naruto stares at him, a weird undertone to his voice. “When did you first meet me? There at the river?”

Kakashi shakes his head, slowly, with a grimace. “No… I…” He stares down into the cup for a long moment, before meeting Naruto’s gaze again. “I first laid eyes on you when you were mere minutes old. Your parents had just died.” Had just sacrificed themselves. He sighs. And our bond… made itself known. 

Naruto blinks. “You weren’t with them?”

Kakashi shakes his head, slowly. “No. I had been given the day off.” He snorts. “I rushed back, but…”

Silence for a moment, as abject pain runs through them both.

 

Naruto stares at him, his voice sounds faraway. Seemingly changing the subject. “I remember Loran, too.”

Kakashi’s eyes snap up. Stares at Naruto. Who blushes, deeply.

Tenzou clears his throat. “Loran?” He frowns, when they both look at him. “That desert ruin?”

Kakashi blinks, and then shares a look with Naruto, before looking back at Tenzou. “You don’t remember?”

Tenzou tilts his head. “…No?”

Kakashi blinks, and then looks back at Naruto. “When did you remember?” What do you remember?

Naruto grimaces, scratching his head. “Ahhh, the other day. When you had to leave. I…” He hesitates, blushing. “I remembered talking to you about the spiky hair and… then suddenly there was this moment of time where I couldn’t, like, breathe, and then there was this memory of you with your hair different still, and so young, and without the scar and the eye, and Sensei Yamato bonked you over the head and said he’d waited so long for that, and you were staring at me so weirdly, while pretending not to, and he was there, and I mean, I knew now who he was, right, and it, like opened the door to the whole memory, because, you know, I realized back then, too, I mean, we shared and fused our rasengans, and he looked so much like me, and he looked at me with that hopeful gaze, and I couldn’t… I couldn’t….” He trails off, and there’s tears now, running down his face. “I met my Dad, in real, and I didn’t know him! And I met you, and he made me forget all about it… it’s so unfair.” He grimaces, his voice heated now. “Imagine how different my life could have been, if…” He trails off.

Kakashi blinks, and then continues, gently. “If you’d known?” He gently squeezes Naruto’s shoulder. “But Naruto, that’s only a few months back now.” He sniffs. “For you at least.”

Naruto stares at him. “Right.” He swallows. “For you…”

Kakashi clears his throat, ignoring Tenzou’s interested gaze. “Ah, forget it.” He inhales, deeply. “Besides, your father usually knew what he was doing.”

Naruto blinks, slowly. “He was your commanding officer, back then.”

Kakashi exhales, and then smiles, softly. “He was my Sensei, too.”

 

Sudden silence, as Naruto stares at him, for so long Kakashi feels a need to fidget.

Naruto’s voice is very low. “And there was a seal that prevented you from telling me?”

Kakashi nods, with a sigh. “Yes.” He grimaces. “Remember when I passed out at the hospital?” Naruto nods, and Kakashi continues. “That was when I wanted to tell you, so much actually, that the seal made me pass out.”

Naruto blinks, looking over at Tenzou for a moment. “And you do not remember, Sensei Yamato?”

Tenzou shakes his head, slowly. “No…” He snorts and then quirks an eyebrow. “And I really would love to remember bonking Kakashi over the head.”

Naruto giggles, and it’s Kakashi’s turn to snort. 

He quirks an eyebrow, tone light. “You can do so later?” He mock glowers. “Or… try.”

Naruto snorts and then laughs, loudly, grinning at them both. 

Kakashi grins back at him, and then sobers, slowly, his voice soft. “What else did you discuss with Minato? I mean… you didn’t just punch him, right?”

Naruto laughs, shaking his head. He takes a sip of his tea. “No. He… told me that he sealed half of the fox’ chakra in me because he hoped I would be able to defend the village from Tobi… and that he thinks that Tobi might be someone else.”

Kakashi blinks. He quirks an eyebrow. “Uchiha Madara.” Though ‘Tobi’ isn’t Madara… just pretends to be. But I have an inkling…

Two sets of eyes snap to his. 

Naruto exclaims, loudly. “You knew?”

Kakashi feels Tenzou shift a bit closer. He sighs softly, settling on a vague: “There were indications.” Naruto stares at him. Kakashi raises his chin, prompting softly. “Anything else?”

Naruto shakes his head, and then ducks his head. His voice is carried on a smile. “Only that he believes in me.”

Kakashi hums, with a smile. And then says, drily. “He better.”

Tenzou cackles, under his breath. 

Naruto snickers, with a shrug of his shoulders, sobering slowly. “He said he has watched me through my mind, and that he knows I will be able to find a way.”

Kakashi blinks, and then refuses to share a look with Tenzou. He watched through your mind? 

A shiver of dread runs through him. Oh god, did Minato see the kiss? See me cave? 

His voice is definitely more pressed than he would have liked. “When exactly did you have that chakra vision with him?”

Naruto blinks at him, with a frown, and then a slow grin spreads, and Kakashi wants to smack him, knowing he knows why Kakashi is so weird, but Naruto only hums, eyes sparkling. 

Voice carrying a deliberate pout. “Before I found Nagato.”

Kakashi clears his throat. “Ah.” Oh, thank goodness.

He can feel Tenzou look at him, a bit weirdly.

 

There is a pause, and then Tenzou asks, a bit haltingly. “So. What happens now?”

Kakashi exhales, and then shrugs. “Now we sleep. Then we’ll go and try to convince the Raikage and then to that conference.” He looks at Tenzou, and then back at Naruto. “Then we’ll return home… and talk.”

Naruto blinks, and takes another sip of his tea. 

He nods, with a long exhale. “Alright.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Kakashi stares at the moving tent walls, shifting almost hypnotically still.

His mind is empty, filled to the brim with hope and anticipation, so much in fact, that he cannot feel it, his stomach fluttering. 

Tenzou and Naruto are both asleep, Naruto’s hand once more flung onto his futon, and Kakashi inhales, deeply, smiling at the smell, and then allows himself to imagine, to dream, for once.

He falls asleep to his mind turning the memory of the kiss into sweet, sweet dreams, full of life and hope and summer.

 

And he feels warm, so warm.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The Raikage glowers at Naruto, kind enough to hear him despite being tracked down and stopped on the road… but also indignant enough to ignore Naruto’s request, almost immediately.

 

Kakashi watches Naruto kneel in the snow, laying prone in a full-body obeisance and he grimaces, swallowing the bile down. Knowing how frustrated Naruto must feel right now.

His voice is as firm as he can make it, the words meaning much more than just the current situation. “Naruto. Raise your head.”

Naruto sniffs, and then sits up, slowly, raising his head to look at him. 

And Kakashi clicks his tongue, unable to not try to bring the light back into those flat, sad eyes: “We’ll find a way.”

 

He ignores Tenzou’s look.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

The inn they stop at the following night is simple, but warm, and Naruto grunts in relief when they enter it, greedily slurping down the simple but delicious meal they are served for dinner. 

He falls asleep as soon as they’ve unrolled the futons, snoring happily away.

 

Kakashi shakes his head, with a grin, that sobers again immediately. The encounter with the Raikage must have been very emotionally taxing for him. He sighs.

Tenzou shoots him a look, tone quiet. “Do you think he has recognized the bond yet, Senpai?”

Kakashi pauses, and then grimaces, with a wry smile, tone low but firm. “No.”

Tenzou quirks an eyebrow, settling on his own futon in lotus seat. “No?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No… if he had…” He snorts, half amused, half annoyed. “If he had I’d be done for.”

Tenzou frowns. “Done for?”

Kakashi colors, a bit, clearing his throat. “Yeah, well, you know how Naruto is, right? If he decided to go after me…”, he is beet red now, he can feel it, “if he decided to truly, really go after me…” I wouldn’t stand a chance.

Tenzou blinks. “Right.” And then he smirks, with a sidelong glance. “So he has tried already?”

Kakashi glowers at him, willing his ears to stop burning, tone gruff. “None of your business.”

Tenzou laughs softly, under his breath, the big, weird, dark eyes sparkling. “That good, huh.”

Kakashi groans, and then lies down on his own futon. “Shut up, Tenzou.”

Tenzou clicks his tongue, watching him. “Think you can sleep already, Senpai?”

Kakashi presses his lips together, and then sighs, sitting back up. Glaring at Tenzou. “No.”

Tenzou winks at him, with a smirk. “Come on. Lets go down and have a drink. It’s still early.”

Kakashi grunts, shoots a look at Naruto, who is just rolling over to fling his limbs out half over Kakashi’s futon and Kakashi shakes his head, and then laughs, gently. “Just one though. We need to be fit for the conference tomorrow.”

Tenzou straightens up and holds out his hand. “Of course.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Midway through the second sip, there’s pressure in his eye.

His left eye.

 

Time slows to a crawl.

 

 

Kakashi can see Tenzou’s eyes widen in alarm as Kakashi, in a display of utmost rarity, simply lets the glass just drop to the table and kicks it away, pushes up to vault over it and towards the doorway of the small dining hall in one swift, fluid motion.

 

And Kakashi cannot breathe.

The abject terror of knowing Obito is here, now, NEAR…

 

There is a voice that whispers. 

What if I cannot protect him?

 

He cannot think, the door to the outside flying open under his hand as if in slow motion. 

 

There is an explosion, as part of Naruto’s room is blown out, by a rasengan.

 

Tenzou reacts immediately, jumping up and into it, his wood release binding Obito and raising a thick grid wall between Naruto and him.

Kakashi flashes up and stares at Obito, hovering behind him, chidori chirping in his hand.

Realizing that Obito is making no move to disappear. 

Or attack.

 

He clenches his jaw, the words dark. “We won’t let you get your hands on Naruto that easily, O…” He hesitates, and then continues with the name that Naruto expects to hear, knowing he is taunting Obito with it. And hiding still that he knows who really is behind the mask. He refuses to feel guilty. “Uchiha Madara.”

The mask tilts, Obito foregoing the Tobi persona once more, his tone dry. “No attacks work against Uchiha Madara.”

Kakashi narrows his eye, only the sharingan open right now, the world in stark, blinding focus. Why did you tell me that, Obito? Or was it just a frustrated comment? 

He blinks, the world cloudy for a split second. Kakashi frowns.

Tenzou interjects, his dark eyes calm. “But I know it is necessary for you to manifest physically in order to capture Naruto.”

Obito turns his head and the mask towards him, and then to Naruto, Obito’s voice shivering with something Kakashi cannot name. “Naruto… you have aroused my curiosity.”

Kakashi tilts his head. Really… Is that why you haven’t abducted him yet yourself? Or… is it something else. He swallows. If you’d really wanted to… I couldn’t have stopped you right now. He’d be gone already. He swallows again, trying to ignore the churning terror in his heart.

Naruto yells. “What do you intend to do with Sasuke?” Demanding. “Tell me about Sasuke!!”

There is a small shift of the mask, Obito’s voice vaguely amused. “Sasuke, huh?”

Kakashi grimaces. Great. Now he’s focusing on that again. Dammit.

Obito huffs a laugh. “Very well, I’ll tell you. About the man whose hatred of the ninja world runs through his bones to his very core.” There is a slight pause. “Sasuke’s story cannot be heard without hearing about Itachi… so first hear about Itachi’s story.”

 

Kakashi blinks, with a frown, listening to Obito tell the truth… more or less of course. 

Naruto denies everything, yelling, which was to be expected, and Tenzou… Tenzou is horrified. 

Kakashi blinks, shooting him a look. Wondering. Old friend, were you not there with me that night? Do you and Yugao not talk? He frowns again, grimacing. But then, denial is a powerful tool.

 

And sometimes leaving the past behind is the only way to heal.

 

I know.

 

There is glee in Obito’s voice now. “Itachi did it for Sasuke’s sake… and the Hidden Leaf Village.”

Kakashi blinks. And you. Do you also think you do it for Konoha? In the end? Is what you aim for so just… so good that it justifies these horrible means?

He clicks his tongue, digging deeper. “Knowing him, he would have returned to Konoha to carry on Itachi’s will then…” Come on, Obito. Give me a bit more.

Obito harrumphs. “You might have assumed you understood Sasuke true feelings… but you are badly mistaken.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. So his goals have changed? Why… He opens his mouth to ask, but Naruto is faster.

He hits the wooden beam once more. “Did you turn Sasuke into that?”

Obito’s reply is dry. “No. I didn’t.”

Naruto yells, with tears in his eyes. “It’s a lie!”

Kakashi inhales deeply, somehow knowing that Obito did not, in fact, lie in regards to this. Was it Orochimaru? Who turned Sasuke down the wrong path?

Obito’s voice is low now, dark, saturated with truth. “He chose vengeance.”

Kakashi frowns, staring at his head, the unruly hair that looks gray in places under chidori’s flickering light. Chose vengeance… Is that it? You chose vengeance and you cannot leave the path you’ve chosen anymore? 

Obito continues, seemingly reciting now, eyes fixed on Naruto, who has sunk to his knees behind the wooden bars. “Sasuke’s goal at this moment is to take revenge against Konoha for what they did to Itachi and the Uchiha.”

Kakashi narrows his eye, thoughts racing. But he knew that before. He knew it and he was working through it. If Orochimaru hadn’t abducted him, I am sure he would have found a way to deal. So why now… why say he wants to go to Konoha to destroy it now?

He blinks, looking down at Naruto, who has lowered his head, silent tears wrecking him.

Naruto’s voice sounds defeated. “How could this happen? How could he turn to revenge?”

Kakashi exhales softly. Yes, that is the question, isn’t it. He blinks, staring unseeing at the back of Obito’s head once more. Although… He lets chidori flare out, staring at Obito’s head. 

 

Oh. 

 

Obito shifts, just a bit, obviously irritated by him stopping the jutsu. 

And then the mask tilts forward again, Obito’s voice calm and almost gentle. “Naruto… you will probably fight Sasuke one day.” There is a soft sigh. “A battle that was predestined ages ago.”

Obito continues speaking, and Kakashi blinks, something clicking into place. You think they’re like Yin and Yang, too. You really think they are reincarnations of Rikkudo Sennin’s sons? Destined to clash? He remembers his own feelings in regards to Sasuke and Naruto, the feelings when they fought back then, at the Valley of the End. But why do you do that? If the bijou was really, truly necessary for you, you would have taken it already, but you haven’t… why go to such lengths to ensure they fight?

Obito cackles, harshly in response to Naruto’s obvious pain. “I’ll have Sasuke validate the existence of the Uchiha.”

Kakashi stares at him. Validate… I know of someone else who always fought to validate his clan, who clashed with someone who was his polar opposite, too… one whose name you choose to carry. Are you doing this in his name? Or… carry out his wishes?

Obito’s voice is heated, now, intense. “You think you can have Sasuke have a change of heart, like you did with Nagato?” He scoffs. “That’s just as selfish, Naruto.”

Kakashi tilts his head. And you fear it, don’t you. His ability to convince.

Naruto’s voice is filled with anger now. “Don’t liken yourself to Nagato.”

Kakashi can see Obito’s shoulder stiffen. He quirks an eyebrow. Interesting.

Obito hums, and then clicks his tongue. “You’re right.” He exhales. “Talking to you is meaningless.”

 

Kakashi chuckles, under his breath.

There is a pause, in which Kakashi knows, that Obito’s attention shifts to him.

Kakashi debates calling Obito out here and now, unmasking him, but… He leans forward instead, inhales deeply against Obito’s neck. 

Obito shivers. His voice is not quite stable. “Talking to you was quite fun.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, watching him swirl away. I’m sure. He smiles grimly. And I got under your fucking skin.

 

He exhales, shooting a look down, finding Tenzou looking at him, while Naruto’s head is still lowered. Kakashi shakes his head gently, indicating for Tenzou not to ask in regards to Kakashi’s weird action there, at the end, at least not now, hopping down to gently embrace Naruto as Tenzou lets the beams of wood retract.

Naruto sniffs, blinking up at him, silently.

Kakashi smiles softly, reaching up to brush a wisp of hair from his forehead.

He sighs. “We need to keep what we just learned about the Uchiha massacre to ourselves. At least for now.” He can feel Tenzou’s gaze, like a lead weight. He turns his head, meets Tenzou’s dark gaze. “It’s quite true.”

There is a pause, as his words sink in.

Naruto speaks first, his throat clicking, ire bleeding through. “So why do we need to keep it to ourselves?”

Kakashi sighs, and then scans the vicinity, with his sharingan, letting them see. He withdraws a bit, to turn to them both, sitting on his haunches. 

He shapes the words very carefully. “I think that…” He grimaces, tilting his head. Lowers his voice even more. “I think that Sasuke is looking for a loophole to return home. But he can’t without risking Itachi’s safety further.”

Tenzou lowers himself to his knees as well, sitting back. “You think… he fumbled on purpose?” He shoots a look at Naruto, who is listening, with wide eyes. “He deliberately failed his task of abducting the eight-tails?”

Kakashi hums, keeping a careful mental eye on the pressure in his left eye. “I think it was no coincidence that Sasuke took that doctor with him back then. That Itachi is now with him, and still alive. That the eight-tails abduction has failed. That Sasuke managed to kill Orochimaru so easily and still stayed with him for a while when he resurrected. I think he wanted to see if Orochimaru and Kabuto really were able to use the jutsus they were talking about… and I think…” He blinks, continuing the thought after a moment. “I think he thought Danzo would show up.” He grimaces. “When he didn’t, Sasuke decided to find Itachi, leaving Orochimaru and Kabuto behind. And ran straight into… Tobi’s trap.”

Naruto sniffs. “Tobi’s trap?”

Kakashi exhales, deeply. “Or Madara, or whatever. Madara, Tobi… he pulled Sasuke and Itachi out of our grip then, stopped us long enough for their fight to come to an end. And then he whisked them away. For some reason, Tobi wants him to fight you. It’s not only the bijous, it’s… he said something about predestined earlier. Destiny is a funny thing… “

He blinks, silently continuing the thought. And he wants to force it.

Naruto sniffs again, eyes wide on his, latching onto the only part that seems to matter to him. “You really think Sasuke wants to come home, Sensei?” He hesitates. "I dream of bringing him home.“

Kakashi frowns. I know. “I think he may not quite know how to.” He sighs, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose. “And he might still want to kill Danzo before he does so.”

Tenzou quirks an eyebrow, and he and Kakashi share a look. Yeah, I can’t blame him either.

Naruto pulls a face. “So we need to find Danzo.”

Kakashi coughs a laugh. “Well, the nin-ken and I have tried for years.” Naruto frowns at him, and Kakashi continues, with a small self-deprecating little smile. “It’s true. I lost his trail in Amegakure, where he indicated that he was in league with Orochimaru.” He swallows trying to suppress the accompanying feelings. “That was right before you and Sasuke clashed, back then.”

 

Naruto stares at him, with a deep frown. He bites his lower lip, tilting his head.

His voice is a bit insecure. “Isn’t Amegakure where Nagato was, creating and pretending to be Pain?”

Kakashi nods, with a sniff. “Yes, I even went there, once, after you left with Jiraiya, and I met Konan th…”

He stops, staring into space.

Something tickles at the back of his mind, inviting him to follow. 

 

Konan, who had put a bouquet of flowers onto Jiraiya’s memorial stone.

Konan, friend to Yahiko and Nagato.

Nagato, who had used the final jutsu with his weird purple eyes.

The weird purple eyes that were given to him, as a child, by a man with long, unruly hair and black eyes, that could shift to red. 

The purple eyes that supposedly only Madara possessed.

Madara, who should have been dead, long ago.

Who was said to be dead, after his fight with Hashirama.

 

Uchiha Madara, whose name was used by Obito. 

 

Obito, who’d said he’d been sent.

Obito, who can disappear, into thin air. Can apparently make others disappear, too.

Obito, who, in all likelihood, had picked up Danzo to make Kakashi lose the trail.

Obito, who was… is a part of the Akatsuki.

Their leader.

 

Orochimaru had been part of the Akatsuki, before Itachi had joined.

 

Kakashi holds his breath, trying to follow the thought. 

 

The snake had been a message alright, one meant to send me back. But it had been a hint, not an insult, because you had never intended to use Danzo, had you… you despise him, just like I do. You despise those that use the sharingan without permission. 

The sharingan, which belongs to the Uchiha only. 

Or those that receive them as a gift.

 

Kakashi blinks. That’s why Sasuke had to validate himself, hadn’t he. To get new eyes?

But Danzo… You still have Danzo, don’t you? Hidden away, somewhere… You picked him up, removed him from this plane of existence, and never let him out again. Why?

He frowns. What did Danzo do with the eyes he collected… that you didn’t like.

 

The eyes that could be collected…

 

The purple eyes.

 

That Nagato wore. 

 

 

“Sensei?”

Kakashi blinks, refocusing on Naruto with an effort. 

He clears his throat. “Did Konan say where she would take Nagato’s body?”

Naruto blinks, and then shakes his head, once. “No. She just said she would take both Nagato and Yahiko home.”

Kakashi blinks, and then raises his eyebrows. “I see.” Amegakure, or, better, east of it, I bet.

Naruto frowns. “Why do you ask?”

Kakashi shakes his head, slowly. “Doesn’t matter. We wouldn’t make it in time anyways.” Even if I could track her down… Obito can just go through interdimensional space. He grimaces. I cannot save her. Maybe it’s already too late.

He sniffs, shooting Yamato a look, letting the thought of saving Konan go, with an effort. “We need to get to the conference.” He looks at the big hole in the wall. “And… pay for repairs.”

Naruto ducks his head, mumbling. “Sorry.”

Kakashi shakes his head, reaches out to ruffle his hair. “Not your fault.” He looks at Tenzou. “Thank you for defending him so swiftly.”

Tenzou blinks, with a miniature incline of his head. “Anytime.” He hesitates, his voice low. “What do you expect will happen at the conference, Senpai?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, and quirks an eyebrow. “We’ll form an alliance. And…” He grimaces. “One way or another, Sasuke will be there.”

Naruto interjects, excitedly. “Sasuke? Why?”

Kakashi tilts his head, his tone almost light. “Because… Tobi will drop off Sasuke there.”

Tenzou and Naruto both stare at him, with wide eyes. 

Tenzou’s voice is careful. “Whyyy?”

Kakashi snorts, with a grim smile. “Because he still thinks Sasuke wants to attack Konoha… and what would be better than to kill the Hokage. Or all the kages.”

Naruto’s voice is laced with something Kakashi cannot place for a moment. Oh yes. Fear. For him. “What will happen if Sasuke doesn’t?”

Kakashi weighs his head, silently concurring with the trepidation. “Then Tobi will punish him… Sasuke cannot risk that, not yet. He still needs to keep Itachi safe, and he still wants Danzo. So he will… pretend to.”

Tenzou hisses. “Risky.”

Kakashi nods, grimly. “Yes.”

Naruto’s eyes are blue fire. “We have to stop him.”

Kakashi looks at him, at the way his mouth is set. 

The thought is bleak. I wonder what will happen then… when you meet again. Will what is between us matter still? Should I… find another way? He smirks, grimly, furious at himself. No. I cannot do that to you. Or him. I am not that petty.

Kakashi sighs, finally pulling his hitai-ate back down, and resigning himself to bring Sasuke home, for Naruto. Somehow. “No… not stop. If we do that at the conference there’s a high risk he‘ll get killed.” He clicks his tongue. “But… We’ll… aid and direct him.” Drive him off so we can engage him later. 

Tenzou breathes the words, while a dangerous little grin breaks out on Naruto’s face. “Oh boy.”

Kakashi waggles his eyebrows. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Mei flirts with him, whenever she can.

 

Kakashi is actually glad that Naruto isn’t there, waiting in the entrance halls to the big castle with Tenzou and Pakkun. Though… it might be debatable whether he would actually notice, now. Kakashi frowns, remembering how distracted Naruto had been when they’d arrived, all his senses fixed on trying to find Sasuke, by sheer will.

Glowering at the Raikage, when Ay had passed.

 

Which is why Kakashi has changed his mind more or less at the last moment, exchanging a look with Tenzou, has told Naruto to stay there. To guard the entrance and take everyone suspicious into custody.

Firmly. 

 

Mei chuckles next to him, leaning back, lounging deliberately and Kakashi catches a quick glance from Gaara, whose green eyes are watching interestedly, and yet boredly.

Kakashi blinks, refocusing on the Tsuchikage, whose nose seems to have grown even more since last time he saw him. But his temper and mind are as sharp as ever. 

 

They’re still very far from forming a common ground, or even an alliance, any alliance, despite the Akatsuki and the attacks on the jinchurikis, and Kakashi sighs softly, wondering how exactly he might bring them to forego the old squabbles.

Huh, that’s a good one. Squabbles. More like decades-long, carefully-nurtured, important-for-military-budgeting animosity.

He sighs, shooting a look at the Raikage, whose booming voice fills the room now. 

Still riled up over the attack on his chosen brother. 

Kakashi grimaces a bit. We would be just as upset, if they would have attacked our village to kill Naruto… he shoots a look at Gaara. The Wind has had a few troubling times already, since the loss of the one-tails. Only Gaara’s farsighted alliance with the Leaf has kept the power balance… for now. 

 

Mei twirls her red hair, while interjecting the Raikage Ay, coolly, but Kakashi tunes her out, knowing they’re only at the preliminaries, so to speak. Her aid Ao turns his head, shoots Kakashi a look - with his covered eye. 

Kakashi grins wryly to himself. Ah yes, another one with an eye they did not possess from birth. One of the reasons why the Hyuuga had that idiotic rule with the main and the off-branch family. He exhales, suddenly insanely glad Naruto yelled at Tsunade back then. Maybe we will see some real change there, in time. 

He turns his head to the Tsuchikage, who had just scoffed, in response to Mei. 

 

And then chakra tickles his senses, chakra he hasn’t felt in quite a while.

 

He can sense Gaara shift, obviously noticing as well, and Mei laughs under her breath, sharing a look with her bodyguard Chojuro. The Tsuchikage Onoki harrumphs and Ay falls silent, the sudden stillness of the room only emphasizing the glower by the kages and their bodyguards.

 

Kakashi sighs, raising his face to the ceiling. “Hello, Sasuke.”

There you are. 

 

 

 

Time to play.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Sasuke stares at him, hanging face-down from the ceiling, hand on his sword. His eyes are fixed on Kakashi, flitting over to the hat that Kakashi has deliberately not placed on the desk, making it clear he doesn’t expect to actually wear it.

Sasuke’s tone is biting. “Kakashi. Been roped into the boring stuff I see.”

Kakashi’s lips twitch, though he tries to keep his face expressionless. He clicks his tongue. “And you… Been roped into believing that Danzo would be here?” He tilts his head, tone almost soft, seeing Sasuke flinch. “What makes you think he would be here, for the Leaf, after we went after him?”

Sasuke blinks, and Kakashi tries to keep his face expressionless, feeling the small shifts of the powerful people in the room. So. Neither Orochimaru nor Obito told you that we did… and you obviously did not encounter Danzo yet. He exhales, a part of him feeling with Sasuke. And for him. You must feel mightily used right now.

He clears his throat, leaning back to cross his legs, hands clasped in his lap. “So, what now.”

Sasuke grimaces, grimly. “I’ll kill you.”

Another shift, as the kages and their aids scoot into a more comfortable position. 

Kakashi fights to stay relaxed. “Me? Or us.”

Sasuke drops down, onto the table in front of Kakashi, crouching on it with his hands on the edge, face mere inches from Kakashi’s now. His eyes are unfathomably deep, flat black. “You. You were there. You didn’t help him.”

Ah. So you have talked to Itachi. But Itachi has forgiven me… 

There’s a whisper of a murmur now, that runs through the room.

Kakashi sighs, softly, and then pastes an eye-smile on. “Take me to him, then. I’d like to talk to him.” Let’s not escalate this, hmm?

Another grimace flits over Sasuke’s face, there and gone again.

Kakashi exhales. I see. You can’t. You’re dependent on Obito right now, because he has Itachi.

He opens his mouth to respond, but Ay is faster.

His heated, booming voice filling the room. “You dared to attack the wrong jinchuriki, Uchiha.”

Sasuke’s eyes grow remote somehow, and Kakashi grimaces.

Sasuke pushes up and turns, ignoring Kakashi and Kakashi stares at his back and legs, wondering if he could actually restrain Sasuke, if he tried. But no, this is a taunt, not an opening. He sighs, picking at a non-existing fluff on his pants.

Mei shoots him a weird look, but looks up at Sasuke once more, as he speaks. “I believe the eight-tails was very much the correct one.”

Kakashi blinks, sorely tempted to snort. He clicks his tongue, easily drawing the attention. “And yet a futile attempt.” He hesitates, carefully and steely locking his gaze with Ay. “No permanent harm done.” Not yet.

Sasuke blinks, staring down at him.

Kakashi looks up at him, carefully shaping his words, knowing they sound like a threat to them… but like hope to Sasuke. “I won’t allow it that you capture them anymore… I will bring you back.”

Sasuke blinks, seemingly frozen to the spot.

 

Mei purses her lips. Drawls. “That’s right. You cannot escape us now.”

Kakashi grimaces softly, shooting her a look. Dammit. Don’t interfere now. 

Onoki harrumphs, picking up her cue. “Right. I’m tired of this.”

Ay stands up, shoving his chair back. “End of the road for you, you wannabe rogue.”

For the space of one heartbeat, his and Sasuke’s eyes meet. Kakashi grimaces.

 

There’s pressure in his eye.

 

And then all hell breaks lose, as Mei tries to drive Sasuke into a corner with her lava walls, making Kakashi get hastily out of the way, her aid Ao obviously transmitting Sasuke’s movements to her with his byakugan. Kakashi clenches his jaw. Who did he take it from again? Sasuke vaults back, destroying the walls with Amaterasu, his hand shaking on his eye for a moment afterwards. Kakashi sees the blood drop from it, grimacing in sympathy. 

Sasuke infuses his sword with lightning and Kakashi blinks, vaguely proud, springing into action as well. Crossing Ay’s path, on accident, of course, driving Sasuke back. 

Onoki tries to hit Sasuke with his Dust Style and Kakashi grimaces, jumping out of its path with a somersault, seeing Sasuke get away, barely. He lets his own chidori flare up, watching Sasuke vault to turn his blade against Kakashi. Knowing I can take it.

Ay yells at Kakashi, voice dark, preparing to jump at Sasuke. “He’s mine.”

Kakashi grimaces and steps into Ay‘s way, his voice cold, watching Gaara watch them almost dispassionately while keeping the destruction at bay with his sand from the corner of his eyes. “He’s my responsibility.”

 

 

Obito’s voice is icy, but calm and weirdly gleeful, bringing them all to a halt. “But… He’s my tool.”

They all freeze, looking at Obito, who is perched on one of the desks.

Obito lifts a gloved finger. 

A Zetsu raises from the ground and envelops Sasuke, easily. 

 

In the blink of an eye. 

 

 

Kakashi tries to catch Sasuke’s gaze, sees the deep disgust on it for a split second before he’s gone. So. Still not like being called a tool, I see. He smirks grimly, while eying Obito warily. Good.

Ay roars at Obito. “You are the one that has sent him?” The Raikage inhales deeply, pointing a finger enshrouded in lightning. “Who are you.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, letting chidori flare out, before he straightens his fallen over chair and sits down, tone dry. “That is… Uchiha Madara…” He quirks an eyebrow at Obito, the orange mask staring at him, Kakashi’s tone dripping with sarcasm. “Isn’t that so?”

The mask tilts, and Obito’s finger lowers, slowly. 

Kakashi clicks his tongue. "Where are you taking him.“

Obito hums. "To his payment. In a while.“

Kakashi grimaces under his mask. To kill Danzo? Tenzou, Naruto, I hope Pakkun can track him. He sighs, slowly. “And what do you want?”

Mei cackles a laugh, pointing a finger. “Do you two know each other?”

Obito laughs, breathlessly. “No.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. Oh? He pastes an eye-smile on, giving Mei a genial shrug, tone dry. “I must be mistaken, then.” He hums, his tone turning icy. “I mean, I cannot possibly know Uchiha Madara, can I.”

There is a pause, as they all stare at Obito, who in turn stares at Kakashi.

 

And then Obito sighs, and sits down on one of the desks, fidgeting for a moment.

He starts to speak, and Kakashi listens intently, listens to the story of Rikkudo Sennin, the ten-tails jinchuriki, who wore the purple eyes first. Who sealed the body of the beast in the moon, and split the chakra up, creating the bijous. 

Kakashi blinks. So that is why you need the purple eyes… and I bet you have them already, don’t you. 

He sighs, raising his voice as Obito pauses. “And now you wish to reunite the bijous and want to become their jinchuriki?” Obito is silent, and Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Why.”

Obito hops off the table, and turns to him, the orange mask staring at him. 

Obito’s voice is low, almost gentle. “I want to cast an Infinite Tsukuyomi, to bring peace to the world.”

Kakashi frowns, while a murmur runs through the room. He grimaces. “That is just a dream though, and you know it. A sweet dream, granted, but just a dream.” And it’s not even infinite in the sense of the word… people would die dreaming it, starving to death, eventually. 

He shakes his head. “That’s not life?”

Mei’s voice is acerbic. “Right. And I don’t like genjutsus.”

Onoki scoffs. “And especially the ones cast by the sharingan… such hypocritical aspirations, to wish to rule us.”

Obito’s voice is heated. “I wish to bring us all peace.” He hesitates, the mask turning to the room. “If you do not give me the remaining jinchurikis I will have to take them by force.”

Kakashi frowns, staring at him, while Ay yells at him, indignantly, furious. He blinks, tuning the Raikage out. But… you could have taken Naruto before… even yesterday? Even now? Why… this warning. This… war? He grimaces. Why the Zetsus. Why all the robbed graves?

 

He blinks, returning to the yelling contest happening, when Obito stands up, and jumps up onto the ledge on the wall, in a bit of a huff. 

Obito’s voice is cold. “I hereby declare war on you all. The fourth great ninja war begins now.”

Kakashi gnashes his teeth. Damn.

Obito’s voice carries a growl now, a dark undertone. “The next time we meet… will be in battle.”

Reality swirls and he is gone, and Kakashi stares at the empty space he was just in, trying to make sense of it all.

 

 

 

 

Gaara is the first to speak, tone dry and firm. “Our nations must form an alliance. It’s the only way to fight the power of this army.”

The Raikage nods. “Yes, and we need someone to lead the troops.” There is a sharp-toothed grin flashing Kakashi’s way. “I think the son of the White Fang would be suitable, especially since he doesn’t want the hat… yet.”

Kakashi grimaces, silent as the others agree. He reaches up to pinch the bridge of his nose. Great. In for a dollar, in for a dime. Dammit.

 

The door flies open, and Naruto and Tenzou come in, Naruto dragging a red-haired woman with glasses with him, and Tenzou carrying… a wooden barrel.

Kakashi blinks, his low voice loud in the sudden silence. “Naruto.” He clears his throat, seeing from the corner of his eyes as Gaara sits up a bit straighter. “Who are our guests?”

The woman shoots him a sullen look from red eyes under red glasses, turning her head away. Naruto drags her along, firmly but not harshly, coming to a halt in front of Kakashi.

His cheeks are flushed, the blue eyes sparkling. “She belongs to Sasuke. Was he here?”

Mei steps over and around the desk, gliding up and around Naruto. “So you are the Leaf’s jinchuriki… we have heard much about you.” She reaches up to play with a tuft of Naruto’s hair, while ignoring the definitely heated look Kakashi throws her way. Her long nails drag along Naruto’s neck, and Kakashi can see the shiver that spreads - and the blush on Naruto’s cheeks.

He clears his throat. “Mei. Do you mind?”

Mei rolls her eyes and steps back again, with a sigh, bending down to whisper into Kakashi’s ear. “My, my, you’re lucky.” His head snaps up to look at her and she giggles softly, straightening up and stepping away, while Kakashi blushes heavily, painfully aware that everyone in the room is looking at them right now.

He swallows, tone scratchy. “I see the Mist is very well informed.”

Gaara’s voice is low, filled with something Kakashi cannot place. “I believe we all are.”

Naruto blinks at him, frowning.

Kakashi grimaces. Everyone except Naruto it seems. Just great. He sighs, massaging his temple for a moment, before addressing the woman in Naruto’s grip. “And you are?”

The bespectacled woman grimaces, her shaking voice belying her heated words. “Uzumaki Karin. Not that it’s any of your business.”

Naruto’s attention snaps to her, and Kakashi shoots him a look, wondering how much he actually knows about the big clan that was destroyed - and what he may think right now. 

He clicks his tongue. “Thank you, Karin. Now, with the permission of the others,”, he lets his gaze travel round, seeing the kages incline their heads, “and since you seem to be in league with Sasuke, who is the Leaf’s responsibility, we will take you along for proper debriefing. However…” He pauses, looking at the sliver of skin that he can see under the sleeves. And the bite-marks there. She defiantly pushes the sleeves down again. He clicks his tongue. “However, we will first need to know where Sasuke was taken.”

She pulls a face, echoing sharply. “However would I know.”

Kakashi sighs through his nose, ignoring Naruto’s sudden attention. “You must know something.” He hesitates. “The guy in the mask… he said he would take Sasuke now for payment.” He tilts his head. “Do you have any idea where that might be.”

Karin stares at him, for a long moment. And then she hisses. “I want amnesty.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, while the Tsuchikage chuckles meanly. “Why… what did you do?”

Karin is silent, and Kakashi watches her, for a long moment. He taps his finger on the desk, once. “I can offer you fair treatment. But I will not offer you a pardon without knowing what you did.” He can sense Naruto’s frown, but doesn’t look up on purpose. “However, I would like to point out, that if you do not provide us with the knowledge we need, that this will also be included in whatever your charges may come up to.”

Karin pulls a face, averting her gaze, with a sniff. She grimaces, her voice a whisper. “There’s a bridge, some ways off, to the south. Sasuke told us to meet him there if we would be separated.”

Kakashi gives her an eye-smile. “See. That wasn’t too bad.” He looks up at Naruto. “We need to take her along.”

 

Tenzou interjects, silent until now. “We can also have the others take her along. Pakkun is covering all available tracks.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “The others?”

Tenzou nods, shifting under the kage’s gazes. “Yes, we will meet them back at the inn, I have received a messenger bird summon.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. Sai and a team then. “Very well.” He nods his head at the barrel. “And what do you carry?”

Karin’s voice is a hiss. “Who.”

Tenzou shrugs, carefully as not to jostle the barrel too much. “He could liquify himself.”

Kakashi blinks at her, and then looks back at the barrel. “I see.” He tilts his head. “One of the Mist’s I gather…” He shoots a look at Mei. “Given that he is in league with Sasuke, too, do you mind us taking him along?”

Mei hums, twirling some hair between her fingers, her voice carrying her smirk. “Not at all. If nothing else it means we have to come by when Konoha has been rebuilt. And this war is over.”

Right. Kakashi sighs softly, and then nods at Tenzou, and looks up at Naruto. “Why don’t you start towards the inn then. I’ll be right with you.”

Naruto nods, and turns to leave, but Karin struggles in his grip. “Where’s Jugo?”

Kakashi tilts his head. “Jugo?”

Mifune, their host, snorts, the old Samurai’s voice dark. “He fled.”

Kakashi expects Karin to deflate, but she relaxes instead, seemingly glad. 

 

Chojuro, Mei’s aid speaks up, after listening to something in his ear-piece. “Raikage-sama, we have received intelligence of Kisame. Your brother seems to go after him.”

Ay stands up immediately, roaring again. “That cannot be. I will go to him, immediately.” He turns to his aid, Dasui. “We’re leaving.” The white-blond-haired head swivels round, the hard eyes staring at Kakashi. “We will talk soon.”

He nods at the others and is gone, and Mei clicks her tongue, in vague annoyance. “He could have asked, too… Kisame is one of our own as well.” She hums, shooting a teasing look Kakashi’s way. “Your manners are way more to my liking. Among other things.”

Kakashi inclines his head in silent thanks, trying not to feel too embarrassed. 

He looks up at Naruto, only to find him staring at Mei, quite rudely. With fire.

Kakashi blinks. Huh. Something warm flutters deep within his guts, but he refuses it, pushing it down. Now is not the time to let any satisfaction over his probable jealousy rise. Get a grip.

He clears his throat, looking around the room. “I believe the conference is over?”

Gaara nods, sharing a look with Onoki and Mei. “Yes. We will coordinate with you. And we might need to set up headquarters.”

Kakashi nods, looking back up at Karin for a moment. “First things first though. Sasuke. Not even Uchiha Madara can move an army within a day. In fact, this will take a while I bet.”

Onoki harrumphs. “True. Especially at his age.”

Mei drawls. “Right? He seemed to be in good shape.”

They all look at Kakashi. 

Who clears his throat. “Yeah well, at some point that mask will have to fall, right?”

Naruto interjects, voice hard. “I’ll tear it off if need be.”

 

Mei chuckles. “You, my boy, will not go near him.”

Naruto’s eyes flash. “What.”

Gaara’s voice is soft. “We need to protect you. He must not get his hand on your bijou.”

Naruto grimaces, averting his gaze.

Onoki rises a bit into the air, shooting a look at his daughter and his aid. “Time to leave and to prepare. Who knows how much time he will grant us.”

Mei sighs, and then pushes up as well, reaching up to run her fingers through Karin’s red hair, who glowers at her, silently. “Indeed. We will need a few months at least to start production of material. Let’s not waste time.” She shoots Kakashi a look, while nodding at Karin. “I would bet my life that she is one of descendants of the side-clans, like my mother was. Her hair is too curly for the main.”

Kakashi blinks, with a frown, and then nods, in thanks, while wondering what to do with that information.

Karin pulls a face, crossing her arms.

Naruto blinks. 

Kakashi sighs, and then stands up. “Very well.” He nods at the others. “Let’s do this.”

 

Let’s prepare and go to war.

 

The fourth big one.

 

The second for me.

 

He sighs.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He watches as Sakura intercepts them, tries to convince Naruto that she loves him.

Like that.

 

 

Kakashi knows he should be embarrassed, witnessing this, but he’s morbidly fascinated instead, a state that seems to be shared by everyone watching. 

 

It’s not that Kakashi doubts that Sakura loves Naruto by now. 

But… like that?

No way. 

 

 

He’s also vaguely doubtful that she loves Sasuke like that.

Though he doesn’t doubt that she loves him, either.

 

But love has many forms. 

And while you cannot help loving someone… truly, really loving them like THAT is another thing, entirely.

 

He is immensely proud, when Naruto simply sees through it, calls her out. Gently but firmly.

 

He’s about to signal for them to split up and leave, with Tenzou still carrying the barrel and Karin in Sai’s grip, when there is movement off to the side, and Gaara steps out, quietly. 

Sakura grimaces, disappearing towards the inn with a bitter expression, and Kakashi dismisses her for now, turning his attention to the Kazekage.

 

Who only has eyes for Naruto, slowly stepping up to him.

Gaara’s green eyes are big, and hard, though his voice is kind. “Naruto. Are you aware that Sasuke has attacked the kage summit?” His eyes travel to Kakashi, and then crawl back.

Naruto nods, jerkily. “Yes.” He pulls a face. “But…”

Gaara interjects, expression neutral. “That is high treason.”

The words hang in the cold air, and Kakashi grimaces, harshly. 

Gaara’s eyes swivel back and forth on Naruto’s now. “You are his friend, are you not?” Naruto nods, his jaw set. Gaara continues, almost too gently. “And you wish to become Hokage one day, still?” Naruto stares at him, frozen to the spot.

Gaara steps closer, his gaze imploring now. “As a kage, you have to be able to make the difficult decisions, the hard decisions.” He pauses. “Even if it comes to friends. Or family.”

Kakashi swallows, seeing a shiver run through Naruto’s tall frame. 

Gaara reaches for Naruto, but Naruto jerks back, his breath fast, fogging in the cold air. Gaara turns away, slowly, his soft words carrying a terrible weight. “Think about what friend you can be for him.”

 

Naruto jerks, and Kakashi grimaces, watching Naruto shiver. Dammit.

He nods at Tenzou, and he and the others and their prisoners leave, and Kakashi steps up to Naruto carefully, stepping around to look at his face.

 

And hisses, in annoyance.

Naruto’s eyes are void, his expression pained, breath too fast. His shoulders are hunched, and his head is lowered, and Kakashi snarls quietly, moving in to draw him into an embrace, feeling the shivers wreck Naruto’s frame.

He reaches up, and threads his fingers through the hair at Naruto’s nape, rocking him a bit back and forth, grunting and following the weight down to the ground when Naruto’s knees buckle. He draws Naruto in tighter, and then starts to knead, tries to get through to him, silently cursing Gaara for being so fucking blunt.

He grimaces. But he is not completely wrong, is he. And Naruto cannot have a panic attack when shove comes to push when he is Hokage… He closes his eyes, burying his nose in the golden hair, inhaling deeply. So what does that mean? What does it mean for his dream?

Naruto sobs in his arms and shifts, pushing his nose under Kakashi’s jaw. Drawing on Kakashi’s strength.

 

Kakashi exhales, and then huffs a laugh, hands stroking now, the answer as simple as heavy.

Guess I’ll have to be there for him, every step of the way. Help him bear the pain these decisions bring.

 

 

Whatever happens.

 

He snorts gently, tightening his arms.

 

 

 

But I would be anyways.

 

For every step of the way.

 

 

 

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, and lets the world fade a bit, covered by snowflakes and gloomy light, reduced to them, and Kakashi dreams lazily, just for a moment, sweet daydreams of a future that seems to be close now, so close.

 

 

 

So, so close.

 

 

 

Notes:

I‘m sorry Konan, but there was no way they could have intercepted Obito 😥

Also: I once saw this really gorgeous, VERY nsfw art of Mei with Kakashi… it doesn’t fit in here but given how comfortably they are with each other in Boruto… *coughs* Another life, another time :))
(In the manga, she also marries someone looking suspiciously like Kakashi in her dream (chapter 678) ^^^)

Chapter 34: Pitch black abyss

Notes:

Alright. So… there are a few pairings/relationships coming up that literally would not even be possible outside this story setup (or a similar, different AU). I have NOT read any of the stories for those that have tags on here (since I'm too busy with this monster at this point^^).
I literally stumbled into these relationships while writing, because, as with Yugao and Tenzou, they make sense to me, then and there, in this story, when I encounter them. I hope I don’t stumble in any of your NOTPs^^, but as I said, they made sense there and then. Hope they will do so for you, too.

> I’m not going to tag them explicitly (most of them at least) because of the Ao3 tag limit, and because it affects a lot of the “supporting” characters… I will tag the additional main ones in a while, when they’re properly established.

The pairings already tagged are valid, no worries.💕

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

Tenzou’s eyes snap to his when he reenters the inn with Naruto, his expression grave, his voice low, though not hiding the words from the others. “Sakura has gone, likely to go after Sasuke.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking down into Naruto’s eyes, where the light is starting to burn again. He nods to himself, expression grim. “Fine. I’ll go after her. You will take Naruto and go back to Konoha with Sai and the others.” Naruto opens his mouth to protest, but Kakashi lifts his hand cutting him off, and Naruto falls silent, glowering. He looks at the small group currently putting on their cloaks in the entrance hall of the inn. He nods at Karin. “We have to get her a coat, too.”

The barrel shifts, and an indignant voice yells, words indecipherable. 

Tenzou turns his head, obviously annoyed. “I’ll let you out if you promise to behave. And yes, you can then have a coat also.”

There is a small pause, and then a word that could probably count as acquiescence can be heard, and Tenzou sighs, pushing the barrel over into a corner and then releasing the wood, and a mass of water drops to the ground, reassembling immediately into an indignant looking man with light blue hair and a sharp fang sticking out. 

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Nice trick. And you are?”

“Suigetsu.” The man shoots Karin a look. “Looks like Sasuke abandoned us.”

Karin glowers at him. Suigetsu huffs.

Kakashi nods at Kiba, indicating their cloaks, and Kiba nods and leaves, to buy something suitable from the innkeeper. Suigetsu sniffs, looking after him, before entering a staring contest with Tenzou.

 

Kakashi exhales, turning to Naruto, who is staring at him, with something indecipherable on his face. He clicks his tongue. “I will go after Sasuke now.”

Naruto’s face twitches, but his voice is almost expressionless. “Why not me.”

Kakashi nods once, and then lowers his voice, so it doesn’t carry too far. “I am your Sensei… and his, too. If it comes to it - I will make the decision.” He swallows. “Take that responsibility.”

Naruto’s face crumbles, and he looks away, in abject pain.

Kakashi grimaces, leaning in. “I will do my fucking best not to let it come to that.”

Naruto sniffs, and then nods, jerkily, once.

 

Kakashi squeezes his shoulder, shares a look with Tenzou and is gone, turning his grim face into the wind.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

The susanoo is purple and massive.

Kakashi stares at it, tries to not be intimidated by it, Sasuke’s dark eyes glowering at him from within its coat. What are you thinking now… what options do you see? Did you sense that I was trying to help you there, at the conference? He narrows his eyes, and opens his mouth to call out, hesitating when he feels Sasuke’s attention shift.

 

Sasuke’s eyes flicker up to the ceiling of the bridge, where Sakura charges towards him.

 

Kakashi grimaces, shifting to try to intercept her, knowing Sasuke is alone right now.

Dammit, Sakura. Not now. Obito’s gone momentarily to take Danzo’s body away, this is our window of opportunity… He turns, as if in slow motion, seeing the purple vanish from the corner of his eyes as Sasuke flashes backward, his hand twisting the knife from Sakura as she hesitates.

Kakashi yells, remembering Tsunade’s words, knowing the knife is poisoned in all likelihood. Dammit, you two, just drop the darn thing. 

 

Sasuke twists the knife, driving her back and pointing it at Sakura, whose eyes widen, her mouth opening, everything happening fast, so fast and then… Naruto jumps in-between, carrying Sakura out of reach.

 

Kakashi halts, breathing heavily, looking at the them all, those three, his team.

 

The thought is not without a dark kind of humor. Team 7, all alive and healthy… for now. 

He clears his throat. “Sasuke, I…” He trails off as Sasuke charges at Naruto, with a yell. What the hell. He jumps up and between, driving Sasuke off with taijutsu, their sharingans locking. He drives Sasuke up the bridge, trying to make sense of his behavior, letting himself fall off of it with a curse as Sasuke jumps down again, towards Naruto.

Kakashi puts in a burst of speed, glad when he can put himself between Naruto and Sasuke at least, staring at the raven-haired youth, who is panting, heavily, the red eyes glowing. 

But there is no Amaterasu thrown our way… no genjutsu. So why are you fighting so hard, Sasuke? You don’t want to kill us? Or him?

He holds out his arm, to hold Naruto back. “This is my duty.”

I need to convince him that he can stand down now. Make him listen.

 

Naruto chimes up, behind him, tone imploring. “Sasuke, we need to talk.”

Sasuke snorts, his chidori flaring up. “Talk? Words are pathetic.”

Kakashi blinks, and then lets his own chidori flare up, too, worry twisting in his gut. Come on, Sasuke, look around you. It’s over. What the hell are you doing? His voice is dark. “Go, both of you. If you stay you’ll see things you wish you hadn’t.”

Sakura sniffs. “But…”

Kakashi smiles, gently. “Sakura, the poison laced kunai Shizune taught you won‘t kill Sasuke. He still has Orochimaru‘s immunity to poison. What’s more, he also knows how you feel…”

He can sense Naruto looking at Sakura, silently. 

 

There is a moment of nothing, like a breath, held.

 

And then Naruto’s arms envelop him, hold him, almost gently.

Unrelentingly.

 

Kakashi blinks, letting chidori flare out in surprise. “Naruto!!”

The kage bunshin at his ear whispers. “Sorry, Kaka-kun. But Sasuke and I… have to talk. The only way we know how to. By fighting and locking our energies.”

 

Shivers, all down Kakashi’s spine.

No. Please, no.

 

 

No.

 

 

Naruto jumps, despite his prayers, as if in slow motion.

Beyond the light, there is Sasuke’s twisted face.

 

 

Time freezes, in a cacophony of sound and light and energy. 

 

The lights are brighter than back then, on that hospital roof.

 

 

 

The clone’s forehead presses into Kakashi’s shoulder. Gasps.

 

 

 

But it’s there still, and the only thing that keeps Kakashi breathing.

 

 

 

 

The shockwave takes sight and sound… and it hurts.

 

 

 

An image, like an afterimage, a negative, of Sasuke and Naruto so close, their hands seemingly entwined.

 

 

The world shifts beneath their feet as the ripples of power twist the river’s water.

 

 

 

Kakashi cannot remember screaming, but he must have, because his throat hurts. 

 

 

 

When the echoes of sound and light fade he sees Naruto kneeling in front of an equally kneeling Sasuke, holding Sasuke’s left hand in both of his.

Naruto’s low voice is loud in the sudden silence, the silence only broken by their harsh breathing.  “Sasuke… were you able to read what is truly in my heart?”

Sasuke blinks, slowly, a tear dropping from his right eye, the gaze up seemingly taking a lot of energy. Kakashi watches, breathlessly, trying not to feel. 

Naruto smiles, softly, his head tilting. “You saw, didn’t you.” 

Sasuke sobs. 

 

The bunshin behind Kakashi vanishes, and he sinks to his knees as well, feeling vaguely sick, so relieved his head is spinning. 

He blinks, and then swallows, turning his head to look up at Sakura for a moment.

His voice shakes a bit, but he ignores it, eyes riveted to Sasuke once more, who stares at Naruto. “Sakura. Please draw the remaining poison out.” If I’m right, the curse mark will vanish then, too. I wish we could have done that back then. But we did not have healers capable enough.

Sakura sniffs, and then stumbles forward, hesitantly stepping up to Sasuke, who ignores her.

Green chakra flares up, and Sakura bends down to pull up a bubble of water, and Sasuke sighs, his eyes closing for a moment. Kakashi can see Naruto’s whiskers twitch with a small smile.

Sakura’s face is pinched, determined and yet carrying relief while she concentrates.

 

Kakashi clears his throat, trying to make his voice soft. “Sasuke… think we can reach Itachi before… Madara can?”

Sasuke nods, eyes still closed. 

His voice is a whisper. “Yes, I told him that he needed to get out of the hideout when I would… when I would go to the conference. I hope he was strong enough to do so.”

Kakashi swallows. “Where did you tell him to go?”

Sasuke sighs, quite obviously relaxing in increments, as more and more poison leaves his body. “I told him to go where he gave me the wrong advice.”

Kakashi blinks, and then exhales, in a rush. The inn where he fought with Jiraiya back then… close to Konoha. He nods, once. “Alright. We’ll pick him up on the way back.”

Sasuke nods, once. He tilts his head back a bit, towards Sakura. “Itachi tried to pull the poison out, too, but he lacked the necessary skills… thank you.”

Sakura nods, wordlessly, with a little sniff.

 

And then Sasuke’s eyes reopen, slowly, locking with Naruto’s. 

Naruto’s eyes crinkle. He grins. “See, you’re still here, with me.“ He shakes Sasuke’s hand in his grip. 

Sasuke scoffs, though his eyes stay gentle. “Of course, teme.“

Naruto’s grin broadens. “I told you, I’m not letting go. Now you can indeed be cuddled, to death. As promised.”

Sasuke’s expression shatters, vulnerability bleeding into it, mixed with pain.

 

And…

 

 

 

Kakashi can see the exact moment it happens. 

The moment that the light in Naruto’s eyes changes. 

 

Deepens. 

 

Sparks. 

 

The moment that his smile changes. From relieved to… inviting. 

 

Kakashi‘s gaze crawls over to Sasuke. 

Watches as Sasuke’s gaze falls down, to Naruto’s lips. 

 

Kakashi closes his eyes. 

He knows, if he were to step between them now… if he would tell… he would be able to interrupt this still. 

 

Hinder it.

 

Destroy it. 

 

Redirect it.

 

 

It would be easy, actually.

 

It’s what he wants, too.

 

 

 

He pushes up, and turns away instead. 

Decides to turn away. 

 

His mind is stuck on a single thought. 

 

 

I‘m a better man than that. 

 

I AM better. 

 

 

 

It’s a mantra, sucking him down, into an abyss of pain, pitch black and freezing. 

 

 

 

It’s a defiant mantra though, too. 

 

 

 

And he’s choking on it. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reality is a funny thing, happening on the sidelines.

 

Kakashi watches himself return to Konoha with his team, watches himself pick up a very weak and seemingly frail Itachi at that inn in the outskirts, while Sakura rushes ahead, to announce their arrival. Obviously trying to get away from them.

Kakashi cannot blame her. And Itachi seems stable enough, for now.

 

He watches himself deposit Itachi and Sasuke in a tent off to the side, Naruto rushing to get blankets.

 

Shizune stares at him when they arrive at the command tent, the whole tent falling silent immediately. 

Kakashi watches himself order Itachi and Sasuke to be held under supervision and healed, yes, but not imprisoned, almost dispassionately overruling the council and Ibiki, with Shikaku silent and Inoichi averting his gaze.

 

Stares at Sakura when she hovers there, between the tents, obviously not knowing where to go, seeming forlorn, and frail.

 

He blinks and reality jumps to Tenzou squeezing his shoulder, while Sai hugs Sakura, pulling her away.

 

 

 

And Kakashi blinks, and… lets it all go.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Shikaku is reading reports, next to him, when Kakashi wakes up the next morning. He shoots Kakashi a look, tone inflectionless. “Slept well?”

Kakashi grimaces, pushing himself up. “I guess.” He draws a hand over his face, pulling a face when he remembers how gruff he had been the previous day. That he had just left the tent, despite the questions. “Sorry for the behavior yesterday.”

Shikaku quirks an eyebrow. “No apologies necessary.”

Really. Kakashi grimaces, shooting the gruff seeming Nara clan member a look.

He clears his throat. “Still.”

Shikaku exhales through his nose, lowering the papers. “We understand.” 

Kakashi leans forward, elbows on knees, watching him silently.

Shikaku shrugs. “You do know that Inoichi and I weren’t too happy with the demands brought to you…” He shoots Kakashi a quick look. “Both he and I have kids at his age and…” He trails off, grimacing. 

Kakashi smiles and eye-smile, with an effort. “Thank you.”

Shikaku nods, once. “Still, it has been wise to take him away for so long… and to train him somewhere else, don’t you agree?”

Kakashi folds his hands, puts his chin on them. “What are you implying?”

Shikaku sighs softly. “We should send him away to train some more with the Lightning’s jinchuriki…”

Kakashi’s heart beats viciously, once, his throat dry. “You want to send him away again?”

Already? He’s just been back? And… you want to do so because of ME?

There is a pitch black part to that assessment that tears at him.

Shikaku shrugs. “I think it’s the only way to save his life in the long run. He needs to be able to control the bijou. Another instance of this…”, he gesticulates, vaguely, “and people won’t be as lenient.” He smiles grimly. “Nor as alive.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long moment. His voice is rough when he speaks. “I bet Ibiki isn’t too happy about that decision.” And neither am I.

Shikaku snorts. “Believe it or not, he is happier with this prospect than having him here at the moment.”

Kakashi grimaces, and then sighs deeply. He nods, once, the words tasting like ash. “When?”

Shikaku puts the papers away, and then shrugs, once. “In a little while. Apparently that Killer-B did manage to kill Kisame, but Ay wants to make sure his brother is full strength before he lets him go again, and he’s far from happy about the idea to teach our jinchuriki things… we might need to work on that, still. Diplomatically I mean. So, a few weeks, or months, if we have them, in our estimation. We should be able to rebuild the most important complexes during that time, too. Fortunately the tower and the hospital are still standing, if damaged. The school is damaged, but will be easy to repair, meaning the kids can go back to some semblance of normalcy soon. In your absence we have started with rebuilding the bigger housing complexes, and several of the traders and vendors have set up small stands instead, as soon as the rubble had been cleared.” He chuckles softly, shooting Kakashi a look. “Konoha is resilient, indeed.”

Kakashi nods, and then exhales, softly. “She woke up?”

Shikaku quirks an eyebrow. “How do you know?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “You didn’t call me Rokudaime.”

Shikaku chuckles, standing up. “Very good.” He turns towards the entrance, throwing the words back over his shoulder. “Though I bet I will someday.”

Kakashi sighs, loudly, deliberately, and Shikaku leaves, with a chuckle.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Inoichi is there, when he enters her tent, placing a hand on his shoulder, wordlessly, and then leaves, with a nod.

Kakashi stares after him for a moment, remembering how livid he’d been back then, livid enough to ignore how uncomfortable Inoichi had been making that demand. Still. Would I have done the same had I been in their position? He grimaces, trying to imagine, and failing. It’s all a mess. For them, too. He sighs, stepping over to the bed, where Tsunade is looking much better again.

Shizune smiles up at him, her voice low. “5 minutes, Kakashi.” She hesitates. “I brought her up to date.” Shizune gives him a small smile, and then leaves, too, and Kakashi stares after her, tone of her voice making him uncomfortable.

 

Tsunade’s soft voice draws him back, some of the usual fire still missing, but firm again, nonetheless. “She’s told me about the developments.” She sighs, and then pushes herself up to a sitting position, with an effort. Kakashi tries to help, but she playfully slaps his hand away. “Report.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, sitting down on the small stool next to her bed. 

He inhales, deeply, tries to collect his thoughts - and his emotions. “Naruto managed to convince Nagato that he will find a way to end the circle of hatred. Nagato revived the villagers, but apparently that exertion killed him. Konan, who was with him, then took Nagato’s body away. She set up a small shrine for Jiraiya with Naruto.” He hesitates, swallowing compulsively. “Sasuke deliberately fumbled in his attempt to abduct the eight-tails, and then was dropped off at the conference to kill the kages… I took a chance and intervened.”

Tsunade frowns. “Why?” She clicks her tongue at his look. “I mean, what made you think that it was deliberate and that he would defect?”

Kakashi shrugs, with a grimace. “A lot of little things. And…” He huffs. “Obito’s wishful thinking.”

She echoes, with a bit of a smile in her voice. “Obito’s wishful thinking?”

Kakashi shrugs, sharing a look with her. “Obito came by, trying to… impress Naruto I guess. I’m not sure, actually. I was afraid he would take him with himself, but he only wanted to tell him how wrong we’d been in regards to Itachi, and Sasuke, and that Sasuke was after revenge now.” He grimaces. “It was such a weird situation, you know. Why come and tell us all that?” He shakes his head. “The only reason I could think of was that…” He trails off.

Tsunade hums. “He was trying to convince himself.”

Kakashi nods. “Yes.” He swallows, with a brittle little smile. “Naruto and he are so alike… I think he wanted to convince himself that he is on the right track.”

Tsunade hums. “Yes, I heard about his speech at the conference.” Kakashi shoots her a look. She quirks an eyebrow. “The Kazekage called on video while you were still en route. Obito’s goal is a very… weird one.”

Kakashi nods. “Ah.” He looks away again, regrouping. “Yes, it is surreal. I haven’t had time to think it all out, but I… don’t think it was his idea, actually. Though I guess I can see why it seems appealing to him.” He clears his throat. “Anyways, I followed Sasuke, arrived just after he’d killed Danzo.” He clicks his tongue. “Just as Obito took Danzo’s body away…”

There is a little mean smirk on Tsunade’s lips. “Finally some good news.”

Kakashi snorts, and then shakes his head, once. “Sakura had gone after him already, intending to kill him I think, because she hadn’t known that I had decided to intervene and… help him, and I had ordered the team to return to Konoha, but of course I should have known that Naruto would ignore me…” He trails off, knowing she’s heard the way his voice had changed. 

She tilts her head. “What happened there?”

 

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, the pain so pure, so sudden and clear it is the only thing that is real, for a long, long moment. He presses the words out, as the tears fall, unheeded, his tattoo searing heat. “I saw it happen... Between them. Him and Sasuke. And I… made a decision.”

There’s a whisper in his mind, scratching along his consciousness, wringing its hands. And it‘s killing me. 

She reaches for him, pulling him in, and holds him, a bit awkwardly but surprisingly strongly, gently stroking his back. 

Her words are whispered, but loud nonetheless, and firm. “You did the right thing.”

He grimaces in pain, whispering, too, unable to do more. “Did I?”

She hums, and then releases him, gently but surely pushing him back to look at him. “What else.” 

He sniffs, looking away, his voice shivering a bit. “He remembers Loran, and he met Minato in some kind of chakra memory.” He gasps a laugh. “So I guess you can put up those photos now.”

She smiles, softly. “That’s good. I was growing tired of staring at empty frames.”

He nods, sniffing again. 

 

Her words reach him as if from far away. “You know… there’s something wonderful to this as well, Kakashi… your team is finally back. And safe and sound, too.”

Kakashi gasps a laugh, shivering with the effort it takes to suppress the pain. “So it is.” He swallows, focusing, with an effort. “What about him? And Itachi?”

Tsunade hums, looking away. “It doesn’t make sense to go and punish them for something that they were led to do, does it.” She clicks her tongue. “Both Itachi and Sasuke were only pieces on the board.” She snorts. “And I bet they hate that.”

Kakashi snorts as well, wiping at his eyes. “Aren’t we all though? But there are consequences to our actions.” He swallows. “There have to be.”

Tsunade weighs her head, with a hum. “More ore less, yes. But Itachi was pushed by our own village, while Sasuke was used by the other side, so to speak, and so I guess… I cannot let them go free, but I will not have them simply executed either.” She sighs, deeply, rubbing a hand over her face. “We’ll see when Itachi has healed, and has been properly debriefed.”

Kakashi nods, looking away. “Do they know what it is?”

Tsunade shakes her head. “Not really, no. Some kind of artificial virus. They’ve been treating the symptoms, and he’s slowly getting better, but they say it will still take a while.”

Kakashi frowns, shooting her a look. “Was that doctor with him?”

Tsunade shakes her head. “No, he fled apparently as soon as he deposited Itachi at that inn.” She snorts, grimly. “Given Obito’s skills, and the whole messy situation I really cannot blame him though.”

Kakashi hums, agreeing. He clicks his tongue. “So, what now?”

 

Tsunade is silent for a long moment, and then she sighs, her hazel eyes softening. “Now, you will  help with rebuilding the housing complexes. The physical work will give you some peace of mind.”

Kakashi looks away, grimacing. 

Tsunade’s hand clasps his left shoulder, squeezing it. “You will have to stay back and let them make their own decisions.” She hesitates. “Let him make his own experiences.”

Kakashi snorts, and then draws a shaking hand over his face. His words are a whisper, but said out loud this time. “It’s killing me.”

With every breath I take.

 

Tsunade’s words are soft, so soft, and kind, wounding. “I know.”

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Iruka is there, too, silently joining the efforts of rebuilding the jonin complex.

Kakashi nods, and then shoots him a look, with a sniff, wiping the dust off his mask. “Not with the kids?”

Iruka shoots him a small smile. “Anko took them to training ground 11 to power them out a bit.” He hesitates, and then clicks his tongue, once. “Besides, I think I’m needed more… here.”

Kakashi swallows, returning to fastening the wooden beam. Knowing Iruka is here for him. He clears his throat. “You should get some rest. I bet the little imps are very exhausting to watch over.”

Iruka hums. “So should you.”

Kakashi smiles, grimly. “Physical exercise is good in that respect.”

Iruka holds the beam, while he hammers in the fastenings. “So is peace of mind.”

Kakashi snorts, shooting him a look. “But so much harder to come by.”

Iruka nods. “So I heard.”

Kakashi looks at him for a long moment, and then turns away. “So what else have you heard?”

Iruka blinks, and then lowers his voice. “Lots of rumors… the village is buzzing with it. There’s things I have seen, also.”

Kakashi jerks, viciously, and then curses, when his finger catches between beams for a moment. Iruka watches him, quietly.

Kakashi sniffs, and then shifts the beam into place, reaching for another one. 

Iruka sighs through his nose, voice kind. “I didn’t know you were so proficient with building.”

Kakashi scoffs. “Yeah, well, not really, I’m just doing the same three things over and over again.”

Iruka looks at the structure they’re working on, tone dry. “You’re full of shit.”

Kakashi snorts, despite himself. He shrugs. “I repair my family home when needed because the beams get moldy sometimes… over time, I managed quite well I guess.” He sniffs, and then pushes the next beam into place, nodding at the fastenings. “Wanna give it a try?”

“Errr… sure.” Iruka nods, and reaches for the hammer, fastening the beam with his instructions. He steps back, eying his work, and then puts the hammer in Kakashi’s hands again, with a wry smile. “I think I’ll leave this to you. You’re better with… driving things home anyways.”

Kakashi blinks, shooting Iruka a half annoyed, half amused look over the weird comment. “What?”

Iruka scratches his head, expression sheepish. “The lesson you drove home with the bells was quite successful, wasn’t it?”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, tone gruff again instantly. “Just spill.” He swallows. “Please.” I don’t have the nerves for this, Iru-kun.

 

Iruka sighs. “Fine.” He clears his throat, tone low. “Naruto is always with Sasuke, in the tent off to the side. He accompanies Sasuke to the meals. And…”

Kakashi hammers the fastening in, tone hard. “And?”

Iruka sighs, deeply. “And I saw them laugh with each other. With Sakura, too, but Naruto and Sasuke seemed to dance around each other. And then yesterday…”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away, his tone raw. “What of yesterday.”

Iruka watches him, expression kind, and it hurts. Kakashi averts his gaze. “And yesterday I was there as well, when they left again, and Sasuke drew Naruto behind a tree and he leaned in, and…” He trails off. 

Kakashi shivers, reaching for the next beam, feeling feverish. He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “Why are you telling me this, Iruka.” Why do you feel the need to put this before me? Hurt me with it? You? Of all people? Kakashi tries to steady his hand, to no use, his fingers shaking. He puts the beam down, stares at it silently. 

Iruka’s voice is a whisper, pressed into his jaw as he envelops Kakashi in a hug. “I didn’t want you to hear from anybody else.”

Kakashi’s knees buckle, and Iruka follows him down, still holding him, arms the only thing keeping Kakashi upright. 

Iruka sniffs. “It’s alright. I’m here.” He sniffs again. “You’re doing the right thing.”

Kakashi barks a laugh, his limbs numb, unable to return the embrace, his head heavy on Iruka’s shoulder, staring unseeing into space. The words taste like bile. “So I hear.” So I keep telling myself.

Iruka nods, and pulls him tighter, softly rubbing Kakashi’s back. “My house still stands. You know you can stay with me?”

Kakashi closes his eyes. Every word takes an enormous effort to shape. “What of Anko.”

Iruka chuckles, a bit surprised and embarrassed. “Oh, that.” He clears his throat. “We’ve ended that again… it was not to last and we knew that.” He exhales, and then playfully tickles Kakashi, once. “Besides, that was not what I meant.” He swallows, his voice filled to the brim with emotions suddenly. “I will always love you, Kaka-kun, but crossing that bridge again, now…” He presses a kiss behind Kakashi’s ear. “Wouldn’t be a good idea.” He softly claps Kakashi’s back. “You can have the couch.”

Kakashi snorts, softly, the love that’s pouring off of Iruka and into him giving him enough strength to finally lift his arms a bit and return the embrace, the world around them very far away. 

His words are almost inaudible. “Thank you.” He swallows. “You’re one of the rocks of my foundation.”

Iruka shifts slightly, pressing his nose closer, with a hum. “As you are mine, never doubt that.” One hand comes up to gently stroke Kakashi’s nape. “This pain will pass, too. You will manage to let him make his own decisions, and then let him come to you, eventually. I know it.”

Kakashi sobs, once, holding fast now, his voice brittle. “Sora said she had faith in me, that I would be able to bear it… but how can I?” How can I possibly bear it? Seeing them? Knowing? Knowing how his kiss feels like? What it can be? Could be? Should be? How??

 Iruka hums again, softly stroking. “You can… I know you can.” He draws back a bit, to look at Kakashi’s red-rimmed eye. “And if your strength fails come to me.” There’s a small smile on Iruka’s lips. “As you have, before.” Iruka tilts his head, presses a kiss to the corner of Kakashi’s eye. “I am always there for you.”

Kakashi’s voice is gruff, the mask growing wet from the silent tears that fall now. “It feels like I am using you, again, and again.”

Iruka hums, and then grins, deliberately, playfully, with a wink. “I’ll come and collect a favor at some point… you just wait and see.”

Kakashi snorts, and then shakes his head, once. He sniffs. “Now I’m afraid.”

Iruka laughs out loud, and then playfully pokes him. “As you should be.” He pushes back slightly, and stands up, holding out his hand. His voice is warm. “Up, Kaka-kun. Let’s repair the damage that’s been done.” He hesitates. “It will be alright, I know it.”

Kakashi stares a the proffered hand for a long moment, and then takes it, with a sniff, pulling himself up. He reaches up to trace Iruka’s scar for a moment, tone wistful. “One of the best things in my life, right here.”

Iruka’s nose crinkles. “And here to stay, too.”

Kakashi nods, tone gruff, turning back to the structure. “Good.”

 

Thank you.

 

 

Iruka smirks at him, very softly. “You still need to tell me all about your visit to the afterlife…”

Kakashi snorts, and then sniffs. “You might need to find a bottle of sake to go with that one.”

Iruka grins, and then waggles his eyebrows. “I heard you will be able to move into the new jonin complex soon… I’ll come by for housewarming.”

Kakashi snorts, and then nods, once. “Alright.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Breathing is a bit easier again after Iruka’s visit, and Kakashi even manages to meet whispers and stares with a defiant eye-smile, something that had seemed impossible before. 

 

The housing complexes go up in record time, fully wooden for now in order to provide housing first, comfort later, and Kakashi knows that they will have to be replaced one by one with more sturdy structures at some point, but it does feel surreal to stand in a small and unfurnished apartment two weeks later, no kitchen, no bathroom, sure, but a place with a door, and a little wooden cupboard to put ones scarce belongings and the futon mat.

 

Kakashi looks at the single, small window, puts his father’s tanto under it onto the floor, and exhales.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Naruto is there, a few days after the jonins moved into the new complex, making room in the tents, to everyone’s delight. After Iruka had been by, as promised, with a bottle of sake.

 

Kakashi stares at him, standing in front of the door, weirdly reluctant to let him into the single-room apartment, the space feeling like his soul, ripped open and easy to dig around in.

He steps aside to let Naruto in, nonetheless. 

With an effort.

 

Naruto steps in, toeing his shoes off there at the door, and halting at the end of the futon mat, fidgeting. 

Kakashi sniffs, closing the door, and dropping his gaze to the small plant in Naruto’s hands. 

He keeps his voice soft and stable, with an effort. “Mr. Ukki 2?”

Naruto grins, for a moment, ducking his head. “I guess?” He raises his eyes again, chin coming up almost defiantly. He indicates the small room with a nod. “You definitely need something living in here.”

Kakashi hums, carefully taking up position on the other side of the mat, hands clenched to fists in his pockets. “That’s very kind of you.”

Naruto nods, fidgeting again, and then he bends down, to put the small plant next to Kakashi’s mat. “You need to water it every few days.”

Kakashi nods. “Thank you.”

 

There is a small, very uncomfortable, pregnant pause.

 

Finally, Naruto grimaces. “Have you heard?”

He doesn’t specify what and for a moment Kakashi has half the mind to ask for a million other things, but he curbs the impulse, knowing it would only lead to anger, and while he does feel like lashing out thank you very much he is also reluctant to hurt Naruto, his whole body yearning instead. 

He swallows, his throat clicking. “I heard about you and Sasuke.” He hesitates, seeing those blue eyes snap to his. His voice sounds almost normal. “Sensei Iruka saw you kissing.”

Naruto blushes, instantly, deeply, looking away. 

Kakashi looks at him, at how the whiskers glow, mind carefully blank.

 

And then Naruto looks back, instantly and viciously destroying his painstakingly built equilibrium. His voice sounds breathless. “His kiss tastes different than yours.”

Kakashi shudders, turning away slightly, feeling light headed. He wants to ask, but refrains, the world echoing somehow, Naruto’s words like the ringing of a bell. “Very different. But he…”

He trails off and Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long moment.

When Naruto doesn’t continue he grimaces, and then prompts, grimly. “He?”

Naruto lifts his chin, tone acerbic suddenly. “He wants to kiss me.”

Kakashi snorts, he cannot help himself. Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me. “And that’s why…”

Naruto interjects, tone heated. “No, of course not.”

They glower at each other, for a long moment.

 

And then Naruto plops down, all the energy leaving him, sitting there in a heap that screams ‘forlorn‘. 

Kakashi blinks, and then very carefully lowers himself, too, watching Naruto silently. Bracing himself. 

Naruto‘s voice is a whisper, loud in the small room. "I love being near him… I love it when he looks at me. I love the smell of his hair“, a small smile flits over his face, there and gone again, while Kakashi concentrates on breathing, "I love his touch.“ He shivers. "It tingles.“ He frowns, looking up at Kakashi. "Not like yours.“ His hand comes up over his stomach, over the seal. "But still…“ The blue eyes come up, burn into Kakashi. "And he is starved, like you.“

Kakashi jerks, as if from whiplash. 

Naruto smiles, a bit sadly. "I love him.“ He blinks. "How can I love him if I love you?“

Kakashi cannot help himself, he snorts. 

Naruto glowers at him, silently, obviously suddenly pissed as hell. 

Kakashi sniffs, and shakes his head, holding up a hand, trying to appease. 

He presses the words out. "I told you, there’s love outside bonds.“ He freezes, suddenly realizing what he’s said, oh my god I implicitly told him about our bond, what if… but Naruto only frowns, staring at him. 

His voice seems a bit off. "I just told you I love you and that’s all you have to say?“

Pain, pain again, jabbing at Kakashi’s heart. 

He gasps a laugh, the tone wobbly, forcing himself to ignore the disappointment, the idiotic disappointment that Naruto didn’t catch on, and I cannot force it, now, I shouldn’t. And… I cannot say it back, now, either. If I would… "And what, Naruto, would you have me say? Beg you to break up with him?“ He chuckles, devoid of any humor, hand falling to his knee. "You are like Yin and Yang.“ He swallows, voice dropping to a whisper, suffused with truth. "It was bound to happen.“

He blinks, realizing and allowing the truth of the thought. Or you would have clashed, like they did. Just worse. 

Naruto frowns. "Is that why you kept away?“

Kakashi smiles sharply, bitingly. Evading. "What do you think?“

Naruto blinks, slowly. "I think you’re hurting.“ Kakashi grimaces, looking away, and Naruto continues, relentlessly. "You didn‘t even come by yet… you‘ve been avoiding us.“ He clicks his tongue. "You don’t want to see.“

Kakashi grimaces, and then shrugs, all his anger gone suddenly. "You said you sensed my longing. Tell me then. Is that so surprising?“

They are silent for a long moment as Naruto stares at him. 

And then Naruto’s voice comes, small, shivering, brutally honest. "I don’t know what to do.“

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut. 

Oh damn you, Naruto, for coming to ME for advice.  

He swallows, and then exhales, making himself speak the words, making himself look up. "Does it feel right?“ He swallows again, his throat clicking. "With him, I mean?“

Naruto blinks, eyes huge on Kakashi’s. "Yes.“

Kakashi smiles an eye-smile that hurts. "Well then… my advice is the same as for Shion.“ Fucking shit. He needs three tries to force the words out, trying to not falter under Naruto‘s gaze. "Do what your gut tells you.“

He blinks, adding with fatalistic clarity: "I will be here for you.“ He smiles, bravely, knowing Naruto can take the last part as support, but realizing also just how true the statement is for him. I will be here, waiting, for you. For as long as it takes. He swallows again, with a lump in his throat. 

Naruto‘s voice is a whisper. "I love him… and I want to know, to feel, to…“ He trails off, blushing.

Kakashi exhales, deeply, and then nods, once. His voice sounds vaguely off, but he’s quite proud that it’s steady. "Follow that feeling then, Naruto.“ He hesitates, tasting bile. "Find out.“

Naruto blinks, a tear dropping from the big blue eyes. His voice is a whisper. "Will you be alright?“

 

And Kakashi wants to scream, wants to yell, wants to shake Naruto and hug him, and kiss him…

But all he does, says, firmly, drawing on other people‘s belief in him, desperately, is: "Yes.“

 

Ignoring the voice that whispers:

No. I won’t be. 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

"Oh. You‘ve already have a new plant.“ Obito chuckles. "For some reason I hadn’t thought you would replace it so easily.“

Kakashi blinks up at him, tiredly, and absolutely not in the mood for games. "He brought it.“

Didn’t you say we wouldn’t see each other again? Before the war?

"Ah.“ Obito turns to him, holding out the plant he is holding. "So you don’t want it back?“

Kakashi pushes himself up into a sitting position, slowly, his voice toneless. "Why do you have Mr. Ukki?“ Why are you here?

Obito shrugs, and then kneels down and puts it next to the other plant, the mask tilting back. "Giving it names is weird, don’t you think?“

Kakashi clenches his jaw. "Don’t evade the question Obito.“

Obito sighs, deeply. "I… came by when Nagato was here. I wanted to watch.“ He hesitates. "When your boy started to rage I…“

Kakashi stares at him, trying to make sense of it. "You came here and saved Mr. Ukki for me?“

Obito is silent and Kakashi frowns, looking at the stiff back. He clicks his tongue. "Or did you.“ He chuckles, once. "No, you came here and took it as a memento… because I was dead then.“

And you wanted something to remember me by. Oh Obito. 

 

Obito is silent for a long time, his voice haunted when he finally speaks again. "Did you see her?“

Kakashi reaches out, slowly, placing his palm onto Obito’s back. Vaguely surprised, but then again not, when Obito actually lets him. He debates gathering chakra for chidori for a split second but refrains, deciding to pay into the trust for now. "No. I only saw my father. He waited for me, in what he called the anteroom. It was so peaceful there.“ He snorts, a bit bitterly. "I didn’t want to return.“ And I knew why, too. And lo, behold, I was right. 

Obito is silent for another long moment. His voice is inflectionless when he finally speaks. "Why did you?“

Kakashi blinks, slowly, staring at his own hand on the black cloth. "He said that there is something I have to do, still.“

Obito snorts, a sound that is dark and yet filled with humor. "We have that much in common then.“

Kakashi tilts his head, tone deliberately light. "Your father gave you a shitty task, too?“

Obito snorts, and there’s a smile tugging on Kakashi’s lips now. Obito shakes his head. "No, not my father.“

Kakashi hums. "So, how…“ … did Madara cheat death. He frowns, deciding to go another way. "What was Madara like?“

Obito tilts his head slightly, and Kakashi stares at the headband holding it, yearning to pull it off. 

Obito’s voice sounds faraway. "Vain. Powerful. Charismatic. Brooding.“ He clicks his tongue. "Yearning.“

Kakashi whispers. "Just a human then.“

Obito laughs, softly, under his breath. "Sometimes.“

He falls silent, and Kakashi watches him, wanting to ask more but afraid to burst this weird bubble of half-trust that they seem to be stuck in. 

Kakashi moves his thumb, deliberately, in a miniature stroking gesture. "Was the plan his idea?“

Obito sighs, through his nose. "His vision.“ The mask tilts back a bit, a sliver of white skin visible in the low light of the moon. "My dream.“

Kakashi smiles, painfully. "But, Obito, it‘s a dream…“ Literally, even. It’s not real. 

The mask turns back again, forward, and Obito moves away and Kakashi sighs, deeply. 

 

Obito stands up, towering over him. Defiantly.

Kakashi wrecks his mind, trying to come up with something, latching onto something that’s been flashing up again and again as a realization, but that had been inconsequential, all things considered. "You’re not using kamui anymore.“ He clicks his tongue. "The word, I mean.“

Obito sighs and then nods, stepping away but turning, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed. "True. I mastered the transportation aspects of it.“ The mask tilts. "Just as you mastered the attack properties of it. You’re not using the word anymore either.“

Kakashi smirks gently. "It’s our jutsu.“

Obito stares at him. 

 

Kakashi has a sudden flash of impression of how other people might be unnerved by his missing facial expressions, because he sure as hell would love to see Obito right now. 

He averts his gaze, unwilling to dwell on it too long, because that is something he knows he cannot change right now. 

Is unwilling to even contemplate changing right now. 

 

I need the mask, desperately, especially now. I need it to hide myself behind it.

Just as he does. 

 

But then again, I’m not wearing it now, am I. He blinks. How is it, for you, to see me? You never did back then? He frowns, remembering Naruto calling it a special spell he can use. 

 

He exhales, returning his gaze to the eye that he knows is behind the eyehole, wondering at the missing second one. Did you never replace it? Have you replaced it… with something else?

 

When Obito finally speaks again his tone is flat. "Why the hell did you inhale against my neck there? At the inn?“

Kakashi shrugs, carefully watching the body language. "You are one of the few people I… always liked. I wanted to update my knowledge of you.“ Catch your scent. 

Obito scoffs. "For your pack?“

Kakashi shakes his head. "No, they‘ve had your scent ever since you picked up Danzo.“ He narrows his eyes. "What did you do with him all this time?“

Obito grunts, looking away for a moment. “I put him in a room, wined and dined him. When he got restless and demanding, I…”, he hesitates, the voice shifting to something more sinister, meaner, “I showed him that he is not worthy of carrying it.” He snorts. “Or them.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “So he did take some of the eyes?”

Obito cackles. “Some. Not as many as he’d have liked. He grew them artificially, somewhere.”

Kakashi blinks. “Oh, I bet Orochimaru has his fingers in that one.” He tilts his head. “It’s why you decided to foil his plan with Sasuke back then, isn’t it.” Obito shifts slightly, and Kakashi narrows his eyes, continuing. “But that also made you aware of Sasuke. Probably through Itachi’s behavior… you had thought all the other Uchiha were gone, but there was this boy, with all this hate in him, hate you were the reason of, ultimately, the one who caused…”

“Stop!” Obito’s call is heated, his breathing audible.

Kakashi falls silent, watching him.

 

And then he asks, almost gently. “Why didn’t you take Sasuke away? The other day, I mean?”

Obito’s tone is biting. “You didn’t accept my last punishment.”

Kakashi gnashes his teeth, trying to hold firm against the instant flare of pain, to no use. He shakes his head though, by sheer will, voice a gasp. “Noooo, that’s not it.” He sniffs. “But you realized that Sasuke is very much trouble, or can be.” He snorts. “And you already have back what you need.” He blinks up at Obito. “That is why…” He trails off, looking at the orange mask.

Obito turns it away, shifting again, silent but waiting, and Kakashi blinks, another piece clicking into place. 

He exhales, deeply. “It’s why you pushed him into all these situations, isn’t it. You wanted to see if he could develop it as well. You wanted to see if a fight with Danzo would be emotionally triggering enough to develop the rinnegan.”

You were trying to make them fight in order to see if he would develop it in a fight with Naruto.

Obito is silent for a moment and then chuckles, his tone vaguely off. “Very good.”

Kakashi shakes his head once. He makes his tone soft. “Did it feel good getting it back?”

Obito pushes off the wall, and steps over to the window, looking out of it. He shrugs.

Kakashi pushes up as well, stepping up behind him. “Did she give you a run for your money?” I would bet anything that Konan didn’t want you to take it from Nagato. 

This triggers a snort, and then a sniff, and the mask tilts back just slightly, the voice hollow. “She was astonishing.” He laughs, just gently, under his breath. “She almost managed to kill me.”

Kakashi blinks, staring at his head. So there is a way to hurt you after all. Are you telling me because you yearn for me to stop you? He remembers Jiraiya’s words suddenly, spoken a felt lifetime ago. ‘You might be the only one to stop him. The only one who can.’

He licks his lips, going out on a limb, but then again, not really. “You miss her.”

The dark-haired head inclines, the mask shifting down, and Kakashi can see now that there are two tones of skin-color in Obito’s throat, the white skin that looks like a Zetsu’s, all the way to his neck and he frowns, almost missing the words.

“I do.”

And Kakashi feels with him, feels the pain, and devastation, and longing, and loneliness, and he wants to ask, wants to plead, wants to offer him to come back… but he refrains, knowing on some kind of level, through some kind of awareness that the mask… will have to come off first. 

He sniffs, letting his sincerity color his words. “I’m glad the Zetsus managed to heal you.”

Obito snorts, sniffing again. “Yeah, well, they always do.”

Kakashi frowns, carefully keeping any aggression out of his words. “Is that why you need an army of them?”

Obito cackles, the mask tilting back for a moment. “So you found them… Well, I am not our Sensei… I cannot just flash from one foe to the other and take them out single-handedly.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, shaking his head, once. “Despite your skill?”

There is a moment, and then Obito turns to him, the orange mask seeming ominously black with the moonlight behind him. “My skill is not speed, but you know that.” He tilts his head. “Why do you ask.”

Kakashi swallows, working his jaw. Trying to catch the gaze behind the mask. “Is that why you need him?” He swallows. “Them?”

Obito leans forward just slightly, echoing. “Need them?”

Kakashi blinks, and then frowns. “Their graves have been disturbed during Pain’s attack. Tissue has been removed, just small samples, but still…” He pulls a face in disgust, then smiles, grimly. “Enough for Edo Tensei, apparently.” He exhales, trying to reach emotional equilibrium. “I thought that you had done that.”

Obito scoffs, a weird undertone to his voice. “Me? I would ne…” He trails off.

There’s a shiver, running down Kakashi’s spine now. “I see.” So who? Maybe… I bet it’s Kabuto. Who has learned it all from Orochimaru. He swallows, tone caustic. “So will you accept their help when they offer it to you?” He grimaces, taking a small step forward, his chest almost touching Obito’s now. He drops his voice to a whisper. “Will you use Minato and the others for your war?” He clenches his jaw, pressing the words out. “Defile them like that?”

He is so close now he can smell Obito again, a weird, clean smell that is not entirely human, surrounded by the smell of worn cloth and cave fungus.

 

Obito doesn’t move away, doesn’t move at all, actually, for long minutes.

When he speaks again, he sounds tired, and yet there is this weird note of excitement, shivering in his voice. “Well. I guess we’ll get to see whether the son really surpasses the father then.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, whispering. “Please, don’t do that.” He blinks his eyes open again, letting the tear fall, unheeded. “Don’t do that to them.”

Obito reaches up, slowly, carefully, and Kakashi holds still, letting him place his gloved palm on his cheek. Obito’s voice is soft, so gentle it cuts. “But Minato is in hell now, isn’t he… wouldn’t it be nice for him to catch a break?”

Kakashi grimaces, shivering under the small touch now, his own fingers twitching. “Please.” Please don’t.

Obito hums, withdrawing his hand slowly, the fingers stroking. “I guess the dice are still rolling…” He steps back a bit, and then reaches up to wipe at a tear on Kakashi’s face, trailing softly down the scar. “I will not come back again. There’s too much to do, still. We will meet there. When the pieces are set.”

Kakashi swallows, compulsively, tone raw. “Where.”

Obito’s hand drops away, leaving Kakashi feeling bereft. “Well, on the battlefield, of course.” He inhales deeply, the mask tilting. “You can try and stop me then.”

Kakashi presses his lips together for a long moment. “I will.”

There is a small chuckle, echoing behind the mask. 

 

And then the swirl comes, swallowing Obito up, but not before he whispers: “Good.”

 

 

And Kakashi stands there, reaching, a pitch black abyss of churning feelings within him.

 

I will. 

 

 

 

Notes:

Obito keeping his prisoners in his dimension is canon btw - chapter 520 of the manga shows him retrieving Danzo’s bodyguards for Kabuto, which he kept in genjutsu in there. I’m just noting that because in “Blood in my veins” I did use that dimension extensively, and some people were apparently a bit… offended by that? But the war arc and the manga do show that he uses it as “storage”. I’m not going the same way as in that other fic, but I might still use it, later.

Chapter 35: Light, under the starry sky

Chapter Text

 

 

 

Tsunade just quirks an eyebrow, the next morning, when he reports Obito’s visit.

Kakashi simply shrugs.

 

She doesn’t question his decision not to even try for an attack even more, just tells him to go and finally reconnect with his team - in a rather firm, but sympathetic voice - and Kakashi turns to do so… with a grimace. 

 

He knows she’s right of course. 

 

They finally got Sasuke back, and even Itachi and this should be enough for a celebration, right?

 

Right.

 

Kakashi scoffs, just quietly, hovering in front of Tsunade’s tent for a moment, before deciding to turn towards the hospital.

The way over leads him through the resurgent market district, and Kakashi cannot help but smile  a little seeing all the little stalls, and all the people, buzzing around, amidst the dozens and dozens sites of constructions.

He inhales, deeply, relaxing the tiniest fraction. If Konoha can come back from such a devastating blow…

The hospital is quiet, most of the injured in Pain’s attack healed by now, and so he simply turns his steps towards the offices, knowing he will find her there.

He debates knocking, but then opens the door to Tsunade’s office silently without, wanting to catch a glimpse of Sakura unawares.

 

She is hunched over the desk, pen in hand, staring into space. There are dark rings under her eyes, and they are dull, matching her exhausted and drawn expression.

He shifts, deliberately making a small noise and her head snaps up, the expression clearing immediately, into careful cheer. 

There is a forced smile on her lips. “Sensei!”

Kakashi hums, stepping into the room. He debates leading a dance of vagueries… but ultimately doesn’t feel like it, deciding to be blunt instead.

He clicks his tongue. “Not how we imagined him coming home, is it?”

She blinks, and something in her expression crumbles, but she smiles again, bravely. “Well, he’s home and safe…” She laughs, a little fake laugh. “Everything else was wishful thinking anyways, was it not?”

Kakashi watches her carefully. “Was it?”

Her lips quivers, and she looks away for a long moment. Her voice is a whisper. “Well, they always were obsessed with each other…”

Kakashi hums. “Two sides of the same coin, yes.” The sun, the moon… and here I am, the darkness. He watches her, fidget under his gaze. And her, the breeze of fresh air, that travels across us all. 

He clears his throat. “To be honest, it has surprised me as well, though.” The speed and intensity with which it happened. He swallows. And it HAS happened, the village is buzzing with rumors right now. Everyone is running their mouths.

Sakura exhales a shuddering breath. “I always thought he and I were destined to be together.” She blinks, bravely raising her eyes to his. “Like you and Naruto.”

Kakashi freezes, for a long moment. And then he sits down on the sofa, his limbs without strength suddenly, his voice carrying his exhaustion. “What makes you say that?”

She sniffs, looking away for a moment. “I… After that discussion at Ichiraku’s I looked up the tattoos once more. I had seen your tattoo before, at the hospital, of course, and… There was a mention of the Sandaime having one that darkened gradually, too, because…” She trails off, fidgeting.

Ah. Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, and then continues her sentence. “Because of the age gap, yes.” He chuckles drily, devoid of any humor. “Yeah, fate can be so funny sometimes.”

She sniffs, rubbing at her nose. “When did you know?”

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head once. “The day he was born.”

He can feel the weight of Sakura’s gaze. 

Her voice is a whisper. “I’m sorry.”

He clears his throat, shaking his head. Thank you, Sakura. “Don’t be. Not your fault. Besides…” He clears his throat again, trying for some kind of levity. “It’s better than Kurenai has it, isn’t it.”

“I guess.” Sakura’s tone is careful. “Still, I mean…” She blushes and he watches her, guessing what’s coming. She is red now, but pushing on, quite bravely. “You have so much more experience than him, and waiting for him like that…”

Kakashi blinks, once, slowly. “The age gap is precisely why I cannot… why I must not interfere with his own… experiences.” He swallows, his throat seemingly closed off. The words come, spilling now, needing to be out. “It’s bad enough that he knows about my feelings now, but I am almost relieved that the bond hasn’t fully engaged yet, at least he won’t be pulled into something he has no frame of reference for by some supernatural wishful… whatever,”, he spreads his arms, tone vicious now, “I mean this bond thing is just this load of bullshit, isn’t it? I told him there is love outside bonds, and I know there fucking is, and this destiny-set lovers thing is such a weird concept anyway, I mean, who gets to decide that? What if the other is living far away? What if you never cross paths?” His voice is dark now, a hiss. “It’s just stupid.”

 

She’s staring at him, with wide eyes, and tears in them. And then she laughs, once, ending in a sob. “It is stupid.”

Kakashi snorts, wiping at his own eyes. “Yeah.”

Sakura sniffs, and then sighs, clearing her throat. “He knows about your feelings?”

Kakashi grimaces, wondering for a split second how he the fuck got into the situation of discussing his feelings with another one of his pupils. Right. I sought her out, wanting to cheer her up. He grimaces. Guess I’ll have to go and discuss them with Sasuke later, just to be fair. He scoffs, picking at a non-existent fluff. 

His tone is gruff. “He sensed them when he was in sage mode, after the fight with Pain.”

Sakura blinks. “Oh.” She looks away for a moment. “Do you think he sensed for you especially?”

Kakashi frowns, and then shakes his head, slowly. “No. He thought I was dead then.” He tilts his head. “Why do you ask?”

She fidgets, looking down at her fingers. “I shouldn’t…” She grimaces, some fire back in her eyes when she looks up. Telling. “Between us, Sensei.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Absolutely.”

She sighs, nodding once. Her tone is careful. “Hinata told me that she told Naruto that she loved him… and he didn’t react at all. After, I mean. Nothing. And now…”

Kakashi nods, grimacing. “That must have been a blow.”

Sakura grimaces, too. “Yeah, but I mean… if he sensed a lot of people’s feelings after…”

Kakashi blinks, following the thought, deciding to tell. “He told me that… “, he clears his throat, “compared to my feelings… he called himself a safe option for her.”

Sakura blinks, looking away for a moment. “I see.” She looks back at him, with a small smile. “So, in another life, maybe.”

He snorts, gently. “Yeah, maybe.” He frowns, with an exhale. “She will find her way.” He hums, adding, softly. “So will you.”

She shrugs, a bit listlessly. 

He straightens up a bit, spreading his arms. “Oh come on. According to fate I should be with Naruto. And yet…” He shrugs, feeling a bit better about it suddenly. “And yet here we are.” He snorts, quipping. “I bet Ibiki is rather annoyed now.”

Her eye snap to his. “Ibiki-san?”

He waves off. “Ah, forget it. They just wanted to… bind the jinchuriki tightly to the village.” He scoffs. “As if you could just put Naruto on a leash.”

 

Sakura snorts. “Wrong summons, definitely.”

There is a pause, and then Kakashi looks at her, with a tilt of his head - and a quirk of his eyebrow. 

Sakura colors, instantly, deeply. Stammering. “I… That is not what I meant, I mean…” She trails off, hiding her face behind her hands. The words come out muffled. “Sorry, Sensei.”

Kakashi laughs soundlessly under his breath, feeling himself relax a bit more. Deciding to tease. “I must say, I haven’t tried puppy play yet, so I cannot really judge…”

Sakura groans, deeply.

Kakashi watches her, with a grin now. “Though I bet Jiraiya would have loved the idea.”

Sakura’s head lowers, to the desk, arms coming up to hide it. Her voice is muffled. “Please stop.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, tone deliberately disappointed. “Shame.”

 

He watches her, watching her head come back up after a moment, defiantly. Still red.

His voice is soft, careful. “You know, you shouldn’t waste your youth waiting for fate to engage… Ignorance can be a blessing. Go and find love outside bonds as well. With or without strings. You don’t need to go full in or all serious, just…” He shakes his head once. “Live. Instead of waiting.”

Sakura sniffs, shaking a bit now. Her voice is small. “Most people seem to raise the bond onto this pedestal, the only form of love that’s valid…”

Kakashi grunts, raising his eyebrows. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but most people are idiots, right?”

Sakura snorts, reaching up to angrily wipe at her eyes. Her voice is vaguely admonishing. “Sensei!”

He chuckles, with a shrug. “You know what I mean. And anyways…” He lowers his voice again, his tone imploring. “This is your life, Sakura-chan. Yours. No-one else can live it. You will need to play the cards you are dealt, but you can also decide to discard some of them… or pick up some more.” He hesitates, and then adds, softly. “God knows I’ve been struggling with this simple fact all my life, I know… but still. It’s a fact.”

She exhales, in a rush, watching him. And nods, once, slowly. “Thank you, Sensei.”

He smiles, softly. Feeling so much lighter than earlier. “No, thank you.”

She shoots him a quick smile, that’s nonetheless true, and he echoes it.

 

There is another pause, but it is a comfortable one, now.

He tilts his head. “That was quite brave of you, to go after Sasuke with a poisoned knife… even if ill-advised.”

She blushes again, looking away. “I wanted to take this burden from him.”

Kakashi blinks, knowing they are both remembering Naruto’s panic attack, there in the snow. “And it was a good call, all things considered.”

She grimaces. “Just that I didn’t wait for you to tell us that Sasuke had defected…“ She groans. “Imagine if I had killed him…” She puts her face into her hands again.

Kakashi hums. “But you didn’t. On the contrary. Your immense knowledge in regards to poisons that you got from Shizune-san has served for you to actually be able to heal him.” He shrugs. “So it all worked out. Differently than anticipated… but still.”

She lowers her hands again, looking at him. “Do you really think it was only the poison?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “It was a lot of things. Smaller things, bigger things. The history of the Uchiha, Orochimaru’s poison, Itachi in… Madara’s grip, Orochimaru’s promise of resurrection, the promise of knowledge…” He sighs. “Sasuke found himself in a corner, whether by his own design or not may be open to debate, but it was something he couldn’t really get out of without help.”

Sakura blinks, her big green eyes filled with tears once more. “And you took the leap of faith.”

Kakashi frowns. “It was mine to take, as your Sensei, Sakura. And if it would have failed… it would have been my responsibility to stop Sasuke, too.” He snorts. “Well, I mean, at least it should have been.”

Sakura snorts as well, with a small grin. “Yeah, well, trust Naruto to knock sense into him through a fight.”

Kakashi hums. “I’m just glad they were able to connect like that. And now. If they get any more powerful… imagine what a fight between them must have resulted in then.” They’d never have survived it unscathed.

Sakura nods, with a grimace. “Indeed.”

 

Kakashi watches her face, watches the small twitches that come with the slight guilt and disappointment. 

His voice is gentle. “You’re very powerful by now, too.”

She cackles, leaning back in her chair. “Not as powerful as they are.”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Differently.” He catches her gaze, lets her see his sincerity. “Do you really think getting trained by Tsunade makes you weak?” He raises an eyebrow. “And besides…” He leans forward. “You can still train with your Sannin Sensei.” He tilts his head. “They can not.”

Sakura quirks an eyebrow, looking away. 

Kakashi smiles, softly. “You cannot compare yourself to them.” She looks at him, frowning, and the smirks softly, carefully holding her gaze. “You and I have something in common they do not have… we do not have a kekkei genkai. True, I have a special summons, but that is a skill, not a genetic modification. And the sharingan, though that is a gift, not mine initially. So while Naruto is a jinchuriki, he is also jinchuriki born, which provided him with certain genetic adaptations… some of which he hasn’t even really tapped into yet I believe. And Sasuke, of course, had the only ‘real’ kekkei genkai, the sharingan.” He tilts his head. “But you, Sakura….” He raises his eyebrows, her eyes huge on his. “You are from a civilian household, and you do not possess their advantage. And yet, here you are, en par with them, trained by a Sannin, well on your way to become one of, if not the strongest kunoichi out there.”

She looks away, her lips pressed together, and he gives her a moment, before continuing softly. “You have managed what no-one believed you could. And I believe you will be incredible when you have stopped channeling chakra into the Hundreds seal. I have not seen the Godaime fight, but I know Jiraiya spoke very highly of her, and we all know what a healer she is. I firmly believe you can surpass her.”

Sakura sniffs. Her voice shivers. “And… what if I do that, what if I become so strong and then…” She trails off.

He frowns, looking at her, and then it clicks and he wants to laugh, but he refrains, gentling his voice instead. “And if you become your personal best, and yet they surpass you?” She nods, and he hums. “That can happen, of course. Might happen, easily.”

She grimaces and turns her face away and he leans forward, elbow on his knees, his tone imploring. “Sakura, there are always bigger fish in the sea.” He tilts his head. “Remember Haku?”

She nods, with a frown.

Kakashi gives her an eye-smile. “Haku would have been unbeatable, if not for his heart.” He chuckles. “When I saw that hunter ninja, back then, my thought was that the three of you were not even comparable.” He grins when she sees the wry smile on her lips. “You three toddlers could not even stand on water then.”

Sakura snorts and he laughs with her, for a moment. 

Sobering slowly. “But seriously, there will always be bigger fish. Those that surpass you, easily. The stronger you get the fewer there are, of course, but there will always be some.” He clicks his tongue, remembering his discussion with Jiraiya. “Sensei Jiraiya told me that run-ins with a… power to hurt him at his level were well-needed lessons in humility.” He tilts his head. “And, you know, that is all there is to it, right?” He leans forward a bit more. “Train, live, try for your best. Maybe you will find a source of power along the way, maybe not.” He exhales, the words grave, but he knows she gets them. “And remember that you are to die.”

 

Sakura is silent for a long, long moment, and then snorts, eyes twinkling. “So your hair does not carry a kekkei genkai?”

Kakashi stares at her for a moment, and then laughs out, loudly. He shakes his head, still chuckling, seeing her grin. “No, who the hell brought up that theory?”

Sakura tilts her head, eyebrows rising. “Naruto actually. He said he had seen Sensei Jiraiya fight with his hair once, and he wondered if yours was the same.”

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head. “No, sorry to disappoint.” He reaches up, pulls at a strand. “Juuuuuuust idiotically strong and defiant light-gray hair from my father’s side.”

Sakura grins at him, and he grins back. 

And then he nods, and pushes up, with a bit of a sigh. “Thank you, Sakura-chan.”

Sakura blinks up at him, and sobers slowly, with a little sniff, her voice suffused with warmth. “No, thank you, Sensei.”

Kakashi hums. He turns towards the door, and then hesitates, looking back at her. “Wanna brave them with me over dinner?”

Sakura grimaces, but then heaves a big sigh. “Well, I guess I’ll have to at some point, right?”

Kakashi snorts, reaching for the door. “Guess we’ll both have to.” He tilts his head back. “7pm, at that small table that serves at Ichiraku’s?”

Sakura sighs again, and then rolls her eyes. “Sure.”

Kakashi nods, stepping out, tone dry. “We’ll survive.”

Sakura snorts again, quietly. 

Kakashi smirks softly, the smirk vaguely painful. 

Promising, somehow.

 

I’ll survive.

 

 

And so will you.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He’s not proud of it, but he has to draw on every ounce of determination, and quite a lot of his Anbu training to stick his head into the tent he knows Sasuke and Naruto are in, and call out to them. With a fake eye-smile and all. “Dinner at Ichiraku’s in 30 minutes, my treat.”

He hastily retreats, without really looking, only hearing Naruto’s ‘whoohoo’, followed by a soft and carried on a laugh ‘teme’.

 

Kakashi swallows, willing his stomach to quiet the fuck down, and turns his feet toward the tent he knows Tenzou is in.

Guarding Itachi. 

 

Who has been a model prisoner, all things considered. 

 

Kakashi knows that both Naruto and Sasuke have been by. He knows they talked, about inconsequential things. He knows Naruto is officially ‘guarding’ Sasuke in his own tent. He knows Itachi is only slowly gaining back his strength. 

He also knows Itachi carries another pair of eyes. 

He wonders if Sasuke has Itachi’s. 

 

He sighs, entering the tent.

 

Kakashi nods at Tenzou, who stretches and steps out with a thankful nod, his soft steps fading in direction of the field kitchen, and Kakashi pulls up a seat, watching as Itachi pulls himself up into a sitting position, slowly.

 

Itachi blinks at him, the dark eyes huge.

Kakashi nods at him, tone carefully soft. “So, whose eyes are you carrying now?” Itachi blinks again, and Kakashi continues, with a click of a tongue. “Sasuke is wearing yours, isn’t he.”

Itachi nods. His voice is rough, obviously rather unused. “Yes. I gave them to him. Voluntarily.”

Kakashi blinks. “Why?”

There is a twitch on Itachi’s face that could, or could not be a small smile. “Don’t you know?”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away for a moment. “Using the sharingan results in blindness?”

The smile is actually visible on Itachi’s lips this time. “Very good, Senpai.”

A shiver runs through Kakashi at the title. He clears his throat. “Why does exchanging the eyes help with that though?”

Itachi shrugs, once. “We think it is because the nerves have to connect anew, the new connection not carrying the strain.” He tilts his head. “You have noticed it already?”

Kakashi grimaces, and then exhales, in a rush. “Yes… though it is only the beginning, I believe. Sometimes when I use it, there is a moment of… fuzziness, but I can blink it away.”

Itachi hums. “It will get worse. I believe you are only not blind yet because you did not use it your whole life… you always kept it closed and covered for long periods because of the drain… but that actually helped in regards to the wear.”

Kakashi sighs, with a frown. “But exchanging them… don’t you get a new skillset?”

Itachi smirks softly. “Yes and no. When you awaken them the brain learns of the skills. If you replace your… tool, the brain will try to apply the knowledge. Usually the brain is able to adapt to what it knows. Sometimes learn something new.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “I see.”

Itachi tilts his head, just a bit. “Why are you here, Senpai? To debrief me?”

Kakashi hesitates, and then shakes his head, slowly. He stares at the ground, unseeing. “No. While I believe we will have to… discuss a lot of what happened, and what you did… I…” He trails off, grimacing. And then shrugs. “I actually came to invite you to dinner.”

Itachi blinks. “Dinner?”

Kakashi shoots him a look. “You must remember Ichiraku’s.”

Itachi tilts his head. “The standard rations I get here are very sufficient for a prisoner though.”

Kakashi nods. And clicks his tongue. “Yeah, well, but…” He looks at Itachi. “Both the Godaime and I know that you were used back then.” He hesitates, trying to read the dark eyes locked to his now. “I did not know how to help you then, but…” He smiles softly, letting the truth color his voice. “But I sure as hell will try now.”

Itachi blinks, rapidly, looking away. “I… thank you, Senpai.”

Kakashi clears his throat, nodding. “Sure.”

 

They are silent for a moment, the pause heavy and yet light at the same time, both remembering.

Itachi breaks it, eventually. “Seeing them must hurt you.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he snorts. “No shit.”

Itachi looks at him, from the corner of his eyes. “Why do you let it happen?”

Kakashi works his jaw, and then looks at Itachi, tone dry. “Why do you let it happen?”

Itachi stares at him, for a long moment. His voice is low when he speaks, obviously following his own train of thought. “Experiencing love is good for him. He will grow through it. It will gentle his soul. Repair some of the damage to it… the damage I inflicted on him. No matter what will happen… I know Naruto won’t break his heart.” He blinks, tilting his head. “And you… you will support them, let them make their own experiences. Because it is the right thing to do. You won’t hurt them. ”

Kakashi’s voice is a broken whisper. “No. I won’t.”

Itachi smiles at him, gently. “I am proud to call you Senpai still.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, the tear falling silently. He snorts, darkly. “Damn you.”

Itachi grins, softly. And then holds out his hand for Kakashi to pull him up. “And I’ll happily come to Ichiraku’s tonight to serve as a buffer.”

Kakashi groans, pulling him up carefully. “So, I see nothing gets past you still.”

Itachi chuckles, and then sobers, staring down at their linked hands. “I never would have thought there was a chance…”

He falls silent, but Kakashi can hear the unspoken words. Never would have thought that there was a chance I could come home, after all that I’ve done.

He squeezes Itachi’s hand, and then drops it, gently, reaching for the blanket that is laying on a chair next to the bed, putting it around Itachi’s shoulders, carefully. He smiles softly. “Me neither, to be honest. But…” He laughs once, softly. “Naruto has changed a lot of things.”

Itachi blinks, voice suffused with light humor. “Do not sell yourself short, Senpai. Sasuke has told me of your promise to drag him back and cuddle him.” He looks away for a moment, before his eyes return to Kakashi’s. “It has helped him through a lot of dark times.”

Kakashi’s tone is gruff. “Yeah, well, little as it actually changed things though.”

 

Itachi hums, turning towards the exit. He shoots a look over his shoulder. “Sometimes, Senpai, a spark is enough.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto and Sasuke are already there, with Sakura and Sai, standing there, silently, in a stiff little group off to the side. Staring at each other. Mutely.

Kakashi grimaces. Oh, this is already overdue. If we let this fester further…

He inhales deeply, exchanging a quick glance with Itachi before addressing them. “Glad to see you’re here already… I’m starving.” 

All eyes snap to his, and he grimaces, fidgeting a bit. 

Itachi blinks, drawing the blanket more tightly around himself. Shivers, for effect. “Maybe we should sit down.”

Sasuke starts, and then hurries over, escorting a suddenly extremely frail Itachi over to the six seats clustered around a wooden table serving as a restaurant right now. 

Kakashi blinks, carefully schooling his expression.

Sakura grimaces a bit, and then steps over, seeming to hesitate for a long, long moment, and then seating herself two seats over from Itachi.

Kakashi narrows his eyes, wondering at that moment of hesitance. Don’t you want to sit next to them? Why? He sighs, taking the free seat, giving her a deliberate eye-smile. Which she doesn’t return, her expression pinched. Kakashi grimaces, resolving himself to talk to her, later. 

He looks over to Sai, who lowers himself to the seat next to her, Naruto taking the last free one, between him and Sasuke. Across from Kakashi.

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long moment. 

 

Itachi’s drawl pulls him out of his thoughts. “Coming home also means that one has to find your place again…” He hesitates, and then looks around the table, his gaze stopping on Sakura for a long second. Kakashi frowns, but Itachi continues before he can think on it more. “The dynamics of friendship and kinship shift continuously.” He frowns, looking back at Sasuke, who is watching him, silently. “For the first time in a long time, I am looking forward to the future. And so should you.”

Kakashi blinks, swallowing down his emotions. His tone is gruff, knowing Itachi knows what he is implying. “Despite everything?”

Itachi looks back at him, tone calm. “Because of everything.”

Sai tilts his head, drawing all their attention. “We shape our own fates.” He blinks when he sees their expressions. “Naruto taught me that.” Sai’s eyes lock with Kakashi’s for a long moment, while Naruto blushes a bit, with a small smile. “And not everything turns out as we anticipate it.”

Sakura snorts. “No shit.” She colors, deeply, mumbling at the chuckles her comment elicit. “Sorry.”

Kakashi hums, reaching up to clasp her shoulder. “Don’t be.” He snorts, too, and the raises his gaze to Sasuke’s, with an effort. Repeating, in his mind. I’m a better man. He nods at him, and then looks over to Naruto for a moment, before returning his gaze to Sasuke. “I’m happy for you two.”

Sasuke blinks, very slowly, and the carefully kept mask of indifference becomes a very big crack. “You are?” 

Out of the corner of his eyes, Kakashi can see Naruto shift. And then smile, softly, proudly. He sighs, through his nose, and then nods. “I am.” He hesitates, and then continues speaking, past the constriction in his throat. “I am glad that you are back, Sasuke.” He blinks, realizing it’s the truth, too. He shoots a look at Itachi, the words coming easier now, now that he’s said them. “I am glad you are back, too, Itachi.” He hesitates, and then quips, gently. “Finally someone else with sharingans. I was growing tired of people staring at me.”

Naruto snorts, and then giggles. He waggles his eyebrows, tone and eyes carefully chipper. “No, they stare at you because you’re reading porn in public, Sensei.”

There’s chuckles around the table. 

Sai’s tone is dry. “And bad porn at that.”

Kakashi stares at him, and then exclaims “Hey!” rather indignantly - in unison with Naruto. They stare at each other for a moment, and then chuckle, truly this time, and it breaks the tension, Sakura and Sasuke chiming in, too. 

Itachi bumps into him, on purpose, very gently, and Kakashi looks at him, with a quirk of an eyebrow. 

The corners of Itachi’s eyes crinkle, just a bit. “Let’s eat, Senpai.”

Naruto exclaims, loudly. “Oh yes, I’m starved.”

Sasuke snorts, the sound somehow filled to the brim with affection. “You always are, usuratonkachi.”

Sakura laughs out loudly, pointing a finger. “Oh, you should have seen him after the other bells test… Naruto ate SEVEN bowls of ramen that evening.”

Laughter around the table, while Naruto just shrugs, expression carrying a deliberate pout. “I was hungry?”

Sai’s tone is dry, though there is a bit of envy in it, too. “I don’t know where he puts it.”

Sakura groans, nodding gravely, pulling a face. “Me neither. It’s not fair.”

Naruto sniffs, haughtily. “I knew it. You’re just jealous.”

Sakura glowers at him, mockingly. “Yes.”

Sasuke chuckles, under his breath. 

 

And Kakashi sniffs, a weight he didn’t know he carried dropping off his soul, despite the bittersweet pain that runs through his veins. Burns, with every breath he takes.

He raises his hand and signals for their food, and exhales, looking up to the sky.

Next to him, Itachi follows his gaze, and then sends him an inquiring look. His voice is soft. “Hopes? Or memories?”

Kakashi hums, knowing Naruto understands, and he shrugs, keeping his eyes on the stars. And the moon. “There’s a full moon tonight. It illuminates us with its light.” He blinks, slowly, lowering his gaze to lock with blue. His voice is a whisper. “It’s a beautiful, starry night... and the sun is at rest.”

Naruto’s lip quivers, and then he laughs, wiping his eyes, looking up at Teuchi as he brings the ramen over, and his eyes sparkle, and Kakashi exhales, deeply. 

 

Coming with a thought.

 

And if this is everything that will be between us… 

 

He looks at Sasuke, whose eyes glow when he looks at Naruto. And then at Naruto, whose nose scrunches with a grin, his eyes blue fire. 

 

… it has to be enough.

 

 

 

Right?

 

 

 

Sakura reaches for his hand, squeezes it, for a moment.

Itachi’s hand squeezes his shoulder.

 

 

And Kakashi smiles.

Just the tiniest bit forced. 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto and Sasuke escort Itachi back, and Kakashi watches them leave, feeling remote somehow, mellow.

The dinner had been filled with laughter, and smiles, and stories - careful, easy stories, all of them aware of the need to tread lightly - and the ramen had been exceptional, and Naruto had eaten SIX bowls once more, and Kakashi chuckles softly at the memory of Sasuke’s flabbergasted expression, and his dry comment that he’d thought Sakura had made a joke. 

To the whole table laughing, loudly. 

 

Sakura’s gaze is warm, understanding and… weird.

Kakashi frowns, sharing a look with Sai, who shrugs.

 

Kakashi nods at him. “Thank you for joining us tonight, Sai.”

Sai smiles, a smile that almost looks normal. “Thank you for including me, Senpai. A shame that Sensei Yamato couldn’t join.”

Kakashi nods, but clicks his tongue. “I know he was in a hurry to get back to…” He trails off, not quite sure suddenly, if the relationship with Yugao is common knowledge. He shrugs.

Sai’s eyebrow rises. “I do know of his relationship with Yugao.”

“Ah.” Kakashi nods. “Right. Thank you for confirming.”

Sai blinks, seemingly on the verge of saying something else, but Sakura elbows him into the side, and they stare at each other, for a long moment. Sai shrugs, eventually. “Good night, Sensei.”

Kakashi sighs, watching Sakura a bit warily. “Good night, Sai.”

 

They watch Sai leave and Kakashi turns to Sakura, with a quirked eyebrow. “So?”

She groans, and then lopes her elbow through his, dragging him along. Energetically. 

Kakashi blinks. “Anything on your mind?”

She stops, in the middle of the street, breathing heavily. And then her green eyes look up to him, wide, and unblinking. Her voice sounds small, brittle. “I think it’s him.”

Kakashi blinks again. “Him?” He frowns. “Sasuke?”

Her eyes fill with tears. She shakes her head, wildly, lips quivering. 

Kakashi frowns, staring at her. “What do you m…” Oh. His mouth drops open. “Oh.”

Sakura cackles, harshly, tears running down her face now. “Sensei, I don’t know what to do, all this time I thought I was… pining after Sasuke, but then I was close to Itachi for the first time, you know, truly close, closer than back then when we went after Gaara, right, but I mean, he was using someone else than anyways, and so my stomach churned, and the world dropped away, and the tattoo burned, and everything tingles, and I cannot seem to think, and I…” She drops off, crying now, openly. 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, and then sighs, quietly, drawing her into a firm embrace. He mumbles into her hair. “You had a tattoo done?”

She nods against his chest, still shaking with sobs. Her voice is wobbly. “Yes, for my fifteenth birthday… My father was against it, but my mom came with me, she said she could understand the need to know, and I…” She sniffs, laughing once. “I was so disappointed when I returned to Konoha after I went after Sasuke… I was so sure it was him? And the tattoo stayed red, and I stared at it for long hours in the mirror, hating it…” She laughs again, the sobs quieting a bit. “I actually went and did a test in the hospital, just before you came to me, you know. A chemical test, I wanted to know if they had applied the correct ink.”

Kakashi hums, stroking her hair. “And now it’s black?” 

Sakura snorts. “I actually don’t know. It’s on my shoulder.” She sniffs, looking up at him. “Would you check?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, but nods. “Sure.” He tilts his head. “Let’s go somewhere more private though, hmm?”

She blushes and nods, and then steps back, angrily wiping at her eyes.

Kakashi watches her, mind weirdly silent. He makes his tone very gentle. “If it helps, I think Itachi felt it, too.”

She gasps a laugh, starting down the path again, and he falls into step with her. “You think?”

He nods, sighing through his nose. “Yes. There was this moment…” He smiles, carefully. “Congratulations, Sakura-chan… you recognized the bond.”

She is silent for a moment, and then sniffs. “If I’m not mistaken.”

He hums, following her to her house. “We will see.”

 

She nods, and they are silent until they reach her home in the outskirts, one of the few still standing, Sakura signaling him to be quiet, the house already dark. He follows her, feeling definitely out of place in her carefully kept and very clean room, no posters or flowers in sight anywhere, just a single pot of a plant that seems vaguely familiar. 

She blushes softly, but turns, reaching up to unzip her tunic-like vest, slipping it off one shoulder. Kakashi blinks and then looks at the tattoo of a sakura flower on her shoulder blade, the lines sharp and in stark contrast. And black.

He reaches up to hover his fingertips over it for a long moment, and then blinks, stepping around her. He reaches up, to wipe a silent tear away. “You’re not mistaken.”

Sakura’s face crumbles, as if in slow motion.

Kakashi sighs, and draws her into another embrace, gently rocking her. He clicks his tongue, repeating the words. “See. It’s stupid.”

She snorts, and then cackles. “It is.”

Kakashi sighs, stroking her hair, and looking at the room, unseeing. “You will be alright.”

Her tone is caustic, muffled into his by now quite wet vest. “Will I?”

He hums, weighing his head, and then carefully infuses his tone with humor. “Loot at it this way. You’ll get your Uchiha, and you’ll be family to Sasuke.” He pushes her back, just slightly, to look at her eyes, serious again. “Just promise me to take your time.” 

She snorts, wiping at her nose. “Well, yeah but at least I don’t have to wait after all.”

Kakashi grunts. “No. But don’t go in fully serious yet either. Live a little. Get to know him first, let it engage first.”

She grimaces, fidgeting. “What if he wants to go serious already?”

Kakashi shakes his head, once. “This is your life, Sakura. Live it as you see fit.” He chuckles, looking away for a moment. “Besides. I’ve known Itachi longer than you have… I know he is likely yearning for love, but he would never force you.” He frowns, knowing the truth of it. “So just… let it develop? And don’t feel guilty if you want to have fun, too?”

She colors, deeply. Shuffling her feet. 

Kakashi clicks his tongue. Drawling. “I see.” Her gaze snaps up, like a deer in headlights. He grins at her. “Wanna to tell me who?” 

She looks away, biting her lips. And then giggles, beet red, but her eyes find his, defiantly. “Neji.”

Kakashi’s eyes climb up to his hairline. “Neji???”

Sakura giggles, hands hiding her face. “I know, right, but it…” She shrugs. “It just happened. Hinata was visiting her father with Hanabi, he was alone, I came by to visit…”

Kakashi smirks, and then nods. Citing Itachi. “And sometimes a spark is enough.”

She ducks her head, pulling the vest closed again. “Yeah, well, we both know it‘s nothing serious, but…” She blushes again, heavily. 

Kakashi laughs, breathlessly. “Well, I’m glad that worked out.”

Sakura groans, hiding her face again, but sighs, deeply. “Oh yes.”

Kakashi loughs out, loudly, and Sakura shushes him, immediately, eyes sparkling. “Shhhh. My parents don’t know, and I really don’t want them to, either.”

Kakashi grins, making a silent motion to lock his mouth and throwing away the key. And then he draws Sakura into an embrace, again. Whispering, only loud enough for her to hear. “I’m very happy for you. And proud of you.”

Sakura exhales, and squeezes back, for a moment. “Thank you, Sensei.”

And then she withdraws, with a grimace. “You need to put on a new uniform.”

Kakashi laughs, gently, and then steps back, with a playful bow. “And that is my cue.” He winks at her. “See you tomorrow, Sakura-chan.” He hesitates, and then gives her a very deliberate eye-smile. “And sweet dreams.”

 

He leaves her, vanishing, the impression of her relieved and excited and wobbly little grin following him into his own dreams, lighting them up, beautifully. 

 

When he wakes up in the morning the pain that has eaten at him ever since that moment is buried low, deeply, confined and tightly and safely doused by affection and awareness and… love.

 

He blinks, staring at Mr. Ukki 1 and 2.

 

 

There’s love outside bonds.

 

 

He reaches out to trace the leaves, gently. 

 

 

There really is.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

His feet carry him to the Hyuuga complex the next day, the outer parts of it still standing, the parts towards the town center obviously being rebuilt right now.

He watches Neji and Lee work, for a long moment, his gaze drifting over to Hinata and Tenten, who are bent over construction plans, deep in conversation. 

He watches as Tenten looks at Hinata, with a blush.

Watches as Hinata grins at her, oblivious. 

 

Kakashi blinks, and then smirks to himself, quirking an eyebrow. 

There is a sense of movement, and then Neji comes over, clapping his hands to get rid of the dust. “Sensei Kakashi.”

Kakashi nods at him, and then at the others, before turning towards Neji. “Don’t let me interrupt you. I was just coming over because I heard that you…” He stomps on the impulse to refer to Sakura. “…have been guarding Karin and Suigetsu.”

Neji nods, waving at Lee to continue, before answering. “Yes, but they have been marked with a seal limited to the village limits, making an active guard unnecessary.”

Kakashi hums. “I see.” He tilts his head. “What do you think of them?”

Neji weighs his head. “Suigetsu has a sharp humor and he loves riling Karin up. He seems neutral, in regards to his allegiance… he is one of Orochimaru’s experiments as well, but he doesn’t seem to carry too much of a grudge, obviously deciding to look ahead instead. Karin is an Uzumaki, as you know, she lost her mother while they were fleeing the destruction. She is quite bitter at times, hiding it with bursts of temper.” He hesitates, his large eyes finding Kakashi’s. “She has very unique abilities. I’m not sure whether she can employ the Uzumaki chains, but she told me the bite marks come through her kekkei-genkai, the ability to heal through letting someone bite her.”

Kakashi grimaces. “By the amount of scars on her I believe she was used.” A lot.

Neji nods, his gaze faraway for a moment. “Yes. Abused, too.” He sighs, softly. “I can emphasize with her anger.” There is something in his tone Kakashi cannot place. 

Kakashi blinks, looking at him. He keeps his tone soft. “You like her.”

Neji shrugs, blinking a few times. He clears his throat and then clicks his tongue. “She has told me of the village that was destroyed.” He looks up at Kakashi. “If we survive the coming war… I believe I would like to see it.”

Kakashi frowns, with a sigh. “She remembers it?” That would mean she is much oder than she seems, though, for an Uzumaki that’s quite possible…

Neji shakes his head. “No. But her mother apparently told her lots and lots of stories.” He grimaces. “They… apparently used her up.” Kakashi grimaces. Neji continues, definite heat in his words now. “They wanted to do that to her, too, but she fled. Orochimaru found her. And then Sasuke took her along.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “I see.” He frowns. “At the conference they said something of a Jugo?”

Neji nods, watching Hinata direct Lee now. “Yes. Supposedly, he likes the wilderness. They both said they expect Jugo to go and find himself a cave somewhere in the woods.” He shrugs.

Kakashi nods. “Alright.”

Neji shoots him a look. “Are you making your rounds to check in with all of us before the war hits?”

Kakashi grins, a bit painfully, shooting him a deliberate eye-smile. “That transparent?”

Neji weighs his head. “Just something I would expect of you.” There’s a note of teasing in his voice now. “Asuma-san always said that your integrity was only surpassed by your hotness.”

Kakashi laughs out loud, snorting heavily, despite the lance of pain at the memory. “Oh god, I can literally hear that.”

Neji grins, and then inclines his head, sobering. “Will you check on Kurenai and Mirai, too?”

Kakashi nods. “And Konohamaru, yes.” He exhales, and then reaches up, to pull Neji into a one-arm embrace for just a moment. “You all grew up so fine. I’m proud of you.”

Neji sniffs, and then grins. “We have fine teachers.”

Kakashi nods, squeezing his shoulder before he drops his arm again. “Oh yes, you do have the best.” He raises his eyebrows. “Where is Guy-san?”

Neji hums. “Helping to rebuild the market district. He said it was excellent training.”

Kakashi nods. “That it is.”

Neji sighs, looking back at Tenten, who is yelling at Lee not to do one-finger push-ups between hammering in nails, even if he is bored. “I should get back to work. Keeping Lee busy is a task by itself.”

Kakashi chuckles. “I can imagine.”

 

He watches him go, shooting another look at Tenten and Hinata, grinning to himself.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

All in all he shouldn’t be surprised, but he actually is, when Sasuke finds him, a bit later.

Sans Naruto.

Kakashi blinks, scanning the area around him, before refocusing on the raven-haired young man walking next to him.

He clicks his tongue. Desperately tries to keep his tone light. “Is Naruto procuring food?”

Sasuke snorts, shooting him a look. His tone is sharp, but there’s humor in it, too, and Kakashi has the feeling the sharpness is a remnant, something used for so long it’s hard to let go. “He’s watering his plants. Talking to them.”

Kakashi chuckles, helplessly. Shooting him a knowing look. “And you fled?”

Sasuke blinks, almost innocently. Tone deadpan. “I wanted to stretch my legs.”

“Mhhh hmmm.” Kakashi cannot help himself, he grins, and lets it show, too. He inhales, feeling for the pain, but it’s off somewhere, subdued. 

Sasuke looks at him, knowingly. “This must be hard for you.”

And just like that, some of the pain is back. Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. “How come you’ve always known?” He scoffs. “Am I really that transparent?”

Sasuke hums, and then shrugs. “Probably because you’ve always known, too?”

Kakashi hesitates, and then nods, and shrugs, too. “Probably.” The thought is not without humor. And look here I am, discussing my feeling with the last of my students… fair’s fair.

They’re silent for a long moment. 

 

And then Sasuke sighs, deeply. “I know he’s not my soul-mate.” He blinks, his dark eyes staring right into Kakashi’s soul. “He’s yours, isn’t he.”

Kakashi smiles, painfully, bitterly, the pain ebbing and flowing now. “I…” He stops, in the middle of what serves as the street, turning towards Sasuke. Knowing he has to be blunt, the words choking him. “Sasuke, he hasn’t recognized the bond yet. And… what he feels for you is real.” Has always been real. He hesitates. “I… don’t know what the future will bring. But I…” He blinks, rapidly. “But I know that he is feeling guilty for loving you and me and I…” He grimaces, fidgeting a bit. He shakes his head. “I don’t want him to?” He sighs, realizing it’s the truth, too. “I want him to be happy, to love, to…” He trails off. 

Sasuke swallows, throat clicking. Tone gruff. “So what. I should just ignore that he will be yours?”

Kakashi scoffs, and then shakes his head. “Sasuke, Naruto is no thing to be had.” He quirks an eyebrow. “And you know it.” Sasuke looks away, a bit guiltily, and Kakashi shakes his head again, looking away as well. “We should probably…” He shrugs. “Enjoy what he gives us?”

Sasuke sniffs. 

 

Kakashi snorts, quoting, once more, sounding tired to his own ears. “There’s love outside bonds.”

Sasuke exhales, deeply. “That’s what he says, too.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. Keeps his tone light once more with an effort. “Just know that if you hurt him I will have your hide.” And I mean it, too.

Sasuke looks away, clearing his throat. With a smile. “Understood.”

Kakashi nods to himself, and then starts walking again, something green and youthfully energetic off to the side. “Good.”

 

 

They are silent for a few minutes, each dwelling on their respective words.

Eventually, Sasuke speaks again, tone carefully neutral. “I still need to thank Sakura properly for drawing all the poison out… it was eating me up from the inside. They had injected me with several doses of it when they abducted me. Afterwards… it was like a dream, for a long, long time. I watched myself doing things, but I couldn’t really interfere.”

Kakashi nods, sighing softly. “Yeah, they found the snakes. I believe it may be one of the reasons why you’re allowed to roam freely right now.”

Sasuke grimaces. “And I appreciate it.”

Kakashi hums, watching his profile for a long moment. “You stayed with him after his resurrection because he promised to resurrect your family, too, didn’t you?”

Sasuke nods, silently, expression glum. His words are a whisper. “I… when I saw that he actually could… I…” He trails off.

Kakashi hums again, inhaling deeply. “Don’t be too hard on yourself. The temptation to see those we miss once more…” He shakes his head. “This temptation has turned stronger shinobi than you, Sasuke.”

Sasuke frowns, looking away. His tone is sullen. “Really?”

Kakashi smirks grimly, thinking of Tsunade and Obito. “Really.”

 

“Sasuke! Stop running away from me!”

 

They both stop at hearing Naruto’s call, and Kakashi braces himself for the emotional impact, lessened and made much, much worse in equal measure by the sight of Sasuke’s face lighting up, like the sun, at seeing him.

Sasuke’s voice is breathless. “Teme. We were just walking.”

Naruto skids to a halt in front of him, eyes glowing, his gaze flitting to Kakashi for a split second, before returning to Sasuke’s. He grins. “You just didn’t want to listen to me talk to someone else.”

Sasuke quirks an eyebrow. “Something.”

Naruto chuckles. 

 

And then Sasuke leans forward, kissing Naruto, just like that, and Kakashi stares, unable not to, watches as the grin broadens and then shifts, the lips adapting to receive the kiss fully, to return it, Naruto’s head tilting to deepen it, a breathy laugh precipitating another shift…

And suddenly there’s tongues involved, and they’re embracing now, and Kakashi rips his gaze away, his heart thundering, in his ears, in his throat, in the pressure of his eyes. 

 

Their afterimage burns in his brain, sizzles, a laser focus of pain that incinerates his carefully built defenses, crumbling them to dust. 

 

Instantly.

 

The world is a tunnel suddenly, and he vanishes, with the last of his strength, falling to his knees with a gasp on a rooftop somewhere in the outskirts, no breath, no breath, no breath, and he falls down, eyes unseeing on his fingers, scratching at the cool stone under his skin until they bleed.

 

 

And then darkness.

 

 

 

Blessed darkness, twisting and dragging him down. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Guy is with him, when consciousness returns.

Wrapping his fingers in bandages.

 

Guy’s voice is low, without the usual exuberance. “You should not suppress your feelings so deeply, my friend.”

Kakashi sits up without dislodging his hands from Guy’s, with a grunt, tone gravelly. “And here I thought I was doing so well.”

Guy hums. “To an outsider, maybe.”

Kakashi snorts, looking away. He swallows, exhaling in a rush. “Tenzou once told me that Yugao was afraid that the bond might backfire.”

Guy quirks an eyebrow, releasing his hand with a final check of the wrap. “And, does it?”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long, long moment, suddenly utterly and truly exhausted. “I don’t know. I just try to do the right thing.” He blinks, very slowly. “Sora told me back then, that I wasn’t aware of what that would mean.” He snorts. “She might have been right.” He shoots Guy a look. “Compared to now that thing with Shion was easy…”

Guy hums, settling next to him. His eyes carry a lot of sympathy. “Because it didn’t mean much outside the physical.”

Kakashi’s voice is a whisper, tearing at him. “I saw the way his face changed when he looked at Sasuke, Guy, I…”

Guy is silent for a moment. “Does he know?”

Kakashi frowns, looking at his hands “Of the bond? No.” But he told me that he loves me… that has to count for something, right?

Guy looks at him. “Why? Tenzou has told me that the seal released?”

Kakashi laughs, bitterly, eyes unseeing now. “Yes, and I told him we’d talk when we’d be back, you know, and then…”

Guy nods. “And then Sasuke happened.”

Kakashi swallows. “Yes.” He snorts, devoid of any humor. “Sasuke knows, though.” He inhales, through his teeth. “But hat doesn’t help the matter.”

Guy tilts his head. “Why?”

Kakashi cackles. “Because I decided to be a better man.”

Guy leans forward slightly, prompting, softly. “Than?”

Kakashi tilts his head, raises his eye to his. “Than I feel like being.” Than I want to be. 

Guy nods, and then looks away again, up at the Hokage heads. His tone is soft. “War will happen soon.”

Kakashi swallows, staring at his wrapped hands. “Another one, yes.” Pain and death and mourning. He sighs. “Without them, though.” He shoots Guy a look. “And without you and Tenzou, and Aoba. And a few others, probably.” And I’m grateful for that. To have you all safe.

Guy quirks an eyebrow. “Why?”

Kakashi exhales, in a rush. “You will accompany Naruto to meet with Killer-B on some kind of secret island. He will need to find a way to come to terms with his bijou.” He clicks his tongue. “Maybe learn how to control it.”

Silence, for a few long seconds.

And then Guy sighs, but with a smirk. “I will direct the fires of my youth to protect the love of your life then once more. The unleashing of the gates can wait.”

Kakashi swallows. “Remember you promised I would be there.” I cannot lose you, too. 

I cannot. 

 

Guy looks at him, and then grins, broadly. “Promise.”

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 36: Prison of blood and despair

Notes:

References to the Chicara filler arc, but only using some details of it, to change it for my use.

Chapter warning: implied/mentioned … molesting (I’ll leave it at that), built on the movie “Blood Prison“. They insinuate heavily there - I‘m not going graphic, just… talking, after the events. (Which is bad enough). And working with the… repercussions.
(The movie is mentioned in the canon Kakashi Hiden novel, which makes it the “most” canon of the movies (apart from “The Last”), btw, something I always found interesting.)

Also: I would like to point out, that I don’t want to hate on Tsunade (or Kakashi) here. Sometimes… you make bad calls for the right reasons (right, Sasuke, Sandaime…). Or through a sense of loyalty. Or emotions, directing you. And you think you do the right thing.
>> I will explore this aspect further, a bit down “the road”. Because I think it is important for the kind of Hokages that both Kakashi and Naruto are to become.

(So, one last hit for them and then… ^^)

 

EDIT (Sept. 4th, 2022): Added art by the beautiful Anannua, who wanted to see them cuddle there, at the end. 💕

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

The village in the area known as Hachō Village, nestled into ‘the hole’ looks peaceful from afar… and beautiful.

 

Kakashi shoots a look at Naruto, and Sakura, who are working together easily once more, and had been even joking, before they’d split up.

He is glad that Naruto seems to be relaxed now, and at ease, despite being here… sans Sasuke. 

Despite having thrown something very similar to a temper tantrum when told he had to leave.

 

Kakashi had seen the look with which Tsunade had leveled Naruto.

It had even made him wince.

 

The thought is glum now, watching Naruto press for the mission to continue, to finish this, soon.

You’re infatuated, deeply. Beyond the pull that is between you, and him, you are deeply in love right now, high on endorphins and taste and smell… and possibility. 

 

He swallows, pushing the unnamed and deliberately unacknowledged feeling coming with the thought down, deep down, scanning for Tenzou and Sai, but there’s nothing out of the ordinary to be felt.

Kakashi frowns. Nothing out of the ordinary at all. Nothing much either. It’s as if the whole area is holding its breath.

He opens his mouth to tell his once-upon-a-time cute little genins to come with him into the village when the foliage shifts and a cough can be heard.

 

A cough, dry and repeating. 

 

And known.

 

Oh no.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Hayate is still good, even in death, giving them all a run for their money.

 

Of course it’s a nuisance that the half-snaked Kabuto is helping him.

 

And it’s obviously Kabuto who defiled the graves then. 

The one directing the Dead.

 

Kakashi grimaces, using a kunai to deflect Hayate’s blow. 

For a moment their eyes catch, the black eyes seemingly soulless, but sparking with life suddenly.

“Kakashi.”

Kakashi jumps back, raises the kunai to deflect another blow. “Hayate.”

Hayate blinks, whirling around to keep Naruto and Sakura at a distance. 

Kakashi frowns, signaling them to go after Kabuto, while jumping out of reach of the whirling sword. He hisses when the tip of it just scratches through his vest. “Hayate, can you stop?”

Hayate grunts, jabbing at him. “I can not, I’m sorry.”

Kakashi nods, grimly, and then falls into full defensive stance, only deflecting.

 

His eyes lock with Hayate’s again, for a moment. His voice is soft. “You have a daughter.” 

Hayate smiles, broadly, while trying to put the sword through Kakashi’s jugular. “I know.” He blinks, slipping around and turning, and Kakashi falls to his knees to deflect. “I was at peace. Put me back to peace, Kakashi.”

Kakashi grunts, pushing back up, and kicking at the hand holding the sword, making Hayate stagger back. “I’ll try.” He frowns, remembering his own thoughts on the matter, the promise the afterlife had held, even for him. Especially for him. “You don’t want to go back to her? To the bond?”

Hayate grunts, whirling around, and their blades connect, with a loud clang. “I’m dead. The bond is broken.”

Kakashi swallows, moving in, gripping the hand holding the sword. “But she still longs.”

Hayate blinks, and then jumps back, jabbing at Kakashi. “But I thought she and…”

Kakashi dances sideways, deflecting the blow. “Yes. They are a couple.” He twirls around, jumping out of reach. “And they do each other good.”

Hayate exhales, while describing a circle with the sword, that Kakashi ducks under. “I see.” Hayate grunts, twisting the sword and slicing down, taking a few tips of Kakashi’s hair with it. “So she hasn’t acknowledged it’s broken.”

Kakashi frowns, pushing up, scratching his kunai along the edge. “Acknowledged it’s broken?”

Hayate smiles, painfully, the black and yellow eyes full of awareness for a moment. “Only death can break bonds.”

Kakashi whispers, deflecting the next jab. Repeating. “But I thought the longing stays?”

Hayate grunts, trying to pull the sword in, to cut Kakashi’s throat. “If you let it.” 

Kakashi grimaces, and then reaches up to grab the handle, twisting the sword out of Hayate’s hands, hissing in annoyance, when Hayate’s fingers crack. 

Hayate cackles, while reaching for a kunai with his other hand. “Don’t worry about it, Kakashi. I do not feel pain.”

Kakashi grunts, throwing the sword behind himself. 

Intercepting Hayate’s kunai with his own once more. “Hayate we need to end this, soon. Anything you want to tell her?”

Hayate blinks, eyes shifting to the commotion at the edge of the clearing, where Naruto and Kabuto are still fighting. “Tell her I love her.” He grunts, his gaze returning to Kakashi’s. “And then give her my katana and tell her to acknowledge it.”

Kakashi pushes his weight against their connected kunais. “Anything else.”

Hayate coughs a laugh, and then grimaces, as some of the life leaves his eyes. Kakashi can see Kabuto weave a sign from the corner of his eyes. 

Hayate’s voice is a whisper. “Please stop me.”

 

And Hayate jumps back and away, and so does Kabuto and Kakashi stands there, knowing he should follow but unable to, ignoring the weirded out look Naruto shoots him. 

And ignoring the indignant exclamation that ‘this mission will now take even longer.’

 

 

He stares down at the sword, glinting in the sunlight. 

The sword, obviously taken from Hayate’s grave, to be given to his reanimated body, in a mockery of respect.

 

 

Kakashi bends down and picks it up, the blade sharp and unforgiving.

 

Red pearls off of it, as he drags his finger along the edge, without feeling the pain.

 

 

 

He lifts his head, and nods at Sakura and Naruto. “To the village. Let’s go.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Visiting Kurenai, Mirai and Konohamaru in their tent for dinner after the mission had been something that had been cathartic and hard in equal measure. On one hand, being with them, cuddling Mirai, and seeing Kurenai and Konohamaru interact had warmed his soul.

On the other hand Kurenai had ripped it apart, easily, with a rather sympathetic glance… and Konohamaru had kept asking questions in regards to Naruto and Sasuke, no matter how much Kurenai had tried to shush him. 

 

Kakashi smiles grimly while walking home, the headache a writhing, living thing, heaving a sigh. Typical nosy almost 12 year old. He snorts. And especially him.

 

Still. 

It had been good to be with them nonetheless.

 

Especially after the way Naruto had simply vanished after the mission. 

 

Kakashi had shut his mouth on the offer for dinner.

Had swallowed it down.

 

 

It’s churning in his gut now, though. Viciously.

 

 

He looks up as Shizune falls into step with him, as always just appearing to be walking leisurely, a skill of nonchalance to her showing up that brings a quirky smile to his mouth. “Shizune-san… not sending an Anbu today?”

She smirks but sighs, loudly, with a shake of her head. “No, not this time. I figured you’d prefer it if I told you before we get to the tower.”

He quirks an eyebrow, the levity vanishing, turning towards the tower. “Tell me?”

Shizune sighs again, lowering her voice. “There has been another attack on the Land of Lightning. Supposedly, the attacker tried to kill Ay.” They share a quick look. Shizune quirks an eyebrow. “Supposedly, that attacker was Naruto.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he laughs. “What.”

Shizune rolls her eyes, her lips twitching. “Right?” She shrugs. “Still. We have video confirmation.”

Kakashi frowns, sobering immediately with a grimace. “That’s bad. Did they try to release the jutsu?” He tilts his head. “I mean, it must have been some kind of transformation jutsu, right?”

Shizune scoffs. “Obviously.” She nods at the general direction of ‘their’ tent. “I mean, we know exactly where he is, right.” She pauses, realizing her tone, mumbling: “Sorry.”

Kakashi swallows, shaking his head. “Don’t be. Because yes, I mean, even if we were, like, convinced that he would never do that, we do know where he is these days.”

With Sasuke, making out. Constantly. 

He shakes the thought off, with an effort. 

Shizune grimaces, and then clears her throat. “Right.” 

They are both silent, for a moment.

 

Kakashi swallows, continuing their discussion with an effort. “So, a setup. Do we know why?”

Shizune smiles, a bit grimly. “Only that Mui, the commander of Hozuki castle, has informed us that he expects Naruto to be delivered to be imprisoned within the week.”

Kakashi halts, in front of the steps that lead up to the tower’s entrance. “What.” What the ever loving…

Shizune clicks her tongue. “Our sentiment exactly.”

Kakashi frowns, drawling a bit. “How fast exactly did that request come after the attack?”

Shizune raises her eyebrows, tilting her head, obviously echoing his thoughts. “Within 48h.”

“Uh huh.” The audacity. Kakashi snorts, shaking his head, while resuming his walk, pushing open the doors. “Is he getting old, or why does he think that a request like that might not pique our curiosity? That’s just…”

Shizune hums. “Stupid, yes.”

Kakashi walks up the stairs with her, silent for a moment. He asks, just as she pushes open the door to Tsunade’s office. “So, what is the plan?”

Tsunade looks up, her face very tired, but the eyes glowing irately. “The plan is that we send Naruto to Hozuki castle, as requested. He needs to find out what is happening there. And if it has anything to do with our…” She extends her arm, gesticulating at the destruction visible through the windows. “… other problems.”

What. Kakashi stares at her for a long, long moment, and then frowns, his stomach revolting against the idea. “Sending him in on a mission like that will put him in direct danger. Especially since he is bound to be pretty blunt in his investigations.” And that’s an understatement.

There is a pause, and then it clicks, and Kakashi grimaces, lifting his hand to wave at her in a negating manner, tone dripping with acid. “Ohhhh, you want to send him in without telling him.” He hisses through his teeth. “You cannot be serious.” You. Cannot. Be. Serious.

He’s not sure how long exactly, but it’s been quite a while since he’s been this furious. 

And at her, especially.

If ever. 

 

Tsunade pulls a face at his expression, but her eyes stay hard. “Logically, tell me, Kakashi, do you, as one of the leading ninjas in this village, do you see a better way?”

Kakashi scoffs, but turns away, crossing his arms, and clenching his teeth.

 

The mental admission comes with a wave of self-loathing and anger, and helpless fatalism.

No, and you know it. Everyone is gearing up for war right now, Konoha is destroyed and a refusal of this request from our joke of a justice system would rile up all the smaller countries, who rely on this whimsy semblance of control of the bigger countries through said system. We cannot deny the request or else our alliance will crumble before this shit show has even properly started. 

He growls, under his breath. 

 

Tsunade hums, with a nod, and a sigh. “Our options are limited, Kakashi. Please trust me when I say that I do not like it either… but… We will be on standby.”

Kakashi nods, once, with a bitter little smile, his teeth aching where he clenched them so hard. He shoots her a look, a last piece slotting into place when he sees her fidget. His voice drops to a sardonic whisper. “Oh… And you want me to sell it to him. That’s nice.” Use me, and his trust in me, to accept the validity of this action. He snarls behind his mask, staring out the window. Feeling sick. 

He can see Shizune grimace, from the corner of his eye, but Tsunade’s tone is hard. “Yes.” Her voice gentles somewhat. “And keep Sasuke from killing us.”

 

Ire runs through Kakashi, so potent and sudden it almost frightens him. He turns away, unable to look at her. 

Her voice reaches him, as if through water. “I would appreciate it, if you wouldn’t kill me either.”

His hand twitches. 

There’s ozone in the air.

 

Heaven help me, but right now…

 

A small smirk appears in Tsunade’s tone, quite audible. Her voice is soft now, too, kind, grating on Kakashi’s nerves. “I know what I ask of you.” She exhales. “In a way, I am very grateful that you are feeling this intensely.” She hums. “But I need you to put that energy into the upcoming war.”

Kakashi cackles, quietly, under his breath.

She continues, sighing through her nose. “Look at it this way. At least it will slow them down a bit.” She clicks her tongue. “They’re going extremely fast.”

Kakashi snorts, viciously, turning back to her. “And what exactly did you expect. They’ve been hurling towards each other ever since they met.” He swallows, knowing it’s the truth, too. “Besides, it’s not as if they could, you know…” He trails off, the muscles in his jaw jumping. Refusing to go there. 

And yet, there’s this tiny part of him that agrees. That wants to agree.

Tsunade is silent for a moment, her tone imploring. “We will use Naruto’s absence to properly debrief Sasuke. He would just haunt our steps otherwise anyways.”

Kakashi snorts, darkly.

 

There’s this small, twisting part of him though. This part that’s suppressed, viciously. That part that’s… glad. 

 

Kakashi swallows, tasting bile, sick and furious at himself. 

 

But also, weirdly, unable to help himself. 

 

Tsunade nods at Shizune, who inclines her head, leaving. 

Kakashi cackles, feeling hot and cold all over, close to out-of-body. “What. Now? Really?”

Tsunade sniffs. “I have requested for a chakra cage to be delivered. He won’t be able to break out of those.”

Kakashi stares at her, a bit flabbergasted. “You’re actually serious.” Am I actually serious?

She sighs, and then her voice becomes hard once more. “It will be good for him to have to rely on his other skills for once. Besides…” She quirks an eyebrow. “He is a sage now. Time to fully tap into the potential.”

His tone is acerbic. “Like what.”

She shrugs. “Healing. Communication. We’ll see. I don’t think he knows his whole skill set either.”

Kakashi presses his lips together. “I want a time limit to the mission.” At the very least. 

Tsunade nods. “Two weeks, yes.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes at the immediate, precise response. “Two weeks…?”

She licks her lips, looking down at her desk. “That is when he will leave with Sasuke to meet with Killer-B.”

Kakashi blinks, his voice toneless. Huh. “I see.”

 

Tsunade looks at him, and then closes her eyes for a long moment. “Better brace yourself, Kakashi. He will be here soon.”

Kakashi stares at her, unblinkingly, mind blank. 

Filled to the brim with… hate. 

 

At her. 

And himself. 

 

Tsunade blinks, and then nods once. Clicking her tongue. “Keep that feeling.” Her voice drops. “For the war.” Her tone turns caustic. “It will make it easier.”

Kakashi’s voice is a whisper, seething like the fires of hell. “Nothing makes it easier, and you know it.”

Tsunade quirks a small smile. “Still.”

Her eyes flit to the door, unseeing for a moment. Her tone is hard once more. An order. “Brace yourself.”

 

He blinks and steps back, feeling like throwing up. 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

The village feels empty without Naruto, and oppressive, even though there isn’t much there. 

 

Kakashi walks through what is left and resurrected as if in a daze, the indignant disappointment on Naruto’s face when they’d arrested him eating at him. 

 

He scoffs, silently. Yeah, and rightfully so. And I can emphasize. 

His eyes find the Hokage heads in the distance, then drop to the tower below it. That is why I never wanted the hat. Still don’t want it. As Hokage one is bound into the system, chained to it, even more than I am now. You have to acquiesce to it, even if it is the wrong thing to do. He reaches up, massaging his temple. Still… I would have never thought she would… 

He trails off, realizing he is lying to himself. This isn’t about her being corrupted or bad or anything, and you know it. He frowns, remembering how she had made that comment about celebrations back then, when they had defeated the Akatsuki members that had killed Asuma. When none of them had felt like celebrating. It is literally her job to see the big picture, no matter the personal feelings. Jiraiya refused to take this job, this job to make the hard decisions, and pushed it at her, more or less against her will. She’s just trying to do it.

He grimaces, sniffing once. Fucking shit.

 

Genma appears at his side, shooting him a sidelong glance while falling into step with him. “I heard.”

Kakashi grimaces again, not looking up. 

Genma narrows his eyes. "Do you agree with this course of action?

Kakashi cannot help himself, he snorts. "Did you always agree with everything the Yondaime decided?“

Genma hums. "Fair point.“ He chews on the toothpick for a moment, shifts it to the other corner of his mouth. "That why you don’t want the hat?“

Kakashi pulls a face. "Among other things.“ He shrugs. "But, I guess, one day…“ One day she‘ll push it at me. When she cannot stand it anymore. 

Genma quirks an eyebrow, tone… weird. "At least you would be able to make the hard decisions.“

Kakashi frowns. "At least?“

Genma weighs his head, shrugging with his hands in his pocket. "Think Naruto would be the right one to make these decisions?“

Kakashi halts, and then turns to him. Glowering. His tone borders on cold. "Anything you‘d like to say, Genma?“

Genma grimaces, turning to him, but he raises his eys, locks their gaze. "Naruto is far from how we were at that age. And yet he is the currently strongest ninja in this village, but instead of using his strength and position to help it, he has spent the time after the conference literally fucking hi…“

Kakashi’s right hand snaps forward, faster than he can think. Cutting off Genma‘s words. He doesn’t recognize his own voice. "What was that?“

Genma hesitates, and then steps forward, against the hand pressing into his throat. Forcing the words out. "I doubt that Naruto is fit to be Hokage one day.“

Kakashi‘s mouth twitches, in a snarl. His voice is a whisper. "Because he is following his heart?“

Genma grunts. "Yes. And he shouldn’t be allowed to just…“

Kakashi jerks, and then pushes Genma back, back, back all the way back against the next wall, a few dozen steps back, effectively cutting him off. Genma grunts when he is almost rammed into the wall, Kakashi pressing forward with force. 

He knows he’s using too much of his strength right now, but he’s not giving the slightest fuck, leaning in to growl his words into Genma‘s ear. "Don’t you dare. Don’t you dare to make any further demands of him, or me, or Sasuke. Or Sakura while we’re at it. But especially, especially not Naruto. Don’t you dare. Naruto who has been used and abused his whole life, from his fucking birth. By the villagers, by the enemy, and even, in a way, by his father. He’s been used as a vessel, and as a tool, and a bargaining chip. A threat, a promise, an insurance, a punching bag and as a collective symbol of hate.“ 

He leans even closer. "And he knows it, too.“ He chuckles, darkly. "And now, now, for the good of the village, I was used to send him away, to prison, and we pretended we actually believed this idiotic story we were served and ohh, Genma, you have no idea how the betrayal in his eyes hurt me, NO IDEA!“ 

He‘s panting now, the words rushed. "I’m really not looking forward to the discussion that will happen when he gets back. And I don’t care if you and I were used, too, or if all the ninjas are supposed to be tools, because we’re not, are we, we live, and we breathe, and we decide to acquiesce, for allegiance and the village, and the supposedly greater good, and, let me tell you, NARUTO does not… No, he does not believe in this kind of acquiescence, he believes he can change things, he chooses to believe in what he sees in people‘s hearts…“ He breaks off, panting heavily, and then pushes away, almost cooly watching as Genma falls forward, clutching his throat and coughing loudly. 

Kakashi‘s tone is cold, so cold. "Naruto will be allowed to do anything he wants with his life, I will see to that.“ He grimaces, with a dark chuckle. "After the war at least.“ If I make it. He snorts, lifting his head. "And, you know…“ He clicks his tongue. "He will be the Hokage we‘ll need. The one who will shy away from these kind of decisions.“ He snarls again, the motion even visible through the mask. "And rightfully so.“ He exhales. “He will be the one to find another way.”

 

Genma straightens up slowly, still breathing heavily, with a grimace. His tone is flat. "I still doubt we’ll ever live in a world where he would be fit to be that Hokage.“ 

Kakashi steps up to him, hands at his sides, watches as Genma warily fidgets. He leans in again, tone low. "I will create this world for him then.“ He clicks his tongue. "That’s a promise.“

I will make it happen.

Genma stares at him, for long seconds. He swallows, tone rough. "You really mean that.“

Kakashi blinks, slowly, realizing it’s the simple, utter truth. "Yes.“ I do mean that. With every fiber of my being.

Genma chuckles, shaking his head while still rubbing his throat. "I‘d never have taken you for an optimist before.“

Kakashi chews on that for a moment, and then scoffs, some of the energy fading. "I don’t need to be. It just is that way.“

Genma inhales deeply, finally dropping his hands again. There’s a bruise on his throat. "Because he is your soul-mate?“

Kakashi blinks, and then smiles, softly. "No.“ He shrugs. "Because he is Naruto.“

 

Genma stares at him, for so long Kakashi is getting uncomfortable. And then he sighs, deeply, with a groan. "Fine. It‘ll be enough for me.“

Kakashi blinks, taken aback. "What?“

Genma shrugs. "I… needed your honest reaction to all the mess and the rumors and...“ He gesticulates, grinning suddenly. “I needed to remind you, too, I guess.“ He shrugs.

Kakashi blinks again, with a small gasp, and then he tilts his head, tone very low, all the anger gone suddenly, leaving only thrumming exhaustion behind. And you did. “Thank you.“ He grimaces, a bit. Thank you, Genma.

Genma snorts. "Yeah, I think it’s hard when you’re stuck making the decisions. You need people who are not afraid to set you straight.“ He nods at Kakashi. “Remember that when you choose your advisors, eventually.” He shifts the toothpick to the other side again, grins a bit lopsidedly. “But, to get back to the jutsu… We need another member for that. Someone with excellent chakra control. Thoughts?“

Kakashi raises his head, shares a long look with him. he clicks his tongue. "Maybe?“

Genma grins. 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“You let Naruto be sent to prison???”

Kakashi grimaces, easily hearing the ire and disgust in Iruka’s voice.

He clicks his tongue. “Yes. Apparently the justice system is compromised, and we…”, he hisses, soundlessly, pressing the words out, “we needed to find out why.”

Iruka stares at him. “And so you sent him to prison.” He shakes his head, once. “I don’t get it.”

Kakashi grimaces, and reaches up to rub his temple, before returning to his task, namely sorting through folders and scrolls to find the ones detailing the contracts with the weapons providers. He can hear Iruka shift behind him. Likely crossing his arms now, glowering at me. He sighs. “I didn’t like it either.” And that’s an understatement. “But you may remember, we even talked about that before, he is not suited to go in undercover…”

Iruka snorts. Very derisively. Tone dripping with sarcasm. “And so you thought it a good idea to break his trust.” He unlocks his arms, clapping his hands, slowly. “Bravo.”

Kakashi freezes, and then turns, glowering at him. He hisses the words. “Do you really think I had a choice.”

Iruka’s expression is pinched. “I think if you hadn’t sold it to him no-one could have, yes.” He narrows his eyes, tilts his head. “So tell me, Kakashi, why did you sell it to him.”

Kakashi grimaces, turning away again, silent. Eventually he clicks his tongue. “The Godaime is bound into the system, and as such…”

“Bullshit.” Iruka interrupts him, full of ire. “Try again.”

Kakashi inhales, deeply, before turning to him. “She made a valid point.”

Iruka frowns. “Which is?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, straightens his back. “It’s better to debrief Sasuke now, without him here. And to separate them a bit, since they’re going way too fast.”

Iruka blinks. And then scoffs. “Too fast? Did you really just speak these words? To me? Really?”

Kakashi clenches his jaw, looking away. He pushes his hands into his pockets. 

 

Iruka stares at him, tone flabbergasted. “You really let jealousy direct your actions.”

Kakashi coughs a laugh, black tar twitching deep within him. “I’m not jealous.” Something in him whispers: Liar. With a grin. 

“Uh huh.” Iruka nods, arms crossed again, looking away for a moment. His tone is hard. “Stop the mission.”

Kakashi grimaces. “I can’t. It’s out of our hands.” He swallows. “Besides, we are on standby already. If anything happens over there, that could justify interfering…” He trails off. We’ll be there. 

Iruka shakes his head, expression pinched, and then steps close, his voice dropping to a whisper. “Kakashi… Kaka-kun. Honestly, this was a bad, bad idea.” Kakashi swallows, trying not to meet his eyes, I know, dammit, but Iruka is having none of it, one hand coming up to hold Kakashi’s jaw lightly and make him look at him. His voice is imploring now. “Find a way to get him out of there. Now. Before…” He grimaces, trailing off. 

Kakashi swallows, hearing him just fine. Before something that cannot be fixed breaks.

He exhales, raising a shaking hand to his temple. His words are barely audible. “I’ll try.”

Iruka nods, and then shakes his head, his tone gentling somewhat. “I know you like our Godaime, and I know you want to believe in her integrity, and her actions… and, in many, many aspects, she has done Konoha very good.” Iruka turns his head, his fingers, clenching a bit, tone imploring now. “But, also in as many ways the only real allegiance you should have is to him.”

Kakashi frowns, opening his mouth to object, but Iruka continues, tone hard. “You already died for this village. You’ve literally gone and sacrificed your life. And… You were sent back for him. Why the hell can’t you get that through that thick head of yours.”

Kakashi blinks, unable to hold back sudden tears, the world blurring and unblurring, tone gruff. “I really shouldn’t have told you that.” 

Iruka snorts. And then leans up, to press his forehead against his, their hitai-ates clinking softly. “I told you, if your strength fails you can come to me.” He exhales, locking their gazes at short distance. “Contrary to popular opinion I know that you are but a man.”

Kakashi snorts, another tear dropping. 

 

Iruka sighs, through his nose. “Now. Find a way to get Naruto out of there.” His voice drops. “Before his light fades.”

A shiver runs down Kakashi’s spine. His throat clicks as he speaks. “You’re right. I will.”

Iruka nods once, and then pushes up to press a kiss to his eyebrow. “Good.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

It must be the aura preceding him, because Tsunade does not even put up much of a fight. Or discussion.

And is even coming with.

 

Kakashi just pulls everyone he can find together, and then moves towards Hozuki castle, his gut churning.

 

His tattoo burns.

And he’s trying to forget the way Sasuke’s eyes had drilled into his.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Ice runs through his veins, as Naruto ducks away from him, when Kakashi reaches out to ruffle his hair, just a bit.

 

There is no time to analyze though, the demon Satori raging. 

 

Kakashi watches as everyone protects Naruto, shields him to allow him to enter sage mode, the transformation breathtaking. 

The red coat that manifests… like an inverse of your father’s. Red with black flames. I wonder if that is subconscious. Kakashi blinks, letting another chidori rip through Satori, not doing any kind of significant damage.

Shadows appear around Naruto’s eyes, and Kakashi smiles, softly. Oh, how far you’ve come.

 

 

 

 

 

Not far enough though.

 

 

 

 

He watches, helplessly, as Naruto gets hurt, almost shocked into petrification by the big hole in his gut. Oh god, no. It’s like them. He blinks, everything dropping into surreality. 

It’s like them. 

 

Like them. 

 

 

He wants to jump over, to help, somehow, but Tsunade holds him back, with an iron hand on his arm.

Her tone is hard, and breathless. “No, wait, Kakashi. Not even Killer-B could help him.” She nods her head. “And look, he’s still standing.” She grins, just a bit. “The fox won’t allow him to die.”

She jumps away, to catch the fleeing prisoners, while Kakashi stares.

 

When Mui seals the demon back into the box… Naruto falls.

 

 

 

Everything is so, so far away.

 

 

 

 

Blood, blood everywhere, and a body, with a hole in its gut.

 

Kakashi cannot breathe, feeling like throwing up.

Oh god, no.

 

 

 

He races over, as if in a dream, watches as the prisoner called Ryūzetsu drops to her knees next to Naruto, yelling at him.

 

 

The sounds do not reach Kakashi.

 

He cannot feel anything, sense anything.

 

Know anything.

 

 

 

Ryūzetsu bends down to Naruto, her jutsu beautiful and sad.

 

Time slows.

 

Drips.

 

 

 

His tattoo burns.

Throbs.

 

 

In time with his heart.

 

 

 

Kakashi blinks, watching as Naruto is literally kissed back to life.

 

 

He shivers, mind sluggish, and yet frantic.

 

Where are our healers?

Where is Tsunade? 

 

Where is Sakura? Hinata? 

 

 

He swallows. Eyes riveted to the way Naruto’s chest rises and falls once more, the flesh of his body mending slowly. 

 

And then…

 

Naruto’s eyes open, and there is this moment… this moment before the others smile at him, hug him, yell at him… this moment before Naruto pastes a smile on…

 

 

This moment, where Kakashi knows. 

Somehow.

 

 

 

And it’s terror.

 

 

 

 

 

What have I done?

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Where were you.”

 

It is not a question.

And Kakashi’s tone is far from polite, his nerves raw, and singing.

 

Tsunade lowers her hand, slowly, her face changing slowly from satisfaction to extreme exhaustion. She shoots a look at the door, where the others had just left after the debriefing. Where Naruto had disappeared through, without a look back.

She clicks her tongue. “We had to catch the fleeing prisoners. Upholding the system had to be first priority. You’ll understand someday.”

Kakashi hisses. “Understand what.”

Tsunade smirks, tiredly. “That things need to be done, somehow. Anyhow. You’ll understand when you’re ready.”

Kakashi grimaces, his words saturated with fire now, understanding now, all too well. “I won‘t let the end justify the means.”

Tsunade‘s eyes are sad, but there’s something in her voice, vibrating. “Good luck.”

 

Kakashi turns on his heel, something shifting, deep, deep down within him.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“He doesn’t want to see you.”

 

Kakashi stares at a spot over Sasuke’s left shoulder, tries not to feel.

He swallows, tone low. “Please, I…” I need to talk to him. I need to… I need.

Sasuke’s voice is hard. Cutting. “No.”

 

Kakashi drags his eyes to Sasuke’s dark ones. He whispers. “Please.”

 

Sasuke inclines his head, just a bit. Tone hard. “Get lost, Kakashi.”

 

Kakashi stares at the flapping tent for a moment longer, and then turns away, slowly, taking the first step away one of the hardest things he’s ever done. 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Naruto is there, suddenly, in the darkest part of the night. 

Just before dawn.

 

Kakashi’s eyes blink open, carefully pushing up into a seated position, not wanting to trigger him into fleeing. Because I know how it is… how strong the impulse to hide away is. He swallows, harshly, feeling the cloth of the mask move with the motion. I know. 

He engages a privacy seal, whispers. “Thank you for coming, Na…”

Naruto interjects, tone flat. “I was asking myself why you did that, you know.” He snorts. “If I had done something wrong.”

Kakashi grimaces, pulling up his knees. He opens his mouth to respond, say something, baka, but Naruto is faster.

His tone is laced with barb wire now. Wrapping itself around Kakashi’s throat. “Or if it was jealousy.” He cackles, once. “But, you know, I couldn’t align that with my view of you…” Naruto locks his gaze with Kakashi’s the eyes dark and expressionless in the dim light. “At least at first.”

He clicks his tongue. “You are jealous, aren’t you.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. Sacrificing himself to the pain of truth, ignoring the burning of his tattoo. The taste of ash. “Of course.” He exhales shudderingly, shaking his head, once. “But that isn’t why we sent you there, why this happened, we jus…”

Naruto’s tone is cold. “You have no idea what happened.”

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut. Oh god. He sobs, once, tone broken. “I saw your eyes when you were revived.” He snarls, while the tears fall. “Naruto, I…”

Naruto hisses at him. “Don’t.” He points a finger, and suddenly his tone breaks, silver tracks of light that reflect off his tears breaking the darkness. “Don’t you dare pity me. You sent me to a place you knew I would be robbed of all my chakra. My jutsus. My defenses. You sent me there without knowledge, without reason.” He breaks off, breathing heavily now, tone rising when he speaks. “You sent me there, in a cage. You sent me there, knowing.” The finger shakes. “Knowing they would…”

A sound leaves Kakashi’s throat, a sound that is only vaguely human. He shifts, and crawls over, taking Naruto’s finger and pulling him into an embrace, Naruto not offering any resistance. He shakes his head, a bit wildly, shivering, fingers clenched into Naruto’s hair. Feeling the tension in the body in his arms.

His tone breaks on the words. “No, I didn’t. I didn’t, please, please believe me.” He’s clutching Naruto’s shoulders now, tightly, the body beneath his hands still taut as a spring. “Naruto, please tell me what happened, tell me, you need to talk…”

Naruto scoffs, and then pushes back, pushing Kakashi’s hands away. 

His tone is hard, but shivering with pain. “I don’t need to do shit.” He points that shaking finger again. “You betrayed my trust.” His voice drops to a whisper. "You let me die… you once promised me you wouldn’t let me die, remember?“

 

Pain, pain, pure and almost beautiful. 

Almost. 

 

The world wobbles and then clears again, as the tears fall. 

Naruto leans in, with a hiss, eyes riveted to Kakashi’s left eye now. “I wonder if it can develop from what you’re feeling right now. If this betrayal was enough to advance it.”

Kakashi jerks, as if whipped.

His tone is caustic, a whisper of broken recognition, clinging to some kind of logic. “Unfortunately, Obito didn’t betray you as I did, and it apparently needs to happen in both, so… no, I guess.”

Naruto frowns, staring at him with a stubborn pout. “Obito? The Obito you told me about? Why would he…”

Kakashi frowns, and then raises his gaze, very slowly. Braces himself, though he knows it is futile. “Tobi is Obito.”

 

There is a moment of nothing, and then a very loud: “WHAT?”

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, averting Naruto’s gaze. “It’s complicated.”

Naruto chuckles, the sound like icicles, cutting Kakashi’s skin. Echoing. “Complicated.”

Kakashi grimaces. 

 

And then he swallows, raising his eyes again, locking them with Naruto’s hard ones. 

Seemingly changing the subject, the words tasting like ash in his mouth. “You were truly dead then, weren’t you? There at Hozuki castle.”

Naruto frowns, and then blinks, leaning back. He crosses his arms. “I guess. Though… I was watching from the outside.”

Kakashi frowns, taken back a bit. “You weren’t in the vestibule?”

Naruto blinks. And shrugs. And then he looks away, for a moment, unseeing over Kakashi’s left shoulder. “I… I’m not sure. But somehow I knew I could decide to come back.” His eyes return to Kakashi’s. “I came back for you, and Sasuke, and…” He trails off, frowning. His voice drops to a whisper. “I regret it right now.”

Kakashi smiles bitterly, remembering the feeling of peace well. And then, the feeling of loss. “That feeling will pass.”

Naruto pulls a face, tone caustic. “Will it.”

Kakashi laughs, once, devoid of any humor. “More or less.”

 

Naruto snorts, and looks away. His gaze falls on the potted plants, off to the side. 

He frowns. “I thought Mr. Ukki was destroyed.”

Kakashi nods, swallowing. “I had thought so, too. But Obito…” He trails off.

Naruto nods, once, and then he clicks his tongue. “You two seem to be pretty connected. Maybe you’re bonded?”

Kakashi shivers, feeling suddenly flayed open. Bleeding out.

He forces the words out. “Ah, no, I…”, he swallows, frowning, “I told you, I know who my soul-mate is.” He shivers again, waiting, muscles locked. 

Naruto blinks. “Right. You said you could finally talk about it all. But we never did because everything just…” 

He trails off, and Kakashi smiles, bitterly, finishing the statement. “Everything just kept happening.”

Naruto stares at him, for a long moment, and then scoots back, into a corner. He settles into it, with a sigh, feet propped up, hands loosely on his knees. “I’m listening.”

Kakashi scoffs, barking a laugh. “Now? Just like that?”

Naruto’s tone is light, but flat. Demanding. “Yes.”

Kakashi stares at him. 

 

Mind… a flatline.

 

 

The thoughts come, eventually, with a weird kind of dark humor.

 

Well, this is it. 

 

I hope I find the right words.

 

 

Naruto tilts his head. Silently prompting.

 

 

Kakashi clicks his tongue, looking away.  

 

Eventually, he crawls over, to the wall, settling against it, the short distance from Naruto burning.

 

Kakashi smiles, softly. 

Pulls down his mask, slowly. 

 

Feeling naked.

And rightly so.

 

His voice is a whisper. “My father killed himself when I was very young, I never knew my mom. I told you, I know, but I didn’t tell you what happened after, that…” He exhales, the name still hard to speak out loud, especially to Naruto. “Minato took me under his wings. He and your mom trained me, even before I became officially part of his team.” He frowns, and then chuckles, once. “Her name was Kushina, she was a red head, and an Uzumaki, which is part of why she was chosen as the nine-tails jinchuriki. They knew they were bonded, very early.” 

He frowns, hesitating for a long moment. His voice shakes when he continues. “I was a prodigy, and one with a stick up his ass, due to the village’s treatment of my father. And the teachings at that time. We were at war, and war doesn’t leave much innocence intact… I was sent on missions with him, very early.”

He swallows again, exhaling softly. “One of those missions was to Loran.” He closes his eyes for a very long moment, trying to gather strength. Shoots Naruto a look. “But you remember that as well.”

Naruto watches him, almost dispassionately, giving the tiniest nod.

Kakashi smiles, a smile that bleeds. He needs three tries to actually speak the words. “I recognized the bond there.”

Naruto frowns, and Kakashi fidgets, continuing after a moment, tears falling. “I recognized it and… Sensei Minato took me home after, called me into the Anbu, and locked my memories with a temporal lock. Under my Anbu tattoo.” His voice drops to a whisper. “All in one go.” He scoffs. “I did not understand then.” He chuckles. “I did not understand for a long, long time.”

Naruto hums. “So that is why your tattoo has a gradient? Because of the temporal incursion?” He leans forward, tone neutral. “Your bond is with Sensei Yamato?”

 

Everything within Kakashi grinds to a halt, and he turns his head, slowly. 

Tone flabbergasted. “What??”

 

There is a moment of nothing, and then Naruto shuffles away, all his carefully upheld nonchalance shattering. His voice is too high, the pain in it brutal. “It is with me?”

Kakashi shudders, shuffling after him, but staying a few inches away, knowing better than to touch right now. His tone is imploring. “Naruto, this really cannot come as a big…”

Naruto turns to him. Yells. “Oh you’ve got to be kidding me. You tell me all about bonds, and love outside of bonds, and you tell me you want me, and reject me, and now you tell me you recognized the bond back then?? THEN??”

Kakashi grimaces, tone broken. “I could not remember.”

Naruto scoffs, coming towards him now, eyes glowing in the vague early morning light. “But you knew what the darkening of the tattoo meant, right? I mean, it always had that line around it, it must have been clear for you?” His face falls, pain bleeding through. Naruto’s voice shivers., continuing, not giving Kakashi enough time to interject. “And yet you let me grow up like that… all alone. You let the scorn of the village happen. You let me suffer.” He breaks off, breathing harshly. 

Kakashi closes his eyes. Tasting bile. Yes. I let you suffer.

Naruto whispers. “You knew, and yet you let me get hurt.” He chuckles, harshly, the sound suffused with pain. “You knew and yet you let me go.”

Kakashi jerks, with a gasp. 

 

Naruto sits back, slowly, on his haunches. He is silent for a long moment, breathing harshly, watching Kakashi. And then he raises his head, tone hard. “What else. Start at my birth.” He scoffs. “That must have been something, right.”

Kakashi shakes his head once, emotionally exhausted. “Indeed.” He sighs, shuffling back to the wall, leaning against it. “Obito tried to rob the nine-tails that night. He and Minato fought, just after your birth. Obito had needed to weaken the nine-tails seal, which is something that apparently always happens when the female jinchuriki gives birth.” 

He smiles, softly, almost gently. “Minato had given me the day off, because he thought that the birth was still a few days away, but… it was hastened.” He inhales, deeply. “Your father managed to hurt Obito, and from the traces on the scene we know that Kushina managed to trap the nine-tails again. Long enough for your father to…” He trails off. Do I really need to tell you that he is in hell now? That what you saw in that chakra memory was just a reflection? Do you need to know he is suffering, now, every second? He closes his eyes for a moment. No. 

Naruto’s voice shivers, but his tone is hard, carrying a hiss. Prompting. “To do what.”

Kakashi’s throat clicks. “Minato used a… certain jutsu to split the nine-tails chakra. He took one half with himself, sealed the other into you.” He blinks, and then smiles, painfully, with an effort. “But you know that.” He chuckles, without any humor. “But you probably don’t know that Minato did the seal on your stomach with that ink.”

Naruto stares at him, silently.

Waiting.

Kakashi snorts, and then chuckles, while tears fall once more. “I arrived at the scene, eventually. You were…” He shakes his head, face crumbling. “You were there, on a slab of stone, on the blanket I had helped pick out, had carried home for her and they… they were there, behind you, on the ground, with those big holes in their guts, such huge holes and…” Holes, like you had the other day.  Only they did not recover from them. He sniffs, reaching up to wipe his eyes. “I stepped up to you, and your tattoo darkened.” He laughs, bitterly. “The Sandaime knew what it meant, immediately. Ironically, he had had a similar tattoo, once upon a time.”

 

There is a long pause, as both just dwell on it all, the pain in the room palatable. 

Naruto breaks it, eventually. “Obito managed to kill them?”

Kakashi shakes his head, with a sniff. “No. As I said, your father managed to hurt Obito, and eventually, he was driven off.” He swallows, harshly. “The fox killed them.”

Naruto’s voice is a whisper. Broken. “Why.”

Kakashi shrugs, answering, though he knows that Naruto hadn’t really meant it as a question. “Maybe… it didn’t want to be imprisoned anymore.” He shrugs again. “I don’t know.” He shakes his head, once. “We’re taught that the bijous are evil, that they have to be subjugated…” He tilts his head to look at Naruto, with a sigh. “But we are taught many things. And oftentimes these things are used to justify the means.” 

The thought comes with a vicious bout of self-hatred, one that he hasn’t felt for quite a while. And I support this behavior, again and again. For the greater good.

Naruto’s voice is toneless. “Like me being sent to prison.”

Yes. Kakashi’s tone is wobbly. “And you ended up with a hole in your gut, too.”

Naruto snorts, viciously. He looks away for a moment, at Mr. Ukki, and then back at Kakashi. “What else.”

 

Kakashi exhales shudderingly, bumping his head back against the wall, once. “I… as I said, the Sandaime knew. And I…” He frowns. “I had been Anbu then, for years.” He snorts, derisively. “And, due to my sharingan, I was a very valuable Anbu.” His voice drops to a whisper. “A very valuable killer.”

He doesn’t look at Naruto now, watches the light filtering in through the blinds instead. “I… I didn’t want this bond. I hated what it stood for. I hated how it had come to pass.” He swallows. “I tried to hate you.” A small smile shivers over his face. “You, this small thing that was all that was left of those I loved so much… But I couldn’t. I couldn’t.” 

He closes his eyes. “I used to offer you my hand to hold onto when you cried, there, alone in the orphanage.” He smiles through the tears. “I cried with you.”

Naruto exhales, noisily pulling up his nose. 

Kakashi continues, very softly. “I saw those goggles on a mission. They were so similar to the ones that Obito had worn… I thought he was dead then, you know. And I mourned him… them. Every day.”

Naruto’s voice is a whisper, forcing Kakashi to look at him. “I remember those goggles… but you didn’t give them to me directly, right. Why?”

Kakashi chuckles, with a  shrug. “I wasn’t allowed to…” He clicks his tongue. “And, because I did not want to comply, the Sandaime made sure that I would nonetheless.”

Naruto frowns. “Comply?”

Kakashi shrugs again, stretching out his legs. “Ah, well, you know. Leaving you there, at the orphanage. Not giving you your real name. Not telling you, not…” He trails off. 

 

Naruto’s voice is brittle. “What is my real name?”

Kakashi smiles gently, sadly. “Namikaze Naruto. Son of the Yondaime, son to the Leaf’s Yellow Flash and the Leaf’s jinchuriki. Son to two of the most beautiful people in the world.” He raises a shaking hand, wipes at the tears. “I loved them so much.”

Naruto pulls his legs up further, hugs them to himself. 

Kakashi blinks slowly, continuing after a moment, needing it all out now. “The Sandaime sealed my ability to speak of it away… until you’d find out yourself or until you’d be of age.” He scoffs. “He set up laws so that no-one would be allowed to talk to you about it. Ostensibly to protect you.”

He scoffs again, watching the whiskers quiver. “I actually do think he wanted to protect you… though, to be honest, I really don’t know how that should have worked.” He snorts. “I mean, you’re pretty recognizable.”

Naruto snorts, and sniffs, angrily wiping at his face. His voice carries his exhaustion. “That is what released when we were on the way to the kage conference.”

Kakashi nods, slowly. “Yes.”

Naruto sniffs again. “When did the other seal release?”

Kakashi shrugs. “Oh, well, remember that moment in my house? When I had that seizure?”

Naruto barks a laugh, tone incredulous. “And yet you didn’t tell me.”

Kakashi blinks, very tiredly. “I couldn’t really explain without telling you of Minato, could I? And…” He trails off.

Naruto prompts, doggedly. “And?”

Kakashi whispers. “And you haven’t recognized the bond.” He smiles, softly, forcing himself to raise his eyes to Naruto’s. “You… like me. Love me even.” He smiles, broadly, painfully, the words tasting like ash. “I know. I love you, too.” He shakes his head, once. “But you haven’t recognized the bond. And…” He swallows, resisting the urge to tell Naruto he is too young still. “And at some point you will. Someday. Likely when it engages. And then you’ll know.”

 

You’ll know.

 

And then… you’ll decide.

 

Kakashi blinks, trying not to feel the terror coming with the thought.

 

There is a pause and then Naruto clears his throat. “What else.”

Kakashi turns his head, shakes it once, though not in denial. “Jiraiya was your godfather, he also carried a seal, which prevented him from telling of certain things.” He exhales, shakingly. “He sometimes picked up some of my pieces.”

Naruto hums, a sliver of humor in his voice. “That’s what you call that these days?”

Kakashi snorts, surprised by the insinuation. He tries to speak past the sudden constriction in his throat. “I didn’t know you knew.” Like that, at least. 

Naruto snorts and then giggles, helplessly, lowering his head and hiding his face in his arms. “I suspected.” He groans, loudly. “Oh god.”

Kakashi cackles, and then chuckles, while wiping at his eyes.

Naruto chimes in for a moment, and then sniffs, lifting his head again. “How come he was my godfather?”

Kakashi smiles, gently. “He was Minato’s Sensei.” He shoots Naruto a look. “Sora was Kushina’s.” He inhales, deeply. “She was rather disappointed you inherited his hair color…” They share a small chuckle, and Kakashi clicks his tongue. “But… you know, I am not, though I have to say that the name Uzumaki suits you.” He smiles wistfully. “By now I’m glad you have it.”

Naruto swallows. And then pulls a face, tone careful. “Am I related to Karin?”

Kakashi frowns, and then slowly shakes his head. “I… don’t think so. The Uzumaki were a very, very big clan. When the village was destroyed…” He trails off. And then he quirks an eyebrow. "Maybe in the same distance, relation-wise, as you are to Tsunade.“

Naruto stares at him, flabbergasted. "Baa-chan??“

Kakashi shrugs, vaguely amused by the reaction. "Well, Senju Mito, the first nine-tails jinchuriki was an Uzumaki, too… but she wasn’t directly related to your mother, despite being from the same clan. Third degree cousins or niece maybe. Or fourth. As I said it was a big clan.“ He sighs, through his nose. "Still, somewhere in those branches are Hashirama-sama, Mito-sama and their grandchild Tsunade… and Uzumaki Kushina, your mother.“ And Sora and Jiraiya. He shrugs. 

Naruto seems to dwell on that for a moment, his tone a bit off. “Is that why the necklace helped me with the control?”

Kakashi blinks, and then shrugs. “Maybe? I know the necklace was passed down from Hashirama, and him being Mito’s husband…”

Naruto hums, looking away again, unseeing, and Kakashi watches him, glad that there is some kind of levity again, between them, some kind of accord. 

 

Bridging the chasm of pain.

 

There is a ray of sun now, filtering through a hole in the blinds, and Naruto holds out his hand, plays with it for a moment. 

His voice is low when he speaks. “Why didn’t you unmask Obito when we encountered him?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “I wanted to. But I needed a moment to be sure, and…” He shakes his head, once. “I had thought he was dead for so long. Realizing he is the enemy…” Officially at least.

Naruto’s voice is low. “Do you hate him?”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, with a sigh. “I… don’t know.” He scoffs, shooting Naruto a look from the corner of his eyes. “I mean I should, right? Knowing he is the reason they are dead, knowing he is the reason so many are dead… knowing he is the one driving the war, knowing he is the one behind the massacre…”

Naruto frowns. “The massacre?”

Kakashi pulls a face. “Ah, right.” He blinks, once, slowly. “The Uchiha massacre. Obito is the one who helped Itachi. Who… took the eyes.”

Naruto grunts. “Ewww.” He grimaces. “Does Sasuke know?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “I’m not sure. Itachi does.”

Naruto frowns, leaning a bit forward. “What do they need the eyes for?”

Kakashi smiles, gently. “Blindness is the price of using the sharingan.” He shrugs. “But not if you replace the eyes, because apparently the nerves reconnect anew.”

“Oh.” Naruto looks away, unseeing. After a moment, his eyes return to Kakashi’s. “Are you going blind, too?” 

Kakashi shrugs. “I can sense the strain on it. I guess I will be, eventually.”

Naruto whispers. “Glad that you have another normal one still then.”

Kakashi smiles, with a nod. “Yeah, me too.” He exhales, in a rush. “Logically, I know I should hate Obito. But I can’t. I know he is only used, too.” He snorts, bitterly. “And I know what that feels like.”

Naruto shuffles a bit closer suddenly, eyes boring into his. “You have darkness in you, too.”

Kakashi chuckles, viciously. “Lots.” And I yearn for your light. 

Naruto’s eyes are huge, burning, laser blue in the single ray of sunlight. “How do you live with it?” He hesitates, his eyes flitting back and forth on Kakashi’s. “How do you live in this prison…” He trails off. 

Kakashi smiles, bitterly. “This prison of love and blood and despair?” Naruto nods, mutely, and Kakashi shrugs. “One breath after the other.” He swallows. “Sometimes that is all you can do.”

Naruto frowns, staring at him. 

His voice comes a bit haltingly. “Do you… you know, suppress it?” He grimaces. “Force it away?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, with a shrug. “I used to.” Until Sora forced me to face it. He clicks his tongue. “It’s a hard thing to face one’s own nightmares and fears and trauma.” He swallows. “And we both have an abundance of those.”

 

Naruto is silent for long seconds, angrily reaching up to wipe a tear away.

Kakashi blinks, very tiredly. “You need to allow it, Naruto. Accept it.” He swallows. “Not for their good, or what they expect of you.” He cackles. “Not for the good of the village.” He shakes his head. “But for yourself. It will eat you up otherwise, destroy you from the inside.” I know.

Naruto scoffs, his voice shaking. “You are the only one who seems to be aware of my darkness.”

Kakashi sniffs, and then shakes his head again. “No, I mean, yes, I know most of the others ignore that aspect of your… childhood, and your life, in general. But for example Sasuke”, he locks his gaze with Naruto, “Sasuke knows of your darkness.” He clicks his tongue. “Because it matches his own.”

Naruto stares at him. “You know of my darkness because it matches your own, too.”

Kakashi works his jaw, looking away. His voice is raw. “I know how hard absolution is to come by. How hard forgiveness is.” He grimaces. “You need to talk to someone, Naruto. Not just me.” Me, too, please. But not just me.

Naruto’s voice carries a note of stubbornness. “But I am talking to you.”

Kakashi grins, grimly, shooting him a sidelong look. “Someone professional.” He sniffs, smiling, a small, helpless smile. “Please continue to talk to me too though. Please.”

Naruto stares at him, eyes huge. His words come on a whisper. “Did something like this ever happen to you?”

Kakashi grimaces, while another tear drops. He shakes his head, tone carrying his absolute, fatal exhaustion. “Not like that. Other things…”

Naruto swallows. “You were abused, too.”

Kakashi exhales, and then shrugs. “It was other times.”

Naruto scoffs. “Oh please.”

Kakashi smiles, grimly. “It’s true though. No-one bothered thinking about sending out genins into war when there were people dying every moment. No-one bothered addressing trauma. No-one…” He trails off.

Naruto’s voice is small. “Not even my Dad?”

Kakashi sniffs. “Your Dad lived in these times, too. He… had to deal, too.” He blinks, voice dropping to a whisper. “I often saw the sadness in his eyes.” And for some of it I wouldn’t know the reason. He swallows. 

Naruto’s voice matches his. “Did he really kill a thousand enemies in one attack?”

Kakashi exhales, through his nose. “So they say.” He pushes his tongue to his front teeth for a moment, eyes faraway. “That was the mission we lost Obito on… his mission was to take out a whole squad, he sent us away on the supposedly easier mission… the squad turned out to be a battalion.”

Naruto’s voice is haunted. “I cannot imagine flashing from one to another, just… killing them.” He presses his lips together for a moment, his mouth a thin line. “Not even those assholes in the castle.”

Kakashi stares, tiredly. His voice is hollow. “What did they do, Naruto.” Tell me. Please.

Naruto looks away. He snarls, for a moment. “They took… liberties while looking for weapons, I guess. Enough to…” He swallows, and then hisses. “I know they would have done more, wanted to do more, too, but Mui wanted to use my chakra, so I was not that easy to… attain.” He grimaces, swallowing.

Kakashi closes his eyes, silent. Secretly, secretly, deep, deep down… relieved. At least, at least not that. Thank god. Please forgive me, but at least not…

Naruto clicks his tongue, halting his thought. His voice is deceptively light. “Who did you talk to.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away. 

Naruto’s voice is almost kind. “That’s what I thought.”

Kakashi snorts, shooting him a look. “My relationship with Iruka helped.”

Naruto blinks, tone neutral. “But it was destroyed because of me.”

Kakashi shakes his head, immediately. “Nooo, not destroyed… just…” He grimaces. “Changed.”

“Changed?” Naruto frowns. “So it wasn’t serious?”

Kakashi cackles, hiding his face in his hands, debating to lie, but deciding against it. “Yes, it was. But Naruto, I…” He laughs, something in him loosening. “Iruka knew. Eventually. He told me we had to break up. He knew I…” He falls silent, closing his eyes in the abject pain the memory elicits. He swallows, raising his eyebrows. “I will always love him. The love has changed over the years.” He grins, for a second, waggling his eyebrows. “There’s love outside bonds, you know.”

Naruto snorts, ducking his head. He tilts his head, shooting Kakashi a look from beneath his lashes. “So he was your first?”

Kakashi colors a bit, but shrugs, almost nonchalantly. Emphasizing heavily. “He is a good teacher.”

Naruto giggles, hands flying up to hide his face. “Oh god.”

Kakashi laughs, gently, and then sniffs. He gentles his voice, but decided to push nonetheless. “Are you enjoying all that you are experiencing with Sasuke?”

Naruto clears his throat, but raises his head, bravely. “Yes.” He clears his throat again, gaze flitting away. “Though I’m glad he isn’t my first.”

“Not your…” Kakashi stares at him, mouth open. What???

Naruto colors, spectacularly. 

 

He fidgets, and then grins, sharply, deliberately, nose scrunching. “I’m not gonna tell.”

Kakashi stares at him, and then starts laughing, helplessly. “Oh my god.” He hides his face behind his hands, words muffled. “Please don’t tell me you wanted to know after you heard…” He looks up, seeing Naruto’s blush deepen impossibly further. Righteous outrage colors Kakashi’s voice. “NARUTO!!”

Naruto fidgets, ducking his head. There’s laughter in his voice now. “Not right away!???”

Kakashi groans. There’s a weird kind of acceptance and fatalism in his voice, and truth. “Iruka is going to kill me.”

Naruto giggles. “Can I be there?”

Kakashi harrumphs, reaching for the pillow and throwing it at him.

Naruto laughs, catching it, and then presses it to himself. He sobers, slowly. 

His voice sounds faraway. “I miss you.” He hesitates, and Kakashi swallows. “I miss cuddling with you.”

Kakashi whispers, brokenly. “Don’t you cuddle with Sasuke?”

A small smile steals itself over Naruto’s face, there and gone again. “I do. But he’s…”, he frowns, obviously searching for the right words, “he’s much more demanding. Much more direct. He…” He trails off. 

Kakashi swallows, trying not to judge, not to feel, clicking his tongue. “So… how do you feel now, now that you know?”

Naruto’s blue eyes snap to his, bright in the gloomy half-light. “I don’t know. As you said, I apparently haven’t recognized the bond, though I…” He frowns, one hand dropping to his stomach, looking down. He whispers. “My stomach churns whenever I’m with you. Whenever I think of you.” He swallows again, his big eyes returning to Kakashi’s. “It flutters when I am with him.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long, long moment. “You should go then, enjoy the fluttering.” He forces the smile, a soft smile, full of all the kindness he can muster. “Never doubt that I will be here.”

Naruto blinks. “You said that before.”

Kakashi shrugs, throat dry. “It’s the truth.”

 

Naruto blinks again, voice almost an afterthought. “What would happen if I kissed you now?”

Kakashi smiles, a bit fatalistically. “I would break.” I would. For you.

Naruto tilts his head, staring. “You would… break?”

Kakashi shrugs, once. “I am but a man. I would not be able to let you go again.” And I would drown in your kiss.

Naruto exhales, expression incredibly sad. “And you love me.”

Kakashi hesitates, and then smiles, brilliantly. “I have known for a long time that I would fall in love with you.” And I am, still… it’s only just begun.

Naruto exhales, shudderingly. His voice is small. “It’s not fair?”

Kakashi smiles, a bit sadly. “Nothing ever really is.”

 

Naruto is silent again, for another long moment. He seems frail when he speaks again, unsure. “So, what happens now.”

Kakashi shrugs. “Now, I will make sure that Sasuke may accompany you to train with Killer-B. Get that bijou onto your side.” He grins, for a moment. “I know you can do it.”

Naruto bites his lips. “What if I cannot.”

Kakashi shakes his head, closing his eyes for a long blink. “There is no-one else who will be able to. I know that much.”

Naruto fidgets, with a frown. “What if the darkness in me wins.”

Kakashi hesitates, and then reaches up, ruffles his hair, insanely glad when Naruto doesn’t flinch away from his touch. “It won’t.”

Naruto’s voice is a whisper. “How can you be so sure.”

 

And Kakashi smiles, brilliantly. “Because you’re the one I love.”

 

Naruto sniffs. 

He fidgets, and then clears his throat, voice wobbly. “Anything else you’d like to tell me?”

Kakashi shrugs, tired, but also feeling lighter than he knows he has any right feeling. “Not that I know of?”

Naruto snorts gently, and then shrugs. “Just… stuff seems to happen to us.”

Kakashi tilts his head, with a nod. “Yeah.” That it does.

Naruto grimaces, just a bit. “I… I heard about Obito’s plans…”

Kakashi hums, watching his face, prompting. “What do you think of it?”

Naruto shrugs, a bit peevishly. “It’s just a dream, right? That jutsu? Why would he go after a dream?”

Kakashi swallows, harshly. He looks away for a moment. “Sometimes, that is all there is left to cling to.” And I understand that need, all too well.

Naruto watches him, eyes huge now. His voice is a whisper. “What is your dream?”

Kakashi closes his eyes, with a shuddering breath. “Everyone lives.” 

He reopens his eyes to Naruto smiling, beatifically.

 

The words are carried on a single tear, dropping from a whiskered cheek. “Yeah, I‘d love that too.”

 

 

 

Notes:

I always felt Naruto’s upcoming acceptance of his “darkness” a bit too easy in canon… but then again, I never saw it as a “hug and you’re gone” acceptance. More like a “I know you’re there, and that’s ok” acceptance. Naruto has been through a LOT. Some of it was addressed here. Some of it will still be addressed. But all of it shaped him.
And he decided to accept that.

Chapter 37: To tip the scales

Notes:

Long chapters ahead :)  (the next few are all over 10k)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

“Ah. I see you brought someone with the most excellent chakra control.”

Kakashi shrugs, clicking his tongue. “You said that was needed.”

Genma smirks, shifting the toothpick to the other corner of his mouth. “That I did.” He grins at Neji. “So, ready to flash through time and space?”

Neji blinks. “I thought that, while it is a spacetime jutsu, it only flashes through space?” He shoots Kakashi a look. “Is there a temporal component to it?”

Kakashi opens his mouth to respond, but Genma is faster.

He shakes his head. “No. Not in execution. In theory, yes, but that is beyond my abilities.” He snorts. “Thankfully.”

Kakashi grimaces a bit. “Yeah, the last we need right now is a messy timeline, too.”

Neji hums, something shivering in his voice. “Not interested in changing the past?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, tone dry. “The present is messy enough as it is. I’m not sure we’d be able to help there.”

Neji blinks. 

Kakashi shoots him a look, and then sighs. “I know, I regret lots of things, too.” He grimaces. “But changing something in the past would have ripple effects to the present. And no-one can predict those. So we would be stuck in an ever widening rift between what we know and what we want, because we would try to just fix that small thing, too, in order to get what we want…” He sniffs, laughing, once. “And we could not lock the memories of ourselves, right, not without mastering the seals, so…” He trails off.

Both Neji and Genma stare at him.

He shrugs, and clears his throat. “Long story.”

Genma clicks his tongue. “Oooookay.” He exhales, and then addresses Neji. “This jutsu may be only be taught by those who know it, and who are in direct service of the ruling Hokage.” He shrugs. “That is the rule that Sensei Minato put up at least, though we are obviously amending it a bit. Still, no teaching it to your clan.”

Neji blinks. “I understand.” He tilts his head. “That is why only so few people know it.”

Kakashi nods, with a sidelong look at Genma. “Indeed.” He shrugs. “I, myself, have only known of it, despite being part of the Anbu when Minato was Hokage.” He frowns, trying not to dwell on the ‘why’.

Genma quirks an eyebrow, obviously reading him well. “The Yondaime only ever taught it to a few squads… I think he wanted to… play fair.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. 

Neji frowns. “Play fair?”

Genma shrugs, and then sighs. “The Yondaime killed a thousand shinobis in one instance, when he flashed from person to person. Probably by throwing his hiraishin kunai.” He shakes his head again. “Imagine if you could transport troops like that.”

Neji stares at him. “There would be no balance.”

Kakashi snorts. “No, it would definitely tip the scales of power.” He frowns, a weird premonition shivering down his spine, and he shares a glance with Genma. “Which is also why the knowledge of it is locked.” And you need a key. He frowns, wondering if Genma’s key is beneath the tattoo as well.

Neji quirks an eyebrow. “I’m surprised that it is locked, though… withholding a tool like that… a lot of people would call that treason.”

Genma snorts. “Oh yes.” He grins, sharply. “But I know he argued with the fact that Tobirama himself had come up with a lot of forbidden jutsus… and this is a derivation of Tobirama’s jutsu. So he just pointed them that way and people couldn’t or didn’t want to argue against the founding fathers…”

Kakashi exhales, in a rush. “Do you know what the derivation is? What it consists of?”

Genma nods, shifting the toothpick again. “Oh yes, the derivation is the lock itself.” He quirks an eyebrow. “You need a key.”

Neji tilts his head, the large lilac eyes watchful. “But I… do not have a key?”

Genma smirks, eyes twinkling. “How do you feel about getting an invisible tattoo?”

Kakashi grunts. “You know how to do it?”

Genma waggles his eyebrows. “So do you, right.”

Kakashi shrugs. “I know what it looks like.” So does Sora.

Genma tilts his head, reaches up to take the toothpick out of his mouth. Grins at Neji. “And I know the ink to use. So, who of us should do it?”

Neji blinks, slowly, and then shrugs, tone very dry. “If it’s invisible it doesn’t matter if it’s messed up?”

Kakashi snorts, and Genma laughs out, loudly, and then reaches up to clasp Neji’s shoulder. “Indeed.” He hums, shooting Kakashi a look. “Well then, lets go and tip the scales.”

 

Kakashi shivers, again.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He runs into Karin, Suigetsu and Sasuke on his way back from training lot 11, exhausted and yet truly elated. They had gone and done Neji’s invisible tattoo, and then had started practicing, with Neji catching on extremely fast. As was to be expected, of course, but it still helped to lighten Kakashi’s spirits a bit, after all the recent events. 

 

And so it’s with a small pang in his guts, but an endurable pang, that he sees Sasuke now, sitting on some boulders off to the side, eating lunch with his… team members. 

 

Kakashi hesitates, and then steps over, raising his hand. “Yo.”

Sasuke quirks an eyebrow, his dark eyes coming up slowly. There is still anger in them, but also something that Kakashi would say is close to acceptance, but obviously hard won, if his stiff body language is anything to go by. 

Kakashi smirks grimly. Yeah, I know the feeling.

Sasuke tilts his head, tone almost neutral, but laced with warning. “He’s not here.”

Kakashi hums, with a shrug. “I can see that.” He quirks an eyebrow. “Called to help?”

Sasuke nods, once.

Kakashi exhales, slowly, trying to find a way past the hostility between them. Not that I can blame him right now. It’s a good thing that he is so pissed at me, all things considered. It means he cares.

He exhales, makes his voice neutral with an effort, and looks at Karin and Suigetsu. “I hope the two of you have settled in a bit.”

Karin shrugs, and then pushes her glasses up. Her tone is defiant, challenging, though Kakashi has the distinct impression that it is a survival mechanism, firmly in place. “As much as you can settle in a place that’s been destroyed.”

Suigetsu snorts, and Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, silently conceding the point. 

He shrugs, amicably. “Yeah, well, the timing of your visit isn’t very good, that’s true.” He hesitates, and then sits down on a boulder, too, nodding at her. “Neji told me that your mom told you a lot about Uzushiogakure?”

Karin lowers her gaze, blushing, and then nods, silently.

Kakashi narrows his eyes. Huh. So the attraction does go both ways… Seems like Neji has a thing for reddish-haired kunoichis. I wonder if it is more than attraction. He blinks, with a smirk. “There are a few Uzumakis in this village… maybe you’d like to exchange notes with them?”

Sasuke interjects, tone cold. “Naruto knows batshit about his heritage though.”He snorts, some of the warmth in his voice returning, with a sidelong glance at her. “You could tell him the sky is red I guess.” 

Karin giggles.

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Yes, but there is also Yui-san, and a few others.”

Karin presses her lips together. “What good would it do to talk about what is lost though?” She raises her red eyes to his. “We cannot rebuild it, right?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Who knows?” He shoots a look at Suigetsu, who had been watching silently up until now. “Uzushiogakure was called Land of Whirlpools for a reason, there were lots of eddies in the waters off the coast of it…”

Suigetsu grins at him, sharp teeth flashing. “Rollercoaster rides.”

Kakashi snorts. 

Sasuke mumbles, ‘baka’. 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, and then shoots him a look, tone dry. “Still a stick up your ass I see.”

Karin chokes on the sip of soup she just took, hiding her laughter in the cough. 

Sasuke glowers at her, for a long moment, and then turns to Kakashi, tone acerbic. “Still trying to seem harmless, I see.”

Kakashi narrows his eye. He clicks his tongue, the words heavy, laced with double meaning. “Right now, I do not pose a threat to you.”

Sasuke clenches his jaw, looking away. 

 

Suigetsu clicks his tongue, tone carrying a deliberate whine. “Well, if I ever get pardoned I might just as well go and try to build something in what remains of Uzushiogakure… though I need to go and find the sword first.” He grins, sharply.

Kakashi hums. “Sword?”

Suigetsu waggles his eyebrows. “We went and picked up Kubikiribōchō.” His expression turns dreamy. “Such a magnificent sword.” His face falls a bit. “I’m not sure where it is right now, though.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “I see.” He shoots a look at Sasuke, who looks away, a bit sheepishly. So, went and showed them where we left it, hmm. I wonder if you traced even more of our footsteps. He sighs, through his nose. “Well, you’re one of the Mist’s… I believe Zabuza would be pleased.”

Suigetsu grins at him. 

Karin puts her bowl away, fidgeting a bit. “So, I…”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, silently.

She grimaces, but continues, bravely. “I was wondering I you could point out some of the key parts of the village to me.”

Ah. Like the Hyuuga complex? Kakashi blinks, and then gives her an eye-smile. “Sure.”

 

Sasuke interjects, tone collected, all things considered. “Itachi has asked for you.”

Kakashi nods, and then shoots Karin a look. “Why don’t we go for that walk now… and then I can go by Itachi.”

Sasuke nods, silently, and then gets up. He hesitates, for along moment, his tone almost offhand, but Kakashi is anything but. “Things seem to be a bit better.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, closing his eye for a moment. “I’m glad.”

Sasuke nods, and then leaves, walking away slowly, head held high.

 

Suigetsu waits till he is out of range, voice low. “He’s struggling.” He smiles, sharply. “We all are.”

Kakashi nods, and then pushes up. “Yes. We all are.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“You wanted to see me?”

Itachi nods, pushing himself up, still slowly, but Kakashi can see that the movements are stronger now, a lot more sure. 

He shoots Kakashi a look, from beneath somewhat messy hair. “Yes, Senpai.” He hesitates. “I wished to discuss Sasuke’s and my status.”

Kakashi nods, with a slight grimace. He pushes his hands into his pockets, and then steps over to some boxes serving as chairs when Itachi nods at them. He sits down on them, gratefully, the walk with Karin longer than anticipated, as she had kept making excuses to not go directly where she obviously wanted to go. It had been almost endearing. 

Kakashi wonders if he is really, truly also this transparent. God, I hope not. He snorts to himself, and then blinks, watching as Itachi settles into a comfortable position on his bed with a little sigh.

Kakashi frowns. “Your skin color is back, but you seem pretty exhausted.”

Itachi nods. “I was out for a long walk earlier with Sasuke and Naruto.”

Kakashi swallows, looking away for a moment. “I see.”

Itachi sighs, pulling the vest he wears instead of the Akatsuki cloak tighter. “I can understand, now.”

Kakashi tilts his head. “Understand?”

Itachi blushes, looking away. “How it must feel.”

“Ah.” Kakashi reaches up, rubs the bridge of his nose for a moment. “So I did interpret the signals correctly.”

Itachi snorts, just softly. “Apparently.” He grimaces, with a shrug. “I had not anticipated it. And now I cannot think of anything else.”

Kakashi hums, and then snorts. “Yeah, well, it’s a shit show.”

Itachi clears his throat, blushing even more. “Did she…”

Kakashi interjects, gently, but firmly. “You will have to talk to her.” He hesitates, and then adds, equally gently. “Just be aware that she is younger than you, too, and that you will have to answer to me if you should pressure her into this.” He clicks his tongue, shooting Itachi a look. “That is not a threat. Just a fact.”

Itachi ducks his head, just a bit. With a small smirk. “Understood.”

Kakashi looks at him, and then shakes his head, once, tone dry. “Still. It’s the tiniest bit funny.”

Itachi hums, the corner of his eyes crinkling. “Objectively, yes.”

 

They both chuckle softly, and then Kakashi shakes his head, with a sigh. “So. Your and Sasuke’s status.” He hesitates for a moment, voice a bit firmer. “I know that you were debriefed. I have read some of the reports.” He swallows, and then lowers his voice, tone almost inaudible. “Obito has been by to visit me.”

Itachi blinks, slowly, his voice very soft. “So it had indeed been him.”

Kakashi smiles, grimly. “You wanted to confirm it back then.” He never took off his mask around you?

Itachi nods. “Yes.”

Kakashi frowns. “Why?” He shrugs, tone low. “What tipped you off?”

Itachi frowns, reaching up to push a strand of hair back behind his ear. He shakes his head, once. “Little things. The way he behaved during the m… that night. The way he would seem desperately uninterested in Konoha, and yet base his decisions around Naruto and the village. The fact that…” Itachi sighs, and then returns his eyes to Kakashi’s. “The fact that his sharingan was the only one unaccounted for.” He clicks his tongue. “Before, at least.”

Kakashi hums, watching him closely. “You only said that he helped you with the… that night.” He narrows his eyes, but keeps his tone soft. “Who did you kill that night, Itachi.”

Itachi gasps soundlessly, looking away, a single tear dropping. His voice is toneless. “My parents. It was my duty.” He smiles, painfully. “But I felt every and each death.”

Kakashi exhales a shuddering breath. “I know.” Oh, Obito, and you went and killed the rest of them? What that must have done to you, despite it all. He swallows, letting the truth color his voice. “I am so sorry I could not protect you back then.”

Itachi shakes his head, slowly. “I know.” He shrugs, with a sniff. “The events that led to that night had been in motion for long years already.”

Kakashi nods, swallowing compulsively. “Yes, since before Naruto’s birth.” He snorts. “Arguably, ever since Konoha was founded.” He grimaces, staring unseeing into space. “I wonder how different it would have been if they’d made Madara Hokage, instead of Hashirama.”

Itachi weighs his head. “Maybe they wouldn’t have clashed, then.”

Kakashi nods. “Yeah, maybe.” Or maybe they would have clashed sooner, destroying it all before it could take hold. He frowns, sighing through his nose. “I heard there was a catalog of sharingan abilities in the Uchiha shrine?”

Itachi nods. “Yes. Only the clan elders and their successors were allowed to see it.”

Kakashi tilts his head. “Because of the rinnegan?”

Itachi smirks softly, and then nods. “Yes. I was very surprised to see it on the Pain that was Yahiko.”

Kakashi frowns. “Did you ever meet him? Or Nagato?”

Itachi shakes his head. “No. Konan served as a messenger, if needed. I only ever saw Yahiko and his eyes during the synchronization meetings that were needed to…” He hesitates, swallowing. 

Kakashi nods, continuing, softly. “That were needed to extract the bijous?”

Itachi nods, glumly. He sniffs, picking at a fluff on his pants. “I was very glad back then, that you and Jiraiya-san kept Naruto well protected.”

Oh yeah? Kakashi narrows his eyes. “But you and Kisame came for him nonetheless.”

Itachi smirks softly. “Though the distraction we set up for Jiraiya back then seemed perfect I expected the Sannin to look through it… and he did not disappoint. Naruto was never in any real danger.” He chuckles softly. “On the contrary to Kisame and myself, actually, since we were almost digested by a toad.”

Right. Kakashi nods, and then leans back a bit, with a frown. “Why did you join the Akatsuki back then, Itachi. Just to protect Sasuke?”

Itachi shakes his head. “No, though that was part of it. But he insisted. And I couldn’t refuse. There was always this implicit threat, hanging in the air. I tried to follow the orders, while bending them, too, for example like back then when I did not truly engage you when you came for Gaara.”

Indeed. Using doppelgängers of traitors instead… and still giving us a run for our money. Kakashi hums, voice quiet. “But you still helped them extract the bijou. Still slowed us down.”

Itachi grimaces. “The chakra flow had to be steady. There was no way I could pretend. Unfortunately.” He sighs, just softly. “I think that he… Obito, despite hating his own clan for giving up on him, for abandoning him… but he longed for his kin.” He shrugs. “He longs for connection.”

Kakashi snorts, gently, painfully, remembering his own weird conversations with Obito. “Yeah.”

 

They are both silent for a moment, dwelling on their own thoughts.

Eventually, Kakashi clears his throat. “I am not sure if we can fully pardon you.”

Itachi nods, and then shrugs. “Pardon Sasuke. That will be enough for me.” He clicks his tongue. “My death will serve as a lesson, and as a marker for this part of the history to be closed.”

Kakashi snorts, ignoring Itachi’s vaguely weirded out look, and then reaches up to rub his temple. “We’re not gonna kill you, Itachi.”

He sighs, locking their gazes, letting the humor shine through. “Even if… and that is a big if - even if Sakura would be able to forgive me if we did that…” He frowns, and then clicks his tongue. “The way of healing has proven much more successful, even a lot more lucrative, all things considered.” He shrugs. “I know that in our line of work, people die. And in this war… lots and lots of people will die.” He swallows, looking away for a long second. “But Itachi, I once had this discussion with Naruto that we only learn from our mistakes. And that is, per se, after the fact.”

He shrugs, and spreads his arms. “What good would it do if we killed you now?” He pulls a face, shakes his head. “Sasuke would hurt again, viciously, Sakura would hurt for the rest of her life, also. The only ones actually pleased would be some hardliners in the village and council, and, honestly, they are the ones who always pushed, and, lets be real, they are the ones actually responsible for this whole mess.” 

He breaks off, grimacing, raising his gaze to Itachi’s once more. “Still. We cannot fully pardon you, simply because of what the past is.” He clicks his tongue. “Just as we couldn’t fully pardon Orochimaru if we ever catch him, despite it all.”

Itachi frowns, with a quirk of his eyebrow. “Orochimaru?”

Kakashi waves at him, with a long sigh, feeling suddenly exhausted. “Long story.” He grimaces, with a shake of his head. “We will see. It might come to lifelong confinement, or limitation of movement, if you’re lucky to the village limits.”

Itachi blinks, and then smiles, just softly. “And I would be happy for it.”

Kakashi nods, but quirks an eyebrow. “Yeah, well, it’s not up to me.” He clicks his tongue. “But I’ll see what I can do.”

Itachi hums. “It’s not up to you yet, Senpai.” His eyes twinkle. “From what I heard.”

Kakashi grunts. “Oh, no, not you too.”

Itachi chuckles, quietly, and then shoots Kakashi a look. “I was always impressed that someone with your powers was so uninterested in the power itself.”

Kakashi grimaces, and then snorts. “Yeah, well, I guess that runs in the family. My father was pretty powerful, too, but he decided early on to focus on his family instead, on…” He trails off, his throat closing on the word ‘living’. 

And those with power broke him nonetheless. 

Itachi’s voice is gentle, a whisper. “If we make it through the war he will be old enough.”

Kakashi snorts again, and then reaches up to wipe at a sudden, surprising tear. “Yeah, and I will be definitely old.”

Itachi hums, and then grins. “Not that old though. Old enough to wear the hat with grace.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, and then gets up, shaking his head, tone deliberately light. “Why did we rescue you again?”

Itachi chuckles, and then sobers again. “Tenzou-san has been very quiet around me.”

Kakashi looks down at him, and then sighs. “It’s Yamato now, officially, and he’s…” He grimaces. “I don’t think he actually thought that much about that night back then.” He shrugs. “I mean, he was even younger. And it all came back with you.” He sighs, through his nose. “I’ll speak to him.”

Itachi inclines his head. “Thank you, Senpai.”

Kakashi nods, and then sighs. “Have you eaten yet?”

Itachi shakes his head, and then pushes up, slowly. “No.” He smirks. “It would be my pleasure to accompany you to dinner once more.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, and then snorts. “Think we can make them jealous?”

Itachi ducks his head, with a chuckle, and then shrugs, with a twinkle to his eyes. “Maybe?”

Kakashi grins, and holds the tent open for him. “Well, then. Let’s eat.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“You’ve been awfully quiet lately?”

Tenzou sighs, and then nods, putting his empty bowl away, while Kakashi sits down next to him. Shooting a look over at Itachi, who is sitting at another table, where he and Kakashi had eaten, far away enough not to be able to listen in. His dark eyes come up to Kakashi’s for a moment. “It’s difficult right now. I… remember that night. So does Yugao.”

Kakashi hums. “She does not want Itachi here?”

Tenzou shakes his head, slowly. “No. And… I cannot really blame her. Someone who went through that district and did that to children…” Tenzou grimaces. “No matter the reasons…” 

Kakashi swallows, watching Itachi sit there, hunched over, seeming small and frail. But you also know he did it to save the village… but the reason pales beneath what has happened, doesn’t it. He clicks his tongue, lowers his voice. “And yet you know the story. You know who our adversary is… do you still believe that Itachi did all that… alone?”

Tenzou presses his lips together, tone hard. “He let it happen. Agreed to let it happen. Made a deal for it happening.” He inhales, deeply, tapping his finger twice. “I just…” He shakes his head, falling silent.

Kakashi grimaces, softly. Yes. And so did our Hokage. So did we. He tries to keep the sting out of the words. “And yet you and I both, we have killed and hunted, long before we understood the reasons behind it.” He shoots Tenzou a look, with a quirked eyebrow. “Don’t tell me you were always aware of the repercussions. Evaluated the age of those we killed.”

Tenzou looks away, fidgeting.

Kakashi smirks, bitterly, looking down to the ground. “It always seems different, for oneself, doesn’t it.”

Tenzou hisses. “It was.” He grimaces, shaking his head. 

Kakashi reaches up, and rubs a hand over his face and mask. He knows he sounds exhausted. “We cannot continue on the path of revenge. This war will thin out our ranks already. We need people to learn from their mistakes. Make reparations.” He hesitates. “Besides…”

Tenzou shoots him a look when he trails off, mouth a thin line. “Besides?”

Kakashi exhales, deeply, with a shrug. “Sakura would never forgive us if we pressed for his death.”

Tenzou stares at him. His tone carries something Kakashi cannot place. “Sakura-chan?”

Kakashi shrugs. He clicks his tongue, tone acerbic. “Fate can be so funny, sometimes.”

Tenzou grunts. “Indeed.” 

They both stare unseeing at the ground for a long moment. 

Eventually, Tenzou frowns. “I still don’t know what to do with him… He’s…” 

Kakashi hums. “Rubbing you the wrong way?”

Tenzou nods, with a sheepish grin, while scratching his head. “It’s annoying the shit out of me to be honest.”

Kakashi snorts. “Yeah, well, that’s because you’re a good man.” He gives Tenzou an eye-smile. “And, personally, I’m glad for it.” He shrugs. “Itachi will have to work for the acceptance and the forgiveness.” He clicks his tongue. “By himself and others.” He exhales, shudderingly. “We both know that will be hard enough.”

Tenzou is silent for a long moment, before he nods, once, though his tone is still hard. “Will that be his only punishment?”

Kakashi shakes his head, slowly. “I’m not sure. Probably not.” He exhales. “But it won’t be capital punishment, that I’m pretty sure of.”

Tenzou exhales, too, in a rush. Tone tired. “Alright.” He hesitates, and then snorts. “At least I’ll be able to diffuse Yugao’s ire a bit with the bond information.”

Kakashi hums, vaguely amused for some reason. “She’s very intense?”

Tenzou smirks softly, his dark eyes twinkling. “She’s a lioness.”

Kakashi nods, remembering a similar comment in regards to Kurenai, seemingly so long ago. He clears his throat. “That’s good.” He grimaces, and then leans in, tone turning imploring. “Don’t spread the news in regards to Itachi and Sakura though… At least not yet. I’m dead otherwise.”

Tenzou snorts, and then shakes his head, once, with a sidelong glance. “And we don’t want that.”

 

Kakashi pulls a face. “I think Sasuke would prefer me that way right now.” 

Tenzou’s grin spreads, grows more real. “Yeah, well, he’ll come around.”

Kakashi grunts.

Tenzou frowns, watching the visible part of Kakashi’s expression tightly. “How is Naruto?”

Kakashi grimaces. “Hurt. Getting better. Furious, but…” He sighs, deeply, and then shrugs. “He came by. We talked. He knows.”

Tenzou quirks an eyebrow, tone a mix between incredulity and deadpan. “He knows??” He shoots a look around the space. “And he’s not here, with you?”

Kakashi smirks, grimly. “It’s complicated.”

Tenzou blinks. “Huh.” 

Kakashi clears his throat. He cannot keep all the sudden, fatalistic humor from his voice. “He actually thought that my bond might have been with you, since I didn’t say anything when I remembered Loran.”

There is no response, and after a moment Kakashi turns his head, only to find Tenzou stare at him, flabbergasted. Kakashi shrugs. “Well, I mean, theoretically…” He narrows his eyes, Tenzou still staring. “I see that leaves you shell-shocked. That bad, huh?”

Tenzou’s half open mouth snaps shut, and he wildly shakes his head, the head-frame he’s wearing glinting with the movement. He stammers a bit. “No, I mean, yes, I mean not like that, Senpai, I…” He sighs, deeply. “I just had this impulse to go and shake Naruto, very hard.”

Kakashi snorts. He swallows the bitterness down. “Well, yeah, don’t be too hard on him. Our bond is a very, very complicated one… and he hasn’t even recognized it yet.”

Tenzou frowns, rubbing his face, tone muffled. “You really think so? Still?”

Kakashi shrugs, with a long sigh. And then he chuckles. “After I recognized it I was helpless to resist it… I mean, I… I tried to concentrate on the other things, but… and you remember, that mission where I was used as a puppet to get at the sharingan?” Tenzou nods, and Kakashi clicks his tongue, with a shrug. “Naruto was flustered when his friends told him they knew. Absolutely flustered. It was a knee-jerk reaction.” He shrugs again. “I know for a fact that I don’t care anymore, since I remember. I only yearn.” And feel a million other things.

Tenzou frowns, and then shakes his head, slowly. “But it’s not compulsive, is it? I mean, you still decided…” He trails off.

Kakashi cackles harshly. “I still decided to be a better man?” He hisses. “Oh yes.” He swallows. “I’m fighting every second.”

Tenzou nods, slowly. “And it’s costing you.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away, staring at Itachi’s hunched over figure.

Tenzou follows his gaze, sighs, deeply, tone tired. “Just as it’s costing him.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Not quite the same, but…” Yes. Our decisions to do the right thing cost us.

Tenzou groans, deeply. “Ah, damn.”

Kakashi shoots him a look, with a quirked eyebrow.

Tenzou growls. “Now I cannot hate the idiot anymore.”

 

Kakashi snorts, and then chuckles, shaking his head. “Good.”

 

 

At least something.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Sensei!”

Kakashi raises his eyes from the pages of Icha Icha Tactics, locking them with Naruto’s excited ones, now suddenly very near, as Naruto has jumped up onto the branch of the tree Kakashi is sitting in to crouch in front of him, mobile face easily transmitting his agitation.

Kakashi snaps the book shut, with a frown. He tries not to let it show how relieved he is, that Naruto has sought him out… for whatever might have happened. “Naruto?”

Naruto flops down onto the branch, right in front of his crossed ankles, legs dangling down on either side of the branch. “Sensei, the toads just reverse summoned me. Right in the middle of my ramen, I was so pissed.” He snickers, and looks away for a moment, with a small frown. “But when I came back I was asked for an autograph… that was very weird.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, with a hum. “Well, you’re becoming famous?” The toads summoned you?

Naruto blushes, just a bit, and then shrugs, a bit sheepishly. “Yeah, well, it was still weird. Did anybody ever ask you for your autograph?”

Kakashi chuckles, and then shakes his head. “No. My legacy is dripping with blood, I don’t think it will be something that people will fawn over.”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “Now you’re playing stupid, Sensei. Of course they will, you’re awesome.”

Kakashi stares at him, and Naruto blushes, spectacularly. With a shrug.

Kakashi clears his throat. Naruto, I’m so grateful you’re making an effort. Let me make one, too. “I’m glad that…”

Naruto interjects, hastily. “Yeah, well, and anyways, the elder toad wanted to tell me of another one of his visions, you know.”

Kakashi swallows, pushing the instinctual pain at the quite obvious rejection down. Deep down. His voice is gruff. “I see.” He frowns. “What vision?”

Naruto exhales, swinging his legs a bit. “He said I would have to meet an octopus on an island that would guide me.”

Kakashi blinks, watching Naruto’s carefully expectant face. “I… see.” That matches with our plans of the rumors in regards to the shape of Killer-B‘s bijou are to be trusted. He clicks his tongue. “Anything else?”

Naruto shrugs. And then whispers, with a small blush. “They gave me the key.”

Kakashi tilts his head. “The key?”

Naruto licks his lips, eyes burning into Kakashi’s now. “The key to my seal.”

Oh. Kakashi stares at him, at the twitching whiskers, belying Naruto’s otherwise calm exterior. 

Kakashi exhales, with an effort. Lets his sincerity bleed through. “That is awesome.” It means they trust you enough to find your own path now… to find a way. 

 

Naruto hums, and then grimaces, with a chuckle. “I could have done with it not involving Gerotora forcing himself down my throat though.”

Kakashi blinks. And then croaks. “What?”

Naruto rolls his eyes, and then leans in, hands pressing on Kakashi’s shins. “Apparently the key needs to be in the body to be accessible when I want it, so he forced himself down my throat into whatever weird metaphysical space he‘s in now.”

Kakashi blinks. “But a key toad is…”

Naruto nods, with eyes opened almost comically wide. Whispering.“Right? I thought my throat would burst.”

Kakashi shivers, and stares, trying very, very, very hard not to imagine. 

Naruto stares back, gaze… Kakashi rips his gaze away, heart beating in his throat. His voice is gruff. “You’re pulling my leg.” You’re deliberately torturing me.

Naruto bites his lips. “Nope.” He leans even closer, the pressure on Kakashi’s legs increasing. His voice drops so low even Kakashi has to strain to hear it. “I’m glad I knew how to swallow past a constriction already.” The eyes narrow. “You know, swallow it down.”

Kakashi stares, caught. His voice is a croak when he finally finds some words. “Why are you…” Telling me this? Doing this? He swallows, compulsively. 

Naruto blinks, and then shifts, moving up and into Kakashi’s lap in one swift movement, legs still dangling down, hands on Kakashi’s shoulders. 

His eyes burn into Kakashi’s single visible one. “I’ve been thinking.”

Kakashi swallows, echoing, dumbly. “Thinking.”

Naruto nods, clicking his tongue. His tone is decidedly, carefully chipper. “Yeah, I mean, now that I know…” He hesitates, tilting his head. Kakashi tries to ignore the looks of the passer-bys below, feeling their gazes. Naruto continues, mercilessly, with a bit of a grin. “I mean, now that I know, now that we know, and now that you know about me, and Sasuke…” Naruto tilts his head, almost innocently. “We can now discuss things?”

Kakashi swallows, fighting the heat in his groin with all his being. Trying not to inhale too deeply. The words grate. “You call this discussing?”

Naruto grins, sharply, and then the fangs grow sharp, elongated, and Kakashi cannot help himself, heat pools in his gut. Naruto’s nostrils twitch. “I think I’ve earned the right to find things out by myself.” He tilts his head. “Haven’t I… Sensei?”

Kakashi exhales a shuddering breath, feeling light-headed. And bitter. “Sure. Just remember that things do not only bend though. Sometimes they break.” And not all can be fixed by kintsugi.

Naruto quirks his eyebrows, eyes glittering. “Things and people, yes.”

 

They stare at each other, for a long, long moment. 

And then Naruto moves back again, in one fluid movement once more, straddling the branch in front of Kakashi’s feet again.

Kakashi drops the book he’s been clinging to for his damned life down into his lap. Almost nonchalantly.

Naruto grins, dangerously. 

Kakashi swallows, tone a harsh whisper. “Enjoy having this power over me?”

Naruto inclines his head. “You asked me this before.”

Kakashi nods, looking away for a moment. “It’s still true.”

Naruto blinks, very slowly. Tone hard. “Yes.”

Kakashi nods again, with a small, brittle smile. “Talk will be all over town… sure that Sasuke won’t be pissed?” And you obviously don’t mind anymore.

Naruto shrugs, uncaringly. “I’ll be sure to redirect his energy.”

Right. Kakashi looks away, with a shiver. He clears his throat. “When exactly…” He trails off, swallowing the question down. When exactly have you become this sexually confident? He frowns, admitting to himself that Naruto had always been pushy, and pushing, and… This is only another extension of this behavior. Another facet. Another part of him that clicks into place. Kakashi blinks, watching Naruto watch him. And he is only doing it to me, because I am safe, despite it all. He’s using all the friction and all the knowledge he has of me, pushing my limits. 

To find his own.

He snorts.

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, blue eyes burning. “What is it?”

Kakashi shakes his head, slowly. “I just…” He smirks. “You know, Naruto, all things considered, this is incredibly you.”

 

Naruto snorts, and then giggles, some levity returning, somehow. He pushes the tip of his tongue to his front teeth for a moment. Pointing with a thumb at himself. “That is because I’m just incredible.”

It’s Kakashi’s turn to snort, and he does so, with a shake of his head. Letting humor color his voice. “And now you sound like Jiraiya.”

Naruto giggles again, and then leans in, waggling his eyebrows. “I still want to know what chapter the reference to you two is in.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow and then leans in, whispering. “No.”

Naruto groans, throwing his head back, but there is laughter in his voice. “Ah, come on, Sensei.”

Kakashi grins, and then pretends to be offended, raising the book to look at it, tone deliberately put on. “My sex life is none of your business, young man.”

Naruto snorts, and then leans forward one more time, hand on Kakashi’s knee this time. 

His eyes glitter, the voice breathless. “Not yet.”

 

And he’s gone, and Kakashi tries to breathe, breathe, while willing his instant hard-on down, goddammit, his heart hammering in his chest. 

 

 

The thought is vaguely funny.

 

 

 

I am so, so doomed.

 

 

 

 

But there is a tiny flame of hope there, somewhere, blooming in his chest, too. 

 

 

 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long time, and then decides to fan it, gently, circumstances be damned.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

"Here. I want you to take this along.“

Tenzou frowns, looking down at the blade in Kakashi’s hand, and then up at Tsunade, who watches grimly, before looking back at Kakashi. "Are you sure, Senpai?” He hesitates, before continuing. "I mean I have heard of these blades. There are only a few of them left…“

Kakashi nods. "Yes. Which is exactly why I want you to take mine with you… there is another one here. If anything happens…“ He trails off, words stuck on ‘I hope I can flash to you‘.  I could flash to him, as well, but to you… I need to be able to reach you, too.

Tenzou nods. "I understand.“ He carefully takes the hiraishin kunai from Kakashi and puts it away with a short nod. "Let’s hope we don’t need it.“

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. "Indeed.“

 

He inhales deeply and then turns to the others, standing in a little group a few meters off. 

Around a loudly exclaiming Guy, who raises his fist into the air right now, cheering. Aoba is rolling his eyes, while Naruto is giggling. 

Sasuke is standing there, next to him, close, with an indecipherable expression. 

He looks up, seeming to feel Kakashi’s gaze, and they look at each other for a long, long moment, and then Sasuke nods, once. 

Kakashi blinks, tearing his gaze away.

 

Itachi’s voice is low. “It must be terrible for you to let him go.”

Kakashi swallows, inclining his head, voice low. “It cannot be very comfortable to let Sasuke go either...”

Itachi hums. “No.” He clears his throat, drawing the blanket closer around himself. “But it’s not the same. And…” He shrugs. “I know Naruto will keep him safe.”

Kakashi chuckles, drily. “Yeah.” He shoots Itachi a look. “Still feeling cold all the time?”

Itachi shrugs again, lightly. “My metabolism was compromised for years. It makes sense that it takes a while to heal.”

Kakashi nods, with a hum. “Indeed.” He frowns, watching Naruto grin up at Guy now, listing everything he packed, to Sasuke rolling his eyes. He clicks his tongue. “When you encountered Naruto back then… what did you two discuss?”

Itachi weighs his head. “I just… wanted to know why he chased so diligently after Sasuke.” He snorts, tilting his head at the small group. “Guess I should have seen this coming.”

“Hmmm.” Kakashi grimaces, crossing his arms. 

Itachi smirks, and then leans in a bit. “I also gave him a crow.”

Kakashi frowns, turning to look at Itachi. “A crow?”

Itachi nods, while exhaling deeply. “Yes. I… wanted to give him a chance to counter Sasuke’s Mangekyo should he activate it against Naruto… I conjured a physical manifestation of the crow I put the power of Shisui’s eye into… and I gave it to Naruto. It’s programmed to counter a Mangekyo activation with Kotoamatsukami. I decided to do that after the test I put him through when you came for Gaara.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly. Such a nice test. I bet the men you used as puppets would disagree. He frowns. But then they were traitors, were they not? They would have been dead anyways. The words come haltingly. “That is… nice. I guess.” He quirks an eyebrow. “So where is the crow now? I mean, I don’t see it circling round?”

 

Itachi opens his mouth to respond, but Naruto interjects, his tone a heavy mix between glee and viciousness, appearing in front of them, obviously having stepped up to them sneakily. “He made it go down my throat… it was almost as big as the toad later. Good practice I guess.”

Kakashi’s gaze snaps to his, the big blue eyes sparkling with mischief and affection. What?

Naruto grins, tongue between his teeth. “I told you I had practice swallowing something like that down already.”

Itachi coughs, loudly, averting his face, to try to hide his amusement, to no avail.

Kakashi stares. Glowers. Naruto grins, while everybody else is not breathing.

Sasuke sighs eventually, loudly, stepping closer with crossed arms. His tone is acerbic. “If I didn’t know better, I would say you’re flirting, teme.”

Kakashi’s gaze snaps to him, but Naruto just grins, nose scrunching. His voice carries a leer, waggling his eyebrows. And no apology. “But you do know better, right.”

Sasuke’s gaze gentles, just a bit, while a smile tugs at the corners of his mouth. He reaches up to push his knuckles over Naruto’s cheek, and the tender gesture hurts, makes Kakashi avert his gaze, hastily. 

Wondering what exactly Sasuke and Naruto may talk about.

What and how much they discuss. 

If there are any secrets between them, now.

 

Sasuke’s voice is low. “Come. We want to leave now.” He looks up at Kakashi for a moment, expression kind and knowing, and then steps over and between Naruto and Kakashi, deliberately, and Kakashi takes an instinctual step back, lowering his gaze. 

With an effort. 

 

Deferring, fighting down his own instincts, within an inch of his life.

 

Sasuke draws Itachi into a careful embrace, and Kakashi stares at the ground, unseeing. 

 

Burning.

 

Fingers on his jaw and chin make him look up, the blue eyes capturing his gaze, unrelentingly. 

Naruto stares at him, like that, for long moments, and Kakashi lets him, unable to move, unable to do anything against that simple, possessive gesture. 

This gesture, that Iruka uses, too.

This gesture, that marks him, somehow.

 

He can feel the weight of the gazes of the people around.

 

Naruto smirks, eventually, voice a whisper. “The plants are in the shelters, no need to look after them this time.”

Kakashi swallows, with a soft shrug. Carefully not dislodging the fingers. “They’re better taken care of than I could possibly do then.”

Naruto hums, with a slight frown. He licks his lips, his voice almost inaudible, just between them, despite Itachi and Sasuke hovering close. “What if I can’t…” He trails off, biting his lips. 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, and then steps in, breaking the hold after all, and enveloping Naruto in a hug, pushing his face into that smell, the smell he needs, the feeling he needs, pushes all his feelings into the words. “I believe in you.”

Not saying the words he wants to say.

 

But knowing Naruto hears them, nonetheless.

 

I love you.

 

 

 

 

And Naruto sinks into his arms, uncaringly, voice breaking on the word. “Sensei.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

The ship vanishes, a dot on the horizon, and blood drips from the sharingan, the pain of overuse from recording too detailed for too long the only thing tethering Kakashi to reality.

 

 

 

Kakashi doesn’t wipe the blood away, ignoring the looks.

 

 

He turns his feet back to Konoha, and then back to the tower, to attend a fucking meeting for new friggin’ headbands.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

The messenger turtle arrives, suddenly, after a few weeks, disoriented and unable to speak and Kakashi does not think, does not ask Tsunade who stares at it in alarm, just does, reality blurring.

 

 

 

Nothing, nothing, bitter and cold.

 

 

 

Kakashi crashes into Tenzou, who sits on the deck at the stern of the ship. 

 

“Oof.”

 

Kakashi pushes up, eyes wild. Tone frantic. “What is it. Why have you called?”

Tenzou grunts, pushing up slowly, rubbing his neck. He grimaces. “Called?”

Kakashi glowers at him. “The messenger turtle. It arrived earlier. I came. What happened?”

Tenzou blinks, tilting his head. “Messenger turtle, Senpai?”

Kakashi gnashes his teeth. Tries to keep the ire contained, the ire that burns with irritation and adrenaline, making himself slow down a bit. “Yes. Guy sent his messenger turtle. What happened?”

 

Tenzou blinks, and then very slowly turns his head and looks up to the bow of the ship, where something green and miserable is hanging across the railing. 

His tone is careful. “I think that may have been a misunderstanding?” He shrugs, while Kakashi stares at Guy, who is retching, again. “I mean, we had a few smaller adventures, but…” He shrugs again.

Kakashi blinks, slowly, and then flops down on the deck, rubbing his face. 

He grunts. “I see.” He sniffs, and then exhales, all the energy leaving him suddenly, the soft wind nice and soothing, lulling, matching the tranquil, moonlit waters. There’s hardly any movement, and Kakashi frowns, shooting the still retching Guy a look. 

Grimacing.

 

Tenzou nods, seeing the look, tone low. “He started getting sick as soon as we started out… I don’t think it’s actually the movement, more the fact that we are, indeed, on a ship.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, pulling a face. “I see.” Poor Guy. He shoots Tenzou a look. “You could have actually called and asked for replacement?”

Tenzou shakes his head, with a sigh. “No, he insisted. He said he’s watching over Naruto and nothing, not even his own body, can change that.”

Kakashi snorts, and then smiles softly. “Yep, that sounds like him.”

Tenzou smirks. And then tilts his head down at the deck. “He’s sleeping. It’s hard enough to have him up here during the day, he’s bored out of his mind, and letting everyone know, too.” Kakashi snorts, while Tenzou rolls his eyes. “I’ve none too subtly told them to hole up during the night.” He clicks his tongue. “And I’ve made their cabin soundpr…” He trails off, blushing, furiously.

 

Kakashi tries to relax. And keep the fire from his voice. “I see.”

Tenzou fidgets. “They’re teenagers, you know. Almost adult teenagers. I mean…”

Kakashi’s tone is too light, caustic. “Yeah, I remember, thank you, Tenzou.”

Tenzou mumbles. “Yamato, Senpai.”

Kakashi doesn’t answer.

 

Eventually Tenzou speaks again, tone careful. “Will you return immediately or stay a while?”

Kakashi hesitates, watching the smooth surface of the water for a long moment. He exhales, shaking his head once. “I’m not sure I can return right away - while I have no real memory of the trip I… know that it took a moment. And that I know that I don’t have the energy yet for the return trip.”

Tenzou nods, with a hum. “I see.” He shrugs. “Well, we’re almost there anyways. I received a note via a sea gull earlier.” He turns his head to shoot a look at Guy. “I’m actually quite glad.”

Kakashi nods, with a sigh. 

 

And then Tenzou reaches up, a bit hesitantly, and bonks Kakashi over the head.

Lightly.

 

Kakashi blinks, flabbergasted, staring at him, and then it clicks, and he grins, broadly. “You remember.”

Tenzou snorts, ducking his head. “I do, now.”

Kakashi tilts his head, tone vaguely amused, while reaching up to rub the smarting spot. “When did you remember?”

Tenzou shrugs, with a small grin. “Just the other day… the sun glinted off the water, and I stared at the mast, and I thought that it had glinted off the towers of Loran, too, and bam, there it was.”

Kakashi chuckles, quirking an eyebrow. He clicks his tongue. “And? Thoughts?”

Tenzou hums. “The Yondaime was truly something else.”

Kakashi swallows, the pain beautiful for a long moment. His voice cracks on the words. “He was.” He swallows again, past the constriction in his throat. “So was Kushina.” And the others.

Tenzou nods, voice low and teasing. “And you crushed so hard on Naruto. Right there. Pretending so hard not to care…” He snickers. 

Kakashi colors, viciously. “Yeah, well…” He trails off, to Tenzou chuckling softly.

Tenzou sobers slowly, running his fingers along the lines of wood on the deck. “As Anbu, I can totally understand the Yondaime’s reasoning…” He looks up, shares a look with Kakashi, who blinks the sudden tears away. “But as a fath… but with the experience of knowing Aiko…” His voice drops to a whisper. “To know all this and to… let it happen…”

Kakashi shudders, looking away for a long moment. His voice is raw when he speaks again. “I never understood the pain in his eyes, after. I mean, I was still very young, and stupid, but…” He grimaces. 

 

And then he changes the subject, with an effort, but also with delight. “So. Aiko sees you as her father?”

Tenzou blushes, looking away, and then reaches up to pinch the bridge of his nose for a moment. He chuckles. “Yeah, well. I…” He shoots a look at Kakashi. “We want to make it official. After the war.”

Kakashi grins, broadly, and then reaches out, drawing Tenzou into a half-embrace. “That makes me so happy.”

Tenzou ducks his head. “Thank you, Senpai.” He chuckles, and then sobers, slowly. “I hope we’ll make it.”

So do I. Kakashi blinks, and then sniffs, not answering. 

Tenzou shoots him a look. “How far are the preparations?”

Kakashi drops the arm again, with a sigh, pulling his legs up and holding them with his arms. “Another two weeks, or so, maybe. The weapons have arrived, so have the new hitai-ates. We’re waiting for some provisions still. The headquarters will be in Kumogakure.”

Tenzou nods, and then frowns. “The civilians?”

Kakashi shrugs, with a grunt. “The shelters. We have no idea where and how the Zetsus will attack…” He grimaces. “And the kids are already used to it, and have set up camp there so to speak, so Iruka thought it would make sense to just stay there. We‘re sending some of the older ones to Sora and others though. They’re really excited about that.” He snorts. “They set up a few rooms for school for those staying already, to everybody’s… delight.”

Tenzou snorts, softly. “Oh, damn.”

 

Kakashi smiles, and then looks at the lightening up horizon. His tone is a bit wistful. “Another day.”

Tenzou hums, leaning in to bump into Kakashi, gently, on purpose. “If I remember correctly, it’s your birthday today.”

Kakashi frowns, unable to pinpoint the emotion the comment elicits. “Yeah. 31. Imagine that.”

Tenzou grunts, laying down on the deck. Tone dry. “We’ll have to get you a cake.”

Kakashi shakes his head once, tone dry. “Don’t you dare.”

Tenzou chuckles. “Well, I got a big cake last month. Walnut cream pie.” He sighs dreamily.

Kakashi smirks softly. “Good.” He turns his head, quirks an eyebrow. “I don’t like sweets anyways.”

Tenzou shrugs, with a small grin. “Ah, well, you’ll have to suck it up anyways, Senpai, just wait until I tell Naruto what day it is.”

Kakashi grunts. Repeating. “Don’t you dare.”

Tenzou grins, eyes closed. “Just imagine all the fuss he’ll make.”

Kakashi growls. “Tenzou….”

Tenzou clicks his tongue, tone vaguely admonishing. With a grin. “Yamato, Senpai.”

Kakashi glowers at him.

Tenzou opens one eye, shoots him a look. “Well, you know, since you’re here already and have to wait until you can return you can just enjoy your break, right.”

Kakashi blinks, and then looks over at the rising sun for a long moment.

And then he sighs, deeply, and shuffles to lay down on the deck as well, with a sigh. “You’re probably right.” Though I might need to send Tsunade a message. In a moment.

Tenzou smirks. “I usually am.”

And Kakashi grins. “Shut up, Tenzou.”

Tenzou cackles. His voice carries his smirk. “Just one more month, too.“

 

 

And Kakashi shakes his head and closes his eyes, basking in the still cool air and golden light.

 

 

Just a moment.

 

 

Just this single moment.

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Naruto literally doesn’t give a shit, squealing when he sees Kakashi, flying into his embrace. 

Despite everything. 

Kakashi chuckles, lightly patting his back, while trying to ignore Sasuke’s vaguely pinched expression. Yeah, yeah, I totally get it. I would feel the same. He swallows, and steps back, inhaling deeply as he does so. Shivering with want. 

Missing Naruto, immediately. 

 

He smiles the feeling away. “Easy, easy, Naruto. It’s only been a few weeks?“

Naruto grins at him, eyes alight, reaching out to shake him a bit. “Happy birthday, Sensei!”

Kakashi blinks, and then turns his gaze at Tenzou, shooting him a withering look. “I hate you.”

Tenzou grins, crossing his arms with a sidelong gaze at Aoba. His voice sounds almost sincere. “It’s too bad we don’t have the ingredients for a big cake. I hear Kakashi adores a good sugar-rush.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. 

Naruto exclaims, loudly, clapping his hands. “Oh, we have to find a way to get you something special!”

Guy calls over, still keeping the railing in a death grip, stammering breathlessly around obvious bouts of nausea. “Just… ugh… just send the… blergh, just send the ninken, my… my rival.”

Tenzou pipes up, helpfully. “Right, you do need to send the Godaime a report, don’t you.”

Sasuke’s dark eyes are glinting with mischievous humor, deeply drenched in vaguely mean gloating. “And soon.”

Kakashi glowers, and then sighs, defeatedly, when none of the people around him make any move of moving away. Or looking somewhere else. “Fine.”

He bends down. “Kuchyose no jutsu.”

Pakkun appears in a puff of smoke. “Boss.”

Kakashi opens his mouth, but Naruto beats him to it, dropping to his knees in front of the little dog, gesticulating wildly.

His voice matches his obvious excitement, word tumbling over themselves. “Pakkun, so good to see you. Please let baa-chan know that everything is alright. And we need you to go and get some ingredients for a cake for us, since it’s Kakashi’s birthday!!”

Pakkun blinks at him. Echoing, a bit taken aback. “Ingredients.”

Kakashi tries. “Yeah, well, never mind, just tell the Godaime everything is fine and that I’ll be back soon, and…”

Tenzou interjects, tone gleeful. “And then go by Yugao please, and ask her to give you the ingredients for the cake she made for my birthday, only with chocolate. I know she always has the basics at home.” Everybody looks at him, and he blushes, softly, stammering a bit. “She’s a really good cook?”

Naruto grins at him. “Oh, I didn’t know you had a sweet tooth, Sensei Yamato.”

Tenzou’s blush deepens, his expression vaguely sheepish. “Yeah, well.” He shrugs, and then leans down to Pakkun, with a loud whisper. “And ask her for some candles, too.”

Kakashi grunts, pained. “That’s really not necessary?” And chocolate? Chocolate? You know of my seal, why do you…. Ah. Kakashi blinks. You want to rewrite the emotions connected to the taste. The thought changes inflection, into vaguely amused annoyance. Ass.

Sasuke’s dark eyes glint. “Yes it is.”

Kakashi shoots him a skunk eye. And then another one at Tenzou. 

Naruto grins up at him, while scratching Pakkun, vigorously. “And of course it would be cool if you would all come, too?”

Pakkun grunts, undulating into the scratching fingers while pretending to be annoyed. “I’ll see if the others want to come.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “See you later, then, boss.”

Kakashi nods, with a deep sigh. “Yeah.”

Naruto reaches to scratch Pakkun’s belly for a moment, and then the little dog vanishes with another puff of smoke, and Kakashi stares glumly at the spot he was in, wishing his pack could just reverse summon him, too. Like the toads. 

Naruto chuckles quietly. “You’re wishing you could go with him.”

Kakashi shrugs, a bit listlessly. “That transparent, huh.”

Naruto frowns, sitting back on his haunches. “Why don’t you ce…”

Guy interjects, tone imploring but still stammering. “That… may be… a tale for… another time.”

Kakashi grimaces, sending him a thankful look.

Naruto blinks, while Tenzou frowns, shooting him a look. Sasuke tilts his head.

Aoba sighs, deeply, and then claps his hand. “Well then. Time to clean out the galley.”

 

Naruto groans.

 

It’s Kakashi’s turn to grin. 

Just the tiniest bit meanly.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

All in all, the cake isn’t half bad.

 

Kakashi can see that Tenzou has obviously had a lot of practice baking, with Yugao of course, and Naruto was obviously ecstatic to help.

 

Which had given Kakashi time to dangle his feet over the railing next to Guy, far enough and upwind from him to not get sick from the smell as well, but close enough to try to extend some kind of comfort, by sheer presence.

At some point, Guy had even smiled, just a bit.

 

That had been right before Naruto had showed him the freshly baked, and still steaming cake.

 

At that point all had been lost, and Guy had gone fully green, waving Kakashi away, firmly. Hastily. 

 

 

 

But, seriously, the cake itself isn’t half bad.

Not too sweet either. 

 

Obviously hastily put together, and uneven, vaguely botched and slanted.

 

But it’s a cake, for Kakashi.

One that his friends and Naruto had made in a way too small, hastily upgraded somehow galley.

For him.

 

 

Kakashi had felt dangerously unmoored when they’d shoved it at him. 

With a candle on it, too.

 

 

There is chocolate around Naruto’s mouth now, and Sasuke laughs at him, reaching up to wipe the smudge away. 

Tenzou’s eyes are watching him, dark and kind.

 

Kakashi blinks, looking away, remembering other cakes. Remembering another, very special cake, long ago. One with silver frosting on it. 

‘Silver, like your hair.’

 

A cake that had been meant as a means to soften the blow. And had only made it worse.

Kakashi blinks, staring down at his slice of chocolate cake now.  Or what’s left of it.

 

“What is it, Sensei?”

Kakashi looks up, looks at Naruto’s burning blue eyes, eyes that carry laughter in them right now. He pastes an eye-smile on. “Just remembering another cake.” Cakes, actually. He swallows.

Naruto blinks, and then something in his expression sobers, while his gaze flits up to Kakashi’s hair for a moment. “Yeah, I remember that, too.”

Kakashi frowns, and then nods, once. “It’s been a while.”

Naruto nods, face serious now, but kind. “It has.” He blinks. “I’m almost an adult.”

Kakashi smiles, painfully. “So they say.”

Naruto frowns, tone vaguely peeved. “You don’t agree?”

Kakashi chuckles, shaking his head, once. “No, I mean, yes, I mean…” He sighs, reaching up to rub at his forehead for a moment. “I know you’re legally an adult, soon.” Whatever that may mean for us, then. And our bond. He swallows. “But it will be a while yet until you know what that means.”

Something stubborn enters Naruto’s features. His tone is flat. “You don’t think I know what I’m doing.”

Not as much as I do… which is based in experience, solely. Experience you need to gain still. Kakashi sighs, and then reaches forward, placing a hesitant hand onto Naruto’s shoulder. “Naruto, if I may…” He hesitates, and then clicks his tongue. “My wish is that if and when…”, he trails off, swallowing compulsively, lowering his voice so the words are only audible between them, “if and when you ever come to me… you will know what I meant.”

Naruto blinks, and then tilts his head, with a bit of a scoff. “But how and when could I possibly know what you meant? I mean everybody is different? I cannot know what you meant?”

But you know what is in Sasuke’s heart, don’t you. Kakashi smiles, a bit painfully. “I know.” He shrugs. “Still.”

Naruto stares at him for a moment, and then turns on his heel and walks away, over to the dozing ninken, shaking his head.

 

Kakashi stares after him, feeling glum.

 

Sasuke’s voice pulls him from his thoughts. “Back then you gave me one of his plants.”

Kakashi frowns, turning to face him, watching the almost cold and aloof expression mix with something akin to affection. 

Sasuke smirks, just gently, though his tone stays hard. “I put it in Sakura’s room instead, when she was out.” Sasuke’s eyes narrow, tone carrying a faraway note. “I debated letting it die at first… simply because you had demanded of me that I would not. I did not understand what you meant by it. Not then.” He hesitates, and then adds, tone gentling. “Not for long years.”

Kakashi swallows, looking away. So that is why that plant seemed familiar… threads, threads, connected, everywhere.

Sasuke clicks his tongue, shooting a look at Naruto, who is leaning on the railing now, glowering at the water. “I know, more than he does, that you are but a man.” Kakashi frowns, hearing Iruka’s voice for a moment, before Sasuke continues. “I discussed you with Itachi. Forgiveness does not come easy, not with wrongs like these.” He snorts, looking away for a moment, the fine black hair glinting bluish brown in the sun. “Itachi insisted that I forgive you.” His voice lowers. “Forgive him.” Sasuke swallows. “You tried to save me. And I hated you for it.” He chuckles, quietly. “He tried to save me. And I hated him, too.”

Sasuke inhales, deeply, and then he steps closer, just a bit. “He is glad to have you here, even beyond the promise of the bond.” He clicks his tongue. “Especially beyond the promise of the bond.”

Kakashi swallows, unable to answer. His head and heart feel empty.

Sasuke tilts his head, the black eyes seeing too much. Tone carrying vague humor. “You are our Sensei.”

Kakashi exhales, the words scratching in his throat. “Yours, too?”

Sasuke smiles, sharply. “Of course. We are very alike, after all.” His face falls, a bit, voice dropping to a whisper, raw, and full of heat. “I know you could take him from me, if you only made up your mind to do so.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a moment, and then sniffs, blinking rapidly. Unable to say anything to that.

Sasuke smiles, viciously, teeth flashing. “But apparently there’s love outside bonds, right.”

Kakashi grimaces, and then hisses, stepping forward and pulling Sasuke into an one-arm embrace, surprising them both. 

He exhales shudderingly, and then chuckles, letting the sincerity color his voice. “I’m glad you’re back, Sasuke.” He clears his throat. “I’m… glad you’re with him. Despite everything. He…” He grits his teeth but pushes the words out, knowing them true nonetheless. “He needs you right now, more than he needs me. He needs someone who is like him, his level, his age, his…” He trails off, not knowing what else to say. 

Sasuke is a bit stiff in the embrace, but gradually relaxes into it, with a sigh. His voice is dry. “He needs someone who tells him when he’s being stupid.”

Kakashi snorts, and then closes his eyes, for a long moment. “Yes.”

 

And so do I.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi shares a long look with Guy when they step onto the shell of the huge turtle, silently congratulating the Hidden Cloud for choosing a moving island as their destination.

Though the others don’t seem to notice that, loudly wondering about the rocky spikes around the small jungle. 

 

Naruto is next to him, a fact that Kakashi does not have to check with his senses anymore, his body recognizing the other with instant longing now.

A feeling that transcends the tattoo, too.

 

Naruto clears his throat, addressing Kakashi carefully. “You’re not coming with us, are you, Sensei?”

Kakashi blinks and then shakes his head, slowly. “No.” He exhales, before turning to Naruto. 

He reaches up, slowly, feathering the tips of his fingers over a whiskered cheek, trying to see everything and nothing, just an impression, now, please, I cannot take another goodbye.

He swallows, dropping his hand. “Naruto, I…” He shakes his head, with a chuckle.

Naruto blinks at him, big blue eyes filled with sorrow. 

Kakashi nods, and then forces himself to speak. “Naruto, the fox within you is raging, we know that. But it may be angry also.”

Naruto frowns at the distinction, and then nods, once, while looking away unseeing, the others unloading the ship a few meters off. “Right. We talked about that. You said that it might loathe being imprisoned.” His voice drops to a whisper. “Used.”

Kakashi shrugs, and then sighs, tiredly. “Wouldn’t you be?” Aren’t we all dead tired of being used?

Naruto frowns, a petulant expression entering his features. “But it’s not my fault.”

Kakashi snorts, gently, drily. “No.” No, it is not. He clicks his tongue. “Still. To… In order to find a way… you will have to accept your own rage first I bet.” Your own anger.

Naruto’s face twists, in a moment of distinct pain. “Accept my inner darkness.”

Kakashi whispers, there between them. “It’s black tar, fueling the rage in ones soul. But this thing in you already rages, already fights. Don’t feed it.”

Naruto snorts, tone an acerbic whisper now. “And what should I do with all the pain, and the memories, and the rage, and the hurt…” He grimaces. “Huh? What am I supposed to do with all that?”

Kakashi smiles, painfully. “Shove them at me. Embrace their existence, and… shove them at me.”

Naruto crosses his arms, scoffing.

Kakashi swallows, his throat clicking. “You are loved. You know that.”

Naruto grunts, without answering.

 

“You are.”

Kakashi blinks slowly, and then turns to Sasuke, who steps up to them now, expression hard but carrying this hint of apology for interrupting, too.

Naruto blinks, but some of his own expression lights up nonetheless, and he nods, with a sniff.

Sasuke tilts his head. “Your light has proven stronger than all the dark fuel Orochimaru put into me. It will prove stronger than whatever you will need to overcome, here, too.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, the feeling a simmering ball of gratitude. Thank you, Sasuke.

Sasuke grins suddenly, something warm entering his features. “It’s a shame it’s so spiky here, though. I could have summoned Aoda and we could have rode in otherwise.”

Naruto snorts, eyes lighting up again. “Oh yes, that would have been cool.” 

Sasuke smirks, his eyes flitting back and forth on Naruto’s. “He’s dark… though his scales can glint like ivory, especially when they’re tipped up when he’s bristling with rage, or something.”

Naruto grins.

Kakashi frowns, something nagging at the back of his brain. 

Sasuke continues, tone soft now, warm. “But tipping the scales makes him vulnerable, so he rarely does that, though it looks extremely beautiful.”

Naruto chuckles. “Shame.” 

 

Tipping the scales…

Kakashi doesn’t recognize his own voice. “There can be strength in vulnerability.”

Both sets of eyes snap to him, and Kakashi stares straight ahead, unseeing. “There is always beauty to exposing oneself.” And terror. 

They’re frowning now, staring at him.

Kakashi shrugs, feeling weird. The words come by themselves. “And to… tip the scales of power, you sometimes have to give up.” Lay your life on the line. Sacrifice that which you value most. He shivers. Let it go.

Sasuke blinks, and then frowns, deeply, slowly shaking his head. 

Naruto’s voice comes haltingly. “Sensei… are you alright?”

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, and then he nods, reopening them to Naruto’s blue ones. He clicks his tongue, suddenly knowing what he has to say. “Be the man I didn’t know how to be.”

Find a way to conquer… no accept the darkness.

Naruto blinks, very slowly. “Ooookay?”

Kakashi smiles sharply, and then steps in, both his hands on Naruto’s jaw, tilting Naruto’s head down to press a kiss to Naruto’s forehead. He mumbles the words against the skin. “I will see you soon.”

 

He steps back, nods at Sasuke and closes his eyes against the pain, reaches and then… 

 

 

Nothing, nothing, cold and bitter.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi wants it to last eternally.

 

 

 

Chapter 38: Cross my heart and hope to die

Notes:

Supposedly “the war” took only two days in “Naruto time”. But it was ~240 episodes/chapters long, and lots and lots of flashbacks.
I’m obviously going to put my own twist onto these… two days, it’ll hit quite differently imho, though some of the big events will still happen. Just differently.
Also, there will be no flashbacks (just one memory I found cute to include here). Ahem :)) (Some of them were really beautiful but it was a LOT imho. The same goes for the dreams).
With Sasuke on their side from the beginning this time and them knowing it is and the connection to Obito… 😈🙃

There was also a bit of a time skip in the last chapters, just as a note, because it did take a while to prepare etc. It’s a year between Pain and the actual war, since Kakashi’s birthday is a month before Naruto’s.

While writing it I ALSO realized that I had to streamline the back-and-forth of the war even more, because there’s like… too much happening for it to detail the emotional impact that I’m going for, if that makes sense. And if I had detailed it as in the manga/anime, especially in regards to side characters and army, this would have been a 20 chapter arc also.
So I have split it into two main chapters… this one, with the ‘preliminaries’ (and closest to canon imho) and the second, with the ‘main event’.
And then, the finale and aftermath. 😜
I did not forget the „other“ characters, no worries. But we’ll get back to them a bit later.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

“Senpai, so nice of you to come by!”

Kakashi nods, with a small eye-smile, genuinely glad to see her. He drops his gaze to the toddler on her hips, the big-eyed little girl watching him with alertness.

Kakashi winks at her. 

While clenching his hand on the sword wrapped in a cloth.

The girls ducks her head, and Yugao chuckles, while stepping back to let him in. “Do come in, Senpai. I didn’t expect any visitors, so…”

Kakashi waves her off. “Please, no apologies.” 

He follows her into the living room, sits down with her, watching her put down Aiko to play with her toys, which are literally everywhere. He nods at the little girl. “She’s got his hair color.” He looks up at her. “And your eyes.”

Her eyes crinkle. “Yes.” She swallows, shooting a look at the wrapped sword. “I wouldn’t know where I’d be if she wasn’t…” She exhales a shuddering breath. “And without him, either.”

Kakashi smiles at her. “He’s a good man.”

She smirks, while ducking her head. “He is.”

Kakashi leans back a bit, tone vaguely teasing. “He is afraid of Hayate hunting him in afterlife though.”

Yugao laughs out loud, startled, and ending in a snicker, while Aiko looks at her in alertness, before returning to her play, when Yugao bends down to give her a quick kiss to the forehead. 

Yugao shakes her head, once. “More like squeeze him in thanks for eternity.”

Kakashi hums. “That’s what I think, too.”

Yugao smirks, and then blinks, her big eyes coming up to his. “Did you see him?”

Kakashi frowns, wondering if she knows about the mission. Probably not. “When I was dead?” She nods, a bit haltingly, and he shakes his head. “No, I didn’t really see anyone… I was in the vestibule, not really passed on.” He grimaces, looking away. “I was sent back.”

Yugao nods, silently, fidgeting. Her voice sounds faraway. "It never really stops, you know. It can be dampened and I am very happy with Tenzou, and her, but…“

Kakashi sniffs, and nods, with a sigh. "Yeah.“

Yugao shoots him a look. "I hadn’t really anticipated you managing this long, you know.“

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head. He clicks his tongue. "There are good and bad times, I guess.“

Yugao hums. "Still.“ She sniffs, raising her eyes to his, her inflection changing just slightly. "Will you protect him in this war?“

Kakashi quirks his eyebrows, knowing she is not talking about Naruto. "I‘ll try.“ He shoots a look at Aiko, who is babbling now, rolling a ball all over the room. "You’re not on active roster.“

Yugao smiles, vaguely sadly. "No. But, Senpai, I… couldn’t fight anyways. The desire to raise my sword has left me when you took the mask from me.“ Her voice drops to a whisper. “Even if you gift me a new one now, I cannot wield it. I‘m sorry.“

Kakashi shakes his head again. "Don’t be. This is just as important. It’s what we fight for after all.“ He gives her an eye-smile that only feels vaguely fake. "The children are the future.“

Yugao nods. "Indeed.“ She inhales, deeply. "Kurenai and I sometimes go to the playgrounds together. Aiko is a bit older, but they’ll probably go to the academy in a few years…“ She grimaces. "If there’s an academy then.“

Kakashi grunts. "I‘ll do my very best.“

Yugao blinks up to him. "You’re leading the troops?“

He nods, silently, unwilling to comment. 

Yugao frowns. "Good. Though…“ She hesitates, tilting her head. "This must be your absolute horror.“

Kakashi cackles, fidgeting under her gaze. "Ya think?“

I helped raise and train these kids, tried so hard to secure peace for them… and now I lead them into battle. 

He feels sick. 

Yugao watches him, expression kind, eyes seeing too much. "And, apart from it all, he is as much the trump up our sleeve as the target of the enemy‘s goals. There is no way to hide him, or shield him.“

Kakashi sniffs, pinching the bridge of his nose against the sudden tears, with a shrug. He is glad that his voice is almost steady. "Yeah, well, we have Sasuke at his side now, too. There is hope.“

Yugao frowns. "That why you allow it?“

Kakashi snorts and then shakes his head, looking unseeing into space. "No. I…“ …endure it… "Allow it because it is the right thing to do.“ He swallows, harshly. "He hasn’t recognized the bond, I mean, he might, even soon, but…“ He trails off. 

 

Aiko comes up, offers him a ball and Kakashi sniffs and then chuckles, throwing it to her, gently. 

She squeals, dropping it, but bending down and then offering it to him once more. With a soft babble. “Play?”

Yugao grins. “She’s very good physically, though not talking as much as I did her age… and she likes you.“

Kakashi blushes softly, trying to brace against the beautiful pain. 

Yugao tilts her head, observing Kakashi interact with Aiko once more, tone vaguely watchful. "You‘re a natural with kids. Plans for your own?“

Kakashi shivers, his throat clicking. "I don’t know. I mean…“ He breaks off, rubbing his temple for a moment, before throwing the ball again and forcing an eye-smile. "Naruto told me he wants kids. But…“ He shrugs. "We’ll see what the future brings?“

Yugao hums.

And then Aiko comes and crawls and climbs up into Kakashi’s lap, settling there, while reaching up, tugging at Kakashi’s mask, her little voice surprisingly clear.“Can see?”

Yugao’s hands fly up to her mouth. “Oh, I’m sorry, Senpai, I’ll just…”

She makes a move to get up and Kakashi just waves at her, with a little laugh, while tickling Aiko a bit, which makes her forget about his mask immediately. “No, no, no, no peeking.” He shoots Yugao a look. “All good.”

She inclines her head.

 

Kakashi clicks his tongue, grinning when Aiko squeals with giggles under his hands, but his words stay sober. “In regards to Itachi…” He can see Yugao’s eyes darken, a stubborn pout tugging at her mouth. He sighs, but with a small smirk. “I can emphasize. But death will come to us soon. Lots of death… and I am so sick of it.”

Yugao grimaces, and looks away, while Kakashi coos at Aiko, chuckling when she tries to tickle back. She shakes her head, the long, violet hair flowing. “And fate had other plans.”

Kakashi shrugs. “Apparently.” He sighs, a drawn out, long sigh. “Yugao, please be there for the others.” He shoots her a look. “Protect them.” He blinks. “And yourself.”

Yugao frowns. “You think it will impact Konoha? The fighting I mean?”

Kakashi shrugs, carefully shifting Aiko as she nestles into him. “I don’t know. But I know your skill.” Even if you don’t want to raise your sword. But to protect… I know you will.

Yugao scoffs. “As I said. I’m not Anbu anymore. And…”

Kakashi shoots her a quick grin. “I don’t think any of us will ever stop being Anbu.”

She grunts, rolling her eyes a bit, and they share a chuckle.

Aiko yawns.

 

Kakashi hesitates, and then reaches for the sword with his free hand, holding it out to her. 

He smirks, very gently. “It’s not for fighting.”

She frowns, and then reaches for it, hesitantly. There is a gasp, as the cloth falls away, her eyes riveted to the markings on the handle. “That is impossible. I buried it with him.”

Kakashi swallows, harshly. “I know.” He fidgets, and then decides to be blunt, seeing her tears fall. 

He carefully holds Aiko tighter, who is watching with huge eyes. “They used him. He made me promise to give it back to you. He…” He swallows, his voice breaking on the words. “He told me to tell you to…” He trails off, the words ‘acknowledge it’ seemingly stuck in his throat. 

Yugao gasps a laugh, speaking them for him, her words laced with pain. “Acknowledge it?”

Kakashi swallows and nods, mutely.

Yugao sniffs, eyes traveling along the blade. “Where is he now?”

Kakashi exhales, in a rush. “We released him.”

Yugao frowns, obviously hearing something in his tone. “But?”

Kakashi looks away, with a grimace. “Kabuto is still out there. He might raise him again.” He hisses, softly. “But at least you have the sword now.”

Yugao sniffs again, and then nods. Her voice sounds faraway. “There’s blood on it.”

Kakashi nods, with a loud exhale. “Mine.” He hesitates. “A promise.”

Yugao smiles, a quick, brittle, painful little smile. “Thank you.”

Kakashi nods again, while forcing himself to gently pet Aiko.

 

Yugao closes her eyes, for a long moment, and then puts the sword away, onto the ground, carefully. She blinks, staring at the wall for a long moment. “Acknowledge it… acknowledge it is broken. I remember…”

She frowns, and then sighs, softly. “I remember reading about the Sandaime’s wife, Biwako… her bond engaged the moment she turned 17.” Her eyes come up to Kakashi’s. “Think his will engage next month, too?”

Kakashi blinks, looking away for a moment, a bit taken aback by the seeming shift in subject. His voice sounds far away. “I have no idea?” He shrugs, and then bends down a bit, pushing his nose into downy toddler-hair. Aiko giggles. “So much has happened. So much is happening, still.” He hesitates, deciding to be honest, with her. “I hope for it to happen and I dread it in equal measure. I don’t think…” He trails off, unable to even think.

Yugao watches him, with a sad expression. “You don’t think the bond engaging will change much?”

Kakashi shrugs, gently, tone very tired. “I do not know.” He looks up at her. “How was it for you?”

Yugao chuckles, a laugh that is suffused with love, and pain, and longing. Her teeth glint as she smiles. “Breathtaking.” She frowns. “It… there was this moment when we both accepted it, and… it felt like home.” She shrugs, blinking. “It was a bone-deep feeling. Beyond… desire, beyond need.” She shrugs, fidgeting, looking away. Her voice is a whisper. “I feel at home with Tenzou as well, but I will never forget that moment, then, when it engaged.” Her face twists with abject pain. “That moment, when I knew.”

Kakashi nods, with a sniff. “So there is a difference between recognizing it and…”

Yugao nods, continuing. “Allowing it, yes. Acknowledging it. It was nearly simultaneous for us, but…” She looks at him, with a small, painful smile. “I know you haven’t allowed it.” She tilts her head. “You’ve allowed parts of it, but you’re fighting it, allowing that other thing to develop and… “ She shakes her head, once. “I know you haven’t allowed the bond.”

Kakashi clears his throat, nodding, once, vaguely weirded out. “Okay.”

 

Yugao stares at him, and then smiles, softly, brilliantly. Her voice is a whisper. “Trust me, Senpai, you will know then.”

Kakashi blinks, looking away. His voice is a caustic whisper. “Will I?”

And Yugao grins, nose scrunching. “Oh yes.”

 

 

 

Her smile breaks, as if in slow motion. “And I… I will need to acknowledge it’s broken.”

 

Kakashi gasps, a sudden pain lancing through his heart, at the mere thought. 

Yugao smiles, softly, in understanding.

 

He shivers, as he asks. Has to ask. “And what does that mean then?”

 

 

 

Her eyes come up to his, and then drop to Aiko and then over to where a spare head frame from Tenzou lies.

Her voice is a whisper. “It means I’m lucky.” Her eyes flicker back to his, voice almost inaudible. “Promise me…”

 

 

 

And Kakashi blinks, once.

 

Reaches over and clenches his fist around the blade, the smell of copper heavy in the air. “I promise.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi stares down at the troops, at his kids, and friends, and colleagues, all donned up in full armor and in formation, cheering at Gaara’s speech.

 

 

 

It is a good speech.

 

But it’s a battle-rallying speech. 

 

A speech that a big part of Kakashi had hoped never to hear again.

And what for, Obito, hmm? For the off chance you can really douse the world in your genjutsu, and have them dream the perfect dream… for two or three weeks? Or however long the this jutsu can keep them alive? Until they starve? Or only a week, till they die of thirst?

He frowns, grimacing when he realizes he is back at that point. 

 

That point, which really, totally, truly doesn’t make sense to him. Even if you put away the aspect of subjugating everyone else’s will… and even if you ignore the immense cost of that jutsu… what exactly will it bring YOU? The caster? 

Why have an army of white Zetsus attacking us? What did you make that army for?

Why the attack? You could have taken Naruto so often… but you didn’t. 

This whole war is just a ruse… but what do you really want? Or he?

Why… did you actually attack Konoha back then? What for?

 

 

It’s mind-boggling.

 

 

 

He inhales deeply, the wind a bit cold already, now, at the beginning of October. 

Another year gone, somehow. 

Konoha is reviving around us, and time flew by somehow.

He shares a look with Tsunade, her eyes finding his by some instinct, the expression in them impossible to decipher. 

And now… a third war, for you. 

The previous took your soul-bonded lover and your brother.

The one before took Jiraiya’s parents and yours, too, if I surmised that correctly.

 

And now…

 

He blinks, remembering their previous discussion, the discussion they’d had when he’d gone to pick up the new hitai-ate. A hitai-ate with ‘shinobi’ on it, instead of a faction.

The thought is a bit glum, drenched in dread and hope.

This may be the only good thing coming from all of this. 

 

This alliance between the factions.

 

Maybe, after, we can finally start again as friends.

 

 

Tsunade had briefed him, while the troops arrived, told him that she’d sent Iruka to the island to try to help stop Naruto from leaving too soon, since he would be able to sense the war if in sage mode. 

Had told him that the Zetsus were on the move, in various places. And that it would start, now.

Had told him that the island had been attacked, and that Tenzou was missing. 

But that Naruto was safe.

 

 

Kakashi had asked for permission to flash to Tenzou. Rescue him.

Tsunade had looked mightily old and tired denying his request. 

 

Telling him: ‘later’.

 

Because the Zetsus… are on the move. 

 

Kakashi had grown cold.

The wound in his palm had throbbed.

 

 

Her words echo in his mind now. ‘Try to make this swift, Kakashi. The shorter it is the less lives it costs.’ She had grimaced at his scoff, reaching up to rub her temple. ‘I know, I know… But I’m putting my hope on it, and hope will be a factor. We have to carry our hope, like a shield. Use Genma and Neji and transport Guy and Sakura with you to the hotspots. Make this quick.’

 

There had been a small candle on her desk, an unlit candle. 

He had taken it with him, on a whim.

 

To her quirking an eyebrow, but not saying anything.

 

 

 

It’s in one of the pockets now, in his vest.

And the pebble is in his pants pocket. 

He’s given Mr. Ukki 1 & 2 and his tanto into the shelters. 

 

Konohamaru had stared at him, and then had groaned at ‘having to water even more plants’. Had asked when Iruka would be back, because Ebisu apparently was even more boring.

Ebisu had shared a long look with Kakashi.

Kakashi had blinked, and then had reached out for the long blue scarf, and had picked up the long end always trailing on the floor and had wrapped it loosely around Konohamaru’s shoulders.

And had left, without a further word.

 

 

 

Kakashi raises his eyes to the clear sky now, the blue sky.

 

Reaches.

 

 

 

Gaara’s voice is low, his green eyes drawing Kakashi in when he lowers his. “Ready?”

 

And Kakashi smiles, brutally. Fatalistically. “Always.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

Deployment of the armies is actually swift, the strategy by Shikaku solid, the battlefields quite close, in the Land of Frost and the Land of Hot Waters, on the borders of the Land of Lightning.

 

Genma had gone around and had marked the division leaders.

 

The divisions engage the Zetsus, and reanimated foes, and Kakashi wished he could be surprised, but he only grimly sets his jaw…

So when will you send them? When will you use him? And her? I bet it will be against him, hmmm?

 

…and gets to work.

 

 

The work that he’s really good at.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Later Kakashi will try to make sense of all the things happening in that first day, and night, but while they happen, he mostly reacts, drawing on his massive experience to get him where he needs to be. 

And do what needs to be done.

 

 

There’s the report of Anko and her infiltration unit going missing, the report telling them that Kabuto is indeed involved. And raising the dead.

 

The first deaths occur, most noticeably with Aburame Muta, but Kakashi later grimly realizes they could have been much worse off, if Sasori and Shin hadn’t decided to release in peace. Still, Kakashi’s heart aches for Sai. 

But that will have to wait.

 

 

When the information comes that Kankuro’s team has engaged Zabuza… he knows he has to go.

 

 

 

He transports with Genma, Neji, Guy and Sakura - his cell - to Kankuro’s team. 

Intercepts Zabuza, just in time.

 

There is a pause, as they stare at each other.

 

There is recognition in those dark eyes, the dark eyes that look so sad. 

Kakashi blinks, while trying to stay aggressive. You know you’re being used again. And you loathe it. 

He assures Haku that he did indeed protect Zabuza back then. Did indeed not die in vain. “He died from a different cause. Plus… Zabuza never thought you were merely a tool for his destructive whims.” 

Zabuza’s voice is gruff, black eyes closed. “Kakashi… shut your mouth.”

Kakashi almost laughs, watching everyone stand and stare around them, riveted by the emotions pouring from the big Mist ninja.

And he smiles, just softly, behind his mask, telling them. “Naruto carved up the depths of Zabuza’s heart…”

 

Haku comes at him again, to shield Zabuza. Again.

Kakashi kills him with chidori, once more. 

 

Zabuza slashes through Haku, drawing a burning line of blood across Kakashi’s stomach.

 

And so the past repeats.

 

A memory rises, slow and echoing, while the blood drips down.

A memory of their trip back from the Land of Waves, so long ago.

Of Naruto babbling on, happily, while hiding the meaning in the joyful words.

‘Haku said. When people are protecting something they truly precious to them, they can truly become stronger.’ Those blue eyes had stared up at him. With a grin. ‘Especially after watching Zabuza and Haku… I think he’s right.’ The whiskers quivered. ‘What do you think?’

Kakashi had frowned, playing dumb. ‘About what?’

Naruto had rolled his eyes. ‘You see… they were the enemies. But… I kind of liked them!’ He had grinned, broadly, and then his face had crumbled, just a bit. ‘Is that weird?’

 

And Kakashi remembers now how he had smiled then, and had shaken his head, giving Naruto an eye-smile. Not realizing that Naruto must have thought about himself and his own difference from the others a lot even then, to ask again after having told Kakashi that he didn’t want to be even more weird, earlier that day, must have realized he was indeed… weird.

 

Must have realized a lot of things, and told of only a few. 

 

Always knowing that things were kept from him. Always aware of that. And willfully, desperately ignoring it to keep that small flame of innocence, of light, of soul burning. Fanning it, deliberately, despite all the shit thrown at you. 

 

Oh god, Naruto. I hope you are able to fan that flame in you now, too.

 

He blinks, very slowly, and then exhales, deliberately, ordering Maki to get the sealing jutsu ready, before returning his attention to the big Mist ninja, whose eyes have lost their expression sometime during their fight.

Whose eyes are dead now, staring unseeing.

Kakashi keeps his voice kind, while his heart aches for him.. “Zabuza. You hesitated to slice through Haku that day. You couldn’t hide the unrest in your heart over Haku’s death. But things are different today. You’re just an emotionless tool of evil.”

 

That’s all that Kabuto is letting you be.

 

Chidori flares up, ghostly shadows playing on the mist. 

His words are firm, but there is kindness in there, too. “So, let’s just get this senseless fight over with!”

 

And he smiles, punching his chidori through Zabuza’s dead chest.

Directing his thoughts to Naruto, to the boy in his memories, and the young man trying to find a way to control their most powerful weapon right now. Nah. I feel the same. 

And I will fight, till my last breath, for those I love.

 

His and Zabuza’s eyes catch, and he watches as Zabuza’s gaze flickers over to Haku, soften. Sense returns to them, somehow.

Kakashi blinks, voice low. “As a shinobi, I’ve got plenty to protect, too.” He hesitates, and then adds, words not directed at Zabuza anymore, whose eyes are still riveted to Haku. “I need to protect the manner of death for both of you. Especially since I was… and am again your final enemy.” He smirks softly, watching a tear drop from Zabuza’s eye. 

His voice drops to a whisper, asking across time and distance. “What do you think, Naruto?”

For a moment, he can see Naruto grin. 

 

Zabuza very slowly opens his hand, and Kubikiribōchō drops to the ground.

His eyes flicker back, to Kakashi, for just a moment.

Kakashi nods.

 

And then he tilts back his head, calling back to the others. “Do it, Maki.”

 

Zabuza closes his eyes, in gratitude, when the wraps close around him. And Haku. Sealing them away, once more at peace. Hopefully.

Kakashi’s finger close around the handle of Kubikiribōchō.

Well then. Lets see what those hours practicing with longswords back then with Sora have brought me, stamina-wise. 

He grins, grimly, watching the Mist lift. 

 

And then he calls to Sai, reassures him that he can, indeed, use his own sealing jutsu, as well. “Danzo valued you highly. You don’t need to suppress your emotions anymore.” You can do it.

You can trap them. 

 

 

 

Kubikiribōchō is heavy in his hand.

 

 

But it also feels surprisingly good.

 

And it hits, real nicely.

 

 

 

 

Guy drops to the ground to him, at some point, voice breathless. “Only three of them left.”

Kakashi nods, while shooting a look at the panting Sai, whose knuckles clenching the big scroll containing four of the sword men already are white. “Are you alright, Sai?”

Sai nods, and then smirks, a fleeting smile around his mouth. “Yes I can… keep going.”

Kakashi grins grimly, about to open his mouth. 

 

 

And then hundreds and hundreds of white Zetsus start pouring out of the woods, coming at them.

Guy’s voice carries something that could be gallows humor. “Things are about to get wild, Kakashi.”

Kakashi grunts, shifting his stance… and then his gut flutters, and he blinks, reality slowing to a crawl, as something blindingly bright, and flaming, and beautiful drops to a crouch in front of him.

 

Putting itself between the Zetsus and the alliance.

 

 

Protecting, shielding. 

 

 

 

And he wants to scream.

 

 

 

There is a literal pause, as the Zetsus, and the alliance, and the world seem to hold their breath.

 

 

The chakra cloak is light yellow, with flickers of orange, looking like flames, licking at and covering all of Naruto. The color is that of Naruto’s hair, a golden, full-body halo with black markings that resemble sage-markings.

The urge to step forward and touch is almost irresistible, the tips of Kakashi’s fingers itching to run over the chakra-covered skin. There is a whisper, passing through their ranks.

So this is what you look like when you’ve mastered the cloak. When the rage of it is gone. 

 

 

When you’re more beautiful than the sun.

 

 

He swallows, compulsively. Oh Naruto, I am so proud of you. So very, very proud. He closes his eyes, for a split second, wondering where Sasuke is. 

Trying to master the flaring love in his heart.

 

He clicks his tongue, reaching for equilibrium with an effort, watching Naruto more or less ignore him, keep his eyes on the Zetsus. The words taste sweet in his mouth. “Our reinforcements have arrived… or should I say, reinforcement… Singular.”

Lee pipes ub, a bit bewildered. “But Naruto can perform multiple kage bunshin?”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. And that is an understatement.

Naruto inclines his head, just a bit, his tone calm. “No, not right now I can’t.” There is a tangible sensation of chakra being pulled together, as Naruto lowers his stance. “This time, I’m quality, instead of quantity.”

 

Kakashi frowns. And a bunshin? But… He tightens his grip on the sword‘s handle, searching his senses. Evaluating the fluttering in his gut. The shivers on his skin. But if you only are a bunshin, you put enough of your essence into it to connect to me. He frowns deeper, watching himself swing the sword, slicing through white, artificial flesh. Which means… what? Another heartbeat, another Zetsu gone. If you are only a bunshin, and yet I can feel you… 

Naruto inclines his head, shooting him a look from the corner of his eyes, rasen shuriken in each of his hands, but his gaze is simply riveted to Kakashi’s, for a moment, as if sensing his thoughts. 

 

Kakashi smiles, wobbly, beatifically, helplessly, behind his mask, while swinging Kubikiribōchō out. While he blinks to keep his vision clear. Understanding, suddenly.

 

It’s almost here, isn’t it?

He shivers, knowing Naruto feels him through the bunshin, too. 

Through the tether to his original. 

 

 

It’s almost time for the bond to engage. 

 

 

Something in him unclenches, despite everything. 

Despite knowing what their situation is.

And who Naruto is with, right now. 

 

 

But…

 

 

 

It’s time. 

Soon. Very soon.

 

 

 

 

Whatever that will mean, now, for us.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He leaves Kubikiribōchō there, at the spot they fought, when they are done. 

At the spot where Zabuza and Haku are laid to rest, again.

 

When the swordsmen of the Mist have been sealed away, when a golden flashing Naruto had torn with him and Guy and the others through the white Zetsus as if they were butter.

When Kakashi had lost count of the rasen shuriken Naruto had used. 

 

 

When night had come and gone, with the reports of doppelgängers and imposters, and vicious attacks.

 

When the report had come, that Asuma had been sealed away by his own team.

Kakashi had inhaled deeply, the phantom smell and taste of tobacco in his nose, and on his tongue. And sorrow tinged love in his heart.

 

When Dan has been captured as well.

 

When the report had come that Obito had gone in and retrieved some ninja tools containing bijou essence from revived Kinkaku and Ginkaku with a… statue.

 

Then… 

 

Kakashi frowns.

Realizing the same thing, that, unbeknownst to him, Kabuto is thinking too. 

He’s going in with only remnants of the fox’s chakra, and a tail’s worth of the octopus’. He must be getting impatient.

 

And Kakashi blinks.

 

Why is he getting impatient now ?

 

 

 

When the report comes that the five kage have engaged… Madara, he knows that they’re entering the final phase.

 

Already. It’s been not even a day.

 

So, Obito. The deal is up. 

 

The dice are rolling.

 

 

 

 

 

 

When Naruto’s clone dispels with a gasp Kakashi sets his teeth. 

 

 

 

 

Pulls out some of Sakura’s food pills, not even noticing the taste.

 

Grabs onto Guy and reaches.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

They crash into Genma and Neji, and Raido.

 

And Sasuke.

 

 

Naruto is moving away from them, a ways off already while Kakashi tries to catch his balance, glowering at the subjugated bijous - and Tobi, standing amongst them.

 

There is a huge octopus-like bijou seemingly taking up the whole horizon and sky behind them.

 

Kakashi slowly releases his clenched knuckles from Guy’s vest, seeing that Guy’s skin color is once more resembling the suit he wears, obviously not having had a good trip through… whatever.

Kakashi lightly pats his back, while turning towards Obito, with his sharingan open.

 

He sees Naruto skid to a halt… incline his head. Glower.

 

He blinks, knowing Naruto is alright for now.

His eyes wander over to the lone figure, wearing a mask with two eye-holes.

 

 

And so we’re here, now, on the battlefield, Obito. 

Fighting for your dream.

 

On different sides.

 

 

Because the new dream is a different one now, for you.

 

 

But Naruto is now fighting for your old dream… and I‘ll make sure he reaches it. 

 

 

Kakashi blinks, and then smiles, a gentle, kind smile.

A wolfish smile.

 

Full of determination.

 

Genma comes up, with a whisper, expression grim. “Iruka has called me via Shikaku to transport Sasuke here. He said it wouldn’t help if Naruto’s attention was divided.” He shares a look with Kakashi, who grimaces. Genma’s voice drops even more. “I wasn’t too happy, neither was Gaara. But he’s probably right. He usually is.” Kakashi grimaces again, but nods, conceding the point. Genma shifts the toothpick to the other corner of his mouth. “And Sasuke is indeed an asset, Kakashi.”

Kakashi grimaces again, and then nods, curtly, while Genma steps back. “I know that.” He shoots a quick look at the raven-haired shinobi standing off to the side, seemingly relaxed, hand on his sword. They gave you a sword, even? He clicks his tongue, eyes returning to Genma. “You’ll leave?”

Genma nods, signaling Neji and Raido. “Yes. We’ll be back. The kages are still busy with Madara, but we have been tasked to transport the jonin-level ninja here, while the remaining army is to follow as soon as they can.”

Kakashi frowns, watching the standoff that is happening in front of them. 

The pause there is in the proceedings. “Here? Why?”

 

Genma shrugs, but Sasuke speaks up, tone cold. “This is the interjection of all the trajectories.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, looking at Sasuke with a frown. “And you know, how…?”

Sasuke tilts his head, the black hair shifting. “Itachi told me that Tobi used to be obsessing over maps, especially over maps detailing this piece of land.”

Kakashi stares at him for a moment, and then turns to Genma, while Naruto is being captured by tailed-beast tails. He shivers, but something in him knows Naruto is alright nonetheless, just gathering strength. Evaluating. “Does Shikaku know?”

Genma shrugs, but Sasuke interjects, tone complacent. “Yes.”

Kakashi blinks. And still they come here? He clicks his tongue. “Can you connect me?”

Genma shakes his head, with a sidelong gaze at Neji, who had been watching silently, byakugan trained on their enemy. “No. But I can bring you someone who can.”

Kakashi nods. “Do that please. Before you transport the others.”

 

He turns to Sasuke. Tilts his head, with an eye smile, while Genma, Raido and Neji take up position. He exhales. “So. Ready to put your skill to good use?”

Sasuke smiles, sharply, a smile that is there and gone again, eyes sparkling. “Try to keep up, old man.” He draws his sword, slowly.

Kakashi grunts, turning away. 

Sees Guy pull himself up again, with slightly more healthy pallor.

 

Raises his eyes to Naruto, who is being spit out by the huge, ape-like bijou right at this moment. 

 

Sasuke grunts, tone as dry as the desert. “Oh great, he’ll stink when this is all over.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he snorts, tilting his head towards Sasuke. Deciding to use this opportunity to… mend their relationship further. A bit. Though the words take an effort. “There’s a waterfall close to Konoha that’s really nice for bathing.”

Sasuke cackles, once, and then twists his hand, lets the sword swing. “What should I concentrate on?”

Kakashi blinks, and then exhales, in a rush. “Fight at Naruto’s side. Obito is my responsibility.”

There is a pause, as both Sasuke and Guy stare at him. 

Kakashi rewinds his words, and then grimaces. Right. They didn’t know it’s him yet. “Long story. Still, I’ll take care of him.”

He draws a kunai out and then hesitates, with a sidelong glance at them. “He cannot seem to use Pain’s powers while controlling all those bijous. Still… This won’t be all he can do.”

Sasuke quirks an eyebrow, lowering his stance for a sprint. “It would have been too easy, too.”

Guy looks away for a moment, and then flashes him a grin, with a thumbs-up. “I would loathe to pass up an opportunity to open the Gates of Joy!”

 

Kakashi reaches up for a moment, squeezes his shoulder. “Well. Then lets do it.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

The bijous are coming at them, and they fight them off one by one, but it is a losing battle. 

Kakashi grunts, tearing through the oncoming barrage with a lightning wire held up by his bunshin. And these are ‘only’ the weaker bijous… what kind of power do you and that Killer-B wield now?

 

Another roar, another tail, and Kakashi hastily jumps out of the way, only to be surrounded by more.

 

 

 

And then… the situation shifts.

 

 

 

 

 

For a moment, he thinks it is Minato. 

 

A long coat, and gold, and speed.

 

 

Sensei…?

 

 

No. I mean… it cannot be?

 

 

 

Sasuke is off to the side, doing god-knows-what, and Kakashi shields his eyes, pain in his heart.

Longing for Minato, terribly, for just a moment.

 

 

Light fades, as vision returns, followed by an absence of sound.

 

 

 

And shadows around a kage bunshin’s eyes a few feet away, light orange in the glow of the surrounding chakra.

 

The pain turns beautiful, pure, when Kakashi realizes where they are. 

We’re safe for now, inside the chakra manifestation of the nine-tails.

He raises his eyes to the young man commanding the attack on the other bijous - freeing them from Pain’s rods - easily upholding a power that bites.

 

Easily upholding a sage-mode-combined-bijou mode, too, if the markings and appearance are any indication.

 

Kakashi swallows, harshly.

So you really did defeat the pain within you. And within the fox, too. You managed not only to tap into its power… but make it a part of you. Your friend. 

 

Oh Naruto.

 

Love that is so pure it burns, deep, deep down in his gut.

 

He lowers his gaze, watches as a purple Susanoo holds off the bijous till Naruto can reach for the rods with his chakra hands. 

Watches as the purple and the gold chakra forms high-five each other, when they’re all out.

 

For a moment, Naruto’s eyes are vacant. 

And then he starts laughing, exclaiming loudly about ‘hard names to learn’.

 

Kakashi looks over at Obito.

Who stares.

 

Just… stares at Naruto. Stares at the bijous now hovering around them.

 

Kakashi feels the tiniest bit gleeful. And mean.

Ha, you feel it now, too, don’t you. 

 

The sheer power he commands. 

 

So different from yours… or mine. 

 

 

 

 

And you underestimated him. Badly.

 

 

 

For a long moment nothing happens. 

And then Kakashi sees Obito form a simple concentration seal, as if in slow-motion. 

 

The earth shakes and groans, and the Gedo statue rises from the ground, shattering the surface. 

Kakashi stares at the grizzly visage with it’s 10 eyes, 8 of them already open, the yawning mouth. His ears are ringing from the sound.

And there is a sensation of power, as the statue is fed something by Obito. 

 

Kakashi grimaces, guessing correctly what exactly Obito gave it. 

 

Slowly, very slowly, the last eyes open, and the statue - the creature - roars.

 

 

Next to him, Guy gasps. 

 

Kakashi blinks. And now, Obito. Why exactly did you set the stage like this?

You obviously were able to finish it all without further fighting… but you wanted to. 

 

 

You wanted all the resurrections, all the death, all the fights. 

 

 

You wanted all that. 

 

 

 

And you wanted it close to… here. 

 

 

 

Here. Where Sasuke said all roads cross in this war.

 

 

 

It is a bit of an easy… and yet petrifying realization. 

 

 

You wanted us here.

 

You moved us here.

 

Like pieces on a board.

 

 

He exhales, in a rush.

The kage bunshin next to him collecting sen energy turns his head.

 

The thought is almost… sweet. A relief.

Because it makes sense.

 

 

It’s a trap.

 

We’re exactly where you wanted us to be.

 

 

 

 

Obito reaches up, hesitates, and then takes off his mask, revealing his face with an obvious sigh, eyes raised to the sky for a moment. 

White skin, and unruly, messy hair, framing a face that rivets with the sight of mismatched eyes, one red, one purple.

Still handsome, echoing the boy he knew back then.

 

Kakashi blinks, gaze traveling the face revealed, over the scars that come into view, the white scars, the twisted visage.

The purple eye in the socket that used to contain the eye he wears now. 

The eye that was taken from Nagato.

The eye that is proof of Konan’s death.

 

His heart hurts.

 

Kakashi stares at Obito, at the mask in his hand. The symbolism of it. 

Like the goggles back then… You don’t need their protection anymore. You don’t need to hide anymore. His eyes rise to Obito’s, lock their gaze. Echoing. You don’t need to hide anymore.

 

 

I bet you have longed for this moment, for so long.

 

How freeing it must be.

 

 

 

He frowns, watching something in Obito’s face shift, from relaxed glee to mild annoyance, before that expression is carefully schooled away.

Obito’s attention shifts, to a point off to the side.

 

Kakashi frowns, shifting his own attention, too.

 

 

 

The sensation of power, coming at them.

 

 

 

Naruto’s head whips round, his reddish yellow eyes tracking it.

Kakashi frowns, opening his mouth to warn but it passes them, manifesting next to Obito on the battlefield. 

 

 

A lone figure, clad in red.

 

Long, wild black hair, and black eyes, in a face that everybody knows, from tale and stone. 

Armor of times long gone, donned on an imposing body.

Empty hands, and a stance that does not need weapons.

 

The voice is gentle but scolding, carrying a vague mocking undertone as well as a depth that is almost hypnotic. “You launched our plan half-baked, before you even took eight- and nine-tails in?”

 

Shivers, running down Kakashi’s spine. So this is who sent you.

Damn, I was right.

 

Fucking shit.

 

 

Something tickles the back of Kakashi’s mind, scratching along his consciousness. 

 

But… he… Kakashi frowns, trying to pin the thought. The emotion. HE doesn’t want control this world via a genjutsu. Does he.

 

That would be… out of character. 

HE wants this world, for his own. 

Have his cake and eat it, too. 

 

So. But… What does HE want with this setup?

 

 

 

What exactly do YOU want, Uchiha Madara. 

 

 

 

Over on the side, Sasuke‘s hand clenches on the sword‘s handle. 

Steps forward, to stand next to Naruto. 

 

Kakashi stares at the two pairs staring at each other, something clicking into place.

 

Inverted mirror images. 

The same desires, to change and save our world… but with a chasm of belief between you. 

 

The same dreams, just inverted.

 

He blinks, as Naruto loudly demands to know what happened to the kages.

He shivers again, when Madara just disdainfully tells him they’re defeated. With a little, contemptuous sigh.

 

The thought is glum.

He defeated them? The five kages? 

And he did so alone? In his resurrected form?

He watches, as if in trance, as Obito gives the Gunbai back to Madara, who uses it to repel Naruto’s first attack, easily. Kakashi blinks, watching Obito’s body language, while Sasuke intercepts Madara’s retaliation strike.

So. You’re deferring to him. You… owe him?

It must have been him who saved you back then.

 

 

But he was supposed to be dead. Then.

 

 

 

Guy exclaims loudly next to him, finger coming up in the glow.

Kakashi blinks, raising his eyes to Obito, who is charging at him. The thought is almost good.

Ah. You know it, too, don’t you. That I must be the one to stop you.

 

Kakashi lowers his stance, preparing to jump out of the chakra cloak.

 

 

There is a shudder of force, as Naruto head-butts Obito out of Kakashi’s way.

 

 

Kakashi blinks, momentarily stunned, a state that seems to be shared by Obito, who is holding his forehead, while staring at Naruto. 

 

Kakashi can see the bruise forming, immediately. And then vanish again, immediately, too.

 

Guy exhales next to him. “So it seems your young soul-mate wishes to protect you.”

Kakashi hums, while swallowing compulsively, feeling congested with love. Watching the golden sage form burn with rage while hovering in front of Obito. Ignoring Guy’s comment. 

He raises his eyes to Madara, who is watching, with a vaguely amused expression. While easily repelling Sasuke’s Susanoo.

He grimaces. If I remember correctly… “Guy. You might be the only one who can defeat him.” He shares a look with his old friend, who is staring at their opponent, expression stern, none of the usual exuberance in it.

Guy nods, once.

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “I will defeat Obito.” Somehow. He exhales, sharing a look with Sasuke. Who nods. Kakashi smiles, gently. “Sasuke will protect Naruto.”

The golden form tilts its head, Naruto’s voice vaguely annoyed. “I don’t need protection.”

Kakashi grunts, jumping out of the chakra fox cloak. “Humor me.” He quirks an eyebrow. “When will the others arrive?”

Naruto’s eyes are vacant for a split second. “Soon.”

Kakashi nods, seeing a pinched and yet excited expression enter Obito’s features.

He clicks his tongue. “Very well. Lets end this.”

 

Obito’s eyes flicker to him, and then back to Naruto.

He also clicks his tongue. “Very well.”

 

The wheels in his eye turn, and Kakashi starts, wanting to scream, wanting to warn, but he knows he’d be too late to stop whatever jutsu Obito conjures with his Mangekyo now, I’ll be too late, dammit, and then there’s a screech of a crow, and silence, suddenly. 

For an instant.

 

And then Obito curses, viciously, holding his eye, while Naruto laughs, delightedly.

 

Kakashi tries to understand. A crow? A crow that…. Oh. He grins suddenly, just a bit gleefully mean. Looks like Itachi’s counter jutsu worked. 

 

Obito snarls, a bitter note to his tone. “Why could you use Kotoamatsukami?”

Naruto giggles. “It was a gift.”

Sasuke jumps over to land next to Naruto, while Guy hops out of the chakra cloak to stand silently across from Madara.

Sasuke turns his head for a moment to look at Guy, and then back at Obito, with a little biting smirk. “Thank you by the way for keeping Itachi alive.”

Obito snorts, disdainfully. His tone is acerbic. “I must admit, he played a masterful game, deceiving and sabotaging me.” 

Sasuke’s eyes sparkle. “Still sabotaging.”

Obito glowers.

 

Kakashi clears his throat. Dammit, Sasuke, don’t annoy him further. He sighs, and then steps up and around Naruto, who shoots him a look. 

Kakashi’s voice is quiet. “This is  my fight.”

Obito hisses, still holding his eye. “Oh, I’m so done with you all.”

His hand twists, and chains erupt from the statues mouth, latching onto the bijous hovering round, pulling them in. 

Madara chuckles.

 

Naruto yells, loudly, wanting to charge, but both Sasuke’s and Kakashi’s hands come up, holding onto his heaving shoulders, holding Naruto back. 

Kakashi and Sasuke share a quick glance.

 

Kakashi swallows. “Don’t. If we divide our attention now, against him, we’re dust.”

Madara quirks an eyebrow, with a salacious twist on his lips.

Naruto is shaking under their hands, with rage. “I thought you said Guy would defeat him.”

Kakashi nods, ignoring the way Obito’s mouth twists in a vicious little smile. Ignoring Madara’s little scoff. “And I think he can. Still.” He leans in a bit, tone imploring. “Naruto, Madara defeated the five kages. Alone.”

Something stubborn and yet proud enters Naruto’s features. “They’re not dead.”

Obito’s exclamation matches Kakashi’s. “What?” They share a somewhat amused look. 

Madara’s expression grows vaguely pinched.

Naruto shrugs, with a pout. “They’re not dead. I sensed them earlier. He defeated them alright, but he decided to leave instead of delivering the final blow.” His expression grows a bit darker. “I should have left a bunshin there, as I wanted.”

Kakashi blinks, feeling how taut Naruto’s shoulders are. The muscles under the cloth and skin. “You had a bunshin there?” You knew?

Naruto shrugs, while still glowering at Obito. “Baa-chan told me to get lost.”

Obito snorts, in a way that clearly portrays his astonishment.

Madara sighs, deliberately.

Kakashi shakes his head once. “I see.”

 

In the background, the statue finishes pulling the bijous in and Kakashi grimaces, feeling Naruto shake under his hand. 

He tilts his head, in silent inquiry.

Naruto’s voice is pressed. “They’re suffering.”

Kakashi squeezes his shoulder, silently, in sympathy. 

 

Obito blinks, tilting his head. “Now. Now the field is… cleared.”

Kakashi snorts, tone acerbic. “You mean set.” Over on the other side, Madara is leaning on his Gunbai with his arms crossed, a vaguely amused expression on his face. Kakashi looks back at Obito. “All the pieces are here.”

A dark light enters Obito’s features, his voice a whisper. “Almost, yes.”

Kakashi shakes his head, once. “What are we waiting for?” Or… who?

Sasuke turns to look at him, frowning, but it is Madara who answers, calling over. 

His tone is almost kind. Explaining, as if to a wayward child. “That… massive genjutsu requires time to summon the moon.” He shifts, with a little sigh, straightening up again. “You and your… pets would only interfere.”

Kakashi grimaces, shooting a look at Sasuke. “Sasuke, I trust in you.” Protect him. He knows Sasuke hears the unspoken request. His gaze turns to Naruto. “And I believe in you.” 

Naruto’s golden eyes blink at him, and then Naruto smirks, with a grin that scrunches his nose. “I’ll free the bijous.” 

Obito snorts. Disdainfully.

The statue roars, the ground shaking. It begins to change, the limbs bulging. Grows, slowly.

Guy shifts his stance.

Madara sighs, picking up his Gunbai. His voice carries boredom. “Are you done?”

 

Kakashi steps around Naruto, draws a kunai.

Obito’s eyes narrow. 

 

And then Kakashi springs forward, while Naruto rushes past him and at the statue, and Guy charges at Madara, while Sasuke whirls his sword to separate Obito and Naruto.

 

 

 

Time slows, trickles.

 

 

 

Obito blinks, giant shuriken manifesting in his hand.

Kakashi opts to receive a part of the blow, in order to get close. 

 

Heat, crossing in searing lines over his heart. 

 

Cross my heart and hope to die.

 

Something flickers across Obito’s face, there and gone again. Something vulnerable.

Kakashi pushes his kunai into the white flesh. 

 

Blood drips from the tips of the shuriken.

The white flesh closes the wound, immediately. Around the tip of the kunai still embedded in it.

Obito smiles. 

 

Triumphantly. 

Gleefully. 

Desperately. 

Painfully.

 

Behind them, in the distance, orange yellow and purple chakra make the ground shake. 

Kakashi shoots a look over at Guy. Noting he and Madara are still at the… preliminaries.

Still testing. I still have time to save you when you open the gates.

His gaze returns to Obito.

 

He whispers, there between them. “Did the Sandaime flush you out back then?”

Obito blinks, obviously taken aback, the shuriken lowering a bit. “What?”

Kakashi tilts his head. “Back then. He said he wanted to prepare a jutsu to flush the attacker out. Itachi said it was only for outsiders. But I wonder…” 

Obito snorts, and then looks away, for just a second. “He did.”

“Ah.” Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, and then works his jaw, tone hard. “But he let you continue?”

Obito smiles, sharply. “He didn’t have a choice.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a moment. “Sonofabitch.” 

Obito shivers, not answering.

 

There’s a big clang, as Guy’s fist hits the Gunbai.

And the creature roars.

 

 

Obito sighs, and then clicks his tongue. “Lets go somewhere more private, hmm?”

Kakashi’s eyes snap to his, but it is too late, the world swirling already, pulling.

 

Naruto’s yell follows him into nothing.

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi falls to his knees with a gasp, on rough slabs of stone, caught in a weird, diffuse light. 

The air is stale somehow, unmoving, but obviously breathable, and there are little bits of debris laying around, and bits and pieces of rock.

Kakashi picks a pebble up, looks at it, while trying to get his bearings. “So this is where it all went.”

Obito hums. “I was very lucky that I wasn’t in here when you transferred Deidara’s explosion.”

Kakashi pushes up and looks around, carefully and purposefully turning his back, before facing Obito again. “Were you here often?”

Obito shrugs, with a small sigh. “This was the only place left that was mine.”

Kakashi nods, and then nods at a box, a ways off. “Using it as storage?”

Obito shrugs again, looking at the box for a long moment. “As I said.” 

Kakashi frowns. Things that belong to you that you don’t want Madara to have… what could that possibly be?

Obito chuckles, obviously reading him well. “Well, you’ll have to defeat me to look into it.”

Kakashi sighs, shooting him a look. “What if I don’t want to.”

Obito snorts. “Don’t be ridiculous.”

Kakashi tilts his head, tone imploring, but hard. “I’m serious. We don’t have to do this. Abandon this stupid plan and help us stop Madara.”

Obito snarls at him. “It is my dream.”

It is Kakashi’s turn to snarl. “Oh please, Obito. As if Madara would be satisfied to rule a dream world.”

Obito jerks as if slapped, looking away with a sniff. His voice is small. “It is my dream.”

Kakashi blinks, trying to understand. “You… didn’t think he’d show up.”

Obito snorts, and then grimaces, pushing the tip of his tongue to his front teeth.

Kakashi blinks, the action so terribly familiar, overlaid now by all the complicated feelings he has for Naruto it throws him for a loop. 

And so the wheels turn. Little things I had forgotten get repeated, and the longing is so terrible I can hardly breathe. 

Obito’s voice is a whisper, and Kakashi banishes his own thoughts, refocusing with an effort. “I didn’t think he’d show up like this.” He snorts again, bitterly. “But I might have known that Kabuto would do what he wanted… He thinks he’s stronger than me.”

Kakashi tilts his head, clearing his throat. “Is he?”

Obito blinks up to him, in a decidedly tired way. “He has some trump cards to play, yet.”

A shiver runs down Kakashi’s spine. 

Yes. He has yet to revive Kushina, Minato and the kages. 

 

Naruto has met his parents in his chakra memories already… having to fight them would hurt him so badly.

 

He whispers. “I have to get back, Obito. I need to go and help him against… them.”

Obito sighs, while his fingers tighten on the shuriken. “You won’t leave this dimension.”

Kakashi gnashes his teeth, glowering at him. “Fucking stop this, Obito.”

Obito blinks, and then throws the shuriken, almost lazily, deliberately missing.

Kakashi charges at him, chidori aimed.

 

And halts, inches in front of Obito’s face. 

 

The lightning throws shadows over the wrinkled face, twists it frighteningly.

Obito blinks, staring at the lightning shrouded fist in front of his face. 

 

His voice sounds faraway. “You could have killed me so often… why didn’t you?” There’s a shadow passing over his face that has nothing to do with the light from the lightning. “There is still doubt in your heart.”

Kakashi frowns, staring at him. So it is true. “You want me to kill you.”

Obito smiles, almost beatifically. “Then that dream will be truly eternal.”

He moves forward and up, pushes his body into Kakashi’s chidori. 

 

The flesh is cold around Kakashi’s wrist. 

Kakashi cannot think. 

Cannot breathe.

 

Obito draws back, slowly, hands pointing at the hole in his chest.

His voice is a whisper. “See? There’s nothing in my heart. Although you only hit part of it.” He chuckles. “You almost managed to burn out Minato’s seal, too.” He hums. “Oh well, too bad.” The mismatched eyes blink up to Kakashi. “You can try again?”

 

Kakashi blinks, his tongue too big for his mouth. “Minato’s seal?”

Obito rolls his eyes. “Bakakashi.” He snorts, and then looks away, with a grimace. “He marked me to flash to me, back then. It’s invisible, and it doesn’t do anything, but I…”

Kakashi blinks, staring at him. His voice is a whisper. “But you feel it, always.”

Obito pulls a face, swallowing. His voice is a whisper. “The touch of his hand on my lower back burns, in memory and present.”

 

Kakashi exhales, staring at his old… friend. “That hole in your heart can never be filled if you don’t fill it with love.” He inhales, shakingly. “Obito, things don’t always go as we want them to.”

Obito scoffs. “Yeah. Just as I couldn’t get there, in time.”

Kakashi frowns, staring at him. You knew, beforehand? How could you have known? Except… He blinks, another piece slotting into place. Of course. It was a trap. It was meant to separate you from us. 

Sever the ties.

 

Oh Obito.

 

Obito snarls at him, obviously guessing his thoughts. “I will not make the same mistake again.”

Kakashi blinks, raising his hand for the sign of battle. “I see.” He closes his eyes, for a moment. “Obito… all I can give you right now… is death.”

The death to separate you from him.

Obito stares at him, and then the expression tightens, his eyes darkening. “Very well. Then I shall do the same.”

Kakashi lowers his hand, lets chidori flare back up. We’ll see. 

 

This is all I can do right now.

 

There is an iron rod growing from the gloved white hand. 

Kakashi watches it being aimed, as if in slow motion, while his hand comes down and round.

 

He knows it will hit.

He knows it will hurt.

 

He also knows it won’t kill him.

 

Kakashi blinks, hearing Tenzou’s words, while lightning and iron pierce flesh.

‘It’s the angle, you know?’

 

 

We’re like them, aren’t we. Like Yin and Yang.

Two sets of mismatched eyes.

 

And our pain and sharingan connect us.

 

 

Obito shivers, around his arm.

Kakashi raises his eyes to his, watches as blood drops from Obito’s mouth.

His words are a whisper, carried on pain. “This time, I hit your heart.”

Obito cackles a laugh, a tear dropping from his sharingan.

Kakashi lets the chidori flare out, tries to breathe the pain spreading from his middle away. He exhales and then pushes his head close, pushes the side of his face against Obito’s scarred one. He mumbles the words, breathes them, just loud enough for Obito to hear. “It’s gone, isn’t it? The seal that prevented you from feeling all that you feel for us? The seal that sealed away the longing?”

Obito sobs, once.

 

And then steps back, ripping his body from around Kakashi’s wrist. 

 

 

Another tear drops, from the sharingan.

 

Maybe it was from the one Kakashi has. 

Maybe not. 

 

 

And Kakashi knows, suddenly.

 

 

He smiles, gently, serenely, dropping to his knees. 

Looks up at Obito, while dropping his kunai. “Take it back.”

You have to take it back.

 

His own thought echoes through his brain. 

Sacrifice that which you value most. Accept the darkness. 

 

Obito jolts, and then drops to his knees in from of him, too, shivering like a leaf. “What?”

Kakashi’s smile is brittle, but kind. He knows Obito can see it, despite the mask. “Take it back. Heal the rift between us. This mark of our separation.”

There is a sound that leaves Obito’s throat, a sound that is only vaguely human.

 

Kakashi whispers, letting all his feelings bleed through, all his longing. “It’s yours.” He chuckles, drily, pressing his hand to the rod in his side. “Sora will probably yell at me, but I’ve always known it was yours. Mine only to use. Mine to see the world through your eyes.” He shakes his head, with a chuckle. “I felt your pain through it, too, and the longing was always there, hidden, and pure.” He exhales, in a rush. Offers. “Take it back.”

Obito sniffs, and then looks away, with a snort. “He’ll be so pissed when I come back without the rinnegan?”

Kakashi snorts too, and then gasps, holding his side against the pain. 

 

There is a pause as Obito just stares into space. 

At the box. 

 

And then… something stubborn enters Obito’s features. 

His tone is hard. “Fine.”

 

He pushes up, hesitating, before moving towards Kakashi.

His hand is shivering.

 

Kakashi blinks, watches him come closer, tries not to flinch, to no avail.

Tries not to dwell on the fact that this won’t be surgical. 

 

 

His scream echoes through the non-space. 

 

 

Obito’s hands are shaking, but he is silent when he rips his left eye out, too, matter of factly.

 

Kakashi watches him, trembling, his world two-dimensional and hurting.

Knowing they both are, right now. 

 

His voice is raspy. “You have done that before.”

Obito shrugs, sniffing, while putting the rinnegan eye into the box, carefully. He is silent, while he inserts the sharingan back into his left eye-socket.

Gasps, when it obviously reconnects. 

 

Swallows, before looking back at Kakashi, both red eyes full of tears.

His voice shivers. “I had to, a few times.”

 

Kakashi nods, watching the taut posture. Knows his own is equally locked, equally braced. “I’m sorry.”

Obito cackles, before turning to him. “What the hell are you sorry for.”

Kakashi exhales, glad to feel some of the pain ebb away. “For having to stop you.”

Obito frowns, and then looks at the box at his feet, before picking it up. “You won’t, so don’t apologize.”

Kakashi sniffs, trying. “Obito…” Come on.

Obito inclines his head. “Good bye, Kakashi.” He smiles, a brittle, wistful little smile. “You will be the only one not dreaming.”

 

The air in front of him swirls, and then Obito is gone and Kakashi… stares. 

Peeved, annoyed, dumbfounded, aggravated, hurt, pissed, sad, and determined.

 

And, for some reason, vaguely amused.

 

 

 

And then rips the iron rod out, with a grimace. And a curse.

Fine.

 

He reaches into his vest with shaking fingers, sews the wounds in his gut and back as good as possible. 

And then munches on one of Sakura’s food pills, exhaling when the rush of energy hits.

 

 

Smiles, grimly. 

 

 

 

 

 

Fine.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

He crashes into Obito, through nothing and the cold of space, and with the force of a sledgehammer. 

 

And the expression of a vengeful angel.

 

 

 

Obito gasps and stumbles, falling to the ground in the process, clutching the little box.

The box containing the enemy’s weapon.

 

He scuttles away and twists around, red eyes stunned and huge, and on Kakashi.

 

Kakashi hisses. “Don’t bother sending me away again. I’ll just crash into you again.”

Obito blinks. “How…”

Kakashi snorts, the sound devoid of any humor. “You and he are marked. By him.” He heavily emphasizes the word, trying to ignore the lancing pain that the impact had shocked through his body. He feels something warm trickle down his left cheek, and his lower body, surmising it must be blood. 

He clicks his tongue, his voice a hiss again. “He marked you and him for me…” He chuckles. “The past and the future, the negative of the other’s dream, both for me to reach if only I wanted to.” I wonder if he did it on purpose.

He grimaces, pushing himself up. 

Feeling the gazes of the others, a ways off, the situation a momentary, instinctive stand-off. In the distance, the reshaping statue roars.

 

He ignores them, his tone too light now, biting. “I wished I’d known about his mark on you before… this would have simplified things, a lot.”

Obito’s face twists, with sudden fury. “Oh yes, as if you would have killed me.” He pushes up as well, glowering. “You could have, just now. But you didn’t.”

Kakashi snorts, ignoring the pang in his side. He lets the affection and humor shine through, despite everything. “Well, neither did you?”

Obito snarls, but is quiet, hands clenched around the box.

 

Madara’s voice comes, firm, but laced with something Kakashi cannot place. “Enough.” Obito turns to him, with a sullen and stubborn expression, and Madara’s eyes drop from his face to the box. He clicks his tongue. “I see.” There is a sharp smile on his face. “This is handy. These reanimated rinnegan do not wield the same power.”

 

Kakashi grimaces, calling back over his shoulder. “Sasuke. Naruto. Guy. We need that box.”

Madara twitches, snapping the Gunbai, and a slap of wind knocks Kakashi back, all the way back over and right before Guy’s feet. 

He grunts, the world twisting painfully as Guy pulls him up, with strong hands. “My rival!” 

Guy’s big, dark eyes blink at him, with a signature grin under it, but Kakashi can see the smudges on the jumpsuit, and the exhaustion bleeding through the expression. “Kakashi, are you alright?”

Kakashi nods, a bit wildly, but with determination. “Yes. Don’t worry about it.” 

Guy’s eyes flit to his left eye, the empty eye-socket. His voice carries fire. “He stole it?”

Kakashi exhales, and then shakes his head, once. “No.” He clicks his tongue. “I gave it back.”

Guy stares at him, astonishment in his tone. “Why?”

Kakashi tilts his head, and then turns back to Obito, silently cursing the missing depth-focus. He smirks, viciously. “By giving it back… I took away his excuse.”

Guy blinks at him. With a scowl.

Kakashi shrugs, with a grin now. “Later?”

Guy quirks an eyebrow, and then gives him a thumbs up.

 

Kakashi nods, and then refocuses on Sasuke and Naruto, who are going up against Madara now, in full bijou cloak and Susanoo, keeping him from Obito.

 

Who stands there, just the tiniest bit forlorn.

Watching Naruto and Sasuke hold Madara off.

 

 

Just watching.

 

 

 

Which obviously pisses Madara off, to no end.

 

 

 

Kakashi grimaces, shooting a weary eye at the big bijou filled ex-statue behind them.

It shifts suddenly, its mouth opening, and Kakashi’s gaze snaps back to Madara, who is weaving hands signs, mid jump.

Next to him, Guy shifts his stance. 

Kakashi grunts. “Oh no.”

 

The reformed statue, the juubi opens its mouth, a black ball of chakra forming in front of it. 

A shiver runs down Kakashi’s spine, recognizing the ball from back then, the image of the fox against the night sky forever burnt into his brain. 

 

Only there is no Minato here, now, to transport it away. 

 

He opens his mouth to scream, to scream at Naruto and Sasuke to get out of the way, but it will be too late, won’t it, and this time I cannot push the explosion somewhere else either, because I gave him my eye, oh god, it’s too far to reach, it’s goi…

 

There is a displacement of air behind them, and Ino’s voice, ringing out: “Ninpō: Shintenshin no Jutsu!”

 

 

The juubi jerks and…. misses.

 

Somewhere, ways off, mountains rupture.

 

 

 

Ino gasps, loudly, while sputtering, and pushing herself up from the ground again, where she had fallen when the mind transfer had engaged. 

Her voice is rough. “It threw me out. Already.”

Genma exhales, loudly, while offering her his hand. “Good work though.”

Neji steps up to Kakashi, his gaze flitting to Kakashi’s left eye socket for a moment. “We needed a moment to pinpoint and then pick up Ino amidst the fighting. But this… This escalated quickly?”

Kakashi grunts, tone dry. “Minutes on the battlefield are lifetimes…” He shoots Ino a look. “Inoichi-san is at the command center?”

Ino nods, exhaling, and then steps up to Kakashi. “You want me to relay a message?”

Kakashi nods, expression grim, watching Madara hold his ground again against Sasuke and Naruto. And Obito, staring still. 

He tilts his head to her. “Yes. I want them to stop. Do not come here.”

There is a pause, and Kakashi frowns, looking at her. “What.”

Ino raises her eyebrows, and Genma interferes, taking the toothpick out of his mouth.

He shrugs, a bit sheepishly. “Too late?”

 

Kakashi’s gaze whips around, scanning, and then cursing, loudly. 

He and Guy share a look.

 

Kakashi turns his head, yells. “Naruto. Sasuke. Back here. Now.”

 

The golden head turns, and then shares a look with Sasuke, before jumping back.

 

Kakashi can see Madara smirk. 

He grimaces. 

 

 

Fuck.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

The green chakra pouring from Sakura’s hands mutes the pain in his side, and on his chest. 

But it doesn’t mute the throbbing in Kakashi’s empty eye socket.

 

The empty eye socket that Naruto had stared at, with an open mouth, and a shiver in his voice, as he had asked Sakura to heal Kakashi’s other wounds.

 

Kakashi wants to smile, but he is too troubled, deeply unsettled by the ease with which Madara just waits for them to regroup, to arrive. 

He shoots Guy a look. “What is your impression?”

Guy inclines his head, tone hard, the usual exuberance missing. “In order to defeat him I will need to open at least the seventh gate. Maybe more.”

Kakashi nods, ignoring the commotion all around, as the armies try to take up formation. “And I cannot use chidori anymore.” He feels Naruto’s gaze, like a lead weight, and Sasuke’s assessing one, like a scratch. “At least not like I used to.”

Sasuke’s voice is icy heat. “Why did you give it to him?”

Kakashi exhales, in a rush. “You know why.” Although that is only part of it.

Sasuke pulls a face, and Naruto looks back and forth between them, eyes a bit wild. He’s back his slightly dirty, clad in black and orange self, obviously preserving chakra. “Why? What do you mean?”

Kakashi sighs, and then tilts his head back, reaching up to place his hand on Sakura’s for an instant. “Thank you, Sakura-chan.” He pushes up, with a grunt, and shakes his head. “I gave it to him because it belongs to him. And…” He raises his eyebrows, nodding at Obito, who still stands on the battlefield, clasping the box. There, in the middle between Madara and them.

 

Torn.

 

Kakashi hums, continuing. “And if he wears it he cannot wear the other pair.”

Naruto blinks at him. “I see.” 

Sasuke clicks his tongue, with an annoyed undertone to his voice. “I’m the one who will have to wear them, don’t I.”

Kakashi smiles gently, while Naruto’s voice rings out. “What?”

A memory of Jiraiya’s voice comes, lapping at Kakashi’s mind, gently. ‘… a dark haired man, with weird purple eyes.’

He exhales, feeling suddenly mellow. And so the wheels turn. And fate and destiny and time entwine. “Yes.” He shoots a look at Sasuke. “I believe you are strong enough. And I know the eyes you wear now are Itachi’s…” 

He quirks an eyebrow, looking back at Sakura, who stares at them, mutely. The ninjas around them are focused on them as well. “They should be fine in the box he keeps the rinnegan eyes in. Sakura will need to be with you and Naruto, and she will need to do the operation. I don’t want you to experience the loss like I did.” He frowns, before looking at Sasuke. “Although you already know what’s coming.” 

He sees Sasuke flinch, involuntarily. Ah, I see that wasn’t much fun either. He grimaces.

 

Naruto sniffs, and then chuckles, a sound that’s definitely on the wobbly side. “Well… I’ll miss your eyes… but… it’ll match your Susanoo?”

Sasuke snorts, and then leans in, kissing Naruto, quickly. He mumbles, against Naruto’s lips. “Baka.”

Naruto grins, a bit forcedly, while reaching up to press the pads of his fingers under Sasuke’s eyes. 

 

There is an intimacy to the gesture which hurts, beautifully.

And it doesn’t help that Kakashi remembers the touch, vividly.

 

Kakashi swallows, very proud of himself when his voice is steady. “You won’t be able to wield all its powers immediately. But it is enough if he doesn’t get them.” He inclines his head towards them, but doesn’t look, his gaze back on Obito. 

 

He tilts his head, calling back to Neji. “Please use the byakugan to scan. There must be something about this place, this spot…”

It’s Hinata who answers, voice calm. “There seems to be a cave system beneath us. Filled with Zetsus. They’re linked somehow.”

Kakashi nods, shooting her a quick look. Noting the small, proud smirk on Neji’s face, who is standing next to her. 

He clicks his tongue. “As I thought. That status has not been summoned here without reason.”

He probably needed the initial energy of the Zetsus for it to feed upon.

 

 

He licks his lips, opening his mouth to speak, but there is a commotion off to the side, and a GASP, that ripples through all of the battalions, all of the formations, all of the ninjas arriving around them. 

 

A gasp, that comes with a sense of surrealism, and awe.

 

 

 

Naruto’s eyes grow wide, almost comically, as something flashes up to him, impossibly fast.

With eyes that are black and yellow instead of white and blue, and a smile, a smile…

 

A smile that is for Naruto and Naruto only, there, now, and love and awareness pouring from it. 

 

 

 

 

And Kakashi blinks, slowly, when Minato reaches up, as if in slow motion, to gently lay his hands onto the sides of Naruto’s face, thumbs stroking. 

When the smile turns wobbly, and painful. “My son.”

 

 

Naruto sobs.

 

 

 

 

Kakashi’s eye finds Obito’s, and the thought is bleak, despite the searing love and relief he feels right now. He sees the tears drop from Obito’s eyes.

He’s here. They’re here. I bet she’s here, too. They’re all here, aren’t they.

 

 

All the pieces are set.

 

 

 

 

 

And way down the barren landscape… Madara chuckles.

Notes:

Adapted the tags… bc it's not just "mentions of" now^^ *waggles eyebrows* 😅🤗

ALSO - I’m away for several days next week, I won’t be able to post (write, or edit), SORRY. So next update will be on June 4th 🤗

Chapter 39: Candle in the wind

Notes:

I really liked Juubito in canon, however that development didn’t fit here. And, despite it all, I also really liked Kaguya showing up at the end… the notion that, no matter who you think you are, and how >untouchable< you think you are, there’s aaaaaalways someone more powerful who will use YOU… that was a very fitting thing for Madara in canon imho. I’m twisting it all (quite) a bit differently here, obviously.

 

Also: While this has a vague… slapstick moment there (you’ll know when) I DARE any of you to say that she would NOT have done that. I dare you :)))  (And I HATED that they’d omitted her in canon. There was no logical reason given her skills, especially for Kabuto to have her as a trump card?!)

 

And: chapter warning… burning. I guess. 

I mean, nothing in here is anything we do not know as jutsus from canon. Still. 

 

EDIT (Sept 4th, 2022): I have included fanart here, that I was gifted, by the beautiful SD_27. It comes with the text, so I was chewing a bit on whether I -should- include it directly... but I feel it is too beautiful not to. I have therefore included it under the scene itself, I hope it won't hurt the reading flow too much, but... just look at it. 💕

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

The moment Minato turns to him, Kakashi cannot breathe.

 

He still cannot breathe when Minato hugs him, the blond hair tickling along Kakashi’s face. The arms that are so strong pulling him in, tightly. Decorum be damned.

 

Kakashi absently notes he’s taller now. By an inch or so.

 

And isn’t that weird.

 

He blinks, and then pushes his head down into the embrace, into the junction of shoulder and throat, for a moment.

 

Minato smells different, now.

But that was to be expected. It’s a reanimated body after all.

 

And there is no heartbeat under the pale skin.

Kakashi blinks, trying to make sense of his feelings. 

 

Any of them. 

 

He realizes he might be in a bit of a shock here. 

 

Minato chuckles, voice low, while his hands press even closer for a split second. “You’re still thinking too hard, I see.”

Kakashi blinks, again, hearing Naruto snort, with a sniff.

His own arms come up, slowly, finally, pressing into the white cloak. Hold fast, for a long moment. His throat clicks as he speaks. “Is she here, too?”

Minato hums, the tone somehow carrying his affection. “Yes. She’s coming with the others.” He gently releases Kakashi, stepping back, before turning back to Naruto, who is watching with teary eyes, and Sasuke, who is watching with weary ones.

 

Kakashi sniffs, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose.

He feels Guy come up, silently put his arm around his shoulder.

 

Kakashi inclines his head in thanks, but forces himself to ask, knowing he has to. “How… come you are here, now? And not fighting us?” I was so afraid you would be fighting us? Him? How…

 

There is a salacious voice ringing out from the other side, accompanied by impressions of power, arriving. The ninjas surrounding it part, like a wave. “I… decided to raise them in Kabuto’s stead.”

Kakashi’s mouth drops open, just a bit, staring at his… entourage. The ninjas around fall dead silent. Staring, too.

At the faces they all know, from tale and stone.

 

And the face he knew, for years of his life.

 

And her face, crumbling now, as she races at Naruto, literally falling around his neck.

Minato steps back, just a bit, with a chuckle, and then moves in to hug them both. 

With a sob.

 

The world wavers, blurry and hurting.

 

He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “Why?” I don’t understand.

Orochimaru shrugs, with a long sigh. “I… Kabuto followed my path, my ambitions.” He looks around, at their army, and at Obito, standing there. “When I heard you had freed Sasuke and Itachi… and when I heard of them…” He shoots a very poignant look at Naruto and Sasuke. “I knew it would fail…” The long tongue comes out, licks the smiling lips. “I do like to be on the winning side, Hatake Kakashi. And… my goals have changed.”

Kakashi snorts, derisively. “Oh yeah?”

Orochimaru shrugs. “Oh yes. And I would like to continue my life… and not be subject to a dream.”

Kakashi grunts, while narrowing his eyes. 

 

The Sandaime speaks up, tone hard. “And you want us to believe that?”

Something flashes across Orochimaru’s face, something that is echoed in Kakashi’s gut.

Kakashi doesn’t recognize his own voice. “Shut up, Hiruzen.”

 

There is a shocked silence, as all the four kages and everyone in hearing range stare at him.

Kakashi fidgets, and then steps out of Guy’s half-embrace, and up to Hiruzen.

His voice is calmer than he feels like being. “Be glad that Tsunade is not here right now. Or Jiraiya. But I will not have you judge us.” He snarls, behind his mask. “Any of us.”

 

Off to the side, Senju Tobirama tilts his head. He opens his mouth, but his brother, Hashirama, is faster. His tone is vaguely excited, the long dark hair shifting when he tilts his head.“Tsunade and Jiraiya? Where are they?”

Sakura speaks up, her voice vaguely insecure, but firm. “The Godaime is healing still, the fight with Madara has left the kages gravely wounded. But she will be alright.”

Hashirama’s eyes flash - with pride - and then sparkle, in an abject horror. “She’s kage?”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, opening his mouth to tell the first Hokage that Tsunade is doing a fine job, thank you very much, when Tobirama chuckles.

His dark voice carries vague annoyance, and affection. “Looks like you didn’t manage to corrupt her completely after all.”

Hashirama harrumphs, crossing his arms. And then he shoots a look at the battle field, at Madara. Who is yelling over at them. “Hashirama!! It’s about damn time!” 

Hashirama sighs, a sound that is between disappointment and relief and something other, something that Kakashi cannot name, obviously speaking to himself. “He’s here, too.” He points a finger, hollering back. “You come later!”

Silence, as everyone just… stares. 

Tobirama grunts, eventually, tone a mix of annoyance and heavy teasing. “Be glad that Mito isn’t here.”

Kakashi blinks, watching in fascination as the Shodai colors, deeply, mumbling something.

 

Minato’s voice rings out, firm but still carrying that note of kindness that tugs at something deep, deep down in Kakashi. “Where is Jiraiya-san?”

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, for a moment, unable to look at him, or Tobirama.

Naruto speaks up in the sudden silence, his voice carrying his pain. “He died.” He sniffs, his eyes returning to Kushina’s, who is still holding him tightly. “I loved him so much? He taught me so much?” He sniffs again, and then nods at Kakashi. “And he was so good for Kakashi?”

Minato’s eyebrow quirks and Kakashi colors, helplessly, spectacularly. Definitely not thinking about anything.

Sasuke grunts, with what might have been a snort.

Kushina reaches up, ruffling Naruto’s hair. With a sigh. “He did good then.”

Naruto smiles, wobbly, and Kushina hums, and then steps back, just slightly. She narrows her eyes, and then reaches to pull up her hair into a high ponytail, frowning at the wisps of hair falling onto her forehead.

Sakura hesitantly offers her a hitai-ate, which she accepts with a soft smile.

She nods at Madara, while tying it. “So. He’s our enemy?” Naruto nods, wiping at his eyes, and Kushina shoots a look at Minato, who inclines his head. Towards Obito. Kushina blinks, and then gasps, stepping away from Naruto with a quick squeeze to his arms and steps forward, staring at Obito.

Kakashi swallows, following her eyes.

 

Obito shivers.

 

Kushina blinks, and then raises her eyes to Kakashi, smiling brilliantly. 

Her voice carries her love. “You gave it back to him.”

Kakashi nods, simply unable to do anything else. 

Or say anything, suddenly. 

 

He feels empty, spit out.

He has the sneaking suspicion that Obito might feel the same.

 

And Madara, too.

Despite the smirk.

 

Even legends are not safe from emotions it seems.

 

Kushina smiles softly, gently, understandingly, but makes no move to hug him, obviously aware that it would break him down, right now.

Kakashi’s fingers itch to touch her hair.

He wonders if it still feels the same, as back then. Would be the same to brush.

 

Kushina exhales softly, and then turns to Minato, her voice wobbly. “I understand why now. You wanted him to be able to protect him.”

Minato’s face crumbles, for just an instance, before it clears again, though his voice still carries the shiver. “I couldn’t tell you. I wanted to. But…”

Kushina shakes her head, stepping up to him and falling uncaringly around his neck. Her eyes sparkle, though her voice is cracking. “I don’t remember much, from the other side, but… Where were you? You… weren’t with me?”

Minato envelops her in his arms, for a moment, and then sniffs, shaking his head once. “Well, the jutsu worked.”

Sorrow passes over Kushina’s face. “I see.” She shakes her head once, and then shoots Orochimaru a look. “I have to thank you for releasing him from it, then.”

Orochimaru blinks, and then smiles, in a bit of a weird way. “My pleasure.”

Kakashi narrows his eye.

 

Naruto speaks up, with a sniff, and a little wobbly grin. “So, what now?”

Hashirama speaks up, with a sigh, as Minato and Kushina step apart again, and look at him. “Now he will play whatever trump card he’s holding, because he knows he doesn’t have time for any elaborate scheming.”

Tobirama grunts. “Yeah well, I bet he’s been scheming anyways. It runs in his blood.”

Hashirama rolls his eyes. “Could you, for once, stop insinuating it’s all the Uchiha’s fault.”

Tobirama glowers. Silently. 

Hashirama sighs and looks around, his gaze eventually hovering over Sasuke for a long moment. Who stares at him, defiantly. Hashirama clicks his tongue. “I only see three Uchiha here… what happened.”

Kakashi blinks, opening his mouth, but Sasuke is faster, his tone cold. “A lot.”

Tobirama looks at him, with a vaguely amused expression. Sasuke glowers back. 

Hiruzen shifts, to his other foot. 

Hashirama blinks at him, too.

Minato speaks up, tone calm and firm. “This is not the time.” He sighs, shooting a look at Hiruzen, and Kakashi has the distinct feeling that he knows, somehow.

For a split second, he wonders if the jutsu they both used might have joined them in hell. 

 

Kushina nods. “Right.” She starts walking towards Obito. “Just a moment.”

 

Kakashi watches after her, flabbergasted. What? 

 

Tobirama clicks his tongue, tone vaguely amused. He nods at the juubi. “We should probably seal that thing away, before it keeps on going on spitting chakra canons?“

Hashirama nods, watching Madara watch Kushina walking over to Obito. His voice is serious suddenly. “Yes, it’s drawing sen energy and growing on it. It’ll only get worse.” 

Kakashi frowns. “It’s growing on sen energy?” He grimaces, a thought occurring to him. “Life force, too?”

Hashirama’s dark eyes find his, for a moment. Silently.

Kakashi grimaces. So that is why you wanted the alliance here. You needed the life force of all the living beings to feed this thing. But… why?

Naruto speaks up. “Why isn’t he attacking though?”

Kakashi exhales, through his nose. Right. That is the question, isn’t it. 

Hashirama turns to him. “He can’t. Or… he doesn’t want to risk it yet. He’s only reanimated, like I am.”

As if hearing the words, the juubi falls down on all fours, and Madara jumps up onto the head, with a triumphant expression on his face. 

Hashirama clicks his tongue. “Though it seems he might be ready soon.”

Kakashi grimaces. “He told me he needed to summon the moon.”

Tobirama turns to him, the dark eyes hard. “Which is rising, right now.”

Minato’s voice is soft. “And it is a full moon.”

Naruto interjects, tone stubborn. “What does he mean with summoning it though? I mean it’s right there?”

Orochimaru speaks up, tone bitingly happy. “Supposedly the body of the ten-tails is the moon.”

Kakashi frowns, looking at him. “But… supposedly he created the ten-tails with the statue. Didn’t he?”

Orochimaru chuckles. “I really don’t think so.”

Sasuke speaks up, his eyes dark. “Whatever it is. I will burn it with Amaterasu.”

Naruto turns to him, yelling. “NO! There are other bijous in there!”

Sasuke glowers at him. “So? I bet they would rather burn, than serve him?”

Something stubborn enters Naruto’s features. “You will not burn them.”

Sasuke narrows his eyes. “Or what.”

Naruto doesn’t say anything, just glowers. 

 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, torn between their point of views.

Sasuke’s right. We should destroy it while we can… but of course Naruto knows what it’s made of. Has obviously connections to them. 

Connections that are hard to sever.

 

Like ours.

 

He frowns, turning away to look over at Obito.

 

Down the battle field, Kushina has now reached Obito. Who stares at her, obviously unable to do much else. 

Kakashi mumbles, more to himself. "Madara won’t allow us getting our hands on his eyes.“

Hashirama’s eyes snap to his. "His eyes?“

Kakashi nods. "In the box.“

As if on cue the juubi roars, gathering chakra for a bijou bomb. 

Minato clicks his tongue. "Let me.“

 

Kakashi watches, feeling stuck in a déjà-vue, as Minato redirects the explosion, just as Kushina reaches up to Obito.

 

A whiteout of light and sound, burning the image forever into Kakashi’s brain.

When the noise stops, sense does not return.

 

Or at least that is what it feels like, because…

 

Over on the other side, Kushina drags Obito back to them. 

By his ear. 

 

Kakashi stares, a part of him amused while another big, big part of him is hurting.

 

Reality seems off somehow.

 

This must be what out-of-body feels like…

 

The others seem to share a similar aspect of this state, or at least the founders do, because there is a pause between them that has nothing do to with shock. 

Tobirama clears his throat. “Impressive.”

It’s not totally clear whether he means Minato or Kushina. 

 

Hiruzen speaks up, for the first time since Kakashi yelled at him, definitely indicating Minato. "How often can you do that?“

Minato grimaces, shaking his head once as the juubi gathers chakra again. "Not often enough.“

Hiruzen nods. "Alright. Sealing formation.“

 

Kakashi watches as the reanimated kages jump down, and over taking up formation. 

There is a swish and Kakashi grimaces, gaze following Madara fleeing the impending seal. 

Sasuke sighs. "Looks like he doesn’t want to be caught.“

 

Kakashi nods, watching the seal flare up, the chakra walls enclosing the juubi.

His tone is dry. “Nope.”

 

He shoots a look at Naruto, who is sporting a small pout and a glower, staring at Obito. 

Who is now standing shivering before them.

Still clutching the box.

 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, shooting a look over at the little spot in the distance that is Madara. “The fact that you’re here and he’s not coming at us means either that he’s not as strong as he wants to be, or…”

Kushina sighs, pushing a long strand of hair behind her ear. “Or he doesn’t need them after all.”

As if on cue the creature roars again, tails slashing against the seal’s walls. 

Kakashi frowns, shooting her a look. Or he is planning something else with them. He nods at the juubi. “Could you bind it?”

Kushina shrugs. “Maybe. But only for a short while. It’s simply too strong. If it was made up from one bijou only…” She trails off. 

Naruto pipes up, inching closer to her. “Bind it?”

She nods, grinning at him. “Yes, with the adamantine chains of the Uzumaki clan.” Her eyes sparkle. “I always wanted to teach them to you so you had a means of controlling it.” Her face falls for an instant, and then clears again, deliberately, with a smirk. “But you found your own way, Naruto, a better way. A way that he would not have accepted from me.”

Naruto blinks, looking down at his stomach for an instant, before he nods, once. “Yeah, Kurama only accepted me because I didn’t use means like that.”

Kakashi calls to him, softly. “Kurama?”

Naruto looks up to him, with a bit of a wobbly smile. “That’s his name. They all have names.” He pulls a face. “Hard names.”

Sasuke chuckles.

Kushina’s eyes flit to him, seeing a lot. “And you are?”

Sasuke shifts on his feet a bit, straightening up. 

Kakashi almost snorts, missing Sasuke introducing himself, his attention diverted. Yeah, I know the feeling. I would feel the same if she… He stops his own thought, the sudden pain coming with the realization that Kushina does not know of the bond heavy and vicious.

His attention shifts back, to where Kushina is now hugging Sasuke, to Naruto beaming at them both. For a split second Kakashi’s and Naruto’s eyes find each other.

Awareness throbs.

 

Wounds.

 

Kakashi averts his gaze, unable to look at Naruto right now, uncomfortably aware that everyone is watching.

 

Obito’s gaze is sympathetic and heavy.

 

 

 

That’s not helping either.

 

 

 

Sakura clears her throat, pointing her finger. “Look, the kages are returning.”

Kakashi blinks, grateful for the distraction, frowning at Minato when he drops to the ground in front of Kakashi. “You left bunshin there?”

Minato nods, shooting a look at the roaring creature. “Yes. For now, it should suffice.” He frowns. “The other kages want to confront Madara.” He turns away, somewhat hesitantly, turning to face Obito. 

Who gulps, knuckles white where his fingers are clenching on the box.

 

Minato steps up to him and addresses him, more or less speaking to himself. “But I needed to talk to you… If only I’d known it was you back then. Perhaps we wouldn’t have ended up like this.”

Obito cackles, a sound that is filled to the brim with pain. “You were my teacher, and yet you didn’t realize it was me… that’s…” He trails off frowning. And then sobs, once. “Where were you? When…” He breaks off, and there is a pause, as all eyes are on him.

Minato blinks, his voice soft and calm and… tired. “When Rin died?”

Obito nods, a bit wildly.

 

Kakashi tries not to feel. 

 

There’s this part, deep, deep, deep down in him that’s wondered, too. Fretted, too.

Though he knows, of course. He knows of the mission Minato was sent onto.

Still. Feeling is a different thing.

 

Minato shrugs, just the tiniest bit, face completely expressionless. “On a mission. Killing the enemies.”

 

Kakashi blinks, his eye finding Naruto’s for a split second. He hears his voice in his mind, the simple statement that had rung so true back then. ‘Killing stains the soul.’

Kakashi frowns. And we all have killed so much. So often. Still do. He exhales, softly, shooting a look at Madara, who has flopped down on the rocks a ways over now, petulantly, waiting for Hashirama.

 

Minato’s whisper draws his attention back. “I’m sorry, Obito.”

 

Obito sobs, once. 

Kushina steps up to Obito and takes the box from him, matter of factly, pushing it at Minato, before pulling Obito down, into an embrace.

Obito’s face crumbles, in slow motion.

 

Kakashi sniffs, averting his gaze.

Minato’s hand is heavy somehow, on his shoulder, the only think keeping him tethered to reality.

Kakashi doesn’t recognize his own voice. “Sakura, Sasuke… you should exchange Sasuke’s eyes now.”

Sakura nods, mumbling. “Yes, Sensei.”

Kakashi sniffs, and then nods, too, before stepping away from Minato, carefully, the motion taking a mountain of strength somehow, addressing the ninjas still surrounding them. The allied forces amassed. From the corner of his eyes he can see Genma flinch at something behind him, probably Sakura removing Sasuke’s eyes. 

He swallows. “Ino, please relay all the… events to Shikaku and Inoichi and Ao.” He shoots a look at Neji, who is standing next to Hinata. “Neji, please set up a defensive barrier from the members of your clan. Coordinate with the other clans to combine your skills in the most effective way.” Neji nods, and for a moment Kakashi’s and Hinata’s eyes catch, a moment that is filled with… equilibrium. There is an acceptance in her gaze, a quiet strength that Kakashi hadn’t expected.

Hoped for, yes, but not expected, somehow.

For some reason, it makes it easier for Kakashi to breathe.

Yeah. We both expected our life to be quite different, didn’t we. 

 

I need to talk to her later. The events I set into motion with Jiraiya and Tsunade need to be addressed. And resolved.

 

He blinks, nodding at the Lightning’s commanding ninja. “Erect a barrier around the alliance, infuse the mud wall of the Land of Earth with your style.”

 

Sakura exclaims behind him. “No, Sasuke, wait…”

Kakashi curses silently, swiveling round, watching Sasuke charge, sword drawn.

 

At Madara. 

Towards the other kages, who have taken up position close to him.

Naruto snorts and grins with a roll of his eyes, and then follows, racing along Sasuke.

 

Kakashi glowers, shooting a look at Madara, who just stands there, waiting.

 

Something is nagging at Kakashi’s mind, trying to rise to the surface, something in regards to the rinnegan, what was it? Something in regards to Nagato, something…

 

Kakashi watches Sasuke and Naruto bite their thumbs mid-jump, and then jump onto their summons.

And then it clicks, the realization rushing back. The memory, that Nagato had to be close to control. That the rinnegan has a range.

And that it’s Madara’s originally. 

Madara, who is wearing the literal twins of them, now. 

 

 

His voice is a croak, hurting in his throat. Screaming after them. “No… too close.” 

Sasuke is too close.

Those are Madara’s eyes. 

 

 

And the rinnegans are… linked.

 

Minato frowns.

Kushina’s gaze snaps up.

 

 

 

Time slows, with Madara’s hands coming up to throw the others back.

There is a pulse of power, that Kakashi can feel in his gut.

 

And a smile on Madara’s face that hurts.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It happens so fast. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There is not even a feeling within Kakashi, just void.

 

 

 

Naruto’s screams are loud, and furious, and pained, and futile, the black flames dancing along his skin.

 

Gamabunta vanishes again, in a puff of smoke. 

 

 

 

It’s different than in the prison. 

 

Somehow. 

 

 

 

There’s a finality to it, this time. 

Gravity. 

 

No.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Despair.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi’s tattoo burns… and then echoes into void, throbbing. 

He cannot think. 

 

 

 

 

Madara laughs, loudly, while blood drips from Sasuke’s wide, purple eyes. 

 

 

 

 

 

No. 

 

 

 

 

 

It… cannot be?

 

Not… ?

 

 

 

Again.

 

 

 

 

Thoughts, and sound and sense fade.

All there is is the throb of the tattoo, or lack of it.

 

There is a voice, whispering in Kakashi’s head. Bitterly.

‘And you know the promise of peace, don’t you. You know. And even if they pull him back…’

 

 

 

 

Long red, and black hair, floating in the air. Jumping close. And shorter pink.

Kakashi blinks, the world in staccato beats, the contrast too stark, shifting in and out of focus to the beats of his treacherous heart. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Naruto falls to the ground.

The black flames are dancing, still.

 

 

 

 

His form doesn’t resemble anything Kakashi recognizes anymore. 

 

 

 

 

The thought is like conjured by someone else, weirdly emotionless. 

Snuffed out, like a candle in the wind. 

 

In front of Naruto, Sasuke stares, in shock.

Kakashi doesn’t know whether Sasuke cannot do anything, or doesn’t know how to, or is shocked too deeply.

There’s a big part of him that doesn’t care.

 

 

 

Lightning twitches in his hand.

 

 

 

He watches blood drip from Obito’s eyes as he takes Amaterasu into himself, effectively dousing the flames.

Kakashi isn’t sure when Obito reached Naruto.

Or how.

 

 

And he really doesn’t care. 

 

 

 

He just knows he’s knocking Sasuke to the ground suddenly, hand raised, lightning flaring along fist and arm.

 

 

There is a single thought, in his brain. While his tattoo is silent.

 

 

 

You were supposed to protect him.

 

 

 

 

If he could have actually thought, he would have wondered who he meant.

 

 

 

There’s a hand clenched around his wrist. 

Stopping him from killing Sasuke. 

 

 

Who is staring up at him, prone, obviously also in shock. 

Not defending himself. 

 

 

Lightning shudders through Kakashi’s frame. 

 

 

 

Minato’s voice is rushed, a hiss, while he’s keeping Kakashi’s hand in an iron grip. “No no no no no Kakashi, look, they’re healing him, they revived him, see he’s breathing again, the fox will help now, too, trust me I know how you feel, this was horrible, and I know…” He swallows. "But Kaka-kun, this was Madara, not Sasuke…“

Kakashi doesn’t hear anything else.

 

Right. 

 

 

 

 

Madara. 

 

 

 

 

 

Chidori dances along his skin now, over his whole body.

 

 

 

Fine. I may not be able to aim it properly anymore, but…

 

 

 

Madara’s eyes twinkle as Kakashi charges at him, in amusement. 

Kakashi knows he should care, but he cannot. 

 

Not now. 

 

 

 

The world twirls as Kakashi is whirled around, Madara’s handsome leering face inches from his suddenly. 

The deep voice carries darkness, like an armor. "You are the one who took my eyes from me, aren’t you. Let me repay you.“

 

Kakashi can hear Minato scream, can hear the swish of him arriving in a flash. 

 

 

But still not fast enough. 

 

 

 

The pain is searing, once more, and darkness falls. 

 

 

 

 

Darkness absolute. 

 

 

Blessed darkness, twisting and dragging him down. 

 

 

 

 

The thought is almost a relief. 

 

I cannot see. My eyes… are gone. 

Kakashi exhales, feeling faint in the throb of renewed pain. 

He misses Minato obviously flashing him away from Madara.

 

 

 

I cannot see what this has done to you. 

 

I cannot see the pain in your eyes. 

The pain that I put there.

The pain that is always there now, when you look at me.

The pain of living once more, despite it all.

 

The pain I know. 

 

 

And… I cannot see you with him. 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi chuckles, darkly, madly, and Minato whispers, holding him tightly. "Ohhh Kaka-kun.“

 

 

 

 

 

Naruto screams when he returns to consciousness. 

 

Kakashi can hear Kushina sob, and then try to soothe.

 

 

He dimly wishes for his hearing to be destroyed as well, the pain in his heart vicious and pure, mixing unrelentingly with the relief that floods him. 

 

And yet, his tattoo stays silent.

 

 

 

Over on the side, there is sounds of fighting, probably between Madara and the other kages.

 

Minato’s hands knead his shoulder now, try to pull him up.

But he is silent, no empty words trying to soothe.

 

Kakashi is grateful for that, at least.

 

 

He blinks, the feeling of his lids closing on empty a weird thing, bringing back a memory.

To tip the scales of power, you sometimes have to sacrifice that which you value most.

 

 

Kakashi chuckles, falling forward on his knees, hand pressing onto the ground.

Which is shaking, with the juubi romping around in the sealed area.

 

 

There is a cry, sudden, from dozens of mouths.

Kakashi’s voice is raspy. “What is happening?”

Minato squeezes his shoulders. “I think Madara used the echo of his own eyes once more… He has drawn the juubi into himself.”

Kakashi frowns. “To what end?”

Minato sounds faraway. “He is using a jutsu…”

 

The ground shifts, and Kakashi falls down, with a grunt. 

Minato’s hand catches his head, obviously bent over Kakashi.

His hair tickles the side of Kakashi’s face.

Kakashi grunts. “And now?”

Minato sighs, tone dry. “There’s a tree growing from the ground.”

Kakashi exhales, and then pushes himself up again, onto his haunches. Minato’s hand is pressing into his lower back, kneeling besides him. Like Naruto’s hand had pressed, after Pain.

Kakashi wants to weep, but he can’t.

Not now. 

 

He inclines his head, addressing Minato, quietly, some sense returning. “What are the others doing?”

Minato’s hand shifts up, to hold his shoulder once more, his tone low. “They’re trying to stop Madara from starting another jutsu… but, judging from Madara’s expression…” He sighs, through his nose. “What is he trying to do, Kakashi. Do you know?”

Kakashi swallows. “Obito said they want to dream, eternally.”

Minato clicks his tongue. “The Infinite Tsukuyomi.”

Kakashi shrugs, just a bit. “That’s what he said, yes.”

 

Over on the side, Naruto’s voice can be heard.

Kakashi tilts his head, his heart beating, hard.

 

 

Minato’s voice is low. “He’s babbling something, but they don’t understand him. He’s trying to make Sasuke understand.” Minato snorts, very softly. “He’s very frustrated.”

Kakashi swallows, painfully. “Why are you here, with me? Instead of with him?” And fighting?

Kakashi can sense Minato look at him, can feel the hand squeeze, for just a moment.

Minato’s voice is laced with something Kakashi cannot place. “I don’t think I could help them, right now. If Hashirama and Tobirama, and Kushina and Naruto and Sasuke do not manage…”

Kakashi sobs silently, once. And so you decided to stay with me. You, the most powerful of us all. 

His voice shivers. “You could flash to him?”

Minato shakes his head, audible in his words. “No, Naruto and Kushina are too far away from Madara. He is very careful not to get too close right now.”

Kakashi frowns. “You could throw a hiraishin kunai?”

Minato clicks his tongue. “I only have a single one left. And it might be advisable to use that otherwise.”

Kakashi frowns, but Minato doesn’t elaborate, and there is a displacement of air next to them, and Minato shifts, obviously addressing it. “What is it?”

Hashirama’s voice comes, though Kakashi would bet it is a bunshin. “Madara just gloated that we cannot stop him anymore. That it only takes a moment longer because he only had parts of the eight- and nine-tails’ chakra.”

Kakashi snorts, feeling bitter. “All our forces… all the ninjas are really only chakra battery energy for the tree.”

He can sense Minato look at him, and then his voice comes, calm. “I think Kakashi is right. But there will be a build-up. We have to try within 15 minutes.”

Hashirama’s bunshin probably nods, because he only says: “Madara has changed, his form resembles now that of old tales.”

Minato’s voice is dark. “Yes, he resembles the sage of six paths, from the old scrolls.”

The bunshin’s voice carries a grimace. “If he can wield that power…”

Minato exhales, through his nose, and then squeezes Kakashi’s shoulder, pushing himself up. “Please ask my wife to come to me.”

Another shift of air, and Kakashi knows the bunshin is gone. 

 

He tries to keep his voice stable. “You should just leave me here. Help them.”

Minato chuckles, softly, obviously reaching down to clasp Kakashi’s hand for a moment. “I won’t leave my team again.”

Kakashi frowns, the pain in his heart sudden, and fathomless deep, the intensity of it nothing he had anticipated he could feel still. He swallows, compulsively, hearing steps off to the side. 

Obito’s voice is brittle, filled to the brim with emotion. Kakashi realizes belatedly that he must have been close by, all this time. “I wish she was here, as well.”

Kakashi can hear the smile in Minato’s voice. “She is. And you know it.”

 

Obito sniffs. 

 

Kakashi frowns, suddenly realizing Rin could not have been revived because only Obito knows where he buried her body. The body that had been missing, when Kakashi had woken up again, on that battlefield.

He swallows, resolving to ask Obito when this is all over.

One way or the other.

 

 

 

And then Obito thuds down onto his knees next to Kakashi, his hand reaching for the one that Minato holds, too. His voice is a whisper. “Forgive me.”

And the words come, deep from within Kakashi. It’s easier to say them now, too, in the absolute dark. “I already have. A long time ago.” And it’s the truth, too.

I forgave you, sometime while I was with Sora. All the hate and despair… changed into longing.

It was why I was able to use your eye.

Minato chuckles, just softly. “See. She’s definitely here now.”

Kakashi sniffs, and then cackles, once. Yeah. You’re probably right. Or at the very least sitting at a nice, cozy fire with my father. He swallows.

Obito’s forehead presses into his temple for a moment. His voice is a whisper. “We have to stop him.”

Kakashi blinks, feeling tears and blood run down his cheeks. His voice sounds broken. “What does he want with that tree.”

Obito sniffs, his hair tickling Kakashi’s skin when he shakes his head. “He doesn’t want the tree. Or the jutsu.” He cackles, viciously. “He wants the fruit.” He swallows, audibly. “The dream was just… a convenient byproduct I think. Something that fit the plan. I always knew I think, but… I… I wanted the dream.”

Kakashi frowns, tilting his head. “The fruit?”

Minato hums. “I believe this must be the legendary chakra fruit that is said to spontaneously evolve the one eating it to a new level of abilities.”

Obito whispers. “Sheer power.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, bitingly sarcastic. “See. That actually makes sense.”

Obito snorts. Bitterly.

Minato’s hand comes up to clasp both their hands. “He can easily repel ninjutsu, and genjutsu is equally powerless. Ideas?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, with a small smile. “Guy will be able to stop him. He already tested the waters, earlier. He knows what to do.” But I won’t be able to see him use the gates after all.

Minato hums, but it is Obito who interjects. “There’s also someone looking like… my alter ego, like Tobi, coming in on a Mokuton summoning.”

Kakashi frown, deeply. “But the only one able to use wood summons apart from Hashirama-sama is…” He trails off, his heart beating, hard. Tenzou. He hisses, letting his agitation leak through. “We have to stop it, but must take care not to hurt the one commanding it.”

Minato squeezes his hand once. “Alright.” There is a shift as he obviously twists to look at the Mokuton. “Ah. I believe Orochimaru is already fighting it.”

Kakashi frowns, heavily. “Orochimaru?”

Minato clicks his tongue. “Yes. And…” He pauses, tone shifting just slightly. “And there are more ninjas arriving on clouds of sand… they’re powerful, but exhausted. A blonde woman has joined Orochimaru now, directing him.”

Kakashi nods. “The other kages.” Thank you, Godaime. He smiles, for a moment, knowing she won’t let Tenzou get killed. “So Naruto was right, he didn’t defeat them. At least not completely.” He swallows, the small smile dripping off his face. His voice is a whisper. “How is Naruto?”

He expects Minato to answer, but it is Obito who does, his voice carrying awe, and a shiver. “Beautiful. He is clad in his bijou cloak, glowing like the sun.” Obito snorts, but it is a gentle snort, full of longing. “He is what I aspired to be.” Another pause, and then he obviously addresses Minato. “He looks like you, in that chakra cloak.”

Minato’s voice carries his smile. “Yes, he only needs to grow bangs…”

Kakashi snorts, more tears dropping. He sniffs, and then pushes up, turning his unseeing eyes to Minato. “Take me back to the alliance? I know you put a hiraishin kunai there. I need to… I want to talk to Guy for a moment.”

Minato takes him by the hand, his voice soft. “Of course.”

Obito holds onto his other arm.

 

A moment of nothing, and then Obito gasps, stumbling a bit. 

Minato’s voice is low. “But you could have done that yourself, couldn’t you. Flashing here?”

Kakashi smiles, a bit painfully. “Yes. But I’m not sure if I could have transported Obito here with my strength reserves.” And I wanted him here, relatively safe.

Minato chuckles, once. “I see.” 

 

Guy steps up to them, his hand reaching out to clasp Kakashi’s free hand. “My rival. How it pains me to see you like this.”

Kakashi gives him a deliberate eye smile, belatedly realizing that without the actual eyes it must look grotesque. 

He lets the motion fade again, with a sigh. “Guy. Both, Minato-sama and I believe that Madara can only be defeated by taijutsu.”

Guy nods, the motion transmitted through the hand holding his. “As we have tested earlier, he is susceptible to sufficient force, yes.”

Kakashi nods, swallowing. His voice is a whisper. “I’m sorry I won’t be able to watch after all.”

Guy chuckles, and Kakashi knows that he is grinning broadly now, thumb raised in a thumbs-up. “Ahhh, but my rival, you bear witness. What else could I possibly wish for?” Guy sniffs, squeezing his hand. “I have told Lee that this is no time to cry, but to jubilate. It’s time. Konoha’s blue beast is no more.” He inhales, deeply. “It’s time for the red beast to emerge.”

There is a pause, and then Guy squeezes Kakashi’s hand again, once. “It’s true that everything we wish for will not come to be… but the things we ought to do will always begin with a wish.”

Kakashi’s face crumbles, and he knows it shows, his heart hurting.

Guy hums. “Don’t mourn me, my rival. It’s time to sit back and enjoy the show.”

Kakashi snorts, bitterly, but Minato interjects, gently. “I will be your eyes.” He inhales. “It is my absolute honor to witness the eighth gate being opened.”

 

There is a small pause and then Guy squeezes Kakashi’s hand, and he steps back, while everyone around them quiets down. 

 

Kakashi inhales, shudderingly.

 

Minato’s hand is there, in his lower back. Lending strength.

Obito whispers, in awe. “I’ll bear witness for you, too.”

 

 

 

There’s swishes and shuffling, as the kages and the others jump back to them, out of the way.

 

 

Minato relays the fight to Kakashi, with whispered words.

Obito hovers close, his presence felt, though he is silent.

 

 

 

 

Tears of blood drop from Kakashi’s eyes.

 

 

Kakashi can feel the energy pulse, when the eighth gate opens.

Hears the gasp of amazement ripple through the amassed forces.

Through the lines of elite ninjas.

 

He swallows, harshly, the pain in his heart debilitating.

And now… now you will burn up. 

Almost like he did, earlier. Flake by flake will drift away from you, until there is only ash left.

 

Another massive gasp, as the earth shakes.

 

Minato’s voice is low. “He is in ‘Night’ form now. He has kicked Madara across the plane and against the tree, hurting him.” Minato pauses, before clicking his tongue. “Madara is not getting up again.”

 

 

 

Excitement that spreads, like a wave, while Kakashi’s heart hurts. 

 

 

 

Naruto’s voice pipes up, rushed, and Kakashi frowns, feeling nothing, somehow, but realizing belatedly that they must have jumped back, too. Of course. “Mom, you have to pull out a piece of each of the bijous out of him, now. You have to give them to me!”

Kushina’s voice is a bit taken aback. “A piece of them?”

Naruto is silent, and Kakashi can just hear him nod, wildly.

 

Somewhere, deep down within him, the black tar that encloses his soul gets a crack.

 

Kushina is obviously still wondering. “Why?”

Naruto groans. “Tell you later. It’s something…  Kurama told me. You know I tried to tell you earlier, but…” He obviously waves her off.

Kushina must shrug her shoulders, her voice calm. “Alright. Just a moment.”

 

There is a sensation of nothing and then coldness, rushing by Kakashi.

And a gasp, running through the people around.

 

Minato chuckles, very quietly. 

 

Naruto’s voice comes, excitedly. “And now, push the chakra into me.”

Kushina clicks her tongue. “Alright.”

 

Hashirama’s voice comes, calm and yet imploring. “Whatever it is you think you’re doing, we have to hurry. Madara has indeed been defeated by this taijutsu master, but he is regenerating.”

Tobirama grunts, tone dry, biting. “Of course he is.”

 

Kushina whispers. “Very well, here you go.”

 

 

 

There is a literal pause in time and space.

 

 

 

Kakashi frowns, feeling it throb, right there. 

It’s imminent, somehow. 

 

A power that can almost be touched.

 

Another gasp, rippling through the crowd.

Minato’s voice, whispering. “Oh my god.”

 

 

Naruto’s voice sounds vaguely different, vaguely… relieved.

He clicks his tongue. “I’ve… received six paths senjutsu.” 

 

There is a shuffling sound as Naruto steps over to someone, and there is this pulse again, and Naruto’s voice, carrying a smile. “And Sasuke has received the full rinnegan. It is his now.” 

Minato’s voice is breathless, a whisper, there between Kakashi and Obito. “The powers that Rikkudo Sennin was said to possess.”

Naruto hums, having obviously heard him nonetheless. “Yes.” There is a small pause, and then he speaks up again. “I’ll be right back.”

He steps up to Minato. Kakashi can almost taste him in the air. “Dad. Can you flash me to Guy? I know you put a hiraishin kunai at the base of the tree.”

Minato’s hand leaves Kakashi’s lower back. “Sure.”

There is a whisper of a touch, there over Kakashi’s mask. And Naruto, humming. “I’ll be right back, Kakashi.”

 

Kakashi shivers, turning his face away, with an effort.

Obito’s hand is cool in his neck. Thumb rubbing, gently. 

Obito’s voice is low, and exhausted. “His sage markings have changed. The pupils are crossed but yellow. He is now wearing globes, too. Globes similar to the ones Madara has. He…” He pauses, and Kakashi can hear the frown in his voice. And then Obito gasps a laugh, as small shouts rise all around them. 

Kakashi tilts his head to look at him.

Obito’s voice is wobbly. “He has stopped the eight gates’ disintegration.” He sniffs. “Well, almost completely, I think the foot took damage already. But I can see that Guy-san is breathing.” Obito’s voice lowers even more, with a whisper. “He’s breathing, Kakashi.” He hesitates, and then the words come, with another stroke of his thumb. “You haven’t lost your friend.”

 

The words echo somehow, between them.

 

Drenched in meaning.

 

 

And they hurt.

 

 

 

There is another pulse of power, and then chakra that touches Kakashi’s skin, cool and hot and smelling of summer and home and…

 

Kakashi shivers, under the hands that are holding his head now. Gently. 

 

Naruto’s voice is low, very low, there between them. His thumbs touch Kakashi’s skin, over the edge of the mask. “I spoke to your Dad, earlier…” He hums, and then chuckles, warmth and pain in the sound, in equal measure. “I didn’t really want to return, you know… we talked about that. About the peace offered there.”

Kakashi’s voice is a rasp, bleeding from him. “Why did you?”

Naruto’s thumbs stroke, for a moment. “He told me you did, too.” A pause, that hurts. “He told me that you came indeed back for me.” Chakra tickling along and into Kakashi’s skin, but he cannot think, cannot feel, there, suspended in this vague hold in Naruto’s hands. 

Naruto continues, slowly. “I realized that I cannot be the man you didn’t know how to be… because you already are.” He chuckles, softly. “And I gave up fighting the pull back.” He snorts. “And I spoke to… And here I am.”

There is the sensation of motion as Naruto leans in, their hitai-ates connecting with a soft clink. 

His voice is a whisper. “And now we’ll fully tip the scales of power.”

 

 

Pain, sudden and vicious.

 

Traveling along his eye-sockets, and the hurting flesh, towards his brain.

 

 

 

Oh.

 

 

 

Kakashi grits his teeth against the scream. Rears back, just a bit.

 

He is panting, not recognizing his own voice, the tone dark, and gravely. “I don’t need eyes. If I do not have eyes I cannot see what I did to you. What dying did to you. I cannot see the pain in your eyes anymore.” I cannot see how you look at him anymore. He swallows. “I don’t need eyes… just that you are alive.”

Naruto’s voice is wobbly. “Oh, Kakashi.” His head tilts, the lips hovering over his left eyelid for a split second. Naruto’s voice is so low, Kakashi knows only he can hear. “You always make my skin tingle.” He exhales softly. “I want you to see me.”

Kakashi sobs, quietly. 

 

 

There’s a whisper of cloth, and then Obito’s voice comes, haltingly. “You always were set on repenting for your sins, Kakashi… but these sins are not of your own making. I have my sharingan back now, remember? I can see… what you saw. What you did.”

There is a shuddering inhale. 

Naruto’s fingertips are burning on Kakashi’s skin.

Obito clicks his tongue. “We had this connection, for longer than you had the one with him…”

Kakashi feels Naruto freeze, for a split second, something that does not go past Obito, because he huffs a laugh, voice vaguely apologetic. “I can see what he saw… feel what he felt when he looked through it.” His voice drops to a whisper. “Feel what he felt when he looked at you, Naruto. I think it was this feeling that pulled me back, eventually.” Obito chuckles. “My sins are many, and yet… Yet I stand here now, with him and you, and your parents…” Obito sniffs. “Kakashi urged me to take the sharingan back, and it is mine… but it also has to be his. I… He has been my teether to… reality for so long, I cannot bear to know it is gone.”

Naruto’s voice is wobbly. And harsh somehow. “What did Kakashi feel when he saw me first?”

There is a dark smile, audible in Obito’s voice. “Despair.” His voice drops to a whisper. “And terrible, terrible longing.”

 

Kakashi shivers, held by the sun. His sun.

He doesn’t know what to feel, beyond that simple, searing feeling.

 

Another whisper of cloth, and then a thud, as Obito drops to his knees next to Kakashi. His body heat is cool somehow.

Obito’s throat clicks. “I need to repent. If you let me. But I need to be rooted in reality.” A shivering exhale. “I… want to be connected to him again.” Obito chuckles, obviously seeing Naruto freeze again, for a split second. “If you allow it, of course.”

Another rustle of cloth, and then Obito’s voice is extremely near, his presence enveloping them somehow. “Connect me to him again.”

Kakashi frowns, not understanding.

Obito whispers. “Bakakashi.” He hums, shifting again, just a bit, obviously addressing Naruto once more. “Copy my eyes for him.”

Something in Kakashi grinds to a halt.

What.

The fingers on Kakashi’s skin shift, just a bit. “You want me to copy your eyes?”

Kakashi can sense Obito nod, wildly, while his mind is still stuck. “Yes. I want him to have them.”

“I…”

Kakashi’s voice is gruff. “No. I gave it back.” It brought you back. I won’t allow that to be voided.

Obito sighs, and Kakashi could bet real money that he’s rolling his eyes now. “I’m not going to disappear just because I want you to have something of mine, you know.”

Kakashi swallows, harshly. 

Naruto pipes up, voice coming haltingly. “But… I remember the bouts of chakra exhaustion… having two will drain him even faster?”

There’s a smile in Obito’s voice. “I’m sure you can create them for him.”

There is a pause, and Kakashi opens his mouth, eventually, tone gravelly. “Naruto, you don’t…”

Naruto interjects, and Kakashi can hear the frown. 

Naruto’s voice is a harsh whisper, addressing Obito. “If I try, you will repent. You will fight with us, you will make repairs in any way that is possible for you. You will be at his side, support him, whenever you can. You will never, ever try some stupid shit to end the world again.”

 

Kakashi’s heart hurts.

 

Obito sniffs, quietly. “Deal.”

 

Something very, very precious break open, deep, deep within Kakashi.

 

 

Kakashi’s voice is dry, carried on something he cannot name. “Do I get a say in this?”

He can feel both their attention shift. Their voices come in unison. “No.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he snorts.

 

Obito’s voice is soft now. “Naruto… you are like my negative. An inverted image. You are what I aspired to be, once upon a time. Please… let me give something back now.”

Naruto swallows, audibly, and then his left hand leaves Kakashi’s skin, and the absence of it is burning, hurting.

Next to him, Obito exhales.

 

Naruto’s right hand shifts up, to lay gently over Kakashi’s right eye.

 

Kakashi cannot think. 

 

He shivers, and Naruto hums, and then there’s pain again, and pressure, and light, flaring darkness, the stars exploding, carried on a very peculiar sensation.

Kakashi gasps, swaying on his knees.

Naruto exhales, shudderingly, hand shifting to Kakashi’s left eye.

Pain, pain once more, and exploding lights.

 

Obito sniffs.

 

Naruto’s voice is soft, broken somehow, shivering. “Open your eyes, Kakashi.”

 

Kakashi stares into darkness, against his closed eyelids, knowing he is seeing again already, the nerves connecting the new tissue to his brain tickling somehow. 

 

Dreading what he’ll see when he opens them.

 

Naruto’s whisper comes, so low Kakashi has to strain to hear it. “Open your eyes.”

 

 

And Kakashi does, simply unable not to follow the soft command.

 

 

 

The light of the moon is hurting, the world in stark black and white contrast.

 

The sun is hovering in front of him, crossed pupils filled with tears.

 

 

 

Kakashi gasps, shivering like a leaf now, staring at Naruto.

 

 

Whose gaze is… breaking. 

 

For a moment.

 

 

 

And then Naruto’s eyes widen, and his mouth drops open and… Kakashi’s tattoo pulses.

He sobs, knowing what it means.

 

And now, now you have recognized the bond. 

 

 

 

 

Now you know what I felt, for so long. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The truth of it.

 

The power of it.

 

 

The attraction of it.

 

 

 

 

And it… hurts.

 

 

 

 

And Naruto whispers, there between them. Broken.  “It’s not fair.”

 

 

Kakashi cackles, harshly. He reaches up, with shaking fingers, holds Naruto’s jaw in his palms. 

The words come by themselves, carried on the truth thrumming in him. “And now… I see the world through your eyes… I used to see it through Obito’s… but now. I see it through yours. And his.”

Naruto’s face crumbles. “You know?”

Kakashi chuckles, softly. “That you created my new eyes from my cells, his cells and your own?” He swallows, throat clicking. “Yes.”

I don’t know why but I know.

Naruto nods, with a sniff.

 

Obito speaks up, gently, voice laced with understanding and exhaustion. “I guess you’ll have to reawaken them though.”

Kakashi snorts, still trying to burn Naruto’s image into his brain. “Well, there’s always something.”

Naruto giggles, helplessly.

 

 

And they fall silent, once more, in their own little bubble of reality.

 

Kakashi breaks it, eventually, whispering, while the crossed pupils hold his world. “What happens now?”

He’s not sure what he means, whether it is the bond, or the war. 

 

Naruto’s voice is a whisper. “I don’t know.”

 

 

 

Sasuke speaks up, the sudden presence of him a jolt that travels through Kakashi. His voice is soft, but also hard, the emotions hidden. Addressing Naruto. “I remember… I remember meeting you in that flying castle. You insisted that you loved your Sensei.” 

 

He comes closer, kneeling down next to Kakashi and Naruto. His hand reaches out, slowly, to trace the black sage markings hiding the whiskers on Naruto’s face. The fingers are dirty, and Kakashi stares at them move, as if transfixed. “If I go now, leave… will you follow? It is up to you, you know.”

Naruto’s voice is broken, laced with pain. “Leave?”

Sasuke’s smile is sharp and cutting deep. Kakashi cannot look at it. “I know of the bond… you know that. But I also know that you do love me, too. We’ve seen each other’s hearts.” He tilts his head, the purple eyes eery in the pale moonlight. “Will you come with me… now?”

 

There is weight to the question, a weight that Kakashi can feel in the pit of his stomach.

 

 

 

He knows what Sasuke is asking.

Remembers Yugao’s voice, and the smile in it when she told him about the bond engaging… and accepting it.

He knows this is Sasuke’s way of asking if Naruto is breaking up with him, for the bond, now.

 

Kakashi shivers, unable to breathe.

Torn between hope and guilt and desperation - and the past and the future.

Obito places a palm on his back between Kakashi’s shoulder blades.

Holding, supporting.

 

 

 

Waiting.

 

 

 

Knowing what’s coming.

Just as Kakashi does.

 

 

 

Kakashi wants to weep.

 

 

Sasuke pushes up, slowly, and then walks away, towards the tree.

Naruto blinks, and then pushes up as well, turning to follow Sasuke.

 

 

 

He hesitates, looking back, and it is this look of pain and sorrow and desperation and sheer, pure love that burns itself into Kakashi’s brain and heart and soul, this look, that should be so different now.

 

 

 

But isn’t.

 

 

 

 

Kakashi doesn’t remember falling down, but he must have, because the ground is scratchy, wet somehow.

 

 

 

 

Minato kneels down next to him, pushing one finger under Kakashi’s chin, gently. The chakra coat feels like gentle flames, licking at Kakashi’s skin through the mask. 

Minato’s face carries sympathy, and pain, and love. 

His voice is infinitely gentle, drenched with feeling. "Up.“ The finger presses, oh so gently. "Up, Kaka-kun. It will be alright. And you know it.“

Kakashi raises his new, painfully sensitive eyes to Minato’s black and orange ones, and sobs, once. 

Latching onto them, for dear life. He doesn’t recognize his own voice. "Yes, Sensei.“

 

Obito’s hands are under his arms, and around his shoulder, supporting him.

 

 

Kakashi cannot look at him. 

 

 

 

He redirects his thoughts, with an effort, not now, not now, you cannot think about it all now, his voice shivering as he addresses Minato. “Did you intend for me to be able to reach Obito when you marked him?” He swallows. “Like… Naruto?”

Minato’s smile is swift, and sharp. “Sadly, I did not recognize Obito then.”

Kakashi frowns, pulling at the shreds of his composure, by sheer will. “So you wanted me to be able to reach the enemy?”

Behind him, Obito shifts.

Minato pulls a bit of a face. “I knew you would become one of the strongest shinobi - and that you would survive.” Minato exhales. “At least until Naruto would be around sixteen.”

Kakashi sniffs, nodding, He stares unseeing at the people staring at him. 

 

 

Off in the distance, a huge rasen shuriken cuts part of the tree off.

 

 

Kakashi smiles, grimly, proudly, at the gasp rippling through the army.

 

 

Kushina is there, suddenly, her eyes huge on his.

Her smile is blinding, eyebrows waggling. “You know, you should put those new eyes to good use, Kakashi.” She tilts her head, to where Sakura and Hinata are standing, grimly. “And there’s a member of your team still, waiting for her entrance.”

Kakashi shakes his head, once. “She already saved him.” And I will never ever be able to repay her for that.

Kushina rolls her eyes, her voice vaguely admonishing. “She is much more than a healer though. She has completed the Strength of Hundred‘s seal.” She reaches out, squeezing his arm, to say what she cannot or will not say now.

Not now.

Kakashi blinks, his eyes catching with Sakura’s for a moment, before he returns his gaze to Kushina’s. He clears his throat. “Right.” You’re right. Not now. And she doesn’t deserve to be reduced to one aspect only. None of us do. He lifts his chin. “Sakura-chan, please come here.”

 

Sakura comes over, after squeezing Hinata’s hand for a moment, her green eyes all fired up. “Yes, Sensei?” Her eyes flit to the people around him, blushing just a bit.

Kakashi swallows, vowing to talk to her, later. 

He nods, eyes flitting up to the new mark on her forehead for a moment. “Sakura, we’ll do the introduction rounds a bit later.” He clicks his tongue. “Ready to enter the fray?”

A slow grin spreads over her face, and Kakashi could swear that the sign on her forehead pulses for a moment. “I thought you’d never ask, Sensei.”

 

Kushina smirks, and then she frowns, her eyes flitting to something behind Kakashi. 

Kakashi turns, to see Madara taking the tree into himself.

Kushina shifts, on her feet. “Looks like he recovered a bit. You should hurry.” She grins up at Sakura. “Give him hell.”

Obito snorts.

 

Minato pipes up. “There’s a hiraishin kunai laying on the earth, it must be the one Naruto took with him earlier.” He looks at Kakashi. “I think you can manage.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, wondering at that estimation of his chakra reserves, and stepping back and then reaching for Sakura and Obito. “I see.” He frowns. “You’re not coming with?”

Minato tilts his head. “The Infinite Tsukuyomi traps the living… We will be here if you fail.”

Kakashi nods, some sense of calm returning. “Very well.”

His hand tightens around Obito’s waist, around Sakura’s shoulder. “Ready?”

The corners of Sakura’s eyes crinkle.

 

 

 

Nothing, nothing, and the cold of space, for just an instance.

 

 

 

Golden chakra, encased in purple.

Kakashi blinks, realizing they’re in the Susanoo-clad fox form. 

 

Sakura cracks her knuckles. “I can create an opening for you.”

Naruto flashes a smile at her, his eyes flitting to Kakashi’s for a split second. “Sakura-chan!” He whoops, his golden eyes sparkling. “Team 7 is reunited!”

Sakura grins, and Kakashi blinks, shivering, while pasting an eye-smile on. Right. That, too.

He shoots a look at Obito, who gazes at him solemnly. And then clicks his tongue.

Obito’s voice is dry. “You know, that eye-smile looks quite scary, especially with those bloody tear tracks on your face.”

Sasuke actually snorts.

 

Kakashi sniffs, and then nods, once. Trying. “Ah well, you know, I was thinking about going to the onsen earlier, but I thought you might need my help…”

Sasuke quirks an eyebrow, careful, deliberate humor in his voice. “Think we cannot manage on our own?”

Kakashi waggles his own. “He’s still standing, isn’t he?”

Naruto’s voice carries a pout. And relief. And something else Kakashi cannot place. “Not still though. Again.”

Obito heaves a sigh. “Yeah, he is good at that.”

Kakashi swallows, pushing the thought of the cost of Guy’s try earlier away. “Yeah, so I heard.” He frowns, shooting a look over his shoulder. “I’m actually surprised the Shodai is not here. Or the other kages.”

Sakura speaks up, tone calm. “They came by earlier, when you were… You know, when the thing with your… eyes happened. The Yondaime discussed the situation with them. I think they agree that they should let us try, since Naruto is the only one with full sen energy.” She grins, cracking her knuckles again. “And you heard Kushina and the Yondaime just now. But I cannot wait to try my own taijutsu on him.”

 

Kakashi opens his mouth to answer, but Naruto exclaims, loudly. “Ewww.”

Kakashi’s mouth snaps shut, following his gaze. 

 

Madara’s body bulges.

 

Kakashi frowns. 

 

And then Madara jumps up, high, high into the night sky, hands flying.

 

Kakashi grunts. “Shit.”

Sakura’s tone is hard. “We have to stop him, now.”

Naruto’s rasen shuriken whirr up again, twin impressions of light, and sound, and power.

 

Sasuke shares a look with Sakura. “I’ll come at him from above, you’ll kick him to Naruto.” He looks at Naruto, then at Kakashi. “Naruto, you’ll cut him apart this time.” He hesitates for a split-second. “Kakashi, you find a way to activate your new eyes.” His eyes flicker to Obito for a moment, but he doesn’t add anything.

Kakashi grimaces. Right. And still not calling me Sensei, huh.

 

The thought is only bitter for a millisecond… because watching Sasuke flash up to Madara and corner him, and then Sakura kick him down, right into the whirring wind blades is… very satisfying.

 

Obito’s voice is dry. “They didn’t fight alongside each other for how long?”

Kakashi grunts, watching Madara crash to the ground, split in half.

Only to have Madara’s upper half push up again and fly up, still weaving signs. 

Black rods rain down on them.

 

A third eye opens, on Madara’s forehead.

 

Obito’s voice is definitely carrying annoyance now. “Oh come on, you…” 

 

He trails off and for a split second Kakashi wonders what he might have wanted to say, but he blinks instead, watching tomoes appear on the Moon’s surface. Sees it change color, gradually. 

He hisses. “Fuck.” The next words are yelled. “Sasuke. Naruto. Sakura. Down here, now!”

 

 

 

They drop to the ground, back into the Susanoo clad fox chakra, when the moon turns red.

 

 

 

A pulse of something, going through mark and bone.

 

 

 

Naruto falls to the ground, holding his head, breath coming fast.

White strips rain down from the tree, swishing out to capture the living outside their chakra enclosure, wrapping them almost gently. 

Obito’s voice is low, warning. “Everybody stay here.”

Sasuke snarls, quietly. “The tree is taking them. One by one.”

Sakura sniffs, reaching out to rub a shaking Naruto’s back. “What can we do?”

Kakashi exhales, through his nose. “If the legends are true, the tree won’t kill them right away. And obviously…” He looks up, at the purple and orange glow surrounding them. “Obviously the Susanoo and the fox…”

Naruto pipes up, pushing himself up, with an effort, expression still pinched. “Kurama.”

Kakashi blinks. “Kurama?”

Naruto nods, a bit jerkily. “His name. It’s not a thing. It’s a ‘he’. And he’s called Kurama.”

Kakashi blinks, and then smiles, softly. “Right. The Susanoo and Kurama seem to be able to protect us.” He clicks his tongue. “So our goal stays the same. We have to stop Madara.”

 

Sakura grimaces, pointing her finger, voice coming haltingly. “I… is that still Madara though?”

Their heads swivel round, refocusing on their enemy, who is floating at a short distance above them… bulging again.

And with a black Zetsu punching Madara through his chest.

 

Obito calls out, to Madara, despite it all. 

 

 

They stare as chakra slams into Madara, the limbs and skin bulging heavily now, bloated. Madara’s face is squished and scared, in a mess of distorted flesh.

 

Naruto and Sasuke charge but Kakashi knows it is too late, somehow, too late to stop.

 

 

 

It only lasts an instant.

 

 

 

 

And she is much more beautiful than he anticipated.

Breathtaking.

 

Otherwordly.

 

Long white hair, and lilac eyes, and the sharingan as the third on her forehead.

Her skin seems translucent, and the horns on her forehead do give the impression of a hare’s ears… but that is where the similarities to the legend end.

 

Her voice is like a bell, ringing. 

 

Kakashi shudders.

 

“This place is my nursery… let’s stop fighting.”

 

Naruto frowns, and then the world shudders and shifts, and heat eats at Kakashi’s skin.

He hastily twists in space and throws whatever he can reach, trying to find a hold, somehow, glad when he can grab Sakura too.

Glad when the kunai actually finds hold in stone.

 

 

 

Her little smirk is very clear in her beautiful voice. “Here. Let us fight here.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

I actually wanted to >not< go down the “Kaguya” path… but then I remembered the reverse harem and … I had to. *snickers*

 

And: can you tell that I really loathed the „missing“ interactions of Minato/Obito and Kushina and Kakashi in canon? Can you TELL????? 🙈😅

Chapter 40: Gift of time and healing

Notes:

Canon almost/quasi over!!! We‘re freeeeee 😅🤣😛🤗

I’m also skipping the dimensions (more or less) - since the back and forth is neither necessary for Obito’s nor Sasuke’s “redemption” arcs here… and, writing it, I realized I wanted a different way. For several reasons. Hope you’ll like it :)

 

And I’m sorry I made y’all so mad at me and Sasuke/Naruto the last chapters, but for a proper catharsis… the title of this chapter actually sets the tone for the upcoming parts, so I hope you guys will forgive me eventually^^

I do mean the tagged “Angst with a happy ending” :))

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

The scroll in his hand is uncomfortable to hold onto, especially with Sakura’s weight added on top of his own. Kakashi frowns, looking around, seeing Naruto float in the air, chakra hands holding Sasuke and Obito. 

He exhales, slowly. 

The scroll tears, just a bit.

 

Another chakra hand, faster than Kakashi can follow, catches him and Sakura, too.

 

Naruto giggles. “Oh, that is so cool??”

Sasuke looks at him, voice somewhere between amusement and annoyance. “You didn’t know you could float?”

Naruto shrugs, tone chipper. “No, I mean, the old geezer didn’t tell me?”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. Old geezer? He opens his mouth to ask, but Sasuke is faster.

His tone is carried on a sigh. “Yeah, he was kind of stingy with the details.”

Sakura whispers at Kakashi. “Who are they talking about?”

Kakashi grimaces, with a shrug. “No idea.”

 

Naruto tilts his head back, just a bit. “He said he was Rikkudo Sennin. He appeared to me when I took the bijou parts into myself.” He turns to look at Sasuke. “He told me how to give you the rinnegan powers, too.”

Sasuke nods, and then tilts his own head towards Kakashi. “And then that… old geezer appeared to me, too.”

Kakashi blinks. I see. He clears his throat, nodding at the woman, who is floating in the air in front of them, watching them silently. “Maybe we should…”

Naruto clicks his tongue. “Right.” He exhales softly, and then addresses her, with a bow of his head. “Kaguya-sama. Haguromo-san told us who you are. He chose us as guardians of this world, in his stead.”

Kakashi blinks, and then frowns, deeply. And he obviously told you her name? What she can do, too?

Kaguya frowns, too. 

 

Her pale eyes stare at Naruto and Sasuke, transfixed, and then she drifts away, into a sudden, geometrical rift in space. 

Kakashi’s frown deepens. Those forms are not natural. It must be a technique she uses. Some kind of technology, maybe.

The very substance of space behind Naruto and Sasuke opens, and she floats out, silently, gravely somehow, her hands coming up to lift perfectly manicured fingers to Naruto’s and Sasuke’s chins, turning them towards her, and lifting them, just a bit.

Kakashi gnashes his teeth, watching Naruto and Sasuke stare at her, eyes wide. 

Her voice rings out again, like a bell, vibrating through the lava filled cave. “My children…”

Kakashi can see Naruto shoot a look at Sasuke from the corner of his eyes.

And then his eyes twitch to lock with Sakura’s. And then, for a split second, with Kakashi’s.

Kakashi shifts his grip, preparing to throw Sakura.

 

 

Naruto exhales, and then gently, carefully, withdraws his face from Kaguya‘s touch. 

His tone is vaguely apologetic. “No, Kaguya, I am not your son, even if you may recognize some of the chakra in me.” He smiles, softly. “Unbelievably, my parents…”, he hesitates, swallowing, and Kakashi smirks, painfully, “my parents are on that plane you took us from. I can hardly believe it myself…” Naruto’s voice breaks, and Kakashi blinks rapidly, hearing Sakura sniff quietly. 

Kakashi’s gaze finds Sasuke, for a moment, the sorrow in them deep, and cultivated. But also calm, tamed likely by the fact that Sasuke has family waiting for him, now, too. Despite everything.

Naruto continues, voice shivering. “I do not know how much time I have with them, since they’re… I just don’t know. Please let us go back. Please let us find a way beyond fighting.”

Kaguya blinks, her large eyes expressionless, her fingers dropping away from Sasuke as well. 

Her voice is like a wind-chime, twinkling over the hiss of the lava below them. “Not my sons? But your chakra is of mine… and as such it belongs to me.” She tilts her head, a sad expression flitting over her face. “I can still feel affinity to you… but I can also tell that millennia have passed.” She frowns, the middle eye closing for a moment. “The tree has blossomed. The jutsu cast. The fruit will be ready soon.”

Sasuke speaks up, tone hard. “About that. We cannot let that happen. The tree is draining our armies.”

Naruto looks at him, adding. “It’s draining our friends. And family.” He exhales, pressing a hand to his chest. “The ones we love. We cannot let you take the fruit.”

Kaguya blinks, tilting her head. “The fruit is what was destined for all who live on this planet. It is how the Otsutsuki evolve.” She smiles, softly. “How I will evolve. It will make it possible for me to return home.”

Kakashi grimaces, feeling Sakura shift, just slightly. He exhales, deliberately. Just give the word, Naruto. Just a sign.

But Naruto ignores them, his eyes transfixed on Kaguya.

He raises his eyebrows. “I feel the need in you, for that chakra. But it is not you, not really, you tried to flee from all that. Free yourself from this process that literally devours the weak.” His gaze drops down, to her left sleeve, a sleeve that is big enough to carry deep shadows. “It’s not you who tainted Madara’s mind. It’s not you who led Obito on his path… it’s not you who facilitated your rebirth.”

 

There is a pause, as Kakashi tries to breathe, his mind racing. He looks over to Obito, who is just staring, seemingly transfixed. 

Sakura whispers. “Right… that thing.”

Kakashi blinks. Right. The black Zetsu. And it’s… in her sleeve? He shoots a look at Sasuke, who is staring at Naruto now. 

Kaguya speaks again, interrupting his thoughts. “You know nothing of me, child. So young you are, so naive.” She reaches out, runs her finger over Naruto’s chakra-covered cheek. “So intriguing, carrying so many pieces of the juubi.”

Naruto leans in, just a bit, voice low. “But I am much more than that, now. I draw on this world’s nature, Kaguya. I sense your heart and your mind. And the ones around us, now.” He smiles, gently. “I know that you long for peace.”

 

There is a whisper through the cave, barely audible over the hiss of molten stone. “Don’t listen to him, mother. He is trying to twist your mind. Remember, your sons locked you up, how can you possibly trust him?”

Naruto smiles, beautifully. “As I said. I am not your son.”

Kaguya blinks, her eyes shifting to Sasuke. 

Whose tone is dry. “Well, neither am I.”

The whisper again, loud somehow, echoing. “They will lock you up again, mother, don’t you see it, Haguromo gave them knowledge and chakra, to entrap you again.”

Kaguya’s face twitches, with something akin to sorrow.

She exhales, softly. “I will not allow that to happen, again.”

Naruto grunts, grimacing. “But we cannot allow you to keep draining the living. And feeding that tree.”

Kaguya blinks, very slowly. “I need the power to return home.”

The whisper again. “Yessss, mother, yes, let us return home, to the others, to him, he’ll forgive us.”

Kakashi frowns. He?

Out of the corner of his eyes he can see Obito narrow his eyes. 

Sasuke obviously catches on immediately as well. “Who is he?”

Kaguya’s gaze flits away, for an instant. Her voice sounds faraway. “No-one.” She exhales, her tone hard somehow, and resigned. “Very well. If you will not give your chakra to me freely… all the chakra on this world belongs to me. And I will take it.”

 

There is a moment, and then she seems to float back, just a bit.

 

 

 

Naruto jumps back, hastily, grimacing, fingers raising into a seal.

 

Kakashi blinks, tightening his grip to help Sakura push off. 

 

 

He can sense Naruto gather chakra, pull it together, somehow, and then…

 

Puffs of smoke, everywhere, and dozens of… men, in all kinds of variations. Well-built, handsome, naked men. Men flirting with Kaguya. 

 

Men in sexy poses.

 

With each other, too.

 

 

Kakashi is getting somewhat hot, his face heating up. Mortification runs like lava through his veins. 

His mind is also very carefully blank.

 

Out of the corner of his eyes, Kakashi can see Sakura blush, too. Deeply.

 

 

There is no time to think, not really, but there is this shiver, deep, deep down in Kakashi’s gut, way down beyond the alertness, and pain, and hurt, and exhaustion, and need… deep, deep down, very close to his longing, there where there is hope still, there… there is a shiver of amusement that is so deeply steeped in love he cannot breathe.

 

This shiver of amusement, that takes some of his broken pieces and tapes them together again, real quick. That makes it easier to breathe.

 

You… brat. Distracting our final enemy with… your sexy jutsu.

 

Seriously.

 

Kakashi’s mouth twitches.

 

 

One of the bunshin moans.

 

Kaguya’s gaze snaps to it.

 

 

Sasuke looks up at Sakura, as if in slow motion.

Kakashi pushes her, just as she kicks herself off, bruising Kakashi’s flesh.

 

 

 

Time slows.

 

 

 

Sakura’s hands are flying, glowing with green chakra in a complicated jutsu sign pattern, while the black lines on her skin growing from the mark on her forehead grow more intricate, more fine. 

Sasuke changes places with her, instantly, her momentum carrying her right into Kaguya.

Who grunts, an intricate geometrical pattern appearing behind her.

Kakashi yells. “She wants to disappear. Stop her.”

 

The whispered voice, that is screaming with laughter somehow, but also frantic. “You cannot stop her. She is a master of every natural dimension, she can escape from all of them, she can jus…”

 

Kakashi doesn’t hear anymore, his eyes finding Obito’s. 

Who smirks, darkly. Proudly. 

 

Sadly.

 

Kakashi’s heart beats in his throat, catching on immediately. Oh no, I won’t let you. Forget it.

He calls out to Naruto, to whoever he might be of those… men. “Naruto, we need to be close to her, NOW.”

He can see Obito scowl, from the corner of his eyes.

Puffs of smoke, swirling within reality twisting, and then a pull, as if someone punched Kakashi into the stomach.

 

 

 

 

They all crash to the ground, in the weird gloom of Obito’s private little dimension.

 

 

 

There is a pause, as everyone seems to gather their senses.

 

 

 

 

Kakashi can see Naruto pick up a small piece of old walnut and stare at it, frowning.

 

 

And then Obito laughs, gently. “Well, I can’t believe I’m quoting Kakashi now, but…” He pushes himself up, with a grunt, shooting a look at Kakashi, before addressing Kaguya. “All we can give you now is death.”

Kaguya doesn’t react, laying on the floor in the dimension, her white fingers pushing through the rubble everywhere. And the dried blood.

Kakashi frowns. 

 

Naruto stands up, back in his brilliant, golden self, staring at her.

And then he turns, to look at Sakura, who is standing next to Sasuke, shivering like a leaf.

Naruto’s voice is low. “It worked, didn’t it? You managed?”

 

Sakura twitches, eyes transfixed on Kaguya, while her empty hands shake. The black lines on her skin seem to pulse.

It’s Sasuke who answers, voice filled with something very close to awe. “She absorbed it.”

Kakashi blinks, stepping closer. What? “She what?” What exactly happened?

Sakura is still shaking, obviously still fighting somehow. Her voice shivers. “I… absorbed it.”

Sasuke shoots Kakashi a look. “The black thing, Kakashi. She took it into the Hundred’s pool and released its structure. I saw her extract it on the interdimensional travel.”

Obito pipes up, tone sceptic. “You saw it? That trip is instantaneous. How can you…”

Sasuke turns to him, quirking an eyebrow over purple eyes. Obito pulls a face, but falls silent, with a grunt. Kakashi’s mouth twitches.

Naruto steps up to Sakura, raising his glowing hands. 

His tone is soft. “Here, Sakura-chan, let me help you.” He lowers his head, placing his palms on her cheeks. Sakura gasps. 

It takes a moment, but eventually Kakashi can see the lines on Sakura’s skin calm down again, dull, the color flat once more, sharp, like a tattoo. 

He exhales, stepping over slowly, while keeping an eye out for Kaguya.

 

Who is looking up at them now, confusion on her face. 

Her voice is small somehow. “Why can’t I leave?” She blinks up at him, the lilac eyes filled with tears. “Why can’t I…”

Obito speaks up, while Kakashi stares at her. “This is my dimension. It is not natural in the sense of the word.”

Kakashi blinks, and then extends his hand. “And now a part of you has been removed… the part of you that wanted that fruit, badly, am I correct? The part that… wanted this war.” Our deaths. The part that was pitch black, obviously born from hate… I wonder what hurt you so badly to conjure such hate.

She stares at him, and he can feel the weight of the others behind him, can sense them watch, silently. 

 

Sakura steps forward, slowly, limbs still shivering, but there is strength in her voice again, and calm. Repeating. “I have absorbed it. It is no more. But I absorbed its abilities, too.” She smiles, a bit brittle, blinking rapidly. “So much power, so much hate.” She sniffs, turning to shoot a look at Naruto. “I can… sense the pieces of the bijous and the sheer strength in you now…” Her eyes flit over to Sasuke. “And the power in you, too.” She exhales. “The possibilities.”

 

Kakashi frowns, still extending his hand. “So what happens now?”

Kaguya stares at his hand, as if it was a strange object. Or poised to bite.

Naruto speaks up, irritation clearly in his tone. “The bijous want her safely locked away.”

Kaguya’s eyes snap to Naruto’s, with a shiver. 

Sasuke’s voice is hard. “That would probably be for the best.”

Obito speaks up, the wrinkles on his face twitching as he pulls a face. “I agree.”

Kakashi blinks, wondering for a split second when exactly they arrived at team status, but it’s a warm thought, filled with hope, not aggravation. 

 

And suffused with helpless want.

 

Sakura shivers, with a grimace, while the lines on her skin slowly retract. “She does not want to hurt us anymore.”

Kakashi frowns, shooting her a look.

Naruto sighs. “No, she doesn’t.” He rubs a hand over his face, voice muffled. “But we still have to stop it all, destroy the fruit, and eliminate the threat she and her… kind pose.”

Kakashi sniffs, mind returning to a snow-filled landscape for a split second, and to black-rimmed green eyes framed with red hair, eyes that had pushed Naruto, and had been filled with awareness. He sighs. “A difficult decision.” And that is an understatement.

Sakura looks at him. “Sensei, you’re probably going to be the next Hokage. It should be your decision.”

Obito’s head comes up a bit, but he stays silent, watching Kakashi intently.

Sasuke exhales, a bit annoyedly. “Well, at least Konoha knows what it’ll get then.”

Kakashi blinks, and then turns to him, mutely.

Sasuke shrugs, tone dry. “Given the past it could be much worse.”

Kakashi grunts, torn between amusement and annoyance. “So happy you approve.” 

Sasuke quirks an eyebrow, words laced with double meaning. “Yeah, well, someone still has to teach our usuratonkachi.”

Obito snorts, while Naruto exclaims, definitely not seriously. “Hey!”

Kakashi smirks, painfully. 

 

Naruto turns to Kakashi, and then his glow fades, slowly, deliberately, his torn and burnt clothes hanging about him in tatters. But his eyes are blue, so blue, and Kakashi swallows, knowing that this is why Naruto let the chakra cloak fade, now. 

For him.

 

Naruto’s voice carries his careful affection, and a shiver beyond that is what they have not talked about yet. What they couldn’t talk about yet. “Yes, Sensei… what should we do?”

 

And Kakashi knows suddenly that he is asking much more than just what to do with Kaguya, that Naruto is hurting, viciously, deep down, now that he recognized the bond, now that they had a moment to breathe again, that the imminent threat is gone.

 

 

That the bond is tearing at him, just as it does at Kakashi.

 

 

 

 

Conversely… it helps. 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi swallows, blinking the tears away.

He hesitates, and then speaks, eventually, reaching out to touch the scorched parts of Naruto’s clothes. “Healing takes time.”

Naruto shivers, blinking, rapidly.

Kakashi swallows again, and turns his head to look at Obito. “Having time to heal is a gift.”

Obito exhales, shudderingly.

 

Kakashi clicks his tongue, forcing the words out. “New and… good things can only… grow from healthy things.”

He can see Sasuke lift his chin, just a fraction, from the corner of his eyes.

 

Kakashi turns away. Addressing Kaguya. “If you wish to live… not be imprisoned, we will need to seal your powers.” He exhales, in a long rush. “And you will need to share your knowledge. You said there were others. We will need to prepare.”

Kaguya blinks up at him, with a lost expression on her face. 

Her voice is soft. “They will come, eventually.”

Kakashi nods, feeling very tired. “Because you did not return?”

Kaguya smiles, very softly, looking away. “Because I did not follow the rules, yes. And because the fruit has not been collected yet.”

Kakashi grunts, surprising himself with the humor in his voice. “Well, we have another maverick right here… we’re used to things happening because rules are broken.”

Naruto scoffs, crossing his arms, tone carefully petulant. “Bent. I bend them. I rarely truly break them?”

Kakashi grins, softly. Speaking more to himself. “Indeed.”

He turns his head, addressing Naruto. Carefully shaping the words. “You can bend the… rules a bit more, you know.”

Naruto’s eyes snap to his, something in them relaxing. “Really?”

Kakashi exhales, something in him relaxing further, too. “Really. It will be alright.” I know it.

 

Sasuke speaks up, his tone low, surprisingly careful. “But we need to discuss how far we bend those… rules.”

Both Kakashi’s and Naruto’s eyes snap to his.

Out of the corner of his eyes, Kakashi can feel the heavy weight of Obito’s and Sakura’s attention.

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “As… far as we can without breaking them?”

Sasuke snorts, something incredibly vulnerable in that single sound. His voice shivers, just a bit. Pushing. “And who gets to decide whether they do?”

Naruto crosses his arms, with a shiver.

 

And Kakashi smirks, softly, painfully, while his eyes find blue. “Well, as you and Sakura have  said… that will be me.” And you, Naruto. 

His eyes shift to Sasuke’s purple ones, for a long moment.

And then he blinks, with a careful, deliberate shrug, before turning back to Kaguya. “There is someone out there, or there are people out there, who can seal your powers away, to a minimum.” He locks his gaze with her large, lilac eyes, the resemblance to the Hyuuga clan’s and Shion’s quite obvious. “We would love to learn from you.” He frowns, looking away for a moment. “I believe we can offer you living with the priests in the Land of Demons, too. If you wish for a quiet life.”

 

Sasuke speak up, tone hard, but there’s sympathy in there, somewhere, too. “Otherwise we can seal you away again, as Hagoromo and Hamura did.”

Kakashi blinks, shooting him a look. 

Sasuke waves at him. “Long story.”

 

Kaguya sighs, and then speaks up, sounding forlorn. “I spent millennia in confinement already… and I have lost my literal will to fight,” Her eyes find Sakura’s for a moment, before looking away again. Her voice is low, but firm. “I would prefer a simple life, to the dark.”

She blinks up at Kakashi. “But I am not sure what I can tell you of them, truly… I have not seen them, for so long.”

Kakashi nods, and then holds out his hand again. “We’ll figure it out.”

There is another pause, and then her long, and yet small fingers close around his hand. The skin is cool, and it tickles. 

Kakashi leans back, pulling her up, gently. 

She seems to weigh almost nothing, a small chuckle pealing from her lips when she stands once more, eyes looking down. She sounds wistful. “It’s been so long since I actually felt the ground.”

Obito speaks up, a bit hesitantly. “Gravity here is slightly off though. It will feel different when we return.”

Kakashi nods, still holding her hand. “Right. We need to return.” He shoots a look at Naruto, with a small smile. “We need to talk to your parents. And end the jutsu.”

Naruto nods, with a weird little look at Kaguya’s hand in Kakashi’s, and then turns away, to Sasuke. 

Kakashi blinks, seeing Sasuke quirk an eyebrow.

Sakura speaks up, sounding quite chipper again, the obvious exhaustion of before gone. “How do we return?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow at Obito.

Who nods, once. Swallowing, obviously dreading the prospect of returning, and Kakashi cannot quite blame him, all things considered. “Let me.”

 

 

 

Kakashi holds out his other hand, and his team, his team steps close, and it is this moment that turns into sheer and pure awareness, this moment, when they all stand in rough circle, dirty, smelly, exhausted and done, with their enemy in their midst and the prospect of peace around the corner… this moment that turns final somehow, that marks… something.

 

And his tattoo tickles.

 

He blinks, realizing they’re all staring at him. Including Kaguya and Obito.

Obito’s face carries sadness… and a smile. “What is it?”

 

Kakashi shakes his head, and then chuckles, once, while reaching out with his free hand, to carefully ruffle Naruto’s hair. 

The words are torn from his mouth, raw, filled to the brim with awareness. “Your birthday is soon, Naruto.”

 

Naruto’s eyes widen, almost comically, and then Sakura giggles, and Sasuke snorts, and they all shift a bit closer to embrace each other, and Kakashi smiles, wobbly, and then shifts his gaze to Obito.

 

 

And the world drops away, in a swirl.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The purple eyes fade from the wrapped living, from all but Sasuke, who lowers his hands, staring at the mark in his palm.

 

Kakashi blinks, silently vowing to hear about that one, later.

From Sasuke and Naruto.

 

Kakashi watches Kaguya lower her hands, too, infinitely elegant, impossibly beautiful and poised.

 

Forlorn and regal and otherworldly.

 

 

Guarded by Tobirama, who is staring at her, almost rudely.

Kakashi’s gaze shifts to her hair, and then to Tobirama’s, and, for a moment, it hurts to remember him, and his ferocious laughter. He tries to imagine Tobirama carrying his equally pale haired grand-child around, probably tell him about the sage marks. 

Probably itching to tell him about their history.

 

Probably pouring all his love for his own lost child into the small boy.

While he could.

 

Kakashi blinks, wiping at his eyes for a moment.

 

 

Minato leans in, his tone low. “You really think we can trust her?”

Kakashi blinks again, with a frown. He shrugs. “Sakura took the Black Zetsu into herself. Naruto says he can feel no aggression in her. I think…” He hesitates, sharing a look with Minato. “I think Kaguya just wants to live again. She’s been locked up for so long… She poured her absolute will to escape her prison into that… thing. And it spent millennia manipulating lots and lots of key players… Madara, Kabuto, Obito… to only name a few. And now that it is gone, and she is indeed free…”

Minato nods, with a bit of a grimace, and a soft sigh, while he looks at Obito, who is sitting on a stone, a ways off, alone. “And a life to live is a gift after all.”

Kakashi swallows, eyes traveling over the cracks in Minato’s skin for a moment, over the black eyes, before shooting a look at Obito as well. “Yes.” A gift of time and healing.

They are silent for a moment, ignoring the commotion all around, with the shinobis waking up, and helping others, and trying to organize, and find out what happened. 

Kakashi can see the five current kages try to direct them, but they also seem to be pretty out of it, still.

 

For a long moment, Kakashi tries to imagine what everybody might have dreamt.

 

I know what I would have dreamt.

 

Minato seems to read his mind. “You know, your dream can still become true.” He clicks his tongue. “Will become true, soon.” His eyes narrow, just a bit, in gentle humor. “Trust me.”

Kakashi swallows, his eyes flitting over to Naruto, who is talking excitedly with Kushina, and Sasuke hovering nearby. “Yeah, well, we’ll see.”

Minato smirks, following his gaze. “I am so happy to see it all worked out.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Did it though? I mean, weren’t you…” Disappointed? That it was me? He grimaces.

 

For a moment, the pull is unbearable, scorching, and then it fades again, with the relief to be here, now. 

 

Alive. 

 

He swallows, making himself exhale, slowly.

 

 

For now… that has to suffice. 

 

 

Minato watches him, eyes seeing too much. His tone is soft. “I do not know how much time I have still on this plane of existence, Kakashi, but knowing my son would be bound to you was never a source of distress for me. On the contrary.” He turns to Kakashi, fully, and Kakashi cannot help turning to face him, feeling like he is 12 years old again, somehow. 

Minato smirks, gently. “I knew your heart, Kakashi. And I knew how viciously it broke.”

The world blurs, with a sob, torn from Kakashi’s throat.

Minato continues, still gentle, but firmly. “You never became the villain, and we are literally standing next to those who broke under the weight of living… Madara, Orochimaru… Obito. And somewhere, that Kabuto, too.” He hesitates, his yellow eyes flitting back and forth. “I know the burden I put on you…” He grimaces, just a bit. “And the gift of the bond I took from you.”

Kakashi shivers, but he shakes his head, interjecting. “But you couldn’t have let Naruto stay with us, nor could you have let our memories intact. Time travel is always a paradox, and…” He trails off, hurting viciously for a moment.

Minato exhales, eyes flitting over to Hashirama, who is kneeling next to Madara’s body. “Still.”

 

Kakashi frowns, following his gaze, deliberately changing the subject, with a sniff. “How come his body regenerated?”

Minato shrugs. “Well, half of his body was here still, when you left this dimension it started regenerating, as Edo Tenso bodies tend to do.”

There is a small commotion over where Hashirama is kneeling and Minato smirks, softly, with a little sigh. “Guess he woke up.”

Oh great. Kakashi grunts. “I sure hope we do not need to fight him again.” He lets his gaze travel round all the people still gathering their senses, and clutching at the remnants of their dreams. 

He clicks his tongue. “Waking up from a dream that you really loved can be harsh…”

Minato hums. “Yes, and waking from the perfect dream must be terrible.” He sighs. “No matter the cost that it demanded.”

Kakashi nods, and then sighs, gently. “I’m glad I didn’t dream.” He swallows. “I’m only used to nightmares.” And longing. And even going to the … vestibule almost broke my will to live. Dreaming the perfect dream…

Minato shoots him a look. “Obito now has the visual memories that triggered a lot of those nightmares.” He hesitates, and then adds. “He has the memory now of what he only knew was the truth… I believe it will bring him peace, eventually.”

Kakashi starts, frowning, and then he looks down, staring at his hands. Right. The pain and feeling of her is gone now… at least in the intensity I remembered before.

Seeing the blood on them, for just an instance.

 

Minato’s hand comes up, to squeeze Kakashi’s shoulder.

He shakes Kakashi, just a bit. “Go. Go to your team, Kakashi.”

Kakashi swallows, and then smirks, painfully. “But there’s more than one team 7 here, now… Or almost.”

Minato chuckles. “Indeed. Still. Go to the complete one, now.”

Kakashi exhales, and then shakes his head. “No, not complete. Complete… only with Sai and Yamato.”

Minato quirks and eyebrow, and Kakashi shrugs, once. “Long story.”

Minato nods. “Tell it to me later. Here or, if we don’t have the time, in the beyond.”

Kakashi exhales shudderingly, and then nods, once. “Yes, Sensei.”

 

 

 

 

He turns, and then starts walking towards his team, still flocked around Kushina, and joined right now by Sai, who is hugged, by Sakura.

Kakashi’s heart beats hard, once. 

 

His eyes search the plane, trying to find Tenzou for a split second, but he cannot see him, though the big wooden structure of earlier has been obviously halted, and partially dismantled. 

 

Kakashi steps up, slowly, shoving his fists into his pockets. 

Desperately tries to seem nonchalant. “Yo.”

“Sensei!!” 

Kakashi smirks, the unison of Sakura’s, Naruto’s and Sai’s voices in various states of excitement a curious and… warm one. 

He exhales, and then gives them a deliberate eye-smile. “We did it. I am very proud of you.” He swallows, continuing the thought, and allowing the feeling to be felt, fully. I really love you guys right now. He smirks to himself. And yes, that includes you, Sasuke.

Kushina’s eyes twinkle, but her voice is gentle, not teasing. “Can I hug you now?”

And Kakashi nods, a bit wildly. “Yeah.” He opens his arms, and she falls into them, chuckling, and Kakashi pushes his nose into her red hair, holding on for dear life. 

Out of the corner of his eyes, he can see Naruto smile, broadly, wobbly. Sasuke puts his arm around Naruto’s shoulders.

 

Kushina chuckles, voice also wobbly. “You’re so tall.”

Kakashi snorts, and then sniffs. “Yeah well… though I bet Naruto’s going to be taller than me.”

Kushina shifts, to look up at him, eyes sparkling. She waggles her eyebrows. “I noticed.” And then she sobers, her voice calm once more, intense, filled with a plethora of feelings. “Thank you for guarding him.”

Kakashi’s face falls, and he shakes his head, once, painfully aware of all the attention trained on him. Their attention. He presses the words out. “Not as good as I should have.” 

Kushina hums, weighing her head, hand softly stroking. “I remember knowing that you did your best. It’s all a blur now, since we’re on the other side of the veil, but…” She clicks her tongue. “You did your best, I know that much.” She blinks, her tone growing hard. “And I need to… talk to Hiruzen.”

Kakashi sniffs, and then releases her, carefully, trying not to look at him.

Because he can sense Naruto’s attention, like a caress. 

 

For a moment, nothing else exists.

 

And then Kushina steps away, her hand squeezing Kakashi’s arm.

She reaches up to caress Naruto’s dirty cheek, with a small, vulnerable smirk. “I hope we have the time for you to show me all your skills, and to tell me about your life… I want to know it all.”

Sasuke speaks up, with a snort. “Oh, you should have seen the jutsu he used to distract Kaguya.”

Sakura blushes, spectacularly.

Sai blinks at her, tone deadpan. "Kage bunshin?“

Naruto grins, very broadly. "Oh yes…“

Kakashi snorts, ignoring Kushina’s somewhat confused look. He clicks his tongue. "You took quite a gamble with that jutsu…“

Naruto touches his left fang with the tip of his tongue for a moment, eyes glowing. There’s laughter in his voice. “Well, Rikkudo Sennin told us she fell in love with a handsome prince, and that is why she abandoned the plan to harvest this world back then… so I thought that she might be susceptible to it.” He beams at Kakashi. “I’ve been practicing it more than the rasengan. Secretly of course.”

Kakashi snorts again, shaking his head. Of course. You imp.

Kushina pipes up, frowning. "Why secretly.“

He might be mistaken, but Kakashi thinks Sakura is blushing even harder, while Sasuke obviously fights hard not to grin. And blush.

Naruto shrugs, nonchalantly, while his eyes find Kakashi’s for a long, long moment, making Kakashi itch. "I created lots of… enticing men for her. Who were having fun. And inviting her to it.“

Kakashi closes his eyes, trying not to remember. 

Or imagine.

 

Trying not to imagine the possibilities, and insinuated tries, too, turning his thoughts to the hilarious aspect of it instead. 

With an effort. 

The number one maverick ninja. Who’d have thought Naruto’s pervy ninjutsu would save the world. Are you watching, Jiraiya?

 

He smirks softly, remembering Jiraiya telling him that Naruto is coming more after him, than Minato.

Well, that is no surprise, is it. We’ve both spent a lot more time with Jiraiya, than with him.

Kakashi swallows.

 

He reopens his eyes, shooting a look over at Minato, who is watching them, quietly. 

He exhales softly. Looking so much like him though… and with the strength to move the world. Like father like son, in many ways indeed, despite everything. 

Out loud he addresses Naruto once more. "You were always unexpectedly cunning.“

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, grinning. "Unexpectedly?“

Kakashi nods, deliberately grave. Teasing. “Oh yes.“

Sakura snickers.

Naruto’s head lowers, just a bit, while he smirks at Kakashi, salaciously.

Kakashi tries to ignore how Kushina’s attention… shifts.

 

The thought comes with vague, but also somewhat glum humor. Great. Now I’m sure she’ll catch on, and then I’ll have a front row seat eventually finding out what exactly she thinks of it being me, aaaand Minato keeping this particular bit of knowledge from her as well.

 

It’s probably a good thing the area is already destroyed.

 

He inhales, deeply, letting the thought go, nodding at his team. “Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura, Sai… excellent work saving the world.” He hesitates, and then adds, trying hard to keep his composure. “And for all the healing, the sealing and for restoring…”

Obito to himself.

My eyes.

 

Our lives.

 

He falls silent.

Sasuke speaks up, voice quiet. “I am sorry you lost your old sharingan, Kakashi.”

Kakashi blinks up to him, and then shrugs, once, opening his mouth to respond, but Naruto is faster.

He looks at Sasuke, with a small frown. “But he didn’t?”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, with a small sigh. “Right. Obito said I probably need to reawaken them.” He shrugs. “I mean, you said I should find a way to activate them, but…” I probably need to trigger them first. Which will mean deep emotional… distress. Just great.

Sasuke hums, his purple eyes sparkling. “I guess it will show if you are a honorary Uchiha then, hmm?”

Kakashi snorts, and shakes his head once, quirking his eyebrow. “And you, Sasuke. How does the rinnegan feel?”

Sasuke weighs his head. “Weird. There is no strain on the nerves though, I can literally feel that already.” He pauses, and then clicks his tongue. “I have only tapped into bits of its potential though… I mean, you saw me teleport instantly in Obito’s dimensions, and I was obviously able to use Amaterasu…” He trails off, and everybody grimaces. Kakashi can see Sasuke swallow. “And we know of its abilities from Nagato and Madara. I believe I have to train them.” He shrugs. “Just as you do.”

Sakura speaks up, voice firm. “No overdoing it though, Sensei. Lest you exhaust yourself again, or burn some of the new nerves.”

Naruto shakes his head, gesticulating at Kakashi. “No, no worries, I created them so they would regenerate continuously.”

Sakura quirks an eyebrow. “Oh?” She looks at Kakashi. “Sensei, when we are back, will you let me examine your new eyes? I would love to find out how exactly Naruto’s healing jutsus work with tissue.” She grimaces, shooting Naruto a look. “I mean, it’s no secret, right?”

Naruto waves at her. “No, go ahead.” He hesitates. “As Sasuke, I probably have only mastered a small part of my new powers…” He grins suddenly. “I mean, I can levitate? How cool is that? And the healing of course. And those black spheres…” He giggles, putting a hand over his stomach. “And the bijous are all talking to each other in that place, and they are all such cool characters, I mean, Kurama is pretending to be the grumpy one, and Gyuki is sitting there grinning, and Son Goku has this deep humor somehow, and Shukaku is like, trying soooo hard not to keep asking for knowledge of Gaara, and…” He trails off, snickering. “And they’re all tethered to me now…” His eyes fill with tears. “And they all loved seeing Rikkudo Sennin again, so much.”

 

There is a small pause, as they all look at him, and there is so much love between them all suddenly, it’s stifling. 

Kakashi swallows, telling himself to talk with Naruto about Rikkudo Sennin, later.

Much later.

 

Sai speaks up, tone almost neutral. “I met Shin on the battlefield. If nothing else, then this is a good thing that… came of this.”

Kakashi sniffs, and then nods, sharing a quick look with Kushina. Meeting the ones we love, yes. “Yes. Though every life we lost is the highest price…”, he looks around the plane, at the masses of shinobi everywhere, “we could have paid a much higher one. And yes, there are benefits to the outcome, too.” He swallows, nodding, and then adds, hesitantly. “Usually… there is only losers in a war. There might be winners on the paper, but…” He shakes his head again, and then exhales, in a rush. “But I think we can mark this one as won. Tentatively.” His eyes find Naruto’s. “Despite it all.”

Naruto smiles at him, gently.

 

 

And there is this pull again, a throb, and the world drops away, again, for a moment.

Naruto’s pupils dilate.

 

 

Something deep in Kakashi trembles.

 

 

 

Sasuke’s voice draws them back, his words firm. “We need to seal her powers still. She might have lost that black thing, but she is still the enemy… something other, too. An alien, even, if you want to believe it.”

Kakashi swallows, and then tears his gaze from Naruto’s, refocusing, with an effort. “Right.” He looks at Sakura. “What about you? Did you not get new powers as well? When you absorbed the black Zetsu?”

Sakura shrugs, and then shifts, apparently somewhat embarrassedly, but Kakashi can also see the proud blush that spreads, together with the grin. “Yeah well, he was a sensory type… whatever. I can sense the army around. The distress of some. The relief.” She raises her hands, looks at her fingers. “There is also… I don’t know. An awareness that I can now manipulate matter directly. Beyond the chakra I mean.”

Kakashi frowns. “You mean like they did with the black stuff?”

Sakura nods, sharing a quick look with Naruto. “Yes, like those spheres or the black rods Madara used for fighting earlier.” She shrugs. “I have to find out, too.”

Kakashi smiles, and then shoots Sai a look. “And you, Sai, you managed to master the sealing… which I know is no small feat.”

Sai blinks up at him, and then nods, once. “And, as I said, seeing my brother has…” He trails off, frowning.

Kakashi reaches out, to pull him into a one-arm embrace, for just a moment.

He clears his throat. “So. Who can seal Kaguya’s powers?”

Naruto grimaces, sharing a quick look with Sasuke. “We only know how to seal her away… like her sons did back then, I mean.”

 

Kushina speaks up, her smirk clearly in her voice. “But Minato and I do know how to seal only parts.”

They all look at her, and she quirks an eyebrow, nodding at Naruto. “He only has half the fox’ chakra, hasn’t he.”

Naruto blinks, rapidly, looking over to Minato for a moment. “Right.” He places his hand onto his stomach again. “Kurama doesn’t know how to feel about that.”

Kushina chuckles. “Given the fact that you carry parts of the other bijous now as well, I believe it is safe to say that you will be able to wield the whole fox now… I’ll talk to Minato.” She claps her hands, shooting a look over at Kaguya. “First her though.” She grins at Kakashi. “That hair color… what do you think, Kakashi, distant relative?”

Kakashi grunts, weighing his head. “I was thinking the same thing in regards to Tobirama and…” He hesitates, and then stops the train of thought. “I was thinking the same thing earlier.” He tilts his head at Sasuke and Naruto. “Given the apparent fact that they seem to be the incarnations of Rikkudo Sennin’s sons though…” He shrugs, with a smirk. “That gene pool has come around.”

Sasuke snorts.

Naruto snickers. “It would explain the eye color of Shion, too.”

Kakashi hums. “Mhh hmmm. And the Hyuuga’s.”

Naruto blinks. “A propos Hyuuga. Where are Hinata and Neji and the others?”

Sakura points over to the side, where there’s a cluster of people. “Over there. They have healed the wounded and are now…” She hesitates, and then grins. “They’re waiting for us to be done with the big-shots.”

Kushina chuckles, sharing a quick look with Kakashi. “Ah, you have good friends then.” She reaches up to push at a strand of hair in Naruto’s forehead. “Alright, you go to your friends, and Kakashi, Minato and I will go to Kaguya. Leave her to us.”

Naruto looks down at her, his voice a bit small. “You sure?” Something unsaid hangs in the air, loud and stifling.

Kushina nods, stroking his cheek again, understanding perfectly. “I promise I won’t just disappear.”

Naruto nods, his stance relaxing somewhat. “Alright.” His eyes find Kakashi’s. “Sensei.”

 

Kakashi nods, and then extends his arm to point it at the surrounding army, carefully locking his gaze with all of them for a moment. And then he grins. “Off you go. Have some fun. Give Neji a high-five from me.”

Naruto giggles.

 

Kakashi waits until they’ve jumped away, before turning to Kushina, voice low, the grin dropping off his face. “In regards to disappearing….”

Kushina nods, with a grimace and a sigh. “I know. It could happen any moment. I think the jutsu caster is still trying to make sense of it all.” She snorts. “This must be so not what he imagined what would happen.”

Kakashi nods, pulling a face too. “Indeed.”

Kushina sighs, following Naruto to a cluster of his friends over to the side. “Still. I did not wish to weigh him down with his… if it happens I cannot do anything about it.”

Kakashi exhales, softly, and then starts, as Minato appears before him, in a flash.

Minato grins. “Sorry.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “You never did that when we were younger? I mean…” He frowns. You could have flashed to me always, after you did the tattoo… Could you have flashed to me and Rin?

Minato’s smile softens a bit, turns wry. “Back then I figured I should not point the secrets out to you.”

Kakashi swallows, looking away for a moment.

Minato watches him, seemingly reading his mind. “When you were sent to Rin, I was far away. The messenger bird found me too late. I did flash over, Kakashi. But it was too late already. And you were unconscious, her body gone and we… took you home. And put a stone, on an empty grave.”

Kakashi nods, with a sniff. And then he laughs, gently, at himself. “I only realized later, much later, that you and her really got along well.”

Minato chuckles, his black eyes kind. “She was very clever, and kind. And she worried for you two… and then for you solely.”

Kakashi exhales. Shooting a look at Obito, who is staring at them now.

He whispers. “I’m so glad he is back? I mean, he is… was the enemy for so long, has done terrible things… but I cannot hate him. He was my tether to this world, the one I spoke to, over a grave, every morning.” Kakashi sniffs, and then snorts, shooting a quick look at Minato and Kushina, who are both watching him, silently. “I mean, I stood over your graves as well, but…” He frowns. “I always felt most connected to him. I mean, now I know why, I guess, but…”

Kushina speaks up, her voice gentle. “It is a gift, that he is alive… and not just resurrected.”

Kakashi nods, the world blurry. 

 

Kushina inhales, deeply, and then smiles up at Minato, who is looking down at her now with a somewhat besotted expression. The air seems to heat up somehow. Her smile turns warm, inviting. 

The whisper teases. “Keep that thought.” 

Minato’s eyes crinkle, while he whispers. “Shame.”

Kushina chuckles, pointing at Kaguya, and totally ignoring Kakashi, who is staring, transfixed, and blushing. Her voice carries a note of apology. “We have to take care of this matter first. And, Mina-kun, Naruto is the ten-tails jinchuriki now, or, better, the one where all the bijous are connected to… you should give your half of Kurama to him.”

Minato nods, and then sighs a bit, almost dramatically. “No more chakra coat though.”

Kushina hums, stepping up to him, and he receives her in an embrace. Her voice is low. “You know I prefer you without anything on anyways.”

Kakashi clears his throat, loudly. While feeling as red as a tomato.

Kushina giggles, and then shoots him a sly look. “Naruto didn’t drop out of thin air, you know.”

Kakashi snorts, helplessly, tone dry, trying to ignore Minato’s gaze, that seems… hot somehow. “You know, Sora said the same thing.”

Kushina squeals. “Sora-san! Where is she? Oh my god, is she here?”

Kakashi holds up a hand, and then shakes his head. “No, she isn’t. While we invited most ninjas into the army we did need for some capable ones to protect the children, too… we sent the ones old enough to fare for themselves under supervision to her and a few others.”

Minato blinks, tone vaguely off. “You spared them. That’s good.”

Kakashi nods, with a sigh. “A lot has changed.” He swallows, his throat clicking. “Thankfully.”

Kushina sighs, and then shrugs, reaching up to thread her fingers through Minato’s hair for a moment. “Come, let us go to her.”

Minato nods and releases her, and Kakashi falls into step behind them, feeling vaguely out of body. 

 

There is thrum in his body, pointing in the general direction where Naruto is.

 

 

 

And he is aware that Kushina hasn’t addressed that yet, though he is sure she has caught on.

 

 

 

He blinks, looking up and over at the dirty blonde boy amidst his friends, aligning the visual with the sensation, blinking rapidly when Naruto looks up for a moment, catching his gaze. 

Kakashi tears his gaze away, his heart beating in his throat.

 

Minato’s voice is soft, but also cutting deep. “I was afraid it would engage when he was turning adult…”

Kakashi clears his throat, with a bit of a grimace. “Yeah, well, I mean, he is still so young, it’s still so difficult, but…” He trails off, reaching for the truth. “I’m glad it did now. That it happened I mean. I just…” He shakes his head, glad they keep on walking, albeit slowly. “At least I don’t have to hide anything from him anymore.”

He swallows. 

Kushina speaks up, tone careful. “Fate is funny sometimes, is it not? I mean, we are here, now, too… to give you our blessing.”

Kakashi’s head snaps up, eyes wide on hers.

Her eyes crinkle, tone vaguely amused. “What, Kaka-kun, do you really think I would hate fate for choosing you? The one I chose as well? The one Minato chose, instinctively, too?”

 

Pain, pain, pure and sheer and beautiful.

 

Kakashi snorts, while blinking, rapidly, clutching at the threads of his composure. 

No. But I feared. I… feared. And now… 

 

He clears his throat. “Well, the sense of humor fate possesses is unmatched.”

Kushina tilts her head, shooting him a look from the corner of her eye. 

Her tone is gentle. Cutting deep. “Sasuke is good for him though.”

Kakashi grimaces, but nods, breathing through the instant, instinctual pain. “He is. And Naruto has always chased after him, ever since they were preschoolers still. When they met the first time.” His voice drops to a whisper. “It was bound to happen.”

 

Minato exhales, stopping close to Kaguya, who is watching them approach calmly, but reservedly, with Tobirama off to the side gazing on silently. 

Minato clicks his tongue, speaking more to himself. “Still, I would love to be able to be there when you two finally allow the bond.” He blinks, and then smiles down at Kushina, lifting a hand to ghost his hand over the side of her face.  “I know how it is… and I want that for him.” He turns his head to look at Kakashi. “For you both, Kakashi.”

 

For a long moment, Kakashi cannot breathe, the feeling too much. 

 

Simply too much. 

 

 

 

There is a pause, and then Kaguya speaks up, carefully somehow, though her voice still rings as a bell. “There is power in me still… maybe I could… help. As a sign of goodwill.”

Tobirama twitches, but he stays silent, his dark eyes glowering at her.

She smiles softly, her pale eyes finding his. “So much rage in you. Maybe that pink-haired woman should draw it out as well.”

Tobirama snorts, crossing his arms. His tone is acerbic. “And why should I not feel that way. I lived in pain and death, and I came back into a war, too. And now not even my grandchild…” He breaks off.

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, feeling the pain with him, deeply.

The words come by themselves. “He was a grand man, a great ninja. Irreverent, powerful… loyal.” Kakashi smiles softly. “Always good for a surprise.” His voice drops to a whisper. “Always there for me.”

Tobirama stares at him, for a long moment, and then something in his posture relaxes, with a sniff. He nods at Kakashi, eyes flitting up to Kakashi’s dirty hair. “You’re of the Hatake clan, are you not?”

Kakashi blinks, taken aback. “I… yes. Why do you ask?”

Tobirama smirks. “My wife was a Hatake, too. Of the side clan.” The expression grows vaguely warmer, proud. “Though not a big clan, your lineage always produced extraordinary ninjas.” He snorts. “Though I could have done without the summons. The hairs get everywhere.”

Kakashi snorts, too, feeling warmer somehow. And a bit of a cringe, down his spine. Are we related? Somehow?? “Yeah, well… A pack of dogs is not everybody’s.”

Tobirama nods, and then sighs, tone hard again, as he addresses Kaguya. “So. How do you propose you could… help?”

Kaguya tilts her head, her long hair flowing, like silk. 

She spreads her hands with the red nails glinting, just a bit. “The reanimation jutsu used… it is your jutsu, is it not?”

Tobirama blinks, while Kakashi frowns. “It is.” Tobirama narrows his eyes. “How do you know?”

Kaguya shrugs, elegantly. “I am not of this world. I sense the strings of fate and power differently than you do. I sense origins and destinations, and… pulls.”

Kakashi exhales, softly, catching on. “That is why you abandoned your path back then so… easily, isn’t it. You saw that your relationship was fated.” He quirks an eyebrow. “And that is why you adhere to our wishes now, too… you sense the connections.”

Kaguya smiles at him, gently. “I sense the path, yes. As it is now at least. The paths are ever changing, influenced by our actions.” She blinks up at the destroyed tree for a moment. “I see what is to come, here, now.” She frowns, the line of the now closed third eye wrinkling. “You know they will come here, eventually. That event is a given, on all paths.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, trying to understand. “And us sealing away your powers won’t make any difference?”

Kaguya smiles, a bit bitterly. “Without the fruit my powers are no match for whoever of them will come. They had millennia to harvest other worlds… They will have surpassed me, by leagues. So giving you knowledge is actually more important, should you wish to continue to…” She hesitates, and then locks her lilac gaze with Kakashi’s, directly. “Live.”

Kakashi shivers.

Tobirama speaks up, tone hard, looking at her but tilting his head at Kakashi. “And you’re negotiating with him? Who is he to you?”

Kaguya smiles, for a moment. “The one where the threads connect.”

Kakashi stares at her, trying to ignore the weight of the gazes of the others.

 

Tobirama harrumphs, and then sighs, with a shake of his head. “Fine. So. Back to my jutsu. How do you propose you could help me?” He points at the general direction of Minato and Kushina. “Or us.”

Kaguya blinks at him, and then shrugs again, once. “I could use my remaining energy to perfect Edo Tensei… Or at least as much as I can.” She looks at Minato, and then at Kushina. “They can then seal what is left of my energy… that which you call chakra away. I need only to live, I can draw on the chakra around me constantly… I do not need to possess it to exist.”

 

There is a pause, as her words sink in.

Kushina speaks up, eventually, a shiver to her tone. “What do you mean… perfect it?”

Kaguya turns to her, gaze gentle. “You are a mother, too. You wish to be with your child, do you not? Even for a little while? I… am able to change this reanimated body into the one you were used to… for a while. It is cell camouflage only, not the full reanimation, but I could give you time on this plane of existence.”

Minato’s voice is raw. “Time? How… much?”

Kakashi stares at him, unable to think.

Kaguya weighs her head. “2… to 3 of your years, maybe. If I split my power through the ones that carry reanimated bodies and are in the vicinity. Unfortunately, you need to be close to me for my energy to transform your cells. It depends on how many wish to receive this camouflage.”

Tobirama’s tone is hard. “Drawbacks?”

Kaguya turns to look at him. “You are still dead, so your body won’t have the same physical needs. You can smell, and you can taste, and you can feel… but your appetites are subdued, you do not need them, per se.”

Kushina swallows, her voice shivering. “What happens when the energy runs out?”

Kaguya looks at her. “The cell camouflage will fail… your body will become this reanimated one once more. If the jutsu caster has released the jutsu, which is likely, then you will fade away.”

Kakashi exhales a shuddering breath, looking up to stare at Minato. Sensei.

The words leave his mouth, without consulting his brain first. “I really would love to see both yours and Kushina’s real eyes again.”

Minato blinks at him.

Tobirama snorts.

 

Obito speaks up, obviously having come up behind them, silently. “So would I.” He shivers. “Please.”

Minato sniffs, and then shares a small smile with Kushina, who is smiling back, wobbly. 

She leans into him, whispering. “Imagine we could go and sit down to dinner with Naruto… be a family, even for a little while.”

Kakashi gasps, silently, hurting viciously.

He can see Minato swallow.

 

Minato nods at the place a ways off where Hashirama is kneeling over Madara. “We need to talk to them, too.” He looks up at Kaguya. “Come with us, please?”

He steps back a bit, and takes Kushina’s hand, walking over to Hashirama with her, and Kakashi stares after him, his feet feeling rooted to the spot.

Obito whispers behind him. Brokenly. “God, I know how you feel.”

Kakashi shivers. 

Kaguya tilts her head, one hand coming up to cup Obito’s wrinkled face. “So much of my essence in you, child. So much pain and longing, too.”

Obito swallows, compulsively.

Tobirama steps back, extending his arm, his gruff voice gentle somehow. “Come, we need to follow them.”

Kaguya inclines her head, seeming to float past them, her movements fluid somehow.

Tobirama shoots a look at Kakashi and Obito and then follows her, silently.

 

Obito’s voice is brittle. “They’re going to accept, aren’t they?”

Kakashi shrugs, feeling like crying. “I guess.”

Obito sniffs. “Our Sensei. Alive again.”

Kakashi cackles. “Or as alive as possible.”

Obito exhales, shudderingly. “Will you… will you allow Madara to be revived, as well?”

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long moment. Now that is the question, isn’t it. He shakes his head once. “I don’t know.” He turns his head, to look at Obito, tone as exhausted as he feels, and yet filled to the brim with hope. “Come. Let’s go over?”

Obito nods.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Walking over is weird, the whole area doused in anticipation somehow. 

 

 

 

Kakashi looks up, looks around, at the masses of people waiting. 

At the little cluster of people hovering around the still prone Madara.

 

 

 

Obito fidgets, and sniffs. 

Kakashi frowns. “Are you nervous? Didn’t you stand next to him already?” Did you not stay with him for a long time back then?

Obito chuckles, drily, tone low. “Yeah, but that is when I was trying to… dream. Before you punched the seal out.” He swallows. “Before I remembered.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Remembered?”

Obito blushes, deeply, the color on one cheek offset almost beautifully by the white flesh of the wrinkled side. “Something, yes.”

 

“Hmmm.” Kakashi looks at him, vaguely amused, seeing the blush deepen. 

A raspy and deep voice interrupts his thoughts, Hashirama shifting a bit to allow Madara to see them. “Obito.”

Obito exhales, shudderingly, stepping up to Madara. “Madara.” He hesitates, and then shrugs, tone vaguely apologetic. “Things turned out differently.”

Madara chuckles, and then his gaze darkens, his tone a harsh whisper. “You left me alone.”

Obito’s face crumbles, in abject pain. His voice is a whisper, too. “I know. I’m sorry.”

Madara snarls at him. “I hated you for it.”

Kakashi stares at him, voice low. “Is that why you changed the plan?”

Madara’s purple eyes snap to his. “I was alone. Rejected.” He grimaces. “I still am alone.”

Hashirama speaks up, tone gentle. “No. Not anymore.” From the corner of his eyes, Kakashi can see Tobirama roll his eyes.

Madara blinks up at Hashirama, silently.

Kakashi stares at the double profile of the Hashirama kneeling before Madara… and the one embedded in Madara’s flesh. 

And he understands suddenly, the words a whisper, loud somehow between them. “There’s love outside bonds.”

 

Obito sniffs, shivering next to him.

He drops to his knees next to Hashirama, addressing Madara, tone raw. “I forgive you. Please forgive me.”

Kakashi can see Hashirama squeeze Madara’s hand. 

 

Kaguya blinks, interjecting, eyes faraway for a moment. “You need to decide, now. The jutsu caster is preparing to release.”

Kakashi’s gaze snaps to her. 

 

Hashirama speaks up, tone very gentle. “Let us release, Madara. Let us go to the beyond together. I wonder… if the light of hope and love can gentle your raging heart.”

Kakashi shivers, seeing Madara’s eyes fill with tears. 

His voice is a whisper, the dark eyes locked to Hashirama’s. “No new life for us?”

And Hashirama bends down, to kiss him, whispering on his lips. “No. Eternity, though.”

Madara sobs, and then nods, once, while his hand comes up, shakingly, threading through Hashirama’s hair in a gesture that seems practiced, known. 

His gaze flits to Minato, for a moment, his finger forming the concentration sign within the threads of ebony. “Release.”

Obito’s hands fly up, to cover his mouth, his eyes wide. Minato blinks, confused. 

And then blushes, deeply.

Madara’s eyes crinkle, a smile that is beautiful crossing his face. His eyes find Hashirama’s, voice breaking on the words. “It’s forgiven now… Now we can go.”

Hashirama smirks, cupping Madara’s hand in his own hair, looking up to shoot a look at Tobirama for a moment. “Brother?”

Tobirama grunts, tone dry. “Don’t you want to meet Tsunade again? Or anybody else?”

Hashirama sighs, while the first flakes of his body start to float away. He squeezes Madara’s hand. “We are the beginning. They are the future. Let them shape it.” He grins, a boyish grin full of mischief. “Besides. I will wait for her.” He bends down, to Madara, whispering against his lips once more. “Will you wait with me?”

And Madara sighs, his skin cracking. “Always.”

 

His eyes close.

 

 

 

Kakashi exhales, shudderingly.

 

 

Tobirama grunts, watching them float away, little flakes of ash and tissue, blown away in the soft breeze, and then he groans, turning to Kakashi. “Oh, well, somebody has to keep an eye out for these two idiots.” He nods at Kakashi. “It would please me if you could continue your clan… if something of my beautiful wife Kasumi would pass on.”

Kakashi opens his mouth, and then closes it again, not sure what to say. 

Obito speaks up in his stead. “I’ll make sure of it.”

Kakashi turns, to stare at him. Pointedly. 

Obito shrugs, something stubborn in his gaze.

Tobirama snorts, and then nods, his skin starting to crack, too. “Very well.”

 

They all watch him float away, bit by bit, shivering a bit, when he’s gone, too.

 

Obito swallows. “Only you two left… and him.”

Kakashi blinks. Right. He frowns. “Where is he?”

Minato looks at him, tone calm. Hard. “You know?”

Kakashi nods. “Oh, I know.” He looks at Obito. “But you, Sensei, you only know parts of what happened.” Of what he let happen.

Kushina interjects, tone hard. “He should be happy he can release to the beyond, with what we know of already.”

Kakashi snorts, bitterly.

 

A salacious voice pipes up, suddenly, behind them. “Indeed.”

Kakashi grimaces, and then turns, slightly, to see Orochimaru stand there, posture deliberately relaxed.

Sarutobi Hiruzen is standing behind him, silently. 

Orochimaru quirks an eyebrow, the slitted eyes sparkling. “Isn’t it funny that we should be able to talk, now…”

Kakashi swallows, asking carefully. “Where is the Godaime?”

Orochimaru sighs, a bit put on. “Oh she’s busy trying to stabilize the Green Beast’s foot…”

Kakashi’s heart beats hard, once. Guy. He blinks, sending a little prayer to Tsunade. Thank you.

 

There is a loud crack in the air, as Kushina cracks her knuckles. 

Kakashi can see Hiruzen blanch.

 

Obito speaks up, tone faraway. “And here we are, after all that is said and done…” 

Orochimaru chuckles. “If I had only known back then that it was you…” He smirks, and then clicks his tongue. “I could have just asked you for the eyes…”

Kakashi frowns, tickled wrongly by the tone.

Obito’s tone is hard. “Still experimenting and growing them I see.”

Kakashi blinks, shooting him a flabbergasted look, before turning back to Orochimaru, tone hard. “You really still grow sharingans?” 

Orochimaru shrugs, his long tongue coming out to lick his lips, tone grating. “Who do you think gave Danzo the ones he wore? And why do you think I needed Sasuke’s blood?”

Kakashi frowns, shooting a look at Obito. Danzo wore sharingans?

He opens his mouth to ask, but Kushina is faster, her tone hard. “We can talk about that later. Hiruzen, I’d like to talk to you about the way you ignored my wishes.”

She steps forward, and Hiruzen takes one back, instinctively.

Kakashi smiles, grimly.

Orochimaru speaks up again, with a chuckle. “Ah, I am sorry. He is currently unable to respond. I took his tongue.” He holds up the muscle, wriggling it a bit. Kakashi pulls a face. 

Orochimaru sighs, deeply. “Of course it will regenerate, but I did not wish to hear his voice again.”

Minato speaks up, calmly but firmly. “I understand.” He reaches out, puts his hand on Kushina’s shoulder, who is almost vibrating with anger in front of him. “Let us talk with him in the afterlife.” He smiles, gently, but there is a note of something dangerous in it, something cold, that makes the shivers run down Kakashi’s spine, and that reminds him very succinctly that Minato was also the one who went and killed battalions… in one single attack.

Minato’s blue eyes glitter, and there is anger in his voice, clearly heard. “Later.”

Kushina looks up at him, for a long moment. The moment she looks back at Hiruzen, Sarutobi Hiruzen releases. 

Voluntarily.

 

Kakashi almost laughs, a dark pit of hate reaching for the fading figure.

 

Obito smirks, darkly. “I mean, he does know he cannot run from you, right.”

Kakashi grunts, unable to put anything he feels into words.

Kushina exhales, through her nose. “Yeah, well, he will know.”

 

Orochimaru’s tongue flicks out, silently, watching the tongue he holds turn to ash.

 

Minato blinks, and then turns to Kaguya, who had been watching silently. 

His tone is soft once more, controlled. “Is there still time?”

Kaguya tilts her head, and then nods, once. “Barely, but yes.”

Kushina sniffs, reaching for Minato’s hand. Her voice is brittle. “How much time will we get?”

Kaguya blinks, her hands coming up to form an intricate seal. “5 to 7 of your years.”

Kakashi gasps, the world blurring.

Besides him, Obito sniffs. 

Kushina’s smile is wide, and brilliant. “From one mother to another… please.”

Kaguya blinks at her, and then her face softens, and there is the hint of a smile on her face. Her gaze flickers to where Naruto and Sasuke are at, and then back to Kushina and Minato. 

 

Her eyes close.

 

 

And then there is a pulse, a pulse that tickles.

 

 

 

Kakashi can feel Naruto’s attention snap to them, burning somehow, but he ignores it, eyes transfixed on the couple before him. 

 

The moment the blue returns to Minato’s eyes his own tears fall, unheeded.

 

Obito steps up, embracing him from behind, pressing Kakashi to himself. Kakashi’s hands come up, to hold onto the arm over his chest, for dear life.

Kushina sniffs, and then laughs, reaching up to place her palms on Minato’s face.

 

 

 

 

The image of Minato bending down to kiss her, deeply, bleeding devotion, burns itself into Kakashi’s brain.

 

 

 

 

Obito’s lips press onto the skin behind Kakashi’s right ear. Trembling.

 

 

 

 

 

And something within Kakashi… shifts back into place.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

After Kakashi’s speech in chapter 35 of Sakura being strong enough in her own right, I know it may seem weird that she gets a power up here, too. 

BUT there is a subtle, but important difference to it (imho^^), that I’d like to point out: she got this through her own skills. Used her own skills. 

Both Naruto and Sasuke were gifted their power ups during the war by heritage (so to speak - I did give them a bit more agency here as well by making the extraction of the bijou chakra and the wearing of the rinnegan their ideas/acknowledgments, but that just as a side note).  

I felt it was important to have them both acknowledge Sakura’s skills and give her the means to shape their future by extracting the power that was corrupting them (all)… and bending that to her will. Because she -is- strong (and it was within her skillset and I never understood why they so underused that, tsk^^)

 

AND: ran across this little comic re Obito's dimension today. Haven't stopped laughing since, because yes. (The flying tea sends me for some reason^^^^^)

Chapter 41: Bleeding heart

Notes:

Shifted Naruto’s birthday a bit because we didn’t need the big goodbye… and I felt he deserved more than he got there in canon. (Especially hugging-wise, I HATED that they removed Minato’s arms in canon so he couldn’t even HUG Naruto there… grrr^^.).

And: Shokupan seem to be milk bread rolls, often with Hokkaido.
Also - the callback quote to chapter 10 finally happened :) Wohoo :)))))

EDIT (Sept. 4th, 2022): Fan art added by the incredible Anannua, who really, really, captured that kiss :)))

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

Naruto’s voice is heated, shivering with elation and… what is that? Kakashi blinks, trying to concentrate on the words, while trying not to start crying compulsively.

“Mom? Dad? Sensei? What is happening?”

 

Kushina turns to him, with a broad, wobbly smile, her dark purple-blue eyes sparkling. “Surprise?”

Naruto hovers in front of her, obviously confused, and shivering. “What?”

Minato reaches out, stepping to stand directly behind Kushina’s shoulder, fingers ghosting over Naruto’s whiskers. His voice is scratchy. “I hope you don’t mind it if we stay in this realm for a while longer.”

Naruto’s voice is toneless. “What?”

 

Kakashi blinks, shivering. Obito’s breath is rapid little puffs, against his skin.

Sasuke steps forward, slowly, his purple eyes trained on Minato and Kushina, who are both smiling at Naruto, carefully moving forward to envelop Naruto in a hug now. 

Sasuke’s voice carries awe. “Your cells have… resurged.” He blinks, frowning. Staring. “Revived.”

Naruto turns to look at him, while nestling into their embrace. Whispering. “What?”

Kaguya speaks up, her weirdly ringing voice drawing their attention, easily. “It is done, indeed. The very core of my being has been depleted to camouflage their cells with living matter…” She looks back at the remnant of the tree, and white tissue, dropping from it. “It is over.” 

 

Kakashi blinks, turning his head to look at Obito, who is drawing back just a bit, to let him. “Are you…” 

Kaguya interjects, while Obito’s dark eyes fill with tears. “His cells too, have been recharged. While the white Zetsus will fade now, to be reabsorbed by your world, I believe he will remain stable.”

Obito sniffs, voice brittle. “Why?” He swallows. “Why did you spare me?”

Kaguya stares at him, and then glides over, her hand hovering over his wrinkled face once more. The lilac eyes soften somehow, the red lips twisting into a small, gentle and vaguely sad smile. “You are bonded… you have not recognized who to yet. But I can see it… and you carry so much of my essence. I feel your soul.” She hesitates, and then smiles, broadly, sharp little teeth showing for a moment. “I remember how it was… I wish to feel it again, even if only through an echo.”

Obito sobs, and then shakes his head, a bit wildly. “I thought she was dead…”

Kaguya hums, her hand dropping away as she floats back a bit. “He is alive… but he isn’t here.”

Kakashi shivers. Huh.

 

Obito’s voice is a whisper, laced through and through with pain. “He?”

Kakashi looks at him, smiling a wobbly smile. Almost brutally relieved, and yet unable to think. He forces the words out. “See?” He swallows. “Oh Obito, imagine…” He trails off, unable to finish the sentence.

Obito stares at him, unseeing.

 

It’s Naruto’s voice that makes Kakashi turn back round, the words that drip with feeling. “Sensei,  remember… I mean, you didn’t get to dream, right? But now… your dream came true?”

Kakashi shakes his head, once, not able to follow, feeling ripped open, raw. Spit out. “My… dream?”

Naruto sniffs, and then withdraws from both Kushina’s and Minato’s embrace, gently, carefully, squeezing them before turning to Kakashi. 

He nods, a bit wildly. “Yes, remember when we talked about the dream you had? After…” He swallows, a small grimace passing over his face. “After the prison?”

Kakashi blinks, and then inhales, shudderingly, the memory in sudden, stark focus. He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “I remember.”

Obito speaks up, behind him, his voice just as brittle as Kakashi feels. “And what is… was your dream, Kakashi?”

Kakashi shivers, and then looks at him, and then over at Kushina and Minato, who both watch him, silently. 

 

He swallows, words a whisper. “Everybody lives.” He exhales, in a rush. “I mean, it’s not everybody, and I know it’s not fair to those who died and were not here, or sealed somewhere else, but it’s…“

He falls silent, unable to go on, feeling guilty, but then again not, because it’s them and Naruto deserves it so much, and…

 

Naruto looks at him, and then gently smiles, teeth flashing, while a tear drops.

Understanding all too well. 

He whispers, too. “I know. But… for once, this is a dream that is for me, too, Sensei… and”, his face falls, though his smile stays, “I love it.”

 

 

And Kakashi’s heart bleeds for those that won’t get this blessing… but his world is reduced to blue, searing blue, beaming at him, with desperate happiness. 

 

 

 

For a moment, he remembers Iruka, hears his voice in his mind, reminding him of his responsibility to Naruto… sternly. 

 

 

 

And he decides to let that guilt go. 

With a sigh.  

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Morning comes, with too many impressions to properly to retain.

 

Kakashi remembers Minato and Kushina putting an intricate seal onto Kaguya… and Kaguya’s feet touching the ground, properly, with her full weight, for the first time in millenia.

 

Peeling laughter had trickled from Kaguya’s mouth.

 

Neji’s and Hinata’s large lilac eyes, that had watched, seeing too much, and which had then directed his gaze back to the rows of people behind them… and Hiashi, who had inclined his head, in greeting. Who had deferred, to them all. Easily, obviously content.

 

Sakura’s wobbly smile, and Tsunade’s exhausted but happy and yet sad expression, and the hug she had given him.

 

Tenzou, there suddenly, looking pale and frail somehow, but relieved. They had just squeezed each other for a split second, and then had postponed any discussion, in unspoken agreement.

 

Gaara, floating on a cloud of sand, with Onoki floating nearby, conversing and laughing. Dirty but alive.

 

Ay, who had tried to make his rapping chosen brother shut up, to the surrounding people’s unending amusement. 

 

Mei, flirting with an exuberant Guy. 

Honestly, that had thrown Kakashi for a loop. A good one.

 

Tenten, sulking about some kind of fan she wanted to get back, with Hinata trying to console her.

 

Shikamaru, who had offered a cigarette to Temari. To her rolling her eyes and declining, but watching with a little smile, when he lit his own.

 

Choji, who had offered chips to one of the Lightning’s kunoichis, to his father’s booming laughter.

 

Obito, who had sat down next to Sasuke at some point, for a while, silently. Fidgeting. 

 

Sasuke who had glowered, and whose jaw had worked… but who had not drawn his sword.

 

 

 

 

 

Naruto introducing his parents to literally everyone. 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi inhales deeply now, exhausted and yet wide awake in the rising sun, figuring that must be a good start, all things considered.

 

 

 

 

He looks over at Kushina, who is standing next to Sakura now, talking with her. He watches her gesticulate for a moment, and then walks over to them, listening only, not interjecting.

“… and it’s like a pull, you know, and then the chakra reforms somehow into the chains, and I can feel whatever I chain with them.“

Sakura nods. "The chains are made from your cells and chakra, feeding the sensations back.“

Kushina nods. "Yes. Supposedly only the Uzumaki were able to do this because of our strong life force… thinking about it, it makes sense. The chains probably take quite a lot of cells to mutate every time they’re deployed. Though I have never measured it.“

Sakura hums. “Something similar has to happen when Naruto uses his healing powers, too…”

Kushina quirks an eyebrow. “Or when Madara and Naruto created and used these black spheres and rods. And it’s very close to what you do when you draw out poison, too. You should be able to adapt it to the new abilities you absorbed, without too much of an effort?”

Sakura grimaces, a bit. “Ah yes, but I think I will need a long time to uncover all those abilities.” 

Kakashi interjects, gently. “So do they, no worries.”

Sakura’s eyes snap to his, with a small smile. “Sensei.”

He nods at her, before looking at Kushina for a moment, his heart giving a painful thud. “Looks like you caught up to them through your own design…” He looks at her, lets his sincerity shine through. “I’m proud of you.”

Sakura beams at him, but blushes, too, with a shrug. “Both Naruto and Sasuke seemed to know what I had to do though, so…”

Kushina snorts. “That only means that they could not do it?” She elbows Sakura into the side, just a bit. “Don’t sell yourself short?” She narrows her eyes, shooting Kakashi a look. “Does she always sell herself short?”

Sakura colors, deeply, while stammering a bit, and Kakashi sighs, with a shrug. “Role models have been woefully short…”

Kushina stares at him for a moment, and then frowns, looking back at Sakura. “I see.” She tilts her head. “Were there not kunoichis from the Uchiha clan at least? I know that there were always formidable ninjas in their lines. Or the Inuzuka clan? Or…”

Kakashi grimaces, a bit. “The Inuzuka clan decided to keep to themselves, mostly, after the war took a lot of their men. And the Uchiha…” He clicks his tongue, shooting a look over at Sasuke and Obito, who are now standing a few dozen meters away, with Minato and Naruto. “The Uchiha were pushed to the fringes under the Sandaime’s rule. They were the police, but they were not even used in the battle the night… Naruto was born. As a result, the clan fully locked down in on itself.”

Kushina exhales, through her nose, letting her gaze glide over the amassed but currently resting army. Over the people playing card games, and laughing. “I see.” She clicks her tongue. “Still. I do see quite a lot of kunoichis… times are changing once more.”

Kakashi smirks softly, and then raises his eyes to Sakura. “I hope.”

Sakura nods, once.

 

Kakashi exhales, too, and then points over to Minato and the others, turning towards them. “We should discuss what happens now… or better how.”

Kushina hums, falling into step with him, Sakura following them quietly. Over on the side, Kakashi can see Tsunade come towards them, with Tenzou, and Sai. 

Kakashi smiles to himself, broadly. Thank you for saving him, Tsunade. I will be forever in your debt.

Kushina follows his gaze. “Friend of yours?”

Kakashi nods. “Good friend, yes.” He swallows. “Old friend, too.” He snorts. “And next to him the current Hokage, of course.”

Kushina blinks. “The blonde girl?”

Kakashi waggles his eyebrows, vaguely amused. “That is Senju Tsunade, the Shodai’s granddaughter. She masks her appearance.”

“Ahhhhhh.” Kushina grins. “I was wondering how her knowing Hashirama would fit…”

Kakashi hums, pointing at Sakura’s Hundred’s seal. “The Godaime perfected the seal Sakura wears, too. Though I firmly believe that Sakura will surpass her, eventually.”

Kushina grins, and then sighs deliberately, with a smirk. “They always do.”

Kakashi looks at her, remembering who she trained. “Kurenai stayed home with her small daughter…”

Kushina smirks at him, while they arrive next to Minato and the others, with Minato pulling her into a half-embrace, immediately. She smiles up at him, and then turns her attention back at Kakashi, smiling brilliantly. “Ohhh, I have to visit her. What about Asuma, and Choza?”

Kakashi swallows, and then exhales, in a rush. “Choza should be here, somewhere… Asuma…” He clicks his tongue, a shiver of pain running through him. “Asuma was probably too far away to be revived.”

Kushina’s face falls, with a blink. “Oh.”

 

Kakashi nods, with a sniff, and then lets it go with an effort and addresses Minato and Obito, raising his eyebrows. “So. What now?”

Minato quirks an eyebrow, his voice gentle, but anticipation shivering in it. “We should probably go home.”

Tsunade speaks up, arriving at their little group. “I agree. The alliance has rested enough to be able to make the trips to the respective villages without lingering exhaustion. Though…” She smirks for a moment. “Though the enemy is no more…” Her eyes find Obito’s for a long moment, and he twitches under her gaze. “I have to say it turned out very differently to what I anticipated.”

Kushina nods. “That it did.” She inclines her head, in a little bow. “Godaime, it is a pleasure to meet you.”

Tsunade blinks, and then returns the little bow, the corner of her eyes crinkling. “And you, Uzumaki Kushina. I am… extremely excited to meet you and your… husband.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, irked by the little pause.

He and Naruto share a quick look. 

Tsunade turns to Minato, offering another small bow and a smile. “Yondaime. The stone head does not do you justice.”

Minato chuckles, while bowing to her. “Do they ever.” He straightens back up, his expression sobering a bit, his voice serious. “I would like to request… asylum for my wife and myself, Godaime. And for… Obito.”

Tsunade tilts her head. “But you are no refugee… you are always welcome in Konoha. It is your home after all.”

Minato hums. “Still. I… we are literal outsiders, to this world even, seeking to live with you once more. For a while. If you would have us.”

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow, tone dry. “Well, I can offer you to return to Konoha with us… it’s still rebuilding, so I cannot offer you your old house. We might be able to rebuild it for you though.”

Kushina smiles at her, her eyes flashing. “Oh, I’d love that.” She quirks an eyebrow. "Why was Konoha destroyed?“

Tsunade nods, and sighs. “Long story. Very well. So be it.” She looks up, and over at Obito, leveling him with a long look. “And you, Uchiha Obito… you with your history so deeply entwined with Konoha’s… do you also request asylum, as the Yondaime asked in your stead?”

Obito fidgets, and then grimaces, looking away. “Could you even grant it? I mean, let me…” He pauses, his eyes filling with tears.

Kakashi continues for him, his own voice shivering as well. “Could we let you come home? Without punishing you?” Without killing you?

Minato speaks up again, tone firm. “Godaime, if I may… I once told Obito, that if he wanted to come back…”

Kushina blinks up at him, and Kakashi frowns.

Tsunade looks at him, with a frown of her own. “You met him, after…” She trails off.

Minato blushes the tiniest bit, and nods. “I did. I… forgot about it, but the memory was released, and now…” He trails off, clearing his throat.

Kakashi blinks, unable to think, his mind filled with too many questions suddenly.

 

Kushina stares up at him, and then quirks an eyebrow, the corners of her mouth twitching. 

Obito’s voice is almost inaudible, but it is clear he is addressing her. “May I?”

 

All eyes snap to Obito. 

 

Obito shifts under their gazes, obviously uncomfortable.

There’s a sly little smile, that spreads over Kushina’s face. 

Her tone is saturated with… what? Kakashi cannot place it. “Sure.”

 

Obito clears his throat, and then steps up to Minato, sending an apologetic little look at Naruto, who is stepping back, narrowing his eyes.

Minato turns to Obito, with a blink, his mouth opening, but…

 

 

Obito reaches out, pulls him in, and kisses him, deeply.

 

 

Kushina chuckles.

 

Kakashi… stares.

 

 

He is not sure, but he is vaguely aware that his mind has flatlined.

 

There’s an impression of a fantasy that’s always been out of reach, out of possibility and definitely not allowed that… He grunts, pushing it away, with a shiver, seeing Obito tilt his head, deepen the kiss. Minato’s eyes flutter shut, with a small sigh.

 

Out of the corner of his eyes he can see Naruto blush, deeply, with an open mouth. 

Sasuke’s purple eyes glitter in the sun. 

Kushina is biting her lips. Watching, rather unabashedly.

 

Obito withdraws just slightly, nipping along Minato’s lips, and then withdrawing with a sniff, as Minato reopens his eyes. 

Kakashi shivers, seeing they’re almost black. 

 

He wonders for a split second what the hell brought this on… and then that thought flees, never to return, as Obito turns and steps over, to him, one hand coming up to thread into Kakashi’s hair, while his other pulls down Kakashi’s mask.

 

 

A part of Kakashi wonders where all his reflexes and speed are gone to, because he sure as hell doesn’t seem to be able to move.

 

 

Obito’s lips are warm and cool and smooth… and they are wet.

 

Kakashi’s eyes flutter shut, as lust slams through him, the sudden intensity of it flaying.

 

Obito touches his tongue to his and Kakashi rears back, just a bit, hands coming up to push Obito back, while holding onto him, their lips separating the tiniest bit.

Breath mixes, heady and fast.

 

 

Kakashi stares at Obito, from short distance.

Minato clears his throat, quietly.

 

 

Three feet over, Naruto exclaims, loudly. Indignantly. “The fuck?”

Kakashi’s eyes crawl over and find his, for a long moment, the sensation of Obito’s lips so near still driving him insane. 

Naruto glowers at him.

Sasuke blinks, turning his head to look at him.

 

Kushina snickers. 

And then she speaks up, tone dripping with amusement. “And now Kakashi should probably kiss Minato to get it out of his system…”

Minato blushes, spectacularly. Obviously trying to deflect. “Maybe he should have his first kiss with Naruto though, don’t you think?”

And… it’s time for Kakashi to blush, even more deeply. 

Out of the corner of his eyes he can see Naruto do so, too. While Sasuke crosses his arms. 

 

Obito chuckles, pressing a quick kiss to his lips, before stepping back, dislodging Kakashi’s hands. He exhales, tone salacious. “Yeah, that is definitely time.”

 

Naruto pipes up, brave as fuck, as usual. Answering defiantly. “Oh, well, we already had that.”

 

Silence once more, as Sasuke narrows his eyes, and everybody stares. Again.

You could hear a pin drop.

 

Sai speaks up, tone light and sharp somehow. “Ohhhh, uncomfortab…” The sentence ends in an ‘oof’, as Sakura elbows him into the side. Harshly.

 

Kakashi swallows, trying to look everywhere but at Minato. Or Tsunade. Or Tenzou.

Or Naruto.

 

Or Sasuke.

 

Or all the ninjas around pretending not to watch.

 

 

Dammit.

 

 

 

He swallows his embarrassment down, with an effort, licking his lips.

Tasting Obito, still. And something else. Someone else. Shivers, wishing for a hole in the ground to swallow him up, please. Now.

Pulls his mask back up instead, with shaking fingers.

 

 

Kushina chuckles softly, and then steps over, hugging him.

He sniffs and hugs back, glad for the unspoken support.

 

 

 

Tsunade speaks up eventually, tone dripping with amusement, too. “Well, well, I mean, I have been thinking about how to handle all of… this, but how could I possibly break up these… ties…” She nods at Obito. “We will still need to… talk though, later.” She shoots a look at Kakashi, humor and fatalism coloring her voice. “But given the fact that you are so important to the upcoming Hokage…”

Minato quirks an eyebrow, while Kakashi sighs, withdrawing from Kushina’s embrace, slowly. “Oh?”

Tsunade looks at Minato. “Well, as I have told Kakashi before, there is something I need to… find, when this is over. In a while, when the dust has settled.” Vulnerability passes over her face, there and gone again. “Someone I need to find.” She nods at Kakashi. “He has had practice. And both Jiraiya and I agreed he should be the next one.” Her eyes twinkle slyly at Minato. “I believe you agree as well?”

Minato grins at her, softly.

Kakashi pulls a face, but stays silent, aware he lost this fight, years ago.

 

Naruto’s voice is a bit sullen, but Kakashi can hear the note of humor in it, the teasing. “I thought I would be the next one.”

Tsunade chuckles. “Maybe in a few years, you brat.” She quirks an eyebrow. “Technically, you’re still a genin… you need to learn a bit more, at the very least.”

Naruto groans, while Sasuke snickers.

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow at him. “That goes for you, too, Uchiha Sasuke. You may both be some of the strongest out here, but you are woefully undereducated, especially in contrast to Sakura.”

It’s Sasuke’s turn to groan, while Naruto throws his head back, shooting Tsunade a pleading look. “But, baa-chan, really, why do I need to learn about tactics and stuff? And history? And all the other boring stuff?”

Kakashi can see Sakura roll her eyes, and he half expects her to bonk Naruto over the head, but it is Kushina who turns to him, hands on her hips. “Do you think being Hokage is a joke?”

Naruto freezes under her gaze, eyes wide. Kakashi can see Minato wince - and step back, just a bit. Naruto stammers. “Erm… no?”

Kushina inclines her head, the air around her crackling somehow. “You better not.” She points her finger… at Kakashi. “He will be the Hokage to prepare the village for your rule… you better make sure you actually are able to take over from him when he says you’re ready. And he will make sure you’re ready.” Her finger points to Naruto now. “And you will make sure you’re ready, I will make sure of that.”

Naruto gulps, visibly. “I… of course.”

Kushina glowers at him for a moment longer, and then steps back, crossing her arms. “Good.”

 

Naruto pulls a bit of a face, his eyes finding Kakashi’s for a moment.

Kakashi gives him a careful eye-smile. And a wink. He can see Naruto relax, just a bit.

 

Tsunade sighs, nodding once. “So many Hokages in this fight.” There is a bittersweet smile on her face. “I would have loved to see him again.” She swallows. “Them.”

Minato speaks up, gently. “He said that they are the past… and that you… we are the future. But he also said he would wait for you. With him.”

Tsunade smiles, for a moment, while her eyes fill with tears. She nods, with a sniff. “And Tobirama?”

Kakashi grunts. “He said someone had to keep an eye on them.”

Tsunade snorts, and then chuckles, hiding her face in her hands for a moment. “Yep, that does sound like him.” She drops her hands, and looks up at Kakashi, her hazel eyes twinkling. “I wonder what grandma Mito will make of them.”

Kushina speaks up, tone dry. “Oh, she knows.” Their eyes turn to her, and she shrugs, with a grin. “She always knew. She told me, when she taught me… she was always aware of this thing between them. That it was more than theory, too.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, looking at her. Wondering if she had always been aware, too. 

He asks, just softly, knowing she understands the double meaning. “And she didn’t mind?”

Kushina’s eyes find his, awareness in them. “Suppressing emotions as powerful as these… is not healthy. And not every attraction is also a betrayal.” She clicks her tongue. “And we all know how powerful their emotions were, don’t we.”

Kakashi nods, his eyes flitting to Obito’s for a moment. “Yeah.”

 

Naruto grimaces, rubbing his neck. “Still. I would have liked to ask him about his cells… I have some of his essence now after all.”

Tenzou speaks up, obviously not quite comfortable in this kind of company. “We can compare notes?”

Naruto blinks up at him, and then grins. “Right.” He pulls a face. “Why didn’t I think of that before?” He groans. “We had so much time on that ship?”

Tenzou grunts, tone beyond dry. “You were… preoccupied.”

Naruto freezes, and then blushes, spectacularly.

Sasuke rolls his eyes. And then inhales, deeply. “It is really over then?”

 

Kakashi blinks, looking over at the tree falling apart behind them for a moment. “It is.” For now. 

He looks back, to see Sasuke run a hand over Naruto’s torn clothing. 

Sasuke’s tone carries regret, and shame, but humor, too. “And all it took for you was to die, once more, teme.”

Naruto blinks, and then sniffs, with a shrug. “Well, I mean, I was able to meet Kakashi’s Dad there…” Kakashi blinks, remembering the comment earlier, yesterday?, his heart hurting for a moment. Naruto continues, with a frown. “And… this new start needs a new life.”

Kakashi frowns, looking at him. His voice is soft. “Who said that?”

Naruto grins for a moment. “He did.” He sobers again, his gaze heavy on Kakashi’s. “We both… died now. Truly died, I mean, passing over.” He hesitates, eyebrows twitching, intoning somehow. “Death has washed away our previous lives.”

Sasuke tilts his head, looking at him from narrowed eyes. His tone is hard. “Washed away?”

Naruto looks at him, and then smiles, gently. “Not like that.” He grimaces, with a shake of his head. “Not yet. That…” His eyes find Kakashi’s again. “That…” He trails off again, obviously at a loss for words.

 

There is a small, uncomfortable pause, with everyone wayyyy too aware for Kakashi’s liking.

He tries not to feel right now. 

 

Obito sniffs, and then nods, tone soft, intoning too. “You’ll probably have to suffer again from now on… but don’t change, keep going your way.”

Naruto blinks at him, and then his eyes find Kakashi’s once more, tone amused. “Hmm, Kakashi once told me the same thing…”

Kakashi blinks, remembering the Land of Waves mission, so long ago. “You remember?”

Naruto grins at him. “Of course, Sensei.”

Kakashi nods, and then shoots a sidelong glance at Obito. And shrugs.

 

Obito rolls his eyes. 

 

Minato clears his voice, opening his hand towards Naruto. “My son, would you…”

Kakashi looks at him, wondering for a moment over this vaguely stiff address, but Naruto seems to love it, stepping over to Minato with a small blush. “Dad?”

Minato smirks at him, and then places his palm onto Naruto’s stomach, his blue eyes finding Naruto’s. “It is time.” Minato’s brow furrows, as he concentrates. “Release.”

Naruto blinks up to him, and then his eyes grow wide as red energy bubbles into him. He gasps, his eyes filling with tears, and then he stumbles back, pressing his own hand onto his stomach.

His voice carries a sob. “Oh god, he’s so… happy?”

 

Kakashi sniffs, understanding too well. His whisper is loud in the sudden silence. “First time that…”, he wrecks his brain for the name for a moment, “Kurama is happy?”

Naruto’s eyes snap to his, trails of silver on his cheeks. Behind him, the sky is turning blue. He nods wildly, silently. 

Kakashi grins at him. “Talking to you?”

Naruto snickers, eyes faraway for a moment. “Uh huh.” And then he laughs out loud, hand flying up to cover his mouth, his eyes sparkling. “Oh god.” He snickers, blushing wildly. “Kurama! Shut up!“

 

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow, in amusement.

And claps her hands. “Alright then.” She looks up at Kakashi, with a smirk. “General Kakashi. Lets go home.”

 

And Kakashi inhales, deeply, nodding, once. “Yes, Godaime.”

 

 

For a moment, Naruto’s eyes find his. 

 

 

 

Kakashi exhales, and turns to do his duty. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

They stop for the night, somewhere, not by necessity but to regroup, physically, and, most of all, mentally. 

 

Kakashi stares at the hastily set up tent‘s walls, unable to sleep. 

 

Unsurprised, really, when reality twists, Obito’s dark eyes anguished. 

 

And Kakashi reaches for him, with a brittle, little smile, the taste of salt on his lips, and the awareness of inevitability in his mind. 

 

And Obito sighs, into his mouth.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

It’s weird being back.

And good.

 

 

But weird.

 

 

And it’s been only like… a week? A couple of days?

 

 

It feels like an eternity.

 

Everything has changed.

And stayed the same.

 

 

Kakashi grimaces, staring up at the ceiling in his little… apartment.

 

 

They had arrived yesterday at noon, the part of the army compromised of Konoha ninjas returning to the village elated and happy to return to their families and friends… and the tiniest bit confused about what exactly happened there, on that battlefield.

And a lot more quiet than anticipated, everybody somehow locked into their own thoughts.

 

Into the memory of their dream.

 

 

It’s been weird not having the memory of one, too.

Because there’s a lingering sadness in people‘s eyes. 

 

 

A yearning. 

 

 

He‘s also encountered something like… helpless pity when people realize he had not dreamed. 

 

 

 

It’s vaguely unsettling, because it reminds Kakashi of his own yearning for beyond. 

 

Which is a dangerous thing to have on a massive scale. 

 

 

 

So. 

 

Pulling people back to reality seems to be of importance. 

 

 

Kakashi knows he will have to go and hold a speech at some point.

Or go and speak with people, directly.

 

If he can choose, it’ll be the latter. 

Definitely.

 

 

He knows Obito is in a little, hastily set up house, close to the one Itachi is in. 

Obito hasn‘t been by yet, being a model prisoner for now. 

He knows Kushina and Minato have been invited to the still standing Hokage mansion. 

He knows Kaguya is there as well, under guard.

 

Sakura had hovered in front of Itachi’s house… and then gone to do double shifts at the hospital.

Guy is currently at said hospital, being checked, thoroughly.

 

Tenzou had gone, immediately, to the shelters. To his family.

Kakashi smiles softly, knowing there’ll be a wedding at some point.

 

 

 

Sasuke and Naruto are back in their tent.

 

 

So. 

So far, so good. 

 

Or bad.

 

 

 

Kakashi turns, with a sigh, staring unseeing at Mr. Ukki 1 & 2.

 

 

 

Now that he’s back… he doesn’t know what to feel.

It’s all a mess.

 

 

A big, jumbled, twisted and … difficult mess.

 

 

 

 

Kakashi reaches up with his left hand, traces the tips of his fingers over the soft skin underneath his eye, feeling the organ under the thin skin, the dip of the scar. 

New eyes. 

 

His eyes. Obito’s eyes, made for him by Naruto.

What will I see through these new eyes? What will the world see when they look at me now?

 

He turns back onto his back, trying to find a more comfortable position. 

Will they really not tire? What will it take, to reawaken them? Can I really reawaken them?

 

He frowns, realizing he won’t have to pull down the hitai-ate now anymore.

Another piece of me revealed… 

 

He stares up into the gloomy dark, watching the little lights go off behind his own eyes.

By now, word will have traveled. Everyone will know Obito kissed me, though at least they don’t know of the nightly visit. And they know he kissed Minato, too.

 

Kakashi swallows, belatedly blushing again by the mere thought of Kushina’s… suggestion. 

And then grins, fleetingly, his heartbeat quickening instantly, at the memory of Naruto’s… pissed off tone.

 

Naruto, whose expression had been thoughtful on the way back.

Elated, relieved, happy, tired, amused and… thoughtful. 

 

Sometimes there had been a slightly pinched expression, too.

 

 

Kakashi hadn’t asked.

He’d noticed though that Sasuke hadn’t either.

 

 

He blinks, realizing that Sasuke and Naruto have been together now for over half a year. 

Already. Time flies.

Just… here a week. There a week. Here a few days, there a few days. Rebuilding Konoha. Training. The prison. The boat trip. War preparations.

 

He snorts to himself. And now it is the beginning of October and he has recog…

Kakashi stops, literally halting his own thoughts, eye crawling up to the small calendar he has on the wall.

 

It’s October 10 th .

 

 

 

Oh.

 

 

 

 

I HAVE to find a cake.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Thankfully some of the bakeries are running smoothly in the new market district, already, and Kakashi waits for them to open, very early in the morning, deeply inhaling the smells.

Aligning his memories of Konoha with the way it is reviving now.

The streets are roughly in the same place, as people seem to have wanted to return to and rebuild their literal homes. A few decided otherwise though, probably moving to the outskirts or the countryside, and so Kakashi takes care to take all the new buildings and free spaces in, the houses and stalls and shops he had had no time to notice prior to the war. 

 

When he’d been busy preparing everybody for a potential massacre.

 

Kakashi blinks, one hand coming up to trace the sign on his hitai-ate, realizing he put the ‘shinobi’ one on instead of the Leaf’s. 

He inhales, and then chuckles, shaking his head at himself.

 

The door to the bakery opens, and the baker, a sturdy and jovial man, who is a few years older than him, greets him warmly. “Kakashi-sama. What a joy to see you here.”

Kakashi grimaces, just a bit, waving his hand. “Kakashi, please. I… need a cake.”

The man quirks an eyebrow, and Kakashi remembers suddenly that he is called Kikaru, and has been delivering sweets for Tsunade’s inauguration back then.

Kikaru nods. “Please do come in, Kakashi-san. What kind of cake would you like?”

“Ahhh.” Kakashi frowns. “I need a birthday cake. But one with frosting.”

Kikaru hums, gesticulating at the display with various cakes. “We can literally do any flavor or color you wish for. Any shape or decoration. To when do you need it?”

Kakashi grimaces, and then shrugs. “Now?”

Kikaru blinks. And then shrugs, with a small smile. “So, maybe one of these?”

Kakashi chuckles. “Yes, maybe indeed.” He gives Kikaru an eye-smile, and then inspects the cakes closely, his eyes catching on a blue one, that is almost without decorations.

He points at it. “Is that one free to be purchased? Or has it been preordered?”

Kikaru shakes his head. “No, that is one where we tried the new food coloring with. My daughter Hinari wanted it to match the sky.”

Kakashi hums, nodding. “And it does.” Or certain eyes. He hesitates. “Can you… maybe put decorations on it?” He frowns. “And what flavor is it?”

Kikaru leans in. “Tangerine buttercream with some ginger-lime ganache to offset the sweetness. The cake dough itself is vanilla and one thin chocolate layer. And of course we can put more decoration on.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. Tangerine, huh. That fits. “That does sound perfect.”

Kikaru looks at him. “What kind of decorations do you want?”

Kakashi hesitates, and then shakes his head, slowly. And then he shrugs. “Can you put a sun on it? And… a moon? And sprinkle a few stars all round?”

Kikaru beams at him. “Of course, Kakashi-san. I would need only a short while for that. Would you like to wait here, or…”

Kakashi weighs his head. “If it is alright, I will wait. I would love to take a few of the shokupan if you don’t mind?”

Kikaru smiles broadly, and then pulls a small seat from behind the counter. “Of course. Please, sit down. Would you like a tea with it? My wife has always some to spare.”

Kakashi hesitates, and then settles, with a small sigh, tone apologetic. “I do not wish to cause you inconvenience.”

Kikaru waves at him. “No inconvenience, Kakashi-san.” He disappears for a moment, and then returns with a small tablet with steaming green tea, serving it to Kakashi, before retrieving some of the rolls. 

 

Kakashi nods in thanks, hesitating, and then pulling down his mask when he sees Kikaru turning his back to pull out the cake and place it on the worktable to start on the decorations.

Kakashi inhales, deeply, the slightly tart taste of the pumpkin blending perfectly with the soft bread dough. “These are delicious.”

Kikaru nods, not turning round, pulling out more fondant from a cupboard. “Yes, they turned out quite well, thank you.” 

There is an undertone to the answer and Kakashi frowns, taking a sip of tea, before asking. “You’re not happy with them?”

Kikaru sighs, and then shrugs. “I … I dreamed I made a bread so delicious all the kings came here to take one bite. And Hinari was able to color them perfectly, in the most beautiful colors.” He hesitates, and then snorts. “A stupid dream, really.” He turns slightly to Kakashi for a moment, but doesn’t really look back. “I remember being so happy.”

Kakashi exhales, staring down at his roll. He keeps his tone soft. “Would you like to go back to it?”

Kikaru hesitates, and then shakes his head, once. “No, I mean, it was a dream, I know, and … but it was beautiful.” He exhales, and then clears his throat. “And waking up was hard.”

Kakashi presses his lips together for a moment, staring at the last piece in his fingers. His voice sounds faraway. “You long for it.”

Kikaru sniffs. “Yes.”

 

There is a silence, and Kakashi does not break it, finishing his meal in it, lost in his own thoughts.

And feelings.

 

He pulls up his mask, giving Kikaru an eye-smile when he finally turns around again. 

Kikaru extends the cake to Kakashi, carefully. “Here, is this to your liking?”

Kakashi blinks, looking at the sun and the moon, embraced by a glitter of stars, facing each other.

He smiles, gently, hovering his fingers over the decorations for a long moment. “It’s perfect.” 

He nods, stepping back. “What do I owe you?”

Kikaru puts the cake down, waving at him, face set. “Oh, nothing, nothing Kakashi-san. You are the one who led us so brilliantly in this war. It is my honor.”

Kakashi grimaces, watching Kikaru for a long moment. “Are… you sure?” He raises his eyebrows, adding on a whim, tone carrying vague amusement and… trepidation. “I am also the one who keeps pardoning some of our enemies?”

Kikaru laughs out, loudly, and then reaches out, hesitantly, putting his hand onto Kakashi’s shoulder for just a moment. “Ah, but Kakashi-san. You are also the one who brought back the Yondaime and his wife. I was heartbroken when he died back then… my heart has filled with joy hearing the news.” Kikaru sniffs, his eyes filling with tears. “And for their child…”

He shakes his head, sniffing again. “This is for their son, is it not? It should be his birthday today.”

Kakashi nods, unable to speak.

Kikaru nods, and then turns to wrap the cake. “Well then, this is my gift for him, too. You cannot pay me.”

Kakashi exhales, and then nods again, still pulling out his purse. “But I will pay you for the rolls.”

Kikaru chuckles, and then he grins. “As you wish.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He clears his throat, with a sigh, before calling out. “Good Morning Naruto, could you come out for a moment?”

 

He waits outside the tent entrance flap, staring unseeing at the cloth. 

He knows Naruto and Sasuke are inside, and… still in bed, if the rustling and sudden whispers are any indication.

 

Which is not surprising given the hour, and the ordeal they went through. 

Still. 

 

Kakashi would rather bite his own hand off right now than waltz in there unannounced.

 

 

There are steps now, and then the flap is thrown back, Sasuke’s purple eyes blinking up at him, the black hair tousled.

Kakashi blinks as well, vaguely amused by the realization that early mornings do not seem to be something that Sasuke likes to do. Well, you have that much in common with Naruto.

He nods at Sasuke, watching him yawn. “I am sorry to wake you. But I have…” He trails off, and then extends his hands, which carry the box. “I have something that Naruto should have gotten every year.”

Sasuke belatedly hides his yawn behind a hand, and then shakes himself, blinking rapidly. “Oh?”

He shoots Kakashi a look, and it’s painfully open, full of awareness, the usual lingering animosity tempered somehow. 

Sasuke smirks, just softly. “That is… “ He trails off, and then frowns, inhaling deeply, and then raises his chin, his tone just the tiniest bit harder once more. “Come on in, Kakashi.”

“Errr…” Kakashi grimaces, shooting a look at the open tent flap. “Are you sure?”

Sasuke rolls his eyes, and then steps aside, holding it open for him. “Just…”

 

Kakashi grunts, and then grimaces, and steps in, fingers cramping on the edges of the box.

 

Naruto is sitting crosslegged on the futon bed in the back, hair tousled and eyes still sleepy, but it is the smell that really drives the situation home for Kakashi, the heady mix of both their scents condensed in the small space.

Carrying their relationship.

Kakashi inhales, shudderingly, tasting them on his tongue.

 

In a very remote area of his brain he notes that he really likes that taste.

 

Naruto yawns, rubbing his eyes. “Sensei?” He blinks up at Kakashi. “What are you doing here so early? I thought debriefing had been postponed?”

Kakashi nods, stepping closer until he stands just a foot in front of Naruto, feeling Sasuke hover behind him. He clears his throat. “And it is. No worries. But…” He holds out the box, waits until Naruto reaches up and takes it from him. “But I felt, after last year…”

Naruto stares down at the box, and then smiles, a shaky little smile that tugs at Kakashi’s heart. “Oh.”

Sasuke steps round Kakashi, and flops down on the bed next to him, nodding at the box. “Open it, teme.”

Naruto sniffs, and shoots him a look, and then folds back the lid, carefully.

Kakashi shifts, waiting, seeing both their gazes riveted to the cake inside, for long moments.

It’s Sasuke who blinks up first, the lilac eyes filled with so much vulnerability it tears at Kakashi. He stays silent though, waiting for Naruto to react, just leaning into Naruto to lend strength.

 

Naruto sniffs, eventually, and then starts to smile, broadly, like the sun.

Kakashi watches the smile, unable not to echo it, seeing Sasuke smile helplessly, too.

 

The thought carries a vague sense of humor.

Ahhhh, we’re both just helpless when it comes to him. 

 

Somehow that helps.

 

Naruto chuckles, once, and then the smile gentles to a grin, tone soft. “Thank you so much, Se… Kakashi.” He swallows, obviously fighting for levity. “Only missing a candle.”

Kakashi blinks, and then raises a finger, starting to look through the small pockets in his vest. “Right. Just a second…” He fights the small candle he put in there after a moment, holding it out to Naruto. “Tadaaa.”

Sasuke snorts and takes it, concentrating just a bit before spitting a miniature flame at it. He watches it flicker for a moment, and then places it onto the cake, in the middle between the sun and the moon on it, with an exhale. “There.” He smirks. “And now you have to blow it out and make a wish, so we can eat it.”

Naruto blinks and then nods. “Right.” He hums, weighing his head, and then closes his eyes, blowing the candle out, reopening his eyes, unseeing on the smoke rising from the wick. 

He swallows, tone just vaguely off. “We’ll see if this wish comes true.”

Kakashi smiles, softly. “I hope it does.” Whatever it was. You deserve it.

 

Naruto’s eyes find his, for a long moment.

 

And then he scoots over, with a sidelong glance at Sasuke, who does the same, with a small grunt. 

Naruto’s voice is carefully chipper. “Sit down, Sensei.”

“Ahhh…” Kakashi gesticulates towards the tent entrance. “I didn’t mean to ruin your whole morning, I just…”

Naruto glowers at him. Silently.

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Right.” He sits down, too, tone deliberately light. “Don’t mind if I do then.”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, turning his head to shoot a look at Sasuke, before scooting back a bit, so he can look at both of them. Both Kakashi and Sasuke turn towards him, sitting sideways.

Naruto grins. “Okay. Who wants some cake?”

Sasuke blinks, tone defeated. “Now?”

Kakashi shoots him a look. Not a fan of cake this early in the morning either? But already knowing we’re not getting out of it? He clears his throat. “We don’t have tableware here? Plates?”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “Pfffft.” His eyes sparkle, tone… sharp. And breathless. “Mask off, Sensei.”

Kakashi blinks, stunned into silence by the simple order. Sasuke doesn’t seem to breathe.

 

And then Kakashi reaches up, pulls down his mask, as if in trance.

Kakashi can hear Sasuke swallow.

 

Naruto’s voice shivers, the words a whisper as he scoops up a bit of cake with his fingers, making a big gash in the beautiful frosting. “Open up wide.”

 

Kakashi isn’t sure why he follows that… order, just that he does.

So does Sasuke, right after, seeming in a similar state.

 

Naruto bites his lips, giving them both a chunk of cake. 

For a moment, Kakashi thinks he can see a mark in Naruto’s palm, but he dismisses it, immediately, when the cake touches his lips.

 

The taste explodes on Kakashi’s tongue, the flavors mixing enticingly, but it’s all a backseat sensation-wise, because Naruto’s fingers burn where they touch Kakashi’s face. 

And mouth.

And his lips. 

 

And tongue.

 

Kakashi watches Naruto put a morsel into his own mouth, too, eyes glowing. 

And dark.

 

 

Kakashi’s tattoo pulses.

 

 

Sasuke’s voice is breathless. “You’re a fiend.”

 

Naruto grins, mouth smeared with frosting. He smacks his lips, tone not an iota apologetic. "Well, if I‘m stuck in this impossible situation with you two, and Obito, and my parents anyways, I can just make the best of it, right?“ He grins, while Kakashi stares. Naruto licks a crumb out of the corner of his mouth, eyes blue fire, voice dropping to a whisper. "Besides, it’s my birthday, and you have to do what I want, right.“

 

Sasuke snorts, sharing an quick look with a dumbfounded Kakashi. "Yeah, and what do you want?“

Naruto hums, scooping up some more cake. 

He weighs his head. "A kiss would be nice? From both of you? I mean Obito got one, and my Dad got one, and Kakashi got one… I want my own.“

Silence, as both Kakashi and Sasuke stare at him. 

 

Naruto smirks for a moment, and then raises his eyebrows, setting laser eyes on Kakashi’s. "One more bite… Sensei?“

Kakashi clears his throat. "Maybe… I should go.“

Sasuke quirks an eyebrow, silent. 

Naruto exhales, in a rush, but the holds out his cake-smeared fingers. "But I want you to stay. And I want my gift.“

Kakashi swallows, harshly. "Naruto…“

Sasuke speaks up, tone very controlled. "I‘d like to see it?“ He hesitates, his purple eyes finding Kakashi’s. "He told me about last year.“

Kakashi shivers. 

 

And then he blushes, frantically searching for a way out that wouldn’t wound Naruto. And himself. 

Yeah. Fat chance. 

"I… Naruto, I told you…“

Naruto interjects, tone calm. Too calm. Emphasizing heavily. "But I know now.“

 

The simple statement hangs in the air, stifling and vicious. 

 

Kakashi swallows, looking away. 

Refusing to feel the burning of the tattoo. 

Refusing to look at Sasuke, too.

 

Sasuke hums, tone deliberately dry. "I hadn’t thought you’d be so pretty, you know.“

Kakashi snorts, closing his eyes, and shaking his head once. "Hope you’re not disappointed.“

Sasuke grins. "We used to think up ways to take off your mask… we thought you were hiding crooked teeth or bulging lips under it. We even teamed up with a photographer once, to try to trick you.“

Kakashi reopens his eyes, slowly, locking them with Naruto’s - who starts to giggle. 

Sasuke frowns. "What.“

Naruto starts to laugh, a laugh that shakes, full-bellied, and contagious. "He… that… oh Sasuke, that photographer was Kakashi!?!“

Sasuke‘s mouth drops open, and Kakashi cannot help himself, he joins in, chuckling, and shaking his head. "Sorry Sasuke, but you genins were so cute… and oblivious.“

Naruto chortles, pointing a messy finger. "Oh you should have seen your faces!!“

Sasuke blinks at him, obviously weirded out. "How exactly did you know?“

Kakashi shrugs, answering for Naruto, who is still laughing. "I… used a name I knew would tip him off because I had used it before. And he caught on.“ Kakashi sniffs, deciding to put his finger into the proverbial wound, just the tiniest bit. "I mean… it is a play on my real name, right.“

Sasuke stares at him, unseeing, and Kakashi can see the moment it clicks, the groan that follows seemingly coming from the bottom of Sasuke’s soul. "Oh god.“ He puts his hands over his face. "Ah man, you’re as bad as he is.“

Naruto snickers. 

Sasuke holds up a finger. "Does Sakura know?“

Kakashi shrugs. "I don’t think so?“

The finger swivels round to point at him. "I‘ll tell her.“

Kakashi grins. "Alright.“

 

They are silent for a moment, each grinning, and it’s easier suddenly, awareness simmering, but breathable, digestible, somehow. 

Naruto exhales. “Fine.” He puts the box with the mangled cake to the side, noisily slurping his fingers clean, before wiping them on his shirt. He rolls his eyes at Sasuke’s grimace. “I’ll wash it later, honestly.” He winks at Sasuke and then he shuffles forward, on his knees… and right up onto Kakashi’s lap.

Kakashi grunts, trying to rear back a bit, but Naruto just follows him, shaking his head, arms coming up to lock around Kakashi’s neck. “Nuh uh, Kakashi, no can do.”

Behind him Sasuke pipes up, tone beyond dry, with an undertone that cuts. “Come on, Sensei, you know it’s a lost cause?”

Kakashi blinks, and then tears his gaze from Naruto’s, to look over Naruto’s shoulder at Sasuke, a bit consternated, while trying very hard to ignore Naruto shuffling around on him. “Why are you okay with this?”

Sasuke grins at him, a grin that carries a hint of pain, too. “Someone reminded me a while ago that I should be happy with what I’m given.” The grin broadens again, growing more true. “Of course it helps you’re hot.”

Kakashi shoots him a skunk-eye. 

And then closes his eyes, for a moment, not daring to truly feel Naruto’s weight on his… body. 

He clears his throat. “Naruto, I…” I might break. He blinks, suddenly realizing he did not think ‘will’, the distinction making him frown. I might, yes. But now that the bond has actually engaged… now that I know. And he knows… and somehow… 

Naruto inhales, deeply, and then nods, suddenly dead serious. Whispering. “I know.”

 

Kakashi blinks, and looks up at him… and suddenly knows, too. 

 

I’ve known. I’ve known since Sasuke asked if you would come with him. 

Since you went after him, there on the battle field.

 

I‘ve know that it… will be. 

 

He smiles, softly, relaxing in increments and allowing the thought, the realization, and then allowing the weight, and the feeling, and the body-heat, and the smell.

Naruto tilts his head, leaning in.

 

 

Blue is all Kakashi sees now. 

And gold.

 

 

Love, blinding, fathomless deep and tranquil, is all he feels.

 

 

 

Reality seems to drop away.

 

 

 

And then his eyes close, as skin and breath and heat whisper over his lips.

 

 

It’s different now, than a year ago.

 

There is no frantic need, no vicious lust.

 

No guilt.

 

 

 

 

This time, when Naruto’s lips touch his there simply is… righteousness.

 

 

 

 

Naruto shivers, the kiss dry, lingering and soft, but scorching, the desire and lust threaded through, yes, but sedate, an offer, undemanding.

Just a promise, full of possibility.

 

 

Kakashi’s hands clench into the blanket he is sitting on, Naruto’s legs pressing them down. 

 

 

And then Naruto withdraws again, gently, nipping along the edges of Kakashi’s lips, before nosing over his face for a moment. 

He hums, and then leans back, and Kakashi reopens his eyes, slowly, staring at him, breathlessly, his mouth tingling and he yearns for more, and it must transmit, because Naruto exhales, shudderingly, leaning forward again to push his forehead onto Kakashi’s hitai-ate. 

Naruto grins suddenly, staring at Kakashi from close distance, their eyes flitting back and forth, unfocused. “You still taste very different.”

Kakashi blinks, and then smiles, softly. “Enjoying the different tastes?”

Naruto hums, and then shrugs, grinning. “Today, definitely.”

Kakashi grins back and then swallows, his voice dropping to a whisper. Unable not to ask. “You feel it too, don’t you?”

 

It’s not Naruto who answers, Sasuke piping up behind Naruto, dragging Kakashi back to reality. “He does.”

Kakashi blinks, and then looks at Sasuke, while Naruto leans back a bit, and turns to Sasuke, right there on Kakashi’s lap. Kakashi tries not to think about certain pressure on certain parts.

Naruto extends his hand, and Sasuke scoots closer, purple eyes watchful.

Naruto puts his palm on Sasuke’s jaw.

 

And leans down to kiss him, too.

 

 

It takes a moment, for the thought to reach Kakashi’s brain, but it is…

 

 

 

It’s beautiful.

 

There simply is no other word for it.

 

 

 

 

Kakashi watches Sasuke receive the kiss, like a blessing, an expression of bliss passing over his face, for just a moment.

 

Kakashi wonders if he might look the same.

He has the sneaking suspicion that yes, he does. 

 

 

Naruto withdraws, slowly, hand gliding along Sasuke’s jaw. 

He turns back to Kakashi, his blue eyes full of soul.

 

His words are a whisper, one hand dropping down to press over his seal. “I… can feel the bond now. I know the bond. I… need the bond.” He frowns, and then huffs a laugh. “But I cannot. Not fully. Not yet.”

 

And Kakashi exhales, and then shrugs and smiles, beatifically, repeating, once more. “Never doubt that I will be here.”

Naruto’s eyes fill with tears, and Kakashi pulls his hands out from beneath his legs, reaching up to hold him, one hand going up to stroke a whiskered cheek. “Shhh. It’s alright. I promise. I have waited… I can wait still. Just…” He shakes his head, and then snorts. “Just be happy, Naruto.”

 

Ultimately, that is all I want.

 

He swallows, realizing it’s the truth, too.

 

 

Behind Naruto, Sasuke exhales waveringly, and then sniffs.

His voice is scratchy. “Who knows, I might run across my soul-mate soon, and then I’m gonna dump your ass faster than you can count to ten?”

Naruto gasps a laugh, a tear dropping, and Kakashi grins, somewhat painfully, and Naruto turns his head back, just a bit, grinning fiendishly through the tears. “Oh yeah. Think you can just forget me?”

And Sasuke snorts, and then sobers, and then shakes his head, but it is Kakashi who answers, with a shake of his own head. “Never.”

He blinks, sharing a long look with Sasuke.

 

Kakashi tilts his head, once more stroking a whiskered cheek, and then he leans in, pressing a kiss to the soft skin under Naruto’s eyes. Whispering against it. “Happy birthday, Naruto. Thank you for saving Guy. Thank you, and Sasuke, and Sakura, for finding a way.”

He withdraws again, his voice shaking. “Somehow, with this war, the curse of losing my friends has been stopped, against all odds.” He swallows, blinking rapidly, and then coughs a laugh, voice raw. “Some are even back now.” He sniffs, and then nods, with a small smile. “Life holds promises once more. That… is more than I had anticipated.”

 

More than I had dared to hope for.

 

Naruto frowns, quipping, but Kakashi can hear the effort of it. “Oh? You hadn’t waited for the bond to engage? Anticipated it?”

Kakashi hums, weighing his head. “Anticipated, wished for, dreaded, feared, dreamed… all that and more.” He huffs, and swallows. “This bond… it has torn at me, at us both, for years. We can let it… simmer for a little while longer.”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, and then shuffles back, slowly, the absence of his weight and heat harsh. He nods, a bit wildly. “Yeah, I guess we can.”

 

Kakashi nods, too, and then indicates the cake. “Want another one to take to your parents?”

Naruto blinks, and then laughs, loudly, one hand coming up to scratch his head. “Ah, well…” He hesitates, the laugh gentling to a grin. “No. But I’ll allow them to use something else than my fingers.”

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head, trying to imagine Kushina reacting to this. “You better.”

 

Naruto grins suddenly. “Think my Mom will tell you to kiss my Dad again?”

“Uhhhhhhhh….” Kakashi blinks, brain flatlined, and then blushes, spectacularly. Sasuke snorts.

Naruto’s grin broadens. “That’s something you really wanted, huh.”

Kakashi grimaces, feeling himself burn. “Once upon a time, maybe.”

Naruto nods, still grinning. “Uh huh.”

Kakashi clears his throat, and then pushes up, and then bows, playfully. “And with that, I will leave you to wash that shirt and enjoy your day.”

 

Naruto blinks up at him, eyes sparkling, but his tone is a bit more sober. “What will you do today, Sensei?”

Kakashi shrugs, reaching up to pull up his mask again. “I’m not sure yet. Probably lots and lots of administrative duties. And I need to go and talk with people. It seems that the dream left a lot of longing behind. Yearning.”

Naruto hums, weighing his head. “And we know how bad that can be.”

Kakashi blinks, looking down at him, and then swallows, with a curt nod. “Yes.” We know.

He nods at Sasuke. “Sasuke.” He turns away, and then hesitates, looking back over his shoulder. With a wink. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

Sasuke snorts, but his eyes sparkle. “Ha ha.”

 

Kakashi grins, and then winks at Naruto, too, and leaves their tent, feeling lighter than he had felt entering it. 

 

 

By leagues.

 

 

 

And his bleeding heart does not hurt as much anymore, somehow.

 

 

He straightens up outside the tent, and looks up into the blue sky and it is… alright.

 

A falcon cries, and the sounds of morning Konoha drift over, and there’s people hustling around already, and the sun is illuminating everything, though the earth is still damp from the night.

 

 

 

And something begins to thrum through him. 

 

And it’s a good feeling.

 

A feeling that tickles his tattoo.

 

His mind.

 

His heart.

 

His gut.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Anticipation.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

That … errr…. memory fueled kiss resulted from this tie-in standalone fic I wrote a while back - the idea of connecting it didn’t leave me alone anymore ^^:
https://archiveofourown.org/works/34432684

Chapter 42: To shape the future

Notes:

Sorry, long note:

We are entering the phase of the fic now that will really/gradually build “them”… before, it’s been the bond, and gradual acceptance, and a kind of instinctual, deep and ever changing love, paired with eventual helpless attraction and almost frantic anticipation. And all the mess around them (including “Sasuke” here).

But… I wanted/want more for them. I want more for what I put the poor Kakashi through *laughs*
And so I’m going to… let him, let them - fall in love.
Properly I mean. Beyond the lust.

Without the Damocle’s sword of fate “threatening”, but the promise of it, accepted.

With people around them knowing, and accepting, too. Pushing a bit, even 😈

I’ve said it before, when I started this fic, I had a clear vision of the scenes at the beginning and end - and I actually commissioned arts for it, bc they were so clear in my mind (and this vision has been driving me through this monster fic :))))

So there’s quite a bit to come still - I hope you’ll take that last… not really short leg of the journey with me :)

AND: Please, if you haven’t, please take a look at Anannua’s beautiful and hilarious comic strip they did for the last chapter *cries a bit* - look at the expressions?!!! Ana’s just a wizard.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

The halls under the Hokage tower are cool, and just vaguely damp, the hallways hewn into the depth of the mountain behind it just the tiniest bit uneven.

 

Kakashi follows the winding corridor down, to the sealing hall, mind reflecting on the last time he was here, with Sasuke, a felt eternity ago.

And once again I meet him here… in the flickering light.

 

Tsunade nods at him, waiting in front of the door to the locked hall that contains the hall that has been strengthened with multi-purpose seals, meant to enforce any seal used inside. “Kakashi. Thank you for coming.”

He nods back, and then shrugs, words echoing. “Of course. I wasn’t quite sure where to start today anyway.” He sighs, and then chuckles, drily. “This is as good as any, I suppose.”

Tsunade tilts her head, with a small smirk. “Hmmm. And here I thought you were found by my Anbu in front of Naruto’s tent.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, in mock anger. “You had them spy on me?”

Tsunade exhales, and then gives him a quick grin. “No, but I did want to know your emotional state.” Her voice softens. “I’m glad it seems to be fine.”

Kakashi nods, clearing his throat, and then exhales. “What about you. Do you mourn your dream, too?”

Tsunade grimaces, just a bit, her eyes flitting away for a split second. “Yes… and no.”

He quirks an eyebrow, and she waves at him, with a sigh. “Let’s do that later.” She points her thumb at the door. “First, him.”

Kakashi rolls his shoulders, and sighs. “Right.”

 

 

Tsunade pushes the door open, a whiff of cold air brushing along Kakashi’s skin like cold fingers. 

There’s candles lit, throwing shadows all around the room, the small area between the pillars cast in flickering shadows.

 

Orochimaru is sitting in the spot Sasuke sat, years ago, the lines on the floor around him intricate, but also very different to the ones back then. 

He looks up to them, knees drawn up, arms lazily hooked around them. The green eyes sparkle and shift in the flickering light. The long tongue flicks out for an instant. “Ahhhhh, the current and the next Hokage… so sweet of you to come by….”

Tsunade grunts, crossing her arms. “Oh stop it, Orochimaru. As if you really care.”

Orochimaru tilts his head, the long black hair shifting. “But I do?” His eyes flicker to Kakashi. “I always did… After all I cleared the way for you, did I not?”

Tsunade scoffs. “You make it sound as if I should thank you.”

Orochimaru hums, and then pushes up, in one fluid motion. Kakashi suppresses the instinct to step back. “And why should you not… sending our Sensei to hell was a fitting punishment, was it not?” Orochimaru chuckles, while Tsunade presses her lips together, silent. Orochimaru’s voice grows almost sweet. “Though he managed that all by himself, thinking he did the right thing.” His voice grows viciously cold for a moment. “For once.”

He turns away, just slightly, and Kakashi stares at his profile, the reality of what he knows about this… Sannin standing in front of him crashing into him, fully, for the first time.

 

Before, it’s been abstract. 

Knowledge, yes, but something unaddressed, because Orochimaru had been the enemy, simply too dangerous to give any maneuvering space.

 

Now though…

 

Kakashi shoots a look at Tsunade, who is still glowering at Orochimaru, but who is doing so silently, her expression pinched.

He clears his throat. “And what now, Orochimaru. What…” He trails off, not really sure how to phrase ‘what do you want us to do while we wreck our brains for suitable punishment for you while also taking into account that you resurrected the kages and thereby created the possibility to win the war and bring Minato and Kushina back… while also knowing all that’. 

Orochimaru hums, tongue snaking out. “Ah… well. Let me help you.” He spreads his arms, long fingers spread as well. “You cannot kill me.” He chuckles, the sound echoing round the chamber. “Others have tried, and succeeded, in a way, but, other than your precious Sensei, Kakashi, I do not need help to resurrect.”

Tsunade interjects, tone icy. “And of course you have taken precautions.”

Orochimaru hums, eyes narrowing. “Of course.” His eyes find Kakashi’s again. “I have told you, I do wish to live, and not be hunted anymore.” The tongue snakes out again, for a longer moment. “I will be content to stay in one of my hideouts, doing my research.” He chuckles. “Under guard, of course.”

Kakashi grimaces, and then shakes his head, once. “We cannot allow you to continue your experiments.”

Orochimaru waves at him. “Oh no, Kakashi, I won’t need to continue those… not directly. All I need is myself. And one other thing.”

Kakashi blinks, pulling a face. “Letting the thought of possessing Sasuke go?”

Orochimaru shrugs, with a roll of his eyes. “Sasuke is trouble… even more now than before.” He chuckles, eyes glittering. “But you know that, do you not?”

Kakashi gnashes his teeth, but Tsunade interjects, saving Kakashi from unlocking his jaw. “Enough. Why are you pushing at him like this?”

 

Orochimaru hums, and then locks his eyes with Kakashi’s. “Your bond has engaged, has it not?”

Kakashi works his jaw, for a moment. “And what is it to you?”

Orochimaru quirks an eyebrow. “You are here…” He smiles, quick and sardonic. “I had not expected that.”

Kakashi blinks, a shiver running down his spine. “You hadn’t…” He pauses, and then narrows his eyes. Stating. “Anticipated that.” He raises his chin. “You had thought I would be preoccupied, unable to take over from Tsunade in a while, or care for Konoha’s needs, simply because the bond would have taken all my… attention?” He frowns. And you thought you could get her to agree to something?

Orochimaru’s eyes stare into his, for a long moment. His voice is almost flat. “Why doesn’t it?”

Kakashi exhales, seeing Tsunade look over at him, attentive. Probably wondering that herself.

He frowns, and then shrugs, slowly. “I am actually not sure. There was this moment…” He hesitates, debating whether to really speak it out now, here, with him, but then he locks his gaze with hers, speaking to her only. 

She, who had always supported him. 

He clears his throat. “There was this moment, on the battle field. I was devastated, after the bond engaged. And he… left with Sasuke. Sen… the Yondaime told me that it would be alright. That I knew it would be.” He hesitates, and then snorts, and sniffs. “And I do.” He shrugs, reaching for the correct words. “It’s like… thunder in the distance. It’s not a promise anymore, it’s tangible, in the air.  Approaching. I know it will be. So does he.” 

He swallows, whispering. “I can feel the anticipation.” He shares an eye-smile with her and then turns his head back to Orochimaru, who is watching him intently. “The devastation is gone. The almost obsessive reaching for it… the need for it, too. Because it is.”

 

There is a moment, a long moment, as the silence settles. 

 

Kakashi inhales, deeply, and then turns fully back to Orochimaru, tone cold. “So. The question is… why did you count on me being distracted?”

 

Orochimaru stares at him, for so long that Kakashi can see Tsunade getting angry, from the corner of his eyes.

Tsunade opens her mouth, but Orochimaru speaks then, his tone… off. “I have to say, watching it all develop has proven to be quite fascinating.” 

Kakashi blinks, echoing. “Fascinating.”

Orochimaru shrugs, and then almost rolls his eyes. “I never cared much, my goals and ambitions were always very far removed from those around me. Especially after… I left.” Kakashi grimaces, noting the pause, heavy with meaning. Orochimaru chuckles, darkly. “And, given I knew that, bond or not, the simple fact itself was no deterrent for anything… I hated the very thought of it.” The long tongue comes out, for a moment. “I chose not to look. I decided it was stupid. I watched you suffer, I saw others suffer and I decided I did not wish to experience anything like that.”

There is a grimace on that youthful face now, one of disgust. It stays for long seconds, and then dissolves, into painful neutrality. 

Kakashi watches him, with a frown, trying to follow. “And then…”

Orochimaru pulls a face, and then sends him a heated gaze. “Then, I decided to possess the last Uchiha.”

Kakashi blinks, and then… “Ahhhhhhhhhh. And you saw him and his obsession with and for Naruto. You probably knew of Naruto’s obsession. You probably thought that emotions as strong as these only happen in bonds, if at all. And now you had a front row seat…”

Tsunade interjects, her tone soft. “And you wanted to feel it for yourself.”

Orochimaru grimaces once more, and then exhales, closing his eyes, for a long moment. “Jiraiya always used to say that there’s love outside bonds.” His face turns stubborn. “I decided I wanted it.”

Tsunade’s face twitches, but she doesn’t speak, her big eyes unseeing on Orochimaru.

Kakashi nods, and then blinks, and shrugs. “Still. What does that have to do with me being distracted?”

 

Tsunade answers, tone faraway. “You wanted the samples.” Her hazel eyes lock with Orochimaru’s. “The samples you made, stored away, decades ago. He sealed them, back then. That seal can only be opened by a Hokage and an Anbu squad.” She snorts, but the sound is devoid of any humor. “You thought that you could manipulate Kakashi a lot easier into opening that seal if his mind was utterly preoccupied.”

Orochimaru’s tone is sullen. “It’s easier to make people do things they normally oppose to if they don’t have any hope at all, yes.”

Kakashi shakes his head, and then grimaces, feeling a massive headache coming on. I bet. “What samples.”

 

There is a pause, and then Orochimaru speaks up again, tone laced through with something Kakashi cannot name. “I did not only experiment on other babies back then.”

Kakashi stares at him, and then his gaze crawls over to Tsunade, who is watching now, eyes dark.  He’s glad his voice is steady, shivers running down his spine. “What… do you mean.”

Orochimaru smiles, grimly, with glittering eyes. “I am a chimera, Hatake Kakashi. I possess both sets of genes, female and male. Both sets of organs, too, though not all are fully developed. I shift between the forms.” The white face tilts, with a smile now, that is proud and brutal. “I was allowed to do my experiments back then because they saw me as endlessly fascinating, too.”

Tsunade’s tone is caustic, echoing round the chamber. “They took eggs from you.” 

Orochimaru hums, eyes cold. “And fetuses, yes.” He swallows, something indecipherable passing over his face. “I want them back.”

 

Kakashi stares at him, her? them? trying to digest all the information. “And so…” He trails off, just looking at Orochimaru, staring beyond the image of their adversary at the hurt soul, somewhere deep beneath the surface. 

 

Orochimaru smiles, grimly. “I want a child, yes.” He spreads his arms. “The only way I know how.”

 

 

Silence. 

 

 

The click of Kakashi’s throat as he swallows is loud in the air.

 

Tsunade speaks, eventually, sounding defeated. “We will need to discuss this, you know that. And I ca…”

Orochimaru interjects, tone hard. “I offer knowledge. Acquiescence to your rules. Support if and when you need it. I will stay in whatever institution you put me in that supports my… goals.”

Kakashi shivers, and then crosses his arms, looking into the dark in the corners of the room. 

Tsunade’s voice is soft. “What if… what if the samples are gone. Were destroyed? Or tainted?”

 

Kakashi looks back at her, at them, and the image burns itself into his brain, the image of these two extremely powerful ninjas, staring at each other on opposite sides of the seal - but the connection between them is tangible nonetheless, hanging in the air, stifling and demanding.

 

 

And they look forlorn.

 

Lonely.

 

 

 

Orochimaru finally speaks, answering Tsunade’s question, tone… vulnerable. “Well, I am expecting problems. We will see. But I know that you chose the path of healing to try to shape the future. And I…”

 

He trails off, and Kakashi exhales, softly, watching a tear drop from Tsunade’s eyes. 

 

 

 

Knowing the decision has already been made.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Tsunade still looks forlorn, sitting there on her couch in the office, after.

Kakashi goes to the hidden cabinet he knows is there, pulling out the sake and two glasses without asking.

She receives the drink and throws it back, not waiting for him, and then silently asks for more. He refills her glass, also silently, and then clinks his glass with hers, for the second shot. 

His voice is soft. “To the shaping of the future then.”

Tsunade scoffs. 

 

And throws the second shot back.

 

Kakashi watches her for a moment, and then decides to pull down his mask and take a sip of alcohol without it on, leaning back on the couch. 

Tsunade refills her glass by herself this time, pulling a face, and then settles back next to him, staring unseeing past Kakashi at Konoha on the other side of the windows. 

Her voice is raw, drenched in emotions too complicated to decipher. “And here I was, thinking I knew it all.”

Kakashi grimaces, just a bit, shooting her a look. I wonder if she regrets that she never… 

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow, seemingly reading his thoughts. “You know it never really crossed my mind, after…” She clears her throat, and then shoots him a look, before her gaze wanders out the windows again. “And I do not feel the pull to have kids. Have never felt it.” Her gaze softens somewhat. “Not like Naruto obviously does, for example.”

Kakashi hums, the thought surprisingly tranquil. “Yeah, he has been very clear on that subject.”

Tsunade quirks a quick smile, there and gone again. “And yet… I envy Orochimaru right now.” She narrows her eyes, and then shakes her head, slowly. “Not… actually the fact that he will have a child…”, she snorts, pulling a face, “and he will find a way, trust me. No, it’s more…” She clicks her tongue. “The fact that he has the choice still.” She harrumphs. “I envy that.”

Kakashi nods, once. “I see.”

Tsunade inhales, deeply. “Men can decide for a much longer time. It is unfair.”

Kakashi looks away for a moment, tone careful. It is. “Could you not use the same jutsu there as well? I mean, if you would actually want…”

Tsunade hums, and then hesitates, for a long moment. “I am not sure. The cells are still old, jutsu or not. And in any case…” She trails off, and then looks down at the glass in her hands. “I spent a lot of energy in the fight against Madara. He literally tore us to shreds.” She exhales, putting one hand on her stomach. “The pools are refilling now, but I will need quite some time to do so, especially after depleting them so thoroughly just a year before.” She quirks an eyebrow. “And I will need a certain amount of it soon.”

 

Kakashi watches her, watches the emotions chase over her face.

He prompts, just softly. “For?”

Tsunade exhales, and then raises her glass, in a toast. “I’ll try to find him. As soon as you take the hat.”

A shudder of pain runs through Kakashi, pure somehow. 

His voice is breaking on the words. “You think he really… and you think you can really find him?”

Tsunade hums, and then drinks her third shot, a bit more slowly than the other two, but there is a small blush on her now, and her posture relaxes. 

She shrugs. “I don’t know. I… as I said, there was this toad, it behaved strangely. I…” She grins suddenly, her hazel eyes sparkling. “I just have this gut feeling.”

Kakashi nods, and then cackles, once. “Please.” In whatever form.

 

Tsunade’s gaze softens, and then she relaxes a bit, propping her head up on her right arm. “So. Thunder in the distance?”

Kakashi snorts, and then shakes his head, looking away for long moment. “I…” He shrugs. “I cannot quite name it. The pressure of it is gone?” He looks back at her, his voice dropping to a whisper. “The frantic and fearful anticipation is gone. The dread. The anxious anger.” He clears his throat. “I honestly had thought it would be so different? And I had dreaded that, too?” He blinks, looking down at his glass for a long moment, his voice sounding faraway. “Why is it like this? I mean, why isn’t it this…” He trails off.

Tsunade looks at him for a long moment, and then hums, leaning forward to refill their glasses. 

Continuing his thought. “Why isn’t it compulsory for you? Why is it so much more sedate than you anticipated?”

Kakashi nods, silently. 

Tsunade inhales, deeply, and then clicks her tongue. “I think it is because you have already transcended that stage of love.”

Kakashi frowns, and then looks at her, tilting his head. “Transcended that stage of love?”

Tsunade grins at him, teeth flashing. “Kakashi, you have fought this, helplessly, for over, hmm, pretty much exactly 17 years now. It’s dragged you through literally aaaaaall the emotions.” She shrugs, doing a bit of a sweeping gesture with her glass in her hand. “And you have gone and accepted that you love him, and that you will need to wait still and have him make his own experiences, for a while now, too.” She points a finger. “You have accepted that he is with Sasuke now, because you know he loves Sasuke. And because you love Sasuke, too.” She smirks. “Not in the same way, but you love him nonetheless.”

Kakashi blinks, looking away for a moment. He shrugs. “Still. I had anticipated something different.” Very different. He pauses, for a moment. “And there was this moment, of pure devastation, there on that battle field.” If that had persisted…

Tsunade hums, her eyes seeing too much. “But it was dampened, was it not? By him? Minato, I mean?”

Kakashi shivers, and then sniffs. “You saw?”

Tsunade’s little smirk is sly. “Yes. And I saw you blush, heavily, at Kushina’s suggestion. And Obito was there, then, as well, was he not.”

Kakashi clears his throat, feeling a blush creep up now, too. “Yeah, well…” He frowns, shakings head once. “But I don’t understand…”

 

Tsunade hums, and then smiles, gently. “Think about it. The bond, and the visual and touchable and tangible representation of it, the tattoo, both react to emotions. So does the sharingan, but let’s stay on the bond now. Not only were you strong enough, accepting enough, to let Naruto go then, when it engaged, the moment was also shaped by Minato being there, and Obito, for you. Two loves you thought you had lost, there for you. Three, if you count Kushina, too. Offering their love, and support. And acceptance. It shaped the bond, when it engaged.”

Kakashi sniffs, the world blurring for a moment, as a tear drops. “And so…” He trails off, not knowing how to put it into words.

Tsunade’s expression is kind. Her tone is soft, too soft. Wounding. “For the first time, in your life, Kakashi, most of your grief is gone, isn’t it. The mourning? You even know your father is alright, even your mother, and will be there for you, eventually.” 

Kakashi shivers, and then looks away, raising his glass and emptying it without feeling the burn. 

Tsunade hums, watching him intently. “And, of course, the absence of this grief… it spills out.” She hesitates, for a long moment. “It must be that way for Naruto, too.” She tilts her head, tone sly. “How was he this morning?”

Kakashi cackles, and then exhales, shudderingly. “Playful. Pushing.” He swallows, his throat clicking. “But then again he’s been pushing ever since…” He breaks off, blushing a bit.

Tsunade grins. “So, when was that first kiss.”

Kakashi grimaces, tone flat. “I’m not drunk enough for that conversation.”

Tsunade giggles, and reaches for the bottle. “Oh, by all means, Kakashi, lets remedy that.”

Kakashi grunts, shooting a look at the clock. “But it’s only… 9 am?” He grimaces, and then laughs, with a shake of his head. “And I only had two fingers full of cake?”

Tsunade frowns, and then grins. “Fingers full?”

Kakashi grunts, looking down into his glass. “I brought him a birthday cake. He climbed onto my lap in front of Sasuke and fed me fingers full of it.”

“Ohhhhhhhh.” Tsunade’s eyes sparkle. She points her fingers, cackling. “All of it. Now. I’m listening.”

 

Kakashi snorts, and then settles more comfortably, and then returns her grin, his stomach fluttering. And he sighs. ”Alright.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

He’s still a bit tipsy, an hour later, wandering through Konoha, though Tsunade had used her skills to make the most of the inebriation disappear again, after their little talk.

 

Which had been so incredibly freeing it still makes Kakashi feel lighter than air.

 

And that is what acceptance and friends and love will give you. 

 

And of course the love itself.

 

The love that is rushing through him right now, lifting him up. 

Despite the fact that nothing really happened.

 

But that’s not true, is it. What happened this morning was of the utmost importance. 

Naruto has confirmed the bond, and Sasuke has not only acknowledged, but accepted it’s existence, too. Its outlook. And there’s this… 

 

He smirks softly to himself, and then lets the last thought go, the memory of that situation something he knows he will dwell on many a night, but now… might not be the best moment. 

Especially to remember the feeling of Naruto’s body on his. 

Or the feeling of his lips.

 

Kakashi clears his throat, dragging his mind away from the memory, with an effort, smiling an eye-smile at the people he’s passing.

 

 

The people that are trying.

 

Kakashi can see it in the faces of literally everyone.

He exhales, and then turns his feet towards the mountain, to check on the shelters.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He watches Konohamaru doze off for a moment, hidden behind the open door of the room serving as a class room, Iruka’s lesson on tactics apparently not too well received by the kids.

 

He frowns, letting his gaze drift over the children, a lot of the gazes vacant. Some of the kids are doodling, too, obviously not listening. He shifts, to look at Iruka, wondering for a moment why he lets this obvious inattentiveness slide… and frowns, deeply, when he sees Iruka wear the same flat expression. A forlorn expression.

 

Kakashi presses his lips together, the thought glum.

This is bad. We need to raise everyone’s spirits, and soon. 

 

He clears his throat, and then enters the makeshift classroom, giving a careful eye-smile to the kids, whose spirit does rise a bit, with excitement and whispers, when he enters the room.

Konohamaru pipes up, almost chipper. “Kakashi-san!” He blinks, and then hops a bit in his seat. “Oh, oh, is it okay if we call you Rokudaime now? Should we?”

Kakashi freezes, mid-step, shooting him a bit of a skunk-eye, while seeing a quick, but small smile flit over Iruka’s face. He sighs, softly. “No, not… yet.”

More excited whispers, and Kakashi sighs, soundlessly, turning to Iruka.

He shrugs. “I’m sorry for interrupting your lesson.”

Iruka quirks an eyebrow, quite aware that he must have done it on purpose, tone carrying a tease. “Ah well, how could we possibly be upset about the future Hokage visiting us?”

Kakashi narrows his eyes at him, and Iruka grins, some of the gloominess in his eyes vanishing, and then nods at the class. “Early, and slightly longer break.”

Muegi, Konohamaru’s friend, pulls a face, and Konohamaru speaks up, shooting a look around the class. “But Sensei, we want to know what happened?” He pulls a face. “I mean, we could hear some explosions, even here? What… happened?” He spreads his hands. “And when people came back the other day they were so quiet, just like…” He trails off, and Kakashi looks at him, for a long second, before shooting a look at Iruka, who nods after a moment. 

 

Kakashi pulls out a chair, and settles on it, legs crossed. He spreads his hands. “Alright. Shoot.” He holds up a finger as dozens of hands shoot up, immediately. “However, some things I cannot talk about. I’m sure you understand.”

Konohamaru rolls his eyes, and Kakashi grins to himself, nodding at Muegi. “What do you want to know?”

Muegi blinks at him, eyes huge. “Who did you fight?”

“Ahhh…” Kakashi blinks. “That is actually quite difficult to answer, because the enemy… changed.”

Muegi frowns, while the kids stare, whispering. “Changed?”

Kakashi clears his throat, wondering what he can tell. But Obito and Kaguya are here, are they not? They will encounter them soon anyways. Or hear of them. And Minato, and Kushina. They’ll hear lots of stories. Better to hear them from me, than half-truths from others. 

He frowns, collecting his thoughts. “Well, at first we thought we would fight the one claiming to be Madara. However it turned out to be Uchiha Obito, who is now under arrest.” He hesitates, feeling Iruka shift to lean at a wall, off to the side, obviously wanting to see Kakashi’s face, and then continues, with a sigh. “There were a lot of reanimated enemies, one of which was said Uchiha Madara.” A murmur passes through the room, and Kakashi chuckles, watching the eyes of the children light up with excitement. If nothing else, this is good for their spirits. “Yes, that Madara.” He hums. “And yes, he was very difficult to defeat. Actually only Sensei Guy managed, by opening all gates.”

 

Another murmur, and Kakashi gives them a careful eye-smile. “No worries, he is not dead.” He hesitates, and then continues, knowing any skills will become known anyways, sooner or later. And Sasuke’s eyes exist, for all to see. “Actually Naruto managed to save him. Naruto received a part of every bijou’s chakra during the fight, and that led to some kind of chakra memory opening. He received healing powers, “, and other skills, “while Sasuke received the full rinnegan.”

Muegi stares at him, and then pouts. “Sakura-san got nothing?”

Kakashi chuckles, and then leans forward a bit, waggling his eyebrows. “Actually she did. She managed to defeat the final enemy during the end fight… she absorbed its powers. We will have to evaluate what she can do with them.”

Another boy speaks up, the black eyes huge. “The final enemy?”

Kakashi nods. “Yes. It turned out that… both Obito and Madara were only used, in order to resurrect Otsutsuki Kaguya.” He shrugs. “You will probably see her around. She…” Seems to be an alien. “She is a foreigner, and she looks and sounds quite different than us. Her powers were sealed by the Yondaime. And despite her being the final enemy… we were able to come to a solution. In a way.”

 

Silence, as the word sinks in.

Kakashi can feel Iruka’s gaze.

 

Konohamaru whispers finally, loud in the quiet room. “The Yondaime?”

Kakashi nods, and then exhales, with a shake of his head. “In order to… be allowed to live, our enemy…“ He hesitates, remembering Orochimaru earlier, and adjusting his wording. “Our enemies exchanged the right to live with their skills and knowledge. The Yondaime and his wife, Uzumaki Kushina were both there at the end, in a reanimated state. Kaguya revived their cells, for a while.” He tilts his head, with a click of his tongue. “They will stay with us, for a few years, likely.”

 

He hesitates, and then locks his gaze with Konohamaru, tone soft. “Other reanimated kages were there, too, but they chose to release to the beyond instead.” He hesitates, and then adds, with another eye-smile. “Hashirama-sama, Tobirama-sama and…”, he hesitates, for a split second, but continues, a bit forcedly, “Hiruzen-sama all decided to leave the future to us.”

He can see Konohamaru inhale deeply, but nod to himself and Kakashi nods, too, and then lets his gaze drift over the kids, who are all staring at him now, in awe. 

He nods once, tone firm. “It is yours to shape.”

 

From the corner of his eyes he can see Iruka sniff, and then smile, broadly, for a moment.

 

There is a long moment, and then a girl speaks up, her green eyes and ash-blonde hair giving her a bit of a fairy aura. “Why can I see both of your eyes? Didn’t you always cover the sharingan?”

Kakashi blinks, and then reaches up, to touch the skin under his left eye. 

He chuckles. “Oh, right.” He drops the hand again, shrugging. “I… had to give it back.” He can feel Iruka’s attention, like a welcome weight. “And during the fight, Madara took the other.” A whisper passed through the room.

The girl's hands fly up to cover her mouth. “But you would be blind then?”

Kakashi nods, and then shrugs again. “And I was.” He grins at her. “Remember when I told you Naruto got healing powers?” He leans forward, with a conspirational whisper. “He created these new eyes for me.”

A louder whisper this time, and a ‘cool’ exclamation, from someone.

Udon pipes up, blinking owlishly. “Are they sharingans?”

Kakashi laughs, and then shakes his head. “I… do not know.” He raises his eyebrows. “Apparently I am supposed to reawaken them, so we’ll see, I guess?”

He can see Iruka frown, while the kids whisper excitedly among themselves.

 

The blond girl pipes up once more, for a second seeming much older. “Do you know who sent us the dream?”

Sudden silence, as all the kids look at her, and then look away.

Kakashi lets his gaze drift over them. “The dream?” 

The girl nods. “Yes, I mean, we all dreamed?” She hesitates, and then shoots a look around, and then blushes, softly. “I know we all dreamed different things, but it was so…” She trails off.

Kakashi nods, and then sighs, leaning forward, with his elbows on his knees, hands clasped. 

 

He keeps his voice gentle. “Well, I did not dream, for that happened during the last phase.” He hesitates, and then continues, letting his gaze travel from one kid to the next, carefully locking his gaze with each of them. “But I know that the dream, whatever you actually dreamed… was perfect. I know that the memory of it comes with a longing to return. I know that it is hard to forget.” He frowns, and then makes his tone just a bit more imploring. “But I also know that it was a jutsu cast by the enemy. A jutsu meant to control.” He smiles softly, carefully infusing his tone with humor now. “I know that as far as jutsus go this one was quite nice though, wasn’t it?” 

A few small chuckles, though most of the kids stay silent. 

He presses his lips together, and continues, softly, but firmly. “If the dream would have continued, you would have died. So my advice is… remember it. You are young, so you might even try to create it, if you can. The dream showed you your perfect world. Maybe… we can create it, together?”

The girl’s eyes fill with tears, and her voice is wobbly. “You mean, I could be a Sannin, too?”

Kakashi blinks, and then chuckles, and stands up, walking over to her, and kneeling down next to her. He reaches out and offers his hand, clasping hers gently when she takes it. 

He raises his eyebrows. “You can be the Sannin if you really want it.”

He lets his gaze drift over the children. “It is hard work first, and luck later, which makes you strong ninjas. Or kunoichis.”

The girl sniffs. “Even Naruto?”

Kakashi chuckles, and then shakes her hand, just a bit. “What is your name?”

The girl blushes, averting her gaze, for a moment. “Midori.”

Kakashi hums. “Midori-san. Yes, even Naruto only got where he is now through hard work. Hard work, and pain, and injury, and determination, and stubbornness.” He tilts his head. “And luck.” Or fate. Whatever you want to call it.

Midori snickers. 

Kakashi grins at her. “No, really, of course there is always luck involved.” He hesitates. “But there’s always people involved, too, people that inspire you. People that make you want to work harder for your goals. Friends are just as important for your journey as the goal itself.”

Another boy pipes up, a bit hesitantly. “Like Uchiha Sasuke? I heard that Naruto chas…” He breaks off, blushing furiously.

Kakashi hums, squeezing Midori’s hand before letting it go and standing up again. He wonders for a moment at the lack of pain. “Yes, for example like Naruto and Sasuke. Or Guy and me. A rival is good for your career.” He hesitates, and then turns to shoot a look at Iruka. “But friends are necessary for your life.” He raises his eyebrows. “If you’re lucky they can be both, or more.”

Iruka smirks, softly.

 

Kakashi steps to the front of the classroom again, slowly.

Spreading his hands. “Any more questions?”

 

Konohamaru speaks up, blinking. “What happens now?”

 

Kakashi hesitates, and then shrugs, with a chuckle. “I do not know.” He spreads his hands. “And isn’t that exciting?”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi inhales, deeply, sinking gratefully into the embrace, in a dark storage room somewhere. He mumbles into Iruka’s hair. “You still use the same shampoo.”

Iruka chuckles, one hand stroking softly along Kakashi’s back. “Well, I’m set in my ways.” He hums, tightening his arms around Kakashi’s waist. “I’m so glad you’re back.”

Kakashi squeezes back, and then withdraws, just a bit, to look at him. “I’m so relieved you’re safe.” He shakes his head once. “I’m actually extremely relieved at how… it turned out. There were losses, of course, but…”

Iruka hums, watching him intently in the gloom of the light falling in from beneath the door. “Only a few dozen, over the whole army, from what I heard. You did so well?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “Naruto and Sasuke and Sakura did so well.” He sniffs, and then cackles. “The kages did so well?” He raises his eyebrows, whispering loudly. “Hashirama kissed Madara before releasing. Can you imagine? We all just…” He snorts, and then blushes, heavily. And clears his throat.

Iruka prompts, with narrowed eyes. And a grin. “What.”

Kakashi shifts to his other foot. “Nothing?”

Iruka snorts. “Uh huh.” He raises his eyebrows. “Spill.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. “The bond engaged, but we… kinda postponed it for now. And we both know it. And… when Obito came over to our side, and when Minato and Kushina were revived…” He snorts, and shakes his head. “I have literally no idea what happened there, but Obito asked her for permission, and she just said yes, and he went and kissed Minato, right there, right in front of us, and then he turned and kissed me??” 

He shakes his head, a bit wildly. “I mean… the fuck?”

Iruka stares at him, and then snorts, and cackles. “Was Naruto there?”

Kakashi nods, with a chuckle of his own. “Yeah. If I remember correctly, he also said ‘the fuck’.”

Iruka laughs out, loudly, and then presses a hand over his mouth. “Oh damn, I would have loved to see that.” He sobers, slowly, the eyes black in the low light. “How do you feel, Kaka-kun.”

Kakashi shrugs, and then sighs. “I don’t know. Relieved is probably most of it.” He hesitates, wondering if he should tell of Obito coming to him on the way back but dismisses the thought, smirking softly. “And I feel anticipation.” He looks away for a moment. “The future is wide open. Change is approaching. And they’re here?”

Iruka smirks at him, and Kakashi smiles, wobbly suddenly, tears falling freely. 

He inhales, shakingly. “In my wildest dreams, Iru-kun, I would not have anticipated this outcome. To see them again. Speak to them again. Feel them again.” He sniffs, looking away for a moment, and then looks back at Iruka. “I’m sorry that your parents are not here again, too.”

A shiver of pain passes over Iruka’s face, but he shakes his head. “Well, neither are yours, nor Konohamaru’s, nor lots of other people’s…” Iruka sighs, and then shrugs. “And we cannot stay in the past when we want to change the future, right?”

He leans in, and hugs Kakashi once more, quickly. “But you know, I am happy for Naruto. Truly. He deserves this. I mean… we both have some memories of our parents at least, right? If I understand you correctly this is a certain amount of time, only… let him have this. Experience this.”

Kakashi nods, and then quips, gently. “Yeah. And, I mean, Kushina didn’t kill me, so…”

Iruka laughs out at that, reaching up to draw his fingers through Kakashi’s hair. “I never doubted it.” Iruka drops his hand, and then looks at Kakashi. “Will you introduce me? Or should I ask Naruto?”

Kakashi hums, shaking his head. “You can, of course, but I will happily take you along later?” He hesitates, and then shrugs. “Would you like to meet Obito, too?”

Iruka tilts his head, with a vaguely pained grin. “Ohhhhh, definitely.”

 

Kakashi narrows his eyes, watching Iruka for a moment, watching him fidget.

Right. There’s history for you with Obito, too. How could I forget.

 

He sighs. “Alright.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

He finds himself close to the Hyuuga complex, later, after having been shooed out of the shelters again, by a broadly grinning Iruka, who had made Kakashi promise to ‘pick me up when you take Obito for dinner, promise me’.

To which Kakashi had said yes, of course, but he had also pointed out that he might need to talk to Obito first. Iruka had just waggled his eyebrows, with a sly smile. “That’s why I said dinner.”

 

 

Kakashi smirks to himself, looking up at the gate of the rebuilt complex, noting the sturdy and practical set up. Looks like Lee and Tenten did an exemplary job. He pushes the door open, just a bit, shooting a look at the courtyard.

The lone tree still stands, albeit a bit crooked, and for a moment Kakashi can see Asuma there, with Kurenai watching. He frowns, remembering hearing someone say that Asuma had been sealed again at one of the beaches. By his team.

I need to go and talk to them, too. And Kurenai. I bet their dreams were heartbreaking.

He sniffs, and then enters, quietly, smiling when Neji appears from somewhere, like a ghost.

“Kakashi-san.” They share a quick smile. Neji’s lilac eyes sparkle. “Another round, to check the troops?”

Kakashi nods, and then shrugs, amending gently. “Another round, to check on friends and colleagues.” He hesitates. “I know these days and the dream were not easy to digest.”

Neji hums, and then nods, voice quiet. “Especially the dream, yes.”

 

There’s a whisper of sound, and then Hinata speaks up, behind them. “It was a beautiful dream.”

Kakashi nods, turning to her. “Hinata-san. So I heard.” He blinks, wondering for a second what she might have dreamt. “How do you feel now?”

Hinata clasps her hands, looking away for a moment. Her long black hair is shifting in the breeze. Kakashi distantly notes that she seems to have adapted the short-sleeved and rather impractical traditional Hyuuga-armor with a long sleeved black vest with a high collar over it looking warm, and making her look regal. 

Her voice is soft, but firm. “I am glad I am awake again. I mourn the dream… but…” She blinks, her eye steady on his. “But I know that it was indeed a dream, since you are the one Naruto will be with.”

Kakashi blinks, and then refuses to blush. “You… know?”

 

Neji clicks his tongue, answering for her, when she hesitates. “We kept looking at the battlefield with the byakugan active. We... saw.” 

Kakashi frowns, not understanding. “What did you see?”

Hinata answers, whispering. “Naruto’s expression when he gave you your eyes back.” She hesitates. “He never looked at me that way. I mean, we suspected you like him, I mean, we even told you, but then… we knew it was more than that.” 

Oh. Kakashi clears his throat, blushing a bit, after all. “I see.” He hesitates, and then nods, forcing himself to say the words. Knowing that the knowledge will be all over town by nightfall, likely. Not that he thinks Neji and Hinata are gossips, but… But Hinata will probably talk to Sakura about it, and Neji might talk to Genma. Or Shikamaru. And Sakura will maybe talk to Ino and from there it’ll be everywhere. He sighs. Not that I blame them. As rare as a bond like this is, it’s something too interesting not to share. “Yes. We are bonded.” 

Silence as both Hyuuga stare at him.

Kakashi clears his throat, feeling pinned. “I have known, for years, but of course he had…” He shakes his head. “He still has to grow up, and I am happy with him being with Sasuke now.” And that’s even the truth, by now at least. He snorts, smiling a bit self-deprecatingly. “I think I wasn’t always able to hide it though.”

 

Hinata blinks at him, and then smirks, softly. “Congratulations, Sensei.”

Kakashi stares at her. “I… thank you?”

Neji speaks up, gently. “Love is not always found where we suspect it is. Or even hope for it to be.”

Kakashi blinks and then turns to him.

Neji smirks. “I talked to Sakura.”

Kakashi nods. “Ah.” He hesitates and then prompts. “And?”

Neji blushes, sharing a quick look with Hinata, who is grinning now. 

Neji clears his throat. “And I think I really like Karin.”

Kakashi chuckles, softly, and then leans in, just a bit. “I really think she likes you, too.”

Neji nods, and then grins, suddenly. “We want to go to Uzushiogakure together. I know you talked with her and Suigetsu about that?”

Hinata pipes up, excitement in her tone. “Hanabi wishes to go as well. We have discussed a trip to a few of the allied villages, for education and training. She is currently with our father in the outskirts, training the ‘ten palms’, but I believe it would be good for her?”

Kakashi nods, and then shrugs. “Honestly, that is a great idea. And I think it would be good for Naruto and Kushina, too. But… in regards to Karin, we might need to wait a bit, okay? She was an accomplice of Orochimaru after all. Things… need to settle first. Rebuild.” He hesitates, and then adds, slowly. “A lot of things are in motion. We need to carefully let them slip into place before we push at them again.” He clicks his tongue, tone dry. “Please.”

Hinata snickers.

Neji smirks at him, and then shuffles his feet a bit, ducking his head. “But the fact itself…?”

Kakashi frowns. “The fact that you want to go to Uzushiogakure or that you like Karin?”

Neji grimaces, and then clears his throat. “Both?”

Kakashi grins at him, watching Neji glow. “Both make me very happy.”

 

 

 

Very.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Knocking on a door knowing it will be Obito who will open it is… weird.

 

Kakashi watches himself knock, after having nodded at the guards, who stand bored at the edge of the seal that’s been placed around the house. 

 

It’s even more weird actually seeing Obito open the door.

Kakashi stares at him, probably a moment too long.

 

 

Obito clears his throat eventually, stepping aside and extending his arm, to allow Kakashi inside. 

Watches him toe off his shoes, when he does. 

 

Obito goes ahead, into the small living room, and then turns to Kakashi, with a nod at the small kitchen. “Tea?”

Kakashi nods. “Please.”

He hesitates, and then settles on the couch, watching Obito go through the motions. The atmosphere between them is surreal, tranquil and yet charged somehow, filled to the brim with anticipation. 

 

And hope.

And memory. 

 

Recent memory, too. 

 

Kakashi clears his throat, eventually. “Today is Naruto’s birthday.”

Obito looks up, while waiting for the water to boil. “Oh?”

Kakashi nods. “I brought him a cake.”

Obito grins, the scars on his face twisting a bit with it. “Cake?”

Kakashi nods, with an exhale. “Yeah. He fed me mouthfuls of it with his fingers.”

Obito snorts, pouring the water. “I see.” Their eyes meet, for a split second. Obito clears his throat. “You’re the one with the mask now.”

Kakashi frowns. “Guess I am.” 

Obito comes over, putting the small tablet with their tea on the low table between them. He sighs, and then settles next to Kakashi, the space between them tangible somehow.

Kakashi stares at the steam, rising from the teapot.

 

Obito speaks up again, after a while. “It is weird, isn’t it. Being, here, now.” His voice drops to a whisper. “Just being, actually.”

Kakashi nods, clearing his throat. Shifting just slightly, so he can look at Obito from the corner of his eyes. “How does it feel, now? Does it feel different?”

Obito shrugs, staring unseeing into space for a moment. “Ahhh, no, and yes.” He grimaces. “I still do not need nourishment anymore, but…” He tilts his head. “I taste the tea again. And an apple smelled really good so I took a small bite…” He hesitates, with a frown. “I don’t think I need food. But I think I can taste it again.” He chuckles, eyes returning to Kakashi’s. “As you know.“ Kakashi swallows, but holds the gaze. Obito blinks, continuing. “And I think my flesh heals at a normal rate now… I bruised my toe earlier when I stumbled out of bed. That’s something else, too. I’m… heavier.”

Kakashi nods, fidgeting for a moment. “So, want to go for dinner later? With Iruka and me? Taste something else?”

Obito stares at him, and then quirks an eyebrow. “Iruka?”

Kakashi looks at him, with an exhale. “Yeah, Umino Iruka. We’re… friends. Old friends.”

Obito blinks, eyes flitting back and forth. “Sure. I mean, I have nothing else planned.”

Kakashi nods, clearing his throat again. “Right. Though, I mean, we both know that you could disappear if you so wanted, so…” 

Obito stares at him, for a long moment. 

His voice is toneless when he finally speaks, eyes unseeing once more. “And… where would I go, Kakashi? Hmm? All my longing… all my hopes and dreams are here now.” He swallows. “What’s left of it at least.”

Kakashi swallows as well, watching the deep pain on Obito’s face. 

He closes his eyes for a moment. “About that… what was that on the battlefield?” He clicks his tongue. “I mean, there, at the end.” He hesitates. “And, during the night?”

Obito’s dark eyes come back up to his. They shiver down into Kakashi’s gut. “You mean when I kissed you? And when I came to you?”

Kakashi swallows. “Yeah… and when you kissed Minato, I mean…” He trails off, fighting the blush.

Obito ducks his head, just a bit. There’s a breathless chuckle in his voice. “Oh yeah, that…” He blinks, raising his eyebrows. “I remembered something. Something long ago.”

Kakashi stares at him, at the faint, one-sided blush. Catching on, somehow. “You kissed him before.”

Obito leans in, waggling his eyebrows. Biting his lips. “More than that.”

Kakashi stares at him, open-mouthed. “You didn’t.”

Obito starts to laugh, deeply, eyes sparkling. And blushing, hard. “I so did.”

Kakashi gasps, staring at him wide-eyed. “I… when???”

Obito leans in even further, voice a conspirational whisper. “Do you remember when he went missing back then? Somewhere in Amegakure?”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, after a moment. 

Obito shrugs. “Well, I had this bad habit of watching you all the time you know? Madara was furious at me, but I…” He hesitates, with a shrug. “I couldn’t resist. I wasn’t fully healed, and I should not have been out, but…” He sniffs. “I saved him back then, took him back to our hideout, he had a wound poisoned by Hanzu’s salamander. Madara took care of the poison, but we didn’t have any means to get his body temperature back up, and Minato was too cold, and so…”

Kakashi stares at him, from close distance, for so long that Obito starts to fidget. 

 

Kakashi’s tone is beyond dry, laced through and through with humor… and breathless arousal. “You mean to tell me, that you used the oldest trope in the fucking world to get our Sensei into bed, and that he consented to sex with you?”

Obito bites his lips, and then leans in even more, whispering. “He consented to sex with us both.”

 

Kakashi stares, mind flatlined. 

Obito’s eyes are huge on his, a darkness in them that speaks volumes.

 

Obito leans in, eventually, whispering against Kakashi’s left ear. “Madara was really good in bed, you know… I’m not sure if Minato had ever been taken before, but he sure as hell enjoyed himself between us.”

Kakashi mewls, deep down in his throat. 

Obito chuckles. “Maybe we could ask him for an encore… with you and me?”

Fuck. Kakashi squeezes his eyes closed, willing his instant hard-on down. His tone is gruff. “Stop it, Obito.”

Obito withdraws a bit, eyes flashing. “Yeah? Why?”

Kakashi glowers at him. “You know why. That night was an exception.”

Obito frowns. “But your soul-mate is still in another relationship. Don’t tell me you plan to stay celibate forever?”

Kakashi exhales, deliberately. “It won’t be forever.” He narrows his eyes, tone deliberately light to take the sting out. “Is that why you came to me? Because you pity me?”

Obito rolls his eyes. “Of course not.” He shakes his head. “Bakakashi.” He shifts, and then moves in a bit, suddenly very close. “I do not pity you. I envy you. Not for the complicated bond, but for the bond itself. Someone you can love, so deeply… such a gift.”

Kakashi blinks at him, the words coming by themselves. “I love you, too… and I don’t know what to do with that.”

Obito’s eyes fill with tears, and he sniffs, with a broken smile. “I know. I have your memories now, remember.” The smile broadens, tremblingly. “Love has this power to heal… but also to break.” He frowns, eyes faraway for a moment. “It broke Madara, at some point.”

Kakashi watches him, feeling like bursting. He sniffs. “Madara broke because he loved?”

Obito nods, with a quirk of his eyebrow. “He loved Hashirama so deeply… it clashed with his own beliefs in regards to the village. In regards to his goals. It tore at him, for years. They loved, and clashed, and made up, and clashed again. When Hashirama finally killed or thought he‘d killed him… and then put him in a hidden grave… I think Madara thought that love shifted to hate.” Obito pauses, with a frown. “I think he wanted to resurrect Hashirama, too. But not with Edo-Tensei, but with the Samsara of Heavenly Life. It’s why he wanted his own eyes back, or the fruit.” Obito sniffs, and then shrugs. “The attack back then… I mean when Naruto was born…”

 

Kakashi frowns, prompting. “Why did you attack Konoha back then. I mean…”

Obito sighs, and then shrugs. “You know I was sent. I was sent to distract.”

Kakashi frowns. “Distract.”

Obito grimaces, and then reaches up, to wipe a tear away. “Yeah, he… so Orochimaru used to do these experiments, right? With Hashirama’s cells?”

Kakashi stares at him, unblinking.

Obito grimaces, looking away for a moment. He clicks his tongue. “Have you never wondered where all those cells came from?”

Kakashi closes his eyes, the words toneless. “Son of a bitch.”

Obito cackles. “Yeah, well, Madara dragged himself out of his cave, and took Hashirama’s body with him, that night. They had kept it preserved, well, for the most part. Of course at that point Orochimaru had already been forced to stop, so it was just floating there, if I understood that correctly.”

Kakashi exhales, shudderingly, and then reopens his eyes, unseeing. “So, where is Senju Hashirama’s body now?”

Obito pulls a face. “Madara integrated it into the weird gedo statue in our cave… it literally fed and created the white zetsus.”

Kakashi grimaces, and then shakes his head, following the implications. “That is why Orochimaru had samples of Hashirama and Tobirama, right. But the sample of Minato he had did not suffice, back then in the fight with the Sandaime.”

Obito nods, with a sigh. “Yeah, but of course he could easily discern what he would need, then. That Kabuto learned the jutsu from him, after.”

Kakashi blinks. Right, Kabuto. We still have to find him. 

He nods, once. “And… why did you help kill your clan?”

 

Obito cackles, the sound devoid of any humor. “Well, that was the second time Madara dragged himself out. Or was dragged out, as he was probably moved by that black Zetsu? I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. Madara wanted access to the Uchiha shrine, and he wanted all other sharingan users gone. Probably because he didn’t want to take any risks in regards to the jutsu. Or it didn’t want to take any risks.” Obito hesitates, his voice breaking when he continues. “While I… was killing relatives he did something to that slab of stone. I later saw gravel and dust on his clothes.”

Kakashi shakes his head, once. “So much death, and pain, and decades worth of manipulation… it is no wonder it all did not make sense at the time. Kaguya’s resurrection had been planned for hundreds of years.”

Obito sniffs, quirking a brow. “And we just…” He trails off.

Kakashi inhales, deeply, and then locks his eyes with Obito’s. 

Stating, without anger. “And you betrayed me. Us. Even before all that.”

Obito looks away, lip quivering. “He manipulated the situation so it would seem like you killed her.” He snorts, cackling. “And it was so cleverly done, too… To sever my ties with you, while at the same time release the three-tails and trigger my Mangekyo.” He exhales, shudderingly. “A part of me misses the seal, you know. The guilt is eating at me.”

Kakashi nods, understanding all too well. “I can imagine.” He clears his throat. “That is why you wanted to sacrifice yourself, right…? There, on the battlefield, when you wanted to take Kaguya away by yourself. And you only aimed to only wound me, not kill me.” And you kissed that scar, reverently, when you came to me. 

Obito ducks his head, with a bit of a smirk. “You noticed.”

Kakashi cackles, and then sniffs. “I now have a cross of scars, over my heart.”

Obito exhales. “X marks the spot.” He sniffs, nodding again. “Your heart was always your greatest weapon, Kakashi, whether you tried to hide it, or not. Seeing you there, on that cemetery, one day after the other pulled me in, bit by bit, whether I wanted it, or not.”

Kakashi swallows, whispering. “I haven’t been, today.”

Obito hums. “And why would you. No-one you mourned is there.” His voice drops to a whisper. "But you came to me nonetheless.“

Kakashi sniffs, and then shakes his head. “There are others I mourn, who are there. But…”

Obito smiles, sadly. “Now you know that not even she is there. Right?”

Kakashi nods, mutely.

Obito reaches up, to wipe at his eyes. “I… I can take you, at some point. I put her close to a small stream, with lots of flowers stretching towards the sun. She would have adored it.”

Kakashi nods again, his voice raw. “I’d love that.”

 

Obito blinks up at him, eyes huge. His voice is a broken whisper. “I’m so glad to be back.”

 

And Kakashi nods, wildly, while reaching out to hug Obito to himself, clinging to him as if drowning. “So am I.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

It is afternoon already when he finally leaves Obito again, the time having flown by as they had talked, a lot more easily after that hug.

 

The air had been charged though, still.

 

Kakashi grins to himself, and then turns towards the playground, shooting a look up at the sun. Admitting to himself. And you like it, that he obviously desires you. And of course the prospect of him and you and Minato… 

Kakashi stops his own thought, blushing deeply. 

 

He slows his steps when he gets close, observing the people on the playground for a moment, the  playground obviously rebuilt recently, and somewhat basic, but there’s laughter from the kids, and chatter from the parents.

Kakashi lets his eyes drift over them, and then smirks, softly, seeing Tenzou sit in a circle of small kids, while little pink flowers and twigs pop up from the ground. The children reach for them, plucking the flowers, and trying to catch the twigs, squealing and laughing.

Kakashi chuckles, and then steps closer, slowly, holding up his hand when Tenzou looks up, indicating for him to continue. He shoots a look at Yugao, who is sitting on a bench nearby, and then steps over, inclining his head. “May I?”

Yugao smirks at him. “Of course, Senpai.”

Kakashi nods, and then sits down, watching Tenzou pop up more flowers and twigs for a moment. With white and yellow petals, this time. His voice is soft. “How are you?”

Yugao sniffs, and then picks at a non-existent fluff on her pants. “Better, now that he’s back.” She frowns. “That dream… it really was beautiful. But when I think about the fact that Aiko was also in that cocoon, alone…” She breaks off, her lip quivering.

Kakashi sniffs. “Yeah.” He swallows his throat clicking. “I’m glad it turned out the way it did.” He looks at her, utterly sincere. “I’m sorry though that we could not bring him back, too.”

Yugao nods, and then smiles, broadly, though her voice shivers. “Ah, you know Hayate, Senpai. I bet he would have refused to be revived, now that Tenzou is Aiko’s Dad… I mean, she doesn’t even know him. And you told me he was at peace in the afterlife, what more is there to wish for, in this situation.”

Kakashi nods, and then exhales. “Thanks.”

 

A shadow falls over them, and Kakashi looks up at Tenzou, who nods at him. “Senpai?”

Kakashi exhales, standing up. “I’m sorry, I did not wish to distract you.”

Tenzou shakes his head, and then gestures towards the path, with a quick look at Yugao, who is moving over to Aiko in his stead. “Ah, no worries, Senpai, the children found some beetles they found fascinating. Apparently even flowers get boring after a while.”

Kakashi chuckles, and then steps over, lowering his voice. “I know we haven’t talked properly yet, and now probably isn’t the time, but I want you to know that it was not in my hands to go and look for you. I was very relieved when I saw a huge wooden structure on the battlefield.”

Tenzou snorts, and then nods, his posture relaxing a bit. “Thank you, Senpai.” He frowns, his dark eyes searching Kakashi’s for a long moment. “I really appreciate it. I…” He grimaces. “I mean, I knew there were other things going on, and I knew you wouldn’t forget about me…”

Kakashi interjects, tone firm. “Never.”

Tenzou grins, for a split second, and then ducks his head. “Yeah, well, thanks, Kakashi.” He grimaces. “Though I have to apologize, since Kabuto took the hiraishin kunai from me.”

Kakashi exhales, and rolls his shoulders, swallowing harshly. “Yeah, well, don’t worry.” He clears his throat. “Because, actually, that is also why I need to talk to you now. I need to know where you were when you tried to track and encountered Kabuto. Because Anko is not back yet. And if Kabuto still has the kunai…”

Tenzou stares at him, and then something in his face sets. “I’m ready.”

Kakashi tilts his head, with a look back at Yugao and Aiko. “Sure?”

 

Tenzou quirks an eyebrow. “What a father would I be if I abandoned my colleagues and friends?”

Kakashi swallows, harshly, the words echoing in his mind with his own father’s voice.

He nods. “Very well.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

The cave is a mess, splatters of blood on the walls, criss-cross scratches of kunais everywhere, and two bloody heaps in a corner.

 

Tenzou curses, loudly, while rushing towards them.

 

Kakashi grimaces, bending to pick the hiraishin kunai up from the floor, and then follows him over, hurriedly.

Tenzou calls to him, utter relief in his voice. “She’s alive. Barely, but alive.”

 

Kakashi nods, and then bends down to what was obviously, once upon a time, Kabuto.

He doesn’t touch the body, the split up abdomen already crawling with maggots. 

Kakashi steps back, looking around the cave for a moment, at the hole in the ground where some white tissue is still clinging to the walls, and the board with white stones, laying overturned in one corner.

 

He cannot say he is satisfied, but there’s something deep in his guts that feels suspiciously like pride.

 

He smiles grimly. “Looks like Anko attacked and managed to kill Kabuto after he got frustrated by the path the war was taking.”

Tenzou nods, carefully picking up Anko and carrying her over. “Yeah, she must have pulled out all the stops. There are several stab wounds on her, and she has bite marks on her arms, too. And the snakes seem to have been ripped from her wrist.”

Kakashi exhales, and then reaches to close the trench coat she wears, and feeling the fluttering pulse for a moment after, before he places her torn wrists onto her stomach.

 

He looks up at Tenzou and then smiles, before reaching out to clasp both, firmly. “Let’s go home.” He concentrates, and then adds, just before the void takes. 

 

 

“Let’s… heal.”

 

 

 

Notes:

The wiki page in regards to chimeras… it’s very interesting imho, and not just since Orphan Black :)) (Which was a really fascinating show.)

Oh, and while I said that canon is quasi over… there are a handful of things I want to keep because I like them (or find them interesting).

Chapter 43: We belong to the thunder

Notes:

There’s a song woven into their discussion here, a song that struck me as SO true for them I had to include it. I‘ll put the credits into the end notes.

Art in this chapter by the incredible @SD_27 - who just encapsulated that scene sooooo well <333 Thank you so much dear!!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

 

“Ouch.”

Kakashi grunts, trying to breathe, with Tenzou’s and Anko’s weight on his abdomen and lower body. He blinks, staring up at the ceiling for a moment, trying to get his bearings.

 

Tsunade’s voice carries a vague apology. “I’m sorry, Kakashi. I moved the hiraishin kunai from the table into the side drawer…” She grimaces, bending down over them. “I probably should have told you.” Her eyes flicker to Anko, and she kneels down, her expression shifting to concentration. “She killed her opponent?”

Tenzou grunts, while rolling off of Kakashi, and out from under Anko. “Yes, Kabuto is dead.”

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow, while green chakra glows. “That’s good news?”

Kakashi nods, carefully shifting Anko to lie on the floor. “Yes.”

Tsunade hums, not looking at him. “You didn’t tell me you’d attempt to get her.”

Kakashi frowns, slowly standing up. “I wasn’t sure whether the kunai was still with Kabuto.”

Tsunade nods, and then looks up, to the couch. “See? He got the hang of it, perfectly. Even bringing people along.”

 

Minato’s voice tinged with humor. “Indeed.” He hums. “Though I did see some of this skill on the battlefield, too.”

Kakashi turns to him, his stomach fluttering. “Sensei, I hadn’t seen you.”

Minato’s eyes sparkle. “I think you earned the right to call me by my name, hmm, Kakashi? Besides, your Sensei died back then.” He shrugs. “I’m… just a guest.”

Kakashi opens his mouth to respond, to disagree, but the door opens, and Kushina comes in, with a steaming cup of coffee. “Mina-kun, this coffee is so good, you have to try it, I jus…” She trails off, and then her expression lights up, with a huge smile. “Kakashi!”

Kakashi blinks at her, and then ducks his head a bit, feeling suddenly flustered. 

 

Tsunade speaks up, addressing Tenzou. “Yamato, will you help me get Anko to the hospital with the least jostling possible? I stabilized her, but she needs some surgeries still.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking down at her. “Will she be alright?”

Tsunade sighs, and then nods. “So far?” She clicks her tongue, looking up at him. “Though I think the ability to use these snakes will be gone. I’m not sure what that jutsu was rooted in, physically, but judging from these wounds…”

Kakashi grimaces, with a nod. 

Tenzou speaks up, tone calm. “Still, she’s alive.” He exhales. “Most of us are. Though some did not make it.”

Tsunade presses her lips together for a moment, and then looks up at Kakashi again. “Right. We need to hold a funeral, and a wake.”

Kakashi nods, silently.

Tsunade nods as well, looking at Tenzou. “Alright, on three.”

 

Kakashi watches as they carefully lift Anko again, on three, Tsunade obviously really not wanting to jostle Anko too much. He grimaces, knowing that this means that there’s likely some kind of injury she has not told them about.

 

They are silent, watching them leave, Kushina stepping aside silently to hold open the door.

 

 

The scent of coffee drifts through the sudden silence.

 

 

Minato eventually clears his throat. “So. We heard you were fed mouthfuls of cake this morning?”

Kakashi blinks and then leans back on the desk, crossing his ankles, with a snort. He rubs his face. “Yeah, well, I had the brilliant idea to bring it to him, as a birthday gift, so that was my own fault.”

Kushina closes the door and steps over to Minato, settling next to and leaning into him a bit, her eyes sparkling. “And he loved it.”

Kakashi nods, lowering his hands, with a sigh. “Yeah.” 

 

There’s another silence, the air between them heavy. 

 

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, eventually, forcing himself to break it. “So, where is he now? I mean, he obviously has been by?”

Kushina smirks. “He and Sasuke wanted to go to the bathhouses. From what I understood, some of their friends went with them?” She shoots a look at Minato. “That Sai, I think? And the grumpy one, Shika…something.”

Kakashi snorts. “Shikamaru, yes.” He hums. “Clever kid, that one. I hope he will be around when Naruto is going to be Hokage.”

Minato’s voice is soft, filled with humor. “First you though.”

Kushina hums, toasting him with her cup. “Oh yes.” She grins, broadly. “Rokudaime Hatake Kakashi.” She waggles her eyebrows. “Has a nice ring to it.”

Kakashi shoots her a bit of a skunk-eye, seeing her grin, his tone beyond dry. “Yeah, well, apparently I didn’t run to the hills fast enough.”

Minato chuckles. “Ah come on, Kakashi, you are the obvious choice.”

Kakashi grunts. 

 

Minato smirks, and then his face softens, the blue eyes glowing in the early evening sunlight streaming in through the windows. “How have you been, Kakashi?”

Kakashi stares at him, and then blinks, very slowly. Answering, from the depths of his soul. “I have no idea.” He snorts, without any humor. “It’s been a wild ride.” His throat clicks as he swallows. There’s pain bleeding from him now. “I’ve missed you, so much.”

 

He knows they understand that he means both of them.

 

Kakashi can see Minato swallow.

Kushina sniffs. “When did you…” She trails off, wiping angrily at her face.

 

Kakashi blinks, trying to report, trying not to feel too much. “Find you? Right after. I… waited outside the barrier.” His voice drops to a whisper. “I heard about the attack, I rushed back, but I was coming in from the other side, and I was stuck with the others.” He exhales, shudderingly. “If I just…”

Minato interjects, tone low, but firm. “There was nothing you could have done, Kakashi. Nothing.” He hesitates, with a frown. “Ultimately, it was too late already when birth set in.” He looks at Kushina, one hand coming up to trace her jaw for a moment. “I’m sorry it hurt so much.”

Kushina sniffs, and then shrugs. “Yeah well, apparently it always hurts, so…” She grins, a bit forcedly. “That fox claw did take the cake though.”

Minato snorts, and then chuckles, his hand dropping down to take Kushina’s free one, interlacing their fingers. “That it did.”

He sighs and then quirks an eyebrow, his eyes finding Kakashi’s again. “Hiruzen ignored our wishes.”

Kakashi nods, with a sniff. “Yeah, he… thought it was better to strip Naruto of his heritage. I wasn’t allowed to adopt him.”

Minato hums, weighing his head. “I bet there were layers to that decision though. Given the bond.”

Kakashi grimaces, and then works his jaw. “Yeah, probably. He must have known what my tattoo meant.” He swallows. “Still. There were offers to ado…” He trails off, frowning. But while Uchiha Mikoto wanted to adopt Naruto, the plan to kill the Uchiha was likely already in motion behind the scenes… is that why you didn’t let her adopt Naruto? Totally apart from the fact that he was the jinchuriki? To protect him after all? Kakashi shivers, forcing himself to let it go, for now.

He clears his throat. “He bound my knowledge, or better the ability to speak of it, into a seal.” He blinks, his eyes returning to Minato’s. “Not unlike the one you put on me.”

Minato’s eyes are huge, and sad, on his. “It was one of the hardest decisions, ever.” He smiles, painfully. “But at least I knew he would survive. I knew you would, too. And I knew you would protect him.”

 

Kakashi exhales, and the world blurs, for a moment, as a tear falls. 

His words are a whisper. “I didn’t want to, at first. I didn’t want the bond, I didn’t want him, in your place. I wanted you back. You both.” He hesitates, and then adds, brokenly. “I cried with him, and no-one came.”

 

Silence, the words like knives, finding their goal.

 

Kushina sniffs, eventually, taking a sip of her coffee, defiantly. “I’m so gonna kill him when we meet again.”

Kakashi snorts, nodding, tone a weird mix between caustic and elated. “Might be too late though.”

Kushina’s purple-blue eyes are hard. “That’s not gonna save him.”

 

There is another pause, though it’s not as heavy somehow, despite the comment.

Minato speaks up again, eventually, voice soft. “So how long did you stay in the Anbu?”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows. “Ahhh, until he was ten I think… I wanted to leave before, but was denied. I think I have to thank Iruka for changing the Sandaime’s mind, eventually.”

Minato smirks, letting the mention of Iruka slip, though there’s a tilt of his head, that Kakashi knows means he’s caught the name and the relation behind it. “Judging by what I’ve seen of your team, you were a good teacher.”

Kakashi snorts. “Oh, I’m not so sure about that. I mean…” He scoffs. “Sasuke was abducted under my care, Naruto had to be more or less on the move constantly because of the Akatsuki hunting him for the bijou, and Sakura possesses skills I couldn’t really help her with.” He shakes his head. “I started them on this road, maybe, but Yamato is Team 7’s Sensei, too, and he probably went onto more missions with them than I did. The Godaime removed me… from the equation at times, for obvious reasons.” He hesitates, with a frown. “But yes, ultimately, all three were trained by one of the legendary Sannins, and they turned out quite… exceptional.” 

Minato grins, and then sobers, with a sidelong gaze at Kushina. “What happened to Jiraiya?”

Kakashi swallows, working his jaw for a moment. “He died, fighting reanimated corpses that wore the rinnegan. Six of them.” Kakashi snorts. “I didn’t manage two.” He weighs his head, with a click of his tongue. “Though Naruto did, later. He defeated them all, destroying Konoha in the process.”

Minato watches him, silently, and Kakashi nods at the village visible through the windows, most of the buildings that are up once more in the finishing stages by now. “Konoha has come back, and stronger I believe, but it was a barren wasteland, a year ago.” He raises his eyebrows. “Naruto used the fox’ rage… he told me only the chakra imprint you left with the seal stopped the full and final transformation.”

Minato hums. “I’m glad that worked out then.” He frowns, looking at Kushina. “Think he has seen your message, too?”

Kushina shrugs. “Well, given the fact that he has mastered controlling all that bijou chakra by now…” She grins. “Definitely.”

 

Kakashi speaks up, feeling warm, and wondering what Naruto might have discussed with that imprint of his mother. “I’m glad.”

Kushina hums, taking another sip of her coffee, with a happy sigh, before looking up at Kakashi, directly. “And you knew when you found us that you were bonded? Do I understand that correctly?”

Kakashi grimaces, fidgeting a bit. “Yes.”

Kushina blinks, and then inhales, shudderingly. “That must have been so hard.”

Kakashi sniffs, looking away for a moment. “Jiraiya… Jiraiya told me I didn’t have to stay celibate for all that time…” Kakashi blushes a bit, willing himself to continue. “I have had relationships.” He swallows, returning his gaze to hers, with an effort. “Long ones, even.” He smiles, for a moment. “Ones, that, at the time, I would have preferred over this bond.”

Minato’s voice is gentle, oh so gentle. “And now?”

Kakashi exhales, in a rush, looking away again. “Now…” He hesitates, and then shakes his head. “I am so grateful for having these experiences, these relationships. The friendship and support that survived from them, despite it all. The memories.” He clears his throat. “It’s one of the reasons why I didn’t…” 

He trails off, biting his lips.

 

Kushina clears her throat. “It really must be quite hard.”

Kakashi nods, silently.

 

And then he shrugs. “But, you know, someone also told me that there’s love outside bonds, and I’ve tried to live by that.” He blinks and then sends her a look, with a quirk of an eyebrow. “So do you, apparently.”

Kushina blinks. “Well yes, but what…” She tilts her head in inquiry.

Kakashi smirks, raising his eyebrows. “Giving Obito… permission?”

 

Kushina laughs out, loudly, while Minato blushes, spectacularly. 

Her voice carries teasing. “Oh, that.” She shoots a look at Minato, biting the tip of her tongue for a moment, the action eerily familiar. “Well, it was written all over Obito’s face. And I had seen Minato blush, heavily, when Madara did that release.” She looks at Minato, expression sly, squeezing his hand. “I mean, I don’t really know what happened there, but it must have been something.”

Kakashi couldn’t swear on it, but he thinks Minato blushes even deeper.

Minato’s voice is a bit gruff. “I… can we discuss it at home?” He looks at her, fidgeting, and her grin broadens. “I’d like to tell you first.” He grunts, a bit pained. “Though I bet it will be all over the village eventually anyways, I mean, Obito is here now, and lots of people saw, and I just know there’ll be lots of rumors going round…”

Kakashi speaks up, stuck somewhere between abject embarrassment, and profound amusement, at seeing Minato like this, letting both emotions color his voice.  “And… he told me.”

Minato’s eyes snap to his, and it punches into Kakashi’s stomach.

It’s Kakashi’s turn to blush.

Heavily.

 

Kushina clicks her tongue. “Well, well, well… you can tell us then, I guess?” 

 

It’s not a question.

 

Kakashi opens his mouth to protest, oh, no, not now, not here? but Minato blurts out, the words rushed. “I slept with Obito. And Madara. I was hurt, they rescued me, it was weird, and Obito looked so forlorn, and we needed to get warm, and…” He trails off, blushing once more, looking at her pleadingly.

She stares at him, expression unreadable. 

Kakashi clears his throat, feeling a need to help him, somehow. Though he isn’t sure if he’s actually helping. “He told me that Madara really knew what he was doing.”

Minato twitches, and then says, with feeling. “Oh yes.”

Kushina blinks, and then starts to snicker, tone drawling. “I see.” She bites her lips, leaning into Minato with a whisper. "That’s so hot somehow? You have to show me later…“

Minato mewls, low in his throat, leaning in to kiss her. "I so love you.“

Kushina hums into the kiss, and then mumbles against his lips, still grinning. "You better.“

 

Her gaze glides past Minato’s shoulder, over to Kakashi. “So. You still want to kiss Minato, too?”

It’s Kakashi’s turn to blush, furiously, his tone gruff, asking, trying to deflect, though he already knows. “Why does everybody say that.”

Kushina laughs at him. “Because your crush on Minato was for all to see.” She snickers, with a sidelong gaze at her husband, who is still nosing along her face. It makes Kakashi just vaguely uncomfortable, to see Minato so vulnerable and besotted, but also way too hot, somewhere deep, deep down in his guts. 

His mind shifts back to that one night, years ago, with Kurenai and Asuma, and he grunts, hastily banishing the thought. 

 

Kushina clicks her tongue, continuing mercilessly. “Though, given, with what we know now it might have been rooted in your recognition of the bond with Naruto, buuuuuutttt…” She trails off, still grinning, and then looks at Minato, leaning in once more to nip at his lips. "If we were not who we are I would invite him to our bed…“, she shoots a look at Kakashi that punches into him, too, and he wheezes, before she continues, "but I think here and now… we probably shouldn’t.“

Minato swallows and then clears his throat, also shooting Kakashi a look. His blue eyes are dark, as is his voice. "You’re probably right. I mean, we’ll be his in-laws.“

Kushina pouts and sighs, loudly. Deliberately. "Shame though. Since we’re all more or less on the same age and level now…“

 

Kakashi blinks, staring at her, at them, not recognizing his own voice, the words seeming to deflect, but then he is only reacting right now, carefully not thinking. "Naruto has that same pout.“

Kushina‘s pout changes to a shit-eating grin, her red eyebrows waggling. "Oh?“

Minato draws back a bit, turning his face to Kakashi, his voice beyond dry. "And? Is he also such a damned tease?“

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head. "Oh yes.“

Kushina snickers. 

 

Kakashi swallows, and he sighs, tone raw, words coming from his soul. "I‘m so glad you’re back.“

So, so glad.

 

Kushina squeezes Minato’s hand, looking up at him for a moment, before her eyes return to Kakashi’s. "So are we.“

Minato smirks at her, and then he rolls his shoulders, the blue jacket he always wore under his jonin vest and coat shifting with it. Kakashi blinks, realizing for the first time that Minato looks like a civilian, and Kushina does, too, both only wearing the garments that would be worn under the armor now. 

Minato raises his eyebrows. “So. Coming along for dinner with us? Naruto insisted we had to go for ramen with him and Sasuke?”

Kakashi chuckles, and then freezes, shooting a look at the clock. 

He curses. “Ah damn, I…” He grimaces, and then shakes his head. “No, you should spend this evening alone, with him and Sasuke only. I would only be in the way. Besides…” He grimaces, and then pushes off the desk, waving his hand at the door. “Besides, I promised to take Iruka along for dinner with Obito, and I’m late, and I’ll never hear the end of it.” He hesitates, chuckling. “Though, to be honest, I made a whole art out of being late, for years, because I kept going to the cemetery for hours…” He trails off, the chuckle dying on his lips.

He swallows, and then smiles, quickly, seeing an echoing smile on Minato’s and Kushina’s lips, knowing it transmits. 

He sniffs, nodding. “Guess I’ll have to find something else to do with my mornings.”

Kushina grins at him, just a bit wobbly. 

 

Kakashi nods again, and then walks out the door, feeling out of body, and yet rooted deep into reality in a way he’s never quite felt before.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Iruka’s tone is stern, and dry as the desert when he opens the door. “Been stuck somewhere on the path of life?”

Kakashi grunts, and then snorts, with a shrug. “Been stuck with Minato and Kushina after rescuing Anko.”

Iruka blinks, and then he sighs, his eyes closing briefly. “Oh, thank god.” He reopens his eyes, pulling the door behind himself shut. “Thank you for rescuing her.”

Kakashi nods, and then turns his feet into the general direction of the house Obito is in. “I heard that there’s a new barbecue restaurant… I thought maybe we could get a booth there?”

Iruka nods, falling into step next to him. “Good idea. The half-seclusion of the booths will help us relax.”

Kakashi hums, shooting him a look. “You know you don’t have to, if you don’t want to.”

Iruka grimaces, and then rolls his shoulders. “I do want to.” He frowns, and he shakes his head. “I think I need to, as well, but I do want to.” He swallows. “I want to ask him…” He trails of.

Kakashi blinks, looking up at the sky for a moment. “Why?”

Iruka nods, mutely. 

Kakashi sniffs, and then lowers his voice, to a whisper between them. “He said he’d been used as a distraction that night, so Madara could retrieve Hashirama’s body.”

Iruka blinks up at Kakashi, a shiver in his voice. “A… distraction?”

Kakashi cackles, viciously. “Right?” He grimaces. “But it… fits with what I know. With what we know. Orochimaru’s experiments, the cells of Hashirama that were used to create the Zetsus, and Tenzou.” He shoots Iruka a look. “The fact that while Minato and Kushina had to sacrifice their lives to stop the fox…”, Kakashi grimaces, choosing the words carefully, knowing they’ll wound nonetheless, “despite all that, and despite people losing their lives that night… nothing really happened.”

Iruka stops, there on the street, staring at him. Echoing, dumbly. “Nothing really happened?”

Kakashi grimaces, turning to him, his voice low. “I know the pain of that night Iru-kun. I know. You know I know. But… ultimately Obito left again, after triggering the fox. Supposedly because he was weakened, but… it makes much more sense if you factor in that Madara just got what he wanted, right.”

Iruka stares at him, wide-eyed, not blinking. 

The words, when they finally come, are toneless. “Son of a bitch.”

 

Kakashi swallows, and then reaches up, to push a strand of hair out of Iruka’s forehead. “I know.”

Iruka shivers, and Kakashi draws him into an embrace, holding fast.

It takes a while for Iruka to relax, but Kakashi closes his eyes in relief when he finally does, Iruka’s arms coming round and up Kakashi’s back, holding on tightly. Kakashi starts to stroke his back.

Iruka’s voice is muffled, against Kakashi’s uniform collar. Carried on a sniff. “I wanna punch him.”

Kakashi snorts. Drawling. “I won’t stop you.”

Iruka pulls back, just a bit, raising his eyebrows. “No?”

Kakashi pulls a bit of a face, deliberately. “A broken nose is the least of what Obito deserves, and he knows it, too.” He sobers again, with a frown. “But he’s here, not… fleeing. He could, you know.” His eyes find Iruka’s again, locking their gazes. “That has to count for something.”

Iruka’s expression crumbles, and he looks away for a long moment, and then nods, slowly. 

He sniffs. “Still. It might take a while for me to warm up to him.”

Kakashi nods. “I know.” He quirks an eyebrow. “But you decided to make the effort nonetheless…” He smiles, a quick, shivering smile. “And I know you are doing it for me.”

Iruka’s big eyes fill with tears, and he looks away, wiping at them, angrily. “Yeah, well, yes, but I also don’t want this to stand between us. I don’t want him to stand between us. So, in a way, I’m doing it for me, too.”

Kakashi smiles, beatifically, knowing Iruka can see it, despite the mask, a weight he didn’t know he was carrying lifting. His voice shivers. “I love you.”

Iruka exhales, rolling his shoulders, and then points a finger. “Your treat tonight.”

Kakashi grins, wobbly. “Definitely.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

The moment Obito opens the door, Iruka freezes.

 

So does Obito.

 

 

Kakashi blinks, letting his gaze travel over to Iruka before turning back to Obito, opening his mouth to say something, and then closes it again, when Iruka shivers.

And Obito swallows.

Still staring.

 

Iruka’s right hand comes up, covering his left inner arm, over the cloth.

Kakashi blinks again, staring down at it.

 

Remembering what’s under the cloth, in sudden crystal clarity, and a white-hot shiver, running down his spine.

 

And Iruka says, slowly, drily, angrily. “Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me.”

 

 

And Kakashi, so help him god… snorts.

 

 

Iruka’s gaze crawls over to him, and there’s heat in that gaze, and his voice. “You think that’s funny?”

Kakashi holds up a finger, ignoring Obito’s still frozen state, unable to keep the close-to-gallows humor from his voice. “I… honestly, just… I mean, you seem to like scarred men with a sharingan?” He starts to snicker, shooting a look at Obito. “And you? Scarred men with dark eyes? And standing up hair?”

Obito and Iruka both stare at him now, unblinking.

Kakashi snickers. “Oh god, I mean, if fate really is an entity, the humor of it is truly unparalleled.”

 

Obito speaks up, voice toneless somehow, while his eyes find Iruka’s. “He makes my skin crawl.”

Kakashi weighs his head, prompting, still working through the humor. “You mean itch.”

Obito narrows his eyes, with a blink. “What?”

Kakashi hums, and then starts to recite. “There’s an itch, and a pull, and a churning deep in your gut.” Both sets of eyes are on him once more, and he sobers, slowly, his voice low now, imploring. “The tattoo that Iruka has burns, and throbs.” Iruka’s eyes fill with tears, and he shivers now. 

Kakashi swallows, suddenly not feeling like laughing anymore, at all. 

His voice drops to a whisper. “It’s imperative to get close, somehow, though I bet both of you are fighting it right now… but… The bond has made itself known, and you both feel it.” He smiles a trembling smile. “Congratulations.”

 

Obito exhales, shudderingly.

Iruka blinks, tears dropping unheeded. “He killed my parents.”

Obito’s face crumbles, and he sinks to his knees, slowly. Mutely.

Kakashi feels numb suddenly, unable to really cope.

Iruka turns his head, staring at Kakashi. “What… what happens now?”

 

And Kakashi exhales, in a rush.

Forcing himself to be the support that Iruka needs now. That Obito needs now, too. “Now… now we’ll go for dinner.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Obito’s clothes are still dirty, from where he had kneeled in the dusty street.

 

Kakashi stares at the sizzling meat, the mood between them weird, almost tranquil.

He blinks, slowly, realizing he’s zoned out again, just a bit.

The shock of this sits deep. And for Iruka it comes with a mountain of grief, and for Obito, with a mountain of guilt. He swallows, shooting Obito, who is sitting across from him, a look. That night cut you deeply, both of you. All of us. Maybe…

He clears his throat. Feels their attention shift to him, sluggishly somehow.

Kakashi taps his finger on the table, twice, and then inhales, trying to find the right words. “I want to apologize, for earlier. I just…” He grimaces. 

Iruka swallows, audibly, but doesn’t say anything.

Obito just stares, mutely.

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, and then tries, again. “You both know that I… know you. Or knew you. I… think I know both your hearts.” He swallows, eyes finding Obito’s for a moment, before Obito averts his gaze again. Kakashi sighs. 

He shakes his head, turning it left, towards Iruka, the profile in stark contrast against the backdrop of the restaurant. “You know I love you.” 

He lets the words hang there, in the air, seeing Iruka shiver.

He smirks, just softly. “Maybe we can heal from that night now, together.”

Iruka tilts his head, towards him, the big brown eyes filled with tears. The voice is hard, but also wobbly somehow, forced. “You really think so?”

 

Obito speaks up, voice hollow, dead. “So much wasted time, so much pain, so much heartache, because I chased a dream.”

Kakashi swallows, looking over to him.

Iruka sniffs, reaching up to wipe his eyes. 

Obito cackles, once, with a shake of his head. “Imagine if…” He trails off.

Kakashi exhales, shudderingly, reaching out to distribute the meat, silently. 

He makes himself speak, when he puts new slices on, after. “We thought you were dead. For long years I didn’t dare think about the off chance that you could still be alive, it would hurt too much.”

Kakashi sniffs, clicking his tongue. “It was Iruka who healed a part of me.” He smiles, quickly, shooting a look at the brown-haired and still very quiet man besides him. “A big part.” 

Obito looks down at his plate, pushing at the meat with his sticks. “Why did you break up?”

Iruka turns his head at that, to look at Kakashi. Silently.

Kakashi shivers under the intensity of the gaze. “I… the bond.” He doesn’t elaborate further, letting the pain that burns in Iruka’s dark eyes run through him. “I earlier told Minato that I didn’t want it and it’s true. I didn’t want it then.”

Iruka sobs, once, his voice broken. “I don’t want this one either.” His face crumbles, and he shoots a look at Obito, a look that’s between stubborn and apologetic. “Sorry.”

Obito shakes his head, very slowly. “No, it’s… I get it.” 

Kakashi frowns, staring at the mop of black hair, Obito’s lowered face cast in shadows. 

He blinks, latching onto what’s unsaid. “But… you do?”

Obito blinks, slowly, eyebrows raising. “I…” He trails off again, staring unseeing into space. 

Iruka’s voice is almost a hiss. “Why. Why do you want it?”

Obito looks up, slowly, the black eyes huge. His voice is breaking on the words. “Because… because it means I belong?” He smiles, a terrible, trembling smile. “And I… yearn to belong.”

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, his own heart yearning, too, suddenly, viciously. 

 

Iruka’s voice is a whisper. “This is not going to be easy, is it.”

Obito seems to shake his head, with a whisper of shifting cloth. “No.”

 

Iruka swallows, noisily. 

He clears his throat, and softly bumps into Kakashi, prompting him to reopen his eyes. He licks his lips, eyes moving back and forth on Kakashi’s and then he smiles, a painful, little smile, and Kakashi can see the moment he decides, decides to take a leap of faith. 

To put in the effort.

 

Kakashi smiles back at him, his word blurry.

 

Iruka inhales, with a nod. “So.” He looks up at Obito. “I heard you kissed both Minato and Kakashi? On that battlefield.”

Kakashi blushes, immediately, helplessly, while Obito snorts, surprised. 

Obito ducks his head, while rubbing a hand over it. “Yeah, well, I… remembered something. And  I had wanted to kiss Kakashi ever since I showed up in his apartment back then.”

Iruka blinks, shooting a look at Kakashi, who shrugs. “You showed up in his apartment?”

Obito nods, with a sigh, something in his posture relaxing. “Yeah, I mean, I knew he had recognized me when I stopped them from finding Sasuke. I was… intrigued by that. By the acceptance behind it.” He smirks, softly, wryly. “I couldn’t help myself.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, keeping his voice low. “Sora-san was the one who forced me to accept.” He shares a look with Iruka, and then sighs, with a shrug. “She was also the one who forced me to acknowledge that you were still out there. When we encountered you in that Tobi persona…” He snorts, once. “I just knew.”

Obito hums, quirking an eyebrow. “I see.” He frowns. “But how could she know I was still alive?”

Kakashi grimaces, just a bit. “She reminded me that the Mangekyo could only have developed for us both.”

Obito blinks. “Ah.” He works his jaw for a moment, before inhaling, deeply, obviously forcing levity. “I wonder when your eyes will activate now.”

Kakashi shrugs, looking away for a moment. “I… It doesn’t really matter. Sharingan or not, I can see again…” He hesitates, frowning, his voice dropping to a whisper. “That is more than I anticipated. For chidori I will find another way.”

Obito grins at him, a short, quick grin that’s there and gone again. “And of course it helps that he created them for you, doesn’t it… from my eyes and his cells.”

Kakashi blinks, a shiver running down his spine.

Iruka frowns. “From… your eyes and his cells?”

Obito nods, finally picking up a cold piece of meat with his sticks. “Yes. I asked Naruto to take my eyes as template. But he created them with an influx of his own chakra and cells.” He nods at Kakashi, who stares at him. “Probably Kakashi’s cells, too, but definitely using his own as well.”

Obito smiles, another quick little smile, but one that’s filled to the brim with soul. “The bond engaged when you reopened them, didn’t it? I saw the shock on Naruto’s face.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long moment, feeling the weight of Iruka’s gaze. 

He shrugs. “Yeah, well, I mean, he did recognize it then. But…” He trails off, reopening his eyes and looking away.

Iruka exhales, on a sigh. “Well, I can now testify that nothing is as easy, even if it engages and the bonded recognize each other.” His eyes find Obito’s for a moment, before looking away again. 

And then he snorts. “I had really hoped for an easy thing, for once. Honestly.”

Kakashi hums, reaching for his glass and pulling down his mask, for them. “Is anything though? Truly?”

 

Obito’s stomach growls, and he snorts, shaking his head. 

There’s a caustic undertone to his voice. “No, the easy things are the what lead you down the wrong road. The broad, even road that leads to hell, paved with good… intentions.” He hesitates, and then raises his eyes to Iruka’s, bravely. “Kakashi… Kakashi says he loves you. I know some of Kakashi’s heart.” He hesitates, the muscles in his jaw jumping. “I know I’m no prize…”

Iruka blinks, shaking his head, but Obito holds up his free hand, with a chuckle. “No really, no need to pretend.” He swallows. “I know what the cave did.” His gaze lowers to the piece of meat he’s holding. Kakashi blinks, moving to take the new pieces off the grill, saving them from burning to charcoal. 

Obito exhales. “I know that when I put this meat into my mouth, I will once more be able to taste it. Feel the hunger for it. Which is something I have to thank Kaguya for. I know that these artificial limbs feel differently now.” He swallows, and then he shrugs. “I know that, apart from Uchiha Sasuke and Uchiha Itachi, I am the only Uchiha left now, and I am also the reason for that.” He snorts, the sound without any humor. “That will be an interesting thing to face still, too.”

He inhales, shudderingly. “I know that I feel dangerously unmoored right now.” His eyes fill with tears. “I know that… I want to belong. I want to feel. I want to taste. I want to look at the sun, without a mask.” 

He blinks, his eyes rising to meet Iruka’s. “I want to run my fingers through your hair, and find out whether it is as silky as it looks.”

Iruka shivers, heavily. 

 

Kakashi blinks, and then he smirks, very softly. Fondly. “You should see it fanned out over a pillow… he’s really beautiful.”

Iruka’s head whips round, with a hiss. “Kakashi!”

Kakashi grins at him, while toasting him, tone deliberately light. “But you are?”

Iruka blushes, lips pressed together, but Kakashi can see he is not angry, just flustered.

Obito’s voice is a whisper. “I can imagine.”

Iruka rubs a hand down his face, with a shake of his head. “Oh, I hate the two of you.”

Kakashi snorts, and then draws him into a half-embrace, pushing his forehead to Iruka’s temple. 

He whispers against Iruka’s skin. “And I love you both, so help me god.”

Iruka inhales, shudderingly. And then he grins, tilting his head just a bit, so he can shoot Kakashi a look from the corner of his eyes. “I mean, supposedly there’s love outside bonds, right?”

Kakashi snorts again, and grins. “That’s what I’ve heard, too.” He sobers, slowly, watching Iruka sober, too. He whispers again, knowing Obito can hear it, too. “I know you can heal each other, Iru-kun. I know that’s why you wanted to meet him, too. I…” He hesitates, shaking his head just slightly. “You two bonding was a surprise, but…” 

Iruka huffs a laugh, and then nods once. “Yeah.” He swallows. “But you’re right.” He inhales, deeply, and then looks over at Obito, who is watching with an expression that screams ‘pain‘.

Iruka quirks a somber grin, there and gone again. “We can heal each other.”

Obito hesitates, and then nods, whispering. “I’d love that.”

 

His stomach growls again, and Iruka snorts, wiping at his eyes, before straightening up a bit. 

He clicks his tongue. “We should eat.” He picks at a piece of black meat with his sticks. “If you can actually eat that.”

Obito speaks up, tone dry, obviously trying for levity. “The only thing Kakashi could cook is fish…”

Iruka chuckles, nodding, with a sidelong gaze at Kakashi, who winks at him. “True. He’s good enough with vegetables, but helpless with meats.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, tone fake upset. “Hey!”

Obito snorts. 

The atmosphere lightens somehow, just a bit.

Iruka licks his lips, and then nods, starting to put new meat on the grill with a sniff. “I’ll take care of it.” He looks up at Obito. “Anything you’d like with the meat? I mean now that you can taste again?”

Obito’s eyes crinkle, and he smirks, just lightly. “Maybe later.” His eyes find Iruka’s. “For now… I’m absolutely fine.”

Iruka nods, ducking his head, just slightly.

 

Kakashi blinks, feeling warmth spread, somewhere deep within him, with bone-deep relief.

 

 

 

Oh. Thank god.

 

 

We’ll be alright.

 

 

 

They… will be alright.

 

 

 

Eventually.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

It’s cold up there, on Minato’s stone head, but it’s also simply where he needs to be. 

 

Kakashi inhales, deeply, the air filling his lungs, almost as crisp and clear as there.

He feels for the longing for beyond, but it is subdued, far away, the promise of what life here holds, now, far too tempting.

 

And yet.

 

Naruto flops down next to him, with a groan. “Oh, I’m so full.”

Kakashi chuckles, looking at him from the corner of his eyes, warmth spreading from deep within him. “Yeah? How many bowls did you have, this time?”

Naruto looks at him, with a grimace. “Nine?”

Kakashi snorts, and then turns his head, looking him up and down. “Where the hell do you put them?”

Naruto grins, looking out over Konoha with a shrug. 

 

Kakashi grins to himself. “And you let Sasuke go home with your parents… alone?”

Naruto snickers. “Ah well… I had the distinct impression that Min… my Dad is still a bit unsure, and Mom is… “, he weighs his head, “intense.” They share a chuckle. “And she was the one asking for Sasuke to escort them home… I think she wanted to get to know him a bit better.” 

Naruto sobers slowly. “This is all so new, with them… it feels unreal. We’re all obviously still finding our feet.” He clicks his tongue. “I’m gonna go and show them around tomorrow. And we want to cook lunch together, so that’s cool I guess. Kaguya seems to be happy sitting in the garden for now, listening to the birds… though my Dad said that they’ve been having some discussions about life and death and powers and all that. He says she’s fascinating.”

 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. I bet. He inhales, and then just states, knowing he won’t be able to sugarcoat it and that Naruto will want, and need to know. “Sensei Iruka and Obito are bonded.“

Naruto‘s attention snaps to him. His voice is an octave too high. “What?”

Kakashi grunts, with a slow nod. And an exaggerated sigh. “Yeah, well, I’m afraid we cannot kill him now either.”

Naruto snorts. And then he chuckles, with a shake of his head. “Nope. We cannot do that to Sensei Iruka.” 

“Nope.” Kakashi exhales, tilting his head back to look at the stars above him.

Naruto follows his gaze, humming softly. Guessing correctly. “Do you miss it?”

Kakashi shrugs, and then lays back, taking off his hitai-ate and crossing his arms behind his head. “Sometimes.” He hesitates. “Did you see the other side when you…” He trails off.

Naruto sniffs, laying back as well, though his arms are at his sides, hands loosely clasped on his stomach. His voice is a whisper. “When I burnt?”

A lance of pain, right through Kakashi’s heart. He tries to breathe through it.

Naruto’s throat clicks as he swallows. “I… no. I don’t think it was that final… I mean, Mom and Sakura and Hinata managed to heal me, right.”

Kakashi whispers, knowing his voice carries the agony. “It felt final.”

I almost killed Sasuke in the fit of rage that it triggered. Raced at Madara, with no sense. He grimaces, to himself.

 

Naruto is silent, for a long moment. “I think it kinda was, too, despite being not, but… I crossed the… line. But that crossing was what enabled my vision with Rikkudo Sennin. So…”

Kakashi turns his head a bit, shoots him a look. “But I thought you got this vision because you got all that bijou chakra?”

Naruto weighs his head, a bit. “Still. I had to open that door for him to reach me.” He snorts. “He has been dead for a while after all.”

Kakashi hums and turns his head back, to look back at the stars. 

He frowns, and then just asks, trying to keep his voice even. “Do you want me to leave?”

Naruto’s head tilts again, right and up, to look at him. “Leave?”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, and then pushes himself up and onto his left side, propping his head up on an elbow. He clicks his tongue. “Well, you know. Leave this plane of existence.” He hesitates, and then speaks past the ball of black tar in his gut, the churning ball that wants to take his breath, while Naruto just stares at him, stunned. “I could just wait for you there. I was at peace there. With my Dad. It would be alright. I could wait for you there.”

 

Naruto blinks, very slowly. Tone vicious. “What?!”

Kakashi exhales, with a sigh, and then grimaces. “That way you could have this life with Sasuke. If you acknowledge the bond as broken that is.” He presses his lips together, for a moment, and then locks their gazes, trying to ignore the furious expression on Naruto’s face and the eyes that are glowering at him. And that feel good, so, so good. “I know you know it. Sasuke knows it. I know it. It’s approaching, I can feel it. I know you can feel it, too.” Sasuke even said so, this morning.

Naruto’s expression is pinched now, stubborn, but he is silent, and Kakashi inhales, deeply, before continuing. “There is nothing… nothing I want more than this bond, with you and what it promises…, and yet I want you… I need you to fully understand that when it comes, for us, when it becomes real… it will hurt Sasuke. A lot. And thereby you.” Kakashi blinks, looking away for a moment. “Because you love him.” 

He smiles, broadly, watching the pain flit over Naruto’s face. Forcing himself to continue. “And I love that you love him, because I adore how your soul shines, your whole being seemingly made of light and sun and I know that there is love outside bonds…” He chuckles, and then sniffs. “Jiraiya always used to say that, and it’s become somewhat of a mantra…” He frowns, sobering. “But it’s true, too.”

Naruto blinks, slowly, and then hisses, there between them. “And so, you’re offering to… what… to commit suicide?”

Kakashi shrugs, a bit weirdly there on his side. Knowing his father won’t mind the jab. “I mean… it runs in the family.”

Naruto scoffs. Harshly.

Kakashi inhales, deeply, and then reaches out to draw the back of his index finger over a whiskered cheek. He whispers. “You could be free.” He lets his hand drop away. “I would be fine, and you know it. And now… Iruka and Obito will be fine, too.” Eventually.

Naruto averts his gaze, mouth set in a thin line.

 

But he stays silent, and Kakashi lays back again after a moment, with a sigh, watching the sparkling night sky. 

 

He almost misses Naruto’s words, they are spoken so low. “Did you really think I would create eyes for you if I didn’t want you around?”

Kakashi hums, swallowing. “No. I mean, there’s a piece of you in me now.” He shakes his head on the stone. “I… feel as close to you as I have ever felt.” I knew you would come here. I just… knew.

Naruto huffs, shivering, deflecting a bit. “Oh god, Jiraiya would have loved that statement.”

Kakashi smirks softly, shooting him a look. “We would have never heard the end of it.”

Naruto clicks his tongue. “Nope.” He hesitates, and then turns onto his side, shuffling up and over a bit to look down on Kakashi. One hand comes up, hesitantly, and Kakashi just smiles, not moving, letting him pull down the mask, gently, carefully. 

Naruto puts his left hand onto Kakashi’s cheek, just holding.

His eyes find Kakashi’s. “I… I don’t want to regret anything. I want to live, experience everything.” He swallows, his thumb stroking over Kakashi’s skin. “I told you, after Pain, it is what made me rage, that I was robbed of the chance…” He frowns, falling silent, pressing his lips together for a moment. His voice drops to a whisper. “I want to experience it all. The fun parts and the painful parts.” He smiles, broadly, waggling his eyebrows, while his eyes fill with tears. “I’m already used to a lot of pain, so…” The smile breaks, with a swallow. “I know how to work through it.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, and then reaches up, to put his palm onto Naruto’s cheek as well. Stroking softly, too. Asking, offering, one last time. “Are you sure?”

Naruto’s eyes fill with tears, and he nods, wildly, while he sobs, once. “Yes.”

Kakashi nods, too, and then smiles, gently. “Alright.”

Naruto sniffs. “Alright.”

 

Kakashi inhales, deeply, another weight dropping away. Another weight I wasn’t aware carrying. He smirks.

Naruto quirks an eyebrow. “What is it?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “I just… being with you, being able to finally accept what I have with you… what I will have with you… I feel so light.” He blinks, slowly, watching Naruto’s eyes darken. “You make me breathe.”

Naruto snorts, though his eyes carry a weight now, one that can be felt gliding over Kakashi. “I make you breathe?”

Kakashi shrugs, with a grin. “You’re the reason why I’m here, now, alive.” And the prospect that I can let myself fall into love with you now… that it’s fine if I do… Kakashi sniffs, blinking the tears away.

Naruto’s face crumbles and then he taps his index finger, on Kakashi’s skin, with a sniff. “And I don’t want to hear anything about that, ever again.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, deliberately. “Fiiiinnnne.”

Naruto nods, and then huffs a laugh, shaking his head.

 

And then he lowers himself to nestle into an embrace, shifting to align himself with Kakashi’s body and Kakashi shifts, with a sigh, missing the hand that drops from his cheek to his throat immediately, but the feeling of Naruto’s nose, pushing up under his jaw is even better, and the breath puffing against the skin there is everything and he just smiles, clasping Naruto’s shoulder and back in his arms.

 

Holding, everything he ever wanted.

 

And he’s warm, so warm.

 

Naruto speaks up after a while, his left leg shifting to hook over Kakashi’s. “I heard this song the other day, it reminded me of us.”

Kakashi hums, just breathing, floating in the moment. “What song.”

Naruto shakes his head, the tiniest bit. “Oh, just this old, foreign song. But the text translation stuck with me…” He presses in, the tip of his nose gliding along the column of Kakashi’s throat. “And, you know… I‘m wind, you’re lighting… we are the thunder. We belong to it.”

Kakashi shivers, heavily.

Naruto lifts his head, frowning. “What?”

Kakashi chuckles, the tiniest bit forced, trying to keep the shiver from his voice. “I… It’s just that I likened our bond, and the prospect to it to thunder rolling in the distance earlier. I…” He trails off.

Naruto nods, and then grins, before nestling in again, with a sigh. “Well, we are the thunder.“ He hesitates. "So is Sasuke, but it seems to fit better for us somehow. ”

They are silent for a moment.

 

Eventually Kakashi speaks up again, softly stroking Naruto’s back. “So, that song. Do I know it?”

Naruto shrugs. “I have no idea?” He shifts, just slightly, his thumb stroking lightly over Kakashi’s still covered Adam’s apple. “I could recite what I remember?”

Kakashi hums, tightening his arms. “Please do.”

 

Naruto is silent for a long moment, and then starts to recite, voice coming haltingly. “Many times I tried to tell you / Many times I cried alone. 

Kakashi shivers, swallowing harshly. 

Naruto inhales, deeply. “Always I'm surprised how well you cut my feelings to the bone.” His voice drops to a whisper. “Don't want to leave you really / I've invested too much time / to give you up that easy / To the doubts that complicate your mind.

 

Silence, as the words sink in. 

Naruto clears his throat after a moment. “I actually snorted when I heard the last part… because you really are thinking too much, Kakashi. I told you that before.“

Kakashi snorts, glad when his voice is stable. “I remember.”

Naruto hums. "We were cuddling then, too.“

Kakashi swallows, and then sighs, prompting, tightening his arms, just the tiniest bit. "Is there more?“

Naruto shifts, with a small sigh. "Yes.“

He hesitates, and then continues, whispering: "We belong to the light, we belong to the thunder / We belong to the sound of the words we've both fallen under / Whatever we deny or embrace for worse or for better / We belong, we belong, we belong together.“

 

Kakashi’s throat clicks, as he swallows. 

Naruto shivers in his arms. "Maybe it's a sign of weakness when I don't know what to say / Maybe I just wouldn't know what to do with my strength anyway…“

Naruto pushes up, looking down on Kakashi, his face cast into shadows by the moon‘s pale light. Kakashi stares up to him, feeling pinned, flayed open, the left hand pressing into the small of Naruto’s back sweaty suddenly, while Naruto reaches for his right, links their hands. 

Naruto’s voice cracks on the words. "Have we become a habit? Do we distort the facts? / Now there's no looking forward / Now there's no turning back.

Tears fall from Kakashi’s eyes, dripping onto the rock, silently. 

Naruto sniffs, unclenching and clenching their hands. And then he smiles beatifically, leaning down a bit. Whispers, the heat of him the only thing Kakashi feels, the scent of him the only thing he smells and tastes, tickling in his nose and on his tongue. "Close your eyes and try to sleep now / Close your eyes and try to dream / Clear your mind and do your best to try and wash the palette clean.

Kakashi inhales, shudderingly. Whispering, too. "But we cannot wipe the palette, not yet.“ 

Naruto rolls his eyes, continuing, with slightly more intensity. "We can't begin to know it, how much we really care / I hear your voice inside me“, he hesitates, his words almost inaudible. "I see your face everywhere.

 

Silence falls again, the wind changing and pushing now, ruffling their hair. 

Kakashi just tries to breathe, the pain beautiful once more, beyond compare. 

Naruto lowers his forehead to his, breathing with him, for long minutes. 

Kakashi speaks into the space between them, the one that is simply them, desperately trying for levity. "Now that I will stay I have to inform you that you‘ll see my face up here too. Not just everywhere.“

Naruto snorts. And then he snickers, reopening his eyes, looking at Kakashi from short distance. "Will you be the one with the mask?“

Kakashi chuckles and then waggles his eyebrows. "Definitely.“

Naruto grins, and then exhales, lifting his head just a bit. His voice is surprisingly brittle. "Good. Because I will be the one with the whiskers and at least…“ He trails off. 

Kakashi squeezes his hand, silently, and Naruto ducks his head, just a bit, nodding once. 

He sniffs, looking at Kakashi’s hand, for once without gloves, at the skin shining white, the silver lines of thousands of thin scars his lightning style burnt into his skin. 

He hums, turning Kakashi’s hand slightly to look at Kakashi‘s wrist. "Sasuke has the same on his left. Feelings made lighting, cut through flesh and into bone…“ He hesitates, and then sighs, looking up again to lock their gazes. "You and him are paths I have to choose between.“

Kakashi blinks, and then shakes his head, slowly. He clicks his tongue. "No, not choose. Paths you have to travel.“

Naruto nods, the expression in his eyes wistful. He answers, after a moment. "You’re right. And I know it, too, now.“

Kakashi smiles at him, softly. 

Naruto exhales in a rush. His voice is small somehow. "What happens now?“

 

 

And Kakashi chuckles, softly, his heart and soul fluttering. "Now… we live.“

 

Naruto hums, nestling back in again."So, we live and love and learn, for now?“

Kakashi shrugs, lightly. "I guess?“

Kakashi can feel the brush of the lashes against his skin as Naruto blinks. 

 

Naruto‘s voice carries a giggle. "Kurama thinks we should make out, right now.“

Kakashi grunts, realizing something, for the first time. Tries to sound nonchalant, while abject horror rushes down, deep into his gut. "I… is he always watching?“

Naruto hums, and the grins, fiendishly, the movement transmitting somehow. "It’s the only entertainment he gets?“

Kakashi stares unseeing into space. The words are heartfelt. "Oh god.“

Naruto snickers, laughter in his voice. "I‘m supposed to tell you that you better make up for lost time when...“ He trails off, and Kakashi can feel Naruto blush. 

Kakashi grunts, tone dry beyond measure. "Great. No pressure then.“

He can feel Naruto chuckle, soundlessly. 

 

The word is pressed onto his skin with a kiss. "Baka.“

 

 

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, and grins. 

Helplessly.

 

And slightly mortified.

 

 

 

And falls asleep, right there, on the stony embodiment of old longing and the past, holding tightly onto his future.

 

 

 

 

SD_27_KakaNaru_cuddling

 

 

Notes:

Song by Pat Benatar: We belong

Also: Some of you guessed correctly :) - what do you think? Does it fit? ☺️

And a bit of an “early” warning: I’ll be away for a few weeks in two weeks, so there’ll be a bigger gap coming up (I’ll repeat it in the notes then). Still, just fyi 💕

Chapter 44: A worthy goal

Notes:

Afaik Shikamaru’s dream differs in anime and manga, I referenced the manga.

 

I have included an art in this chapter, one I commissioned from kokodraws01 - they did a drawing of Minato a while back (which, imho(!), is extremely close to what anime and manga showed us?) and really, really, REALLY wanted to see their take on Naruto :))

>> That art is “blank period” age Naruto (~19) (as it is in my head, they did a fantastic job). So it’s the tiniest bit too old for “here”, buuuuuuuuuuuutttttt I thought for that scene it still fit, and so you know what’s in MY head when we’ll get there^^. (At least it is NOW, thanks to them :)))))

(Oh, and if you haven't seen - THIS art for Minato and Kushina is... just gorgeous imho).

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

Mirai is squealing on his arm, a welcome change from a row of meetings that Tsunade had insisted he attend with her. And that he had ducked out of, in the afternoon.

 

He knows these meetings are important.

But so is visiting Guy.

And holding Mirai.

 

If all the changes in my life have made anything clear, then this.

 

He frowns, seeing the smoke rise from the bench slightly out of sight, that bench, and changes direction, shifting Mirai so she can sit in his crooked arm more comfortably. 

 

Shikamaru is bent over, elbows on his knees, head low, his fingers holding a cigarette that burns down by itself.

 

Kakashi hesitates, and then steps up, tone low. “Would you put it out while she’s here?”

Shikamaru’s head comes up, blinking, and then he nods, with a sniff. “Of course.” He drops the cigarette and pushes his heel to it, with a small grimace. And then straightens up, silently extending his arms, and Mirai squeals, and Kakashi passes her onto Shikamaru, with a chuckle.

Shikamaru lets her settle on his lap, stroking her hair and pulling faces at her for a moment, while she hops a bit up and down on him.

He smirks, softly, shooting Kakashi a look. “I’m so glad they’re alright, you know.”

Kakashi nods, and then sits back on the bench with a sigh, watching Shikamaru and Mirai for a moment. He keeps his voice soft. “I heard he was sealed by the three of you, on one of the beaches?” He doesn’t specify who, knowing Shikamaru understands just fine.

Shikamaru nods, with a grimace of pain passing over his face, there and gone again. “Yes.” He cackles, once. “He was too far away for her jutsu.”

Kakashi nods, with a sniff of his own. “Yes, she said there was a range limit. Similar to the rinnegan’s jutsus.”

Shikamaru leans forward, presses a shaky kiss to Mirai’s head. “I feel so bad?”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, and then shakes his head. “It was not your actions, that led to him being revived on that beach.” He shoots Shikamaru a look. “And I bet he didn’t just fight you, but also talked to you?”

Shikamaru frowns, heavily, looking away.

Mirai pushes up, tugging at his hair.

Kakashi watches him, waiting, knowing Shikamaru is working himself through it.

Eventually, Shikamaru sighs. “If we hadn’t sealed him away then…”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “If you hadn’t sealed him away then he would have continued to attack the alliance. Continued to kill people.”

Shikamaru’s mouth is a thin line. “You cannot know that.”

Kakashi grunts, watching Mirai kick her legs, dangerously close to Shikamaru’s crotch. “Yes I can. I had fought Hayate before, and you know it. I have fought a lot of the reanimated ones.” He swallows. “I even laid enemies to rest once more that I had previously killed in life.” 

Shikamaru shoots him a look, but stays silent, leaning in to rub his nose over Mirai’s stomach, making her giggle. 

 

Kakashi blinks, and then shifts to face him, one leg drawn up. He keeps his voice soft. “What did you dream, Shikamaru?”

Shikamaru looks away, and then smiles, gently, sadly. “I dreamt that he was alive of course.” His throat clicks as he swallows. “That Kurenai was happy again.”

Kakashi shivers, closing his eyes for a long moment. 

Shikamaru sniffs again, his voice brittle. “What if she won’t be happy again? Ever?”

Kakashi grimaces, and then nods, with a sigh. “I’ll talk to her.”

Shikamaru quirks an eyebrow. “Talk?”

Mirai squeals and Kakashi watches her pull a strand of hair from Shikamaru’s high pony-tail, before sighing. “Yes. She needs to acknowledge it.”

Shikamaru pulls a face. “I don’t think she wants to.”

Kakashi swallows, harshly. “I can imagine. But…” He trails off.

Shikamaru nods, with a grimace. “You’ll talk to her?”

Kakashi nods, too. “Yes.”

 

Mirai squeals.

Kakashi reaches out, tickles her softly, seeing Shikamaru’s expression soften, when she giggles. He quirks an eyebrow, asking on a hunch. “Is that all you dreamt?”

Shikamaru’s expression darkens, immediately, and he averts his gaze for a moment. “Well… I… no.” He looks over at Kakashi and then rolls his eyes, words rushed now. “I dreamt of a simple life, and a good wife, and two kids.” 

Kakashi watches him, for a long moment. “You don’t think that’s possible in this life?”

Shikamaru swallows. “In this life I have to be at Naruto’s side. And yours, likely, though more at his.” He snorts, and then his expression lights up again, just a bit. “Whatever this life will be, it won’t be simple.”

Kakashi blinks, and then snorts, waggling his eyebrows. “Well…”

Shikamaru chuckles. 

Kakashi sobers again, and then sighs, softly, through his nose. “Still. The Godaime chose the way of Healing back then, and I intend to follow it. I know Naruto will, too.” He tilts his head, locks his gaze with Shikamaru’s. “There should be enough time for a wife and kids if that is what you want? Especially since Naruto wants kids as well?”

Shikamaru quirks an eyebrow, and then shoots Kakashi a sly look. “So, how do you feel about that?”

Kakashi snorts, and then answers, from the depths of his soul. “Terrified?”

Shikamaru cackles. Mirai squeals again, hopping up and down, babbling softly, and Shikamaru exhales softly, before leaning forward and enveloping her in a big hug. Kakashi watches the little arms go around Shikamaru’s neck, holding fast for a moment, before she starts to squirm again, and Shikamaru grins, releasing her gently for her to hop up and down on his lap once more. 

He sighs, through his nose. “Do you think they’ll come here?”

Kakashi frowns. “They?”

Shikamaru quirks an eyebrow. “Kaguya’s… clan. The Otsutsuki.”

Kakashi grimaces. “I do not know. I… not right away, maybe? We have only started to debrief her, or, more talk to her, and try to understand her. She said her presence on this world before we sealed her powers would be like a pulse in their consciousness…” He trails off, with a grimace, forcing himself to continue, after a moment. “We will have to prepare for members of her clan arriving, eventually, I guess. And those clan members won’t be… freshly resurrected.”

Shikamaru nods, gravely. “Or weak.”

Kakashi exhales, watching Mirai’s red eyes glow. “No.” He blinks, and then locks his gaze with Shikamaru’s. “But we do not know the future, Shikamaru. We cannot sacrifice our lives to time and not live out of sheer fear of a possible attack.” He clicks his tongue. “They are not of this world, and the distances between worlds are vast.”

Shikamaru exhales. “There should be time. To prepare. To live.”

Kakashi nods. “Yes.” I hope.

 

Shikamaru blinks, and then shoots Kakashi an inquiring look. “Want me to take her while you speak with Sensei Guy?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “No. Let me take her to him as well. I think he’ll love it, don’t you think?”

Shikamaru grins, with a nod. “You’re right. Better prepare for tears though.”

Kakashi grins as well, softly, holding out his arms and Shikamaru helps Mirai clamber back over. He shifts her again to sit in his arm, getting up slowly. “Yeah.” He grins at Mirai, and then at Shikamaru, carefully watching his eyes. “Will you be alright?”

Shikamaru averts his gaze, nodding after a moment, reaching into his jacket for the cigarette lighter, and staring at it for a moment. And then he inhales, deeply, and gets up as well, putting the lighter away again, carefully. Watching Kakashi for a moment before speaking. “Kabuto is dead, isn’t he.”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods. “Yes. Anko killed him.”

Shikamaru’s eyes find his. “And Orochimaru?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. Searching for the correct word for a moment. “Acquiescing.”

Shikamaru grunts, the sound almost a laugh. “I see.” He looks away for a moment. “The resurrections have come to a halt then.”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Apart from Minato and Kushina, yes.”

Shikamaru nods. “You should address that, officially I mean.”

Kakashi nods, too, with a sigh. “Yes.”

Shikamaru steps close, and then reaches up to ruffle Mirai’s hair, a small smile on his lips. 

His tone is firm. “We need to let the past be the past then. Let’s build a world for our kids.” He clicks his tongue. “Present and future ones.”

Kakashi blinks, feeling suddenly quite unmoored. His voice is a whisper. “A worthy goal.”

Shikamaru hums. “A worthy life. Not exactly simple…” He rolls his eyes. “Which is really annoying…” Kakashi chuckles, and Shikamaru grins, for just a second. “Still. I will be happy to live it.”

Kakashi stares at him, for a long moment. “So will I.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“My rival!”

Kakashi snorts, softly, to himself, while entering the room, lifting his free hand, tone deliberately bored. “Yo.”

Guy beams at him, already overflowing with tears. “Ah, Kakashi, the sheer triumph of our youths and powers that have brought turns in this war. And look at us, still here, to celebrate our victory!”

Kakashi chuckles, settling on the bed with his left hip, holding onto Mirai, who stares at Guy with wide eyes. He inhales, deeply, nodding once. “So, how is your youth holding up? How is the foot?”

Guy waves at him, dismissively. “My foot will stay hurt, apparently the destruction was on molecular level. Naruto managed to stop it and heal the other cells, but the ones broken off…” He scoffs, and then lifts his fist, eyes burning. “My bandaged foot is the proof that I, Mighty Guy, opened the eighth gate and survived.” His lower lip quivers. “That is a blessing. And… to imagine that… there is no-one who did before...”

Kakashi swallows, and then chuckles, reaching out to clasp Guy’s shoulder for a moment. “No. There is no-one else like you.” He hesitates, with a sigh. “Your father would be so proud.”

Guy ducks his head, and sniffs, and then reaches up, to clasp his hand, his other hand reaching out to stroke over Mirai’s head. 

His expression sobers, just a bit. “We managed to secure her future.”

Kakashi chuckles, shaking his head when he sees Guy’s quizzical expression. “I was just talking to Shikamaru about that.” He nods. “We did. You did, when you defeated Madara.”

Guy exhales, but then shakes his head. “I did not manage to kill him, despite the eighth gate.” 

Kakashi shrugs. “I don’t think you could have. At that point that black thing was still in him… I don’t think it would have allowed Madara to truly die before Kaguya could take over.”

Guy grimaces, and then shudders, voice dropping. “That was a spooky thing? I only heard, but…”

Kakashi grunts, knowing Guy doesn’t particularly like spooky things. “Yeah, well, it was.” He leans in a bit. “Be glad that you didn’t see it, old friend.” He smirks, but then blinks, with a frown. “A propos seeing…” He clicks his tongue. “I didn’t see your eighth gate after all. I’m sorry.”

Guy chuckles, and then grins, broadly. “I guess I will have to do it again?”

Kakashi grunts, voice heartfelt caustic. “Don’t you dare.”

Guy cackles, but his voice softens. “I hardly remember either. Too bad there are no records of it.”

Kakashi swallows. “Obito… Obito said he’d bear witness. Maybe he recorded it with the sharingan. He could put you into a genjutsu and show you, maybe?”

Guy shivers, and then sniffs, looking away for a moment. “An interesting idea, my friend. It also means… You trust him?”

Kakashi stares at him, softly stroking Mirai’s back, evaluating his feelings on the matter. The bond he knows of. Their complicated, bitter and interwoven past. And, the fact that, despite it all, there is only one answer. “Yes.”

Guy frowns, heavily. “He betrayed you.”

Kakashi clears his throat, looking out the window for a long moment. “You don’t particular like him.”

Guy’s tone carries nothing of his usual exuberance, the tone flat. “Mourning him, mourning them, it cut you deeply, again and again. I had to watch it happen. I watched it happen, again and again.”

Kakashi grimaces, lowering his gaze. “You think it would have been different, if he had been here?”

Guy’s tone is almost hard. “Yes.”

Kakashi blinks, rapidly, raising his eyes to Guy’s, tone wobbly. “I don’t deserve you.”

There is a small pause, and then Guy’s eyes fill with tears once more, the feeling returning to his voice. And the hand squeezes Kakashi’s hard. “My rival.”

 

Kakashi bends down, with a small chuckle, and hugs him, carefully not squishing Mirai between them. 

 

Mirai, who pushes her little face close to them, babbling on, until they both can chuckle once more. 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He enters the florist shop, quietly, after having Mirai dropped off with Kurenai once more. 

Kurenai, who had taken one look at him, and then had pulled a face, her voice low. “I know. I know, I know.” She had looked away. 

Kakashi had exhaled, and had left it at that. 

For now.

 

 

He watches Ino for a moment, watches the broad and vaguely forced smile with which she serves another couple. Watches the smiles on their faces echo hers.

He rolls his shoulders.

 

“Sensei Kakashi!” Ino’s broad smile breaks for just a moment, with a bit of horror. “I mean… I… General Kakashi. How can I help you?”

Kakashi grunts, tone deliberately light. “Sensei is totally fine Ino-san.” He blinks. “In fact, I am here to likely perform a, if not the last action as general.”

Ino quirks an eyebrow, her head tilting, the second eye visible for just a second beyond the golden hair. Kakashi wonders for a split second if there is something about the eye that she wants to hide, or if it is simply a preference.

Her voice is chipper again, too chipper. “I see. Anyway I can help.”

Kakashi nods, turning towards a dahlia and ghosting his fingers over the petals. “Have you recovered?” 

Ino blinks. “I… yes, I believe so, Sensei. Luckily we were not employed much during the main event on that battlefield.”

Kakashi hums, turning back to her. “I want you to connect me to all the Konoha population.”

Ino blinks, and then raises her eyebrows, blinking. “Would… would my father not be suited better for that task? He could even amplify it to beyond the village limits?”

Kakashi weighs his head, looking at her for a long moment. “You were brought to me by Genma and the others, and you managed to take over the 10 tails’ embodiment, saving us all.” A blush creeps over her face, and he continues, with a gentle smile, careful to let it be heard in his voice. “We’re on the brink of a new era, Ino-san. I wish to start it via the new generation.”

There’s a shiver of sensation, and Kakashi tilts his head back, just the tiniest bit, feeling the approach, like an impression on his soul.

Ino stares at him, for a moment, and then ducks her head, with just a moment. “I see.” A slow smiles spreads, and she smirks, her eyes flitting to a point behind Kakashi. “I… heard of others that there were a lot of interesting events during the final battle. It seems that some of the rumors are indeed true.”

 

Kakashi grunts, with a bit of a grimace, opening his mouth to ask, but Kushina is faster, her clear voice carrying amusement. “What rumors?”

Ino blushes, heavily, stammering, while her eyes flit over to the side for a moment. Kakashi just knows that that is where Minato is standing at.

Ino stammers. “I… just…”

Minato’s voice is soft, but carries a grimace. “About me?”

Kushina steps up, grinning up at Kakashi for a moment, before her gaze returns to Ino. “Or about us.”

Naruto pipes up, and Kakashi can hear the roll of eyes. “I bet it was about Kakashi and me.”

Ino’s uncovered eye find’s Kakashi‘s, in slow motion. 

He sighs, just a bit dramatically. “It’s alright. And no reason to hide anything from…” He hesitates, for a long moment, and then blinks, trying to quip, though his words are breaking a bit on the words. “From my future in-laws.” His gaze shifts, to Kushina’s for a long moment, while his voice fades, echoing somehow. 

He cannot think.

 

Kushina’s gaze is dark, and gentle, and fathomless deep. 

Understanding, all too well.

 

There’s depth to that gaze though, depth he knows carries a multitude of emotions. 

 

He swallows. 

 

Ino shifts on her feet, obviously uncomfortable. “I… see.”

Kakashi nods, and then sighs, clearing his throat and refocusing his thoughts with an effort, addressing Kushina. Naruto’s presence is burning his back. “Why are you here?”

Kushina nods at the two blonde men still standing behind Kakashi. “Naruto wanted to show us around. Would you like us to leave?”

Kakashi frowns, and then turns to shoot Naruto and Minato a look. “No? Why would I?” He blinks, shooting a look at the space behind them. “Where’s Sasuke?”

Naruto speaks up, voice carefully chippery-neutral. “With Itachi. Apparently Itachi wanted to talk to him for a while, so…” Naruto shrugs. 

 

For a moment, their eyes catch.

 

It’s not a punch to the stomach, more like a thrum, passing back and forth, but it is enough to make Kakashi’s heartbeat stumble. He tries to swallow the feeling down, keep some fucking countenance. I wonder if it is the same for him. This intensity. 

 

Minato moves forward, just a bit, dispelling the thought. “You are of the Yamanaka clan?”

Ino clears her throat, and then bows slightly, with a faint blush. “Yes, Yondaime.” She looks back up, and then blushes even more strongly, and then whispers, loudly, to Kushina. There’s a note of frustrated amusement in Ino’s tone. “Forgive me, Kushina-san, the images don’t do him justice?”

Kushina snorts, and then moves forward to hug Ino, for just a second. 

She whispers loudly as well, tone conspirational. “Right?”

Kakashi watches in fascination as both women giggle at each other, Ino still a bit embarrassedly, while Minato just looks on, obviously not too bothered by the display, and not too embarrassed either, but also obviously resigned. Obviously used to people reacting with blushes to him.

And Kushina… is obviously used to it, too.

Enjoys it even.

 

Is definitely secure enough in their relationship to just enjoy it. Tease him with it, too. 

Despite everything that has transpired these last days. 

Despite what he told her.

 

Kakashi blinks, and turns his head to look at Minato, mentally taking a step back. 

Tries to look past the rose-colored memories of his child-self, past the jutsu-misdirected crush he’d had. Past the years of guilt and depression, and repression. 

 

Past the recent events, and their complicated past.

 

Looks at the fine profile, the almost porcelain complexion that is nonetheless darker than Kushina’s. The blond hair, untamed and not held by a head-band now, that frames the light blue of the eyes so beautifully. The strong lines of his throat, and the generous mouth that can smile so warmly. That can also set into a thin line, when Minato locks his feelings.

 

He blinks, shifting his gaze to Naruto, who is also looking at Minato, with a grin. 

Looks at the profile he has known for years as well, has dreamt about, has felt even, under the tips of his fingers. Under his lips.

 

Takes another step back, mentally, carefully. 

 

Naruto’s complexion is the same as Minato’s, as is his face shape, though it’s width and upper jaw and temple shape resemble more that of his mother. His shade of blond is just the tiniest bit darker, warmer, though Kakashi has a feeling that might have to do with shadows and light incidence too, and the fact that it does not frame his face. 

Naruto has the same dark blond lashes, mirroring his unique whiskers, just dark enough to frame the eyes generously, but light enough to give them a glow. The brows shape up like Kushina’s, but their slant is like Minato’s. His forehead seems similar to his father’s, too. 

The blue of his eyes is deeper somehow, a depth in them that Minato does not have, but the highlights are the same, and they seem to pull at him, invite him. They’re shifting too, somehow, in the light, the collarette freckles seemingly moving. The limbal ring is thin, but prominent, making the blue even stronger in contrast.

He wants to drown in them, but he blinks, with an effort, shifting his attention.

The shape of the nose is Minato’s, but the slant of the eyes, and the eyes themselves are more like Kushina’s. There’s one dimple, that is almost hidden beneath the middle whisker. The jaw is a mixture from both, strong, yes, but also seemingly fragile, a touch of femininity to Naruto’s features that Minato is missing, despite the fact that his chin is stronger. Probably due to the fact that his throat is more slender.

Kakashi smiles softly, letting his gaze travel, the ears obviously his, while the ear lobe is attached like hers. 

Father and son are only an inch or so apart, in height, and Kakashi blinks, remembering it was the same a year ago, to him. I bet you’ll get another last growth-spurt though, soon. In a little while. I bet you’ll be taller than us both. 

He smirks, softly, absentmindedly watching the lips move, the lips he can almost taste. 

The lips hiding the white teeth that change in appearance, at times. The shape of them is curved and full, but not too wide, the lower lip fuller than the upper, and the color of them is deep, as Minato’s. The cupid’s bow, that begs to be kissed, the dip slightly deeper than Minato’s. He blinks, remembering Naruto against that tree, and then tearing his thoughts away, with an effort, while realizing that they’re all staring at him, in various degrees of amusement.

And Naruto’s eyes are dark now, so dark.

 

(>> and the matching post, as well as the matching Minato!!!)

 

 

 

He clears his throat, croaking. “What?”

 

Ino smirks at him, while Kushina reaches out to rub his back. “I… you wanted to connect to the Konohan army?”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, refusing to look at Minato and Naruto, whose gazes he can feel. “I, err… yes.” He inhales, deeply, and then shakes his stupor off, with an effort. 

He nods at Ino. “Would you?”

Ino blinks, eyebrows rising. “Now?”

Kakashi exhales, and then nods once more. “Yes. I don’t think this should fester any longer. And it should be fast.” He hesitates, and then looks at Naruto, enjoying the thrum this time, deliberately. “Would you like to transmit something, too, maybe?” Kakashi grins softly. “I heard you wanted to become Hokage after me?”

Naruto grins, quickly, and then steps forward, just a bit, to stand in front of Kakashi. “I… maybe I should repeat what I’ve told you?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, nodding once. “Good idea?” He looks at Ino. “Could you?”

Ino blinks, and then shrugs, raising her hands in her customary concentration seal. “Of course.”

 

Kakashi shifts, planting his feet more firmly, watching Naruto do the same with a small frown.

 

The connection comes, with a punch to the mind. 

 

Ino’s voice echoes, through time and space and reality. “General Kakashi. You are connected.”

 

Kakashi’s eyes close, unseeing, projecting what he has dwelt on, low-key, in the back of his mind, for a few days. “Friends, colleagues and family, I wish to welcome you back home. After months and months of preparations and the threat of death hanging over us all, we have managed to wage this war within a mere two days. That, in and by itself, is glorious, and I wish to congratulate and thank you. But, even more importantly, you all managed to keep our losses at a minimum, and though we will mourn the friends and family we have lost, we have also managed to once more choose the way of healing to end this conflict.

He hesitates, feeling the presence of thousands of people’s attentions. “This way of healing won’t be easy. Forgiveness does not come easy. Letting go of the lingering regret of the perfect dream… won’t be easy. But it will be real. And possible, which is more than I had feared would be within our reach.

Naruto’s hand finds his, and Kakashi links their fingers, letting the rush of emotions come, flow through him. “Tomorrow, we will mourn those we have lost. In time, we will heal, and recuperate, and then move forward. Not forgetting, never that, but building a worthy future.” He hesitates, smelling tobacco for a moment. “One that is bright, for our children.

Naruto’s fingers squeeze his, for a long moment. His thoughts are light, burning somehow, interjecting with the confidence of truth. “Shinobi are trained, from young age. Often we are called tools, but we are not. Or, not in the way that we often are supposed to be. I… I will choose this path of healing. I am choosing this path of healing. Because it is strength. Not fighting all the time does not mean I, or we, are weak. Or will become weak. It does not mean we will stop to train. There might be fights in our lifetime still. And we need to be prepared for those.” He hesitates, his thumb stroking over Kakashi’s. “But I don’t want to regret anything. I want to live, experience everything.

 

For a moment, Sasuke is in Naruto’s thoughts, and Hinata, and then all his other friends, and his parents, and acquaintances. And Kakashi, the flash of himself in Naruto’s perception a punch that hooks itself into his heart.

Sobers him, brutally.

Cuts him deeply, too.

 

The skin where Naruto touches him burns.

 

Kakashi shivers, the depth and intensity of this desire, this need for the future a livid, twisting thing. 

 

Naruto’s little but deliberate and yet sad smirk is clear, in everyone’s mind. “I never wanna think I SHOULD have.

Kakashi hesitates, and then adds, addressing Naruto, Minato, Kushina and everyone listening, knowing Iruka and Obito are, too. Knowing they all know what he means. “We never should need to think we should have. Let us just do it. Let us just live, and shape the future, together.” He adds, so softly he knows it can be felt across the link. “Thank you.”

 

He reopens his eyes, staring unseeing at Ino, who severs the connection with a sigh, her arms lowering. There’s a ringing in Kakashi’s mind, like the absence of sound, as if made audible by a tinnitus.

Kakashi repeats, verbally this time, still unseeing. “Thank you.”

Naruto’s finger strokes over his skin.

 

There is a pause, as everyone seems to regroup. 

 

Eventually Kushina speaks up, with a small, wry smirk, though there is a sense of urgency around her that Kakashi recognizes, from back then. Oh oh. Emotional explosion, incoming. He smirks, just a bit. 

Kushina reaches up to rub Kakashi’s upper arm, while her eyes fall down onto Naruto’s and his linked hands, voice shivering. “That was a good speech, Kaka-kun.”

Kakashi snorts, and then shakes his head when she quirks an eyebrow. “Nothing. Just that only Iruka calls me that, and I…” He trails off, with a small shrug.

Minato speaks up, stepping over to embrace Kushina with one arm. “Iruka, hmm. You’ve mentioned him before.”

Right. Kakashi grimaces just a bit, opening his mouth to respond while seeing Ino perk up from the corner of his eyes, but Naruto is faster, happily babbling now. “Sensei Iruka, my academy teacher. He was one of the first to believe in me. He gave me my head band. He went and protected me, with his life, when everyone else was still shunning me.” Naruto giggles, eyes flashing, while his fingers squeeze for a moment. “He would get so funnily unnerved at times we annoyed him on purpose.” His eyes find Kakashi’s for a moment, words still filled with laughter. “I hope you didn’t bear the grunt of that?”

Kakashi grunts, noncommittally. 

Deciding now might not be the best time to rap Naruto over the head.

Naruto continues after a moment, eyes still on Kakashi’s for a long second, before he turns his head to look at his Dad. “He and Sensei Kakashi were a couple for a while. When I did not have a family, and when I did not have friends, he was always there for me. I sometimes imagined they would adopt me… and I always imagined I would ask him to be… my step-in-father at my wedding.”

 

Silence, as the words sink in.

 

Kakashi blinks, trying to breathe, squeezing Naruto’s fingers for a moment.

He can see Ino stare to the ground, unseeing. Probably remembering, how it was, then.

 

Minato eventually clears his throat, with a nod. “Well, we do not know the future, Naruto. Maybe he will still be, since we…”, he hesitates, looking at Kushina for a moment, who smiles at him, gently, before continuing. “Since we do not know how much time we have been given.” He leans forward, just a bit. “And I would really love to meet the man you deemed worthy to take my place?”

Naruto grins, gently as well, just the tiniest bit wobbly, and nodding wildly. “Well, yes, we have to, I mean he and Obito are bonded, and we really have to find ways to handle that, too, right?”

Kakashi isn’t sure, but he thinks he has never seen Minato this nonplussed. 

Minato’s voice carries something Kakashi cannot place. “He and Obito are… bonded?”

Kushina blinks, looking up at him. 

Naruto frowns. “Yes, why?”

Kakashi looks over to Ino, who is staring at them now, wide-eyed. He sighs. Probably already getting the proverbial popcorn. Although, all things considered, this might be the best course of action. Not making a secret out of it… It’s nothing one can run from after all. He huffs, softly. And I know that. 

He refocuses on Minato once more as he speaks up, with a bit of a shrug. “I just… that was fast?” He grimaces, looking at Kushina. “It’s just that this memory is so…” He blushes, spectacularly. 

Kushina hums, playfully, helpfully. “Fresh?”

Minato grimaces. “…Yes?”

 

Naruto frowns. “Memory?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes at him, tugging at their linked hands to make Naruto look at him. 

He raises his eyebrows, prompting. “The kiss?”

“Ohhhhh.” A slow grin spreads over Naruto’s face. “Right.” The grin turns salacious. “Do I get details?”

Minato, Kushina and Kakashi speak up, in unison. “No.”

Naruto’s face falls, with a stubborn pout. “So not fair.”

 

 

Kushina’s hands fly up to her mouth, and she ducks her head and there is this pause… and then the excitement breaks its way out of her with giggles and exuberance, arms and hair flying wildly for a moment, and Kakashi stares, memory of similar instances and reality clashing wildly.

 

Kushina’s voice is loud, and uncaring. “Oh my god, but this all is so funny somehow, too?” Her now wide eyes find Naruto’s, her voice dropping to a loud, conspiratorially whisper. “I have been trying so hard to hold back a bit, because I remember how Sensei Mito could get at times and I was embarrassed as hell back then too, but….” The hands go up again, in fists, and she hops a bit up and down. “But I cannot hold back any longer?? I mean this is like all my birthdays rolled in one?” 

One of her hands flies out to hold Naruto’s cheek for a moment, the eyes positively glowing. “I can touch you, my son.” Her eyes fill with tears, but she smiles broadly, while Naruto sniffs. “I left you there, on that slab, praying and hoping…” She sniffs, too, her smile wobbly, but then she squeals, her eyebrows raising. “And now I’ve been skipped forward to you all grown and powerful and beautiful and you’re in love, and”, she tilts her head to Kakashi, voice breathlessly unapologetic, “and I’m sorry, I know it’s complicated Kaka-kun, and I know it’s been hard”, Kakashi grunts, not really trusting his voice right now, “but it’s also like the best thing?! Knowing you are here, now, and that you are bonded to one of the best out there,”, Kakashi looks away, for a long moment, trying to keep his emotions in check, “while also experiencing a first love, a first crush, all these first times that are so important???”

Her hands come up to press against her heart, clenched. Waggling her eyebrows, her tone so over the top it makes Kakashi grin. “And now I got to learn that Minato here had a first time also, and we didn’t know it?” She snickers.

Silence, as Minato stares at her, coloring spectacularly, but his gaze carries a lot of amused lenience, echoed in the way he answers her after a moment, drily. “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, honey.”

Kakashi snorts, unable to help himself. 

Kushina grins, tongue between her teeth, triggering another deja-vu for Kakashi. Winking at Naruto. “Maybe you should have a father-son talk about that. I mean you missed all those uncomfortable sex talks?”

Naruto’s voice is a yell. “Mooooooommmmm???”

Kakashi starts to chuckle, helplessly. 

Two sets of blue eyes turn on him, one with indignant outrage, and one with resigned amusement. 

Minato clicks his tongue. “See, Kakashi, the dam is broken. And she tried so hard to tone it down, as I am sure you are well aware.”

Kushina huffs, throwing her hair, while pushing her hands on her hips “She is right here, darling.”

Minato quirks an eyebrow, holding out his arm for her, and she steps into it the embrace, with a grin. His voice is soft. “And how could I ever forget.” He leans down to kiss her, totally uncaring of their audience, and both Naruto and Kakashi hastily look away, their eyes catching for a moment.

 

The palm of their hands feel hot, almost feverish. 

 

There’s this pull, that is almost impossible to resist.

 

 

 

Kakashi can feel Ino’s attention, like a lead weight.

Seeing everything.

 

 

Kushina sighs, breaking the kiss, grinning up at Minato, and then steps forward, to hug Naruto, who drops Kakashi’s hand in the process, the absence of it like a missing limb.

Her voice carries her amusement. “So, yes, with everything that’s happened… I’m sure that we will discuss it all in time. After all it seems that all our paths are very much entwined?”

Naruto rolls his eyes with a small grin, but nods, with a shrug. “Alright.” 

His stomach rumbles, and Minato chuckles, tone dry. “I see your body demands sustenance.” He hesitates, and then adds, with a small grunt. “Again.”

Naruto shrugs. “Yeah, well, I’ve always eaten a lot.”

Kakashi hums. “Must be the fox.” Or the adaptive powers of your cells. 

Naruto grins. “Probably. Though he’s mostly dozing right now.” He gently pats his stomach. “He’s like a cat like that.” He frowns, and then giggles, loudly. “No, I did not call you a cat.”

Minato smirks, and then sobers, tone wistful. “It is good to see some of the old wounds heal.”

Kakashi nods. “Indeed.”

 

For a moment, Minato’s eyes find his.

 

Kakashi sniffs, and then nods, tilting his head to the door. “I still need to see the Godaime. You have fun at Ichiraku’s.”

Minato’s tone is dry. “Are there other restaurants, too?”

Kakashi chuckles. “Oh yes.” He grins, shooting a look at Naruto, who is looking decidedly non-apologetic. “Not that you’ll see much of them.”

 

Kushina hooks her arm through Naruto’s elbow and starts walking towards the entrance with him. 

Calling back over her shoulder. “Kakashi, why don’t you come by for lunch tomorrow? Maybe we and Kaguya can talk a bit?” She shares a look with Minato, who nods. “And bring the Godaime as well.”

Naruto pipes up, looking at her. “Should I be there, too?”

Kakashi grunts. “Maybe later. You should enjoy your free time. I have… plans for you.”

Naruto’s eyes snap to his. “Plans?”

Kakashi smirks, just a bit meanly. “Oh yes.”

Naruto narrows his eyes, obviously hearing something in his tone. “Sensei?”

Kakashi’s grin turns a bit more real. “Later, Naruto.”

 

Minato leans in, asking very quietly, while watching Naruto and Kushina open the door. “Plans?”

Kakashi shrugs, voice almost inaudible. “If he wants to become Hokage he has to become a Jonin at least. Long story. Though I think Kaguya’s information will be very valuable, we can give him that information later.”

Minato hums, and then nods, starting towards the door. “Very well.”

 

Kakashi watches him leave, the feeling that he is discussing Naruto and state business with Minato on eye-level a very weird one.

Especially since Minato is now more Naruto’s age, than Kakashi’s.

 

 

Suddenly Naruto comes back, for just a moment, skidding to a halt in front of Kakashi, and leaning in, his eyes glowing. The whisper carries excitement, amusement, and something Kakashi cannot place. “Oh, I just wanted to tell you that I like your looks, too”, Naruto hesitates, locking their gazes, his voice dropping to a breathy sigh. “Sensei.”

 

Shivers, lodging deep, deep down in Kakashi’s gut.

He tries to breathe, knowing Ino is watching. 

Knowing they are watching, too.

 

 

Naruto grins, tip of his tongue between his teeth for just a moment and is gone, and Kakashi stares after him for long minutes, and then starts to chuckle, softly, to himself, while walking out the door, and into late afternoon sunshine.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“So, you have made a speech, with Naruto, to the whole of the Konohan army, after staring totally besottedly at Naruto, and then talking to Minato and Kushina about a kiss?” Tsunade waggles her eyebrows, looking mightily done, feet propped up on the low table in front of the couch but there’s a grin on her face, and levity in her expression.

Kakashi grunts. “Well, I wouldn’t call it besotted, but…”

Tsunade chuckles, her shoulders shaking. “Well, Ino’s words, apparently. It’s only taken two hours to get round village and even to me.” She quirks an eyebrow. “Speaking of which. Didn’t you want to come by after that speech?”

Kakashi sits down next to her, on the couch, leaning back, and looking at the darkening sky. “I am here now?”

Tsunade hums, turning sideways a bit to watch him. “Mh hmm. And where were you?”

Kakashi blinks, staring unseeing at the sky. It takes a while to shape the words. “At the cemetery. I needed to… realign.” 

Tsunade nods, once, her voice soft. “Say goodbye to the mourning?”

Kakashi snorts, but he swallows, resisting the urge to cross his arms. “In a way. It was such a huge part of my routine, of my life…” He swallows, his voice dropping to a whisper, allowing the realization. “I am floundering a bit… it’s only been these few days, but there’s been no time to process, to think, and so much has happened.”

Tsunade hums a gain, silent this time. 

 

She clicks her tongue eventually. “A propos happened.”

Kakashi grunts, shooting her a sidelong look. “What, now? Really?”

She rolls her eyes, but nods. “Yes and no. Yes, I want to step down.” Her expression sobers, just a bit, grows wistful. “I think I have earned my remaining time.” She swallows. “At least now I have.” Her eye flicker away for a moment. “It’s time I go and find a way to tell him what kind of job he pushed at me back then.”

Kakashi swallows, and then hums. “You really think you can find… him?” Whatever he might be now.

Tsunade weighs her head. “Fukasaku will show me where it happened. If Jiraiya really drew massively on nature energy while sinking down into the depths, there will be traces. The toads are much more sensitive to that than any of us humans, even Naruto. They said they only didn’t go and look themselves because it is too deep there.” Her eyes find Kakashi’s. “Which is where that Suigetsu comes in. I want to take him along, and offer him a pardon for his help.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “And you want to… retrieve his body? Didn’t you say that there was a toad that behaved strangely?”

Tsunade grimaces. “Yes, and no. If Jiraiya really drew on too much energy he might have transformed… but he should have transformed right into stone, right? But if he drew on so much sen energy that he kept continuously healing though, while sending one of the toads living there…” She shrugs. “It might have been a toad not knowing how to communicate with me. While Jiraiya is still stuck there, held down by the weight of water, in a kind of stasis.”

Kakashi blinks, and then shudders. “A dark, eternal tomb.”

Tsunade’s face sets. “Which is why I have to go and look.” She hesitates. “Before, we didn’t have the means to reach him even if all this turned out to be true. But now… we can.” She smirks, just softly. “Now I can.”

Kakashi exhales, and then reaches up, to rub at his eyes. Refusing to hope. He tries to inflect his voice with humor to take the sting out. “So when do you want to leave and push the hat at me?”

Tsunade waves at him, with her right hand. “Oh, easy, Kakashi. If Jiraiya managed till now he’ll manage for a while longer, and I… need to prepare.”

Kakashi shoots her a look, dropping his hands. “Prepare?”

Tsunade smirks, a bit grimly. “As I’ve said. My chakra pools of the seal have to refill. I almost emptied them completely once more in the fight against Madara. It will take at least 12 weeks to reach the level I need. Maybe more.”

 

Kakashi frowns. “Sakura also possesses these chakra pools?”

Tsunade nods, and then sighs, looking away for a moment. “I know. But I don’t know what we’ll find, and where… It might be that finding him, if he actually can be found, might take a while. Konoha needs Sakura more. This village needs the next generation to face the future. As I said, if he’s there… he’ll be there when I get to him, too. If he’s alive, continuously drawing on energy he’ll be in a kind of stasis.” She chuckles, and then sniffs. “I’ll buy him a drink after.”

Kakashi sniffs, and then nods, slowly. 

He clicks his tongue, tone dry. “So, a few months of freedom still then.”

Tsunade snorts, gently. Reaching out to poke her index finger into his vest. “Which is why I want you to take a vacation, now.”

Kakashi stares at her, flabbergasted. He knows his voice is too loud. “Now? With them, here?” With everything that’s happened? Now? When it’s all so fresh?

Tsunade nods. “Yes. I want you to go and get Sora for the inauguration. She has been a great help keeping an eye out for the kids that have been sent for safety, and she is an asset as a teacher. I doubt she really wants to return, but...” Tsunade grins, leaning in a bit. “I bet she wants to be here, for a while, now?”

Kakashi shivers, and then laughs, once, remembering certain photos, thought to be the only way to see them back then. He sniffs. “Yeah, I bet she wants to be here for a while, too.”

Tsunade hums, her eyes sparkling. “Indeed. And if she’s here you can develop a new lightning style with her. Or reawaken your Sharingan.”

Kakashi grunts, shooting Tsunade a skunk eye. “I see you’ve thought it all out?”

Tsunade’s expression shifts with a shit-eating grin. “Someone has to look out for your well-being?”

Kakashi pulls a face, tone dripping with sarcasm. “By making me Hokage?”

Tsunade chuckles, waving at him again. “Ahhh, Kakashi, no worries. You’ll rock that job.” She sobers, slowly. “Just keep to your team and those you trust. Keep those that will get in your face and tell you the truth around you.” She watches him for a long moment, and then nods at him. “Don’t tell me you don’t have plans.”

 

Kakashi fidgets, looking away. “Some?”

Tsunade smirks. “Mh hmmm.” She leans back. “Tell me of them.”

Kakashi sighs, but keeps his voice soft. “Alright. But only if you tell me of that encounter with Dan I heard about then, after.”

Tsunade swallows. “Alright.”

Kakashi nods, and then leans back a bit more comfortably. 

He hesitates, collecting his thoughts. “I… We need trauma treatment. For adults but especially for kids, too. We need to grow, get interconnected with the other villages. Strengthen this alliance that was forged through need. And we need to get more involved in technology. Though Kaguya is a deeply powerful being there are aspects to their technology that we have to be able to counter. Nanotechnology, biotech. Aviation. I would rather not have another army of zombie warriors come at me, with those black rods, or without.”

Tsunade nods. “Indeed. Worthy goals. What else?”

Kakashi grimaces. “I believe the machine Nagato used to control the Pains is still here somewhere… Naruto should know where. And the ones used to transform the bodies must be in Amegakure. We should try to reestablish the connections with that village, too.” He pulls a face. “Even though they might be even less inclined than any of the others, given history.”

Tsunade grimaces, rubbing over her face, tone bitter. “Yeah, the big wars left it a ravaged ground…” 

Kakashi hums. “And it was always used, too. By us, the Akatsuki through Obito, Madara. We should try to remedy that.”

Tsunade nods, but holds up a finger. “We should. But keep in mind, that as Hokage your responsibility is to this village first.”

Kakashi blinks, hesitating. His voice is a whisper, Iruka’s voice echoing in his mind. “My only real allegiance should be to him, though.”

Tsunade stares at him, and then she sniffs, with a brittle little grin. “Well, then Konoha is in good hands, isn’t it. Since you want to give it to him in prime condition, right.”

Kakashi snorts, angrily wiping at his eyes.

 

He clears his throat. “So. These are my goals. Apart from somehow surviving the drag of the paperwork.” They share a snort and Kakashi sighs, nodding at her. “What did you dream?”

 

Tsunade frowns, staring unseeing into space. “I dreamt… that Konoha was at peace, and everyone was alive… and I was reading a fiction version of the events, all mixed up and twisted round, goofy and slightly wacky and out of place, obviously Jiraiya’s fanfiction version of events.”

Kakashi blinks, and she chuckles, waving her hand at him. “I know, I know.” She rolls her eyes at herself. “My perfect world is sitting in the low afternoon sun, in a perfect world, reading Jiraiya’s books.” She snorts, and then sobers. “Even then he was part of my perfect world…” She works her jaw, mouth set in a thin line for a moment, and then her big hazel eyes lock with his. “And then, when I woke up from that dream… Dan came by.”

Kakashi frowns, tilting his head, his thoughts racing. He keeps his tone soft. “Dan came by?” How exactly? Wasn’t he sealed then? Somewhere else? And if he came by, why wasn’t he reanimated then?

Tsunade nods, with a sniff. “Yes, he… was sealed a ways off. But he always had that jutsu he knew, and that he had never used before, since it was…” She chuckles, shaking her head. “Well, it’s a jutsu which transforms you into pure spirit right away, and you would then have a few moments before you cross the line…” Her expression shatters, slowly. “He developed it, back then, in the war, because he said that if he would ever be captured and tortured… at least he would have a few minutes of control and a means to say goodbye before… and he said he would be able to escape, without feeling the pain.”

She sniffs, with a slight sob, her eyes filled with tears. “Of course it all turned out differently.”

Kakashi reaches out, slowly, takes her left hand. Squeezes it, softly.

She nods, squeezing back, before inhaling deeply. “He came by. He told me that he… is proud of me, that I accomplished his dreams. And that he was sorry he made me feel all these painful emotions.” She cackles, humorlessly, whispering. “I wanted to touch him, so badly.” She swallows. “He also told me to… acknowledge that the bond is broken. That I should… live a bit, still.”

She exhales, shudderingly. “All this time I used my regenerational powers to rejuvenate, continuously, because I… had promised him I would grow old with him.” Her eyes find Kakashi’s. “He told me I could grow old now.” Her face crumbles, and Kakashi moves forward, without thinking, pulling her into an embrace, holding her tightly. 

She shakes in his arms, with quiet sobs, her voice shaking. “And then he left, with a smile, telling me he would go to Nawaki now, and I…”

She falls silent, truly crying now, and Kakashi closes his eyes and lowers his head to hers, gently, just holding, and providing strength. 

 

And his heart bleeds, for her.

 

 

 

Notes:

I really liked Tsunade’s dream… not because of the story told in the book, but the fact that her perfect dream really is sitting at peace at that lake, getting food and drinks, and warm sun, and reading :))) I know some people concentrate on the weird version of events in the book she reads (and that gets told most of the time) but that isn’t actually her dream… and I (personally) liked that distinction a lot. 

Chapter 45: Rebuilding foundations

Notes:

That wasn‘t planned but I blame that Minato art. Kokodraws if you ever read this…. thank you. 😅

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Black clothes flutter, like the feathers of crows in the wind. 

 

Kakashi raises his face, watches the clouds drift, for a long moment, while Tsunade talks. 

 

It is silent, and cold, the smell of the flowers like a thin veil, laid out over them all. 

Naruto is next to him, his presence a flame in Kakashi’s consciousness. 

 

They had gone for black clothes together, once more, sifting through the halls of salvaged clothes, that still need to be cleared out and into proper shops. 

Naruto‘s smile had been bittersweet. 

Kakashi’s fingertips had burned when they’d touched Naruto’s throat, while straightening his collar.

 

Kakashi knows that Sakura had taken Itachi and Sasuke to find appropriate clothes, too.

 

He shoots a look from the corner of his eyes at those three, standing next to Naruto. 

 

 

Itachi’s eyes find his, for a long moment.

 

Kakashi blinks, and then steps forward, as Tsunade calls for him to say a few words as well, and he turns to face them, watching the wind tug at their hair.

Kurenai hugs Mirai to herself, tightly, dark rings under her eyes.

 

Tenzou inclines his head, to look at Yugao, Aiko on his arm.

 

Over to the side, Konohamaru stands with his friends, expression pinched. Staring at Obito, who is trying to vanish into the crowd, next to Iruka. 

Iruka, who had insisted he be here.

 

Behind them, Minato and Kushina. Trying to blend in. And not managing, if the wide space that people form around them is anything to go by.

 

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, and silently prays he’ll find the right words.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Tsunade’s voice is low, speaking his thoughts. “This will take a while to grow together.” She clicks her tongue. “To heal.”

Kakashi hums, nodding at the people coming close to pay their respects, his tone low. “Indeed.” He hesitates, and then adds, on a small sigh. “I just hope they have the time.”

Tsunade hums, and then nods, just a bit. “I have looked at their cells and I have no reason to doubt her word.”

Kakashi nods, while giving an eye-smile to Kikaru, who nods back. “Have you looked at her cells, as well?”

Tsunade hums, eyes watchful behind the veil. “Some. I’ve decided to start with something unobtrusive. I’ve taken some hair from her. Since her biology is close enough to ours to have children with us I figured she would lose some. And sure enough she did.”

Sakura steps up to them, and takes up position next to Tsunade. She inclines her head. “And?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, with a smirk, watching Itachi turn to Sasuke.

Tsunade’s lips twitch. “Aaaand… her cell regeneration is off the charts. I cannot possibly tell how old she is. Even dislodged hair is regenerating, for a while at least.” She opens her mouth to say something else, but sighs instead, shooting a look over to the side, where the elders are standing. She frowns. “The council obviously wants to have a word.” She shoots a look at Kakashi, tone filled with dark humor. “Enjoy your freedom while it lasts. See you later at lunch.”

Kakashi nods, stepping back to let her pass, sighing softly though his nose as he watches her go.

 

Sakura’s voice draws him back. “So, Sensei. What happens now?”

Kakashi smirks, remembering Naruto asking that very same question. “Now we live.” He exhales, and then turns to face her, locking their gazes. “I will need your help in the upcoming years. I wish to set up a system that supports the ones traumatized, whether it be adults or children. The healing must not be simply physical.”

Sakura’s eyes are huge on his, and she nods. “Indeed. We will need personnel and resources. We also need to concentrate on the research to find out what exactly their weapons and skills are made of, since they seem to be at least partly biological weapons.”

Kakashi nods, and then leans in a bit, giving her a deliberately teasing eye-smile. “True. But first, you will teach a bit, at the academy. With Naruto.”

Sakura’s mouth drops open. “What?”

Kakashi chuckles, softly. “No worries, I’ll condemn Sasuke to do the same. Or similar. But I want to… ground you, a bit.”

Sakura’s eyebrows climb up to her hairline. “Ground us?”

Kakashi shrugs. “Mhhh hmmm. All of you need to reconnect with this village, with the skills of those that will be the next generation, while also having the time to find out about your own life, and goals, and desires.” He grins, letting his gaze drift over the people leaving the roof of the Hokage tower now. “You are so far beyond any measurable skills, and that is exactly why your feet have to be firmly rooted to the proverbial ground.” He swallows. “Or you will lose yourself.” His eyes return to Sakura’s. “Besides. The children of this village deserve good role models, don’t you think?”

Sakura blinks, a bit owlishly. “I… err… yes?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, vaguely amused by the haunted expression on Sakura’s face. “That’s settled then.”

 

There’s a shiver of movement, and then Sakura blushes, and Kakashi turns, knowing it is Itachi without needing to look. 

Itachi looks at her, for a long moment, before he addresses Kakashi. “And I, Senpai, should I teach at the academy as well?”

Kakashi hums, with a tilt of his head. “I am unsure. Is this something that you want?” He hesitates, quirking an eyebrow. “No-one else can tell the tale of the Uchiha like you can… except maybe Obito.”

Itachi nods, shooting a look at Obito, who is still standing off to the side, very stiffly. He clicks his tongue. “I am not so sure, whether the parents would welcome me, or us, teaching though.”

Kakashi nods, once, conceding the point. “True.”

The corners of Itachi’s eyes crinkle. “No sugarcoating the point?”

Kakashi sighs, and then shrugs. “This will take a while. You and Obito have history, both of you have history with this village… and I cannot blame the villagers for resenting you. We will have to tread lightly.”

Sakura clears her throat. “When I was younger, we didn’t have a lot of proficient genjutsu users though, to teach me. I mean, I was taught, but…” She trails off.

Kakashi nods. “And that is something Itachi truly excels at.” He grunts, trying for levity. “I can testify.”

Itachi ducks his head, just a bit. “Yes, Kisame did not want to leave. I had to take you out without permanent harm.”

Kakashi nods, with a small smirk. “I know. It is part of the reason why I told Sasuke the truth back then.” He hesitates, and then shrugs. “Still. I will have to clear that with Tsunade and…”, he grins, shooting another look over at Obito. And Iruka. “And Sensei Iruka, likely. If I remember correctly he is the one supposed to be head-master in a while.”

Sakura grins. “Fitting.”

Kakashi echoes the grin. “Indeed.” He hesitates, and then lowers his voice, with a click of his tongue. “If I may, have you… talked?”

Sakura blushes, and then shoots a look at Itachi, who smiles at her, softly. She nods, a bit wildly. “We have, I mean…” She pulls a bit of a face, blushing harder, and then raises her eyes to Kakashi’s bravely. “We have talked about that, Sensei, I…” She swallows. “I’m only about to turn 17, right, we don’t want to rush… I mean I…” She trails off.

Itachi hums, reaching up to softly push a wisp of hair out of her face. “I will wait, however long you will need, or want, to be sure.” He drops his hand again, something vulnerable passing over his face, and then he turns to face Kakashi once more. “This is beyond any of my dreams already.” A smile, quick but true quirks his lips. “I am happy.”

Kakashi hums, and then nods, once. “Alright. So. Where are you off to now?”

Sakura hums, and then ducks her head. “Actually, I wanted to take him to lunch with my parents.”

Kakashi blinks, and then snorts, tone dry. “So. No rush, huh?”

Sakura snickers, but rolls her eyes. “Yeah, well.” She hesitates, and then shivers, her eyes glowing. “I mean you know how it feels, Sensei.” Her grin broadens. “I really want to feel it all.”

“Mhhh hhhhm.” Kakashi grins, for a moment, and then shoots a look at Itachi, who shrugs. Kakashi snorts. “Well, then, enjoy your lunch.”

 

He nods at them and steps back, turning towards Obito and Iruka, who both watch him come closer, silently. For a long moment, Iruka’s dark eyes catch his gaze.

Kakashi exhales through his nose, tone deliberately light. “Are you off to lunch as well?”

Iruka inclines his head just the tiniest fraction, while Obito fidgets. “Yes. We will cook it together. And talk.”

Kakashi hums, seeing Obito look away, obviously not too happy about that prospect. “I see.”

Iruka shoots a look at Obito, and then turns back at Kakashi. “Yeah, I mean, we have like… opened the door, but we need to sweep out all the litter first, so to speak. Clean up.” He shrugs and then levels Kakashi with a look that carries some emotional exhaustion. “I’m going out on a limb on fate’s and your judgment here Kakashi. And you know it.” 

Kakashi swallows, shooting a look at Obito. He nods. “I know.” He tilts his head, waits until Obito locks his gaze with him. Stating. “So do you.”

He doesn’t elaborate further, knowing Obito gets him just fine. Gets the underlaying warning.

Obito nods. 

 

Kakashi clasps his hands, rubs them for a moment, and then sighs, through his nose. “Alright. I need to go to lunch now, too.” He hesitates, lowering his voice. “That will be interesting as well.” He watches Obito look over to Minato for a moment, something indecipherable passing over his face. He is on the verge of asking, but catches sight of the expression on Iruka’s face instead, which is a weird mixture of annoyance, amusement, and… jealousy. 

Kakashi blinks, hastily averting his gaze.

And hiding his, somewhat relieved, grin.

 

Obito speaks up, haltingly, eyes unseeing on the dispersing crowd now. “Where is Naruto?”

Kakashi shrugs, and then follows Obito’s gaze, but not seeing his team anywhere. Or parts of his team. “Not sure.” He feels for Naruto for a moment, and then points an arm, waving it, deliberately vague. “Somewhere over there.”

Obito snorts, amusement and surprise mixing to make his voice lighter. “Not driven to be with him?”

Kakashi hesitates and then shakes his head, once. “Always. But it’s…” He hesitates, not knowing how to describe it. Half-quoting, feeling Naruto in his arms for a moment. “Now we live and love, until it is time.”

Iruka blinks at him, slowly. Obito stares.

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “I know how it sounds. I know.” He shrugs. “But it’s also true. And we’ve both…” He shakes his head again. “We’ve both arrived at that state.” He snorts, eyes unseeing for a moment. “Which is such a relief, I cannot possibly tell you.” And it truly is… true.

Iruka blinks at him again, slowly, and then steps forward to hug him, tightly. “Oh god, I’m so glad.”

Kakashi chuckles, hugging him tightly back for a moment. “Thank you.” He draws back, just a bit, pressing his nose to Iruka’s temple. Whispering. “You know that you can always come to me, right? I’ll set him straight if need be.”

Iruka snorts, and then nods, a bit wildly, while withdrawing, with a sniff. “I’ll hold you to it.”

Kakashi hums. “Good.”

 

Obito’s voice is low, and wistful. “You’re beautiful together.”

Iruka blushes, just softly, and then withdraws fully from Kakashi’s embrace, ducking his head a bit. 

Kakashi hesitates and then hugs Obito, too, for a moment. Letting all the relief, and the hope, and the future color his voice. “So are you.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Kakashi!”

 

Kakashi hums, sinking into the offered hug with a sigh, her red hair once more up in a ponytail. His tone is dry. “Are our favorite blondes outside?”

Kushina chuckles, on the tip of her toes, holding fast for a moment before she lets him go again. “They’ve set up lunch on the open porch. It’s Kaguya’s favorite spot.”

Kakashi nods, and then grins at her, for a moment, before toeing off his shoes. He lowers his voice. “How is having her here?”

Kushina weighs her head. “Weird? And interesting? And nice?” She waggles her eyebrows, just a bit, while her hands push into her hips. “Her understanding of the world differs from ours, that much is clear, and she has this vast knowledge deep within her. She says it’s outdated, but I think it far surpasses ours at this point, so whatever we can get from her will be helpful.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, nodding. “If she’s willing.”

Kushina quirks an eyebrow. “Oh, she’s willing. If you keep her entertained. It’s a give and take for her. Dwelling on the past seems not something she is overly keen on, so she demands knowledge of the questioner in return.”

Kakashi grimaces and then nods. “Fair’s fair I guess.”

Kushina nods. “Yes. That’s what Minato said, too. They’ve been talking a lot.” 

Kakashi blinks, hearing something in her tone. “You haven’t?”

Kushina sighs, and then rolls her shoulders. “I’ve listened. I mean, it’s only been a few days now, right?” She pauses, lowering her voice even more. “You know how Minato can get so stuck in his own head he needs to get dragged out of it?”

Kakashi blinks, shooting her a slightly amused look. 

She rolls her eyes. “Well, he can be. It’s how he is able to lock his emotions away so tightly at times. Anyways, it’s my job to drag him back down to earth. And drag him out to actually spend time with our son, because that is what we’re here for.” Something stubborn enters her features. “We’ll help with the other stuff, too, but we’re here for Naruto.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, and then leans in, to hug her again, for a split second. “As you should be.”

 

Kushina nods, and then steps back, tilting her head. “So. Are you hungry?”

As if on cue Kakashi’s stomach rumbles, and he chuckles, softly. “I guess I could eat?”

Kushina tilts her head, narrowing her eyes. “When did you eat last?”

“Errr….” Kakashi pauses, and then grimaces. “I guess yesterday?” He vaguely remembers instant onigiris, during plannings and meetings. But so much is happening. I guess I forgot.

“Mhh hhhmmm.” Kushina turns, hooking her arm through his to drag him along. “Food coming right up.”

 

 

Minato lifts his head and smiles at him, when they cross the threshold, and Kakashi’s heart stumbles, for in instance, the vision so utterly surreal he feels out of body for a moment. 

Kaguya next to him blinks, her weird, bell-like voice suffused with feelings. “The lines of fate around the three of you are so intricate and beautiful. A gift to witness.”

Kakashi blinks, and steps over, sending a small eye-smile at Kushina before settling between Kaguya and Minato, at short distance from the low table laden with various dishes before him. He blinks. “Do you… actually see those lines?”

Kaguya weighs her head, the long, white hair shifting. “It is a combination of what all three of my eyes see… and the sensation of chakra as you can also feel it. In my mind, I can find shadows of the lines fate has woven.”

Kakashi frowns. “I see.” He clicks his tongue. “Do you think fate is an entity?”

He can see Minato tilt his head, from the corner of his eyes. Kushina takes her place next to him. 

Kaguya smiles, brilliantly, the sharp teeth flashing for just an instant. Kakashi shivers watching them. “Fate latches onto our souls, and then yearns for something to complete them. Fate changes the very makeup of our physical existence when we meet someone who might, forming the bond. Fate is that what happens when we change the threads of reality.”

Kakashi stares at her, trying to make sense of it. 

Minato speaks up, tone carefully neutral. “So in your opinion we actually make the bond engage ourselves, because we recognize that which we miss?”

Kakashi cannot breathe. What? That… 

Kaguya hums, reaching for a cup of tea. “Yes and no. It is not a choice, per se, but it is something that happens because we enter a candidate’s proximity.”

Kushina clicks her tongue, reaching for her own cup. “A candidate’s?”

Kaguya nods. “For some, there are options. For others, not.”

Kakashi swallows, feeling feverish, tone dark. “That is why we often find our soul-mates in our proximity. The whole concept wouldn’t work if it was spread over our whole world…”

Kaguya’s pale eyes lock with his. “Fate wants to feed. But it is practical, also.”

Kakashi shivers. “So it is an entity?” Feeding on us? Another… alien?

Kaguya shrugs, elegantly, lightly. “It is beyond your understanding.”

Kakashi pulls a face, feeling dangerously pissed off suddenly.

Kaguya’s left hand comes up, to draw a fingernail through Kakashi’s hair. “Do not be furious at fate, Hatake Kakashi.” She smiles, softly, a brittle, sad, and yet happy little smile. “The risks are high, but so are the rewards?”

Kakashi grunts, not trusting his voice. 

Kushina sighs, and then nods, reaching up to rub her nose for a moment. “That is why bonds have to be acknowledged and can also be acknowledged as broken, isn’t it? Because while fate engages it, and connects it… if we choose to change our paths reality will follow.”

Kaguya nods. “Correct.”

Minato hums, quirking an eyebrow. “But that also means that these bonds… are firmly rooted in reality. It’s nothing superficial, or superstitious. Nothing fake.”

Kakashi swallows, tasting bile. 

Kaguya smirks, just the tiniest bit sadly. “These bonds are very real.” Her face falls, just a bit, pale eyes faraway for a moment. “I am bound into them, just as you are.”

Kakashi exhales, through his nose, trying to let the anger go. “Even now?”

Kaguya hums, and then takes a sip of her tea, before answering. “Even more so now.”

 

There is a short pause, and then Kakashi chuckles, unable to help himself. His tone is vicious. “So, the gist of it is, that if I had only properly chosen to not want this bond, then it would have… what.” He clicks his tongue, unable to look at Kushina and Minato. “It would have chosen another… candidate?”

Kaguya blinks at him, and then smiles, just softly. “But there is no other candidate for you, Hatake Kakashi. And your soul knows it.”

Kakashi looks away, blinking rapidly. 

Kaguya continues, her gaze a lead weight. “For some, that assessment may hold true, though most do not find it within themselves to reject a match. But for you…” 

Kakashi snarls, behind his mask. “Why not for me?” Or him? Why did fate choose to make us suffer so much?

Kaguya smiles, gently. “I have told you, child. You are the one where the threads connect. A waypoint in this intricate net.” 

Kakashi swallows, unable to speak.

Minato speaks up for him, after a moment, asking the question Kakashi is unable to form. “And Naruto? What about him? How is he connected… in this net.”

Kaguya hesitates, looking away, obviously trying to find the right words. When she speaks again, she seems to be citing. “He is what keeps reality from fading, his waypoint directing this future.”

Kushina quirks an eyebrow, eyes narrowed. “So what you’re saying is… if Naruto weren’t here, now, with Kakashi, then…” She trails off.

Kaguya smirks, softly, and then nods, once. “If Naruto would reject the bond… or if Kakashi would… then your reality would fail. Your future would fail.”

Minato nods, tone utterly unfazed. “That’s why everyone connected to them feels it, too, isn’t it. We did our very best to make it happen for them, despite it all, on an instinctual level, because we know that it is what needs to happen.”

Kakashi blinks, turning his head to look at him, slowly, reality feeling sluggish.

Minato turns to him, the big, blue eyes filled with sorrow-tinged humor. “Thank goodness you are who you are though, Kaka-kun.”

Kakashi jerks, as if whipped. Unable to form a single thought.

 

Tsunade speaks up, from the door, making them all look up and at her. Her tone carries careful, deliberate amusement. “That is something I have thought before, too. Not many would have been able to give the bond the time it needed. That it needs, still.”

She steps over, and sits down next to Kaguya, who watches her, with a genial expression. 

Tsunade sighs, and then nods, once. “Still. Fate or not. We do feel what we feel, do we not?”

Kaguya quirks an eyebrow. “Yes. And we cannot escape this expression of fate, either.”

Kakashi grunts, in what could have been almost a laugh.

Kushina smirks at him. “Feeling fed up with fate right now?”

Kakashi looks away, and then clicks his tongue, pressing the word out. “Mightily.”

Kaguya hums, tone amused. “But you have also accepted it, long ago. And all that is left now…”

Kakashi closes his eyes, and then nods, with a small sigh, when he reopens them. “Is anticipation. Yes.”

Kushina’s nose crinkles as she grins. Her voice is a loud whisper. “Ohhhhh, the best thing.”

Minato chuckles.

 

Kakashi sniffs, wondering at the ease with which he accepts their presence and support, and then looks up at Tsunade, before he looks over at Kushina and Minato. “You do know that I would have been lost without your support.”

Minato hums, and then reaches out, to clasp Kakashi’s left hand for a moment. “As he would have been, too.”

Kakashi shakes his head. “There were others.” He forces a grin, quipping. “You know, it takes a village…”

Minato’s eyes crinkle, but it is Tsunade who speaks up. “Oh yes. And roughly half a dozen Anbu on rotation to catch him whenever he jumped off the Hokage heads.”

Kakashi grunts, remembering all the extra shifts he put in, too. “Half a dozen?”

Tsunade smirks at him. “I checked. They were all volunteers.”

Kakashi looks away, blinking rapidly. His tone is a bit raw. “I guess I’ll have to get that list and throw them a party.”

Tsunade grins. “You might need to, yes.” Her grin turns salacious. “Do it when you’ve been inaugurated.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, just a bit.

 

Kushina clicks her tongue after a short pause, nodding at the dishes. “I don’t recognize a few of them, what are they?”

Tsunade hums, and then points in the general direction of the table. “Oh, we have intensified the relations with the other villages. I have specifically asked for traditional dishes to be shared, so that people visiting and people going would feel immediately comfortable. It’s only the beginning, but some recipes have been shared, I thought it nice to have them today.”

Kaguya’s tone carries amusement. “Something new and foreign to go with what you know.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Are there Otsutsuki favorite dishes? Ones we could try to cook?”

Kaguya blinks, and then looks at him, for a long moment. 

Finally, she shakes her head. “There were, when we were young, as a species. But when we took to the stars our hunger changed.” Her face darkens, her tone almost inaudible, carried on a sigh. “I think we lost our soul that day. And we have been trying to regain it ever since.”

Kakashi swallows, sharing a quick look with Kushina. “The fruit gives you purpose.” An impression of what you actually yearn for. 

Minato hums, watching her intently. “And a rush to mute the longing.”

Kaguya blinks, and then smiles, sadly. “What I found here muted the longing for a while.” Kakashi watches in fascination as a tear drops, the line down her cheek sparkling in the sun. 

Kaguya inhales, deeply. “And now… they have been reincarnated.”

Kakashi blinks, and then frowns. “About that… they are very much their own persons though, are they not? How exactly does this… reincarnation thing work?” His stomach rumbles, and he grimaces, embarrassedly, sending a thankful look at Tsunade when she just picks up a dish and starts to eat, gesticulating at him to continue. Kushina and Minato follow suit, and Kakashi shrugs, turning back to Kaguya. “I mean, they are not your sons?” Are they?

Kaguya nods, slowly, while reaching for her tea again. “No, they are not. But the very essence of their being is. The intent of their will and purpose. The chakra that has attached to their souls.”

Minato hums, with a frown. “The chakra that has attached to their souls?”

Kaguya nods, with a small smile. “Yes. Have you never wondered how exactly that energy is able to run through your body? And why it differs so much from person to person?”

Kakashi reaches up to pinch the bridge of his nose, while Kushina pushes some fried rice towards him. “But there are jutsus to expand ones pool… like the Godaime uses? And it can be trained to be expanded?”

Kaguya nods, and Kakashi finally takes up the dish, and hesitates, before pulling down his mask. He can see Minato smirk, very softly, from the corner of his eyes. “Yes. But there are limits. And those limits are self-imposed, by the way you let your soul… reach out.”

There is a small pause, and then Minato grins, and smirks down at Kushina. “That explains why you and Naruto have so much of it.”

Kakashi chews on his rice, watching in fascination as Kushina blushes, ducking her head. 

Kaguya sighs, and takes a sip. “But enough of me, and knowledge, for now. Tell me, Kakashi-san, how did your old lover react to your recent one being his bonded?”

 

Kakashi freezes, staring at her, sticks in hand, while trying to ignore the sudden attention of the other three. His voice is a croak, and his face feels hot. “You can see those threads as well?”

Kaguya chuckles, a pealing sound. “Of course.”

Kushina’s voice is a loud whisper. “Oh, do tell, Kaka-kun.”

Kakashi clears his throat, trying to shoot her a skunk-eye, and failing by a mile, if her widening grin is any indication. He tries to sound nonchalant. “Well, Iruka wasn’t too happy given their shared… history.” He frowns, looking down at his dish, trying desperately to deflect, Minato’s gaze a lead weight. “How does that work though, I’m sorry but I have to ask, but how does it work for them, the fact that people’s lives had to be lost for them to arrive at this point?”

Kaguya tilts her head. “You mean how can we latch onto the bond with the history in our minds?”

Kakashi nods, pulling a face. “I guess? I don’t know how else to put it. I mean would they still have been bonded, matched, recognized themselves as candidates, whatever, if that night had not happened?”

Kaguya hums, and then shrugs. “For them, it would not have mattered. Their paths would have converged whatever path they had chosen at one of the crossroads.”

Tsunade interjects, reaching for some meat dish. “Crossroads?”

Kaguya nods. “Decisions that have impact. Like Obito choosing to give Kakashi his eye. Like him choosing to believe Madara. Those are crossroads.”

Kakashi shivers, and reaches for his own tea.

Minato’s voice is very calm, hiding his emotions. “But he would have returned home, whatever crossroad he had taken, do I understand that correctly.”

Kaguya smiles at him, pointy teeth flashing once more. “Yes. Or he would have died.”

Kakashi exhales, shudderingly, his vision blurring. Asking, though he knows. “Because the threads connect with me?”

Kaguya hums, her pale eyes watching him intently. “Yes.”

 

Kakashi closes his eyes.

Unable to say what he feels.

Or feel.

 

Tsunade speaks up after a moment. “We need a drink.”

Kushina’s voice carries her heartfelt agreement. “Oh yes.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Kushina chuckles, walking Kakashi to the door with Minato. “Ah, getting shit-faced this early in the day is still fun.”

Kakashi grunts, trying to keep the world from spinning. He has the vague impression that his speech is slurred, but then his tongue feels twice its size. And he has a slight hiccup. “Usu… usually only Jiraiya would drag me to get drunk… and Iruka of c… course.”

Minato seems steady enough, though his eyes are a bit slitted. “The first time I was insane enough to accept Sensei Jiraiya’s invitation he drank me under the table and I had a headache for three days. And I thought I would die.”

Kakashi giggles, tugging at his mask to pull it up, but abandoning the motion, when he tries to concentrate on the words. “She… she wants to resss… resurrect him.”

Minato grins, a bit lopsidedly. Leaning in to whisper, loudly. “We should team up and drink him under the table then.”

Kakashi bends a bit forward, chuckling helplessly, while swaying. 

Minato reaches out to steady him, and then pulls him in, with a sigh, nestling into an embrace, both stumbling back to lean against the wall. Kakashi exhales, lowering his face to Minato’s neck, holding fast. 

Minato hums. “I am so proud of you, Kaka-kun.” 

Kakashi sniffs, pushing his face into the blond hair. Absentmindedly trying to compare Naruto’s smell and the smell under his nose, and failing, giving up with a sigh, and just feeling home. 

Minato plays with the hair in the back of Kakashi’s head, softly kneading.

His breath tickles Kakashi’s throat. “So. I surmise that you and Naruto have already kissed?”

Kakashi grunts, suddenly feeling hot with how Minato is pressing near. With how Kushina is watching. The fog in his head clears somewhat. “I… he kissed me, on his sixt.. sixteenth birthday, when we visited Jiraiya’s… he kissed me.” He swallows, with a shiver. Whispering. “I almost broke.”

Minato hums, and Kakashi can see Kushina’s eyes crinkle, and he frowns, trying to discern the reason. 

Minato draws back, just a bit. “Kushina and I have been thinking.”

Kakashi swallows, feeling hot and cold, Minato’s face so near impossible to ignore. “Thinking?”

Minato shrugs, just lightly, voice dropping to a whisper. “About crushes, and desires, and time, and rewards… you have been very steadfast.”

Kakashi swallows, feeling light-headed. “Not steadfast enough.”

“Mhhhh.” Minato hums, and then shrugs again. Smirking, softly. “Did your phantasies include me wearing the coat?”

Fuck.

Kakashi’s eyes snap to his, wide and almost panicked, and Minato chuckles, leaning in. His breath his hot on Kakashi’s lips. “We decided we would reward you after all.”

Kakashi whispers, brokenly. “After all?”

Minato nods, just a bit, the heat and reality of him so near its own intoxication. “Yes. After you were so rudely spurned there on that battle field.”

Kakashi grunts, unable to think.

He has a hard time shaping the words. "Do you think this is a good idea?“

Minato hesitates, and then shrugs again, with a little sigh. And a smirk. "I used to think a lot of things were a good idea, and look where they led me?“

Kushina speaks up, shifting so she can look at them both from the side. "We think you actually need that to close that part of the past.“ She bites her lips. "And, since your crush back then was so obvious, and I used to think about it a lot, and I used to tease Minato with it… I do, too.“

Kakashi blinks at her, opening his mouth to exclaim. "Wha…“

 

All thought flees, as Minato’s tongue touches his lower lip. Withdraws, and then touches Kakashi’s tongue. 

 

Kakashi shudders. 

 

Minato sighs. And tilts his head. 

 

Presses in, tongue gliding. 

Kakashi moans, deeply. 

His eyes close, and he sinks into the kiss, unable to do anything else. 

 

The feeling is different to Naruto’s kisses. 

Very different. 

 

Lust slams through Kakashi, with the vicious ferocity of deep, deep denial and repression, unleashed. With the knowledge that this is what he gets, here now. 

There is no promise of beyond and the future to this. 

No helpless falling in love.

 

Just this old, teenage dream, and memory of many a lonely night. And the almost brutal desire that was locked away in the darkness. 

 

It is base, and deep, and wet, and Minato presses in when Kakashi starts to suck on his tongue, starts to roll his hips into the answering hardness. 

 

Kakashi opens his mouth wider, silently asking for more. 

 

Minato obliges him, with a mewling sound, that sends shivers down Kakashi’s spine. 

 

 

And then he withdraws, with little breathless moans, and sighs, and teeth leaving imprints on Kakashi’s skin. 

 

 

Kushina’s voice is breathless. “And now, Kaka-kun, I’m sorry, but you have to leave. Do enjoy the memory of that kiss, you have my explicit permission.” She reaches for Minato, eyes dark. “Because I will, too.”

Kakashi swallows, feeling feverish, the taste running amok on his tongue.

He watches Kushina loop her arms around Minato’s neck as if slow-motion, swallowing compulsively. 

 

And then he snorts, pulling his mask up with shaking fingers, his tone dry beyond measure, and laced through and through with feeling.

 

“Mahhhh, I am glad you are back.”

 

 

And Minato snickers into her mouth, and Kushina moans, and Kakashi vanishes, with a giggle.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Naruto sits there, in front of his door, once more. 

 

Kakashi puffs into space before him, swaying a bit, and still grinning… and still tasting Minato. 

And still half-hard. 

 

He has the vague and fleeting thought that meeting Naruto now, in the state he’s in, is probably not the best idea. 

Though he’s dying to compare. 

I wonder how it would feel to sink into your kiss now. How would you taste?

His heartbeat picks up, and he clears his throat, turning to the door when Naruto gets up, shifting to hide himself. 

 

Though apparently it’s a lost cause to hide his current state, since Naruto blushes, furiously… and stares. 

 

Kakashi unlocks his door, feeling a bit out of body. 

 

Naruto’s voice sounds… weird. "Where were you, … Sensei.“

Kakashi exhales, absentmindedly noting the small pause, and the way his heart stumbles. "With your parents. For lunch, you know?“ And a bit more.

Naruto narrows his eyes. "With my parents?“

Kakashi swallows, and then tries to shrug nonchalantly. "There were some… revelations?“

Naruto echoes, frown etched into his skin. "Revelations.“ He follows Kakashi inside, closing the door and leaning against it. "What kind?“

Kakashi inhales, looking at the futon mat and the two plants, and then turns, a whisper of stubbornness entering his features. Telling. "The crush kind.“

Naruto blinks. Still frowning. "Meaning?“

Kakashi narrows his eyes. Suddenly wanting to tell, too. 

He smirks, his heart beating in his throat. "Well, if you must know your father kissed me. Because I used to have a huge crush on him. And, well…“ 

He spreads his arms, looking down at himself pointedly, and then giving Naruto a deliberate eye-smile. "It was a really good kiss.“

 

Naruto’s face darkens, considerably. 

His jaw works, and there’s a hint of a pout on his lips now. "You weren‘t aroused when you kissed me?“

Kakashi blinks, hearing the underlying accusation in the clipped tone. And noting that for all the things to latch onto… this is what pisses Naruto off. 

He looks away for a moment, gentling his tone. "I was trying the hell not to be.“

Naruto sniffs, looking away. He crosses his arms. "Why?“

Kakashi tries to catch his gaze, to no avail. "You know why.“

Naruto scoffs. 

 

Kakashi clicks his tongue. Wondering at himself, but unable to stop himself, the tone salacious. "Trust me, when we get there that won’t be a problem.“

Naruto snorts, darkly. 

Still looking away. 

 

Kakashi lets his gaze drift down, noting the tense body language. He closes his eyes for a moment. "I suppose I should be flattered and happy that you’re jea…“

Naruto’s head whips round, with a hiss. "I‘m not jealous!!“

Kakashi blinks, and then ducks his head, to hide his grin. "Alright.“

He lifts his head again, locking his gaze with the furious blue, the still simmering arousal deep within him turning back up a notch. Images flit through his brain, possibilities, and he banishes them, with a sigh. And an effort. "So, what now?“

Naruto‘s eyes flash, tone acerbic. "Now I‘m gonna go and tell him off. You’re mi…“ He trails off, flushing furiously, while Kakashi is getting hot under his skin. 

Kakashi clears his throat. "Yeah, well, do wait a bit with that, because I think they’re… busy.“

Naruto pulls a face, expression pinched. "Busy?“

Kakashi raises his eyebrows. 

Naruto colors even deeper. "Oh.“

 

Kakashi clears his throat. "Yeah, well, apparently your Mom thinks we’re hot.“

Naruto snorts, looking away for a moment, the heat in his eyes vaguely different when he looks back. "Well, I can empathize.“ He licks his lips, his eyes darkening. "I mean I started practicing the reverse harem because you and Iruka were hot to imagine, too.“

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long, long, long moment. 

His voice is scratchy. "I see.“

He reopens his eyes to see Naruto stare at his crotch now, rather unashamedly. 

Naruto clicks his tongue, biting his lower lip. "Maybe you’re right and that won’t be a problem… eventually.“

 

Kakashi stares at him, wanting to taste so badly he… 

 

Naruto‘s voice is a whisper, shivering along an almost black gaze. "Keep that thought. Sensei.“

 

 

And he’s gone, and Kakashi stares, and then closes the door behind him with a breathless chuckle, sinking down to the floor behind it, and then cupping himself, heaving breaths pulling in air of him, mixing irresistibly with the remnants of him, on his tongue. 

 

 

And Kakashi lets the desire come, aware. 

With relief. 

 

 

 

And the orgasm is fast… and excruciating. 

 

And it tastes, like summer.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

"Genma, what can I do for you?“

"Kakashi, I…“ Genma hesitates, looking away, with a grimace. "I was wondering if I could talk to you?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, and then grunts, noncommittally, while stepping back. “Sure?” 

 

He’s really glad he’s aired out the little space. 

 

Genma nods and then comes in, hesitating next to the futon mat. “It’s really not much, huh?”

Kakashi shrugs, lightly, keeping his tone deliberately unbothered. “It’ll get better. We’re back after all, and our losses are few.”

Genma nods, and Kakashi watches him for a moment, before sitting down against one wall, watching Genma do the same after a moment. 

He hums. “What brought this up?”

Genma grimaces again, and then fidgets, looking out the window. “Kakashi… I wish to… “ There is a pause and then Genma seems to come to a resolution, his voice a lot firmer than before. “Kakashi I need to know if it is really him.” Genma’s throat clicks as he swallows. “I mean Minato. If it can be really him? If he…” He trails off, his gaze unseeing on the floor now.

Kakashi narrows his eyes, a million questions on his tongue, but he only says, carefully: “Well, Kushina seems to think so?”

Genma raises his eyes to him, the gaze dark. “What do you think?”

Kakashi pauses, watching Genma for a long moment, and then rerunning all the little instances with Minato through his mind. “I… He’s as level headed and kind as I remember him. Calm, and collected, almost to a fault. Though there is humor to him, and layers of… slyness and mischief, I guess, that I didn’t notice back then, but then again I was very much a child for most of my time with him and quite stupid.” He feels the same.

Genma snorts, fidgeting.

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “What has brought this on?” He clicks his tongue. “I mean, we all saw the founding fathers, right? And the other resurrected? Why do you doubt it is him?”

Genma draws a hand down his face, and then his expression crumbles, for an instance, before he pulls himself together, obviously with quite an effort. “It’s just that…” He raises his eyes to Kakashi’s, obviously with quite the effort. “I feel so guilty. Have felt so guilty for so long? I was his bodyguard, then. I should have…”

 

Ah.

 

And you are afraid that if it is truly him, then he would be furious?

 

 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, and then exhales, softly. “Genma, just go to him. Don’t be afraid of him. Or his judgement. He is just…” A man. He trails off, and shakes his head. “They are just happy to be here. I’m betting anything he’ll love to meet you again.”

Genma ducks his head, and then nods, once. “Alright.”

Kakashi watches him for a moment, watches the pinched expression.

His voice sounds faraway. “We have been granted healing, Genma. Not just them, but it is for us, also.”

Genma raises his eyebrows, and then clears his throat, with a nod. “Thank you, Kakashi.”

Kakashi hums, and then smirks. “How about that, if you don’t manage by the end of the week, I’ll go and drag you to them by the scruff of your neck?”

Genma snorts, though shooting him a thankful look. “Think you could do that, old man?”

Kakashi grins, waggling his eyebrows. “Worth a try?”

 

Genma snorts again, and then nods, getting up again. He turns to the door, hesitating when he reaches it, his voice filled with humor when he looks back. “When they put you into the Hokage mansion you’ll be forlorn, won’t you.”

Kakashi chuckles, and then shakes his head, getting up, too. “I intend to mostly stay at the tower anyways. I could probably put a futon mat there somewhere.”

Genma hums, pulling out a toothpick and putting it into the corner of his mouth, with a wink. “You should go for a room. Maybe one of the offices. I bet Naruto wants to visit at some point.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, looking away for a moment. “Yeah well, plenty of time to have that sorted out still.”

Genma reaches for the door, his expression sly. “Not as much time as before though…”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, and then sighs, playfully pushing Genma out the door. “Nope.”

 

Genma grins and then nods, once, with a thankful gaze, and is gone, and Kakashi closes the door again with a sigh, leaning and hitting his head against it a few times before he chuckles, deeply.

 

 

 

No. Not that much time… at all.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“I’ll have Shikamaru draw up plans for them. Sakura is a Jonin already, she can assist with the tasks if necessary. And Team 7 can only test themselves practically anyway.”

 

Kakashi nods, hands in his pockets. “Right. And I want them to teach at the academy. Get their own genin team, later. But have them get used a bit to leading children first, they’re almost children still themselves.”

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow, tone amused. “Mh hmm, I noticed that they’re all legally adult now, though. Or will be, soon.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, looking away. While clearing his throat. “Yeah. Still.”

Tsunade looks away, pushing absentmindedly at a stack of papers. “But you will only be gone for a short while, Kakashi?”

Kakashi shrugs, looking out the window. He clicks his tongue. “Last time my visit with Sora led to a lot of revelations, and life changes.” He hesitates, lifting his eyebrows. “This time, I’m visiting her with some of those revelations and life changes.”

Tsunade frowns. “With some of those?”

Kakashi chuckles, a bit darkly. “Yeah, well, Iruka has informed me that he has taken his vacation now, too, and is coming with. And that Obito is, too.”

Tsunade’s eyebrows climb up her head. “Oh?”

Kakashi nods, the motion somehow dripping sarcasm. “Yeah. I didn’t really have a say in it.”

Tsunade’s mouth twitches. “I see.” She clears her throat. “So, I guess, I better change that seal formula.”

Kakashi snorts. “Yeah, that would be good I guess.” He hesitates, and then adds, with a sigh. “You do know that he could disappear if he wanted to, right?”

Tsunade sighs, deeply. “I know.” She looks up at him, tone deadpan. “You said he wouldn’t though.”

Kakashi nods. “Right.” He blinks. “He won’t.” He hesitates, repeating Obito’s words. “Everything he wants is here now.”

Tsunade hums, watching him intently. “Everything you want is here, now, too.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away. “Yeah, well, I’ll…” Survive.

Tsunade’s hazel eyes gentle, catching his gaze when he finally looks back. “You are only supposed to be gone for four weeks, Kakashi. They will still be here when you get back.” She leans back, spreading her arms, tone filled with laughter. “And then I’ll drag you from one official event to the next, wohooo.”

Kakashi grimaces, crossing his arms. “How long will it take for everything to be set up, after?”

Tsunade shrugs, sobering a bit again. “A few months is my guess. If need be, you will probably be sent onto a few missions still, but it’s currently rather quiet. Though I do not doubt that some people will try to use that lull in excitement.”

Kakashi nods, with a sigh. “Yes. And though there were only a few casualties, there were some. And some people will loathe us for ending the dream, too.”

Tsunade nods. “It’s been better since your speech. I know the other kages have given similar ones. But the people outside the main villages have a hard time right now, that I know.”

Kakashi sniffs, nodding.

 

Tsunade clicks her tongue. “Anko is slowly getting better. Though I doubt that she will be coming back to active duty.”

Kakashi grimaces, shaking his head. “That bad?”

Tsunade sighs. “Without wanting to go into detail now, lets just say Kabuto knew what he was doing.” She hesitates. “This will be hard for her.”

Kakashi nods, pulling out his right hand to rub at his temple. “Indeed.” He sighs. “Is she awake? Can I visit her?”

Tsunade shakes her head. “She’s stable. But I’m keeping her asleep for the most time right now. Come by after your vacation.”

Kakashi swallows. “Alright.” 

 

He hesitates. “Anything else?”

Tsunade makes a show of thinking and then grins. “Have fun, Hatake Kakashi.”

Kakashi grunts, and then turns on his heel, throwing the words back over his shoulder. “With Iruka, Obito and Sora?”

Tsunade snickers, her tone filled with delight. “Some delicious soul-searching coming right up!”

Kakashi looks back, narrowing his eyes in a mock-glare. “Ha ha.”

Tsunade laughs at him, openly now. “Just enjoy it.”

Kakashi sighs, and then hesitates, on the threshold. Meaning it, too. “I will.”

 

He sends her a look, and walks out the tower, turning his face towards the sun.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

He finds Tenzou on the playground once more, playing with Aiko.

 

He watches, for a few minutes, before he steps up, making very sure to keep his stance as relaxed as possible to not alarm them.

There’s only a few other kids right now, and the parents are settled in groups around the playground, while the children are running around, screaming and laughing and yelling.

 

Kakashi smirks, softly, and then settles next to Tenzou, on the ground. 

Tenzou shoots him a look. “Senpai?”

Kakashi hums, reaching out to ruffle Aiko’s hairs for a moment, who is playing with a small ball. “Wanna talk about it?”

Tenzou grunts. “Not really.”

Kakashi nods, but tilts his head, pressing on. “So, just a report?”

Tenzou, sighs through his nose, and then nods, once, lowering his voice. “Kabuto kidnapped me from that island, I believe you know that already. He stuck me in that cave, Anko was there already, bound. He… attached me to the white Zetsus, to infuse them with more of my… Hashirama’s cells.”

Kakashi frowns, noting the pause, but stays silent, just listening.

Tenzou clicks his tongue, after a moment. “The Zetsus enveloped me. They… I don’t know how to put it. They directed me.”

Kakashi pulls a face, waiting.

Tenzou exhales, through his nose, and then pulls a face. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m glad Orochimaru pulled me out of that thing.” He snorts. “I was so relieved I didn’t even think to punch him.”

Kakashi blinks, looking at him.

Tenzou rolls his eyes. “Yeah, well, old fantasy.”

Kakashi ducks his head, with a small grin. “I understand.”

Tenzou sniffs, and nods, rolling the ball back to Aiko, who kicks it back at him. He looks at Kakashi, tone vaguely amused. “It’s weird seeing you with both eyes.”

Kakashi snorts. “Yeah, it is weird to have depth of vision.”

Tenzou grins. “Are they sharingan?”

Kakashi grunts. “Supposedly?”

Tenzou blinks, and then quirks an eyebrow. “You have to reawaken them?”

Kakashi shrugs, once, and then sighs. “Apparently…” He shoots Tenzou a look. “Good thing I’m going to Sora for a few weeks then.”

Tenzou hums. “Indeed.” He exhales, snorting when Aiko throws the ball up, and it falls onto her head, making her giggle. 

Kakashi frowns. “What are your plans now? I mean, Team 7 is all grown now, and…”

Tenzou shoots him a look. “I am not sure. I would prefer not to go back to the Anbu, because of the shifts and rotations, but you know that.” He hesitates, and then grimaces. “Though I do miss it.”

Kakashi hums, and then tilts his head. “You could become my bodyguard? When they actually push the hat at me, I mean?” He turns his head to Tenzou, when his head comes round. “I mean it would still be shifts, and probably still danger, but we can minimize those with your substitute?”

Tenzou hesitates, and then sniffs, looking away for a moment, before nodding. He clears his throat. “I’d love that.”

Kakashi smirks, softly. “Good.”

Tenzou shoots him a look from the corner of his eyes, tone carrying a hint of slyness. “Feeling better now?”

 

And Kakashi sighs, deeply, heartfelt. “Oh god, yes.”

Tenzou cackles. He exhales, and then shrugs, lightly. “Guess I’ll build the foundations of my upcoming service then. Interviews, rotations… party planning.”

Kakashi grunts, with a grimace. “Now I am afraid.”

Tenzou grins. “As you should be, Senpai.”

Kakashi chuckles, under his breath. He hesitates, and then just asks, keeping his tone low. “So. Do you want Tsunade to officiate? Or me?”

Tenzou ducks his head, fidgeting, and then smiles at him, for a moment. “You, probably.”

Kakashi nods, clicking his tongue. Making a show of his sigh. “Guess I’ll have to work on that speech then.”

Tenzou blushes, just slightly. “Yeah.”

They are silent for a moment, and Kakashi hums eventually, pushing up again. “I would love it if Yugao would teach at the academy, too… do you know if she is interested in that?”

Tenzou looks up at him. “Maybe? I do not really know.”

Kakashi nods. “Alright. I’ll ask her when I get back.” He hesitates, and then bends down to hug Aiko for a long moment, before grinning at Tenzou. “You have fun, you two. See you in a while!”

Aiko blinks up at him, and then waves, with a broad grin, her high, clear voice ringing out. “Bye!!”

 

Kakashi grins at her, and there is a sudden stab to his heart, and he swallows, heavily, turning away to hide his shiver, unable to interpret this feeling. 

 

There’s just longing suddenly. 

Terrible, specific longing.

 

 

 

Huh.

 

 

He swallows, and then sniffs, hearing Aiko laugh, delightedly.

 

He tilts his head, looks at the general direction he knows Naruto is at, and then blinks, resisting the impulse to cover his suddenly burning tattoo with his hand. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“You’re really leaving?”

 

Kakashi shrugs, trying to ignore how his heart hammers at the tone in Naruto’s voice, while kneeling to finish packing his backpack. “Only a short vacation, Naruto.” He looks up, trying to catch Naruto’s sullen gaze. “I’ll be back before you know it.” He grunts when he pushes up. “In fact, you should enjoy it.” He shoulders his backpack, and then grins at Naruto, poking him in the chest. “I’m going to put you through the paces when I’m back. Physically and mentally.”

Naruto grunts, crossing his arms. Pouting. “Still.” He narrows his eyes. “And you’re taking Sensei Iruka and… Obito with. That’s no fair.”

Kakashi blinks, and then shrugs, keeping his tone light, while trying to ignore the pause. And the meaning of it. “I didn’t really have a say in that. You know how Sensei Iruka can be?”

Naruto snorts, looking away for a moment. “But, Sen… Kakashi, you’ll be away, now, I mean, now, that we’ve…” He trails off, biting his lower lip.

Kakashi swallows, the use of his name sending a shiver down his spine. And then he steps forward, slowly, sinking into Naruto’s embrace. He lets himself feel, for a long moment, feels the reality of the body in his arms, the lithe and yet powerful form, the way the arms tighten in his lower back, underneath the backpack. 

The way Naruto pushes his face into Kakashi’s neck. 

The way Kakashi can smell the sun on Naruto’s skin. 

The way the whiskers tickle.

 

Kakashi whispers, into gold. “It’s alright. Use the time without me to rebuild your foundations with your parents, and your friends. Without the distraction of me, or Obito.”

Naruto sniffs, his arms tightening for a moment. “I’m gonna miss you.” He pokes Kakashi into the side. “Don’t do anything I won’t do?“

Kakashi snorts and then hums, and then presses a clothed kiss to Naruto’s temple. “That’s giving me plenty of permission though?“ He can feel Naruto roll his eyes.  Kakashi swallows. ”I’m going to miss you, too.”

 

And then he steps back, thoroughly enjoying the way Naruto’s hands glide before they drop away. 

Naruto’s eyes find his, for a long moment.

And then he leans in, to kiss Kakashi’s clothed mouth. Whispering against it, before stepping back. “Come back soon.”

Kakashi shivers, unable to speak, watching him go, and then snorts, shaking his head.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

He bends down to press his palm to the earth as soon as they’ve stepped out of Konoha. “Kuchiyose no Jutsu!”

 

A puff of smoke, and then his whole pack is there, tails wagging. 

Kakashi grins at them. “It’s been… not that long actually?”

Pakkun harrumphs, sitting on Bull’s head once more. “We heard you were busy?” The little dog tilts his head. “Should we get ingredients from Yugao once more?”

“Ahhh… no.” Kakashi swallows, feeling the interested looks of Iruka and Obito, who are standing behind him. He clicks his tongue. “I’m going to Sora for a few weeks. Wanna come along and greet old friends? I mean you’ve been by last time a few times as well?”

There is a loud thumping as several tails start to wag, enthusiastically. 

Shiba jumps in, tongue hanging out. “Oh I’d love that.” He blinks, sharing a look with the others, before nodding at Iruka. “Iruka-san. So good to see you again as well.”

Iruka grins, reaching out to scratch his head. “Indeed. And without the need of keeping Kakashi safe and warm this time.”

Kakashi blinks, trying to ignore the vaguely amused look Obito sends him. “Right.”

 

He hesitates, and then looks back, over his shoulder, through the open gate, towards Naruto.

Iruka steps up next to him. “Are you going to be alright?”

Kakashi exhales, and then turns back to the road.

 

And nods.

 

With a smile. 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

I’m away for a few weeks, and I won’t have my laptop with me, so the next post will go up on August 13th. Sorry :/ It just won't post properly from mobile (all the formatting will be shot, tried that before)
(Also, I just realized it fits with the vacation Kakashi takes, lmao - given that this chapter has been written for a while it made me snicker^^)
I might still answer comments here, or asks on tumblr. Otherwise I WILL stay off the internet for self-preservative reasons. The last years have been a shit-show and it’s not gotten any better.

Please, you, too, take care of yourself. See you all on the 13th. 💕

(Oh, and I “ended” with a treat, right :)), I will “start” again with a treat as well, promise, 💕💕💕💕 And the “vacation” is only one chapter, but it needed to happen.:)))

Chapter 46: A bed of flowers

Notes:

Hey guys!! Missed you! 💕 So, ready to get back to it? :) *Hugs*

I know it wasn’t directly part of the chapter back then, but I figure Kakashi must have talked about Iruka to Sora, too, in those (almost) two years.

And, afaik we didn’t get to see Iruka’s dream.

Also, chapter “warning”: a little treat of Iruka/Obito/Kakashi
I didn’t put a marker around it bc it’s more or less (explicit) "talking“. It just clicked naturally for me. 😅

And, just as a comment: I’m fully aware that alcohol is no “solution”, but I also went through the experience of a cleansing rush and hangover a few times, and as with all things, if you take it in moderation, it >can< help^^.
In certain situations. *coughs*

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

Hachō-mura still looks very peaceful, and Kakashi lets his gaze drift over the houses and streets, remembering.

 

Obito rolls his shoulders next to him, while reaching out to Akino to scratch his head. 

Kakashi shoots him a look. “Ever been here?”

Obito shakes his head. “No. I mostly jumped from place to place in Amegakure and around. Sunagakure, too, since the Akatsuki had set up their hideouts in that area, as you know.” He tilts his head, quirking an eyebrow. “You know we could have gone through the dimension.”

Kakashi hums. “I know.”

Iruka grunts, reaching up to wipe sweaty hair out of his forehead. “So, why didn’t we?”

Kakashi shoots him an amused look. “Regretting tagging along?”

Iruka grunts. “So far, we’ve been running more or less for two days. I do hope the vacation itself will be a bit more relaxed.”

Kakashi smirks, turning back to the village, and then finding her house with his eyes, easily. 

He clicks his tongue, tone dry. “Physically, yes.”

 

He starts forward again, to Obito’s definitely worried: “Physically?”

 

Kakashi grins.

 

Just the tiniest bit meanly.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“Kakashi!”

Kakashi chuckles, reaching out to hug her to himself, immediately. “Sora-san.”

She squeezes him tightly, and then lightly pats his back, and he lets her go again, with a smirk.

Her hazel eyes find his, for a long moment. 

 

And then he turns around, to extend his hand towards the two men behind him. “Sora-san, this is Umino Iruka, and Uchiha Obito, who you have heard of from me before. By fate’s unparalleled…”, he hesitates, clicking his tongue, “wisdom they are bonded.”

Sora’s eyes crinkle. “Iruka-san. You are as lovely as he described you to be.”

Iruka colors, deeply, stammering a bit. “I… ahhh… he described me?” He swallows, and then bows, just a bit. “Sora-san. So nice to meet you.”

Sora smirks, and then turns to Obito, who fidgets under her gaze. Kakashi can see Sora’s smile get strained, just the tiniest bit. “And you, Uchiha Obito. You I had definitely not expected to see on my threshold.”

Obito grimaces, and then nods, with a shrug. “I didn’t expect to be here either.”

Sora hesitates and nods, and then clicks her tongue, stepping back. “Please. A messenger bird has informed me of your visit, so I have prepared your rooms.” She looks up at Kakashi. “You will have your old one.” She looks over at Obito, and then at Iruka, her gaze staying on him. “Do you wish one room? Or two?”

Iruka blushes, furiously, and then shares a long look with Obito, who is gazing back more or less solemnly, obviously deferring. “Err… one.”

Kakashi tries very hard not to react, keeping his gaze firmly on the surrounding foliage. While resisting the tug of the grin on his lips. Oh I see? And it’s not even painful anymore… we’ve come so far. He blinks, and then turns his head, catching Iruka’s gaze after all. Iruka ducks his head, just a bit. 

Sora hums. “Very well then. Go and freshen up. We can talk after dinner.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“I feel like I know some of your pain through Kakashi’s.”

 

Obito freezes, cup of tea in hand, and then relaxes again, with a visible, obviously deliberate effort. His tone is dry, underlaid with fatalism. “I believe that may be the case.”

Sora tilts her head, eyes sharp on Obito’s features. Next to Kakashi, Iruka tries not to breathe. “How is that for you? To know what you did and to know the pain you caused.”

Obito laughs, breathlessly, caustically, looking away into the dark of the forest beyond the property’s limits. He sniffs. “You’re really not one to pull your punches…”

Sora quirks an eyebrow. “Neither are you? You spent most of your adult life preparing what would be more or less a genocide. Your actions have resulted in lots and lots of deaths. And you watched, while you sacrificed one piece after the other on the board. All those people who died in the attack. All those jinchurikis. Even the group you infiltrated to help you.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, feeling naked with his mask down in a sign of goodwill for dinner. 

Trying to school his features. 

Iruka next to him shivers.

Sora continues, relentlessly. “If I understand that correctly you even killed one of those only recently. A few weeks ago.” She hesitates, her tone light, though her words cut to the core. “And now you’re here.”

Obito sniffs, angrily wiping at a tear, while hissing. “Yeah, and isn’t this funny.”

Sora hums, watching him intently. “Fate is extraordinary at times… that is why you’re here, too.” Her eyes find Kakashi’s for a long moment. “It must be incomprehensible for you.” She clicks her tongue. “It is for me.”

Kakashi exhales, and then laughs, once, without any humor, knowing she means Minato and Kushina. “Wait till you meet them.”

Sora nods, and then raises her eyebrows. “First, we’re here though. The Godaime has asked me to help you come to terms with this situation.” She snorts. “Which is a fine request and all, but I can assure you that I would have dug around in this wound in any case.”

Iruka grunts. “Coming to terms with it will be nice though.”

Sora’s hazel eyes find Iruka’s warm brown ones. “It is you who has asked for one room though.”

Iruka grimaces, looking away, and Kakashi watches him, silently. Watching the muscles in the jaw jump.

Iruka sighs, and then looks back at her, something defiant in his gaze. “We cannot move forward if we stay apart and don’t resolve this?”

A smile tugs at Sora’s mouth. “Indeed.” Her eyes find Obito’s for a moment. “Physical closeness does strengthen the feeling of righteousness.” She clicks her tongue. “Have you kissed? Or more?”

“Ahhhhh….” Iruka sputters, coloring once more, while Obito looks away, with a weird expression on his face.

Sora hums. “I see.” She weighs her head. “That might be a good start?”

Obito sniffs.

Kakashi tries very hard not to grin, a part of him enjoying this torturing extremely.

 

That joy is sucked into the dead, cold void of space though, immediately, when Sora faces him, while still addressing Iruka. “Maybe you should invite Kakashi into your bed. If I understand it correctly, you both were his lovers. You could bond and explore while remembering?”

Kakashi stares at her, flabbergasted, mind a flatline.

Iruka does, too, and then reaches up to hide his flaming face behind his hands.

Obito swallows. 

Sora blinks, very innocently. “What? I mean, you’re all definitely old enough. And as far as I know Naruto has more or less given Kakashi blank permission?”

Kakashi gasps, in what could have been a laugh, his throat dry, viciously regretting right now that he told her of Naruto’s little comment earlier. “Ahhh…. I… I don’t know if that is what he meant?”

Sora scoffs. “Oh please. That boy has always been very astute in regards to attraction, sexual and otherwise. He developed that sexy jutsu on his own, remember. And, if what I read in the report is true, the reverse harem with him and his clones making out specifically to distract the enemy… that must have been something, right?”

Kakashi grunts, trying to sound neutral. Remembering the why Naruto developed it, too. Needing to deflect. “You read a report?”

Sora narrows her eyes, and grins. “Tsunade wanted my thoughts on Sakura’s absorption of the black Zetsu. She sent me her report.” Her eyes find Obito. “You were there, too. Do you think Naruto doesn’t know what he’s doing?”

There is a pause, and then Obito snorts, with a shake of his head. “Probably more to the contrary.”

Sora extends her hand, with a waggle of her eyebrow and a meaningful look thrown Kakashi’s way, silently.

Kakashi rubs his face. “Still. The bond has engaged, and I…” 

Sora’s tone is firm, gentle but also cutting. “The bond has engaged and he is still with Sasuke. While sending you onto vacation with two of your ex-lovers, and telling you not to do anything he wouldn’t do. Which, in turn, gives you permission to actually do what he does.” She pauses, and then leans forward a bit, hazel eyes mischievous, while Kakashi just tries to breathe. “So tell me. What are you allowed to do?”

 

Iruka grunts, pulling his hands from his face, and holding them up, tone exhausted. “Ok, alright, stop.” He lowers his voice. “Please.”

Sora quirks an eyebrow, her eyes turning to Iruka’s. “Don’t tell me you don’t want to.”

Iruka wheezes, and his face is behind his hands again, his words mumbled. “Heaven help, but you are something else.”

Obito snorts. “Indeed.”

There is a pause, and Kakashi swallows, trying to look at anything than them. And trying not to remember all those clones Naruto conjured, making out.

And trying not to imagine, thank you very much.

 

Obito snorts again, his voice dripping with amusement and sarcasm. “And now we’re all sitting here, trying sooooo hard not to imagine…”

Sora quirks an eyebrow, her expression sly. “I bet you know enough about privacy seals.”

Iruka groans. 

 

Kakashi starts to chuckle, helplessly, drily, while shaking his head. “Yeah, well, I missed you.”

Sora grins at him. “You better.” She pushes up with a sigh. “I am going to get you some sake. And then I’ll retire. Don’t do anything… Naruto wouldn’t do.”

Iruka wheezes, a sound that is definitely painful.

Obito starts to chuckle, too, under his breath.

Sora steps away, retrieving the bottle and three glasses, and putting it down next to them matter of factly. Her eyes find Obito’s. “So. Have you ever been drunk?”

Obito hesitates, and then shrugs. “No, I mean, that has never been…” He hesitates, a shadow passing over his face, before he continues. “…possible.”

Sora nods, and then she shoots a look at Kakashi, though her words are obviously still meant for Obito. “Alcohol lowers ones defenses. Take it in measure and it can facilitate healing, especially when complicated feelings are involved.” She hesitates, and then gestures at the bottle, with another look at Obito. “This will not be the most delicious drink for you to start with…” She weighs her head. “Just take it as medicine?”

Iruka snorts, mumbling something under his breath.

Sora smirks, and then leans in a bit, waiting until Iruka lowers his hands to look at her. “Umino Iruka, you are caught in this net fate has woven as well, and almost as deeply. My advice is to just enjoy the possibilities and safeties of it.”

Iruka snorts, tone dry, though there is something shivering through it that bleeds vulnerability. “Safeties?”

Sora tilts her head. “Do you wish to tell me Kakashi doesn’t love you?”

Iruka blinks, and Kakashi looks away for a moment, feeling flayed open.

Iruka’s voice is a whisper. “No. I mean, I know he does.”

Sora nods, echoing. “You know he does.” She reaches out, to put her hand on Iruka’s shoulder. “Trust what you know. And feel.”

Iruka swallows. 

 

Sora straightens up again. 

And turns away with a smirk. “Enjoy your evening.”

 

Kakashi grunts.

 

Iruka watches the sliding door close, his voice low. “Does she really think we just…” He trails off, gesticulating vaguely. 

Kakashi snorts and then shrugs, mutely. Definitely not thinking.

Obito sniffs, and then reaches for the bottle, pouring too much sake into their glasses, and ignoring Iruka quirking an eyebrow at him.

He holds up a glass, toasting. “Well. You heard her. Medicine.”

Kakashi blinks at him, and then shakes his head once. He clicks his tongue. “You really want to start with sake?”

Obito frowns. “What did you start with?”

“Ahhh…. “ Kakashi blinks, and then snorts. “Sake. With Jiraiya.”

Obito cackles. “Ooohhhhh?”

Kakashi points a finger. “NO!” He rolls his eyes. “Not like that.”

Iruka reaches up to rub his temples, looking and sounding exhausted. “I feel so done… and it’s only day one?”

Kakashi cackles, reaching for his glass. “Yeah, Sora tends to have this effect.”

Obito’s tone is caustic. “I shudder to think how we’ll feel when the vacation is over.”

Kakashi hums. “Either settled and relieved, or…” He trails off, quirking an eyebrow.

Iruka finishes for him, deadpan. “Or we’re dead because we strangled each other.”

Obito weighs his head. “Yep. There’s a fair chance for that.”

Kakashi grunts. “Mhh hmmm.” He picks up his glass, holding out to toast it to Obito, who raises his one as well. Kakashi grins. “Here’s to your first hangover.”

Obito blinks, and then stares dubiously into his glass, expression pinched. “Ah, yeah, right, maybe I shouldn’t after a…”

Iruka interjects, retrieving his glass with a shake of his head. “Forget it. On three.”

Kakashi grins, and then throws back the drink on Iruka’s ‘three’, seeing Iruka and Obito do the same.

 

Obito, who is coming back up sputtering and coughing and wheezing, face half red and disgusted. 

He whines. “Why?”

Kakashi cackles, reaching out to refill their glasses. “Just wait a moment.”

Obito pulls a face. “Will the taste get better?”

Iruka grins. “No. It’s an acquired taste though, you’ll start to like it.”

Obito grimaces. “I can not imagine. I…” He trails off, with a small shiver, and Kakashi hums, reaching out to push his glass towards him. 

“Here, another one. Just a tiny bit slower this time.”

Iruka chuckles, watching the flush on Obito’s face, with a click of his tongue. “Rushing through your veins?”

Obito shudders. “I… I don’t know what Kaguya did, but this feeling…” He sniffs, the dark eyes filling with tears. “The feeling is through my whole body. I mean, I…” He breaks off, lips trembling, and then raises his eyes to Iruka. “For so long I could not feel in so big a part of my body. And now…” 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, and then empties his glass, just a tiny bit more slowly, laughing when Iruka smacks his lips after downing his own. “You didn’t follow my drinks last time we drank…”

Iruka weighs his head. “Yeah, well, last time I wanted to know how afterlife was.” He points a finger. “And I wanted to remember it, after.”

Obito hums, eyes half closed, licking the remaining sake off his lips. “And you don’t want to remember this?”

Iruka frowns, and then shakes his head, once. “No, that’s not it.” He grins, reaching out to refill their glasses, his cheeks vaguely flushed, and looking absolutely lovely in Kakashi’s obviously biased opinion. “But remembering words, and remembering touch…” His voice drops to a whisper. “Are slightly different things.”

Kakashi blinks, looking down into his sake. His mouth is dry. “Are we… are we really doing this?”

Iruka looks up at him, eyes dark.

Obito blurts out, blushing furiously, the white of parts of his body in stark contrast. “I want to.”

Iruka closes his eyes, and then snorts, with a shrug, while raising his glass again. “See?”

Kakashi locks their gazes, tries to read the fathomless dark that gazes at him. “You said we shouldn’t cross that bridge again.”

Iruka grunts, and then snorts. “Yeah, well, that was before a lot of life-changing events happened?” He licks his lips. “And, I mean, we all know this would be here, and now, only, right?” He presses his lips together. “You’re hungering for your bond, and for the experience of it.” He swallows, his voice dropping to a whisper. “So do I.” Iruka blinks, obviously deliberately not looking at Obito. “I’ve been jealous, Kaka-kun. Of this thing that ripped us apart, of this promise that you were given. Oh, I knew and I know of the difficulties, and yet…” He breaks off, swallowing. “And now…”

Kakashi whispers. “This would be your first time.” He looks over at Obito, who gazes back, solemnly, another glass of sake in hand. 

Iruka shrugs, and then looks over at Obito, biting his lips. “Yeah, well. There’s always a first time. And we’re on vacation?”

 

Kakashi blinks at him, and then at Obito, who suddenly grins. Leaning in, with a whisper. “You could show me the places I should touch? And how to?”

Iruka colors, deeply, reaching for his glass and throwing it back. 

Kakashi stares at Obito, for a long moment. He raises his glass, the alcohol burning his throat when he sips it down, deliberately taking smaller amounts in a desperate attempt to get his dry mouth to cooperate. 

He shifts his gaze to Iruka. He knows the smile on his lips is not lewd, but gentle, despite his words. “There is this spot behind his ear, down the column of the throat, the sound he makes if you nibble there will go through your mark and bone.”

Iruka looks up at him, eyes black.

Kakashi bites his lips, and then shifts closer, kneeling in front of Iruka, feeling Obito come closer as well. “He shivers if you press your tongue to the corner of his eyes.” He lets his gaze travel, letting the warmth come, the desire. “He likes to have his nipples licked, lapped at, slowly, while exploring. Likes to have them bitten when you fuck him, hard, later.”

Iruka sighs, tremblingly. Kakashi can smell him now, a heady aroma that latches onto hindbrain and memories, mixing intoxicatingly. He smiles, broadly. “He is a genius at edging you. He would take me, for hours, slowing down and stopping whenever I got too close, until I begged.” Kakashi exhales, deeply, remembering. “The hand on your neck will keep you at the perfect angle, until there’s nothing else beside him.” 

He swallows, the sound loud in the silence, the other two listening breathlessly. “He likes to have his toes sucked. He’ll squirm and giggle, but he also will throw you down and take you, heavenly, when you do that.” Kakashi chuckles, reaching out to pull Iruka’s pony tail free, the brown hair falling down onto his shoulders like a wave. 

Kakashi blinks up at Iruka, slowly. “He likes rimming. He prefers it to a blow job.”

Iruka closes his eyes, shivering.

Kakashi can see the dent in his pants now, the way the hands fidget. He grins. “But if you only nibble at the head, pushing at the skin with your tongue and lips only he’ll happily come all over your face.”

 

There is a pause, the only sounds their heavy breathing. 

 

Obito breaks it, tone bothered, obviously addressing Iruka. “What about Kakashi?”

Iruka swallows. He looks away for a moment, and then back at Kakashi, defiantly. “Kakashi needs to be taken out of his head. He likes you to take control, fuck him through the mattress. The scars on his body are numb and yet extremely sensitive, and you will be able to make him writhe helplessly if you explore them.” 

Iruka grins suddenly, broadly, and then reaches up, threading his fingers through Kakashi’s hair. “He likes to have his hair pulled. One of the most beautiful things is to ride him, and see him break apart beneath you.” Iruka shivers, his eyes black on Kakashi’s. “And while he is right that I like rimming…” Iruka bites his lips. “Seeing those lips pleasuring you is definitely addictive.”

Kakashi swallows, feeling hot. 

He can see Iruka’s nostrils flare.

 

Iruka’s voice is bothered when he speaks again. “So. What about Obito?”

Kakashi leans in, whispering, while his eyes find Obito’s off to the side. “Obito loves blow jobs. He loves to guide you, clench your hair, and come deep, deep down in your throat. He was begging me, blissed out, to come on his chest after, over his heart.” Kakashi hesitates, seeing Obito sway, just a bit, expression bothered. “His left ear is extremely sensitive. And the white skin…” Kakashi smirks, and then bites his lips. “It tickles. Rubbing the spots on the normal and white skin simultaneously will render him dumb from pleasure.”

Iruka swallows, breath short. “What about his kiss?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, his gaze returning to Iruka‘s. He breathes the words. “Find out?”

 

Obito mewls, low in his throat.

Iruka turns his head, slowly.

 

Kakashi knows he should probably draw back a bit, but he is rooted to the spot, watching Obito shuffle close. Iruka reaches for him, with a shaking hand, threading his fingers through the short black hair at Obito’s nape. 

 

Obito leans in, pressing a shaky kiss to the vulnerable skin below Iruka’s left eye.

Iruka tilts his head up, with a sigh, and a tear, dropping from his eyes.

 

Time seems to slow, to eternities between heartbeats, as Iruka receives this kiss, this dry-mouthed, gentle, careful kiss, that still somehow marks. 

Kakashi can see it, his breath short, his body shaking. 

He can feel Naruto’s kiss suddenly, the kiss he got in the tent, not the one against the tree. The one that had been fueled by feeling, not lust. 

 

And he knows.

Knows what they’re feeling.

 

And he smiles, through a wobbly world.

 

 

 

And then, Iruka tilts his head. 

And, obviously, opens his mouth.

 

 

 

It’s a bit as if floodgates are opened, and in a way, it probably is, the moan that tears itself from Obito’s throat base and loud.

Kakashi hastily engages a privacy seal and reaches out to push the outer sliding doors shut, with a giggle, while Iruka is climbing onto Obito’s lap. He turns back to see the glasses topple over when Obito turns and presses Iruka to the floor, and he pushes those out of the way too, unable not to snort, and feel hot, and weird, and…

Iruka’s hand finds his head, his hair, and pulls him in.

Obito’s lips are wet when they break from Iruka’s, and find his.

Kakashi moans, tremblingly, hearing Iruka groan, and whisper something. Obito chuckles, into Kakashi’s mouth, while starting to suck, on his tongue.

Iruka’s fingers make short work of Kakashi’s fly. 

 

Kakashi groans, mind inflamed by lust, and a deep, deep need, and Obito topples him over, the kiss biting now, teeth clashing, and then Obito is gone again, and Kakashi reopens eyes he doesn’t remember closing to see Obito kissing Iruka again, wildly. 

Kakashi pushes up, draping himself over Iruka’s back, to find that spot, worrying it with his teeth until Iruka is writhing between them, flushed, and mewling. 

Kakashi reaches down, to rub his perineum, through his clothes, chuckling breathlessly when Iruka’s tone changes cadence. 

He licks a stripe up Iruka’s neck, groaning the words against the wet skin. "What is it you want? Both of you?“

There is a wet sound as Obito breaks the kiss, looks at him, wildly. Iruka is drawing shuddering breaths. 

Kakashi locks their gaze. Repeating. "What do you want.“

Iruka swallows. "I want this to be as good as we can make it.“

Kakashi snorts. 

Obito grins, leaning in to nibble the word around Iruka‘s mouth. "Meaning?“

Iruka chuckles into the open kiss. "Everyone gets their favorite?“

Kakashi shivers. 

Obito moans, low in his throat. 

Iruka continues, a timbre to his voice that sends shivers down Kakashi’s spine. "Kakashi will use his mouth on me. Make me come apart, and then lick me open. Make me wet, and then really wet with the lube I brought.“ Obito grunts, eyes squeezed shut, breathing heavily. 

Iruka chuckles. "You will feed me your cock. Make me take your essence.“

Fuck. 

Kakashi squeezes his eye shut, reaching down to press the base of his cock. Panting heavily now, too. 

He doesn’t recognize Obito’s voice. "And then?“

Iruka smiles, a smile that is a stark contrast to his words, pure and light. "And then, I‘ll ride him, slowly, gently, until he screams. And you will nibble at me, and then let me come on your face.“

Kakashi shivers, feeling light-headed. 

 

Iruka leans in, rubbing his face over Obito’s, lips ghosting over the wrinkles. "Undress me, and then undress yourself, and kneel over me. Let me taste you. I hunger for a taste.“ He turns his head to look at Kakashi, eyes huge and dark, so dark. "And you… put your mouth to good use.“ He grins, and lays back, raising his eyebrows. 

Expectantly. 

Kakashi exhales shudderingly, seeing Obito bend down to pull at Iruka’s clothing, almost feverishly. 

He breathes a chuckle, pulling the sachet of lube from Iruka’s pocket. "As you wish.“

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi cannot help himself, he starts laughing, loudly, when he sees Obito’s completely pale face the next morning. 

Obito sends him a skunk-eye. "You could have told me that finishing that sake would result in the headache from hell?“

Kakashi snickers, watching Obito flop down on the pillow rather gracelessly. "Everyone needs to experience that themselves, sorry.“ He grins. “And you really threw the rest of the bottle back after our… session, there was no way of stopping you anyways.“

Obito grunts, dubiously staring at breakfast with a vaguely green tinge to his pallor, before inhaling deeply, with a wince. "Where’s Sora?“

Kakashi smirks. “Out looking for mushrooms. She does a fantastic mushroom soup.“ He quirks an eyebrow. "Where’s Iruka?“

He watches in fascination as Obito blushes. “Getting dressed.“ He clears his throat, leaning in. "He asked me to… you know… when we woke up, and he was still so sleepy and… wet and…“ Obito shivers, eyes huge. "This is beyond anything I ever expected. I mean last night was…“ He gestures, silently, and Kakashi nods, feeling the tips of his ears burn, but he ignores it, last night still fresh in his memory after all. Really fresh. Obito continues, something dreamy in his voice. "But this morning…“ 

Kakashi clicks his tongue. "It’s different?“

Obito nods mutely. And then shrugs. "I cannot put it into words?“ His eyes find Kakashi’s. "He really is beautiful with his hair fanned out on the pillow.“

Kakashi grins, a pang of good-natured emotion he cannot really pin down in his chest. "Told ya.“ He smirks for a moment, and then leans in, whispering. “You should hear how he sounds when he is the one being edged…”

A grumpy voice interrupts him. “I bet he’ll find that out by himself, since you keep giving him ideas?”

Kakashi cackles, looking up at Iruka, who still looks like he didn’t sleep enough, the hair up in a pony tail once more but still somewhat… tousled. “Not… up for the idea yet?”

Iruka narrows his eyes, while lowering himself to sit next to Obito, his gaze clearly transmitting what he thinks of Kakashi’s wannabe funny comments. He blinks, slowly. “So this is what my life is now…”

Obito opens his mouth to respond, but Kakashi is faster. “Ohhh, the hardship.”

Obito snorts, and then winces, holding his head.

Iruka sends him an exasperated look. “Alright. Shut up you two. And let me have breakfast.”

Kakashi bows his head in mock acquiescence. “As you wish.”

Iruka rolls his eyes at him. And then leans over, to press a kiss to Obito’s lips.

Who is receiving it, like the blessing it is.

 

Kakashi shivers, a pang of envy in his gut, but there is a smile on his lips, too. We really have come so far already. So many certainties and old wounds broken up, and set anew to heal properly. Such an outlook for the future, too.

His mind flashes to Naruto for a moment, the tattoo pulsing. 

 

Sora’s voice presence interrupts his thoughts, her voice carefully gentle. “I see last night was very successful.”

Iruka blushes, breaking the kiss, and Kakashi speaks up, cheerfully. “Oh, it so was.”

Obito grunts. “If by successful you mean I feel like spit out with my head exploding…”

Sora grins, settling next to Kakashi with a small smile thrown his way, and the basket of mushrooms on the other side. “In a way that is very apt to feel in a new life, isn’t it? We come into this world, bloody and in pain, screaming. Your new start has been dampened by a rush of endorphins…” Her eyes find Iruka’s. “… and selfless forgiveness. Be thankful.”

Iruka quirks an eyebrow, and then reaching for some rice, while Obito reaches for his tea, clutching the cup. He fidgets, the wrinkled part of his face twitching. 

There’s a very solemn note to his voice. “I know I am. I… know.” He scoffs, lightly, looking down into his cup. “Though there are a lot that will not offer forgiveness.”

Kakashi frowns, watching him, trying to decipher the undertone. “What happened?”

Obito shrugs, softly, with a shake of his head. “Nothing, really. I was spit at.”

Kakashi grimaces, clicking his tongue. “And.”

Obito shrugs again. “Nothing, and.” He hesitates, and then sighs. “I was out for lunch, under guard. It kinda shocked me, but then again, not really, I mean…” He snorts. “I deserve so much worse.”

Sora hums, not mincing her words. “You do, and yet fate has chosen a different path. But that does not mean that this path won’t be difficult.” She hesitates, asking with a quirk of her eyebrow. “I take it the guards didn’t do anything?”

Obito grimaces, looking away, Kakashi absentmindedly noting the dark look on Iruka’s face. The look that’s a weird mix of anger, protectiveness, guilt and… understanding. He refocuses on Obito, with an effort. 

“No, I mean, I cannot blame them. They were very reluctant to lash out, because the woman…” He trails off. 

Kakashi prompts, after a moment. “The woman?”

Obito sighs, deeply. “The woman was crying. Apparently she was one of those that had lost someone.” He works his jaw, eyes averted. “I really cannot blame her.” He swallows, and then raises his eyes to Kakashi, with an effort. “I don’t want you to interfere. Or punish the guards. If I want to build a life I need to find a way on my own.” He swallows, turning his head to look at Iruka. “And I want to.”

Iruka gazes at him, solemnly. And then reaches up, left hand carefully cupping the wrinkled cheek. “Still. If you’re out with me, I’m there to find our way, too. And I will yell at them.” 

Obito’s throat clicks, his voice a whisper. “I deserve punishment.”

Iruka’s eyes crinkle, but his voice is grave. “I will decide on that. I will be that.”

Obito blinks.

 

Sora claps her hands. “Well. That’s settled then.”

Kakashi turns his head, looking at her with a frown.

She smirks at him. “Don’t look at me like that. No matter what he’s done or not, there is no-one better to make sure he’ll walk the path now that he’s bonded?”

Kakashi grunts, raising his eyebrow, and then sighs. “Still.” His eye find Obito’s. “Do remember what you promised Naruto. I was blind, not deaf, and I heard the promise you gave.”

Obito blinks, and then nods. “I will…”

Kakashi nods, and then grimaces, one thing that’s been bothering floating to the top of his consciousness, unstoppable. “I just have to ask though, Obito…” He hesitates, shaking his head once. “Why did you have to… kill Jiraiya?” He swallows, debating calling it ‘defeating’, but staying with the narrative for now. “I mean, you could have just isolated him in Amegakure? There was no need to…” He gesticulates, vaguely, and then sniffs.

Sora blinks, reaching for her own cup of tea, silently.

Obito hesitates, for a long time. When he finally speaks, he sounds exhausted. “That was Nagato’s wish. I think he desperately wanted to confirm his path… by killing Jiraiya, defeating him, he probably felt he could defeat what he stood for.” His voice drops to a whisper. “What he used to stand for. He wanted to confirm his path.”

Kakashi blinks. “Like you did, when you came to Naruto in that inn.”

Obito ducks his head, a small, sad smile on his lips. “You noticed.” He sniffs, looking up again. “Is that why you didn’t try to kill me there?”

Kakashi frowns, staring unseeing into space. “I don’t think I could kill you.” The frown deepens. “I know I should have at least tried, over and over again.” He snorts, watching the emotions play on Obito’s face. “But there is only so much I can endure.” And I cannot sever my ties to you.

Iruka speaks up, tone hard. “And it’s really enough pain by now.”

Kakashi tilts his head to look at him, with a small smile. Feeling terribly grateful. “I don’t deserve you.”

Iruka grins, though his eyes stay dark. “No, you don’t.” He tilts his head, and then sighs, dramatically. “Neither does he, but…” He spreads his arm, tone very fake. “But here we are.”

Kakashi snorts, watching Obito swallow.

 

He turns to Sora after a moment, waits until her eyes find his. “Did Tsunade tell you?”

Sora nods. “Yes.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, ignoring Iruka’s look. “What do you think of it?”

Sora weighs her head. “It’s an ambitious goal. If she is correct, it will take an immense amount of chakra to stabilize him. If she is able to find him. That is a big if, because the sea is deep there, and it has been a while.”

Kakashi hums, and nods. “Yes, though we now have someone in our debt who is able to transform into water, so… it might be feasible.”

Sora looks away for a moment, and then exhales, in a rush. “Another… piece we would get back.” Her eyes return to Kakashi’s. “Contrary to some pieces you’ve lost.”

Kakashi snorts. “Like my… like the sharingan?”

Sora’s eyes crinkle. “For example.” She clicks her tongue, reaching for a cup of tea. “How does that make you feel?”

Kakashi frowns, opening his mouth to respond, and then closing it again, after a moment. He shrugs, finally. “I’m not sure. I mean… “ His eyes find Obito’s for a long moment, and then he shrugs again, with a sigh. “I now have new eyes. Eyes that were made for me, even.” He snorts, trying to form the words, his tongue suddenly quite unresponsive. “The… the nightmares are gone.”

Sora watches him for a long moment, and then prompts, very softly. “But so is the ability to use your signature skill, chidori, isn’t it.”

Kakashi laughs, loudly, caustically. “Yeah, well, there’s always something, right…” He sniffs, refusing to let his hand shake, the sudden pain in his chest vaguely surprising even to himself. He presses the words out. “I don’t know why it hurts so much to have lost that. I don’t.” He hisses through clenched teeth. “I chose to give the sharingan back. I chose to sacrifice the memories and… dreams. I chose to…” He trails off, swallowing compulsively. 

Obito speaks up, voice a broken whisper. “The visual memories are not gone, Kakashi.” His throat clicks as he swallows. “I have them.”

Kakashi nods, mutely. 

 

Sora sips on her tea, before speaking up again. “A few years ago, a woman, a man, and a boy came to this village. They are living on the outskirts, keeping mostly to themselves, though the boy is a true sunshine, with lots of friends by now.” Sora clicks her tongue. “The woman possesses a skill that might help you adapt your chidori.”

Kakashi frowns, trying to read her gaze. “What do you mean?” He grimaces, with a shake of his head. “I wasn’t able to integrate other natures into my jutsus. Neither into the chidori, nor the rasengan.”

Sora nods. “I am aware. But her skill is truly unique. It might be worth a try.”

Kakashi draws a hand down his face, exhaling when he sees Iruka smile at him, softly. He shrugs. “Alright. And what skill is that?”

Sora weighs her head. “She is a crystal user.”

Out of the corner of his eye, he can see Obito twitch.

Kakashi blinks, nonplussed. “A… Guren is here?” And… that Gozu? And the boy is Yuukimaru?

Sora blinks. “You know her?”

Kakashi nods, slowly. “We had a run in, a few years back. She was used by Orochimaru as well, but in the end she chose the boy and life instead.” He snorts, softly. “So they really made it.” That’s good.

Sora nods. “If you could possibly learn to create the simplest form of her crystals you will be able to infuse your lightning with structure… and thereby direction.”

Kakashi blinks, and then stares at her, unseeing, something fluttering deep in his gut. “But… I mean, isn’t it a kekkei genkai?”

Iruka snorts, easily drawing Kakashi’s attentions. “Kaka-kun, if anybody can learn it, you can.” He raises his eyebrows. “Aren’t you the shinobi with a thousand jutsus….”

Kakashi blinks, mind still stuck on the idea. “Yeah, but a lot of those jutsus were picked up by the sharingan.”

Obito grunts, interjecting. “But the memory of them is in your brain. Only some of the visual records are in the eyes themselves. Besides, you do have sharingans once more… you just have to reawaken them.”

Kakashi grimaces, shooting Obito a skunk eye. “We both know what that means though.” He works his jaw for a moment. “I’m not sure if I’m willing to pay that price.” Ever again.

Sora hums. “There is no reason to believe that the sharingan can only be triggered by negative emotions though?”

Kakashi frowns, looking at her.

She smiles, continuing. “I would bet a lot on it that it can be triggered by intense positive ones, too.”

Obito’s voice is caustic, brittle. “There hasn’t been any evidence for that, though?”

Sora turns to look at him. “True. But then we have been at war and in fights, again, and again and again. The Uchiha are not the only ones to feel deep pain, though you were the ones with the eyes to show that pain. And the rage.”

Obito swallows, looking down at his bowl of half eaten rice. 

Iruka reaches up, hesitantly, and then starts to knead his neck, softly, with one hand. 

Kakashi watches Obito relax into the touch, slowly, after a moment.

 

Sora bumps into Kakashi’s shoulder, gently. “Why don’t we go for a walk, Kakashi.”

Kakashi smirks at her, just the tiniest bit forced, watching Obito lean into Iruka, vulnerability all over his face. “Good idea.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi raises his face to the sun, breathing in deeply, the smell of the trees and the grass and the earth and the water mixing intoxicatingly with the memories he has of this place.

Of the peace in his heart that was created here.

 

Sora chuckles. “You should get out and into the woods more often.”

Kakashi hums. “Usually I only get to leave the village if on a mission. And then…” He shrugs.

Sora nods. “And with the prospect of the hat looming when you get back…” 

Kakashi grimaces. “The smell of woods will probably be out of reach for a while, yes.”

Sora looks up at him, her hazel eyes golden in the light. “You could run for the hills?”

Kakashi snorts, and then shoots her a look. “Ha ha.” He inhales, and then shakes his head. “No. I cannot. And also…” He hesitates.

Sora smirks, and continues, finishing the sentence for him. “And also you don’t really want to, all things considered. Because you want to be the one who will build a world that Naruto can be Hokage in.”

Kakashi presses his lips together for a moment, glad for his mask, though he knows Sora can see right through it. He sighs, deliberately put on. “Astute as usual.”

Sora grins, and then sobers, slowly. Her tone is light, too light. “How are they?”

Kakashi swallows, hearing all that she isn’t asking. “Beautiful.” He reaches out, to pull Sora into a half-embrace, squeezing her softly before releasing her again. “It really is true.”

Sora gasps a laugh, her voice shaking a bit. “I’m trying not to feel.”

Kakashi nods, with a small snort. “I know.” He looks at her, quirking an eyebrow. “So I’m the one talking about your feelings now?”

Sora cackles. “So it seems?”

Kakashi nods, gravely. “I will try to do my very best.”

Sora grins. And then inhales, deeply. “So from what I understand they were… resurrected, and then somehow fully brought back to life… for a while?”

Kakashi nods, raising his eyebrows. “Yeah, so apparently Kaguya managed to reactivate their cells somehow. For a while. Between 5 and 7 years, by her estimation.” He swallows, his throat clicking. “They… look like back then. On that day.”

Sora exhales a shuddering breath. “Which is no surprise, given that the tissue samples were taken from their graves.”

Kakashi sniffs. “True. Still. The fact that they’re both…” Younger than me now. He shakes his head.

Sora chuckles. “They’re very close to Naruto now, in apparent age. That must be weird?”

Kakashi nods, and then shrugs. “Yes, but…” He frowns. “I don’t know, Naruto is apparently taking to them like a fish to the water. I mean, he met Minato in that chakra imprint, and apparently there was one from Kushina as well, and so he knew them in this form already, but…” He weighs his head. “It’s probably harder for the ones who did know them… before.” That night.

He exhales, through his nose. “Genma had a hard time dealing as well, feeling very guilty.”

Sora blinks. “Genma… he was one of Minato’s bodyguards, was he not?”

Kakashi nods, grimacing. “He never let it on, and I was stuck in my own pain… I didn’t notice he hurt so deeply as well.” I never noticed the pain of so many others.

Sora hums, reaching up to rub his arm, easily guessing his thoughts. “That doesn’t mean that you’re a bad person, Kakashi, it only means that you were, indeed, hurt very deeply.” She exhales, through her nose. “Pain puts blinders on us. Focuses our energies. That is why people so often choose revenge and lashing out when in pain. We are literally unable to see the bigger picture.”

 

Kakashi groans, reaching up to rub his hands over his face. His words are muffled. “How will I be able to see the big picture when I wear the hat? What if something happens and I won’t be?”

Sora hums, and then sighs. “You need those around you that will get in your face, and tell you the truth.”

Kakashi snorts, and then nods, dropping his hands. “I have heard that before.”

Sora grins at him. “And so that person should be part of your advisors, I think.”

Kakashi smirks. “I guess.” He frowns, looking down at her. “How long do you plan to stay?”

Sora rolls her eyes, tone deadpan. “Uh oh.”

Kakashi cackles. “No, but really, how long were you planning to stay with us in Konohagakure? I mean, you cannot tell me that you don’t want to spend time with them?”

Sora sighs, and then shrugs, turning onto the path that will lead them back along the lake. “I have been wondering that myself.” She grimaces, and then nods at the village a short ways off, and the waterfall. “I love my life here.” She closes her eyes for a long moment, before continuing. “But I left Konohagakure for reasons that have been, in part, invalidated.” She clicks her tongue. “The Sandaime is dead. The experiments halted. The past is gone.” She tilts her head. “And they are back. And there might even be a chance that…” She trails off. 

Kakashi looks at her. “You miss him.”

Sora smirks, softly. “Jiraiya and I often went onto joint missions. You know that. I was only a few years older, and he, I and Tsunade had lived together, as you also know. If there’s any chance…”

Kakashi nods, with a sniff. “I understand.”

Sora snorts, pulling a bit of a face. “I mean, it’s probably good they didn’t hook up back then, given the family ties, but now…” She shrugs. “Just living and loving for a while longer, until time comes for us… won’t hurt anybody.”

Kakashi swallows. “You’re not that old?”

Sora hums. “I’m not that young either. And Tsunade has used her full regeneration a few times, and during the war, too, if I understand that correctly. It is life-force based, so it will shorten her life-span. And Jiraiya… even if we manage to revive him, there is no guarantee for how long.” She shoots a look at Kakashi. “So, to get back to your question.” She shakes her head. “I’ll stay, with you, with them… for as long as I can. Helping, for as much as I can.”

 

Kakashi nods, slowly, and then swallows, raising his eyes to the blue sky once more. “Good.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“So, Iruka-san, what did you dream?”

 

Iruka’s head shoots up, almost comically, his eyes wide on hers. “Me?”

Sora smirks at him, reaching for her soup, the night sky beautiful and sparkling. “Yes. What did you dream?”

“Ahhh….” Iruka grimaces, looking away, his hair down for once, combed down, giving him a weirdly fae impression. Kakashi can see him swallow. “Nothing important.”

Sora hums. “All the dreams were important. They were what we saw as our perfect world after all, or, at least, a version of it.” 

 

She looks over at Kakashi, who shrugs, just softly. 

Obito turns his head, sitting a few feet away, leaned against the wall. Obviously fighting not to cling.

 

Iruka grimaces again. “Why is that important though?” He clears his throat. “I mean, here, now?”

Sora narrows her eyes, hesitating, before addressing him again. “You dreamt of a future with Kakashi.”

Kakashi blinks, looking away, the churning in his stomach heavy and sudden. 

Iruka laughs, a brittle little laugh. “Well, you really do see everything.” He exhales, shudderingly. “As I said, it’s not important.” His head comes up, to look at her, imploringly. “Especially now.”

Sora nods. “Yes, reality has invalidated this dream.” Her eyes find Obito’s eyes, for a moment, who is trying to look neutral, but Kakashi can see him twitch. “Thinking of it, do you think it would hold up? If reality would have been different, I mean?”

Iruka scoffs. “But reality is not different, I mean, I don’t see w…”

Sora interrupts, pulling her legs up and crossing her arms around them, while her hazel eyes are fixed on Iruka. “Humor me.”

Iruka turns away, raising his face to the ceiling for a moment. “I don’t th…”

Sora interrupts once more, her tone almost steely. “You dreamt Naruto died in the war and that Kakashi would acknowledge the bond broken, did you not? And that he came back to you?”

Kakashi shivers, watching Iruka grimace.

Iruka turns back, his voice raw. “No.”

Sora quirks an eyebrow. “No?”

Iruka grimaces again, and then hisses, the words heated. “I dreamt that Naruto died, yes, but Kakashi couldn’t stomach it, so I found a way to break the bonds. All of them, I mean.”

 

Silence.

 

 

Kakashi’s whisper is loud in the heavy void. “Your perfect world was a world where bonds didn’t exist?”

Iruka sniffs, angrily wiping at his eyes. His voice is still heated. “Yeah, well, watching you suffer, and all the shit that came from it wasn’t much fun, so…” He chuckles, a dark sound, reaching up to scratch through his own hair, pulling it a bit. His voice drops to a whisper. “It was a peaceful dream. Eventually.”

Sora nods, and then sniffs. “And now?”

Iruka sounds exhausted. “What now.”

Sora tilts her head. “Would it be your perfect dream now, too?”

Iruka drops his hands, some of the hair falling forward to hide his face, like a veil. “No.” He turns his head, towards Obito, just a bit. “Too much has happened already.” He swallows, his throat clicking. “There’s…” He trails off.

Kakashi blinks, finishing for him. “Anticipation.”

 

Obito’s dark eyes find his, for a long moment, before he scoots over, and envelops Iruka in a hug.

 

Sora’s voice is a whisper. “Good.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“Hello Guren.”

 

Guren’s black eyes snap up, wide and watchful.

Kakashi tries to keep his posture relaxed, lifting his hand to wave at her only, just a bit.

Guren straightens up from where she had tended to a small herb garden, her dark blue hair up in a spiky ponytail once more, a bit frizzy from the misty rain. “Hatake Kakashi. What brings you here, to this part of the world, and while masking your chakra?” She tilts her head, the eyes glittering. “Do I need to call for Gozu?”

Kakashi shakes his head, just a bit. “No. And I apologize for surprising you such, I wanted to not trigger you into fleeing.”

Guren quirks an eyebrow, while brushing off earth from her hands. “Trigger me… interesting choice of words?”

Kakashi grimaces. “I mean I am aware that we were on different sides last time we met… I hope that we can keep on neutral grounds this time.” He clears his throat. “Or even more.”

Guren blinks at him, and then lowers her head, just a fraction, her tone carrying something, echoing. “Or even more?”

Kakashi sighs, through his nose. And then he snorts, spreading his arms. “I’m sorry. I know I probably don’t make much sense right now.” He shrugs. “Can we talk?”

Guren stares at him, for a long moment, and then shrugs, with a snort. “Sure.” She turns, and walks up to the house, and Kakashi follows at respectful a distance, taking the deliberate show of her back as what it is - a warning. 

 

 

 

Guren points at the low table, the house an open layout, while moving to the side. “Do sit down then. I’ll make some tea. The weather is not as amicable as it has been the last week.”

Kakashi nods, latching onto the banter-gesture of goodwill. “Indeed. We really enjoyed our first few days here, in the sun. But of course nature needs the moisture.”

Guren hums, filling a kettle to boil the water. “Who are you visiting?”

Kakashi lowers himself onto a pillow, folding his legs beneath himself. “We are staying with Sora-san. I believe you know her?”

Guren nods. “We have spoken, once or twice. A formidable woman.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he snorts. “That she is.”

There’s a smile playing on Guren’s lips, for just a moment. “Who is ‘we’?”

Kakashi exhales, quirking an eyebrow. “Well, an old… friend of mine, Umino Iruka and…” an even older friend “Uchiha Obito.”

There’s a clink of porcelain, as Guren obviously puts down the cups too hard. Her black eyes are coals. “What.”

Kakashi blinks up to her. Ah. So you know him? He grimaces. “Yeah well, before you get worked up over that… they’re bonded. And trying to find their footing.” He snorts. “We all are.” He watches the muscles in her jaw jump. “How do you know Obito?”

She snorts, grimacing a bit, while reaching for the tea. “He tried to win me over after they had captured the three-tails… after our little incursion back then.” Her eyes find his, for a moment. “I told him to leave me alone, and he did… eventually.”

Kakashi pulls a face. “Eventually?”

Guren chuckles, a bit darkly. “He wasn’t particularly keen to hear a ‘no’. He pulled me into a cave with some kind of jutsu, and there were these white things… I encased them all in crystal, threatening to burst them.” She grins, a bit meanly. “Apparently, that was the right thing to use as leverage.” She lifts her eyebrows. “At least then.”

Kakashi hums, with a nod. “Good instinct. He needed them still, then.”

The kettle begins to whistle and Guren takes it, pouring the water onto the leaves. She carries the tablet over, putting it down unceremoniously, while settling next to Kakashi. “And he doesn’t need them now?”

Kakashi shrugs. “Oh, they’re gone. When…” He frowns, unwilling to rehash everything. He shrugs again. “They died, after the dream ended.”

Guren nods, slowly, while watching him. “I see.” She snorts, looking away for a moment. “That was quite the dream indeed.”

Kakashi nods, unwilling to comment.

Guren licks her lips, the smile wide, and sharp. “So how come he is alive? And here? Wasn’t he behind all this?”

Kakashi exhales, in a rush. “Well. That part is really complicated, and a resounding… yes and no.”

Guren snorts. “Should I have gotten the sake?”

Kakashi cackles, and then shakes his head. “No. Just…” He sighs. “It’s complicated.”

Guren nods, silent for a moment.

 

 

Kakashi watches her, breaking the silence once more, voice gentle. “Where is Yuukimaru?”

Guren lifts her eyebrows. “At school. He has found lots of new friends here.” A small smile flits over her face. “We’re quite happy.”

Kakashi nods. “That’s good.”

Guren taps her finger, once. “Why are you here, Hatake Kakashi. Not that I don’t appreciate the effort of extending niceties, but…”

Kakashi smirks, and then nods. “Of course.” He hesitates, for a moment, and then clicks his tongue, with a shrug. “I want you to teach me the basics of your jutsu.”

Guren stares at him, nonplussed. “What.”

Kakashi grimaces, a bit. “As you can see, I use both eyes now… I lost the sharingan.” Or the one I wore all this time at least. “I need to find a way to give my chidori direction once more. Sora said your style could be helpful.”

Guren closes her eyes, and then shakes her head, very slowly. “Why…” She trails off.

Kakashi smirks, understanding too well. “Why should you even begin to think about teaching me your signature jutsu?”

Guren nods, and then reaches to pour the tea, with a click of her tongue. “Yeah, that.”

 

Kakashi nods. And then sniffs. “I’m going to become Konoha’s Rokudaime Hokage in a few months. I…” He shakes his head, not knowing how to put it into words.

Guren’s eyes watch him, intently. “You want to offer me, or us, a pardon?” She blinks. “Congratulations by the way.”

Kakashi snorts. “No. Not just that, at least. But Yuukimaru is someone with exceptional talent. The Godaime has chosen the way of Healing, and I, and Naruto, wish to follow it. If Yuukimaru would want to attend the academy, we will not stop you.”

Guren’s eyes light up a bit. “Naruto! How is he?”

Kakashi smirks, reaching for his tea. “Good. There’ve been developments during the war, and they… have led to a lot of healing for him, too.”

Guren nods, with a bit of a frown. “Okay.” She reaches for her own cup, and stares down into it for a long moment. “I think Yuukimaru would love to see Naruto again.”

Kakashi nods. “I think Naruto would like that, too.”

Guren hums, leaning back a bit, to watch him. “Rebuilding Konoha is a mammoth task still.”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows. “Yes, and I…” He trails off.

Guren smirks. “You have plans?”

Kakashi shrugs, just a bit sheepishly, keeping his tone light. “Yeah, well, if they push the hat at me, they can just see what they’re getting, you know.”

Guren cackles. She takes a sip, her eyes searching his, before she hums, and takes a sip of her tea. “My crystal jutsu is a kekkei genkai.”

Kakashi knows. “I know. I know the ability itself is.” He hesitates. “But how do you form it? How did you direct this formidable dragon back then from something as inflexible as crystal?”

Guren quirks an eyebrow, her eyes still locked to his. There is a smile around her mouth. “Now that is the question, isn’t it.”

Kakashi tilts his head. “Yes.” He winks at her. “Are we negotiating?”

The corner of Guren’s eyes crinkle. “Always.”

 

Kakashi nods, smirking, and letting it transmit. “So. What do you want?”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Sora takes one look at him, and then chuckles. “I see it went well.”

 

Kakashi nods, sitting down next to her on the porch, staring out into the veil of mist raining down still. “Yes. We negotiated, and came to an agreement.”

Sora nods, and then quirks an eyebrow. “And?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Well, remember how we discussed that we didn’t have enough role-models?”

Sora frowns, but with a grin. “I hadn’t expected Guren to want to be a teacher?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No. She doesn’t want to be. Not per se. But…” He shrugs. “She wants access to the libraries and archives. She seems to work on some kind of lineage book.” He looks at Sora. “And she wants Yuukimaru to attend the academy. So, all in all, they asked for amnesty, which I granted, on the condition, that she takes on some training missions from time to time.” He hesitates. “I know how she is with children after all.”

Sora hums, with a smirk. Echoing. “Which you granted.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Yeah, well…” He shrugs. 

 

He exhales, and then shares a smirk with her, lifting his eyes up for a moment. “Iruka and Obito are upstairs?”

Sora nods. “Yes. I think they’ve been talking a lot.” She grins. “They might have compared notes, too, I heard them laughing.”

Kakashi grunts, but he cannot find it in himself to be annoyed. “Good.”

Sora nods again, but she keeps watching him. “You’re itching to get back.”

Kakashi ducks his head, and then reaches up to rub his face, chuckling. “Ah, well, yes.” He drops his hands, with a sniff. “I love it here, but…”

Sora grins. “But he’s there.”

Kakashi nods, and then shrugs. “Sorry.”

Sora smirks. “Don’t be.” She hums. “We should leave a bit early anyways, because there is no way in hell that I’m running the way back.”

Kakashi chuckles, and then sighs, shaking his head. “My pack won’t be too happy if we leave again soon.”

Sora snorts. “True. They’ve been in town all day.” She grins. “Apparently the mayor’s daughter truly took a liking to Pakkun.”

Kakashi looks at her, and then clicks his tongue, tone suffused with laughter. “Traitor.”

Sora chuckles.

Kakashi watches her, noting the tense shoulders, the hazel eyes vaguely absent. He whispers. “You don’t need to be afraid.”

Sora’s laughter dies, slowly, and then she sniffs. “I know.” She spreads her arms. “But I am, somehow.”

 

Kakashi hums, reaching for her hand and squeezing it, watching the misty rain fall with her.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“And you’re really good to carry Pakkun? He can walk, you know?” 

 

Kakashi sends a bit of a skunk-eye at the little dog, who looks mightily pleased, there, perched on top of Iruka’s backpack. “Or Bull can carry him, I mean…”

Iruka interjects, with a little sigh. “Yeah, but, Kaka-kun, who could possibly deny him?” He points up his back. “Look at the little guy?”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, looking up at the ‘little guy’, who is grinning down to him. 

Obito chimes in, voice suffused with amusement. “We could take the dimension shortcut?”

Sora sighs, holding up her hand. “While I would love to see it, someday, I would prefer it if we took the long route.” She hesitates. “And visited her.”

Obito blinks, and then looks at her, nodding after a moment, with a sniff. “Yeah, I mean…” His eyes find Kakashi’s for a moment. “We wanted to do that anyways.”

Sora nods, shouldering her own backpack, and then reaching to scratch Bull’s head, the rest of Kakashi’s pack milling around. “Good.”

Kakashi starts walking, slowly, turning to walk backwards after a moment, looking at the house while he moves away. 

Sora hums. “It’ll still be here for your honeymoon, you know?”

 

Kakashi snorts, and then turns round again, so not going there, but there’s a fluttering in his stomach also. “Yeah, we’ll see.”

 

 

We’ll see.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“There. It’s… over there.”

 

Obito’s voice is a whisper, almost inaudible over the soft burbling of the little stream. 

Kakashi sees Iruka reach for Obito’s hand, silently, standing next to him.

Sora’s hand is a soft pressure in Kakashi’s lower back. 

 

Kakashi sniffs, and then sets down his backpack, settling in the mossy grass next to it, his pack happily taking to the stream and playing in it.

He looks at the small patch of sunlit grass and leaves, right there, next to a small waterfall that sprays water droplets into the air, the rainbow colorations of broken light beautiful and fleeting.

He sniffs again, and then averts his gaze, looking at his right wrist. 

 

Feeling the beating heart around it, for a moment. 

 

Obito’s eyes are red, the Mangekyo staring at Kakashi, voice broken. “I can see it.”

His laugh is caustic. “From both perspectives.”

 

Kakashi nods, and then closes his eyes, deliberately drawing in the smells of the forest, and water, and the foliage. 

 

Obito’s voice reaches him, as if from far away. “In spring, she rests in a bed of flowers. The air is buzzing with insects and there are butterflies, everywhere.” 

Kakashi smiles, without opening his eyes. “I used the lilac stripes she wore for my Sukea camouflage… I can still see her laughing with Minato, back then.” His throat clicks, as he swallows. “That was before I got your eye…” He laughs, a brittle, painful laugh. “For years, decades almost, I was afraid I would lose all memories and feelings if I lost it.” His eyes open, slowly, find Obito’s red ones. “My only connection to the only ones I was able to love back then.”

Sora hums, stepping up to put a hand on his shoulder. “Not the only ones you were able to love.”

Kakashi grimaces and nods, his voice a whisper. “Right. Sorry, Iru-kun, I…”

Sora interjects, kindly but firmly. “Not just Iruka either.”

Kakashi blinks at her, and then he nods, after a moment. “If he had died during the war…” He trails off, jaw working.

Sora quirks an eyebrow. “But he didn’t, did he.”

Iruka interjects, gently. “I really would have loved to see the Green Beast in action.”

Obito snorts, and then shakes his head, tone tinged with awe. “He kicked Madara’s butt.”

Sora sighs, almost dreamily. “See, I would have loved to see that, too.”

Kakashi snorts, softly. “Old grudges?”

Sora shrugs. “Not really. Just…” Her face darkens, and she looks away. “Killing him broke Hashirama’s heart.” She hesitates, while Kakashi swallows, feeling for Hashirama, deeply. “I know he didn’t let it on, but I could see it. Mito-san saw it, too.” She quirks an eyebrow. “I think her lesson for Kushina not to… be jealous of these ties that bind outside bonds stems from this.”

Kakashi sniffs, and nods, though he looks at her, with a quirked eyebrow. “But I thought she knew beforehand? And… err… allowed it?”

Sora grins. “Well, I told you, everybody knew.” She sobers again, slowly. “But it is one thing to know, and another to embrace it.”

Kakashi blinks, and then looks up at Obito, and then they both snicker, helplessly, while Iruka frowns. 

Obito shakes his head, tone vaguely apologetic. “Just… Kushina-san really embraced Mito-san’s lesson, you know.”

Kakashi hums, remembering Kushina’s expression when she’d sent him home. “Oh yes.”

Obito grins at him, with a quirked eyebrow, and then sobers, slowly, closing his eyes to inhale, deeply. His voice shivers. “It feels better now.” He swallows, continuing after a moment, eyes unseeing on the stream. “To know that she’s here. To leave her to her rest here.” He snorts, lowering his gaze. “Once upon a time I dreamt of resurrecting her…”

Kakashi frowns, and then shakes his head. “Don’t do that though.”

Obito’s eyes find his. “No?”

Kakashi exhales, and then steps up to him, to stand next to him, looking down at the little patch of grass. “No. She’s passed on.” He smirks, bumping into Obito, gently, on purpose. “We’ll see her in a little while.”

Obito sniffs. “Yeah?”

Kakashi shrugs. “Well, eventually?” He smirks, and then a grin spreads, slowly, and he raises his eyes to the heavens. “We’ll probably get a whole welcoming committee? I mean…”

Sora speaks up, voice suffused with amusement, but also sparkling, somehow. “I’ll wait there with your Dad for you, Hatake Kakashi. I will enjoy the time to talk to him.”

Kakashi looks at her, and quirks an eyebrow, tone dry. “Not yet though, right.”

 

Sora chuckles, and then shakes her head. “No. Not yet.”

 

Kakashi smirks and nods, and then looks back at her, her, who is grinning at him now, both lilac stripes prominently highlighting her brown eyes. 

She, who hops around a bit on the flowers beyond the veil, and then laughs, twirling with her arms thrown into sunlit air, and Kakashi smirks back and inhales, deeply, hearing her voice, too. 

 

‘No. Not yet’. 

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

Also, I got a gift for chapter 39 the other day, illustrating the „eyes“ scene soooooo beautifully.
*sniffs*
If you want to take a look
💕💕😭💕💕

Chapter 47: Tears that fall

Notes:

if you’ve seen the last season of Naruto you know the black “suits” I refer to, Kakashi and Iruka wore them there… obviously I adapted them a bit for this occasion^^.
The first scene is a throwback to the art Anannua did for me for chapter 22, with Sora and Kushina.

Also: There’s a little bit of time still (not that much, a few chapters^^) till we get “there”, finally, but I just want to say that not everything always goes as you plan… and that your partner might not “jump” the way you want them to. (I know this doesn’t make much sense to you now, but…^^) I thought long and hard about why and HOW Naruto might push it, and how Kakashi would go about it. And react. :)

Chapter Text

 

 

He cannot really see much, the world too blurry.

 

But Kushina’s laugh rings out, loud, crystal clear and beautiful, when Sora asks her if she still thinks of Minato as a ‘wimp’. With a very shaky voice.

 

And Minato chuckles, around a sob, while he embraces Kakashi with one arm.

And then reaches for them, to draw them in, too.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

“So, how is being back with him moving in with you?”

 

Iruka snorts, rolling his wrist to shake his drink a bit, staring down into it, before raising his eyes to Kakashi’s. Shaping the word, in a very exaggerated way. “Weeeeiiiirrrrd.”

Kakashi snickers, taking a sip of his own drink. He nods at the barkeeper, signaling for another one, and then returns his gaze to Iruka, who is smirking into his drink now, a bit wryly.

Iruka hums, shooting Kakashi a look from the corner of his eyes. “Our little trip is the talk of the village…”

Kakashi nods, and then rolls his eyes. “Yeah, the rumor mill is working overtime.” He clicks his tongue, with a deliberate sigh. “Of course it doesn’t help that we supposedly glow…”

Iruka snickers. “And it doesn’t help that Sora is insinuating whenever she can to whoever she meets…”

Kakashi grunts. “Honestly. That woman will be the death of me.”

Iruka softly knocks their glasses together with a small clink. “Dito.”

 

Kakashi grins, and then sobers, nodding. He swallows. “I needed that.”

Iruka quirks an eyebrows, immediately sober and quiet, too. “The trip? Yeah, me too.”

They share a quick smile, and Kakashi hums, looking down in his glass. “It feels like it’s finished now, doesn’t it.” He inhales, deeply, and then smiles, softly. “We are… finished.”

Iruka swallows, and then nods, clearing his throat. “And isn’t it weird how it didn’t feel like this before?” He snorts, leaning back a bit, shaking his drink again. “But it feels right now, and I look forward, and…” Iruka pauses, his jaw working. “I can think  ‘I love you’ now and the regret is gone.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. “I’m glad.”

Iruka reaches up with his left hand and pulls Kakashi in, for a moment, pressing his forehead to Kakashi’s. He sniffs, and then draws back, and then smiles, broadly, while a tear falls. “So. I hear there’s a party coming up?”

Kakashi snorts, reaching up to wipe his own eyes, too, and then waggles his eyebrows. “Yeah, well, Tsunade thought we really have done enough mourning. And that we should celebrate being able to look forward.”

Iruka nods, and then grins, raising his glass to take a sip. “A propos forward, did you talk to Naruto yet?”

Kakashi shakes his head, reaching, for a moment. “No. He and Sasuke are on a mission hunting an arms dealer using exploding bodies somewhere…” He raises his left hand, points. “Over there.”

Iruka hums, watching him, gaze gentle. “You’re not worried?”

Kakashi taps his finger against his glass and then shakes his head, once. “No.”

Iruka frowns, just a bit, but with a smile. “Why?”

Kakashi blinks, and then shakes his head, with a snort. “No idea. But he’ll be back safely.” 

Iruka ducks his head, waggling his eyebrows. “Hatake Kakashi, trusting in fate?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, taking a sip before answering. “Shut up.”

Iruka snickers. 

 

Kakashi hums, shooting him a sideways look. “And you… having Obito wait for you?”

Iruka weighs his head, with a little smirk. “Well, he wanted to get a feel for our home, and put up some of the pictures you saved in that keepsake box, and I…”, he lifts his glass, expression sly, “I felt he should do so without me hovering over his shoulder.” He snorts. “If I got that correctly, we’ll be more or less joined at the hip from now on so any space will be hard to come by, right?”

Kakashi laughs out, loudly, snickering into his own glass. “Well, you said you would be his punishment.”

Iruka grins, and then clicks his tongue, eyes glowing. “Oh yes.”

Kakashi chuckles, and then sighs, letting his gaze wander, sobering, slowly. “I’m so glad that we managed to find a way through our muddled paths…”

Iruka hums, with a nod. “Yeah, Sora really is good dragging one through it by the ear.”

Kakashi smirks, and then nods, too, remembering that moment on the battle field with Kushina, vividly. “Oh yes.”

Iruka shoots him a look, eyes dark. “Think Naruto will be jealous?”

Kakashi blinks, taken aback, and then shrugs, mind… blank. “I have no idea?” He was jealous when Minato kissed me… and when Obito did. He blushes, just softly, taking another sip. 

A slow grin spreads over Iruka’s face, Iruka’s dark eyes watching Kakashi, intently. Leering, just a bit. “You want that.”

Kakashi feels the blush deepen, trying to sound nonchalant. “Yeah, well…” Maybe? A bit?

He shrugs. “I mean, it’s nice…” He trails off, clearing his throat.

Iruka finishes for him. “Being wanted.”

Kakashi tilts his head, citing. “It’s thunder, rolling in the distance.”

Iruka narrows his eyes, and then hums, eyes dark coals. “Thunder can be volatile.”

Kakashi shivers. And then he snorts. Tasting the words. “Well. I can take it.”

Iruka starts to chuckle, deeply, ending in a full-bellied laugh. “Oh my god, you’re going to make him work for it.”

Kakashi weighs his head, and then ducks it, feeling vaguely embarrassed. “Well…” I guess I… have earned that?

Iruka scrunches his nose, snickering now, and then toasts him, a wide smile spreading slowly. “Good.”

Kakashi blinks up to him, needing the support. “You think?”

 

And Iruka breathes the word, leaning close, eyes sparkling. “Yes.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Naruto, Sasuke and Hinata are on their way back.”

 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, shooting Tsunade a look.

Keeping his voice light. “I know.”

Tsunade grins. “Shivers in your gut?”

Kakashi weighs his head, feeling his gut churn. “Among other things?”

Tsunade smirks, a bit salaciously. “Want to be here for their report?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, shifting through the reports. “I’ll take forever to go through these otherwise?”

Tsunade chuckles, under her breath. “Alright.” She shoots him a look. “Ready for the party?”

Kakashi grunts, and then sighs, dramatically. “I will have to bring a toast, won’t I.”

Tsunade snorts. “Oh yes.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Greeeeaaat.”

Tsunade hums, and then looks down at her report, her voice suspiciously unsuspicious. “He went and got a haircut and a new uniform before he left, you know.”

Kakashi grunts, something fluttering in his gut. “Oh yeah?”

“Mhh hmmmm.” Tsunade leans back, her hazel eyes glittering with mischief. “I’m actually looking forward to your reaction.”

Kakashi blinks, and then looks up, a shiver running down his spine. His mouth feels dry. “Now I’m afraid?”

Tsunade grins. And then leans forward, clasping her hands. Waggling her eyebrows. “There’s been a growth spurt, too.”

Kakashi grunts, unable and unwilling to comment, heat pooling in his gut. Unwilling to examine the source of that, too.

Tsunade tilts her head. “I think he may be taller than you now.” She leans back a bit, with an exaggerated sigh. “Ah, the youth. How much can change in a few weeks….”

Kakashi narrows his eyes at her.

Tsunade grins. Broadly. Unashamedly.

Kakashi clears his throat, shifts to his other foot.

 

Tsunade winks at him, and then leans forward again, leaning on her left elbow. “So. I hear the Sora-Kushina-Minato reunion was quite something?”

Kakashi exhales through his nose, and then smirks, softly. “Oh yes. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Sora-san at this a loss for words… I mean after the initial quip…” They share a chuckle, and Kakashi shakes his head, slowly. “I mean I know how she feels. It’s such a shock to see them… like that.” He sobers, slowly, a shiver in his voice. “If they’d aged I think it would be better, but they haven’t, of course, they’re so young, they could be his siblings, and…” He trails off.

Tsunade watches him, tone very quiet when she speaks again. “Do those wounds heal?”

Kakashi exhales, and then nods, with a shrug. “Yes. I mean, they do for me, I…” He shrugs again. “They are the same, you know. And we all…” He grimaces, looking out the window for a long moment. “And we all know we’re on borrowed time. Even if that timeframe has been extended.”

Tsunade nods, her eyes narrowing a bit. “Naruto knows that, too.”

Kakashi hums, quirking an eyebrow, and shooting her a look. “You think that will influence anything?”

Tsunade clicks her tongue. “Most certainly, yes.” She shrugs, with a sigh. “I just don’t know in what way.” She tilts her head. “Are you prepared for that?”

Kakashi blinks, and then scoffs. “Am I prepared for my life to be turned upside down again?” He waggles his eyebrows. “More than getting the hat, you mean? More than the last 17 years of rollercoaster emotions? More than having them back?” There’s a smile on his lips, but his tone is caustic. “Honestly, it can only get better, right?”

Tsunade smirks, her eyes warm. “Yes.”

Kakashi silently spreads his arms.

 

Tsunade chuckles, and throws him a scroll, which he catches, with a frown. “What is it?”

Tsunade leans back, with a sigh. “An invitation. An air ship, the ‘Tobishachimaru’ will be revealed next month, on a plane close to Hozuki castle. It was supposed to be revealed later this week, but Mui’s death has left a bit of a void at Hozuki castle, and they weren’t able to properly set up security, since they’re providing guards there.”

Kakashi grimaces, the memory of the prison still very fresh in his mind. 

His tone is curt. “And, so?”

Tsunade grimaces. “Without Mui’s jutsu keeping control of these high-level prisoners has been difficult. They have asked for ninjas from our ranks to help, and for you, as the new Hokage, to name a successor while you’re there.”

Great. Kakashi pulls a face. “Options?”

Tsunade nods at the coffee table. “In the folder. Follow your gut though, would be my advice.”

Kakashi frowns shooting her a look. 

Tsunade shrugs. “We have to uphold the basic structure and power balance, you know that. So choose someone you’re comfortable with, because you will have dealings.” She snorts, drily. “Luckily, Mui was always kind of preoccupied, though we now know why though.”

Kakashi nods, and then sighs, staring at the scroll. “Can I take Guy with me? He’s going stir crazy in the hospital.”

Tsunade smirks. “Do that. And there will be a contingent of Konoha ninjas as well, helping the guards.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “I see.”

 

Tsunade nods, and then pulls another report from the pile on her desk, with a sigh. “You want to go and get dressed?”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “Dressed?”

Tsunade hesitates, and then blinks at him. “You don’t want to go to this party in uniform, do you.”

“Errr….” Kakashi grimaces. “Actually….” His head snaps up, breath short, a warm feeling spreading in his gut. His voice is scratchy. “Maybe later.”

Tsunade grins, nose scrunching, and then schools her features with a bit of a salacious grin, when the knock comes. “Come in.”

 

The door opens, and Sasuke walks in, followed by Hinata, and then Naruto, all three of them looking exhausted and just a bit dusty.

Kakashi leans against the wall, eyes unseeing on the folder he holds, and vaguely glad for the support, feeling Naruto’s presence, like a breath on his soul.

There’s a thrum to it, a tense aspect that stings, the taste of it heavy on his tongue.

Bitter and dark and seductive.

Kakashi swallows, trying to make sense of the impression.

 

He raises his eyes, slowly, letting his gaze travel up over Naruto’s form, noting the dark colors accentuating the golden skin. The muscles in Naruto’s throat shift as he turns his head, just a fraction, though his eyes stay on Tsunade. The golden hair is unruly still at this length, sticking up in places and Kakashi has a sudden urge to run his fingers through it, the vision of Naruto tilting his head back with a moan sudden, and almost uncomfortable in its clarity.

 

He hastily averts his gaze, just a bit, keeping his gaze unfocused on Naruto’s profile, his heart beating in his throat. 

 

Naruto speaks up, with a broad smile, that nonetheless betrays his fatigue. “Baa-chan, we successfully apprehended the arms-dealer. We have sent him to prison for interrogation for now.” He hesitates, tilting his head a bit towards Kakashi, though he keeps his eyes on Tsunade, tone teasing. “So, have we earned to party with the upcoming Hokage now? I mean, we made it in time?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, shooting Tsunade a look, who rolls her eyes.

“Yes, of course you can go now, you brat.” She chuckles softly. “You all have a week off”, she hesitates, holding up a finger, “after you have given me your written reports.”

From the corner of his eyes, Kakashi can see Sasuke sigh. Soundlessly. 

Hinata speaks, up, hands clasped behind her back, her black hair almost touching them. “Of course, Godaime. We will have it ready by tomorrow.”

Tsunade nods, shooting her a small smile. “Thank you, but in three days will suffice. I want you to enjoy yourselves tonight.” She hesitates. “How was it?”

Kakashi lifts his chin a bit, tilts his head just enough so he can see their profiles. He can see Naruto nod, the effort not to let his gaze travel and linger right now a lot.

“Successful, as I said. Not exactly easy, this arms dealer had previous relations with Orochimaru, and…” He trails off, grimacing with a sidelong look at Sasuke, who stays quiet. 

Naruto sighs, and then continues, eyebrows raised. “There was another piece of rather… ugly history revealed.”

Kakashi blinks, watching Sasuke‘s expression carefully, watching the little twitch that shivers over it. The way the purple eyes narrow, just minutely. His gaze shifts back to Naruto, to the short blond whips of hair, that hardly touch the hitai-ate anymore. To the way he matches Sasuke’s height now. To the way he looks so goddamn tall in that black shirt. Kakashi tears his gaze away again, with an effort.

Tsunade sighs, and then pinches the bridge of her nose. “I see. Well then, I look forward to your report.”

Hinata raises her chin, with a small smile. “Godaime, if I may?”

Tsunade nods, waving her hand at her. “Yes?”

Hinata exhales. “My sister Hanabi has mastered our clan’s jutsus.” A small smile flits over Hinata’s face. “I am extremely proud, of course, but I was wondering how the exchange program between the villages is coming along? I believe she and a few others would love to go and learn abroad.”

Tsunade inhales, deeply, and then shoots Kakashi a look, who tilts his head in inquiry as well.

“Well, since it has only been a couple of weeks a lot of the details are not settled yet.” She holds up her hand. “However, this is something that we can maybe discuss further with our guests at the party, too.”

Naruto pipes up, to Kakashi straightening up a bit. “Guests?”

Tsunade smirks at him, with a quirk of her eyebrow. “Both the Mizukage and the Kazekage have announced that they would like to participate and have arrived yesterday.” She clicks her tongue. “If I understood that correctly there were… people they and… their family members met during the war that they would like to meet again.”

Kakashi blinks, remembering vividly who Mei met. Oh?

Tsunade shoots him a look, and then shrugs, with a chuckle.

Naruto sighs, a happy little sigh, while rubbing his hands. “Oh, it will be so good to see Gaara again. I hardly got to see him during the war…”

The muscles in Sasuke’s jaw jump, and Kakashi stares, and then averts his gaze, with a small grin. Ohhhhh, jealous much, Sasuke? He shoots Sasuke a look from the corner of his eyes, unsurprised for some reason when their gazes catch. Sasuke’s is dark, fathomless deep somehow, an intensity to the purple rings that shivers between them. 

Kakashi averts his gaze, while clearing his throat, mind running amok. Now this is interesting. You came back from a trip with him right now, and Hinata, who should not be a threat to you… but you’re all riled up, and hiding it badly. What the hell happened there?

There is a pause, everyone somehow painfully aware of the shift in mood, and then Hinata nods, and almost does a curtsey, before turning and leaving, wordlessly. 

Tsunade clears her throat, lowering her head to hide her grin.

Naruto speaks up, before she can. “Baa-chan, I’ll go now, too, if I may.” He turns to Kakashi, just a bit, his blue eyes sharp on Kakashi’s, enhancing the thrum, somehow. “Sensei, meet me at Ichiraku’s for lunch?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, eyes shifting to the clock for a moment, noting the two hours till then. He clicks his tongue, keeping his tone deliberately light. “Sure?” His heart beats treacherously, once.

Naruto quirks a quick smile, there and gone again. “Thank you, Sensei.” He hesitates, turning towards the door, but addressing Sasuke. “Want t…”

Sasuke interjects, tone cool. “Why don’t I come by later.”

Naruto blinks, and then nods, and walks out, without another word.

Kakashi tries to close his mouth again. Oooookay?

Tsunade taps her finger, once, when the door clicks shut.

 

Sasuke sighs, and then turns to Kakashi. “Kakashi, can I talk to you?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, and then shrugs, lightly, keeping his tone gentle. “I have two hours?”

Sasuke nods, with a grimace, and then nods at Tsunade, before walking out, leaving the tower with slightly too energetic steps, Kakashi following him silently.

Sasuke turns left after the entrance, walking to the small garden part that is off to the side, and then stops, right in the middle of a small grassy spot, the foliage around sparse.

Kakashi steps up to him, a bit warily.

He watches Sasuke stare into space for a long moment, and then sighs, prompting softly. “Trouble in paradise?”

Sasuke grimaces, and then turns to Kakashi, glowering. “All these months, it was fine. I mean, even we found some kind of understanding, right? I mean, even after the bond engaged?”

Kakashi blinks, and then lifts his eyebrows, refusing to think too much. “Yes?”

Sasuke nods, the black hair shifting. “And we… he and I work together like on instinct, we don’t really have to think about it, I know where he is, what he’ll do, I know, I mean, I know his heart, and it’s all perfect.” The last word is spit out, and Kakashi clicks his tongue, silently. And waits.

Sasuke growls, under his breath. “And then, this mission, where we not only learned that the Uchiha willingly facilitated genocide, too, noooo, we also have…”, he breaks off, gesticulating wildly with his left hand for a moment, with a grimace, before continuing. “We also have Naruto, who is having the time of his life with Hinata, and who is discussing lineage with her, and children, and clan continuation, and genetics, and Kaguya, and…” Sasuke trails off, breathing heavily.

Kakashi frowns, trying to follow. 

He narrows his eyes, voice careful. “And… so? Therefore?”

He watches in fascination as Sasuke’s expression crumbles, a tear falling from the left eye. 

Sasuke’s voice is surprisingly brittle. “I…”, he sniffs, nodding, before continuing. “I’ve made my peace with him leaving me, eventually, for you.” He cackles, the white teeth flashing for a moment, while his eyes seem faraway. “I have. It’s logical, you know, even I can feel it, and have felt it, there, on that battlefield.” He swallows, the purple eyes wounded on Kakashi’s now. “That has been a given, something that… gives us a structure, too, something to enjoy, to the fullest, while it lasts.” Sasuke sniffs, looking away, and Kakashi swallows, harshly, trying not to think too much, while his soul yearns suddenly… and hurts, too.

Sasuke shakes his head. “But honestly, after this trip… I think he’ll leave me for a tryst with her… “ There is a snarl on Sasuke’s lips now, his tone acerbic. “For clan continuation.”

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long moment.

 

When he speaks again, his tone carries his sincerity, while he desperately tries to hide his vague amusement. “Sasuke, Naruto won’t leave you for her. Or for that goal.”

Sasuke keeps his gaze averted, mouth set in a stubborn pout.

Kakashi sighs, with a frown, deflecting a bit. “What about you, don’t you want that?”

Sasuke scoffs, and then shuffles his feet, just a bit. “Yeah, well, maybe…” He grins, widely, fake. “Who knows who my soul-mate is though. Guess it’ll be up to Itachi and”, he grimaces, with a scowl, “Obito to continue the Uchiha lineage.”

Kakashi exhales, through his nose, and then sits down, on the grass, with a sigh, letting the obvious anger in the reference to Obito go. Patting the space next to him, and giving Sasuke a small smile when he eventually sits down.

Kakashi locks his arms around his drawn up knees. 

And then shrugs. “Sasuke, Naruto has always wanted to have children. A family. To experience being a father.” He chuckles, shaking his head. “Trust me, this has thrown me for a loop already.” He shrugs again, and then bumps into Sasuke, deliberately. “Why should you be different?”

Sasuke grunts, looking away. 

Kakashi hums, raising his face to the blue sky. “Maybe he is just looking for the best way? Testing the waters?”

Sasuke scoffs. “Well, Hinata has once told him she loves him, he told me. I bet she’ll happily accept.”

Kakashi smirks, watching the clouds drift by. “Hinata has since experienced a first crush with Tenten… maybe more. Don’t think you know it all, Sasuke.”

Sasuke shoots him a look, with a frown. “Really?”

Kakashi nods, with a hum. “Really.”

Sasuke blinks, looking away again. “Huh.”

Kakashi grins to himself, and then sighs, turning his head to look at the sullen profile. “Seeing you this jealous is…” He trails off, with a shrug, and clicks his tongue when Sasuke sends him a skunk-eye. “Funny.”

Sasuke rolls his eyes.

Kakashi chuckles, under his breath. “Ah come on, I earned that.”

Sasuke rolls his eyes again, but his shoulders come down, relax, just a bit. He exhales, a long, drawn out breath, that carries the weight of the world. 

His voice is very low when he speaks, eventually. “I came back for him, you know that. For Itachi, too, of course, but we came back here, for him.”

Kakashi nods, quirking an eyebrow. I know. We have that in common. “And you still feel alien, like an outsider.”

Sasuke grimaces, picking at the grass beneath his fingers. “I was wondering if I should go onto these exchanges with other villages, too. Visit Uzushiogakure, maybe.” Sasuke’s throat clicks. “Set him free.”

Kakashi hums, trying to quiet his treacherous, suddenly galloping heart, while trying to remember that Sasuke sought him out. He came to me, for support. I cannot just break his trust. He sighs. “Those exchanges won’t be for quite a while, still. And, besides… you should probably go and take Naruto and his parents to go to the Land of Whirlpools, don’t you think?” He clicks his tongue. “I mean, Kushina-san may even remember it…”

Sasuke sniffs, and then nods, though his expression stays dark. “Yeah, well…”

Kakashi closes his eyes and then inhales, deeply. Shaking his head, once. “Sasuke, why don’t I talk to Naruto over lunch, and then we’ll see, hmm? I mean, he must have noticed something, right?”

Sasuke pulls a face, the purple eyes fixed on the village beyond, unseeing. “I guess.”

Kakashi snorts. “Of course he did. He’s much more astute than you give him credit for, especially in regards to emotions. If he hasn’t addressed it yet, there may be something more to it, don’t you think?” He pushes up, with a grunt, and then bends down to clasp Sasuke’s shoulder, squeezes it for a moment. “I’ll talk to him. Go and spend some time with your brother, and Sakura, maybe.”

Sasuke nods, and then looks up, the purple eyes sad, so sad, and yet filled with longing, and gratitude. “Thank you, Ka… Sensei.”

Kakashi swallows, harshly, the words coming with the weight of truth. “Anytime, Sasuke.”

 

And I mean it, too.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“You started without me.”

 

Naruto’s head comes up, the blue eyes glittering at Kakashi, while he noisily slurps noodles in. He chews with a grin, and then swallows, smacking his lips. “Well, I’m on my third bowl, I figured we could maybe share the fourth, and if I started early you wouldn’t have to wait for me for so long?”

Kakashi snorts, and then glides onto the stool next to him, signaling Teuchi for a bowl of his own.

He waits until he is served before he addresses Naruto again, tone careful. “Just had an interesting talk with Sasuke.”

Naruto grunts, and then slurps the broth down, before signaling for another. “I figured.”

“Mhhh.” Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “He thinks you’ll leave him for Hinata.”

Naruto freezes, mid-slurp, and then coughs, biting the noodles off, and turning to Kakashi, eyebrows raised. “What???”

Kakashi shrugs, nonchalantly, turning to Naruto as well. “I mean, it’s no secret she likes you, and word has gone around after the Pain fight and after she confided in Sakura as well, and… you’ve apparently discussed a lot of topics in regards to… procreation with her?”

Naruto blinks, and Kakashi follows the shadows of the lashes on the golden skin, totally captivated by their glow for a moment. 

Naruto’s scoff is loud. “And so he really thinks I would just dump him because of biology? THAT has him in such a bad mood??”

Kakashi narrows his eyes at him, for a moment, remembering his own jealousy, back then, when Naruto had talked about children, and how they could look. He licks his lips, makes his tone imploring. “Naruto, Sasuke came back for you. And he may seem like he is sure and imperturbable, but he is just floundering, like everyone else. And he is your age, just a kid still, and…”

Naruto interjects, tone heated. “I’m not a kid, neither is he. Not anymore.” He leans in, eyes glittering. Kakashi couldn’t swear on it, but he thinks the fangs are longer, too. “And if I remember correctly, you came back for me as well.”

Kakashi stares at him, and then leans in a bit, too, their gazes locked, noses almost touching. “Naruto, I know that you know what he feels. I know that you understand other people’s feelings very well, too well, maybe, sometimes.” He raises both his eyebrows, watching Naruto’s eyes swivel back and forth. He drops his voice to a whisper. “Why do you put on this show of… indifference?”

Naruto’s whiskers twitch, and then he rears, back, turning away. 

He locks his arms around himself, but his voice is hard. “I don’t?”

Kakashi tilts his head, watching the body language very closely, but deciding to push nonetheless. “Yes, you do. You have been pushing at me, you know very well that discussing these things with Hinata in front of him would push at him… hurt him, even. Why.”

It’s not a question, and Kakashi can see in the way Naruto’s jaw locks that he doesn’t take it as one either.

 

Naruto’s voice is a hiss when he finally answers. “I’m torn apart.”

What? Kakashi blinks, his mind racing, and he lifts his head a bit, watching Naruto’s profile closely. “I thought we were okay with postponing it…”

Naruto snarls. “Hinata approached me. She and Tenten are making plans already. They asked me for… you know.”

Kakashi blinks, mind racing. They’re making plans already? “Oh?”

Naruto sends him a skunk eye. “Yes, apparently, their bond engaged sometime during the war, when Hinata was comforting Tenten because of some… fan? Some kind of weapon.” Naruto rolls his eyes. “They’re over the moon.” He scoffs. “They are asking me and Shino, if I understood that correctly.” Naruto pushes the bowl away, crossing his arms tightly once more. His voice drops to a whisper. “It’s so simple for them.”

 

Ah.

 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, and then leans in and hugs Naruto, carefully, their audience and semi-public setting be damned, pulling him in sideways. 

Knowing Teuchi won’t tell. 

He presses his face into Naruto’s neck, the short hair tickling, the smell and reality of him divine, soothing something deep, deep in Kakashi. He breathes against Naruto’s ear. “Naruto being angry at the bond won’t help anybody, you least of all. Trust me, I know.” He sighs, and then smirks, softly, tightening his arms for a moment. “Besides, you know they would be lovely parents, don’t you. Maybe you could even come to some kind of agreement for later?”

Naruto sniffs, his head tilting back, towards Kakashi. “You think so?”

Kakashi hum, rubbing his face up and down for a moment, knowing it tickles, and enjoying how there is a twitch of a smile on Naruto’s cheek for an instant. “Yes, I do think so.” He swallows, and then exhales, the words laced with sincerity. “Anything you want, from me and Sasuke. You know that.” He swallows, and then laughs, a brittle, little laugh. “Just be gentle with our hearts.”

Naruto ducks his head, and then his one hand comes up, to clasp Kakashi’s arm.

His voice is toneless. “I haven’t been very gentle with yours, have I.” His throat clicks. “Or his.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, the sudden pain more intense than anticipated. No, not particularly. He clears his throat. “None of this is easy.” He swallows, and then draws back a bit, to tilt his head and look Naruto in the eye. Emphasizing heavily. “But it can be good.”

Naruto pushes his jaw forward a bit, and then his face crumbles, for an instant. 

His voice is wobbly, the blue eyes huge and filled with tears. “When we got back, after the war, I thought it would all be easy, you know? I mean we knew where we stood, Sasuke and I knew, my parents were here…” He grimaces, voice a shiver, a silver trail catching on his whiskers. “And I don’t know why it’s so hard, I mean, it’s still so perfect to have them here? And to be with Sasuke and to know that…” He trails off, eyes finding Kakashi’s for a long moment, the intensity between them sizzling, before breathing the words. “To anticipate.” He averts his gaze again, with a shake of his head. “I think I don’t understand myself right now.”

 

Kakashi blinks, and then smiles, broadly, with a nod. Pulling Naruto in for a long moment once more, and then letting him go, gently. 

He clicks his tongue. “And that’s alright, Naruto.”

He watches the blue eyes come up, slowly, doubtful, the golden lashes catching the lamp’s glow. Kakashi reaches up, and places his hand on Naruto’s cheek, viciously satisfied when Naruto shivers under his touch and nestles into his palm, just a bit. “These are growing pains, Naruto.” He tilts his head, just a bit, gives Naruto a deliberately exaggerated eye-smile. “Life keeps throwing us curve-balls.” He shrugs. “And it’s okay to be unmoored by them. It’s okay to muddle your way through.” He shakes his head. “And it’s okay to go and ask questions, and get ideas, and find out what you like and…” He smirks, watching Naruto swallow. “Just live.”

 

Naruto swallows, the blue eyes huge on his.

And then pushes the bowl of ramen even further away, leaning back a bit to pull out some money. “I’m sorry, I’m not hungry anymore after all.” He hesitates, his eyes on Kakashi’s almost untouched bowl. “I’ll wait, I’ll just…”

Kakashi interjects, pulling out money as well. “It’s alright. I’m not that hungry.”

He nods at Teuchi who smiles back, eyes knowing and and then Kakashi puts some bills on the counter and steps out, feeling Naruto behind him.

 

Suddenly aware that something is about to give.

 

 

 

They walk through the once more bustling streets silently, turning into the new districts in unspoken agreement. 

 

Naruto tugs Kakashi into a small alley, hand clutched into his vest, falling back against a wall.

 

The air is heavy, instantly, difficult to breathe.

 

The sounds of Konoha are muted, sluggish, far away. 

 

There’s hardly space between them, suddenly.

 

 

Naruto’s voice is a broken whisper, bleeding around the words. “I’m no cheat.” His free hand is clenched into the other side of the vest now, pulling Kakashi in further. There’s a sob in his voice. “This is killing me.”

Kakashi snarls, silently, behind his mask, and then moves forward, to align their bodies, raising his arms to lock them around Naruto’s shoulders and neck, enjoying the full-body shudder that runs through Naruto’s frame. 

He leans in, presses his clothed mouth to Naruto’s temple. “No, you are not a cheat. And, as much as you hate to hear that from me… you are not ready.” Naruto’s arms tighten to push him away, and Kakashi can feel him try to tilt his head away but Kakashi stays close, with an effort, aware that he ‘wins’ only because Naruto does not want to break his arms. He exhales, with a sigh when he can breathe properly again, his breath short from the sudden, intense exertion of staying right there, trying to keep his words even. “You chopped off your wonderful hair and changed your uniform to regain some semblance of control, but it only alienated you further.”

Naruto shivers, and then his muscles relax, the weight of the limbs hanging off of Kakashi’s vest heavy suddenly. 

Kakashi smirks, softly, painfully, whispering into gold. “You need resolution before the future can be shaped. If Hinata and Tenten think they’re ready? Good for them. Maybe they’re only making plans though, who knows. I know Itachi and Sakura are keeping it loosely coupled right now though, right?” He draws back a bit, waits until Naruto’s eyes find his. He raises his eyebrows. “That is because Sakura is extremely clever. She knows better than to rush something like this.”

Naruto sniffs, looking away again.

Kakashi hums, and then pushes in further, pressing, his right leg shifting between Naruto’s legs. 

He watches Naruto blush, eyes averted.

Kakashi asks, there between them, feeling him, intimately. “Is this why?”

Naruto tilts his head away, his throat clicking as he swallows. “I…” Naruto grimaces and then looks back, defiantly. “I cannot help but imagine?” He scoffs, and then shudders. “I mean, I…” He snorts. “I know you have so much more experience than me, and I…” He trails off, blushing furiously.

Kakashi nods, and then hums, letting his weight fall forward a bit, pressing. 

Watches Naruto’s pupils dilate.

He smiles softly, feeling warm and gentle only, despite the situation. “And you imagine what I would do. You imagine how I would feel.” He closes his eyes for a long moment, letting some of his defenses go. “You imagine how it will feel.”

Naruto gasps, soundlessly, and then his eyes find Kakashi’s, now almost black. “Do you, too?”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, and then shrugs, just a bit. “I… no. Not really.”

Naruto gasps a laugh, and then tries to withdraw again, and Kakashi grunts, tightening his arms. “No, no, no, no, hear me out.” He waits until Naruto quiets down again, with a sniff, his gaze once more averted. 

Kakashi leans in, deliberately whispering against Naruto’s ear. “I draw on the past, and what I know, because when we will happen… I don’t want to compare. I want to feel. I want this to feel right. I want us to feel right. I want us to feel home.”

Naruto’s head snaps round, and he presses his forehead to Kakashi’s, with a sob. 

Kakashi hums, and then grins, softly. “That doesn’t mean that a bit of… imagining didn’t enter my brain after you told me I’m yours the other day…”

Naruto snorts, and then exhales, shudderingly. “Yeah, well, I still need to tell my Dad that, but…”

Kakashi chuckles, and then decides to fan the flames, just a bit. He lowers his voice, the words a low rumble. “You might need to tell that to Obito, too.” He shrugs, grinning, when Naruto’s eyes snap up. “And Iruka.”

Naruto’s mouth drops open. He hisses, the sound suffused with laughter and outrage. “You didn’t.”

Kakashi leans back a bit, chuckling deeply now, and blushing, and not giving a shit. “I so did.”

Naruto’s eyebrows climb up, to his hairline. He squeaks. “What?”

Kakashi laughs at him. “I see that does not trigger the same reaction?”

Naruto lets the left side of his vest go and punches him in the shoulder, eyes glittering and tone indignant but underlaid with laughter. “Are you making fun of me?”

Kakashi grunts, withdrawing his right arm to rub his smarting shoulder, with a grin. “No?”

Naruto raises his hand and rubs it over his face, voice muffled. “I don’t believe you.” He drops his hand. “Why are you telling me this?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Oh, you know. Sasuke is so much more demanding, and you enjoy so much what you have and…”

Naruto hits him again, lightly, and Kakashi breaks off, snickering.

Naruto shakes his head, tongue over his teeth, unable to hide his grin. “Ass.”

Kakashi grins at him, and then shrugs, tone light. “Well you told me I could do anything you do?”

Naruto rolls his eyes, and then pokes a finger. “But I didn’t have a threesome??”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, and then clicks his tongue, enjoying himself immensely. “Not yet?”

Naruto narrows his eyes at him, and then shakes his head, slowly, eyes blue fire. “No, not yet.”

 

They share a long look, and it shivers down Kakashi’s spine, more intensely than standing so close or speaking this frankly have done before. 

More than actually feeling Naruto’s cock press against his own does. 

 

He clears his throat, feeling the heat between them. 

 

Naruto tilts his head, lets it fall back against the wall. “So… Sensei…”, he grins, watching Kakashi like a hawk, “what do you think of my new haircut?”

Kakashi exhales, and then lets his gaze wander, deliberately slow. 

Lets his gaze linger, on Naruto’s lips, too, the freedom to do so a fever rush.

 

He raises a finger, lets it trail down the side of Naruto’s face, and throat. “Well, it shows more of your forehead, and temple, and ears, and jaw, and…”, he locks his eyes with Naruto’s, using another word, deliberately. “Jugular.”

Naruto snorts, quirking an eyebrow. “Jugular?” His eyes are vacant for a split-second. “Oh come on Kurama, he won’t bite me??”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, watching the exchange with vague amusement-mixed mortification. “Not very hard?”

Naruto rolls his eyes. And then grins. “Kurama says he’s looking forward to it.”

Kakashi blinks, and then tilts his head, with a frown. “Why is… the nine-tails rooting for me?”

Naruto pulls a bit of a face. “Kurama doesn’t like Sasuke much. He says that his chakra feels too much like Madara’s did… and you know, Madara is old and bad history for him.”

Kakashi hums, nodding. “Alright, but that doesn’t explain why he doesn’t not like me either?”

Naruto blushes, and then shrugs, his eyes finding Kakashi’s. “I told you. He watches.” Naruto swallows. “He has seen, a lot. Sometimes beyond what I can remember.”

Kakashi blinks, and then swallows, tightening his arm and moving in again, to hug Naruto to himself, silently, the mood instantly… intimate and innocent again. Or, as innocent as can be with our bodies tightly slotted together. 

Still. 

He presses a kiss to the small patch of skin behind Naruto’s ear, before moving back, slowly. With a smile.

He grins, a bit forcedly. “Well. I mean, it is nice to be accepted by… Kurama. Please extend my thanks.” He swallows, eyes unseeing for a moment. “I wonder if he would like to speak to Kushina and Minato as well.” He frowns, looking at Naruto. “Have you? I mean, relayed messages or something?”

Naruto shakes his head, and then pushes off the wall, slowly, and Kakashi steps back, shivering when there is suddenly cold air between them, the loss of contact almost brutal, and bitter, on his tongue. 

Naruto smirks softly. “I’ve offered, but Kurama only huffs. I think that still takes some time.”

Kakashi hums. “Yeah, I can imagine.”

 

He tilts his head, watching the mobile face smirk, a bit wryly, feeling for the answer he knows he will get. “Better now?”

Naruto frowns, and then exhales, in a rush. “Weirdly, yes.”

Kakashi smirks, and then nods, reaching up to right the collar on the loosely cut black shirt. “Black suits you.”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow. “Yeah, well, my Dad often wears light colors, I…”

Kakashi hums, continuing the thought. “You wanted to look different than him.”

Naruto grimaces, and then shakes his head once. “He is 24… or was. He could be my brother??”

Kakashi snorts. “Yeah, well… that has not only you thrown for a loop.” He narrows his eyes, and then nods, keeping his voice light. “And your Mom is hot.”

Naruto groans, loudly, and hides his face in his hands, the words muffled. “I know.”

Kakashi starts to chuckle, helplessly. “Is that why you haven’t told them off in regards to me? Because every time you try you remember what I told you they were doing then, and you cannot help imagining?”

Naruto grunts, pained, and Kakashi starts to laugh, full-bellied now. “Oh god, that’s it, isn’t it.”

Naruto whines. “And to top it all off, Kurama has memories of them… you know?” Naruto spreads his fingers, staring through them at Kakashi in half-mock half-serious panic. “And every time we argue about something he is threatening to tell me about the night I was conceived.”

Kakashi stumbles back, bending over with laughter, wheezing, and he’s not aware he is crying tears of laughter now, just that his mask is getting wet.

 

He surprises himself by feeling affection for the fox, and a weird kind of kinship. Seems like Kurama has quite the humor… and he was locked in a cage for so long, too. Maybe…

He grins, and then snorts once more, letting the thought go for now, raising his laughing eyes to Naruto’s. 

 

Naruto joins in after a moment, his words tumbling over each other, suffused with laughter, but something else, too, something that grates. “And you know, the whole thing and our thing, and the thing with Sasuke, and the thing with Kaguya and the war, and the thing with Obito and Sensei Iruka, and the thing with all my friends pairing up…”, he swallows, suddenly dead serious again, and Kakashi straightens up again, with a sniff, watching him, “and the thing with you becoming Hokage and I bet you won’t have any time then, will you, and you won’t take me to all the diplomatic affairs, because I will need to learn and become a Jonin, and do missions, and teach at the academy, and lead a genin team, and…” Naruto trails off, with a sniff of his own.

Kakashi watches him, and swallows, smirking softly. “Curve balls.”

Naruto snorts, and lowers his gaze. He nods after a moment. “Yes.”

Kakashi nods, too, and then exhales, lifting his face to the sky. “So. Ever got shit-faced before?”

Naruto snorts, and then lifts his eyebrows, shaking his head. “Errr… No?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, and then nods, turning away just a bit. “I heard there was a party tonight.”

Naruto blinks, and then quirks an eyebrow. “Yeah, I heard that, too.”

Kakashi hums, and shrugs. “Time to do shots with your parents, don’t you think? Break the barrier of memories and… conventions?”

Naruto stares at him. “By getting drunk?”

Kakashi winks at him. “You’d be surprised.” He leans in a bit. “It’s medicine.”

“Uh huh….” Naruto narrows his eyes at him. “How much medicine led to that threesome?”

Kakashi snorts. “See. I always say you’re unexpectedly cunning.”

Naruto snorts, too. He licks his lips, looking away, and then grimaces. “But you’re not expecting that to happen to us tonight, I mean…”

Kakashi grunts, eyes wide. “Oh god, no.” He holds up his hands. “No way.” He lowers his hands again, and then grins. “Just some medicine then, tonight.”

Naruto blinks. “Alright.” He smirks, and then exhales, before coming up and hugging Kakashi. “Thank you, Kakashi.” He swallows, the whisper sending shivers down Kakashi’s spine. “Kaka-kun.”

 

And Kakashi hugs him, tightly, pressing into the furnace of heat and summer. “Anytime.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Black on black on black?”

 

Kakashi turns, to wink at Iruka and Obito, who are both wearing loose, creme-colored tunic-like garments. He nods. “But with silver trimmings… I see you took a lesson from Sora-san…”

Obito snorts, and then shrugs. “It’s comfortable.” They share a grin, and Obito nods at the entrance, and the people already milling in the refitted and decorated arena. “This brings back memories?”

Kakashi hums, shooting the arena a look. “Yes, though I didn’t expect to throw a party in here, ever.”

Iruka nods, tone dry. “Well, the floor won’t be drenched in blood tonight at least.”

Obito weighs his head. “You hope.”

Kakashi snorts. “Well, we’ll see.”

Iruka eyes him, tone amused. “So. Who’s here already, and why are you playing welcoming committee?”

Kakashi raises his eyebrow. “Well, they are here, and Sora is here, and Kaguya and lots of guards, and our friends and colleagues are all here…”

Iruka smirks. “But?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “For once I’m on time, and Naruto is late.”

Obito chuckles, under his breath. 

Kakashi has the distinct urge to flip him the bird, but refrains, opting for a skunk-eye instead.

Iruka nods, and then drags Obito forward, by his elbow. “Okay, we’re going to get a drink, do come by later, oh ye guest of honor.”

Kakashi grunts. “Ha ha.”

Obito calls back to him, over his shoulder, voice sing-song. “Don’t forget to breathe!”

Kakashi blinks, frowning and looking after them. Breathe? Why should I forget to…

 

Thoughts flee as Naruto drops down before him, Sasuke right next to him.

Kakashi blinks, stunned into silence indeed. 

 

Naruto is clad in a form fitting black suit with orange trimmings, the white shirt with an open collar complimenting his skin beautifully. There’s a handkerchief tugged into the lapel, matching the color of his eyes, and with gold threads woven through. Next to him, Sasuke is wearing a suit with purple trimmings, and a purple handkerchief.

They look absolutely stunning.

 

Kakashi looks them up and down, noting the linked hands.

 

He clears his throat. “Nice.” He blinks, and then blushes, and then tries to backpedal a bit. “Err, I mean, thank you for coming, glad you’re here…”

Naruto laughs at him, eyes glittering. “Not what you expected?”

Kakashi lifts his eyebrows, dead-serious. “Nope.”

Sasuke laughs, too, ducking his head, looking up at Kakashi a bit sheepishly, a lot of the anger and animosity of before missing. 

Naruto grins, with a click of his tongue. “Yeah, well, we decided after… we talked and after… all the shit discussions we put you through today…”, he tugs at Sasuke’s hand, and they share a small, quick smile, “that we would go and present pleasantly tonight…” Naruto waggles his eyebrows. “You know. Properly.”

Kakashi hums, narrowing his eyes. “Properly?”

Naruto weighs his head. “Yeahhhhh….” He smirks. “Baa-chan said you would come in black, likely… so I thought we should match.”

Kakashi blinks, and then looks down at himself, at the black suit, with the black tank top with attached mask he wears underneath. “Well, almost a match, yes.”

Naruto grins, and then pulls out a silver handkerchief, and stuffs it into Kakashi’s lapel. “That’s why we brought this.” He clicks his tongue when he’s done, looking at Sasuke. “Sasuke is purple now, complimenting my orange. But he is also lightning, complimenting your lightning and silver. And your silver is complimenting my gold. We’re linked.” He blinks, looking back at Kakashi, with eyes that see too much, and show too little. “So… Let’s rock this party?”

 

Kakashi blinks, slowly, and then swallows, stepping back, mind empty, not recognizing his own voice. “Yeah. Let’s do that.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

The first shots are shared with Gaara and Mei, who insist.

 

And to Naruto’s loud and very vocal complaining when he realizes that Gaara already knows what he’s doing.

Gaara, whose green eyes watch, seeing it all.

And who offers the next shot to Kakashi, with a small smirk.

 

Kakashi watches the light play on Naruto’s throat as he throws the shot back, way too enthusiastically, with Obito wearing a sympathetic expression while only nipping on his first.

 

“Corrupting my son here?”

 

Kakashi blinks, turning to Kushina, who is winking at him.

He shrugs, tone quoting. “Medicine.”

Kushina raises her eyebrows, turning slightly to accept a glass of champagne from Minato, who extends another one to Kakashi. “Medicine?”

Kakashi hums, watching the flush on Naruto’s cheeks, watching Sasuke’s shoulders come down, slowly, while Gaara and Naruto laugh. “Yeah. He needs this, badly. He needs the catharsis that comes with a total and full shit-show of a hangover.”

Minato snorts, and then grimaces, raising his eyebrows. “Ah, the poor boy.”

Kushina tilts her head, voice low. “Why does he need said shit-show though?”

Kakashi sighs and then leans in, trying to find the words for a moment. “He is struggling, a lot. We had a talk today. Actually I had a talk with Sasuke, too, who is also struggling.” He shrugs. 

Kushina blinks up at him, her dark eyes searching his. “Struggling?”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, shooting a look back to check that Naruto is still occupied with Gaara. He lowers his voice. “Lots of little things. And I think he is afraid I won’t have any time to spend with him anymore, soon.”

Minato grimaces, while sharing a look with Kushina. “A valid fear.” He quirks an eyebrow at Kakashi’s look. “Don’t tell me you don’t remember the hours we put in back then. Me behind that desk, and you, putting in extra shifts…”

Kakashi grimaces. “I know.” He frowns, returning his gaze to Kushina. “How did you cope?”

Kushina clicks her tongue, while taking a sip of her champagne. “I trained you, remember?”

Kakashi ducks his head, with a sad little smirk and she continues, nodding at Naruto. “He will be busy soon, too. Already is, if I understood that correctly. I know the Godaime has given him lots of time off, all things considered, but he is a ninja of Konoha, an active ninja, on active duty, and he has been on a few missions already since we came back.” She licks her lips, shrugging. “Honestly, you will just have to make the time, Kakashi.” She looks up at Minato for a moment, before she winks at Kakashi. “Minato and I did. We had a room at the tower, too.”

Kakashi clears his throat, refusing to blush. “Yeah, well, we won’t need that yet, so…”

Minato interjects, tone calm. “I disagree. You should set up a room for the two of you as well. Not  for sex, though that can come later”, he pauses, and Kakashi tries not to fidget, his face feeling like a furnace, “but for closeness. Read together. Eat together. Cuddle. With Sasuke maybe, too.”

Kakashi blinks, and lowers his gaze, his stomach in turmoil for a long moment. 

He clears his throat. “Yeah, well, I’ll see.”

Kushina smirks, gently. “Sasuke is part of this bond, whether it is by choice or design may be up for debate, but he’ll be the one to shape it. Choose wisely, Kakashi.”

Kakashi grunts, reaching for another flute of champagne that someone is carrying by on a tablet, his mask wet. He watches Naruto gesticulate for a moment, the blue eyes fixed on Gaara’s green, and laughter all around them, their friends and colleagues hovering close to hear whatever story Naruto is telling right now. For a moment, the mark on Naruto’s right palm is visible.

Kakashi frowns. “That mark. Have you talked to him about that?”

Minato nods. “Yes. And I have found notes of it, and Sasuke’s in the archive as well.” He quirks an eyebrow. “Apparently Rikkudo Sennin’s sons wore them, too, indicating their skills, healing and controlling respectively.”

Kakashi hums, looking over at Kaguya for a moment, who is watching the light filter through her fingers, with Tsunade and Genma hovering close. “So they really are some kind of reincarnation?”

Kushina shrugs. “Well, I can only say that we created him the traditional way.” She grins, and then sobers, with a little sigh. “Supposedly the marks denote the polar opposites. Opposites can attract, or repel.” She weighs her head. “I guess we’re lucky they attract.”

Kakashi sighs, through his nose. “Yeah.”

 

They are silent for a moment, the background noise of dozens of voices soothing in its own right.

Eventually, Kushina speaks up, her hand coming up to squeeze Kakashi’s shoulder. “I’m going to go and talk to Tsunade, Sora and Kaguya. Why don’t you go for a drink with Minato?” She lifts her gaze to Kakashi and he recognizes the gaze, this gaze that brooks no argument. 

He smirks, softly. “Alright.”

She grins at him and then pushes up onto the tip of her toes, and presses a kiss to Minato’s lips, and then she’s gone, and both Kakashi and Minato watch her go for a moment, with a shared grin.

Minato shoots him a look. “Sake?”

Kakashi weighs his head, and then turns to the bar set up with a few tables off to the side with him. “Sure.”

 

He waits till they’re settled at one corner, both with glass in hand before asking Minato, tone dry. “So. What does she want us to talk about.”

Minato grins, for a moment, and then shrugs, his expression sobering. “Us?” He lifts his eyebrows, his blue eyes finding Kakashi’s. “Me. What I did to you.”

Kakashi blinks, and averts his gaze, feeling flayed open suddenly. He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “What you did to me?”

Minato hums, watching the reflections of light in his glass. “Yes.”

Kakashi swallows, his throat clicking. “You…” His throat closes on ‘didn’t do anything’, the instant deflection impossible to voice. Kakashi shivers, looking away, trying to get his unresponsive tongue to work properly.

Minato sighs, almost soundlessly. “I know you know the reasons. I know you know the logic.” His voice softens, and there is a tremble to it now that cuts. “But emotions are a different beast.” Minato swallows, and then turns his head, the blue gaze piercing, his words very calm, precisely shaped. “I hurt you.”

Kakashi shivers. 

Minato works his jaw for a moment, his eyes huge and dark. “You were 14, and I burdened you with the future of this village.” He clicks his tongue. “I put you in a… cage.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, lifting a hand to hide his face in it, the mask in his palm the only thing that seems to hold the pieces of him together, the pieces that feel jagged, his whole being bleeding out and shattered, with a sudden intensity that is completely unanticipated, and definitely unsettling. Yes. You did. A cage impossible to escape from. Like Kurama. 

Minato smiles, sadly. “And I knew I would, too.” His throat clicks, as he swallows, a shudder in his voice. “I decided to trust fate, but I knew what it would cost you.”

Kakashi sniffs, squeezing the bridge of his nose, and then shakes his head, voice raw. “It’s costing him, too, and, I mean, you literally died, what higher cost can there be, I mean…”

Minato interjects, with a broad, wounding smile. “To give up peace, and come back?” Kakashi closes his eyes, shivering, and Minato continues, with a whisper. “I did not come back from peace, Kakashi. I… gladly left that realm.” He swallows. “Kushina gladly left, too, to spend time with him, but then she was hungering for an opportunity.” He leans in, just a bit. “But you… you came back for him. Decided to take on that responsibility, this task. Forfeit peace for the years of pain that you knew would still come.” Minato’s voice trembles. “I’m so proud of you.”

Kakashi reaches for his glass, glad when his hand is not shaking. 

He snorts, with a sniff. “And here I thought I had accepted all that. Made my peace with it.” But it still hurts, despite everything. 

Minato hums. “Naruto told me you offered.”

Kakashi grimaces. “I… needed to, one last time.” A small, proud smile flits over Kakashi’s face, there and gone again. “He declined.” And now there’s this anticipation, that suffuses everything. 

Minato takes a sip, and then tilts his head towards him, tone low. “And it’s different now, isn’t it.” He smirks again. “Thunder in the distance?”

Kakashi shrugs, a bit sheepishly. “He said ‘we are the thunder’… some old song.” He snorts, and ducks his head a bit, feeling just the tiniest bit more grounded again. “I looked it up the other day, it’s a very… intense song.” He debates saying the title out loud, but for some reason his throat is stuck on the words ‘we belong’, the reality of them coming with gravity somehow.

Minato hums, watching him closely. “Choices lead to repercussions.”

Kakashi blinks, raising his gaze to Minato’s, with a frown.

Minato clicks his tongue. “It is hard to do the right thing.” He pulls a face. “That is why, for so often, people choose to do the easy thing, the wrong thing.” He averts his gaze, for a moment, before returning his gaze to Kakashi. “Knowing the truth back then… it freed me to make decisions without the… worry for the future.” He hesitates, and then amends. “Or, better, without the possibility of the worry for the future.” Minato exhales, closing his eyes, and turning his face up, just a bit. “Knowledge always comes with responsibility. That is why ignorance can be such a bliss.” He clicks his tongue again, and then shrugs, playing with the glass for a moment. “But I knew. And as such…” 

He sighs, and then laughs, a short, bitter laugh. “I just thought I would have a bit more time to shape this village, you know?” He reopens his eyes and shoots Kakashi a look, and then shrugs. “Just a bit more time, to mend the problems with the Uchiha, to flood out some of the ones drawing strings.” 

Minato swallows, and then lifts his glass, watching the light dance off the reflections for a moment. “But Kushina got pregnant. And I knew my time was up.” Minato blinks, a tear falling down onto the bar. “Our time was up.” He sniffs. “I had hoped for more time to… heal you.”

 

Kakashi blinks, averting his gaze, deliberately not feeling. 

Minato’s voice is a caress. “I had hoped for more time for her to heal you.”

Kakashi exhales, shudderingly, his voice broken. “Why did you send me away that day? I mean, I didn’t have any day off, for weeks, why that day, why…”

Minato smiles, softly, sadly. “There were reports of someone appearing in the village. A blood moon was rising. I… had a bad feeling.”

Kakashi raises his head, turns it to watch Minato, for a long moment. 

He shakes his head, tone… off. “You sent me away because of a bad feeling?”

Minato smirks wryly, raising his eyebrows. “Surprise?”

Kakashi snorts, with a shiver.

Minato hums, and then rolls his wrist, watching the sake slosh a bit in the glass. “I knew that you shouldn’t be where it happened. That you… must not be where it happened.” He swallows, and then taps his finger against the glass, twice. “Because then… you wouldn’t have survived.”

Kakashi snarls, behind his mask. “You cannot know that.”

Minato chuckles, and then bumps into him, with his shoulder, on purpose. “Ah come on, Kaka-kun? You know you would‘ve thrown yourself in front of us?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes.

Minato grins, a real grin, for a moment.

He sighs, with a shrug. “Time has this stupid way of clicking into place with reality.” He waggles his eyebrows, for a moment. “I mean we, Kushina and I, we got lucky.” He smirks at Kakashi, and Kakashi echoes it, and then Minato sobers, slowly, his blue eyes pulling Kakashi’s in. “And now there is not much I can tell you left… you managed just fine without me.”

Kakashi scoffs, opening his mouth, but Minato lifts a finger off the glass, waiting until Kakashi snaps his mouth shut again, before continuing, with a grin. “You did. You shaped this village, and Naruto’s life, more than you will ever truly know.” Minato tilts his head. “And you will continue to, soon.” He takes a sip, and then hums. “So the only thing I can properly tell you now is… to embrace it.”

Kakashi blinks, with a frown. “Embrace it?”

Minato hums, and then shrugs. “Yes. Don’t just accept the hat. The responsibility. The decisions. The… knowledge. The bond. But embrace it.”

Kakashi averts his gaze, taking another sip, the wet mask sticking to his lips. 

Minato bumps into him again, gently, his whisper loud. “There are benefits to wearing the hat, you know…”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, I know, get a room at the tower and all that.”

Minato chuckles, softly. “That, too, but also just…” He shrugs. “Go home or to him when it gets too much. Choose the tasks you want to see done. Train, regularly, whenever you feel like it. Get a private pool at the onsen.” Minato clicks his tongue, tone dry. “The paperwork will still be there the next day, believe me.”

Kakashi snorts. Yeah, I bet.

He shoots Minato a look. “Is it really that easy?”

Minato lifts his eyebrows. “Easy? No. But if you embrace it, it does get easier.” Minato’s eyes find his. “I know you already know about responsibility and hard decisions.” He snorts. “Honestly, when I took the hat I was a lot more naive than you.”

Kakashi lifts his eyes, waggling them a bit, tone amused. “Bullshit.”

Minato grins. “It’s true though?” He sighs, softly. “I was battle experienced, and burdened with this knowledge of what would be, but…” He shakes his head. “I also thought I would be able to do more, as I said.” He grimaces. “Prevent some things.”

Kakashi swallows, his head turning to find Obito, for a moment, chuckling when he sees him with Sakura and Itachi on the other side of the room, the sudden rush of emotions accompanying the image a flood of good. 

He clicks his tongue. “You’re here to shape the future with me now”, he hesitates, and then adds, with a small smile, “Sensei.”

Minato grins again, just the tiniest bit wobbly. “And I probably won’t be able to help it.” They share a chuckle, and Minato nods over at Kushina, who is talking energetically to Kaguya, while Tsunade and Sora look on rather amusedly. “Neither will she, I bet.” He takes another sip of his sake. “Have you thought about what use you will put us to? I mean… we kinda owe you?”

Kakashi blinks, and then shrugs, with a shake of his head. “Not really, no.” He smirks, and then bumps into Minato’s shoulder, softly. “Just loving him?”

Minato hums, and then weighs his head, pretending to think about it. “Mmmmmhhh, we’ll see about that.”

Kakashi chuckles.

 

Naruto’s voice interrupts them, making them both turn round. “Dad, you’re hogging Kakashi. Who is supposed to be the guest of honor…” 

Kakashi lifts his glass, tone teasing. “We were just getting another drink?” He watches Naruto’s eyes lock on his, the flush on his face alluring. “I see you had a few?”

Naruto snorts, and then steps forward, right in-between him and Minato, turning to lean against the bar. “Yeah, well, after Gaara there was Mei-sama, and then Sai came by, and Sakura and Itachi…” He narrows his eyes. “But you’ve been so deep in conversation over here… Do I need to worry?” There is something in his tone that shivers through Kakashi, feeling good.

Minato smirks, softly, and then shakes his head. “No.”

Naruto turns his head to look at him, and then clicks his tongue. “Good.”

Minato’s head falls back the tiniest bit, catches Kakashi’s gaze behind Naruto’s head, for just a moment. His eyes crinkle, and Kakashi grins, to himself. 

Feeling warm.

 

Minato clicks his tongue, and then pushes off, with a sigh. “I’ll go and… rescue Kaguya.” He winks. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do?”

Kakashi snorts, toasting him with a glass. “Oh, why thank you for the… permission, Sensei.”

Minato snickers, and leaves, and Naruto blinks, vaguely peeved. “Ah, that is so unfair? All these… insinuations, and you won’t tell me?”

Kakashi grins, turning sideways to look at Naruto properly, watching Naruto turn to him as well.

He hums. “I cannot, not really. Not if he doesn’t tell.”

Naruto rolls his eyes, and then reaches out, to touch Kakashi’s wet mask, the small touch snapping through Kakashi, stealing his breath. 

Naruto licks his lips, eyes dark, and Kakashi has the sudden impression that he knows very well what he is doing. “Come and make the rounds with me?”

Kakashi blinks, his brain suddenly sluggish, the warmth of the finger on his clothed lips his very center of gravity. He forces the words out. “Where’s Sasuke?”

Naruto grins, and tilts his head towards the other corner of the arena. “Sensei Guy has decided to tell Mei-sama aaaaaall about Sasuke… and has dragged him along.”

Kakashi snorts, his eyes searching and finding the little group after a moment, watching Sasuke hover close, kept in place by Guy’s arm around his waist.

He lowers his voice. “And he’s trying.”

Naruto smirks, softly. “Yes.”

They share a quick look, and Naruto’s finger drops away, leaving Kakashi feeling bereft.

Naruto bits his lips. Repeating, softly. “Come with me and make the rounds?”

 

Kakashi shrugs, lightly. Saying the only thing he can, while he knows he is staring - and not giving the slightest fuck. “Of course?”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi hovers in front of the entrance to the hall, watching Obito and Iruka and a few of the other last surviving party guests weave their way home through the mean obstacle course of an empty street, snickering to himself.

He grins at Tsunade, who looks mightily sober, all things considered, despite all the drinks he knows she had.

She grins back, obviously guessing his thoughts. “Regeneration jutsus are quite handy for hangovers.” She quirks an eyebrow. “Want me to remove yours before it manifests?”

Kakashi yawns, belatedly lifting his hand, and shaking his head, glad when his tongue does what he wants. “No thank you. Since I have the day off I will nurse it like the responsible adult I am… sulking in the dark.”

They share a snicker, and Tsunade shrugs, her eyes sparkling. “Suit yourself.” She lifts her face up to the fading stars. “This was a good night. A good party.”

Kakashi hums, nodding carefully as not to make the world shake too much.

Tsunade smirks. “And a good speech. Borrowed a few talking points from your Sensei?”

Kakashi blinks, following her gaze up to the lightening night sky, remembering himself talk about choices and acceptance. Remembering Naruto’s eyes while he spoke, the only thing that had mattered. “A few.” He shakes his head once, the world spinning a bit. “We talked, earlier.”

Tsunade nods. “Yes.” She shoots him a look, from the corner of her eyes. “You needed that.”

Kakashi blinks, with a frown. Admitting. “Yes. I needed that.” More than I was aware I did.

Tsunade hums. “You know he’s up there.”

Kakashi smiles, broadly. “Of course.”

Tsunade chuckles, and then steps forward, clasping Kakashi’s shoulder in passing. “Enjoy your hangover, Kakashi.”

Kakashi grunts, tone dry. “I will.”

 

 

 

He waits until she is gone and he is alone, save for a crew that is starting to clean now, and changing the hall back into the training hall it usually is. 

 

And then he jumps up onto Minato’s stone head, vaguely relieved that his limbs are still doing what he wants, though they feel sluggish, and he can feel the headache throb, in the background still, but threatening.

 

He drops down next to Naruto, shivering with the cold wind up here, and not caring the slightest bit, because Naruto lifts his head, smiling at him, like the sun.

Naruto lifts a finger of his right hand to his mouth, whispering. “Shhhh. He just fell asleep.”

Kakashi grins, settling silently next to Naruto, Sasuke’s head on Naruto’s lap, stretched out on the other side. 

He keeps his voice low. “He really outdid himself tonight, patience-wise.”

Naruto chuckles, under his breath. “Oh yes. Though I know he was sorely tempted to use his displacement powers when Guy dragged him over to his team, apparently Lee and Guy were a beast of their own.”

Kakashi grins, and then nods, with a small sigh. “Right, Lee. I haven’t talked to him yet. How is he?”

Naruto shrugs. “Good. Powerfully motivated. He’s ecstatic to have witnessed the Gates and still have Guy.” Naruto blinks, and then sobers, shooting a look at Kakashi. “I can empathize, you know.”

Kakashi smiles softly, and then reaches up to run his fingers through Naruto’s short hair, watching Naruto push into the touch, softly. He whispers. “Yeah, me too.”

Naruto smiles, just a bit wobbly, and then turns to press a kiss to Kakashi’s pulse point. 

Speaking against it. “Will you watch the sunrise with me?”

Kakashi hums, while a tingle spreads down his arm. “That is why I’m here.”

Naruto grins, and then draws back a bit, turning his face to the lightening sky, eyes closing.

Kakashi watches the light play on it for a moment, and then does the same.

 

Sasuke sighs, in his sleep.

 

Kakashi reopens his eyes and throws him an amused look, vaguely surprised when he doesn’t feel anything beyond gentle acceptance, the jab of jealousy he anticipated never manifesting.

Naruto’s voice is a low hum, there between them. “It’s easier, since we talked, earlier today.”

Kakashi blinks, examining his feelings. “I guess.” He frowns a bit. “Why though?”

Naruto chuckles, soundlessly, his teeth flashing. “I guess… it’s because I’m not fighting it anymore?” He clicks his tongue. “I mean, I’m not repressing it, and Sasuke and I talked?” He tilts his head, just a bit, to find Kakashi’s eyes with his own. “I felt your emotional turmoil, earlier this evening, when you talked to my Dad.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, watching the blue light up with the first light of morning. “I felt the turmoil and need in you, when you came in to report.”

Naruto blinks, and then nods, expression indecipherable. “It’s addictive to feel…”

Kakashi swallows, watching the wind play with the short tufts of Naruto’s hair. It is.

He feels for the bond now, feeling the soft thrum, deliberately letting the tickle spread from his tattoo.

A slow smile spreads over Naruto’s face. “I can feel you reaching out. It shivers through my very core somehow.” He swallows, the smile turning sad, gaze falling to the young man now snoring in his lap. “I wish I could feel him like that, too.”

 

Kakashi swallows, letting the words stand by themselves, unable and unwilling to break the sincerity of them.

 

Naruto breaks the silence once more, eventually, with a sigh. “I think we need to put up a basket with blankets for the winter, don’t you think?”

Kakashi hums, watching the first tendrils of the sun creep through Konoha. “If we make this our…” He trails off, searching for the correct word.

Naruto smirks, finishing the statement for him. “Getaway?”

Kakashi grunts. “I thought we wanted to set up a shop of Ichiraku’s on that plane somewhere?”

Naruto grins, and then chuckles, under his breath, while his left hand fingers starts to thread through Sasuke’s hair. “Right.” He shoots Kakashi a look, with a quick frown. “It doesn’t feel wrong anymore, you know?”

Kakashi blinks, turning his head to look at him. The words are hard to shape. “It felt wrong?”

Naruto shakes his head, immediately. “No, not us.” He grimaces. “Them knowing did though.” He snorts. “I don’t know why.”

Kakashi blinks, tone off. “Maybe it’s a precaution.”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “Yeah, well, I doubt that.” He swallows. “I actually rather think it might have been my own inner conflict… I was so torn, for so long.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “I wanted to have it all, and knew I couldn’t.”

Kakashi swallows, and then nods, with a sigh. “You were always way too aware for your own good.” He snorts. “I remembered something during the war, something we talked about during that first big mission…” He shakes his head, his voice shivering. “I was too stuck in my own problems to properly realize all the things you noticed… I’m sorry.”

Naruto nods, and then picks up Kakashi’s left hand with his right, squeezing it. “Don’t be.” Naruto smiles, beatifically. “We’re here, now, we made it. That’s all that counts.”

 

Kakashi nods, and sniffs, turning Naruto’s hand in his own, and reaching to hold it in both of his, tracing his right index finger over the mark there. “Tell me about this?”

Naruto blinks. “Oh, that.” He shrugs. “I’ve already written a report for baa-chan, but the short version is, that when Sasuke and I managed to open the proverbial doors for Haguromo he finalized our powers… manifesting the split powers of the mythical Rikkudo Sennin into our flesh.”

Kakashi blinks, tracing the small circle. “It looks like a tattoo.”

Naruto nods, twitching a bit, the skin Kakashi is tracing obviously tickling. “Yeah, though I didn’t feel it being applied.”

Kakashi nods. “A seal then.”

Naruto hums. “Likely.”

Kakashi raises his eyebrow. “It connects you and Sasuke.” He lifts his gaze to Naruto’s, winking at him, gently. “Just as we are connected, you and he are connected as well.” He waggles his eyebrows. “Looks like you get it all after all.”

Naruto snorts, softly, and then laces his fingers through Kakashi’s, whispering. “I got more.”

Kakashi shivers, touching the stone beneath them with his right hand. “I think we both got more.”

Naruto sniffs, and then nods, while Sasuke mumbles something in his sleep.

 

Kakashi chuckles, under his breath, nodding at Sasuke. “How come you are not totally hung over?”

Naruto grins, broadly. “I asked Kurama to cure it… I wanted to sit here, and enjoy it, too.”

Kakashi hums, watching the sun light up Naruto, giving him an otherworldly glow. Heavily emphasizing the word to take the sting out. “Cheating after all?”

Naruto chuckles, tongue sticking out for a split second. “Just using my resources.”

Kakashi grunts. “Remind me not to try to drink you under the table then.”

Naruto mock-whines. “Oh no, I had so looked forward to that?”

Kakashi snickers, and then sighs, soundlessly, with a shrug. “Well, I’m going to be whimpering in the dark in a little while…”

Naruto waggles his eyebrows, with a pout. “Don’t want to stay here?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, enjoying the teasing. “Your lap is already taken?”

Naruto shoots him an amused look. “You could sit behind me and hug me to yourself?”

Kakashi weighs his head, pretending to need to think about it. “You mean push my nose into your neck and watch a new day begin with you in my arms while my head splits open?”

Naruto’s grin is full of feeling. “Wouldn’t you like that?”

 

And Kakashi lifts Naruto’s hand in his to his mouth, presses a kiss to the knuckles, delighting in the blush that creeps over Naruto’s face immensely. 

 

Whispering against the skin, and inhaling deeply. “Yeah. I would.”

 

 

 

 

Chapter 48: Spring blossoms

Notes:

Kakashi canonically drags his feet taking the hat… since I wanted to include some parts of the Kakashi Hiden novel (next chapter)… I figured including that wouldn’t hurt :P

And: Guys, friends, my beloved readers… I got a comment by g.o.d on the last chapter…. We have arrived, whoop whoop, LOL 🥳

EDIT (Sept. 4th, 2022): Fanart added by the incredible SD_27. *sniffs* Thank you so much dear?!?!

Chapter Text

 

 

 

Naruto vibrates in front of him, blue eyes sparkling, while he tugs on Kakashi’s lapel. “Oh, this is so exciting!”

Kakashi grunts, and then lightly swats his hands away, watching Naruto’s grin turn to shit-eating for a moment. “And you’re enjoying my nervosity you imp.”

Naruto’s grin turns into a broad smile, fangs flashing. “Oh, absolutely.” He leans in, eyebrows waggling. “Sensei.”

Kakashi grunts, not dignifying that with an answer. 

Naruto laughs, under his breath.

 

Sasuke speaks up, from the corner of the room where he had settled watching Naruto flitter around Kakashi. “You’re a menace.”

Naruto waggles his eyebrows and head at him, voice sing-song. “And you both love it!!”

Kakashi snorts. “We love you, there’s the tiniest bit of a difference.”

Naruto snorts, too, and then leans in, eyes blue fire. Whispering, breathlessly. “The good, the bad and the ugly?”

Sasuke coughs a laugh. “Today? Definitely.”

Naruto snickers, and then throws his head back, just a bit. “Ugh, I’m so glad that they chose the cherry-blossoming in May… it’s already warm again, thank goodness.”

Kakashi smirks, watching the whiskers quiver. “Ah come on. This winter was only bad because central heating was still scarce for some… the next will be all warm and cozy again.”

Sasuke interjects, tone dry as the desert. “If you don’t go and destroy Konoha again.”

Naruto leans sideways, to shoot him a skunk-eye. “Ha ha.”

Kakashi grins. “He is not totally wrong, you know?”

Naruto narrows his eyes at him, and then rolls them, with a huff. “Yeah, well, I won’t, thank you very much.” He points a finger at Sasuke. “Next time we get attacked, I’ll contain the enemy, and you will transport us somewhere else.” He shrugs. “Simple.”

Kakashi hums. Right. Simple.

He sighs. “Alright, no talks about attacks today.” He shoots Naruto a look. “Let’s not jinx it.”

Naruto waggles his eyebrows. “But it would still be baa-chan’s responsibility?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Who would then leave the three of us at home, right.”

Sasuke pipes up behind them. “Yes, teme, let’s not jinx it.” He hesitates, and then adds, softly. “Sensei Yamato and Yugao-san have earned this.”

 

Kakashi exhales, warmth spreading through his very core at the realization that Sasuke has taken to calling Tenzou by his title as well, almost a miracle given the fact that he sometimes calls Kakashi Sensei now, too. Not often, but… sometimes. He smirks, softly.

 

 Naruto sighs now, loudly, drawing Kakashi’s attention back to him.  “I know, I know. And I’m not jinxing it.” He shrugs. “I’m just saying that if push should indeed come to shove, we would take care of it, and Kakashi could finish the ceremony with baa-chan.”

Kakashi frowns, watching Naruto shrug.

He clicks his tongue, without a smile. “Naruto, don’t be so cocky. There’s always bigger fish.” Always lessons in humility to be learned.

Naruto looks back at him, stubbornly. “Sasuke and I have Rikkudo Sennin’s powers, Kaguya is working with the technology department. Shikaku and Shikamaru have been working on strategies ever since the war. Ino has taken over the intelligence defense quarters, so Inoichi can revamp it while it’s running.” A hard expression enters his features. “We’ll be fine.”

Kakashi exhales, opening his mouth to respond, but Sasuke is faster.

Sasuke’s voice is hard, a warning laced under it. “Now you are being cocky. We are literally talking about aliens that might arrive at any time. Kaguya was only relatively easy to defeat because we had Obito to contain her in a place she couldn’t control, and because she had split her very will off into that black thing.” He clicks his tongue. “If and when they come, we better pray we have a similar setup.”

Naruto frowns, with a pinched pout. Reiterating. “We’ll manage.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Still. Sasuke’s points are valid.” He sighs, and then decides to lighten the mood again somewhat. There’s nothing we can do about it at this instance anyways, we should just try to enjoy today. “I guess we’ll train then, even harder, hmm?”

Naruto blinks up to him and Kakashi smirks softly, reaching out to draw his fingers over his lapel. “Maaahh, maah, don’t look at me like that. No pain, no gain.”

Naruto snorts, with a quick shake of his head, and Kakashi grins, reaching up to place his hand onto Naruto’s neck, stroking the skin for a moment. “It will be our literal job to see it like Sasuke, Naruto, don’t forget that.” Naruto opens his mouth, but Kakashi lifts his finger, silencing him. “But - I also think that we’ll find a way to manage… if we work together.” He turns his head to look at Sasuke, watching the purple eyes lock onto his. And in any case we have a few years still at last… enough time to shape the future, and to create this light-haired child that Jiraiya saw in his dreams. He sighs, and then nods, stepping back. “So. Sensei Yamato and his bride, today.”

 

Sasuke pushes himself up, with a grunt. “Speech prepared?”

Kakashi pats his pocket, feeling the slip of paper in it. “Yes.”

Naruto starts vibrating again. “Oh, this is so exciting.”

Sasuke blinks at him, and then turns to Kakashi, with a grin that speaks volumes. “Hey Kakashi, you do realize how your wedding day will be, right?”

Naruto chuckles, deeply, throatily, and Kakashi grunts, carefully giving that thought not too much room. “Yeah… that thought has crossed my mind.”

Sasuke grins more broadly, teeth flashing for a moment. “He’s going to be a real menace then.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, but keeps his tone light, with an effort. “Will I… be able to count on you then?”

Sasuke quirks an eyebrow, the smile dying on his lips, in slow motion. He looks away for a moment, and then nods, silently. 

Kakashi swallows, and then whispers in the sudden somber moment. “Thank you.”

He looks over to Naruto, whose gaze is riveted to Sasuke, and who bleeds pain. 

He clears his throat, deflecting with an effort. “But honestly, that won’t happen until you’re settled as well, and you know it, so who knows…”

Naruto’s eyes snap to him, and there’s just an iota of fake levity in his voice, most of the excitement quite real. “Double wedding!!”

Kakashi blinks, and then shoots a very poignant look at Sasuke, who snorts. 

And then swallows, silently. 

 

Kakashi works his jaw for a moment, and then steps back, towards the door. “Are we ready?”

Sasuke’s voice comes on a sniff. “As ready as we’ll ever be.”

 

Kakashi exhales, and then rolls his shoulders, once. “Alright then.”

Naruto waggles his eyebrows, with a grin.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

It’s no surprise that Naruto’s eyes find his, when Tenzou bends to kiss Yugao.

 

Or that Sasuke’s eyes find his, too, for a split second, before he turns to look at Naruto, who is beaming. 

 

But it is a surprise that watching it feels good.

 

 

Kakashi looks up into the cherry-blossom leaves falling like snowflakes because of the wind that’s picked up, Aiko running around his feet to catch them.

 

And he smiles, beatifically.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He takes three glasses of champagne from the waiter, and then saunters over to Guy and Anko, who both sit in a corner with their wheelchairs.

He offers them their glasses, waits till they take them to toast them. “To you - finally healed again to share these moments with us after defeating the most dangerous foes… thank you both.”

Anko snorts, her dark eyes sparkling, though Kakashi can see the pain in them. “Yeah, well, I for one didn’t have much choice.”

Kakashi frowns, seeing Guy look at her, solemnly and without his usual exuberance.

He clicks his tongue and turns to pull up a chair, settling on it with a sigh. 

And then takes the bull by its horns. “You miss them.” Your snakes.

Anko’s face shutters, her mouth set into a thin line.

Her voice is a hiss. “He ripped them from me, like child’s play. Dying there was not enough for him.”

Kakashi grimaces, sharing a long look with Guy, before sighing again. “Still. You are here now, you defeated him.”

Guy speaks up, gently, though his energy is shining through. “You will be able to leave the chair in a little while, your body a miracle of healing.”

Anko scoffs, and then sniffs, with a shake of her head. “Still. What good can I possibly… be now, now that my jutsus are gone?” She sniffs again, blinking rapidly. “I had this signature skill, and it’s gone.”

Kakashi hums, nodding, and then takes a sip of his champagne before answering. “Losing the sharingan had me lose my ability to use chidori.”

Anko blinks up to him, slowly. Mutely.

Kakashi smirks, painfully. “I’ve been missing it, more than anticipated.” He lifts his glass, points it over to where Sora is standing with Minato and Kushina. “Sora-san pointed out a possible way to… maybe find a way to adapt it, but…” He grimaces, shaking his head. “Right now it’s pretty unusable.”

Guy speaks up, voice low. “Kakashi has been working through his doubts whether his remaining skills will be enough to actually be Hokage.”

Kakashi blinks, and then turns his head, to stare at Guy.  

His tone is flat. “I wasn’t aware I was that transparent.”

Guy grins, teeth flashing. “Only to your friends, my dear rival.”

Kakashi grunts, taking another sip, seeing Anko take a deep swallow as well. “No pointing out the power of my youth?”

Guy raises fist to press it over his heart, tears in his eyes now. “Ah but you know that, don’t you? The power of your youth and love have carried you here, and now that it is all changed it will only need a leap of faith to reach the flowery delights waiting for you in the future!”

Kakashi blinks, and then shares a quick look with Anko, who ducks her head to hide her grin.

He smirks softly, echoing. “The flowery delights?”

Guy grins, giving him a thumbs up with his free hand. “Oh but yes, Kakashi. I saw you smile, earlier. And the culmination of your love will unlock the future, of that I am more than sure, my rival.”

Kakashi hums, and then snorts, with a shake of his head. “Yeah, we’ll see I guess.” He shoots a quick look over at ‘the culmination of his love’, who is currently feeding cake to Sasuke - who in turn looks to be a bit suffering, to the bystanding Itachi and Sakura’s obvious delight. Kakashi turns back with a grin. “Do you want me to get you some cake?”

Anko raises her eyebrows. “No. I’m putting on weight already because I don’t move a lot.”

Kakashi hums, and then shrugs. “Not everyone is gifted with Naruto’s metabolism.”

Anko snorts, and then sends Naruto, who is stuffing cake into his mouth now, a deliberate skunk-eye. “Truer words were never spoken.” She sniffs, and then nods, before locking her eyes with Kakashi once more. “He healed me, you know?” 

Kakashi tilts his head, with a frown, and she continues, her voice carrying the soft smile that tugs at the corners of her mouth now. “He and Sakura-san. He used his powers, while Sakura directed it…” She lifts her hand to look at her wrist. “Golden and green chakra, putting me together.” She clicks her tongue, and then sighs. “He apologized that he couldn’t recreate the snakes, since he had no template.” She shakes her head. “When I remember how he was, back then… you know when I met him first, I thought he was this obnoxious little brat, only caring for himself.”

Kakashi grins, taking another sip. “There’s parts of him that have stayed like that, no worries.” And he is going round healing people with Sakura? Probably analyzing their respective skills?

Anko grins, and then chuckles, with a shake of her head. “Yeah. But still.” She quirks an eyebrow. “He and Sakura discussed their skills so openly and… grown-up… “ She snorts. “It made me feel so old.”

Kakashi snorts, raising his now empty glass to her. “Now that I can understand.”

Anko rolls her eyes. “You’re only two years older than me, get a grip.”

Kakashi chuckles soundlessly, and then shares a look with Guy, who is watching them with a small smile. 

 

He sobers, slowly, and then leans in a bit, emphasizing heavily. “What are your thoughts on him?”

He doesn’t need to specify who, knowing Anko gets it just fine.

She rolls her eyes. “I don’t know. I cannot even be mad. The whole situation is just…” 

She trails off and Kakashi finishes for her, tone dry. “Typical?”

Anko points a finger at him. “Yep. That.”

Kakashi sighs, and then shrugs. “He has always been good at… slithering out of tight spots. Pun intended.”

Anko snorts, with another roll of her eyes. “Yes.” She inhales, deeply, and then blows the air out, her cheeks puffed. “Still. I mean… there is this part of me that misses him.” She swallows. “Despite everything. He was my Sensei, my teacher, I trusted him… and, in his own very shrewd way he never betrayed me.” She snorts, eyes hard for a moment. “He is always true to himself.”

Kakashi frowns, watching the bubbles rise to the surface in the amber liquid. “Do you want to ask him to…”

Anko interjects, immediately. “No. And I don’t want to see him on a daily basis, so please put him in a base a ways off.” She shares a long look with Kakashi, and then clicks her tongue, pointing vaguely with glass in hand. “I’ll be a good girl and be the living example of forgiving the enemy, but please keep him out of Konoha for the most part.”

Kakashi snorts, and then nods, lifting his glass in an quick toast. “I think we can do that.”

 

There is a bit of a pause as they all just watch the crowd, each dwelling on their own thoughts.

Kakashi breaks it, eventually. “Have you thought about what you want to do now?”

Anko clears her throat, lowering her gaze to flip at a non-existent fluff on her pants. “I have talked to Iruka. He came to visit me in the hospital a few times… he suggested I could become a teacher?”

Kakashi hums. “And?”

Anko tilts her head back a bit, with a groan, while sharing a long look with Guy, who gives her a thumbs-up and a broad smile. “I…” She reaches up to rub a hand over her face with her free hand, and then shakes her head. “I know you know…” She trails off, shooting a meaningful look at Kakashi, who nods, once. She sighs, continuing. “Iruka is one of the best out there, no matter the level of… engagement.” She clears her throat, with the faintest blush. “I can imagine working with him.”

Kakashi smirks, softly. “That’s good?”

Anko rolls her eyes. “Yeah, well.”

Guy speaks up, one hand pressed to his chest. “To imagine the powers of your youth transferred to the children of our village and them bathing in the sunshine of your soul makes me so happy?”

Anko smiles, just the tiniest bit wobbly, before raising her glass and emptying it, silently.

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Another one?”

Anko shakes her head, handing him the empty glass. “No, it’s okay.” She shoots a look at Guy who grins at her. “I think we’ll switch to something stronger, won’t we?”

Guy’s grin broadens and Kakashi snorts, with the tiniest bow. “I see. Well then, please excuse me, I need to be sober enough to make my rounds.”

 

He turns away, only to hear Anko call after him. “You know that they’ve already started on your stone head, don’t you, Kakashi?”

Kakashi sighs, deeply, loudly. “I know.”

He steps over to Iruka and Obito, followed by her snicker, and pulled in by twin dark gazes that are filled with humor. 

Iruka clicks his tongue, tone amused. “She’s right, you know.”

Kakashi grunts, turning his gaze to Obito. “Want to pour salt into the wound, too?”

Obito raises his glass, hiding his smirk behind it before answering. “Not really.”

Kakashi sighs, leaning in, heavily emphasizing. “Thank you.”

Obito grins, eyes crinkling.

Iruka clicks his tongue. “Why are you putting it off?”

Kakashi groans, letting his head fall back. “I don’t know…” He shakes his head. “It just… doesn’t feel right?”

Iruka frowns. “But does it ever?”

Kakashi opens his mouth, eyes unseeing on the ceiling, and then shrugs. “I don’t know?”

 

Minato’s soft voice interrupts, filled with affection and something dark, something that Kakashi cannot name. “It doesn’t, no.”

Kakashi tilts his head to look at him, tone suffused with sarcasm. “Great.”

Minato chuckles, sharing a quick look with Obito and then clicking his tongue. “It’s something you have to grow into.”

Kakashi grimaces. “I cannot use chidori. I cannot use my sharingan. I am not the man I was pre-war.”

Minato tilts his head. “None of that matters though?”

Kakashi scoffs.

Minato narrows his eyes. “Besides, didn’t that Guren arrive the other day? I heard Naruto say that he met up with her adoptive son, Yuuki..maru if I remember correctly?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, but nods. “Yes, but it will take time to find out if I can actually adapt her skills to refine mine.” He clicks his tongue. “And I’m…” Unwilling to trigger any more emotional trauma just to trigger the stupid eyes. 

He turns to put the empty glasses he carries away, reaching for another. “I’m not sure whether reactivating the sharingan will actually be possible. Which makes me far from one of the strongest shinobi, even if you discount current Team 7.” He swallows, letting his gaze glide around the room. “In fact, I’m probably weaker than a lot of the ninjas here.” He lets his gaze linger on Temari, who is standing next to a seemingly nervous Shikamaru. “Or kunoichis.”

 

There is a short pause, and then Minato sighs, shaking his head. “Be that as it may, Kaka-kun, but I still believe that you are the one who is the best person for this job.”

Kakashi works his jaw for a moment, looking down in to his glass.

Obito clicks his tongue. “Your and Naruto’s super powers have never been your actual strengths though, Kakashi… it’s your hearts.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes.

Minato smirks. “I agree.”

Iruka smirks, too, pointing a finger. “Listen to them. You are the one we need now. And your soul-mate will literally power us into the future.”

Kakashi sighs soundlessly into his glass, before taking a sip. “That he will.”

Minato’s grin widens. “I cannot wait to see it.”

Kakashi blinks, raising his eyes to his. He takes another sip, the thought bleak. But in order to see it, you and Kushina would need to be here still. So that means… 

He clears his throat. “Yeah well, guess I have my work cut out for me.” He looks away, gaze locking with Shikamaru’s for a split second. He looks back at Minato and Iruka and Obito. “Excuse me.”

 

He doesn’t wait for their response, starting to saunter over to Shikamaru, who steps back from Temari with a quick touch to the small of her back, a touch that speaks volumes.

Kakashi smirks to himself, softly. 

Shikamaru steps up to him, with a quick nod. “Rokudaime.”

Kakashi grunts. “Stop it… not there yet.”

Shikamaru grins, for just a moment. “Still.” He sobers, and then lowers his voice. “I wanted to talk to you.” He frowns, looking away for a second. “Temari and I…” He hesitates, and then groans, with a roll of his eyes. “Ah, this is so annoying.” He straightens up, his eyes finding Kakashi’s, the words pressed out. “Temari and I want to explore our relationship further. We… know it’s soon, but…” He clears his throat. “And we do not want to do tattoos.” He quirks an eyebrow. “Given the sensitivity of our union we wanted to check whether that was alright with you though.”

Kakashi blinks, opening his mouth and then snapping it shut again, his mind a static.

He finally asks, though he knows the answer already. “You don’t want the confirmation?”

Shikamaru frowns, darkly. “No.”

Kakashi exhales through his nose, watching the emotions flit over Shikamaru’s face. “Free will and all that?” Shikamaru grimaces, and Kakashi hums, with a click of his tongue. “I understand.” He locks his gaze with Shikamaru, emphasizing heavily. “I do.” He looks over to Temari, who is talking to Kushina and Sora right now. “She is a good fit for you.” He smirks, giving Shikamaru an eye-smile. “Head-strong. Smart. Beautiful. Strong.” He lifts his chin. “What does Gaara say to this? Or Kankuro?”

Shikamaru snorts. “Gaara said he’d have to come by regularly then.”

Kakashi grins, with a nod. “I see.” He toasts Shikamaru. “Just wait till you have kids. Uncle Gaara will be here aaaaallll the time.”

Shikamaru ducks his head, blushing a bit. “Yeah well. That may be a ways off still. I mean…”

Kakashi grunts. “Oh I hope so. Live a little for heaven’s sake.”

Shikamaru snorts again. “We plan to.” He swallows. “So, no objections?”

Kakashi snorts, too. “Against you two strengthening the ties between Konohagakure and Sunagakure singlehandedly? Against you choosing your feelings over some kind of weird chakra-infused proof?” He clicks his tongue. “Against you bringing another powerhouse and exquisite role model to our very doorstep?” He smirks. “Nope.”

Shikamaru blushes, just a bit. “Okay.” He clears his throat, and lifts his glass, mumbling into it. “Now I only have to tell my Dad.”

Kakashi grins, lifting his own. “He’ll love it.”

Shikamaru quirks an eyebrow, and then clears his throat. “I hope.”

Kakashi chuckles. “What the hell are you afraid of there, Shikamaru, hmm?” He tilts his head, pointing towards Temari. “It’s her.”

Shikamaru grins, ducking his head. “Right.” He sighs, and then shoots a sly look at Kakashi. “I bet you’ve been terrified though, too.”

Kakashi grunts, shivering for effect. “Frozen solid.” He chuckles with Shikamaru and then sobers, with a bit of  a wistful smile. “Seriously though, I… was afraid.” He swallows. “But I think we all only want those we love happy.”

Shikamaru quirks an eyebrow, and then looks over to Kurenai, who is talking with Yugao right now. “Yeah, we do.”

Kakashi follows his gaze, his voice low. “I still have to talk to her. But she knows what I want to say and she doesn’t want to hear it.”

Shikamaru snorts, tone dry. “Yeah, I bet.” He sobers, with a sigh. “But Mirai does her good. I think she’s…” 

He hesitates, and Kakashi continues, after a moment. “Adapting?”

Shikamaru lifts his eyebrows. “Yes. Which is its own way of accepting it, isn’t it.”

Kakashi nods, shooting another look at Kurenai, who laughs with Yugao right now. “One that probably will take a bit longer, but…”

 

Shikamaru waggles his eyebrows. “Which brings us back to our initial subject… why does it take so long for you to accept the darn hat?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, not quite in the mood to rehash the discussion he had with Minato, Obito and Iruka. “Well, everything else in my life is taking a long time, too?”

Shikamaru blinks at him, and then tilts his head, with a smirk. “Fair point.”

Kakashi exhales, quietly.

Shikamaru leans in a bit, nodding to the other side, where Naruto, Sasuke, Neji and Karin are standing. “Honestly, I never expected to see that setup.”

Kakashi sighs, and then shrugs. “The Neji-Karin-thing? Nope. But Naruto and Sasuke have been kind of inevitable since the beginning.”

Shikamaru hums. “Do you think Sasuke’s soul-mate is here somewhere?”

Kakashi sighs, deeply. “Considering he has been around for a while now…” 

Shikamaru sighs, too. “You don’t think his soul-mate is in Konoha.”

Kakashi swallows, looking down at his feet. “I doubt it. There have been enough events, and they’ve been to the academy, and tower, and…” He trails off.

Shikamaru grimaces. “Shit.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, partly at himself. “Yeah, well.”

They both watch the little group off to the side for a moment, watch as Naruto lifts his eyes to Kakashi’s for a long moment, before looking away again.

Kakashi’s heart beats hard, for a moment.

Shikamaru clicks his tongue. “And yet... That can’t take forever anymore either.”

Kakashi swallows, his mouth dry. “No. But he’s still so young, I…”

Shikamaru groans. “Kakashi, seriously.” He turns his head back to Kakashi, waits until Kakashi locks their gazes. “Why is age of majority at 17 already?” He tilts his head, not waiting for an answers. “Because shinobis die, often early. Because we enter the fucking fray at friggin’ twelve years old, and we are far from innocent.” He gesticulates, a bit wildly. “I’m not saying your restraint isn’t exemplary, but seriously, Kakashi, let us live.” Shikamaru lifts his eyebrows. “And you, you live, too.”

Kakashi growls at him, playfully. “Now you sound like him.”

Shikamaru snorts. “Naruto has always known what he wants Kakashi. And he’s never wavered, doggedly fighting to get it, too. Why do you doubt him in this?”

Kakashi pulls a face. “Probably because I know that things change over the years? That one grows still, and is far from adult, with 18?”

Shikamaru nods, with a hum. Lifting his glass to point it. “And yet you accept it for me and Temari, or for Itachi and Sakura, for Neji and Karin. For Hinata and Tenten.” He narrows his eyes. “Why is that?”

Kakashi snarls, behind his mask. “I am fourteen years older, Shikamaru. 14. That’s not a trifle.”

Shikamaru rolls his eyes, tone bitingly sarcastic. “Oh, the disadvantage to be able to counterbalance Naruto’s enthusiasm with experience and wisdom.”

Kakashi grimaces and glowers at him.

Shikamaru leans in, eyes narrowed. “Has it never occurred to you that that is part of it?”

Kakashi blinks, with a frown. “What?”

Shikamaru shakes his head, tone vaguely exhausted. “Your bond. Has it never occurred to you that you match so perfectly because you balance the other out?” He licks his lips, raising his eyebrows. “Naruto is an untamable powerhouse, save for his heart. You are, forgive me, or at least can be a killer, save for your heart. Naruto is naive, sometimes, shying away from the harsh decisions, while you face them, head-on, even if they tear you apart. He is gold, you are silver. You represent the old ways, he represents the new.” Shikamaru waggles his eyebrows, tone acerbic. “Do I need to go on.”

Kakashi pulls a face, unable to suppress the sullen undertone. “No.”

Shikamaru takes a sip of his drink, his dark eyes sly. “Good.”

 

Naruto pipes up, sending a shiver down Kakashi’s spine. “Glad you approve, Shika.”

Shikamaru quirks an eyebrow, keeping his eyes on Kakashi’s. “If only our future Hokage would believe me.”

Kakashi grunts. 

Naruto hums, stepping up to them, hands in his pockets. “He will. Trust me.”

Kakashi turns to him, watching the defiant expression on Naruto’s face. “What does Sasuke say to that?”

Naruto grimaces, looking away for a second. And then he shrugs. “He knows the truth of it.” He leans in a bit, emphasizing the words. “As you know.” He raises one eyebrow, and then leans back again, with a sigh. “He wants to join the trip to Uzushiogakure that Karin and Neji are planning. I said I’d come along with Mom and Dad, too.” Naruto’s blue eyes are wide on Kakashi’s. “Will you come as well?”

Kakashi frowns. “When do you plan to go?”

Naruto clicks his tongue. “Sometime after the inauguration? Or after the academy year?”

Kakashi cackles, taking a sip.

Naruto rolls his eyes. “You cannot put it off forever, you know.”

Kakashi grins. “I can try.”

Naruto grins, too, shaking his head. “Baka.”

Shikamaru interjects, nodding to himself. “I see we’re already at the pet-names-stage.”

Naruto’s head whips around, and he blushes, wildly. “I… no, I mean…” 

Kakashi raises his eyebrows in mock-hurt and Naruto rolls his eyes, with a loud groan. “Ok, fine, yes, we are. I guess.” He narrows his eyes at Kakashi. “Do you have one for me as well?”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, tone dripping with amusement. “I guess ‘brat’ is somewhere way up there… followed by ‘imp’.” 

Naruto glowers at him, silently. Shikamaru cackles into his glass.

Kakashi grins through the glower, and then clicks his tongue, with a shrug. “If it helps, you’re also my sun, right?”

Naruto blinks, and then his gaze softens, vulnerability bleeding through. 

His voice is almost inaudible over the buzz of the room. “I remember.”

Shikamaru clears his throat, very quietly. “You really should go and make-out in a dark corner of the room. The air between you is stifling.” Both Kakashi and Naruto turn to him, their somewhat wild gazes matching. 

Shikamaru grins fiendishly. “What?” He nods at Naruto. “What does Kurama say to that?”

Naruto colors, spectacularly, and then mumbles, softly. “He’s actually growling at me to get a move on.”

Shikamaru lifts his glass, tone dry. “See?”

Kakashi hums, and then reaches out to rub over Naruto’s back. “Shikamaru, Naruto is no cheat.” He smirks softly, tilting his head to catch Naruto’s gaze. “We’ll get there.”

Naruto’s gaze is blue fire, burning through him. “We will.”

Kakashi swallows, his throat suddenly beyond dry. Echoing. “We will.”

 

Shikamaru huffs a laugh, and then shakes his head, and then he leans in, his dark eyes on Kakashi’s. “Soon-to-be Hokage-sama, remember my words.” He grins. “And know that I’ll happily cover for you when the time comes.”

Naruto snorts, and then starts to laugh, loudly, while Kakashi shakes his head, trying to admonish Shikamaru with a look, and failing by a mile, if the broad grin that Shikamaru is sporting is any indication. 

Shikamaru lifts his glass in a silent toast, and then saunters back over to Temari, re-entering the discussion with Kushina and Sora silently, with another little touch to the small of her back.

 

Naruto watches him go, silently, the air between them heavy suddenly, drenched in anticipation and possibilities and… fantasy. 

Kakashi clears his throat. “So. Where’s Sasuke?”

Naruto inhales, deeply. “Outside, with Itachi and Sakura.” He blinks and then shoots Kakashi a look. “So. Wanna go and dance with me?”

“Ahhhh….” Kakashi blinks, mind a flatline. He swallows, tries to collect his thoughts, while watching a few other couples sway a ways off. “Do you think that’s wise.”

Naruto smirks, a bit sadly, and then shrugs. “No. But I want to do it anyways.”

His eyes find Kakashi’s for a long moment, the thrum between them almost hot. 

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, with a shake of his head. “Don’t look at me that way.”

Naruto’s small grin can be heard in his voice. “What way.”

Kakashi grunts. “That way.” He reopens his eyes to see Naruto grin at him now, eyes sparkling. 

He leans in a bit. “You can make me stop looking if you dance with me. I’ll close my eyes?”

Kakashi harrumphs, and then sighs, noting the song has changed, to something just the tiniest bit faster.

Naruto threads his fingers through his. “Oh come on.”

Kakashi groans, throwing his head back a bit. “Fiiiiiinnnne.” He lets Naruto tug him along, slowly. “For the record though, I don’t think this is a good idea.”

Naruto sticks his tongue out for a moment, and then echoes his tone, just a bit over the top. “For the record though, I think this is a splendid idea.”

They reach the little space that serves as a dancing area, and Naruto turns to Kakashi, letting his hand go to take the glass from Kakashi, and putting it carelessly onto a table off to the side.

And then he hooks his arms around Kakashi’s neck, stepping close. 

Kakashi shivers. 

 

And then places his hand on the small of Naruto’s back, the other one on Naruto’s waist.

Naruto lowers his head, their noses touching for a moment. He whispers. "Stop thinking, Kakashi.“

Kakashi blinks, eyes unfocused on blue.

Naruto starts to sway, just a bit.

 

Kakashi exhales. 

 

Reality drops away, a weird backdrop to the only thing that matters.

Naruto smiles, beatifically, for just a moment. 

Kakashi sighs, words almost inaudible. "What will Sasuke say?“

Naruto shrugs, just a bit. "That we‘re beautiful?“

Kakashi’s throat clicks as he swallows. 

 

Naruto blinks, very slowly, the golden lashes tickling Kakashi’s skin. 

He breathes the words. "Reach for me.“

Kakashi closes his eyes, breathing in, deeply, and opening himself, unable to deny this request, unable not to. 

The thrum is immediate this time, almost vicious, shivering through them both, with breathtaking intensity. 

Naruto gasps quietly, his forehead coming forward to lean against Kakashi’s, another smile stealing across his face. It’s difficult to breathe, the air heavy. 

He licks his lips, voice faraway. "It’s almost ecstatic, isn’t it.“

Kakashi works his jaw for a moment, his voice scratchy. "And the need to touch intensifies every time.“ Having you so near is terribly addictive. 

Naruto hums, pressing just a bit closer, seemingly hearing his thoughts. 

He giggles. "Think we‘ll pass out when we have sex the first time?“

Kakashi snorts, loudly, and then cackles, the air between them light again, instantly, sparkling. 

He grins, leaning back a bit to lock his gaze with Naruto’s. "Only if you ask nicely.“

Naruto waggles his eyebrows. "Oh?“ He bites the tip of his tongue. "Learned a lot in the Anbu?“

Kakashi smirks, and the leans in, letting his clothed mouth hover over Naruto’s lips for a long moment before withdrawing again, thoroughly enjoying Naruto’s shortened breath and dark eyes. "A lot. Yes.“

Naruto swallows, noisily. "Can’t wait.“

 

Kakashi opens his mouth to respond, only to get interrupted by a loud voice, that carries a lot of annoyance. And amusement. 

"Oh for heaven’s sake, do kiss him already?“

Kakashi freezes for a split second, and then turns round, to face Mei, the moment he has to let go of Naruto‘s body another thrum, pulling. 

He clears his throat, ignoring the chuckles and whispers all around, while trying to keep his blush in check. It’s not exactly helping that Naruto is still clinging to him, just tapered to his back now, chin pressing into Kakashi’s shoulder. 

"Mei-sama. I wasn’t aware that you were at this wedding, too.“

Mei saunters up to them, grinning, one hand on her hip. "Well as you know I was visiting for the cultural exchange program, and I love weddings. I asked if I could come, too.“ She shoots a look at Yugao and Tenzou, who are off to the side with champagne in hand and… grinning.

Kakashi sends Tenzou a little skunk-eye while Mei laughs.

“Now, now, Kakashi-sama, do not be furious at your friend.” Mei reaches up to twirl a long lock of her hair around her finger. “But it is such an interesting thing to see this develop between you. Such an interesting bond.”

Kakashi grunts, feeling Naruto shift a bit. “A very personal bond.”

Mei’s eyes narrow with something Kakashi would almost label as affection. “Bonds are always personal, are they not. And yet you chose to… wallow in it here.” She clicks her tongue, with a grin now. “So don’t be furious at us for sharing your excitement…”

Kakashi works his jaw for a moment, and then sighs, with a nod. “You are right, we put on a public display. That won’t happen again.”

A chorus of instant ‘nooooo’s rises up, not the least echoed by Naruto, who steps back from him and around, the blue eyes glowering. “What the hell, Kakashi. I’m not going to hide what we have? What we are?”

Kakashi blinks, and then backpedals a bit, with a grimace. “That is not what I meant. But, I mean, we’re not actively…”

Naruto interjects, heatedly. “What exactly do you mean actively. Was dancing not an action?”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, resisting the action to tap his foot. “Naruto, I believe you know very well what I mean, I…”

Naruto’s voice is acerbic. “Do I?”

Kakashi narrows his eyes.

 

It’s Minato’s voice that interjects, the words calm, but underlaid with warning. “Naruto, enough.”

Naruto steps back a bit, crossing his arms. Silently. The whiskers quiver.

Minato steps up to him, reaching up to place his hand on Naruto’s neck after a moment. 

He clicks his tongue. “Easy.” Minato’s eyes crinkle, but his voice stays the same, in a tone that Kakashi remembers. “You cannot have it all. Stop pushing while not giving.”

Naruto looks away, sullenly. 

Beyond him, Kakashi’s eyes catch Kushina’s dark gaze for a moment.

The room is quiet, despite the music playing on, but Kakashi is extremely uncomfortably aware that everyone is watching. 

Minato raises his chin a bit, and an eyebrow. “Why don’t you go and find Sasuke and Itachi and Sakura, and stop making demands, Naruto.”

Kakashi can see Naruto’s jaw work for a moment, and there is this pause, where he thinks Naruto might lash out, but he deflates instead, with a curt nod.

Minato’s thumb strokes for a second before he lets go. “Good.” His eyes find Kakashi’s, before turning to Mei. “I believe we didn’t have the joy on the battlefield?”

 

Mei blinks, and then smiles, broadly, while bowing her head. “Indeed. It is a pleasure to meet you, Yondaime.”

Minato inclines his head, and then extends his arm, towards Kushina. “May I offer you a drink with me and my wife? It has been a while since I have heard stories from Kirigakure.”

Mei turns a bit, starting towards Kushina. “Absolutely.”

Minato nods, and then shoots a very poignant look at Kakashi, before following her. 

 

Kakashi reaches up, to rub his temple. 

The muscles in Naruto’s jaw jump. 

Kakashi sighs, deeply. “Maah, I really miss the cute little genins sometimes.”

Naruto snorts, tone dark, while his gaze flits around the room, defiantly. “Not that much backtalk?”

It’s Kakashi’s turn to snort, and he does so while bumping into Naruto’s shoulder, gently. “As if you would have ever not backtalked.”

Naruto ducks his head a bit, clicking his tongue, but the air between them lifts a bit, gets easier. The room takes up a low buzz again, as people start talking once more, and Kakashi is just glad, though he is also aware that they are likely talking about them, but right now he is just glad that the center of attention shifts. 

He hesitates a moment, wondering why Naruto does not, actually, follows Minatos suggestion, and then nods at the entrance. “Walk?”

Naruto nods, too, and then starts walking towards it, with Kakashi following in his wake, shooting a quick look at Yugao, who grins and nods at the door, and he ducks his head, in thanks.

 

Outside Naruto stops, lifting his head to the late afternoon sky, breathing in deeply. 

His voice sounds faraway. “I think I was so upset because I really, really wanted us to kiss then, too.”

Kakashi snorts, and then starts to walk, slowly, feeling Naruto fall into step with him after a moment. 

He clicks his tongue. “Yeah, well, I know what you mean.”

Naruto groans, and then sighs. “That’s why you said it wasn’t a good idea.”

Kakashi shoots him a look. “Very clever.” Naruto rolls his eyes. Kakashi grins a bit to himself, and then sighs, too, with a shrug. “It’s only going to get harder to resist… I…”, he hesitates, looking at Naruto, who gazes back almost solemnly, “I mean we both want this, eventually, right?” Naruto nods, mutely, and Kakashi continues after a moment, his gut fluttering. “And refusing it, or even refusing aspects of it really, really grates.”

Naruto is silent for long minutes, and Kakashi turns his feet towards the gate, pulled towards the open space beyond. He nods at the guards.

 

Naruto speaks up again, eventually, feet kicking up a bit of dust deliberately. “I know we talked about time, and that I have to grow still… and there’s Sasuke of course.” He swallows, and Kakashi just breathes, waits. Naruto shrugs. “I feel guilty, but I also…”, he sniffs, and then laughs, with another shrug. “Our thunder is addictive.”

Kakashi smirks, softly, repeating his earlier thought. “Having you near is terribly addictive.”

Naruto swallows, noisily. “Yeah.” He hesitates, and then points to the little path down to the settlements, where Kakashi’s old house is at. “I really loved that you took me to your home back then.” He hesitates. “Have you been by, lately?”

Kakashi shakes his head, and then walks past, deliberately. “No. And it wouldn’t be a good idea now either.” 

Naruto quirks an eyebrow and then walks with him some more, silently. 

 

Eventually Kakashi speaks up again. “I know you also reacted that way because you still were a bit pissed at Mei for her… flirting at the conference.”

Naruto clears his throat. “Yeah, well…”

Kakashi grins a bit. “She’s a very good match, for any shinobi.”

Naruto pulls a face, looking away. 

His tone is carefully neutral. “But she’s not your type?”

Kakashi frowns, shooting him a somewhat amused look. “My type?”

Naruto rolls his eyes, and then crosses his arms, with a huff. “Yeah, well, you know. Sensei Iruka, that spy back then, and, in a way, Obito and your other team-mate back then, Rin if I remember correctly?” He shoots Kakashi a look. “I saw a photo the other day. Dark brown hair and big, dark eyes… that seems to be something you like?”

Kakashi stops on the street, narrowing his eyes. “What… are you implying.”

Naruto turns to him, shaking his head with a grimace. “I’m an outlier to your preferences. Is that why you are able to resist it? All the others that have found their bonds haven’t been able to, and I…” He trails off.

Kakashi stares at him, nonplussed.

And then he steps in, fighting hard to keep the humor from his voice, knowing that Naruto would only be ticked off by it. “And how, Naruto, does Sensei Jiraiya fit into this?” He tilts his head, leaning in even more. “Since it was you who so publicly insinuated there on the battlefield, how does he fit into it?”

Naruto shifts, clearing his throat. With a blush. 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, willing the amusement away. “Naruto, I like people. Not genders, or types. People. Always have, always will.” He narrows his eyes. “I actually thought this was something we shared.”

Naruto grimaces, and then looks away for a moment, and then down at his feet. “Yeah, well, I mean, I guess…”

“Mhh hmmm.” Kakashi nods, very glad to be able to hide his grin behind his mask, though he knows Naruto can see it nonetheless. 

Naruto sniffs. “Konohamaru says you once spent a night with Kurenai and Asuma.”

Kakashi blinks, very slowly, and then shrugs, while willing a blush of his own down. “That’s… true.” However did he get that information though.

Naruto blinks at him. “Your second threesome…” He narrows his eyes. “Or did you have more?”

Kakashi snorts, and then reaches up to draw his hand over his face. “Nooooo….. Just those two.”

Naruto harrumphs.

Kakashi starts to chuckle, under his breath. “This bothers you?”

Naruto pushes his jaw forward, eyes narrowed. “We’ve already established that, haven’t we.”

Kakashi hums, with a nod. “Why does that bother you though, and my kiss with your father, and not my connection to Iruka and Obito?”

Naruto blinks, looking away. “I… guess… I mean, they’ve always been there?” He shrugs. “Those connections of yours with them? Right?”

Kakashi tilts his head, voice soft. “Just like your connection to Sasuke… though it’s been hard to watch nonetheless.”

Naruto grimaces. “There is this big part of me that doesn’t want to see you with anyone else.” He swallows. “It’s gnawing at me.”

Kakashi swallows, too, a shiver in his gut. 

He whispers. “I can empathize.”

Naruto swallows again, noisily. “How do you cope?” He snorts, and then shakes his head, with a pinched expression. “I mean, I know we have talked about this, but…”

Kakashi hums, with a shake of his head. “No, you’re right.” He turns a bit, and starts walking again, waiting until Naruto catches up once more. “Sensei Jiraiya told me once, long ago, that I wouldn’t need to stay celibate until the bond engaged. I have… let other loves find me.” He raises his eyebrows. “At times, I would have preferred them.”

Naruto nods. “Like Sensei Iruka.”

Kakashi sighs, deciding to be blunt. “Yes.” He grimaces. “Though, given what we know now, it would have been a terrible mess if and when Obito would have crossed his path… if Kaguya can be trusted, that seems to be a given.” He shrugs. “For whatever reason.”

Naruto nods, slowly. “Yeah. She said we were a given, too.”

Kakashi nods. “Yes, and those sharing our lives feel it, too.” He quirks an eyebrow. “Can you believe it, when you stepped up to us earlier, Shikamaru told me that I’m… keeping double standards.”

Naruto shoots him a look, frowning. “In regards to me?”

Kakashi hums. “And the other bonded couples, yes.” He frowns, staring unseeing at the road, allowing the thought. “I mean, he does have a point, but a gap like ours still eradicates a lot of agency…”

Naruto mulls on that for a moment, voice carefully poised. “You said that before. And yet, seeing my Dad now… He and Mom got married when they were 19.”

Kakashi nods, with a sigh through his nose. “I know.” He bites his tongue, stopping himself from pointing out that there was a big ninja war around the corner then, and people just tried to live a bit. And that Minato had known he was living on borrowed time.

But Shikamaru is right. Shinobis die, often early. That argument doesn’t really hold. 

Naruto grimaces. “I…” His voice drops to a whisper. “I would love for Sasuke to find his soul-mate before I…” He trails off.

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, and then nods, trying to keep his voice light. “Maybe… we could ask Kaguya?”

Naruto grimaces. “He doesn’t want to.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “This isn’t easy for him either.”

Kakashi lifts his eyebrows. “No. It’s not.” He frowns. “You know his soul-mate is likely not in the village, don’t you.”

Naruto presses his lips together, and then nods, a bit wildly. 

His voice is wobbly. “I know. And part of me is glad of it, while the other…” He swallows. “It is why I want us to take that trip to the villages, too, you know. I want…”

Kakashi sighs. “And of course he is aware of that also.”

Naruto grimaces. “He’s been…”, he hesitates, and then adds, “difficult.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. I bet. “Well, it is difficult.”

 

They fall silent, each dwelling on their own thoughts, the setting sun sending long shadows over the golden-tinged landscape. 

Kakashi changes the subject after a moment, shooting Naruto a look. “You’ll start teaching at the academy in summer for a year, and then will do your Jonin exam… How do you feel about leading a genin team?”

A slow smile spreads over Naruto’s face. “Excited. Teaching will be a challenge, too.” He cackles. “I remember the time so vividly.” He sobers, slowly, licking his lips. “The not so good parts, too.”

Kakashi hums, watching the sun set, his body full of warm tingles. “The swing is still there.”

Naruto smiles, a bit wobbly. “I know.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “I sometimes go by that spot on the river, too. Remembering us fishing.”

Kakashi smirks softly, remembering a little boy falling asleep while fishing. “Yeah, me too.”

Naruto swallows. “Dad says we should get a room at the tower. Be close, beyond the work.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long m moment. “We probably shouldn’t… dance there though.”

Naruto cackles, loudly. “No.” He sniffs, and then shoots Kakashi a sideways look. “Especially after what we talked about.”

Kakashi’s tone is dry. “Yeah, we probably should stop talking about it for a while, too.”

Naruto chuckles, under his breath, tone sly. “Still not using any of the… fantasies?”

Kakashi shoots him a skunk-eye. “No more than you?”

Naruto grins, fiendishly. “I see.”

 

For a moment there is a pulse between them, like a heartbeat, echoing the thrum.

 

Kakashi clears his throat. “We should probably return.”

Naruto pulls a face. “Yeah…” He hesitates, and then shrugs. “We could also just sit there, on the grass, and watch the stars come up?”

Kakashi blinks, and then snorts. “Not inclined to go back to the party?”

Naruto grimaces, and then leans in a bit. “My Dad very nearly ripped me a new one in front of everybody. Can you imagine what Mom will do when she catches me?”

Kakashi laughs out, loudly, and then closes his eyes chuckling. “True.” He shakes his head, still laughing. “Me and Obito really got a lot of that attention when we were younger. She can be quite scary.” He sniffs, and then looks up at the darkening sky, and the grassy and colorful greenery all around. “Alright… Lie with me in a field of flowers?” He blinks, and then adds, on a whim. “Spring has finally arrived after all.” 

Naruto smirks at him, softly. “Spring blossoms everywhere.”

 

Kakashi’s heart beats hard, once, watching Naruto’s pupils dilate, draw him in. “Yes.”

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 49: Responsibilities in the frozen sky

Notes:

The chapter title is a play on the Kakashi Hiden novel: “Lightning in the Icy Sky”, which is one of the supposedly canon novels. While the story itself isn’t toooooo interesting imho (https://naruto.fandom.com/wiki/Kakashi_Hiden:_Lightning_in_the_Icy_Sky), the emotional impacts and hinted-at ties and reactions are even more so. I’m changing it just slightly, to add more ties to it for Kakashi. And obviously it has been adapted to fit with my setting.

Quick addition though (also big part of why I include it!): Naruto, in this canon novel, makes up a rumor that Kakashi took sexual … liberties in exchange for appointing the new warden of Hozuki castle (because Kakashi didn’t take him along). Imho that speaks literally VOLUMES. Not only is he secure enough in his relationship to/with Kakashi to do THAT (and knew that he would survive doing that^^) - but he, obviously, sees and is aware of Kakashi as a sexual being at that point. (And is being a (n jealous) ass about it)
Which carries its own set of implications.
So. Important waystone imho ;))

Also, the ending of the last chapter was a bit of a play on the last sentence in this novel, which is “Spring had finally arrived”, an euphemism for “blossoming love”.
I thought that appropriate^^.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

 

She stumbles, falling into his arms, as precisely and accidentally as back then, years ago.

Her eyes are still beautiful, big and aware, and there is a moment of breath between them, an awareness that shivers. 

The moment passes, with her fleeting smile, and her hurried departure towards the airship.

 

Kakashi watches her go, with a slow blink, and then raises his eyes to the ship, with a grimace.

Mumbling to himself when he sees something green, energetic and in a darn wheelchair hop onto it as well. Cursing in a very heartfelt way. “Dammit.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

He watches the remnants of purple lightning dance along his skin, glad to be back on the ground, and most people safe again, the airship destroyed, and their losses at a minimum.

Guy grins up at him. “It seems your training with Guren these last few months was quite successful.”

Kakashi hums, conjuring a purple bolt between the tips of his thumb and middle finger. “I wasn’t sure whether I could employ it this fast… but need makes way, I guess.” He frowns, letting the lightning roll into the palm of his hand. “It is weird that it is purple though, since her crystal style is pink?”

Guy hums, with a small cackle. “Maybe you just like more blue in your life? Like your soul-mate‘s riveting eyes?”

Kakashi snorts, letting the lightning flare out. “That must be it.” He inhales deeply, and then raises his gaze to the sky, eyes faraway for a moment. “That was quite the maiden voyage… assassins, hostages and old acquaintances… and almost an international incident.” 

Guy follows his gaze up. “We saw the world, through a bird’s eye.”

Kakashi hums. “It’s not that big, is it.”

Guy’s voice softens. “No.” He hesitates, and then adds, quite serious for once. “Your grip slipped when you saw it was her.”

Kakashi nods, and then looks down into his palm again, narrowing his eyes. “I wished I had been wrong… and I remembered that Naruto said, a while ago.” And she does fit the type.

Guy hums. “Tazuna-san told me he thinks you should just marry that beautiful lady.”

Kakashi snorts. “So he’s one of the few who do not know I’m spoken for?”

Guy grins, broadly. “Apparently they exist.”

Kakashi grins too, sending an eye-smile Guy’s way, before sighing. “Still. It would have turned out quite differently without Sai and Ino… and the others.”

Guy nods, and then weighs his head. “Indeed. Will Konoha’s shinobis stay here for longer?”

Kakashi frowns, tilting his head to stare unseeing towards Hozuki castle. “I’m not sure. I…” He grimaces, and then taps his foot, once. “I want to talk to Kahyo. Her Ice Chains jutsu may be exactly what we need, don’t you think?”

Guy quirks an eyebrow. “Maybe? But she is one of the assassins, why should she wish to incarcerate herself and as the warden at that?”

Kakashi sighs. “True. Still. It would be perfect, wouldn’t it.” He shrugs. “I looked at the folder Tsunade gave me… everyone else would need a guard detail from Konoha. But she could just apply the jutsu and then these prisoner could only defend themselves.” He pulls a face. “It’s so elegant. I want to see what she says to it.”

Guy nods, and then gives him a thumbs-up, with a grin. “And your youthful energies will manage!”

Kakashi snorts, and then looks up into the blue sky once more, absentmindedly comparing hues. “Yeah, we’ll see.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“That painting is something else.”

 

Kakashi raises his eyes to the large classical painting behind the late Mui’s desk, and then nods, standing next to the desk. “Indeed.” He hesitates before continuing. “You could replace it.”

Kahyo frowns at him, seemingly frail and harmless in the wide dress, with her hands shackled before her.

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “If I take these off, do I have your word that you won’t attack me again.”

Kahyo grimaces, and then nods, a bit sullenly. “Yes.”

Kakashi nods, and steps forward, taking the chakra-infused irons off. Kahyo rubs her wrists.

Kakashi extends his hand to the chair, while leaning back onto the desk. “Please.” He puts the irons onto the desk, clasping his hands, waiting until Kahyo is settled.

 

There is a small pause, a pause where Kahyo watches him, intently, from beneath lowered lashes. 

Kakashi smiles softly to himself.

 

He keeps his voice neutral. “Why did you run into me during boarding?”

Kahyo blinks, her big brown eyes on his. “That was an accident.”

Kakashi carefully eye-smiles. “Of course.” He taps his finger, once. “Actually, though, I believe you put the seal on me then, didn’t you. And not later on the ship.”

Kahyo looks away for a moment, face indecipherable. “It is a habit. A protectional instinct.”

“Mhhh hmmmm.” Kakashi nods, watching her. “I take it that means that the seal expires after a while?”

Kahyo quirks an eyebrow, and then shrugs, once. “If I am not in the vicinity anymore, yes.”

Kakashi nods. “A failsafe.”

She grimaces, just a bit. “Yes.”

Kakashi watches her for a moment, watches her wring her hands on her lap, just a bit. “I spoke to Sakura after she healed you and the others.”

Kahyo’s eyes snap up, boring into his. Silently.

Kakashi tilts his head, softening his tone. “Why did you do all this while pregnant almost 5 months already? Wasn’t it a terrible risk, given the obvious fact that you wanted to keep it?”

She sniffs, the words coming haltingly. “Rahyō was so driven to get Garyō out. I… that dream was so vivid back then. The hole in my heart is hurting, every second. I want to live, but… I’m not sure…” She trails off.

Kakashi whispers, feeling for her. “I have seen how children can heal the broken bonds and hearts… Don’t you think that you could maybe… allow your child to heal you? I mean, you obviously decided to keep it, despite everything?”

Kahyo raises her hands, starting to cry behind them. 

Kakashi silently steps away a bit, giving her space.

 

Kahyo sobs once, her voice ringing out after a moment, a lot more force than before in her tone. “I do not wish for my child to live in a prison!”

Kakashi blinks, looking back at her, and then around himself, at the heavy doors, and small windows. 

He clicks his tongue, smirking softly to himself. “I think we could find a way, don’t you think? I cannot pardon you though… not fully. Capital punishment has been demanded by the other nations, but since Hozuki castle is currently under Konoha’s jurisdiction I have some leeway. And I would rather utilize your unique skill… I… believe in the path of healing, and your child would always be welcome in Konoha.”

Her eyes fill with tears once more, one dropping down her cheek. “Despite of what I’ve done?”

Kakashi blinks, and then shakes his head. “But your child is innocent. Will be innocent. How could I possibly punish an innocent, now that we know you decided to give life to it?”

Kahyo swallows, her throat clicking, and she looks away, lips trembling. 

She laughs, once. “And once again you save my life… let me go, in a way.” Her big eyes return to his. “Why?”

He blinks at her, and then leans back against the desk once more, voice faraway. “I have learned a lot about fate these last years… you and I, we met as children, and then with my genin team, who were very much kids still at that point, and now… now you are with child.” He tilts his head, letting his smile color his voice. “It’s definitely a pattern.”

Kahyo snorts, and then ducks her head, shaking it. “You are a curious man, Hatake Kakashi. It is too bad that we are who we are and that you are bonded.”

Kakashi smirks softly, watching her raise her eyes back to his, the small beauty spot under her eye still alluring, her face still as pretty. 

He smirks softly. “In another world.”

She blinks, and then ducks her head again, with a blush, but Kakashi can see the small smile, the way her body relaxes, in increments. 

Kakashi clicks his tongue, staring unseeing into space. “If it were up to me I would send you home. But I… am going to be Hokage soon. My image is already hewn into the mountain. And I cannot escape the responsibilities as Hokage. I cannot subvert our justice system either, this frail little concept that keeps the bigger and smaller nations in its delicate balance.” He grimaces, shaking his head once. “What I can offer you is this post, for the rest of your life. And… a family for your child.”

Kahyo looks away, face twisting, her voice raw, wobbly, suffused with pain. “Would I have to give him up immediately? Or her?”

Kakashi blinks, and then smirks, gently. “Of course not. You are the mother.” He sighs, turning his head to watch the clouds pass by outside the small window. “But… a child can thrive on the love of those that give it love… even if those may not be the biological parents.” He smiles, softly, remembering brushing hair, for hours. Remembering hugs, and support. And love, so much love. More than I knew what to do with, then.

He clears his throat. “It is up to you, but in my opinion your child can only profit from visiting you, regularly. There is no need to sever the ties completely.” He shoots her a look. “We will have regular dealings, too. I could take them along as well, when they’re a bit older?”

Kahyo smiles a trembling smile, sniffing once. 

She exhales, shudderingly. “That is more than I hoped for.”

Kakashi nods. “Very well.”

She blinks and then smirks, with a quirked eyebrow. “Just like that?”

Kakashi hums, leaning back a bit, with a shrug. “Yeah well, if they really want me to take that darn hat they need to get used to my rulings, right.”

Kahyo smiles, broadly, for a moment. “Right.”

Kakashi nods, and then pushes up again. “I will give the necessary orders. And I will have a midwife come here, and a proper doctor. Everything else… we’ll have to see.”

 

Kahyo exhales, and then closes her eyes for a long moment, before locking them with Kakashi’s again. “Very well.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Tsunade smirks at him, when they finally leave Hozuki castle again, the prisoners safely locked inside, and Kahyo properly instated. 

Her voice carries a tease. “Well done, Rokudaime.”

He shoots her a look. “I hope it works.”

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow. “Oh I bet it will. After she humiliated Ay I think her status is quite clear.”

Kakashi grimaces, remembering the raikage so easily defeated. “Yeah… that wasn’t too pretty.”

Tsunade clicks her tongue. “He shouldn’t have doubted your judgement.”

Kakashi shoots her a look. “That simple?”

She shrugs. “He’s old enough to know when to quit and he didn’t.” She turns her head to him, her hazel eyes glittering. “I know when to quit, too.” 

Kakashi lowers his gaze for a moment, and then looks up to her. “Are you ready?”

She smirks, and looks away, before nodding. “I think so, yes.” She snorts. “We might be back before you know it, with a literal bog-body.”

Kakashi pulls a face, with a shudder. “I sure hope not?”

Tsunade chuckles, and then sobers, with another shrug. “We’ll see.” She raises her hand and squeezes his shoulder, with a grin. “First we return and then the inauguration though.”

Kakashi pulls a face. “Right.”

Tsunade snorts. “Honestly, Hatake Kakashi, you are the only one who should get that darn hat, you do realize that, don’t you.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes.

Tsunade hums, and then bumps into him, softly. “You even found a way to use your chidori again, in a way, without the sharingan. And your chakra reserves have been surging, now that they’re not constantly depleted. I believe you are stronger than ever.” She lifts her eyebrows. “And you have settled into the responsibility, haven’t you? With that first ruling?”

Kakashi blinks, and then inhales deeply, raising his eyes to the sky again. “The prospect of wearing it does seem easier, yes.”

Tsunade nods, and then waggles her eyebrows. “Just drink enough coffee before the meetings with the daimyo.”

Kakashi snorts. “Ha ha.”

“I’m dead serious.” Tsunade grins, sending him a sly look. “And choose your advisors well.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, sending her a sidelong look. “Doubts about that?”

Tsunade turns away, throwing the words back over her shoulder. “Not the slightest.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

It’s bad enough he hears some of the others insinuate.

It’s bad enough to see the looks.

 

But Naruto really has the gall… the gall to speak it out loud. Eyes flashing. Fangs elongated. And out. Pushing, obviously. Vibrating with energy, too.

Energy Kakashi cannot quite place.

 

Energy that keeps him from … fucking killing Naruto right there on the spot.

 

 

 

And Kakashi hasn’t even read her darn letter yet.

 

 

 

Kakashi supposes he should be flattered that Naruto is pissed off and jealous enough to be this… petty. But honestly, given what he has done, and given who he did indeed have sex with… and then insinuating he abused his position for sex with Kahyo…

 

He tries to keep his voice level, painfully aware they’re in the middle of the new market district, with lots of people watching. “Naruto, for the last time, I did not have an affair with the new warden of Hozuki castle, and I did not receive services like that in order for her to get that post.”

Naruto’s eyes flash, and Kakashi couldn’t swear on it, but they look like a fox’s for a split second. 

His voice trembles, while his mouth laughs. “But Sensei, I heard that people said you were smitten… and that you made such a fine couple.” His tone now has an acerbic undertone to it that bites. “They said she would be the perfect wife for you.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes.

Naruto continues, his own narrowed now as well, cheeks flushed. “Also, if you say you didn’t receive services, doe…”

Kakashi interjects, bitingly. “Enough.” He glowers at Naruto, and then lowers his voice, repeating eyes flickering to Hinata and Sakura for a split second, who are watching silently. “Enough.”

 

Kakashi grimaces, and then steps up to Naruto, closely, tilting his head to whisper against Naruto’s cheek. “Why.”

It’s not a question, and Kakashi knows Naruto knows, when he swallows, harshly.

There’s hardly any space between them, and Kakashi tries not to breathe too deeply, painfully aware of the pull that wants to drag him into Naruto’s arms right now, audience and situation be damned.

Naruto tilts his head, just a bit, connects his jawline with Kakashi’s clothed chin.

His words are drenched in hurt and self-hatred. “You didn’t take me along.”

Kakashi blinks, and then frowns, withdrawing the tiniest bit to look at him. “What?”

 

Naruto blinks, and then fidgets, just a bit, echoed by fluttering lashes. “I… we are going to be…” He pauses, and Kakashi can see a myriad of emotions flitter across the beautiful face, before it settles into stubbornness, reflected in the tone of Naruto’s now heated voice. “We are bonded. I don’t want anybody to think they could take a shot.”

Kakashi blinks, heat spreading at his very core, heat he cannot quite put a name to. 

He clicks his tongue, whispering, aware he’s putting oil to the fire. “I am not your property, Naruto.” Naruto’s eyes snap to his, and Kakashi lifts his eyebrows, holding the burning gaze. “And honestly, even though it is not what happened, if it had… I wouldn’t apologize for it.” Kakashi blinks, amending, some humor entering his tone again. “Though I would never have done what you insinuated, but you know that.”

Naruto’s nostrils flare, and he looks away, fidgeting again.

Kakashi resists the temptation to look down and check whether the fingernails are claws now.

 

Kakashi licks his lips, voice still low. “Where’s Sasuke?”

A pinched expression enters Naruto’s features. “With Itachi.”

Kakashi hums. “And why are you not with them?”

Naruto turns his head, looks away. His voice is gravelly. “I wanted…” He grimaces, starting again. “I needed…” He trails off.

Kakashi reaches up, and gently turns Naruto’s face to himself, with fingers under his jaw. 

Naruto lets him, gaze lowered. 

Kakashi strokes his thumb over the fine stubble on Naruto’s chin, watching him shiver. "My inauguration is in two weeks, we settled the date.“

Naruto‘s eyes come up, slowly, blinking. "You did?“

Kakashi nods, minutely. "I want you at my side then.“ He leans in, whispering against the shell of Naruto’s ear, enjoying seeing goosebumps spread, everywhere. "Isn’t that more important?“

Naruto swallows, noisily. 

Kakashi hums, and then presses his lips even closer, deliberately puffing his breath against the sensitive spot. "You will never ever spread a rumor like that again, Naruto. Right?“

Naruto shivers, a full-body helpless shiver that Kakashi files away carefully for later. 

His voice is scratchy. "Right.“

Kakashi withdraws a bit and Naruto’s almost black eyes find his, the iris just a thin ring of blue. "I just cannot stand the thought…“

Kakashi gazes at him, solemnly, silently, and Naruto trails off, looking away eventually. 

 

The thrum between them is a heartbeat, pushing and pulling. 

 

Necessary. 

 

Kakashi smirks, eventually. "Maybe you should talk to your Mom. She seems to have mastered it?“

Naruto snorts, but ducks his head, with a blush. "Yeahh…“ He sniffs, and then exhales, shudderingly. "She and Dad have started to train academy kids in the afternoon.“

Kakashi smirks, remembering. "That’s good?“

Naruto nods, and then relaxes, just a bit. "I know.“

Kakashi prompts, softly, trying to read the tone. "But?“

Naruto rolls his eyes, voice so low Kakashi almost doesn’t understand him. "I want her to train me…?“

Kakashi hums, with a nod. "Tell her? Maybe she hasn’t yet because she thought you had too much on your plate already?“

Naruto frowns, and then bites his lips. "Is that why you didn’t take me along?“

Kakashi blinks. "Naruto. I didn’t take you along because there were a lot of Konoha‘s shinobis already there. And because I took Guy along. If I had taken you…“ He trails off, knowing Naruto understands very well. If I had taken you we wouldn’t have been able to concentrate. 

Naruto‘s words are a breath. "You almost died.“ His eyes fill with tears. "How can I protect you if I‘m not there?“

Kakashi shivers, the sudden pain bleeding from Naruto a jab to his very core. Oh. And you‘ve been terrified. 

He swallows, tone broken. "I‘m here though?“ I‘m alive. 

Naruto grimaces. "I heard you fell. Passengers died. I can literally fly. If I‘d been there…“

Kakashi closes his eyes, interjecting quietly, putting all his feelings into his words. "Naruto, stop.“ He reopens his eyes, locking them with Naruto’s now tear-filled ones. "You will never manage to be everywhere at once. You have to trust others to find a way, too.“ You have to trust me, in this as well. He gentles his voice further, hearing what is unsaid. "And, as bitter as it is, you cannot save everyone.“

Naruto‘s face twists. "I have to try?!“

Kakashi exhales, watching his eyes, carefully. Reiterating. "You cannot. It’s an impossible goal.“ Kakashi swallows. I know it is. 

Naruto looks away. 

Kakashi lifts his hand, places it on Naruto’s cheek, stroking it, the whiskers tickling. "It’s a harsh lesson to learn. Even with, and especially despite your powers. Strength and power do bring responsibility with them… but they will also make you feel powerless at times.“

Naruto swallows, nestling into his hand, just a bit. 

 

Kakashi watches him a moment longer, and then drops his hand, compensating the loss of connection by reaching. Echoing the soft, instinctual smile. 

"Why don’t I invite you and Sakura and Hinata to ramen, hmm?“

Naruto sniffs, and then looks at him, smile wobbly. "I‘d love that.“

Kakashi smirks, softly. "Yeah. Me too.“

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

It’s late that night, after lunch, and a quick visit to see Minato and Kushina with Naruto, and after some more meetings, and making the rounds once more, and after grinning at spotting Iruka and Obito eating a small picknick on a bench in the park in the sunset, after trying to evade Sakura’s parents on their evening walk and failing and subsequently getting his ear talked off, after finally getting back to that little apartment… it’s late that night, when he changes, that he catches sight of his tattoo in the little mirror he’s hung up.

 

He stares at it, there in the small reflection, the single light bulb in the room just bright enough to not leave any doubt. 

 

Stares at the solid black lines, the contrast sharp still, after all these years, courtesy of the special ink used.

 

Stares, and then reaches for a moment, and the thrum comes, obediently, simply, breathtakingly, and he watches the smile on his own face spread, and he stares at himself, carefully aligning what was with what he… sees. 

 

 

Reliving, for a moment, the way Naruto’s eyes had flashed, fangs out.

 

 

 

And it feels good.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Sensei Kakashi.”

 

Kakashi hums, stepping up to Sai, who is sitting on a roof close to the market district, doodling almost lazily.

Kakashi drops down next to him, settling with his feet hanging down, too. 

He waits until Sai has finished his current stroke and looks up, the scenery depicted on the paper a moment of life, vibrant and yet abstract. Contradictory, if not for the immense skill of the artist.

“We haven’t talked yet, after the war.”

Sai blinks, and then looks up, face expressionless, but Kakashi can see him look out for a moment, obviously remembering. “There was not much to talk about.” Sai blinks again, and then adds, dispassionately, slyly. “At least not in regards to me.”

Kakashi grunts, a smirk tugging on his lips, and then nods. “Yeah, I got a bit of the center stage, rumor- and relationships-wise.”

Sai hums, eyebrows raised. “Those were good kisses, there on that battlefield.”

Kakashi clears his throat, refusing to blush, tone dry. “Glad you think so.”

Sai tilts his head. “You do not?” He blinks again. “Your body’s reactions said otherwise, I saw your pupils dilate, and your blood flow chan…”

“Yes yes yes, those were good kisses.” Kakashi almost rolls his eyes, though he is not sure whether the impulse is directed at Sai… or himself. I’m almost 33. For heaven’s sake, getting kissed should not be this embarrassing. 

He clears his throat. “Anyways, I wanted to talk with you about Shin.”

Sai hesitates, and then puts his brushes down, his fingertips hovering over them for a long moment. “I finished my book.”

Kakashi blinks, with a frown. “Your book?”

Sai nods, once. “Yes. My book about him and me… I had colored it in before, but it… never felt done before.”

Kakashi smirks softly, remembering his and Iruka’s talk a while back. “That which touches our souls needs proper closure.”

Sai tilts his head. “Indeed.” 

Kakashi hesitates, and then simply says: “I’m glad.”

Sai blinks, and then a small smile flits over his face, there and gone again. “So am I.” He hesitates, and then shoots Kakashi a look. “Yamato-san is becoming your bodyguard.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Yes.”

Sai tilts his head. “He asked me to become head of the Anbu.”

Kakashi blinks, and then clicks his tongue, with a small smile. “And you would be the perfect candidate.”

Sai quirks an eyebrow, face expressionless, but there is something in his tone that shivers. “We need to pull up the dark roots of it.”

Kakashi hums. “Literally, even.” He shares a quick look with Sai, who watches him now, calmly. “The Ne have fulfilled their purpose, haven’t they. But if we wish to go forward, we need to let the light in, lest we repeat the past.”

Sai blinks, nodding once. “I would change the Anbu’s purpose.”

Kakashi inhales, deeply, look out over the bustling streets of Konoha. For a moment, he sees everyone he has ever killed, all the blood dropping from his hands. The wounds on his body throb, in sync with reality. 

His voice is soft. “You do that.” He clears his throat. “We do need protectors, instead of killers, to face what is to come.”

Sai tilts his head, and then nods towards the general direction of the tower. “What about the intelligence headquarter? We should think about setting a chakra border, like we used to.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Good idea. But we haven’t had one for a while, as you probably know, because it was held up by members of the Yamanaka clan… there simply weren’t enough members proficient enough and willing to continuously uphold it for a while.”

Sai hums. “We need technology to enhance the skills of those that are willing.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “We do.” He purses his lips, shooting Sai a look from the corner of his eyes. “Something tells me you have already talked to Ino. Or Inoichi-san.”

Sai ducks his head a bit, and Kakashi watches in rapt fascination as a miniature blush spreads, there and gone again. “Ino… doesn’t want to spend her life hooked up to a sensory machine either. But she wants Konoha save, and we have talked to Inoichi-san already, yes.”

Kakashi waits, and then prompts, softly. “And?”

Sai sighs through his nose. “Amegakure was always rather advanced, technology-wise.”

Kakashi nods, with a click of his tongues, remembering the heavily industrialized village. “That it was. Likely is.”

Sai nods. “If I remember correctly from the reports, the machine Nagato used to send and receive signals to the reanimated Pains should be here somewhere.”

Kakashi blinks, and then turns to Sai, tone dry. “You know, that…”, slipped my mind, “that’s true.”

Sai’s dark eyes blink up to him. “We should build a solid relationship with Amegakure, to invite engineers to our village. We should use Nagato’s machine as a first template to find a way to sense for certain chakras. Develop it further from there.”

Kakashi nods, slowly. “We should.”

Sai tilts his head. “Do you think Naruto will allow us to use it?”

Kakashi hesitates, and then shrugs, again slowly. “It is the responsible thing to do, isn’t it.” He sighs, through his nose. “And I believe Nagato would have liked for it to be used for protection, don’t you think so?”

Sai quirks an eyebrow, and then looks back out over the village. “I do think so.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “I’ll talk to him.”

Sai inclines his head, and then shoots Kakashi a sidelong look. “You are a good match.”

Kakashi hums, eyes out over Konoha. “You think so?”

Sai shrugs, and then starts to put his brushes and colors away, slowly. “Yes. You balance each other out. I have known about your bond to him for a much longer time than the others have. It was of the utmost importance to Danzo. It was one of the reasons why he allowed the abduction of Sasuke. He thought Sasuke was an obstacle.”

He what? Kakashi blinks, and then frowns. “Why was it so important to Danzo?”

Sai quirks an eyebrow, still focused on packing his things away. “As a means to control the bonds were invaluable to him. He thought it would be as it was for the Sandaime, and his wife Biwako.” 

Kakashi swallows. “How… was it for them?”

Sai exhales, and then shrugs. “The family knew, obviously. They made demands. Biwako and Hiruzen recognized the bond early after all, it engaged when she was 14.”

Kakashi swallows, grimacing a bit. “Quite early.”

Sai hums. “Extended proximity.”

Kakashi lifts his eyebrows, staring unseeing into space. “The pull.”

Sai shoots him a look. “Yes.”

Kakashi nods, slowly, lifting his gaze up to the mountain, to look at Tsunade’s stone face. And you knew, so you removed me for extended time periods. “He fulfilled the demands put before him.”

Sai clicks his tongue. “Yes. And Danzo was very good in manipulating people into making them think it might have been their idea.”

Kakashi nods again, and then shakes his head once. “Well, I guess it really is good that Sasuke was the one to kill Danzo then.”

Sai quirks an eyebrow. “Which was quite a feat.”

Kakashi hums. “Indeed. By the way. I should probably ask Obito where he put the body.”

Sai taps his fingers on the edge of his painting, once. “You should probably ask Obito to work with… us. Or at least me.”

Kakashi blinks, and then turns his head, to look at Sai directly, tone careful. “In your upcoming capacity of head of Anbu you mean.”

Sai nods, once. “There were many events he was involved in. Things and places he has seen. He spent years with Madara, if I understand that correctly.”

Kakashi nods, slowly. “Good idea.”

Sai smirks, just softly. “Now that he has settled into his bond to Sensei Iruka, his wish to protect him will align with this task to protect the village. It should be an agreeable task?”

Kakashi snorts, and then grins, giving Sai an eye smile. “I’ll talk to him.”

Sai inclines his head. “Thank you, Rokudaime-sama.”

Kakashi grunts. “Kakashi, please.”

Sai grins, for just an instant. “As you wish.”

Kakashi grunts, and then pushes up, with a hand on Sai’s shoulder, giving it a squeeze in the process. “Alright. Please talk to Sensei Yamato and then why don’t we sit down tomorrow and go over the details of your upcoming service.” He clicks his tongue. “I’m looking forward to have you at my side.”

Sai blinks up to him, and then ducks his head, finger hovering over his painting of Konoha. “It will be my honor.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“So. What do you think?”

 

Naruto frowns, eyes unseeing on Kakashi. 

His tone is thoughtful. “I think Nagato would have liked that?” He blinks. “I mean, we would use it for defense, not offense, right.”

Kakashi nods, sharing a look with Inoichi, who is listening silently. “Indeed. But if we could repurpose it like that, we could keep the strain on the Yamanaka clan to a minimum, while at the same time heightening the security in a massive way.” He hesitates, eyes unseeing on the walls of Inoichi’s office. “The responsibility for it would go to the Yamanaka clan though. And engineers from various… clans, likely.”

Naruto nods, and then shrugs, refocusing his gaze onto Kakashi’s. “That makes sense?”

Kakashi nods. “Alright. Thank you.” He turns to look at Inoichi. “Why don’t you prepare a team to go and retrieve it?” He nods at Naruto. “Naruto will be here for the next two weeks, it might make sense to go and do it now, since I am not sure how the mission status is after the inauguration.”

Inoichi grins, for a moment. “Tsunade not keeping you up to date?”

Kakashi grunts. “More than I would like to. But you can never know where Naruto’s skills are needed. It’s bad enough we’re taking him off roster for the academy year…”

Naruto interjects, tone sullen. “Yeah, about that, why aren’t we taking Sasuke off roster for that as well?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “A concession in regards to fighting power. The kages are worried, probably rightly so, that we do not have enough resources in case Kaguya’s friends show up.”

Naruto frowns, deeply, crossing his arms. “But I’m not away. I’m just at the academy.”

Kakashi nods, with a sigh. “And you will have a genin team, eventually. A team with youngsters cannot be left alone just like that.” He frowns, amending. “Or, better, we decided we wouldn’t do this anymore.” He locks his eyes with blue, thoroughly enjoying the sedate thrum that pulses between them. “If you are out with your team you will stay with them.”

Inoichi’s voice is almost neutral. “Learning from the past?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “I’ve been told I’m the one to set the rules now.”

A small smile flickers over Inoichi’s face. “A good amendment.”

Kakashi nods, and then clears his throat, grinning at Naruto for a moment. “You’ll love your genin team.”

Naruto blinks at him. “You already know who I’ll get?”

Kakashi shrugs, nonchalantly. “Maybe?”

Naruto’s eyes flash.

Kakashi grins, silently making a motion of zipping his mouth.

Naruto’s eyes narrow.

Kakashi clicks his tongue, still grinning, and then nods at Naruto. “I want you to use the weeks to sit down with Sensei Yamato, too, Naruto. Try to find out if you have some kind of access now to the wood style. That would be a truly interesting combination with your wind.” He tilts his head. “In fact, I do not know if that has ever been done before?” He shares a look with Inoichi, who shrugs with a shake of his head. Kakashi looks back to Naruto. “So, a challenge.”

Naruto grins, waggling his eyebrows. “And accepted.”

 

Kakashi hums, with a smirk. “Very good.” He sobers slowly, and then sighs, pushing off the table he’s been leaning against. “And now you’ll have to excuse me, because I need to talk to Obito.”

Naruto pushes off the wall. “Can I come with?”

Kakashi nods, with a quick look to Inoichi, who nods, too. “Sure.” He walks out the door, waits until Naruto has caught up, leaving the intelligence headquarters with him, quietly. “Anything on your mind?”

Naruto tilts his head, opening his mouth, and then closes it again, with a shrug, before he sighs. “Not really. Just… I heard Sensei Guy call your fall from the airship a ‘Leap of faith’, and I…” He trails off. 

Kakashi hums. “And you wonder what he means?”

Naruto nods, silently.

Kakashi exhales through his nose, and then laughs, with a shake of his head. “I just… I had caught Guy. And I… lost my grip when I saw it was her. You know, Kahyo. While falling… I mean, logically, I should have come to terms with the fact that we were about to die, right.” He shakes his head. “But instead… I never really doubted we would be saved.”

Naruto blinks at him. “You didn’t?”

Kakashi hums, and then bumps into him, softly. “Nope.” He shoots Naruto a quick look, catches the quick grin and echoes it. “It’s… I don’t know. We’ve come so far… I just don’t think…” He trails off, turning into the street to Iruka’s house.

Naruto sniffs, and then nods, a bit wildly. “I know what you mean.” He exhales, loudly. “We’ve been there, right. Been there, done that. I am… not afraid.” He blinks, and then turns his head at Kakashi. “There is no fear. Not when I think about it logically.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, continuing, softly. “Just anticipation.”

Naruto’s words are a breath. “Thunder in the distance.”

Kakashi grins.

 

And then nods at Iruka’s door. “Wanna take a look at our future?”

Naruto snorts, and then snickers, nose scrunching adorably. “You think their behavior is exemplary?”

Kakashi grunts, weighing his head. “I just know that everyone thinks they are beyond cute together. And are a bit afraid of them. And I mean, you have heard of Iruka’s rants on behalf of Obito, right.”

Naruto groans. “Oh gosh, yes, I heard he even managed to frighten certain Anbus… Sensei Iruka is extremely protective it seems.”

Kakashi hums, and then grins. “Yeah.” He hesitates, and then adds, tone suffused with all the love he has for them. “I’m so happy for them.”

Naruto blinks at him, and then smiles, softly. “You really are.”

Kakashi frowns, though he still smiles. “Yes? Why wouldn’t I be?”

Naruto shakes his head, fidgeting a bit, one hand coming up to ruffle his own hair. “I don’t know, it’s just that…” Naruto swallows, and then goes on, bravely. “Compared to them I’m always just catching up?”

Kakashi weighs his head, and then leans in, tone low, deliberately diffusing with humor. “You really want to tell me you didn’t… learn from all those kage bunshin.” He raises his eyes to Naruto’s, slowly, viciously enjoying the deep blush that creeps up on Naruto’s face. Leans even closer, feeling the heat of it. “Tell me, who did you liken them to, hmmmm?”

Naruto’s pupils dilate, and his eyes widen, and Kakashi cackles, under his breath, while he also starts to feel hot. He whispers. “See. That’s what I thought.” He hums, inhaling deeply, deliberately, watching goosebumps spread. Breathing the words. “Can’t wait to learn from you.”

Naruto swallows, noisily. 

 

Obito’s voice interrupts them, suffused with humor, making Naruto step back a bit, ducking his head. “One of those days I’m going to catch you making out in the street, I just know it.”

Kakashi laughs, quietly, and then shrugs, voice lofty. “You’re welcome to try.”

Obito snorts. “Not even you are able to withstand him forever, Hatake Kakashi.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, watching Naruto’s head come up, eyes flashing, burning into Kakashi’s. 

Kakashi clicks his tongue, tone vaguely breathless. “I mean I don’t intend to.”

Naruto blinks, and then grins, a bit saucily. “I’ll happily accept that challenge, too.”

Kakashi swallows, while Obito laughs again, under his breath. 

He steps back a bit, extending his arm. “Come on in… or did you wish to stay out here?”

Kakashi hums, and then shrugs, while stepping in. “Not today apparently.”

Obito blinks at him, with a bit of a smirk. “What has you in such a good mood?”

 

Kakashi shrugs, while stepping into the living room, noting the open patio doors. “It’s just… things are slipping into place.” He shares a look with Obito, while feeling Naruto step close. “It’s all starting to feel…”

Naruto finishes for him, tone soft. “Right.”

They share a quick look. 

Kakashi nods. “Yes.”

Obito hums, smirking just softly. “I’m glad.” He waggles his eyebrows. “I know the feeling.”

Kakashi echoes the smirk. “Iruka is still at the academy?” 

Obito nods. “Yes, I’ve been cleaning a bit and just laying on the grass… it’s so wild for me to have nothing to do.”

Kakashi inhales through his teeth, with a bit of a peeved and apologetic expression. “Yeah, about that…”

Obito shoots him a look, tone amused. “Uh oh.”

Naruto snorts.

Kakashi rolls his eyes, and then presses on, deliberately not sugar-coating. “We need to talk about Danzo.”

Obito turns away, but not before Kakashi can see the grimace on Obito’s face. “Danzo?”

Kakashi nods, watching the suddenly tense shoulders. “Yes. You had a lot of… dealings, then. You… rescued him, even. I heard he possessed artificially grown Sharingans he got from Orochimaru.”

Obito sighs, and then crosses his arms, turning back just a bit. “He did.”

Kakashi frowns, and then lowers his voice, just a bit. “Obito, the fact that it was news for us that they could be grown is bad in and by itself.” He clicks his tongue. “Were they under the bandages?”

Obito sighs, loudly, and then points to the garden, sitting down on the small deck. He waits until Kakashi and Naruto follow him and are settled, too. “Yes. He had implanted several into his arm.”

Kakashi pulls a face, seeing Naruto’s matching expression from the corner of his eyes. “And that worked?”

Obito snorts. “Oh yes.” He exhales, and then shakes his head, drawing one knee up and leaning on it. “The Sharingan is a weird organ. It needs to be activated, but that activation is a spontaneous mutation. Once mutated, the abilities … get stored in the cells. Or, better, the information of them are. If attached to any living cells, the hosts body can access that information.” He sighs, and then looks up to lock his gaze with Kakashi’s. “It’s a mighty weapon. That’s why Madara collected so many of them.”

Kakashi nods. “Where are they now?”

Obito rolls his eyes. “Still in my kamui.”

Naruto adds, not asking. “With Danzo’s body.”

Obito sighs through his nose, and then shakes his head. “No, I didn’t want him in there. I dumped him in the old tanks of the sealed laboratories.” He swallows, shooting Kakashi a look. “You know. Where Hashirama’s body used to be. Right next to Tobirama’s body.” Obito grins suddenly, just a bit viciously. “I figured that would be a fitting punishment.”

Kakashi groans, reaching up to rub his hands over his face. “Orochimaru wants access to those laboratories.”

Obito cackles. “As I said, fitting.”

Kakashi shoots him a skunk-eye.

Naruto interjects, frowning. “Why does Orochimaru want access to the labs?”

Kakashi exhales, in a rush, and then shrugs, tone dry. “He wants a child.”

Naruto turns his head, blinks at him. “What?”

Kakashi snorts. “It’s complicated.” He smirks, and then at Naruto, watching the sun glint off the whiskers for a moment. “It really is.”

Naruto’s frown deepens, eyes flitting back and forth on Kakashi’s. “What are you not telling me?”

Kakashi hums, and then quirks an eyebrow, carefully taking the sting out of the words by making his voice soft. “A lot. But Naruto, that part of the past will be… over soon. Finally. It would not lead to anything good should we rehash it.” He hesitates, and then adds, carefully. “When the time comes, you can look it up, if you still want to then. But I would… just let it lie.” He shakes his head once. “It’s nothing that pertains to the both of us, and it won’t help if you burden yourself with that knowledge.”

Naruto blinks, staring at him, and then withdraws a bit, expression thoughtful. 

Obito reaches over, squeezes Naruto’s shoulder for a moment with his left hand. “It really isn’t. It would only dampen your light.”

Naruto blinks up at him, and then looks away, out over the garden.

 

Kakashi shakes his head and then sighs, addressing Obito once more. “I want you to work with Sai and the intelligence quarters.” He weighs his head. “And Kaguya, likely.”

Obito blinks, leaning back a bit, tone suffused with something Kakashi cannot place. “You want me in the vital security circles for this village?”

Kakashi smirks, giving him a wink. “Doesn’t it fit with the promise you gave Naruto?”

Obito quirks his eyebrows, sharing a quick look with Naruto, who watches silently. “Well, I guess. What do the others say to that?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Actually it was Sai’s idea.” He shares a look with Naruto, before turning back to Obito. “We will try to create a chakra barrier that is based on the machine Nagato left here. I would like you to help us reach out to Amegakure. Nagato and Konan cannot have done this all alone.”

Obito’s face darkens, sorrow bleeding into his expression. “No, they didn’t do this alone.” He inhales, deeply, and then nods, with a shrug. “Though I doubt that the ones that used to help them will be happy to see me.”

Kakashi nods. “Probably. And I’m not so sure about seeing.” He hesitates, with a grimace. “I know that people have gotten used to you out and about, not the least thanks to Iruka being ferocious on your behalf, but leaving the village is still… “ He trails off.

Obito nods, with a little laugh. “I understand.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “So, just a vacation with you and Iruka each year?”

Kakashi snorts, tilting his head towards the general direction he knows Sora’s house is at. “But Sora-san is here now, so…”

Obito pulls a face, tone deliberately put-off, and drawing the word out. “Damn.”

 

There is a sound that could, possibly, be a growl from Naruto. 

 

Kakashi blinks, and then turns, badly hiding his amusement. And the rush of heat that flashes through him, settling in his gut. “Yes dear? Anything you’d like to say to that?”

Obito laughs, failing to hide it in a cough.

Naruto glowers at him, pupils elongated. His voice is dark. “I would really appreciate it if you wouldn’t plan for another threesome in front of me.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, opening his mouth to respond, riveted to the sight of fangs just beyond those snarling lips, but Obito is faster.

His voice drips with humor. “Would you prefer a foursome?”

Kakashi blinks, and then turns to look at Obito, very slowly.

Obito blinks, spreading his arms, deadpan. “What?”

 

This time, Naruto’s voice is a growl. “Not funny.”

Obito blinks, looking at him, the smile on his lips dangerous. “Yeah, I can see that.” He shares a look with Kakashi, who is trying just to keep cool, dammit. “But I mean, Kakashi is still free game so to speak, isn’t he? I mean…”

Naruto’s words are a hiss. “He is not. Shut up.”

Obito blinks, very slowly, the Mangekyo twisting into existence. His voice is gravelly, scratching along Kakashi’s nerves. "If I were to take him into kamui with me now… there would be nothing you could do.“

Naruto twitches. 

Kakashi interjects, hastily, his heart besting wildly. "Enough. Obito, what the hell?“

Obito’s red eyes turn to him, face carrying a stubborn pout. "He doesn’t know what he has.“ He scoffs. "What he‘ll get.“ 

Kakashi grimaces, feeling Naruto vibrate with anger next to him. "And riling him up helps with that?“

 

Iruka interjects, calmly, from the open door. "No. But I agree, Naruto does not know.“

He steps forward, kneeling down between Obito and Kakashi, deliberately, leaning towards Naruto a bit. "Though I think you have an inkling, right, Naruto? It’s getting harder to ignore.“

Naruto‘s furious eyes find Iruka’s, the snarl fully revealing the elongated fangs for a moment. "Everyone just thinks he can enjoy himself… while me and Sasuke are just waiti…“ He breaks off, looking away. 

Iruka hums, sharing a quick look with Kakashi, whose heart is beating in his throat. "While you and Sasuke are just waiting to encounter Sasuke’s soul-mate.“

Naruto doesn’t answer, but Kakashi can see the muscles in his jaw jump. 

He sighs. "I‘m not sure all this is helpi…“

Iruka interjects, tone calm. "I disagree. Naruto will be 18 soon, he and Sasuke have been together for 1 1/2 years by now. Naruto will teach at the academy with Sakura and Itachi after summer, while Sasuke will be on various missions. Naruto will become Jonin at 19, likely.“ His eyes find Kakashi’s, locks their gazes. "Naruto’s parents are here, now. If they wish to go to the Uzumaki clan village, the best time will be after the academy year. By then, 2 years of the gifted reanimated time for Kushina and Minato will have been used up.“ He rauses his eyebrows, and then turns his gaze to Naruto, who is watching, very quietly. 

Iruka exhales, and then prompts softly. "So tell me, Naruto, what event do you want to happen with your parents still present.“ Iruka hesitates. "Or events, plural.“

 

Naruto blinks and swallows, noisily, and then looks away, with a sniff. 

Iruka shoots a look at Kakashi. "You haven‘t given that much thought.“

Kakashi swallows, too, voice scratchy. "Some? I mean…“ And Tsunade hinted. And Shikamaru…. "I have dwelt on…“ He trails off, suddenly feeling like the ground opens up beneath him.

Iruka sighs, through his nose, and then shares a long look with Obito, who watches, silently, eyes black again, before he addresses Naruto once more. "Naruto, Kakashi has behaved like a saint. Exemplary. Matching a standard that no-one thought he would be able to hold.“ Iruka leans in a bit, catching the wide-eyed gaze. "And so help-him-god, he will continue to do so if you don’t actually talk to him. Tell him.“

Kakashi blinks, mind a static, knowing and dreading and hop…. "Tell… me?“

Iruka ignores him, looking pointedly at Naruto until Naruto sniffs, angrily wiping his eyes, and turns to face Kakashi, telling, almost angrily, words rushed. "Tell you, that I want us to marry while they’re here. Tell you, that I want kids, as you know, with them here. Tell you, that I want them with you.“ His lips quiver, and he looks away for a moment, before he smiles, broadly, painfully, the white teeth glinting. "Tell you, that while I understand and… appreciate…“ He trails off, eyes unseeing on the garden. 

 

Kakashi cannot breathe. 

 

Obito speaks up, calmly. "Tell you, that all your well-meant plans are fucked.“

Iruka rolls his eyes, but sighs, tilting his head towards Naruto, though he turns his gaze to Kakashi. "Crude, but yes.“ He clicks his tongue, tone underlaid with a fine acerbic humor. "I‘d like to add that Sora talked to Naruto the other day. And she has talked to Minato and Kushina regarding all of this as well.“

Kakashi blinks, slowly. "What.“

Iruka snorts. "Right?“ He sobers, slowly, and then reaches out to trace the headband Naruto wears. "Years ago I gave you something that was mine. If I may… I would like to do that again, when the time comes.“

Naruto snorts, his tear-streaked face lighting up a bit. "You mean give him away?“

Iruka smirks softly, reaching to wipe the tears away. "I mean, your parents will give you away, right?“ He weighs his head. "I honestly don’t think Kushina-san will keep to tradition in this one.“

Naruto cackles, reaching up to wipe his eyes. "Probably not.“ He lifts his red-rimmed eyes to Kakashi’s after a moment, the smile brittle and pure. "I‘d love that, wouldn’t you?“

 

Kakashi shivers, captivated by burning blue. “Just like that? You’re still yo…”

Iruka interjects, calmly. “Enough, Kaka-kun.”

Kakashi’s eyes find his, as if in slow motion, and Iruka chuckles, with a shake of his head, before leaning in, putting his hand on Kakashi’s cheek. “Naruto may be still young when he returns from Uzushiogakure, but he’ll be older than we were when we hooked up? He’ll be older than his parents were when they married? He has never wavered in what he wanted, Kaka-kun.” Iruka’s eyes crinkle a bit. “You know, you should learn to trust your soul-mate.”

Kakashi’s world wobbles, and then blurs, the tear falling to the deck, silently. 

He blinks, but there is only one answer, so he just says it, feeling vaguely out of body. "Of course. I do.“

 

And Naruto smiles, widely, and Iruka grins, and Obito moves in to hug Kakashi, and Kakashi blinks, and his eyes find Naruto’s and…

 

 

Kakashi shakes his head at himself. 

 

With a sigh. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

The fact that Naruto -can- levitate is something that for some reason has been forgotten since “The Last” movie, in the last seasons and Boruto.
I know there’s a load of metas in regards to whether Naruto and Sasuke canonically kept their powers after the war (and which ones), but supposedly that movie is also supposed to be canon. Now, I know that a lot of canon, and especially the canon novels do contradict themselves with lots of little things, but I’m just noting that because I chose for them to keep their powers here. At least in that movie Naruto still has them, too, so…. *laughs*

Chapter 50: One hat to rule them all

Notes:

Yes I rewatched LOTR recently, why do you ask…

 

Another wedding party for me today, so posting a bit early, but luckily this one is around the corner, not days to travel with no internet like in May^^. 
Think the theme kinda fits, too? :)))
Have fun reading! <3 *toasts you*

 

ALSO: I put art into the previous chapters - by the wonderful Anannua and SD_27, who are just the best <333

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

“Sora-san.”

 

Sora blinks up at him, with a small grin, but continues walking, and Kakashi falls into step with her. “Kakashi. Excited yet?”

Kakashi grunts, and then shrugs. “I’d be lying if I said it left me cold, but I wouldn’t call it excitement either?”

Sora nods, and then smirks. “Fair enough.” She shoots him a look. “You and Naruto talked.”

Kakashi blinks, and then shakes his head, just vaguely consternated. “What the hell gave that away?”

Sora shrugs. “Not sure. But there’s something about you that’s different to a few days ago. Given the fact that Naruto was quite… unmoored after our talk I figured it could have been the catalyst.”

Kakashi hums, shooting her a look. “Actually Iruka forced the issue.”

Sora nods. “Good man.”

Kakashi grimaces. “Do you really think this is a good idea? I mean, hastening the pa…”

Sora snorts, interjecting. “Hastening the pace? Really?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes.

Sora sighs, and then points to a bench off to the side, waiting until they’re both settled. “Kakashi. What would happen, if you waited for a few more years, say, until he is 25, maybe?”

Kakashi grunts, with a bit of a stubborn pout. “He’d be a bit more grown?”

Sora closes her eyes for a moment. “Yes.” She reopens her eyes, and points her finger. “But you are not one of those men who go after young men and women, and then dump them as soon as they turn 25… you know the kind. You are definitely not one of those.”

Kakashi clears his throat, looking away for a moment. “Still. I mean, I…”

 

Sora interjects again, holding up her hand. “I’ll tell you what would happen if you wait those final 6 years.” She raises her eyebrows, waits until he locks his gaze with her, a bit warily.

“What will happen is, that, Naruto will be increasingly aware that the time he has with his parents will run out. He will be on missions, and preparing for his time as Hokage, of course. They will train, and they will laugh, but he will be aware of the fact that the things he really wants to share with them, with his family… are not happening. Because you withhold them.”

Kakashi pulls a face, picking at a non-existent fluff on his pants.

Sora continues, unrelentingly. “And if that wasn’t bad and damaging enough, all around him his friends and colleagues will have hooked up already. Will have their children already. And if and when you finally get around to it, his children… your children will be the latecomers. They will not grow up with the others. They will not attend the academy together, if they enter it. They will not go onto missions together, later.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, and then leans forward, putting his face into his hands, elbows on his knees. 

His voice is muffled. “Are we really at that part of life already? I mean…” He drops his hands, shaking his head. “They’re all so young?”

Sora hums, watching him, with a kind smile. “How old were you and Iruka when you wanted to adopt Naruto?”

Kakashi points a finger. “A bit older.”

Sora quirks an eyebrow. “And how old were you when you wanted to adopt him yourself?”

Kakashi sniffs, not answering.

 

Sora sighs, and then shakes her head. “Kakashi, we are at peace now, but they will come, and the shinobis in this village know it. And they plan to live.” She smirks, bumping into him, just gently. “You are aware of all the couples that have formed, right.”

Kakashi sighs, through his nose, and then nods. “Yes, I know.” 

Sora reaches up, to gently squeeze his shoulder. “It would be wise to not alienate Naruto from his friends.”

Kakashi frowns, his jaw working. “Is that really what I’m doing?”

Sora hums. “Not yet. Not really. But your bond is a very complicated one. You need to factor his needs into this as well.”

Kakashi snorts, and then scoffs, with a shake of his head. “And here I thought that was all I did…”

Sora smiles, and then chuckles, softly. “In a way. But I know one of the reasons why you fight so hard is to give him his own agency.” She waits until he looks up, locking their gazes, before raising her eyebrows, tone imploring. “So… give it to him.”

Kakashi grunts, looking away again. “Just like that?”

Sora chuckles again, and then sighs. “No. Let him do that academy year, and the trip to Uzushiogakure. But… talk to him about that. Let him know that you are aware of his struggles, and his plans.”

Kakashi swallows, tone gruff. “His plans, yes.”

Sora tilts her head, eyes watchful. “Are you really telling me you don’t want children?”

Kakashi sniffs, remembering the pang he felt watching Aiko a while ago. “I… I don’t know. It’s always been set in stone that he’ll have children, you know?”

Sora hums, with a nod. “And you just rolled with it, but you never really thought about it.”

Kakashi sniffs, and then cackles. “Stupid, I know.”

Sora taps her finger, once. “I heard Obito promised Tobirama that he would make sure you’d have children?”

Kakashi blinks, and then turns to her, vaguely peeved. “He told you?”

Sora tilts her head. “He also told me, that you didn’t really object. Just glowered at him.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “You know that really wasn’t the time or place.”

Sora hums, with a small smirk. “And yet the things we do not say speak louder than the ones we do say, at times.”

Kakashi groans, leaning back a bit.

Sora snickers. “I bet Obito has talked to Naruto about that, too.”

Kakashi grunts, feeling mightily tired suddenly. “You think so?”

Sora grins. “I know they get along like a house at fire… volatile fire at times.” 

Kakashi grunts again, tone dry. “They’re a lot alike… and then again not at all.” He shoots Sora a look, tone dry. “It can be quite disconcerting.”

 

They share a small laugh, and then Kakashi sobers, looking up into the sky for a moment. “Naruto will have biological children, we know that… I’m not sure how…” I fit into that. He swallows. 

Sora tilts her head. “Both Naruto and Sakura can create matter… biological matter, too. And you have the expert on biological experiments in your debt.”

Kakashi stares at her, flabbergasted. “Are you saying I should ask Orochimaru??”

Sora waves at him. “I’m saying no such thing. Though it’s always good to know that there is knowledge you can employ. But. What I’m saying is that there is enough knowledge around for you to find a way.” She raises her eyebrows at him. “So find it.”

Kakashi grunts, reaching up to rub his face. 

Sora watches him for a moment, her voice kind. “First the inauguration though. Feeling ready?”

Kakashi sighs and then shakes his head. “Yes and no? I mean… it won’t change as much as you’d think, because I’ve done a lot of the tasks already. But of course it’s a bit of a scary prospect…”

Sora hums. “But you can use your chidori once more.”

Kakashi nods. “In a way, yes.” He sighs, and then shakes his head. “I know I have to thank you  and Guren for that, but I’m still…”

Sora lifts her eyebrows. “Not Minato? Or Naruto?”

Kakashi grimaces. “That.”

Sora grins. “And thank goodness you’re not.”

Kakashi blinks at her and she shakes her head. “Kakashi, you are what and who we need. Wise far beyond your years, appreciative of the peace we can sense around the corner. You are not power hungry, never have been. In a way, even Minato wanted to have more influence than you.” She gets up, and then leans in to hug him, for a moment. “Enjoy what’s to come.”

She winks at him. “All of it.”

 

She turns and walks towards the market district, and Kakashi watches her go, and then lifts his face to the sun… and exhales.

 

 

Very well.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tsunade laughs at him, loudly, eyes sparkling. “Oh my god, Kakashi are you in there?”

 

Kakashi rolls his eyes, unable to be mad at her, the wide, white robes covering him from head to toe. 

His tone is dry and lofty. “I like it.”

Tsunade snickers. “The only thing visible of you is your eyes…”

Naruto clicks his tongue, something in his voice Kakashi cannot place. “Indeed.” He steps forward, reaching up to pull at Kakashi’s collar, suddenly very close. Whispering. “I like that.”

Kakashi’s mouth is dry, the thrum ebbing and pulling. “Yeah, why.”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, biting his lips. “The only thing visible is that which I created for you.” He leans in, breathing against Kakashi’s mask, sending shivers down Kakashi’s spine. “A piece of me and you and Obito, connecting the past, the present and the future.” He reaches up, his fingers hovering over the hood. “Just the hat missing.”

Minato speaks up, with a grin. “Hat coming right up… well, soon.”

Kakashi ducks his head a bit. “Thank you for doing this, Sen… Minato.”

Minato grins, stepping up to Naruto, and putting his arm around Naruto’s shoulders. “Oh, absolutely. Wouldn’t miss it for the world.” He lifts an eyebrow. “I have you know that Kushina got her hands onto one of those video cameras, and she’ll be taping it all.”

Kakashi sighs soundlessly. “Great.”

Tsunade snickers. “Now you feel like running again, don’t you.”

Kakashi grunts, not dignifying that with an answer. 

 

The door opens and Shizune comes in, Tonton in her arms, cheeks flushed with excitement. “It’s time!”

Kakashi inhales deeply, rolling his neck. 

Naruto grins. “I can massage it later?”

Kakashi sends him a thankful look, but shakes his head, tone low. “Let’s not antagonize Sasuke further today, hmm?”

Naruto grimaces, and then nods, stepping back. 

Kakashi can see Minato squeeze his shoulder before letting go. 

Minato tilts his head towards the door, and then bends to pick up the hat. “After you, Rokudaime-sama.”

Kakashi sighs soundlessly, and then starts walking out and up, feeling weirdly out of body.

Feeling Naruto behind him, silent now.

 

He turns to the stairs up to the roof and stops, mouth open, emotionally flayed open by the sight of his pack, forming a guard of honor up the stairs.

Kakashi swallows, noisily.

Shiba steps up, pressing into his leg for a moment. “Boss.”

Kakashi sniffs, and then scratches Shiba’s head for a moment, before he nods at them all, silently, and then starts forward again, trying to keep his composure. He hears Naruto whisper with Pakkun for a moment, but doesn’t look back, stepping up onto the roof with an exhale. 

Minato’s hand is in his lower back, just holding. 

 

 

 

The roar of applause as he steps up to the edge is deafening.

 

 

 

Kakashi blinks, rapidly. 

 

Minato chuckles, and then withdraws his hand, lifting it to signal for silence. Tsunade steps up to Kakashi, on his other side. Naruto hovers behind Minato, reaching for Kakashi. Kakashi swallows, something deep within him relaxing minutely. 

 

 

Minato calls out, words easily carrying over the place below the tower. 

“Friends, family, fellow shinobis, …fellow citizens. Today is a day I would have never thought would happen to me. Today is the day that I am allowed, have the absolute honor, to put the future of this village… of my dreams and hopes, into the hands of the man, whose heart I have known for years. Whose integrity I have valued, in this life and beyond. Whose skill has made him famous across all villages.” He pauses and then shares a look with Kakashi, smiling widely. “Today is a day, that we put our trust into the one who has never played the game of power.” Kakashi swallows, and Minato looks back out over the crowd, lifting the hat. “Today is the day, where lightning will pierce the shadows!”

 

Another roar of applause and Minato grins, before he turns to Kakashi, holding the hat with both hands now.

He waits until the applause has calmed down a bit once more, and Kakashi locks his gaze with his Sensei, drowning in blue. Deliberately not looking at Naruto right now.

Minato smirks softly. “Hatake Kakashi, will you be the shadow that protects this village? Will you be the fire that burns our enemies? Will you be the protector, that heals?”

Kakashi exhales, and then nods, once. Pressing the words out. “I will.”

Minato steps up to him, slowly, and then grins, for a moment, lifting the hat. “And so, by the Godaime’s goodwill and the power of the council, and the… dreams of what we hope will come true - you are our Rokudaime Hokage.”

Kakashi inclines his head, feeling Minato put the hat on, gently. 

The white cloth flaps softly in the breeze.

 

Kakashi blinks, rapidly, the world mute and at a standstill, for a long moment.

 

He looks up, finds Kaguya’s pale lilac eyes amidst the crowd.

 

 

 

And Kaguya smiles, brilliantly, sharp little teeth flashing within blood red lips.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Kakashi.”

 

Kakashi hums, turning to Sasuke with glass in hand. “Sasuke.”

Sasuke clicks his tongue, purple eyes surprisingly gentle. “You made it.”

Kakashi nods, and then snorts, with a shrug of his shoulders. “Yeah well, running was no option. Naruto stood right behind me. He would have dragged me back by the scruff of my neck.”

Sasuke snorts, too, and then ducks his head. “Yeah.” He clicks his tongue, and then raises his own glass, clinks it to Kakashi’s. “Sensei, may your rule be uneventful.”

Kakashi blinks, and then inclines his head, voice low. “Thank you. That is very… astute.”

Sasuke hums, and then clicks his tongue. “I mean I doubt it will be, but…”

Kakashi snorts, and then shakes his head. “Yeah, I doubt that, too.”

Sasuke grins, for just a moment, nodding at Itachi, who is talking to Sakura’s parents, seemingly quite at ease. “They took to him quite well?”

Kakashi hums. “Well, he’s been very devoted.”

Sasuke nods, biting his lips, and then takes a sip, eyes flitting around the room. “Not like me, you mean.”

Kakashi frowns. “I mean no such thing. I know you have been going through some rough times, but this is not a competition.”

Sasuke looks down into his glass for a moment. “It will be good for me to go onto missions.”

Kakashi blinks at him, and then looks over to Iruka for a moment, who is laughing with Obito. Stating. “You yearn. And you are jealous. Of the bond I mean.”

Sasuke pulls a face. “Not jealous… envious.”

Kakashi nods, slowly, and then moves in to hug Sasuke to himself with one arm for a moment. “I get it.”

Sasuke grimaces, voice wobbly. “I love him, but…”

Kakashi swallows. “I know.”

Sasuke takes another sip, working his jaw for a moment. “It’s such a shit show. There’s this underlaying anticipation of it ending, you know.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “By all of us.”

Kakashi takes a sip of his own drink, not daring to comment.

Sasuke sighs, deeply. Toasting Kakashi. “Rokudaime.”

 

Kakashi nods, and then watches him go, weave his way over to Naruto, who smiles at him, before his eyes find Kakashi’s for a split second. The thrum pulses.

Kakashi blinks, knowing that look must have hurt. Either I hurt, or you hurt, but we cannot have it all. He closes his eyes for a moment, reopening them only when her voice calls to him, softly. 

“What makes you frown on a day such as this, Kaka-kun?”

Kakashi reopens his eyes, gives her a careful eye-smile. “Empathy, I guess.”

Kushina grimaces, and then nods, with a sympathetic gaze in their general direction. “Yes, it is not easy.”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No.” He sighs, and then decides to take the bull by its horns. “Sora said I should change my stance on… waiting. That I should give him agency and allow him to make his own decisions.”

Kushina watches him for a moment, and then she taps her glass, once. “Hasn’t he made his own decisions since he was literally… three?”

Kakashi pulls a face, the phantom taste of bitter chocolate on his tongue for a long second. “Well, I mean…”

Kushina hums. “You are bonded. You’re not going to break up again, once you allow it?”

Kakashi blinks, very slowly. 

Kushina grins. “I agree with Sora. Let him mature a bit still by teaching. Teaching kids and the responsibility of leading a team will do that, as you well know.” She shrugs. “And then… he’ll be as old as I was when I married Minato.”

Kakashi shivers, unable not to look over at Naruto, who catches his gaze once more for a split second, before he turns back to Sasuke and Shikamaru.

Kakashi sighs soundlessly. “It’s hard to let go of the restraints somehow.”

Kushina quirks an eyebrow, and then grins, “Really.”

Kakashi blinks, and then shoots her a look. “What do you mean?”

Kushina waggles her eyebrows. “Tsunade told me about your first kiss.”

Kakashi blushes, and then ducks his head, tone gruff, though he doesn’t feel the anger. “Somehow I had figured it would be Naruto who would tell…”

Kushina giggles. “Nuh uh. Nothing after that comment on the battlefield.” She winks at Kakashi. “I guess that is something he’s keeping for himself?”

Kakashi hums, and then pulls a face. “Now I feel guilty for telling?”

Kushina clicks her tongue, but shakes her head, the long hair flowing. “Ahhh, he can just…” She waves her hand. “You deserve to enjoy the few things you are given?” She winks at him. “And… Kaka-kun, you should use this year to build the anticipation…”

Kakashi shakes his head once. “Sasuke is still with him.”

Kushina hums, with a tilt of her head, tone firm. “Sasuke needs to get a proverbial kick in the ass to get up and moving and find his own soul-mate.” She lifts her glass, pointing. “And he knows it. Because this is starting to be unhealthy.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking down into his own glass. “He thinks it will be good if he’s on missions.”

Kushina weighs her head. “I agree.” She shoots a look at Kakashi’s vaguely sullen face and then sighs, with a shrug. “Look Kaka-kun, I know you and Naruto have talked about all that. I remember the speech back then. Do you remember that also? Because we knew this was coming. All of us.”

Kakashi sighs, through his nose. “Knowing and feeling are two different things. And I know some of what Sasuke must feel now.”

Kushina nods. “Which is exactly why you should help him get a move on, because drawing it out will only hurt more.” She hesitates, and then tilts her head towards Naruto. “Naruto is already gravitating towards you. Even more than before I mean. The jealousy has increased.” She waggles her eyebrows. “The whole village is aware of that after the stunt he pulled with the new warden.”

Kakashi clears his throat. “I am aware.”

Kushina raises her eyebrows, tone sly. “Good.”

 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, and then snorts, with a shake of his head. “Honestly, I never thought you would be my greatest cheerleader.”

Kushina grins. “Well, as we have established I am not blind and you are quite pretty, inside and out.” She sighs, dreamily, in a very deliberate way. “My grandchildren will be so utterly beautiful.”

Kakashi snorts again, loudly. Yeah, well, we’ll see about that.

Kushina smirks, and then sends him a sidelong look, eyes sparkling. “The advantage of getting a move on while we’re here still is also that you would also always have a babysitter at your disposal?”

Kakashi groans, reaching up with his free hand to pinch the bridge of his nose. 

His voice is suffused with helpless amusement paired with vague consternation. “Alright, alright, I get it.”

Kushina beams at him. “See? That wasn’t too hard?”

Kakashi sighs, deeply, and then shakes his head once, silently, tone very dry. “You’re the worst.”

Kushina chortles.

 

Gaara chimes in, with a little bow at Kushina. “They say that the Uzumaki were an unstoppable force… now I finally know where Naruto has it from.”

Kushina turns to him, with a broad smile. “Ah, Kazekage-sama.” She inclines her head. “I have heard so much about you!” Her eyes flicker up to Gaara’s hair, and she grins. “Do you have roots in Uzushiogakure as well?”

Gaara blinks, and then smirks softly. “I often wondered that myself. While my siblings and I all have different hair colors, I am the only one with red… however, my father had red hair as well.”

Kushina hums. “Mhh. Though, granted, it is not a guarantee.” She points her glass towards Minato, voice mock disappointed. “Just look at me… managing to get myself the only blonde guy with dominant genes for hair color.”

Kakashi snorts, coughing wildly around the sip of his drink he just took.

Kushina drily claps his back, and then sighs, dramatically. “Sora and I had so hoped for Naruto to be a redhead, too…” She whines, pulling a face. “And now I have to live with this mirror image of Minato… and given Kakashi’s hair color I bet all the Uzumaki red will be history soon.”

Kakashi blinks, and then drawls, the corners of his mouth twitching. “I am so sorry.”

Kushina sniffs. “You should be.”

Gaara blinks. Slowly.

 

Kushina winks at him. “So, have you managed to talk to your bijou?”

Gaara averts his gaze for a moment, and then shakes his head. “No, not yet.”

Kakashi frowns, shooting Kushina a look.

She clicks her tongue. “Naruto and I talked the other day. While the relationship between jinchuriki and bijou is a difficult one, it is also an intimate one… Naruto said that a lot of the bijous miss their jinchurikis.” 

Gaara blinks, very slowly. 

His voice is very calm, but bleeds vulnerability. “Shukaku misses me?”

Kushina smirks, very softly. “Go and talk to Naruto, Kazekage-sama. You may be in for a surprise.”

Kakashi frowns. “But he only possesses parts of the bijous, doesn’t he? I mean, when the tree was destroyed the chakra of the tailed beasts must have been released…?”

Kushina nods. “Yes. Some left, I felt it.” Her eyes find Gaara’s. “You did, too, did you not?”

Gaara hums, weighing his head. “I did not think much about it at the time.”

Kushina clicks her tongue, with another nod. “But they’re tethered to Naruto, willingly. Kurama serves as an… anchor, so to speak. They seem to speak, regularly.”

Kakashi blinks, and then shakes his head. “It must be weird to have so many personalities in that… space in one’s mind.”

Gaara shrugs. “It’s pretty clear though that it’s not one’s own personality. There’s no confusion. It’s like talking to… you. Or as if you speak to your pack.” A small grin flits over Gaara’s face, there and gone again. “The closest to your summons would be Matatabi though.”

 

Naruto interjects, tone vaguely amused. “Though Matatabi is a bit more glowing than any of your pack.” He shares a grin with Gaara, and Kakashi sees the faint blush spread on Gaara’s cheeks. 

He smiles to himself, remembering his own thoughts after rescuing Gaara back then.

Naruto sobers, slowly. “But it is true, a lot of the bijous miss their jinchurikis.” He frowns. “Yugito was one of the jinchurikis who managed to be friends with them… Matatabi misses her, terribly.” He frowns, putting his left hand palm onto his stomach for a moment, and then clicks his tongue. “I will do no such thing.”

Kakashi frowns, too, with a tilt of his head. “What will you not do?”

Naruto sighs, shooting him a look with a  grimace. “Beat up Obito for killing her.”

Kakashi grimaces. Ah.

Gaara lowers his gaze, and then raises his eyebrows. “It could be argued though that Kakuzo and Hidan caught her. The Akatsuki extracted her.” 

Kushina quirks an eyebrow, watching him for a moment. Technically that’s true. “You don’t solely blame Obito?”

Gaara pulls a face and then sighs, softly. “Totally apart from our knowledge in regards to Black Zetsu the Akatsuki all were there voluntarily, with the possible exception of Itachi maybe. Without them, Obito… Madara, whoever would not have been able to succeed. Not even the most skilled and powerful ninja can do these deeds alone.” Gaara presses his lips together for a moment. “It was no accident that Deidara was teamed up with Sasori to come and defeat me. Sasori, who knew Sunagakure. Knew how and who to bribe.” He swallows. “So yes. Seeing Obito here is hard. But I do not solely blame him, no. He was used, too.” 

Gaara’s eyes find Naruto’s for a long moment, and then Kushina’s, before they lock with Kakashi’s. “And we all know what it is like to be used. We all know what it’s like to have done things we regret, terribly.”

 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. Yes, we do.

 

There is a small pause, and then Naruto speaks up again, voice low. “That is why it is important for us to take back our agency.” He inclines his head, tilts it towards Kakashi, though he doesn’t look at him. “Our agency is where our power lies. Where we shape our life.”  

Gaara exhales, through his nose, with a nod. “Having a clear intent, and a clear grasp of one’s agency helps with difficult decisions, too.”

Naruto pulls a face, looking down into the almost empty glass he holds.

His voice is small. “Does it get easier?”

Gaara inhales, but it is Kushina who answers. 

Her voice carries her love. “Not really. But as with all things one can get used to it.”

Naruto looks at her, and then blinks up to Kakashi for a moment before his eyes find hers once more. “But it keeps hurting?”

Kushina reaches up to rub his upper arm. “That is why you need those who will speak plainly to you to help you. Those who will get in your face.” She nods at Kakashi, with a grin. “Kakashi knows that, too, just look at his chosen advisors.”

Naruto hums, and then sighs, tone deliberately whiney. “Yeah, he took all the good ones.”

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head, voice carefully infused with humor. “Oh, I’m so sorry.”

Naruto pouts. “You should be.”

Gaara quirks an eyebrow at the repeated exchange, but doesn’t comment on it,, tone sly. “I’m sure you’ll find a way to make it up to him, Rokudaime.”

Kakashi blinks, turning his head to mock-glower at Gaara, who ducks his head, just a bit. 

With a grin.

 

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Getting back to the bijous though… how exactly do you propose Gaara should talk to his bijou though?”

Kushina opens her mouth to answer, but Naruto is faster, the words tumbling out with a big smile. “Oh, we could just ask him to manifest?”

Kakashi tilts his head, sharing a quick look with Kushina. “Manifest?”

Naruto shrugs. “Yeah well, like we know that bijous can be extracted and take physical form, right? And you saw Kurama’s chakra form on the battlefield, right?”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, slowly, remembering floating in Susanoo clad ‘fox’. 

He frowns. “Barely, but yes.”

Naruto waves at him. “There was so much going on, I understand.” He lifts his finger. “BUT -  I possess lots and lots of bijou parts now. Kurama in full, parts of all the others.” He tilts his head to Kushina. “Mom even survived the extraction back then.” He beams at her, leaning in for a moment. “You must be so incredibly strong, Kurama huffs every time I make that point.”

He straightens back up, eyes flashing, before Kushina can respond. “Anyways, what I’m getting at is that, whether I have my Mom’s resilience or not, letting certain bijou chakra leave my body and manifest won’t kill me. I’ve tested that.”

 

A pause, as all three stare at Naruto, the party around them a muted backdrop.

Kakashi’s voice is a bit pained. “You’ve tested that?”

Naruto shrugs, eyes fixed on his, obviously sensing his immediate distress. “I already knew it would work.” He grins, broadly, with another shrug. “And I wanted to know whether Kurama really looks as I see him in that place within myself.” He smirks. “He does. Even if he’s his own mini-me.”

Kushina clears her throat, very softly. “You let the n… Kurama out? In Konoha?”

Naruto blinks at her, and then frowns. “Yes, why?”

Kakashi watches in fascination as Kushina’s expression goes through a range of ‘responses’, until she finally settles on a vague: “Nothing.” While taking a big sip of her drink.

Naruto frowns, deeply, and then shoots a look at Gaara, who is gazing at him, with a weird little expression on his face. 

Naruto’s voice is vaguely peeved. “What.”

 

Kakashi sighs. “Naruto…” He hesitates, looking down at his hand holding the glass with champagne, his hand, which wears no gloves today. And which is half covered by the white robes he wears. 

The hat feels heavy suddenly.

 

Naruto turns to him, tone acerbic. “What.”

Kakashi reaches up to rub his forehead for a moment with his free hand. “Naruto, we are standing in a just barely rebuilt Konoha. The memory of the nine-tails rampage is still fresh in people’s mind, people who are still traumatized by the war we returned from not even a year ago. I’m calling Kurama the nine-tails here because I know that things have changed.” He hesitates, watching Naruto cross his arms, with a dark expression. “I will not use you as a tool, Naruto.” 

Kakashi keeps his attention on Naruto, though he can feel Gaara’s attention, too, watching him intently.  “However, I must insist…”, he hesitates, lifting his eyebrows, and locking his gaze with Naruto’s sullen one, “I must insist, even more after today, that you inform me of any… experiments in regards to the bijous.”

Naruto opens his mouth, and Kakashi lifts one finger on the hand holding the glass, waits until Naruto’s mouth snaps shut again. “I will not put you or your powers on a leash, Naruto.” He closes his eyes for a moment, and then shakes his head, with a sigh. “But maybe, please, have someone who could assist with you next time?”

Naruto’s tone is obviously peeved, curt. “Like?”

Kushina speaks up, tone gentle. “Like me, for example. I have experience. I can help control or heal, if push comes to shove.” She holds up her hand when Naruto wants to respond, obviously heated. “I know, I know.” She sighs. “And I don’t intend to chain Kurama. I meant when I said that you found a better way.” She shakes her head, watching Naruto press his lips together. “But there has never been someone with this level of control before. Of the bijous I mean.” Her voice softens, and she reaches up, to put her palm on Naruto’s cheek. “We’re just afraid something will go wrong.”

 

Naruto frowns, deeply, his expression locked. “I can enter sage mode at will by now. I can sense intent. I do not control them in the sense of the word. They stay with me because they want to.” He tilts his head, eyes flashing. “They will manifest when they want to. I know they will not go on another rampage. How do I know?” He lifts his eyebrows, his eyes locked to his mother’s. “Because they do not want a repeat of the subjugation cycle. Most of them are just happy to be free.” He presses his lips together for another moment, and then shakes his head. “I would never risk bringing harm to my friends and family. To Konoha.”

Naruto turns his face to Kakashi, his eyes boring into Kakashi’s. “You have to trust me.”

Kakashi blinks, raising his head, just a bit. He opens his mouth to respond with ‘Of course I trust you’, but closes it again, slowly. And here we have part of the problem, do we not? I love him, I trust him… but I don’t trust him ‘enough’, because I still see him as too young. 

 

Even now.

 

Still. 

 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, grimacing softly. 

 

Come on Kakashi. You have to take the leap of faith at some point.

 

He shakes his head, with a sigh, pushing himself. “You are right.” He reopens his eyes, locks them with Naruto’s. “I have to trust you.” I have to trust your judgement, your decisions. 

 

Your will. 

 

He taps his finger on his glass, once. “So, how about that: We will enter the new era properly. You will go and ask wether Shukaku wants to meet up with Gaara in his… mini-me state, and we will properly meet when he manifests? On a… state level, I mean?”

He turns his head, to share a look with Gaara, who gazes back, expression almost neutral, but there’s… vulnerability in the gaze, too. 

Kakashi smirks, very softly. “If the Kazekage wishes to, that is.”

Gaara smirks, too, with an obvious effort. “I… would appreciate that.”

Kakashi nods, and then turns back to Naruto. “Alright. Naruto, please extend our invitation to Shukaku. However, we will have Kushina along, too, as a precaution, since our skills are not comparable to a bijou.” He lowers his head a fraction, raises his eyebrows, tone imploring. “As you know.”

 

Naruto narrows his eyes for a moment, and then takes a sip of his drink. 

He clicks his tongue. “Alright.”

Kushina hums, watching him. “It is a good compromise, Naruto. The rest will be acclimatization, on both sides.” She reaches up to put her hand on his forearm. “Give it some time. It may feel natural for you, but it will be a steep learning curve for a lot of people here.”

Naruto pulls a face, and then he sighs, with a curt nod. “Fine.” He hesitates, and then adds, with a very low voice. “No Uchiha at the meeting though.” His eyes flicker up to Kakashi’s for a moment, and then back to Kushina’s, expression vaguely guilty. “Most of the bijous are not very happy with the Uchiha.”

Kakashi frowns. “Other villages had their own means of controlling their tailed beasts though?”

Naruto grimaces and nods, with a shrug. “True. However, apparently the Sharingan is specifically painful for the mind when used to subdue. They all hate it.” His eyes find Kakashi’s again. “Interestingly enough, they all don’t mind you there.”

Kakashi blinks. “They don’t think I could activate it?”

Naruto shakes his head, very slowly. “No, that’s not it…” He grimaces. “I don’t know how to put it. It’s probably got to do with the fact that it’s Sharingans I created.” He shrugs. “They say they’re different.”

Kakashi grunts, noncommittally. Different?

He can see Gaara quirk an eyebrow from the corner of his eyes. 

Naruto’s eyes seem vacant for a moment, and then his expression clears, a broad smile spreading. “Shukaku asks if we maybe want to go for a picnic tomorrow?”

Kakashi tries to curb his immediate mirth. “A picnic?”

Naruto grins, a shit-eating grin, leaning in a bit, with a whisper. “Yeah, I think he likes the domesticity.”

Kushina grins, too, and Kakashi is struck with the similarity of their expressions. “Really.”

Naruto rolls his eyes, with a chuckle. “And now he’s yelling at me.” His eyes find Gaara’s. “Still. He’s looking forward to meeting you again.”

Gaara blinks, and then nods, once. “Very well.” 

 

Kakashi nods, too, and then exhales, rolling his shoulders, once. “Alright, I believe I‘ve hidden with you long enough … I probably need to do more rounds.” He bows just lightly to Gaara. “Kazekage-sama.” 

Gaara’s eyes crinkle. “Hokage-sama.”

Kakashi shoots an eye-smile at Kushina and then winks at Naruto, who presses his hand to Kakashi’s lower back when he passes, silently. 

 

The touch burns, the thrum between them almost violent for a split second.

 

Kakashi’s heartbeat thunders.

 

He swallows, and then moves on, with an effort, turning towards Itachi and Sakura, who are talking to Sora.

Kakashi steps up, quietly, holding Itachi’s gaze for a moment, before he concentrates on what Sora is actually saying.

“… and if you then apply the form-giving part of the extraction jutsu to it, you will be able to form it.”

Sakura nods. “Yes, I should be able to shape it. I’ve been concentrating on the sensory aspects of it for now”, she hesitates, with a faint blush, “but you may be right that I should train the creational parts of it, too.”

Kakashi blinks, shooting a quick look at Itachi, who is also wearing the faintest blush. He ducks his head, just a bit. Mh hmmm, sensory aspects. I wonder what you tried to sense there… 

He takes a sip of his drink, toasting the group when they turn to him. “Here’s to you mastering that skill also, Sakura-chan.”

Sakura ducks her head, but grins. “Thank you, Sensei.” She blinks. “I mean Roku…”

Kakashi sighs. “Sensei or Kakashi, please.” He leans in a bit, voice low. “Please.” He clicks his tongue. “I mean, I get the official aspects of it, but…” He trails off, pulling a face. 

Sakura chuckles. “Alright, Sensei. I mean it cannot get any more official than you literally disappearing within those robes.”

Kakashi grunts, while Sora and Itachi try to hide their amusement, to no avail.

He glowers in mock-annoyance. “Great. Two of my advisors mocking me already. What a way to start.”

Sora grins, toasting him. “The best way.” She sighs, sobering a bit. “Though I wouldn’t have expected to be in this position I am glad to be here.”

Itachi hums, also toasting him. “So am I. I can only hope to repay the level of trust you put in me eventually.” He smirks softly. “Senpai.”

Kakashi nods, and then shakes his head once. Winking at Sakura. “Somehow I think that I won’t need to worry about that.”

Sakura beams at him, while her hand finds Itachi’s. “Thank you for this, Sensei. And also for giving Itachi the time to also teach at the academy from time to time despite his duties.”

Kakashi nods, with a shrug. “That is why I called on several advisors. You two, and Genma and Kurenai should be able to easily support me, while at the same time be there for the rest of the village, too. I want you to make the seat of the Hokage more accessible.” He hesitates, and then shrugs. “I know that will be part of my responsibility, too, but there’s no way I will be able to master the upcoming administrative duties alone.”

Sora hums. “Yes, you will need several aides. More than Tsunade had.”

Kakashi nods, and then sighs. “Yes, though I’m very glad Shizune chose to stay. And that Inoichi and Shikaku have decided to support Ino and Shikamaru.”

Itachi nods, tone grave. “As you should be. Not always would the elders of clans listen to the younger members, as we well know.”

Kakashi hums, watching Itachi carefully for a moment. “Indeed.”

He takes another sip of his drink, and then frowns, tone careful. “I wish to make reparations to the Uchiha clan.” Itachi blinks, gaze fathomless dark on Kakashi’s, though he stays silent. 

Kakashi continues, after a moment. “Though… we know that these… plans were in motion for centuries, it is always the decisions and actions of the individuals which enable them.” He grimaces. “The Sandaime let it happen, for various reasons.” He inhales, deeply, shaking his head once. “We feel the ripple effects of these decisions, and will continue to feel them, for a while yet.”

He hesitates, wondering for a split second whether Orochimaru is comfortable in his newly reactivated hideout. “The old buildings are mostly gone now, since Pain, but the space where they stood is still open and unclaimed.”

 

Sora hums, voice gentle. “Tsunade did well to leave it alone.”

Kakashi opens his mouth to answer, but Sakura is faster.

Her voice is a bit deadpan. “Given how Naruto chased after Sasuke it was always a given that Sasuke would be back eventually.” She looks up at Itachi, with a soft smile. “Having you here was the big surprise.”

Itachi smirks at her, expression soft. “Indeed.”

Kakashi grins, into his drink. 

Sora speaks up, nodding at Sakura. “Tell Kakashi about your plans.”

Sakura blinks at her, and then blushes, spectacularly. “I… I don’t thi…”

Sora nods, interjecting. “Oh yes, it is necessary. Humor me, please.”

“Errr…” Sakura’s eyes swivel from Sora’s to Kakashi’s, slowly.

Her words come haltingly. “Sensei, Itachi and I have talked…” She grimaces and then licks her lips, straightening her shoulders. “It’s been a year already, since the war. After the academy year I wish to switch to a medical career. And Itachi and I will marry.”

Kakashi blinks, momentarily floored. “I… see.” He frowns, and then swallows the ‘already’ down, with an effort. Reminding himself that Sakura has been taking it slow, already, at least compared to other bonds. 

Sakura fidgets. “We do realize it’s still early. But…” She trails off, her hand finding Itachi’s, threading her fingers through his. 

Itachi looks at her, and then sighs, softly. “We think it best to make the best of the time we have, Senpai. Given…” He hesitates, and then adds, with a shrug. “What we know.”

Kakashi pulls a bit of a face, eyes unseeing on Minato and Kaguya at the other side of the room for a moment. 

He tries to deflect. “There is no guarantee that there is any kind of pressure though? It could take decades until they come?”

Itachi weighs his head, words hard but tone gentle. “There is no guarantee they won’t arrive tomorrow either.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, Jiraiya’s words echoing in his mind for a long moment. He frowns, angry at himself for not asking how old the boy with Sasuke had been in Jiraiya’s… dream. 

Sakura speaks up, tone careful. “Sensei, the children are the future. You have said it yourself, the next generation always surpasses the current one.” She smirks, whispering. “Let us live, and create and raise the generation that can kick the Otsutsuki’s butts.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he snorts. Asking, with a wry grin. “That easy, huh?”

Sakura shrugs. “No. But my point still stands.”

Sora interjects, carefully. Gleefully. “She does have a point indeed?” 

Kakashi shoots her a skunk-eye. “Don’t think that I don’t know why you want her to tell me.”

Sora grins, and then clicks her tongue. “Good.”

Sakura hums, her eyes finding Kakashi’s for a moment, a blush creeping up. “Maybe you should just dance with him again?”

Kakashi narrows his eyes at her. Remembering her reaction to the reverse harem. “Liked that?”

She grins, ducking her head. “The two of you are beautiful together?”

Kakashi hums, still with narrowed eyes, making her squirm a bit. 

 

Itachi tilts his head, smirking, but his voice is neutral. “We should pull up the trip to Uzushiogakure though, to the fall break.”

Sakura interjects, shaking her head, instantly serious again. “No. If we pull it up, then to early spring break. Suigetsu should be back then, and I promised to take him along.” She waggles her eyebrows. “And by then Neji probably has settled properly with Karin.”

Kakashi tilts his head. “Settled properly?”

Sakura nods. “Yes. They’ve moved in together, as you probably heard, but there’s been a bit of… an argument in regards to her working with and for Orochimaru again. That’s been something Neji had a hard time accepting. But Karin had been adamant, apparently she really loves research.”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods. “I’ll talk to him.” He frowns. “And her.”

Sakura smiles, just a bit relieved. “Thank you, Sensei.” She exhales, and then quirks an eyebrow. “The meeting for the trauma center still stands?”

Kakashi nods. “Tomorrow, 8am sharp. There’ll be an… official picnic later tomorrow, so it would be good if we could wrap that first meeting at noon, but that should be enough to kick some things off, don’t you agree?”

Sakura nods. “Yes. I have invited Yugao as well. And Genma has asked to attend, to.”

Kakashi nods, with a quirked eyebrow. Interesting. “Good.”

 

There is a small pause, and then Sora reaches out, to squeeze his shoulder. “Go and talk to Iruka, and Obito, and Kaguya and Minato and all the others, Kakashi. Now that you have the hat… actually being able to talk to people will become rarer.”

Kakashi grimaces. “I know.” He sighs, through his nose, and then toasts the three with his glass, before he turns away, eyes drifting over the crowds.

 

He sees Mei with Guy again, obviously entertaining herself fantastically, while Anko is sitting close, with a sly expression on her face. With Shizune next to her, wearing a similar expression. And standing very close.

 

He turns away, grinning to himself, and then an arm loops through his, Obito’s teasing whisper very close. “Having fun?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Some?”

Obito starts to drag him along, and Kakashi falls into step, letting Obito pull him through the room to Iruka, who stands talking with Konohamaru.

Who beams at him, when he sees Kakashi. “Rokudaime! Finally you cannot object to me calling you that anymore.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes at him, and then sighs, deeply. “I guess.”

Iruka laughs under his breath. 

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “So, how is life with Ebisu-san as your Sensei?”

Konohamaru groans. “Well, as you know he made us attend the tactics classes again… we finally managed to pass them. The missions we took in-between classes were C- and D-rank… I do hope we’ll get a few more challenging ones now, right, Rokudaime-sama?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, remembering the extremely bored expression on Konohamaru’s face almost a year ago. And he sat you through the whole course? 

He clicks his tongue. “If Ebisu-san thought you needed the tactics lessons still you must have been quite impulsive.”

Konohamaru scoffs. “Well, no more impulsive than Naruto?”

Kakashi blinks, and then shares a quick look with Iruka, who shrugs. 

Kakashi frowns. “I think that’s probably a given…” And you managed to learn the rasengan so early. So why… “I’m sure the upcoming missions will be more challenging. I’ll talk to Ebisu.”

Konohamaru sighs, shoulders coming down in obvious relief. “Thank you, Sensei.” He hesitates, coloring a bit. “I mean, Hokage-sama.”

Kakashi waves him off. “Sensei is completely fine, Konohamaru.” 

Konohamaru ducks his head. “Very well.” He smirks. “I’ll go to my friends now if that is alright, Sensei.”

 

Kakashi nods, and watches Konohamaru weave his way though the crowds for a moment, before turning back to Iruka with a frown. “Did Konohamaru want to talk to you about Ebisu?”

Iruka nods, sending a smile at Obito, who is pulling him in with one arm around his shoulder. Something in Kakashi feels warm, so warm at seeing the little gesture, and he blinks, refocusing on listening to Iruka’s words with an effort. 

“Just as Naruto, Konohamaru is burning to prove himself. Ebisu isn’t the most… impulsive teacher, and he is a bit afraid of giving Konohamaru too much leeway I think. And he is also still influenced by the fact that he used to babysit him a lot when Konohamaru was small. This protectiveness mixes somewhat badly with the fact that Konohamaru knows how to… exploit Ebisu’s weaknesses very well.”

Kakashi frowns, opening his mouth to ask… and then snaps his mouth shut, a memory rising of Naruto mentioning the harem jutsu in regards to Ebisu.

He blinks. “Right. Konohamaru learned the sexy jutsu from Naruto.”

Iruka snorts. “Oh yes.”

Obito shakes his head. “Well, we saw how effective that was…” He grins, clicking his tongue. “Naruto knew what he was doing, you are aware of that aren’t you, Kakashi.”

Kakashi blinks, and then sends Obito a withering look. “Yessss?”

Obito snickers. 

Iruka sighs, and then rolls his eyes. “Still. To think we could have escaped the bane of the existence of this… jutsu if we just had given that little boy a bit more attention…”

Kakashi grimaces, and then empties his glass, his mask wet. 

He blinks, eyes unseeing on the ceiling for a moment. “Obito… why didn’t you pick him up then? I mean… didn’t you know?”

It’s Obito’s turn to grimace, and he looks away for a long moment, the shadows of the past chasing over his face. He shrugs eventually. “Of course I knew. I had held Naruto right after birth after all?” He swallows, and then lowers his voice even more, words a whisper. “It’s a miracle that Minato has forgiven me that attack to be honest. I killed the nurses and the doctor, threatened his newborn child…” He shakes his head once, clearing his throat. “But to get back to your question… I knew. I didn’t… pick him up as you put it because I was preoccupied I think. And I figured it would suffice if I did it later, with the others.” 

Kakashi swallows.

Iruka watches Obito, and then probes, softly, when Obito stays silent. “Preoccupied?”

Obito sighs. “I wore a mask that night, but it hurt like a bitch that neither Minato nor Kushina recognized me.” He swallows. “I had convinced myself that I didn’t want them to know who I was, that is why I wore the mask after all, pretending to be Madara… but it hurt nonetheless.” He shivers. “The spot where Minato put the seal on me was like fire, burning me.” He smirks, bitterly. “I know it’s not the same and I know it’s stupid, but I can tell you that it was quite the punishment…” He exhales a shuddering breath. “It tore at me.”

Kakashi blinks, staring into his own empty glass for a long moment. “Do you think Hiruzen knew?”

Obito lifts his eyebrows. “He must have guessed, right? I mean… stripping Naruto of his name could only have been a fig leaf action. The boy looks like a mirror image of his father, and he wears the whiskers. Everybody knew who he was…” Obito grimaces. “Removing his name and letting him live alone was probably a compromise between the punishment some wanted… and Kushina’s wish.”

Kakashi works his jaw for a moment. “You think I’m being unfair to him?”

Obito snorts. “Oh no, he deserves all that’s still coming to him when Kushina finds him.” His dark eyes find Kakashi’s. “He chose to accept the pressure.” Obito frowns. “I know the hat comes with the need for compromise… but it’s another thing to cross certain lines.” Obito scoffs, taking a sip of his drink. “He made it quite easy for me and… Madara to manipulate things as we saw fit.”

Kakashi frowns, staring unseeing into space, remembering the prison. And remembering accepting the pressure then. He swallows, fervently wishing for another drink.

Iruka’s voice draws him back, gently. Correctly guessing his thoughts. “Exactly, Kaka-kun. I expect you to do better from now on.”

Kakashi blinks, and then cackles, ending in a sigh. “No pressure then.”

Obito smirks, softly. “I told you. X marks the spot. Let your heart lead you.” He swallows, toasting Kakashi. “It’s led us here.” He shakes his head once. “Amazingly enough.”

 

Kakashi swallows.

Iruka tilts his head, prompting. “So where is your heart?”

Kakashi snorts, and then feels, and waves his hand. “Somewhere over there.”

Iruka grins. “Talked yet?”

Kakashi nods, and then inhales, deeply. “Yes. Earlier. With Gaara and Kushina.” He locks his gaze with Iruka’s. “I talked to Sora. And Kushina also supports your… opinion.” He clears his throat. “It’s a bit hard to… I don’t know. Let go, I guess.”

Iruka smirks. “You can take your time. It’s ‘Koi no Yokan’ after all.”

Kakashi blinks, very slowly, his voice a breath. “It is, isn’t it.”

Iruka grins, nose scrunching. “It is.”

 

Minato’s voice comes, gently, with humor. “Just wait till you have kids though. That love will put all other love to shame.”

Kakashi turns, to look at him. “Really?”

Minato smirks, and then shrugs. “Really. Even if you never met your child before, ran across him when he’s already 16… the moment I recognized him was like pure energy, flooding me. It fueled me through everything I had to do.” Minato shakes his head, with a small, somewhat painful grin. “Don’t get me wrong, the love you will feel when you finally live the bond will be breathtaking.” He shrugs. “But a child that you want and that you love…” He shrugs again. 

Kakashi frowns, and swallows, tone brittle and breaking on the words, almost inaudible, admitting to himself. “I cannot wait.”

Minato exhales and then steps in to hug Kakashi to himself, squishing him in the white robes for a long moment. “I know.” He snorts, and then releases Kakashi again, waggling his eyebrows. “We cannot either.”

Kakashi snorts and then rolls his eyes, unmoored amusement in his tone. “Great. More pressure.”

Minato cackles, and then hums, expression sly. “This will be an interesting time, coming up.”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Aren’t all times interesting though?”

Minato blinks, and then sighs, reaching for Kakashi’s glass. “You are way too level-headed in regards to all this.” He waggles his eyebrows, with a bit of a consternated shake of his head. “I’ll get you another drink.”

And he’s off, heading for the bar.

 

Kakashi stares after him, nonplussed. “Did… Minato really call me too level-headed right now?”

Iruka shakes his head, silently laughing. “If I hadn’t witnessed it…”

Obito hums, a grin on his face. “Makes you wonder, doesn’t it.” His eyes find Kakashi’s for a moment. “I mean, we know that still waters are deep… right.”

Kakashi clears his throat, ignoring Iruka’s quizzical look. “Right.” He clears his throat again, and then exhales, in a rush. “Explains a lot, actually.”

Obito nods, with a click of his tongue. “Yep.”

Iruka’s gaze swivels back and forth between them, his tone dry. “I so hate it when you do that.”

Kakashi snorts, and then winks at him. “Sorry.” He shrugs. “But we cannot really tell if he doesn’t?”

Iruka grunts, sending him a withering look. 

Obito grins, lifting his glass, hiding his expression behind his glass before he speaks. “It’s a shame though… imagine…”

Iruka blinks at him. “You are aware that I know of the kiss, right. And I mean I’m not stupid.” He looks back at Kakashi. “With you?”

Kakashi blushes a bit, and then shakes his head, leaning in. “Nope.”

 

Minato interjects before he can say more, pushing a drink into Kakashi’s hand and leaning in, whispering to Iruka. “No, not Kakashi. Though red eyes stared at me nonetheless.”

Iruka blushes, spectacularly, shuffling his feet. 

Minato leans back, with a sigh, and a shake of his head. Kakashi distantly notes that it is getting long now, framing his face and falling down past his shoulders. 

He shrugs. “It’s weird how some things work out.” His eyes find Obito’s, for a moment. “But I don’t regret it. It’s… something that felt right at the time.”

Obito swallows, and then nods. “Still… if I… hadn’t missed you so terribly after I might have not asked for the seal, and…” He trails off.

Kakashi closes his eyes.

Minato’s voice is soft. “But Obito… it had already happened.”

Kakashi blinks, reopening his eyes, slowly, refocusing them on Minato’s face.

Minato sighs, and then lifts his eyebrows, tone imploring. “Obito, Kakashi had already met Naruto in Loran. Kakashi had already recognized the bond. I already knew Naruto would carry half the fox. I already knew he… didn’t recognize me.” Minato hesitates, and then continues, even more softly. “I already knew it probably meant that someone had released it. That I would die.” Minato swallows. “When I woke in that cave with two Uchihas… I knew.”

Obito shudders, eyes wide. “You… knew?”

Minato smirks, just gently. “But you didn’t.” He swallows. “Not yet.”

Kakashi frowns, shaking his head. “But you said you didn’t recognize…”

Minato looks at him, eyes wide and sad. “And I didn’t. Madara sealed my memory of that night, remember? But I… remember now.”

Obito swallows, noisily.

Kakashi takes a big swallow of his drink, the alcohol burning his throat. 

 

Iruka exhales, with a sigh. “Thank you for telling.”

Minato hums, and then smirks at Iruka. “We’re all in this together. By design or fate doesn’t matter.” He lifts his glass. “We’re here, now, to shape the future. Our paths have converged, in a way that… points to a rather big event in the future.”

He turns to Kakashi, blue eyes burning. “You do realize that, don’t you, Kaka-kun.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, feeling vaguely out of body. “That fate pulls in the proverbial firepower? And the most powerful Uchiha? That the bijous are reaching out, and that the ties between the villages are strengthened by every passing day?” He hesitates, gentling his voice. “That there’s a clock, ticking?” He swallows, eyes flitting back and forth on Minato’s. “Yes, I’m aware.”

Minato nods, eyebrows raised. “So are the shinobis of this village.”

Kakashi nods, too, Shikamaru’s words echoing in his mind. “And they want to live.”

The corners of Minato’s eyes crinkle. “Yes.”

 

Kakashi inhales, deeply, eyes riveted to blue, so close to his.

Blue that has always pulled him along, has always carried yearning, and love. Has always been safe. 

And belonging to one who prompts, now. “You deserve this.“

 

His own words seem to echo, another weight dropping, with acceptance. “Yes. And I, I want to live, too.”

 

He echoes Minato’s smile, and his gut flutters.

Admitting.

 

 

I want to live.

 

 

And I… 

 

 

 

 

Yes. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I deserve it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

This was written waaaayyy before Leo dumped the last model, lol…. still. 

Chapter 51: Black and red rimmed eyes

Notes:

Not sure what and how much you guys know of the canon novels and Boruto, but Kakashi went and totally… “updated” Konoha during his rein.

He was the Hokage who ACTUALLY changed the status quo. 
And I adore that.

I’m not going to “let” him be Hokage for the canon 14 years here (I’ll explain it when we get there), but I’m keeping those facts themselves (because they speak volumes imho), as well as the timeframe for the private events for Naruto *waggles eyebrows* (that shouldn’t come as a big surprise after the last chapters anymore^^)

Also: I started “uppercasing” the bijous in “Blood in my veins” and… I tried it in “normal” case here and it didn’t sit right :))) - so they’re not yelling at you, just… they’re BIJOUs you know? :))

Chapter Text

 

 

 

“It should be feasible to build the new trauma complex in time with the new industrial complex. And with the Kaminarimon company wishing to settle here it will finally be a center that can be reached fairly easily. At least if they actually do what they said they want to do, namely connect the villages with their train system.”

Kakashi nods, tapping his finger on the papers before him. “That’s good. We will need doctors who specialize in the treatment of children, too, as previously discussed.” He raises his eyes to Sakura’s. “Do you have preferences?”

Sakura shakes her head. “No. I’m currently going through applications. There’s a lot of… excitement in regard to the changes we wish to implement. I don’t think that will actually be a problem.”

Yugao nods, picking up her cup of tea and watching the steam for a moment. “Yes, the other day I was talking to Guren, too.” She nods at Kakashi. “The fact that Konoha is treating things just very differently than in the past has reached the outskirts. Guren may be a bit of a special case, too, but since her roots are not in Konoha her connections are vaguely different, too.” She takes a sip of her tea. “There’s a lot of excitement outside the medical circles, too. The Godaime did a fine job, but there is a buzz of excitement now, with lots of ideas. People want the change.”

Kakashi nods, and then blinks, watching her carefully. “Do you think the dreams are the reason for this?”

Yugao weighs her head. “Maybe a bit. The fact that those were addressed by you back then, acknowledged… I know it shifted the meaning of it for a lot of people.”

Genma interjects, with a nod. “The last year has been very peaceful. I know the shinobis themselves are a bit bored, since missions are mostly to protect traders, but people have had a taste of peace now, and they want to keep it.” He shifts his toothpick to the other corner of his mouth. “We should keep the momentum.”

Sakura smiles, fiercely. “And with these plans we will.” She shoots Kakashi a look. “Kankuro has asked to come by with some doctors as well, and Sunagakure has officially requested that we share our research.”

Kakashi nods, with a small smirk. “Everything except military research…”, he holds up a hand, stalling her immediate objection, “that is a compromise to the council. For now.” He lowers his hand again, with a shrug. “As soon as the villages are connected by train, I will work for a combined military force. Exchanges of training missions.” His eyes find Yugao’s. “I hope when the time comes you will teach - I won’t force you to fight, but it would be a shame to lose your jutsus.”

Yugao blinks slowly, and then sighs, with a miniature shrug. “I know, Senpai.” She shoots Kakashi a wry look. “I wish to teach Aiko when the time comes… it is her heritage.”

Kakashi smirks. “She’s interested in kenjutsu?”

Yugao grins for a moment. “She is Hayate’s daughter. I always have to pry the sword out of her little fingers. Though she does not remember him she exudes some of his characteristics.” She giggles. “And some of T… Yamato’s. It’s hilarious at times.”

Kakashi grins, and then nods to himself, remembering the flashes of recognition he had when he had seen some of Kushina’s characteristics in Naruto. “Yeah, that is a fascinating thing to witness.”

Yugao waggles her eyebrows. “Looking forward to it?”

Kakashi shoots her a bit of a playfully withering look. “Maybe?”

 

Sakura hums. “I wonder what my and Itachi’s children will look like.” She blinks, and then blushes, deeply, grimacing. “I mean… sorry, I know this is not the place, I…”

Kakashi holds up his hand. “Easy.” He grins. “I do think that Uchiha gene pool might come through, color-wise… sorry, Sakura-chan.”

Genma nods. “Yep, none of them had lighter hair than Obito. Or lighter eyes.”

Sakura ducks her head, with a snort. And then a very put on sigh. “There goes my hair color.”

Kakashi grins. “Go and have a drink with Kushina-san, she’s always whining about that, too.”

Yugao cackles.

Kakashi exhales, softly, and then shoots a look at the clock. “Alright. Why don’t you try to actually kick off these plans with the respective parties… and I’ll go for a picnic.” He shakes his head once. “With bijous.” Adding after a moment. “And two other kages.”

Genma quirks an eyebrow. “Two?”

Kakashi shoots Genma a look. “Mei is here, too. She wants to be there as well.”

Genma waggles his eyebrows. “Is Guy-san there, too?”

Kakashi grins, feeling viciously happy for his old friend. “We’ll see?”

Yugao hums, grinning, too. “Interesting times.”

 

Kakashi nods, and then pushes up to stand. With a smirk. “Oh yes.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

He lets himself follow the thrum, walking through Konoha slowly, glad he only donned one of the new uniforms, the simple, abbreviated letters of his current status on his back.

And his hands in his pockets, gait deliberately light, unbothered.

 

He returns eye-smiles at greetings, noting the relaxed and yet excited atmosphere, the market district buzzing at noon.

His stomach grumbles softly and he smirks, wondering for a split second what culinary delights will await him, the fact that his food is now brought by a chef whenever he returns to the new apartment they put him in a wild mix of appreciation, annoyance and mortification. 

And something he has been trying to get rid off.

 

The new apartment isn’t half bad - Tsunade had taken pity on him and had procured one of the smaller ones close to the tower before she had stepped down, the apartment splendidly set up to appease the public, and small enough to actually feel like some kind of home to Kakashi. 

He smirks to himself, aware that the fact that Kushina and Minato had simply stayed at the Hokage mansion with Kaguya had mightily helped with that, since ‘the Yondaime deserves that, right’ had been more or less public opinion. 

 

And of course Kaguya’s otherworldly beauty and intriguing indifference had done the rest.

 

His smirk changes to a grin, remembering the report he’d read the other morning, stating that the villagers of Konohagakure are slowly warming to Kaguya. Kakashi suspects it has a lot to do with the fact that Minato and Kushina drag her around the village on a regular basis. And that she is constantly gentle, always kind. The fact that Sakura apparently extracted all of the negativity in her is truly breathtaking. Though the fact that Kaguya was able to do that in the first place…

He blinks, raising his eyes to the sky for a moment, the day sunny and hot already, now, at the end of August.

 

“Kakashi-san.”

Kakashi blinks, turning his head to Shizune, who falls into step with him.

He smirks. “Thank you for not calling me by my title.”

Shizune laughs, under her breath, and then winks at him. “Just because we’re not in a meeting.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Still. Small comforts at least.”

Shizune grins, and then sobers, indicating the folders in her crossed arms. “We need a meeting though later. There has been industrial requests. We need to discuss where we want to set up industrial districts.”

Kakashi sighs, and then nods. “Around 6pm? I don’t know how long the picnic and… meeting with them will take.”

Shizune nods, too. “That would be good.” She frowns, shooting him a look. “On the way to the bijou-meeting?”

Kakashi hums, nodding. “Yep. It’s out on training ground 7, very far away from the village itself. You know, just in case.”

Shizune nods. “Which is a good idea. There are lots of people around still who remember that night almost 18 years ago.” Shizune hums, and then shoots him a look. “By the way. Your birthday is coming up soon, too. Since you’re actually Hokage now there’ll be a party.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, unable to completely curb his annoyance. “Another one? Really?”

Shizune snickers. “Yes. Really.” She leans in, whispering. “And usually the daimyo comes by for them, too.”

Kakashi grunts, pained.

He shakes his head, and then narrows his eyes at Shizune, wondering out loud. “Can I just… you know, delegate certain official duties? I mean the Hokage duties?”

Shizune quirks an eyebrow. “Delegate them?”

Kakashi nods, heavily emphasizing. “Yes. You know the Yondaime is here and he owes me.”

Shizune snorts and then blushes, ducking her head. “I see.” She hums, and then shrugs, tone sly. “I’m not sure, you know, I mean he died back then, he didn’t step down, so technically…”

“Ha!” Kakashi grins, rubbing his hands. “I’ll tell him.”

Shizune snickers, shooting him a bit of an unbelieving look. “You really want to shove duties at him?”

Kakashi weighs his head, clicking his tongue. “Ahhh maybe sometimes. He did say he regrets that he wasn’t able to change as much as he wanted to, so…”

“Mhhh hmmm.” Shizune grins at him, and then nods at the path branching off towards the training grounds. “Don’t forget he is also training the kids at the academy now, regularly. I hear especially his and Kushina’s fuinjutu classes are extremely popular.”

Kakashi nods. “Yep, a lot of the jonin class ninjas are also attending that one.” He laughs. “I mean, I get it, when do you have the chance to learn from the masters, right.”

Shizune shoots him a sly look. “You did.”

Kakashi hums. “Right, though my sealing skills were never en par with theirs.”

Shizune shrugs. “And yet you managed to seal Sasuke’s curse mark back then. Don’t think I don’t know how hard that was.”

Kakashi grimaces a bit, and then stops, a short way from the entrance to training ground 7, turning to face her. “I don’t think I’ve said it yet but thank you for staying on the job for me.”

Shizune blinks, and then waves at him, with a bit of a blush. “Oh, forget it, Kakashi-san. I’m quite happy where I am now.”

Kakashi hums again, and then leans in, tone soft. “You and Anko?”

Shizune colors, deeply, and then pulls a bit of a face. “Damn. What gave us away?” 

Kakashi chuckles warmly. “Nothing really.” He tilts his head. “Why are you keeping it a secret?”

Shizune clicks her tongue, eyes faraway for a long moment. “After I came to Konoha with Tsunade it took quite long for us to cross our paths somehow… and Anko didn’t want the… bond.” Shizune ducks her head, with a sigh.”I do get it. She’s extremely independent, and head-strong and…” Shizune’s expression changes to a proud little smile. “Realizing the bond can be frightening. I tried to give her space. And then… and Anko does not feel comfortable in her own skin right now. The whole…” Shizune’s face twists, bleeding pain for a moment, before it clears again, with an obvious effort. “Not knowing where she was after the war was hard. I mean I knew there was so much to do.” Her large eyes find Kakashi’s, with a sniff. “Thank you for not forgetting her back then.”

Kakashi blinks at her, and then moves in, for a moment, hugging her. Whispering. “That must have been so hard. I’m sorry?”

Shizune shivers, and then nods, but presses closer for a split second before moving away again. “It was. But it’s alright now.” She smiles, through tears. “She came to me. What more can I wish for?”

Kakashi swallows, and then nods, once, watching her. “Will you be alright?”

Shizune’s smile broadens, a bit wobbly, but she nods. “Yeah, it’s fine. It’s old, practiced pain. Pain that’s healing now.” She swallows and winks. “You know the kind.”

Kakashi exhales. “I do.” He hums. “Though it’s been getting better. Steadily.”

Shizune nods. “See. For me, too.”

They share a small smile, and then Shizune steps back, turning back towards Konoha. “See you later… Kakashi.”

Kakashi nods, with an eye-smile. “Yeah.”

 

He turns and enters the training ground, hesitating at the edge of the foliage when he can see the red shimmer through the trees. 

 

It’s… surprisingly domestic.

 

Mei and Kushina are sitting on the large picnic blanket, drinks in hand, chatting. 

Naruto and Gaara are off to the side, with Naruto talking excitedly, and Gaara listening, with a small smile. 

 

And Guy is there, sitting in the shade in his wheelchair, and an almost serene expression on his face. 

 

Kakashi smirks, softly.

 

Naruto’s eyes find his, unerringly.

 

 

Kakashi exhales, and then steps up to them, nodding at Kushina and Mei in the process, with a quick glance towards Guy, but unable to resist the pull to go to him first, the broad smile that spreads over Naruto’s face a beacon, calling to him.

He grins, too, unable not to. “So. Are we ready?”

Naruto waggles his eyebrows, while Gaara’s somewhat bemused smile breaks a bit, nervosity bleeding in. “Yep. They’ll go through me.”

Kakashi blinks. “Through… you?”

Naruto shrugs. “Yeah. I’m the gateway now that they’re all tethered to me.” He claps his hands, and then rubs them. “So. Are we ready?”

Kakashi opens his mouth, and then closes it again, with a shrug. Turning to Gaara. “Are we?”

Gaara hesitates, and then nods, once. “Sure.”

 

Naruto nods, and Kakashi can feel Mei’s and Kushina’s attention shift to them, though they stay where they are. 

 

Naruto steps back, just a bit. 

 

There is the sensation of power, imminent.

 

And then red chakra bubbles out of Naruto’s stomach, drips to the ground and billows in the air, splitting into two blobs after a moment.

And then the blobs shift, solidifying by the second, changing color.

Manifesting.

 

Kakashi swallows, shifting his weight as 9 little red tails swish through the air, still somewhat transparent but there, the sudden flash of memory of them against the night sky a chilling one, them, in front of the moon, that night, remember.

 

Kushina’s hand is on his shoulder, grounding.

 

Kurama’s voice comes, surprisingly deep, his red eyes watchful. “ROKUDAIME.”

Kakashi nods, mutely, and then clears his throat, turning to the the other small form, the vaguely round shape of Shukaku sitting next to Kurama now.

Kakashi blinks, realizing that despite the fact that the bijous barely reach knee-height the danger of them is still palpable, the power tastable in the air. 

 

Kakashi works his jaw for a long moment, and then lifts his eyes to Naruto’s.

Drawing strength from the solemn gaze. 

 

He clears his throat again. “Shukaku, Kurama, we are honored that you have decided to trust us and grant us this… meeting.”

Shukaku huffs. “MEETING? I WAS PROMISED A PICNIC.”

Kakashi blinks, opening his mouth to respond, but Kurama is faster.

His voice drips with… what? Kakashi cannot place it. “YOU’RE A GLUTTON.”

Shukaku blows a raspberry. “SO WHAT.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly. 

 

Kushina’s hand drops from his shoulder, slowly, and then she steps forward - and bows.

“Kurama-san, Shukaku-san. Thank you for coming to this picnic. We have lots of food we hope will help to change our past relationships.” She lifts her head a bit, her eyes finding Kurama’s, who is watching her, silently. “I’m sorry I caused you pain.”

Gaara interjects, tone brittle. “So am I.”

Shukaku shuffles his feet a bit, with a sidelong glance, tone gruff. “YEAH WELL, WE WEREN’T EXACTLY NICE TO EACH OTHER I GUESS.”

Kurama swishes his tails, just a bit. 

Naruto steps up, slowly. Tone calm. “I could eat?”

Kurama’s gaze goes up, the red eyes blinking. “YES. LET’S FIND OUT WHAT WE… LIKE.”

 

Kakashi steps back, extending his hand towards the blanket. Right. Do they actually eat? “Do your manifested bodies work as ours?”

Kurama starts forward, slowly, looking for all the world like an ordinary fox, albeit one with nine tails. He pulls up his flews. “IN A WAY. WE CAN EAT AND DIGEST IN A WAY THAT’S CLOSE ENOUGH.” He turns his head to look back at Naruto. “I’VE HAD THE SECOND-HAND EXPERIENCE OF MORE RAMEN THAN NECESSARY, SO I’M LOOKING FORWARD TO TASTING SOMETHING ELSE.”

Naruto snorts, tone light. “Hey!” He points a finger. “Don’t pretend you don’t like Ichiraku’s.”

Kurama turns back forward, stepping onto the blanket lightly. “I LIKE TEUCHI. THAT’S DIFFERENT.”

Kakashi blinks, with a small frown.

Shukaku flops down next to him, shooting a look up at Mei, who blinks at him, and then inclines her head, silently. 

Naruto settles into lotus seat next to Kurama, while Gaara settles between Shikaku and Mei. “Well, I regret to inform you that there will be more ramen at Ichiraku’s to come still.”

Kurama rolls his eyes, settling on his hind legs. 

Kakashi frowns, and then steps over, sitting down on the other side of Mei, who shoots him a quick grin, before her eyes search for Guy behind him, the grin growing warmer.

Kakashi can sense Guy rolling closer, halting behind them. 

 

Kushina claps her hands, sitting down between Naruto and Kakashi, hesitating for a moment before she speaks, after a quick look up and a nod by Kakashi. “This meeting… sorry, Shikaku, this picnic is, quite obviously, the beginning of a new era. Never before have bijou met up to…”

Shukaku interrupts, tone dark. “OF COURSE BIJOUS MET UP BEFORE. YOU JUST DIDN’T WANT TO REALIZE WE HAD SENSE BEYOND THE RAGE.”

Kushina blinks, and then quirks an eyebrow, sharing a quick look with Naruto, who sighs soundlessly. “True. And we used you.”

Kurama’s tails swish for a moment, and then he settles down, head on his crossed front paws. “YOU DID.”

Naruto speaks up, tone very calm and collected. “And yet, with this, today, we are entering a new era. One where we speak to each other, instead of hating each other.” He leans left, just a bit, bumping gently into Kurama. “Right?”

Kurama huffs, tone grumpy. “I GUESS.”

Naruto rolls his eyes, and then reaches out, scratching vigorously along Kurama’s back. “Oh come on, you love being out, don’t pretend otherwise?”

Kakashi blinks, watching in almost transfixed fascination as Kurama leans into the scratches for a long moment, before he settles again, with another huff. “SO WHAT’S TO EAT?”

Naruto snickers, scratching him between the ears. Leaning in, eyebrows waggling. “Lots.”

He grins up at Kakashi, blue eyes burning, and Kakashi cannot help himself, he grins, too. 

 

Mei speaks up, reaching forward to pull out containers with food from the basket. “Let me.” She leans towards Shikaku just slightly, winking at him. “We are an illustrious round today, are we not.” She starts to distribute the small bowls, filled to the brim with dozens of delicious-looking dishes, all bite-sized. “Three kages, two Uzumakis, two bijous… three red-heads.” She grins, and then adds, voice soft. “And the red beast of Konoha, the only one to survive the eighth gate…” 

Kakashi grins to himself for a moment, and then quirks an eyebrow, letting the gentle humor color his voice. “As you said, an illustrious circle.”

Naruto hums, reaching out to offer Kurama some kind of meats in sauce. “See. You’re not the red beast here.”

Kurama blinks up at Naruto, and then rolls his eyes, again. While taking the offered food, licking his snout, after. 

Shukaku grunts. “I’VE MISSED BEING OUT, TOO.”

Gaara tilts his head, voice careful. “I used to suppress you, viciously.”

Shukaku snorts. “YOU DIDN’T HAVE MUCH CHOICE. WE WEREN’T EXACTLY ON TALKING GROUNDS.”

Gaara nods, slowly. “And yet - I, as everyone else, accepted the status quo, instead of trying to find the truth for myself. We all were aware of the old stories after all.” Gaara quirks his left eyebrow, the tattoo on his forehead wrinkling just the tiniest bit. “We chose to ignore the signs, because it was easier. Because it fit, with what we were taught.”

Kakashi hums, his thoughts on Obito for a moment. “The way to hell is paved with good intentions.”

Gaara blinks up to him, voice firm. “Yes.” He blinks again, his gaze returning to Shukaku’s. “Nothing good can possibly come from forcing our will on anyone else.” He frowns. “As soon as we force a sentient being… then our own intent, our own reasoning for this force becomes tainted, wrong.” Gaara inhales, deeply. “Freedom can only come with respect for another’s autonomy. Bodily and otherwise. Restricting that autonomy, by whatever supposedly good intent… inverts said intent.” Gaara ducks his head. “For centuries, we have accepted that in order to be… to feel safe, we have to subjugate you. Force our will onto yours.” He grimaces. “Ultimately, we only hurt ourselves with it.” He lifts his eyebrows for a moment. “Fed your… valid rage.”

Kakashi swallows.

Kurama looks up at Naruto for a long moment. “YOU DID NOT LIKE THAT. YUGITO DIDN’T EITHER.” Kurama turns his head to look at Shukaku. “AND YOU ARE WELL AWARE THAT GAARA DID NOT LIKE IT EITHER.”

Kakashi blinks, shooting a look at Kushina, who stares at Kurama, with a bit of a remote expression on her face.

She seems to quote. “Tailed beasts do not feel like we do. They must be controlled, for their power is beyond their control.” She presses her lips together, for a long moment. “I…” She grimaces. “The adamantite chains of the Uzumaki clans are a jutsu that was extremely valued.” She clicks her tongue. “And feared.” She sighs. “As were the fuinjutsus.” She licks her lips, gaze faraway. “I did not doubt Mito-san after the Uzumaki were destroyed. I didn’t question her. I should have.”

 

Silence, for a long moment.

 

A bee buzzes through the air, inspecting the dishes and then heading for a few wild flowers close to the foliage, the soft breeze making the paper napkins rustle.

 

The weight of history makes it hard to breathe.

 

 

Eventually Kurama speaks up again. “WE CANNOT CHANGE THE PAST. BUT WE CAN CHANGE THE FUTURE.” Kurama’s head turns towards Kakashi, the red eyes narrowed. “MY JINCHURIKI’S SOUL-MATE HAS FOUGHT FOR NARUTO’S AGENCY EVERY STEP OF THE WAY.” Kakashi blinks, silently. He can see Kushina smirk, softly, proudly, from the corner of his eyes.

Kurama continues, with a yawn. “IF NOTHING ELSE, IT’S MADE ME BELIEVE IN HIM.”

 

Kakashi inclines his head, feeling rather unmoored.

Naruto smiles, a bit wobbly.

 

Kushina nods, with a sniff. “Yes.” She shakes her head once. “As you should.” She lifts her eyebrows, addressing Shukaku. “And you, do you believe in Gaara, too?”

Shukaku huffs, stuffing small rice puffs into his mouth, the words jumbled around them. “I REMEMBER.” He hesitates, and then grumbles, with a sidelong glance at Gaara. “I’M SORRY I TOOK SO MANY OF YOUR NIGHTS… YOU ARE EXTRAORDINARILY RESILIENT, TO HAVE BEEN ABLE TO NOT SLEEP FOR THOSE LONG PERIODS.”

Gaara raises his eyebrows, the green eyes searching the blue sky for a moment. “I was afraid.” He lowers his gaze once more, to lock it with Shukaku’s. “I’m not afraid anymore.” He lifts his head. “It would be my honor… our honor, if you would choose to visit us in Sunagakure.”

Shukaku grumbles a bit, but shrugs eventually, tone surprisingly careful. “I WOULD LOVE TO SEE THE LAND OF WIND AGAIN.”

Gaara nods, and then leans forward, to pull out more of the rice balls Shukaku seems to like so much. “Anytime.”

 

Kakashi watches Shukaku munch for a moment, and then picks up a small onigiri, too. 

He frowns. “Is it really that easy?”

Kurama scoffs. “NOTHING ABOUT THIS IS EASY. IT’S A LEAP OF FAITH FOR ALL OF US.”

Mei hums, weighing her head. “A leap of faith that should be put into law.”

Kakashi frowns, shooting her a look. “That sounds like you have reason for it?”

Mei sighs softly, with a small smirk. “I’m going to step down. So it would be wise if we would just… codify the bijou status?” She winks at Kakashi. “At least I can be here then without searching desperately for excuses.”

Kakashi snorts, and then turns his head, to look at Guy. Who grins at him, silent tears on his face. Kakashi echoes the grin, so utterly relieved and warm he cannot breathe.

He clicks his tongue, forcing himself to continue. “Well, you will be always welcome here.” He sobers, just a bit. “You’re going to give the hat to Chōjūrō?”

Mei nods, picking up some fried rice in a small bowl and giving it to Guy. “Yes. He has matured, and he is wielding Hiramekarei, as you know. He will be accepted.”

Gaara speaks up, with a shrug. “As far as I know Onoki will give the hat to his granddaughter, too.”

Kushina hums. “Young kages, for the future.”

Kakashi snorts, weighing his head. “Yeah, well…”

Shukaku interjects, tone bitingly sarcastic. “FOR US, YOU’RE ALL INFANTS.”

Kurama cackles, viciously. “YEP. WHICH MADE BEING SUBJUGATED BY YOU GUYS EVEN MORE… FUN.”

Kushina grimaces, munching on a few nuts and fruits.

 

Kakashi exhales, reaching up to rub his forehead. “Maybe we should make this a regular occurrence.” He shoots a quick look at Kurama, and then and Shukaku. “What do you think? We could ask the others, too?”

Kurama grunts. “MOST OF THE OTHERS ARE NOT INTERESTED. ONLY WE…” He trails off. 

Naruto prompts, gently. “Only you…?”

Kurama blinks up to him, and then rolls his eyes again. “ONLY WE LIKE OUR JINCHURIKIS ENOUGH TO WANT TO RETURN.”

There is a brief silence, and then an ‘oof’ by Kurama, as Naruto picks him up and squeezes him, within an inch of his life. With a loud, and exuberant: “Love you too, you silly fox!!”

Kakashi hides his snort in a cough, seeing Mei reach back to squeeze Guy’s hand from the corner of his eyes. 

He watches as Kurama tries to squirm free, and then gives up, sticking out of Naruto’s tight embrace like a bedraggled cat.

Gaara leans down to Shukaku, who points a claw. “DON’T YOU DARE.”

Kushina snickers, hiding her face in her hands. 

Naruto coos at Kurama, and then scratches him between the ears again, like a cat, ignoring the indignant look he gets. Grinning, broadly. “Wanna go for a run later?”

Kurama sighs, loudly, and then finally wriggles free, hopping out of Naruto’s arms with all tails swishing wildly. Hissing. “MAYBE.”

Naruto giggles.

 

Kurama glowers, and then winks at Kakashi. “WE SHOULD GET YOUR PACK, TOO.”

“Mhhhh….” Kakashi tilts his head, and then shrugs. “Maybe?” He can see Kurama grin. 

Shukaku leans back, looking mightily satisfied, and stuffed. “I’M NOT GOING FOR A RUN. I’M GOING FOR A NAP.”

Gaara snorts, ducking his head, the green eyes sparkling, tone carefully teasing. “Now you’re sleeping voluntarily?”

Naruto snickers. 

Shukaku grunts, and then nods, with a sidelong glance, tone definitely carrying amusement. “ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT I DESERVED THAT.” He hesitates. “ISN’T IT WEIRD THOUGH, THAT BOTH YOUR AND NARUTO’S PAST WAS SO SIMILAR… AND NOW THE ONES WE LIKE ARE… YOU?”

Gaara blinks slowly.

He quirks an eyebrow. “I believe our similar past is what drew us to each other back then. It is why Naruto was able to reach me.” Gaara looks up, finding Naruto’s eyes. “I still see my own reflection in that huge toad’s sword, mixed with your face… I remember you crawling to me on your chin.”

Kakashi frowns, looking at Naruto, who is smiling a bit painfully at Gaara, and shrugs. “Right… the fight after the chunin exams. That was the first time I transformed into a fox with Gamabunta…” He shoots a look at Kurama. “Even then I knew how you looked, at least subconsciously.”

Kurama looks up, snout smeared with frosting from some kind of dessert dish. 

Kakashi ducks his head to hide his twinge of amusement. 

Kurama shrugs. “SOME OF MY CHARACTERISTICS ARE IN YOU, SINCE YOU ARE JINCHURIKI DESCENDANT. AND OF COURSE…” He trails off, looking to the side with a huff.

Kushina leans forward, onigiri in one hand, reaching out to place her other hand onto Kurama’s shoulder. Prompting, gently. “And of course?”

Kurama snarls for a moment, but Kakashi has the distinct impression that it’s not aggression, more annoyance. His voice is gruff. “AND OF COURSE I USED TO CUDDLE WITH HIM, IN HIS CONSCIOUSNESS. OR, BETTER, SINCE I WAS IMPRISONED… I CONJURED AN IMAGE THAT CUDDLED WITH HIM.” 

 

Silence. 

 

Kakashi stares.

 

Kurama’s eyes find his, slowly. Continuing after a moment. “IN THE NIGHTS THAT YOU COULD NOT COME.”

Kakashi blinks rapidly, trying to contain the sudden flood of emotion, his world blurry. 

Kurama’s tails swish, rapidly, for a second. “I CAME UNTIL HE WAS OLD ENOUGHT TO RECOGNIZE ME.” Kurama shoots a look at Naruto, who watches him, solemnly. “THEN I ONLY CAME SOMETIMES, DURING THE NIGHTMARES.” Kurama huffs, with another small snarl. “THEY GOT BETTER AFTER THAT STUPID PLUSH VERSION OF KAKASHI SHOWED UP. I PRETENDED I LIKED THAT THEY STOPPED, BUT…”

Naruto sniffs.

Kushina asks after a moment, tone carefully unobtrusive and drenched in amusement. “Plush… version?”

Kakashi snorts, gently, reaching up to wipe his eyes. His eyes find Naruto’s after, sharing a long look. His voice breaks a bit, on the words, watching their impact, tears falling down Naruto’s face. “Jiraiya’s idea.” He snorts again, a bit more real this time. “He amused himself mightily with it. I don’t know where he got it.” He hesitates, drowning in the dark and swirling depths of Naruto’s blue eyes for a long moment. His words are a whisper. “But I know it helped you.” Kakashi swallows. “It and the others.”

Naruto closes his eyes, severing the connection, and rubs his face with his hands.” Yeah, the Sasuke doll came by package as well.”

Kakashi shakes his head slowly, not even mad. “Of course it did.” You always knew, didn’t you. He nods, and then looks at Kurama, with a deep inhale. Stating, simply. “Thank you.” For everything. Despite everything.

Kurama grimaces, looking away, and Kakashi smirks to himself, wryly, with warmth, another piece of the puzzle clicking into place. You, too, could not help but love him. And you fought it, too. 

 

Kushina sniffs, and then exhales, lifting her own tear-streaked face to the skies for long moments. “And now, here we are. With the wounds healing, finally.” She lowers her head again, her gaze gliding over Naruto and Kurama, and then settling on Shukaku, with a quick look up at Gaara. “Do you want to give Gaara a hug, too?”

Shukaku sputters, but Gaara just blinks, and Shukaku falls silent after a moment, looking mightily… grumpy. And somehow, despite everything, in desperate need of a hug.

Kushina winks at Gaara.

 

The moment Gaara bends down once more to indeed hug Shukaku to himself this time… a sound leaves Shukaku, a sound that makes Naruto laugh out loud, helplessly, painfully, and that makes Mei gasp. That goes through Kakashi’s mark and bone, and that speaks of decades of loneliness and hatred, and pain. 

 

Guy’s voice is loud in the sudden silence, in the emotional turmoil that is like a whirlwind, in all their hearts. “And so, my friends, the powers of love and youth and beauty win once more. Led by forgiveness and the strengths of our convictions, there can never be enough love.”

 

Kakashi blinks, and then watches Mei lean up, and Guy lean down, and the kiss is soft and short and gentle, and the world blurs once more, Kakashi’s heart hurting, beautifully. 

 

Naruto pulls up his nose, noisily, with a gasped laugh. “No. There can never be enough love.”

His eyes find Kakashi’s, the smile on his face beatific.

 

 

Kurama sniffs, and then pushes his snout back into the desserts with frosting, the nine tails swishing excitedly once more.

 

And Gaara’s eyes are red, rimmed in black, his tears like diamonds, that sparkle in the sun.

 

Hugging his bijou.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi wanders over to them, later, when Naruto is finally quiet again, helping his Mom clean up, after having talked their ears off, about all the other bijous, and the fights he used to have with Kurama, and his discussions with Son Goku.

 

When the sun is already low, golden, turning slowly red.

 

Temari watches him come, sitting high up in a branch of a tree, one leg swinging, while Kankuro leans against the trunk.

 

Kakashi lifts his head. “You know, there was enough food… is enough food still. If you’re hungry?”

 

Kankuro smirks, shaking his head once. “No, that’s fine, thank you Rokudaime-sama. We think…” He shoots a look up at Temari, who nods. “We think this was something Gaara needed without us.”

Kakashi hums, hands in his pockets. “But you were here, nonetheless.”

Temari shrugs. “We wanted to support him… and… see.”

Kakashi nods, quirking an eyebrow with a quick look back at the scene a ways off. “They don’t look like much in this form, do they.”

Kankuro snorts, watching as Shukaku seems to hop around on the blanket, seemingly showing some kind of pattern while Kurama watches, stretched out like a cat. “Nope.”

Temari pulls a face, with a click of her tongue. “We used to be so terrified…”

Kankuro hums, eyes faraway. “He used to be so volatile.”

Kakashi nods, remembering the path of death Gaara used to leave behind, then. 

He sighs. “Kurama destroyed Konoha, only a few years back. It’s truly astonishing to be here, now.” He quirks an eyebrow, looking up to lock his gaze with Temari’s teal one. “And scary.” He hesitates, and then prompts. “And… something to be controlled?”

Temari ducks her head, and then grins, for a moment. “Just… monitored.” She smirks at him. “Very astute.”

Kakashi shakes his head once. “Even back then you were the ones who had to have an eye out for Gaara.” He snorts. “It’s a too convenient tool for any council to just give up on.”

Kankuro snorts. “True.” He sighs, and then shrugs. “The council is a bit afraid that Konoha will be too powerful with the nine-tails and Naruto and Sasuke and… Kaguya, while we have only the one-tails.”

Kakashi grunts. “I don’t think we have the bijous anymore… don’t they know that the direct control is gone? Also… isn’t that how it was, before?” And we really cannot do much about who lives here now.

Kankuro grimaces, shuffling his feet a bit. “Well, it’s old thinking.”

Temari pats her pouch. “I took a photo. If it is as… cute as the moment looked to me when I took it, it should help them understand that the situation has changed, irreversibly.”

Kakashi ducks his head, with a grin. “Send it to me, too?” He winks at her. “I bet Naruto would love to have it.”

Temari grins. “Sure.” She inhales deeply, watching the sun set for a moment. “Are we still on for the meeting regarding the train lines?”

Kakashi nods, crossing his arms. “As far as I am aware? Shizune and Shikamaru are planning the meetings now, but I think it is on the schedule.”

Kankuro hums. “Good.” His dark eyes find Kakashi’s. “I’ve heard rumors that you think about combined military forces.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “I am. Not right away, maybe, though we just had a very successful… first try?” He shrugs. “But we should tear the walls between our countries down. I would rather not have a fifth war, at any point.”

Temari nods, and then clears her throat. “What if they come and want one though?”

Kakashi exhales, and then lifts his eyebrows. “If they come and attack us… we will defend ourselves.” He clicks his tongue. “That’s a bit different to a war though, isn’t it?”

Kankuro clicks his tongue, too. “It is.”

Kakashi nods, and then turns away a bit, but hesitates, with a look back over his shoulder. “I will need to return soon, I have another meeting. Should I send Shikamaru somewhere? Here, maybe?”

Temari ducks her head, fidgeting, while Kankuro grins. 

She quirks an eyebrow after a moment, deflecting a bit. “I’m glad you told him he didn’t have to wear the old robes of the aides anymore.”

Kakashi cackles, shaking his head. Whispering. “Can you imagine though? Shikamaru in those robes?”

Kankuro snorts, shaking his head, too. “Nope.” He sniffs, and then nods at Kakashi. “You’re not wearing those all the time either. Just like all the other kages do.” Kankuro sobers, tilting his head. “I remember the Sandaime did.”

Kakashi nods, carefully keeping any emotional reaction in check. “Yes. And the Yondaime always wore the white coat…” He shrugs. “But times are different. I doubt I would even need the letters on my back. I’ve been told I’m pretty recognizable.”

Temari grins at him. “That you are, Hatake Kakashi.” She waggles her eyebrows. “You and your father are legends in Sunagakure.”

Kakashi grunts, the lack of pain at the mention of his father a rush of relief. “Yeah, I remember Chiyoh.” He hesitates, and then bows, playfully. “But I really have to go now. Do come by before you leave again?”

Kankuro nods. “We will.”

Kakashi nods, starting back to the picnic area, waving a hand. “And do come over later. There’s so many leftovers?”

Temari hums, swinging her leg. “We will.” She hesitates, her voice soft. “Thank you, Rokudaime.”

 

Kakashi sends her an eye-smile, back over his shoulder, her grin following him all the way back to where Kushina is sitting now, softly running her fingers through Kurama’s fur.

Kakashi swallows, and then steps around them and over to the others, not interrupting, his heart giving a painful little thud when Naruto’s eyes snap up, with a pulse of his tattoo. 

He nods. “I will need to go now. Please enjoy your evening.” He turns to Shukaku, with a quick look back at Kurama, who watches with slitted eyes. “Thank you for coming.” He hesitates. “I know this sounds practiced, but I mean it, from the bottoms of all the hears of this Village’s peoples.” He smirks softly. “And beyond.”

Shukaku nods, and then sighs, looking up at Gaara for a moment. “I HOPE WE CAN DO THIS AGAIN.”

Gaara nods, too, tone soft. “So do I.” He looks up at Naruto. “Guess we’ll have to visit you again.”

Naruto whines, in a very put on way. “Oh noooo.”

Mei snickers.

Kakashi shoots her a look, watching her cross her legs while sitting sideways on Guy’s lap, arms around his shoulders, Guy’s head leaning against hers.

Mei winks at him and Kakashi swallows past the sudden constriction in his throat, blinking tears away. 

He nods. “Please do.” His eyes find Mei’s for a moment, too, and she inclines her head, with a small smirk. 

Kakashi exhales, turning to Naruto. “I need to go now.” He hesitates, with a frown. “Thank you for…” He trails off, and then shrugs, with a grin.

Naruto smirks, and then steps up, gliding into his embrace, lips pressing on the clothed skin under Kakashi’s jaw for a long moment, while his hands press into Kakashi’s back. 

Whispering. “Anytime.”

Kakashi nods, only realizing he’s holding fast and threading his fingers through golden hair when Naruto tries to withdraw again after a moment.

Kakashi clears his throat, unable to stop himself from inhaling deeply when Naruto withdraws, the warmth of him mixing intoxicatingly with his sheer presence. Kakashi wants to run his tongue over the small dimple in Naruto’s cheek. 

 

Now.

 

He clears his throat again, suddenly aware he is staring, and then steps back, with a quick nod.

His voice is scratchy. “See you…” He trails off, not knowing how to finish the sentence.

Naruto bites his lips, and then leans in. “Later?”

Kakashi’s eyes find his, the thrum delicious. He nods silently. 

Naruto nods, too, eyes sparkling, and then steps back, separating them, making them both shiver.

 

Kakashi steps back, and then swallows, turning back towards the path.

 

 

 

 

 

And arrives at the tower, with a grin on his face. 

 

And… no recollection of the trip, his mind suffused in the echo of that kiss under his jaw and anticipation.

 

He clicks his tongue, entering the tower, weighing his head. This is what Orochimaru meant. And it’s still sedate for me. 

 

For… us. 

 

How will it be if we actually… touch?

 

 

He hesitates in the hallway in front of his office, staring at himself in the fuzzy reflection of a glass frame.

 

It’s no wonder that the other couples that formed get serious so soon. 

 

It’s beyond addictive.

 

And… true. 

 

 

He frowns, watching the line that forms on his forehead. 

Fate awards us with confirmation, takes the burden of responsibility.

 

He blinks. Saying the words out loud. “It’s a gift of trust.”

 

Trust that this will work. That it will hold. That it is reciprocated. That it is wanted. 

He sighs, silently amending. At least now.

 

 

There’s a whisper of cloth and Sakura joins him, green eyes meeting his in the reflection. Her tone is soft. “Sensei?”

Kakashi blinks, and then turns his head to her, to lock their gazes properly. “I was just…” He shakes his head. “I just realized that for all the pain and the heartache… I could trust fate now.” He swallows, noisily. “Him.”

Sakura tilts her head, and then a slow grin spreads, with a small blush. “Yeah. And isn’t that awesome?”

Kakashi snorts, and then nods, a bit wildly. “It is.”

He inhales deeply, and then shoots her a look. “Looking forward to the academy starting next month?”

Sakura grins, broadly. “Oh yes. We already met up with the kids that are entering, they are soooo cute.” She chuckles, eyebrows rising. “We never were that small, were we.”

Kakashi cackles, and then leans in, eyebrows waggling, echoing. “You were beyond cute.”

Sakura closes her eyes, snickering. She shakes her head. “It seems so far away.”

Kakashi hums, silently. It does.

Sakura smirks, eyes faraway. “I’m glad Itachi is teaching as well, at least from time to time. It has already helped a lot with his acceptance in the village that some of the kids are really excited about that.”

Kakashi hums. “I bet.” He hesitates, shooting her a look. “So how are your plans coming along?”

Sakura blushes a bit. “In regards to the wedding?”

Kakashi nods. 

She shrugs. “Good, I guess? My parents are ecstatic. Naruto is annoying.”

Kakashi blinks, somewhat irritated by the shift. “He is annoying?”

Sakura shoots Kakashi a deadpan look. “You do remember him at Sensei Yamato’s wedding, don’t you. And I was stupid enough to ask him to help me.”

“Oh.” Kakashi grimace. “Yeah, I can imagine.” He bumps into her shoulder, just softly. “He only means well though.”

Sakura rolls her eyes. “Yeah, still, I could just hit him sometimes…”

Kakashi grins, remembering various instances of that through the years.

He leans in. “Yeah, about that… please don’t do that anymore. He’ll need his remaining brain cells.”

Sakura snorts, ducking her head.

Kakashi leans in, whispering. “And, all things considered… That will be my job from now on.”

Sakura blinks, and then leans in, whispering as well, tone dripping with amusement. “But mine wasn’t foreplay.”

Kakashi snaps back, eyes wide, while she snickers, and then clears his throat, crossing his arms. “I’ll have you know that we’re definitely not…”

Sakura waggles her eyebrows, interjecting. “Not yet.”

Kakashi grunts, feeling as red as a tomato.

 

A clock chimes softly and Kakashi sighs, reaching up to place his hand on her shoulder for a moment. “Well. Glad to know you and Itachi have all that figured out apparently.”

It’s Sakura’s turn to blush, heavily. 

Kakashi winks at her, stepping around her and throwing the words back over his shoulder. “Two can play the game, Sakura-chan.”

 

There is a pause, and then Sakura hollers after him, defiantly loud. “Or three? Or four?”

 

Kakashi snickers, opening the door to his office, her laughter following him into a planning meeting about corn fields and the expansion of the outskirts.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“There you are.”

Naruto spreads his arms, silently, and Kakashi steps into them, without thinking, hugging Naruto, the reality of him brilliantly addictive.

He pushes his clothed nose along a whisker on Naruto’s right cheek, shivering. “Sorry, the meeting took longer than I thought.”

Naruto hums, leaning back against one of the tufts of Minato’s stone head with him, hands stroking over Kakashi’s back.

Who sighs, softly. “Where’s Sasuke?”

Naruto sighs, soundlessly, but only tightens the embrace. “Waiting.”

Kakashi lifts his head, just a bit. “He knows?”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, and then ducks his head. “Yes.”

Kakashi frowns, and then sighs, deeply, his heart aching for Sasuke. 

 

Naruto swallows. “I’m glad he’ll be on a mission soon. I hope…” He trails off. 

Kakashi grimaces and then nods. “Yeah, me too.” He shakes his head once. “For him.” It’s getting harder and harder to resist. We are both just… He swallows.

Naruto’s eyes flutter shut, leaning in to press his temple against Kakashi’s. “Yeah.”

Kakashi inhales, deeply, eyes unfocused on the fine golden hairs that dust Naruto’s skin. High on the smell of it. Voice shivering. “You need to go back to him.”

Naruto hums, squeezing him tightly for a moment. “And I will?” He clicks his tongue. “In a moment.”

Kakashi nods, working through the instinctual pain that is nonetheless not even close to what it was, once upon a time, deflecting a bit. “Today was good.”

Naruto chuckles, softly, the vague stubble scratching over Kakashi’s mask, making a vague rasping sound. “It was.”

Kakashi grins, rubbing his head over Naruto’s, softly, making more of that sound. “How is Kurama now?”

Naruto hesitates, and then snorts, humor clear in his voice. “I’m supposed to tell you that that is none of your business.”

Kakashi pouts, letting it color his voice. “Ah damn, and here I thought Kurama liked me.”

Naruto grins, ducking his head to press his face against Kakashi’s throat. 

Mumbling against it. “He does.” He snorts again, shoulders shaking, but doesn’t add anything else and Kakashi grins, imagining Kurama’s reaction, while trying to ignore how hot breath tickles him.

He hums. “I’m going to spar a bit with Minato tomorrow. Wanna come, too?”

Naruto heaves a sigh, and then withdraws a bit, shaking his head. “Academy year planning meeting tomorrow with Sensei Iruka and Anko. Who would hunt me down and drag me back by my ear, as you know. So I can’t, sorry.”

Kakashi nods, with a hum. “Alright.” He smirks. “Guess I’ll just have to do with your Dad then.”

Naruto’s eyes snap up, burning, and Kakashi grins, leaning in to ghost his nose over Naruto’s, for just a moment. Still a bit jealous?

Naruto harrumphs, and then quirks an eyebrow, with a shake of his head. “Meet up here again tomorrow?”

Kakashi reaches up, feathering his thumb over the lashes of Naruto’s left eye, delighting in the spreading blush.

Leaning in with a whisper, breathing the words against Naruto’s lips. “Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

 

He reaches, watching Naruto’s pupils dilate, knowing his own are as well, and he knows if he were to tilt his head now, and lean in…

 

Naruto gasps, shudderingly, in his arms and then leans back the tiniest bit, eyes dark. 

Whispering. “Not yet.”

 

 

Kakashi breathes in, deeply, deliberately, watching Naruto’s pupils dilate further.

 

Rumbling the words.

“Not yet.”

 

 

 

 

But soon.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 52: Hot summer nights

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

Kakashi grunts, the blow he managed to catch with his raised left arm shuddering through him.

Minato grins at him, panting. “Nice. Can you catch the next one, too?” He twirls, mid-jump, knee connecting with Kakashi’s upper left leg.

Kakashi grunts, his leg giving away, and he hurls himself back, throwing his leg… and landing a truly spectacular kick on Minato’s chin in the process.

 

Minato’s head snaps back, with a very satisfying, scrunchy sound, the bitten-off moan that leaves his mouth prompting Kakashi to just stay on the ground, panting heavily, instead of getting back up again.

Minato drops to the ground and crawls over to him, flopping down onto his back, mumbling around his hands holding his jaw. “Again. Nice one.”

Kakashi snorts, shooting him a look and wincing a bit. “Yeah, sorry.”

Minato snorts, too, and then hisses, shaking his head a bit. “My own fault. I insisted on pushing you.” He grunts, removing one hand and working his jaw a bit, tone very dry. “And I’ll have a wonderful bruise to show off now… Kushina gets really... protective when I come home with injuries you know.”

Kakashi blinks, narrowing his eyes at him, while still trying to get enough oxygen. “Protective?”

Minato turns his head, waggles his eyebrows. Silently.

Kakashi blushes, heavily. 

Minato chuckles. “So, I heard you are meeting up regularly with him on my stone head?” He grins at Kakashi, in a decidedly lewd way. “At least that thing is good for… something.”

Kakashi grunts, sending him a bit of a withering look, his breathing calming down again finally. “Not like that.”

Minato hums, pulling a face. “Shame.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes.

 

Minato clicks his tongue, dropping his other hand from his jaw as well, the bruise indeed quite prominent already. “Still. It’s shifted a bit already, hasn’t it.”

Kakashi swallows, remembering. “Yeah.” It has. 

He can feel Minato’s gaze. Minato’s voice is a whisper. “Let it happen.”

Kakashi frowns, turning his head to look at Minato properly. “Let it happen? I thought I was?”

Minato smiles, broadly, and then turns on his side, blue eyes flashing, the wet blonde hair sticking to his scalp. “No, what I meant is… let yourself fall in love.” He leans in, eyes glittering. “Let the rush come.” He lifts a finger, poking Kakashi in the chest. “I know you resist it still.”

Kakashi grunts. “Sasuke is still very much here, you know.”

Minato hums. Silently.

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “What are you not telling me.”

Minato grimaces, and then shrugs, laying back down again. “Nothing, really.” 

Kakashi swallows, eyes unseeing on the sky. “I know they’ve been going through some problems.”

Minato sighs soundlessly, and then clicks his tongue. “Do you really think Sasuke would have accepted solo missions in this kind of situation if he wasn’t yearning for his own bond?”

Kakashi grimaces, voice a whisper. “He loves Naruto.”

Minato shakes his head. “And he will always love Naruto. That’s not the point.”

 

Kakashi fidgets, with a grimace.

Minato quirks an eyebrow, with a sidelong gaze. “I see there’s still energy to be spent in you. Another round?”

Kakashi grunts. “Sure.”

Minato nods, and then pushes himself up with a grunt of his own. Holding out his hand to pull Kakashi up. “Do try to split my lip this time.” He waggles his eyebrows. 

Kakashi stares at the proffered hand, and then shakes his head, very slowly, tone very dry. “How could I ever take you for this pure, gentle, innocent teacher of mine, seriously, I must have been so blind.”

Minato snorts, shaking his head a bit, while pulling Kakashi up.

Patting Kakashi on the back. “Ah, no. You were just too innocent for it all, Kakashi.”

Kakashi frowns, staring at him. “And you weren’t?”

Minato smirks at him for a moment, and then leans in, tone very low. “You know, Rin and I used to joke that you and Obito should just… you know, ‘fuck and get it over with’, but of course that never happened.” He winks. “At least not then.”

Kakashi stares at him, mouth open. “But I thought Rin…”

Minato snorts, stepping back, and taking a defensive stance. “You said it yourself, Kakashi, a while back. Rin and I got along really well.” He winks again, and then grins, the wind ruffling his hair.

Kakashi shakes his head, slowly, while taking position himself. “And as I said… I was young, naive and quite obviously blind.”

Minato cackles. “We all were at some point.” He lifts his hands. “Now, try to hit me again.” 

Kakashi clicks his tongue, tone carefully suffused with humor. “It will be my pleasure to do everything in my power to… make your night, Sensei.”

Minato grins, waggling his eyebrows. Whispering. “You do realize I was Jiraiya’s pupil, don’t you.”

Kakashi blinks, and then hesitates, tone dripping with sarcasm, realizing something. “I can never read Icha Icha again.” I bet he put things about you into it, too.

Minato laughs, out loud, ending in a snicker. “You should continue the series.” He clicks his tongue. “Write a spin-off.”

Kakashi grunts, and then locks his muscles, preparing to jump forward. “I doubt I’ll ever have the time. Your son wants kids, you know.”

Minato waves with his left hand. “Oh, they grow. Free time will be back, eventually.” He beckons, with his other. “Stop buying time.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “Stop distracting me.”

Minato grins.

 

Kakashi lowers his stance, echoing it.

 

With a snarl.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“Oh my god, Sensei, let me heal you, just a mo….”

 

Kakashi holds up his hand, shaking his head. “No, thank you, Hinata-san. It is nothing, really.” He gives her a careful eye-smile, or at least as much as his swollen and probably purple eye allows. “I just sparred with my Sensei, who does not pull his punches…”, he blinks, and then adds with a shrug, and an amused realization, “anymore.”

Hinata blinks, and then relaxes, in increments, with a grimace. “Are you sure?”

Kakashi nods. “I’m sure.” He winks at her. “How else would I learn for next time?”

Hinata ducks her head, to hide her snort. She tilts her head towards the house after a moment. “Neji and Karin are inside. Would you like some tea?”

Kakashi inclines his head. “That would be lovely, thank you.”

 

He steps up the porch, toeing his toes off in the entrance, and then follows Hinata inside after she does the same, eyes adjusting slowly to the lower light inside.

There’s laughter off to the side, and Hinata turns towards it, pushing the sliding doors open without much ado.

She winks at Kakashi, before calling to the people in the small room. “Neji-kun, Karin-chan, look who’s here.”

“Rokudaime!” Neji pushes up, bowing his head, and Kakashi holds up his hand, nodding at Karin.

“Yo.” He hesitates, adding drily. “And no stress in regards to my bruises, I sparred with my Sensei.”

Karin snorts, tea in hand. “And he obviously made clear why he is your Sensei?”

Kakashi smirks, ignoring the twinge of pain that comes with the motion. “Yep.” Though I at least managed to give him a run for his money. 

Neji ducks his head, to hide his grin.

And then extends his hand, to offer a seat. “Please.”

Kakashi nods, and then settles, with a small grunt, waiting until Hinata is settled as well. 

He clicks his tongue, indicating Karin. “I see you’ve officially moved in?”

Karin lifts her head, in a small, a bit stubborn gesture that speaks volumes, but her gaze flickers to Neji for a moment, while she pushes at her glasses. “I have. There’s not much sense making a fuzz out of it. We are an item and we’ll stay it.”

Kakashi blinks, and then refuses to grin, carefully coloring his voice with sincerity only. “I’m glad.” He nods at Neji, but looks back at her. “I heard you plan to work with Orochimaru again, in the facility we’ve set up?”

Karin nods, while Neji fidgets. “Yes. I love my research. Orochimaru rescued me back then.” She weighs her head. “We get along. He leaves me to my business, while going after his.” She shrugs. “And, after all is said and done… he is a genius.”

Neji’s tone is hard. “And a war criminal.”

Karin levels him with an annoyed look, her tone beyond unnerved. “Again?”

Neji opens his mouth, but Kakashi holds up his hand, interjecting quietly. “I do appreciate it that you will work with him.”

Neji’s mouth snaps shut, silently, glowering at the tea in his hand.

Kakashi sighs soundlessly, quirking an eyebrow, but keeps his eyes on Karin’s red ones. “Orochimaru has promised us acquiescence. Just as you have.” He tilts his head. “However, your ties to this village have been strengthened, his…” He hesitates, eyes faraway for a moment. “His have never been fully severed.” He exhales. “I do not want you to spy on him, but I would like you to work with us.”

Karin frowns, deeply, tone flat. “And what does that mean.”

Kakashi shakes his head, and then shrugs. “There will be guards, outside. There will be visitors, scientific and otherwise. That’s inevitable, if there’s actually research done.”

He leans in a bit. “Orochimaru is always true to himself. I want you to make sure for us that he stays true to his word to us, also.”

Karin narrows her eyes. “Honor the agreement?”

Kakashi nods. “Yes. Keep visitors safe, exchange information. Be nice to the guards.” He shrugs again. “You know. Be civil.”

Karin ducks her head, a small grin flitting over her face. “Yeah, he’ll probably have his work cut out for him in regards to that one.”

Kakashi grunts. “Yes. The end may not justify the means anymore.” He looks over at Neji, catching his gaze. “I think Karin is vital there, actually. And we would carelessly underuse her skills if we wouldn’t let her continue her research.”

Neji blinks, and then looks away, for a long moment, with a frown.

Hinata pipes up, tone gentle. “It would send various good signals, Neji-kun. She represents change, and healing. And is a splendid role model.” 

Kakashi hums, lifting his eyebrows. “And send a gentle but important reminder to Orochimaru in the process.” He lifts his finger, looking back at Karin. “I do not expect you to go head to head with him if, somehow, push comes to shove.” He lowers his hand. “That’s what I and Naruto are for.”

Karin hums, and then grins. “Think you could take him?”

Kakashi smirks at her. “I went up against him before. And I’m still here?” Though I used to have the sharingan, then. 

Karin weighs her head, and then shares a long look with Neji, who is looking at her with an expression that is somewhere between stubborn, thoughtful and … sullen. She shrugs. “Very well.” She points her finger at Kakashi. “I’ll be your little spy, Rokudaime. But it has to be official that I’m your liaison. He’ll find out anyways and keeping it from him wouldn’t be good.”

Kakashi nods. “That’s fine. I’m rather sure he does not expect me to not have one?”

Karin snorts. "True.“

Kakashi nods, and then tilts his head towards Neji. "Thoughts?“

Neji‘s gaze comes up, slowly, and then he sighs. "Just that we live in complicated times…“ His eyes find Karin’s. "And nothing is as easy as we want it to be.“

Karin exhales, and then smirks at him, while linking his left hand with her right. "Right?“

 

Out of the corner of his eyes Kakashi can see Hinata grin, just softly. 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

"So. You and Tenten?“

 

Hinata blushes, furiously, but lifts her head even higher. "Yes.“

Kakashi grins at her. "That makes me happy.“ He winks at her. "And… you chose good… donors.“

Hinata colors, even more deeply, wringing her hands a bit, and Kakashi has the distinct impression she would have vanished on the spot if they weren’t in the middle of the street on the way back to the tower. 

Her voice is a bit pressed. "You don’t mind?“

Kakashi blinks, carefully examining his feelings on the matter for a moment. 

He shrugs, tone deliberately lofty. "No. More of Naruto is always a good thing in my, absolutely unbiased opinion.“

Hinata snickers. And then wrings her hands a bit more. "It’s just… they‘d be half-siblings. Genetically at least. I mean to your kids.“ She shoots him a look, bravely pushing on, despite being as red as a tomato now. "I mean, we made a deal that when we… you know… we would extract some more eggs for you and him, and he said he could change the tissue and infuse it with his DNA so it would be your kids thanks to his new powers, but I mean it’s his DNA we need, so…“ She trails off. 

Kakashi clears his throat, with a frown. I see. "Couldn’t he do the same for you?“ He shakes his head, adding hastily. "Don’t misunderstand me, I do not mind in the slightest, I just…“

Hinata shrugs. "He said the egg would still need to be fertilized. He said he could change his by infusing his essence into the egg and changing it, but for the semen…“

Kakashi exhales. But they still need the fertilization process?

He nods. "I see.“ He shoots her a look. "How do you feel about that?"

Hinata ducks her head. "It’s… Naruto, you know? We may not be destined to be together, but…“

Kakashi snorts, and then reaches out and hugs her, with one arm, for a moment. "Yeah, I get it.“ He looks at her. "So. Looks like we’ll be family… at some point.“

Hinata snickers, softly, obviously relieved. "Apparently.“

Kakashi exhales, in a rush, and then shakes his head once, speaking the utter truth. “I like that.”

Hinata shivers, crossing her arms, her big eyes fixed on his. “You do?”

Kakashi frowns. “I… we destroyed your family back then.” He hesitates, his voice low now, watching the impact his words have, Hinata’s face carefully neutral. “I still think it was the right thing to do, and it has done you a world of good…” He inclines his head, his eyes searching hers. “But the fact remains.” He clicks his tongue, adding some humor to his tone. “So it’s only fair if I… if we help you rebuild it.”

Hinata’s big eyes fill with tears and she blinks them away, hastily, averting her gaze for a long moment. She nods, mutely. 

 

They are silent for a moment, and then Hinata speaks up again, tone low. “Tenten is still mourning that fan… she wants to open a weapon’s shop. Given her skills I think it is a good idea, even if I hope that we… won’t need it.”

Kakashi hums. “I do hope so, too. And you are right, her skills are perfect for it.” He frowns, with a shake of his head. “What was that fan? I mean, I only ever heard of it, since I wasn’t at the beach.”

Hinata shrugs. “The Bashōsen, one of the tools the Sage of the Six paths supposedly wielded. The Raikage took them back to Kumogakure.”

Kakashi nods, slowly. “But they cannot wield them, can they?” He hesitates. “If I remember, only those with extremely large chakra reserves could use them.”

Hinata nods. “That’s why he took it, and the other two, the Benihisago and the Kōkinjō. He said it was like an addiction to use them and that she had to fight the withdrawal.”

Kakashi frowns, making a mental note to speak with Ay. “I see.” But maybe it would be good to have them here… where the only person to actually able to wield them is. He exhales, with a shrug. “I’m sorry she’s having a hard time with it.”

Hinata waves her hand. “Oh it’s alright. It is giving her new ideas, so who knows what good it’ll bring.”

Kakashi nods. “We’re setting up the research centers now… maybe she could work with them.” He shoots Hinata a look. “I’ll talk to her.”

Hinata ducks her head, with a smile. “That would be lovely.”

Kakashi smirks, and then stops, looking up at the tower in the afternoon sunlight for a moment before addressing her once more. “Thank you for escorting me. I’m sure people would have come up and tried to drag me to the hospital if you hadn’t been with me.”

Hinata smirks, opening her mouth to reply, but hesitates, and Kakashi can see the veins around her eyes stand out for a split second, the Byakugan obviously active. “Oh.” Her expression clears into a broad grin, and she bows, just lightly, stepping back. “Rokudaime. I will just…“ She gesticulates and then moves away, hastily, with a snicker, and Kakashi frowns, not getting it, and then….

 

 

 

…. something golden and furious drops down in front of him.

 

Kakashi blinks, locking his gaze with burning crossed pupils, feeling the anger pour off of Naruto, like acid, in the air, bitter and heavy and sizzling.

He blinks again, lifting his hand up, just a bit, trying for levity. “Yo.”

Naruto hisses at him. “Who did this.”

Kakashi stares at him, and suddenly very aware of the state he’s in, his split lip, and swollen eye, the bruises on his cheek and temple. 

And white-hot… delight rushes through him, taking his breath. Huh. Looks like not only Kushina is extremely protective.

He tries to deflect, voice a whisper. “Naruto, it’s not wha…”

He cannot continue, because Naruto is there suddenly, arms around him, and then there’s a strong sense of vertigo as Naruto rushes up and onto Minato’s stone head with him, obviously flying, and then almost crushing him in between the granite tufts of hair. 

Kakashi swallows, still trying to get his bearings, the chakra flames licking at his skin, tickling him.

He lowers his voice. “Naruto, I’m fine.”

Naruto blinks, hand coming up to pull at his mask, while his other hand unclasps Kakashi’s armor. “You’re not, you’re hurt, I can sense…” He trails off, pushing the armor off, and then pulling up Kakashi’s shirt and Kakashi lets him, too stunned to stop him. 

Naruto lowers his gaze, staring at the big bruise on Kakashi’s lower abdomen.

Kakashi follows his gaze, and then finally snaps out of his stupor when Naruto reaches for his belt, catching Naruto’s wrist while feeling white-hot everywhere. “Naruto, stop.”

Naruto stops, literally, hovering there with a finger hooked into Kakashi’s belt, crossed pupils staring into space. Whispering. “You’re hurt.”

Kakashi blinks, and then lets the wrist go, lifting his hand and pushing it onto Naruto’s neck, and then up into the hair at the back of Naruto’s head, threading and kneading, while his other holds onto Naruto’s upper arm. His tattoo burns.

He forces himself to repeat, gently. “I’m fine. Your Dad sparred with me.”

Naruto’s eyes snap up, with a snarl. “My Dad did this?”

Kakashi blinks, and then pushes in, carefully, pressing their foreheads together. “Easy, Naruto. I’m only wearing the proof that he didn’t pull his punches with me anymore.”

Naruto scoffs, the hand between their bodies twitching. “He split your lip.” Fangs glint, for a moment. “That bruise is deep, just a bit more force and…”

Kakashi hums, trying to ignore how Naruto’s hand glides up now, feathers along his abs, to no avail. Repeating, while silently cursing his bodily reactions, the fire that rushes through him. “I’m fine.” He clicks his tongue, carefully infusing his tone with gentle humor. “Though, if I knew you’d be this…” He tilts his head, to catch Naruto’s gaze, rumbling the word. “…possessive…”

Naruto shivers.

His fingertips burn on the skin over Kakashi’s heart. 

 

Naruto inhales, deeply, and then he blinks, very slowly, withdrawing just enough so he can properly lock eyes with Kakashi.

Stating. “You’re aroused.”

No shit. Kakashi’s throat clicks as he swallows, trying to keep his tone light. “Well, I was just manhandled, and almost stripped by my soul-mate, what can I say.”

Naruto’s eyes drop to Kakashi’s split lip, a weight in them that can be felt.

His voice seems far away. “I’m wondering how it would taste if I pushed my tongue over it. Into it. What sound you would make.”

 

Kakashi shivers, suddenly aware they’re spiraling out of control, and fast. 

 

And unable to make himself stop it.

 

Naruto moves forward, just a bit, presses his hips in. The chakra flames seem to smell now, of him, of them, of want.

Kakashi is getting light-headed, shivering with desire.

He swallows, and then tightens his fingers in Naruto’s hair, pulling, with all his strength. 

 

Intending to separate them a bit.

 

Like the good, reliable Hokage he is.

 

 

 

Naruto moans, loudly, while his head falls back, exposing his throat.

 

Kakashi wants to run his tongue over it so badly he can taste it.

 

Fuck.

 

Kakashi grunts, aware he’s leaking now, the air between them heating up.

Naruto bites his lips, the crossed pupils disappearing behind golden lids.

 

His words are breathless, body arched in Kakashi’s grip. “There’s lube in my pocket.”

 

Oh god.

 

Kakashi mewls, and then squeezes his eyes shut, shivering. 

 

Breath is fast now, panting, puffing against heated skin. 

Kakashi’s hands are sweaty.

 

He can smell Naruto now, a tangy, mouth-watering flavor mixing intoxicatingly with the prospect of having him, here, held up against the rocks, legs around Kakashi’s waist. 

 

Hard, and fast, and glorious.

 

Naruto’s mouth is open, eyes slitted.

Gasping the word. “Please.”

 

 

Kakashi gasps, snarling now, not recognizing his own voice. “We shouldn’t have our first time like this.”

Naruto undulates, like a cat, carefully not dislodging Kakashi’s grip, his clothed cock gliding along Kakashi’s, making them both moan. His fingernail scratches over Kakashi’s nipple and then down his chest, sending fire into his gut.

Naruto chuckles, voice gravelly. “Why? Isn’t it perfect? We’re in my Dad’s… head, and he made sure we would end up together after all?” 

Kakashi grunts, watching the Adam’s apple bop as Naruto swallows, and then licks his lips. Kakashi wonders if the lips are red now, under the gold. 

 

And how the chakra would taste, if it poured down his throat.

 

 

Naruto mewls, deep in his throat.

Kakashi wants to hear it again, right now.

 

Naruto shivers, mouth dropping open.

 

 

 

Sasuke speaks up, with the vicious equivalent of ice-cold water, pouring over them. “It’s not going to take long now, is it.”

 

Naruto stumbles back, the sudden loss of him intense, the gold flaring out, face flushed, and pupils huge and black. “Sasuke.”

Kakashi tries to breathe, shivering like a leaf, mind empty.

Aware how he must look.

 

Sasuke smirks sadly, stepping up slowly, and with a small chuckle. “You didn’t even sense me, all your senses trained on him.” He swallows, eyes gliding over Kakashi for a long moment, lingering on Kakashi’s crotch like a touch. “I don’t blame you.” He lifts his gaze to Kakashi’s, addressing him directly. “And I don’t blame you either.”

 

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut.

 

Sasuke continues, gentle, careful, merciless. “I had so many of Naruto’s firsts… the first kiss, the first… time, the first blow job… it’s just fair if I get the first betrayal, too.”

Naruto’s voice is pained. “Sasuke…”

Sasuke chuckles, with a shake of his head, but he doesn’t sound pissed, just exhausted. “This isn’t sustainable anymore.”

Kakashi reopens his eyes, gaze unseeing on Konoha. Is he…

Naruto gasps, tears running down his face. “No, Sasuke, I…”

Sasuke grimaces, and then steps up to Naruto, reaching up to push some hair from his forehead. “We’ll talk later, okay?” He shakes his head. “Here’s not the place. Nor the time.”

He shoots Kakashi a look, but addresses Naruto. “You should heal him. That is what you wanted to do, earlier, when you left, right? At least you said so?”

Naruto swallows, noisily. 

Sasuke nods at Kakashi. “Go ahead then.”

 

There is a pause, and then Naruto steps up, looking like crying, but he sniffs, golden-green chakra pouring from his hands. 

Kakashi blinks, somewhat stupidly, watching him, silently. 

Naruto’s fingers shake, while hovering over Kakashi’s split lip until it heals.

 

 

He steps back after, quietly.

 

 

There’s a soft breeze up here, but the air is not cool, the summer night hot.

 

 

Sasuke lifts his gaze to the stars.

And holds out his hand.

 

Naruto takes it, without another word. 

 

Sasuke lowers his gaze, his purple eyes finding Kakashi’s. “I’ll talk to you in a bit.”

Kakashi swallows, pressing the words out. “Are you sure?”

 

They both know what he means.

 

 

Sasuke smirks, a bit sadly, while squeezing Naruto’s hand. “Yeah. But Naruto and I deserve to…”  He trails off.

 

Kakashi swallows, his heart bleeding for him. He nods, whispering. “Yes. And so much more.”

 

 

Sasuke nods, and tugs on Naruto’s hand, and then they’re gone

 

 

 

 

Kakashi sinks down after a moment, slowly, his legs unable to support him, all the aches and pains of before gone, but his heart hurts now, terribly. 

 

 

And the hope and anticipation and excitement that flutter in his gut are terrible, and he hates them, and he cannot breathe, because it’s all so much, and he loves it, and he stares at his fingers, for hours, the memory of Naruto’s head in them, and the moan replaying over and over again…

 

…and the only thing keeping him from rushing after them.

 

The only thing that keeps him sane.

 

 

 

 

Because there’s a scratch on his chest from his claw that Naruto, obviously deliberately, didn’t heal.

 

 

And it’s burning.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Do you like them?”

 

“Mhhh?” Kakashi blinks up, with a frown.

Tsunade sends him a look. “The pictures.”

“Oh.” Kakashi ducks his head a bit, knowing she went to pains to find ones he would like. “Yes. I do. Very much.” He sends her a grateful look, very glad indeed that she chose to put up the white veil ones, the pictures tasteful and quite beautiful. “I’m sorry, I’m just…” Preoccupied.

Tsunade hums. Voice very careful. “No-one has really seen them for two days. I mean, they had the weekend off, still…”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, tone desperately light. “Yeah well, they probably just make the best of their time before academy starts tomorrow.”

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow, with another hum.

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “What.”

Tsunade shoots him a sideways look. “What happened?”

Kakashi grimaces, shuffling through the papers on her… his desk. “He came by to heal me after my training with Minato. It…” almost spiraled out of control “was kinda intense.”

Tsunade nods silently, and then shrugs. “It doesn’t exactly help that he’s a bag of hormones right now, and that you are in the middle of your literally best years, does it.”

Kakashi grunts, sending her a skunk-eye. Not dignifying that with an answer.

Tsunade snickers. “Oh come on, who will tease you all the time when I’m gone?”

Kakashi snorts, and then points his chin at the picture. “I think Minato will. And Kushina. Oh, and Obito and Iruka have been very bad lately, too.” He glowers at her. “You trained them so well.”

Tsunade grins at him. Silently.

 

Kakashi sighs. “So. You’re leaving tomorrow?”

Tsunade nods. “Yes. I’m going to come with you today to get Nagato’s machine… and then leave tomorrow morning with Suigetsu.” She shrugs. “It’s only a few days to Amegakure, but I’m going to take it slow, because I want to talk to Suigetsu a bit. Our previous talks have made it quite clear that he has a humor as sharp as his teeth and I… like that.” She grins. “Besides, I’ve waited so long to get my strength back and help you deal with the war’s… repercussions… I’m not going to waste it on the way.”

Kakashi nods. 

He shoots her a look. “Since we… don’t need the memorial anymore… you might want to take the paper flower bouquet with you. Put it on… her grave.”

Tsunade frowns. “Do you know where it is?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Not yet?”

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow as well, nodding. “Alright.” She waggles her eyebrows. “Want me to ask? Or do you want to?”

Kakashi waves his hand. “We’re meeting up for lunch. I’ll ask him.”

Tsunade smirks. “Alright.”

 

Kakashi echoes the smirk, and then lowers his voice a bit. “They’re really joined at the hip these days. And pretty happy. I…” He trails off, not knowing what to say.

Tsunade grins at him. “They heal each other.”

Kakashi swallows, mind returning to that first dinner, felt ages ago. “Yes.” 

He inhales deeply, shooting a look at the door. “So. Should we go and get the machine?”

Tsunade nods, pushing up from the couch where she had sat. “Yep. Inoichi and Sai should be outside with a dispatch and a cart.” She hesitates, quirking an eyebrow. “He’s not coming, is he.”

Kakashi exhales, in a rush, and then shrugs. Waving his hand. “He’s… over there.” He hesitates, swallowing. “He’s upset.”

Tsunade’s big brown eyes are on his, seeing it all. “Not rushing to him must be torture.”

Kakashi grimaces. “He’s fine, just…” Suffering.

His traitorous heart skips a beat, wondering… no dwelling on the reason. 

He feels vaguely sick.

Tsunade exhales, through her nose, obviously guessing correctly. “You should kick that guilt’s ass, right now.”

Kakashi pulls a face, looking away.

Tsunade’s eyebrows lift up. “I mean it. You gave him the choice, you warned him. This was inevitable.”

Kakashi sighs, and then groans. “Doesn’t make it easier.”

 

Tsunade’s smile is warm. And a bit painful. “No, it doesn’t.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Obito pulls a face, sticks in hand, staring down at his nigiris. “You want to know where I put Konan?”

Kakashi blinks, watching him carefully. “Didn’t you bury her in Amegakure?”

Obito hesitates, and then weighs his head, shooting a look at Iruka, who is watching, silently. “I…” He sighs, drawing a hand over his face. “I put her into the mausoleum with the others.”

Kakashi frowns. “So… why is that bad?”

Obito grimaces. “She almost killed me back then, and I didn’t have much time. I just…”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, slowly. “You didn’t give her a proper burial.”

Obito fidgets, eyes lowered. “No.”

Iruka speaks up, tone calm. “You should do that then.” He inhales, deeply. “I cannot leave, the academy starts tomorrow, but maybe…”

Obito interjects, hastily. “No.” He looks up, eyes locked with Iruka’s. “No, I’m not going without you.” He reaches out, interlacing his right hand fingers with Iruka’s. “You’re my guiding light. I need you.”

Kakashi swallows, smile wobbly. Hurting so good for a moment.

Iruka lifts Obito’s hand up, presses a kiss to the knuckles. “Alright.” He exhales, and then looks at Kakashi. “I’ll go by Tsunade later with Obito so he can give her the location.” He hesitates. “And ask her to bury them properly.”

Kakashi nods, silently, and then sighs. “She wanted to help set up the machine we retrieved earlier. So you will probably find her there.”

Obito nods.

Kakashi watches him for a long moment, debating whether to push, but Obito seems to be stuck on and in memories, and if he is honest, Kakashi cannot blame him. 

He turns his gaze to Iruka. “So. Feeling prepared for Naruto and Sakura haunting your steps once more? And Itachi, sometimes.”

Iruka snorts around a bite he just took. Shaking his head, his mouth full. “No?” He grins and swallows, brown eyes sparkling. “I know they’ll be a handful, but they have also matured so much. They have both prepared, and the children are all soooooo excited to have them there. It’s going to be a wild, but beautiful ride.”

Kakashi nods, with a small smile. “Good.”

Iruka hums, watching him. “So. I heard?”

Kakashi frowns. “What did you hear.”

Iruka weighs his head. “Supposedly Naruto came after you the other day?”

Kakashi grunts, reaching for his tea. Obito’s gaze is a weight on his skin. “Heard that from Hinata?”

Iruka shrugs. “Sakura.”

Kakashi sighs, soundlessly. “Yeah… it’s getting harder.” He grimaces. “Sasuke wants to talk with me.”

Iruka lifts his eyebrows. “I see.”

Kakashi fidgets. “I think they’re breaking up.”

Obito grimaces, with a quirk of his eyebrow.

Iruka waves his hand at him. “You do realize that you need to give him space to mourn. Otherwise it will never properly heal.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, and then nods, once. “I know.” I know.

Iruka sighs, soundlessly, and then reaches over, to squeeze his shoulder, voice kind. “If they’ve really broken up it marks the beginning of the end of your… waiting. Just a bit more time, to do it properly.”

Kakashi snorts, drawing a hand over his face, staring up at the ceiling. 

His voice is muffle behind it. “I just don’t think I’ll be able to reject him, you know? At this point? If he comes to me?”

Obito clicks his tongue. “Naruto is extremely aware of his own feelings though. I think while he may come to you for comfort… he will need his space to come to term with this.” He swallows, locking his gaze with Kakashi’s. “We all know that pain of the heart is quite different to all other pains.”

Kakashi grimaces. “Yeah.”

 

Iruka hums, repeating around a mouthful, brown eyes seeing too much. “Give him space.”

 

Kakashi averts his gaze.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi stares at Tsunade’s face in the photo, her eyes always carrying a bit of a tease. 

It’s impossible to know when the photo was taken, her appearance seemingly as unchangeable as the sun.

He sighs. Have you found him already? Have you and Suigetsu retrieved him? Did it work?

He sighs again, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose.

 

There’s a knock on the door, and Kakashi glowers at it for a long moment, feeling emotional exhausted already. Calling out after straightening up. “Come on in.”

 

 

The door opens and Sasuke comes in, silently, purple eyes dark somehow. There’s rings under his eyes still, but they seem not as deep anymore, than a few weeks ago. 

Not as jarring as they had been when he’d reported for duty after that weekend. 

 

Kakashi had quirked an eyebrow… and Sasuke had shaken his head. 

Had taken the mission and left. 

Naruto had blinked tears away.

 

Kakashi wonders whether they’ll have that talk, now. 

He knows Naruto has thrown himself into his teaching job, and has been doing a fantastic job, to some peoples utter astonishment. Though Iruka has only smirked. 

 

He knows Sasuke brilliantly fulfilled the mission. 

 

 

Sasuke clicks his tongue now, with a quirk of his eyebrow. “Kakashi, the mission went well. I was able to apprehend the robbers, and they have been turned over to authority. I escorted them to Hozuki castle after the verdict. I am supposed to extend greetings from Kahyo-san.”

He hesitates, and then smirks, just softly. “She has given birth, all seems to be well, though the baby came a bit early and is small. The doctor and midwife said he will be alright. She has called the boy ‘Houki’.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, and then nods, with a smirk. “I see. Thank you, Sasuke.” He hesitates, and then locks their eyes again. “Anything… else?”

Sasuke blinks, very slowly. “I… I wish to go to Uzushiogakure with them in spring.”

Kakashi nods, slowly. “Alright… I think we can plan around your absence.”

Sasuke nods, and then shrugs. “And we need to talk.”

Kakashi pushes his tongue to his fang for a moment, looking away. “It’s up to you.” He looks back at Sasuke. “Don’t think I don’t understand.”

Sasuke frowns, tone surprisingly soft. “No. I know you do.” He inhales, deeply, sounding bone-tired. “Can I come by tonight?”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, once. “Of course.”

Sasuke nods, and turns on his heel, but hesitates, with a look back over his shoulder. “You know, my respect for you has only grown…”

He doesn’t elaborate further, leaves without another word, and Kakashi stares after him, silently, for long minutes, his heart aching for Sasuke, the thought just the tiniest bit wry. 

 

And bittersweet. 

 

Honestly? So has mine.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Sasuke drops down onto his window sill, silently, like a shadow, holding a bottle of sake.

 

Kakashi blinks, and then turns to point at the small kitchen area. “Rice with chicken teriyaki?”

 

Sasuke nods and then clambers in, placing the bottle onto the table and then going to retrieve glasses, very matter-of-factly. Pouring the sake silently.

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, already mourning the fact that Tsunade is not here to cure his hangover tomorrow morning, and carries the bowls with food over. He pulls his mask down, feeling naked, but knowing they will have to do this without barriers. 

Sasuke takes the bowl, with a nod, tone calm. “It’s still very hot.”

Kakashi nods, taking his own bowl. “Yeah, it’s been a hot summer.” He hums. “They say the weather will hold a few more weeks, and then temperatures will likely drop again.”

Sasuke picks up a bit of rice. “So your birthday party will be outdoors?”

Kakashi shrugs. “Probably. The daimyo wants to come, so…”

Sasuke nods, silently.

 

Kakashi forces himself to eat, calmly, a thousand questions on his tongue. 

He doesn’t really taste the food.

 

Sasuke hums. “Tastes good.”

Kakashi nods, silently. Quirking an eyebrow.

Sasuke sighs, putting his half-empty bowl away and then reaches for the glasses, offering one to Kakashi. “I’m not doing this sober.”

Kakashi nods again, and then puts his bowl away as well, taking the glass. “I can empathize.”

Sasuke snorts, and then toasts him. “To new adventures.”

Kakashi presses his lips together, raising his glass as well. “To… the man you’ve become.”

Sasuke blinks, and then smiles a small, wobbly smile, before emptying his glass.

Kakashi does so, too, watches silently as Sasuke refills their glasses, while the alcohol burns down is throat.

 

Sasuke sighs, looking at his glass. “I always thought, growing up, that being grown-up would be easier… that feelings and relationships would be clear.” He shoots Kakashi a look, from the corner of his eyes. “But it’s all muddied waters, bonds or not. Feelings that exist beyond what everyone yearns for.”

Kakashi swallows, and then grins, a bit brittle. “There’s love outside bonds.”

Sasuke snorts, and then grins, equally painfully. “Indeed.” He takes a sip, and then smacks his lips, watching the sake slosh a bit in the glass when he rolls his wrist. “I came to give you a birthday-gift.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a moment. “Sasuke…”

Sasuke grins at him, when Kakashi reopens his eyes, almost sincerely. “Yeah well, no need to thank me.” He sobers, his expression shattering for a split-second, before it reassembles into painful neutrality. “It’s been yours anyway.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly. Refilling their glasses. “I told you before, he is not something to be had.”

Sasuke stares at him, and then clicks his tongue, tone vaguely amused. “Such a nice innuendo…”

Kakashi blinks. And then rolls his eyes, just a bit.

Sasuke smirks, painfully. “No, but really. I know you’re right, of course.” His throat clicks as he swallows. “Still.” He frowns. “The last… one and a half years have been the best time of my life. Being here, with him, and Itachi and Sakura…” He trails off, jaw working. 

His voice is a vicious hiss when he continues. “But it’s also torn at me. How can all these bonds form and mine…” He trails off, pressing his lips together.

Kakashi grimaces, and then leans in, with a whisper. “Why don’t we ask Kaguya, Sasuke? She could at least…”

“No!” Sasuke interjects, forcefully, eyes flashing. “No. I don’t want to seem that…” He grimaces, and then inhales deeply. “It’s just unfair.”

Kakashi exhales, watching the reflection on the sake’s surface. “It is.”

Sasuke nods, silently. 

 

Kakashi raises his glass slowly, tone extremely careful. “You’ve broken up, haven’t you.”

Sasuke smirks, in a smile that cuts. “So he hasn’t told?”

Kakashi takes a sip, and then shakes his head. “He’s hurting.”

Sasuke looks away, swallowing. Upending his glass. 

He nods, clearing his throat. “That is my gift to you. But you already know that. And in a way it is a gift for him, too. And… myself.”

Kakashi grimaces, tone imploring, while his heart hammers. “Are you sure?”

Sasuke’s eyes find his, infinitely sad. “You saved me. I know he did, too, but you did, as well.” He frowns, with a swallow. “I owe you this.”

Kakashi shakes his head, once. Forcing the words out. “You don’t owe me anything.”

Sasuke exhales. “As I said. Still. Besides - it’s not going to take long now. He wants this too badly. “

Kakashi looks away, drawing a shaky hand over his face.

 

Sasuke’s voice comes, like silk, hiding barbed wire. “Don’t you want it?”

Kakashi snorts, voice scratchy. “You know I do. But…” Iruka said those wounds need to heal first. And he’s right. He usually is. Kakashi swallows, looking back. “There are lots of things to consider, Sasuke. It’s… just difficult.”

Sasuke blinks slowly, watching him intently. 

And then sighs, through his nose. “You’re a good man, Kakashi.”

Kakashi grunts. 

 

Sasuke’s eyes narrow, and humor steals into their gaze, gentling the whole of Sasuke’s features. “Just remember there’s two to tango.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Yeah, the last tango made that abundantly clear.”

Sasuke grins, a real grin, there and gone again. “No, I meant, you won’t know what hit you.”

Kakashi pulls a bit of a face, for effect. “Now I’m scared.”

Sasuke chuckles, under his breath. “As you should be.”

 

They share a quick grin, and it’s easier suddenly, the stifling intensity of before gone.

 

Sasuke sobers slowly, with a nod. “Now that Itachi has dug out his trenches with the council, there’ll always be an Uchiha to weigh in on decisions.” 

Kakashi weighs his head. “For the foreseeable future, yes.”

Sasuke frowns. “Do you plan to release him from your circle of advisors?”

Kakashi blinks, and then shakes his head, with a small chuckle. “God, no.” He grunts. “What I meant is that there is no guarantee that his kids… or your kids… or… Obito’s kids might wish to enter politics after him.”

“Ah.” Sasuke grimaces, and then snorts, picking at a fluff on his pants. “That’s true. I would rather cut my hand off than deal with the old…” He trails off, expression vaguely embarrassed.

Kakashi hums. “Geezers? Assholes? Pains of my working time?”

Sasuke snorts, ducking his head. 

Kakashi smirks. 

And raises his glass again, tone very soft. “To new beginnings then. Whatever they may bring.”

Sasuke swallows, and then raises his own glass. Echoing. “Whatever they may bring.”

 

Kakashi finishes his drink in one long swallow, feeling the warmth spread now, from his very core - and soul. 

Sasuke exhales, softly, and then reaches for his food again, settling back more comfortably, and Kakashi smirks, doing the same after a moment.

 

The silence is comfortable, now.

 

 

And Kakashi hugs Sasuke, tightly, before he leaves. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“Sasuke seems better.”

 

Kakashi grunts, holding his head.

Itachi smirks softly, tilting his head to catch Kakashi’s gaze. “Thank you, Senpai.”

Kakashi sighs through his nose, nodding once, cursing silently when the world is still spinning a bit.

His voice is gravelly. “Yeah, well.” He clears his throat. “He mentioned he wishes that there is always an Uchiha as an advisor present.”

Itachi blinks, and then drawls, eyebrows raised. “I see. Guess we have our work cut out then.”

Kakashi snorts, and then hisses, regretting it viciously when his headache throbs.

Itachi’s voice is definitely amused now. “You know I could get Sakura and ask her t…”

Kakashi waves at him, with a look up. “Forget it. I’ll bear it like a responsible adult. Whining and cursing.”

Itachi chuckles, under his breath.

 

Kakashi leans back with a sigh, watching him for a moment. 

He swallows, quirking an eyebrow. “How is it going, Itachi? I know the last weeks have been difficult, work- and acceptance-wise. It was a bit of a bumpy ride. How are holding up? How is… everything with Sakura coming along?” He grins suddenly, just a bit meanly. “I remember her parents…”

Itachi snorts, and then pulls up a chair, to settle in front of Kakashi’s desk. 

He leans back in it, eyes unseeing on the windows, arms loosely crossed around the folders he is carrying. “They are intense.” He hesitates, and then shakes his head. “But they mean well. They are so different from what I remember from my own parents… totally uninterested in politics, almost without ambition. They just love Sakura and want her to be… happy.” Itachi swallows, and then clicks his tongue. “Don’t get me wrong, we were loved, too. But it was different. The chasm that ran through the village made it impossible for my parents to just… live.” He smiles, a painful little smile that’s there and gone again. “Sakura’s parents are greatly looking forward to possible grandchildren. They… don’t exactly put on pressure, but it’s clear they expect it.” He weighs his head. “We haven’t exactly made plans for that, but…” He shrugs.

Kakashi nods. 

Itachi smirks. “As for work, it was expected that not everyone would be pleased for you to elevate me to advisor. I, who has…” He trails off, with a grimace.

Kakashi continues, softly. “You, who always were blunt and truthful to me, even when you couldn’t speak of things?”

Itachi ducks his head, with an embarrassed little blush. “Yeah, well. In retrospect I wished I had.” He frowns. “Imagine if we’d gone after Obito instead.” He looks up at Kakashi. “The two of us could have taken him down.”

Kakashi watches him, carefully. “You thought he was Madara then.”

Itachi sighs, soundlessly. “Yes, and no.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, silently.

Itachi rolls his eyes, just a bit. “It’s the hair, you know? His hair was short.”

Kakashi snorts, tone suffused by pain and humor. “And we both know somewhere deep down the real Madara would have never cut off his hair…”

Itachi grins wryly, and then shrugs. “Yes.” He hums. “I wish I’d had the confidence to trust my gut back then.”

Kakashi rubs the bridge of his nose, shaking his head once. “We were only kids.” He frowns, and then changes the subject, deliberately. “A propos kids: How is teaching?”

 

Itachi lets his head fall back a bit, with a grin, the black hair loosely tied into a pony tail slipping down over his shoulders. “Ahhhh… good. There is a huge demand and interest. It’s also a bit weird since we, I mean Sakura, Naruto and me here, that we… teach with Minato and Kushina.” He snorts.  “It’s palpable weird for the other teachers, too, because while they seem to love it they’re also…” He shakes his head, with a shrug. 

Kakashi hums. “Freaking out a bit every time you show up?”

Itachi smirks. “Yes, something like that. It might take a while to get normal.”

Kakashi nods, and then takes a sip of his peppermint tea, glad when his stomach doesn’t rebel. 

He quirks an eyebrow. “Are there many kids capable of genjutsu?”

Itachi weighs his head. “Some. Genjutsu isn’t exactly known for having the coolest reputation…”, he ducks his head a bit, chuckling and shooting Kakashi a look, “though we both know that it can be a very powerful tool.” Kakashi nods silently, and Itachi continues, after a moment. “I’ve also been training weapons classes, and we are set up to take a field trip with Guren in a few weeks. First time out of the village for some of these kids. That’ll be fun.”

Kakashi grins. “Where are you going?”

Itachi waves his left hand a bit. “Oh, just halfway down to Sunagakure, to the river. We want to train standing on water a bit more, and they can train survival skills there. It’s also a good area to try to create fireballs in… no-one around for miles and miles.”

Kakashi chuckles, tilting his head. “Sakura isn’t coming?”

Itachi shakes his head. “No. She and Kushina are doing their own field trip, and Minato and Naruto are, too. One of the other teachers will come with us though, so all the groups will have three adults with them. There is talk about taking a student from the medical academy with us, too, but that’s not settled yet.”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Still. Good idea. Practical experience for them, and additional safety measures for you.”

Itachi hums. “Indeed.”

 

They are silent for a moment, and Kakashi breathes a sigh of relief when he feels his stomach settle a bit more, finally. 

 

Itachi shoots him a sly look. “Want us to remove the alcohol from your birthday party?”

Kakashi snorts. “Oh yeah, that would go over well?”

They share a chuckle, and Kakashi watches Itachi for a moment, watches the happiness that radiates from the once very grave and solemn face.

Itachi tilts his head. “What is it, Senpai?”

Kakashi shakes his head once, and then shrugs, and then… just grins. 

 

And Itachi grins back.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Hey.”

 

Kakashi looks up from his reports, his heart beating like a drum, but he tries to keep cool, his mouth dry. 

He clicks his tongue, very quietly. “Hey.”

Naruto shifts on his feet, looking away, out the windows at the setting sun.

He sniffs. “I’m sorry I have been so absent, I…”

Kakashi shakes his head once. “No need to apologize.” I know how it hurts. Even, or maybe especially when you know it’s coming.

Naruto nods. Kakashi distantly notes his hair is the tiniest bit longer now, falling down over the hitai-ate and he surprises himself by missing the shorter look, the shaggy locks making Naruto look … vulnerable. He sighs soundlessly. 

Naruto sniffs again, and then nods again, with a quirk of his eyebrows. “So, wanna go for a swim?”

Kakashi blinks, very slowly. “A swim?”

Naruto tilts his head at the windows. “It’s been so hot today. Totally apart from the fact that I know that you had a long day… it’d be refreshing, you know?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, vaguely amused. “Yeah, I know.”

 

There is a pause, and Kakashi watches Naruto fidget, silently.

 

Naruto’s throat clicks as he swallows. “Please.”

Kakashi shivers, and then pushes up, stepping round and up to Naruto in one gliding motion, dragging him into an embrace. Silently.

Feeling the thrum, and the pain bleeding from him, and the devastation pouring from every pore… combined with hope, making it all just terrible.

Naruto sobs, once, before his arms come up, clinging to Kakashi for dear life, face buried into Kakashi’s mask.

Kakashi rocks him a bit, just gently, kneading Naruto’s scalp, slowly, just holding. 

There is no charge to their embrace, not this time, and it’s even more precious somehow, just comfort, extended. Needed. Kakashi smiles, softly, painfully, pressing his cheek onto Naruto’s ducked head. 

Inhaling, deeply, something deep, deep, deep within him relaxing.

He feels Naruto sigh, in return.

Naruto’s shoulders relax, just a bit. 

 

Kakashi presses a clothed kiss onto skin.

 

Naruto withdraws, just a bit, eyes lowered. “So. Swimming?”

Kakashi tilts his head, holding him loosely in an embrace now, watching the mobile face. 

The face that looks so much more grown up than a few weeks ago, marked with a severity that tugs at Kakashi’s heartstrings.

There is only one answer, really.

 

Kakashi shrugs, just lightly. “Anything you want.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Ugh, I hadn’t thought the lake would be this cold.”

 

Kakashi snorts, pushing through the in fact rather chilled water. “It’s because the river feeds it. There’s always fresh water flowing in and out, so it stays cool.” He dips his head down into the water for a moment, coming up shaking himself, the droplets flying. 

He grins. “Regretting dragging me out?”

 

Naruto chuckles, the gravity in his face and voice almost gone. “Never.”

Kakashi hums, splashing him a bit, watching the grin spread on Naruto’s face, his stomach flipping. 

Naruto’s eyes sparkle at him, dark in the light of the stars, the moon a thin sickle. 

Naruto points a finger, treading water. “You look like a wet dog.”

Kakashi snorts, and then waggles his head and eyebrows. And then barks. “Whoof.”

Naruto laughs out loud, and then almost goes under, giggling.

 

Kakashi grins at him.

 

Naruto pushes in, with a powerful kick, gliding right up to Kakashi, one arm coming up and around Kakashi’s shoulders, in a way that’s so comfortable it takes Kakashi’s breath.

The other hand hovers over Kakashi’s mouth, Naruto’s eyes transfixed on it.

Kakashi watches the shimmer of the moon and stars on Naruto’s wet skin, watches a droplet run down from Naruto’s hair, down over his nose, catching on a whisker. 

Watching a blush spread, slowly.

Naruto’s voice is a whisper. “Don’t look at me like that.”

Kakashi blinks, speaking against the fingers, while strongly treading water now to support them both, hands out for stabilization. “Like what.”

Naruto tilts his head, licking his lips, sending a pang down into Kakashi’s guts. “Like… I am the most precious thing in the world.”

Kakashi blinks, frowning just a bit. “But you are?”

Naruto ducks his head, and then clicks his tongue, just a bit. “I’m… not that special. Just a guy.” His eyes come up, to stare at Kakashi. “Just like you.”

Kakashi swallows, and then blinks, very slowly, feeling vaguely light-headed. “I bet Kurama disagrees there.”

Naruto grins, nose scrunching adorably. He hums. “Maybe.”

Kakashi grins, for a moment, and then nips at the tips of Naruto’s fingers, watching the blush deepen, tone deliberately light, teasing. “Also, I am entitled to thinking you the hottest thing since sliced bread, thank you very much.”

Naruto snorts, with a chuckle.

And then grins, tone saucy. “Yeah, you are entitled to that.”

Kakashi hums, and then sobers, just a bit. “I’m entitled to that now.”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, eyes fixed on his fingertips touching Kakashi’s lips again, emulating a mask. “It’s been quite the ride.”

Kakashi breathes against them. “Yes.”

Naruto shivers. 

He clicks his tongue. “I’m not sure if I’d been able to wait as long as you have…” Kakashi opens his mouth to respond, to tell him he’s had help,  but Naruto continues, voice breathless. “You’re way too hot.”

It’s Kakashi’s turn to blush, heavily. He’s feeling decidedly hot in the cold water now, high on the pheromones Naruto is giving off. 

 

Naruto’s fingers press now, gently, prying his mouth open and Kakashi lets them, watching Naruto watch his mouth. 

Something twitches over Naruto’s face, something indecipherable, the eyes transfixed on his own fingers when he pushes them in to draw the pad of his finger along the tip of Kakashi’s left eyetooth.

His voice is breathless. “You have fangs, too.”

Naruto’s eyes snap up, for a moment, before they go back to Kakashi’s teeth. 

His voice is a growl. “And they’re sharp.”

Kakashi swallows, trying not to breathe. Knowing that were he to close his mouth, just a bit… 

Naruto lifts his now fathomless black eyes to Kakashi’s, breath hard and fast suddenly, and Kakashi knows, knows, that they’re both imagining Kakashi sucking on Naruto’s fingers now. And then…

 

Kakashi draws back a bit, with a shuddering breath, pressing a kiss to the pads of Naruto’s fingers. 

Naruto swallows, noisily. 

His voice is rough. “I’ve agonized over… what is and what will be, those last few weeks.” He swallows again, shaking his head once. Kakashi watches him, fascinated by the way the low light plays with the dip of his Cupid’s bow.

Naruto grins, for just a moment, shifting to float closer. 

He sighs, with a small smile, that is almost cute. “I know that were I to lift my legs around your hips now…”, he tightens his arm around Kakashi’s shoulder, just a bit, leaning in to press his forehead against Kakashi’s, “if our bodies were to touch properly now…”

Kakashi exhales, shudderingly, impossibly hard, knowing Naruto is, too. 

He can taste it, there, between them.

 

He licks his lips, nudging Naruto’s nose with his own.

Grins, with an effort. “Anticipation is the best thing.”

Naruto sighs, shudderingly. 

And then snarls. With a laugh, to take the bite out. “I’m so gonna drag you out of your office to fuck on a regular basis as soon as we’ve made that jump.”

Kakashi snorts, while arousal twists, sharply. “I bet the desk is a good height to bend me over, too.”

“Fuck.” Naruto hisses and then pushes away, pushing Kakashi back in the process, panting at him, openly. 

Kakashi can see the elongated fangs, the wet lips.

He shivers.

 

Naruto tilts his head back, just a bit, eyes glued to Kakashi’s.

His voice is pained. “You’re a fiend.”

Kakashi grins, feeling absolutely high. Pouring oil into the fire, unable to fucking help himself. “You’ll have to make me though.”

“Uuuurghhhh.” Naruto groans, and then pushes farther away, glowering at Kakashi. 

Who licks his lips. “Think you can?”

Naruto stares at him, blinking slowly. 

 

And then cackles, loudly. “It finally makes sense.”

Kakashi frowns, taken slightly aback, snapping a bit out of it again. “What does?”

Naruto smirks, pushing back in a bit, weighing his head. “You. Always reading Icha Icha.” He waggles his eyebrows. “All these innuendos… you’re a prankster.”

Kakashi snorts, mightily amused. “You’re only figuring that out now?”

Naruto rolls his eyes, and then hits him in the shoulder, lightly. 

Leaning in, just a bit. “I love it.”

 

Kakashi winks at him. “Good.”

 

Naruto bits his lips, and then looks away, with a chuckle. “So. I guess swimming wasn’t the best idea either?”

Kakashi snorts. “Well, depends on what you meant for it to happen?”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, and looks back, with a click of his tongue, movements, gentle now, to stay afloat. His voice is soft. “I just wanted to be close to you.”

Kakashi hums, watching him intently. “But even you feel like we need to take it slow.”

Naruto licks his lips, and then snorts, with a grimace. “I don’t want to.” He hesitates. “But yeah, I guess…” He swallows. “I need you. In my life, close… but I also need to…” He trails off.

Kakashi hums. “Digest Sasuke?”

Naruto snorts, voice breaking on the word. “Yeah.” He inhales, deeply, and then winks at Kakashi. “Still. As I said - I need this.” He weighs his head. “Sooo….”

He grins and then splashes at Kakashi and Kakashi snorts, lightly splashing back. 

He waggles his eyebrows. “Just a bit of fun, tonight?”

 

Naruto hums, and then splashes again, with a broad smile. “Yeah. You may dream of other fun… I will.”

Kakashi’s voice is husky. “Oh?”

Naruto grins, and Kakashi watches in fascination as a dimple appears and is gone again, the whiskers quivering. His voice is a breath. “We’re allowed to now, aren’t we.”

 

Kakashi bites his lips, and then exhales, watching Naruto’s eyes glitter at him. “Yes. We’re allowed to, now.”

 

 

Finally.

 

 

Chapter 53: Chalk on the blackboard

Notes:

There is a version of “You’re the one that I want” by Lo-Fang that I was (really really really) hard pressed to use here… I mean the song by John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John is iconic, but the Lo-Fang version has something very intimate.
And I really dig the “You better shape up, cause I need a man… and my heart is set on you.” part here, because yes, Naruto needs to shape up a bit still *g*

Also, Hatsu-Hinode is the first sunrise in a new year.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

“So, how is he holding up in the academy?”

 

Iruka grunts, taking one nigiri and looking at it for a moment, obviously collecting his thoughts. “Good?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, vaguely amused. “Just… good?”

Iruka sighs, and then rolls his eyes. “Well, you know he and Konohamaru get along like a house on fire, as they always have, and it doesn’t seem to matter that Konohamaru has actually graduated and is a genin on missions already, he is aaaallllways there when he’s not away.” Iruka grumbles something under his breath, while Kakashi chuckles, silently. Iruka shoots him a look. “It’s driving me nuts.”

Kakashi grins, munching on a cucumber outside roll. “And apart form that?”

Iruka grins for a moment. “Apart from that he is really, really, and I mean really good with the kids. You should have seen the birthday party they threw for him. And his shuriken throwing classes are a hoot,”, Iruka grimaces a bit, with a sidelong look, “much to the horror of the other teachers to be frank, because instead of the normal targets he… lets them try and hit his bunshin…”

Kakashi snorts, ducking his head, and waggling his eyebrows. “Oh, I can literally see that.”

Iruka giggles. “Right? But I mean, it’s very effective. The kids are sooooo motivated to hit bunshin-Naruto’s butt. They’re getting the hang of it real fast, and I mean, the bunshin are moving, so it’s really, really effective…”

Kakashi laughs, silently, shoulders shaking. 

Shaking his head, too. “And Sakura? How is she holding up?”

Iruka clicks his tongue, with a small smile, while dipping his sushi in the soy sauce. “She’s doing very well. The kids adore her. She is using her new skills to sense if something is wrong with any of them and she is always on mark, and caring. She has introduced basic healing for all her pupils, and we’re actually planning to expand that to the whole academy, because it’s so successful.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “But I thought healing takes a very certain and precise chakra control?”

Iruka nods. “That’s why I said basic. Sakura has worked with some doctors to narrow it down to a, comparatively, easily learnable jutsu, that can be applied to light wounds, like scratches or shallow cuts.”

Kakashi hums. “Useful. And of course chances are likely that some of them will expand that jutsu.”

Iruka takes a sip of his green tea. “Exactly. And of course her and Itachi’s relationship is the thing of every gossip and every group on the school yard.”

Kakashi hisses a bit, with a grimace. “Oh, I hope she’s not annoyed.”

Iruka shakes his head. “Not that I can see. Actually most pupils and teachers are extremely impressed by them taking it slow, for a confirmed bonded couple. I mean, relatively slow. Both their classes are planning something for the wedding though.”

Kakashi grins, munching on his rice. “Good.” He shoots Iruka a look. “And Itachi? I talked to him the other day, he seems happy?”

Iruka nods. “So far? A few parents were none too happy to have him teach genjutsu… but he simply invited them to attend the class, too. Some did, for a while, and he was able to assuage their fears by just… being himself.” Iruka shoots Kakashi a look. “It must have been so easy to work with him back then? He is just so… chill?”

Kakashi hums, with a nod. “He is, isn’t he. But there’s a chasm of feelings hiding behind those eyes. His soul… was old when he was born.” He frowns. “Don’t misunderstand me, he was an innocent kid like we all were, when we were thrown into…”, he hesitates, the word tasting bitter, “service.” He swallows. “I mean, of course we were asked, and Minato meant well, I know that, but…” He frowns. “Itachi always asked the important questions, saw too much. That was what, ultimately, enabled them to use him like this.”

 

Iruka stares into space for a moment, voice faraway. “Sasuke has been by the other day. He and Itachi are so similar and yet so different. Itachi has made the pain his own, while Sasuke fights it, still. Fights it once more, even.”

Kakashi swallows, leaning back. 

He clicks his tongue, suddenly feeling quite tired. “Sasuke was happier with Naruto.” Iruka frowns and Kakashi shrugs, continuing after a moment. “I mean… he needs someone irreverent, and self-reliant, and strong. Like Naruto. Someone able to give him a run for his money. Someone with whom he can let his guard down.” He closes his eyes for a moment. “I hope he’ll find whoever that is on his missions now. Or on the trip to Uzushiogakure.”

 

They are silent for a moment, and then Kakashi bumps into Iruka, gently. “So. Obito?”

Iruka grins, immediately, a gentle, soft grin that seems impossible to contain. “All good.”

Kakashi snorts. “Oh no, you’re not getting off without some details.”

Iruka rolls his eyes, with a little blush. “Oh it’s…” He blushes even deeper, sending Kakashi a look, his voice dropping to a whisper. “He just… you know. Tries, so hard.”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, laughter in his voice. “Tries?”

Iruka ducks his head, with a snicker. “No, not like doesn’t succeed.” He comes back up, beet red now, but with sparkling eyes. “No, I mean he is making an effort in every aspect of our relationship. A palpable, conscious effort.” He swallows, voice soft. “It’s quite breathtaking.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long moment, the words heartfelt. “I’m glad.”

Iruka smirks. “Well, with the kickoff we gave it…”

Kakashi grins, toasting him with his tea. “Right?”

 

Iruka lightly clinks their cups, with an echoing, shit-eating grin. “Right.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“Sasuke, I’m sending you out with Hinata to pick up her sister Hanabi for a trip to Kirigakure. As you probably know Hanabi has been staying with their father, in the outskirts. You will escort them and stay with them in Kirigakure for two months, and then return with Ao-san, who will meet with the security unit. You will also negotiate with Chōjūrō in regards to Suigetsu, who has expressed his desire to be able to return to Kirigakure without punishment, as you know.”

 

Sasuke frowns, the purple eyes dull somehow, twirling the scroll Kakashi offered him in his hands. “Do they need protection?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “I do not believe so. However, the Byakugan has been stolen before, as Ao is the living proof of. It is quite a different time now, but I would like to make sure nonetheless.” Kakashi hesitates, adding more softly. “It would also get you away from Konoha for a few months. I…”

Sasuke interjects, with a nod, and flat voice. “Yeah, that’s always good.”

Kakashi presses his lips together for a moment, feeling the waves of pain coming off Sasuke. 

He inhales. “You are expected to return with them in January. That will give you a few weeks time off then before the trip to Uzushiogakure.”

Sasuke nods, and then frowns. “How come you can send me away for a longer time now? Isn’t standing agreement that I keep close, as long as both Sakura and… Naruto are at the academy?”

Kakashi nods, and then shrugs. “Yes. However, I have spoken to both Guren and Sora. They will take on some missions. And the council can just…” Kakashi waves his hand, clearing his throat.

Sasuke ducks his head, just a bit, the black hair casting his face in shadows. “I see.” He nods, once. “Thank you.” He turns away, but hesitates, looking back over his shoulder. “I hope…” He trails off.

 

Kakashi swallows, his voice rough, eyes locked on the purple eyes that burn with desperation. 

He whispers. “Yes. Me, too.”

 

 

He stares at the door after Sasuke has left, for long minutes, his mind screaming at fate.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“You know, I hadn’t thought being your bodyguard would be that boring.”

 

Kakashi snorts, shooting Tenzou a look before forcing himself to return to the boring weapons inventory. “I feel like I should apologize, but I think Yugao is quite happy with it, and so…” He pulls an exaggerated face, shrugging. “Tough?”

Tenzou snorts, too. 

And then clicks his tongue. “Still. And without wanting to… neglect my other duties…”

He trails off and Kakashi looks up again, prompting. “Yes?”

Tenzou inhales, deeply. “I wish to analyze my unique abilities. Maybe compare them to whatever… dormant skills Naruto got from Hashirama’s necklace, if any. Naruto and I have been trying to awaken that affinity in him, but so far, no luck. Karin-san has approached me, has offered me her assistance.”

Kakashi blinks, leaning back a bit. “You are aware that Karin is working at the lab Orochimaru is at, right.”

Tenzou pulls a face, looking away, silently.

Kakashi narrows his eyes. Stating. “That is part of your reasoning.”

Tenzou exhales. “I want to keep an eye out, keep tabs.” He grimaces. “I…”

Kakashi blinks, slowly. “There is an Anbu squad there, watching, at any given time. You know that.”

Tenzou shifts to his other foot. “I know.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, and then reopens them again, tone tired. “Tenzou, I know there is a part of you that wants to be the one to keep Orochimaru under control.” He hesitates, tone gentling. “To be the one in control.”

Tenzou looks away and Kakashi pushes up, stepping around the desk. “But you are not the hapless victim of before, the one with nothing else to live for.” He leans back on the edge of the desk in front of Tenzou, crossing his ankles. “You are a father…” Something indecipherable passes over Tenzou’s face and Kakashi hesitates, abandoning pushing, and asking instead. “What.”

Tenzou fidgets.

And then blushes. “Yugao is pregnant.”

 

Kakashi blinks, and then stands up and moves in, hugging Tenzou to himself with all his might.

Tenzou chuckles, and then returns the embrace, with a sniff. 

He withdraws again, after just a moment, his eyes finding Kakashi’s.

His voice sounds brittle. “What if the child…” He trails off, eyes lowered.

Kakashi frowns, watching him for a long moment, prompting, softly. “What if the child has these abilities, too? Or what if it doesn’t?”

Tenzou grimaces, looking away. “I just… don’t know. These skills were given to me, forced upon me. I am afraid of what this child will show me…”

Kakashi hums, watching him intently. “I heard becoming a father is always scary?”

Tenzou rolls his eyes, shooting him a look tone gruff. “I already am a father.”

Kakashi nods, with a click of his tongue. “True, but not like this. For better or for worse, this is different.” He exhales, and then snorts. “It’s alright to be scared, trust me.”

Tenzou shoots him a somewhat sour look, tone acerbic. “Speaking from experience?” He stops, eyes suddenly very wide, and then colors, spectacularly. “I mean, sorry, Senpai, I mean, Rokudaime, I…”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Of for heaven’s sake. No, you’re right, I’m not quite in the position. Yet. And it manages to scare me shitless already.”

Tenzou deflates a bit, shoulders sagging. “It does?”

 

Kakashi nods, and then points towards the sofa, settling on it.

He waits until Tenzou has settled as well, keeping his voice soft. “That is why you want to work with Karin.”

Tenzou sighs, and then nods. “If I will pass them on, I need to be able to understand my powers. Truly understand them, I mean.” He grimaces. “Becoming aware of them as a child was quite messy… I don’t want my child to accidentally punch someone through the stomach or something.”

Kakashi hums, and then quips, lightly. “I think the other parents will appreciate that.”

Tenzou snorts. “You likely won’t have that problem at least.”

Kakashi hums, weighing his head. “Yeah, but I will have other problems.” He snorts, rubbing over his face, words muffled. “I mean we’re not even close to there yet, but it’s aaaaallll laid out.” He grunts, shaking his head once. “And I don’t know how to feel about that.”

Tenzou watches him intently. “Don’t you want to?”

Kakashi blinks, very slowly, answering from the bottom of his soul. “I want to.”

Tenzou frowns. “But then…”

Kakashi inhales, deeply. “They are part of the web fate has spun… already, I mean. I never told you, but Jiraiya used to have a dream, with a black-haired man with purple eyes, coming to Konoha, with a light-haired boy with two whiskers…”

Tenzou quirks an eyebrow, tone careful. “Sasuke takes your son on some kind of time-travel?”

Kakashi bites his lips. “Apparently.”

Tenzou blinks. “Huh.”

 

They are silent, staring into space. 

Tenzou speaks up once more, after a moment. “At least you can already think about names?”

Kakashi snorts, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I guess.”

Tenzou looks at him, black eyes seeing too much. “How is it? Coming along I mean?”

Kakashi exhales, shrugging. “Our bond?” He nods. “It is?”

Tenzou prompts, echoing. “It… is?”

Kakashi shrugs. “Every time we… meet it’s getting harder and harder to resist. We got a raincheck back then on the battlefield, for a myriad of reasons, but now…”

Tenzou hums. “Now those reasons are gone.”

Kakashi grimaces, whispering. “He’s still so young.”

Tenzou clicks his tongue. “And already a major pain in everybody’s ass.”

Kakashi snorts, and then chuckles, tone dry. “He always has been?” He frowns, still grinning. “Why though? What has he done now?”

Tenzou waves a hand. “Oh, nothing really bad. It’s just that he and Obito are living their best lives by simultaneously pranking and spoiling Sensei Iruka. As you know Yugao sometimes teaches kenjutsu at the academy now. And she told me that Naruto and Obito often hang out during the breaks, scheming.”

Kakashi blinks. “Scheming.” And you haven’t told, Iru-kun. What are they doing?

Tenzou waggles his eyebrows. “Mhhh hhhmmm. Apparently they are teaming up to distract Iruka-san and then leave little tokens of affection for him everywhere. Naruto has apparently even made a lesson slash game out of it for his students. From what I understand they put up little chocolate hearts with ‘Iruka and Obito’ on it all around the school yard. And write it in chalk on the blackboards. Little paper messages that the kids pass around and pretend it’s cheating and when Iruka confiscates them he finds messages from Obito. Stuff like that.” 

Kakashi blinks, and then coos. “Awwwww. And Iruka is of course beyond embarrassed by it and helplessly flattered…” He trails off as a vicious bout of terror rushes through him. “Oh god, do you think Naruto expects that of me, I mean, I’m not particularly romantic, I mean I probably could be, possibly, but I…” Have no experience. Not really. Some with Iruka. But we’ve been so young then. I was so young and naive and…  He grunts, pinching the bridge of his nose again. 

Tenzou smirks at him, gleefully pouring salt into the wound. “I think that he and Obito will make it clear what Naruto expects.”

Kakashi groans, painfully. “Oh man, Sasuke said I wouldn’t know what hit me.”

Tenzou laughs out. “Sasuke said that?”

Kakashi nods, feeling like sinking into the floor. “Yeah, he said it took two to tango.”

Tenzou cackles. “Like on my wedding?”

Kakashi whines. “Oh god, they’re planning something already, aren’t they.” He grimaces, remembering Naruto’s words suddenly. “Ah man, he said he agonized about what is and what will be…”

Tenzou is openly laughing at him now, eyes sparkling, tone dripping with amusement. “You’re toast, Senpai.”

Kakashi grunts. 

 

And then sniffs, while his stomach flutters. “But what a way to go?”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Heyyyyyyyyyy!”

 

Kakashi chuckles, picking Mirai up who is running at him, squealing, and then whirls around with her in his arms, her little arms holding fast around his neck.

Kurenai chuckles. “Careful, Kakashi, she just ate.”

Mirai lifts her head, pouting. “Am fine.”

Kurenai nods. “I’m sure you are, honey, but it wouldn’t be nice to throw up on the Hokage’s uniform, would it?” 

Kakashi grins, and then slows to a stop, tickling Mirai just a little bit. “I’ve got a spare.” He shifts her to his left hip, reaching up to push a lock of hair out of her forehead. “My, my, you have grown, young lady.”

Mirai ducks her head. Mumbling into her fist. “‘m almost three.”

Kakashi nods. “Mhhh hhmmm, I know. Not quite.” He winks at Kurenai and then steps over to the side drawer, pulling out a wrapped gift. “Still. I got something for you for Shogatsu, Mirai. Thank you for coming by outside your Mom‘s duties.”

Mirai claps her hands, squealing, and then wriggles until Kakashi lets her down, gift in her hands.

 

She rips at the paper, and Kakashi steps over towards Kurenai, extending his arm. “Thank you for coming over. I’m sorry I couldn’t make it for lunch the other day.”

Kurenai waves a hand, voice low. “No matter. Yugao and Tenzou were over. Aiko and Mirai have a lot of fun together.” She smirks. “Yugao is radiant. And Tenzou is so doting. And scared shitless.” She snickers, and then sobers, tone wistful. “I’m so happy for them.”

Kakashi watches her for a moment. “You do know that he wants that for you, too, right? To be happy.”

Kurenai exhales, with a long blink. “I know.”

Mirai yells, pulling the draw-along toy out of the box, diverting their attention. She pulls at the cord, running around in the office with it for a moment, the bell in the toy ringing out loudly.

Kurenai’s tone is dry. “You do realize that turnabout is fair play.”

Kakashi blinks, and then blanches, just a bit. “Oh.” He grimaces. “Does a ‘sorry’ still count?”

Kurenai shakes her head, and then bends down and pokes Mirai as she’s running by, before straightening back up again, her tone fake-apologetic. “Nope. Sorry. No can do.”

Kakashi watches Mirai for a moment, the toy really loud. “Ah damn.”

Kurenai snickers. Evilly. 

 

She winks at him, and then leans back, watching him, with a smirk. “Looking good, Kakashi.”

Kakashi leans back also, exhaling and then grins, carefully giving her an eye-smile. “Thank you.” He hesitates, and then shrugs. “I think I’m finally relaxing.”

“Mhhh hmmm.” Kurenai hums, watching him intently. “How are you, Kakashi. I mean… beyond the obvious fact that you’ve settled in and are sleeping better.”

Kakashi snorts, and then looks at Mirai, unseeing. “Well, I’m good. As you said - I’ve settled in. There are parts which are becoming routine now, and that always helps. Shizune and Shikamaru are doing an awesome job and I caved and got myself a room downstairs, to sleep, which in fact actually helps.” He snorts. “I also decided to shove a few of the more menial but representative tasks at Minato, as you probably know. He happily took to them, and I believe he enjoys being out and about officially.”

Kurenai snorts. “Oh yes. He and Kushina are a blessing, and the villagers think so, too. Their death was such a tragedy back then, and to see it all come together once more…” She smirks softly. “I hope I get to truly meet them though before… you know.”

He frowns. “You haven’t met them?”

Kurenai shakes her head. “Officially I have.” She shrugs. “But, you know, not… really.”

 

Kakashi hums, nodding. 

He tilts his head towards Mirai. “You said you just ate?” 

Kurenai shakes her head. “She just ate at the daycare. Why?”

Kakashi winks at her. “Wanna come for dinner with me?”

Kurenai tilts her head. “What dinner?”

Kakashi grins. “That dinner. The official Bonenkai dinner.” He tilts his head. “I decided to celebrate it with them, but of course Kaguya is there as well. And Iruka and Obito might show up later. I’ve invited team 7 and their bonded as well, but I some of them already had plans. It’ll be a cozy round.”

Kurenai hesitates, and then clicks her tongue. “I need to find a baby-sitter.” 

Kakashi hums. “Tenzou and Yugao want to stay home due to her advanced state. Maybe Mirai would like to play with Aiko? I bet they‘d like that.”

Kurenai weighs her head. “I’ll ask them.” She hesitates. “Thank you, Kakashi.” Her voice drops a bit, pain bleeding in. “This year seems worse than the one before… probably because the wound has been reopened.”

Kakashi sniffs, reaching for her hand. “I know.”

 

Mirai clambers on his lap, pressing the toy into his face, babbling, and Kakashi snorts, turning to her with a grin.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“You made it!”

 

Kurenai ducks her head, just a bit. “I was lucky they took her, yes.”

Kakashi chuckles, drawing her into a quick embrace, and then shoving her towards the living room of the Hokage mansion. “Please, rescue me from all the innuendos.”

Kurenai blinks at him, with a frown. “Innuendos?”

Kushina pipes up, drawling. “Ahhhh, Kakashi, you knew what you’d get into when you suggested doing this here, with us… and them.” She grins, pointing a finger. “Besides, you need that.”

Kurenai grins, and then nods. “I agree. He needs that.”

Kushina grins, broadly, and then bows. “Kurenai-san, I believe. It is so good to have you here.”

Kurenai bows as well. “Thank you, Kushina-san. It is a pleasure.”

Kushina clicks her tongue, and then lopes her arm through Kurenai’s, dragging her along. “Come, I’ll introduce you to Minato and Kaguya.”

Kurenai blinks, and then shoots a somewhat panicked look at Kakashi.

Who just waves at her, calling after them. “Have fun!!”

 

Obito’s voice is a low rumble, shivering down Kakashi’s spine. “You’re sure that leaving someone you’ve had a threesome with alone with someone you, at least once upon a time, wanted to have a threesome with is a good idea?”

Kakashi grunts, turning to shoot Obito a skunk-eye. “Coming from someone I also had a threesome with…” He trails off, white-hot mortification rushing through him. “Oh god. This evening is going to be a disaster, isn’t it.”

Obito chuckles, soundlessly, shoulders shaking. 

His tone drips amusement. “Well, depends on what you call disaster?”

Kakashi groans, hiding his face in his hands for a moment, his voice muffled behind it. “And Naruto is coming, too.” He exhales, dropping his hands. “I invited Sasuke, too, but…” He is in Kirigakure. And I didn’t really want to withdraw him. 

Obito waves a hand. “Sasuke would not be coming even if he were here.” He grunts, lifting his glass. “He has more self-preservative instincts than to follow that invitation.” He weighs his head, taking a sip. “He would be with Itachi and Sakura and her parents tonight, which is its own beast, as we know, but…” He clicks his tongue, with a grin. “So, no need to fret there… bakakashi.”

 “Ah.” Kakashi exhales, and then nods, with a shrug. “I see.”

Obito hums. “It was good you invited him though.”

Kakashi grimaces. “Yeah?”

Obito nods. “Yeah.”

Kakashi nods, too. “Okay.” He claps his hands. “So, what do I have to do to get a drink here? Because I won’t survive this night sober?”

 

Iruka chuckles, stepping up to them, extending a glass of champagne for Kakashi. “Here. We wouldn’t want the guest of honor to suffer, would we.”

Kakashi blinks, taking the glass, and then narrows his eyes at him. “What are you not telling me.”

Iruka weighs his head, face too innocent, tone… Kakashi cannot place it. “Nothing. Just… I really know where Naruto got his prankster side from.” He narrows his eyes, shooting a heated look towards Obito, who just grins. “Not that that is always genetics.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, carefully examining his tattoo and stomach and… “But he’s not here yet. He’s…” He waves his arm. “Over there.”

Iruka nods, lifting his eyebrows. “True.”

Kakashi stares at him. “Iru-kun…”

Iruka lifts a hand, holding it up. “Nuh uh. Nope. Not going to tell.” He grins suddenly, waggling his eyebrows. “But you’ll… love it.” He snickers.

Kakashi stares at him, and then empties his glass, voice rough. “I need another drink.”

 

“Here. I wished to congratulate you as well.”

 

Kakashi turns towards Kaguya, pushing the empty glass at Iruka and accepting the cocktail from her after a moment. 

He blinks. “I… thank you.” He frowns. “What do you wish to congratulate me on?”

Kaguya smiles, her sharp teeth flashing. “On the fact that you have chosen the correct thread.”

Kakashi shivers, and then lightly touches his glass to hers. “I… thank you.” He shakes his head once, taking a sip, watching her do, too. He frowns. “How are you, Kaguya?”

Kaguya blinks, her weird ringing voice tickling. “I am well. Life is peaceful, and interesting. In time, I wish to travel once more… but I have time. I will do that when you and your kin have passed on.”

Oh.

Kakashi swallows, trying to quip. “I hope me and my ninken will be around for a while yet, sorry.”

Kaguya giggles. “Oh no, Kakashi-san. I meant you and your offspring. And theirs. There will be time for me to see the world when all the ties have been severed.” She sobers, slowly, her smile turning wistful. “There always is.”

Kakashi blinks, his voice soft. “I’m sorry.”

Kaguya exhales, ducking her head just a bit. “I thank you. But it is what separates us… I’m not sure I could follow you where you are going.” She frowns. “Though my sons passed over.” Pain flits over her face, there and gone again, her tone soft. “I hope one day I will be able to join them.”

Kakashi swallows again, hurting for her, his tone deliberately light. “I’m sure. And then we’ll meet again as well?”

She blinks, and then nods, slowly. “Indeed.” She exhales, through her nose. “But that web I cannot see.”

 

Obito speaks up, carefully. “Which means the unknown is out there for you still after all.”

Kaguya looks up and over at him, and then smiles, gently. “Indeed.” Her gaze flickers over to Iruka, who shifts under it. “And life is worth living after all.”

Iruka blinks, and then smiles, just softly. “It is.”

Kaguya nods to herself, and then turns her head towards the living room, where laughter can be heard now. She inhales, her expression taking on a dreamy component. “Oh. How I love this dish.”

Kakashi hums, and then starts towards the room, slowly. “Which one?”

Kaguya sighs, happily. “Toshikoshi-Soba.”

Kakashi grins. “For some reason I hadn’t taken you for a soup fan.”

Kaguya shrugs, elegantly. “Everyone is composed of myriads of facets?”

Kakashi hums. “Indeed.” He shares a quick grin with her, marveling at the fact how easy it is.

 

His tattoo tickles, his heartbeat speeding up.

 

He’s here.

 

Minato calls over to him, cheeks flushed. “Ah, Kakashi, finally, you have to rescue me.”

Kushina and Kurenai snicker and boo at Minato and Kakashi tries to suppress his snort, to no avail. 

Minato sighs, in a very put-on way. “They are so terrible. Can you imagine, they are discussing hair-cuts with me.” He leans in, expression mock-horrified. “For me.”

Kakashi chuckles, hearing Obito behind him almost choke on his drink.

He throws an amused look back, and then returns his gaze to Minato. Toasting him. “Well, you are looking somewhat shaggy by now.”

Minato opens his mouth in mock-rage, silently, the long blonde hair flowing and falling way past his shoulders now.

Kushina chortles. “Right?” She flips her own, extremely long red hair back. “Now, I mean, if you had my hair…”

Minato glowers at her, with a put-on pout. “And what does that mean.”

Kurenai hides her snicker in her glass.

 

Naruto pipes up, tone dripping with sarcasm. “It means, Dad, that you look like one of Kakashi’s dogs.”

Kakashi turns around, to a chorus of ‘oooohhhhhhhs’ and snickers, pointing a finger. “Oh no, my ninken are kept way better.”

Naruto’s sparkling eyes find his, punching into him.

Naruto clears his throat, voice breathless. “Yeah, you care a lot for the ones you love.”

Kakashi blinks, instantly sober again, throat dry.

He can feel the others’ attention shift to them, too.

 

Naruto bites his lips, and then steps up to Kakashi, holding out a package for him to take. “Here… Kakashi. I… brought you something.” He swallows, and then grins, ferociously. “You’ll like it.”

Kakashi can hear Iruka snicker.

And Minato and Kushina whisper.

He turns to them, just slightly, and then back to Naruto. “I… thank you.” I don’t have a gift for you. “I wasn’t aware we were actually exchanging gifts… I mean here, now…” He trails off, feeling like an idiot.

Naruto shakes his head, with a waggle of his eyebrows. “Just me.” He nods at the package. “Open it.”

Kakashi hesitates, and then shakes the large package, hearing… nothing.

Naruto’s grin broadens.

 

Kakashi sighs.

Obito rolls his eyes. “Should I?”

Kakashi sends him a skunk-eye, and then starts to carefully rip the paper open. 

Hesitating when he feels the material, knowing suddenly. 

His eyes come up to Naruto’s, slowly.

 

Naruto leans in, voice breathless, with humor, but also with an intensity that burns. “Come on, Sensei, open it.”

Kakashi swallows, shivering, the attention of the others, them - and if he is frank he is not sure who of them he means by that - a weight at his ankle, dragging him down into a pit of embarrassment. And… he cannot name the feeling. Something that is choking him, crumbling all his very carefully set up defenses to dust. 

Defenses he knows he doesn’t need anymore.

 

Not really. 

 

Still.

 

It’s almost baffling how something so stupid, and outrageous, and ridiculous, and …

 

He pulls the plush from the wrapping.

 

 

 

The Naruto plush. 

 

 

 

There is a silence in his head, that is echoed around the room, as everyone is holding their breath. 

 

Kakashi blinks at the plush, at the wide grin that’s been stitched into its face, at the sticking up short hair that has been set in a jagged seam. 

At the wide blue eyes.

 

At a little fox curled on the plush’s stomach in red stitches.

 

 

He sniffs.

 

 

His voice is wobbly. Scratchy. “Oh man, Jiraiya would have loved this so much.”

He refuses to think will, unable to stand the hope of it.

 

Naruto’s smile is wide, and bright, and filled with sunlight. Breathless. “Right?” 

He steps up to Kakashi, his eyes burning into Kakashi’s. His voice carries this weird mix of anticipation, and nervousness, and glee. “Do you, too?”

Kakashi sniffs again, shifting to his other foot, and he shakes his head once, and then nods, trying to talk past the constriction of his throat, while running a finger through the plush’s ‘hair’. “You know I do.”

He raises his eyes, very slowly, locks them with Naruto’s. 

Cannot breathe, his vision a tunnel. 

 

Cannot think, feeling like drowning.

 

Awareness thrums between them, paired with a sudden longing so potent it makes Kakashi shiver.

 

For a long moment nothing, nothing else exists.

 

 

It is Iruka who finally speaks up, stepping between them. 

His voice is soft, gentle, his hand on Kakashi’s arm the only thing that feels real. “I bet Kakashi hasn’t eaten all day once more, hmm? Let’s eat.” He turns to Naruto, just slightly. “He needs his strength.” Naruto blinks, shifting his gaze to Iruka, and the loss of it is terrible, Kakashi’s tattoo burning. His hands clench around the plush.

 

Kushina steps up, too, one hand rubbing Kakashi’s back, over the uniform. “Come on, Kakashi. Let’s eat.” She lowers her gaze to the plush, chuckling. “It is really too cute.”

Minato hums, stepping up to her and hugging her from behind. “It really is. Seems to be perfect for cuddling.”

Naruto beams at him. “Exactly. I got a Kakashi one years ago. I figured since…” He trails off, blushing furiously.

Obito hums, reaching round Kakashi to poke at the plush. “Good thinking. Careful though, once unleashed he clings.” Kakashi blinks, and then throws a very pointed look at Obito, who just chuckles, addressing Naruto, tone salacious. “But then you’re counting on that.”

Kakashi blinks again, turning back to Naruto, who is now beet-red, and defiant. 

Crossing his arms. “Well, this is only phase 1?”

 

Kakashi’s mouth is dry. “Phase 1?” Phase ONE????

 

Naruto shrugs, with a glowering, sizzling look. 

He opens his mouth, and then closes it again, jaws working for a moment, before he finally spits the words out. Stating. “This is my life.”

Kakashi stares at him. 

 

Naruto moves in, just a bit, hand coming up slowly, very slowly, as not to spook Kakashi, reaching up and threading through Kakashi’s hair, gently. 

Naruto bites his lips, the plush now vaguely squished between them.

His eyes seem to glow, the voice deep. “This is my life, and I will live it.”

 

Kaguya laughs, gently, peeling, the sound descending like soap bubbles, bursting with clarity.

 

Kakashi turns his head, slowly, to look at her, but her eyes are fixed on Naruto.

She smiles, spreading her hands a bit. “Yes. You will.”

 

Naruto’s hand in Kakashi’s hair tightens, just a bit, make him look back.

Naruto’s eyes seem black suddenly, filled with a yearning, so close that Kakashi does not see, cannot see anything else, anyone else.

Naruto hums, pulling even more, and putting their foreheads together, in their own weird little bubble of reality. “Will you watch Hatsu-Hinode with me?” He bites his lips, his voice almost inaudible. “Later, I mean?”

 

Kakashi blinks, very slowly, drowning and desperate to, feeling light-headed. “Of course.”

 

Naruto smiles, beatifically, and then withdraws slowly, leaving Kakashi shaky and unmoored, and unsure as to the why, but not caring in the fucking slightest.

 

He watches Naruto step back and then turn towards the table, hands and arms tightly around the plush. 

Kurenai steps up to him slowly, waits until he’s turned his head to actually look at her.

She grins. “Phase one, huh.”

Kakashi exhales, and then clicks his tongue, weighing his head a bit. “I said this earlier to Yamato, but… I think I’m toast.”

Kurenai snickers.

Minato hums, stepping up to him with Kushina in a half-embrace. He reaches out to poke at the plush’s stomach. “With Kurama, too.”

Iruka pipes up. “You know, to do this properly you need to whittle little Narutos now, bake them, draw them, build them, crochet them…”

Kakashi snorts, hand clenching a bit. “No way.”

Obito hums, with a quirked eyebrow. “Crochet… them?”

Iruka turns his head, with a grin. “Oh yeah, after Naruto got his Kakashi plush it was really bad for quite a while. He did little Kakashis out of everything, and everywhere. I bet he let them lie around in other villages, too.”

Kakashi grunts, not dignifying that with a comment. 

Iruka narrows his eyes. “Though he had a Sasuke one later, too… But he didn’t make other versions of that.” He touches his front teeth with his tongue for a moment. “Juuuuuusssst little Kakashis, everywhere.”

Kakashi clears his throat, aware that he is beet-red now. “Yeah well…”

Kushina sighs, happily. “That’s so cute?”

Kakashi clears his throat.

Minato hums, shooting a look over at Naruto, who is watching them, with a bit of amused glower. “We should go over.”

Kushina giggles. “Yeah. Though it is fun to whisper conspiratorially…” She waggles her eyebrows. “And imagine you cuddling with this.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, and clears his throat again, opening his mouth, but Kurenai is faster. “I wished Asuma, Guy and I had thought of his… we used to wonder what we could do to lighten Kakashi’s burden.”

Iruka grimaces. “The Kakashi you refer to would not have cuddled with it though.” His eyes find Kakashi’s for a long moment, his voice gentling. “Not then.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, lowering his gaze for a moment. “What makes you say I will do so now?”

Obito snorts, tone dripping with sarcasm. “Yeah, believable.”

Kakashi runs his tongue over his teeth. “You helped him, didn’t you.”

Obito puts a hand to his chest, mock-hurt. “I have vowed to support you whenever I can, haven’t I?”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he snorts. “And this is helping?”

Obito leans in a bit. “With your self-imposed restraints and stupid moral high ground? Definitely.”

Minato interjects, calmly, voice suffused by humor, but also firm, grounding. “Not that we don’t appreciate your integrity, Kakashi, as you know, but if Naruto decides that he’s waited enough…” He shrugs. “Who are we to be mad at him?” He points his free thumb at Naruto. “His age, I was engaged and preparing our wedding.” He tightens his arm around Kushina’s shoulders, smiling down at her. “And here we are.”

Kushina beams up at him.

 

Kurenai hums. “And you should really watch Hatsu-Hinode with him. This is going to be an interesting year for you. For both of you.”

Kakashi swallows, unable to comment on that. 

Kaguya speaks up, gliding around and towards Naruto slowly. “It will be an interesting few years. Maybe decades.”

Kakashi blinks, and then calls after her, drily. “You mean I should just take all the relaxation I can get now?”

Kaguya’s lilac eyes sparkle. “Sleep, definitely.”

Kushina rubs her hands, almost squealing. “Ohhhhhhhh?!”

Kakashi shakes his head, a bit exasperatedly, seeing Minato do the same.

Iruka shares a look with Obito, and then clicks his tongue. “Sasuke came by the other day.”

Kakashi turns his head. “He did?”

Iruka shrugs. “Yeah, I mean, a while ago, before the mission to Kirigakure.” He hesitates, and then blushes, softly. “He none too politely asked us to continue the Uchiha lineage, too.” Iruka snorts, beet-red now. “I mean, we’d have to find a… way, but…” He trails off, clearing his throat. 

Kakashi’s eyes find his, and then switch to Obito’s, feeling wobbly, somehow. “I’m glad.”

Obito nods, and then winks at him. “Maybe we should time it properly, if possible. Shared babysitters and stuff.”

Kakashi snorts.

 

Naruto calls over, his voice carrying a sing-song note of a whine in it, quite obviously put on. “Guys, I’m starving…”

Minato sighs soundlessly. “Of course you are.”

Kakashi grins. “We should hurry lest we don’t get anything of the soup.” His eyes find Kaguya’s. “After you, Kaguya-san.”

Kaguya smirks and inclines her head, gliding over and settling on the other side of Naruto. 

Kushina reaches out, to wipe a non-existent fluff off Kakashi’s uniform. “Yes. Let us invite the new year. Let go of the past.” Her eyes find Kakashi’s. “It is time.”

Kakashi shivers. 

 

Kushina smirks and then turns to the table with Minato, Iruka and Obito following them.

Kurenai stops Kakashi, with a touch on his upper arm.

He quirks an eyebrow at her.

 

Her voice is soft, laced with pain, but also with acceptance. “Shikamaru gave me a message from him, you know.” She frowns, eyes faraway for a long moment. “I know it has been a while already… but I… Asuma wants me to be happy. To live. To find another love, if possible.” She blinks up at him. “You already know that there is a difference between recognizing the bond, and accepting it. Allowing it.” She grins, just gently. “There is also a difference between allowing it and living it.” She bites her lips, the grin turning shit-eating suddenly, red eyes sparkling. She leans in, whispering. “Living it is the best thing, Kakashi.” She inhales, deeply, resolution entering her voice. “I will honor his wish. I will find love outside bonds. I will let go of the sorrow, and the guilt.” 

She hesitates, and then prompts. “Repeat after me.”

Kakashi blinks at her.

She raises her eyebrows. “I will live the bond.”

Kakashi stares at her.

She tilts her head. “Come on. You can do it?”

Kakashi snorts softly, and then looks away for a moment, tone dry. “I will live the bond.”

Kurenai hums, reaching up to turn his head back with a finger to his chin. “And now say it like you mean it.”

Kakashi swallows, gravity seeming off suddenly. His throat seems closed off.

Kurenai inclines her head, silently prompting once more.

Kakashi’s eyes come up, slowly, going past her, to find his, with a shiver. The words are hard to shape, seeming to echo, the feeling accompanying them similar to a premonition. “I will live the bond.”

 

Kurenai smirks at him, searching his eyes. “Good.”

She claps her hands. “And now, food. Finally!”

 

She turns to the others, and Kakashi stands there for a long moment, watching them, his hands cramped on a Naruto plush, and feeling weirdly out of sorts, the image of them laughing together and preparing to let go of the past burning itself into his brain. 

 

Naruto looks up, waving at him to come over, while laughing at something Minato said, and Kakashi steps forward, as if in trance, putting the plush between them, and then settling next to Naruto… 

 

 

 

…where he belongs.

 

 

 

 

Notes:

I put a ... preliminary chapter count in. I think it'll end up somewhere in that vicinity.
So. Still a bit to go, but... *sniffs*

Chapter 54: Working the switches

Chapter Text

 

“You know, Sensei Iruka wants me, or better us, to test the genins in summer… I am considering upholding the bells tradition.”

 

Kakashi looks up from the scroll he’s reading, and at Naruto, who is comfortably stretched out on his stomach next to him, reading a book. 

Kakashi frowns, shifting to spread out his legs, leaning back against the wall, silently glad he put this huge futon mat and lots of pillows into the little room he uses for sleep, here, at the tower.

Only that, now, it’s being used by Naruto, too, and it’s… becoming more and more of a retreat, something to look forward to.

 

His smell is everywhere. 

 

Not that Kakashi is complaining.

 

It even beats having that stupid plush over in the other corner.

 

He shoots a look at Naruto, who is smirking now, eyes unseeing on the book. “What?”

Kakashi lightly clicks his tongue. “I was just wondering if you want the bells back?”

Naruto tilts his head, blinking. “My Dad’s bells?”

Kakashi hums, resisting the urge to push a strand of hair that falls into Naruto’s eyes back into place. “Yep. You repaired them and gave them to me, remember?”

Naruto shifts a bit, onto his elbow. He bites his lips, voice low. “How could I forget… They knew, after.”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Of my attraction at least.”

Naruto hums. “Our attraction. I was always aware of this energy between us.” He averts his gaze a bit, staring into space. “I just…” He shrugs. 

Kakashi’s voice is soft. “You saved me that day.”

Naruto blinks, slowly. “It was paramount.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, tone deliberately dry. “Know the feeling.”

Naruto shoots him a grin, and then hums, rolling onto his back, book and hands comfortably on his stomach. He frowns. “Isn’t it weird though how it doesn’t really feel different? And yet…?”

Kakashi frowns, too, looking down at him. 

Naruto shrugs. “I mean, it’s love, right. I have experienced love. I love you. And it’s love. And yet…” He trails off. His thumb rubs over the seal on his stomach. The book slides off, to the side. 

Kakashi’s tattoo tickles.

 

He shivers.

Naruto’s voice is a breath. “Imagine how it will feel…”

Kakashi swallows, and then clears his throat, lightly slapping Naruto’s chest with the scroll. “Bad boy.”

Naruto snickers. 

Kakashi watches him laugh, the sparkling eyes, the dust of blonde stubble glinting in the evening sun that douses them in golden light. The grinning mouth, with that small dimple, there and gone again. The way small laugh lines appear when Naruto scrunches his eyes.

 

And the need to be there, to see those wrinkles being laughed into existence is so pure, so devastatingly intense, he cannot breathe.

 

Naruto’s hand in his neck grounds him, anchors him.

Pulls him in. 

 

Kakashi inhales, a first breath, once more, when his forehead touches Naruto’s. 

 

Naruto shivers. “What is it.”

Kakashi swallows, a sound leaving him that resembles a wounded animal’s, his voice breaking. “I want it all.” He grimaces, trying to inhale as much as possible of the smell he is craving so viciously. “I need it all.” His voice drops to a whisper, rushed now, eyes unseeing on Naruto’s. “I want to see how you grow, as a man, as a Hokage, I want to see laugh lines appear, and wrinkles. I want to see you become grey, like me, I want to see how your dreams of a family turn out. I want….”

 

Naruto tilts his head, presses a long, gentle kiss to his clothed lips.

 

Effectively muting him, flatlining his brain.

 

His other hand is pulling at Kakashi’s shoulder now, pulling him down, and Kakashi goes, falling into the embrace, helplessly, his life centered around the touches. 

Naruto shifts a bit, with him, so they end up on their sides, still kissing. 

Kakashi’s right hand rests on Naruto’s waist now, gently, the scroll long since abandoned.

 

Unimportant.

 

Naruto shifts, withdraws, only enough to mumble against Kakashi’s lips, sounding breathless.“So. Are you going to wash this mask?”

Kakashi grunts, unwilling to answer, knowing he should, but aware he probably won’t.

Naruto exhales, opening his mouth to breathe hotly onto Kakashi’s. 

His voice is a rumble. “Or are you going to walk around with it tomorrow, and my scent all over you.” Naruto’s eyes find his, and the gaze punches through Kakashi, takes his breath. 

Naruto blinks, very slowly, tone even darker, now. Stating. “I’m going to sleep here, tonight. Saturate you in my smell.” He leans in, mumbling against the skin just over the edge of the mask. “I know you can smell just as well as Kiba can… but you don’t need to track anyone anymore… no-one except me.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, shuddering, trying to find some kind of emotional foothold.

Naruto grins, against his skin, and then drags the mask down, just a bit, with his teeth. Lust slams through Kakashi, the air stifling suddenly, hard to breathe. He can smell Naruto now, intensely.

Kakashi grunts, rearing back a bit, swallowing compulsively.

His voice is bothered. “Don’t.”

Naruto’s eyes glitter. There’s a bite to the words. “Want us to marry first?”

Kakashi shivers, but sends him a skunk-eye, or as much of one as he can muster. 

Naruto grins, fiercely, aggressively, eyes blue fire. 

He bites his lips. “I could topple you over, right now, and we’d end up …” He trails off, frowning. 

Kakashi swallows again. Yeah, we would.

Naruto snorts, some levity returning. He sounds vaguely surprised. “I don’t even know what to label it. Have sex? Make out? Fuck? Go at it like rabbits? Make love? Fulfill our destiny?” He hesitates, frowning. “All of it sounds wrong?”

Kakashi snorts, gently, and then reaches up to gently brush his fingers over Naruto’s cheek. 

He bites his lips for a moment. “I like ‘making love’.” 

Naruto hums, leaning into the touch, but his voice is breathless. “There are dreams I have that have nothing to do with gentleness though.”

Fuck. Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, for a long moment. 

Naruto continues, almost purring now, face nestled into Kakashi’s palm. “Though Obito says that you were very gentle with him after the battle. And not so much on your vacation.”

Kakashi exhales, voice scratchy. “I’m gonna kill him.”

Naruto snickers, gutturally. He pouts. “Sensei Iruka wouldn’t tell.” He clicks his tongue, with a sigh. 

Kakashi grunts, tone just vaguely sharp. “Want me to interview Sasuke?”

Naruto blinks, and then hums, rolling and pulling Kakashi on top of himself, the ease of the action vaguely baffling. 

Naruto sighs when Kakashi’s weight settles on him, happily.

Kakashi stares down at him, trying to ignore how their bodies fit. 

Naruto licks his lips. “Sasuke knows I like quickies. Sasuke knows I like being held down.” Naruto’s eyes are black now, staring straight into Kakashi’s soul. “Sasuke knows how to make me scream.”

Kakashi twitches, suddenly so hard he cannot think, moving just a bit to align properly.

Naruto’s breath is hard and fast, bothered, words rushed. “Sasuke was always a bit feverish, knowing he was on borrowed time.” Naruto’s throat clicks as he swallows, eyes locked to Kakashi’s. “Sasuke never turned me down.”

Naruto blinks, very slowly, voice breathless. “Your turning me down is turning me on.”

 

Kakashi shivers. 

He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “Yeah, I can feel that.”

Naruto exhales a shuddering breath. “What are you gonna do about it.”

Kakashi snarls, not answering. His fingers itch, wanting to catch Naruto’s wrists and press them to the floor. 

Naruto undulates, just slightly, fingers playing with Kakashi’s hair now, pulling softly. 

Kakashi tries to contain the moan.

Naruto gasps a laugh, exhaling shudderingly. “Or we can just talk and wait, coming untouched is becoming a distinct possibility right now.” He undulates again, their clothed groins gliding, voice scratchy. “Or, almost untouched.” His eyes widen a bit, with a gasp. “Would you walk around with the stain? You would have to, right. There are no clothes here.”

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, feeling himself leaking, pressure gathering at the base of his spine. He feels feverish, wanting this so badly he can hardly think. 

 

Pulling his last few brain cells together to talk takes a huge effort.

 

He swallows. “Sleeping will be quite hard now.”

Naruto snorts, and then snickers, teeth flashing. “Not if we take care of it?”

Kakashi snorts, too, and then shakes his head. “Nope.” He grins, and it’s easier suddenly, despite the fact that his body is screaming for release. For more. “No, I think I will just sleep on this nice, comfy, blonde body pillow I found myself. It’s even better than the plush?” He shifts, and aligns, settling on Naruto’s body with a sigh, head nestled into Naruto’s neck. 

 

 

There is a… pause.

 

 

 

Kakashi grins.

 

 

Naruto’s voice is pained. “Are you serious?”

Kakashi’s grin widens. “Something wrong, dear?” Phase two not working as planned?

Naruto’s voice is now deadpan, as dry as the desert. “Yes. You’re hip is pressing into it.”

Kakashi lightly pats Naruto’s shoulder with his left hand, before relaxing his body further, with a bit of an effort. “Enjoy it. It’ll go away after a while.”

Naruto’s hands still, and then continue their soft pulling again, voice carrying a laugh now. “You’re a fiend?”

Kakashi hums. “Just imagine how good that orgasm will be when you can finally jerk off.”

Naruto shudders beneath him and Kakashi grins.

And then the finger in his hair pull, pull his head up a bit, tilt it.

Naruto turns his head, to push their faces close once more, whispering against Kakashi’s already damp mask. “So. Do I get Minato’s bells, or not? I mean you always had them, right?” Naruto’s grin turns shit-eating, hot breath feathering over Kakashi’s mouth. “Not in the way you wanted them all those years?”

Kakashi grunts, rolling his eyes, but he feels hot, feverish. Caught. 

He snarls, behind the mask. “Nice try.”

 

Naruto stares at him, and then falls back down, relaxing his grip, with a whine. 

And a curse.

 

Kakashi chuckles, nestling back in. Speaking against the skin. “Sleep well, Naruto.”

Naruto grunts, the vibrations of his voice transmitting against Kakashi’s skin. “Yeah, as if.”

Kakashi lightly pats his shoulder again. “Patience, honey.”

 

There is a small pause, and then Naruto speaks up again, voice brittle. “Shikamaru was right. We are at the pet names stage already.” His body relaxes a bit, with an exhale, the words a whisper. “I like that.”

Kakashi smiles, pressing a damp clothed kiss against his throat. 

Whispering, too. “Yeah. So do I.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

The sound of the gong reverberates, shivering through all attendees.

 

Kakashi watches as the temple doors reopen, after over a decade. 

 

Kaguya’s long hair shifts with the breeze, her elegant fingers still holding the cloth with which she had wiped her hands. Which had been dusty after chiseling the supposedly correct version of events into the sacred stone of the shrine. 

 

Kakashi blinks, dwelling for a moment on the duality. Her and Madara. Black hair, white hair, male, female, diametric expectations and hopes for the future. The shrine now fixed by the very one who was reason for it to be altered. 

 

Kaguya inclines her head, fixing him with a sidelong gaze. Not for the first time Kakashi wonders whether she can still sense attention. Or read minds. Maybe that used to come with the power she extracted. Maybe what’s left now is the awareness when attention is fixed on her directly. 

He frowns, trying to catch a thought he can feel niggling at the back of his mind, but it slips through, vanishing, and he concentrates back on what he sees, with a blink. 

 

Itachi steps forward, with Sasuke, Obito behind them. 

 

The breeze picks up, making Kakashi’s white robes flutter. It’s cold, now, at the beginning of February.

 

Itachi turns his head, his voice soft. “The shrine has been rebuilt.”

Kakashi hums, locking their gazes. “And it is more beautiful now. The foundations are stronger.”

The corners of Itachi’s eyes crinkle, but his voice stays soft. “I can finally show it to my little brother.”

Sasuke shoots him a look, just short of rolling his eyes. “Not so little anymore.”

Kakashi blinks, turning his gaze to him, Sasuke’s eyes… solemn. 

He hums. “No. Not little at all.”

Sasuke smiles, just softly, and then turns his head away again, and Kakashi frowns, exchanging a quick look with Obito, who just quirks an eyebrow. And shrugs.

 

Kakashi sighs.

 

The priest steps down to them, extending an arm to invite them, and Kakashi nods, starting forward, postponing any thoughts about Sasuke.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi hums, taking off the hat and veil in the entranceway. “The others are already here?”

Naruto nods, fingers gliding over the marking on the hat, eyes fixed on it. “Yeah. Sasuke already sat down with Mom and Dad.” He frowns, and then hangs the hat up, before turning back to Kakashi. “I… He’s…” He trails off, with a grimace.

Kakashi nods. “I know. He’s being weird.”

Naruto grimaces. “I cannot place it. What is it? Do you think he…” He fidgets, and then shrugs. “I mean, if he met his soul-mate he would tell me, right. Tell us. So why is he so…” He trails off again, with a frustrated grunt.

Kakashi exhales softly. “Calm and collected? Almost passive?” He shrugs. “I don’t know. Probably Hinata’s and Hanabi’s calming influence.”

Naruto snorts. “Mhhh hmmm.” They share a quick look and then Naruto shrugs again, with a look towards the living room, over his shoulder. “I just… there was a part of me that’s been afraid to meet him again. I mean we…”, he grimaces, and then moves in, right into Kakashi’s embrace, and Kakashi’s heart picks up, while wondering at the ease of it, the righteousness. 

While needing to shield Naruto.

 

He resists the urge to pull him away, and out of the house.

 

Naruto’s arms come around his neck, playing with the hair in his neck. 

He smells of sun, and wind, and earth and grass, with something citrussy and a tang of leather and smoke under it, and Kakashi wants to drown in it. He inhales deeply, feels Naruto hum, soundlessly.

Naruto smiles, for just a moment, leaning in with a whisper. “I can see your nostrils flare…” He tilts his head, raising his chin, eyes glittering. “Want more?”

Kakashi blinks, and then moves his hands round Naruto’s waist, pulling him in with hands on Naruto’s lower back and a sharp tug, tilting his head to breathe against the spot just beneath Naruto’s ear.

Naruto shudders.

Kakashi rumbles the words into skin, wondering for a moment at the careless need he feels, with them just down the hall. “Always.”

Naruto whines, just softly. “Do that again.”

Kakashi grins, just a bit fiendishly. Biting the skin through his mask. Pressing Naruto to himself. “What, this?”

Naruto undulates softly, and then curses, stepping back. 

 

Kakashi lets him, hands resting on his waist now, a breath between them. 

 

Naruto licks his lips, his hands kneading Kakashi’s shoulders now. 

Stating. “You’re… I don’t know what to call it. Playing?”

Kakashi hums, watching him intently. “You’ve been pushing.”

Naruto narrows his eyes, biting his lips. “I’m always pushing.”

Kakashi snorts, and then cackles, with a grin. “True.”

Naruto grins, and then sobers again. “But you’ve been stopping me, before.” He blinks. “I mean, I know you’re receptive,…”, he blushes, and his gaze punches into Kakashi, taking his breath, “but…” 

Kakashi blinks, very slowly. Wondering at himself. “True.”

Naruto quirks his eyebrow. “But if you’re… playing now, too…”

Kakashi hums, watching the blue get rapidly swallowed by black, feeling light-headed. Yes. Why am I… playing?

 

And then he withdraws a hand from Naruto’s waist to pull down his mask, moving in, not daring to think. 

Naruto gasps, against his mouth.

 

 

Kakashi had intended for the kiss to be short, and gentle.

 

A statement.

 

 

Naruto groans, and it is anything but. 

 

Kakashi grunts, tilting his head, pushing his tongue deep, feeling Naruto shudder.

Naruto’s arms are back around his neck and shoulder, and he is supporting him now, against the wall, because Naruto’s legs are up, when did they go up?, and he is mewling into the kiss, this biting, necessary kiss, and Kakashi presses even closer, and the taste of them, there, there, this taste, oh god how I have missed it, and Kakashi shivers, tilting his head further. 

Naruto starts to suck, on his tongue.

Rhythmically.

 

Tightening his legs in matching rhythm.

 

Kakashi shudders, unable to think, his hips moving, hands on Naruto’s thighs.

Growling into the kiss now, teeth biting lips, and he moans, sharply, when Naruto’s fangs draw blood. Naruto mumbles something into him and then turns his head, diving back in, fingers pulling at Kakashi’s hair, sending shivers and need down his spine, while golden chakra flares, and pours down his throat, muting the pain.

 

Tasting like… Kakashi cannot place it, greedily swallowing down what Naruto pushes into him, shivering all over. He licks along Naruto’s tongue now, and the sharp fangs, hearing Naruto mewl.

 

And then Naruto tightens his fingers, ripping his mouth away and tugging Kakashi’s head back, blood-and-spit-smeared lips red and glistening. The eyes are golden red, pupils crossed, and Kakashi stares at him, unable to think. 

Naruto snarls, voice breathless. “I know why you’re playing, now.” He licks his lips, with a shudder. Stating, again. “You’re staking your claim.”

Kakashi shudders, too, his thoughts sluggish. I guess I am. Minato, Kushina and Sasuke are here, and they know.

Naruto blinks, very slowly, and then tightens his legs further, rolling his hips.

Kakashi feels himself tighten, dangerously close.

Naruto grins, fangs flashing. “I can smell you…” He groans, undulating, and then hisses, with another roll of his hips. “They will be able to smell you, too. I will smell like you to them.” He licks his lips. “I will taste you, on every bite I swallow.” He smiles, beatifically, leaning in. “I poured some of my chakra into you.” He swallows noisily. “I guess that will have to suffice for now.”

Kakashi blinks, and then pushes his nose in and along the column of Naruto’s throat.

Remembers Shion, so long ago.

 

Feels Naruto tilt his head, silently. 

Asking, silently. Waiting. 

 

Knowing.

 

Kakashi bites into the meat of it, not breaking the skin, but bruising it, deeply. Sucking on it. Knowing whatever bruise he is creating will vanish again, soon.

 

But not that soon.

 

Naruto laughs around a deep moan.

Pressing him close.

 

Kakashi feels feverish, trying to pinpoint why, while still licking along the skin, his thoughts racing.

 

What happened just now?

Why did it happen?

 

What…

 

Naruto hums, and then lowers his legs, slowly, pulling Kakashi’s head back, gently now.

His eyes glitter. “You’re thinking too much.”

 

The words come, from deep within Kakashi’s soul, the taste of Naruto’s skin still running amok on his tongue. “I want to crawl into your soul.”

 

Naruto blinks, and then moves in, pressing an open-mouthed kiss over Kakashi’s mouth, sharing breath. Making him shudder. 

Naruto’s words are a hiss. “Keep that thought.”

 

And he withdraws again, with a sigh, turning towards the living room, giggling when he adjusts himself, with a burning gaze back.

 

And then walks into the room with his parents, and his ex-lover, smelling like raunchy almost-sex and carrying a hickey, with his head held high.

 

 

Kakashi swallows, compulsively, tasting… that taste again. 

 

Knowing all he will taste on every bite of food will be Naruto, too. 

 

 

He inhales, deeply, the air saturated by their shared pheromones, tasting vaguely metallic.

Surprising himself by the vivid fantasy of going in there, kneeling down next to Naruto and pulling his head back and up, to continue their kiss.

 

He closes his eyes, willing himself to calm a bit.

 

And then he follows Naruto into the living room, head held high, and Sasuke’s eyes are glued to the hickey on Naruto’s throat, and Kakashi sits down, slowly, silently.

 

 

 

Kushina’s eyes glitter. 

 

 

Minato’s voice carries something Kakashi cannot place. “Looks like the rules have changed.”

Sasuke’s voice is dry, calm, his eyes still glued to Naruto’s throat. “As anticipated.”

Kakashi makes himself speak. “You anticipated this?”

Sasuke clicks his tongue, his purple eyes finding Kakashi’s, eventually. “I have.”

Kushina turns her head, to look at him. Whispering. “How does that make you feel?”

 

And Sasuke inhales, deeply, the word seemingly coming from the depths of his soul. “Relieved.”

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, feeling something deep within in himself relax.

 

 

 

Yeah. So am I.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“I… must say, I had anticipated another reaction, earlier.”

 

Sasuke hums, shooting him a sideways look, and then shrugs, while walking alongside Kakashi, easily. “And it would have been different, before.”

Kakashi frowns, sending him a look, deeply grateful that Minato and Kushina had taken Naruto for a walk, ignoring Naruto’s protests. “Before?”

Sasuke hums, silent for a long while, watching the people around.

When he speaks again, his words come with a shrug. “Before the trip.”

 

Kakashi blinks, and then clicks his tongue. “You don’t want to tell.”

There is a small smile on Sasuke’s face, there and gone again. “Not really.”

Kakashi nods, with a shrug. “Fair enough.” He quirks an eyebrow. “You do know that I would be able to take it if you would decide to… yell at me.”

Sasuke chuckles, with a sidelong glance. “I know.” He sobers, slowly, eyes unseeing on their surroundings once more. “That is part of it.”

Kakashi frowns. “That I can take it?”

Sasuke hums, weighing his head. “You, he… others.”

Kakashi blinks, and then snorts, shaking his head. “You’re doing this on purpose.”

Sasuke’s teeth flash, for just an instant. “What gave me away?”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, while enjoying himself, immensely. “Ha ha.”

 

Sasuke grins, and then raises his head, to look up at the Hokage heads, tone wistful. “I used to dread the prospect of him up there… the prospect of seeing him there, every day.” He shoots Kakashi a look, with a shrug. “I used to ponder that, you know… Orochimaru told me who your Sensei was. And I realized you must have… been hurting, continuously. Seeing the stone head, seeing him… the spitting image of Minato.” He inhales, deeply. “When I came back, I felt like I was wearing blinkers. All my hopes and desires were focused on him.” He snorts. “And I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep him.” Sasuke’s jaw works for a moment, the muscles in it jumping. Kakashi tries not to breathe.

Sasuke exhales, with a shake of his head. “I’m really… appreciative of how hard you have been fighting. To give me the time with him.” Sasuke blinks, turning his head to look at Kakashi. “You were there, then. At the bridge. You could have interrupted.”

 

Kakashi swallows, harshly, and then nods, once.

Sasuke hums. “I stared at the sea in Kirigakure, and I decided I wanted to be a man like that.”

Kakashi stares, unable to do anything else. Like… me?

He’s vaguely aware that they’ve stopped in the middle of the street somewhere, and that people are passing, but he doesn’t care, all his senses trained on Sasuke. 

Sasuke smirks, softly. “Pain brings strength. Those who bear pain know they can endure.” He nods to himself, quirking an eyebrow. “Of course it helps to have valid hope.”

Kakashi blinks, his voice almost inaudible. “You have valid hope?”

 

Sasuke leans in, eyes glittering. Grinning, fiendishly. “Nice try.”

 

Kakashi chuckles, and then snorts, shaking his head, and Sasuke smirks, before starting back down the road, and Kakashi stares after him, until he’s gone, swallowed by the crowds of afternoon Konoha, and he feels light, so light. 

 

And so, so glad.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“Ready for the run? Kurama is literally itching to get out.”

 

Kakashi grunts, unclasping his armor. “I’m sorry, but we have to wait until we’re out of Konoha. In time, I bet they’ll get used to Kurama, maybe even the others, but for now… a lot of people remember still, vividly.”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “Yeah, I know.” He claps his hands, and then rubs them. “So, are you ready?”

Kakashi puts the armor down, with a small grin. “Think you can keep up?”

Naruto grins, fiendishly, waggling his eyebrows. “Ohhhhhh, a challenge.”

Kakashi chuckles, under his breath, while watching the blue eyes burn at him. “Yeah, well, we’ll see. Being stuck behind the desk is not doing me any favors.”

Naruto snorts, and then steps up, placing his hand onto Kakashi’s shirt, over his stomach. 

 

Just like that.

 

Kakashi tries not to react too much.

 

Naruto grins. “I guess that will be my job then?” He bites his lips. “To keep you in form?”

Kakashi hums, feeling his stomach flip. “I heard you wanted to take it…”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, eyes unseeing on his own hand. “And I do.”

His hand drops, just a little bit lower.

 

Kakashi clears his throat, stepping back just a bit. “Glad that’s settled then.”

Naruto clicks his tongue, and then opens the window in their room, hopping onto the sill. He shoots a look back over his shoulder. “Race ya to the gates.”

Kakashi chuckles, and then shakes his head, once. “You’ll be the death of me.”

Naruto’s voice is breathless. “I’ll try… “ He grins. “But what a way to go, huh?”

 

And he’s gone, and Kakashi snorts, and then climbs out the window with a sigh, stretching on the roof for a moment. 

 

And then he races after Naruto, giggling to himself, and the breeze carries the scent of spring in it, and for a moment Kakashi’s thoughts are with her, and she’s dancing through the flowers, her laughter is like chimes, in the wind. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi is panting, the sweat dripping off his forehead. “There’s no Anbu around…”

 

Naruto gasps for breath, shaking his head, surrounded by Kakashi’s pack, who have simply flopped onto the ground, panting. “No, I…”, he gesticulates towards Kurama, “I asked Sensei Yamato to just leave us alone.” He swallows, and then exhales, in a rush, before straightening up. “I mean, between us, your pack, and Kurama we should be fine, right.”

 

Kakashi nods, bent over with his hands on his knees, with a snort. "I sure hope so.“ He looks over at Kurama, who‘s flopped onto his back, tails spread, and legs in the air. He grins. "Though our big demon fox seems out for the count.“

Kurama growls, but doesn’t move an inch and Kakashi snickers, dropping onto the ground next to him, feeling weirdly… easy. 

His eyes catch Naruto’s for a split second. Right. It’s because I trust Naruto. And Kurama… is his. He smirks. 

 

Pakkun nudges him, lazily jumping off Bull, who seems to be through with the world. "Boss? Have you decided in regards to the trip?“

Kakashi frowns, wiping his forehead. "Trip?“

Naruto interjects, waving his hand. "Oh sorry, I asked them a while ago if they wanted to come Uzushiogakure with us…“ 

Kakashi blinks, shooting a look at his pack, who are all looking at Naruto, and then turning to him. "Well, I don’t mind… any specific reason though?“

Naruto grimaces a bit. "Well, I…“ He exhales, and then shrugs. "You remember the scrolls at the Uzumaki shrine? I… I spoke to Mom, and Yui-san, at the administrative office, right, and they said there’s likely a lot of… scrolls still buried there, under the ruins.“ He shrugs. "I wondered if your pack might be able to find something.“

Kakashi hums. "The Uzumaki were feared for a reason. Anything we could use still… would probably help, later on.“

Naruto nods, with a broad, relieved smile. "Exactly.“ He pokes Kurama, lightly. "And my own familiar wasn’t very appreciative of the idea.“

Kurama grunts, and then swats Naruto’s hand away, with a tail. Naruto snickers. 

Kakashi grins, and then turns to Pakkun, with a quirked eyebrow. "And you, manifesting without me knowing?“

Pakkun yawns. "Well, you said he’s kin? Quite a while ago even?“

Kakashi hums, and then hugs Pakkun to himself for a moment, letting a proud gaze travel over his pack. "That I did. Yes.“

Naruto hums, smile a bit wobbly. "I remember. It made me so happy.“ His voice drops, to a broken whisper. "I felt so loved.“

Kakashi sniffs, and then scoots over just a bit, opening his arms, silently. 

Naruto swallows and sniffs, and then moves over, settling in his arms, laying on the ground. 

 

Kakashi wriggles until they’re spread out in the middle of his pack, next to a dozing bijou, and Naruto’s hair tickles, and a cool breeze dries the sweat on their skin, slowly. 

 

Kakashi falls asleep, with Naruto’s lips pressed to his throat, feeling utterly safe and… free. 

 

And so, so loved. 

 

 

 

 

*****

 

 

 

 

Naruto hops over a small stone, laughing when Kurma does, too, with a flip-over mid air. 

"Nice!“

Kurama grins, and then trots on, rather happily, falling into a slow jog next to Pakkun, who is grumpily running himself this time, after Bull suggested none too gently that he should get off. 

Kakashi guesses that Pakkun demanding Bull run faster might have had something to do with that. 

He snickers. 

 

Naruto closes up to him, sending him a smile, like sunshine, and Kakashi grins back, unable not to. 

 

Naruto leans in, whispering. "You know, being celibate is weird…“ He clears his throat, sending Kakashi a searing look. "After several years of, you know, and the prospect…“ He licks his lips and Kakashi swallows, harshly. Naruto’s voice is carrying somewhat of a whine now. “I mean, the build up is killing meeeee….”

Kakashi laughs out, loudly, and then snickers, just a bit evilly. “Turnabout is fair play, dear.”

Naruto snorts, and then rolls his eyes. 

Leaning in, with gleaming eyes. “You know, I mean, in the meantime… I have to make do with my clones, right.”

 

Kakashi’s laughter dies in his throat, a slow, painful, and very thorough death.

He shivers.

 

Naruto licks his lips again, watching him.

 

Leaning in even more to whisper, in a voice that is definitely loud enough for Kakashi’s pack. “I mean, we’re in phase two now, aren’t we… but one has to be prepared, right.”

 

Right. Kakashi croaks, ignoring the looks he gets from his familiars. “Phase two?”

 

Naruto hums, easily jumping over a log. “Yeah. Phase one was gifts, and hearsay. Testing the waters… phase two is closeness.” His eyes find Kakashi’s once more, burning. “Teasing. Talking. Getting used to the touch and presence.” He grins, for a moment, before biting his lips again. “But phase three…”

 

Kakashi swallows, trying not to stumble, his feet feeling uncoordinated. 

 

He doesn’t need to ask what phase three is, thank you very much.

He closes his eyes, for just a moment. You went and discussed this with people. Discussed how to break that last barrier between us down. You planned breaking it down. Have whittled away at it, for months now. 

Asked Obito what I like.

 

Kakashi cannot breathe.

 

When he reopens his eyes again, Naruto’s eyes are black, the iris just a thin blue ring.

His voice is not something Kakashi recognizes, underlaid with a growl. “I am anticipating phase three.” He grins suddenly, fangs flashing. “Working the switches, now, as they say at that new railroad that’s being built.” 

 

Over to the side, Kurama’s red eyes glitter, in the sun, over a fiendish grin.

 

Kakashi blinks, slowly, remembering his discussion with Tenzou, a while ago.

 

 

Oh yeah. I’m toast.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Obito grins at him, watching him look over to where Kushina and Naruto are training in the distance for the umpteenth time. 

He throws a pebble at Kakashi, hitting him square in the chest, the small stone dropping to the ground with a little bounce. “This kind of distractedness will get you killed in combat, you know?”

Kakashi grunts, reaching for the pebble unseeing, and throwing it back, hitting Obito’s shoulder. 

He clicks his tongue. “I’m not… distracted.”

Obito snorts. “Right. You’re only watching them for entertainment value. While supposedly training with me.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, just a bit, letting his vague annoyance color his tone. “Aren’t you interested to see this happen, too? I mean, last time you were injured, and had to leave, right. Granted, this time Kurama will allow them to use the chains for training, but…”

Obito hums, abandoning his fighting stance to step a bit closer. “Right. It’ll be quite the sight to see the full nine-tails silhouette once more, roaring.”

Kakashi shivers, and then nods. “Exactly. I issued a statement, as you know. “

Obito nods, stepping up to him, and watching now, too. “Good thinking, that.”

Kakashi hums, noncommittally. 

 

There is a pause.

 

Obito’s voice carries his grin. “So I hear phase two is going well?”

Kakashi works his jaw for just a moment, and then rolls his eyes. “I think we’re almost at phase three.” He shoots Obito a look, catches the dark gaze for a long moment. “As you probably know…”

Obito grins, fiendishly.

Kakashi harrumphs.

Obito bumps into him, softly. “It’s about damn time, too, bakakashi.”

Kakashi grumbles, under his breath. “You told him I was gentle with you after the war, and not so much on our trip?”

Obito’s grin broadens, impossibly, teeth flashing. “Yeah, I mean… you were?”

Kakashi shakes his head, a bit exasperated. “I really don’t know how to feel about all that, you know?”

Obito snorts. “About all the threads of fate around you?”

Kakashi grunts. “I would have said about my ex lovers talking to my future one before we even become lovers, but… yeah. I guess.” He falls silent for a long moment, watching something red and energetic in the distance, next to something blond. He hums. “You and Naruto get along quite well.”

Obito preens a bit. “Right?” 

Kakashi’s tone carries a note of wistfulness. “Never thought that would happen.” He hesitates. “Hoped for, vaguely, maybe.” He shakes his head, sending Obito a sidelong look. “But to see it happen…”

Obito sobers, just a bit. “Yeah.” The grin spreads again. “He’s quite irresistible. I mean, he’s a force of nature. I…” He hesitates, and then shrugs. “I decided to trust him because of you, as you know.” Obito sobers, slowly, and Kakashi watches him, from the corner of his eyes. 

Obito lifts his eyebrows. “Back then, at the inn, I wanted to convince myself… because even then…” He smirks, with a shake of his head. “So, you know, it all became quite easy once I approached him, for, you know…”

Kakashi grunts. “For the little pranks you pull on poor Iruka?”

Obito’s eyes flash, with a short, little laugh. “Iruka loves them, thank you very much.” He smirks. “But yes. And Naruto loves them, too.” Obito winks at him. “The plush was my idea.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Of course it was.”

Obito snickers. “He wanted to give you a Minato one, too, the little imp.”

Kakashi blinks, and then turns his head, to look at Obito. “And you… told him not to?”

Obito shrugs, with a snicker. “I told him that might throw phase two back a few steps since you’re so good with mortification.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “I’m not ‘good’ with mortification, wha…”

Obito interjects, tone dry. “You want to tell me you would not feel watched.”

Kakashi falls silent, averting his gaze again to look over to where the red dot and the blond dot seem to be still talking.

Obito hums, happily pushing. “I mean, it’s bad enough they’re here, and anticipating you getting a move on, right.”

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, for a long moment. “Maybe?”

Obito snickers. 

 

Kakashi sighs, deeply. 

 

Obito watches him, like a hawk. “He told me you didn’t want to visit your old house with him, a while back.” He narrows his eyes. “Why.”

Kakashi swallows, keeping his gaze firmly averted. 

He hesitates for a long moment, before finally answering, tone deliberately lofty. “None of your damn business, Obito.”

Obito narrows his eyes.

Kakashi sighs, deeply. “I just think that if we’re alone, like that, there, that…”

Obito steps up, right into his field of vision, the dark eyes glittering. Tone breathless.“Ohhhhhhhh?”

Kakashi grunts, reaching out to push him out of his sight, matter-of-factly. “Shut up.”

Obito snickers, letting himself pushed over. “I see.” He swallows, and then clicks his tongue, retaking his position next to Kakashi, with a little hum. “I’m glad.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Yeah, well, I mean… after our kind of build-up…”

Obito nods, tone definitely amused. “True, that.”

Kakashi sighs, deeply, repeating. “Shut up.”

Obito laughs, gutturally. “No way.”

 

He reaches out, and pulls Kakashi into a half-embrace, silently after all, though still snickering, and Kakashi leans in for a moment, enjoys the instance of closeness and camaraderie, of love.

 

 

In the distance Kurama’s nine tails block out the sun, and chains that seem dark in the shadows swish through the air, find their goal.

 

 

In his memory, Kakashi hears Kurama roar.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“So, he can use the chains now?”

 

Kushina nods, leaning in a bit, her dark blue eyes finding Kakashi’s. “He can, though he still needs too much chakra to release them, but that’s a matter of training.” She blinks, shooting a look over her shoulder to where Naruto and Minato are talking to Obito, before lowering her voice. “His chains are stronger thank mine.”

Kakashi blinks, watching her closely. “And that… surprises you?”

Kushina nods. “Yes. I am full Uzumaki, my chains should be strongest, no matter his other powers. I mean, I can survive extraction, right. But his chains… are different.”

Kakashi frowns. “Different?”

Kushina nods again, turning to look at the three, her voice still low. “Yes. The material is different.”

Kakashi blinks. “Hashirama’s cells.”

Kushina hums. “That’s what I think, too.” She shoots Kakashi a look. “The cells were absorbed while he was transforming into the fox, right. If they fused with his cells he might have access to them even beyond sheer jutsus.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “That’s probably why he wasn’t really able to get the wood release to work despite training with Sensei Yamato. Despite the fact that the cells were incorporated into him, it’s different for Naruto because of the fox. The cells have blended with Kurama, too.”

Kushina quirks an eyebrow. “Right.” She blinks, staring at them unseeing. “I wonder if Kurama is aware.”

Kakashi shoots her a look. “You don’t want to ask directly?”

Kushina weighs her head. “I think I’ve annoyed Kurama enough for one day. Or a week, or a month.” She grins at Kakashi, a bit wryly. “He grumpily let us train today, but he was not happy.”

Kakashi grimaces. “Yeah, I can empathize.” He sighs, through his nose. “Still. We need to check with him.”

Kushina nods. “Yes. But wait a few days.” She puts her hand on Kakashi’s forearm for a moment, and then starts walking towards the small group over to the side, and Kakashi watches her go, watches as Naruto’s eyes find his, with the thrum, this feeling that he needs now, just as much as breathing.

 

Maybe more.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

Kakashi watches her wipe the blackboard, remembering the little prank they pulled on him, all those years back.

 

Her voice draws him out of his thoughts. “So, Sensei, want to come in and help me clean up?”

Kakashi grins, sauntering in with his hands in his pockets. “Not really.”

Sakura shoots him a grin. “Just here for your break? Naruto’s not here, he’s out with his team.”

Kakashi sends her an eye-smile, while leaning back on a desk. “I know. It’s why I came by today.”

Sakura turns to him, wiping her hands. “No risk of getting distracted.”

Kakashi snorts. “Astute as always.” He nods at her. “How are you?”

Sakura lifts her eyebrows, sighing just a bit, before smirking. With a shrug. “I… am so fine?” She spreads her hands. “Teaching is so much fun, we have so many kids interested in learning basic healing skills now, and, I mean fair’s fair… Naruto’s method of teaching throwing kunais and shuriken is so incredibly successful I’ve adopted it, too, and it’s a hoot?!” She snickers, and he chimes in, for a moment. 

She clicks her tongue. “And everything else…” She blushes, just a bit. “It’s coming along well, too.”

Kakashi nods, slowly, letting his sincerity color his voice. “I’m glad.”

Sakura hums, stepping over, and leaning back on the desk too, next to him. 

She lowers her voice, just a bit. “Itachi always comes by with bento boxes for lunch when he’s not teaching, too. If he is, we go for take-out together, but if he brings them we’re often doing a picnic at the park.” She smirks. “Obito and Sensei Iruka are often there as well.”

Kakashi smirks. “Yeah, I heard he’s ramped up the romance.”

Sakura snickers. “Oh yes. Sensei Iruka is thriving on it.” She blushes, sending him a vaguely panicked look. “I mean, I don’t mean to imply he wasn’t when you two were…” She trails off.

Kakashi waves her off. “Mahhh, mahh, easy, Sakura-chan. I am simply happy for them, no hard feelings in any way, trust me.” 

 

Sakura nods, and then exhales, with a shrug. “Sensei Iruka has taken us under his wings, as you know.” She smirks, just a bit. “It’s weird sometimes, because we’re often sitting in the teacher’s room with him, and Naruto, and Minato, and Kushina, and Itachi, and Anko, and Guy and…” She chuckles, and Kakashi chimes in.

She shoots him a look. “Naruto really loved the fact that you already announced the teams. Giving him Yuukimaru really boosted both his and the boys’ spirits.”

Kakashi hums, with a small grin. “Yeah, Yuukimaru did quite well, skipping those classes.” He leans in a bit. “But it was also a concession to Guren, she wanted someone she also trusted.” He shrugs. “Win-win.”

Sakura nods. And then picks at a non-existent fluff on her pants. “I heard you refused to give Konohamaru’s team the number 7?”

Kakashi blinks, and then averts his gaze, looking unseeing out of the window. “I am aware you’re currently not on active roster anymore, but…” He trails off.

Sakura waits for a moment, and then prompts, softly. “But?”

Kakashi works his jaw for a long moment, and then turns his head, to lock his gaze with her green one. “The current team 7 is not done yet.” His throat feels constricted, something shivering through him. “And neither is the old one.”

Sakura blinks at him, a bit owlishly. “Alright…?”

Kakashi shrugs. “I don’t know how to put it. It’s just a gut feeling.” The vision of Kaguya’s red lips, over sharp little teeth. He forces a smile. “Time will tell.”

 

Sakura blinks, and then averts her gaze, staring out of the window for a long moment, too.

 

Her voice carries a fierceness that sends a shiver down Kakashi’s spine. “Well. I won’t let anyone take my future from me.” She hesitates, adding after a  moment, steel in her voice. “Sensei.”

 

Kakashi blinks, slowly, and then smiles grimly. Proudly.

 

 

No. You won’t.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“So, when you’re back I’ll be gone… that sucks.”

 

Kakashi hums. “I’m only going to be away for a short time. As you know they repaired the airship, and the trip to Kirigakure is only going to take a few days thanks to it.”

Naruto pulls a face. “Yeah, I don’t know how I feel about you flying again.”

Kakashi keeps his voice gentle. “I don’t think there’ll be another terrorist attack.”

Naruto looks away, gaze sullen.

Kakashi tilts Naruto’s face back, with a finger under his chin, remembering how it felt when someone did this with him. “I’ll be fine. I’m taking Sai with me, as you know. Sensei Yamato insisted, too. Sai can conjure flying objects. It will be fine. Besides, Sensei Guy is coming with, too.”

Naruto harrumphs, and then snarls, a bit. “Why can’t I come with?”

Kakashi grins, just gently. “Middle of year school conference? And then the trip to Uzushiogakure?”

Naruto groans, and then hisses. “As much as I love teaching, the conferences are a pest.”

Kakashi chuckles, leaning in to press a kiss to his temple. “Get used to them, honey. As Hokage there’ll be more.”

He turns away, hearing the pout in Naruto’s voice. “Great.”

 

Kakashi reaches for his hat, but Naruto pulls him back, by his forearm.

 

His voice is soft. “Can I get a kiss?”

 

Kakashi blinks, turning to him, his heart hammering suddenly. 

Naruto steps up to him, slowly, hand gliding up to hook around Kakashi’s neck. 

Naruto breathes against Kakashi’s mask. “Pretty please?”

Kakashi swallows. “I’ll be late.”

Naruto grins, sharply. “You’re always late.” He sobers, biting his lips. “Besides. It’s my prerogative to make you late.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, tingling all over. “Right.” His hands find Naruto’s waist, easily. 

Naruto sighs, stepping up even closer, his other hand around Kakashi’s shoulder, under the robes. He whispers, need clearly in his voice. “Kiss me. Make me miss you.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, feeling Naruto move in even more, align them.

He lifts his chin, offering. Prompting.

Naruto’s eyes flash.

 

Accepting, naturally.

 

Naruto’s teeth scratch his skin when he drags down Kakashi’s mask with them.

 

Kakashi tilts his head down, slowly.

Naruto shivers, his mouth dropping open.

 

The sense of heat, a hair’s breadth away.

His pulse, hammering against Naruto’s palm.

 

Kakashi opens his mouth, just a bit, touches the tip of his tongue against Naruto’s lower lip.

Naruto jerks, and then giggles-curses, eyes dropping shut, and Kakashi moves in, with a snicker, kissing him, deeply, wildly, wetly, with a moan, and delight. 

 

Naruto shudders and then bites Kakashi’s tongue, gently, while exploring freely, sighing happily. 

Stubble catches, on sensitive lips.

Naruto pulls Kakashi in, even deeper.

 

The wall catches them, and Naruto giggles in to the kiss, turns them, pressing into Kakashi now. 

 

Withdrawing, slowly, breathlessly, accentuating each word with a peck, and a slow roll of his hips. “No… permission… to… play… this… time… Kakashi.”

Kakashi grunts, following him, stealing another deep kiss, before Naruto separates them, a bit wildly, and with force.

Gasping, against Kakashi’s lips. “I mean it.” His eyes flash. “Your hunger is mine now.”

Kakashi blinks, very slowly, trying to think, dammit. 

He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “As you wish.”

 

Naruto leans in, to press another kiss to his lips, closed-mouth this time. 

Snickering. “Good boy.”

 

Kakashi growls. 

 

Naruto steps back, slowly, hands gliding. 

He hovers in front of Kakashi, for a moment, eyes glittering. “And then, when we’re back… Sakura’s and Itachi’s wedding.” He reaches up, gently rights the veil. “And the next big step for us.”

Kakashi blinks, some sense returning, watching him closely. 

He keeps his voice soft, light. “That a fact?”

 

Naruto hums, moving in to pull up Kakashi’s mask, slowly. Gently.

 

His voice carries something that punches into Kakashi. “Yes.”

 

 

And Kakashi exhales, slowly.

 

 

 

 

Yes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

He reads the scroll thrice, his hand shaking when he lowers it, eventually.

Shizune grins at him, broadly. “She did it.”

 

And he grins, helplessly, feeling dangerously unmoored. “She did.”

 

 

 

 

Chapter 55: Force of nature

Notes:

OMG - one whole year of this fic, to the day. What a journey it’s been??? And we’re still on it? *Laughs* I hope you will enjoy the chapter on this anniversary!! The upcoming milestone (next chapter^^) is matching (unplanned^^) quite well?^^

 

And: Read an interesting theory a while back in regards to Uzushiogakure. Makes a lot of sense imho, so I adopted parts/the theory of it. (https://animebase.me/threads/theory-the-destruction-of-the-uzumaki-village-uzushiogakure.326559/)

Also: not going here the way of “Blood in my veins” for those who have read that, just needed the… hook :) And it -is- possible in this verse :P

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi watches Mei pass the hat to Chujoro, her fingers tracing the edge for just a moment, before putting it onto his head.

He smiles to himself, imagining, and then frowns, deeply. But I do doubt I’ll be able to pass the hat to him while his parents are here, still. If we’re lucky they have another five years. It’s already been almost two, and chances are… He stops his own thoughts, refocusing on Mei, and Guy, who is sitting behind her now, beaming.  

Mei seems to sense his gaze, looking over from beneath the lock of red hair that’s fallen into her eyes, with a wink.

Kakashi smirks. 

 

The crowds cheer, and Kakashi raises his hands, starts to give applause with the others, for a speech he hasn’t really heard.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

She grins at him, right hand on Guy’s shoulder, left hand holding a flute of champagne. “You weren’t listening, earlier.”

Kakashi grunts, and then nods, glad that the white robes and veil hide him and his vague blush from most eyes. “True. I was thinking about time, and its passing.”

Guy raises his own glass, with a broad grin. “You have to seize the day while your youth lasts.”

Kakashi snorts. “Mhh hmmm.” He takes a glass of champagne from a passing waiter, toasting him with a sigh. “You did?”

Mei smirks. “We did.” She looks down at Guy for a moment, who reaches up to squeeze her hand, and then shrugs. “If it is alright with you, Hokage-sama, I would request the permission to live in Konohagakure.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly. Grins to himself. “Not just… visiting anymore?”

Mei rolls her eyes, just a bit. “It would be impractical. Besides…” She leans in a bit, lowering her voice. “I think Chujoro is looking forward to me getting out of his hair.”

Kakashi chuckles, sending a look over to the young kage, who is still going through a long line of people wanting to congratulate him. 

He clicks his tongue. “How could I possibly refuse to have another kage living with us?” He bows his head, just slightly. “It would be our honor.” Another kage, at our disposal. He forces the uneasiness coming with the thought down. “I believe we can find you… two a bigger accommodation if you so wish.”

Guy beams at him. “We have already found one, Kakashi, but thank you.”

Kakashi blinks, quirking an eyebrow. “Oh?” He sniffs, exaggeratedly. “You mean I would have come by and you would have been gone?” He presses his hand to his chest, sighing dramatically. “My heart.”

Mei snickers.

Guy’s voice is wobbly. “I will never be gone, my rival.”

Kakashi blinks, and then sobers, reaching out to squeeze Guy’s right shoulder, tone gentle. Meaning it, with all his soul. “I sure do hope so.”

 

Mei watches them, and then hums, after a moment. “A propos gone - what did Uchiha Sasuke say when he returned? I must say, it took us all by surprise.” 

Kakashi narrows his eyes, remembering Sasuke’s strange behavior. “Say? Not much.” He shoots Mei a look. “I only know that something happened, and that he’s… different now, after the trip. Settled.”

Mei’s eyebrows climb up. “He hasn’t told?”

Kakashi grimaces. “I think he doesn’t on purpose.”

“Oh?” Mei hesitates, swirling the champagne in her glass for a moment. “I wonder if I should tell, then?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “If… it is what I think it is he won’t be able to keep who from us for long… except maybe if it is as complicated as my own.”

Mei shakes her head, the red lock shifting to reveal both eyes for a moment. “Oh, no, it isn’t. Not quite that complicated at least. Though it does come with its own… ties.” She lifts the champagne to her lips. “But he did seem to be relieved.”

Kakashi snorts. “Hell, both Naruto and I were relieved, too?”

Guy raises a fist to the heavens. “Seeing their love bloom like this is beauty incarnate.”

 

Kakashi frowns, watching him for a moment. “You’ve… seen?”

Guy blinks at him, fist still in the air. “Yes? They returned together after all?”

Kakashi stares at him, nonplussed. “But Sasuke returned with Hinata and Ha…” He trails off. Hanabi? Hyuuga Hanabi??

Mei chuckles, gently, and then sighs, with a shrug. “I have to say, Hyuuga Hanabi has grown into a strong, irreverent, funny and rather … fun-loving young woman.”

Kakashi’s gaze travels to her, slowly. “They… recognized the bond?”

Mei weighs her head, with a small smile. “I think there was a certain awareness between them already when they arrived here. I was showing them around, and we went and visited one of the waterfalls, and Hanabi-san twirled in its spray, and there was this instance… she turned and smiled at him, as beautiful as the sun. I looked at him. And he was smitten. Stunned. Totally floored.” She grins broadly. “I think he recognized the bond then. He was always with her, after. And she didn’t mind.”

Kakashi blinks again, slowly. Echoing. “She didn’t mind.”

Mei rolls her eyes. “Hanabi is a force of nature, Kakashi. She’s quite aware, but she’s doing her own thing, not waiting for Sasuke to get a move on.” She takes a sip of her champagne. “Reminding you of someone, maybe?”

Kakashi grunts, staring unseeing into space. Trying to imagine. “Huh.”

Mei hums, watching him. “I think Sasuke is taking it slow, on purpose, because there’s an age gap there, too. Not as bad as yours, but…” She smirks. “I know he looks up to you. I don’t think you’ll need to worry.”

Kakashi swallows, remembering Sasuke’s words. Repeating, dumbly. “Huh.”

 

Mei blinks, tilting her head. “Thoughts?”

Kakashi opens his mouth, and then closes it again, after a moment, looking at Guy who grins back, and then back at Mei, who is watching him, amusedly. 

Kakashi shrugs. “I am just floored. I… actually think that it’s a good fit? I mean, I haven’t met her in quite a while, she was living in the outskirts…” He blinks. Which explains why Sasuke didn’t meet her in Konoha. But if her personality is as Mei describes… “And of course with the plans Naruto has with Hinata and Tenten…”

Guy sniffs, loudly, while tears are streaming down his face. “You’ll be family!”

Kakashi stares into his glass of champagne, watching the threads of fate reconnect into a tightly wound net before his mind’s eye. Trying to imagine certain holidays in the future.

 

His words are carried on a rather fatalistic snort. “I need a stronger drink.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Chujoro extends the scroll to him, with a wry smile. “I’m glad to offer this to you for Suigetsu - though this is a one-time blank slate. He will need to stick to the rules if he wishes to live here.”

Kakashi hums, accepting the scroll with an incline of his head. “I believe he knows that. My thanks.”

Chujoro nods, grinning at Mei and Guy for a moment, before he looks back at Kakashi. “When do you expect them to be back?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Naruto and his… family? In two weeks. As for Tsunade… I cannot possibly say. She said she could not estimate the time she would need still. Suigetsu is staying in order to help. While he wishes to go to Uzushiogakure, too, he has decided to do so later.”

Chujoro quirks an eyebrow. “So many things have changed for the better already. Are in motion.” He blinks, a shadow passing over his face. “I have to request though that you share any… tools and knowledge resulting from the trip to Uzushiogakure.” Chujoro fidgets. “While we try to move forwards the people of Kirigakure are still the victors…” He trails off.

Kakashi clears his throat, viciously glad that Kushina isn’t here right now. 

He keeps his tone neutral. “I am aware.” He hesitates, and then adds, kindly. Carefully. “I am also aware that the Yondaime Mizukage was being controlled, then. Which makes the destruction of Uzushiogakure not wholly the responsibility… or feat of Kirigakure.”

Chujoro grimaces, and then nods. “Yes. Still. The elders have insisted I issue this demand, and…”

Kakashi hums, interjecting. “I understand.” He exhales. “In the world we wish to build communication and sharing of knowledge is paramount. So I see no reason why we should not share our findings.”

Chujoro relaxes, visibly, with a small nod. “Thank you, Hokage-sama.”

Kakashi nods, too, and then turns to Mei, who is watching him, silently, with an ocean of emotions in her eyes, swirling. She must have been young still, when the village was destroyed. Likely killing her mother’s side of the family. Which in turn made her willing to join the alliance, later. He smirks, a bit bitterly. And so the wheels turn, through bone and blood, and ash.

He turns back to Chujoro. “Mizukage-sama. It has been a very nice stay, thank you for inviting us.”

Chujoro inclines his head. “Thank you for witnessing my inauguration.” He turns to Mei, and Guy behind her. “Godaime-sama. May your trip be uneventful, and your life in Konohagakure not as much. I hope you will return from time to time.”

Mei chuckles, stepping forward, and then waves at Chujoro, a bit teasingly. “Better do a good job so I don’t have to?”

A grin flits over Chujoro’s face, but his voice carries his sincerity, and gratitude. “I’ll try.”

Mei hums, and then nods, letting her eyes drift over the village behind the harbor, turning to face the air ship floating above the water in the bay after. 

She rolls her shoulders, and then starts walking towards the landing bridge, slowly, head held high, and Kakashi watches her go, towards a new life, suddenly knowing that she won’t return.

 

And he knows she knows that, too.

 

And he shivers.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

He knows he shouldn’t. 

 

It’s just that he cannot help himself. 

Not anymore.

 

Kakashi feels Naruto return, Ino’s announcement that the group has passed the city perimeters coinciding perfectly with the churning in his gut, with the need that rushes through him.

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, and reaches

 

 

 

Nothing, and the cold of space, for just an instance. 

 

 

 

… and slams into Naruto, there, next to the gates, stumbling backwards with him until they’ve hit the wooden wall, and Naruto’s giggling, and Kakashi’s breathing again, finally, that smell that he’s missed so much and which he hadn’t dared to acknowledge missing, and Kakashi is holding onto Naruto, for dear life, and then Naruto’s hands are in his hair, and on his mask, and then…

 

Kakashi sinks into the kiss, with the sense and feeling of returning home, utterly oblivious to anything around them.

 

Naruto mewls into the chaste and yet deep kiss, softly.

 

He tastes of dust, and earth, and thirst, of stale breath and fresh air, and the sun. Of dogs around them for weeks, of rations and sweat, and laughter. 

Of love, pouring into Kakashi. 

 

Kakashi holds Naruto’s face, as if he could break, offering his soul, and his need.

 

His tattoo burns.

 

 

 

 

Someone giggles.

 

 

 

Naruto smirks into the kiss, and it breaks it, just a bit, lightens the need, and they’re nipping now, playfully, before separating, just a hair‘s breadth, Kakashi letting his forehead sink against Naruto’s, with a sigh. 

Naruto’s eyes twinkle at him, from short distance, fingers still playing with Kakashi’s hair. “Hey.”

Kakashi swallows, harshly. Echoing. “Hey.”

Naruto grins. “I missed you, too.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long moment. I cannot put into words how much I did. He clicks his tongue, whispering. “I tried to ignore it.”

Naruto hums. “I bet.” He pulls softly at the hairs in Kakashi’s neck, but doesn’t separate them. “You could always reach me?”

Kakashi swallows, and then nods, minutely. “I know. But it’s…”

Naruto nods, and then moves in, to kiss him again, for just a moment, the sensation shivering through them both. “I know.”

Kakashi sniffs, and then nods, fully this time, separating them.

 

He steps back, slowly, missing Naruto’s hands in his hair immediately, and turns to the others, who are watching them, rather unabashedly, and with grins.

Kakashi tries to contain his blush. “Welcome back.”

Kushina smirks at him, tone the tiniest bit salacious. “Glad to be back.”

Minato hums, arm around her shoulders, sincerity in his voice. “Glad to see things are moving forward.”

Kakashi clears his throat, feeling Naruto step around him, and moving to pick up his backpack, which somehow lays abandoned on the ground a few feet off. 

He shrugs. “Yeah, well, I mean…”

Naruto chimes in, with laughter in his voice, shouldering his pack once more. “Well, I gave him due warning.”

Tenten coughs, loudly, to hide her snort.

Kakashi rolls his eyes, ignoring the amused glances. 

Sora speaks up, affection and teasing clear in her voice. “I’m pleasantly surprised.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, shooting her a look.

Sora tilts her head, just a bit, towards them.

 

Right.

 

Kakashi clears his throat, and turns to face Karin, Neji, Hinata, Hanabi and… Sasuke.

Who, now that Kakashi knows, is plastered so obviously to Hanabi that Kakashi wants to laugh out. Or weep with relief.

Or both.

 

He sniffs, with a nod. “Welcome home.” He clears his throat again, trying not to stare. “I am excited to hear about all that you’ve found.” He hesitates, shooting Kushina a look. “If you found anything.”

Kushina shrugs, clicking her tongue with a shake of her head. “History, mostly. “ She shares a look with Yui, who is behind her and Minato, and then with Sora. “Some tatters of what was.” She looks back at Kakashi, and he has the distinct impression she is deflecting. “But then this trip was about healing, too.” She smirks, her eyes twinkling. “And we found that.”

Kakashi hums, refusing to look at the group behind him, or Naruto. Later. I’ll talk to him about all that later. “Chujoro is now the Rokudaime Mizukage of Kirigakure. The Godaime Mizukage, Mei-sama, has decided to live with us.”

Minato tilts his head, his blue eyes burning. “Oh?”

Kakashi nods, with a sniff. “Yes. There are… personal layers to that decision, too.”

 

Naruto speaks up, glee in his voice. “Ah yessss, Sensei bushy-eyebrows is getting some!”

Kakashi blinks, and then turns and tries to curb his amusement into an admonishing look, which fails though, by a mile, when Naruto just grins back, broadly. “What? He deserves it?”

 

Sasuke speaks up, tone calm. “We all deserve love.”

 

Kakashi’s eyes lock with Naruto’s for a split second, before he turns again, to look at Sasuke, noting that everyone else does, too.

 

Sasuke quirks an eyebrow, and then nods at Kakashi, before he turns his head to look at Hanabi, who is grinning at him, small dimples on her cheeks.

Kakashi blinks, to shoot a look at Neji, who shrugs, and then at Hinata, who has her arm around Hanabi’s shoulders.

And who nods at Kakashi, once, and then smiles, beatifically. 

 

 

Kakashi hesitates for a split second, and then steps up to them, ignoring the weight of the other’s gazes. “Hanabi-san. I believe we haven’t been properly introduced. Or met, not since… that fateful day.”

Hanabi turns her head to look at him, lilac eyes sparkling. “Rokudaime-sama. Thank you for letting me go on all these trips.” Her hands fly out, indicating the whole world. “The things I’ve seen on them! If I may, I would love to continue them! I wish to see Amegakure, and I heard that the thunderstorms in Sunagakure are so severe that you cannot see the sky for weeks, can you imagine? Uzushiogakure must have been beautiful as well, and Sasuke has told me about the Samurai who hosted the kage conference back then.” She shakes her head, happily, a strand of black hair falling into her eyes, which she pushes behind her hair, only for it to slip back down immediately again. “And the sea! Oh, how I wished Konoha was built next to the sea!”

Kakashi chuckles, weighing his head a bit. “Well, we do have a harbor at least?”

Hanabi waves at him, with a roll of her eyes. “Ah, but that is not the same, and our harbor isn’t exactly the prettiest.” She blushes just a bit, but doesn’t duck her head, or deflate. “Well, I mean no insult, Hokage-sama.”

Kakashi chuckles, holding up a hand. “No, no, you are quite right, Hanabi-san.” He nods at her. “And it’s Kakashi, please.”

This time, Hanabi blushes, just a bit. And shares a look with Hinata for confirmation, which reminds Kakashi that she is still young after all, despite her breezy personality. Right. How old is she? Fourteen? Fifteen? What did Mei say? An age gap, but not as big as mine with Naruto? He shoots a look at Sasuke, who gazes back solemnly. I wonder how you feel about that.

Hanabi’s voice draws him back. “Thank you, Kakashi-san.” She clears her throat. “Naruto has told me that others, like Konohamaru, Udon and Muegi are out with their Sensei regularly. Since I was living in the outskirts, I was not assigned to the team rosters.” She hesitates. “I would like to request assignments nonetheless. I have mastered my clan’s jutsus, and I am more than able to.”

Kakashi tilts his head, seeing a shadow pass over Sasuke’s face. “I see.” He hesitates, and then nods, once. “Maybe we could combine your assignments with other trips. You could become something similar to an ambassador to other nations.”

Hanabi beams at him, with a clap of her hands. “Oh, that would be lovely.”

Sasuke opens his mouth behind her, and then closes it again, slowly. 

His eyes find Kakashi’s, for a long, long look.

 

Kakashi nods, slowly, and then steps back, feeling Sasuke’s purple eyes follow him. “Hanabi-san.”

 

He nods at Karin, who is watching rather intensely, wondering for a split-second about the history there. Noting the way Neji’s thumb slowly strokes the skin of her hand.

 

He clears his throat. “As I said. Welcome home, all of you. I expect reports of the trip in two days time. Do wash up, and get settled again first though.” He smirks, shooting a look at Naruto. “You must have pushed them quite hard for my pack to prefer to return home before entering Konoha?”

Naruto grins, pulling at the straps of his backpack. “Oh yeah. I ran with them, and Kurama, often.” He snickers. “Pakkun was complaining about wounded paws.” He leans in, whispering for effect. “But I think he just wanted to continue searching through rubble, instead of running.”

Kakashi chuckles, and then shrugs, with a wink. “Well, his function is tracking.”

Naruto hums, with an amused frown. “But that does involve running, does it not?”

Kakashi grins. “Right.” And Pakkun was obviously trying to find something. Or follow the scent of something. He shares a look with Kushina, who gives the tiniest shake of her head. 

 

He claps his hands. “Alright. Almost lunch time.” He smirks, repeating. “Welcome home.”

 

Naruto steps up to him, hand drawing over the armor on Kakashi’s chest, sending shivers through him, before starting down the road again. “See you later, Kakashi.”

Minato looks after him, amusedly, before turning with Kushina to follow him, and Kakashi watches the others start after them, too, one by one, Sasuke giving another nod, until it is only Sora, who is standing there still.

 

Kakashi hums. “The trip was successful?”

Sora nods, tone low. “On various levels, yes.” She inhales, deeply, and then looks up at Hashirama’s stone head. “But… that is kage-level information. Let’s talk about it later.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Not time-critical?”

 

Sora hums. “I sure hope not.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“Ahhh, I’m so glad to be back.”

 

Kakashi grunts, shifting beneath the sudden influx of weight, as Naruto drapes himself over and onto him rather unceremoniously, wriggling until he is comfortable.

He threads his fingers into still damp gold, and places his other hand onto Naruto’s sides, eyes unseeing on the ceiling. “Did you enjoy the Land of Whirlpools?”

Naruto hums. “Oh yes.” He twitches, nose pushing up under Kakashi’s jaw. “Though it is weird, while I did feel the weight of history there… the whole situation, the whole trip was just good, you know. Not solemn, not sad.” He shakes his head. “Even Yui-san and Karin loosened up after a while. We laughed, a lot.”

Kakashi grins to himself, softly stroking. “I’m glad.” He smirks, and then clicks his tongue. “Though I’m trying to imagine Karin and failing…”

Naruto snickers. “Yeah, well, we need to have dinner with them at some point. She and Neji are so cute together when they’ve loosened up.” He shifts, and then pushes up, elbow propped up on Kakashi’s chest, to look down at him. “Mom looked wistful at times. She and Dad watched all the sunrises and sunsets while we were there… I think they’re trying to make memories.” He leans in, whispering with a faint blush. “And they were sometimes gone, and… we didn’t look.”

Kakashi chuckles, watching Naruto’s eyes glow. “And Neji and Karin weren’t? Or Hinata and Tenten?” Sasuke and Hanabi?

Naruto shakes his head, the dimple visible for a moment, there and gone again. “Well, not as often as they.”

Kakashi snorts, and Naruto joins in, softly chuckling. 

 

Kakashi pulls his hand from Naruto’s waist, reaches up to trace his cheek. “How was seeing Sasuke and… her on this trip for you.”

Naruto blinks, looking away for a long moment. “You know?”

Kakashi hums. “Guy knew. Mei did, too.” He shrugs, just a bit. “Guy wasn’t able to contain his joy.”

A small, somewhat painful smile twitches over Naruto’s face. “Ah.” He nods, and then exhales, in a rush. “I… it was good. I am glad.” He frowns, and then looks at Kakashi, directly. “I am.” He pauses, and then shakes his head. “But it is weird. And…” He trails off. 

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “What did Hinata say?”

Naruto weighs his head. “I don’t know much, she and Sasuke only talked with each other a ways off. But I heard one thing, at one point, and that was her telling him that he knows what he has to do.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. Oh? He exhales. “I see.”

Naruto shoots him a look. “I think she was referring to you, and our bond.”

Kakashi weighs his head, just a bit. “Poor Sasuke.”

 

Naruto snorts. “I think he sees it as his punishment.”

Kakashi blinks, very slowly, tone… off. “I think I need to talk to him then. THAT is really not…”

Naruto shakes his head, waving him off. “No, not in a really negative way. Just… karma, you know?”

Kakashi hums. Yeah, well. I’ll still talk to him.

Naruto watches him, expression vaguely amused. “You’ll still talk to him.”

Kakashi shrugs. “I should, don’t you think?”

Naruto smiles, softly. “Yeah. Probably.” He leans in, presses a kiss onto Kakashi’s clothed lips. “Later though.”

Kakashi exhales, and then reaches, thoroughly enjoying the shiver that runs through Naruto.

He whispers. “I’m glad you’re back.”

Naruto grins, nestling back into his embrace with a hum. “So am I.”

 

There is a pause, as Kakashi simply strokes skin, and massages scalp, breathing in. 

 

Naruto speaks up eventually, voice decidedly sleepy already. “It was weird being there without you…”

Kakashi lifts his eyebrows, shakes his head just a bit. “I simply cannot take all the trips anymore. I’m sorry.”

Naruto yawns. “I know. Still, I had a lot of fun with Hanabi, too. She… has this energy.” He chuckles, softly. “I think she’ll drag Sasuke out and around the world.”

Kakashi smiles, softly, trying to imagine the dynamic. “A sight to see.”

Naruto snickers, and then gets even heavier, as his limbs relax further. “Oh yeah.”

 

There is another pause, and Naruto’s breaths deepen, and Kakashi thinks he has fallen asleep already, but he mumbles the words, eventually, there, against Kakashi’s throat. “They’re cute together.”

 

Kakashi hums, and then relaxes, too, closing his eyes, weighted down and floating by everything he wants right now. “I’m glad.”

 

 

 

I really am.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

They are waiting for him when he enters the office the next morning, the scent of coffee drifting through it.

 

Kakashi hesitates on the threshold, watching three red heads turn to him, from where their respective owners are seated on the sofa.

He grins, closing the door behind himself. “You look like a myth I once heard of, the Hecate. In red.”

Kushina quirks an eyebrow, tone amused. “You see us as a trifold goddess?”

Karin snorts, sipping on her coffee. “Now that designation is something different for once.”

Yui hums, weighing her head. “A somewhat apt designation for us though.” Her eyes crinkle. “The maiden, the mother, the crone.” She harrumphs, exaggeratedly, crossing her arms. “I’m trying not to be offended.”

 

Kakashi tries to hide his smile, knowing they can all probably see it despite the mask. “I apologize.” He steps over to his desk, leaning back against it. “Still.” He nods to himself. “But you do look like you’re going to invoke some serious council in a moment.”

Kushina’s eyes sparkle. “In the myth’s world our jutsus would be what they call witchcraft. Magic.”

Karin weighs her head. “And we are here to talk about… tools.”

Yui nods. “Yes. I remembered something when we entered the destroyed village.” A shadow passes over her face, there and gone again. “I asked your ninken to find it.”

Kakashi hums, surmising correctly.. “And they did.”

Yui nods, silently. 

 

Kushina places a hand onto her arm for a moment, and then reaches for a small bundle, that lies on the table in front of her. “Here.” She unwraps the bundle, slowly, and Kakashi steps close, frowning at the item when it is revealed.

He blinks, looking up at Kushina. “A… hiraishin kunai?”

Kushina clicks her tongue, shaking her head once. “No, not a hiraishin kunai. The hiraishin kunai.”

Kakashi frowns, echoing. “The hiraishin kunai.”

Yui fidgets, and then nods. “Yes. I remembered where it was.” She swallows. “I was so young then. It’s been so long.” She looks up at Kakashi, slowly. “I had forgotten.”

Kakashi exhales, slowly, lowering himself into a crouch in front of the table. “Explain, please.”

Karin speaks up, hesitantly. “You know my kekkei genkai.”

Kakashi nods, mutely. 

Karin fidgets, but then continues. “I… my mother once told me it was a gift.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly. “And?”

Karin grimaces, and Kushina interjects, calmly. “A gift is something you receive, Kakashi.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, thoughts racing. “You mean the ability was artificially implanted in Karin’s mother. Or ancestry.”

Kushina nods. 

 

Kakashi looks down onto the knife with the weird and intricate markings, trying to understand. “And this knife…”

Yui exhales, in a rush. “This knife was kept in a temple. The markings on it are special, and I doubt any of us could actually reproduce them or the invisible seals. But I know what they mean.” A flash of pain, in her eyes, there and gone again. “I remember my mother explaining the ceremony of its use to me once. Whispering, while we watched, in the temple.” She swallows. “The knife, this knife was used to alter the chakra pathways of a person.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “Alter them. How.”

Kushina shrugs, tone low. “In any way you want.” She hesitates. “Think of it as a hook, that you can drag through a body’s pathways. Or a key, if you will.” She shakes her head, staring unseeing past Kakashi for a moment. “For example, we could take it, and lock your friend Guy’s inner gates.”

Kakashi’s voice is caustic. “Lock them.”

Kushina nods, and then her eyes find his again, utter sincerity in them. Gravity. “Yes. Or we could take your lightning nature from you. Give you something else. Or… not.”

 

Kakashi blinks, very slowly. Understanding, with a rush of ice through his veins. “This weapon can render anyone with any kind of chakra… powerless.”

Kushina works her jaw for a moment, before she clicks her tongue. “Yes.”

Karin shivers. “It’s the ultimate weapon. It can defeat anyone.”  That is why Madara wanted the Uzumaki gone so badly? That is why he used Kirigakure to destroy them?

Yui presses her lips together for a moment. “It’s a tool though. And one that cannot be reproduced.” She harrumphs. “I actually hadn’t really believed we could find it still.” She swallows. 

Kakashi lowers his gaze once more, looking at the innocuously looking knife. 

He closes his eyes for a long moment. “I need to know - can we use it?”

Kushina quirks an eyebrow. “Anyone skilled enough in fuinjutsu can.”

 

Kakashi looks up to her, very slowly. “So… You, me… and Minato.”

Kushina’s eyes are dark, oh so dark. “Yes.” She lowers her head, just a bit. 

Stares at him.

 

Kakashi stares back at her, holding the gaze. And you have a plan. You want to do something with it. What?

He swallows, and then averts his gaze, pushing back up. “I see.”

He looks away and back at her, sees her give the tiniest shake of her head. 

He exhales. “That is good work.” He snorts. “I’m not sure how I will be able to share it with Kirigakure though…”

 

Yui’s voice is heated. “You won’t.”

Karin ducks her head, taking a sip of her coffee.

Kushina places her hand, on Yui’s forearm. “We won’t.” She looks up at Kakashi. “I will clear that with Mei.”

Kakashi lifts his eyebrows. “She is not the active Mizukage anymore though.”

Kushina clicks her tongue, settling back and crossing her legs. “I’ll find a way.”

 

Kakashi exhales, in a rush, and then shrugs his shoulders, tone deliberately light. “Who am I to argue with a goddess.”

 

Kushina’s voice carries something that makes him shiver. “Right?”

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“Naruto and I trained a bit, on the trip.”

 

“Oh?” Kakashi looks up from the report he’s reading and at Minato, who is seated across - also reading reports. He quirks an eyebrow. “Anything… special?”

Minato weighs his head, for a moment, the hair shifting. Kakashi mourns the longer hair for a moment, but has to admit that the cut Minato has now, and which resembles the one he had when he used to be Kakashi’s team leader, suits him better. 

Minato exhales, with a shrug. “You didn’t tell me his cells had adaptive powers.”

Kakashi frowns. “I… Yes, they do. We kinda played around with that ability a bit a while earlier, in training, but we haven’t really dug into it.” He shrugs, too. “Too much other stuff, too many other skills to learn.” He clicks his tongue. “Then again, he can literally transform into the nine-tails, so…” He sighs. “It just… I’m not sure why it’s a surprise, you know? I mean, I don’t know why I was surprised.”

Minato snorts, drily. “Right.” He shoots Kakashi a look. “Has he… you know, transformed? I mean in private?”

Kakashi blinks, and then colors, spectacularly, while shaking his head, wildly. “Err. No. I mean…” Not that I am aware of. He draws a hand over his face, trying to will the flow of blood away. “While he is aware of some… I don’t know, tendencies - if you want to call it that - he once said that that didn’t feel right.”

Minato hums. “But he has thought about it.”

Kakashi grunts. “I think Naruto has thought about a lot more of things… more than I used to give him credit for.”

Minato clicks his tongue, tone vaguely amused. “True. I have the distinct impression that he plays dumb sometimes simply to get away with things.” Minato hesitates. “Still. His… tendencies are something to be explored…”, he holds up his hand, forestalling Kakashi’s answer, “as they carry a lot of strength in them, possibilities. If he is able to access them. I mean, we have ninjas literally carrying snake traits. It’s so stupid that people equate certain other tendencies with weakness.”

Kakashi snorts, darkly. “I often thought of that when I sometimes watched Sakura destroy a training ground under Tsunade’s tutelage.” He shakes his head. “But apart from that, I bet our other kunoichis would like to have a word to anyone stating that out loud, too.”

Minato hums, leaning back a bit. “You’ve been drawing in the best of them. Inviting them.”

 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, looking away for a moment. “You noticed.”

Minato’s gaze softens, when he smiles, just slightly. “Of course.”

Kakashi nods, and then exhales, leaning back also, and giving the scroll the tiniest push on his desk. He looks out of the window for a long moment. “If we want to build a worthy future we have to draw on the strengths of everyone. Be aware of the strengths and capabilities of everyone.” He swallows. “The war back then took a lot of the role models. The Sandaime didn’t… really actively encourage.”

He shakes his head once, and then looks back at Minato, with a wry grin. “Besides, our final enemy was Kaguya - if that doesn’t speak for itself I don’t know what does.”

Minato grunts, raising his eyebrows. “Think Madara was peeved about that?”

Kakashi snorts, weighing his head. “If I understand that correctly, both he and Hashirama had a healthy respect for Mito.” He pulls a face, clicking his tongue. “So I don’t think he had a problem with that.”

Minato chuckles, staring unseeing into space for a long moment. “Mito taught Kushina a lot.”

Kakashi hums. “I bet.”

 

He hesitates, and then shoots Minato a look, with a quirked eyebrow. “What does all of this have to do with Naruto privately transforming though?”

Minato grins, a bit peevishly, leaning back. He shrugs. “Ahhhh, nothing can get past you.”

Kakashi grunts, drily. “Learned from the best.”

Minato smirks, and then looks away. “I… he can adapt and change cell matter. Create it. We know that.” He looks back at Kakashi, locking their gazes. “We know he has certain… plans.”

Kakashi swallows, resisting the urge to fidget under the gaze. “Yes?”

Minato breaks the gaze, lowering his. He steeples his fingers. Fidgets.

Kakashi stares, waiting. 

Minato sighs, eventually, deeply. “There is something, a mode, that Naruto could achieve.”

 

Kakashi blinks, and then frowns. “A mode.” And… only Naruto could achieve it?

Minato nods, and then looks back up, with a sigh. “As you know, some of the most powerful jutsus are lifeforce based.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, and then nods, mutely.

Minato leans forward, on his elbows. “When we trained, he transformed his eyeteeth, and fingernails, more or less on a whim. Based on his emotions, I bet.” He lifts his eyebrows. “I know that… you know, that Yamato-san can create living matter.” 

Kakashi blinks again, with a tilt of his head, trying to follow. “Yes?”

Minato hesitates, tone imploring now. “There is a theoretical mode of nine-tails fusion, that Mito told Kushina about. It was out of reach for many a jinchuriki, maybe with the exception of that Killer-B, who seems to be best buddy to his bijou.”

Kakashi nods, tone flat. “Yes. They still are, his bijou is staying with him.” A fusion?

Minato nods. “So is Kurama. This mode supposedly requires the bijou to consent to life-force being burnt for a massive increase of power.”

Kakashi frowns, eyes moving back and forth on Minato’s. He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “A last resort. An all in or nothing mode.”

Minato grimaces, but nods again. “Yes.” He holds up one of his fingers, straightening up a bit. “But!” He hesitates, lowering his voice. “Kushina and I have been discussing this, a lot. So. But what if… what if we could trigger Hashirama’s cells within him to grow.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “Grow.”

Minato lifts his eyebrows. “Provide life-force.”

 

Kakashi’s heart skips a beat, with the sudden rush of adrenaline, and the awareness that they have arrived at something crucial, something… important. 

He tries to hide his shiver. “You want to enable him to use that mode, indefinitely.”

Minato’s voice is a whisper. “Yes. Kushina says his chains are different. I want to try to find a way to enable Naruto to transform parts of himself, on purpose.”

Kakashi shakes his head, trying to understand. “You want to make parts of him… into a tree?”

Minato grimaces. “I know how it sounds.” He leans in again. “But think about it. Hashirama was supposedly extremely hard to kill, his regeneration was legendary.”

Kakashi grunts, feeling dangerously unsettled. “Naruto’s regeneration is legendary already, too.”

Minato nods, acquiescing. “Yes.” He clicks his tongue. “But it is Kurama’s regeneration that does that. The fusion of their cells.”

Kakashi blinks, very slowly. “You want him to change on a cellular level.”

Minato hums. “I want him to change parts of his cells, yes. Activate that part of Hashirama’s power, if you will.”

Kakashi frowns. “Why do you think he can do that?”

 

Minato’s eyes glitter. “There were wooden splinters in the hurricane of his rasen shuriken when we trained.”

Kakashi pushes up, suddenly unable to stay put, turning to look out the window, unseeing.

Minato’s voice is soft. “You don’t know how to feel about that.”

Kakashi’s voice carries something brittle. “You want him to change.”

Minato’s tone is gentle, carrying understanding. “Change is part of life.”

Kakashi frowns, and then turns, to stare at his Sensei. His tone is dark. “What if he doesn’t fully manage, and then enters that mode and… dies.”

Minato blinks, very slowly. “That is a possibility.”

Kakashi stares at him, with a snarl. 

Minato holds up a hand, tone deliberately light. “But, you know, it’s Naruto.”

Kakashi scoffs. 

 

Minato exhales, watching him silently.

Kakashi works his jaw, looking away, for a long moment. 

When he speaks again, his voice is scratchy. “So. How does all of this…” He gesticulates, knowing Minato understands. “… match with your question in regards to his transformational… whims?” He crosses his arms.

Minato sighs, and then nods, clicking his tongue. “We… don’t know what the cell adaption would do. But we know that it would be easier if…”

Kakashi pushes his jaw forward, tone clipped. “If?”

Minato blinks, very slowly. “If he would attempt it while being in a neutral state. At least while changing the cells.”

Kakashi frowns deeply. “A neut…” He closes his eyes for a long moment. “Why.”

 

Minato sighs, deeply. “Traits by gender happen through hormones, genetics, and inclination. That’s very simplified, but ultimately it burns down to this. It’s individual, but we usually only access one side of the information. Of our… theoretical potential.” 

Kakashi stares at him, waiting. 

Minato spreads his hands. “We want him to be able to access all traits, all genetic and hormonal information if you so will, when he changes his cells. Incorporate that change into his full and absolute potential.” 

Kakashi’s voice is icy. “I know for a fact that he does not wish to become even more… weird.”

Minato raises his eyebrows, with a nod.

He leans back. “And I know for a fact that when they come and… you will have children by then, Kakashi…” Minato leans in again, blue gaze hard. “Naruto will want to have access to that power. That mode. Freed of the restraints of society and gender, and beyond death in a very real way.” Minato’s voice drops. “Trust me - you do anything for your child.”

Kakashi swallows, harshly, looking away.

 

He finally asks, not recognizing his own voice. “Why are you telling me this now?”

Minato shrugs. “We needed the knife.”

Kakashi watches him, working his jaw. “You’ve been thinking about this for a while.”

Minato grimaces, just a bit. “We have met Yui-san a year ago, at one of the parties. We started to talk, reminiscing if you will. She made an off-hand comment. Kushina latched onto it, with what she knew from Mito.”

Kakashi nods, feeling surprisingly bitter. “And you went and tried to find the tool that would enable you to… what.”

Minato tilts his head, just a bit, tone soft. “The knife can be used to change Kurama’s and Naruto’s pathways. Merge them, if you will. They are already entwined on a cellular level, on a genetic level. But the chakra merge would enable them to just… switch that mode on.” Minato clicks his tongue. “If and when the regeneration is working properly, of course.”

Kakashi scoffs. “Of course.”

 

He turns away, unable to look at Minato right now, his guts churning. “How can you be so calm.”

Minato exhales, and then gets up as well, stepping up to Kakashi. Places a palm in-between Kakashi’s shoulder blades. “I… was always able to partition my emotions away. You know that. That doesn’t mean that they’re not there, Kaka-kun.”

Kakashi sniffs, drawing a hand down his face. “It has to be his choice.”

Minato hums. “Of course.”

 

‘And we both know what he will decide’ hangs in the air, unsaid.

 

Kakashi steps away from the hand grounding him, and around Minato, to take his damn place again. He picks up the report once more.

His voice is caustic. “I hate it.”

 

Minato’s voice is soft, and full of feeling. “I know.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“You weren’t happy when I suggested that Hanabi could take on these missions.”

 

Sasuke grimaces, surprisingly strongly and openly, with a sigh. “No.”

Kakashi blinks, watching him from he corner of his eyes. “You’re not asking how I know?”

Sasuke snorts, just a bit. “You went to Kirigakure. I bet the knowledge is all over that village.”

Kakashi nods. “Yes. And Sensei Guy knew, of course.”

Sasuke smirks, just a bit, for a moment. “Of course.”

Kakashi quirks his eyebrows. “You don’t mind?”

Sasuke hums, easily weaving his way through the people on the street. “Not really. It has happened. I got the time I needed to adapt to this knowledge. And it’s…”

Kakashi waits a moment, hands in his pockets, a shadow next to Sasuke. “Yes?”

Sasuke exhales, with a slow blink, and a look, thrown Kakashi’s way. “Freeing.” He swallows, and then shrugs. “You know it was hard, before. And while it is not exactly easy now…” He trails off.

Kakashi nods. “The pressure is gone. The frantic anticipation.”

Sasuke closes his eyes for just a moment. “Yes.”

 

Kakashi hums, and then lifts his gaze to the sky, watching a hawk circle. “The Godaime used to remove me from direct proximity due to the age gap. Prolonged proximity will hasten the need.”

Sasuke grimaces, fidgeting. “That is why you suggested?”

Kakashi shrugs. “In part. She is way too young still.” He shoots Sasuke a look. “I know, I know, the Sandaime and his wife… but I don’t think he is the best role model, right?”

Sasuke snorts, a bit caustically. “No.” He hesitates. “Hinata said so, too.”

Kakashi nods, mutely. And then shrugs. “And apart from that I think Hanabi will give you a run for your money. Good luck.”

Sasuke snorts, truly this time. His eyes sparkle. “Right?”

Kakashi grins. “You appreciate that.”

Sasuke sighs, almost happily. “Oh yes.”

Kakashi hums, and then lowers his voice. “You’ve come so far. I’m so proud of you.”

Sasuke’s voice is just the tiniest bit wobbly. “I… thank you. Ka… Sensei.”

Kakashi nods.

 

Eventually Sasuke sniffs, turning into the road to the park. “Kakashi, I want you to send me on missions. As before. Until…”

Kakashi interjects, calmly. “Of course. I’ll help you.”

Sasuke turns his head, to look at him, the purple eyes intense. “I appreciate it.”

Kakashi nods. 

 

And then clicks his tongue, tone deliberately light. “Someone pointed out to me that, if Naruto continues with his plans in regards to children et cetera…” He shoots Sasuke a look, watches the wheels turn. Grins, when it clicks. “I hope you’re prepared for those kind of family dinners.”

Sasuke’s groan is heartfelt. “Oh man.”

 

Kakashi chuckles, just a bit meanly. “Oh yes.”

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

Hanabi’s character development in Boruto is one of the few things I like there. She’s irreverent, strong, and a party girl. Honestly, that is what Sasuke needs, imho. Desperately. Someone to drag his… errr… emo ass out to let go. I also liked the implications and ties, obviously :P Hope it makes sense to you, too!!!

Chapter 56: White veil falling

Notes:

Chapter warning: first time, whoop whoop (finally!!!) 😅😇😈
Since this is the… err…. Supposedly main pairing that we’ve all been waiting for I didn’t put markers around it. Most of this chapter is rather explicit :)

Btw - I was going back and forth with them having it as a threesome with Sasuke … but the way the fic clicked into place in the last chapters… it doesn’t really make sense here. So maybe they all go on a trip together later *laughs* But of course it can be teased… ;)))

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

“Mei and I struck a deal.”

 

Kakashi watches Kushina take a sip of her coffee, and then turns his head again, to watch the children playing in the distance. “Oh?”

Kushina hums. “Yes.” She tilts her head, lowers her voice. “Did you know she couldn’t have children? Her cycle is off.”

Kakashi grimaces, and then shakes his head. “No. I’m… sorry to hear that.”

Kushina hums, lifting her eyebrows, while taking another sip. 

Kakashi frowns, trying to understand. “You… want to help with that in payment for her to convince Chujoro?”

Kushina shrugs. “I’ve already cleared it with Kaguya, and Naruto. She told him what to do.”

Kakashi blinks. Slowly. “He… knows how to apply that kind of theoretical knowledge?”

Kushina shrugs. “With Sakura’s help, yes.” She grins suddenly. “More children incoming, Kakashi. Better build a few more playgrounds.”

Kakashi shakes his head, very slowly. “You know, if you had told me twenty years ago…”

 

Kushina chuckles, eyes sparkling, sighing around another sip. “Right?”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Don’t you want to tell him?”

 

“Hmm?” Kakashi looks up from the report he’s signing, and up at Shizune, who hands him the next, with a shrug. “That they’re going to be back in a while… that he is going to be back.”

Kakashi clears his throat. “Well, I mean… we cannot know how they come back. I…” He draws a hand over his face. “It will be a shock, either way. But I don’t want to bring hopes up that may not be warranted, you know?”

Shizune quirks an eyebrow. And then grins. “Think he may be pissed at you for not telling?”

Kakashi snorts, and then grins, too. “Probably. But I can handle that.”

Shizune giggles, and then hands him another scroll. “Have fun then.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes a bit, knowing full well that she knows they’re not there yet. “Well, thanks.”

Shizune watches him for a moment, and then clicks her tongue, tone sly. “You’re not defending yourself anymore.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Defending?”

Shizune hums, reaching out to collect the signed scrolls. “Yes. That… you’re not there yet.”

Kakashi blushes, willing himself to ignore it. “Oh. That.” He clears his throat. “Well, I’ve been told we operate on a timeframe…”

Shizune laughs out, loudly. And then snickers. “That you do.”

Kakashi grins, and then shrugs, with a little laugh. 

 

And reaches for the next scroll.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi watches as Sasuke stands next to Itachi, whose black eyes seem to glitter, transfixed entirely on her. 

 

He blinks, shifting his gaze to Sakura, who reaches now for Itachi’s hand, threads their fingers together. She looks radiant in her white veil.

He watches, as Hanabi reaches for Sasuke’s hand.

Watches, as Sakura’s father sniffs, drawing her mother into an embrace.

 

Watches, as the crowd shifts, to witness.

 

Naruto’s hand finds his, too.

 

And Kakashi knows what it means.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Minato settles down next to him, the music of the party a backdrop, holding out a glass of champagne for him. “Why are you out here alone, Kaka-kun?”

Kakashi smirks, turning the glass a bit, watching the light’s reflections on it. 

He shrugs, just a bit. “Just thinking…  about what might be and what is already.” He ducks his head, just a bit. “About…” He trails off, blushing just a bit.

Minato grins, gently. “I think he has plans for tonight. And tomorrow. He’s told Shikamaru you‘ll be unavailable.”

Kakashi snorts, and then rubs his free hand over his face. “I know.”

Minato’s grin gentles into a smirk, his blue eyes watchful and understanding. “Scared?”

Kakashi clears his throat, resisting the urge to tap his foot. “It’s stupid.”

Minato grunts, and then cackles. “No, it’s not?” He winks when Kakashi looks at him, shrugging. “This is a highly anticipated event. It was for us, and it’s definitely been on another level for you.” Kakashi pulls a face but stays silent, and Minato continues after a moment, watching him. “But that’s not all of it, is it?”

Kakashi exhales, in a rush, and then shakes his head, once. “No.”

Minato hums. “So, what is it?”

 

Kakashi frowns, pointing vaguely with his glass. “Remember when Sakura’s veil fell? Earlier?”

Minato frowns. “Yes?”

Kakashi shakes his head, once. “I… It reminded me of how Kaguya’s hair floated when she had just… err reincarnated from Madara’s body.”

Minato blinks, tone serious now. “And?”

Kakashi fidgets. “I… we know they can travel through dimensions, which doesn’t give us much in regards to timeframe. Where they’re from or currently at I mean.” He shifts. “But she said her arrival would be like a signal in their consciousness and that they would come then, immediately….  Instantaneously. And whatever form that signal is, it still has to play by the rules of physics. I mean, we can build machines around our skills, as Nagato has proven. Or the Yamanaka clan’s enhancers, during the war. It’s energy we use… She is using energy as well.”

Minato narrows his eyes, just a bit. “What are you getting at, Kaka-kun.”

Kakashi grimaces. “It’s just… a signal has to travel through space to reach something. It needs time to get somewhere.”

Minato stares at him, and then blinks, very slowly, words coming haltingly. “And so, since we can measure her energy outputs… when they come, we know the distance from which they came.”

Kakashi nods, once.

Minato frowns. “But we don’t know the direction.”

Kakashi nods again, and then takes a sip of his champagne. “Yes. But would we need to?”

Minato’s eyes are remote for a split second. “You wish to adapt our barrier system to expand beyond the limits of our world.”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Or adapt it to… transmit our own signal, to a certain… event horizon.”

Minato’s eyes glitter. “Warning them. Attacking them?”

Kakashi quirks his eyebrows, and then clicks his tongue. “Depends, I guess.”

Minato hums. “Risky. We would base our knowledge solely on their arrival. What if they do not come to her immediately after all?”

Kakashi shrugs. “I don’t know… but right now…”

Minato exhales, and then nods. “It’s the only thing we have.”

Kakashi nods.

 

 

There is a shiver of movement, and Kakashi looks up, and at Sasuke, who settles on his other side, with a sigh. “Kakashi.”

Kakashi smirks softly, and then toasts him, lightly. “Sasuke.” He clicks his tongue. “How does the night feel for you?”

Sasuke ducks his head, just a bit. “I’m happy for them.” He hesitates, and then snorts. “It’s just a bit weird though, still, seeing them. I feel like I look through some kind of magic mirror sometimes. I mean, in another world…”

Kakashi hums, understanding very well. “I get it.” He takes another sip of champagne, sharing a quick look with Minato, before addressing Sasuke again. “So. How did you like the orange, pink and white balloons everywhere.”

Sasuke snorts, and then sends an amused look at Kakashi. “I guess we can be happy those were only at the party. It’s… a bit much.” He leans in, just a bit. “I was sorely tempted to pop a few of them.”

Kakashi chuckles.

Minato speaks up, tone dry. “Kushina did.”

Kakashi snorts, coughing around the sip he just took.

Sasuke leans forward a bit, to look at Minato, with a chuckle. “She did?”

Minato hums, waggling his eyebrows. “Oh yes, right after Naruto had stopped complaining about inflating them all, earlier. Right in front of him. Grinning like a fiend. An orange one, too. You should have seen his face.” He shrugs, with a put on sigh. “Guess who he has his mischievous side from.”

Kakashi grunts. “Like you’re a saint?”

Minato grins at him, widely. And then places a palm to his chest, tone mock-hurt. “Moi?”

Sasuke snorts.

 

Kakashi grins, and then hums, shooting Sasuke a look. “But you didn’t come here to talk about balloons or mischief, did you?”

He clicks his tongue, his purple eyes finding Kakashi’s once more. “I…” He frowns, sobering a bit. “Once upon a time Naruto needed me. He needed someone to grow with. I needed someone to heal with.” He hesitates, and Kakashi swallows, watching him silently. 

Sasuke smiles, softly. “But we are both grown now. Healed, for the most part. Our paths have converged, and now they are diverging again. Just a bit, thankfully, but…” He shakes his head, and then smiles, beatifically. “But enough.”

Kakashi swallows.

Sasuke tilts his head back, just a bit, to the shadows of the hall behind them, where they all know Naruto is standing.

He smirks. “The future is wide open. And we will seize it.”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, his throat closed off. 

Sasuke hesitates, and then leans in, to hug Kakashi, for a split second. 

Whispering. “Thank you.”

Kakashi holds him, and nods, the world blurry when Sasuke draws back again.

 

Sasuke smirks, and then shoots a look to the shadows, before pushing up, with a grunt. 

He clicks his tongue. “And now - excuse me. The Hyuugas have told me that I apparently need to learn some dance steps, because Hanabi loves to dance. And Neji insists he needs to be the one to show me.”

Kakashi blinks, and then cackles, with a shake of his head, while reaching up to wipe his eyes. “Neji?”

Sasuke’s tone is dry. “Right? I never would have guessed either.” He nods. “Rokudaime.”

Kakashi sniffs, and then nods, too, and watches him go, watches him reach up to cup Naruto’s cheek for a long moment in passing. 

The world blurs again, for the instance of a breath.

 

Minato pushes up as well, with a squeeze to his shoulder, and a waggle of his eyebrows. 

And a whisper. “Enjoy tonight, Kaka-kun.”

 

He steps over to Naruto, and pulls him into an embrace, silently. And then leaves, reentering the party through the glass doors, the music a slow backbeat.

 

 

 

There is a pause, fraught with implications.

 

 

 

 

Naruto steps up to Kakashi, slowly, and then extends his hand. His voice is surprisingly brittle. “Dance with me?”

Kakashi looks at him, and then puts his glass away, feeling dangerously unsettled. 

He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “Sure.”

Naruto smiles, just a bit wobbly, pulling him up. His touch burns.

 

Kakashi draws him in, slowly, inhaling freely as he does so. The scent of sunkissed skin, carried on salt and heat and possibility. 

He feels Naruto tremble, just a bit.

 

The air seems to crackle.

 

 

Naruto exhales, with a shiver, while shifting into the embrace.

He chuckles, under his breath, his eyes finding Kakashi’s, dark in the low light. “I thought it would be…” He trails off.

Kakashi swallows. “Easier?”

Naruto lifts his eyebrows, fingers gliding over Kakashi’s upper arms and shoulders. “Yeah.” His throat clicks as he swallows. “We danced before.”

Kakashi hums, letting his hand glide to the small of Naruto’s back, while his other reaches up to feather along Naruto’s jaw. “Not this dance though.”

Naruto’s teeth flash, as he grins, for a moment. “No.”

He swallows again, and then nestles in, pushes his hand up under Kakashi’s shirt in the back.

 

Kakashi’s voice is raw, the skin where Naruto’s hand touches ice-cold and scorching. “Naruto?”

Naruto just shakes his head, nestling in even more. His voice is so low that Kakashi cannot quite hear him. “I… just be with me. Right now.”

Kakashi blinks, with a painful smirk. And a shrug. “I don’t know how to be anything else.”

Not anymore. 

 

A shudder runs through the tall frame in his arms.

 

Breath, puffing against Kakashi’s skin through the mask.

 

Kakashi shivers. And then pushes his hand under the seam of Naruto’s jacket as well. His fingers push through the fishnet shirt they always wear, even now. Onto skin. 

There is a moment of something, and then Naruto shifts, to make the hand shift under completely. 

Kakashi inhales, shudderingly. 

 

Time seems to slow as they sway.

 

There is only them, and heartbeat, shared. 

Beat, thrumming, all around.

 

 

 

Kakashi pushes his nose in gold, and simply… breathes in.

 

The smell of summer, and sun, and home.

 

 

He wants to weep.

 

 

 

Naruto’s left hand comes up, pushes his fingers into Kakashi’s hair.

His nails scrap along Kakashi’s scalp, too sharp, too pointy. 

 

Deliberately.

 

Kakashi feels hot and cold all over, the tattoo tingling, in time with his stomach, a weird out-of-body feeling permeating his senses.

Naruto sniffs, and then presses a kiss to his temple, and pulls, just gently, and Kakashi gives, easily, inclines his head as requested, rests it on Naruto’s shoulder, the moment it touches the cloth with the firm muscles underneath burning itself into his mind.

 

 

It’s a simple, all-encompassing feeling.

 

 

It’s… home.

 

 

Just a simple thought, too. Carried on a torrent of feelings. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’m home.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Beyond knowledge, and beyond need, and beyond love, finally real.

 

 

 

 

Naruto breathes onto his skin now, fingers not moving, a shuddering breath, full of awareness somehow. 

 

And then he moves again, just a bit, and Kakashi realizes that they must have stopped moving, right, because they are again, now, and the music seems surreal, the lights just shadows, glinting from where they do not want to be just now.

 

Naruto hums, against his skin, the words almost inaudible. “Sasuke told me when we split up that he would leave at some point, remember. And that it was… up to me to follow him. My choice. Back then, I mean.”

Kakashi shivers, remembering vividly, indeed.

Naruto laughs, softly. “And I didn’t. Not that time. And he told me I wouldn’t.”

Kakashi presses even closer, the word more breath than shape. “Why?”

Naruto cringes in his arms, body taut as a spring for a moment, before he speaks again, voice shaking. “Because… even though it isn’t fair, and even though I have fought it so hard… I love you more.” He raises his head just a bit, presses his cheek to Kakashi’s. “I need you more.” He snorts. “I always needed you more. Even when I chased after him.”

Naruto’s fingers tighten in Kakashi’s hair, a soft kneading pull that makes Kakashi light-headed now. The words are carried on a gust of wind. “And I… I want you more. And now that he’s found her… I… can finally say it out loud.”

 

And Naruto pushes even closer, pushes his leg between Kakashi’s, aligning them.

 

Kakashi exhales shudderingly, and then presses him in, with the hand on the small of his back, the skin heated through the fishnet shirt. 

Naruto shudders.

 

 

And Kakashi says the only thing he can, the only thing that’s left. “I love you.”

Naruto sighs, relaxing in his arms.

 

 

And Kakashi takes up the swaying motion again, feels the way their bodies fit, the way the touch entices and builds, but not breaks, and the wind ruffles their hair, and it’s cold, but the searing heat of summer is in his arms and everything else… simply doesn’t matter.

 

 

Because he’s home.

 

And… Naruto is, too. 

 

 

 

 

 

And, just like that… it gets easy. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The morning sun lights up Naruto’s whiskers, the golden glow matching the one in Kakashi’s heart. He reaches up, carefully stroking the cheek with a bent knuckle, watching Naruto breathe. 

 

The grass around them is wet, and so is the thin blanket Kakashi put over them, pulled from one of the pockets of his gala uniform at some point, put in there by habit.

The earth is cold beneath them, here on training ground 10, where they moved at some point, when the music stopped and their dance ended, here where they came to, far out, to look at the stars.

 

Silently. 

 

Sleep had come, while breathing in the scents of skin.

While holding onto each other. 

 

They had done that before.

And yet it had been different, now.

 

And Kakashi marvels now, marvels at the fact that they haven’t kissed last night even though they did that before, haven’t had sex, haven’t… 

 

And yet.

 

This is more, already.

 

 

Somehow. 

 

 

 

He blinks, wondering if it is this bliss that everyone talks about, or if it is relief. 

 

Or the fact that it is so hard won. 

 

Naruto mumbles against his throat. "Stop thinking so hard.“

Kakashi snorts softly and turns a bit, shifting so they face each other, on their sides. 

He reaches up, draws his knuckles over Naruto’s face again, along the whiskers, following them with his eyes. Insanely happy that Naruto had told Shikamaru he had to cover for him, today. Knowing, somehow, on some level. Planning, probably. 

Naruto grins, softly, watching him. "You like them.“

Kakashi hums, answering the smile. "I‘ve always liked them.“

Naruto blinks, eyes flitting back and forth on Kakashi’s. "Really?“ He frowns. "Even then?“

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, while reaching up to feather the tip of his fingers along Naruto’s eye. "Then?“

Naruto shrugs, but grins softly when Kakashi boops his nose. "You know. When we met.“

Kakashi smirks, a bit wistfully. "You mean when I came to that little boy standing there, playing with pebbles…“ He blinks, the tears dropping, and he smiles through them. "That little boy that carried his heart like a shield and accepted me as a friend, immediately, showing me his pebbles?“

Naruto swallows, tone a bit wobbly. "I still have some pebbles… I don’t remember that meeting, not really, but…“

Kakashi smirks, gently. "I have one, too. It dropped from your fist.“

Naruto chuckles. "Really?“

Kakashi nods. "Mhhh hmmm. It’s always in my pocket.“

Naruto stares at him. "You’re kidding.“

Kakashi grins. "Nope.“

Naruto blinks. "Even now?“

Kakashi chuckles. "Yes?“

Naruto pushing his hand deep, feeling for it. 

 

And then reaches over, copping a feel.

 

Kakashi grunts, swallowing a moan.

Naruto grins, the words in stark contrast. “There is one more reason as to why.”

Kakashi swallows, trying to ignore the hand stroking now. “Oh yeah.”

Naruto nods, slowly, his eyes blue fire in the early morning sun. “Yes. I want… my parents and baa-chan still here when we have children. But you already know that.”

Kakashi stares at him, eyes fluttering shut when Naruto presses into his perineum, expertly. 

Naruto grins, and then ducks his head, his eyes searching Kakashi’s reopening ones. Obviously needing the confirmation. “Don’t you want to?”

Kakashi blinks, feeling a tear track down his face. Feeling for the truth. “More than anything.”

Naruto smiles, his whole face lighting up, and Kakashi smiles at him, too, reaching up to feather the tips of his fingers over Naruto’s lashes. “Light-haired children, with two whiskers.” Carrying the  past and the future.

Naruto bites his lips. “And blue or dark eyes.” He weighs his head, voice breathless. “Genetically, my Mom’s genes could prevail, too… maybe we would get a red-head with your eyes.” 

Kakashi grins. “I’d love that.”

Naruto smirks, wobbly. He swallows, and then reaches up to trace his fingers along Kakashi’s jaw. “It’s been almost two years, since… since the bond engaged.” His eyebrows go up, eyes grave suddenly. “I know I’m still young.” He shakes his head, once. “But I also know I would regret it, a lot, if I waited until the family I thought I’d lost is gone once more.” He smiles, beatifically, for a moment. “I know, we‘ve discussed that.”

Kakashi smirks, softly. “Yes. And… It’s for you…”, he hesitates, and then continues, “for us to experience it with them.”

Naruto nods, silently. 

 

Kakashi reaches up, stroking along the fine brow. “So, what now?”

Naruto inhales, deeply. “Now… I’ll switch paths.”

Kakashi frowns, vaguely remembering a comment, a while ago. “Meaning?”

Naruto licks along his lips, watches as Kakashi cannot help himself and watch, hungrily. “I want to go to your house.”

 

Ah.

 

Kakashi blinks, softly prompting. Knowing. Teasing. Needing to confirm. “What for?”

Naruto smiles sharply. “You need to be rewarded for pining this long.“

Kakashi’s voice is breathless. “Oh?”

Naruto wriggles a bit, inching closer. “Oh yes.”

Kakashi hums, nestling in, ghosting his clothed lips over a whiskered cheek. Watches, as Naruto shivers, through slitted eyes.

He breathes the words. “Let’s go then.”

 

Naruto sighs, fingertips stroking the mask, his pupils wide. “Yes. Let’s go.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

It is easy.

 

Now. 

 

That is the one and only thought that flits through Kakashi’s brain when they enter the house, and Naruto giggles, breathlessly, pulling him by his hand and falling back agains the wall with him.

 

It’s easy to let him pull down the mask, and fall into a kiss, a kiss that’s deep immediately, and hungry, and everything.

 

It’s easy to fall right into lust.

It’s easy to get light-headed with the feeling of righteousness, the desire slamming through him. The shivers that spread wherever they touch, the burning of his gut, and his tattoo, and his mind.

 

Kakashi sighs into the kiss, following the gliding of tongues, and lips, the cadence of moaned breaths. 

Naruto kicks the door shut, while tugging at the hem of Kakashi’s shirt. 

While sucking on Kakashi’s tongue.

While moving his hips. Pointedly.

 

Kakashi hums, and then raises his palms, placing them onto Naruto’s cheeks, gentling the kiss.

Naruto mewls a bit, his eyes dark when he opens them again. 

His voice is raw, speaking while nipping and pulling, with his teeth. “What.”

Kakashi grins into a light bite, humming. “Easy… let me worship you. We can do the hard and fast later.”

Naruto grunts, and then reaches up, to tilt Kakashi’s head with a small tug, pushing his tongue deep. Sending fire all through Kakashi’s body, his world reduced to him, and the taste of him, and the heat. Naruto withdraws a bit, nipping again, with a groan. “Really?”

Kakashi chuckles, while his hands drop to unfasten Naruto’s pants. “Really. Let me.” He leans in, whispering against Naruto’s lips now. “Let me show you how I want it to be.”

Naruto shivers. While swallowing compulsively.

Kakashi hums, while dropping his gaze to the hard length in Naruto’s pants, at the wet spot that has already spread through the cloth. 

He feathers the tips of his fingers over the cloth, watches as Naruto shivers, biting back a groan.

He licks his lips. “However, I don’t want to torture you…”

 

He sinks to his knees, very slowly, nipping on a clothed nipple while passing, breathing on the hidden flesh.

Naruto mewls, clenching his fists in Kakashi’s hair. Sending goosebumps all over his body.

Kakashi’s mouth waters. 

 

He swallows, pressing the words out. “So let me taste you, first. I bet Kurama will help, later.”

Naruto laughs, a bit pained. “I won’t be able to stop.”

Kakashi hums, looking up with a small grin. “So don’t.”

 

Naruto moans, loudly.

 

Kakashi grins, sharply, while tugging down Naruto’s pants, slowly. 

While inhaling, deeply, almost light-headed from the smell. And the desire to taste, that’s coming with it. 

He sighs, when he’s done, pushing his cheek along the soft skin, feeling the full-body tremble that runs through Naruto. 

New precome oozes, and the sticks out his tongue, laps at it. Traces the veins with the tip of his tongue.

Hears Naruto curse, viciously. He grins. This won’t take long.

He sighs, mouthing along the hard cock now, to nip at the head, closing his lips around it to suck, just once. Swallows another rush of precome down, with a moan.

Hears Naruto whisper his name now, pained.

He withdraws just a bit, to look up, and then opens his mouth, while his fingers find the base of the shaft, holding it, gently. His other hand reaches to roll the drawn-up balls, just as gently, making Naruto grimace in abject pleasure. Obviously fighting to hold back. 

Kakashi sticks out his tongue, and flicks it against the head.

Naruto moans, deeply.

 

And then Kakashi moves forward, gliding in, swallowing completely, feeling the head push at the back of his throat. He ignores the gag reflex, ignores the slight discomfort, pushes forward, until his lips touch his own hand. Hears Naruto’s shout. His hand drops from the cock to one leg, lifts it up, over his shoulder.

The cock on his tongue pulses.

Naruto’s fingers are vices now, pulling harshly.

He pushes in, even further.

 

Makes room for himself, in Kakashi’s throat.

 

Kakashi mewls, mind static, and soul filled with need, and then swallows. Asking, silently.

 

Needing, with a pure single-mindedness that is as sheer as it is addictive. 

 

Naruto pulls, once, and then pushes again, once, settling, deep, deep down Kakashi’s throat.

Kakashi’s finger pushes in, drily, knowing the burn is the perfect counterpoint, reaching and rubbing in the moment Naruto comes, in pulses, and Kakashi swallows, feverishly, sucking, and pressing his finger onto the prostrate, knowing he prolongs until it is almost painful. 

 

Knowing the orgasm is as sharp as Naruto’s cry.

 

Knowing his suckling on the softening cock is torture.

Aware, that Naruto is still holding him in position.

Delighting in the knowledge that Naruto obviously likes this edge to it, too.

 

The taste of salt, and just pure him is inflaming.

 

Kakashi pushes his tongue into the slit, wanting more.

 

Naruto hisses, and then curses, with a laugh, while his fingers knead. “Fiend.”

Kakashi hums, and then withdraws until he is only nipping, speaking against wet skin. “And you love it.”

Naruto grunts, and then sighs, letting his head fall back against the wall. “I do.”

 

Kakashi licks his lips, sighs, while wiping his fingers with the tug-in handkerchief. "I like your taste on my tongue.“

Naruto exhales, shudderingly, letting one hand drop from Kakashi’s head to push two fingers into his mouth. 

Moans a shuddering breath when Kakashi sucks on them, languidly. 

And then pushes up, just as slowly, while keeping sucking. 

 

He reopens eyes he wasn’t aware he had closed when he is standing again, opening them to Naruto‘s flushed and sated, and bothered and yet playful expression, echoing the grin while slowly releasing the digits. 

Naruto licks his lips, while pulling him close with his wet fingers. "I wanna taste…“

Kakashi mewls, leaning in, and then opens himself to the kiss, a deep kiss, exploring and gliding, and wet. 

Naruto breaks it, eventually, eyes slitted, the blush on his face alluring. 

Kakashi presses a kiss to the tip of his nose, making him giggle. "And now… let me worship you.“

Naruto hums, eyes glittering. "That wasn‘t worship?“

Kakashi waggles his eyebrows. "That was hunger. And I‘m still hungry…“

Naruto swallows. 

And then looks down at himself, at his pants around his ankles, and his hanging-out cock, that’s half-hard again already. "You should undress me then.“

Kakashi flashes a grin. "Oh, I will…“

He bends down a bit and then lifts Naruto up and over his shoulder in one fluid motion, enjoying the yelp and then the free giggle, giving the blank buttocks on his shoulder a playful slap. “You’re mine now, remember?”

Naruto snorts, and then relaxes, hands gliding down Kakashi’s back to squeeze his buttocks, too.

Kakashi hums, making his way to the living room, hearing Naruto snort. “You have no idea how long I wanted to do this…”

 

Kakashi opens his mouth to answer, but stops in the entrance to the room, staring at … the area made up with blankets and linens, and towels, off to the side. With a basket full of little tubes, and a card. With water bottles, and champagne, snacks and fruit.

 

Fresh fruit.

 

He’s not sure whether he sounds like himself. “You’ve really planned this.”

Naruto snorts, and then wriggles until Kakashi puts him down, eyes gleaming in the light of the sun streaming in through the drawn shutters. 

He shrugs, hands reaching up to start pushing off Kakashi’s jacket. “Of course? I’ve asked Obito and Sensei Iruka to help me bring it here.” He tilts his head to look at the scene. “Guess the card’s from them.”

Kakashi swallows, and then looks at him, voice rough. “I see.”

Naruto rolls his eyes just a bit, tone heavily teasing, while he throws the jacket off to the side and reaches for the buttons on Kakashi’s shirt. “Well, you know, my phases didn’t quite work as I intended…”

Kakashi grins, interjecting. “You really thought I would… succumb through closeness?”

Naruto sends him a skunk eye, tone lofty. “Well, Mom said it was like that for bonded couples? Because of the proximity?”

Kakashi hums, and then reaches up also, to start unbuttoning, too, through the open jacket. “Yes, but we have been in proximity for… so long.”

Naruto swallows, and then nods, tone dry. “Yeah, I should have known I’d have to get you through…”, he grimaces, scoffing with heavy tease obvious in the tone, “logic.”

Kakashi snickers. 

And then leans in to kiss him, just like that, delighting in the fact that he is allowed to, that he can, that Naruto sighs, happily, and that it is… right.

He shifts his hands into the open shirt now, pushes it and the jacket off of Naruto’s shoulders. 

Looks down, watches the sun and shadows play with the lines of the fishnet shirt. 

Let’s himself get a bit high on the body so close.

The body that’s fine and toned, as shinobi’s tend to be. Unmarred, thanks to the bijou. 

The skin is dusted in gold, and Naruto is quite obviously aroused, nipples hard and cock standing proudly again already, for him.

Kakashi exhales, a shuddering breath. 

 

He kneels down, slowly, bypassing the flesh on his way this time, reaching out to remove Naruto’s shoes, gently lifting one leg after the other out of them and the scrunched up pants, shoving it all off to the side when he is done. 

 

Looking up, deliberately.

 

The cock in his field of vision twitches.

 

Kakashi grins, and then pushes up again, not touching, and then reaches for his own belt, and pants, unfastening them slowly. While holding Naruto’s gaze.

Which is dark again once more, Naruto’s cheeks flushed.

Naruto licks his lips, eyes dropping down the moment Kakashi’s pants and underwear fall to the floor.

Naruto gasps soundlessly, and then chuckles, breathlessly, shamelessly eyeing Kakashi’s erection. “I guess you were right. That won’t be a problem.”

Kakashi hums, and then leans in again, to whisper a kiss to Naruto’s lips. “Told you.”

Naruto hums and grins into the kiss, and then drops down, too, to slip the shoes off Kakashi’s feet, shoving it all away, before leaning up and licking along the underside of Kakashi’s cock, just like that. Sending a flash of burning lust all through him.

The grin can be heard in Naruto’s voice. “Turnabout is fair play.”

Kakashi’s voice is a bit pressed. “I don’t have Kurama, so don’t play too hard right now.”

 

Naruto hums, waggling his eyebrows. “Right. And I really want this to make me really, really happy later.”

Kakashi grunts, not trusting his words.

Naruto pushes back up, with a fiendish grin - and a come-hither-look. 

He whispers. “Wanna try out how well Sensei Iruka and Obito have set up the bed for us?”

Kakashi swallows, and then flits his gaze to the mentioned bed for a moment. “How on earth did you get Iruka to prepare this for us? I mean… Obito I understand, but Iruka?”

Naruto weighs his head, and then shrugs, tone lofty. “A healthy dose of blackmail?”

Kakashi blinks. “What?”

Naruto chuckles, and then reaches for his hand, steps back towards the bed with him, slowly. “Oh just… reminded him that I didn’t make a fuzz out of your threesome.” Naruto’s eyes darken further, voice husky. “I feel like I’m entitled to some help there.” He grins. “Obito was all excited…”

Kakashi blinks, and then dubiously eyes the basket. “Uh oh.”

Naruto snickers. 

 

And then he drops Kakashi’s hand, and slowly lowers himself to the bed, wriggling until he is comfortable. 

He lifts his hands over his head, totally unashamed in his nudeness, watching Kakashi watching him. 

There is a tease in his voice though, accentuating the arousal in it beautifully. “You are welcome to worship me now?”

Kakashi grins, and then reaches up to remove his own fishnet shirt, and his mask, throwing them carelessly off to the side. He reflects for a split second on the fact that he anticipated feeling weird, before, but now… it just feels right. 

He settles next to Naruto, slowly, before bending down and inhaling at the soft skin of Naruto’s pectorals, very close to his arm pit, the soft hair there tickling. 

Naruto snickers.

Kakashi does it again, delighting in the goosebumps spreading.

He speaks against soft skin. “I wasn’t aware that you are ticklish?”

Naruto hums, obviously resisting the urge to squirm away from Kakashi’s lips. “A bit.”

Kakashi grins, and then follows the skin over to a dark nipple, licking it, and then blowing at it. Watches, as Naruto shudders. Kakashi bites into the meat next to it, just softly, before letting the tip of his tongue circle it, lightly. 

Naruto’s breath is heavy. 

Kakashi blinks, and then reaches, before he does it again. Worrying the nipple with his teeth, too.

 

Naruto curses, and then comes, violently, his come splattering the side of Kakashi’s face, and into his hair.

 

Kakashi stares at him, stunned, watches Naruto gasping for breath.

And then starts to chuckle, while reaching for a towel. “I guess you are too sensitive right now for too much play.”

Naruto mewls, undulating, and pushing his fingers through his own hair. 

His voice is breathless. “I don’t need much when it comes to you…” He hesitates, and then smiles, blindingly. “You should have seen my orgasms when I think of you…” He snickers, and then looks down at himself, a bit self-deprecatingly. “I guess I should have known the real thing would be overwhelming?”

Kakashi throws the towel off to the side, next to their clothes, and then shuffles up, to grin down at Naruto. He reaches out, to flick the other nipple, watching Naruto hiss. “Soooo, maybe worshipping later?” He lowers his voice, locks his gaze with Naruto’s dark one. “When I’ve properly exhausted you?”

Naruto swallows. 

He reaches for Kakashi with his left hand, playing with the hair in his neck. “That might take a while…”

Kakashi hums, watching the seal on Naruto’s stomach flare up for a few seconds, before it disappears again. “I see.”

Naruto licks his lips, words a whisper. “Kurama is insatiable… And so I am, too.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, voice husky. “Lucky me.”

Naruto groans.

His voice is heated, gravelly. “I’ve been dreaming of fucking you, for hours. For days. Using my clones on you when I have to recuperate.”

Kakashi swallows, trying to ignore the pang of fire in his guts. 

He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “What else?”

Naruto smiles, sharply, fangs flashing. “I know you like my fangs, and my claws… you teased me with making you bend over a while ago… I’ve been dreaming of hunting you, making you submit.”

Kakashi clears his throat, knowing he is flushed. 

Knowing he is leaking, now, too.

Naruto ’s voice is a whisper now, intense and unleashed. “I’ve been dreaming of riding you on the market place, with everyone watching. Making clear who you belong to.”

 

Kakashi shivers, and then looks up, to state. “I belong to you.”

Naruto hums, and then pulls him in, pushes their foreheads together. “Yes. You belong to me.”

He lowers his other arm, and then reaches over to the basket. Pulls it close, unseeing, while rummaging around in it.

His eyes find Kakashi’s, on short distance. “Take me now then. Make me yours.” He hesitates, and then grins, wildly. Freely. “Make me come on your cock.”

Kakashi grunts, squeezing his eyes shut for a long moment. 

He shakes his head, once. “We need a bit more prep…”

Naruto interjects, calmly. “Just go slow.”

Kakashi blinks, staring at him. Knowing he should object. “Naruto…”

Naruto lifts his eyebrows, tone gentle. “I’m no virgin. Neither are you. We know what to do.”

Kakashi stares at him, for a long moment. 

And then looks down at himself, pointedly. “It might still hurt?”

Naruto snickers, with a dark undertone to it. “I’m actually counting on it. Otherwise I’ll come again on first push, I just know it.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he snorts.

Naruto spreads his legs, slowly.

Grins, around the words. “On my back though. I want to see your face, even though it might be not the best position. But you can fuck me through the blankets later.” He snickers. “Or I will.”

Kakashi hums, and then rolls on top of him, waggling his eyebrows. “Oh?” He shifts his hips a bit, watches as Naruto’s pupils dilate further. “Really think you can?”

Naruto’s grin broadens. “Only if you ask nicely.”

Kakashi grins, shifting down a bit, between his legs. He turns his head to press a kiss to Naruto’s thigh. “I’ll probably beg.”

Naruto hums, around a snort. “Yes. You will.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “That something Iruka told you?”

Naruto strokes along his own stomach, his cock refilling slowly. “Obito mentioned you needed to be taken out of your own head.” He snorts. “But then I know that.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, just a bit. “Well. Then I’m looking forward to you trying, later.”

Naruto’s teeth flash, with a grin. “So am I.”

Kakashi echoes the grin, and then licks along the cock, nipping a bit at the head, before pushing up, and reaching for the basket.

 

Rummaging around it, for a moment.

 

He pulls out a small plastic bottle. “Oh I knew it.” He holds up the bottle, for Naruto to see. “It’s flavored.” 

Naruto snorts, with his tongue sticking out for a moment, shifting up onto his elbows for a better look. “What kind?”

“Ahhh….” Kakashi looks through the various tubes and bottles again. “Strawberry, cherry… there’s something called ‘Hot & cold’, I’m actually a bit scared, and … cucumber?” He blinks. “The other seems to be chocolate, but we’re not taking that.”

Naruto tilts his head, watching him, while his hands stroke leisurely along his body. “No?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “Nope. Long story. And one not for now.” He refuses to feel anything, in regards to chocolate, and pulls out the cherry one. “If I may make a very bad joke… may I pop your cherry now?”

Naruto snorts, and then giggles, helplessly. “Oh my god, that was bad.”

Kakashi shifts a bit, opening the bottle and squeezing some on his right hand fingers. 

He waggles his eyebrows. “There’s so much more where that’s coming from.”

 

Naruto snorts again, settling back down while shaking his head once with his eyes closed, and then gasps, when Kakashi pushes two fingers in, gently, unrelentingly, bypassing the gland on purpose.

Emulating the motion for a moment.

A shivers runs through Naruto’s body.

His voice is rough. “I thought we said no foreplay.”

Kakashi hums, watching his own fingers disappear and reappear, feeling strangely out of body. “Everything about us is foreplay… why stop now?”

He twists his finger, pushing in properly and Naruto mewls, while his cock fills out further.

Naruto swallows, with a gasp, and then drops his hands to his thighs, lifting his legs to hook under his knees.

He lifts his chin, just a bit. “Would you, please, fuck me already? I’ve come twice already, and I really, really want you in me now?” He glowers a bit at Kakashi. “If you make me come on your fingers, Kakashi, so help me God…”

Kakashi grins, fiendishly, while twisting his fingers again. Watches as the cock bops. “Why? Don’t want another orgasm?”

Naruto snarls. “Yes. But with you in me.” His face twists, and then softens, the words surprisingly brittle. “Holding you close. Kissing you. Embracing you.”

Kakashi swallows, and then he withdraws his fingers, slowly, wiping them on a towel. He reaches for more lube, silently, glad that it’s cold when he puts it on.

He feels feverish, strung high suddenly. 

 

Naruto sniffs, with a nod. “I know.”

Kakashi blinks, looking up.

 

And then he crawls up, pressing a kiss to the soft skin over Naruto’s heart in the process, before he reaches for him, holds onto him, presses their foreheads together for a moment. 

Naruto drops his legs again, embraces him instead, voice breathless. “Kaka-kun.”

Kakashi shivers.

He opens his eyes, finding Naruto’s.

 

His hand drops down, to find Naruto’s leg, and push it over his shoulder.

Naruto swallows.

Kakashi shifts, to do the same with the other leg, and then pushes up a bit, aligning.

Bending Naruto in half, ignoring that the position is probably not too comfortable.

 

Watches as Naruto shivers. Feels the way the fingers dig into his skin, holding fast.

Kakashi blinks. And for all your bravado… this is as mind-blowing for you as it is for me.

Just as life-changing.

He smiles, gently, and then hums, pushing his nose along Naruto’s nose, earning him a shaky laugh.

 

And then he shifts his weight, lets gravity do the work.

 

Watches as Naruto’s mouth drops open, as his pupils blow even wider.

Heat and pressure come, excruciatingly slow, while Naruto pants, the rapid breaths broken by small moans, and a high note, that Kakashi knows is pain.

He fights to keep it slow, lets Naruto adapt, listening closely.

The moment the cadence changes he grins, and shifts just slightly, changing the moan completely.

 

Naruto breathes the word, eyes unseeing on Kakashi’s. “Fuuuuuck.”

Kakashi chuckles, and then rolls his hips, precisely, just a bit.

Naruto mewls.

 

Kakashi tilts his head a bit, whispers against that panting mouth. “Ready?”

Naruto groans, and then kisses him, wildly, before answering, with a gasp. “Oh god yes.”

His hands shift from Kakashi’s back and shoulders to his hair, clenching in it, holding Kakashi’s face close.

Kakashi shivers, trying to ignore how fire rushes through his veins, how his tattoo pulses, in time with his heart.

 

How the pressure builds, at the base of his spine.

 

He pulls out, and then pushes back in, immediately, setting a deep, and yet gentle rhythm that takes both their breaths, and voices, and words, a precise and vicious rhythm that leaves no room for doubt, or pause.

 

Naruto is taut beneath him, silent, and Kakashi pushes forward even more, puts his elbows to either side of his head, his fingers into short gold.

Naruto’s mouth drops open, his eyelids fluttering, and Kakashi smiles at him, beatifically, before increasing the pace, his body a furnace, sweat dripping from his lower back, 

 

The slaps are loud now, and then… Naruto pulls him down.

 

Kisses him, as if drowning.

Like needing nothing else besides him.

 

With kisses, that take the air from Kakashi’s lungs, and feed him, beyond the physical.

 

Kakashi doesn’t know when he starts crying, only knowing that he is.

He doesn’t know when Naruto comes, only that that smell is there now, too, that smell he loves, there between them, and that Naruto is laughing, into the kiss.

Mewling now, too, clutching his shoulders. 

Asking, for more, silently.

 

And Kakashi obliges, though he doesn’t know how.

 

Moans now, loud, and free, and filled with laughter, dripping from Naruto’s mouth.

 

Kakashi bites them from Naruto’s lips, wanting to drown in this sound, this sound that is sheer happiness somehow.

 

Naruto’s eyes sparkle at him, filled with so much love Kakashi cannot look at them.

 

And then Naruto reaches for him, touches his soul, and his mind, and Kakashi’s body gives, simply, offering itself.

 

The white-out of pleasure is searing, thrumming through him on a level that he hoped for, probably. Has dreamed about, maybe. 

 

Takes his senses, and mind, leaving only him behind, there, in his soul.

 

 

 

 

Time is fleeting, static, now, while ecstacy lasts. 

 

 

 

 

Naruto giggle-hums, holds him through the shaking, peppering little kisses everywhere he can reach. Delights in the fact that Kakashi doesn’t seem to be able to move his limbs, and really doesn’t want to separate them.

Moans and sighs when Kakashi slips out, eventually, mewling softly. 

Reaches down to put a hand between them, and press it a bit awkwardly over Kakashi’s still thundering heart.

 

Naruto sniffs, his other hand playing with the tufts of Kakashi’s hair. “I love you.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, face burrowed into his neck. 

He licks his lips. Tries. “I…”

Naruto hums, shaking his head just a bit. “Shhh. I just realized I hadn’t said it, earlier. Yesterday, I mean. And I want to say it.” He swallows, and then shapes the words, deliberately. “I can say I love you now. Freely, I mean. And I can say that waiting for sex with you was a pain in the ass, pun intended,” Kakashi snorts, and he can feel Naruto grin, before continuing, “but that it was worth it, also. That it feels right, now.” He shifts a bit, using his grip on Kakashi’s hair to separate them enough to look at Kakashi. “That I cannot wait to try out all these insinuated promises.” He grins.

Kakashi snorts, and then nestles back in, mourning the moment when Naruto’s legs slip down, to loosely wrap around his lower legs. 

He clicks his tongue. “Well, I’m very relaxed right now?”

Naruto snickers. “The thought has crossed my mind.” He hums, and then sighs, tightening his arms. “But this is even more important, right this moment.”

Kakashi smiles softly, feeling the thrum of the heartbeat through the skin beneath his lips. Feeling the way the cock between them refills, slowly.

He shakes his head, just a bit. “You are insatiable.”

Naruto chuckles. “I promise it’ll be manageable if we have sex on a regular basis.”

Kakashi quirks his eyebrows. “Really… what is regular to you?”

Naruto hums, and then shrugs, softly. “Oh, you know, mornings and evenings maybe?”

Kakashi grunts. And then snorts. “Well, that’s one way for you to get to be Hokage then, I guess. Because you’ll be the death of me.”

Naruto laughs out loud, and then chuckles, silently. “Ahhh, no worries. I’ll pour my chakra into you. That’ll help.”

Kakashi shivers, remembering the taste of that chakra, that taste that had stayed on his tongue for so long. That had burned, down his throat. “Oh yeah?”

 

Naruto licks his lips. “Oh yes. Want some now?”

Kakashi blinks, and then shakes his head, just a bit. “Later. Now…”

Naruto hums, shifting his hand from Kakashi’s heart to hug him, tightly. “Yes.”

Kakashi whispers against golden skin. “We’re gonna stick together.”

Naruto weighs his head, just a bit, while wriggling to find a more comfortable position. “Who cares.”

Kakashi snorts, softly. “You will, later.”

Naruto scoffs. “Yeah, but that’s later.”

Kakashi smiles, widely, and then nestles in even further, the air cool on his sweaty back, the body beneath him sheer heat. And darkness comes, with a breath, gently, like a veil.

 

 

For a while.

 

 

 

 

He wakes up again to Naruto nipping along his face, counting his eyelashes. Smiling when Kakashi opens his eyes again, but ignoring him, continuing his soft and gentle exploration, blue eyes following the tips of his fingers. 

The scar is feathered across, mapped out, with touch and kiss. 

Naruto grins while his lips touch the beauty mark on Kakashi’s skin, sighs when he traces Kakashi’s lips. 

Asks silently, before pushing Kakashi’s mouth open, running the pads of his fingers along the eyeteeth. 

 

Kakashi watches him, watches the golden lashes cast shadows on that mobile face.

 

He clears his throat, quietly, whispering. “You are beyond beautiful. Beyond what I … hoped for.” Your soul and body.

Naruto blinks up, and then grins, expression carrying wonder. “Right. I mean so are you, I’m…” He shakes his head, whispering, too. “It’s so addictive to feel. To reach. To know I can bend down and taste you.”

He shifts, and then hisses, when sticky hairs get pulled. “Damn.”

Kakashi grins, softly. “Told you.”

Naruto glowers at him, playfully. And then lifts his eyebrows. “Shower?”

Kakashi snorts. “Darling, this house has an outhouse.”

Naruto blinks, and then stares at him, a bit horrified by the implications. “Oh damn?”

Kakashi snorts. “How about some wet towels? If we’re lucky the water in the kitchen still runs.”

Naruto groans, and then separates them, carefully, with a nod. “Yes please?”

Kakashi chuckles, and then pushes up, taking two towels in the process. “Be right back.”

 

He turns towards the kitchen, snorting when Naruto whistles after him, playfully.

 

The tap creaks when he opens it, gurgles, but eventually water comes, muddy at first but clearing by the second and Kakashi waits for a moment, before soaking the towels, wringing them out just enough to not drip on the floor while carrying them over.

 

He kneels down next to Naruto, who is watching him silently, propped up on his side on his elbow, and then starts to wash him, gently, without rush.

 

He draws a finger over the damp skin on Naruto’s thigh, watches goosebumps break out, the fine golden hair sticking up. 

He blinks, and then starts to clean himself, but Naruto shifts, with a click of his tongue, and then takes the towel from him, pushing Kakashi down, silently, and then starts to clean him, too, eyes following the sheen of moisture. 

 

Naruto pauses when he is done, looking down at Kakashi, and then bends down to kiss the middle of the scar Obito made, the one over his chest. Over his heart. 

Naruto whispers. “He told me that x marks the spot.” He looks up, finds Kakashi’s eyes. “He’s right.” Kakashi opens his mouth, but Naruto shakes his head, once, and then sighs, softly, while tracing the ‘x’, shifting over to another scar, on Kakashi’s pectoral. “What’s this from?”

Kakashi frowns, trying to remember. “A blade, I believe. While I was Anbu.”

Naruto hums, eyes flitting over to the black tattoo on Kakashi’s upper arm for a moment, before they return to Kakashi’s torso. He lets his fingers glide over several small ones, on Kakashi’s torso and legs, that look a bit like bullet scars. “And these?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, remembering those vividly, the strange sing-song voice. “A… ninja with a spider-like body transformation. The claws were razor sharp.”

Naruto pulls a face, and then traces the line in Kakashi’s abdomen. “This?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Also Obito. He punched one of those black rods through me when I was fighting him in Kamui.” He shakes his head, once. “That was when I knew that he didn’t want to kill me.”

Naruto blinks, tone flat. “You knew that when he punched something into you?”

Kakashi flashes a grin, with a small shrug. “I came onto him, with my front open. Chidori in hand. Theoretically, if he had wanted to really stop me, he should have aimed for my heart.” He snorts. “I mean, he had already marked it, right.” Naruto shoots him a dark look, and Kakashi reaches out, to stroke along his face for a moment. “Shhhh, that is long gone already. We’re here. And besides… Obito picked like the one angle he would only pierce flesh at.” Naruto frowns, and Kakashi continues. “Look at it, and imagine a rod sticking out.” He shifts a bit, to indicate his back. “Under my liver, over my intestines. Not hitting my kidney. Just… flesh.” He snorts. “That was actually quite the feat, in that situation.”

Naruto blinks, the look on his face still sour. He swallows, and then continues, after a roll of his shoulders, nodding at another scar on Kakashi’s left shoulder. “And that one?”

Kakashi frowns, and then shrugs. “That’s another black rod. Pain.”

Naruto grimaces, and then falls back a bit, onto his haunches. 

Kakashi watches him, silently. “What is it?”

Naruto looks away for a moment, with a shake of his head. “It’s just… in a way, all of the pain you endured, all the scars… are because of me.”

Kakashi blinks. 

 

And then shakes his head, very slowly. “That’s…” He hesitates, knowing suddenly he has to tread lightly - and yet has to be honest. “While that is theoretically true…” He reaches up, to turn Naruto’s face back towards him. “It’s actually too simple.” He waits until Naruto’s eyes meet his. “Naruto, I would have had my share of scars anyway. With or without you.”

Naruto pouts. “But my Dad called you into the Anbu. Did your tattoo. Because he wanted you to protect me.”

Kakashi frowns, and then clicks his tongue. “He did. But Naruto…” He sighs, and then shrugs, letting his hand drop down, to entwine their fingers. “I was an orphan, too. A skilled one. They would have made me Anbu anyways. Or I would have fought directly in the war.” He shrugs, just lightly. 

 He tugs on the hand, gently. “We have arrived here though. Where we want to be? You sustained your share of injuries, too, just that Kurama has kept you in perfect shape?”

Naruto snorts, eyes vacant for a split second. “He says thank you for noticing.”

Kakashi grins, and then sobers again, refusing to feel embarrassment. “Not showing any outwards signs of injury does not mean that you didn’t sustain them though. That it didn’t hurt you beyond the physical.”

Naruto sniffs, and then looks away for a moment, before sighing. “I know.” 

 

Kakashi hums. 

 

And then his stomach rumbles.

Naruto snorts, and then bends down, to press a kiss to the skin over the rumbling organ. 

Speaking against skin. “Mhhh, right, we skipped a meal…” He looks up, with a waggle of his eyebrows. “May I feed you?”

Kakashi reaches for him, traces Naruto’s eyebrows for a moment, before dropping his fingers to traces his mouth. “You fed me already, remember.”

Naruto giggles, nibbling on the fingers, before pushing up again. “Still. That won’t keep you sustained indefinitely, and I need you fit.” He shifts, to sit astray on Kakashi’s stomach, keeping most of his own weight off though. He raises his eyebrows, tone lofty. “So. There should be little snacks beneath the food. I asked Sensei Iruka what your favorite dishes were, and asked them to get them.” He leans over, putting the fruit off to the side, and then pulling out small containers. “Tadaaa. Eggplant rolls and onigiri.”

Kakashi watches him, with a grin, and then shifts his hands to just hold Naruto’s soft cock. Feeling it twitch, while Naruto curses. 

And then twists back, container in hand. Eyes flashing. “If you want to play it like that, I guess we’ll see who reaches their respective goal first, hmm?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, mightily amused. “Jerking you off versus feeding me the contents of that container?”

Naruto licks along his lips, biting them, too. “I have some self-discipline?”

Kakashi grins. “Uh huh.”

Naruto grins, but reaches for chopsticks. “You’ll see…” He looks down at himself, and then gesticulates with the sticks a bit. “What are you waiting for?”

Kakashi blinks, and then cackles, shifting his grip. “I expect dessert.”

Naruto snickers, reaching for a piece of the rolls. “I’m sure you do.” He hums, while Kakashi twists his hand, slowly, feels the organ fill out slowly. “Open wide.”

Kakashi opens his mouth, obediently, chewing the delicious little maki, while stroking, softly.

Naruto sighs, shifting just a bit, and opening his thighs further. 

Watching Kakashi chew.

His eyes glitter. “There’s only another 5 pieces. Think you can win this?”

Kakashi swallows, and then rubs the tip of his index finger over and into the slit, pressing just a bit. Naruto curses again, his cock twitching. The smell of precome enters Kakashi’s senses. “I’m sure, yes.” He waggles his eyebrows, and opens his mouth, waiting, and Naruto mock-glowers at him, before feeding him another.

Naruto’s voice is vaguely bothered, when Kakashi strokes properly, a few times. “I’m not that desperate?” He clicks his tongue, while Kakashi chews, and keeps stroking. “Besides, I came a few times already, remember.”

Kakashi grins, swallows, and then shifts his other hand, to roll Naruto’s testicles. “Mhh hhmmm.”

Naruto shivers, eyes falling shut for a long moment. 

He sighs, undulating just a bit. “The scars on your hand from chidori… they tickle.”

Kakashi grins, fiendishly, adding just a tad more electricity. “Just wait. Better hurry.” He opens his mouth, waits until Naruto has fed him the third piece. Pulls, properly.

Naruto moans. And picks up another piece. 

Kakashi snickers, around his mouthful. “You really like your orgasms.”

Naruto grins, widely, while letting his head fall back, a bit. “Who doesn’t. And, I mean, I have to have some advantage from being a jinchuriki, right? Besides the obvious I mean.” He snorts, shaking his head. “Oh come on Kurama, you know what I mean. It wasn’t always fun.” He sobers, just a bit, moving his hips into Kakashi’s pull. “Being able to experience a lot of physical fun is the least.”

Kakashi swallows, frowning for a moment. “Is it like this for the others as well?”

Naruto lifts his eyebrows, and then shrugs. “It is for B…” He leans in a bit, whispering. “Supposedly the ladies really like the tentacles.”

Kakashi blinks and stares, mouth open, carefully trying… not to imagine. 

He clears his throat. “I… see.”

Naruto snickers. “You know in bijou mode I can also have extra… hands?”

Kakashi licks his lips, with a shiver. “… Right.”

Naruto feeds him the fourth maki, and then sighs, when Kakashi spreads the precome a bit, picking up the pace. 

Kakashi chews, a thought occurring to him. He swallows. “I…” He hesitates, and then grins, fiendishly, before opening his mouth again, silently.

Naruto narrows his eyes. “What.”

Kakashi blinks. “Nothing?” He opens his mouth again.

Naruto works his jaw for a moment, and then picks up the fifth piece, feeding it to him.

Kakashi grins around it, and then quickens the pace even more, the cock in his hand thick now, and leaking.

Naruto’s voice is bothered. “I’m gonna win.”

Kakashi waggles his eyebrows, silently, still chewing, and then swallows.

He bites his lips, trying to curb his mirth. “Well, there is only one thing I can say to that then… if it’s like this for all jinchurikis… just imagine how much fun your Mom must have had?”

Naruto freezes above him, staring at him wide eyed, while Kakashi sharply twists his hand in time with the other rolling the balls, adds just a bit more of lightning for good measure… and Naruto undulates, cursing, and then comes, in heaves, onto Kakashi’s chest.

 

To Kakashi’s carefree and rather insolent snickering. 

 

Naruto starts to laugh, silently, head still thrown back, hands holding chopsticks and container rather limply. “Oh god.”

Kakashi starts to laugh with him. Teasing. “Many, many orgasms.”

Naruto shakes with laughter, but with a whine to his voice. “Please stop.”

Kakashi snickers. “I bet your Dad had his hands full.”

Naruto groans, and then hits Kakashi with the chopsticks, lightly. “I said stop?”

Kakashi grins, catching the hand and pulling Naruto down, kissing that smiling mouth, while leisurely pumping him still.

He inhales shakily, with a smile that feels too big for his face, and his mouth, and his soul. “I love you.”

Naruto smiles, too, leaning into him for a moment, before clambering off, putting the container and chopsticks away. “You better.”

Kakashi licks his lips, chasing the remaining taste. “I better?”

Naruto shoots him a look, while reaching for another towel. “Mh hmmmm. Because you’re stuck with me.” He grins at Kakashi. And then looks pointedly down at Kakashi’s cock, which is laying half-hard between his legs. 

Naruto claps his hands. “And now, I’ll blow you. And then, when you’ve come I’ll fuck you, slowly, for a while, until you’ve come again.”

Kakashi swallows, his throat suddenly closed off, while he cleans his hands. “Is that so.”

Naruto grins, reaching for a small pillow. “Oh yes.” He weighs his head. “I think I’ll put you onto your stomach though, because I want to rim you, too.”

Kakashi hisses, feeling himself fire up, cock now hard. 

His voice is pressed. “I see.”

Naruto hums, reaching for the last maki, and putting it into his own mouth.

He speaks while he chews. “No clones today.” He grins. “We’ll push those boundaries later. Just me.”

Kakashi blinks, and then reaches for him with his right hand, butterflies in his gut when Naruto comes to him, immediately. 

 

He whispers the word, feeling it in his soul. “Please.”

 

 

Anything you want.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Morning comes, with the awareness of memories, freshly made.

Of knowledge, carefully stored away.

 

Kakashi knows now that Naruto really likes being held down, while being taken.

That he likes to ride the edge of pain and overstimulation, uncaring of anything physical, courtesy of the bijou.

That he likes to lick champagne off of Kakashi’s skin, and smear him with strawberries, while giggling at Kakashi’s mock-whining.

That keeping him in an embrace while he had rode Kakashi had made him weep.

 

That just kissing him gently, for hours, in the moonlight pouring in through opened windows had healed something in Kakashi’s heart.

That the kisses had been salty, and pure.

 

That Kakashi really has a bit of a kink in regards to Naruto flashing his fangs. Or changing his fingernails to claws.

 

 

That he needs the smell of Naruto’s skin now, almost beyond anything else.

 

That he will never sleep outside their shared bed again.

 

 

That Naruto’s heart stumbles, when Kakashi reaches for him.

 

 

That the chakra pouring into Kakashi when Naruto had kissed him awake tastes of them.

 

That Naruto really is insatiable, slowly rolling into him, a golden god in the early morning light.

 

 

That Kakashi can watch now, unbothered by his own arousal, his body too sated, too tired, and yet flying high, so high.

 

That the muscles in his cheeks hurt from smiling so much.

Laughing so much.

 

 

That watching Naruto’s gaze break, as he pulses deep, deep within Kakashi, is the best thing.

 

 

That Kakashi feels so much love, that he thinks he will burst. 

 

That Naruto snuggles into his embrace, and holds fast, uncaring of the mess.

Needing this, just as much as Kakashi does.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That it was worth the wait.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi encounters a lot of grinning faces, later that day.

Sidelong glances, and well-meaning whispers.

Shikamaru’s eye-roll, with a dry: “Finally.”

 

 

He knows he’s sporting a hickey and a grin under the mask, and that he’s moving way too slow. 

And that Naruto simply glows.

 

He knows he cannot concentrate, his brains apparently mush.

He knows Shizune doesn’t mind much, grinning rather unabashedly.

 

 

He knows Ay is having the time of his life right now, teasing him, after having brought the Benihisago, the Kokinjo and the Bashosen to Konoha for safekeeping. With the comment that they are the only ones with someone proficient enough to use them, too.

 

After taking one look at Kakashi and laughing, for twenty minutes straight.

 

He knows Naruto and Killer-B are off somewhere, out with their bijous.

He grins, just knowing they’ll compare notes. 

And that he’ll hear a lot about tentacle sex, later.

 

 

 

 

He inhales, deeply, returning Ay’s grin, while trying to shift to a more comfortable sitting position.

 

And then snorts, and puts the work away, and takes Ay out for a drink.

 

 

 

Or two.

 

 

 

Notes:

I hope you like that I made it … easy, playful. Still hope the emotional impacts came through^^. But I felt that after all that impact, all that foreplay, all that… tension… they deserved just to… be.
There’ll be more explicit scenes strewn in between the upcoming chapters… just fyi :))

Chapter 57: Toad sage

Notes:

As warned, there’s going to be some intimate/explicite scenes of “them” woven in from now on, as I said, just where it feels right. 😈 Still, errr…. I guess as a small warning, rimming and erotic asphyxiation. 😇

Chapter Text

 

 

 

Iruka sighs, trying for sad, while the smile on his face just doesn’t want to disappear. “Another year gone…”

Kakashi nods, hugging him. “Mhhh hmmmm… and what a year. Happy birthday, Iru-kun.”

Iruka clicks his tongue. “Indeed. Thank you.” He sends Kakashi a sidelong glance while releasing him. “How’s the honeymoon?”

Kakashi blushes, just vaguely, tone mock-gruff. “We’re not on honeymoon…”

“Sure.” Iruka takes a sip of his tea, and then grins, unabashedly. “You’ve been hardly seen for the last three weeks… ever since that wedding you and Naruto are just… gone. Outside your duties, I mean.”

Kakashi clears his throat, and then chuckles, ducking his head. “Yeah, well.”

Obito speaks up, settling next to Iruka on the blanket on the grass in the little garden of Iruka’s house. “And I heard someone is updating the bathroom situation at your old house?”

Kakashi tries for a roll of his eyes, but it’s totally destroyed by his chuckle, the happiness he just doesn’t seem to be able to contain. “Well, if that house is ever to be used…”

Obito grins at him, teeth flashing, eyes sparkling. “I hear it is in good use now?”

Kakashi grunts and then snorts. “The bed you put there is very comfortable. But we need new towels.”

Iruka frowns. “Err… those should have run out a while ago?”

Kakashi waggles his eyebrows, and then looks at Obito, pointedly.

Who blushes, spectacularly. “I… err… I might have gone and exchanged them when Kakashi had meetings… you know? When we could be sure Naruto wouldn’t be there either because he is stuck to Kakashi’s side these days?”

Iruka blinks, and then smirks, just the tiniest bit salaciously. “You… went and did their laundry?”

Obito clears his throat, parts of him quite flushed now. “I figured this was the least I could do….”

 

There is a small pause, and Iruka reaches over, simply puts his fingers through Obito’s.

Silently.

 

Kakashi smiles, softly.

Iruka clears his throat. “So. Where is said plastered-to-your-side young hunk?”

Kakashi snorts, taking a sip of his tea, before answering. “Only out to pick up Anko and Guy… he’ll be here soon.”

“Ah.” Iruka nods. “Sora and his parents will be here soon, too.” He shrugs. “Tenzou and Yugao couldn’t, apparently their little one is having stomach cramps right now…”

Kakashi grimaces, but nods. “Yeah, I put him on some reduced shifts, apparently Aiko is being a bit difficult now as well.”

Iruka nods, with a hum. “That is nothing unusual though. All the attention that used to be focused on her is on the baby now, or at least quite a portion of it. She needs to adapt as well.” He grins at Kakashi. “Best be prepared for that.”

Kakashi grunts. 

And then shrugs, with a chuckle. “I’ve stopped being prepared in regards to him. He’ll just…” He waves his hand. “It’s a futile effort trying to anticipate.”

Obito snorts, just the tiniest bit darkly. “Judging by your towel output that effort is put somewhere else though.”

Kakashi refuses to blush, though he does feel hot, his gut churning. “Well, he is a force of nature.”

 

Naruto’s voice rings out, happily. “Who is?”

Kakashi looks up, catching his gaze, easily. “You are.”

Naruto chuckles, while helping Guy hop down the step of the porch in the wheelchair. 

 

And then Naruto steps over, bending down to pull at Kakashi’s mask and kiss him, just like that, the ease of it just as mind-blowing as the feeling of it, this delicious righteousness, and delight, and desire under it, always.

Kakashi’s hand flies up when he wants to withdraw, holds him a bit, deepening the kiss from gliding lips to a deeper one for just a moment, their tongues dancing. 

Sending shivers down his spine.

He wonders for a split second if he will ever get used to this, will ever get enough, but knows he won’t, the almost vicious pull terribly addictive. 

 

Beautifully fleeting, meant to be chased after, coveted. 

 

Obito clears his throat, loudly. “I think I have prepared you a room?”

 

Naruto snickers, and then breaks the kiss, licking his lips uncaringly, radiating happiness.

With his fingers still clenched in Kakashi’s hair.

Kakashi doesn’t have to look at Iruka to know he’s grinning now, noting that of course.

Naruto clicks his tongue. “And we are putting it to good use?”

Iruka speaks up, the grin very evident in his voice. “I can see that.”

 

Kakashi grins, too, unable to feel anything beyond the rollercoaster love he feels churning in his guts. And his mind. And his soul. 

He tilts his head back a bit, and Naruto’s eyes snap back, and then Naruto is kissing him again, and then there’s a chorus of various exclamations, and good-natured booing, and Naruto giggles into his mouth, before releasing him, and stepping back, settling on Kakashi’s other side. 

Kakashi grins, and then puts the cup away to lace their fingers together, deciding to forego pulling up his mask.

He looks up when a shadow passes over him, Guy’s smile already quite wobbly, but with his hand firmly in Mei’s, when they settle across the low table. 

Anko and Shizune step past Iruka and Obito, settle there.

 

Naruto’s stomach grumbles.

 

Iruka snorts. “Soon.”

Naruto scratches his head, just a bit sheepishly. “Sorry. It’s worse, since…” He trails off, with the faintest blush.

“Mh hmmm.” Iruka snorts. “I bet.” He and Obito share a long look, and then look pointedly at Kakashi. “Remember my request?”

Kakashi nods. “Of course. But we need to wait for them?”

Naruto’s head comes around, the blue eyes filled with the sky, and love, and relaxed teasing. “What request?”

Obito quirks a dark eyebrow. “We want to look at pictures. Without cake smudges.”

Shizune speaks up, tone gentle. “They survived the Pain incident.”

Naruto blinks, slowly. “They survived?” He frowns, shooting a look at Kakashi. “What pictures?”

 

Sora interjects, dropping down silently with Minato, and Kushina next to him. “Pictures I gave Kakashi. When I thought they were the only way to look at them.” She points a thumb, tone mock-self-deprecating. “Look how wrong that was, huh?”

Naruto snickers.

Kushina gasps in half-serious, half-mock mortification. “Oh my god, you shared them?”

Sora shoots her a look and then shrugs. “I’m your Sensei. You genins were sooooo cute. Too cute to keep hidden.”

Minato hums, drawing Kushina into a half-embrace. “Yes. It was the best time of my life. Right after we recognized our bond and went onto joint missions.”

Kushina blinks at him. Minato blinks, too, opens his mouth, and then backpedals a bit. “I mean, then.”

Kushina narrows her eyes. Minato clears his throat. “Of course actually getting married, and you pregnant, and…” He trails off.

Kakashi tries desperately to hide his amusement. 

 

Sora grins. “Yeah, some good times in there.” She sobers, slowly, shares a long look with Kakashi. “Of course not everyone on the pictures is here, now.”

Kakashi quirks his eyebrow, and then shakes his head, the tiniest bit.

Sora exhales, through her nose, ignoring the frown on Naruto’s face. “Alright then.” She looks at Kakashi. “So. You want to pass them around?”

Kakashi hums, and then squeezes Naruto’s hand before letting it go, reaching to the small bag he’s carrying, and pulling out Icha Icha Tactics.

Obito’s tone is dry. “Thank god we’re all adults.”

Kakashi snorts. “Not that kind of pictures.”

Naruto pouts. “Shame.”

Kakashi hits him lightly over the head with the book and an exasperated sigh, ignoring the grins all around. He pulls out the pictures from it, and then hesitates, looking up at Guy for a long moment. “I wished we had some kind of picture of you and me, too…”

Guy grins, teeth flashing. “Ah, my rival, our lives will burn in the minds of those that witness it. What more is there to wish for.”

Kakashi hums, and then shrugs, staring unseeing down at the small stack of photographs in his hand. “Still. We were five when we met.” He snorts. “Imagine.” He sniffs, and then looks up at Obito. “We met shortly after. In class.” He looks back at Guy, and then again at Obito. “I know you’re both trying. And I want to thank you for that.”

Mei smirks, crouching down to hug Guy to herself, hiding her face in his hair. Guy swallows, and nods, once. 

Kakashi smirks, gently, sharing a long look with Obito who gazes back rather solemnly, before concentrating on the small stack. 

 

He clears his throat. “So. I think we’ll just pass them around and let them speak for themselves? There’s some… team photos, and some party photos. Some family photos, too, even of the founders.” He takes the first one, looking at it, before passing it over to Naruto, whose eyes are sparkling, intensely focused on the faded image of Hashirama and Tsunade, playing some kind of card game. His eyes find Sora’s now, sharing a solemn gaze with her. “Hashirama was as you described. Irreverent. Almost goofy. Insanely powerful.”

The corners of Sora’s eyes crinkle. “And throwing it all to the wind once more to be with him.” She chuckles, and shrugs, waggling her eyebrows. “I’m really looking forward to hear how Mito reacted to that.”

Kushina snorts, holding out her hand for Naruto to pass the photo over. “Happy I think. I mean she’ll be there with them? She and Hashirama were so in love as well. She loved him so deeply. It hurt her so badly as well to see him suffering.” She looks up to share a long look with Naruto. “There is love outside bonds, as we all know. And just as with the bonds, it can heal, and it can destroy.” She smirks, looking down at it, before giving the photo to Minato. “Have you shown this to Tsunade?”

Kakashi nods, and then hums. “Yes. She made copies of them, a while ago.” He looks up at Sora. “She’s also digitalized them, she said she talked to you about that?”

Sora nods. “Yes, no worries. They are history after all.”

 

Kakashi nods, and then reaches for the next photo.

Laughing out, once. “This is Jiraiya’s team photo. It always amuses me that the poses of the teams are so similar?” He holds it up for them all to see, before giving it to Naruto. “I wonder if that is some kind of instinct. To set up the teams like that I mean. And then of the teams themselves, to strike those poses.”

Anko snorts. “Hell, even I remember a team photo like that.” She snorts, and then sobers. And frowns. “He was still trying then.”

Naruto hums. “And he is, once more.”

Kakashi blinks, shooting him a look. 

Naruto returns it, with a shrug. “Sage mode, remember?”

Kakashi hums, watching as Naruto concentrates on the photo now, watching the myriad of emotions chase over that mobile face when his eyes travel from Minato to Jiraiya. To the sage before him.

Naruto sniffs. “Ah gosh, I miss him.”

Kakashi swallows, refusing to look at Sora. Or Shizune. 

He clears his throat. “Jiraiya really… is something else.” His heart hammers, praying silently for Naruto not to pick up on the distinction, but unable to lie. 

Naruto sniffs again, eyes unseeing on the photo. “Indeed.”

He passes the photo on, noisily swallows. “Next?”

Kakashi nods, and then holds out Sora’s team photo. “Look how cute your Mom was.”

Kushina speaks up, tone mock-enraged. “Was?”

Minato snickers, and then goes ‘oof’, as Kushina pokes him.

 

Kakashi smiles to himself. 

And then holds up another photo, when Naruto passes the previous on. 

He grins. “And now… look at wee Sora, very, very cute in her own right, with wee Jiraiya and Tsunade.”

A chorus of ‘awwww’s and ‘oooooohhh’s rises up, and Sora rolls her eyes, but blushes, just a bit. 

Her tone is wistful. “It seems like yesterday.” She sniffs, and then chuckles, her eyes finding Kakashi’s. “A fairytale to meet him again.”

Kakashi swallows, but it is Naruto who speaks up, voice firm. “You still have a few years, Sora-san.”

Sora quirks an eyebrow. “Is that so.”

Naruto blinks up, eyes golden and red shadows around them. “Yes.”

Sora hums, and then nods, after a moment, before nodding at Kakashi. “Now, for heaven’s sake, pass that photo around so it can get hidden away again, I was not cute.”

Kakashi chuckles, and then looks down at the irreverent grin of the boy in the picture, shooting a look at the man beside him, who is grinning just as irreverently.

 

He nods, but shakes his head once as he passes the photo over. “No can do.”

 

Next to him Iruka grins, too, enjoying himself immensely, while Obito is obviously fighting tears.

 

Kakashi lifts his head to the sky for a moment, and prays.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“Rokudaime, I need to go visit the Land of Demons.”

 

Kakashi blinks at Lee, leaning back in his chair a bit, muscles protesting from too much… exertion that night. He hides the small wince in a cough. “May I ask why?”

Lee nods, energetically. “I am invited for another visit.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, tone careful. “Wasn’t the last… honor successful?”

Lee smiles, broadly, raising his fist to his heart. Proudly. “It was.” He sniffs. “In fact it seems to have been so successful, that the priestess has asked for a repeat.”

Kakashi exhales, and then nods. “I see.” He tilts his head, watches the young man in front of him closely. “Lee, are you alright with this? You don’t need to follow the invitation, honor or not, you know?”

Something in Lee’s face cracks, the emotion schooled away immediately. “Of course I am, Hokage-sama.” He lifts his chin. “What greater honor than to gift the Land of Demon and Konohagakure with heirs to such a lineage.”

Kakashi sighs, soundlessly, watching him closely. And yet you hurt.

He keeps his voice soft, guessing. “You wish to see the child.”

Lee’s expression crumbles, for a long moment, before it clears again, with an obvious effort. “It is custom that my daughter would stay with her. That is why I was invited after all.”

Kakashi grimaces, stapling his hands. “But knowing and missing are two different things.”

Lee looks away for a long moment. “I do not wish to pass up on this opportunity to see them.”

Kakashi exhales, and then nods. “I understand.” He hums. “Just know that there is no pressure from my side. Konoha already had that honor. It is not something you have to provide.” He hesitates, and then goes on, words careful. “You can also just bring them a gift, if you want to.”

 

Lee frowns, bushy eyebrows shadowing his expression. 

He clears his throat. “I understand.”

Kakashi nods. “Alright. I’m taking you off active roster for the time being. Please meet with Shizune to discuss whether we need to exchange goods or intel with them also, and please work on that with her.” He hesitates, and then shrugs. “It might prolong your stay there, but…”

Lee interjects, beaming. “Every hour I can spend there is appreciated!”

Kakashi smirks softly, giving him an eyes-smile, praying he won’t be able to see the sadness in it. “You are a good man, Rock Lee.”

Lee blushes, and then bows, stammering. “I… thank you, Rokudaime.”

 

Kakashi nods, watching him go, his heart bleeding for him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

The water sloshes as Kakashi moves back a bit, massaging the buttocks for a moment. 

Speaking, like nothing is happening. “Lee is going to visit his child with Shion.”

 

Naruto shivers, laid out over the edge of the pool, upper body flat on the floor, while his legs are in the water. His voice is a bit pressed. “Is that so.”

Kakashi grins, humming. “Yes. I’m glad he took your place then.” He moves in, bites softly into the flesh.

Naruto hisses. “So am I.”

Kakashi grins, and then moves in again, continuing to lick for a while, softly, deeply, until Naruto is a shivering mess beneath his hands, cursing and panting. 

Kakashi breaks away once more, with a grin, bending a bit awkwardly to rinse out his mouth. 

Naruto grunts, and then slaps his hand onto the tiles, hard. 

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “Something you want, darling?”

Naruto growls. “Yes. You, your tongue, your fingers, your dick, whatever of you, in me, making me come.” He pushes a bit up, fires a crossed-pupil-red-iris-gaze to Kakashi. “Like, now.”

Kakashi blinks innocently, and then lets one perfectly shaped cheek go, to reach down into the water, and give the fat and rock-hard cock pressing against the side of the basin a long pull. 

Enjoys the vicious curse and drawn-out moan he triggers immensely.

He waggles his eyebrows. “Patience, honey.”

Naruto spits the words out. “Fuck patience. You’ve been rimming me for two hours. I’ve been ready for an eternity.” 

Kakashi hums, and then feathers the tip of his fingers over the loose muscle, presses in just a bit, feeling the shudder that runs through Naruto.

He states, feeling hot and cold in the warm water. “You’re going to come on first push.”

Naruto shivers, and then spreads his legs further. 

Hissing the words. “So what are you waiting for?” He throws his head back again, the gaze burning. “Make me feel every second of it.”

Kakashi swallows, throat dry, feeling his own arousal sharpen, threaten.

He works his jaw for a moment. “Not sure if we can go for another two hours though.”

Naruto cackles, darkly. “If you continue to make me beg like this, definitely not.”

 

Kakashi sighs, deliberately put-on, and then stands up, slowly, standing over Naruto. Bending forward to hold himself up over him, not touching.

Something in Naruto’s voice breaks. “Kakashiiiii…. Kaka-kun….”

Kakashi hums, and then reaches down, aligning himself, knowing water and spit aren’t the best lubricants, but also knowing that Naruto craves that edge right now, viciously.

Naruto babbles. “Oh god, yes, yes, yes, please.” He pushes up, just a bit, tilts his hips, as much as possible. Breathes the plea. “Make me come on first push. Make me feel you, after.”

Kakashi grunts, with a groaned laugh. “No pressure.”

Naruto giggles. And then moans, deeply, when the head of Kakashi’s cock finds its position, holds.

Kakashi’s voice is pressed. “You’re so open.” So hot. 

Naruto is panting. “You should know why, you fiend.” He snarls, sending another heated look back. “Now fuck me, please, oh so mean bonded of mine.”

Kakashi snorts, and then grabs his hip, using his own feet to push Naruto’s further apart, earning him a whine. 

And then he pushes in, torturously slow, watching in vicious satisfaction as the hair on Naruto’s body start to stand up, the whine that tears itself from Naruto’s throat high-pitched and threaded through and through with need.

Kakashi snarls, and then changes the angle, precisely. Reaches, for good measure.

 

Naruto shakes apart, under his hand, just like that. 

With a laughed curse.

 

Sending a rush of ecstatic delight through Kakashi’s veins.

 

He tries to curb the feeling that is dangerously close to pride, knowing it’s idiotic. And unable to not wallow in it. 

 

Kakashi gasps, fingers bruising on Naruto’s hip, continuing to push while Naruto shakes, his body cramping around Kakashi, and shivering. Naruto’s moans filling the little room, his fingers scrabbling fruitlessly. 

 

Kakashi bottoms out, waits until he can breathe again, until the small hiccup moans and sighs have quieted to heavy breathing. Until the hot spurts against his leg have ceased. 

 

Naruto’s voice is a sated rumble. “Man, that was good.”

Kakashi grins, thumb pressing into the rim just a bit. “Ready for more?”

Naruto’s sigh is dreamy. “Always.”

Kakashi hums. “You’ll be the death of me.”

Naruto chuckles, the vibrations making Kakashi hiss. “But what a way to go?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, gives a little twist of his hips, enjoying the gasp that drips from Naruto’s mouth. “Indeed.”

 

He pulls out, slowly, and then pushes in again, just as slowly, careful to keep the burn to a minimum. 

Naruto undulates, like a cat, tilting his hips a bit.

Humming around the word. “Mhhh, deeper.”

Kakashi snorts, and then presses in even further, holding for long seconds,, before withdrawing again. 

Naruto sighs. “If I’d known it would be this good you’d never would have managed to keep me off you for all those months.”

Kakashi snorts, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment, and then pushes in again, carefully aiming. Glad when the glide gets slightly easier now. 

Enjoying the shudder that runs through the body under his hands.

He clicks his tongue. “Is that so.”

Naruto exhales, and then undulates again, with a groan. “Oh god yes. I’d somehow convinced Sasuke, and we’d have had happy little threesomes every night.”

Kakashi freezes, and then gives a vicious little push, making Naruto grunt, and then laugh.

He doesn’t recognize his own voice, suppressing feeling caught. “I doubt Sasuke would have appreciated that idea.”

Naruto hisses, wriggling his ass a bit. “But you do, I feel how big and hard that makes you?”

Kakashi grunts, trying not to think. Trying not to feel embarrassed, because the imagery invoked is tantalizing indeed, thank you very much. “Can you blame me?”

Naruto snickers. “No. It was one of my favorite fantasies, you know?” He moans around another push, ending with a sigh. “Dreaming of you fucking me, and him, fucking you…”

Kakashi grunts, fire in his veins. 

He feels Naruto squeeze his buttocks, just a bit, increasing the pressure.

Kakashi’s voice carries a warning now. “Naruto…”

 

Naruto pushes up and back, coming up to stand, back pressed into Kakashi’s chest suddenly, the change in angle making them both hiss.

Naruto twists his head back, lifts his arms to reach for Kakashi’s wet hair, pulling him forward into a sloppy, awkward, necessary kiss. 

He grins into the kiss, ferally. “Every night. We could have had fun every night.” His glittering eyes are on Kakashi’s now, wide and demanding. He lifts his chin, just a fraction. “So, better make it up to me.” He leans in, breathes the word against Kakashi’s lips, with an obvious tease. “Sensei.”

 

Kakashi grunts, and then shifts his grip, one hand coming up and around to hold Naruto across the chest, starting a quick, hard pace, that has the water sloshing around them.

Naruto’s finger clench in his hair, eyes glued to Kakashi’s on short distance.

 

His breath puffs rapidly against Kakashi’s mouth.

 

Kakashi snarls, watches the pupils dilate even further.

 

Naruto lets his head fall back, just a bit, the eyes heavily slitted. 

Whispering. Demanding. “Break for me.”

 

Kakashi hisses, and then just lets go, letting the pleasure come, and the need to rut, to fuck, watching Naruto watch him, watches the delight as ecstasy breaks, taking his vision, and mind, and soul, while Naruto pulls him in and kisses him, and takes his breath.

 

 

Narrows down the world, to him, and only him.

 

 

 

 

Time slows, fades.

 

 

 

 

Kakashi returns to reality, pressed back against the basin’s edge, with a smiling and chuckling Naruto plastered against him, cock hard between them. Nipping along his throat.

 

Kakashi swallows, and then hums, embracing him. “Looking for that monster hickey?”

Naruto grins against his skin, intensifying his nipping and worrying the skin for a moment, before he gives the spot a long, intense suck, making Kakashi moan.

He comes up after, licking his lips. “Well, even though no-one will see… I like it that you wear it.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Well, I don’t know about no-one…”

Naruto blinks, lifting his eyebrows.

Kakashi shrugs. “Neji looked at me funnily the other day. He and Hinata have been practicing activating the byakugan without the necessity of finger signs, as you probably know, and I think they do that while out and about and he… looked at me, and then blushed, spectacularly.”

Naruto snickers, and then hums, weighing his head a bit. “Oh, that opens up a whole new set of possibilities…?”

Kakashi blinks, and then simply says, rather heartfelt: “Uh oh.”

Naruto laughs out, a light, carefree sound that tugs at something deep within Kakashi’s soul.

He bites his lips, moves in even further, pressing a gentle, somehow pure kiss to Kakashi’s lips. “No, but really, this is even better… I like it that they can see it that I take good care of you…”

Kakashi grins, stroking along the smooth back. “Oh, that you do.”

Naruto smiles at him, broadly, and then sobers a bit, eyes blinking up. “Are you mad about that threesome fantasy?”

Kakashi frowns. “No, why would I be?” He swallows, and then clears his throat. “I mean, the idea is hot…” He grins, and then tilts his head, watches Naruto closely. “I won’t let you go now, Naruto.” They share a quick grin, and Kakashi’s heart thuds, watching the happy little blush spread over the gentle, proud smile. He hums. “So, at the very least in time, we will need to discuss these fantasies,”, he lifts his eyebrows, watching Naruto watch him, “check if we want to try some of them out, in play or with clones, or even in reality may be open for debate”, he chuckles, shaking his head once, watching Naruto duck his head, just a bit, “but ultimately desires and fantasies and kinks should not be suppressed.”

He hums, leaning in to nose along Naruto’s nose. “And I want to know it all.” He presses a small kiss to the tip, enjoying the low giggle. “Experience it all.” He sobers, shaking his head once. “With you.”

Naruto exhales, shudderingly, and then smiles, brilliantly. “Dito.”

Kakashi blinks and then narrows his eyes. Stating. “Got that from Iruka.”

Naruto snickers. “Yes.” He bites his lips, and then leans in, just a bit. “A propos kinks…”

Kakashi hums, trying to hide his grin. “Yes, dear?”

 

Naruto waggles his eyebrows. “Really learnt about erotic asphyxiation in the Anbu?”

Kakashi snorts a laugh, and then shakes his head. “Not the erotic kind, no, sorry.”

Naruto snorts, too, and then nods, with a sniff. “Oh, good.” He sobers a bit, eyes coming up to Kakashi rather carefully. He reaches up to play with Kakashi’s hair. “I… since I’ve never been Anbu I wondered if there were these kind of missions, too, you know…” He trails off.

Kakashi looks away for a second, and then grimaces. “I would lie if I said that there weren’t.” He hesitates, and then adds, sincere now. “I would lie if I said that there aren’t any now.”

Naruto’s eyes narrow. He opens his mouth to ask, but Kakashi shakes his head, continuing. “But these missions are always voluntary, and the Anbus taking them get special training. They are, however, an effective tool that every village employs.”

Naruto hums, eyes faraway for a moment. “The spy back then. I mean the new warden of the prison.”

Kakashi nods. “Yes. For example. Jiraiya did his own version of that… tool.”

Naruto frowns. “Right.” He snorts. “Ero-Sennin really enjoyed his version, too.”

Kakashi hums, quirking an eyebrow. “Yes.”

 

Naruto rolls his shoulders, and grimaces. “I… cannot imagine sending someone on a mission like that.”

Kakashi grimaces, too. “It’s always uncomfortable.”

Naruto sniffs. “And I’ll grow into it?”

Kakashi shrugs. “Eventually? There are things you have to do while kage. Things that aren’t much fun. But need doing.” He hesitates, and then hums, trying for some levity once more. “But that’s something for later. “ He waggles his eyebrows. “Now, where were we?”

Naruto swallows, and then bites his lips,, waggling his eyebrows, too. “You wanted to show me erotic asphyxiation?”

Kakashi snorts. “Oh really.”

Naruto hums, blushing just a bit. “Yeah.”

Kakashi blinks at him, and then narrows his eyes. “That’s been on your mind?”

Naruto clears his throat, coloring even deeper. “Well, you know I like being held down?” He swallows, voice rough. “How much more being held down than letting you strangle me a bit while riding me can there be?”

Kakashi hums, watching him, while a hot flash shoots through him. “It can be scary.”

Naruto swallows again, tilting his head. Breathing the words. “I also heard it can be ecstatic.”

Kakashi swallows, too. 

 

Needing suddenly, with a laser-sharp focus, that throbs through him. 

His voice is rough. “On the bench.”

Naruto shivers, mouth dropping open, and then pushes back and clambers out, strutting over to the small bench off to the side, and laying down onto it matter-of-factly, hands opening and closing into fists.

Kakashi follows him a bit more slowly, silently, reaching for the small package of lube in their clothes, before stepping over, preparing himself perfunctory on the way.

Feeling light-headed, out of body.

 

Naruto’s eyes are black, his cock bopping over his stomach.

His voice is rough, shivering. “I want to see some of your darkness.”

Kakashi blinks, and then looks up at him, very slowly. “I…”

Naruto interjects, almost hastily. “We both have loads of it. I’m safe to let it go with. Trust me.” He smiles, beatifically, for a moment. “So please… ride me. Ride me hard. Take my breath.”

Kakashi swallows. And then steps over to him, straddling him, silently.

Positioning him, silently.

 

Naruto’s eyes glitter, coals rimmed with blue, and promising fire.

 

His hands glide up Kakashi’s thighs, hold, lightly.

 

Kakashi bears down, a sudden, almost brutal move that makes Naruto almost shout, and Kakashi doesn’t feel the burn, the almost-pain hidden in the flash of satisfaction.

He hesitates when he bottoms out, panting, feeling the way he is filled, the way Naruto throbs with in him. The way he adores this feeling. Needs it.

Naruto exhales, shudderingly.

 

Kakashi blinks, very slowly, and then positions his hands, with his weight behind it.

Watches as Naruto gasps, silently, eyes fixed to his.

 

Kakashi pushes up, just a bit, and then falls back down, in a seesaw motion that adds and releases pressure in increments. 

 

It’s silent, the only sounds the small squelching sounds of their joining, and the rapid puffs of breath, through Kakashi’s nose.

He feels Naruto pulse, shudder, grow even bigger.

 

He smiles, ferally, and then closes his eyes for a moment, increases the motion. 

Increases the pressure.

 

A sound steals itself out of Naruto’s chest, a sound borne of need, and darkness, and relief, and Kakashi gasps, coveting it, knowing he needs to hear it again.

He tightens his hands.

 

Naruto’s mouth drops open, silently, eyes wide on Kakashi’s. 

His body is taut beneath Kakashi, like a spring, and Kakashi shuffles just a bit, closes his legs, squeezes. Gets faster. 

 

There’s slapping now, harsh, loud, and Kakashi’s panted breaths.

Naruto’s eyelids flutter. He feels hot within Kakashi, hot and ironlike, and immovable. Kakashi gasps, unable to escape the feeling, shuddering now.

He feels Naruto twitch, the muscles protesting and snarls, hastening the pace, which is rapid now.

 

Lightning runs from Kakashi’s hands into Naruto’s throat. Naruto‘s eyes are fixed, on his. 

Seeing. 

 

Kakashi blinks, let’s him see. 

Let’s some of the need bleed through. 

The dark obsession that claws deep, deep within him, tampered by the sheer love he feels. 

That he hides, most of the time. 

 

 

Naruto undulates, silently, eyes wide, the power of his body no match for Kakashi’s weight or strength, powering up and into him, just once, head thrown back, with a silent scream.

 

There is a moment of nothing, nothing besides them.

Kakashi opens himself, reaches.

 

 

 

And then Naruto pulses, and Kakashi… laughs.

 

 

 

Delight, rushing through his veins, in a pleasure so direct, and yet so abstract he cannot properly process it.

 

Darkness and flashes, little explosions of light, mixing with rivulets of lightning, dancing along skin.

 

The out of body feeling of floating, and being anchored by their joining.

 

 

The pleasure of that first breath once more, when Kakashi relaxes his cramped hands. 

 

 

The tear that falls down Naruto’s face, tickling on Kakashi’s skin.

 

 

The bruise that fades, taking the restriction in Kakashi’s throat away.

 

 

The smile that Naruto smiles, so deeply sated Kakashi can only giggle.

 

 

 

 

The loss he feels, when Naruto slips out.

 

 

 

Naruto hums, pulling him in, to press their foreheads together. 

He is sweaty, and red, and Kakashi breathes with him now, feeling the chest rise and fall, rapidly first, and then more slowly. 

Feels the way the seed leaves him, tickling his skin.

 

Naruto licks his lips, trying to open his eyes. “That was good.”

Kakashi grins, but puts a pout into his voice. “I’m a bit insulted.”

Naruto snorts, and then coughs, shaking his head once. “Baka.”

Kakashi looks down between them, at the limp cock on Naruto’s stomach. “I managed to wear you out. Imagine that.”

Naruto smiles, beatifically, whispering. “For now.” He exhales, slowly raising his arms to embrace Kakashi. “That was cathartic.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “What was the cathartic thing about it for you?”

Naruto frowns, hesitating for a long second, before answering, voice rough. “Forgetting? And just feeling you.” His eyes find Kakashi’s, full of wonder. “I felt you.”

Kakashi nods, throat closed off. And I felt what you felt. Felt you. His voice is gruff. “I know. That was…”

Naruto smiles, widely, watching him. “We have to find a way to do that more often.”

Kakashi hums, nestling in. “Always chasing the new high is a slippery rope…”

Naruto chuckles, the sound rumbling beneath Kakashi’s ear. “To ecstasy?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, and then shakes his head, or at least as much as he can. “To destruction.” He lifts his head, to see Naruto frown. He clicks his tongue. “I don’t mean that we shouldn’t try other things, new things… just…” He shrugs.

Naruto quirks an eyebrow. “We can’t expect there to be a new high every day?”

Kakashi nods. “Exactly. There’ll be loooooots of normal orgasms, too.”

Naruto snickers.

 

Kakashi hums, nestling back in, pushing his nose into Naruto’s neck with a sigh. 

Naruto whispers, while lazily pulling Kakashi’s hair. “We’re gonna be stuck together again.”

Kakashi snorts, just softly. “Good thing that we’re in a bath this time, huh?”

Naruto giggles. 

 

And then tightens his arms, flares up, and the world tilts, and the drop into the warm water, pulling Kakashi under for a moment.

 

Sounds, muted, and the golden glow, that shines like the sun.

 

 

Peace, right there, in Naruto’s arms.

 

 

 

Naruto pulls him back up, smiling while gasping for air, radiating happiness, and then bends to kiss him.

Kakashi receives the kiss, with a sigh, reaching up to thread his fingers up and around Naruto’s head, lacing a crown.

He whispers against that smiling mouth. “I so have to pay extra for this bath.”

Naruto snickers.

 

 

 

The hair in Kakashi’s neck tickles.

 

 

He blinks, breaking the kiss, while Naruto blinks up, golden eyes focusing on something behind Kakashi.

 

 

The Anbu’s voice is vaguely apologetic. “Forgive me, Hokage-sama. But you said you wanted to be informed immediately when they’d come back, and…” 

Kakashi nods, curtly, hearing the Anbu swish away, while his heart suddenly hammers.

 

Naruto frowns, the toad sage’s eyes refocusing on him, while one hand drops down, to lay over Kakashi’s thundering heart. 

His voice is threaded through with confusion. “What is it?”

Kakashi swallows, feeling faint. “They’re back.”

Naruto frowns, deeply. Tilting his head, silently.

Kakashi licks his lips, exhaling a shuddering breath. “I can probably better show you.” He reaches up, to feather the tip of a finger along Naruto’s lashes. 

Whispering. “Turn off sage mode. Don’t… scan.”

Naruto blinks, and then hesitates, but does so, the now blue eyes huge.

Kakashi smiles, a bit wobbly, trying not to let his voice shake. “Surprise coming right up.”

Naruto swallows, watching him.

He quirks a somewhat shaky smile, picking Kakashi’s turmoil up just fine. “Should I be afraid?”

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head once. “Oh no.”

Naruto blinks again, voice surprisingly small. “Okay?”

Kakashi smiles at him, and then leans in to press a kiss to his lips, before pushing back, and clambering out of the basin. Holding out his hand for Naruto to take. “Come.”

 

Naruto exhales deeply, and then takes his hand, and follows him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi guesses that somewhere deep, deep down Naruto doesn’t need the sage mode for him, because they’re still out, in the middle of the street, when Naruto falls to his knees.

 

With a sound that burns itself into Kakashi’s memory, and Kakashi cannot help but smile, a gasping, hiccup smile, through tears, while he also sinks down, holding him.

 

Naruto shakes, like a leaf. 

 

And suddenly he’s there, grinning once more, like a fiend, the booming voice just the tiniest bit thinner, the form just a bit lanky, but with eyes radiating mischief once more, and words, writing themselves onto Kakashi’s soul. Knowing he means them both.

“Ah, finally. Now look at you, you’re beaming, you little imp?”

 

Kakashi snorts, and then raises his eyes to his, and then releases Naruto, to give him the tiniest shove.

Whispering, with a broken voice. 

 

 

 

“Surprise.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi rubs his smarting shoulder, and then receives the glass from Tsunade, who smirks at him. 

She indicates the bruise with a click of her tongue. “Want me to heal it?”

Kakashi shakes his head, with a snort. “No. I… I guess I deserved that punch.”

Tsunade grins. “I hadn’t expected you to keep it from him either.”

Kakashi shrugs, rolling his shoulder a bit. “I wanted to surprise him.”

Tsunade snorts. “Well, you managed.”

Kakashi exhales, shudderingly. 

 

He swallows, taking a sip, glad when the alcohol trails a path of fire down his throat, anchoring him. 

He nods at the door to the living room, where Naruto and Jiraiya have been talking, and laughing, and crying. “This is good.”

Tsunade exhales, and then nods, once, with her eyes closed. “Yes.”

Kakashi swallows, watching her. “How was it?”

Tsunade reopens her eyes, slowly, and then shrugs, once. “Hard.” She clicks her tongue, quietly. “He was laying aaaaaall the way down, in the bay, covered by sea grass. Even Suigetsu needed weeks to locate him.” She snorts. “I… Suigetsu wasn’t convinced we were not wasting our time, but I…” She frowns into her glass. 

Kakashi nods. “It’s just like him to find a way.”

Tsunade snorts. “Yes.” She inhales, and then shrugs, with a small smile. “When Suigetsu dragged him out the body barely resembled anything human. Without his regeneration already working I wouldn’t have made it.”

Kakashi hums. “He really had it active the whole time?”

Tsunade nods. “Yes. And while it healed him it also drained him. Catch 22.”

 

Kakashi raises his eyebrows. “And now, we’re here, once more.” He leans in a bit. “Does he know?”

Tsunade bites her lips, and then starts to grin, while also taking a sip of her drink. 

Kakashi blinks at her. Stating. “You haven’t told.”

Tsunade shrugs. “At first, he was too weak for news like that. And then…” She trails off.

Kakashi starts to grin, and then to snicker. “You’re as bad as I am.”

 

Jiraiya’s voice interrupts them, Naruto hard on his heels. “Oh she is, always has been, though she tried to hide it for the senseless uselessness of propriety.” He snickers, and then sobers. “What hasn’t she told me though?”

Tsunade glowers at him, opening her mind, but Naruto is faster, though his voice is… flat. “Oh, right.” Jiraiya turns a bit, to look at him. 

Naruto blinks, voice still flat but underlaid now with emotion. “You don’t know.”

Jiraiya narrows his eyes, just a bit. “What do I not know.”

Naruto’s eyes find Kakashi’s, his voice wobbly. “I… maybe I should show you?”

 

Kakashi swallows, and then grins, quipping lightly. “Jiraiya-san, you have my permission to hit Naruto’s shoulder, too.”

 

Naruto snorts, a sound that’s mixed with a snicker. 

He holds out his hand, grinning fiendishly when Jiraiya hesitates to take it.

Jiraiya looks back, at Kakashi. “Should I be afraid?”

 

Kakashi snorts, marveling at the similarities between those two. At the similar reactions. “No.”

Naruto mock-whines, weighing his head. “Maybe?”

Tsunade snorts.

 

Jiraiya blinks, the dark eyes wistful suddenly, sensing something, obviously. “I see.”

Kakashi exhales, and then puts his glass away, while turning to the door. 

Shaking his head, once. “Come.”

 

 

Naruto turns, dragging Jiraiya past Kakashi and out the door. 

Vibrating.

 

 

Kakashi follows, just the tiniest bit more sedately, but simply unable to stay away.

 

Unable not to witness that.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Naruto raises his fist, to knock, loudly, uncaringly of the late hour.

 

Kakashi watches, as if in slow motion, as the door opens.

 

 

He cannot breathe, watching as Minato’s eyes come up, slowly, breaking on the way.

Shattering, with a sudden influx of pain, and longing, and happiness, too pure to contain.

 

Watches, as Jiraiya sinks to his knees.

Starts to shake, Naruto the only thing holding him upright.

 

Minato drops down, too, whispering with a voice that is broken by a sob. “Sensei.”

 

 

 

And Kakashi smiles, beatifically.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

The air is cold still, fresh, the breeze ruffling Kakashi’s hair.

 

He draws his knees up, leaning back agains the wall, feeling the tiles of the roof shift just the tiniest bit. The sky is just lighting up, the day promising to be beautiful, and warm.

 

A whisper of cloth, and then Jiraiya settles next to him, with a grunt, stretching his legs out in front of him.

 

Kakashi swallows, eyes fixed on the sunrise. 

Jiraiya’s arm comes up, draws Kakashi into a half-embrace. The long, white, currently rather shaggy hair tickles Kakashi’s neck.

Jiraiya’s voice vibrates in the space between them, a low rumble. “I knew I’d find you here.”

Kakashi swallows again, trying to speak past the restriction in his throat. “Yeah, well, I felt Naruto should have the chance to comfort his Dad and Mom without me hovering there like a fifth wheel.”

Jiraiya chuckles. “You’re hardly in the way?”

Kakashi smiles softly. “Yeah, I know. Still. They deserved that time with you.” He shoots Jiraiya a look. “Besides, the fact that you’re here means they’ve fallen asleep. Which is no wonder with all those tears.”

Jiraiya hums. “Clever boy.”

Kakashi snorts.

Jiraiya’s hands squeezes his shoulder, just a bit. “How have you been, Kakashi.”

Kakashi swallows. “I…” He trails off, and then shakes his head. “Busy?”

Jiraiya snorts. “Mhh hmmm. And now try again.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, and then snorts, too. “I… it’s been hard. And good. We didn’t manage to prevent the war the…”, he hesitates, wondering how much Jiraiya actually knows. “That the Akatsuki wanted. Ultimately it was Obito, driving them along, in Madara’s name.” He looks up at Jiraiya, watches Jiraiya watch him. “That doesn’t surprise you.”

Jiraiya shrugs. “Nothing about it all made sense without the factor of time, and planning. I had heard rumors… Minato must have felt terrible, to realize it had been his pupil.”

Kakashi blinks. “I… right.” He averts his gaze, thoughts racing. Right. I hadn’t really thought much about the history Minato and Obito share, beyond that … incursion. He swallows. “Kushina dragged Obito away from a resurrected Madara, by his ear.”

Jiraiya laughs out, loudly, booming, and Kakashi cannot help but join in, chuckling. “Right?” He shakes his head. “Then I could only stare, but it really was quite hilarious.”

Jiraiya sobers slowly, dark eyes watching him intently. “When did the bond engage?”

Kakashi sniffs, dead serious again instantly. “There, on the battlefield.” He smiles a shaky smile. “He gave me new eyes. I opened them, and…” I saw him. And he saw me.

Jiraiya hums, and then reaches up to touch the pads of his fingers to Kakashi’s face. 

He quirks an eyebrow. “They’re not exactly normal ones either.”

Kakashi snorts, wondering at how he can know, but not doubting the verdict. “No. They’re copies of Obito’s sharingan. But I…”

Jiraiya smiles, the lines of his face seeming a bit deeper than in Kakashi’s memory. “You hesitate to reawaken them.”

Kakashi grimaces. “Sora said that there likely would be a way to do that with positive emotions, but I…”

 

He looks up when there is no response, seeing Jiraiya stare at him.

Kakashi frowns, rewinding his words, gasping when it clicks. “Oh. Right. Yes, Sora-san has come back to Konoha. For them. And… you.”

Jiraiya works his jaw for a moment, and then clicks his tongue, with a sniff. “My my, you have been busy.”

Kakashi snorts, giving him an eye-smile. 

Jiraiya’s hand comes up, to pull at a tuft of his hair for a moment, tone teasing. “And you’re as pretty as ever.”

Kakashi swallows, and blushes, and then playfully slaps the hand away. “And off the market.”

Jiraiya grins, leaning in. “Finally.”

Kakashi sighs, exhaling in a rush. “Oh yes.”

Jiraiya laughs, pulling him in to hug him tightly for a long moment. “That makes me so happy.” He grins, waggling his eyebrows. “So, is it as good as hoped for?”

Kakashi snorts, while he tries to contain his blush. “None of your business.”

Jiraiya snickers. “That’s a yes.” 

Kakashi snorts, and then chimes in, for a moment. “Yes.”

 

Jiraiya sobers slowly, and then releases Kakashi again, slowly, with a squeeze of his shoulder. “I thought of many things… there, but I never…” He trails off, shaking his head.

Kakashi swallows, watching him intently, the sun lighting them both up. “You were aware?”

Jiraiya weighs his head. “In a way. More like a semi-lucid dream.” He waves his hand. “It wasn’t oppressive or terrible, no worries.” He sighs, looking up into the sky for a moment. “It was dark, and peaceful, actually. It didn’t hurt either, just…” He shakes his head. “Sight went first, then direct sound. For a long while, I would only feel the shifting tides.” He shrugs. “Looking back, it must have been something like being in the womb, and now…”, he looks back at Kakashi, eyes twinkling, “… and now I am reborn.”

He sniffs, hands fidgeting for a moment. “And what a life to come back to. One where they are here, too.” He blinks, grinning at Kakashi, before he looks back to the sunrise. “Where we somehow managed to turn the tide, and win.”

 

Kakashi nods, and then grimaces, just a bit. “There’s the thing though… we know that there’ll be another battle, at some point.”

Jiraiya quirks his eyebrows. “Against?”

Kakashi exhales, and then snorts, with a shake of his head. “I… maybe it’s better if I take you along for tea tomorrow. I’m actually surprised she wasn’t there tonight, but… she probably was watching, via the threads of fate.”

Jiraiya tilts his head. “Who.”

Kakashi smiles, and then shakes his head again, picking at a fluff on his pants. “Kaguya.”

Jiraiya hums, watching him. “The fox goddess?”

Kakashi chuckles, and then sobers, slowly. “Yeah.”

Jiraiya frowns. “Why does the fox goddess want to fight us?”

Kakashi raises his eyebrows. “Oh, not her, just her…” Friends. “Her kin. They… harvest us.”

Jiraiya blinks, and then cracks his knuckles. 

Grinning dangerously. “Training time!”

Kakashi snorts, and then sobers, nodding. “Yes.” He shoots Jiraiya a look. “Want to take him for training once more?”

Jiraiya tilts his head, watching him, like a shark. “Can I?”

Kakashi shrugs, deliberately light. “Oh, I’ll just… come by in the evening, and go back in the morning, you know?”

Jiraiya snorts. “I know.” He lifts his head to the sky, and nods, once. “It feels… right that I’m back here, Hatake Kakashi. Fated.”

Kakashi frowns, deeply, and then nods. “It does.”

 

There is a small pause, and Kakashi clicks his tongue eventually, leaning in a bit. “It’s something else to see them though, isn’t it.”

Jiraiya leans in a bit, too, tone utterly dry. “They’re so young??”

Kakashi snorts, and then giggles. “Naruto has been taking to them so well, but even he is weirded out at times.”

Jiraiya snorts, too, and then nods. “I can imagine.” His sly eyes find Kakashi’s. “How was seeing him for you?”

Kakashi swallows, and then shrugs, deciding to be blunt. “Mind blowing. And, imagine, I got a kiss, sanctioned by Kushina.”

Jiraiya giggles, shaking his head. “Oh, the little imp.”

Kakashi shoots him a sideways look, mightily amused. “Before, I would have never attributed that with Minato…”

Jiraiya hums, nodding. “But now you understand.”

Kakashi grins, helplessly. “Well, we know where Naruto has it from.”

Jiraiya waggles his eyebrows. 

Kakashi hides his snort behind his hands.

 

Jiraiya hums, grunting, when he crosses his legs at the ankles. “So. Do I have a grave?”

Kakashi nods, lowering his hands again. “Oh yes. Or, better, a memorial. It’s up where Naruto convinced Nagato to stop the attack.”

There is a pause, and Kakashi looks up, and then sighs. Oh, right. “Nagato was the one who came to destroy Konoha while Naruto was training… He used the final resurrection jutsu of the rinnegan after Naruto convinced him.” He smirks, watching Jiraiya’s profile closely. “I found the frog suits.”

Jiraiya snorts, and then reaches up to wipe his eyes, with a sniff. “Oh god, yeah. They loved them.”

Kakashi’s smirk gentles, remembering the faded photograph. “I found the photo, too.” He sobers slowly, letting his sincerity color his voice. “I’m sorry they’re gone.”

Jiraiya sniffs, and then nods, with a sigh. “I knew that it had to be Nagato… I’m glad the message  reached you.” Jiraiya tilts his head, watches Kakashi closely. “Tsunade said you died.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Oh, she kept all the big infos from you but told you that?”

Jiraiya snickers. “She said you had to die for her to be able to push the hat at you.”

Kakashi grunts. And then sighs, deeply. “True, I guess. Supposedly I was sent back for something I had to do still.” He shrugs. “I guess that can be applied to anything.”

Jiraiya hums. “You brought winds of change.”

Kakashi lifts his finger, waggles it. “Nuh uh, that is Naruto.”

Jiraiya grins, shaking his head. “He may be the wind, but you’re the energy behind it, powering it up. Making it thunder.” Kakashi blinks, and Jiraiya frowns. “What?”

Kakashi shakes his head once. “It’s just that Naruto likened us to thunder, too, and I…” likened the bond to thunder in the distance. He swallows. “Sasuke powered him up just as much.”

Jiraiya hums. “But you can give it direction.”

Kakashi blinks, with a frown. 

Jiraiya inclines his head, leaning forward a bit, to catch his gaze. “I heard of Guren. And you successfully applying crystal manipulation style to light particles.” He leans back, with a grunt. “Not bad, Kakashi, not bad.”

Kakashi ducks his head, just a bit embarrassed. “Yeah, well.”

 

They are silent for a moment, the sounds of the awakening Konoha enveloping them.

 

Eventually, Kakashi speaks up again. “I met the founders, during the war.”

Jiraiya snorts, fidgeting a bit. “I see.” He hesitates, and then shoots Kakashi a look. “And?”

Kakashi smirks gently, and then leans into Jiraiya, for a moment. “Tobirama-sama would have loved to see you… but he decided to follow Hashirama and Madara when they released. Stating that someone had to keep an eye on them.”

Jiraiya cackles, reaching up to wipe at his eyes. “I see.”

Kakashi smiles, gently, and then lets some of the anger he still feels color his voice. “Hiruzen was there as well. He voluntarily released, too, when Kushina turned to him.”

Jiraiya laughs out, definitely meanly. “Oh, I would have loved to see that.”

Kakashi smiles, grimly. “I only realized much later that he actually tried to protect Naruto by not giving him to Uchiha Mikoto, but…”

Jiraiya nods, with a deep inhale. “Ah, you have no idea how I argued.” He shakes his head, once. “But he wouldn’t hear it.” He frowns, and then shoots Kakashi a look. “But the universe drew parallels for you and Naruto… you do realize that, don’t you.”

Kakashi grimaces, a bit bitterly. “I guess… I’m just grateful he gets the time now.”

 

There is another small pause, and then Jiraiya speaks up again, with a sidelong glance. “Is it true that Orochimaru is here, out and about, too?”

Kakashi snorts. “Yep. That…” He shakes his head. “Honestly, that is so weird. Given history. But he made the very valid point that we… cannot kill him. We do not have the skills. He’d just…” He gesticulates, and then shrugs. “So we struck a deal.”

Jiraiya nods, slowly. “I want to meet up with him. Eventually.”

Kakashi shakes his head, once, and then shrugs. “Please take Tsunade with you until you’re all healed once more. I don’t think he would do something, but…”

Jiraiya hums, finishing the sentence. “But you never know.”

Kakashi nods.

 

Jiraiya stretches his arms over his head, grunting when the joints pop. “Getting old sucks.”

Kakashi snorts, waggling his eyebrows. “But we’re some of the lucky ones.”

Jiraiya snorts. “Tell that to my bones.” He lowers his arms, with a sigh, and then sends Kakashi a sidelong glance. “Breakfast?”

Kakashi smirks at him, knowing Jiraiya can see it all, despite the mask. “You just want to strut through Konoha and suck up the attention and amazement…”

Jiraiya giggles. “Yes. That. Good energy, that.” His eyes sparkle. “But I also really, really want a coffee.” He leans in, whispering. “Tsunade only had tea with her. Which is fine and all, but I had coffee when I was in Amegakure and I really want some now.”

Kakashi chuckles, and then pushes up, extending his hand. “Naruto likes his best from a little cafe over on the other side of the market district.”

Jiraiya takes the hand, pulls himself up with a grunt. “Then, by all means, lets go?”

Kakashi nods, and then looks down at their joint hands for a moment. 

He shakes his head, once, tone brittle. “Yes.” He hesitates, and then whispers. “I’m glad you’re back.”

 

Jiraiya draws him in, squishes him against the still broad chest, gently clapping Kakashi’s back. “So am I, my friend, so am I.”

 

 

 

 

Chapter 58: Seize the day

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

“So, I hear you’ve started training with Jiraiya again?”

 

Naruto grins, reaching for another grape and feeding it to Kakashi, bending down to kiss him, for just a moment, before answering. “Yes, he wanted to train, get back in shape, and has asked me to make the time.” Naruto shrugs. “I told him I’d love to while I’m here?”

Kakashi hums, chewing on the grape, the tart taste exploding in his mouth. 

He swallows, licking his lips for a moment. “Kurama’s not jealous anymore?”

Naruto laughs out, and then shakes his head, placing his free palm onto his stomach for just a moment. “Noooo, that’s long past. He just… vibes with it now. And he actually really likes Jiraiya.”

Kakashi grins softly. “I bet.” He sobers slowly, watching Naruto watch him. “I… could I talk to Kurama directly? At some point?”

Naruto blinks, and then leans back a bit, with a small frown. “Sure. Why?”

Kakashi weighs his head, reaching up to ghost a finger over Naruto’s lower lip. “Something your Mom said.”

Naruto presses a kiss onto the finger, with a shrug. “Okay?” His eyes grow vacant for a split second, and then he shrugs again. “Kurama says he could manifest now?”

Kakashi blinks, looking down at himself, at his rather unclad state. Almost unclad state. “Errrr…”

Naruto grins, with the tip of his tongue between his teeth. “Nothing he hasn’t seen before?”

Kakashi glowers at him, but sighs, dramatically, with a shrug. “Fiiiinnnnneeee.”

 

Naruto giggles, and then pushes up, and Kakashi misses him, immediately, the jab of almost pain vaguely frightening. He swallows the urge to pull Naruto back down, and exhales, watching the seal on Naruto’s stomach flare up. 

Red chakra begins to pour out, drip to the floor.

Kakashi hums, and then grins. “You’re leaking, honey.”

Naruto snorts, lightly swatting him. 

The chakra condenses, and then solidifies, twisting into shape like a cloud, and a dream. A small dream.

“ROKUDAIME.” 

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, in a perfunctory bow. “Kurama. It is my honor that you honor my request.”

Kurama snorts, stretching like a cat, the red eyes finding Naruto’s for a moment. “At least the air is breathable right now.”

Kakashi clears his throat, feeling beet red, hearing Naruto giggle.

He shrugs. “Yeah, well, I mean…”

Kurama grins, flews drawn up. “I’VE REALLY ENJOYED YOUR RELATIONSHIP SO FAR. IT’S A GOOD ONE.”

Kakashi grimaces, just a bit, willing his blush to go away. “Yeah well.” He clears his throat again. “Thank you for all the… help.”

Kurama grins even broader, tails swishing through the air. “MY PLEASURE.”

Naruto bends down, to scratch him between the ears. 

His voice is openly teasing. “Of course it helps that you get the endorphin rush, too…”

Kakashi blinks, looking up at Naruto. “He does?”

Naruto shrugs. “I… guess I could keep it from him? But he’s been giving me all this energy, so… fair’s fair I guess?”

Kakashi blinks, absolutely refusing to think about giving the fox sexual pleasure while… 

He clears his throat, again, his voice a bit pressed. “Well, that’s good then.”

Kurama snickers.

Kakashi glowers at him, too.

 

Naruto bends down, and presses a kiss to his lips, voice a whisper. “You have no idea how happy it makes me that you get along.”

Kakashi reaches up, draws the back of his fingers along Naruto’s cheek. 

He shrugs, tone wistful. “He’s always been a part of the package. Given history it wasn’t always easy to accept, but…” He hesitates, looking past Naruto at Kurama, who is watching, with dark eyes. “But the two of you are perfect together. A perfect blend.” He swallows, speaking past the constriction in his throat. “Knowing you are… pretty safe despite being in danger so often is…”

Naruto smiles at him, a bit wobbly. He nods, silently.

 

Kakashi nods, too, and then addresses Kurama, with a small grin. “Actually, that is what I wanted to talk to you about. I… Kushina said that something happened, with Pain.”

Kurama’s red eyes find his, hold. “YOU MEAN WHILE PAIN HAPPENED.”

Kakashi nods, silently. 

Kurama huffs. “HASHIRAMA’S NECKLACE BROKE.”

Naruto blinks, his head turning to watch the fox. 

Kurama looks at him. “THE INFLUX OF HIS CELLS SHOCKED ME.”

Kakashi frowns. “It shocked you?”

Kurama nods, settling down a bit, head on his front paws. “HASHIRAMA WAS THE ONE TO CAPTURE ME. I AM INTIMATELY FAMILIAR WITH HIS CELLS.”

Kakashi blinks, shooting a look at Naruto, who is watching Kurama.

He clicks his tongue. “But that was before you were transforming further, right… I mean, the theory is that Naruto was able to suppress you later through their help, but…”

Kurama snorts, eyes glowing. “NARUTO WAS ABLE TO SUPPRESS ME THROUGH MINATO’S HELP THROUGH THE SEAL.” He hesitates, just a bit, and then huffs. “HASHIRAMA’S CELLS SHOCKED ME BECAUSE THEY FUSED WITH MINE.” Kurama swivels his eyes around, to look at Naruto. “AND HIS.”

Kakashi swallows, watching them. “So… it is true then.”

Kurama scoffs. “I GUESS.” He sobers a bit, with an obvious grimace. “WE’VE BEEN DIFFERENT, AFTER.”

Kakashi blinks, trying to understand. “Different? How.”

Naruto shrugs, reaching out to pet Kurama, carefully, gently, keeping his eyes on the fox. His voice is carefully neutral. “The prison happened shortly after. The conference. The island. All the while Kurama was pretty quiet, but the influx of his power…”

Kurama growls. “IT LEAKED.”

Kakashi frowns. “It leaked?”

Naruto shrugs, with a sigh. “B showed me how to defeat my bijou, but it was actually… quite easy.”

Kakashi blinks.

Kurama huffs.

Naruto shrugs again. “I knew what he would do. It was an effort of course…” He leans in, grinning, scratching Kurama vigorously. “But I knew I would be able to.” Naruto bites his lips, tone wistful. “I looked into Kurama’s eye, in that place, and I knew.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, shakes his head. “I don’t understand. What do you mean by leaking…”

Naruto sighs. “I don’t know how to put it. The walls of that space changed. Kurama’s powers got even more tightly connected to mine. I mean, I wouldn’t have been able to survive that prison stunt otherwise.” 

Kakashi jerks, as if slapped.

Naruto’s head comes up, watches him for a moment, and then sighs. “I don’t blame you, not anymore.” He clicks his tongue. “Ero-sennin and I talked the other day. He told me none too subtly that I would have to make shit decisions, too.” Naruto works his jaw for a moment, with a snort. “Quite sobering, actually. I mean, I know that, theoretically, but…”

Kakashi swallows, drawing a shaky hand over his face. 

Kurama stretches again, like a cat. “A PART OF MY POWER IS ALWAYS REGENERATING HIS CELLS NOW. A SMALL PART. BUT THAT PART IS NOT DEPLETING US.” He hesitates, weighing his head. “LIKE A BLOSSOM, UNFOLDING ETERNALLY.”

Kakashi blinks, and then exhales, in a rush. “So…” Kushina and Minato are correct? “Where does that leave us?”

Kurama’s eyes twinkle, slyly. “YOU TELL ME.” He settles, onto his side, tails lowered.

Kakashi watches him, for a long moment. “Are you aware of what they found?”

 

Naruto frowns, but Kakashi ignores him, watching Kurama.

Kurama hits his tails onto the floor, once. “I KNEW WHAT THEY WERE LOOKING FOR, YES, BECAUSE MITO HAD TALKED TO HASHIRAMA ABOUT IT. I WASN’T AWARE THAT THEY FOUND IT.”

Naruto narrows his eyes. “What did they find?”

Kakashi exhales through his nose, and then shrugs. “A special hiraishin kunai. Enhanced with seals that allow the wielder to… change the pathways of another being.”

Kurama weighs his head. “OR THEIR OWN.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Right.”

Naruto hums, watching him intently. “What could you do with it?”

Kurama yawns. “CUT ME OUT OF YOU, FOR EXAMPLE.”

Kakashi blinks, staring at Kurama nonplussed, while Naruto’s head whips around.

His voice seems to be thundering. “What?”

Kakashi lifts his head and hand, trying to assuage, while still staring at Kurama. “That… is nothing that has even been considered.” He tilts his head, eyes locked to Kurama’s red ones. But you considered that. And you let them search for it nonetheless. He clicks his tongue. “They were looking for it for something different.”

Naruto’s voice is heated. “Yeah? What.”

Kurama grins at him, a decidedly not-funny grin. “YOUR FATHER THINKS WE COULD REACH WHAT MITO CALLED BARYON MODE.”

 

There is a pause.

 

Kakashi blinks, slowly. “How… do you know?”

Kurama’s red eyes return to his, for a moment. “OH PLEASE. I KNOW HIS MOTHER, INTIMATELY, AND I HAVE WITNESSED THEM TALKING. I KNOW NAMIKAZE MINATO.”

Naruto stares at him, fidgeting.

Kakashi grimaces. “You’re not… happy with that plan.”

Kurama harrumphs. “ANYTHING THAT PERTAINS TO NARUTO WILL PERTAIN TO ME NOW, TOO.” He rolls his eyes. “OF COURSE I’M NOT HAPPY.” He hesitates, and then huffs. “BUT I AM INTRIGUED.”

Kakashi holds up his hand, vaguely irritated by the fact that Naruto is still silent, just staring. “Wait. You’re not happy, but… looking forward to it?”

Kurama rolls his eyes again, and Kakashi has the distinct impression he is embarrassed, just a bit. “WELL, WHAT MITO CALLED BARYON IS THE HIGHEST FORM OF SYMBIOSIS. OF CONNECTION. OF POWER. I…” He trails off, and then draws up his flews, with a shrug, tails swishing. “I’M INTRIGUED.”

Kakashi blinks. “You want it.”

Kurama averts his gaze, tails twitching. 

The voice is acerbic. “AND IF YES, SO?”

 

Kakashi exhales, and turns his gaze to Naruto.

Who stares at him, with an expression that promises… hurt.

 

Kakashi clicks his tongue, tries to keep his tone light. “You’re not amused by this, darling?”

Naruto hisses. “Oh you’ve got to be kidding me. You want to change me? Change my pathways? My cells? Am I not powerful enough? Have I not worked hard enough?” He leans in, volume of his voice rising with every word. “Am I not enough for you?”

Kakashi shivers, falling to the side to crawl up to him, shuffling by Kurama. Ignores the underlying accusation, hearing the hurt behind the words. The hurt that has nothing to do with the idea itself. Why does this hurt you though?

His hands come up, to frame Naruto’s face, vaguely glad when he lets him. 

He hesitates, licking his lips, trying to find the right words. “Naruto, I…” That wasn’t my idea. 

He swallows the instinctual need to deflect down, knowing that a part of the responsibility will rest on his shoulders, no matter whose idea it was.

He sighs. “I want…” He trails off again, shaking his head once. Tries again. “I need you to be safe. But… I must keep this village safe. I must consider possibilities.” He grimaces, his thumbs stroking, Naruto’s furious, burning blue eyes on his. 

Kakashi lowers his voice. “If it is true, that you are constantly regenerating” like they are “… you could carry a potential that would match theirs.” I think. “If it is true what Kurama says, that your cells have merged with Hashirama’s… you carry a chakra nature combination that has never before existed.” He swallows, eyes imploring on Naruto’s. “Your Dad said there were wooden splinters in your wind shuriken.”

Naruto’s eyes flicker away.

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a moment. Stating. “You know.”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “I’m not stupid.”

Kakashi grins, for just a moment. “No, you’re not.”

He gently tilts Naruto’s head, until the blue eyes finds his again, the gaze in them sullen now. 

 

Kakashi clicks his tongue, watching him. “And this isn’t really about the idea, is it.” And usually you’re all in for more power. More skills.

Naruto rolls his eyes. Presses the word out. “No.” He swallows, and then sniffs. “I mean…”

Kakashi hums, leaning in to press his forehead to his. “What is it.” 

Naruto’s voice comes haltingly, slowly, broken. “What if… what if this… whatever Dad actually wants to do with that stupid knife… what if… it changes the way I… “, Naruto’s eyes come up, find Kakashi’s on short distance, wide and bleeding pain, “feel?”

Kakashi stares at him, nonplussed.

 

It’s Kurama who speaks up, voice firm. “THAT WON’T  HAPPEN, BAKA.”

Naruto shivers under Kakashi’s hands. Whispering. “How do you know?”

Kurama snorts, undulating and flopping down on his side. “BECAUSE YOU’VE LOVED HIM EVER SINCE HE BRUSHED YOUR HAIR.”

Kakashi shivers, and then sniffs. Oh, darling.

Naruto’s face crumbles, his hands in Kakashi’s neck now, threading up in his hair. 

 

 

Kakashi tilts his head, kisses him, with the purity of the sun’s bright light, and the star’s twinkle. 

Salt prickles on his tongue. 

 

 

Naruto breaks the kiss, with a gasp, and a sob. “I cannot risk this, this feeling, I need it, I cannot…”

Kakashi shivers, drawing him into an embrace that’s way too tight, but necessary. “Shhhhhhh, I know.”

Naruto’s voice carries a laugh that borders on desperation. “I don’t know how others can possibly stand the bond breaking. I cannot even think about it, I cannot…” He trails off, with a sniff. 

Kakashi pushes his nose to his neck, breathes.

Kurama’s voice comes, tone gentle. “I CANNOT FORETELL THE FUTURE… BUT THIS WON’T BREAK THE BOND.”

Naruto sniffs, breath hot in Kakashi’s neck. “Oh yeah? How can you be so sure about that?”

Kurama cackles. “BECAUSE I’M PART OF THIS. AND I WON’T LET IT.”

Kakashi blinks, and then tilts his head, to look over Naruto’s shoulder and at Kurama.

Kurama huffs. “WHAT CAN I SAY. I LIKE YOU.”

 

Kakashi nods, once, and then turns his head again, nestles back into the embrace, into the smell.

With a shiver. And a grin. Knowing Kurama can hear him, just fine.

 

Yeah. I like you, too.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi watches Naruto sleep, later, when Kurama has gone again. 

 

When the matter of him had liquified, gasified, drifted back into that space in Naruto that is beyond the physical. 

 

When Kakashi had found himself missing the fox, just a bit.

 

He knows his pack really likes Kurama.

Pakkun especially seems to have taken a liking to the fox, who is matching his deadpan humor, to Naruto’s - and Obito’s - unending delight. And Iruka’s amused consternation.

He snorts, lightly, softly, quietly, reflecting on that dynamic a bit. 

 

He knows from reports that Obito has apparently taken it upon himself to visit the teams of the academy, regularly, apart from his other duties. Duties that keep him locked in a lot of meetings.

Kakashi has the suspicion that a big part of the motivation is to get out and running, but he also knows that… Obito likes the friction. With people who can take it.

 

He licks his lips, remembering that moment when the Mangekyo had twisted into existence the last time with a shiver down his spine.

 

He wonders at that now, at that statement that Obito had made, that ‘Naruto would not be able to do anything if Obito decided to take Kakashi away’.

 

Something on your mind, hmm.

 

But I wonder if it is really true. If Naruto could actually not do anything about it.

 

 

And I know you wonder that, too.

 

 

 

He remembers seeing him and Iruka kiss, at the wedding party.

Their dark eyes had been like coals, watching him go outside.

 

Knowing what would happen.

 

Having prepared for it, with Naruto.

 

 

 

Naruto sighs in his sleep, and Kakashi shifts, propped up on one elbow, more or less comfortably propped up next and over him, one leg in between his, hand over the hidden seal on Naruto’s stomach.

He smirks, watching an answering smile twitch on that mobile face, deep in dreams now, the eyes moving rapidly back and forth. 

Remembers burning blue, watching him go, too.

 

You and Obito, so similar in your drives, in your convictions. Two faces of the same coin. He, literally split in half, carrying what is left of Hashirama’s cultivated cells… and you, made a vessel, just after birth, carrying the bijous… that Hashirama collected.

 

His hand comes up, to glide lightly over skin, careful not to tickle, mapping out the chest and the flanks, and then gliding along the collarbones, resisting the urge to press a kiss to the dip between them. He marvels at the knowledge that is his now, for a moment, won in the last weeks.

 

The knowledge that Naruto loves skin-to-skin contact while sleeping.

That he won’t wake from Kakashi’s touch, not if they are without … intent.

That he will echo a reaching, even while dreaming.

 

Naruto is ticklish, on his flanks. And in the back of his knees. There’s a spot close to his elbow that will make him squirm and howl, trying to scramble away. 

The spot behind his ear, just a bit down his throat will arouse him, unfailingly. 

Kakashi grins, admitting to himself that it doesn’t take much to arouse Naruto anyways.

Still. 

 

He hums, eyes following his fingers glide along gold-dusted skin in the moon’s half-light, drift over the vein that runs down Naruto’s arm. The muscles are relaxed now, heavy, but it’s there, pulsing sedately. Kakashi exhales, looking up to the throat, watching the pulse there, for long moments, a hypnotic rhythm under soft skin.

Skin that he has tasted, on his tongue, for so often now.

Skin he hungers for, always.

 

He swallows, resisting the urge to taste it now.

 

Iruka has been by, the other day. 

Telling him that Obito is in pain, sometimes.

That, while the flesh is stable… it hurts.

 

Kaguya said it has to do with the lignification of Hashirama’s cells. 

It’s a gradual thing, apparently.

 

Kakashi swallows, watching the smooth skin under his hand for a long moment, the way it shifts, just slightly, with every breath.

 

I wonder if it is Kurama’s influence that keeps the… flower unfolding. From blooming and gradually entering its own lignification process. 

I wonder if you know, somewhere, deep down.

 

I bet Kurama does.

 

 

Naruto sighs, shifting just a bit, towards him.

His head falls towards Kakashi, and Kakashi smirks, softly, hand coming up to push a random strand of hair out of Naruto’s face. The hair is just a bit longer again, almost shaggy, and Kakashi knows Naruto will likely cut it off again, soon.

 

Because apparently Naruto looks like 16 again, with his hair a bit longer.

And has been bitching about that, at length.

 

He smiles, a bit bittersweet, letting the golden strands slip through his fingers, remembering other times, when this hair had been in his hands.

Under his hands.

 

Naruto mumbles something in his sleep, and shifts again, burrowing in even closer, breath tickling Kakashi’s skin now. Puffing against his chest.

 

Pushing the thoughts away, and the worries.

With every breath you take.

 

He grins, and then shakes his head, and settles down, carefully shifting with slow movements, until he’s nestled Naruto in his embrace, the body in his arms a furnace, making any idea of a blanket superfluous. 

 

Warmth spreads, from everywhere they touch, like being touched by sunlight on a warm day.

 

Kakashi pushes his nose into gold, and breathes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

He wakes, to a myriad of feather-light kisses, showered onto his face.

 

It’s ridiculous, really, how happy that makes him feel. 

Stupid.

 

Fucking blissed out.

 

 

 

He knows his grin is goofy, Naruto giggling when he kisses him.

 

Naruto hums into the kiss, breaking it to press another kiss to the tip of his nose, laughter in his voice. “Good morning sunshine, wakey-wakey, Ero-Sennin will be here soon, remember?”

Kakashi grunts, licking his lips, tasting the vague peppermint taste of Naruto’s toothpaste. “I remember.” He pokes Naruto into the side, finding that ticklish spot for just an instant, making Naruto squirm and swat his hand, with a laughed curse. “Am awake.”

Naruto snorts. “Mhhh hmmm. I’ve been kissing you for at least 5 minutes.”

Kakashi hums, raising his eyebrows over still closed eyes. “Oops.”

Naruto leans in again, to nip at his lips. “I see.” A shiver of regret steals into his voice. “Too bad we don’t have the time now, I know just the thing to wake you…”

Kakashi snorts, slowly blinking his eyes open. “Yeah, and after that initial surge of energy I’d be totally done for the next two hours again.”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “Pffft. You only have a meeting with the daimyo. He’ll talk for at least two hours, you know that.”

Kakashi grimaces, and then pushes up to sit, slowly. “One more reason not to be totally spent.”

Naruto pouts.

 

And then almost squeals, shuffling over to the door, when the knock comes.

 

Kakashi looks down at his rather unclad state, being only in boxers, in vague consternation.

 

 

Naruto opens the door with a flourish, revealing Jiraiya with three cups of coffee.

Naruto sighs, deeply. “Ohhhhh, yessss.”

He takes one from Jiraiya, and then steps back, to let him in, the big Sannin entering the room slowly, closing the door behind him quietly. 

With a chuckle. “So that is the famed room.”

Kakashi freezes, half stuck in his shirt, while pulling it on. “Famed???”

Jiraiya settles in a chair int he corner with a sigh, taking a sip. “Well, a lot of bets run on this room, yes.”

Kakashi pulls the shirt down, sending him a dark look. “Bets…?”

Naruto snorts. “Oh yeah, I heard of that. Apparently people are betting on which days we do not engage privacy seals.”

Kakashi stares at him, and then shakes his head with a grimace. “The fuck?”

Jiraiya snickers. Holding out the cup for him to take, eyes twinkling.

 

Kakashi takes it, just a bit sullenly.

Jiraiya clicks his tongue, tone mightily amused. “I believe that may be the underlying reason.”

Kakashi shoots him a skunk-eye, and then takes a sip, sighing with the taste.

Naruto hums. “See. The coffee there is the best.” He grins, and then flops down next to Kakashi, knees touching. Kakashi doesn’t have to look up to know Jiraiya is grinning. 

 

He clears his throat. “So. Feeling comfortable in Konoha once more?”

Jiraiya blinks, and then winks. “Oh yes.” He points a finger. “But you’re not getting out of discussing…”, he turns, and reaches over, to pick up the Naruto plush from a corner, “… this with me.”

Naruto cackles. 

Kakashi points his cup, refusing to be embarrassed. “Not much to say. Naruto thought it funny to give me something to cuddle with while… we were still waiting.”

Jiraiya hums, turning the plush in his hand, still grinning. “I see.” He carefully puts the plush away, sharing a long, surprisingly sober look with Naruto, before sighing.

He clasps his hands around the cup. “So. I was thinking.”

Kakashi grins at him. “Uh oh.”

Naruto snorts, coughing around a sip he just took.

Jiraiya nods, dead-pan, with a click of his tongue. “Mhhh hmmm.” He grins for a moments nd then sobers again. “Still. I was thinking about training.”

Naruto shifts a bit, sitting up straighter.

Jiraiya leans forward, focusing on him. “You are a better sage than I ever was, Naruto. But there are jutsus I can do, that you have not even touched. Some of them might be very useful at some point. Like Toad Mouth Bind, for example. Or the Kaeru Kaeru no Jutsu, which might be useful for interrogation later.”

Naruto perks up. “Can you show me how to turn into a toad?”

Jiraiya snorts. “No. But the elders might.” His dark eyes find Kakashi’s for a long moment. “I need to recuperate still, you need to learn. Kakashi needs to train with you.”

Kakashi frowns, tilting his head. “You want me to come with?”

Naruto looks at him, and Kakashi holds up his hand, shaking his head. “Don’t get me wrong, I’d be there every night anyways…”, he grins softly, reaching up to trace a golden brow, “I wouldn’t be able to stay away…” His gaze returns to Jiraiya’s. “But you actively want me to train there?”

Jiraiya nods. “Yes. Besides.” His eyes find Naruto’s. “You’d be terribly distracted otherwise anyways.”

Kakashi clears his throat, vaguely embarrassed. “Letting him do his work is something I have to do anyways?”

Jiraiya laughs out, and then leans over, to lightly swat Kakashi’s shoulder. “Not you.” He points his thumb. “Him!”

Naruto snickers, ducking his head.

 

Kakashi feels warm, so warm.

 

There is a small pause, Jiraiya watching Naruto for a long moment.

When he speaks again, his voice is calm, but carrying heavy teasing. “So tell me, Naruto, how is it? Comparable with what you… lost your virginity with?”

Kakashi’s mouth drops open, but Naruto just laughs out, sparkling and light, ending in a snicker.

He rubs his nose. “Weeeeelllll, I can tell you that someone else is still very different to kage bunshin.”

Jiraiya cackles. “Told you.” He shoots Kakashi a quick look, winks, and then clicks his tongue. “Have you told him?”

Naruto blushes, just a bit, dimples appearing in his cheeks as he obviously tries to curb the mirth - and embarrassment. “Told?”

Jiraiya opens his mouth, but Kakashi is faster, interjecting, gently, knowing suddenly, trying to keep the mirth from his voice. “Well, I once asked you who you likened them to, remember?”

Naruto’s blush deepens, but he is grinning still, the burning blue eyes on Kakashi now, letting him see. 

He shrugs, just a bit sheepishly. “Well, I couldn’t resist?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, drawn in by the way the nose scrunches. “Oh?”

Naruto hums, tilting his head just a bit, suddenly very close. “Mhhh hmmmm. The real thing is better though.”

Kakashi hums, too, tilting his head further…

 

…and finds himself with his lips pressed against a plush, hastily shoved between him and Naruto.

 

He turns to Jiraiya, vaguely peeved, seeing a similar expression on Jiraiya’s face. “What??”

Jiraiya grins, but lightly swats him with the plush. “You have a meeting in a few minutes. Remember?”

Kakashi opens his mouth, and then closes it again, with a sigh. “Right.”

Naruto groans, heartfelt. And flops back down onto the bed, the very image of sullen pitifulness, though Kakashi notes he takes extra care not to spill his coffee.

Jiraiya clicks his tongue, tone dripping with amusement. “Kakashi, you’re obviously not wearing him out. Shame on you.”

Kakashi reaches blindly for a pillow, throws it. 

He points his cup, unable to keep the grin off his face. “You should be happy we aired the room.”

Jiraiya leans in, puts the pillow back, mock serious. “Oh, believe me, I am.”

Naruto giggles. And then sits up again, to take a sip of his coffee.

Kakashi tries not to look at the rippling muscles.

 

Jiraiya clicks his tongue, tone as dry as the desert. “Oh well. I’ll keep them busy for a while.” He pushes up, waggles his finger at them. “Don’t take too long.”

Kakashi opens his mouth, to deny, but Naruto is faster, suddenly plastered to his side, hand playing with the hair in Kakashi’s neck. 

Tone decidedly chipper, while he leans in to nuzzle at Kakashi’s neck. “Okay.”

Kakashi blinks, watching the door close, and Naruto grins at him, and then kisses him, deeply, a kiss that’s full of sunshine and coffee, and giggles, and acceptance.

 

Of love, so pure it hurts.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Making him very late for his meeting.

 

But he cannot find it within himself to care.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“And you will be welcome in Kirigakure, as the Mizukage has assured me. Just…” Kakashi trails off, with a small shrug, knowing Suigetsu understands.

Suigetsu grins, one tooth sticking out for a moment. “Yeah, I get it.” He inclines his head, just a bit, playfully. “Thank you, Rokudaime.”

Kakashi nods, leaning back on his desk, crossing his arms. “What do you plan to do now? Return there immediately?”

Suigetsu weighs his head. “I’m not sure. I still wish to visit Uzushiogakure at some point, but to be frank I have had enough diving around sunken structures for a while… I think I’ll visit Karin for a while and then…” He shrugs.

Kakashi hums, with a small frown. “There were sunken structures in Amegakure?”

Suigetsu snorts. “Lots of them. Very deep. The city seemed to be built on them.”

Kakashi blinks. “They’re still stable enough to bear it?”

Suigetsu weighs his head, tone uncaring. “Apparently. Some still glow.”

Kakashi purses his lips, watches him for a moment, watches Suigetsu twirl the scroll with his pardon in his hands, utterly focused on that. “I see.” What exactly is Amegakure built on? And is that the reason…

Suigetsu interrupts his thoughts. “May I go?”

Kakashi lifts his eyebrows, nods. “Of course. Thank you for your help. Your… skills have carried immeasurable worth for us.”

Suigetsu holds up the scroll, while stepping towards the door. “I would never have gotten this by myself. So…” He shrugs, grins, and is gone, and Kakashi snorts, shaking his head once.

 

Stares out of the window for a moment, remembering paper angel wings, fluttering in the upwind of big vents, and the ever present rain.

 

He taps his finger on his arm, and then pushes up, and signals for an Anbu.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“You really want to cover for me?”

 

Tsunade leans back, sipping on her tea, crossing her ankles with her feet up on the small table. “Ahhh, the least I can do. I know you didn’t take any vacation or time off since you took the hat?”

Kakashi shrugs, clicking his tongue. “But I did take regular time off?”

Tsunade snickers. “Being with Naruto doesn’t count.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “I’d be with him there, too?”

Tsunade hums. “You know what I mean.” She sobers a bit, watching him. “What is it?”

Kakashi looks up to her, from behind his desk. “Hmmm?”

Tsunade tilts her head. “Something is on your mind.”

Kakashi sends her a grinned eye-smile, and then leans back, with a sigh. “I see nothing gets past you still…”

She frowns. “Is it something with Naruto?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No. All good there.” He blushes a bit, sharing a quick grin, and then pushes on, not wanting to dive too deep into that right now. “No, it’s something Suigetsu said… that Amegakure is built on ruins. Glowing ruins.”

Tsunade narrows her eyes. “He didn’t tell me the structures went that deep?”

Kakashi nods. “I don’t think it fazed him much.” He hesitates, pressing his lips together. “It’s always been a bit of a mystery that Amegakure is industrialized that much, right?”

Tsunade nods, slowly, “They never disclosed how they discovered their technologies, yes.”

Kakashi watches her, carefully. “Was it like this during the war already?”

Tsunade frowns, looking away, eyes unseeing on Konoha through the windows. “Yes… even Hanzo’s mask was a miracle of technology, then.” She takes a sip of her tea. “What are you thinking.”

Kakashi exhales, with a shake of his head. “I’m thinking we need to take another careful look at Nagato’s machine. Have to make a real effort to open relations to Amegakure.”

Tsunade swallows, and then clicks her tongue. “Not exactly easy. They only tolerated me and Suigetsu there, friendly would be too much of a stretch.”

Kakashi nods. “I know.” He leans back. “So what could we offer in return?”

Tsunade exhales, through her nose, and then leans back, stapling her fingers. “Now that is the question, isn’t it.”

 

Kakashi raises his eyebrows, staring down at his scroll, unseeing. “We need access to whatever they found. One way or the other. I have already spoken with Sasuke. He will open relations with them, and then Hanabi will visit them in a while, enter negotiations. I have already enrolled her into a training program with one of the daimyo’s aides.”

Tsunade blinks, tone dry. “Bet Sasuke loved that.”

Kakashi snorts. “Indeed. But Hanabi loves the idea and so he accepted it.”  He hesitates, and then adds, softly: “He has loosened up so much. I am so happy for him.”

A slow grin spreads over Tsunade’s face. “I was just talking to Itachi about that the other day. He told me that he had a laughing fit with Sasuke, over some kind of dumb joke, just a while back. He said that that had been something he’d never ever expected to see.”

Kakashi snorts, pushing at the scroll in front of him, just a bit. “Happiness will make you silly.”

Tsunade purses her lips. 

 

She leans forward a bit, lowering her voice. “It can also make you feel embarrassingly stupid - why didn’t you tell me he was that good?”

Kakashi freezes… and then shoves back, hands in front of his face, voice between a whine and howling with laughter. “Oh god, please no, too much information??!”

Tsunade snorts, and then chuckles, evilly. “Oh please, suck it up, you’ll have to listen”, she makes a sweeping hand gesture, and Kakashi groans in mock horror, watching her through his fingers, “to it aaalll….”

Kakashi bends over a bit, wheezing, trying not to imagine, thank you very much, shaking his head. He sniffs, trying to contain the mirth, and the overpowering urge to go over and hug the shit out of her, shaking his head once. Trying to sound neutral. “Well, I mean, now you know where Icha Icha come from…”

Tsunade cackles, eyes sparkling. “That scene in ‘Icha Icha Tactics’… “

Kakashi interjects, hastily. “Yes, yes, that was… “ A reference to me. Us. He blushes, spectacularly. 

He clears his throat, tone gruff. “Don’t let him write any more books would be my advice?”

Tsunade leans back, snickering, eyes closed, and Kakashi watches her for a long moment, and then joins in, the mirth crumbling the embarrassment to dust in the process.

 

The soft words sober him though, immediately, driving right through all his defenses, and jabbing at his very core. “He told me I could age now.”

Kakashi swallows, the smile dying on his lips, and the reaches up, to wipe the tears of laughter away, feeling not like laughing anymore, at all.

He nods, once. “And, will you?”

 

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow, and looks out of the window, with a sigh. “We’ll see.” She blinks, her eyes finding his for a long moment. “You should talk, there on Mount Myōboku.”

Kakashi nods again, licking his lips. “I see.”

 

 

Tsunade’s smile is warm and gentle, and brittle. “Seize the day, Kakashi. Seize the day.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“Sakura-chan.”

 

Sakura’s face lights up, with a huge smile. “Sensei.” She grimaces, looking down at her hands, currently stuck in the abdomen of a small cat. Which looks dead.

Kakashi grimaces. “Am I… interrupting?”

Sakura shakes her head, slowly, and then green light pulses, almost violently bright for a split second. One paw twitches, and then… nothing.

Sakura groans. “Dammit.” She sighs, and then withdraws her hands, slowly, stepping over to wash her hands, thoroughly. “No… this is Hana… she got in-between a house wall, and a crate that slipped off a hand truck.” She shrugs, reaching for the disinfectant. “I tried to repair the damage to the intestines. Maybe…” She trails off, with a shake of her head. “The girl she belonged to watched it happen. She cried so terribly, apparently the cat was her most precious possession.” She sniffs, and then turns to Kakashi, with a sigh. “I just had to try.”

Kakashi grimaces, too, and then steps closer, looking down at the small body. “I saw the paw twitch.”

Sakura grimaces. “Mammals are so much harder than fish. And reviving is a whole different matter than just repairing.” She rolls her shoulders, reaching up to massage the left one with her right hand. “Though I have the basic skill of creating matter now, it’s still very different to create living matter. To make it work and energize it at the same time, in sync.”

Kakashi frowns, watching her. “You’re practicing this regularly?”

Sakura shakes her head. “Sometimes, only. But I mean, I should, right.” She waggles her eyebrows, holding out her palm. “Look at that, Sensei.”

She concentrates, and there is a moment of nothing, and then a black rod grows out of her palm, slowly, coming to lie calmly and innocently between her fingers. 

Kakashi’s voice is a bit pressed, while he tries to hide his instinctual… revulsion. “Impressive.”

 

Sakura hums, obviously concentrating once more to sever it, and then picks it up, staring at it with a somewhat forlorn expression on her face. “I know how they do that now… or, better, how it did that. But I’m still so slow, it hardly counts as a weapon.”

Kakashi nods, and then makes himself reach out, touching the surface.

He shivers. “It feels like theirs did.”

Sakura nods, watching him with a sober expression. “Kaguya says it is.”

Kakashi exhales. “Which means it’s conductive. Chakra sensitive, too.” He frowns, looking up to her. “How much of you… your cells, your power does it take to create it.”

Sakura huffs a laugh, quirking an eyebrow. “Approximately two muffins, and a coffee.”

Kakashi blinks.

Sakura’s stomach rumbles, as if on cue.

She grins. “Told ya.”

 

Kakashi snorts, feeling some of the dread drop away again. “I see.” He looks down at the dead cat, and sighs, reaching out to hover his fingertips over a whisker for a moment. 

And then he takes out his purse, pushing some money into Sakura’s hand, ignoring her protests. “The girl should mourn… Hana, but maybe the means to get another cat eventually would be nice as well.”

Sakura ducks her head, with a sniff, and a nod. “I’ll take care of it.”

Kakashi nods, too, and then shrugs. “I’ll be away for a few weeks, the Godaime is standing in for me. Can I ask you to support her?”

Sakura laughs at him. “Who. My teacher?”

Kakashi snorts softly. “Yes.” He leans in, waggling his eyebrows. “Still lots to learn there, in regards to leading, too.”

Sakura hums, eyes twinkling. “I doubt I would be able to get anywhere near the hat while Naruto is alive.”

Kakashi snorts, and then hesitates, with a shiver. “Probably.” 

He pushes the feeling away without examining it further, refusing to examine it further, giving her an eye-smile. “Sakura-chan.”

 

Sakura winks at him. “Have fun on your trip, Sensei!”

Kakashi winks back. “I will.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

He watches them embrace, from a few feet off, watches Jiraiya almost swallow the petite woman in his hug.

 

Naruto shifts a bit, in his own embrace, to press his chest into his side, and put his head on Kakashi’s shoulder.

Kakashi lets his head fall onto his, just softly.

 

And breathes.

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

I recently listened again to “Eternal flame” by The Bangles… I thought about threading it into that scene for Kakashi, but it seemed too much. Love that song though. And I think Kakashi would “steal” a lot of these small, private moments for himself, after all he’s been through. :)

Chapter 59: Touch the darkness

Notes:

I know the “Rings of Power” is not everyone’s cup of tea (to put it mildly), but I for one really liked the distinction made when Galadriel asked how exactly one can know if the light is the light… or the light reflecting off the darkness.

I kinda called back to that here.

Also: you do remember the food they served in frog-land, right. 😈

One more thing: small callback to Orochimaru’s experiments (talking about that towards the end of the chapter), so some spoons necessary I guess.

Chapter Text

“Oh god you brought rations.”

 

Kakashi snorts. “Enough to support an arm…” He trails off, watching Naruto shove one ration bar into his mouth, and almost swallowing it whole. “… Ok, maybe not supporting any armies. I take it the training went well?”

Naruto nods, still chewing. “Mhh hmm! I managed to summon the toad on first try! Ero-Sennin says that with the exception of the Amaterasu no-one has ever managed to escape it’s stomach, so that’s a nice thing to have in my arsenal.” Naruto pulls a face, leaning in to whisper loudly. “Though it is somewhat disgusting, honestly, and not a nice death.”

Kakashi grimaces as well. “No death is particularly nice, but… maybe remember that when you employ that.”

Naruto nods, reaching for another ration. 

Kakashi lightly slaps his hand away. “Noooooo, that is meant as proper nourishment. Not as a snack. And dinner is coming up in only a bit, so no snacks.”

Naruto glowers at him. “Have you enjoyed Fukasaku’s… hospitality before?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “No, but we are invited for dinner tonight, and as the current ruling Hokage,”, he hesitates, lifting his eyebrows with a rather meaningful look thrown Naruto’ way, “and the in all likelihood upcoming one with me we have to go.” He hesitates, suppressing a shudder. “And eat.”

Naruto’s glower intensifies.

 

Kakashi clears his throat. “I’ll make it up to you?… honey?”

Naruto snorts, shaking his head with his eyes closed. “You better.” He points a finger. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you though.”

Kakashi hums. “We’ll survive.”

Naruto groans, loudly.

 

Kakashi grins, and then bends down to Naruto’s neck, pulling down his mask to press a kiss to the sweaty skin there. “You should shower.”

Naruto hums, tilting his head away, so Kakashi can worry that spot with his teeth. “Come with?”

Kakashi rumbles, low in his throat, feeling the goosebumps under his lips. He nips and sucks on the spot for a second, before nibbling a line up Naruto’s throat, to dip his tongue into his ear for just a moment, enjoying the full-body jerk that follows, accompanied by a gasp. “Since you ask so nicely.”

Naruto snickers, and then moans, when Kakashi sucks on his earlobe. 

His fingers go up into Kakashi’s hair, push him down to that spot again, undulating when Kakashi starts nipping and sucking at it again. “Gonna be late…”

Kakashi grins against the skin. “We’ll see.”

Naruto’s left hand finds his right, to push it between his own legs, letting Kakashi feel.

His voice is carried on a moan. “Very late.”

 

Kakashi grins against the skin under his lips, concentrates, and…

 

Nothing, nothing and the cold of space.

 

…and then stumbles over the edge of the small pond with Naruto, the moment of vertigo as they fall almost hilarious, with Naruto’s limbs flying out to find purchase… and then locking on and around Kakashi’s tightly.

 

Cold water, shocking them apart.

 

Naruto comes up, spluttering, shaking his wet hair like a dog.

Kakashi snickers. 

 

Naruto grumbles at him. “Ass.” He sniffs, hovering in the shallow pond, legs folded under him. 

Kakashi pushes up onto his knees as well, shuffling over slowly.

With a grin.

 

Naruto snarls, just a bit. “I should just shower and leave you here after that little stunt.” He looks around, scoffing when he sees the blade. “You really went and prepared this?”

Kakashi grins. “With Sora’s knife, yes. This is our private pond for the stay.”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow. “Oh?”

Kakashi hums. “Mh hmmmm…. And I had lots of time today, you know?” He clicks his tongue, while reaching out to drag down Naruto’s zipper, slowly. “Talking with Sora, lying in the sun, preparing…”

Naruto’s nostrils flare.

Kakashi grins and then bites his lips. “Been waiting for you.” 

Naruto leans in, to press a quick, surprisingly gentle kiss onto his lips. 

His voice is soft. “I know.”

 

Kakashi blinks, momentarily floored, and then lets it go, the effort needed surprisingly little. 

He swallows, reaching up to push Naruto’s jacket off his shoulders, throwing it over the edge of the pond. Pushes the fishnet shirt up, watching Naruto squirm a bit, under his tickling fingers.

Kakashi hums. “You’ve put on muscle.”

Naruto shrugs, just a bit. “I’ve been on lots of missions.” He leans in, whispering against Kakashi’s lips. “I’ve been exercising a lot, too.” Naruto grins, letting his lips wander over and down, to bite softly into the meat of Kakashi’s throat, making him moan, white-hot energy zipping through him. “So have you.”

Kakashi undulates against him, feeling the answering hardness for a moment. 

He grins, drawling a bit. “Well, you promised you’d keep me in shape?”

Naruto laughs, gutturally, and then pulls him in to kiss him, a searing kiss, one that takes Kakashi’s thoughts. 

 

He shivers under Naruto’s hands, suddenly free of his garments.

There’s heat around him, inside the cold.

 

There’s gold in Naruto’s eyes, and orange around them, when Kakashi opens his own.

 

And a grin on the clone’s face, when he leans in to kiss Kakashi.

 

 

Kakashi shivers, feeling the water slosh, and then heat, heat on him, sucking, and soft suckling, on his nipples, and lips, everywhere, worshipping him.

Tongues, lapping at his skin, mouths gliding. 

 

And that mouth keeps kissing him, while hands hold him, and Kakashi gives himself over to it, immobilized, floating, offers himself, easily. 

 

 

Comes home, when Naruto finally takes him, so gently it hurts.

 

 

His eyes are golden still, making Kakashi ride the cresting wave, until he screams.

 

 

 

Silence, broken by shuddering gasps.

 

And then darkness, for a while.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Naruto’s fingers are playing with his hair, while his head is lying on Kakashi’s chest, half draped over his naked body, obviously listening to Kakashi’s heartbeat.

 

Kakashi can feel the smile spread. “You’re awake.”

Kakashi hums, licking his lips, hands coming up to hold Naruto, gently, stroke the cheek and whiskers, just as gently. “Did we miss dinner?”

Naruto snickers, turning into his hand to kiss the palm, and then settle back in. “No. I sent a clone and asked them to postpone. They were happy to.” He chuckles. “There might be insinuations later.”

Kakashi smiles softly, too sated and tired to care. “I see.”

Naruto exhales, breath puffing against Kakashi’s fingers. “I felt you, everywhere.”

Kakashi shifts a bit, licking his lips. “So did I… were all your clones in sage mode?”

Naruto hums, with a miniature nod. “Yeah… “ He blinks, with a small snort. “I remember when I could only do two… that was around the time that I was in prison. I had them stay and collect the energy, while I was moving around.” Kakashi can feel him swallow. “Imagine how that would have turned out if I had been able to create them on a whim, like now…”

 

Kakashi grimaces, some of the relaxation and sated numbness disappearing, instantly.

He makes himself ask. “Do you think about that? Often I mean?”

Naruto shakes his head, minutely. “No, just… sometimes.” He frowns, pushing his chin into Kakashi’s chest for a moment. “We’ve been over that. Just…”

Kakashi draws a finger over lashes, and an eyebrow. “Yes?”

 

Naruto shifts, to look up at him. Kakashi wriggles until he can look down at him, a bit uncomfortably. “I embraced my darkness on that island… back then, while training with Killer-B and right before the war I mean. Literally, even.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Literally?”

Naruto grins, for a moment. “Yeah, the waterfall there… it made me see it. Feel it. Touch it.” Naruto’s eyes are faraway, before they refocus on Kakashi’s, with a blink. “He was so hurt.”

Kakashi swallows, hands coming up to lightly rest on Naruto’s arms and shoulders. “Was?”

Naruto exhales through his nose, and then shrugs. “I accepted him, there.” Naruto hums. “He was so full of rage and fury. Rejecting the very idea that that pain could leave him…”

Kakashi swallows, his voice deliberately soft. Prompting, though he knows. “What pain.”

There’s a quick, brittle grin on Naruto’s lips, there and gone again. “Oh you know, how people treated me, how I was always alone, how I resented it, deep down, when I became aware that I was the jinchuriki…”

Kakashi grimaces, watching his face carefully. “You never let on that you hated that part.”

Naruto snorts. “And what good would it have done?” He rolls his eyes. “There wasn’t an option for me to change that fact… when… when I knew what was in me for the first time I went and looked it up. Stole into the vaults like a thief to read the scrolls.” Naruto grimaces, working his jaw for a moment. “There was a scroll detailing other nations stealing the bijous through history… it made it very clear that the jinchuriki didn’t survive extraction.” He snorts. “Obviously they were wrong about that in regards to Mom, but…”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, softly stroking the skin under his fingers. 

Naruto rolls his eyes again. “There was a darkness in me, seething. Kurama fed on it, easily.” He sniffs. “When you… when Pain…” He trails off.

 

Kakashi hums, remembering, vividly. “I think though that is something that needed to happen.”

Naruto snorts. “Trusting fate here?”

Kakashi shrugs, just lightly. “No, not really, just…” A powerful mode for you, possible only after that fight. A sense of belonging for me, eventually, after meeting my father. A meeting for you with Minato, in that space, where you could lay some of the blame. He exhales, through his nose. “I’m glad you embraced it all there.”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow. “Sasuke helped.” He raises his eyes to Kakashi’s, watching him, and Kakashi tries not to shift under the gaze, flinch. “You helped, eventually, too.” Naruto lifts his eyebrows, tone faraway. “I always wondered, after, if my darkness was the thing that kept us apart.”

Kakashi frowns. “What do you mean?”

Naruto shrugs. “Just that… I recognized the bond after, right. I mean, I knew by then, but…” He swallows, and then smiles, beatifically, for just a moment. “That moment of realization there on that battlefield… that influx of energy… there was a sheerness to it, beautiful and fragile, and devastating.” He scrunches his eyes shut for a long moment. “He didn’t want that… he resented the very notion of that. All hackles raised.” Naruto shakes his head once, clicking his tongue. “Still grumbled, when it happened.”

Kakashi prompts softly. “He?”

Naruto sighs. “My alter ego. Black and red eyed hate-filled waterfall image.” His voice drops to a whisper. “The one who was my strength when all else failed. Who reached out to Kurama, and felt at home in the bijou’s anger.”

Kakashi nods, once, tone careful. “You think you were only able to accept… us… when you accepted the darkness in you.”

Naruto looks up at him. “There’s darkness in you, too.” His eyes flit away, for a moment, before returning to Kakashi’s. “Shikamaru called you a killer, save for your heart.”

Kakashi smiles, just a bit painfully. “Well, I am.”

Naruto lifts his eyebrows. “So am I.”

Kakashi shakes his head, once. “Not like me.”

Naruto snorts. “No, if and when I snap, I lay villages to rest.”

Kakashi grimaces. “Naruto…”

 

Naruto laughs, caustically. “I’m serious. You are incredibly powerful, one on one, and against an army… but against one enemy after the other. I, on the other hand…” He snorts. “It really is no surprise they used to lock us up.”

Kakashi glowers at him, suddenly quite pissed. “You make it sound as if it was really for the best at times.”

Naruto snorts, and then pushes up, the loss of him a jab to Kakashi’s heart. 

Naruto rubs his face. “Well, I have thought about all that. Talked about it, too.”

“To?” Kakashi pushes up as well, slowly. 

Naruto shrugs. “Gaara. B.” He shoots a look at Kakashi, just a bit guiltily. “It’s not that I don’t think you’d understand, just…”

Kakashi holds up a hand, interjecting calmly. “No, no, it’s alright, I get it.” 

Naruto nods, lips pressed together. 

He clears his throat. “Who did you talk to?”

Kakashi snorts, waggling his eyebrows. “Jiraiya?”

Naruto snickers, and it destroys the gloom that had settled, breaks it with the ease of fresh air, filling lungs. “I bet he didn’t do just talking.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, but joins then snicker, refusing to blush. “Yeah, well…” He shoots Naruto a look. “You weren’t exactly surprised…”

Naruto grins, nose scrunched. “He had a hard time converting that one scene in the book to… be printable.”

Kakashi groans, hiding his face behind his hands. “Ah damn, right.” He spreads his fingers, just a bit, to stare at Naruto. “Don’t tell me…”

Naruto snorts. “Oh, I so did?”

Kakashi groans.

Naruto leans in, waggling his eyebrows. “I remember how it excited me… I mean, he wouldn’t tell, not really, and for all his insinuations and bad habits he never…”, he trails off, gesticulating a bit vaguely, “he never took that one step too far, you know? I was never allowed to go into the brothels with him, though I sometimes went and dragged him out of them. I had time to myself, to train, to…” Naruto trails off, ducking his head.

Kakashi reaches up, threads his fingers through gold, gently. “He once told me you came back late at times, in one of the villages. He thought you were having a flirt. Or more.”

Naruto leans into his hand, eyes sparkling. “I did.”

 

Kakashi grins, a bit forcedly, viciously suppressing the idiotic jealousy that wants to rise. “Oh?”

Naruto shrugs, while dropping his head into Kakashi’s hand, eyes slitted. “There was this girl… she was nice to me. She gave me a peck. We… kinda made out a bit the next evening.” Naruto snorts. “I mean, we were like… thirteen? Nothing happened. But it was exciting nonetheless, and it was so…” He frowns, obviously searching for the right word. 

Kakashi watches him, waiting a moment before prompting. “Freeing?”

Naruto’s eyes find his. “Yeah, that. We both knew that wasn’t anything serious, she was just trying things out, I was just trying things out, she liked me and never showed any sign she knew who and what I was…”

Kakashi hums. “No strings attached.”

 

Naruto nods. “What about you?”

Kakashi snorts, shifting to sit a bit sideways, Naruto shifting into his embrace, easily. “Oh, I went always for lots of strings attached.” Naruto snorts, and Kakashi exhales, with a shake of his head. “No, really, I… think I knew when I met Iruka that it wasn’t a fling. And even…” He clicks his tongue, feeling Naruto listen, closely. “And even what Jiraiya and I shared wasn’t a fling. There’s way too much… connection.” Kakashi snorts. “Jiraiya told me that I likely never had sex for the pleasure of it only, and that that needed correction.” Naruto snickers and Kakashi chimes in, for a moment. “I’m paraphrasing here, but…” He shakes his head. “He was right, then. I needed that.”

Naruto hums, shifting closer with a sigh, the touch of him burning. “His books wouldn’t be so successful if he were a total idiot in regards to the heart, smut or not.”

Kakashi blinks, somewhat floored. “I guess you’re right.”

Naruto tilts his head, presses a kiss to Kakashi’s jaw. “I often am.”

Kakashi drawls. “Really.”

Naruto grins.

 

And sobers, slowly. “It was bad, when he died. Or, when we thought he did.” He leans back a bit, to look Kakashi in the eye. “I wasn’t sure I’d be able to keep the darkness at bay… Sensei Iruka helped then.” He blinks. “You didn’t.”

Kakashi opens his mouth, closes it again, before finally pressing the words out. “I… couldn’t breathe.”

Naruto frowns. “You didn’t let that on, then.”

Kakashi snorts. “But you do know me better now, right.”

Naruto’s hand comes up, to push the hair out of Kakashi’s forehead. “I do.” Naruto trails his fingers down, gently, the fingertips catching a bit on the stubble. “You touched the darkness then, too.”

Kakashi frown, tone soft. “I… often touch the darkness. Not as often now as I used to, but… sometimes, you have to make sure you’re heading for the light by reaching out and pushing back off of it is one way to do that. Making yourself see that you’re not submerged under the mirror image of light reflecting off the surface of its tar.”

Naruto blinks. “… Poetic?”

Kakashi snorts. “No, just something I heard once. It fits.”

Naruto exhales, in a rush. “Touching the darkness helps finding your own footing.”

Kakashi nods. “Your own stance, yes. At times.” He quirks an eyebrow. “Like you, deciding to embrace it. That’s touching it, too. It’s a conscious decision and a reassurance at the same time.”

Naruto hums, eyes faraway. “I used to touch Kurama’s cage, wanting to connect. But he’s not evil, not dark. But it used to be dark there, in that place.”

Kakashi reaches up, to trace a whisker. “But you wanted to be close, and I think Kurama has always been dangerous comfort for you. An instinctual comfort, too.”

Naruto’s throat clicks as he swallows. “The only being sharing my life.” He sniffs. “At least for a long while.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long moment. “I am sorry.”

 

Naruto nods, and then clears his throat, pasting a smile on. “Ero-Sennin says I should still… yell at my Dad for it all.”

Kakashi blinks, quirking an eyebrow. “You haven’t?”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “Well, I mean, the right moment never came. It’s just so…” He shrugs. “I really don’t want to spend my time fighting with him…”

Kakashi shakes his head, once. “I really don’t think you’ll fight. He knows what he’s done… and you know that, too.”

Naruto sniffs, lowering his gaze. “Think Mom ripped him a new one already?”

Kakashi snorts, but then nods, giving a heartfelt: “Yes.”

Naruto snickers, helplessly.

 

Kakashi watches him for a long moment, lets the love come, this all-encompassing, almost stifling love, lets it fill him, make his heart stumble, and his throat close off, makes the tattoo burn.

Naruto’s cheeks flush, just lightly. Whispering. “Stop it.”

Kakashi smirks, softly. “Stop what?”

Naruto ducks his head, puts his cheek against Kakashi’s. “Looking at me like that. Reaching like that. It’s like a wave, a wave of love, and it’s swallowing me up.”

Kakashi hums, and then deliberately waggles his eyebrows, leering. “I could swallow something else up?”

Naruto groans, loudly, and then swats him, lightly, cackling under his breath. “Bad boy.”

Kakashi grins, rumbling between them. “Whoof.”

Naruto grins. 

 

They share a long look, and then Kakashi reaches up, traces the lips, gently. Watches Naruto nip at the passing fingertips.

He whispers. “Talking to one’s father is a good thing though. It was for me. I know it’ll be for you.”

Naruto exhales, softly. “Alright. When we get home.”

Kakashi nods, once, shivering with the kiss that Naruto is now pressing to his fingers. “Alright.”

Naruto smiles, gently, against his fingertips. “We should go to dinner.”

Kakashi blinks, and then draws him down, to kiss him. “Yeah. We should.”

 

Naruto snickers, into his mouth.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“You know, being this late is almost being early.”

 

Kakashi ducks his head, while Naruto simply beams, dragging him along by his hand. “Yeah, well, what can I say, we…”

Jiraiya waves his hand. “Oh please. Shut it.” He rubs his hands. “Finally dinner!”

Shima laughs, her joyful voice carrying humor. “Well, the ingredients only get softer by stewing them, I’m sure you’ll appreciate it.”

Kakashi swallows, taking a look at the colorful ingredients floating in the stew. “Yes, thank you for waiting for us.”

Naruto cackles, under his breath.

Fukasaku hums, waiting for his wife to settle as well before he continues. “We are happy to wait for you. It is not often that we have such illustrious company.”

Jiraiya snorts, reaching for a cup with what is, quite obviously, sake. “You were only loathe to interrupt them.”

Kakashi blushes a bit, shooting a look at Naruto, who is grinning, fiendishly. “Err, I’m sorry…”

Shima waves at him. “Don’t be. Young love needs what young love needs. We checked in on you from time to time so I could adapt the heat.”

Kakashi freezes for a split second, and then Naruto leans into him, tone very amused. “I mean, you do know I learned sage mode from them, right?” He blinks, exaggeratedly, eyelids fluttering. “Honey?”

Kakashi glowers at him, while trying to push the mortification down.

He clears his throat. “Well, we won’t let you wait again.”

Naruto groans. With a roll of his eyes.

Jiraiya snickers. 

 

Kakashi reaches for his cup, glad that Jiraiya has already filled it, the alcohol grounding him.

Jiraiya sends him a look over the rim of his own cup. “Naruto told you that he managed the jutsu just fine?”

Kakashi nods, putting the cup down again. “Yes. Quite handy.” And quite a feat. He shares a look with Naruto, and a quick smile, and then shrugs. “So what else have you planned for the rest of the week?”

Jiraiya cackles. “Well, I thought maybe he could learn how to use spy frogs, hmm? That could come in handy, too.” He turns to Naruto. “What do you think?”

Naruto beams at him. “Can’t wait.”

Shima claps her hands. “First, food. Dig in, please.”

Kakashi hesitates, sorely tempted to just reach for his sake again, but he holds out his plate instead, eyeing the bugs and worms in the bowl dubiously. “Just a small portion, please. I…” am not hungry. 

It’s what he wants to say, but his stomach rumbles, which throws Shima into an almost fit of paternal delight, filling his plate up to the brim.

Kakashi stares down at it.

Naruto leans in, voice chipper. “Perfect proteins, Sensei.”

Kakashi sends him a skunk-eye. Naruto snickers.

Jiraiya grins, and then smacks his lips, holding out his plate as well. “It’s an acquired taste.” He bows his head in thanks and then grins at Kakashi. “But I agree, the food is very good, nutritionally.”

Fukasaku hums, receiving his own portion, and starting after a short moment of mental collection, slurping a big worm in with obvious delight. “We always make sure that the ones we serve are digestible for you big folks.”

Kakashi nods, slowly, insanely glad for his mask. He picks one bug up, glad that it has been decapitated already at least.

Naruto points his finger. “Oh that’s yummy. Just pull off the wings. The rest is good. Scrunchy.” He waggles his eyebrows, reaching into his own bowl to pull out one of these bugs as well, demonstrating. 

Speaking, while chewing, noisily. “See?”

Kakashi wants vegetables, now.

 

He makes himself nod. “Yes, thank you.”

He exhales, and then follows Naruto’s example with a burst of speed, the taste not half as bad as expected, indeed, if you can get past the mental image.

He swallows it down, expecting his stomach to rebel any moment, but it doesn’t, and Kakashi sighs, under his breath, reaching for a worm.

Naruto beams at him, quite obviously proud.

Jiraiya lifts his cup again. “Better with sake.”

Kakashi nods, silently, and takes a sip, trying to ignore how the dead worm wobbles with the movement.

 

Fukasaku happily slurps down another bug of his own, and then points a finger, at Jiraiya, while addressing Kakashi. "Jiraiya-boy is filling up again.“

Kakashi smirks, seeing Jiraiya roll his eyes. "Indeed. A good thing to see.“

Jiraiya‘s eyes are dark, glittering. 

Kakashi swallows, voice brittle. "I‘d never have thought.“

Jiraiya smiles softly, with a shrug. "It was a gamble. It paid off.“ He leans over, eyebrows waggling. "I‘m much better at these things than Tsunade.“

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head.

Naruto snickers. "Ahhh, remember how we went from one casino to the next, and everyone was just… she just lost everything and left?“

Jiraiya snorts. "Indeed. I still don‘t know how she does it. By all intents and purposes she should be broke for eternity and back.“

Kakashi winks at him. "Not a secret she shares?“

Jiraiya harrumphs. "You have no idea.“ They share a grin, and then Jiraiya sobers, looking at them. "Seeing you two here, now, is beyond what I hoped for, I hope you realize that.“ He hesitates, reaching for his sake. "So, when‘s the wedding?“

Kakashi sighs. "We don‘t kn…“

Naruto happily babbles on. "Know yet but sometime next spring.“

Kakashi blinks, turning his head to look at him.

Naruto shrugs. "That‘s when Hinata and Tenten and Shikamaru and all the others want to marry, too, right?“ He grins, teeth flashing. "It‘s going to be a riot!“

Kakashi stares at him, echoing. "All the others?“

Naruto shrugs. "Well, almost all the others. Sasuke and Hanabi not, probably. They know they have to wait a bit still, though I’m not sure how they see it. But the others…“

Kakashi blinks again, slowly. "I see.“

Jiraiya snickers. "Your bachelor days are counted, Kakashi.“

Naruto scoffs, heat behind his words that Kakashi actually hadn‘t expected there to be. "Oh, he‘s utterly off the market already, and I hope you know that.“

Kakashi watches in fascination as Jiraiya‘s eyebrows climb up, while he obviously tries to curb his mirth. 

He drawls. "Really…“

Naruto glowers at him.

Jiraiya chuckles, and then winks at Kakashi. "Good to know.“

Shima reaches over, pats Naruto‘s arm. "Now, now, young one, he won‘t interfere… otherwise he will find himself a frog statue real soon.“

Jiraiya blinks, glowering at her a bit. 

And then says, rather loftily: "His loss.“

Kakashi bites his tongue, tasting the words he wants to utter, but knowing Naruto would not appreciate them.

 

Fukasaku slurps up his broth, looking mightily satisfied, beaming at his wife. "A fine meal, dear. I thank you.“ He looks at Kakashi. "Would you like more?“

Kakashi looks down at his still half filled bowl, at the things he has not tasted yet. Remembers who he is, now.

He nods. "Sure. Just a bit though, please.“

Jiraiya‘s eyes twinkle at him, proudly, while Shima refills his bowl.

 

Naruto‘s hand is in his back, thumb rubbing in circles.

 

 

 

 

 

********

 

 

 

 

 

"To you and him.“

 

Kakashi lifts his cup, softly clinks it with Jiraiya‘s. "To you and her… may your days be filled with peace and love.“

Jiraiya hums, weighing his head. "As many as we‘ll get of those days, yes.“

Kakashi frowns, trying to ignore the ice travelling down his spine. "What do you mean?“

Jiraiya sighs, and then takes a sip. "Kakashi, Tsunade used up a not exactly small portion of her energy, her life energy to revive me. And she managed, a feat that was almost, but not quite, impossible.“

Kakashi swallows, watching him. "But?“

Jiraiya lifts his head, the long white hair flowing. "But the wound that damaged my heart back then already had done its damage.“

Kakashi whispers. "Naruto‘s wound you mean. Kurama‘s.“

Jiraiya smiles. "She told me long ago, after we came back, that my heart was damaged. It is why I was able to slip into the water and continue drawing on energy to be frank, because I was already, constantly, supporting it.“

Kakashi blinks, his vision wobbly for an instant. "I don‘t understand, couldn‘t you just continue doing that?“

Jiraiya nods. "I could.“ He clicks his tongue. "And I will… until the day her energy runs out.“

Kakashi blinks, very slowly, watching him. "You think that‘s not so far off.“

Jiraiya sighs, through his nose. "Not as far as I would like…“ He turns to Kakashi. "But much farther away than I dared hope.“ He stares at Kakashi, intently. "We have been granted a reprieve, much like Kushina and Minato.“ Jiraiya turns away again, to look at the stars. "A chance to teach our pupils, and speak with friends. A chance to find love again, and peace.“ He clicks his tongue. "A chance to be.“

 

Kakashi smiles, wobbly, and then drowns his cup, rubbing a hand over his face after.

Jiraiya‘s voice is gentle. "I thank you for removing your mask around me now… we are not who we were, but I do appreciate the gift.“ He shoots Kakashi a look. "Very much.“

Kakashi snorts, with a vague blush. "Yeah, well…“

 

They are silent for a long moment, watching the stars over the mountains.

 

Eventually, Kakashi speaks up again. "Sora is not happy to see the experiments continuing.“

Jiraiya snorts, and then cackles. "No shit.“ He points a finger. "I cannot blame her, and yet I find no fault in your ruling. And I told her that.“

Kakashi grimaces, ducking his head a bit. “Thank you.“ He hesitates, and then adds, softly. "Tobirama‘s body is still there.“

Jiraiya nods, once.

Kakashi continues, after a long moment. "Do you want to bury it?“

Jiraiya sniffs, and then empties his own cup as well, reaching for the bottle, after. "I should, shouldn‘t I.“

Kakashi watches him, tries to decipher the emotions he can see flitting over the big Sannin‘s face. "Why don‘t you want people to know that he was your grandfather?“ He frowns. "I mean, there are people here who remember, it cannot be… totally unknown?“

Jiraiya sighs, and then harrumphs, shooting Kakashi a look. "No. And it isn‘t. It‘s just not talked about. My mother was not someone who should have married the Hokage‘s son, if you catch my drift.“

Kakashi frowns. "I…“

Jiraiya sighs. "My father fell in love with a prostitute, on sight, he felt the thrum. The feelings were mutual, the bond made itself known. And he didn‘t care much about the opinion of others. Tobirama… actually didn‘t care too much either, but he had to care, if you know what I mean.“ Kakashi nods, mutely. Jiraiya grimaces. "When I grew up, there were a lot of… unsavory comments thrown my way. In a way, writing those novels was my very own way of dealing with that.“

Kakashi sniffs, staring up into the night sky. "What happened to them?“ 

Jiraiya shrugs. "He died in the war. She couldn‘t take the bond being severed. So she jumped off a cliff.“

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, for a long moment. 

He breathes the words. "I am so sorry.“

Jiraiya shakes his head, with a sniff. "History, long gone. I hope they‘re happy now.“ He shoots a look at Kakashi. "I hope they‘ll wait for me, like your Dad did for you…“

Kakashi smiles, brilliantly, while a tear drops down his face. "I‘m sure they will.“

 

They are silent for a moment, each remembering.

Kakashi prompts eventually, softly. "Tobirama loved you though, didn’t he. You told me he came by.“

Jiraiya nods. "Yes, and as I said, I‘d loved to see him during that… war.“ He snorts. "He invented so many jutsus we still use today, shaped this village so much…“ He sighs. "I really should bury his body, shouldn‘t I. Not that someone else thinks he can use that cursed jutsu again… that he invented, ironically.“

Kakashi whispers. "He invented it for his son, didn‘t he.“

Jiraiya smiles for a moment, wobbly, beatifically. "I think so.“

 

Kakashi nods, and then exhales, downing another cup, feeling the sake rush through him, with warmth.

Jiraiya puts his arm around him, and they stay there, watching the stars, while Fukasaku and Naruto laugh ferociously, somewhere beneath the small cliff they sit on, splashing through the pools at midnight.

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

Someone barrels into Naruto, with an unapologetic grin, and Kushina in his arm.

 

Kakashi grunts, glad for the reprieve, stepping back from training taijutsu with Naruto. "Sensei.“ He pushes up, slowing his breathing. "Did something happen?“

Kushina shakes her head, pony tail flying. "No, but we brought cake!“

 

Naruto groans, happily. "Awwww yisss, I‘m starving.“

Minato‘s voice is dry. "You‘re always starving.“

Naruto rolls his eyes. 

Kakashi chuckles, reaching for a towel. "We need to freshen up first.“

Kushina waggles her eyebrows. "Will you manage to come to us for the cake after, or should we make that a dessert for after dinner?“

Kakashi freezes for a split second, and then sends her a bit of a skunk-eye.. "We do have some control, thank you very much?“

Minato snorts. "I know you have.“

Naruto pouts. "They‘re mobbing me…“

Kushina coos at him. "Just speaking the truth honey…“

Naruto rolls his eyes. "Yeah, I mean, according to Kurama I have that fro…“

He cannot continue, because Kushina has her hand over his mouth, waggling her other hand‘s index finger. "Uh uh, no, no, no, no, jinchurikis don‘t spill other jinchuriki‘s secrets…“

Kakashi opens his mouth. And then closes it again.

Sharing a long, long, rather amused look with Minato.

 

Who steps up, pulling Kushina away from Naruto gently. "Now, now, I think that ship has long sailed, don‘t you think?“ He grins and then winks at her. "Remember?“

Kakashi watches in fascination as Kushina blushes, deeply, and then rolls her eyes.

And then whirls around, pointing that finger at Kakashi. "Half an hour. At Fukasaku‘s and Shima‘s home.“

Kakashi bows to her. "As you wish.“

Naruto snickers.

 

And then reaches for Kakashi‘s hand, unceremoniously dragging him off to a pond with a small waterfall. "Half an hour. We can do that.“

Kakashi lets himself get dragged along, shooting a mock-panicked look at Minato. "Don‘t wait for us.“

Minato grins, and then calls mock-sternly after them: "Naruto, I‘ll come and flash you to us in exactly 31 minutes if you don’t show up on your own, better be ready for that.“

Kakashi stares back at Minato in abject horror, sees him snicker, ducking his head.

Kushina lifts her eyebrows, tone dry. "He may be kidding, but I‘m not?“

Kakashi turns his head back, to look at Naruto, catches his amused gaze. "Right.“

Naruto leans in, still dragging him rather forcefully, eyes blue fire. "Well, we gotta make it in twenty then, won‘t we.“

Kakashi snorts, and then squeezes his hand, grinning like a fiend. "Fifteen.“

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Mhhhh, tha‘s good cake.“

 

Jiraiya‘s voice is muffled, around a mouthful of cake, of which he‘d inhaled two whole pieces, in record time.

He swallows, pointing his finger at Naruto. "I have missed this cake, I cannot tell you how much. She used to make it every time I came by.“

Naruto grins, taking a big bite of his own. "It‘s really good.“

Kushina preens, and then leans into Kakashi, tone generous. "I‘ll give you the recipe.“

Kakashi blinks at her, and then shrugs. "I don‘t even have an oven?“

Kushina freezes, staring at him in mock horror. 

Kakashi cringes.

Kushina‘s voice is heated. "Hatake Kakashi, do you want to tell me that you wasted all those hours I spent teaching you everything?“

Kakashi‘s mouth drops open, and then he holds up a hand, painfully aware of the absolute delight with which Naruto, Jiraiya and Minato are watching. "I did no such thing. But you know I was Anbu, and after… you know, I didn‘t really…“

Kushina harrumphs. "My teaching you all those things besides fighting was not meant to be forgotten, but to bring you some actual joy living.“ She narrows her eyes. "What else have you forgotten?“

Kakashi stares at her, like a deer in headlights. "I…“ He lifts his finger. "I can cook good vegetable meals?“

Naruto pipes up. "Yeah, he always wanted to get me to eat them.“

Kushina turns to him, making him blanch. "And you didn‘t?“

Naruto grimaces, voice careful and apologetic. "Kakashi can also do fine fish?“

Kushina harrumphs.

Jiraiya chuckles, under his breath.

Taking a third piece of the cake.

 

Minato works his jaw, obviously trying to curb his mirth. "Honey, I looked into the reports, Kakashi really didn‘t have much chance to cook… or bake.“

Kushina growls under her breath, and Kakashi blinks, staring at her, before he shares a look with Naruto. Who hides a snicker.

Her voice is heated. "Oh, Hiruzen can be so happy I didn‘t know all this when I came back on the battlefield.“

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow.

 

Minato nods, and then addresses Jiraiya. "You didn‘t interfere back then, when he died, I mean. From what I understood from the scrolls you decided to engage the summons instead. Don‘t you think Orochimaru would have been irritated if you‘d sided with Hiruzen?“

Jiraiya weighs his head, brushing crumbs out of the corners of his mouth. "Maybe. I‘m not sure I could have breached the barrier.“

Minato nods. "But you didn‘t try.“

Jiraiya raises his eyebrows, nodding to himself. "No.“

Minato hums. "Why?“

Jiraiya scoffs. "Why did I, de facto, commit treason? If anybody would have actually thought about that, then?“ He weighs his head, and then shrugs. "Orochimaru deserved the confrontation. I just wished he had chosen a less bloody way, but I only came back when the barrier went up, and by then… I made sure no-one else died as soon as I was there. Except him, of course.“

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. Of course.

 

Fukasaku speaks up, for the first time since they settled down, quite happily listening before, obviously. "Jiraiya-boy, you did not commit treason.“

Jiraiya scoffs. "I did not try to save the Hokage, and I let my Sensei be killed.“ He weighs his head, voice acerbic. "Quite something.“

Kakashi watches him. "That is why you didn‘t want to even think about accepting the hat.“

Jiraiya scoffs. "I‘m like the worst candidate. And given my personal history…“ He trails off.

Naruto frowns, opening his mouth, but Kakashi puts a hand on his knee, glad when he gets the hint.

Kakashi clears his throat. "Still, I agree with Fukasaku. If anything, Hiruzen has betrayed our values, our village. Our people.“ He pauses, voice soft. "He deserved what happened to him.“

 

Kushina speaks up, voice surprisingly soft. "Jiraiya-san, don‘t you think we would have never named Naruto after your hero, and made you his godfather, if we didn‘t think you worthy?“

Kakashi watches in fascination, as the big Sannin‘s face crumbles, for just an instance. "No, I know you do.“

Minato reaches over, to clasp his hand. "You know we do.“ He smiles, gently, and then looks over at Kakashi and Naruto. "We‘re a family.“ He lifts his eyebrows, tone sly. "Patch-work, and fated, seemingly thrown together, and mixed through, here, now. But we are.“

Jiraiya sniffs, looking at him. "Seize the day.“

Naruto frowns, but with a grin. "Just like that?“

Jiraiya snorts. "Well, for some more than others… we need to decide what to do with the time that is given to us.“ He nods, quirking an eyebrow. He grins suddenly, clapping his hands. "Which means: more cake!“

 

Kakashi snorts. And then holds out his own plate, too. "Indeed.“

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Kushina loops her arm through his, matching her step to his, silent for long minutes.

 

Kakashi smiles at her, and keeps on walking, slowly, from time to time shooting a look over at the trio far away on the other side of the valley, doing some kind of summoning contest.

Kushina whispers, leaning in. “Naruto told me it took forever for him to summon a proper toad back then… apparently Orochimaru had tempered with the seal?” She smirks. “And then he went and summoned Gamabunta?”

Kakashi hums, remembering. “Guess Jiraiya didn’t tell you how he managed that?”

Kushina frowns. “What do you mean?”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, shaking his head once. “Nothing. Except you probably know that Jiraiya has his own methods.”

Kushina quirks an eyebrow, and then sighs, shaking her head with a cackle. “I guess I don’t want to know…” They share a chuckle, and she continues, after a moment, tone wistful. “Sora doesn’t want to know anything about the research centers. She’s blocking anything that could be even vaguely related to Orochimaru’s experiments.”

Kakashi grimaces. “I cannot blame her. We had heated discussions about that.” He sighs, heavily. “But it’s… We just cannot kill him, you know? And, so far, he is doing what he said he would, namely only use his own cells for the experiments.” He grimaces. “Far from ideal, I know, but…” 

Kushina blinks, looking up at him. “And of course you understand the drive.” She clicks her tongue. “The need.” She tilts her head, watching him closely. “The wish.”

 

Kakashi stops, and she turns to face him, releasing his arm in the process.

He shrugs. “I looked at some of the old records. It was… gruesome? Hiruzen let him continue for so long, officially, and…” Kakashi grimaces again, shaking his head. “If you look at the big picture it’s rather obvious. Orochimaru used babies… ostensibly because of the hormonal structure, the growth hormones, but… those children were the only ones he actually tried to keep alive. The others…” Kakashi waves his hand, trying not to feel too much. “The others were just bodies to him. Little more than sheer meat. Something to glean knowledge from.” He exhales. “But there are gaps between the tries with the babies… I think he needed time to recollect. Ground himself, too, maybe.” 

Kakashi’s voice drops to a whisper. “Mourn.”

 

Kushina looks at him, her dark blue eyes looking right into his soul. “Your body guard is that last  child, isn’t he.”

Kakashi nods, swallowing thickly. “Yes, Yamato was apparently the last experiment. The only successful one, too.” He hesitates, adding after a moment, voice low. “Back then, when I crossed his path for the first time… Orochimaru tried to capture him.” He frowns. “I always thought that maybe it was because of the Akatsuki, that he maybe wanted him to control the bijous, but sometimes I wonder now, if maybe…” He trails off.

Kushina nods, with a hum. “If, maybe, he wanted to get that baby back. If in his own, bizarre way Orochimaru is only trying to find love, too.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, voice brittle. “That is all we want, isn’t it. Deep, deep down, where we cannot hide from ourselves, we have to acknowledge at some point that we want to be loved, for ourselves.”

Kushina sniffs, and then nods, moving in to hug him.

Whispering. “Yes, and it’s… addictive to be.” They share a small chuckle, and Kushina moves back a bit, to look up at him. “If Orochimaru got a taste before, maybe… beyond what Hiruzen did, I mean, maybe from one of those children… then it would be logical for him to think that this love, this child’s pure love is the actual, and only love he seeks.” She clicks her tongue. “It may be the only love he can seek.”

Kakashi sighs, through his nose. “A child’s love is not guaranteed though. Lots of children hate their parents.”

Kushina weighs her head. “But we all want to love them. I think. It’s why a rift hurts us so much.” She averts her gaze, reaching out to squeeze Kakashi’s arm. “That’s why their death wounds us so.” She swallows, and then lifts her head and gaze once more, tone deliberately light. “Orochimaru’s child would be loved by him, of that I am pretty certain. And, in turn, that child would love him, because it is his child.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, relaxing a bit.

Kushina hums. “This has weighed on your mind.”

 

Kakashi shrugs. “Condemning children to something… is something I’m trying very hard to abolish.”

Kushina smirks, rubbing his arm again. “I know.”

 

They are silent for a long moment, and then Kushina turns, starting to walk again, slowly, and Kakashi falls into step with her, pushing his hands into his pockets.

 

Kushina smirks at him. “You still do that.”

Kakashi chuckles. “Some habits stay.”

Kushina hums. “Indeed.” She smirks to herself, and then bumps into him, on purpose. “So. You and Jiraiya?”

Kakashi snorts, and then blushes, shaking his head once. “Long, long ago. He…” He sobers, letting the emotions color his voice. “He helped me find my feet again when life pulled them out from under me.” He swallows, noisily. “Morally wrong or not for some…, it was something I desperately needed, then. And he knew that.” He frowns, lowering his voice. “I wouldn’t have made it without him.”

Kushina nods, clicking her tongue. “Good.” She winks at Kakashi. “That scene in Icha Icha Tactics was something else though.”

Kakashi grunts, pained. “Ah. You read it?”

Kushina snickers. “Minato wanted to read the books he didn’t know yet… we have read them all.”

Kakashi nods, and then shrugs, tone deliberately dead-pan. “Yep. That’s what you get when you get into bed with an author.”

Kushina laughs out, loudly, and Kakashi chimes in after a moment, looking up at the stars, the milky way very prominent tonight.

Kushina follows his gaze, still grinning, sobering slowly. 

Her tone is wistful. “Think they’re part of this galaxy?”

Kakashi blinks, and then shrugs, sobering slowly, too. “Not sure if that matters.”

Kushina clicks her tongue. “Quite a faith you have there in the Yamanaka.”

Kakashi hums, thoughts on Ino for a moment, and the eye she hides. His voice carries his conviction. “They’ll manage.”

Kushina looks at him, for a long moment, and then shrugs, tone light. “Alright.”

 

Kakashi nods to himself, and then smiles at her, while a star falls, burning through the sky.

 

 

 

 

Chapter 60: Cute little genins

Notes:

Callback to that fantasy in the lake, you know, with the desk. :) 😈.

Chapter Text

 

 

“I don’t get why you don’t want to send him on high ranking missions. He learned the Rasengan even faster than Naruto. He is the Sandaime’s grandchild, and the Sarutobi family has always produced extraordinary ninjas. And he is obviously burning to prove himself.”

Kakashi spreads his hands, watching Ebisu squirm. “This is frustrating for the whole team?”

 

Ebisu pushes his glasses up his nose, and then shifts to his other foot, pulling a face. “I know.”

Kakashi opens his mouth, and then closes it again, swallowing his originally planned reply down, with a frown. “You know?”

Ebisu shrugs.

Kakashi grinds his teeth for a long moment. 

Trying to keep his voice level. “Would you care to explain?”

Ebisu sighs, and then finally breaks, sitting down in the chair in front of Kakashi’s desk with a grunt. “It’s just that… Kakashi-san, when we’re on missions, a part of Konohamaru’s brain is always keeping taps on Naruto. What Naruto is doing, where he currently is, what the status of his relationship is, et cetera.”

Kakashi watches him, silently.

Ebisu sighs again. “It has always been that way. I am just afraid that he might be distracted when he should not be.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, shuffling through the papers in the reports on his desk. “There is no mention of any faults stemming from negligence though?”

Ebisu looks at him, and then shrugs.

 

Kakashi closes the folder, slowly.

“Ebisu-san, with the utmost respect: I hereby order you to take your team on the missions that fit the level of ability. If you fail to do so I will assign you to a different team, or remove you from roster.”

Ebisu blanches, and then nods, once, curtly.

He pushes up, hands behind his back. “Of course, Rokudaime-sama.”

Kakashi grimaces, but nods, his finger wanting to twitch when he sees Ebisu go, leaning back with a groan when the door closes behind him.

 

Shizune steps up from where she’d been watching, off to the side. “Uncomfortable, but necessary.”

Kakashi’s voice is muffled, from where he hides his face in his hands. “I have known Ebisu for so long, he is senior in service to the Hokage seat… it’s so weird to command him.” He sighs, lowering his hands. “And threaten him, too.”

Shizune weighs her head. “You only set him straight, and made him aware of the consequences. He should have taken a step back to look at what he’s doing on his own. Konohamaru’s frustration was and is well known.” Shizune grimaces, watching him. “It’s hard to escape your father’s shadow, and, though Konohamaru lost his parents, his uncle and grandfather took this role. And they were quite overpowering characters, in status and ability.”

 

Kakashi sighs, and then nods, rubbing a hand over his face again. “True. Ahhhh, how I wished Asuma was here. He’d just laugh at me, and it would make it better.”

Shizune exhales, and then looks out the window. “You aren’t visiting the cemetery as often as before… you could pay him a visit?”

Kakashi blinks, and then looks up at her, for a long moment. “I still have to…”

Shizune interrupts him, waving at him. “Shhhh. Off you go. Shikamaru and I will hold the fort.”

Kakashi swallows, and then closes his eyes for a long moment. “Sure?”

Shizune grins. “Yes. And do go by the Hyuuga complex after, I hear the ceremony is tonight. Would fit nicely if the Hokage came by to witness, right?” She waggles her eyebrows. “Or… soon-to-be family.”

Kakashi snorts, and then pushes up, squeezing her shoulder in passing. “Right.”

 

 

 

He walks out of the tower, slowly, turning to go by Kurenai’s on a whim.

Naruto is a pulse, in his consciousness.

 

 

 

Kurenai opens the door on third knock, vaguely disheveled, and quite obviously stressed and in the middle of folding laundry. “Kakashi. Do you need me for something official?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No, actually…” He shrugs, keeping his tone soft. “I wondered if I could pick up Mirai for a visit with her Dad.”

Kurenai blinks, and then smiles, a bit wobbly, stepping aside to invite him in. “Oh, that would be lovely. She’s in her room, want to get her ready, too?”

Kakashi nods. “Happily.” He looks at her, notices the air of urgency around her. Sees her put the laundry unceremoniously onto a cupboard.“You want to…” He trails off, lifting his eyebrows.

Kurenai exhales. “Go to the hairdresser.” They share a chuckle, and she shakes her head, with a shrug. “There’s a bit of flu outbreak at her daycare, and the teachers are sick, so she’s been staying home a bit. So you’re a godsend.”

Kakashi grins. “Sent by Shizune, and covered by her and Shikamaru.”

Kurenai smirks, while reaching for her purse. “I’ll make sure to say thank you later.” She waves and is gone, and Kakashi stares after her for a moment, before he snorts, walking through the apartment to Mirai’s room, where he finds her playing with some toy animals.

 

He watches her a moment, watches the small brow quirk and a grin spread, while the red eyes start to sparkle.

 

Kakashi grins, too, seeing Asuma for a split second, in the way Mirai holds her head, reaches for a horse. 

He calls out to her, after a moment, just softly. “Hey Mirai, wanna go and show your Dad all those cool toys?”

Mirai blinks up at him, weighing her head, and then concentrating on the horse again, making it gallop through the air. “Dad like horses, too?”

Kakashi hums, squatting down next to her. “I’m not sure. But he sure had a lot more exposure to and chance to pet them when he was one of the active twelve? I know there’s horses there used for service.”

Mirai blinks, making swoosh-sounds while the horse gallops. “He pet them?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “I bet.” He grins, reminiscing for a moment. “He was always calm, big and strong and calm… I bet he was a good horse handler in the daimyo’s service.” He exhales, reaching out to thread his fingers through her black and unruly hair. “I bet they loved him.”

Mirai grins up at him, and then pushes up, picking up all her horses in the process. “Cool. Wanna show him.”

Kakashi chuckles, and picks her up, carefully helping her keep the toys in her hands, while he shifts her onto his arm. “Yeah. Let’s show him.”

 

He blinks, looking at her from short distance, watching her blow up her cheeks for a moment, one horse galloping in front of his face now, and he grins, tightening his grip, and then rushes, and Mirai squeals, happily, making the horse whinny.

 

And if anybody they rush by hears Kakashi whinny, too, well, they must be mistaken.

 

 

Definitely.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

The Hyuuga complex is decorated, solemnly, in pale green, echoing the seal’s color.

 

Kakashi watches Kushina activate the seals on the knife, his pockets stuffed with toy horses, his arms full with a dozing Mirai. 

 

Neji reaches for Karin’s hand, before the knife touches his skin.

Gasps, loudly, when the seal flares, and then… it is gone, and there is a ripple that passes through the attendees, and a murmur, and Kakashi sniffs, watching Neji’s face crumble, and Karin pull him into an embrace.

 

And Hinata smiles, beatifically, with her hands pressed to her chest.

 

Kakashi watches as Naruto pulls her into a half-embrace, mirroring the smile. 

And then goes, to hug Neji, too.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi holds out the box with the bells, feeling weirdly out of body watching Naruto take it. 

He clears his throat. “There you go. For your… cute little genins.”

 

They share a grin, and Kakashi watches the emotions on Naruto’s face as he opens the box, ghosts his fingers over the bells. 

His voice is a breath. “Quite the history attached to these.” He blinks up at Kakashi. “I mean, I don’t really need them… not with this group at least. Yuukimaru, Midori and Yuki are an awesome team.” He shoots a look at Kakashi. “I won’t need the bells with them.”

Kakashi shrugs. “Devise another version of the test then. Or just keep them, as a reminder. They are yours now.”

Naruto ducks his head, and then nods, with a sniff. 

He clears his throat. “So. I have discussed the details for the training mission with Obito, I think we’re all set. The weather is warming once more, with spring around the corner, so we won’t be freezing either.”

Kakashi grunts, leaning back on the desk. “Don’t let Obito have too much fun pretending to be the enemy… he’s rather good at that after all.”

Naruto snorts. “True.” He grins, weighing his head. “But, I mean, he’s the one transporting the food, too, so…”

Kakashi cackles. “You mean he doesn’t stand a chance against you when you’re hungry?”

Naruto’s grin broadens. “Obviously?” They share a quick laugh, and then Naruto shrugs. “I think it’s good that he can get out a bit… I know he is happy, but being confined to a place is never good.”

Kakashi hums. “Yes. And it’s the perfect excuse for us to argue the point.” He clicks his tongue, sobering. “Iruka mentioned that… apparently the white flesh of Obito has a process of… lignification? I… I’m not sure if you can do something about that, at all, or if it is impossible…”

Naruto interjects, tone calm. “I’ll check. Maybe I can reverse the process a bit.” He pulls a face. “That must be quite painful?”

Kakashi nods, grimacing. “Yeah, Iruka said that Obito used to hide out in his dimension till the pain would pass…” He swallows, reaching out to ghost his fingers over Naruto’s face. “I’m just glad that’s not happening with you.” Or Tenzou.

Naruto quirks an eyebrow, pulling a face. “Yeah, me too.” He leans in, pressing their foreheads together for a long moment. “I’ll see what I can do.”

Kakashi exhales. “Thank you.”

 

Naruto nods, opening his mouth, but is interrupted by the door opening, and Shikamaru coming in.

He grimaces. “Sorry, Kakashi-san, your presence was urgently requested at the gate. There is a delegation from Hozuki castle.” Shikamaru hesitates, lifting his eyebrows. “Apparently the boy is a bit sickly. Kahyo has requested that you personally see to it.” He clicks his tongue, tone vaguely annoyed. “Since she is the official liaison and ruler of Hozuki castle…”

Kakashi holds up his hand, with a nod. “It’s fine Shikamaru. Naruto has to leave anyways.” He gives him a quick grin. “Thank you.”

Shikamaru nods, and then leaves, closing the door after himself.

 

Kakashi shrugs. “Guess we need to go.” He leans in, to breathe in deeply, feeling Naruto’s instinctual smile. “Have fun on the mission.”

Naruto hums. “I will.” He presses a kiss to the soft skin under Kakashi’s eye, onto the scar. “Miss you.”

Kakashi whispers. “Miss you, too.”

Naruto smiles, broadly, eyes sparkling, and Kakashi’s heart beats, hard, once, and then he steps back, with an enormous effort. “Off you go.”

 

Naruto chuckles, and then inclines his head, eyes glittering. “Rokudaime.”

 

Kakashi flips him the bird and watches him jump out, laughing loudly.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi stares down at the boy, at the frail little thing wrapped in cloth.

Too small, even he can see that.

 

He quirks an eyebrow at the delegation, and nods towards the hospital, and then follows along, twirling the sealed scroll in his hand.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“So. Wanna go by Orochimaru’s with me later?”

 

Kakashi keeps his eyes on the report he reads, sensing Tenzou pause.

 

Tenzou clicks his tongue. “I thought me indulging in… watching him wasn’t healthy?” Kakashi blinks up and Tenzou shoots him a look, dead-pan. “I’m paraphrasing.”

Kakashi weighs his head, and then leans back, with a sigh. “I still think so, yes. But I need to… go and visit the compound at some time, and I hear Karin has started to work there, properly, I mean. Also, I think this is something Orochimaru expects, and I… want to keep him relaxed.”

Tenzou grunts, non-committally. 

Kakashi hums. “We would be back for dinner.”

Tenzou snorts, and then shakes his head, dark eyes twinkling. “Good. I have foot-massaging duty.”

Kakashi grins, broadly, and then sobers again, slowly, watching Tenzou for a moment. 

His voice is soft. “Not far off now.”

Tenzou quirks an eyebrow. “No, indeed, just a few weeks…” He hesitates, and then shrugs. “It’s very unreal.”

Kakashi nods. “I can imagine.”

Tenzou holds out one hand, stares into the palm of it. “Just yesterday, a foot kicked into my palm. That was so…” He shakes his head.

Kakashi smirks. “Things to look forward to.”

Tenzou nods. “Indeed.” He lowers his hand, and then winks at Kakashi. “And you, planning for the big day already?”

 

Kakashi blinks. “Big day?” He snorts. “Oh, that day.”

Tenzou rolls his eyes. “Yes, that day.” He points at Kakashi with the scroll he’s holding. “Please don’t tell me you don’t know that he’s already planning with the others.”

Kakashi snorts. “No, I know he does. I…” He reaches up, to rub the bridge of his nose. “And I know I should be excited about it, but I…” He shrugs, looking up at Tenzou. “I’m just happy now? Honestly, I wouldn’t need the whole…” He waves his hand.

Tenzou snorts, too. “Very you, Senpai.” He clicks his tongue, tone dry. “No can do though, I know everyone is preparing.”

Kakashi sighs, deeply. 

And then chuckles. “Yeah, well, I…” He shakes his head. “I look forward to it.” He bites his lip for a moment, staring into space. “It just feels mightily unreal.”

Tenzou cackles. “See? That feeling I know.” They share a grin, and Tenzou waves the scroll he’s holding. “I’ll just bring this over to Shikamaru. Pick you up in twenty?”

Kakashi nods. “Sure.”

 

The door closes behind Tenzou with a soft click and Kakashi stares at it, for a moment too long.

And then he bends down, sideways, to touch the floor. “Kuchiyose no Jutsu.”

 

Pakkun puffs into space, looking mightily bored. “Boss?”

Kakashi grimaces. “Sorry, no real mission, just…” He watches Pakkun glower and grimaces. “I’ve kind of neglected you guys, haven’t I.”

The small dog huffs. “You were preoccupied. We understand.”

Kakashi rubs his temple. “Still. I promise I’ll keep an eye on including you in my life if you like?” He tilts his head. “You could also accompany training missions at the academy?”

Pakkun licks his snout. “With Naruto?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “You want to be on his team?”

Pakkun shrugs. “Kurama wants to go onto another run with us.”

Kakashi blinks. “Right.” He frowns. “I remember. How can you know though?” He narrows his eyes. “Have you been popping up without my knowledge again?”

Pakkun literally rolls his eyes. “We haven’t been summoned in months. No missions, nothing. We were bored?”

Kakashi grimaces. “You said.” He hesitates for a long moment, and then reaches out, to scratch Pakkun’s head. “I’ll summon you for that run as soon as Naruto and Kurama are back, alright?”

Pakkun harrumphs. “Alright.” He licks his snout. “And now?”

Kakashi shrugs. “Now I wanted to ask you to go by Jiraiya and ask him to meet me later, for dinner?” 

Pakkun licks his snout. “Sure. Anything else?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “Just tell him that it’s a personal matter. It’s fine if Tsunade wants to come, too.”

“Alright.” Pakkun hesitates, and then moves forward, to press into Kakashi’s shin for a long moment. “Don’t think we’re pissed at you boss. We’re mightily proud of you. We understand.”

Kakashi swallows thickly, reaching down to scratch him again. “I… thank you.”

 

Pakkun nods, and is gone in a puff of smoke, and Kakashi watches after him, and then returns to the report, with a sigh.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“Karin-san, thank you for making the time.”

 

Karin quirks an eyebrow, pushing her glasses up, but Kakashi can see the faint blush, the way the shoulders straighten. 

“Sure. Just please don’t touch any of the samples.”

Tenzou steps over, staring down at said samples with an unreadable expression. “Are mine here as well?”

Karin nods. “Yes.” She points a finger. “Lower left quarter.” She shrugs. “They look fine.”

Kakashi frowns. “Fine?”

Karin steps over, very carefully takes up one of the petri dishes. “No sign of lignification, the cells are stable.”

Tenzou grimaces. “Do they…”

Karin looks at him. “Go through segmentation? Yes.”

Kakashi tilts his head. “Meaning?”

Karin turns to him, after putting the dish back. “Meaning his cells do what cells usually do, and it is likely his abilities will be present in his child as well.”

There is a short pause, as Tenzou stares into space.

Kakashi lightly clicks his tongue. “Do you think that will be a problem?”

Karin lifts her eyebrows. “No, actually? Our abilities are usually transmitted genetically to our kids when we have them, right? Yamato-san is no different here, even though his own creation was different. I would not worry too much.”

 

Kakashi shoots a look at Tenzou, notes the tense shoulders. “Thank you, Karin.”

She reaches up, to push a strand of hair behind her ear, and he blinks, eyes catching on the shimmering rings on her skin. Remembering Kushina had said that she could remove them as well.

He keeps his voice gentle. Stating. “You kept your scars.”

She grimaces, and then looks at her wrist, before looking up, defiantly. “I did.”

They share a long, long look.

 

Kakashi nods. “Alright. Please let me know if there is something you need. Or something he… needs.” He clicks his tongue, vague humor entering his voice. “Actually definitely let me know if he needs something.” They share a low chuckle, and then Karin nods, with a quick quirk of her eyebrows. “Sure.”

Kakashi turns away, watching Tenzou hesitate from the corner of his eyes. 

He smirks softly to himself, gesticulating at the door. “I’ll wait outside.”

Tenzou’s head comes up, his mouth opening in protest, but Kakashi holds up his hand. “Easy. There is nothing to worry about here.” Except him, of course. He looks back at Karin. “Right?”

Karin smirks at him. “Right.”

 

Kakashi nods, and then walks out, taking his time, taking in the complex.

It is quiet, almost eerily quiet, the large halls and offices deserted, only some of them lighted.

Kakashi frowns, wondering at the subterranean implementation, the dungeon-like setup.

 

He throws his question over his shoulder, without heat. “I was just wondering why you always build your…” hideouts “dwellings into the ground.”

A whisper of cloth and Orochimaru steps up, the long black hair shifting almost hypnotically.

He shrugs. “I like the sense of shelter for myself and my experiments. No prying eyes…” Orochimaru grins, the long tongue snaking out for a moment. “Of course that only applied to the status before Karin came back to work here.”

Kakashi hums, turning to face him. “She is not a spy, it is her wish to be here.” 

The snake-like Sannin tilts his head. “She says she will act as a liaison.”

Kakashi lifts an eyebrow. “Isn’t that practical though? We won’t get into your hair…” He trails off meaningfully, with a click of his tongue.

Orochimaru grins. “Indeed.” He narrows his eyes, with a hum, the green eyes glittering. 

Voice suddenly hard. “He hasn’t been by.”

Kakashi blinks, working his jaw for a moment. “That is not my call to make.”

Orochimaru glowers at him, silently.

Kakashi hums, and then shrugs, deliberately lightly. “I can ask though.”

The tongue comes out again, for a moment. “And I would appreciate it.” Orochimaru is silent for a beat, and then adds, tone sly. “I could offer medical insights that would not reach Naruto’s or even Tsunade’s ears…”

Kakashi inhales, deeply, wondering once more just how much Orochimaru really knows. 

And from where he might have his insights.

 

He shrugs. “I cannot force Jiraiya to come by, and even if I could, I would not. As I said, I’ll ask him.”

Orochimaru’s dark eyebrows twitch.

His voice is just the tiniest bit sardonic. “Isn’t it fun though, to have all three Sannin back, in Konoha…”

Tenzou interjects, tone hard. “You’re not in Konoha, and we would appreciate it if you wouldn’t plan to come by either.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, watching Orochimaru turn to Tenzou.

And then watches in fascination as the white, beautiful face softens. 

 

The tongue snakes out again. “Ah, my child.”

Tenzou hisses. “I am not your child.”

Orochimaru grins, broadly, but Kakashi has the distinct impression that it is forced, a mask.

He shifts to his other foot.

 

Orochimaru sighs, and then shrugs, genially. “Yamato-san then, isn’t it. These days at least.”

Tenzou glowers at him.

Orochimaru hums, stepping away from Kakashi slowly, and then leaning against the wall, the very picture of relaxation. “You are often outside, watching.”

Kakashi blinks, looking at Tenzou, noting the involuntary twitches that pass his face.

Tenzou’s tone is harsh. “So what.”

Orochimaru clicks his tongue, and then pushes up from the wall again, starting down the hallway in slow, measured steps. “There is always a hot tea for you, Yamato-san. No need to stay outside in the rain. You’ll only catch a cold, and your child needs a healthy father.”

A whisper of cloth and he is gone, and Kakashi exhales, watching Tenzou closely.

Watching him curse, under his breath.

 

Tenzou’s voice is caustic. And heavily sardonic. “I bet there’s lots and lots of little snakes in Konoha, everywhere. Keeping him so well informed.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he grins. “Probably.”

Tenzou shoots him a look, obviously hearing something in his tone. “Do you think that is funny?” He blinks, belatedly adding: “Senpai.”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, curbing his mirth. He tilts his head towards the entrance, starts to walk slowly, knowing Tenzou will follow. “Just the mental image.”

Tenzou grumbles something, under his breath.

Kakashi shoots him a look. “No, but really. If that were the case we would have lots and lots of reports of cats coming home with snakes, don’t you think?” He shrugs. “I mean, I do not actually doubt that he has his spies in Konoha…” He sighs, shrugging again. “But then we didn’t expect anything else, did we.”

Tenzou pulls a face.

He spits the words out. “He called me child.”

 

Kakashi grimaces a bit. “I was talking to Kushina about that.”

Tenzou’s head whips around. “You did?”

Kakashi nods, with a sigh. “Yes, she said that… there are always layers to all the decisions that Orochimaru makes.” He weighs his head. “In short and paraphrasing here, but… you were one of the children he experimented on back then. And he tried to get you back.”

Tenzou stares at him, nonplussed.

 

And then turns, on his heel, stalking towards the entrance. “I’m not listening to this.”

This time the word is added with heat. “Senpai.”

 

Kakashi nods, and then follows him, wondering whether he should apologize, but he doesn’t, watching Tenzou’s stiff shoulders silently, until they are both outside again.

 

Tenzou stops, surveying the area, and then turns abruptly. 

His voice is hard. “I just cannot believe you’d side with him.”

Kakashi lifts his eyebrows. “I am not siding with him.”

Tenzou looks away for a moment, swallowing compulsively. 

His eyes are hard when he looks back. “But?”

 

Kakashi sighs, reaching up to rub the bridge of his nose. “But…” The fact remains. He sighs, soundlessly. “But even Orochimaru is human, in the end. And though we cannot kill him… Time will. He will die, eventually.”

Tenzou pulls a face. “So?”

Kakashi blinks, softly. “The wish to see parts of ourselves being passed on is built into our DNA. The need for connection also.”

Tenzou is silent for a long moment.

He swallows. “What you’re saying is that even he…” He swallows again, tone gravelly. “Even he could not, cannot help feel?”

Kakashi weighs his head. “In a way?” He rubs his temple. “I’m not trying to excuse his deeds here, you know that. But…” He trails off.

Tenzou shakes his head, once.

 

And then laughs, bitterly. “He did call me child.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. Wisely staying silent.

 

And then follows Tenzou back to Konoha, not another word uttered till they reach the gates.

 

Tenzou stops, an inch before the actual gate.

He turns, to look at Kakashi. “It’s just… it makes it seem almost too easy, too logical, you know? Almost warm. And that’s abhorrent.”

Kakashi smirks, wryly, feeling very tired. “I know.”

Tenzou nods, with a sniff.

 

Kakashi reaches up, to squeeze his shoulder. “Go home. Hug Aiko and Yugao.” He hesitates, and then adds, softly. “Put your hand there to be kicked again.”

Tenzou snorts, helplessly, and then nods. 

 

Inhaling, deeply. 

Exhaling, in a rush. “Yes, Senpai.”

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Jiraiya hesitates, and then sighs, deeply. “Yes, I do know, I should visit him.” He grunts. “Probably.” He shrugs. “I mean, I wanted to, but…”

Kakashi shoots him a look. “But?”

Tsunade interjects, calmly, watching them both from the other side of the table. “But we’re not in the mood for his sharp tongue in regards to… us.” She shrugs.

Kakashi frowns, watching the meat on the barbecue grill sizzle for a moment, while he tries to not react outwardly to the statement. I see. Ahhhh, I’m so happy for you?

He clicks his tongue. “I think he only wants to reconnect. And he’s actually keeping to the rules we set…” He snorts. “To be honest, a part of me expected him to show up here?”

Jiraiya cackles. “Yeah.” He hesitates, and then sighs, with a look at Tsunade. “Tomorrow?”

Tsunade glowers at him for a moment, and then her eyes soften, and she shrugs. “Alright.”

 

Kakashi hums. “The Sannin, back in Konoha.” Power, condensed.

Tsunade waggles her eyebrows. “Indeed.” They share a long look.

Kakashi clears his throat. “So. Do I need to be afraid?”

Jiraiya smacks his lips, while reaching for his meat. “Always…” He grins over at Kakashi. “In regards to what though?”

Kakashi mock-glowers at him. “You know. Our wedding?”

Tsunade snickers. “Oh, that… very.”

Kakashi sighs, soundlessly. “You’re not gonna tell.”

Jiraiya pats his back, none-too-gently, tone dry but underlaid with a chuckle. “Of course not.”

 

Tsunade grins. “When is he coming back?”

Kakashi lifts his glass, with a pout. “Tomorrow?”

Jiraiya tilts his head, watching him amusedly.

Kakashi shrugs. “It’s… not as bad as I actually anticipated. I…” He shrugs again, eyes unseeing for a moment. “I mean, this must be the way it is for other bonded that have… like, accepted the bond and the promise of it and all?” He refocuses on Tsunade’s hazel eyes, glad when they stay soft, no pain in them he triggers. “Just trusting, and… knowing you can trust?”

Tsunade smirks at him, softly. “I’m still surprised you haven’t flashed over.”

Kakashi fidgets a bit, and then sighs. “I have thought about it.”

Tsunade snickers.

 

Jiraiya hums, chewing, and then speaks after swallowing the meat down with obvious delight. “So. I heard you kind of got a child the other day?”

Kakashi snorts, lifting his eyebrows. “Well, I was asked to take care of him, yes.” He hesitates. “I’m… just…” He trails off.

Jiraiya turns his head, to look at him. “You are refusing the request?”

Kakashi inhales deeply, and then leans back, twiddling his sticks for a moment before he puts them down. “I am… honored by it. But I…”

Tsunade hums. “You want to experience having a child with Naruto.”

Kakashi grimaces. “Am I being an asshole here?”

Jiraiya chortles. “No?”

Kakashi rubs a hand over his face. “I feel like I am though. I mean…” He lowers his hand, staring unseeing at the ceiling. “The boy is very cute, and so, so small, and fragile… he needs a home, desperately.”

Tsunade frowns a bit. “But he has a home?”

Kakashi presses his lips together, weighing his head. “I guess?”

Jiraiya puts his own sticks down to turn to him, pulling his right leg up in the process.

He shrugs, tone almost hard. “Kakashi, the wish of the mother for you to take him already likely stems from he fact that the boy is not well. She would rather let him go than risk seeing him die, which is… a hard decision, and she’s clinging to her knowledge of your integrity for it.” 

Kakashi grimaces. 

Jiraiya lifts his eyebrows, continuing a bit more gently. “Find a good family for the boy. Make sure he’s strong enough before you send him back to her - and send that family with him, to her, for a while. Make it a family for the boy.”

Tsunade nods. “I think that was your intention all along, wasn’t it?”

Kakashi nods, and then shrugs. “Yes. It’s just…”

Tsunade quirks an eyebrow.

Kakashi sighs. “I’m literally sending them to prison with him.”

Jiraiya snorts. “So change that prison.”

Kakashi glowers at him. “Whether we like it or not, we do need a prison, and you know that.”

Jiraiya hums, reaching for his glass, watching Kakashi with glittering eyes. “But if it would be a place that would minimize aggression… minimize hate… wouldn’t that help?”

Kakashi blinks, sharing a quick look with Tsunade. “What are you suggesting?”

Jiraiya smirks, tilting his head to look at Tsunade. “Make it a… farm.”

 

Kakashi blinks, very slowly. Echoing. “A farm.”

Tsunade narrows her eyes, staring at Jiraiya. “Like… one for producing food?”

Jiraiya waves a hand. “No, more… I guess you’d call it a ranch? Animals, you know? Smaller ones, but big enough to… cuddle?”

Kakashi blinks. 

Jiraiya winks at him. “You really want to tell me that your pack hasn’t helped you through rough times? Hasn’t brightened your days?”

Kakashi opens his mouth, and then shrugs. “No, I mean… sure?” He narrows his eyes. “You really think adding animals to the mix would… help?”

Jiraiya empties his glass, smacking his lips. “I know they would.” He turns back to his plate, reaching for his sticks. “Cute things break our self-imposed cages. Since the prisoners there may not break out of the prison itself, it would them good to experience… those gentler emotions.” He grins at Kakashi. “That plush broke you back then.”

Kakashi glowers at him.

Jiraiya leans in a bit, grinning. “It’s true though. You were forced to think about Naruto cuddling with you, and eventually…” He trails off, grinning fiendishly.

Kakashi grumbles, under his breath, words even he could not decipher.

Tsunade snickers. 

 

Kakashi turns his head, works his jaw for a moment. “Oh, I see… it’s something like that, isn’t it.”

Tsunade lifts her eyebrows, innocently. “Like that?”

Kakashi groans. “Something cute, and seemingly harmless, that will nonetheless have a huge impact.”

Tsunade cackles. “You know us too well.” She shares a quick look with Jiraiya, before smirking at Kakashi. “You’ll love it.”

Kakashi watches in fascination as Jiraiya’s face softens, vulnerability bleeding in.

Jiraiya’s voice is rough. “Yes. You will.”

Kakashi blinks. But?

Jiraiya reaches out, to clasp his neck for a long moment, the dark eyes surprisingly wistful. “Promise.”

Kakashi searches his eyes, frowning, the sudden gravity tugging at something deep within him.

He swallows past the constriction in his throat. “Alright.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

It’s late already, and the moonlight is soft, a relief now that Kakashi has turned the lamps off.

 

 

 

There’s a spice in the air, making it breathable again.

 

 

 

Kakashi smirks softly, his stomach churning.

 

He speaks into the semi-dark, grinning broadly. “You know that you cannot hide from me… sorry.” I can feel you pulsing deep inside my soul.

Naruto’s chuckle is breathless, shivering across Kakashi’s skin. “I don’t mean to?”

Kakashi hums, lazily pushing the scrolls on his desk over to the side. “Oh?”

There’s a glow now, over to the side. And it’s red.

Kakashi licks his lips, swallowing. His pulse picks up, his palms sweaty.

 

Arousal twists, deep within him.

 

Movement, faster than he can see, and then a hand in his neck, pressing him down.

Kakashi rears up, surprising himself, bucking up and throwing his head back, the sharp pain as it connects with Naruto’s chin echoing through him. 

He throws his right arm back… and a hand like a claw locks around his wrist, and then slams it onto the desk. 

Weight settles onto his back, pressing down.

Kakashi grunts, pushing up with his left hand, panting harshly.

His muscles burn with the sudden exertion of pushing back, of holding his ground, and the feral grin, that is etched onto his face.

 

Naruto shoves his legs apart, with one foot.

 

Kakashi tries to close them again, leading to another shuffle that results in Naruto pressing him down, with force now, glowing chakra hands spreading his limbs, unrelentingly. 

Kakashi’s arm collapses, while his breath is loud now, harsh in the low light.

 

For a moment he wonders if their struggle can be seen from the outside.

 

 

 

Naruto finds his neck and bites it, and all thoughts flee.

 

 

 

Reality throbs, into pulsing heartbeats, shuddering into surreality.

 

Dark light, behind his eyelids.

White-hot fire, and warmth, running down his back. 

 

The hand that holds his wrist lets go, snakes up his arm and around his neck.

 

A hand between his legs, rubbing him, through his pants.

Pressing, and rubbing.

The arm around his neck tightens.

 

Oxygen is hard to come by.

 

Kakashi is so hard it hurts.

He can feel Naruto is, too.

 

He can feel the heaving breaths of him, pressing into him from where Naruto is laid out over his back. The edge of the desk is pressing into Kakashi’s hips, viciously.

The pain of the edge is comforting, keeping the arousal in stark contrast.

Kakashi knows it will offset the pushes beautifully, later.

 

Naruto shifts, just slightly, whispers the growl into Kakashi’s ear. “Sorry, Hokage-sama…”

Kakashi grunts, with a frown, but before he can press the words out cloth rips, and he gasps, his pants ripped apart, the sharp nail making short work of his underwear as well, exposing his ass.

Naruto sounds bothered, but also decidedly lewd, while his fingernail scratches along Kakashi’s perineum. “You know, I would love it if you wore those robes… and nothing else. You know? So I could come in, lift them up, fuck you till you scream, and then just drop them, and let you continue, as if nothing happened.” 

Kakashi grunts, a shiver of wild lust rushing through him, making him light-headed. 

He presses the words out, against the muscles pressing into his skin. “Too messy.”

Naruto chuckles, almost darkly. “Not if I plug you.”

 

Kakashi mewls, eyes squeezed shut, feeling himself leaking.

Naruto hums, happily, and then licks into Kakashi’s ear, making him jerk. “You’d be always wet then, too. Always… ready…”

Kakashi swallows, his throat clicking, raw from his panted breaths. “Naruto…”

Naruto sets his teeth too Kakashi’s earlobe, bite down, worrying it until Kakashi gasps. 

Kakashi can feel him grin.

“I would put a cock ring on you… drive you insane with lust.” He pulls Kakashi up a bit with the arm around his neck, and Kakashi follows the pressure, arches his back.

 

Shifts his hips.

 

His cock presses against that edge now, too, still caught in what remains of his clothes.

Naruto reaches for it, draws pointed fingernails down the soft skin. Spreads the precome over the head, gently.

Kakashi erupts into goosebumps, all over.

Naruto’s grin is evident in his voice. “Then again, you’re wet for me already, aren’t you… and so tight. Lets make you relax, hmmm?”

Kakashi gasps, unable to form a single thought, the edges of his vision pulling in as Naruto tightens his arm, just the tiniest bit more.

The very core of Kakashi pulses, tightens.

 

It doesn’t take much. 

 

Naruto caresses him, in a steady, much too gentle way, that makes the orgasm break almost leisurely, in a drawn-out, sweet way that wants to voice itself in a scream… a scream that is kept in Kakashi’s throat by the arm that silences him. By the weight that keeps him.

 

It’s pure somehow.

 

Pure in a way that cuts, deep into him. In him. 

Cuts the last doubts away.

 

He lets himself fall, knowing Naruto will catch him.

 

 

Time, there, and yet not.

 

 

 

He can feel Naruto catch his come, while gritting his teeth against the darkness that wants to follow. Against the way his knees buckle.

 

The darkness is pulsing, still. Again.

 

Naruto hums, and then pushes Kakashi’s come into him, with two fingers. Gently.

 

Kakashi’s fingers cramp on the desk.

 

 

Naruto pushes up, slowly. Releases Kakashi’s throat, the hand traveling around to press into his back, keeping him down.

Pushes Kakashi’s feet apart even further, slowly.

 

Kakashi inhales deeply, coughing a bit.

 

Naruto shushes him, the hand pressing a bit more, while the other grips his left hip. “Shhhhhhhh. Easy.” He clicks his tongue, and Kakashi can hear the grin in his voice. “No seal this time. Quiet, darling.”

Kakashi shivers, sending a somewhat panicked look to the door. “Naruto…”

The hand on his back moves up, presses his head down. “Uh uh, shhhh.” It glides down again, to press into his back again. “This really is the perfect angle…”

Kakashi shivers, spread out and open, knowing how he must look.

He can feel the heat of Naruto’s cock.

 

He grits his teeth, bracing.

 

Naruto chuckles, breathlessly.

Asking. “Slow? Or hard.”

 

Kakashi blinks, swallowing compulsively. 

Quiet or loud, is what Naruto means.

 

Kakashi knows he should ask for slow.

But by god, he wants hard.

 

He shivers, his voice pressed, eyes unfocused on the desk beneath him. “All the kids are at home, are they not?”

Naruto snickers, and then rewards him for the answer, with a slap to his ass. “Oh yessss.”

Kakashi grunts, feeling the shudders of that slap travel through him, all the way up to his throat.

Knowing what else he’ll feel there in a moment, too.

 

He licks his lips. “Shikamaru will survive.”

 

Naruto giggles, and then leans forward, to press a kiss to Kakashi’s neck, before pushing up again. 

He sounds decidedly chipper, almost disgustingly delighted. “Alrighty then.”

Kakashi snorts. 

Naruto clicks his tongue. “You better hold onto the edge of the desk, honey.”

 

Oh god.

 

 

Kakashi shivers and then does at he is told, pushing his hands to the edge, fingers tightening on the edge.

Naruto hums, and then shifts a bit, thumbs spreading Kakashi’s cheeks.

It would be embarrassing, really, but Kakashi is too high again already, needing this with the single-minded focus of an addict, craving his fix.

He blinks, undulating just a bit, with a mewl. Asking, silently.

 

Naruto’s voice is gravelly. “Gonna be so good.”

Kakashi licks his lips, pressing the words out, shivering. “Yeah? When.”

Naruto snickers.

 

And then aligns, and Kakashi can feel the heat, and the pressure, just a bit, the head catching, and he grunts, feeling Naruto’s hands tighten.

Pull him up and off the desk, just the tiniest bit.

 

White-hot steel, splitting him open, relentlessly.

Taking his mind, and his sight, and his voice. His breath.

His awareness, and feeling, anything outside of it and it’s glide, deep into him.

 

 

That feeling of base self-abandonment, paired with vicious lust, and the truth of coming home.

 

 

It’s always like this.

No matter how often they’ve done this before.

No matter how often Naruto just fucks him through the mattress in the mornings.

How often he pulses, deep within Kakashi.

 

Kakashi gasps for breath.

And then for more.

 

Always.

 

 

He does so now, and Naruto chuckles, definitely pressed, and then shifts his stance, holding sheathed deep. He feels huge, so huge, and burning.

Kakashi’s tattoo pulses, in time with his heart.

 

He tries to brace, to no use.

 

Naruto pulls out, and then slams back into him, just short of brutal.

Stars explode behind Kakashi’s eyes, against his eyelids.

He can feel him in his throat.

 

Naruto exhales, and then sets a rhythm, that destroys Kakashi’s mind.

 

It’s hard, and fast, and glorious.

Precise, and giving, just as much as it is obviously taking, Naruto’s moans and curses loud in the room.

 

The desk rattles, making it obvious to anybody within the building.

 

Pleasure builds, around the way he is plundered.

Around the edge of pain that is used so masterfully.

 

His hips slap against the edge, on every thrust.

Kakashi grits his teeth around the scream.

 

His body tenses, unable not to break under the assault, the pressure so intense he feels like fainting. Just a bit more. Just a bit.

 

Naruto slows down suddenly, holding, thrusts minimal now, and it’s torture, and brilliant, and Kakashi trashes, trying to move his hips, but they’re kept in an iron grip, and he pushes up, wild now, pushing his strength into it, to no avail, and Naruto hums, sweat dripping onto him, and then… grows. 

Just a bit.

 

And Kakashi holds, almost shell-shocked, pushed up and bent under him, and into him, held in place by what feels like… Kakashi has no words.

He opens his mouth in a silent scream, and then feels a pulse.

 

A pulse, directed at the gland, under that gloriously huge, brilliantly torturing cock.

 

He jerks, as if slapped.

Naruto laughs, delightedly. Breathlessly. 

 

And does it again.

Of course.

 

Kakashi crashes down, his limbs unable to hold him.

The desk is cold against his cheek.

 

He can feel his orgasm gather, suspended on his body trying to clench around the unrelenting pressure, the feeling so intense he can taste it.

 

Naruto hums, breathing harshly, and then leans forward, gliding even deeper.

Kakashi opens his mouth, in a silent scream.

 

Naruto whispers against the crown of his head, into the sweaty hair. 

With another pulse. “Come for me, darling.”

 

 

Pleasure breaks, unrelentingly, around heat, and pressure, and claws, pressing into his hip bones.

Bliss, fleeting, riding the edge of pain, and overstimulation.

 

And darkness comes, when he feels Naruto smiles against his skin.

Drags him under when Kakashi can feel Naruto come, filling him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

They’re on the couch when he comes back to himself, naked, and under a blanket.

 

Kakashi blinks, and then turns in Naruto’s arms, taking care not to fall off the sofa in the process.

 

Naruto beams at him, eyes blue and gentle and mischievous. “Hey there, sleepy-head.”

Kakashi swallows, with a hum, and then just nestles in, with a sigh, pushing his nose up under Naruto’s jaw. 

He asks around a yawn. “How long was I out?”

Naruto starts to stroke his back, gently, while embracing him a bit more tightly. “A while. An hour maybe? I didn’t really check.” He presses a kiss to Kakashi’s head. “Sorry if I surprised you there. I’ve been wanting to try that for a while.”

Kakashi snorts. Quirking an eyebrow. “Honestly, no idea why I was surprised. I mean, I do know you can modify your body…”

He can her the grin in Naruto’s voice. “Liked it?”

Kakashi hums, pretending to think about it. “Maybe?” Like might be an understatement.

Naruto snickers.

Kakashi grins, and then sobers a bit. “You do realize that you are more than enough for me in your… original state, right?”

Naruto hums, and then presses another kiss to his head. “I know. But I also like to play around, and, I mean, I can… you know?” He shrugs, just softly. “So. Anything you’d like to try out I guess.”

He draws back a bit, to look at him. “By the way, I pushed a bit of healing chakra into my… errr.. come, so I hope you’re all healed.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, nestling back in. Guess you tore me open? “Well, I’m not in pain, so I guess?”

Naruto exhales, softly. “Good.”

Kakashi hums, pressing a kiss to the skin. “Anything you want, too…”

Naruto undulates a bit, and Kakashi can feel his refilling erection against his thigh. “Well, I mean, I really wanted that, so… yeah?” He snickers.

Kakashi pokes him mock-admonishingly into his side. “Ass.”

Naruto wriggles a bit, while tickling Kakashi just slightly. “You love it.”

Kakashi grins. “I do.”

 

Naruto clicks his tongue. “So. That desk fantasy. Did I pass?”

Kakashi snorts, and then says, with feeling. “Oh yes.” That and more.

Naruto nods, once, and then rubs his face over Kakashi’s head, before relaxing a bit more. “Good.”

Kakashi exhales, deeply touched by the question and the care behind it, and then relaxes, too, drawing in the smell of summer, and love, and him, in big lungfuls that he knows he’ll never tire of.

He whispers against Naruto’s skin. “We should probably lock the door.”

 

Naruto snorts, and then waves one hand, before placing it back onto Kakashi’s skin. “Oh, no need. Shika has been by already. He’s gonna bring us new uniforms in the morning.”

Kakashi freezes for a long moment, and then tries to speak past the rush of mortification that runs through him, opting for humor. “Oh, I see. I wonder if he wants to rediscuss his salary.”

Naruto laughs out loud, ending in a snicker, and he presses another kiss to Kakashi’s head, and suddenly it doesn’t matter anymore, and Kakashi lets it go, with a sigh.

 

Cuddling and sleeping in the arms of his beloved.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“So I hear you found a family for that little boy.”

 

Kakashi nods, leaning back in his chair, looking up at Kurenai. “Yes. I… I just couldn’t take him. Not as she requested. I…” He trails off, with a shrug.

Kurenai hums. “Understandable?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “I do hope she’ll understand. They’ll go and live with her and the baby until he is of age to join the academy, if that is something she wishes. And then… we’ll see.”

Kurenai nods. “A good compromise. It wasn’t particularly fair to put you in this position.”

Kakashi grimaces. “I cannot blame her. We… share a connection.” He shrugs. “In another world, there might have been more to it. Here, now… my path is different.”

Kurenai grins, waggling her eyebrows. “And well-known.”

 

Kakashi sighs, deeply. “What now?”

Kurenai snickers, reaching for her tea. “Nothing?”

Kakashi glowers at her.

Kurenai rolls her eyes, voice suffused with laughter. “Just that the fact that Shikamaru dropped off dirty uniforms that were obviously not his sparked a lot of… speculations.”

Kakashi snorts, and then rubs the bride of his nose, trying to be pissed. And failing, by a mile. “I see.”

Kurenai grins at him, broadly now. “That good, huh.”

Kakashi shakes his head, and then looks up at the ceiling, trying not to blush. “Yes?”

Kurenai smirks at him, very saucily. “Good.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Sasuke yawns, belatedly holding up his hand to hide it, and Kakashi tries not to react, mightily amused. He shares a look with Minato, whose corner of his eyes crinkle as well, before addressing the obviously bone-tired ninja, keeping his voice light.

“So. Feeling a bit under the weather?”

Sasuke grunts, and then shrugs, looking up at him. “Just… Hanabi is busy learning during the days, I’m on missions. We spend the nights talking and…” He looks away, blushing and clearing his throat, before looking back, almost panicked. “Not that.” He shrugs. “But… you know.”

Kakashi nods, with a hum. “Yeah. I know.” He winks at Sasuke, before sharing another look with Minato. “And yet you want to do a course at the academy as well? Wouldn’t that be like… too much?”

Sasuke shrugs. “I figure better now than never? I mean I have a few years, right. And I… wish to explore the rinnegan properly. That requires research, too. Which is something that Hanabi and I have talked about, too. And I have spoken to Jiraiya. And Naruto. Supposedly the rinnegan has a lot of powers. I have hardly touched them.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Yes. I mean we know that Nagato used a reviving jutsu. And the push and pull it can do was thoroughly documented.” He frowns. “I saw you transport across distance with it, too.”

Sasuke nods. “Yes. Hanabi thinks that it probably can cross temporal thresholds, too.”

Kakashi fidgets, sharing another long look with Minato, who gazes back solemnly. “She does?”

 

Sasuke clicks his tongue, voice carrying vague humor. “Yes. She said that once I had control of its powers that I should go and take our future kids on a trip to show them the old Konoha, since so much has changed already.” He grins. “You know, immersive history lessons.”

 

 

Kakashi blinks.

Time seems to slow, trickle.

 

 

It’s like ice, in his veins.

 

 

 

Kakashi‘s heart skips a beat. 

Minato’s eyes find his, as if in slow motion, huge, and aware. 

 

 

 

And there is a single thought.

 

 

 

 

 

Fuck. 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 61: Spit image

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

“Can I take Kurama out for a run?”

 

Naruto’s head comes up, from where he is sitting at his desk, over scrolls and papers, the blue eyes blinking once, slowly. “Alone?”

Kakashi shrugs, a show of relaxation on the couch. “Yeah. I mean, you have to prepare the tests, right, and I need to move a bit, and…” I need to talk to him.

Naruto blinks again, and then pulls a face, leaning back in his chair with a sigh, rubbing his face. “I guess?”

Kakashi pastes a smile on. “Pakkun would love it?”

He figures all things considered he is doing well.

 

Naruto spreads his fingers, slowly, watching him through them.

Kakashi grimaces, just a bit. Fuck.

Naruto narrows his eyes. “What.”

Kakashi sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. Evading. “Nothing concrete yet.”

Naruto lowers his hands, expression focused now, alert. “Concrete?”

Kakashi licks his lips, shakes his head once. “Just a hunch, Naruto. I…” He shrugs. “I need to run it by Kurama.”

Naruto frowns, watching him, tone carefully neutral. “And not me.”

Kakashi swallows. “You, later.” He lifts his eyebrows. “Promise.”

Naruto works his jaw for a long moment, before sniffing. “There have been too many secrets between us already. You know that.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long, long moment. “I know.” He exhales, while trying to stay steadfast, remembering Minato’s warning not to raise awareness just yet. “And I will not keep this from you, darling.” A small smile flits over Naruto’s face, instinctual and unable to be contained, and Kakashi echoes it, his voice softening, infused with some humor now. “But I would love to know what I am actually talking about before doing so.”

Naruto snorts, and then shakes his head, before rubbing his face again. 

He sighs, and then reaches for the big cup in front of him, waving it at Kakashi. “Only if you go and get me another coffee?”

Kakashi chuckles, and then stands up, stepping over to bend down and kiss Naruto, just like that, his gut vibrating. “Of course.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“YONDAIME.”

 

Kurama narrows his eyes, turning his head from Minato who had opened the door for him, to shoot Kakashi a look from red eyes. “DO WE GET TO RUN, OR ARE WE ONLY GOING TO TALK.”

Kakashi rubs his forehead, while drily letting the realization go that Naruto, probably out of spite, had let Kurama out somewhere in the tower, and then had sent him up to Kakashi’s office - alone. 

Though, he’s not hearing any screaming, so there’s that.

 

He sighs. “Both?”

Minato steps up, voice gentle. “Both would be good, wouldn’t it.”

Kurama glowers at him, silently, for a long moment, before answering. “SURE. OR MAYBE A RUN FIRST, TO GET RID OF BAD MEMORIES.” There is an edge to his voice.

Kakashi presses his lips together for a moment, and then gesticulates towards the window. “My pack is waiting at the front gates. Want to jump over the roofs with us, or…” He trails off.

Kurama levels him with a rather sardonic gaze. “NO CARRYING AROUND.”

Minato quirks an eyebrow. “Only Naruto may do that?” He shares a quick grin with Kakashi as Kurama simply turns and hops out the window, and Kakashi sighs, jumping out after them.

Exhaling, in a rush, and resigning himself to run, first.

 

And talk, later.

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

“Better?”

 

Kurama huffs, shifting a bit, laying on his side on the grass, with Kakashi’s pack all around. Minato is on Kakashi’s other side, panting deeply. “A BIT.”

Minato speaks up, voice quiet, not beating around the bush. “I apologize for not spending more time on our history. But… We think there has been a change of plans.”

Kurama’s dark eyes sparkle. “CHANGE?”

Kakashi nods, wiping at his forehead. “Yes, but more a change in our perception of things.”

He grimaces, sharing a long look with Minato, before turning to Kurama again. “We have come to the realization that it might not take as much time as we… thought, before they arrive.”

Kurama narrows his eyes, but waits, watching Kakashi.

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “That doesn’t surprise you.”

Kurama scoffs. “NO. YOUR RELIANCE ON SAID TIMEFRAME IS A HALF REMEMBERED MEMORY THAT CONTAINED NO SPECIFIC MARKERS.” Kurama licks his snout. “THE UNIVERSE MAY BE VAST, BUT LIGHT TRAVELS FAST.”

Kakashi frowns. “Light?”

Kurama’s tails swish. “DON’T YOU SEE THE GLOW?”

Kakashi’s mouth is dry. “What glow.”

Kurama’s red ice are cold, watching him. “HER GLOW. IT MUST BE BEYOND YOUR VISUAL RANGE.”

Minato speaks up, sitting up slowly. “Kaguya’s glow?”

Kurama’s eyes swivel to him. “YES. SHE EMITS LIGHT.”

Kakashi groans. “The signal that they were able to measure.” And it traveled even faster than we thought.

Kurama hums. “YES.” He hesitates, and then adds, with a yawn. “I THINK I SHOULD PRACTICE THE BARYON MODE WITH NARUTO NOW.”

Minato clears his throat. “Yes. And we need to travel to Amegakure, to the ruins there.”

Kakashi nods. “Maybe Jiraiya can accompany that team. And Karin should go, too.”

Kurama sighs, and then turns to his back, watching the sky for a long moment.

Kakashi reaches for his bottle, takes a sip of water.

 

Kurama speaks up, just in the moment Kakashi thinks he’s dozed off. “SO ROKUDAIME, HAVE YOU EJACULATED FOR HINATA YET.”

Kakashi chokes, coughing wildly around his sip of water, while Minato reaches up after a moment, to clap his back, very drily. “And they said tailed beasts had no mind of their own. No humor.” He quirks an eyebrow at Kurama, with a sly little smile, tone dry as the desert. “What fools they were.”

Kurama winks at him, chortling quietly to himself.

Kakashi tries to breathe. “What, why sho….” He coughs again, and then continues, tone a bit tight. “Hinata wants to have my semen?”

Kurama undulates, snarling in a wide grin, while Pakkun snickers. “Well, don’t you share eggs and semen with her and her bonded?”

Kakashi splutters a bit. “Yeah, but Naruto’s semen, and Naruto wanted to do that and extract and…” He trails off, feeling like sinking into the ground. 

Kurama snickers. “WELL, I BELIEVE THEY ARE READY. I HOPE YOU ARE, TOO.”

Kakashi stares at Kurama, and then at Minato, mind a flatline. “But, I mean, with what we know…” Or suspect. He trails off.

Minato’s voice is soft. “Does it matter?”

Kakashi blinks, and then looks over to him, remembering.

His voice is a whisper. “Does it?”

 

And Minato smiles, broadly, beatifically, viciously painful. “No.”

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

“So. Kurama says you talked. And that I should train that new mode.”

 

Kakashi grimaces, shifting a bit to press his cheek onto Naruto’s chest, listening to the steady heartbeat. “I… think that might be wise, yes.”

Naruto hums. “Kurama says you think they’re going to be here soon.”

Kakashi shivers, and then sits up, uncaring of the messy state their bodies are in. 

He draws his legs up, locking his arms around them, watching Naruto look up at him, looking beautifully tousled and spent. 

He clicks his tongue. “Sasuke made an offhand comment the other day. Both your Dad and I… had this moment where we thought…” He trails off.

Naruto frowns, one hand coming up to rub soothingly along Kakashi’s shin. “A premonition?”

Kakashi shrugs, shaking his head. “I don’t know. I just…”

Naruto grimaces a bit. “You don’t want to risk it.”

Kakashi blinks, very slowly, feeling tired suddenly. “I cannot risk it. I…” He shrugs again.

Naruto hums, and then smirks at him, waggling his eyebrows. “See, that’s why I love you so.”

Kakashi grunts, and then lowers his head to his knees, speaking into the space between them and his body, while staring unseeing at nothing. “Kurama said you and Hinata were… ready.”

The thumb stroking his skin pauses, and then continues its ministrations, Naruto’s voice surprisingly neutral. “Tenten will carry our children, while Hinata will carry theirs, yes.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, a shiver running down his spine. “I see.”

 

There is a pause, and then Naruto sits up, shifting so he can embrace Kakashi from his right side, one leg pushing through under Kakashi’s knees, the other pressing into his back.

Naruto’s arms pull Kakashi in. “I know you feel it, too.”

Kakashi hums, turning his face up and sideways, to press his nose up under Naruto’s jaw. “I do. It’s a necessity.” And I want it, with you.

Naruto swallows, his Adam’s apple bopping and brushing along Kakashi’s nose. “Yes.”

Kakashi opens his eyes again, staring past golden skin into the room. “I have been terrified of the prospect, but I…” He sighs, with a frown. “I have always known I would have children with you.” He snorts. “And when I…” He breaks off, swallowing, and then licks his lips, voice a broken whisper. “And when I think about it… about the way they would look, could look, might look…” He breaks off, left hand coming up to wipe at his eyes. His voice breaks on the words, something deep within him spilling out. “I hurt, Naruto, because I want it so much and I’m afraid I won’t be able to protect them, and I…”

Naruto chuckles, but it’s a laugh drenched with a sob, and then his arms tighten, to pull Kakashi in even further, nose pressing into Kakashi’s temple. “Baka. They’ll be our kids.”

Kakashi sniffs, turning his head to find Naruto’s lips. 

Sighing against them. “Yes.” He opens himself for a deep kiss, before breaking it again, eyes finding Naruto’s on short distance. “I’m afraid of the timing though.”

Naruto stares at him, unblinking, with a whisper. “Because nothing happens without sacrifice?”

 

Kakashi snorts, darkly, and then reaches up, to pull Naruto into a kiss, foregoing answering, but there is this voice in his head, screaming: Yes.

 

 

Nothing.

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

“Your birthday is coming up again.”

 

Kakashi looks up from his lunch plate, biting into the onigiri with delight. “Yes?”

Naruto shrugs, grinning broadly at him. “Well, since we’re… you know, waiting now, and with everything we are planning…” He puts a nigiri into his mouth, chewing on it before grinning again. “Last time to celebrate without babysitter!”

Kakashi snorts, shaking his head once. “And, so?”

Naruto swallows, and then sobers a bit, tone careful, with a look around at the other people in the little shop. “I talked to Sensei Guy…”

Kakashi hums, watching him, while taking a bite out of his onigiri. Knowing what’s coming and trying not to feel too much. “About?”

Naruto grimaces a bit, fidgeting. “Why you don’t celebrate your birthday?” He ducks his head a bit. “I mean apart from the official parties now?”

Kakashi sighs, leaning back, and putting his sticks down. “I see.”

Naruto looks up at him, from beneath his lashes. “Are you mad?”

Kakashi shakes his head, very slowly. “No, of course not.”

Naruto watches him, and then prompts. “But?”

Kakashi shrugs, and then looks up into the sky for a long moment, before he lowers his eyes again, watching Naruto’s anxious expression. “Nothing, Naruto. Of course you may know why I don’t celebrate it much, or… voluntarily.” He smirks, and then reaches over, to brush his thumb over Naruto’s cheek, his heart thumping hard when Naruto nestles into his hand. “I don’t know why he chose that day to commit suicide, maybe it was just too hard that day, or he remembered her, or…” He trails off. And shrugs.

Naruto swallows, his big eyes impossibly blue. “Her? Your mom?”

Kakashi nods, gliding his fingers along Naruto’s jaw and then dropping them again, mindful of their surroundings. And the eyes on them. “Yes.”

 

Naruto nods once, and then bites his lips, eyes lowered.

Kakashi watches him for a moment, before lifting his onigiri again, asking before taking another bite. “But that is not really what you wanted to talk about.”

Naruto grins, an instinctual, proud and easy little grin, that flits over his face, there and gone again. “No.” He shrugs. “And yes.” He lifts his eyes again, reaches across the table to take Kakashi’s left hand. “I want to take you out that evening. Remake some of the memories.”

Kakashi swallows, looking away for a moment, before squeezing the fingers holding him. “I see.”

Naruto tilts his head, ducking it a bit to catch his gaze. “May I?”

Kakashi snorts, though he is far from amused, more like dangerously unmoored suddenly. 

He shrugs.

 

Naruto pushes up, leaning across the table to press a kiss to his masked mouth, utterly ignorant of anyone who might be watching, his other hand holding the back of Kakashi’s head, gently. 

The word is pressed into the cloth. “Good.”

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

He looks at the lot of them, for a long moment, before he sighs soundlessly, addressing them. “Alright. I want you to go to Amegakure together, find someone to negotiate with, do that, and find the glowing ruins that Suigetsu talked about. Find a way to access them.” He lifts his eyebrows. “And, just so you know, you need to be back next March, or Naruto will kill me.”

Tsunade grins, sharing a look with Jiraiya, who is standing there with his arms crossed.

Offering a mock-complaint, though Kakashi can see the twinkle in his eyes. “Amegakure again? I thought I could see the world a bit after my resurrection, but no…” 

Hanabi speaks up, with the faintest blush on her face. “It is a delight to have such a proficient and legendary pair as you two with us.”

Sasuke drawls, tone dripping with sarcasm. “Or so perverted.”

Tsunade puts her hands on her hips. “Don’t extend that reputation to me just because we’re spending time together now, young man, I have you know…”

Sasuke interjects, with a sidelong glance and definite humor in his voice. “I heard about the bathhouse.”

 

 

Silence.

 

 

Kakashi lowers his eyes, trying not to giggle. 

 

Everyone has heard about the bathhouse.

 

If he is honest, he’s glad that Tsunade and Jiraiya redirect some of the attention, because Kakashi and Naruto… haven’t been exactly laying low either. 

 

He clears his throat. “Yeah, well, be that as it may, you’re still a powerful group.” He addresses Karin, who has been standing there with Neji behind her, obviously amusing herself by watching. “I hope you will be able to make sense of the readings.” He quirks an eyebrow at Neji, before nodding at Hanabi. “And you two - the Godaime is a master at taijutsu. Happy training.” 

He quirks a smile. “I expect regular reports. Dismissed.”

 

 

Jiraiya nods, and turns to the door, only for it to open up, Minato stepping in with a dusty looking Naruto.

Kakashi’s heart gives a painful thud while he grins to himself. Put you through the paces, hmm?

 

Minato nods at Kakashi, before hugging Jiraiya. “I just wanted to come by and say bye. Time’s flying.”

Jiraiya hums, and it is a good hurt to see him bend a bit down, tightening the embrace for a long moment before stepping back. “Indeed.” He shrugs. “We will try to be back in a few months.” He grins at Naruto, opening his arms. “How are the wedding preparations coming along you imp?”

Naruto chuckles, and then moves into the offered embrace, easily, pressing his face into the Sannin’s chest before stepping back. “Good.” He waggles his eyebrows. “Though there’s been a change of plans.” He points his thumb. “But I need to talk to Kakashi about that first.”

 

He turns to Kakashi, beaming, and Minato does, too, and Kakashi is struck with the similarity between them, Naruto a spit image of Minato in this moment, the grins matching, and the blue eyes twinkling in sync, both bathed in the golden light of the morning sun.

 

It’s… weird.

 

He blinks, lowering his gaze, trying to shake off whatever funk he’s stuck in, his voice rough. “We can talk about that in a moment.” He nods at the group. “I was just sending them off.”

 

Naruto nods, and then turns to Sasuke, for a second, before turning back to Kakashi, and then… turning back to Sasuke, clearing his throat.

Sasuke watches him, quiet and serene. 

Hanabi does, too, and then moves back, just one step.

Naruto shoots her a thankful look, but addresses Sasuke. “I hope you will have a good time there. Thank you for guarding them.”

Jiraiya scoffs, mumbling something under his breath that definitely has the word imp in it.

Naruto grins softly, before nodding at Hanabi, too. “Maybe you can go past the complex on the way out the village. I think Hinata wants to tell you, too.”

 

Kakashi’s heart thuds, painfully, aware, and then picks up the pace, a shiver running down his spine.

 

Sasuke hums, purple eyes watching Naruto like a shark. “Of course. You better make the best of the coming months, hmm.” The purple eyes snap to Kakashi. “We’ll be back for the wedding.”

Kakashi nods, unable to say much to that.

Sasuke nods, and then turns to the door, but hesitates and then waits to let Hanabi go first and Kakashi smirks to himself, watching the group leave, the moment the door closes seemingly settling like a heavy weight.

 

He tries to breathe through it, through the sensation of doom, and suddenly Naruto is there, holding him fast, lips pressing onto the skin behind his ear.

Not speaking, just holding.

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, and locks his arms around him, holding on, for dear life.

 

 

 

On the other side of the room Minato is watching them, silently.

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

“So how is living with the previous Mizukage.”

 

Guy flashes a smile at him, thumbs up, before resuming his push ups. “It is beyond joy and fear, the youthful flamboyance that rushes through us whenever we meet.” Guy hesitates, before shooting Kakashi a look. “I hear it is the same for you and Naruto, too?” Guy grins, broadly. “I have you know that there are bets on the two of you if you will disappear whenever you are or meet outside.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes, pretending to be annoyed, while sitting in the shade under a tree for his lunch, watching Guy train. “Disappear?”

Guy waggles his eyebrows. “Yes. To consume the love that binds you.”

Kakashi snorts, and then blushes. “Oh, that.” He clears his throat, eyes unseeing on the people in the park. “Yeah, that happened.”

He and Guy share a little laugh, and there’s a pause, an amicable, easy pause.

 

Eventually Guy speaks up again, breath even and calm while he enters the count of thousand. “Obito and I went out for training the other day.”

Kakashi freezes, mid-chew, and then forces himself to continue eating, voice careful. “Oh?” He hesitates, and then adds, carefully. “You haven’t been exactly… happy about him here - what changed?”

Guy is quiet for a minute, and then clicks his tongue, tone not as exuberant as usually. “I believe it was time for me to admit that change happens.” 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, nodding to himself. “Yep, it’s an interesting time right now.”

Guy nods. “Your ties with Sensei Iruka are too precious to sever.” He holds for a moment, before lowering himself again, with a frown. “I believe so is our friendship. If I were to interfere continuously by my rebuffing of Obito, it would put a wedge between you. And you and me.”

Kakashi grimaces. “Guy, I…”

Guy interjects, tone calm. “I know, we have talked about that before. However, now I can report, that he is witty, and fast, and a pleasure to train with.”

Kakashi snaps his mouth shut, looking down at his lunchbox, tapping his finger on it once. “Do you trust him now?”

Guy weighs his head, and then shoots Kakashi a look, from under a sweaty brow. “As far as I can throw him?”

 

Kakashi snorts, and then continues eating, some of the gloomy doom vanishing, thank god.

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

“So. Ready?”

 

Kakashi sighs, and then shakes his head once, with a small smile. “Of course?”

Naruto vibrates in front of him, blue eyes sparkling, the grin seemingly etched into his face. “Ah, you’ll love it?”

Kakashi grumbles a bit, trying to sound annoyed though he knows Naruto can see right through it. “I would love it more if I knew where we’re going?”

Naruto grins, reaching up to pull at the shirt Kakashi wears for a change, the simple garment that he had chosen for today. “Yeah, but where would be the fun in that?”

Kakashi grumbles, under his breath.

Naruto snickers, and then leans in, claims his lips in a bruising kiss before pulling up the mask, gently. “Now. Keep the taste, and there’ll be more of it later. But we have to go now.”

Kakashi pouts, knowing Naruto can see right through him. “But why not now?”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “Come on, darling, we’re going to be late.”

 

Kakashi sighs, and then lets himself get dragged out the door, down the market street, and through several streets, around corners he knows is meant to playfully confuse him in regards to their destination though they both know that is futile, and then…

 

…he blinks, looking up at the building.

 

He knows it is here, of course. And, if he’s honest with himself, of course he knew where they’d been going. 

 

 

He just hadn’t anticipated this advertisement over it.

 

This huge billboard.

 

 

Naruto leans in, voice suffused with laughter, his breath tickling Kakashi’s neck. “You have no idea how much Ero-Sennin wanted to tell you. I had to literally threaten him to shut up about it??”

Kakashi blinks, feeling something deep within himself start to unclench, shiver with excitement, with delight, with anticipation, with … joy.

 

On this day, of all days.

 

He swallows, knowing his voice is scratchy. “I… there will be a film?”

Naruto chuckles, deeply, throatily, while his thumb strokes along the skin of Kakashi’s hand. “There is a film. And it’s on tonight. Now, to be precise. And I have tickets.”

 

Kakashi shivers.

Naruto leans in, to breathe wetly against his ear. “And if you’re really lucky, we might be able to enhance that experience, hmm? I got us seats all the way back. All the seats in the back.”

Kakashi’s tongue feels thick in his mouth. “Really.”

Naruto’s voice is a breath, carried on delight. “Yesssss.”

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long moment.

 

Reopens them to Naruto, grinning at him fiendishly. 

Tugging at his hand. “Come now, darling. Let us watch ‘Icha Icha Paradise’!”

Kakashi mewls, and follows him inside, the short trip something of a blur.

 

He’s not sure why he is so shaken, only that he is.

There’s Naruto, there, beaming at him, tugging him along. There’s the gloom of the day, hovering in the back of his mind. There’s this vague disbelief that Naruto and Jiraiya have actually managed not to tell him. Not to mention any of his other friends and colleagues.

There’s this breathtaking anticipation of sitting in the movie theater with Naruto, watching a romance. Or, a romance at best, at worst a soft porn. 

Knowing that Naruto will be up for something.

 

Pun very much intended.

 

Kakashi swallows, his mouth dry.

 

Naruto’s smile is wide, and knowing.

Kakashi wants to kiss it off of him, now.

 

 

Naruto drags him into the dark of the theater, into the buzz of it, the trailers already on. 

The last rows are empty, as promised, and Naruto drags Kakashi there, pushes him down into the middle of the last row, where bags of popcorn and drinks are already next to their seats, and a small bag that Kakashi recognizes, his pulse picking up speed.

He swallows, turning to Naruto. “Naruto… I don’t thi…”

Naruto shushes him, with a finger against his mask. “Shh. I’ve already seen it, it was part of the negotiations after… anyways, please…” He hesitates, eyes huge and dark on Kakashi’s. “Let me?”

Kakashi raises a shaking finger to his face, watches him snuggle into the palm.

There are no words on his tongue, in his mind, outside: “I love you.”

 

Naruto snickers, and then moves away, settling next to him and reaching for the popcorn.

Kakashi’s hand drops down, in slow motion, as the movie starts, and Naruto’s hand finds his. 

 

 

For a while, there is only the movie.

 

A ferociously romantic movie, definitely scratching the envelope in regards to the sex scenes, but the explicit things are only hinted at, insinuated.

Not so the romance itself, brilliantly adapted from the book, spelt out and surprisingly moving, a classic tail of misunderstanding and longing, and guilt.

Kakashi wants to drown in it.

 

He almost misses Naruto dropping to his knees in front of him, in one fluid motion, after two thirds. Folding himself into the little space, squeezed between Kakashi’s legs.

He frowns, torn between being instantly aroused by whatever Naruto is planning… and wanting to continue to watch.

Naruto laughs at him, teeth flashing. “Keep watching.” Kakashi blinks, with a quirked eyebrow, and Naruto leans in, just a bit, waggling his. “Keep watching, honey. You don’t want to attract attention when someone looks back?”

Right.

 

Kakashi swallows, raising his eyes back to the screen, with an effort, but it’s immediately clear why Naruto chose this moment to make his move, to run his hands up Kakashi’s groin. 

Why he chose this moment to unzip him, pull his cock out.

 

Because the couple on the screen does the same, insinuated only, yes, but…

 

Kakashi has never been more happy for his mask, the only thing keeping his eyes on the screen the years and years of his Anbu training.

The movie theater is quiet, everyone holding their breath or whispering at most, while the woman’s head sinks down, onto what is out of frame, and Naruto’s mouth swallows him, deeply.

Kakashi’s shaking hand finds Naruto’s head, to anchor himself.

Music swells, and the hero’s face is twisted now, in anguished delight.

Kakashi guesses his own is, too.

 

Naruto is so good at this.

He wants to weep.

 

It won’t take long, either, and especially not in this kind of situation.

 

And Kakashi doesn’t want to stretch it out. Stares at the screen, to take in everything, unblinking. Opens himself to what he sees, what he wants, what he feels, what he hears, what he…

He wants to come down that glorious throat, just when the hero throws his head back, and…

 

Fire, through his loins, and into his heart. 

Love, so pure it is transcendent, coupling breathtakingly, simply, with lust. 

The tattoo pulses, in tandem with his heart. And the chuckle of Naruto’s mouth, and the throbbing of his tongue, pressing. The serene delight of the sensation of a swallow, perfectly timed.

 

Blissed-out white-out, freezing the sensation, until it is unbearable.

And his eyes hurt.

 

And then pulse.

 

And Naruto pulls back, swallowing, his voice raw, and used, and astonished. Echoing the hero’s heartfelt sigh. “Oh my god.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

“You want to tell me that he reawakened his sharingan… while watching Icha Icha.”

 

Kakashi shifts to his other foot, aware he is beet red, while Naruto nods, wildly. “Yeah, I took him to see it for his birthday, you know, for new memories, and, well…” He rolls his eyes, and clears his throat. “There was this one scene, right, and I kinda gave him a present there, and then…”

Sora’s voice drips with amusement. “I’ve seen the movie. You mean you blew him, right? And somehow the fusion of the sensations, and his love for you, and for the movie fused hotly enough to reawaken his sharingan.”

 

Kakashi wants the earth to swallow him up, now.

 

Naruto giggles, ducking his head, while his hand keeps Kakashi safely there, stopping him from vanishing on the spot. “Yeah, but only for an instant? I mean, we had theorized about that before hadn’t we? But he doesn’t seem to be able to activate it now, I mean, it was only for an instant…” He turns to Kakashi, and Kakashi squirms under the double gaze, both amused and delighted, and…

Naruto continues, with a shrug. “You helped him to activate it before. I figured we should come to you right away.”

Sora touches the front of her teeth for a moment with her tongue, obviously trying to get a grip on her amusement. “Mhhh hmmm.” She nods once, and then clears her throat, still grinning. “Well, I mean, if he cannot just activate it now it means that he is repressing something once more.” She quirks an eyebrow at Kakashi, while trying to suppress her laughter, but it is clearly in her voice. “Just look at him Naruto, he is so locked up right now, there’s steam coming out of his ears?”

Naruto snickers, and Kakashi closes his eyes, while trying not to faint from sheer embarrassment. 

 

He forces himself to say something, eventually, when it is apparent that they’re both waiting. “I mean. Can you really blame me?” Talk will be all over town by now, with the ruckus after that moment. He swallows. “A lot of people got to… see.” A lot.

Sora hums, still grinning at him. “Mhh hmm. And a lot of people have probably realized by now that you are the first one to awaken them through positive emotions.”

Naruto pipes up, voice delighted and so cheerful Kakashi wants to smack him. “That’s because they’re my eyes!”

Sora ducks her head, pinches the bridge of her nose, while her shoulders shake. “Indeed.” She sniffs, and then looks back up, her hazel eyes sparkling. “We might have known, Kakashi.”

Kakashi grunts, noncommittally. 

Naruto tugs at his hand, beams at him, before addressing Sora again. “So, what now?”

Sora looks at him, nodding, and then shrugs, looking away for a long moment, before looking back, her expression kind now, and wistful. “Honestly… that won’t need help.”

Naruto frowns.

Kakashi does too, sharing a quick look with him, before having to ask. “It won’t?”

Sora grins broadly, and then reaches up, to pat his arm. “No.” She winks at him. “You will know when, I would bet my life on it.”

Naruto blinks, with a vaguely confused expression. “Oooookay?”

Kakashi tilts his head, narrowing his eyes. “What is it you know and we do not?”

Sora cackles, and then steps back, spreading her arms. “I don’t know what you mean?”

Kakashi grumbles at her.

 

Sora nods at him, her eyes still sparkling. “Just trust me. You do that, don’t you.”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, once. With a shrug. “I do.”

 

 

I do.

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

He’s on the roof later, much later, when the obvious excitement of it all has died down, when the official congratulations had happened, and when he and his friends and family had celebrated a bit - carefully not breaching that subject - it is later, that Obito settles next to him, there on the roof.

 

Kakashi turns his head, to look at him for a moment, before toasting him, with his half-empty glass. “To new beginnings.”

Obito smirks, before clinking their glasses. “So I’m allowed to comment on it now?”

Kakashi shoots him a look. “You weren’t before?”

Obito cackles. “Naruto told us not to, because he feared he’d pushed you too far already. He said he wanted only good memories for today, so we should can it.

Kakashi snorts. “That must have been hell for Kushina.” They share a chuckle, and Kakashi sobers slowly, raising his eyes to the starry night. “No, but really… that is very thoughtful of him. I was quite… overwhelmed, earlier.” He snorts. “Overwhelmed and almost traumatically embarrassed.”

Obito giggles, his wrinkled face brightening beautifully. “Oh god I would have loved to be there?” He snickers, voice suffused with laughter. “This is so you?”

Kakashi grumbles, for effect. “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up.”

Obito takes a sip of his own drink, with a hum. “No, but really. It is so you to do things backwards. To let guilt and perception stand in your way… I bet you could have awakened them much earlier.”

Kakashi pulls a face. “I cannot activate them now, so…”

Obito waves a hand. “Oh I bet you can, you just…” He shrugs. “It’s you.”

Kakashi glowers at him. Obito shrugs innocently. 

 

Kakashi lets his head fall back after a moment, with a sigh. “You’re probably right. Still… I feel so weird?”

Obito looks at him. “Because…?”

Kakashi blinks, slowly, and then turns his head, to catch Obito’s gaze. “That moment, on the battlefield. Eyes that were made from you and him. Two ends of the spectrum, and I love you.” He shakes his head once, feeling unmoored. “I love you both, I… love all these people down there, and those that are somewhere else, and I feel…” He breaks off, averting his gaze, unseeing. “I feel so much, all the time? I never…”

Obito pulls him in, into a half-embrace, holding fast. 

His voice is low. “Oh, you always felt strongly, Kakashi. Bakakashi. So strongly, but you kept it locked away, deep, deep down, and it gnawed at you.” He snorts, painfully. “I know a thing or two about that as well.” Kakashi sniffs.

Obito puts his head onto Kakashi’s. “But we have come such a long way. And I have to tell you… I love you, too. And him. And them. And, of course… Iruka. And there are times when I cannot fully grasp it myself, times when I stare at him, in the dark, and I feel like it might just slip right through my fingers, the very next instance, but then he smiles, and he is still there in the morning, and he grumbles when he is getting up…” They share a chuckle, and Obito sniffs. “And it’s those little things that have made me realize how precious this life is, this love. Beyond the bonds.” He lifts his head, to look at Kakashi, eyes crinkling when their eyes meet. 

Obito lifts his eyebrows. “And… you know I love Naruto for the fierce desire of change, for the better. I love him for the way he managed to stay on his path, beyond the pain.” He pushes his forehead to Kakashi’s, squeezes him tightly. “I love him for what he managed to do to you.”

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, just feeling, for a long moment. 

 

Obito sniffs, eventually, with a chuckle. “And… I cannot wait to see your eyes… our eyes.”

Kakashi snorts, and then blinks, opening his dark eyes to Obito’s now red ones. “I haven’t even asked how they look.”

Obito grins, broadly, and then cackles, shaking his head, just a bit. “See? So you.”

Kakashi snorts, and then joins the chuckle, and they stay there, watching the moon.

 

Until Naruto comes, and drags them down again, for some kind of game.

Until Iruka beams at Obito, and Kakashi kisses Naruto, carelessly, deeply, feeling like bursting.

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi blinks at Rock Lee, trying not to let his astonishment color his voice. “I see congratulations are in order.”

 

Rock Lee beams at him, the bushy eyebrows high up, eyes wide. “I hereby request permission to adapt my schedules to raise him.”

Kakashi nods, staring at the little bundle in Rock Lee’s arms. At the huge backpack next to him, obviously stuffed with all the necessities a child would need. “Granted.” He hesitates. “Will there be more… honors to be bestowed?”

Lee swallows. “Maybe sometimes. She had twins, and now has what she needs, and I…” He blinks, and then looks down onto the baby, and Kakashi watches in fascination as his face clears, as the pain melts away, with almost blinding love. “She kept the girl. And I… I have found my purpose.”

Kakashi blinks, and then nods. “I see.”

Lee’s gaze comes up, slowly, something vaguely haunted in it. “It was hard, leaving them.”

Kakashi works his jaw for a moment, shaking his head once. “Not all traditions are to our liking. But… it is up to them to change them. We cannot force them to. We knew when we accepted the invitation.”

Lee sniffs, and then nods, once, curtly. 

His smile is bright, forced. “Of course, Rokudaime.” He nods, once. “Thank you, Hokage-sama.”

Kakashi exhales, and then nods, too, before nodding at the child. “He looks like your spit image. Or will, with time.”

Lee’s face clears, the sun entering his features.

He beams at Kakashi. “He does.”

 

Kakashi nods again, and then snorts, gently, with an eye-smile, understanding suddenly, and its relief, because now he knows. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 62: Winds of change

Notes:

“Boruto” is a name that was supposedly chosen as a honorable nod to Neji in canon. Since Neji didn’t die here I chose differently. (Relatively) Short chapters ahead before "the big one", but it just clicked into place like this.

Chapter Text

 

 

 

Naruto’s brow is furrowed, staring at his fingernails.

Watching them grow, slowly, elongated and sharp, and the texture changes, slowly, until it’s a claw. 

 

Sora nods. “Good. And now, open your mouth, let me see the teeth.”

Naruto does as she asks, opening his mouth wide, and lets the fangs grow, slowly, controlled.

Sora nods again. “Good. You’ve become better at controlling it.”

Naruto shrugs, letting the changes revert back, instantly. “You told me I should practice.” He shoots a look at Kakashi, who is watching, silently. “And I mean, these are easy now. Whatever Mom is up to will just make I easier, if I understood that correctly. “

Kakashi exhales, and then shrugs. “I think so. I know it sounds crass, but…”

Naruto nods. “No, I get it. And I have discussed it with Kurama, at length. He agrees.”

Kakashi tilts his head. “You’re not afraid anymore.” Or angry.

Naruto shrugs. “I… was afraid, yes. But I mean…” He blushes, just a bit, with a little self-deprecating chuckle. “It’s power, you know?”

Sora snorts. “Massive power, yes.” She waggles her eyebrows at Naruto when he looks at her. “You’ll surpass Hashirama I bet.”

Naruto preens a bit, but is wise enough not to comment.

 

Kakashi snorts, and then shakes his head. “So. Is there… a timeframe?” When you want to activate the continuous regeneration?

Naruto shrugs. “I had thought first wedding, then kids, but…”

Kakashi cackles, “Are we really that traditional.”

Naruto pulls a face. “I… I mean we did everything else backwards?”

Kakashi grins, and then moves in, to hug him for a split second. “We did.” He draws back a bit, to look at Naruto’s face, thoroughly enjoying the way Naruto’s body fits with his. “So?”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “Kurama wants to show off on my birthday, so….

Sora hums, stepping over to the sofa and sitting down on it. “Oh, I hope I’m invited?”

Naruto grins at her. “Of course.” He turns his head back, to press a kiss to Kakashi’s clothed lips. “Could you talk to my Dad and Mom? I promised Konohamaru to train a bit with him.”

Kakashi frowns. “But you could just talk to them later?”

Naruto grins, eyes sparkling. “Yesss, but it gives you an excuse to meet up for lunch?” He reaches up, to place his hand on Kakashi’s throat. “And you need a break, Hokage-sama.”

Kakashi exhales, turning to eye the stack of papers on his desk rather dubiously. “I guess.”

Naruto hums, leaning in to nose along his cheek. “Take Shika with you. He needs a break as well.”

 

Kakashi nods, relishing the feeling. “I will.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

Kushina shoots a look at Shikamaru, and then grins at Kakashi, before lowering her head. 

Kakashi tries not to grin, too, quirking an eyebrow at Minato.

 

Who rolls his eyes, with a shake of his head, addressing Shikamaru directly. “So. I hear Temari is a bit compromised, health-wise?”

Shikamaru’s head snaps up, eyes conveying endless annoyance, tone somewhat sharp. “She’s not compromised in any way.”

Kushina chortles, shooting a not so kind look at Minato. “What exactly do you mean with compromised…”

Minato grimaces, and then shrugs, but Kakashi steps in before he can answer, firmly. “We heard she’s pregnant?” He tilts his head. “Uncle Gaara will be so happy?”

He watches in fascination as Shikamaru winces. “Right.”

 

There is a pause.

 

Kakashi blinks, prompting, carefully. “Aren’t you happy?”

Shikamaru groans. “I am.”

Kushina narrows her eyes, tilting her head. “Buuuuutttt?”

Shikamaru grunts, rolling his eyes. “He’s flooding our inboxes with name suggestions. Sending us stuff. Asking when the wedding is. I swear, if he didn’t have his own duties he’d be here,”, he makes a sweeping gesture with his hands, “allllllll the time.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he snickers.

Shikamaru sends him a skunk-eye.

Kakashi points at him, and then at Minato and Kushina. “Hey, we all have our weight to carry…” He cackles at the mock-outraged twin expressions on Minato’s and Kushina’s faces. “Oh please.” He waggles his eyebrows. “Don’t pretend you don’t dig any bit of information… or gossip you can get.”

Kushina rolls her eyes, loftily. “It is what we’re here for.” She clicks her tongue at Kakashi. “And you know it.” She grins for a moment, and then leans forward, waggling her eyebrows. “So. When’s the wedding.”

Shikamaru grunts. “Well, Naruto suggested we’d do it at the event with them.”

 

Kakashi blinks, and then stares at him.

 

Shikamaru grimaces. “Oh, he didn’t tell you yet.” He sighs, deeply. “Of course.” He lifts his eyebrows, tone dry as the desert. “Rokudaime-sama, I hereby inform you that your soulmate wants a quadruple wedding. You, him, me, Temari, Hinata, Tenten, and… Sasuke and Hanabi.”

Kakashi stares at him, sticks in hand, mouth open, not knowing what to feel. “I… see.” So that is why you wanted him to come along. And with Minato and Kushina, too. You little… He frowns. “Sasuke and Hanabi?”

Shikamaru shrugs. “From what I understand they still want to take it slow, but they also want to be a part of it all. And Naruto and Sasuke…” He trails off.

Kakashi blinks, and then nods, understanding that part too well. “They want to share this.”

Minato speaks up, tone infinitely gentle. “They are bonded, in a different way, but just as tightly.” He tilts his head. “Just like you and Obito.” He snorts. “I’m actually surprised Iruka and Obito are not jumping the train as well.”

Kakashi blinks, and then smiles at him, any jealousy or pain utterly absent. “Yeah. I know.”

Shikamaru hums, and then looks up at him, eyes all-seeing. “Do you mind?”

 

Kakashi frowns, and hesitates, eyes unseeing on his meal. 

He feels for the truth, for his own reaction, there in his gut. And his heart.

He shakes his head. “Not… really?”

Kushina tilts her head, silently.

Kakashi shrugs, and then exhales, with a little laugh. “It’s just so… after all the waiting, you know, all these years…. Of course things would happen in a rush now.” He cackles. “It just makes stupid sense I guess?” He points his chin at Minato and Kushina. “And, I mean, this is going to be the event, isn’t it. A change of pathways and of families… quite ambitious, really.” We’ll be actually family soon. And of course those that will be family would want to do it together. 

He exhales, and then shakes his head. “No. I do not mind. I… look forward to it.”

And to asking why the hell Naruto sent Shikamaru instead of telling me himself.

 

Shikamaru exhales, slowly, and then clears his throat. “Also… there’s been another little change of plans.”

Kakashi blinks at him, slowly, drawling. “Change.”

Shikamaru grimaces. “Yeah well, since so many are pregnant now, and because it’s hard to estimate… that event has been moved up. I think the consensus was to do it on new years eve.”

Kakashi’s reply is intelligent. Not. “Huh.”

Kushina squeals, clapping her hands. “Ohhhhhhh, that is going to be so lovely??”

Minato smirks at her, utterly indulgent. “You’re going to drag me to pick out a dress, won’t you.”

Kushina leans in, kisses him on his nose with a giggle. “Of course?”

Minato chuckles, and then catches her lips, in a long, totally besotted kiss.

 

Kakashi clears his throat, eventually, grinning at them, just a bit meanly. “Get a room.”

Kushina beams at him, and then bites her lips. “Good idea.” She quirks an eyebrow at Minato, and Minato blinks, and then turns to Kakashi, with a shrug. “Excuse us.”

 

And they’re gone, and Kakashi chortles, pressing his fingers to the bridge of his nose, for a long moment. And then shares a look a look with Shikamaru, who starts to snicker, and then Kakashi snickers, and pulls him into a half-embrace, and then Shikamaru starts to rant about Naruto using him to do his fucking job of telling Kakashi and Kakashi lets him, nods in the right places and just… is. 

 

Totally enjoying himself. 

 

And his heart is beating in his throat.

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

Naruto falls back onto the pillows, gasping for breath, hissing when his red and glowing bottom touches the blanket. “Ow.” He snickers, and then groans, undulating, his chest smeared with come. “Alright…”

Kakashi watches him, panting as well, while massaging his hand. “You so deserved that.”

Naruto chuckles, deeply, throatily. “Oh yes.” He lifts an eyebrow. “What though exactly?” He grins. “And what do I have to do for you to do it again?”

Kakashi shakes his head, exasperatedly. “You imp. Sending Shikamaru to tell me of your plans.”

Naruto hums, drawing his hand idly over his messy chest. “Oh, that.” He grunts, reaching down to give his spent cock a leisurely pump. “Well, I was expecting and hoping for a reaction, but this…” He undulates, licking his lips. “Anytime, darling.”

Kakashi shakes his head at him, and then pushes him over, onto his stomach, pushing three fingers in, to Naruto’s gasp. “Insatiable, unfathomable, unpredictable imp. You did this on purpose. Using Shikamaru to get me to be… rough on you.”

Naruto groans, deeply, tilting his hips to get Kakashi to push them deeper. “And you love it.”

Kakashi grunts, reaching for his own cock with his other, slowly stroking it back to life. “You certainly make life worthwhile.”

Naruto laughs, and then sighs, tone surprisingly soft. “Any second with you is worthwhile.”

Kakashi stills, and looks up at him, fingers sunk deep, for all intents and purposes a very base situation, but it’s so pure, too, a moment of sheer, and fleeting understanding.

He swallows, and pulls his fingers out, pushing his rehardening cock in, while rolling on top of Naruto, threading their messy hands together, and his face into Naruto’s neck.

Naruto sighs, happily. “I wish we could stay like this. Always.”

 

Kakashi hums into gold, into home, while pleasure tingles, sedately. “So do I.”

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

The room is full, and loud with chatter.

 

 

Kakashi stares into it, from the doorway, Minato behind him, with a hand on his shoulder. 

Minato’s thumb strokes him, softly, his voice a whisper. “That’s your family now.” Kakashi swallows, and Minato’s hand tightens for a moment, driving the point home. “Our family.”

Kakashi tilts his head, just enough to catch Minato’s gaze, from the corners of his eyes. “I…” He frowns, and then shrugs, softly, carefully not dislodging Minato’s hand, which seems to be the only thing keeping him grounded right now. 

Minato smirks. “Quite the family, too… it is wise that you include them already.” 

Kakashi shakes his head once. “How could I not.” He frowns. “We are family. In blood and law soon, but we’ve always been, in a way. We went and forced fate to give us back the things we wanted.” The things we needed to heal our souls.

Minato hums, watching him. “Indeed.” He clicks his tongue. “Still. It will only be perfect when Sasuke and Hanabi, and Neji and Karin are here, too.”

Kakashi nods, but shrugs. “True. And I guess we’ll have to get a bigger dining room then.”

Minato cackles. “Maybe?”

 

Kushina saunters over to them, arms crossed, a smile on her lips. “What are my favorite men doing over here?”

Naruto pipes up, from the other side of the room, where he is distributing the food with Tenten. “Hey!”

Kushina snorts, shooting him a look back over her shoulder. “You’re my son, that doesn’t count.”

Naruto sniffs, exaggeratedly. “Did you hear that? I don’t count…”

Hinata snickers.

Tenten grins, and then leans in a bit, to waggle her eyebrows, laughter in her voice. “Just wait till next spring. Then we all won’t count anymore…”

Hinata ducks her head, but shakes it, too, with a little groan. “Yes, my father has been insufferable already.” She winks at Naruto, while tilting her head towards Kushina. “At least your parents have been pretending to be cool.”

Kakashi snickers, sharing a look with Minato.

 

Kushina puts her hands on her hips, in mock-outrage. “Pretending?”

Naruto snorts, waving a hand. “Oh yeah, I mean when she learned that you are pregnant she wouldn’t stop squealing. Dad had a headache from the high-pitched sound.”

Minato groans. “Damn, Naruto, I told you that in confidence?”

Kakashi laughs, under his breath, seeing the glower Kushina sends him.

Hinata sighs, and then shares a look with Tenten, before straightening up a bit. “Kakashi-san, I was wondering if my father would be allowed to attend the wedding?”

Kakashi lifts his eyebrows, and then shoots a look over at Tenten’s parents, who have been sitting by in the corner, more or less quietly observing, which Tenten had described to him earlier as ‘starstruck’ in a giggled whisper. 

He clears his throat. “Hiashi-san has been allowed to move within the city limits before for doctor’s visits and such, and he has fought in the war. I don’t see why not?” He shares a look with Minato and then shrugs, before quirking a smile. “Besides, the outskirts will be a part of Konoha soon, the village is growing so much.”

Kushina hums, with a nod, stepping over to the table. “Yes, and there will be lots of children being born around the same time.” She grins. “That academy year will be quite interesting.”

 

Tenten’s father speaks up, voice careful. “If those children will want to enter it.”

All eyes turn to him, and he squirms a bit under the attention, but shrugs. “The village you are building, Hokage-sama… it is not a shinobi village anymore.”

Kakashi blinks, in the sudden silence, and then steps over, settling on his knees across the table from them. 

He nods. “That’s true.” He looks up and over at Naruto, shares a small smile with him, before looking back. “And I am glad for it.” He clicks his tongue, letting his eyes glide over Hinata and Tenten, before staring out the window for a moment. “Already the village has quarters much bigger than the graveyard. It used to be the other way around.” 

Minato nods, settling next to him. “Indeed. And there were so many funerals…” A shadow passes over his face, but he smirks, with a bit of an effort. “Already some shinobi have chosen alternative careers.” He quirks an eyebrow at Tenten, but addresses her father. “Like your daughter. A career that makes use of her skills, beyond the need for blood.” 

Tenten’s mother sniffs. “I’ve been sleeping so much better.”

Kushina snorts, drily, painfully. “Oh yes.” She settles next to her, reaching for her hand. “I know what you mean.” She sighs, but then chuckles, with a shrug. “Still. The children growing right now will be their children.” She nods at Kakashi, and Naruto, and at Tenten and Hinata. “If they should wish to enter the academy… they will be very special.”

 

Naruto grins broadly, waggling his eyebrows. “It’s going to be so interesting to see what mix they’ll be though? I mean, Sensei Yamato’s and Yugao-san’s son is sooooo cute? The huge eyes of Sensei Yamato, and her hair?”

Kakashi hums, with a nod, and anticipation, fluttering in his gut. “Indeed.” He shares a long look with Naruto, echoes the helpless grin.

Hinata lightly pats her stomach. “Yeah, that’s going to be interesting to see.” 

Tenten leans into her, but addresses the room. “We’re betting on who will get the bigger stomach.”

Naruto snorts, shaking his head at her. “Can I join the pot?”

Hinata giggles. “Of course, Naruto-kun.”

Minato snorts. “Is there a pot on the genders, too?”

Tenten’s mom pipes up, voice carrying amusement, but stern. “Healthy would be good.”

Naruto tilts his head at her, his eyes shadowed and yellow. “Oh they are.”

Kakashi looks at him.

 

Naruto’s eyes find his, with a small smile. “I cannot enter that pot, sorry.” He blinks, and then looks over at Hinata. “I promised Hinata that I wouldn’t tell, but I know already.”

Kushina frowns, sharing a look with Tenten’s mom. “Isn’t it too early?”

Naruto shrugs. “It’s just there, floating with what I sense.”

Tenten sighs, dramatically. “And because Hina doesn’t want to know… we cannot narrow down the name search.”

Kakashi chuckles. “Oh the hardship.”

Naruto snorts. “Oh, you just wait. I’ve made a list.”

Minato nods, with a hum, and a grin. “Ah yes. Thankfully we were given a name.” He smiles at Kushina, who smirks back. “Though I don’t know where Jiraiya got it from.”

Kakashi hums. “Probably a premonition.”

Minato weighs his head. “Maybe.”

 

Kakashi refuses to clear his throat.

There’s a weird feeling in his gut, a weird… he cannot put a name to it.

He’s just glad Jiraiya isn’t here just now.

 

Naruto pipes up again. “Oh I know - we should pick names that relate to what we love most!”

Minato’s voice is deadpan. “That might have been the source for your name, actually.”

Naruto rolls his eyes, to the snicker of the others. “No, but really. I mean… imagine if we’d want to honor Neji… what would be a good name? Like… the jutsus he does… that motion. Boruto would be a good name?”

Kakashi shivers, watching him mutely.

Tenten pulls a face. “More like rasen, right? But then that is so tightly coupled with your jutsus. And I don’t feel like calling a child Sukuryū.”

Kushina cackles. “Yeah, no, calling them ‘screw’… no.” She weighs her head. “How about flowers? You could find names for flowers that fit well no matter the gender?”

She smiles at Hinata. “I always liked sunflowers. Himawari.”

Hinata ducks her head a bit, with a breathless whisper. “I like Teshi. An angel.”

Tenten leans over, with a little squeal, snuggling into her. “Oh, I love that.”

Kakashi swallows. “I always liked Haruki.”All eyes turn to him, and he swallows again, clicking his tongue, his eyes finding Naruto’s. “ It… reminded me of you. You’re that… radiant.” He trails off, at a loss for words. 

Naruto blinks, very slowly, before exchanging a glance with his mother. 

His voice is soft. “What was your mother’s name?” 

Kakashi’s voice is almost inaudible. “Takara. Precious. My father used to call me that. An endearment really, but it is a name also, and I…”

There is silence, and a sniff.

 

And then Tenten’s mother speaks up, vaguely deadpan. “Well. I don’t thing we’ll need that list after all.”

Minato sniffs, and then nods, while lifting his glass in a toast, his voice trembling. “I guess we won’t.”

 

And Kakashi sees nothing else, nothing else besides Naruto’s eyes.

And the future, there for the grasping.

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

The sealing hall is cool, and dark, once more, and it seems like ages ago that he was here.

 

Last time with Orochimaru.

And the time before, too.

 

Ages.

 

Naruto looks like covered in a fine net, laying silently in the huge seal, a seal that incorporates the columns and pillars and them.

 

Kakashi supposes nothing on earth could have made hims and by an watch… except them.

And, honestly, what had been the chances?

 

Kushina kneels next to Naruto, with Minato continuously weaving signs.

Silently. It’s meditative, almost like a spell. 

Except that Kushina is holding the knife.

 

Over Naruto’s forehead.

 

The impulse to smack it out of her hands is vicious, pulsing in Kakashi’s veins.

 

There is a twitch on Naruto’s lips, there and gone again. A smile.

Conversely, that helps.

 

 

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment, counts till ten.

 

 

 

 

 

 

It is terribly anticlimactic.

 

 

 

 

 

No trashing, no blurred lines, no screams.

He had been afraid.

 

So afraid.

 

 

But no, just a softening of shape, for a split second.

A split second where the seal flared up, blinding him, the after image of the scene burning itself into his mind. 

 

And then nothing, once more, just Kushina gasping.

And the knife clatters to the floor.

 

 

And Naruto sits up, slowly, staring at his hands.

Whispering. “Oh… cool.”

 

And Kakashi… snorts.

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

Naruto’s lips are soft, the vague stubble catching, and they are the same, thank god, and Kakashi drowns in them, in their taste, with the relief of mountains, taken away from his shoulders.

 

He had seen the same expression on Minato’s face.

Kushina’s had been wistful.

 

He hadn’t asked.

 

 

He had taken Naruto into his arms and had vanished, without waiting for anything for them to say, needing this, like breath.

 

They don’t always make love.

In the sense of the word at least.

 

Sometimes, it’s hard, and fast and kinky, it is what Naruto likes to explore and Kakashi needs, beyond what he admits.

 

This time, it is making love though.

 

 

Naruto’s touch is careful, gliding, holding.

There’s a vibrancy to the need in Kakashi’s veins, an awareness of the knife’s edge they just danced on.

Naruto is as fit as before, as hard edges and muscled planes, slim hips, and a cock that drives him insane. He’s deep kisses, and ferocious need, making Kakashi break in slow motion, an unerring aims. 

 

And chakra being pushed down his throat when he opens his mouth to scream, chakra that burns.

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

“Your eyes were red, earlier?”

 

Naruto hums, and then shrugs, his nose scrunching adorably. “Were they? Really? What did they look like?”

Kakashi hums, shifting his embrace so he can look at Naruto in his arms. “They were deep red, and slitted, but…” Not angry. He clicks his tongue. “They were still you.”

Naruto grins, broadly. “I felt like me, too?”

Kakashi nods once, with a sniff. “Good?” That’s good. He swallows. “How does it feel like?”

Naruto frowns, shifting a bit, hissing when certain sticky parts pull at hair. “I cannot really describe it. I know it worked? But it’s… a tingling sensation. A tremor, but not disturbing… It’s just there, and I know its power.” Naruto blows out his cheeks for a moment. “I wonder if it was the same for Hashirama-sama. You know, just knowing and feeling the regeneration?”

Kakashi hums, while he shifts his arm to reach up and play with Naruto’s hair. “I think everything is good, as long as it feels natural?” He hesitates, and then adds, drily. “To you at least?”

Naruto snorts, and then leans back a bit, to look at him more properly. “I don’t feel natural to you?”

 

Kakashi blinks, and then shakes his head with a bit of a sigh. “No, I meant your power. How it feels to you.” 

Naruto frowns. “But your lightning also does not feel alien, does it. I mean, Sasuke always said his was just there, out of reach, and ready to be used. Something that felt natural.”

Kakashi nods, slowly, and then shrugs. “True.” He shoots Naruto a look. “You pushed some down my throat earlier.” He hesitates, and then adds. “It tasted vaguely different.”

Naruto shrugs, rather unperturbed. “I am different now.” He stares into space for a long moment, and then shrugs again. “Kurama is different.” He snickers. “I have you know that Kurama is beyond annoyed with me… for having sex instead of trying the new mode out. It’s apparently something of a fabled state for the bijous.”

Kakashi snorts. “Well, I mean, I never heard of it before?”

Naruto shakes his head once. “So many secrets, in regards to them, and us, all based on the fact that they were subjugated, viciously. Imagine what we could have done if we had worked together all this time.”

 

They are silent for a long moment.

 

Kakashi eventually asks, a question that has been twisting in him, for a while now.

He makes his voice gentle, careful. “Naruto… why do you push chakra down my throat?” He lifts an eyebrow, quipping gently. “Health issues I do not know about?”

Naruto snorts. And then he ducks his head, moving in to hide his face in Kakashi’s throat. 

His words are muffled against Kakashi’s skin, sending goosebumps everywhere. “No, I…” He heaves a sigh, but his voice is a whisper. “I just thought that maybe, over time…”

Kakashi blinks, staring unseeing into space. Prompts, when Naruto doesn’t continue. “Maybe, over time?”

Naruto pushes his nose to Kakashi’s carotid. “Maybe, over time, it would help keeping you from aging. Until I have caught up at least.”

Kakashi blinks. 

 

His minds seems frozen, unable to think.

 

Naruto continues, his voice a harsh whisper now, full of pain. “I am going to be old, Kaka-kun. I am half Uzumaki, and now, with this regeneration… If I don’t get killed on the battlefield…” Kakashi makes an involuntary noise, and tightens his arms, and Naruto presses in, voice broken. “If I don’t get killed on the battlefield, I will outlive you. By decades. Maybe longer. And I…” He sobs once, his fingers pressing into Kakashi’s skin now, holding fast. “I don’t want to.”

 

Oh god.

 

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut.

 

He tries to quip, tries to keep his voice from shaking. “But who is going to babysit all our grandchildren?”

Naruto snorts, decidedly wobbly, while Kakashi’s throat and shoulder are getting wet. 

There’s a hiccup in Naruto’s voice now. “Still. I don’t want to.” He inhales, shakingly. “And yet I want to live, I want to see, I want to … babysit.” His voice lowers, until Kakashi cannot properly hear it anymore, but he feels it. “But I need you there. Or I will follow you.”

The world blurs, and then tracks down his face, to drip on the pillow.

 

He shakes his head, with an effort. “No. Please, you have to promise me, Naruto…”

Naruto interjects, with a vicious little laugh. “No.”

 

A beat, of both their hearts.

 

Naruto speaks up again, into the black hole that is in Kakashi’s chest. His voice is brittle, and yet firm, and sharp. “I will promise you anything, Kaka-kun, but not that.”

 

Kakashi sniffs, trying to speak past the constriction in his throat. “And… you think your chakra will help with that?”

Naruto pushes up suddenly, to lean on his elbow, staring down into Kakashi’s face.

Reaching up to wipe at the tears, unheeding of the ones on his own face. “I’ll take every chance we get.”

Kakashi nods, once, helplessly, and then pulls him down, and into a bruising kiss.

 

Unable to speak.

 

But he knows Naruto understands him just fine.

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

Sakura is looking… green around the gills.

 

Kakashi blinks at her, vaguely concerned, before sharing a look with Itachi. Who is also looking somewhat concerned. But also rather relaxed.

 

Ah.

 

Kakashi hesitates, and then reaches over and into his drawer, where he knows Naruto has put sweets. Sweets Kakashi doesn’t like… but Naruto does.

His little objection that this is the Hokage’s desk was only met with a snicker. He rummages around it for a moment, and then takes out a ginger one, hesitantly offering it to her. 

 

Sakura stares at it for a long moment, and then takes it, with a little sniff. “It’s so unfair. I don’t see Tenten or Hinata feeling sick all the time?”

Kakashi hums, watching her chew on the sweet very carefully. “I remember Kurenai had to be pulled off as well. It just… differs.”

Sakura shakes her head. “I do not wish to be pulled off. I’ll just…” She waves her hand, and then grins, for a moment, her pallor somewhat better. “I’ll just raid your stash when I’m here, Sensei.”

Kakashi chuckles, looking down into said stash with a little weigh of his head. “Well. It’s being refilled continuously, though you might need to fight for some of them with Naruto.” They share a chuckle and Kakashi sobers slowly, watching her. 

And then leans forward a bit, utterly sincere. “Congratulations, you two.” He looks over at Itachi, who ducks his head, just a bit, with the faintest blush. “I mean it.” He leans back, pointing a finger. “Also - good timing.”

Sakura snickers, obviously feeling better again, her eyes sparkling. “Thank you, Sensei.” She shares a warm smile with Itachi, reaching for his hand for a moment, before shrugging. “I figured there would be not much sense in waiting, now that a lot of the others follow Hinata’s and Tentens example.” She blinks. “Err, I mean, yours, and Naruto’s.”

Kakashi waves his hand. “Yes, I mean, there’s lots of kids incoming already.” 

Itachi speaks up, tone gentle but teasing. “And a huge wedding.”

Kakashi leans back, closing his eyes for a long moment. “And that, yes.” He snorts. “I have asked the other villages for support during that time. With an event like this there are literally not enough ninjas to guard anything around.”

He hesitates, and clicks his tongue, quirking an eyebrow. “Honestly, it would be the perfect opportunity.”

 

Itachi nods, but then shares a look with Sakura. “I hope they have more sense than that.”

Sakura laughs, gutturally, nodding. “Oh yes, can you imagine Naruto getting deprived of his wedding?”

Itachi grins at her, and Kakashi watches in fascination as his face softens, devotion bleeding in, and an almost painful, blinding love. He whispers, his nose scrunching. “I almost want to see it.”

Sakura leans in to him, sideways, her eyes wide and sparkling. “We would probably have to fight  him for a piece of their butts to fight ourselves.”

Itachi snickers, leaning closer to her as well. “We could just take the wedding cake and watch?”

 

Sakura bites her lips, leaning in a bit more, and Kakashi clears his throat, loudly, amusedly, sternly. Watching them fly apart, both somewhat red. 

He grins at them. “Anywhere else and I would have vanished, but I do need to finish the reports.”

Itachi scratches at his temple, somewhat sheepishly. “Sorry, Senpai. She’s just…” He trails off, beet-red now. 

Kakashi laughs, under his breath. “As I said, no need to apologize. I do know how it is.” He hesitates, and then quips, laughter in his voice. “At least you got married first.”

Sakura snickers, shaking her head once. “Yeah, but I can tell you that the easy way that you and Naruto are going about it has made a lot of the younger ninjas in the village relax considerately.”

Kakashi frowns. “What do you mean?”

Sakura shrugs, and then spreads her hands. “Just that there was always this unspoken expectation that you had to go, like, find your match, recognize the bond, have it engage, and then make it official, before anything else happens.” She hesitates, shooting a small smile at Itachi. “Before you actually live with someone. Get to know them.” They share a smile, and Sakura looks back, her tone wistful. “Living together can be hard, bond or not. We all are… our own things, our own persons. We all have traits and habits that may grate on our partners.” She clicks her tongue. “I have spoken with some of my patients, because they sometimes start to talk to me about it, and… a lot of people have this very ambivalent relationship to bonds… because you can get trapped in them, too.”

Kakashi snorts, and then pushes at the scrolls on his desk a bit, working his jaw. “I understand.”

Sakura nods, wildly. “Exactly, and even without the added difficulty of your bond, it’s…” She blinks, reaching out to take Itachi’s hand again. “It’s a good thing to find the way with as little pressure as possible.”

 

Kakashi exhales, and then leans back again, after reaching for and throwing her another ginger bonbon. “I see.” He hums, looking at Itachi. “I bet a lot of the elders see that differently.”

Itachi shrugs. “Bonds are personal, and binding, but marriages are official, and… political.” He snorts. “Of course they see it differently.”

Kakashi nods, slowly, while pulling a face. “Of course.” He inhales deeply, steepling his fingers. “What do they say to the incoming baby-boom?”

Itachi clicks his tongue, tone taking on a vicious undertone. “They think that the plans for the expansion of the childcare centers and academy are overrated, because they think the kunoichis will stay at home then.”

Kakashi nods, with a hum, his tone beyond dry. “Yeah. Fat chance.”

Sakura snickers, just a bit meanly.

Kakashi shares a look with her, and then looks at Itachi again. “So. What have you told them?”

Itachi shrugs, loftily, eyebrows raised. “I told them, that I would stay at home then. And I would make sure that every one of the fathers would be… encouraged to follow my example.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, with a little scoff. “And they don’t want that, do they.”

Itachi’s dark eyes glitter. “No.”

 

Sakura speaks up, tone dry. “I destroyed a table at home, because I was pissed when Itachi told me.” She grimaces, shooting Itachi a look. “Sorry about that, honey.”

Itachi waves at her. “No worries.” He smirks, and then looks back at Kakashi. “To be honest, I wasn’t even half mad - I had expected this.” He shrugs, ignoring Sakura’s sour face. “We have broken up the old rules, the old structures. We have laid Konoha bare with our efforts, with the winds of change these bring… and of course some people will cling to the remnants of those structures, because they mistake them for security. But true change can only come if you let go of the past. If we continue to wallow in what was…” He trails off.

 

Kakashi hums, continuing for him. “…then we can never find the future.”

Sakura nods, holding out her hand for another bonbon. “Yes.” She lightly pats her stomach. “And we can’t have that.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 63: You took the words right out of my mouth

Notes:

Song of chapter title by Meatloaf.
God knows why, but that scene just clicked into place *shrugs*
Also - I wanted to write more teasing, but… it became deep instead. Oh well :))))

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

 

They’ve put up huge tents, just outside the village limits.

The village itself swarms with guests and helping hands, and traders, from all over.

State guests, and personal ones, and their entourages.

 

Only Kaguya’s… friends missing now.

 

Kakashi snorts, darkly, turning a page in Icha Icha, which he is holding in front of his face, unseeing. 

 

He is sitting up in a tree, during his lunch break, while Naruto is… over there, with his parents. Doing god-knows-what-but-something-Kakashi-wasn’t-supposed-to-know. 

Now, Kakashi could have just gone on, and for lunch with Iruka and Obito, maybe.

But then he wouldn’t have had so much fun.

 

Because Naruto is glowering at him, every time he and his parents are passing by underneath, carrying… something under a blanket… and Minato looks like he is about to have a laughing fit.

 

Strange thing, that.

To be able to recognize the bubbling mirth in him by now, something that Kakashi had never been able to, before.

But he sure as hell can see it now, boiling beneath the almost serene surface, and fired up relentlessly by Kushina’s ecstatic directions, spurning them on.

It’s not that Kakashi reaaaalllllyyyy wants to know what these three are cooking up. He’ll find that one out soon enough. The day after tomorrow, to be precise.

But it is hilarious to watch them try to keep it from him.

 

Kakashi guesses he will pay for this, later.

He is definitely looking forward to that.

 

 

A puff of smoke, and then Pakkun is there, sitting in front of his outstretched and crossed legs, licking his snout. “Boss.”

Kakashi hums, keeping his unseeing eyes on the book, and his voice very low. “Have you finished what I asked you to?”

Pakkun nods. “Yes. We oversaw the tasks ourselves. It’s very nice.”

Kakashi swallows, while his heart hammers in his throat suddenly. “Yeah, it is, isn’t it.” He winks at Pakkun. “Did you like the space I reserved for you?”

Pakkun grins, for just a moment. “Very much.”

Kakashi grins at him. “Good.”

 

A displacement of air, and an Anbu, hovering on the next branch over. “Rokudaime. They are back.”

Kakashi nods, dismissing the Anbu, and then slowly closes his book, with a very fake sigh. “Duty calls.”

Pakkun snorts. “You were waiting for them.”

Kakashi very lightly and affectionately swats him with the book. “Maybe?”

Pakkun’s smirk broadens. “And you came here just to annoy Naruto a bit.”

Kakashi snickers, and then shrugs. “Maybe?”

Pakkun chortles, and then shakes his head. “I’ll tell the others not to come by tonight.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, tone lofty. “Good idea.”

 

They grin at each other for a moment, and then Pakkun is gone in another puff of smoke, and Kakashi vanishes, rushing over to the gate with a burst of chakra.

 

And drops down, right in front of them.

 

Sasuke’s purple eyes twinkle, the weight of the gaze in them surprisingly light. “A welcoming committee, Kakashi, nice.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow at him, seeing Hanabi elbow Sasuke from the corner of his eyes as he turns to Jiraiya and Tsunade. “I heard you were aware of the timeframe.” He gestures over to the side, and they follow him, choosing the shade of a tree to stand under.

Tsunade lowers her backpack, her hazel eyes twinkling. “Naruto told us before we left. The shorter timeframe actually helped.”

Kakashi tilts his head. “Oh?”

Jiraiya hums, stretching. “Yes, Amegakure was… not overly happy to house the two of us within its limits. I mean, we do have history there.” He shares a look with Tsunade, before he shrugs. “Still, they were interested in negotiations with us. And…” He lifts his eyebrows, to turn to Karin, who had been standing with Neji a bit sideways and off. “And they were very impressed with Karin’s knowledge and intellect. They have a lot of engineers and scientists in Amegakure, and the level they were discussing on was frighteningly high at times.”

Karin blushes a bit, pushing her glasses up. “It was fun?”

Jiraiya’s grin is feral. “Fun, yes.” His dark eyes find Kakashi’s. “Hanabi learned a lot from the negotiations I believe. But we sent you the reports already.”

Kakashi nods. “Yes. Our own industrial companies have indicated interest.” He hesitates, quirking an eyebrow, his voice low. “Did you find what we were looking for?”

Hanabi speaks up, her clear voice careful but sure. “Yes. But apart from the light those ruins only serve as building blocks for the city now. They have long since removed that what was within that structure.”

Kakashi hums, sending a look to Karin. “And that is where you came in?”

Karin smirks, for a moment. “Indeed.” She exhales, with a shake of her head. “But we will need more engineers, and exchanges with them.” She shares a look with Neji, who squeezes her hand. “For now, I have invited their engineers over to my lab. A lot of them were frightened and… excited beyond measure to be able to work in Orochimaru’s lab.”

Kakashi snorts. “I can imagine.”

Karin hums. “The technology in Amegakure is not solely technical - there are biological aspects to it. We knew that from the Pains, and the black rods, et cetera. However, I was surprised how deeply the combination and the acceptance of that combination runs for them. They supplement their bodies with it, even, for medical reasons. Which is beyond fascinating for me.”

Kakashi frowns, sharing a look with Tsunade. “Hanzo the Salamander did that, didn’t he? Why… why is that surprising?”

Tsunade steps up to him, her voice low. “We now know what the black Zetsu actually was… or, better, how we can use it.”

Kakashi blinks, with a frown. “I thought Kaguya’s will was shaped into that thing.” And Sakura absorbed it.

Karin steps up, too, her voice a whisper. “Yes, but now we know why and how it can be combined with flesh. How and why it could be… programmed to do things.”

Kakashi works his jaw. “Programmed.” And Sakura reprogrammed them?

Karin nods. “Yes.” She shares a look with Tsunade. “As I said, it’s fascinating. It intersects with my research, and Orochimaru’s, too. You should offer him to… use it, for his own… goal.”

Kakashi levels her with a hard stare. “You know of it?”

Karin blinks. “Of course?”

Kakashi nods, more to himself. Of course. He sighs. “Alright. We can talk about all that later. For now…” He nods at Hanabi and Sasuke, who have been conversing low-key during their discussion. “For now you should probably get organized for the wedding.” He clicks his tongue. “I think the others will have my literal hide if I interfere with their plans.”

 

Sasuke shoots him an amused look. “Oh, I can tell you that you already did when you sent us off. But Naruto was still discussing things with the others… he almost literally wanted to pull his hair out.”

Hanabi snickers.

Kakashi nods, with a grimace. “Great. Noted.”

Sasuke laughs, silently. “I bet you’ll hear about that at some point, at length.”

Kakashi sighs. “I went and totally annoyed him today, by placing myself in the way of whatever he is planning on top.”

Jiraiya chortles, heartily clapping Kakashi’s back. “I see you still like to live dangerously.” He leans in eyes sparkling. “Or are you just sharpening the rewards…”

Kakashi colors, shooting him a skunk-eye, but Jiraiya just laughs, starting off down the street.

Tsunade looks after him, a faint smile on her lips, before stepping up to Kakashi. “We need to talk a bit, later.” Kakashi blinks, instantly sober again, giving her a curt nod. “Alright. Whenever you are ready.”

Tsunade nods, and then puts her hand onto his shoulder, for just a moment. “I’ll come by before the wedding, ok? I’d like to explain and… give you my gift then.”

Kakashi frowns, staring at her, a vague shiver down his spine. “Okay…”

She squeezes his shoulder, and then steps past him as well, and after Jiraiya.

Kakashi watches her go for a moment, trying to pinpoint what has him so unsettled.

 

Karin steps up, dispelling the thought, her red eyes bright and happy. “Rokudaime. I’ll return home as well if that is alright? I have already written my report, maybe Neji and I can present it tomorrow?” She shares a quick look with Neji, who nods. “We can discuss the details then, but ultimately there is nothing that cannot wait till after the wedding.” Her nose scrunches as she grins. “Or, better, weddings.”

Kakashi nods, and then addresses Neji. “Hinata and Tenten have replaced the Hyuuga complex with wedding planning central. Good luck.”

Neji snorts, shaking his head, and it strikes Kakashi suddenly, to see him so… happy, eyes sparkling. 

Neji nods, with a grin. “I’m prepared.” He smirks. “Rokudaime.”

Kakashi nods and Neji takes Karin’s hand, and they saunter off, but not before her sleeve slips a bit, revealing a new bite.

Kakashi frowns. 

 

Hanabi speaks up, drawing his attention. “I believe the Godaime will explain everything.”

Kakashi blinks, staring into her eyes for a moment before he rolls his shoulders, shaking his head. “Alright. Keep you secrets for now.” He points his finger. “I hope you know what to wear already, because otherwise Naruto will know.”

Sasuke hisses, through clenched teeth. “Right.”

Hanabi swats him, just lightly. “Yes, we do, Rokudaime. Thank you for reminding me though, I need to buy shoes!” She claps her hands.

Sasuke blinks, and then shoots a long-suffering look at Kakashi. “Help?”

Kakashi snorts, and then starts to chuckle, deeply. “Nuh uh.”

Sasuke narrows his eyes at him, voice deeply amused. “Traitor.”

Kakashi shakes his head at him, and there’s this moment between them suddenly, this moment that slots everything into place.

 

Kakashi swallows, and then steps up to hug him, clapping his back, before withdrawing again, with a sniff. “Welcome home.” He winks at Sasuke. “We’ll be family in two days.”

Sasuke clicks his tongue, while reaching for Hanabi’s hand. “Yes. We will be.” 

 

Hanabi speaks up, beaming up at him. “No, we already are.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

Iruka runs his hands over Kakashi’s lapels, for the umpteenth time. 

Kakashi lightly swats his hands away, voice gentle but amused. “They’re fine. They’re spotless. Hell, I am spotless.”

Obito pipes up, lazily lounging on Kakashi’s couch. “You look weird with your hair so…”

Iruka’s voice has a biting undertone. “Fine?”

Obito blinks, and then confirms. “Yes?”

Iruka grumbles, under his breath.

Kakashi shares an amused look with Obito. “You know, one could think you’re the groom.” He tilts his head. “Why are you not marrying with us by the way… don’t tell me Naruto hasn’t asked?”

Iruka hums, weighing his head. “Of course he did.” He glowers at Kakashi for a moment, while his fingers are still hovering over Kakashi’s lapels. “But I…” He shrugs. “I think I want our ceremony to be in the Uchiha temple.”

Kakashi blinks, shooting Obito a look, who gazes back solemnly. “I see.”

Iruka turns his head, to look at Obito, before addressing Kakashi again, tone dry. “I think we also deserve to have you cater to us that day.”

Kakashi snorts, and then starts to laugh, with a shake of his head. “Definitely.”

Obito gets up with a sigh, and then bodily drags Iruka away, back to the sofa with him. “And besides, I believe it would be good for opening the Uchiha complex again a bit more… don’t you think?”

 

Kakashi opens his mouth to answer, but there is a knock on the door, and he answers it instead. “Come on in.”

Tsunade comes in, dressed in flowing robes, quite different to her usual self.

She looks him up and down. “Nice.”

Kakashi blushes, just a bit. “Yeah, well.” He points his thumb. “Iruka made sure I’ll be peak groom.”

Tsunade chuckles, and then nods at Iruka and Obito, her voice soft. “Would you give us five minutes?” She lifts her eyebrows. “I promise I won’t ruin your work.”

Iruka grunts, opening his mouth, but Obito shakes his head, dragging him out of the room by his hand. “Sure!” He rolls his eyes looking back at Kakashi when he closes the door and Kakashi chuckles to himself, with a shake of his head.

Tsunade hums, her eyes warm. “Iruka-san seems more nervous than you.”

Kakashi nods, and then shrugs. “Yeah, it’s quite funny.” He clicks his tongue. “I mean… what could I possibly be nervous about?”

Tsunade smirks, tone suffused with affection. “Indeed.”

 

Kakashi nods, and then hesitates, before sobering. “So?”

Tsunade inhales deeply, and Kakashi half-expects her to deflect, but she doesn’t her eyes calm now, and grave. “Did you see the bite mark on Karin’s wrist?”

Kakashi nods. “Yes. What happened?”

Tsunade smiles, a wistful, gentle smile. “Nothing much. It’s just that… for all my energy and regenerational powers… the wound in Jiraiya’s chest can not be properly healed.”

Kakashi frowns. “The old wound?”

Tsunade nods. “Yes, it damaged his heart, as you probably know. I managed to give him some time, but it’s…” She trails off.

Kakashi swallows, feeling the pang of pain, deeply. 

His voice is a croak. “Why…” Why do you tell me this now? Today?

Tsunade hums. “I have come to a decision.” She places her hand onto Kakashi’s chest, over his heart. “This is my… no our gift for you, and Naruto, who has come to me a while ago, discussing certain fears with me.” Kakashi’s heart gives a painful thud and Tsunade smirks, quirking an eyebrow. “It is a gift that I know will benefit Konoha more than anything else I have to give.”

Kakashi shakes his head, his throat closed off. “No, please, I…”

Tsunade shushes him. “Shhh. I always knew that eventually even my regeneration would stop.” She winks at him. “But no worries. I’ll keep my looks till the end.” 

Kakashi swallows, blinking rapidly, the world blurry.

Tsunade exhales. “Already, I can sense the change in your cells, by his chakra. He must give it to you regularly. Now… allow me to power it up.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. “I… can’t…?”

 

Tsunade grins, nose scrunched. “Yes you can, and you will. I take no ‘no’.” She inhales, deeply. “This is my gift to you, Hatake Kakashi. For all the years you waited, for all the years you fought through pain, and heartbreak, for his agency, and your own, for this village. From one kage to another. From one ninja to another.” She tilts her head, hazel eyes moist now, but light, so light. “From one friend, to another.”

The world wavers, and then clears, as a tear tracks down Kakashi’s cheek. 

There’s warmth now, flowing into him, and he doesn’t have to look down to know she’s pushing energy into him, energy that tingles through him, reaching, reaching, tickling, burning, shaping.

 

Energy, that feels fresh.

 

She steps back after a moment, with a little stumble, and he catches her, pulls her into an embrace, holding on tightly, unable to talk, his face wet.

Tsunade holds him for a long moment, and then steps back, reaching up to pull his mask down.

Her eyes track Kakashi’s face, and then an expression spreads on hers that he cannot place, a mix of delight and sorrow, of loss and triumph, of pride and acceptance.

Her voice is a whisper. “Oh, he’ll love that.” 

Kakashi sniffs. 

Tsunade hisses suddenly, eyes wide. “Uh, oh, Iruka is going to kill me, I ruined your hair.”

Kakashi blinks. “What?”

Tsunade grins, but her tone is still a bit apologetic. “They’ve grown. And they’re pretty wild now.”

Kakashi snorts. And then quips, his voice broken. “Better stay out of his way then.”

Tsunade chuckles, with a sniff of her own. “Yeah, I better.”

 

He squeezes her tightly once more and then releases her, watching her go towards the door, with careful steps.

He calls after her, softly. “How… long?”

She looks back, over her shoulder, and then shrugs, but the sparkle is back in her eyes. “Oh, a while yet. I do want to see those children, right?”

 

She winks at him and is gone, and he stands there, alone for a moment, feeling weird, and unable to look at himself in the mirror, feeling the slight changes, and the way his body moves.

 

He pulls up his mask with shaking fingers. 

 

Right.

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

Iruka’s hand is in the small of his back, holding. Obito is on the other side. Just there.

But it is enough. It is good.

 

Kakashi’s heart is beating in his throat.

 

He can see it is the same for Tenten, and Sasuke, and Shikamaru, who all chose his side of the waiting, their little group a silent, and tense affair by now. 

Though Neji is trying so hard to hide his amusement, here as Tenten’s escort, while Kankuro does not hide his own. 

Itachi is here, too, for Sasuke, quietly fuzzing over him, to Kakashi’s unending personal delight. 

 

How far we’ve come, after all this time.

 

He swallows, staring unseeing ahead.

 

 

Jiraiya’s voice booms, the big Sannin entering the little room with all the aplomb of a bulldozer. “Ahhhh here we have you guys… feeling like throwing up yet?”

Tenten rolls her eyes, while the others just glower silently.

Jiraiya cackles, and then rubs his hands, looking weirdly out of place in his usual attire. 

Kakashi nods at him. “Tsunade didn’t manage to get you into a suit?”

Jiraiya scoffs. “The only other clothes I’ll wear are reserved for funerals.” He grins, broadly. “But I could just take them off if you’d prefer?” He waggles his eyebrows, and Kakashi tries not to blush, ignoring the amused glances by the people around. 

Jiraiya ignores them, one hand reaching up to pull gently at Kakashi’s hair. “I see it worked.”

Kakashi swallows, locking his gaze with his. “I couldn’t dissuade her.”

Jiraiya smirks, his gaze wandering over Kakashi’s visible face, and body. “Good.”

 

Itachi speaks up, one arm around Sasuke. “I remember you like this… but then you always looked too young.”

Kakashi snorts, sending him a look. “Look who’s talking.”

They smirk at each other for a moment, decades of pain unspoken and there, for an instant, in the wry smile. 

Itachi nods, tone soft. “And now, we’ll be family soon. A chosen family.” Kakashi can see Sasuke swallow. 

Jiraiya looks over his shoulder, through the door. “ETA 10 minutes.”

Tenten exhales, loudly. 

Shikamaru grumbles, under his breath. “This shouldn’t be so annoying, should it?”

Kankuro slaps his back, tone dripping with amusement. “Just wait until Gaara makes even more excuses.”

Kakashi snorts. He shares a look with Iruka, and Obito, who had both regarded him a bit weirdly after Tsunade’s visit, but hadn’t asked.

Obito looks a bit wistful. 

 

Tenten turns suddenly, twirling on the spot. “Ugh, I have all this energy, and I…” She places her hand onto her stomach, and then halts, with a gasp. “Oh.” Her eyes come up to Kakashi. “They kick.”

Kakashi smiles, suddenly, brilliantly, widely, unable to cope with the sudden rush of endorphins. “They… do?”

Tenten waves him over, and Jiraiya shoves him, just a bit.

Kakashi glowers at him, but sniffs, and Tenten takes his hand, places it onto the side of the moderately sized bump.

Pressure, against his palm, for an instant. 

Kakashi swallows. “Oh.”

Tenten beams at him. “And here.” She moves his hand, and there is another kick, gentle, through flesh, and weird, the sensation and realization of beings, alive, in there sudden and breathtaking.

Kakashi exhales a shuddering breath. 

Tenten nods, suddenly quite unmoored as well, lips quivering. “I know, right?”

Kakashi looks at her, at her pretty face, at the big brown eyes, at the beautiful hairdo. 

He shakes his head once, suddenly vaguely embarrassed. “I… never asked… Do you…” mind?

 

Tenten blinks at him, and seems to know, because suddenly she smiles, beatifically, and then moves in to hug him, just like that.

She shakes her head against his chest. “Carrying your children has been the best experience so far. And I cannot wait to see them, to share this with Hina, and Naruto… and you.” She draws a bit back and looks up, with the faintest blush. “I mean… I know of you, Rokudaime, and I know your skills, but I…”, her eyes drift for a moment, looking around the room. “The way we are all interconnected, and the way Naruto is so happy now…” She grins suddenly, nose scrunching. “I look forward to seeing if some of the stories are true.”

Kakashi blinks, and releases her when she steps back. 

He drawls a bit, for effect. “Stories?”

Tenten blushes, but smirks, almost ferally.

 

And Kakashi can suddenly see her in her relationship with Hinata, see the way they match. 

He inhales, deeply. 

 

And nods at Neji, who is watching, silently, the space on his forehead that used to carry the seal gleaming in the light. “You and Tenten should lead.”

Tenten blinks, but it is Iruka who interjects, somewhat apologetically. “Tradition should be upheld a bit, don’t you think.” He shares a look with Obito, who is frowning. “You are the ruling kage, you need to lead.”

Kakashi shakes his head once. “No. She carries the future, and Neji carries our will to change and shape that future.” He locks his gaze with Neji’s for an instant, Neji raising his head, just a bit. “They will go first.”

Jiraiya’s voice drips with amusement and glee. “The daimyo will be so irritated.”

Kakashi turns to him, shares a grin, but locks his gaze with Sasuke’s then, for a moment, sees the almost imperceptible nod. “You and Itachi, after.” He nods at Shikamaru. “And then you and Kankuro.” Surprisingly, Shikamaru doesn’t groan.

He turns back to Tenten. “I will go last.”

Tenten grimaces, and then shifts to her other foot. “Sure?”

Kakashi chuckles, and then draws her in again, for an instant. “Yes.”

 

Jiraiya smirks at him, the dark eyes twinkling rather suspiciously, and then gesticulates at the large hall, where commotions can be sensed. Where Naruto is, somewhere.

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long moment.

 

Iruka links his arm through his, silently. 

Obito is there, on his other side.

Jiraiya places a hand between his shoulder blades, silently.

 

Kakashi reopens his eyes, and exhales.

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

It’s a blur.

 

 

 

A blur that’s drowned in blue, and champagne.

 

 

In too many hugs, and too many smiles, his face hurting from smiling so much.

In giggles, and teasing, and a whirlwind of emotions.

 

 

In that moment when Naruto had pulled down Kakashi’s mask to kiss him… and had started crying instead, almost pitifully.

In Kakashi wrapping himself around him, right there, in the first row, not giving a single damn.

 

In Kushina and Minato, holding them, quietly.

 

 

They’d made a mess of the schedule.

 

Nobody had given a single damn.

 

 

 

Naruto is plastered to him now, eyes puffy and red, not quite his usual self.

Kakashi doesn’t quite feel like himself either.

 

There’s a sense of unrealism that permeates everything, from Kaguya’s gentle smile, to the daimyo’s exuberant speech. Or Gaara’s tight hug.

 

Gaara, who had offered signed treaties to the daimyo, successfully blindsiding him.

Shaping the future, considerably.

 

And then there’s Karin, who is once more seeming to present the trifold goddess with Kushina and Yui, something that tugs at Kakashi when he sees them deep in conversation. And who seems so happy, there in Neji’s arms.

Mei had been there, too, listening, in Guy’s lap.

 

Guy, who had been so happy he could barely talk, his long, long speech overflowing with emotions. And pride, beaming at Tenten.

 

And a bit later there had been Jiraiya and Minato, grinning at him when they share one of those break-apart popsicles.

Naruto had started crying again, at seeing that.

 

And Jiraiya had come over then, to pull him from Kakashi’s arms, and into a big hug, just holding. 

 

Healing.

 

Obito had taken the moment to drag Kakashi over, to Iruka and Sakura, and Itachi. 

And shots.

 

There had been this moment, when Kakashi had looked at Iruka. And then at Obito.

And it had thudded.

 

Sora had interrupted then, demanding her own shot. And a hug.

Teasing them, mercilessly, with innuendos, until they had gathered a crowd around them, until the laughter and teasing had been ferocious.

 

At some point he’d danced with Hinata, and then with Tenten. 

 

Hanabi… had danced on the tables instead.

With Konohamaru.

 

Who had then decided to do a henged striptease, that Naruto had joined in, to Jiraiya’s booming laughter.

Of course. 

 

Kakashi had turned his head amidst the hooting and cajoling, and had watched Sasuke and Itachi hug, over at the bar. 

 

 

A sweaty and exuberant Naruto had barreled into him then, kissing him until nothing else existed.

 

Kisses him until the past had dropped away, leaving only him, and now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reality drops, with gravity.

 

Kakashi breaks the kiss, reaches up with shaking fingers, to draw a finger along a fine brow.

He doesn’t care anymore that his mask is down, nor the gasps around when people see him.

 

The light glints off Naruto’s eyelashes, and Kakashi gasps, lowering his head to Naruto’s. 

 

Breath, breath, between them. Just breathe.

 

And the thundering and burning, of everything.

 

 

 

Thumping, rapid thumping.

 

At first he thinks it is his heart.

 

 

And then Naruto snickers, withdrawing a bit.

Reaches out, to scratch Pakkun’s head. “Hey guys!”

 

Kakashi is on his knees before he realizes he’s bending them, his arms full of family.

 

Over the heads of happily yipping dogs his eyes find Iruka’s for a moment, and he sniffs, addressing his pack softly. “You know, by the way, we should make Iruka kin, too.” He looks up and back at Naruto, who just fondly shakes his head at him.

Shiba bumps into him, and then yawns. “Ah… given that you and he were like…”

Kakashi blinks. “Like?”

Pakkun rolls his eyes. “We already recognize him as kin.”

Kakashi exhales, deeply, just a bit… relieved. “You do?”

A voice behind them, a bit flabbergasted and definitely emotional. “You do?”

Pakkun grins up at Iruka. “Of course?”

Naruto pulls Iruka in, hugging him within an inch of his life. “Of course.”

 

Kakashi laughs, as Naruto pulls Iruka down into the pile as well.

 

 

 

For a moment the wedding and the party and the people drop away, and Obito is there, too, and it’s cozy, and there’s hair everywhere, and…

 

Kakashi inhales, shakily.

 

 

 

Calls now, calls from the tables, calling them back.

 

Neji is there, with a sweaty and happy looking red-faced Hanabi inhaling a big glass of water next to him, and up on the tables with her. 

Holding out a glass.

 

And the crowd is chanting for a toast.

 

It’s Sasuke who reaches down for Naruto’s hand, drags him out of the dog-cuddle-pile. “Up, Usuratonkachi - Neji wants to address us all.” Sasuke grins, and it transforms his whole face, makes him seem even younger than he is, and a whole other person. He nods at Kakashi. “Can you get up by yourself, old man?”

Kakashi grunts, and then flips him the bird, and Sasuke laughs out loud, while Naruto pushes up and falls right into an embrace with him, an embrace that is painfully intimate for a moment.

 

And it doesn’t matter.

It doesn’t hurt.

 

 

It’s just beautiful.

 

 

Naruto reaches back for Kakashi’s hand, and then drags them both over where the crowds are gathered, some clapping rhythmically already, while Neji waits still, with a smirk.

 

 

They end up in a group with Hinata and Tenten, too, who had been dancing together slowly, and Shikamaru and Temari, who are hopping onto a table now, looking up as well. 

Kakashi squeezes Naruto’s hand, draws his finger along the fine skin.

For a moment his eyes find Kaguya’s, pale and serene in the background.

 

Neji clears his throat. “Alright, so…” Clapping, and Neji shakes his head, waits till the noise has calmed down a bit again. 

Laughter, when Kiba hollers over: “Are you done yet?”

Neji waves at him, dismissively, but smirks, with a shake of his head.

 

He raises his glass. “Long ago, I thought that paths were set, that the cages we were born into would always exists, keep us safely in place.” Silence now, as his words trickle down, the huge hall with hundreds of people listening suddenly, only some clinking of glasses heard. 

Neji licks his lips. “Especially with the bonds”, his eyes find Karin’s for a long moment, before continuing. “Especially with the bonds it seemed all settled, all done.” He inhales deeply, and then toasts them, his eyes locking with Naruto’s. His voice is low, and the room quiets even more, as everybody tries to her. “Our bonds are intricate. Or family is tightly connected, especially now. But I say our bonds specifically, because you fought to make me, and others, realize their agencies. You not only have a mythological and deep bond with Sasuke, Naruto, and of course the fate bond with our Rokudaime, no, you also have now a biological bond with Hinata… and Tenten.” 

Neji quirks an eyebrow. “And you have one with me.” Absolute silence, you could hear a pin drop. “When you made me realize that my seal didn’t define me you set my soul free… when your mother removed the seal, it was a promise come true.”

Kakashi blinks, finding Kushina’s eyes in the crowd of to the side for a long moment.

She smirks back at him.

 

Neji clicks his tongue. “I think we all know that you will be our Hokage someday…” He chuckles. “For better or for worse.”

Laughter, and Naruto pulls a face, exaggeratedly, before sticking his tongue out, to another round of laughter. Kakashi pulls him in, tightly.

Neji ducks his head. “No, really, but I am looking forward to it.” He raises his eyes again, the wide lilac eyes incredibly vulnerable. “You keep your promises.”

Sasuke sniffs, quietly.

Neji nods, once, and then points at Sasuke. “Exactly. Naruto keeps his word.” He shakes his head once, and then continues, tone beyond dry. “Against all odds, and opposition, and wisdom…”, laughter now, and snickers, “… and, quite often, common sense…” Naruto glowers at him, more or less mockingly. 

Neji grins and then sobers, slowly, addressing the crowd. “I asked him once if he knew what carrying a seal meant.” He snorts. “I was very hurt then, and… pissed off.” He rolls his eyes. “After the chunin exams, don’t blame me.” Snickers. Neji smirks, and then clicks his tongue. “But what a stupid question.”

Silence again, as Naruto’s face grows sober slowly, and vulnerable. Kakashi swallows silently.

Neji quirks an eyebrow, before he looks at Kakashi. “Carrying a seal is a burden. A burden that’s drenched in responsibility and the literal negation of agency.”

Neji hesitates, and then points a finger at Naruto and then at Kakashi. “I was freed of mine. You… you made it your own.”

Naruto trembles, in Kakashi’s arm. The tattoo pulses, in time with his heart.

Neji nods, once, and then turns his head, to look at Hanabi, who is looking at him, through tears, radiant in her wedding gown. “Only good can come from all of this, I am certain.” Hanabi giggles, through tears, and then leans in to hug him, impulsively. 

Neji chuckles, trying to keep his balance, and the balance of the glass he is holding up. “So my toast is this, actually… to fates entwined and futures seized - we may fight again, but always for each other.”

 

Kakashi closes his eyes.

 

A roar, as applause and yells rise, and swell, and as Hanabi jumps down, and into Sasuke’s arms.

 

Clinking, as someone hits a glass with a spoon, repeatedly.

 

Kakashi reopens his eyes, to see it is Gaara, who has stepped in front of Naruto, but faces to the side, where Shikamaru and Temari are standing.

 

Gaara holds up his hand. “Just another quick one, I promise.”

Good natured groans, and Gaara blinks, with the faintest little smile. 

He raises his own glass. “I second all that Neji-san has said.” He blinks up, locks gazes with Neji for a long moment. “But I need to address something more as well.” He hesitates, and then turns just slightly, to include Naruto in his address. 

He inhales, deeply. “Neji-san has spoken of fates and seals, and… we all know how I was, back then.” He hesitates. “Why I was what and who I was, back then.”

He clicks his tongue, the crowd now silent, waiting. “I was a real menace. Brutal, hurting, vicious. My… siblings did not have an easy childhood.” He swallows. “And yet, they persevered… maybe to keep up with my antics, who knows…” There is no laughter, the joke bittersweet and received as such. 

Gaara sighs. “Temari went and became the strongest wind user, besides Naruto at least.” Gaara rolls his eyes a bit, and then winks at Naruto. “Though we should probably pull you out of all the lists.”

Naruto pouts and Gaara chuckles, before he turns back, and then steps up to Temari, who stands next to Shikamaru, off to the side. 

He lifts his glass. “I rarely saw you smile, when we were little. But now…” He smirks, and it transforms his whole face, the little laugh lines emerging, eyes sparkling. “But now you do.” 

Gaara laughs once, and then toasts Shikamaru. “And not just today, and it’s your efforts that make her happy, your presence. Your love. Thank you.”

Kakashi swallows, and then leans forward a bit, to get a good look of Shikamaru, who seems a bit thunderstruck. 

Up and until his father, Shikaku, slaps him heartily on the back, with a short laugh, and then pulls him and Temari into an embrace.

Gaara exhales, and then turns a bit in a slow circle, including them all. 

His voice is the tiniest bit wobbly. “To family.”

 

And there is an echo, by hundreds of voices. “To family.”

 

 

And Naruto squeezes his hand.

 

 

 

 

 

Food now, food and laughter, and drink, and too many hands to shake to remember, too many hugs.

 

Hands. 

 

Kakashi blinks, something about…

 

 

Jiraiya hops onto the bar, sake bottle in hand, effectively dispelling the thought. 

And Jiraiya snickers.

 

Uh oh.

 

Kakashi smirks, and then leans back in his chair, bracing himself. 

Naruto shuffles up to him with his own chair, embraces him a bit sideways, with a whisper. “I’m kinda afraid?”

Kakashi nods, and then leans in, holding, his forehead laid against Naruto’s.

 

Jiraiya’s booming voice reaches them now, over the murmur of the crowd, and the music still playing, but which is faded out now, too, as silence descends. “One more speech!!”

Snickers and boos, and then shuffling, as people sit down.

Minato flops down next to Kakashi, and puts his arm around them, stretching his legs out with a sigh. He clicks his tongue, tone dry. “Uh oh.”

Kakashi smirks. “My sentiments exactly.”

 

Jiraiya points a finger at them. “You know I can hear you?”

Minato lifts the glass he has in the left hand, his face vaguely flushed. Hollering. “I sure hope so!”

Snickers, and Jiraiya waggles his eyebrows, expression sly.

 

He draws himself up to impressive height, and then hesitates, letting his eyes drift over the people all around.

His voice is surprisingly serious. “Friends, family, fellow ninjas and… our established leaders.” He offhandedly toasts the elders and the daimyo, with a smile that is so short of biting and disrespectful it makes Kakashi want to wince. 

Jiraiya grins broadly. 

He clicks his tongue. “They say that one should marry someone your own age because as your beauty fades, so will their eyesight.” Some chuckles around the room, and some gazes at them now, and Kakashi tries not to squirm, taking his strength from the connection to Naruto, and from the hand in his, and the arm holding them both.

Jiraiya smirks, continuing. “That doesn’t really pertain to them though, never has.” He nods at them. “Naruto was the result of the most beautiful couple I knew then, soul and body, and Kakashi…” Dead silence now, and Kakashi quietly clears his throat, feeling the tips of his ears burn. “And Kakashi was always very, very pretty under that mask, as I was honored at times to know. A few times.”

Whispers now, and Jiraiya cackles, raising his glass. “Well, somebody had to take care of him until Naruto was of age, right?” 

There is a loud groan by Tsunade, and loud whispers now, and giggling.

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, hearing Minato hiss and then cackle, under his breath.

Naruto hollers at Jiraiya, but there’s laughter in his voice, right next to the bite of it. “Ey, stop lusting after my husband, you old pervert!”

Laughter.

Jiraiya rolls his eyes. “Fine, fine, I’ll try. Besides, I’ve already given honor to him in my books, so…” Whistles around the room and Kakashi inhales deeply, feeling his face burn. 

Jiraiya nods at him, with a waggle of his eyebrows. “So, a small toast then: May all your ups and downs come only in the bedroom.”

Snickers again, like a wave, and Kakashi shoots him a dark look, and Jiraiya cackles, taking a swig of his drink. Minato mewls quietly, a bit pained.

 

Jiraiya’s voice is surprisingly sober when he continues. “I’ve known Kakashi for almost 20 years now – we’ve laughed together, cried together, and watched together over Naruto. I’ll never forget the time I watched from afar as Naruto showed him the plush…” A cackle by Sasuke now, just the tiniest bit vicious. 

Jiraiya inhales deeply, his dark, sly eyes passing over them. “Kakashi gave me hope.” He frowns, and Kakashi shivers, watching him, his mind empty. Naruto presses a kiss to his jaw. “After… after that fateful night so long ago, I did not dare to hope. He changed that. Kakashi managed to let Naruto live, and grow. And Naruto…” Jiraiya’s face softens, and the world blurs, as tears fall down Kakashi’s face, silently. “I’ve known Naruto for a long, long time now, too, and I can… honestly say I’ve never seen him as happy as he’s now. Naruto, you have such a big heart and you truly light up a room… but there is darkness in you also, darkness from fate and circumstance. And it matches his. And somehow, all that darkness… is made into light by the two of you, together.” He swallows, and then points at Minato, who watches him, a very vulnerable expression on his face. Kakashi turns his head just slightly, realizing for the first time that Kushina is standing behind Minato, with her hands on his shoulders. “Somehow, with your connection, you managed to bring people back, literally even. Bring them together.”

Jiraiya hesitates, and then points at Tsunade, and then at Sasuke, and over at Itachi. “Old souls, broken souls. Healing.” He nods at Obito, smiling for a moment at Iruka. “Old history, and pain, transformed.” He looks up, and over at Kaguya, who is watching, with a little smirk on her face, and then nods at Temari. “Enemies to lovers, and to friends.” He grins at Tenten and Hinata, and then at Sakura. “Breaking up old structures, and setting the paths for the future, in more ways than one.” He smiles. “Hope has paid off.”

 

It’s silent now, and Jiraiya lifts his bottle, silent for a long moment, before he continues, his voice light, and yet rough, eyes drifting over all of them. “So it is time to raise our glasses to the happy couples… I love you.”

 

Naruto inhales, shakily. 

Kakashi swallows, and then turns his head, to press a kiss to Naruto’s forehead. 

Jiraiya’s eyes find his, corners crinkling. “To marriage - the only war where you sleep with the enemy.” He hesitates, and then winks. “Well, outside undercover missions that is, in our cases.”

 

Kakashi snorts, and Naruto snickers, and they look at each other for a moment, before leaning in for a kiss, to applause, and hooting, and whistles, and Minato’s hand on his right shoulder.

And Kushina’s on his left.

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

Kurenai is sitting in a corner with the snoring Mirai on her lap, holding up a finger to her lips as he passes by.

Tenzou and Yugao are close to her, their children next to them, sprawled out on blankets in a corner, conversing quietly, and grinning up at him.

They’re one of the last ones, conversely, their kids had just dropped at some point and they’d taken to a quiet corner instead of going home, citing ‘not to want to miss this event’…

Kakashi blinks. This wedding.

 

 

His wedding.

 

 

He inhales, shudderingly, and then goes on, smirking at Ino and Sai still dancing slowly on the dance floor, without music, and without caring for anyone else.

Kiba and Shino are having a great time at the bar still with the rest of the available drinks, to the barkeepers obvious chagrin, but Hanabi has joined them at some point, Sasuke tugged along by her hand, and obviously a bit tipsy, too.

Konohamaru is taking pictures.

 

Giggling to himself.

 

 

Sasuke lifts his hand, rubs it over his face, obviously laughing at something and…

 

 

Kakashi stops, staring at it, at the palm. The empty palm.

 

 

Naruto speaks up, behind him, voice… Kakashi cannot place it. “It’s my gift to you.”

Kakashi blinks, and then turns around, with a frown. “Your gift?”

Naruto shrugs, and then moves in, arms going round Kakashi’s waist. “Yeah. I asked Kaguya to remove them.” He huffs, and then smirks, with another shrug. “I expected to feel differently, for him, for… everything, but I don’t, and I…” He clicks his tongue. “Still. I thought you’d like it maybe. I’m all yours.”

Kakashi stares at him, close distance now, their noses almost touching. His heart beats, hard, the reality of tonight and before and what’s to come suddenly heavy.

He swallows. “You shouldn’t have done that for me.” I was fine with it.

Naruto rolls his eyes a bit. “I know. Still. Kaguya says it was only a visual representation, so it’s not like, doing something, but I…” He exhales, and then leans in, whispering against Kakashi’s mouth. “And I think Hanabi appreciated the gesture as well.”

Kakashi hums, letting the precious energy rise, the heat between them.

 

Electricity, far beyond his lightning nature, and far more intense.

 

He inhales, deeply, deliberately, watching the way Naruto’s eyes darken.

Smiles, gently. “And now?”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow. “It’s our wedding.”

Kakashi smirks at him. “That it is… you really went and got yourself an old wolf.”

Naruto laughs, under his breath. “Not old.” He licks his lips. “And definitely not anymore.”

Kakashi hums, and then reaches up, feathering the tips of his fingers along Naruto’s jaw. Remembering an old song they were playing earlier. “Would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses?”

Naruto’s eyes flash, and he grins, broadly, before answering, correctly. “Will he offer me his mouth?”

Kakashi exhales. “Yes.”

Naruto leans in, whispering against Kakashi’s mouth. “Will he offer me his teeth?”

Kakashi opens his mouth, just a bit, sighing. “Yes.”

Naruto’s eyes crinkle at the corners, pressing a kiss to the corner of Kakashi’s mouth, before asking again. “Will he offer me his jaws?”

Kakashi tilts his head, just a bit, making Naruto giggle, before answering. “Yes.”

Naruto hums, and then drops a hand from Kakashi’s back to his ass, squeezing on the last word. “Will he offer me his hunger?”

Kakashi snorts, and then replies, laughter and arousal in his voice. “Yes.”

Naruto lifts his eyebrows, watching him intently now, while pressing closer. “Again, will he offer me his hunger?”

Kakashi lets him see. “Yes.”

Naruto blinks, slowly, and then smiles at him, almost gently. “And will he starve without me?”

Kakashi shivers, not caring if the sudden flash of need is in his voice or not. “Yes.”

Naruto swallows, sober suddenly, his voice almost small. “And does he love me?”

 

More than anything in the world.

 

Kakashi threads his fingers into gold, pressing their foreheads together. “Yes.”

Naruto echoes, so much feeling in the single word that Kakashi wants to burst. “Yes.”

 

They are silent for a moment, and then Naruto sniffs, and Kakashi exhales, some levity returning.

He smirks. “So. On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses?”

Naruto grins at him, broadly. “Yes.”

Kakashi leans in, nipping at his chin, nose scrunched, teasing heavily. “I bet you say that to all the boys.”

 

Naruto giggles, and then leans in, to claim his mouth. “No.”

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

Quick heads up: I'll take a break over the holidays here to finish this up properly, that one chapter is fighting me (guess my subconscious doesn't want it to end *laughs*) - just so you know. Will repeat it in the notes next week.

Chapter 64: The desire for more

Notes:

Err… don’t try this at home unless you know what you’re doing I guess.

Also: small (fic) vacation before the final chapters, bc with family etc I need the extra time for the last edits:)) Next post will be up on January 7th!
Happy Holidays to those of you celebrating and a happy New Years too!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

He watches as Tenten reaches for Hinata’s hand when they look up at the house, Hinata leaning in, silently.

 

Naruto’s reaches for his, while looking up at the one next to it.

 

And Kakashi exhales.

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

Naruto collapses on his chest, panting heavily, a furnace on Kakashi’s sweaty skin.

Kakashi tries to catch his breath, tries to breathe.

 

He swallows, almost gasping the words when there’s enough oxygen again, almost laughing. “I see you liked the surprise.”

Naruto mewls, and then pushes up, pressing back, making them both hiss. “Oh god yes.” He grins ferally, eyes sparkling, before looking up and around. “Though we should soundproof this room.”

Kakashi hums, feeling himself soften, slip out, to both their regret. “Probably, yes.”

Naruto bites his lips, tilting his head. “What do you think about connecting doors?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, and then reaches for Naruto’s soft and messy cock, pulling on it, expertly. “I could be convinced.”

Naruto cackles. “Oh?” He shifts, slipping off Kakashi’s hips, before helping him turn over, pull down his pants. “How much persuasion do you need?”

Kakashi grunts, and then tilts his hips up, letting the need come, fruitless, but purer by it. “As much as you think you have.”

Naruto snickers, and then rolls into him, just like that, taking his breath again, and his thought.

 

And everything is him.

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

Obito cackles, strutting into the room with Iruka on his heel. “Oh, Kaka-kun, marriage becomes you… you seem thoroughly fucked?” Obito holds up a hand. “In a good way I mean.”

Kakashi sends him a skunk-eye. And then replies, rather loftily. “Well. What can I say. Naruto has stamina.”

Obito snorts, and then shakes his head, shares a look with Iruka.

Who just sighs, but with an indulgent grin. “Kakashi, we…” He frowns, shooting a look at Shizune and Shikamaru, who are off to the side, holding folders and scrolls.. “Or, better, Rokudai…”

Kakashi interjects, with a sharp click of his tongue. “Don’t you dare.”

Iruka ducks his head for a moment, and then grins at him, before starting again. “Alright. Kakashi, we have managed to pick up the sword.” He hesitates, and then continues, eyes locked with Kakashi’s. “Suigetsu is back in Kirigakure?”

Kakashi nods. “Yes.” He looks at the wrapped sword that Obito is carrying. Looks back at Iruka. “Would you like to deliver it to Kirigakure yourself?”

Iruka shifts on his feet, makes a show out of having to think about it. “Sure.”

Obito narrows his eyes, obviously having heard something in the tone. 

Kakashi tries to hide his mirth. “Very well then. I’ll clear it with the council. Your soulmate has been very well-behaved after all…” Obito glowers at him, silently, and Kakashi cannot hide the humor in his voice. “…so I guess you can take on official missions now.”

Obito speaks up, eyes still slitted. “What are you two up to?”

Kakashi blinks, and then shares a very innocent look with Iruka. “Nothing?”

Obito grunts. “Uh huh.”

 

Iruka ducks his head, and then nods at Kakashi, before dragging Obito out.

 

Kakashi chuckles, under his breath.

 

Shikamaru speaks up, his dark eyes still on the door. “You’re sending Obito to Kirigakure?”

Kakashi smirks, sharing a look with Shizune. “Iruka wants to propose to him there.”

Shikamaru quirks an eyebrow. “I see… Why there?”

Kakashi hums, and then leans back in his seat, staring unseeing into the room. “Iruka said that Obito has expressed a regret that he spent so much of his life in caves, and in the dark, rainy wetness of Amegakure… in spring Kirigakure should be quite beautiful. And he heard about the waterfall that Hanabi danced in.”

Shizune hums, happily. “Oh yeah, everyone has heard about that by now.”

Shikamaru snorts. “Yes. I would never have taken Sasuke for a romantic, but here we are.”

Kakashi laughs, under his breath. “Yeah, life is a wild ride.” He looks up at Shizune. “You should go on a vacation with Anko during spring break, too… it’s been ages since you took time off.” He shares a look with Shikamaru. “We’ll be fine for a while.”

Shizune hesitates, and then looks at Shikamaru, who nods, before looking back. “Alright.” A slow smile spreads over her face. “Actually, Anko and I wanted to take a trip along some of the old hideouts of Orochimaru…”

Kakashi blinks, and then frowns. “Why?” Why-ever would you want to do that?

Shizune weighs her head. “Anko wants to free herself of it. We’ve been…” She grimaces, before continuing, shooting a look at Shikamaru. “We’ve been seeing a counselor at the new health center. He suggested we literally exorcise those demons, the memories, by revisiting.” She raises her eyebrows. “So… if we take off - we would need a longer time off.”

Kakashi nods, slowly, pushing at the scroll on his desk. “I see.” He clicks his tongue. “I can only support this. Exorcising demons is a good thing.”

 

Shikamaru speaks up, carefully. “I am sure my father would be pleased to teach me further.” He grimaces. “That will be so annoying.”

Kakashi snorts, and then looks up at him, letting the appreciation color his voice. “That would… work well.”

Shikamaru grunts. “I will need to clear it with Temari though, given that the hours would likely increase. Because…” He colors a bit, but raises his eyes to Kakashi’s. “Well. Our child will be a few months younger, but will probably run around with yours.”

Shizune squeals, and then hugs him, exuberantly, squeezing him within an inch of his life. “Ohhhh, I’m so happy for you!”

Shikamaru nods, and then claps her back, a bit awkwardly, before sighing, deeply. “She’s already told the Kazekage, and now there’s even more stuff arriving.”

Kakashi chuckles, and then stands up, to hug Shikamaru for a moment as well. “Yeah, well, enjoy it.” He steps back again, and waggles his eyebrows. “I have Minato, Kushina, Sora, Jiraiya and Tsunade… you’re not getting any pity from me.”

Shikamaru snorts, and then cackles, pressing his fingers into the bridge of his nose. “Right.” He sniffs, and then looks up, his posture relaxing a bit. “It’s just so overwhelming.”

 

Kakashi leans back on his desk, with a grin. “That it is, Shika, that it is.”

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Kakashi!”

 

He turns, eye-smiling at Kurenai and Mirai, who are skipping up to him. “Hey!”

He bends down and picks Mirai up, cuddling her for a moment, until she squirms and he puts her down again, looking up at Kurenai. “What’s up?”

Kurenai reaches out to run her hand through Mirai’s unruly hair for a moment, giving her a smile, and then reaches into the bag she is carrying. “I have something for you.”

Kakashi frowns, and then holds out his hand to receive the scrolls that she offers him. “What is it?”

Kurenai sighs, and then settles in the chair in front of his desk. “Scrolls he wrote before…” She looks away for a moment, and then back, with a brave smile. “They are for his team. And the purple one is for you.”

Kakashi hums, placing all except the purple one onto the desk, and turning that one in his hand. “Do you know…”

Kurenai nods. “Yes.” She grins at Kakashi for a moment. “He said he always knew you’d be Hokage one day, you know. And he said that if you were, you would need this information.”

Kakashi nods, staring down at it, and then looks up at Kurenai.

Who sighs. “It’s about Ino’s eye.”

Kakashi gives her a small smile. “I figured.”

Kurenai laughs, under her breath. “The hair?”

Kakashi nods. “Yeah. I mean, it looks good but it’s also… convenient?”

Kurenai nods, and then points at the scroll. “He wrote down the details of it there. You might… need to discuss your knowledge with the Yamanaka clan though.”

Kakashi nods, and then points at the other scrolls. “And those?”

Kurenai smirks softly, and then shrugs, watching Mirai run around the room for a moment. “Just some words for them, now that they’re grown and are in relationships. He was always so excited to reach this stage of their lives with them…” She sobers a bit, looking back at Kakashi. “He had premonitions, you know. Or… I don’t know. He feared, I guess. Fate and all that.” She shrugs. “He took precautions.”

 

Kakashi nods, swallowing down the pain that wants to rise. “And… you want me to give those scrolls to them… why?”

Kurenai hesitates, and then shrugs, before she grins at him, a bit wobbly. “I’d only cry a lot. It may sound stupid, but it’s true. So, I’d like you to do it.”

Kakashi exhales, and then snorts, humorlessly. “Okay.”

Kurenai nods, biting her lips for a moment. “Yeah, sorry.”

Kakashi shakes his head, forcing a little smile. “Don’t be.” He hesitates a long moment, and then fixes her with a direct gaze, giving her a slow eye-smile when she smiles warily. “How are you?”

The smile broadens, just the tiniest bit, and Kurenai nods, with a sidelong glance at Mirai. “I’m good, Kakashi. Truly.” She shrugs. “The pain is always there, but it is something that I can handle.” 

Kakashi nods, reflecting for a moment on his own handling of pain over the years. “And you… don’t…” He breaks off, not really knowing how to put it.

She prompts, eyebrows rising. “I don’t…?”

He shrugs, with a sigh. “You don’t have a desire for more anymore?”

Kurenai clicks her tongue, and then leans back, with a little chuckle. “Of course I do.” She rolls her eyes just a bit, and Kakashi ducks his head, sharing her chuckle. “I would love it if fate… would find someone else for me. And her.” She looks over at Mirai, who is jumping on the couch now, pretending it to be a trampoline.

Kurenai looks back. “But you know how it works. And she is the most important thing. End of story.”

Kakashi nods, grinning when Mirai waves at him.

 

 

They are. And I do.

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Ino.”

 

“Rokudaime!” Ino twirls, with a small smirk, to face him. “Such a pleasure of you coming by. Have you come to check on the status of the new defense grid?”

Kakashi gives her an eye-smile. “Yes… and no. Can we talk somewhere private?”

Ino blinks, and then extends her hand, towards a little room at the side of the control room, and Kakashi follows her there, waits until she has closed the door.

He exhales. “I have come to give you this.” He holds out the scroll for her to take, watches as something vulnerable passes over her face at the sight of the writing on the seal. “Kurenai has given it to me. He said you, Choji and Shikamaru should each get it when you’re… grown.” She looks up at him, and he smirks at her, for a moment, letting it transmit, before turning away slightly, to give her a moment to collect herself. 

He hesitates for a long moment. “There was a scroll for me as well.” He looks back at her, watching her left eye snap to his. “The hairstyle is quite helpful to hide it.”

Ino grimaces, and then shrugs, twirling the scroll in her hands. “It hasn’t been my intention…” She trails off.

Kakashi hums. “I am aware that hiding it is an… order from the elders of your clan.”

Ino looks away, and then shrugs, looking for all the world like a twelve-year-old again, making Kakashi grin. “It is fine.”

He waits until she looks back at him and then nods at her. “All I want is that when the time comes…”

Ino raises her chin. “Yes.”

Kakashi nods, voice serious.. “It might be taxing.”

Ino shrugs. “Using your sharingan is taxing as well?”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, with a little laugh. “Well, I don’t currently have it, so…”

Ino grins at him. “I heard something different?”

Kakashi clears his throat, while refusing to blush, dammit, and stepping past her towards the door. “Yeah, well, it’s complicated.”

She snickers.

 

Kakashi hesitates, with a hand on the door knob. “When the time comes, Ino, I bet it will be self-explanatory.”

Ino calls after him, loud enough for him to hear, and quiet enough no-one else does. “When the time comes, your eyes will be red, I bet, Rokudaime-sama.”

Kakashi hesitates, and turns to her, for a moment, before leaving, with a little mental shrug.

 

Yeah. That could very well be.

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He finds Naruto on training ground four, with Tenten.

 

Who is watching Naruto wield the Bashōsen with the expression of a kicked puppy, with matching pout.

Kakashi schools his features, tries not to let his amusement color his voice. “How’s it going?”

Tenten levels him with a look that carries all the suffering in the world. “The doctor said I’m too close to birth to wield it. So I… “ She gesticulates at Naruto, and then mumbles with a huge pout. “So I showed him how to do it.”

Kakashi coughs, trying to curb his rising amusement, while “he” is having lots of fun a short distance away, trying out the fan. “I see.”

Tenten taps her foot, arms crossed in front of her chest. “It’s just so unfair… I wielded it in the war? I could just…” She groans, head thrown back.

Kakashi nods, stuffing his hands into his pockets, while he works his jaw in order to keep the smile reigned in. “Yeah, it is… unfair.” And it is, but it’s also quite… funny?

He exhales, and then nods at Naruto. “So, how is he doing?”

Tenten grumbles a bit. “Fine.” She rolls her eyes. “Of course he’s fine, it’s a wind tool, and he’s Naruto.”

Kakashi nods, and then sobers slowly, watching her from the corner of his eyes. “And it bothers you.”

Tenten ducks her head.

She is quiet for a long moment. “I’m not jealous.” She looks up, shares a long look with Kakashi, before sighing. “I’m not, that’s not it.” She grimaces. “But my skills have always been weapons and summoning. I was so happy when I found something I could wield outside that range? And now…”

Kakashi nods, slowly. “You’re just deeply disappointed.”

Tenten sniffs. “Yeah.”

 

They are quiet for a moment, watching Naruto destroy a nearby grove with a full-arm swing.

Kakashi exhales. Guess I’ll have to order reforestation.

He lifts his eyebrows. “You know this fan is way too big to be used regularly and in… normal combat situations anyways?” Tenten frowns and he looks at her, and then nods at Naruto. “It would work so much better in the size of a kunai, don’t you think?”

Tenten blinks, and then turns her head, to stare at the fan. “I… guess?”

Kakashi waggles his eyebrows at her. “And you’d be the very best to create that weapon…”

Tenten stares at him, and then down at her stomach. “After birth.”

Kakashi snorts. “Yes, please.”

 

Tenten grins, and then freezes, for a split second, before grabbing his hand, her eyes unseeing. “Oh, oh, here.” She places his palm over the side of her stomach, and there is a bump against it suddenly, moving, and Kakashi doesn’t understand at first, doesn’t get it, but then Tenten grins at him, and it’s clear, right, and…

Kakashi sniffs, blinking rapidly to not let the tears drop, sharing a wobbly smile with Tenten, before grasping her hand. “Thank you.”

Tenten smirks at him. “How does it feel, Rokudaime? For you, I mean?”

Kakashi grimaces, and then shakes his head. “Surreal?”

Tenten snickers. “Yeah. For me, too.”

They share a small smile, and then turn to look at Naruto once more, when another grove is swept away. 

Tenten mumbles something under her breath that suspiciously sounds like ‘show off’.

 

Kakashi chuckles under his breath. “I think I’ll go save the rest of the trees. Will you be alright?”

Tenten rolls her eyes. “I’m pregnant, not disabled.”

Kakashi hums. “Right.” 

 

He winks at her, and then starts to walk towards Naruto, who grins at him, and then swings the fan one more time, whooping with the motion, obviously enjoying wielding it immensely.

He turns to grin at Kakashi when he’s 3 feet away, the smile huge, eyes sparkling.

A pang, through Kakashi’s guts, and the need to kiss Naruto, now.

And so he… pulls his mask down, and does.

 

A bruising kiss, this, hands pressed to Naruto’s face, pressing in, needing, and Naruto giggles, and lets him, and then they’re kissing messily, and…

A sense of displacement, and gold, and wind, and then they’re somewhere in the woods, and Naruto is breaking the kiss to gasp at him, eyes golden, and Kakashi dives right back in, starved suddenly, the phantom touch of that bump driving him mad.

Naruto mewls, and then breaks the kiss, mouthing along Kakashi’s jaw. “What is it.”

Kakashi grunts, pushing his hands under Naruto’s fishnet shirt. “The baby kicked me.”

Naruto snickers, and then lifts his hands, to let Kakashi push the shirt and fishnet off. “Yeah, they’re quite active by now.”

Kakashi hums, bending down to lick at a nipple, nipping it while speaking. “You have felt it, too?”

Naruto hisses, and then nods, a bit wildly. “Earlier, yes. Before I tried the fan.”

Kakashi frowns, and then looks to the side. “The fan… where is it?”

Naruto rolls his eyes. “Clone, bringing it home.” A finger finds Kakashi’s jaw. “Don’t deflect?”

Kakashi grunts. “Did not.” He bends down, to worry a nipple, sucking, licking, biting it until Naruto is moaning, and rock hard. 

He gasps against the wet skin. “I bet I could make you come like this.”

Naruto shivers, eyes dark gold, and bothered. “Probably.” He swallows thickly. “But you could also press my head into the grass and fuck me raw, how about that?”

Fuck. Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut, grimacing. His cock pulses.

Naruto chuckles darkly, and then unzips his pants, stripping out of them carefully.

Kakashi licks his lips. “Naruto… I…” He trails off, not knowing what to say.

I don’t want this - would be definitely a lie.

I don’t want to hurt you - closer, but then they both know that Naruto likes to ride the edge of pain.

I….

No. There really is nothing. 

Because he wants, he desires.

 

More. Everything.

 

Naruto seems to read his mind, because he grins suddenly, nose scrunching, and then steps past him, sinking down to the ground in one fluid motion, lowering his forehead to the ground.

He spreads his legs, cock dangling down, fat and heavy.

Kakashi stares at him, somewhat dumbly.

 

Naruto turns his head back, just a bit, to catch his eye. “Should I conjure a clone to fuck me open?”

Kakashi jerks, and then sinks to his knees as well, something in him shifting, light-headed with want now.

He gives the pert buttocks a slap, watches in satisfaction as Naruto clenches. “No.”

He undoes his own fly, pushes it down just far enough to free himself. He gives himself a pump, and then leans forward, putting one hand between Naruto’s shoulder blades, before shuffling forward, to position himself directly over Naruto. 

 

Time seems to slow, still.

 

It’s tough going, to press in. There’s hardly any precome yet, and it’s hot, and tight, and dry, and Kakashi can feel Naruto tremble under his hand, and all around. Silently.

He doesn’t stop.

Heat, crushing heat, threatening his sanity.

 

A moment, suspended, when he is sheathed.

Sweat, pearling off Naruto’s skin.

 

And then Kakashi starts to fuck, hard, down, always down, precisely, knowing he hits with every push. Knowing it is blissed-out torture.

 

Naruto’s teeth are fangs, caging grunted moans.

Asking for more.

 

It doesn’t take long.

It’s too rough, too hot, too much friction.

Too much vicious lust.

 

Naruto screams, when he comes, a long, almost wailing cry, and he convulses, almost throwing Kakashi off, who doggedly fucks him through it, determined to make this shattering.

Naruto’s limbs give out, and Kakashi falls on top of him, gritting his teeth, still fucking, still claiming, still… 

 

An orgasm, like a brick to the head. 

Painful, this one, the pleasure so intense it is beyond feeling.

Naruto sobs underneath him, reaching for his hand.

 

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, pushes his nose in sweaty gold.

 

 

 

A vague sound, a whisper of metal.

And a voice, hard. “Get off of him, you bastard.”

 

Kakashi blinks his eyes open, trying not to move too fast against the blade at his throat.

He licks his lips, and tries to look up at the shadowed ninja holding the sword, but the sun is behind him, and all he can see is a shadow. “I…”

The man interrupts, voice a hiss now. “I said get off.”

A flash of gold, and then the sword is gone, and the man, too, held against a tree by Naruto’s chakra hand.

Kakashi clears his throat, and then carefully pulls out, making them both hiss.

He grimaces, knowing that under normal circumstances they would cuddle now, and clean up, and bask in the afterglow, but now… 

He just uses his undershirt to wipe them both clean, perfunctory, watching as Naruto sits up after, glowering silently and totally unashamedly at the man in his remote grip.

Kakashi pulls his uniform sans shirt back on, and then then steps over, foregoing pulling his mask on. “And you are?”

The man struggles ineffectively, eyes a bit wild. “Not a pig like you.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a moment, reaching for patience he can feel Naruto not having. “What makes you say I’m a pig?”

The man hisses. “Raping that lad. And obviously having him in some kind of thrall, for him to defend you. You p…”

Another chakra hand closes over his mouth, cutting off the word.

Kakashi pinches the bridge of his nose.

And then turns to Naruto, trying for humor. “Not our best idea I guess.”

Naruto glowers at him, still fanged. “None of his business in my opinion.” He pushes up, striding butt naked over to the man still in his chakra hands. “I have you know, that this is my husband.” He tilts his head towards Kakashi, and Kakashi’s heart skips a beat, as always.

Naruto continues, voice a bit calmer. “We like it kinky. We like rough sex. I literally goaded him into this.” He snorts, shooting a look at Kakashi, with a wink. “Not that you needed a lot of goading…”

Kakashi snorts, but wisely keeps his mouth shut, pulling his mask up instead.

The man blinks, watching him, sudden recognition in his voice. “You are Hatake Kakashi. I almost didn’t recognize you, you look so… young.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Yes.” He exhales, through his nose, and then nods at Naruto. “This is my husband, Uzumaki Naruto. And you are?”

The man frowns, and then seems to deflate a bit. “I am… Jugo. I came to…”

Naruto blinks and then withdraws his chakra hands, letting Jugo down on the ground. 

He grins suddenly. “You were in Sasuke’s Taka group.”

Jugo looks at him, and then nods, once. “I am looking for Sasuke. And Karin. I…” He trails off, with a shrug.

 

Kakashi exchanges a look with Naruto, before stepping up between them. “I see. Well, you have come to the right place.” He hesitates, and then clicks his tongue, humor in his voice. “We’ll bring you to them. However, might I ask… not to share our little…” He grimaces, searching for the right word. “…session with anyone?” He shrugs. “We’re sometimes just…”

Naruto interjects, while pulling his clothes back on. “As I said, we’re kinky. I waited much too long for any hang-ups in regards to the fun we can have. So we fuck a lot, and everywhere.”

Kakashi nods, feeling the tips of his ears burn. Dammit, Naruto. “Yeah. That.”

He can see Naruto shoot him a sharp smile from the corner of his eyes. And a wink.

Naruto steps up, places his hand on his shoulder for a split second. “That was spectacular, dear.” He leans in, to press a kiss on the skin behind Kakashi’s left ear. His voice is a loud whisper, obviously meant to be heard by Jugo. “And Kurama already… cleaned up, so to speak, too, so we can do an encore later?”

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut for a moment, shaking his head once. 

And then he shares a deadpan look with Jugo. “See? What could I possibly do against him?”

 

Jugo blinks, and then snorts. 

He nods, once, and then stares at Naruto for a long moment, eye faraway. “You were always on his mind.”

Naruto smirks proudly, and then shrugs, with a wide smile. “I know.” He quirks an eyebrow. “And we still are on each other’s minds, we’re just…” He weighs his head. “… Occupied, at times.”

He sticks his tongue out between his teeth for a split second, and then shrugs again, turning towards the village in the distance. Calling back over his shoulder. “Coming?”

 

And Kakashi, so help him god, only replies: “Not right now, no?”

Jugo stares at him, and Kakashi shrugs, and then extends his hand, and they follow Naruto, slowly.

 

Naruto, who puts a lot of hip into his walk.

And who grins at Kakashi, when he turns to look at him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

They find Sasuke at the Hyuuga complex, and it warms Kakashi’s heart to see him there, with Hanabi, and Karin, and Neji, playing a board game, laughing, and getting up to hug Jugo impulsively, but it is even more heartwarming to see Jugo stare at them, totally flabbergasted, and Naruto snickers, and then drags Kakashi away by his hand, all the way back to their home, for the promised encore. 

 

 

All things considered, Kakashi figures Naruto probably knows best, so he just shrugs, and gets with the program.

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

“I’ve been thinking.”

 

Kakashi blinks up, a bit dead-pan. “Uh oh.”

Obito narrows his eyes. “You and I should practice. After I get back I mean.”

Kakashi sighs, and then leans back, rubbing his temple. “We’ve been over this.”

Obito rolls his eyes. “Yes yes yes. You don’t want to push it, because the eye is based on tragedy, and it drains you, and if you have two, blah, blah, blah.”

Kakashi glowers at him, silently.

Obito sighs, a bit exasperatedly. “But your eye is mine, or at least closest to mine, and as such, I think that I may be the best person to help you train it. No shade to Sora here, but…”

Kakashi rolls his shoulders, while glowering at Obito. “I know.”

Obito waggles his eyebrows. “And we cannot always make a new Icha Icha movie for you to get the hang of it.”

Kakashi looks away and clears his throat, and then flips Obito the bird, silently.

Obito snickers.

 

He sobers slowly, and then leans forward on the desk, on both hands. “I suggested Naruto blow you while you try to concentrate.”

Kakashi freezes, and then leans back, spreading his arms to indicate the office. “Obito. Seriously?”

Obito rolls his eyes. “Oh please, I know you’ve had sex in here, stop pretending.”

Kakashi shakes his head once, pinching the bridge of his nose. Repeating. “Sora said I would know when.” He sighs. “And, as stupid as that may be, I trust her.”

Obito weighs his head. “And I promised to help you and Naruto, so here I am.”

Kakashi sighs, lowering his hand. He taps his finger on the desk. “Let’s just… train, Obito. And if I should activate it during training… then that’s just fine, isn’t it.”

Obito narrows his eyes. “And I keep it active during training?”

Kakashi blinks, and then leans forward, just a bit. “Do that. And try to take me down.”

A slow grin spreads over Obito’s face. “Tomorrow, training ground two?”

Kakashi tilts his head, rolling his eyes. “It’s a date.”

Obito snorts. “Oh god no, we’d both be dead.”

 

They share a grin, and Obito reaches out, to ruffle Kakashi’s hair, ignoring Kakashi’s indignant look, and the hand coming up to swat his hand away.

And then he leaves, with a little wave, and Kakashi curses after him, and then cackles when the door closes, while shaking his head.

 

Ass.

 

 

And it’s a good feeling.

So good.

 

 

 

Notes:

Also: Just got the last art I had commissioned, so chapter 67 and 70 will come with the art I had in my head for soooooooo long.
And likely 68 will have one as well.

*happy dance*

(That art for 67 is also part of the reason for the break, I knew I would need to adapt to it (and wanted to do that), because.... yes. You'll see^^. I'm VERY happy with what the artist created for me there. <3)

 

*waves*

Chapter 65: Difficult decisions

Notes:

Back for the last leg of the journey! Almost finished now 😭😭😭 just some editing to be done.

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

Sai watches him, expression neutral, as is his voice. “And as such, it would be wise to take the technology we need by acquiring the whole business. The Yamanaka clan has expressed its wish to proceed with the implementation.”

Kakashi grimaces, looking away for a moment. “We know that the clan wishes to keep the business though. It would be extremely unorthodox and disrespectful to go over their heads and acquire the deeds through the bank.”

Sai shrugs, just a bit. “Still. The barrier takes precedence.”

Kakashi pinches the bridge of his nose. “It does.” He looks up, with a sigh. “And there really is no other way we can go…?”

Sai lowers his head, just a bit, his tone softening. “Ino says it would throw us back several years if we do not integrate the relays.”

Kakashi grunts, his mind running a circle of fuck, fuck, fuck.

He shakes his head once, shooting a look up at the photos of the other Hokages, thoughts glum. This is a shit decision. The clans will hate the interference, and I can just hear the council already.

He groans. “Fine. Buy it all up. Let’s get this barrier up and running, and I’ll… deal with the fallout.”

Sai nods, and then turns, the door closing with a soft click behind him.

 

Kurenai exhales softly, leaning forward on her elbows. “Think this is wise?”

Kakashi shakes his head, and then sighs. “No. But… necessary?”

Kurenai grimaces. “A shit decision.”

Kakashi snorts. “Yes.” He frowns. “You know, I always thought there must have been other ways to decide some of… you know. But now that I am here, in this damned chair…”

Kurenai tilts her head, her red eyes watching him intensely. “You cannot compare that to a forced acquisition.”

Kakashi nods, and then locks his gaze with hers, with a shrug. “No, not really. And yet…”

Kurenai exhales, and then nods. “You find yourself making compromises, because you have to. You know they’re shitty decisions, but you have to make them. You have to stay strong.” She smirks. “You will continue to make these decisions, too, Kakashi.” She points a finger. “Good practice for being a parent, too. Because I bet you will have to make compromises in regards to the time you will be able to spend with your children.”

 

Kakashi grimaces. 

 

He looks away. “Yeah, I… have thought about that.”

Kurenai lifts an eyebrow. “Have you discussed it with Naruto?”

Kakashi looks back at her. “The way how we should split up our time?” Kurenai nods.  

Kakashi shrugs. “No, not yet. We’re… too stuck up in preparations, I guess.”

Kurenai presses her lips together. “You think they’ll be here soon.”

Kakashi swallows, looking out the window. “It’s a gut feeling.”

Kurenai narrows her eyes. “One that the Yondaime shares.”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. “That obvious?”

Kurenai cackles, and Kakashi looks back at her with a quirked eyebrow. 

She grins. “I go to tea with Kushina regularly.”

Kakashi snorts. “Ah.” He sighs, and then shrugs again. “As I said, it’s a gut feeling, but…”

Kurenai finishes the sentence. “…it informs a lot of your decisions.”

Kakashi bites his lips. “Difficult decisions.”

 

Kurenai gets up, stepping towards the door, but hesitating, looking back at him. “I’ll clear it with the council. You should have Itachi clear it with the clans.”

Kakashi sighs, looking up at her. “Alright, thank you. Why Itachi though?”

Kurenai weighs her head. “His father was an old friend with the clan about to be… gutted. It will soften the blow if he will lay it out for them.” She grimaces. “I’ll talk to him.” She waves her hand. “You should work through that stack of paperwork and then get to training with Obito.”

 

Kakashi snorts, with a shake of his head. Emphasizing heavily. “Yes, Ma’am.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Orochimaru has asked to… talk to you.”

 

Sora stares at him, her hazel eyes incredulous. “And you… granted that request???”

Kakashi shifts a bit in his seat, trying not to flinch. “Yes.”

The muscles in Sora’s jaw jump. “I beg your pardon.”

Kakashi clears his throat. “We need to…”

Sora interjects, heatedly. “I don’t need to do shit.” She steps up to his desk, staring down at him. “Do you want me to leave again? Make me go back to my little house? Leave Kushina, and Minato, and Jiraiya, and Tsunade? Leave you all?” Her gaze breaks, just a bit, as does her voice. “Why?”

Kakashi closes his eyes for a long moment. “He… has found a way to…” He hesitates, reopening his eyes, watching her, watching the tears in her eyes. “To have a child. But he wants to clear it with you.”

Sora’s voice is hoarse. “Why me.”

Kakashi shakes his head once. “You know why.”

Sora snorts, while a tear runs down her face. “Ahhhh, the past is never really dead, is it.”

Kakashi lifts his eyebrows, trying to quip. “Lots of previously dead people running around…”

Sora’s nostrils flare. “Not funny.”

Kakashi nods. “No.” He sighs. “Do you want me to come with.”

Sora hisses at him. “Definitely not.” She steps back, and turns to the door, only to stop in the middle of the room, staring at the pictures. 

Kakashi follows her gaze, his voice a whisper. “I hate these decisions.”

Sora swallows, audibly, and then turns her head back, to look over her shoulder at him. 

Her voice is very quiet. “Does Minato concur?”

Kakashi nods, once. “Yes.” He gives her a painful smile. “He hates it, too.”

Sora turns back, her hand twitching. 

 

Her shoulders lower. “Fine. We’ll do it here though. I’m not going into that… facility.”

Kakashi nods. “That’s just fair.” He clears his throat. “I’ll let you know.”

Sora nods, and then steps forward, reaching for the door. 

She sounds tired. “You’re real lucky I like and understand you, Hatake Kakashi.”

 

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, for a long moment. 

 

I know.

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

“Send Ibiki-san in, will you?”

 

Shikamaru quirks an eyebrow, watching him with heavy-lidded eyes. “Planning on sending him onto another treasure hunt?”

Kakashi weighs his head a bit. “Maybe?”

Shikamaru snorts. “You know, one of these days he’ll catch on.”

Kakashi snorts, too. “Oh, I bet he has already. In fact, I would be deeply disappointed if he hadn’t.” 

Shikamaru narrows his eyes. “So… why do you do this then? Annoy him like that?”

Kakashi looks up from the report he was reading. “Annoy? Why do you think this annoys him?”

Shikamaru frowns. “Well… I would be annoyed to be sent on all these… funny missions.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Ibiki-san has… been a tool for decades as well, and one I’ve seen in action. A mind like this is very sharp, and it can cut. Trust me, keeping him occupied like this is in all our best interest.”

Shikamaru hums. “You think he would be a problem if we don’t keep him occupied?”

Kakashi grimaces, just a bit. “Problem is too strong a word. I think he would be bored and would look for means to lift this boredom. And that would be a problem.”

Shikamaru nods thoughtfully. “And so you send him around the village, and Land of Fire, and in the neighboring states on these silly errants.” He tilts his head. “What makes you think he doesn’t use those visits for his own amusement?”

Kakashi leans back, looking up at Shikamaru with a slight smile. “I don’t.” He points a finger at the door. “In fact I expect him to follow his instincts, more or less off the leash. It will keep him occupied, and has the side effect that he will get the honors should he come across anything… interesting.”

Shikamaru stares at him for a long moment, and then groans, with a shake of his head. “You’re as bad as my father.”

Kakashi snorts, watching him for a moment. “How is Shikaku? We don’t see each other much?”

Shikamaru sighs, with a shrug. “Crazy excited for future grandchildren. Extremely busy with Inoichi and the barrier. Regularly annoying and dragging us off to dinner. Still getting yelled at by my mother.”

Kakashi laughs soundlessly, and then hums. “Living and well, then.”

 

Shikamaru snorts, turning towards the door. “Living and well, yes.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

It’s late, and Kakashi has just turned to the delightful activity of nibbling along the column of Naruto’s throat when the knock comes, loud and insistent.

 

Naruto groans, utterly annoyed, letting his head fall back. “Oh come on. An Anbu yesterday, and the day before Sasuke, unannounced. We haven’t had sex for three days?! What now…”

Kakashi chuckles, leaning in to press a quick kiss to his lips, before getting up to open the door, pulling up his mask. “I mean you could tell me before I open…?”

Naruto pulls a face. “Not in the mood for other minds. I just want you.”

Kakashi twirls on the spot. “Keep that thought.” He catches a quick, half-annoyed, half-amused grin and turns to the front door, opening it with a flourish. “What can I…”

He trails off, staring at the figure before him, with Genma and Tenzou behind him, Genma looking at him somewhat sheepishly, while Tenzou is glowering silently.

 

Orochimaru inclines his head, just a  fraction. “Greetings, Kakashi. I hope I’m not interrupting.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue, shooting a look back at Naruto, who is laying on the floor, propped up on his elbows, watching silently. “Ah no, not… really.” An indignant sound from Naruto and Kakashi clears his throat, lifting his eyebrows. “So. What can I help you with?”

Orochimaru tilts his head, the long black hair shifting, and then he walks in, past Kakashi, in one fluid motion. 

Kakashi blinks, and then turns, to follow him, tone dripping with sarcasm. “Please do come in. I’m sure this cannot wait till tomorrow.”

 

He hears Genma close the door behind them, Tenzou a dark shadow just behind Orochimaru.

Naruto makes no move to get up. “What is it.”

 

Orochimaru glides over to the other side of the room, running the tips of his fingers over the shelves with books and trinkets, and photos. “I have talked to Sora.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, shares a quick look with Genma, who nods. “And?”

Orochimaru licks his lips, the weird tongue snaking out for just a second. “We came to an agreement.” He turns around, with an unsettling smile on his lips. “I will be allowed to have a child, and she will oversee it.”

Beside him, Tenzou shifts to his other foot.

Kakashi exhales softly. “Oversee?”

Orochimaru rolls his eyes. “She will make sure there will be no clones… just this one child.”

Tenzou speaks up, tone hard. “Just one, hmm.”

Orochimaru looks at him, tone almost gentle. “Sometimes, one is enough.”

 

Kakashi bites his lips, and then steps forward, in between Tenzou and Orochimaru. “I see. And you came to tell me this tonight, why…?”

Orochimaru shrugs. “I was curious.”

Kakashi tilts his head, echoing. “Curious.”

Orochimaru nods, and then kneels down, to look at Naruto. “Does he still have it?” 

Naruto frowns. “What do you mean?”

Orochimaru tilts his head, the slitted eyes sparkling. “Kakashi took a scale from me, years ago. Jiraiya picked it out of his hair… I was watching then, you see. I always used to watch Jiraiya… and Tsunade… well, before she went and disguised herself. But Jiraiya always, as long as I could. And he told Kakashi to give it to you.”

Naruto blinks, and then looks up at Kakashi for a moment, before shrugging, tone deliberately uninterested. “And, if so?”

Orochimaru smiles at Naruto. “Would there be any way to get it back?”

Kakashi blinks. “Why.”

Orochimaru blinks up to him. “No reason. Just loathe to have something of mine laying around.”

 

Genma snorts, the toothpick shifting to the other corner of his mouth, but he stays silent. 

Kakashi sighs, deeply, “And you want us to believe that.”

The expression on Orochimaru’s face darkens, his eyes hard now. “I need it.”

Kakashi drawls. “Why…”

Orochimaru huffs, and then pushes up again, staring down at Naruto with disdain. “She made me promise that I would only use the most… basic version of myself for this child. And the only cells that fit that description are possibly…” He trails off.

Kakashi blinks, and then groans, letting his head fall back. “You think there’s some cells in that scale yet that you could use?”

Orochimaru shrugs, elegantly, his tone acerbic. “I promised I’d ask.”

Kakashi smirks at him. “And you keep your promise, of course.”

Orochimaru doesn’t dignify that with an answer. 

 

Kakashi sighs, spreading his hands. “I’m sorry. It’s not in my possession anymore. As you yourself have said I have given it to Naruto.” 

Orochimaru quirks an eyebrow, gaze falling back to Naruto with a thoughtful tone. “And will your soulmate grant my request?”

Naruto’s face carries a stubborn pout. “It’s in my brush.” He looks up, the blue eyes finding Kakashi’s. “That brush.” He licks his lips, while sitting up, fidgeting slightly. “I don’t want to destroy it?”

Orochimaru’s tongue slithers out for a moment, before he grins. “I could replicate the scale for you, afterwards.”

Naruto sniffs, looking away. “Not the same.”

Kakashi lowers his gaze, quirking an eyebrow. “A difficult decision.”

Naruto snorts, and then hisses. “Ah, yes, don’t we love those.”

 

Genma speaks up, quietly. “Good practice.” He and Kakashi share a long look, and Kakashi presses his lips together, while Genma steps forward, just slightly. “Being Hokage is no child’s play, Naruto. But then you know that by now.” He looks back at Kakashi, and then shrugs. “As your advisor, I advise you to help Orochimaru. It will keep fractions at a minimum.”

Kakashi exhales, and then nods, once. “I agree.”

Naruto’s voice is a hiss. “It’s my brush.”

Kakashi raises his gaze, locks it to stormy blue. “Yes.”

 

Naruto glowers at him a moment longer, and then springs up, storming into their bathroom, retrieving it with a flourish. “Here, then, since you need it so much. Keep it and don’t bother to bring it back, its use has been fulfilled.” He turns on his heel and walks towards the bedroom, head high. 

 

Genma’s toothpick shifts to the other corner of his mouth again, with a little smile. “Guess you’ll have your work cut out tonight.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Ha ha.” He sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. 

He points a the brush. “Will this do, then?”

Orochimaru’s long, elegant fingers turn it, trace the scale in the head. “Possibly. I will need to take it out.”

Kakashi nods, and then goes over a dozen or more replies, all more or less … bitchy, before settling on a vague. “Good luck.”

Orochimaru saunters over to him, and Kakashi holds his ground, trying not to be annoyed. “I am sorry I interrupted your…” The tongue slithers out, while Orochimaru’s eyes flit to the closed bedroom door. “… More pleasant activities.”

Kakashi pastes a smile on, knowing the fake-ness of it will transmit through the mask. “Sure.”

 

He steps back, and Tenzou clears his throat after a moment, pointedly, gesturing towards the door.

Orochimaru sighs, terribly. “Ah, I’ve really enjoyed our little excursion… I hope in time I will be able to move around freely again?”

Kakashi grunts, noncommittally. “In time, maybe.”

Orochimaru sighs again, and then grins, this weird broad grin, that is quite unsettling. “Well, since I am more or less immortal… I can wait.” He winks at Kakashi. “You got a boost, too, and your soulmate…” He waggles his eyebrows.

Kakashi works his jaw for a moment. “You better don’t think you could get your hands on his cells.”

Orochimaru puts a hand onto his chest. “Me? Never.”

Kakashi presses his lips together, and then nods, once, nodding at the door. “Good night.”

 

He nods at Genma, and then watches as the trio leaves, the door falling into the lock with a small click. 

 

 

Stillness, in their apartment. 

 

Kakashi grimaces.

 

 

 

When he enters the bedroom Naruto is sprawled across their bed on his stomach, face burrowed into his folded arms.

Kakashi sits down next to him, places his palm into the small of his back, thumb rubbing softly. “Want to scream at me?”

Naruto’s voice sounds tired. “No.” A pause. “I knew he was there.”

Kakashi hums, but waits, knowing there’s more.

Naruto turns his head towards him, but doesn’t look up at him. “Of course I’d checked when you went to the door… and… I don’t know. Some part of me knew.”

Kakashi shrugs. “We know you can read minds if you put your own mind to it… maybe you caught his intent.”

Naruto grumbles, while his fingers pick at the blanket. “Maybe.”

Kakashi nods to himself. “And you are pissed at yourself that you want him to be able to have the scale and therefore this chance.”

Naruto groans. “God, why are you so good at reading me.”

Kakashi chuckles, and then drawls, heavily emphasizing. “Because I’m good with everything about you?”

 

Naruto snickers, sending him a playful look. “Oh yeah?”

Kakashi waggles his eyebrows. “Oh yes.” He lets his eyes travel, feeling Naruto watch him. “In fact, if you want to stay like this…?”

Naruto swallows. “Just like this?”

Kakashi makes a show out of thinking. “Well, I probably would need to undress you. And then massage you a bit, what do you think…”

Naruto licks his lips. “I’d like that. And then…”

Kakashi smiles sharply. “Why don’t I get everything, and you undress and get comfortable.”

 

He gets up and turns to the bathroom, to get some towels, grabbing the massage oil that can be used as lube in the process, hearing the sound of hasty undressing from the bedroom.

He looks back, laughing out loud when he sees Naruto lie there, stark naked, already, blinking innocently. 

He grins. “Put a bit of speed into that?”

Naruto weighs his head, expression decidedly innocent. “Maybe?”

Kakashi chuckles, and then climbs on top of him, settling on the back of Naruto’s thighs.

 

Naruto undulates softly, and then stretches his arms out in front of him, with a sigh. “Good, yes. Service me and then use me.”

Kakashi snorts. “Service you and then use you?”

Naruto giggles. “Yeah well, you know. Massage me, and then knead me, and then…” He licks his lips, voice rougher. “Open me with your fingers, and maybe your tongue, get me real wet and open… and then give it to me so slowly I’ll scream.”

Kakashi swallows, cursing his almost instant erection. “Sounds like me as if you’re using me.”

Naruto smiles, beatifically. “Maybe?”

 

Kakashi hums, and then nods, pressing a dollop of massage cream onto his hands.

He rubs his hands to warm them, and then leans forward, starting to massage the shoulders and upper arms, slowly, thoroughly. 

Feeling the muscles grow soft and pliant, hearing the soft moans.

The soft hitch in Naruto’s voice when he finds a ticklish spot, close to the armpit.

The deep, deep groan when Kakashi finds the spot that hurts so, so good.

 

He runs his thumbs down either side of the vertebrae, pressing softly, and then pushing down all the way into the dips on the back of the hips, with his fingers splayed out on the firm ass.

Naruto pushes his hips up, just a bit, and Kakashi gives him a gentle slap, to which Naruto only giggles.

Kakashi hums and then starts to massage in earnest, really working the broad back and shoulders, to the grunts and moans that sound like a melody.

 

Time seems to slow, is unimportant. 

 

When Kakashi finally puts his lube covered fingers to Naruto’s hole there is barely resistance, and he gives it the same thorough treatment he gave the back, massaging it, pressing, spreading, rubbing, until he can see the sweat pool in the small of Naruto’s back, and those beautiful, gleaming muscles bunched again, in an effort to not come, and he smiles sharply, bringing his fingers down to push, there, there I know it’s there, right there where you love it so much, how you prefer it, and Naruto cries out, almost pitifully, jerking under him, helplessly. 

Kakashi waits a moment, and then withdraws his fingers, to free himself, putting his cock to the hole, and then shifting forward, gliding in, the immediate pleasure making him see stars, while Naruto moans in this high-pitched voice that makes Kakashi’s toes curl.

He sheathes himself, completely, knowing he must feel huge, and probably feels like too much, now, in the oversensitive, despite the preparation, but he also knows Naruto loves this, loves to feel every inch, every millimeter, every twitch.

 

Kakashi closes his eyes, lets his head fall back while his hand find the support of Naruto’s back and… 

moves.

 

 

Slow, rolling pushes, contemplative and meditative. 

No pressure, just… encasing. Just gliding.

Heat, and simmering delight.

 

And Naruto babbling in abject pleasure.

 

His orgasm creeps up on him, slowly, gently, like a shiver of air, too static to really notice, but unrelenting, and there, suddenly, and Naruto sobs, and Kakashi falls forward, with a cry, pushes his nose into gold, and… inhales.

 

A breath, a breath, of life.

 

Kakashi’s hand goes around Naruto’s shoulder, to lay gently over his throat.

Holding, only.

 

It’s enough.

 

Naruto roars, rearing up, a full-body twitching running through him, the vibrations against Kakashi’s hand a tickle, and a tease.

And sincere gratification.

 

Kakashi slips out, when Naruto falls down again.

 

 

 

Silence now, besides harsh breathing.

 

And Naruto, cackling, after a moment. “You do remember that this massage oil does not wash out properly, right?”

Kakashi sighs, his eyelids heavy, his clothes sticky between them. “I know.”

Naruto snorts, pulling his hand up to press a kiss to Kakashi’s palm. “Wanna burn them together?”

Kakashi hums, pressing a kiss to his neck. “Later.”

Naruto sighs happily, and then pushes his face into Kakashi’s hand and nestles in, and their breathing syncs, and darkness comes, for a while.

 

Well, is Kakashi’s thought before he falls asleep, at least we’re already in bed this time.

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

“You know, Iru-kun, there is no-one better to lead the academy than you.”

 

Iruka squirms, pinching the bridge of his nose. “You think? What if people think you’re only appointing me because of our…” He trails off, gesticulating a bit.

Obito rolls his eyes. “If they haven’t thought that till now they won’t start, will they. And if they do…” He shrugs.

Kakashi shrugs, too, quipping. “At least I am really good for your career?”

Iruka glowers at him, while Obito tries to hide his amusement. “Ha ha.” He sighs. “Come on Kakashi, you could at least try to be serious about this.”

Kakashi leans back, steepling his fingers. “But I am?” He raises his eyebrows. “There is no-one else better equipped both in connections, common sense, character or knowledge, than you.” He points one finger. “You have all the necessary qualifications. You are friends with the other teachers. You are the living proof that we can live and learn.”

Obito whips his foot, grinning broadly, this short of preening. “Glad to be of service!”

Iruka sends him a long-suffering look.

Kakashi cackles soundlessly.

 

Obito leans in, cooing. “Oh, come on, Iru-kun, what can possibly happen. Those who love you will support you, Kakashi is Hokage, Naruto will be next, and you love the prospect of shaping the academy.” He leans in further, reaching up to feather a fingertip across the scar on Iruka’s face, his voice a whisper. “You know you do.”

Iruka lets out a long sigh. 

And then addresses Kakashi, drily. “See what I have to put up with?”

 

Kakashi narrows his eyes, and then lifts his chin, just a bit. “So. Anything you want to tell me?”

Iruka swallows. “Tell?”

Kakashi purses his lips. “Oh you know, there’s been rumors…”

Iruka colors a bit, while Obito grins at him. “Rumors.”

Kakashi hums. “Yeah, about this spot, with that pretty waterfall, and people using it for romantic gestures, you know….”

Iruka swallows, reaching out to thread his fingers with Obito’s. “Well, I thought we might go for dinner, since this is hardly the place for private bus…”

He breaks off when Obito snorts, loudly, and then cackles, when he looks at him.

Obito waves his free hand into Kakashi’s vague direction. “Not the right place for private business? Honey, he and Naruto have fucked everywhere here?”

Kakashi clears his throat, sounding vaguely defensive. “Not everywhere…?”

Obito shoots him a look.

Kakashi opens his mouth, and then closes it again. “Anyways…”

Obito cackles.

 

Iruka shakes his head. “So okay, fine. You’re both insufferable.” He inhales deeply, and then looks at Kakashi for a long moment, before turning to Obito. “And I am so happy to have you both in my life… as the ones I love. An old love”, he nods, and smiles at Obito, who watches him with a vulnerable expression on his face, “and a new.” He smirks, nose scrunching, “Not so new anymore, but…” He looks back at Kakashi, while his eyes fill with tears. “But one that’s to stay.”

Kakashi smirks at him, knowing the smile shows as wobbly as he feels, mask or not. “Yeah.” He sniffs. “When’s the date?”

Obito sniffs, too, and leans his forehead against Iruka’s temple. “No exact date yet. But… In summer. I want summer and sun.”

 

Kakashi hums, watching Iruka turn to Obito and find his lips, and he gets up silently, and slips out, cackling to himself, knowing, just knowing that there will be another christening of surfaces coming up. 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 66: Beautiful beyond compare

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

“Ready to usher in a new year?”

 

Kakashi hums, turning to look at Minato, who steps up to him, silently.

He shrugs. “Yes?”

Minato smirks gently. “It’s going to be a big one.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Big changes you mean.”

Minato nods, with a hum. “Mhh hmm.” He waggles his eyebrows. “We cannot wait.”

Kakashi snorts, and then shoots a look back towards Kushina and Kaguya, who are conversing quietly on the other side of the room, where they opened the doors to the porch, despite the temperature. 

He nods at the pair. “I never thanked you for taking her under your wings.”

Minato waves a hand, while taking a sip of his champagne. “Ah, no worries. She is delightful. And very, very interesting.” He sighs a bit. “And very, very hard to crack.”

Kakashi smiles a bit wistfully. “Yeah, I had hoped to glean more of her knowledge.”

Minato weighs his head. “I think she thinks that if she interferes more then it’ll change away from the desired outcome.”

Kakashi grunts, taking a sip of his own drink. “Free will and all that?”

Minato shrugs. “Probably.”

Kakashi nods, and then shrugs. “Too bad.”

Minato snorts.

 

There is a small pause, where they both take in the assembled guests, their friends and family, with Naruto talking animatedly to Obito and Iruka over to the side, with Jiraiya and Tsunade watching.

Minato’s voice is wistful. “So precious, this moment in time.”

Kakashi blinks, turning to look at him, hearing something in Minato’s tone. “What… is it?”

Minato shakes his head once. “Nothing definite.” Kakashi glowers at him and Minato holds up his hand, with a sigh. “No really, nothing… definite.” He presses his lips together. “Just… a feeling.”

Kakashi’s tone is clipped. “A feeling.”

Minato winces, his expression apologetic. “I’m sorry. But you know, I always followed my gut feelings?”

Kakashi grunts. “Yeah, that still has me in a woozy?”

Minato laughs, under his breath. “Yeah, well, what can I say…” 

Kakashi runs his tongue along his teeth, before deciding to force the issue. “Tell me.”

Minato closes his eyes for a moment. “Do you think that wise, Kaka-kun?”

Kakashi smiles painfully. “I do not… but the Hokage does.”

Minato winces, and then shrugs, with a nod. “Good point.” He shakes his head once. “It’s just… I just feel like this… ushers in a really big one.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, somewhat annoyed. “A really big one. Like one where you have to try to tie up all the loose ends?”

Minato smirks. “Maybe.”

Kakashi takes a sip of his drink, to drown out the jab of pain in his guts. “Great.”

Minato reaches up, to squeeze his shoulder. “This is already the best second chance ever, Kakashi. Don’t mourn it.” He squeezes again. “I don’t.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, staring into his glass.

 

A tug, at his soul, and warmth, spreading.

 

Naruto interrupts his thoughts, eyes sparkling and seeing too much. “What are you two back here whispering about?”

Kakashi grunts, lifting his arm so Naruto can slip into an embrace. “Nothing. Just talking.” He puts on a deliberately insulted expression. “And we don’t whisper.”

Minato smirks, leaning in a bit to grin at Naruto. “We converse.”

Naruto nods at him. “Uh huh.” He points a finger. “You two are full of shit.”

Minato laughs, and then reaches out to push a strand of hair out of Naruto’s forehead.

He smiles, very softly. “You look happy. I’m so glad.”

Naruto nods, his hand around Kakashi’s waist squeezing for a long moment. “I am, Dad.” He looks at Kakashi, and his smile makes the warmth in Kakashi’s core spread, taking his breath. “I am.”

Kakashi smiles back at him, wobbly. 

He reaches into the pocket of his pants, withdrawing the small pebble in it.

Holding it out for Naruto to take. “I thought of putting it into another brush head, but it didn’t feel right.” He rolls the sparkly little stone in his hand. “Maybe… maybe we can split it in half and have something done with it for the twins?”

Naruto blinks at him, and then picks the little pebble up, staring at it for a long moment before he looks up at his Dad. “A necklace, imbued with our essence. And your most powerful seals?”

Minato smirks. “It’d be my honor.” He nods towards Kushina. “I bet your mother wants to have a say in it though.”

Naruto snickers. “Yeah, I bet so, too.” He sobers slowly, and then shrugs, giving the pebble to Minato. “Would you, Dad?”

Minato hums, and then takes it, reaching out to ruffle Naruto’s hair with his other hand. “Sure.”

Naruto swats his hand away. “Hey.”

Minato grins. And then sobers, nodding at him, and then at Kakashi, holding up the pebble for a moment. “I’ll go and find out what we can do with this with Kushina…” He hesitates, and then shrugs. “And Kaguya.”

Kakashi blinks. “Think she’ll impart some knowledge for this?”

Minato shrugs. “Worth a try.”

 

Naruto nods, and then turns to Kakashi, taking his hand. “Wanna go and watch the stars with me?”

Kakashi squeezes his hand. “Don’t you want to celebrate with the others?”

Naruto shrugs, and then sends an apologetic smirk at Minato. “We’ll be back. But…” He shrugs again. “Our alone time will be over soon.”

Kakashi hums. “True.”

Minato shoves them gently towards the door. “Well, off then with you. I’ll cover for a few hours.”

Naruto snickers. “Thanks, Dad.”

 

He turns fully to Kakashi and puts his arm around Kakashi’s waist and then… there is a displacement of air and place, and then they’re up, up again on the Hokage heads, and Kakashi laughs out, when he sees the blankets and the picnic basket, ending in a snicker. “I see we’re staying for a while?”

Naruto waggles his eyebrows. “Well, we did discuss this at some point, didn’t we.”

Kakashi hums, turning to him, and drawing him in. “We did.” His hands glide up and round, fingers tracing the whiskers for a moment. 

He grins. “I do wonder how often you had to scrub these heads…”

Naruto snickers. “Often.” They share a chuckle, and Kakashi leans in, stealing a quick kiss. 

He whispers. “We have two hours till midnight.”

Naruto reaches up, snakes his arm around his neck. “Better make the best of it.” He waggles his eyebrows. “I have a request…”

Kakashi mouthes along his jaw. “Oh?”

Naruto lets his head fall back, with a grin. “Yeah.” He lifts his head again, licking his lips. “One finger, and your tongue only.” He exhales, shudderingly, with a sigh, and Kakashi can feel the heat pressing into his hip already. “Make me come while licking the seal, and rubbing my prostrate until I scream.”

Kakashi swallows, and then shrugs, lightly, while his own pants get tight. “Quite the challenge…”

Naruto gasps a laugh. “One you accept?”

Kakashi laughs, gutturally, walking him over to the blanket. “Ohhhh, definitely.”

Naruto grins. “Good boy.”

Kakashi waggles his eyebrows, while lowering him onto the blanket, and surveying him hungrily. “Do I get a reward?”

Naruto bites his lips, the blue eyes flashing, and rapidly getting darker. “Maybe?”

Kakashi hums, and then bends down to trail a finger down Naruto’s shirt. “Well, then I better do my best, hmmm?”

 

Naruto reaches up, to pull him down. “Yeah. You better.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He settles next to Anko on the bench, watching her eat some more Dangos.

 

Anko watches him for a long moment, and then shakes her head. “So. Who sends you?”

Kakashi grins, crossing his arms. “No-one. Though Shizune is a bit worried. She has noted that you put on weight.”

Anko snorts. “Oh give me a break.” She nods at the village. “Seeing Orochimaru slink around is hard.” She looks at the empty Dango stick in her hand. “And I earned it.”

Kakashi nods. “Definitely. Still…”

Anko rolls her eyes.

He sighs. “I don’t mean your weight. You know that. But do you really think it is a good thing to go and visit all those hideouts?”

Anko grimaces, and then hurls the stick into a trash can with precision, before sighing deeply. “Maybe, maybe not. I just feel it could do me good.” She looks at the scars on her wrist, at remnants of what was. “Find a way to deal.”

Kakashi grimaces, his voice soft. “I had hoped you would be happy…”

Anko’s eyes snap up. “I am, Kakashi.” She blinks, and then nods, before averting her eyes. “I am.” She shrugs. “But sometimes, there’s still something missing.” She looks back, directly into his eyes. “It’s why you trained your eye back then, isn’t it.”

Kakashi hums, leaning back on the bench. “Yes… and no.”

Anko smiles, sharply, a quick smile that bleeds. “See, I want to be able to protect again, too.”

Kakashi closes his eyes. “Do you really think you can find something in those hideouts that he has left there that you can use… even though you don’t want anything to do with him per se?”

Anko grunts, with a click of her tongue. “Worth a try.”

Kakashi exhales, and then shrugs. “Well. If anything, it will be good to have those hideouts scouted and documented.” He turns his head to look at her. “Don’t get yourself killed, I bet they’re full of traps still.”

Anko grins at him. “And I’ll release every one of them.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “I’m sure you will.”

 

He gets up, slowly, and then turns to face her, watches her look up at him placidly. “Have fun.”

She winks at him. “Will do, Rokudaime.”

 

He flips her the bird, and leaves, to her laughter.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

“Heard you talked to Anko today.”

 

Kakashi shakes his head, waving his sticks a bit. “What is it with this village. I mean, news and rumors travel faster than any Anbu?”

Iruka snickers, and then shakes his head, while finishing his bowl of ramen. “No, no, no, I talked to her after your talk. She dropped by.”

Kakashi grunts, rolling his eyes a bit. “Still.”

Iruka smirks, and then picks up his tea, tilting his head. “It’s good that you talked to her.” 

Kakashi grimaces. “Is it? I kind of felt like the last idiot.” And the last asshole. 

Iruka weighs his head. “It’s given her a purpose again. She came back with this weird little cackle, telling me that she ‘will find them all.’ Whatever she may mean with that.”

Kakashi smirks to himself. “I’ll warn Shizune.”

Iruka nods to himself. “You better.”

 

There is a small pause, where they both just watch Teuchi, who doesn’t pay them no mind.

Iruka leans in a bit. “So. Think Naruto is going to forgive you for going for ramen without him?”

Kakashi smirks, reaching for his own tea. “Oh I hope not?”

Iruka laughs, gutturally. 

Kakashi sends him a sideways look. “Got something like this with Obito, too?”

Iruka blushes, but grins, waggling his eyebrows. “Maybe?”

Kakashi chuckles, and then sobers, staring into his empty bowl. “Such a weird thing, to be here now, with you. And him. And them.” He shoots a look at Iruka. “It’s beautiful, beyond compare, this life.”

Iruka watches him, eyes flitting back and forth, with a little smile. “My, my, Kaka-kun, that is quite poetic.”

Kakashi waves him off, but shrugs. “It’s the first day of the new year. Life has changed.” He winks. “Time for some additional changes.”

Iruka narrows his eyes, and then points a finger. “You’ve been practicing?”

Kakashi waggles his eyebrows. “Maybe?”

Iruka rolls his eyes. “You’re full of shit, Rokudaime-sama.”

 

Kakashi leans back, points a finger. “Don’t make me flip you the bird, too.”

Iruka just laughs at him.

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Her hair feels the same, still, after all these years.

And it is even longer now, gliding through his hands.

 

He can sense her smile, but he keeps his focus on the red strands, on running the brush through, here on the porch.

Her voice is soft, dreamy. “Sends you back, doesn’t it.”

He chuckles softly. “It does.”

She tilts her head just  bit, to shoot him a quick look. “How come you’re not working?”

Kakashi shrugs, carefully taking another strand. “Shikamaru holds the fort until something happens. He…” He frowns, trailing off, then shrugs again. “For now.”

She nods, just lightly. “A last vacation?”

He hums. “Well, the doctors said it could be time very soon.” He leans sideways, looks at her with a grin. “Excited?”

Kushina hesitates, and then squeals, just a bit, clapping her hands. “Oh god, yes, Kakashi, can you imagine???” She leans back, tilting her head back to catch his gaze again. “I cannot wait to see what the genetics have mixed up into. A little you and a little Naruto!?”

Kakashi laughs at her. “You wish.”

Kushina rolls her eyes, but then chimes in. “Well, a girl can dream.” She sober slowly, shaking her head once. “No, really, just healthy will be perfect. But I am excited about how they’ll turn out.”

Kakashi hums, watching the red glide through his fingers. 

His voice is soft. “Me too.” He sniffs. “There is even a chance for red.”

Kushina exhales softly. “Yeah.”

 

There is a small pause.

Kakashi keeps on brushing. 

 

Kushina breaks the silence after a while, her face lifted into the sun streaming down into the small garden. “What name will they carry?”

Kakashi hesitates, and then frowns, before weighing his head. “You don’t think a double name would be good?”

Kushina hesitates, and then shrugs again, making Kakashi playfully growl at her when a strand of hair slips through his hands. “Maybe not good is not the right way to express it. But with the way you are both Hokages… or will be.”

Kakashi frowns, and then stops brushing, waiting until she turns to him. “Yes?”

She watches him. “Well, what do you think?” She blinks, a sly expression entering her features. “I know you have thought about it. Hatake Kakashi, the genius of this generation.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Prodigy at most. And there are new geniuses, now.”

She hums. “Indeed.” She taps her fingers. “Still.” Her eyes narrow. “What are your thoughts?”

 

Kakashi sighs, and then hands her the brush, pulling his knees up to link his arms around them.

He puts his head down, sideways, looking at her. “Well, I would like my children to have one name, yes, but I am also loathe to lose my clan name.” He frowns. “Likewise Naruto is very attached to his name, for obvious reasons.”

Kushina nods, waiting.

Kakashi licks his lips. “During the war Tobirama asked me to make sure something of his wife would remain, who was apparently a Hatake.”

Kushina’s voice is soft. “And now it does.”

Kakashi exhales. “And now it does.”

She smiles. “But?”

Kakashi lifts his eyebrows. “I like Uzumaki. But Hatake…” 

She nods. “You think it will then be buried with your father.”

He frowns, and then nods. “Yes.”

Kushina inhales deeply, and then nods, with a small smile. “Difficult.”

Kakashi snorts. “Yeah.”

Kushina reaches out to push her fingers through his hair, pulling the strands just a bit. “Maybe… you should find someone you can give the name to. Someone worthy.”

Kakashi blinks, staring at her. “Someone… worthy?”

 

She shrugs. “Yes.” Her fingers glide down, to cup his jaw, stroking the mask. “You’ll know, I think.”

He narrows his eyes. “Been taking a page from Kaguya’s book I see.”

Kushina laughs out, loudly, while shaking her head. “Ohhhh no, no worries, I’m not a tenth as cryptic.”

Kakashi watches her hair shift, his tone dry. “Great, it’s all knotted again.”

Kushina waves her hand at him. “Pfffft. We have the time?” She grins, and then turns her back to him, with a little wriggle. “Get to it, Rokudaime.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “What is it with people calling me by my title today…”

Kushina shrugs lightly. “You know we like to tease you.”

Kakashi grunts. “Yeah, still…”

 

They are silent for a while, watching the clouds drift sluggishly.

It is cold today, but it’s beautiful outside, and Kakashi is glad to be on the porch with her, to share this little moment, alone.

 

He breaks the silence again after a while, voice low and gentle. “When are Minato and Naruto coming back from their little trip?”

Kushina hums. “You mean, when will they drop down here, dusty, smelly and totally high on battling with each other the whole day?”

Kakashi laughs under his breath. “That.”

He can sense Kushina smile. “They said in the evening.” She snickers. “I don’t think we’ll manage to ignore them?”

Kakashi snorts. “True.” He brushes a bit more, and then asks, with a hum. “What will you do later on?”

Kushina shifts a bit, with a sigh. “I’m on for tea with Kurenai. And a bit of training with Mirai.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Oh?”

Kushina nods. “Yes, the little button is like her parents… she’ll be a very competent ninja one day.”

Kakashi smiles softly, remembering Asuma’s booming laugh. “I’m glad.”

Kushina tilts her head back, watching him for a moment. “Can’t wait to train yours!”

If you’re still here then. Kakashi smiles, a bit brokenly, and then nods once, his voice carrying the pain. “Me neither.”

Kushina reaches back to squeeze his hand, obviously hearing what he doesn’t say.

 

But she does so silently, and Kakashi is… glad.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

His tattoo pulses, and his gut churns.

Kakashi smiles.

 

Naruto and Minato do drop down, smelly, dusty and delighted, but they do so in the Hokage’s office, late in the afternoon, when the sun streams in, golden and warm.

 

Kakashi looks up, drawling. “Look what the cat dragged in.”

Naruto laughs, breathlessly, bending over the desk to kiss him. “Fox, but yes.”

Kakashi captures his lips for a long moment, and then draws back, with a grin. “Kurama liked his afternoon out?”

Naruto leans back, and then shares a look with his Dad, beaming. Once more Kakashi is struck with the similarities in the expression, in the smiles. “Oh yes. We went all the way down to that one creek on the way to Sunagakure, you know?”

Kakashi nods, sharing a grin with Minato, who is watching Naruto with this half-amused, half-annoyed expression, before turning to Kakashi.

“Yes, we ran, and trained, and did work with the baryon mode a bit more. I checked all the seals, and we did train with Kurama separately, too.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “I’m surprised you didn’t go to the moon instead.”

Minato laughs breathlessly. “I put up a barrier.”

Naruto scratches his head, a bit sheepishly. “Yeah, which was a good thing, I think we would have destroyed so much otherwise.”

Kakashi smirks, nodding to himself. “And now you’re all done, exhausted and ready for sleep?”

Minato grunts, pointing his thumb at himself. “Well, I am.” The thumb turns to Naruto. “He’s probably a spring chicken again already.”

Naruto preens a bit, but there is a blush on his face, that makes the whiskers glow. “You’re just jealous, dad.”

Minato rolls his shoulders, with a bit of a grimace. Kakashi can hear a joint pop. “Yes?”

Naruto snickers.

 

Kakashi presses a finger to the side of his nose for a moment, trying to keep the amusement at bay.

He opens his mouth to say something, but there is a displacement of air suddenly, and an Anbu, kneeling in front of him.

He lifts his eyebrows. “Yes?”

 

The Anbu bows his head. “Rokudaime, I was sent to tell you that Tenten-san has gone into labor.”

Naruto gasps, his eyes extremely bright suddenly. “Oh my god.”

Kakashi swallows, sharing a look with Minato. 

He nods. “Thank you. Is she at the hospital?”

The Anbu nods. “Yes, Hokage-sama. The contractions are still a few minutes apart.” 

Kakashi nods, too, standing up slowly. So it’s gonna be a while still. “Alright. I’ll go and talk to Shikamaru.” He nods at Minato and then grins at Naruto, pointing his finger. “You two - quick shower, and grab one of those food pills. It’s gonna be a long night.”

Minato smirks at him, and then takes an uncharacteristically silent, and vibrating Naruto by the shoulder. “Will do.” He nods at Kakashi. “See you there.”

Another swoosh, and then they’re gone, and Kakashi nods at the Anbu, dismissing him as well, before pressing his hand onto the desk for a long, long moment. 

 

And then he slowly walks around the desk, and out the door, keeping his gait unbothered, and his steps measured.

Opening the door to Shikamaru’s office with a bit of a flourish. “Shika, I’m sorry, this will be a long night.”

Shikamaru and his assistant look up, from where they’re sorting reports away. “Oh?”

Kakashi nods. “Yeah, looks like I will need to go over to the hospital soon.”

A slow smile spreads over Shikamaru’s face, there and gone again, replaced by annoyance. “Oh, Temari will be so pissed.”

Kakashi nods, and then shrugs, with a bit of a grimace. “I promise I’ll cover for you then, too?”

Shikamaru snorts. “You mean if you find babysitters then.”

Kakashi waves at him. “Oh, I hear Minato and Kushina want that job.”

They share a chuckle, and Kakashi hesitates, while Shikamaru watches him.

His voice is surprisingly soft. “You’re stalling, Kakashi.”

 

Kakashi rubs his temple. “I know.” He looks away for a long moment, sharing a look with the assistant, who blushes, and busies himself with the reports again, silently. “It’s just so weird, you know?”

Shikamaru steps up, slowly, and puts his hand on Kakashi’s shoulder. “I do know.” 

The hand tightens, and then pushes Kakashi round, and towards the door. “And now, Rokudaime, off with you.”

Kakashi grumbles, under his breath. “Always with the title today.”

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He arrives at the hospital, to find it terribly anticlimactic.

 

Tenten is walking up the length of the corridor, with Hinata at her side, and Kushina on the other, Naruto vibrating in one corner, hair still wet and uncombed, and Minato just arriving after Kakashi, his hair combed. 

There’s excitement in the air, but it is sedate, informed by the knowledge that it will take some hours still. 

Kakashi goes over to Naruto, taking him into his arms. 

Naruto squeezes him tightly, his face burrowing into Kakashi’s neck. “Finally.”

Kakashi chuckles softly, while sharing a quick grin with Hinata, who winks at him from her place at Tenten’s elbow, their twin baby bellies looking weird and alien for a moment. “Of course.”

He inhales deeply, lets the smell of Naruto’s hair and skin calm him, lets the deep satisfaction of their closeness rise, the need, before taking a small mental step back again.  

He mumbles into gold. “Have you talked to them?”

Naruto nods, once. “Yeah, Hina’s fine. I mean Tenet’s fine, too, just…” He fidgets.

Kakashi hums, stroking his back. “It’s ok, I get it.” He shares a grin with Kushina, who has taken Minato’s hand, and is keeping it between her own. “We’re all so super excited it’s been taking our brains.”

Naruto snorts, and then he nods, once, head coming up to capture Kakashi’s lips in a quick kiss. “Yeah.”

 

Neji arrives, breathless, and with Karin in tow, Karin, who hurries immediately to Tenten and Hinata, ignoring the others completely. 

And leaving Neji standing there in the middle of the floor, looking a bit forlorn.

Naruto snickers, and then breaks away from Kakashi, to step up to him. “Neji, so good of you to be here.”

Neji nods, his pale eyes huge. “Of course. I also informed Hanabi, she should be here soon.” He frowns. “What’s the status?”

Kushina steps up with Minato, only their hands betraying their nervosity. “Nothing new. We should probably get some coffee and snacks, if this is a normal birth we will be here a while. 

Neji nods, and then draws a hand over his face, rubbing it a bit. “Why don’t I go and get some co…”

 

A small cry, and a splatter, of fluid hitting the floor.

A pause, as everyone watches the spreading puddle, just a bit dumbfounded. 

 

Karin reaches up from Tenten’s other elbow, lightly patting her on the shoulder, while she surveys the mess on their shoes. 

Her tone is dry. “Looks like your water broke.” Her head comes up, and she pushes the glasses up on her nose. “Not so long now after all!”

Kakashi can hear Naruto swallow. 

 

 

Another pause, but this time it is one that has nothing to do with any events in the room.

 

 

This time, it is a shift in perception, somehow.

A sound, like a gong struck, but within the mind, within… awareness. 

 

 

 

And a booming voice, that runs through their very bones, but that seems to come from their own village, and from their minds. “Rokudaime.”

 

 

 

Minato’s eyes find his.

 

Of course.

 

It is now.

 

 

 

So that was that weird awareness of his title today.

 

Of course.

 

 

 

 

And Kakashi’s eyes turn red.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

Here comes the last big one :)

Chapter 67: That which is worth defending

Notes:

Kyokuchi supposedly means “perfection” in Japanese, I do hope it works as a name

And… I don’t know why but it had to happen that way.

This chapter contains art by vita-divata, who simply outdid themselves I think.

 

Aaaaannnnd - Kokodraws will post the last art (chapter 69) of this fic tomorrow. I have decided that I will post the last chapters together, over this weekend, since they are... closing this tale after this chapter. The tale found its ending like this, and I think it fits... hope you'll enjoy.
Chapter 68 tomorrow, chapter 69 and the epilogue in 70 on Sunday.

 

Here come the final parts... one last roller coaster :)) !!!

💕

Chapter Text

Calm descends, like a blanket.

 

It’s actually almost a relief, the weird wait for this event finally over.

 

 

 

Naruto is next to him, glowing and beautiful, speeding towards the gate, the event horizon transmitted to them through several Anbus, shadows now, that speed with them. 

Jiraiya drops down with Gamabunta, and Itachi catches his gaze for just a moment, before a pink bob clocks out his image in Kakashi’s vision, Sakura’s eyes alert, and wide.

“Sensei.”

He nods at her, eyes scanning the village, while they keep running. “Where’s Sasuke?”

Sakura smiles for just a moment. “Dropping Hanabi off at the hospital. Between her and Kushina they should be settled there. He will be here in a moment.” She looks past Kakashi at Naruto. “Guess we have to hurry today, huh?”

Naruto grins at her, ferally. “No way I’m missing the birth, dattebayo!”

Kakashi hums, and then nods at Tsunade, who has dropped down on a roof nearby. “We should try to lure our enemies to the training grounds.”

Sakura snorts. “True.” 

 

Sai joins them, his pale face solemn. “Rokudaime, the Yamanaka have informed me that the outer grid has alerted us as hoped. However the breach was done too swift, the approaching enemy too fast for a more leisurely analysis.”

Kakashi smirks a bit wryly, while turning a corner and entering the main road to the gate. “Yeah, I figured the voice we heard calling for me was not something we anticipated either.”

Sai looks a bit contrite. “An oversight. The barrier can be used to transmit backwards through our network.”

Kakashi nods, and then points his finger at Minato, who is crouching on the gate already, with Genma and Neji. “Please coordinate with the Yondaime. Have him coordinate all the necessary efforts. Since the enemy approaching called for me it is likely I will be not in the position to do so.”

Sai nods sharply and is off, obviously planning to catch some Anbu on the way.

 

Naruto looks at him, the golden pupils huge somehow. “Not in the position to do so?”

Kakashi shrugs, slowing down just a bit, and Sakura and Naruto do, too. They come to a halt in the place in front of the open gate doors, and Kakashi shivers, watching the night sky for a moment.

A displacement of air, and Sasuke joins them, rolling his shoulders. “Kakashi.”

Kakashi smirks to himself, watching Team 7 embrace for a long moment. 

 

He looks up and over to the side, where another red pair of eyes are watching calmly.

He beckons Obito over, with a tilt of his head. “Don’t just stand there…”

Obito huffs, hands in his pockets. “Not sure if you wanted me there…”

Kakashi steps to him, clasps his shoulder for a long moment. “Whyever not?”

Obito shrugs. “Another fight, another night…” He snorts and then lifts his hand, tapping Kakashi’s forehead. “Look who activated his Sharingan again…”

Kakashi slaps his hand away, but with a smile. “Weirdly enough it was only logical. I need it for…” He trails off, with a frown. 

 

It is Naruto who continues the sentence, stepping up to him. “For that which is worth defending.”

Kakashi inhales, deeply. “Yes.” He looks up at Minato, before looking back at Obito. “Think she’s here now, too?” 

Obito smiles slowly, and then nods once, while vulnerability flits over his face. “I know it.”

Sakura steps up to them slowly, arms crossed over the sizable bump of her belly. “Guess Team 7 is not done yet, past or present.”

 

Sasuke hums, his purple eyes fixed to the horizon. “Which is a good thing, because whatever comes there, it is massive.”

Kakashi follows his gaze, but he cannot see anything yet, the night sky beautiful and tender. 

He sighs, and steps up to Sasuke, while he feels all the ninjas of the village taking up their positions, silently. Minato catches his eyes for a moment, nods. “Do you have an estimation for when?”

Sasuke shakes his head, black hair shifting. “No.”

Kakashi scratches his jaw through the mask for a moment. “Do you know what it is?”

Again Sasuke shakes his head, the purple eyes fixed to something only he can see. “No. But it has an energy signature.”

 

Kakashi nods, slowly, echoing. “An energy signature.” He rubs his hands, sharing a look with Obito. “We can work with that.” He looks up at Minato, who nods, and then is there, in front of Naruto. 

Grinning, with a wink. “Yes?”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he smirks. “Sasuke says whatever is coming there has an energy signature.”

Minato quirks an eyebrow. “Some kind of propulsion, likely.”

Kakashi weighs his head. “Generators, engines, yes.” He shrugs. “I would like the task of getting those offline into your hands.”

Minato nods, and then points at Jiraiya on the toad in the distance. “Will do. I think Jiraiya would like to help.”

Kakashi nods. “Good idea. The toads can definitely be an asset for certain maneuvers.” He works his jaw, searching the assembled and waiting ninjas. “Sora should be around, too.” His gaze falls on Guy and Mei, who are waiting calmly a few feet off, listening, with Guy giving him a huge grin and a thumbs-up. He smirks softly, before looking back at Minato, and then at Naruto. “We need to bring whatever it is that is coming down outside the village.”

Naruto nods. “I’ll stop it.”

Sakura very calmly puts on her gloves. “We will.”

He grins at her. 

 

Kakashi smirks again, but then sobers, watching them both for a moment. “Don’t get cocky. Jiraiya once told me that the lessons in humility do get rarer the more powerful you become… but they do exist. Remember this is Kaguya’s… family. And they have evolved, while she hasn’t.” He frowns. “By the way, where is she?”

Naruto’s eyes unfocus for a moment, the crossed pupils staring right through him. “At the tower. She’s watching.”

Kakashi turns his head to look at the general direction of the tower, trying to shake the feeling of unease. “Alright.” He presses his lips together, seeing Konohamaru slip in-between the assembled ninjas. He sighs soundlessly. “We should not draw this fight out. No playing around. No assessing.” He looks at them all, one by one. “Full force, immediately.”

Obito grunts, weighing his head. “No talking?”

Naruto blinks, slowly. “They’re not here to talk.”

Kakashi frowns, turning to him. “You can sense them now?”

Naruto nods slowly, the expression on his face dark. “They’re only interested in her. The rest of us…” He pulls a face. “We’re just energy to them.”

Obito fiddles with a kunai. “I’m gonna play Devil’s Advocate here and just say it, but if we hand her over to them…” He trails off, quirking an eyebrow meaningfully.

 

Minato shakes his head, holding up his hand to silence Naruto, who had wanted to object, and heatedly, by the looks of it. “I don’t think that’s gonna help. From what I understood they always harvest the planets they visit. And…” He hesitates.

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, a sinking feeling in his stomach. “And?”

Minato sighs soundlessly. “And they need one of their own to sacrifice to evolve new powers.”

Sasuke blinks, staring at Minato, tone biting. “Convenient that she’s here. And alive.”

 

A hand falls onto Sasuke’s shoulder, squeezes it. “Easy, Sasuke.”

Itachi steps around him, sharing a quick look with Obito. His eyes are still dark. “I figured the stakes were as high for her as they were for us. Why else would she be so open to us, all things considered?”

Sakura pushes a strand of hair behind her ear. “Keeping them from her will annoy them.”

Naruto nods, mouth opening to say something, but he hesitates, turning to the direction Sasuke is staring at. “They’ve slowed.”

Kakashi rolls his shoulders. “Alright. Stations.” He nods at Minato, who is gone immediately. 

“Orders, Senpai?” Itachi’s eyes are dark.

Kakashi frowns, and then looks over at Guy and Mei. “Can I ask you to work with them to protect Kaguya?”

Itachi nods, sharing a quick look with Sasuke. “Of course.” 

 

Kakashi squeezes his shoulder for a moment, and then dismisses them from his thoughts, knowing they will manage. Somehow. 

He shakes his head, very slowly. “What else? What have we forgotten?”

Naruto grins. “The snacks?”

Sasuke groans.

Sakura snickers.

 

Kakashi opens his mouth, but Sasuke interjects, tone hard. “They’re here.”

 

Naruto turns his head, to look at Kakashi, with a smile that is feral, and then he flares up, and the gold shifts to red, with the red tails swishing.

 

Kakashi raises his fingers, to ghost them over the black lines around Naruto’s eyes, before purple lighting flares up in his hand. 

He nods. “Let’s do this.”

 

The leather of Sakura’s gloves creaks as she clenches her fist.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

 

The sound of the ship being stopped in its proverbial tracks by two fists had been deafening.

 

Granted, it had been slow at that point, a huge, hulking shadow over them, coming with a roar through the atmosphere and the very fabrics of reality. 

The passengers of it had likely not expected to be flung forward within it, as the cylinder shape had tilted up, nose down, up, up, with a groan of metal like a dying giant, only to be kicked down and away again by an enormous toad.

 

Kakashi had been able to hear Jiraiya laughing over the resulting cheer.

 

 

After the deafening sound… silence. 

 

 

 

And then… all hell had broken loose. 

 

 

 

 

First, there had been the drones.

 

These had been a nuisance, and fast. But the Nara clan had caught them in their shadow jutsus almost immediately, the shadows so carelessly provided by the ship’s external lights.

Konohamaru and his friends had had a field day taking them out one by one.

Still, some of the buildings behind the gate had been damaged, black smoke billowing up from smaller explosions.

 

Luckily, that had been nothing to worry about, since the inhabitants of those buildings had all been evacuated by then, courtesy of the Inuzuka clan going back and forth with their dogs and carrying everyone to safety.

 

 

 Then, two Otsotsukis, weird pale human-like shapes, obviously male, and a far cry from Kaguya’s serene beauty.

 

Those had taken more effort. 

 

The one with a fishing-rod like weapon had killed an Anbu, right before Sasuke had taken him on. There had been a flurry of jumps through space and reality, short distance, that Kakashi, Obito and Itachi had followed with their red eyes, while Naruto had gone and had distracted the big and seemingly clumsy one. 

 

Sakura and Sai had taken that one down, while Naruto had kept the fight outside the gates, with lots and lots of chakra hands, and some wooden walls from Tenzou.

 

Team 7, fighting. 

A team 7.

 

Does it matter which one?

 

 

There had been a pause, after. 

 

 

 

And then… a barrage of missiles, that Naruto and Konohamaru had shot out of the sky with Kakashi’s chidori. The few that had gotten through had been repelled by Temari’s wind style.

 

 

The gate had taken a tiny bit of damage from those.

 

 

 

Another pause after. 

 

 

 

Naruto, floating red and burning high above the open doors, in full view of the viewports.

There had been no way to look inside, the glass obviously one-way. 

Kakashi’s hand had twitched.

 

 

 

His and Minato’s eyes had locked.

 

 

And then. Then.

 

The Flying Thunder God formation had taken the ship out. 

 

Every piece of wiring, every visible panel, every control panel, every defense mechanism, every circuit, every cover… everything had been attacked and taken damage.

 

Kakashi had watched, in rising satisfaction, and rising irritation, as the ship had been disabled.

Dismantled.

 

Bit by tiny bit.

 

At some point Ino had sent the Inuzuka clan members in to collect anything that looked like anything usable. 

Shino had sent in bugs to destroy the rest. 

 

 

It had taken a while. 

 

 

In fact they’re still on it now, clearing the space in front of the gates from electronic and metallic and… whatever garbage.

 

 

 

Kakashi is nervous.

 

It’s just been working… too well. 

 

Next to him Obito rolls his shoulders for the umpteenth time.

Kakashi shoots him a look, only to see Obito freeze, mid-motion. “What.”

Kakashi grunts, and then shrugs, voice low. “It’s too easy.”

Obito continues to roll his shoulder. “No shit.”

Sora steps up to them, voice equally low. “I have the knife.”

Kakashi frowns, watching the busy commotion around the ship. “You have the knife?”

Sora nods, shooting him a look. “Yes. Should something more powerful exit that ship…” She trails off. 

Obito snorts. “Should? The way my insides are feeling right now, we’ll get our asses handed to us still.”

Guy interrupts, his deep voice as hopeful and strong as ever. “And yet the powers of our youth will prevail, and we will find victory within our hearts!”

Obito blinks, turns to him, and then turns back, with a little roll of his eyes.

Kakashi hides his smile. “I sure hope so my friend.”

Mei speaks up, collected and calm. “Your young soul-mate sure keeps us all enthralled…” She looks at him, with a quirked eyebrow. “That power output is magnificent.”

Kakashi nods, exhaling in a rush. “A power mode only he could achieve.”

Mei hums, and then clicks her tongue. “I would think long and hard before engaging him.”

 

Kakashi pulls a bit of a face, sharing a look with Sora before turning to Mei. “You think they’re letting us do all this damage because they’re analyzing?”

Mei tilts her head, the red lock of hair shifting away from the normally hidden eye for a moment. “Definitely.”

Obito grunts, shooting her a look. “She’s right, y’a know.”

Kakashi groans, fidgeting a bit with his fingers. “What do we do?”

Itachi steps up, slowly, his long black hair in a pony-tail. “Do? Nothing.” He shoots a look over at Sakura, who is hovering high up on the gate, watching. “They will engage Naruto when they are ready…” He pauses, and weighs his head. “Or when we have dismantled their ship thoroughly enough.”

Kakashi pulls a face. “But if they let us dismantle their ship…”

Sasuke interjects, tone hard, as are his eyes. “Kaguya opened dimensions, for travel. I’m sure they can do the same.”

Itachi nods. “It is likely they only did not because it may take extra effort.”

Obito hums. “And they probably didn’t expect our level of resistance.”

Mei twirls a lock of her hair. “If the two dead enemies are any indication, no.” She smiles, beatifically, and it makes Kakashi shiver. “Such an efficient takedown.”

He shifts to his other foot. “Let’s hope the last takedown is as efficient.”

 

 

 

There is a shift of air, right in front of their little group, and then a voice whispers, in their minds, like nails scratching down a blackboard. “Now I doubt that.”

 

There is this beat, this heartbeat, this moment of drawn-in breath where nothing happens.

 

And then four susanoo’s flare up, almost in the same instance, and Kakashi can feel Naruto’s attention snap to them, can see Sakura’s green eyes through that shimmering part of energy that is beyond the distortion of the susanoo, that tear in the very fabric of space and reality, that is widening by the second.

A pulse of his tattoo and Naruto is there, with him, a hand on Kakashi’s shoulder. 

Watching, silently. 

 

Down below, the space clears rapidly, Guy, Mei and Sora somewhere off to the side. 

Where the others are Kakashi doesn’t know, but it does not matter now, since all his attention is focused on the small boy that exits the rift anyways, the boy that looks small and very innocent.

Big black eyes, luminous pale skin, almost sheer. Two horns that wist and link over the head. 

Thin black lines on his skin, running like veins.

 

He’s wearing dark garments, with a pattern on them that echos the black lines on his skin.

 

Kakashi steps forward, just a bit. “Who are you?”

The boy floats forward and up, until he hovers in front of Kakashi’s susanoo, with his hands clasped in front of him. “I am Kyokuchi.”

Kakashi works his jaw for a moment.

The boy laughs. “You expected Isshiki?”

Kakashi blinks, watching the dark eyes. “We had reason to assume he would be the one to show up, yes.”

Kyokuchi laughs. “Isshiki has hidden after his defeat. He knows he cannot return until he has the fruit of this world, and has consumed it…” A small smile, almost kind. “Of course he will never get it now…” The dark eyes lift, to look into the general direction of the Hokage mansion. “Kaguya will be a fitting sacrifice, after all she has given our secrets away.”

Kakashi grimaces a bit. “Not enough.”

The boy smiles sharply, vicious looking little teeth visible for a second. “Even if she would have wanted, she does not know them all… not now, not after all this time. I have evolved five times since we last saw.” A ripple through the slim body, as if laughter shakes him, silently. Around him, the sky seems to waver.

Kakashi narrows his eyes. “Well. We will not let you harvest us. And we have dismantled your ship, and so you won’t leave this pla…”

Another ripple of laughter, and Kyokuchi grins now. It looks a bit deranged. “My ship was only a convenience to collect the others. I don’t need it. And since the others are dead now…” He sighs dramatically, and then smiles again. “Well, they don’t need it either.” He leans in a bit, the black eyes twinkling, heavily emphasizing. “And they don’t need you either.”

 

Kakashi grinds his teeth, trying to keep his anger from clouding his judgement. “There is no full moon tonight. No beasts you can use as fodder. There will be no tree.”

Kyokuchi giggles and then points behind Kakashi, at Naruto. “I need only him.”

Ice, settling deep in Kakashi’s stomach. 

He refuses to show it, though he is afraid that this… boy may sense it nonetheless. 

His voice is cold. “Over my dead body.”

Sasuke’s voice seems almost bored. Remote. Kakashi recognizes it from the battle-field then, and it sends a shiver down his spine, half dread, and half satisfaction. “And mine.”

Itachi and Obito do not say anything, just watch.

Kakashi wonders where Minato and the others are.

How far along Tenten is.

What the hell Guy and Mei are doing.

Sora.

 

He doesn’t dare to look away. “He will not be available either.”

Kyokuchi hums, tilting his head to the side a bit. “The thread of fate connecting you is strong… but not inseparable. I will enjoy severing it.”

Kakashi swallows, feeling Naruto’s presence behind him. Feels the hand in the small of his back.

Naruto’s voice is surprisingly calm. “We will not be separated.” He floats forward a bit, the red and black tails swishing. The lines on his face make him look otherworldly, but it is a very different look to the Otsotsuki’s, wild and fiery in contrast. “Any attempt to do so will be met with immediate force.”

Kyokuchi sighs, dramatically. “It’s no fun, really.”

He blinks, and the lines on his skin pulse, and then…

 

Thunder, in Kakashi’s ears. 

He doesn’t quite get what is happening at first. The susanoo seems to be gelatinous, hard to breathe in. And his breath is like a storm in his ears. His heart is a drum, and he feels the hits. 

He watches as Naruto is pulled forward by something invisible and flurry, watches the sluggish motions of his limbs as he passes by and out the susanoo.

Shivers, from the top of his head, to the soles of his feet.

Naruto’s eyes find his, red on red, for a moment.

 

Kyokuchi raises his hand, and there is a line glowing on it, a line, and don’t touch it, you must not touch it, whatever it is, you cannot touch that line, and Kakashi sees it come closer, about to connect with Naruto’s chest…

 

And then Minato is there, carrying Sora in his arms.

 

The knife finds the glowing line, while Minato weaves a complicated sign, that seems vaguely familiar.

Kakashi frowns, trying to remember, but it is all so slow, his thoughts…

 

Gravity slams up, through him, with a force that makes his teeth shatter.

He rolls to his side, with a grunt, trying to get his bearings, his eyes locking with Itachi’s for a moment, who seems to be just as disoriented.

Next to them Obito groans, pitifully.

Sasuke coughs. “Looks like the energy he wanted to employ was released…” He coughs again and then pushes up, on all fours, nodding at the surrounding houses. “Quite the blast.”

Kakashi grunts, forcing himself to stand up, trying to get his bearings beyond his head still swimming. He looks at the houses Sasuke is indicating, giving a quick nod. “Nothing too damaging though.” He looks up, to where Naruto is still floating in front of  Kyokuchi.

Kyokuchi, who is holding his hand, staring at it with an expression of fury.

 

Kakashi clears his throat, turning a bit, to find Minato and Sora, who are just getting up on the other side of Sasuke.

Minato seems to shiver.

 

Kakashi sniffs, with a frown, and then concentrates, the sharingan activating dutifully, the little wheels turning without much prompting.

Obito heartily slaps his back, and then does the same.

His voice is a whisper. “That won’t be the only thing he had up his sleeve.”

Kakashi nods, clearing his throat. “We should separate them.”

Itachi speaks up, his eyes still dark. Behind him, Sakura wipes dirt off her clothes. “He seems to have the power to travel dimensions, or at least that is how I interpret his earlier comments.”

Sasuke nods. “Yes, it won’t do to separate them. He can just return.”

There is a small pause, and then Obito shrugs. “Except, maybe, from one place.”

Kakashi sniffs, looking at him. “I cannot let you take him there, Iruka will have my hide if something happens to you.”

Obito swallows. “Yeah, but still, if I go up in susanoo, and then use kamui…”

Sasuke shakes his head, his purple eyes on their adversary. “You won’t be able to pull him through. There are distortion fields around him.”

 

Minato speaks up, stepping up to them, looking pale, but not shivering anymore. “The chains could manage.” He quirks an eyebrow, nodding at Naruto. “He could manage.”

Kakashi shakes his head once. “But we want to separate them.” He blinks, and then looks up. “What are they doing up there…”

Sasuke’s tone is beyond dry. “Playing tic tac toe?”

Kakashi blinks at him. 

Sasuke shrugs, and then hollers, loudly. “Hey Naruto! Stop trying to make that idiot’s head explode by your mind powers, and come down here for a sec?”

Kakashi opens his mouth, but closes it again, as Naruto drops down to them, right into the middle of their loose circle. Kakashi looks up, watching Kyokuchi stare at them a bit weirdly. 

Naruto glowers at Sasuke. “I wasn’t. I was trying to keep him occupied so you could come up with a plan.”

Kakashi keeps his eyes on Kyokuchi, who is rubbing his hand now, slowly. “And we have, something like it at least.”

Naruto follows his gaze. “And?”

Obito speaks up, very quietly. “Sasuke says you will need to pull him through the portal if I open kamui. Think you can do that?”

Naruto frowns. “You want to put him into kamui?”

Sasuke shrugs. “The only dimension he’ll likely won’t be able to control.”

Itachi nods. “It seems like a decent idea.”

 

A displacement of air, and Kyokuchi is there, floating right next to Naruto, in their midst.

He smiles softly. “A good idea, but it won’t help you.”

Kakashi gnashes his teeth, trying to calm his thundering heart. “Oh?”

Kyokuchi tilts his head, smiles at him. “My will is stronger. It will find the cracks in your little getaway dimension and rip it apart from the outside.”

Sakura speaks up, calmly, stepping up into their circle and between Itachi and Sasuke, behind Naruto. “You speak of it as if it were alive…” Her eyes find Kakashi’s, for a moment.

Kyokuchi scoffs. “You could never understand it. Such feeble minds as yours.” He looks at Sakura. “And especially you, with your already limited resources divided up to nourish a new life… pathetic, even though you wear the travesty of a karma symbol. Who taught you that? Did you steal the knowledge of it from my kind?”

Sakura blinks, and then smiles, sweetly.

Kakashi can see Itachi, Sasuke and Naruto wince.

Her voice is a slightly higher pitch, very… cute. “Well, I’ve had the best teachers…” She winks at Kakashi, and then leans in, with a small sigh. “I’ll be happy to show you?”

Kyokuchi scoffs. 

Sakura leans back, and then shrugs, arms flying out with it in an exaggerated way, before turning away slightly, totally innocently. Kakashi can see the lines running out from the symbol on her head. Naruto shifts his stance. 

Kakashi can see Obito smirk from the corner of his eyes.

 

Sakura blinks up to Obito.

 

Time seems to slow once more, but this time he can breathe, and gravity stays where it is.

 

Well. For the most part.

 

The chains erupt a the same time that Sakura’s line have fully formed, and Naruto grunts, when they impact.

There is no blood, no visible hook, but Kyokuchi grunts, his black eyes narrowing. 

Naruto’s red tails wrap around him, when Sakura’s arms enfold him from behind. 

Reality twists, obediently, as Obito opens kamui, and then there is a grunt from several mouths, as Sasuke barrels the group into the portal.

For a moment, it seems as if Kyokuchi may stop their momentum at the very threshold, but the world wavers, and then spins, and it pulses red, and Kyokuchi frowns, and obviously loses that grasp of reality just enough.

Kakashi launches himself through the portal, just as Itachi releases the genjutsu again, Konoha reappearing behind the tear in fabric and time.

 

A whirlwind of stone and slabs, hurled at Naruto and Sakura.

Sasuke’s sword flashes, literally cutting them out of the way.

 

The chains groan, and Kakashi’s gaze snaps to them, his heart beating in his throat. 

He knows he’s screaming. “Everybody out except me and Obito.” His hand flies out to point. “Obito, close the portal. Sasuke, take Sakura and Naruto, and…”

 

An explosion, of light.

The sounds of the chains rupturing, like bells. Big bells. 

Sakura is thrown back, with a cry.

 

Fuck.

 

His gaze whirls round, to see the portal gone, at least.

Obito is next to him, red-eyed and with a weird expression on his face, almost manic.

Kakashi blinks, knowing he probably wears the same.

 

Black bone rods, whirling around them.

 

Kakashi uses mud style to shield them, watching Sasuke’s sword flurry through the air once more, cutting them into little pieces. 

He looks over at Obito. “I’ll use chidori, and we’ll charge him.”

Obito nods, kunais in hand.

 

A thud to the mud wall on the other side, and they dart apart, only to see that it is Naruto, the tails like a shield in front of him, but bleeding from a shallow cut.

He snarls at Kakashi. “He’s fast. I haven’t been able to hit him.” Another shower of rods, and this time Kakashi raises the wall in front of the three of them. He hopes Sakura is somewhere safe. 

Naruto’s eyes are burning. “You need to pin him somehow, so I can hit him.” He narrows his eyes. “Sakura was able to hold him, my strength should be enough to punch him.”

Kakashi shakes his head, vigorously. “No. I want you gone. We don’t know if he can start the process through you from here.” He locks eyes with Obito. “This is our fight.”

Obito smirks grimly.

Naruto seethes at him. “You cannot be serious.” He points his thumb. “He just broke through the modified chains.”

Sasuke flashes into space behind them, with Sakura in his arms. 

He sounds almost breathless. “True. We will need to weaken him before we can try that again.”

Sakura narrows her eyes. “I will extract his will.”

Naruto shakes his head. “No, won’t work. It’s not separated, as Kaguya’s was.”

Kakashi blinks, tapping his foot once. He looks at Sasuke. “Please get Minato and the knife.”

Sasuke is gone, and Obito harrumphs, tone beyond dry. “So happy I never tried to lock him up here.”

Kakashi cannot help himself, he snickers. “You do realize he didn’t have the eyes then.”

Obito waves him off. “He’d have found a way and you know it.”

Another shower of bone rods, and the mud wall breaks, but Naruto catches them, with dozens of chakra hands. 

Sakura grimaces, and then nods at the hovering figure in the distance, over what looks very destroyed terrain. “I tried to hit him a few times. As Naruto said, he’s fast. Faster than Kaguya was.”

Kakashi nods.

 

Another displacement of air, and Minato is there, with Sasuke.

He nods at Kakashi. “Sasuke said you want me to separate energies?”

Kakashi nods, watching him, watches the way he moves. “Can you?” He doesn’t add the question that burns on his tongue, the inquiry in regards to Minato’s… health. Because he still looks very pale. 

Minato nods, answering his unspoken question. “Yes. The earlier attack and the seal took a lot of my energy, but I will manage.”

Kakashi looks at him for a moment, and then ducks his head, as one of the rods gets through and flies over his head, to a cursed ‘sorry’ from Naruto.

He clicks his tongue. “Alright. Obito and I will distract him, Minato and Sasuke will corner him and try to separate his energies.” He turns to Sakura. “And then it will be your job to draw it out of him, too.”

Naruto turns his head, to look at him. “What about me?”

Kakashi smiles at him. You’ll be the bait. “You’ll have trouble with your Baryon mode… oops.”

Naruto grins at him, ferally. 

Kakashi’s tattoo pulses, and he swallows, with a nod. “Let’s do this.”

 

Obito’s eyes find his, red on red.

Naruto reaches out, to clasp his shoulder.

Sasuke smirks at Sakura.

 

And Minato… Minato just smiles softly.

 

 

And then… all hell breaks lose.

 

Time slows, while sounds echo.

 

 

 

Naruto’s eyes grow wide, as blood fountains from several ruptures in his shoulder and upper chest, the spray of red showering them all.

His expression is a grimace of pain.

The bullets fly by, miniatures of the bone rods, and sharp.

The Baryon mode flickers, and then the chakra coat fades, as more bullets hit Naruto’s back.

 

A searing pain, along Kakashi’s cheek, as he manages to avoid the one that had just gone through Naruto’s bicep.

Sasuke curses and is gone, while Obito envelops Sakura in susanoo, Sakura, whose seal glows, and whose chest is red, too, the tunic drenched, and …

Minato squeezes his shoulder, the blue eyes hard.

 

He is bleeding, too, but it seems superficial, and he is bending down, slowly, is it slowly?, to shake Kakashi.

Kakashi rears up, and Minato smiles grimly, and vanishes, and the susanoo fades, as Sakura is teleported away. 

 

This time, when Obito’s eyes find his, there is fury in them.

And something else, something Kakashi cannot place.

 

Purple lightning flares up, as his right hand grips a kunai.

Obito has the star kunais in his hand, a big one, and small ones.

 

In the distance, Kyokuchi laughs, his dark eyes twinkling.

 

Kakashi goes… cold.

 

It feels natural, to charge at him.

There’s no bullets now, though Kyokuchi’s fingers are outstretched, pointed at them.

There’s no sound now, except the one of their feet, hitting the ground.

There’s no feeling, except the passing of oxygen in and out of their bodies.

 

No thought, just a pulse, in his gut.

 

 

vita-divata Obito and Kakashi

 

 

 

Obito’s weapons whirr through the air, find their mark.

Black blood oozes, sluggishly.

 

Black blood that collects at Kyokuchi’s feet, changes shape.

Spreads, into a black wall, glistening and wet.

Kakashi watches himself raise his fist, watches the reflection of himself prepare to punch through. 

The black mirror shatters, into a million little drops.

 

Drops that tumble through the air, not bound by gravity.

Wetness, on Kakashi’s face.

 

Obito’s eyes find his. There’s fury in them.

And…

 

Kakashi frowns. 

The lightning is chirping, his chidori enhanced now with the purple lightning post-war workaround.

Their feet are hitting the ground in sync.

Kyokuchi is laughing.

 

Black mirror, shattering.

 

Wetness, on his face.

 

 

 

Damn.

 

 

 

Kakashi’s eyes find Obito, the fury in them replaced now by something different.

 

Obito’s mouth is a thin line, while his hand clenches on his weapon. 

His voice is a hiss, that echoes. “Genjutsu.”

 

Shattering mirror, and wetness.

 

Kakashi nods, while his muscles are contracting to push him forward.

There really isn’t any time in this loop, just this one and a half seconds, before it resets.

At any other time he would have found it masterful, but now it is merely aggravating, annoying, he clenches his teeth. “How do we…”

 

Shatter. Wet.

 

Obito shakes his head, with a grimace, when he hurls the star kunai. “What is the start?”

 

Kakashi watches the reflection on the black blood oozing from the wounds.

 

Shatter. Wet.

 

He grimaces, watching the purple flare. “The wounds?”

 

Obito grunts, as he throws the weapons, his muscles locking.

The mirror builds.

He snarls. “I can not not throw them.”

 

Shatter. Wet.

 

Kakashi’s eyes find Obito’s. “Our eyes.”

 

Obito hurls the kunai. “Locked sharingans?”

 

Shatter. Wet.

 

Kakashi tries to squeeze his eyes shut, to no avail. “We caught each other I think.”

Obito grunts, moving to hurl the star. “How?”

Kyokuchi laughs.

 

Shatter. Wet. 

 

Kakashi grunts, as he starts to charge. “Not sure. How do we break it?”

Obito whirls the star kunai. “I can’t change the direction.”

Kyokuchi’s eyes twinkle, as dark blood oozes.

 

Shatter. Wet.

 

Kakashi watches the frustration in Obito’s eyes. “What is our advantage?”

Obito frowns, while the star kunai hits. “Advantage?”

 

Shatter. Wet.

 

Kakashi nods, red eyes on red eyes. “The only one we have?”

Obito’s eyes flash, catching on. “This is my dimension.”

Kyokuchi’s eyes are dark.

 

Shatter. Wet.

 

Kakashi grunts, pushing off. “We’re still physically there.”

Obito smiles a snarled smile, the purple lightning playing grimly on his face. “But we don’t know what’s happening there.” He grunts, throwing the star kunai. “What if they’ve caught him already?”

 

Shatter. Wet.

 

Kakashi shakes his head, while the chidori chirps. “No. We’d be out of this then.”

Obito nods. “Right.”

Kyokuchi watches them, a smile on his lips.

The blood oozes.

 

Shatter. Wet.

 

Kakashi snarls, chidori flaring up. “Transport out.”

Obito grunts, the red eyes pained. “I cannot even blink.”

Kakashi watches the reflection of the purple lighting in the mirror.

 

Shatter. Wet.

 

He grunts. “That’s because it’s a visual trap. But we can talk.”

Obito hurls the star kunai. “I usually do not need vocal commands for my jutsus anymore.”

Kakashi’s feet hit the ground in sync with his. “Humor me.”

Kyokuchi’s eyes flash.

 

Shatter. Wet.

 

Kakashi’s voice is breathless. “Now!”

Obito screams, as his hand forms the seal while gripping the star kunai. “Kamui!”

 

Kyokuchi’s dark eyes widen, in fury, as the world twists.

 

 

 

Wind, rushing by. The world is far away, and there’s stars, everywhere. 

It’s cold, and surprisingly peaceful for a moment.

 

Kakashi grunts in pain as he connects with an object, a pale hand steadying him. “Rokudaime!”

He turns, with a grimace, blinking up at Sai. “Sai. What…” He trails off, turning on his hands and knees to look down off the conjured bird that’s caught him.”

He frowns. “Where’s Obito?”

Sai blinks at him, collected as always. “Not here.”

Kakashi blinks, and then looks up for a moment, into the night sky, with a frown. “I see.” Where are you, Obito? Still stuck there?

He grimaces. “What about the others?” He feels for Naruto for a moment, the echoing pulse weak, but there, and coming with a world of relief. “Are they here as well?”

Sai shakes his head. “No. There have been more drones, and they released several platoons of foot soldiers.” He nods at the village below them, where explosions and lightning can be seen. Huge shadows move back and forth between the houses, in the shape of toads. “It’s a mess, but we have them under control.”

Kakashi rubs over his face. “Alright.” He looks up into the night sky once more. “I need to return.”

Sai blinks. “Neither Sasuke nor Obito are here.”

Kakashi hums, and then smirks, with a wink. “I don’t need them to get to Naruto.”

 

He closes his eyes, and exhales, reaching.

 

 

Nothing, nothing, and the cold of space, for a moment.

 

 

Kakashi gasps, the impact of being hurled onto the ground once more taking his breath. 

Minato’s hand pulls him up, hastily, pulling him behind a border. “Kakashi. You’re late.”

Kakashi grunts, pushing himself up with a grimace. “The little asshole can trap in genjutsus.”

Minato nods, breathless. There’s blood on his face, and on his clothes, but it looks superficial. 

He points over to the other side, where Obito is standing, staring into space. “Yeah, Obito is still stuck in it.”

Kakashi grimaces. “He probably used up all his mental energy to alter the pattern to get me out.”

Minato quirks an eyebrow, tone vaguely amused. “Must have been some illusion, to trap you in it.”

Kakashi twists around, to try to check on the others, but there’s only a cloud of dust in the distance, and the impression of a fight. “Yeah, well, it wasn’t as sophisticated as what Itachi had trapped me in back then…” He trails off, turning back to look at Minato. “But it was short and very efficient. Based on visuals.”

Minato nods, and then licks his lips. “I managed to draw the knife down the chakra path for will. Sakura had just started to draw the black thing out when he turned on her, totally ignoring Sasuke. Or Naruto. She conjured some of those black rods herself to fend him off.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow. “Well, that means he knows what we mean to do, unfortunately.” He looks back at the dust crowd. “Naruto and Sasuke are trying to pin him down?”

Minato nods again. “Yes.”

Kakashi frowns, watching him. “Why did you pull me behind the boulder? He is distracted and there’s no more bullets right now?”

 

Minato smiles sharply. “For talking, Kaka-kun.” He clicks his tongue. “I thought we could do a double tag.”

Kakashi blinks. “Flashing back and forth to Naruto, and…?”

Minato waggles his eyebrows, nodding at a point behind Kakashi. “And here. I brought a hiraishin kunai.”

Kakashi nods slowly, and then lowers his voice, though he does not know why. “You used the knife but you haven’t applied the seal yet, have you.”

Minato clears his throat, his blue eyes on Kakashi’s for a long second. “No.”

Kakashi’s voice is a whisper. “What does that seal require.”

Minato smiles, beatifically. “It’s a separation of life-force, Kaka-kun. It requires life-force.”

Kakashi swallows, watching him, while ice settles in his stomach. “Your own.”

Minato ducks his head, looking surprisingly tired when he looks back up. “I’m already dead, Kaka-kun. I’m living on borrowed time already.” He smiles again, a smile full of humor and warmth. “I’ve known that my time would be shorter than Kushina’s time here for a while now.”

Kakashi’s voice shivers, trying to talk past the lump in his throat. “Yeah? Since when.”

Minato reaches out, to pull at a strand of Kakashi’s hair, an action weirdly intimate and familiar, and still feeling utterly alien right now, as everything seems to be out of focus. “Kaguya told me, in one of our discussions.”

Kakashi swallows, trying to stay composed, the world blurry. “Does K… does she know?” He swallows again, voice broken. “Does Naruto?”

 

Minato exhales, in a rush. “Kushina does, yes.” He snorts. “She’s ignoring it, daring me to leave her alone.” He chuckles. “If it really happens that I have to go first I better find a good place to hide in the afterlife.”

Kakashi snorts, and then chuckles, helplessly, while reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose.

Minato reaches up to clasp his shoulder. “Naruto doesn’t.”

Kakashi sniffs, with a nod. 

He shakes his head once. “Is it definite?”

Minato shrugs. “You know how Kaguya is… she didn’t give a timeframe.” He shrugs again. “Just… ‘sooner’.”

Kakashi nods, and then points a finger. “Alright. I’m taking a page from Kushina’s book ignoring the rest, too, and hereby inform you that there is no way in hell that this will be today, because my children are being born and there is no place you could possibly hide in afterlife if you miss out on that.”

Minato snorts, and then smirks, softly. “Let’s kick that ass, hmmm, Kakashi?”

Kakashi lowers his finger, very slowly, trying to really see Minato for a long moment. 

He smirks painfully. “Yes, Sensei.”

Minato winks at him.

 

A small explosion in the distance, and Kakashi sighs, nodding to himself. 

He snorts. “You know, I may be just emotionally charged enough now, to rip that little fiend apart.”

Minato snorts. He squeezes Kakashi’s shoulder once more before pushing up. “On three?”

Kakashi nods, pushing up as well, with a sigh. 

He doesn’t recognize his own voice. “On three.”

Minato nods. “One.” 

Purple lightning flares up. 

Minato exhales. “Two.”

Chidori chirps, the white and purple flickers making Minato look even paler.

Minato forms a seal with his right hand, his eyes vacant for a long moment. “Three.”

 

Nothing, nothing, and the cold of space, but this time for just an instant.

 

 

 

It’s a blur. 

 

There’s no sense behind the motions, everything instinct, the cold of space fusing with the heat of Naruto’s chakra as he brushes by, and the thermal release of energy as Sakura’s fist hits the floor. 

Twice Sasuke almost cuts him in half with the sword, the purple eyes widening when he flashes away just before the hit.

Kyokuchi is a shadow between them, flickering in and out of existence.

 

It seems to take forever, too.

 

But there is this moment, eventually, this moment, where Sakura hits the ground, where Sasuke’s sword arches charged with chidori, where purple lighting cuts off the way behind Kyokuchi, and where Naruto has conjured so many kage bunshin that there is no inch of the plane uncovered… that moment, where Minato’s palm connects.

 

And it’s a punch, to all their centers.

 

All their hearts.

 

Kakashi can hear his own sob echo, in the stillness that follows.

 

Naruto’s bunshin vanish, as he bends over. 

Sakura’s shaking hand comes up, black tar collecting on white skin.

Red bubbles from Naruto, and the black lines on his face vanish, merge, bleed into the form of Kurama, solidifying slowly. 

Minato’s skin cracks, along his jaw. 

 

Sasuke drops his sword, sinks down behind Sakura to hold her when she threatens to fall over. 

 

Kurama trots up to Kyokuchi, slowly, and then sinks his teeth into the skin, into beyond, and Kakashi watches in fascination as he starts to pull out the black tar as well, helping Sakura.

Naruto is panting, watching, with wide eyes. 

Belatedly Kakashi realizes that Naruto holds onto Minato’s hand, in a death grip.

Kakashi sniffs, and reaches for Minato’s other hand, sharing a small smile with him in the process.

Minato’s voice is raspy. “Looks like I’m still here.”

Naruto sniffs, watching as Sakura and Kurama pull the black thing out, bit by bit. “I want you to take a bit of my chakra.”

Minato ducks his head. “Naruto…”

Naruto’s finger flies up. “No discussion.”

Sasuke snorts. “Give some to Sakura as well.” He looks at Kyokuchi, who seems rigid, wide-eyed and furious, but weirdly unimpressed. “We will still need to bind him after.”

Naruto nods. “Yeah, I mean after, I can use the chains again, right. If he still bears us ill-will that is.” He sniffs. “And Mom can help me.”

 

Kakashi makes himself exhale. “Right. And I want Ino to use the new system, if we need to.”

Minato turns his head, to look at him, searching his eyes. “That is a good idea.”

Sasuke chuckles darkly. “A come here and find out warning.”

Kakashi licks his lips. “Yes.” He looks to Minato for a moment, and then shrugs. “We talked about that.”

Minato smirks. “Still risky.” He exhales also, watching as Kyokuchi’s form starts to shiver, while his dark eyes swivel back and forth between them, obviously listening to them.

He lowers his voice, a whisper for Kakashi alone. “And doing so would…”

Kakashi nods, grimly, interjecting. “I know.”

 

Sakura’s voice interrupts them, sounding exhausted. “Almost done.” 

Kakashi squeezes Minato’s hand, and then moves in, watching silently. 

He nods at Naruto. “You will need to support her I think.”

Naruto nods, also moving away from Minato, who slumps a bit, in an uncharacteristically inelegant heap on the floor. 

His hands start to glow with chakra, which he presses onto her back, next to Sasuke’s hands.

Sasuke who quietly quips. “So I’m the only one who hasn’t learned to heal?”

Kakashi snorts, winking at him. “I can’t either.”

Sasuke shoots him a look. “I should’ve known.”

 

Kyokuchi groans, his words pressed out between clenched teeth. “You cannot believe this will work.”

Kakashi shrugs. “We have seen it work.” He nods at the young face, with the dark eyes. “And I think you wouldn’t be so still if it didn’t work at all.” He hums, watching fury in the dark eyes. “How old are you, really, I mean.”

Kyokuchi scoffs, while his limbs start to tremble. “I am older than this pathetic planet. You cannot believe you can actually entrap my will. All you are doing is keep my body powerless.”

 Sakura grunts. “We’re not entrapping it.” She smiles sharply, while some sweat drops off her forehead. “We’re extracting it. I will absorb it.”

Kyokuchi frowns, and for the first time Kakashi can see something like fear mixing in the dark gaze. “Ex… tracting?”

Sakura nods, enthusiastically, some color back in her face. “Oh yes.” She winks at Kurama, who is inching backwards to her still, as if in slow-motion. “Kaguya used this as a last means to escape imprisonment, but…” She shrugs carefully, leaning forward a bit, to look at the black mass. “But by doing so she split off all her ill-will. When I absorbed it the last, metaphysical connection to her was severed, and she…” She shrugs again, and then smiles, beatifically. “She was free.”

Kyokuchi stares at her, in abject horror. Echoing flatly. “Free.”

Sakura nods, and then leans back, and something gives, and she falls back, Kurama tumbling over like a cat doing somersaults, Sasuke catching her with an effort, while Naruto moves aside, to catch Kyokuchi, who has fallen down.

 

She pants, staring at the wobbly mass in her hands, Kurama’s snout still in it. “There you are.”

 

Kyokuchi wimpers. 

Kakashi looks at him, there in Naruto’s arms, suddenly looking like a boy only, a forlorn boy.

He moves in a bit, trying to read the dark eyes. “Release Obito from the genjutsu.”

The dark eyes blink, and then something stubborn enters his features. “No.”

Kakashi frowns, looking up at Sakura. “I thought…”

Sakura inhales deeply, and then exchanges a look with Naruto, who shakes his head. 

She licks her lips. “While it obviously worked to some attempt I think the core root could not be extracted.” She blinks up at Kakashi. “Guess we’ll need to bind him, as feared.”

Kakashi swallows, watching the shivering body.

He leans in. “Kyokuchi, please. For your own well-being…”

Kyokuchi snarls at him, the sharp teeth flashing. “I will eat your soul!”

 

Kakashi sighs, soundlessly.

He looks over at Sakura. “What now?”

 

Kurama speaks up, releasing the bit of thing he had bitten into, and yawning, and shaking himself. “NOW SHE SHOULD ABSORB HIM. LIKE THE OTHER.”

Naruto frowns. “Do you think that’s wise? What of the baby?”

Kurama scoffs. “HER CHAKRA POOLS ARE ALREADY CONNECTED WITH THE LIFE THAT IS GROING INSIDE HER, JUST AS IT IS FOR EVERY BEING. THE BABY… WILL SIMPLY GET ITS FAIR SHARE.”

 

There is a pause, and then Minato quips, sounding tired but also weirdly amused. “And the next generation will surpass the current one…”

Kakashi snorts, rubbing a hand over his face. 

He sighs, and then shrugs, looking at Sakura. “Your choice.” He clicks his tongue. “We’ll find another way if we need to.”

Sakura frowns at him, and then she looks down at Kurama, who settles down, head on his paws, tails swishing. She rolls her eyes. “It’s always good to know the children will be strong enough to fend for themselves, isn’t it.”

Kurama winks at her.

Minato’s voice carries vulnerability now. “It is.”

Kurama turns his head to look at him. “GETTING SENTIMENTAL ON ME, YONDAIME?”

Minato grins sharply. “Always.”

 

Sakura nods, and then rolls her shoulders, concentrating. 

The lines on her body start to pulse, in sync with her heartbeat, and for a moment it seems as if Kyokuchi would try to interfere, but he simply twists around to watch, seemingly terribly fascinated, and fatalistically transfixed.

 

The pulses get faster, and then, suddenly, the mark on her forehead glows, and the thing in her hands flows into her, into the lines on her skin.

Her eyes fly open, with a gasp, black orbs staring unseeing. “Just… one moment.”

Kakashi shifts, feeling Sasuke and Naruto twitch, too.

 

Sakura lifts her hand, slowly, very slowly… and then snaps her fingers.

 

 

Once.

 

 

Obito crumbles into a heap onto the stony floor, panting harshly.

Kakashi looks over to him, a weight he wasn’t aware of dropping off his chest.

He swallows, nodding once. “Thank you. And now, finish it.”

 

Sakura smirks.

 

She blinks, and her eyes clear, like swirls being diluted by light.

The lines on her body pulse one more time, and then become dull, before they finally retract, into her seal.

 

Kyokuchi’s voice is calm, and resigned. “And so I have been defeated, by a modified karma seal.”

Kakashi frowns. “Karma?”

Kyokuchi scoffs, very softly. “Ah, the irony.” He falls silent.

Kakashi pulls a face, but drops the subject for now, with a look at Minato, who shrugs.

He claps his hands. “Alright. Time to leave here.” He looks over at Obito. “Can you, or should Sasu…”

Obito interrupts, dragging himself over to them, looking ashen, but powerfully pissed. 

His tone is clipped. “I can.”

 

Kakashi nods, and then shares a quick look with Naruto, who tries to hide his grin.

 

 

Obito rolls his eyes, and then concentrates, and the world twists, and… there is a moment of wind again, and cold, and then leathery, moist skin catches them, and Kakashi picks himself up just a bit, slowly, to look up at the shadow towering over them, arms crossed, and the long hair flying with the wind.

And the booming voice, underlaid with laughter: “You really took your time!”

 

Kakashi snorts, and then rolls back over, to look at Naruto, who is holding Kyokuchi with chakra hands, while Kurama sits next to him, pushing his snout into the wind.

And who promptly coughs, when Gamabunta puffs on his pipe and the smoke envelops them for a moment, like a cloud. Obito also coughs, rather pointedly.

 

Sakura pulls a face, before she addresses Sasuke. “Would you…?”

Sasuke nods, and they’re gone, and Kakashi smirks gently, before sitting up fully this time, reaching for Jiraiya’s extended hand. 

He shifts to keep his balance, as Gamabunta lands and takes off with another jump. “So. Is Konoha still standing?”

Jiraiya snorts, and then nods into the general direction of the sun, the first rays of it just crawling over the horizon. “Look for yourself!”

 

Kakashi turns and holds out his hand for Obito in the process, who in turn helps Minato up, after.

He watches the thin rivulets of smoke rise still, the way some parts of the village seem to be smudged, evidently damaged.

He turns his head to look at Jiraiya. “More or less, then.”

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow, with a click of his tongue. “Mostly.” He hesitates, and then nods at Kyokuchi. “Did it work?”

Minato nods, hand coming up to rub along the line on his jaw. “It did. And better than feared.”

Jiraiya watches him with dark eyes for a long moment, and then sniffs, with a nod. “Glad to hear it.” He looks at Naruto. “And you, where should I drop you off?” 

Naruto’s eyes find Kakashi’s. “The hospital?”

Kakashi blinks. Right. But he shakes his head. “No.” He pulls a face. “We need to finish this now, send the message of his defeat as fast as we can. The more efficient his defeat, the less likely for them to try again.”

Minato nods, sounding tired but sure. “Agreed.” He looks at Jiraiya. “Bring us to Yamanaka Ino please.”

Obito inhales deeply, looking a bit green around the gills. “This motion is making me sick.”

Jiraiya snorts. “You look like shit.”

Obito glowers at him. “Being trapped in a genjutsu will do that for you.”

Jiraiya quirks an eyebrow, voice sharply teasing. “Oh? Did you manage to be the only one trapped in one?”

Kakashi clears his throat, and steps between them, hands up. “No he didn’t.” He fixes Jiraiya with a stare. “Let’s discuss that later, alright?” He turns his head to look at Obito, who is quite obviously not amused. 

 

Gamabunta drops down then, landing in front of the gates with a huff. “As requested.”

Jiraiya hops off. “Let’s finish this.”

 

Kakashi turns to Naruto, holds out his hand. 

Naruto grins, and then takes it with both his own, holding Kyokuchi with chakra hands.

Kurama’s tails twitch. “CAN I STAY OUT A BIT MORE? DO YOU NEED ME?”

Naruto shakes his head. “No, stay a bit if you want.” He looks up at Obito. “Do you want to stay here as well?”

Obito shrugs, his eyes back to their normal dark color. “If that’s ok. The rift took a lot of energy.”

Naruto nods. “That’s alright. We’ll manage, dattebayo!”

Kakashi grins to himself.

 

Naruto hops off, and Kakashi follows him, walking after him towards the gates.

He can feel Minato behind them, though Jiraiya stays close to Gamabunta.

 

Ino runs at them, followed by Gai and Mei, and Sai. 

She sounds breathless. “Rokudaime.” She halts in front of them, nodding at Naruto, her eyes flitting to Kyokuchi only for the smallest time. “Rokudaime, there is a flurry of signals, Sasuke says it might prove too much if they all reach us, I mean we managed fine with this one, but apparently…”

Kakashi holds up his hand, interrupting her. 

He swallows. “I understand.”

He shares a look with Naruto, and then continues, voice soft. “Ino, that moment we talked about?” He can see her swallow, and he nods, once. “I need you to do that now.”

He can sense Naruto look at him weirdly, but ignores him. 

Ino wrings her hands a bit. “What if there are side-effects? I’ve never actually…”

Kakashi smiles at her. “One step at a time.”

She nods, and then exhales, shifting her stance a bit. 

She licks her lips. “I need some… privacy.” She looks back at Sai. “Could you shield us?”

Sai blinks, and then takes out his scroll, conjuring birds that silently circle them, creating a dome that encompasses the eight of them. Kakashi shares a quick, relieved eye-smile with Gai. Minato seems calm, only watching them.

Ino looks at Kakashi, nodding at Naruto. “Is that the image I should push at them?”

Kakashi blinks, and then looks at Naruto. “No, actually I want him bound by the chains.” He grimaces. “Don’t we need Kurama?”

Naruto shakes his head. “He never fully leaves me, even if he may look like he does.” He grins, and then winks at Kakashi, leaning in to loudly whisper. “And he loves sunrises, lets give him that.” He grimaces a bit, in pretended panic. “Don’t tell him I told you though!”

Ino snickers, and then shifts again, reconcentrating. 

Naruto concentrates, and then the chains erupt, punching through reality and into Kyokuchi, and wrapping around him. 

Naruto grimaces. “Sorry.”

Kyokuchi just grunts.

 

Kakashi turns to step next to Ino.

 

There is a flicker, not unlike the beginning of the kamui opening, a flicker that could be dismissed as a hallucination, or a spec of dust, or a raindrop falling and catching the light.

 

Kakashi looks at it, watches it grow, against the white backdrop of the moving dome, and it’s almost hypnotic, in the way, the light bending and then twisting, and something other enters their vision, beyond, something that is definitely not… here.

 

A strange landscape, too organic and in weird colors, and the obviously artificial structures are all black and white in contrast, and there are huge ships hanging in the sky in the distance, and people milling about, weird people whose feet and appendages are dragging through the colorful clay, their snouts encased in iron, and organs enhanced with technology, and there’s white- and black-robed figures in the sky, pristine in their garments, and coldness in their black eyes.

 

Kakashi stares at it, and suddenly there is the sound of a gong, like before, right?, and it’s creepy, because all the movements in their view halts, and then… turns to the distortion of reality that ends in Ino’s eye. 

Everybody… everything looks at them. 

 

Time seems to pause.

 

Ino’s voice carries a shiver. “Uhhhhh, Rokudaime?”

Kakashi clears his throat, keeping his voice low. “Right. I mean, we do want them to look at us, right.” He quirks an eyebrow, and then nods at Naruto, who nods, too, and then gently pushes Kyokuchi into Ino’s field of vision.

 

For another long moment, nothing happens.

Kakashi refuses to fidget.

 

And then the big ships in the background start to move, sluggishly, getting bigger, just slowly, coming with a dull roar, a roar that goes through mark and bone.

Heading for them.

 

Kakashi swallows, his voice rough. “Close it. Let’s hope they got the message.”

Nothing happens.

 

Kakashi turns his head, slowly, to look at Ino.

Ino, whose eyes seem like saucers, and whose right eye is glowing, bright blue… underlaid with red.

It almost looks like a scar, down her cheek.

Kakashi shivers. 

He puts all the authority he has into his voice. “Ino! Close it!”

 

Ino’s eyes get impossibly bigger, as her breath grows short, and she is shaking, held up now by Sai, who hugs her from behind. 

Kyokuchi starts to snicker. 

Naruto growls at him, voice heated, shaking him a bit, the chains rattling. “What have you done?”

Kyokuchi lets his head fall back, to look up at Naruto. “Me? I did not open a wormhole for them.” More laughter, deep and satisfied. “They have obviously locked on from their side. You will not be able to close it.”

Kakashi squeezes his eyes shut for a moment, before opening them again, searching and locking his gaze with Minato. 

Minato nods. “I can. I can go through, and fl…”

Kakashi interjects, with a hiss. “No way. You’ve already used up most of the energy you got, look at your jaw?!”

Naruto’s head snaps round, his eyes yellow, and slitted. 

His voice is surprisingly small. “… Dad?”

Minato swallows, but he steps up to Naruto. “Naruto, you know we have to close it.” He looks up through the wormhole, watches the ships thunder close for a moment. “We managed one, with the advantage of surprise.” He shakes his head, gesticulating at the village. “And still houses are destroyed, some people likely dead.” He raises his hand, points at Kyokuchi. “I needed a lot of energy to use the seal on him, true…” He smiles, the smirk turning painful after a moment. “But Naruto, it needs to be done?” He shakes his head, looking imploringly at his son, who is just staring at him, quietly, and almost expressionless. 

Kakashi cannot breathe.

Minato presses his lips together. “My time is almost up now anyway. Let me do this.”

Naruto’s face crumbles, as the first tears fall. “I… there has to be another way?”

 

Kakashi’s voice is a croak, looking into the pale faces of the others that have gathered round. “Estimation?”

Itachi’s voice is very quiet. “30 seconds.”

 

30 seconds.

 

Kakashi feels as if the world is moving.

He knows if he allows this that Naruto will be hurt again, beyond measure. He knows Kushina will mourn, and Sora. He knows that he will hurt again.

 

I can… not.

 

25 seconds.

 

Minato smiles softly, and he looks at Kakashi for a moment, before his gaze returns to Naruto. “Your soul-mate is currently trying to find another way, but there is none. He cannot go through, I won’t allow it. Genma and Neji do not have the resources to get back, even if that might be possible.”

 

20 seconds.

 

Ino lets out a wail, a tortured, pitiful wail that settles terror in their hearts.

Sasuke’s voice is raw. “I could try?”

Kakashi doesn’t recognize his own voice. “Alone? Giving the enemy possible access to both rinnegan eyes?”

 

15 seconds.

 

Minato nods, reaching up to stroke his hand along Naruto’s cheek, along a whisker. 

He grins suddenly, a beatific, beautiful smile. “I love you.” He leans in, just a bit. “And you are worth defending.”

 

10 seconds.

 

A hand settles on Kakashi’s shoulder, Guy’s, whose tear-stricken face is very close. He’s held up by Mei, whose gaze is sympathetic, and resolved. He does not see pity in them, only knowledge.

Kage to kage. We know.

Kakashi reaches up, to cover Guy’s hand with his own.

 

5 seconds.

 

Minato steps back.

Guy’s hand drops from Kakashi’s shoulder.

Kakashi turns to face the wormhole.

 

The ships seem huge now, filling out the whole world on the other side, and it seems they cannot possibly pass through something as small as they have created, but Kakashi also knows that they will, something deep, deep in his animal hindbrain informing him of the danger coming, run, run, and don’t look back. 

 

Mei’s voice is wistful. “I guess we’ll need to find another waterfall.”

Kakashi blinks, as ice rushes down his spine.

 

Something green, and red, and glowing jumps through the portal, and right into first ship, and the explosion as it is ripped apart whips them off their feet, the gush of wind, and sound, and sheer force deafening. 

 

A sound that hurts, makes his teeth shatter.

Makes everyone blind.

 

A punch to the stomach, and Ino cries out again, and then another blow, and darkness.

 

 

 

 

Blessed darkness, for a while.  

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

He wakes up, knowing he is crying. 

 

He also knows that he is held by Minato, and Naruto.

 

He turns his face into a neck and weeps.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

“Senpai?”

 

Kakashi nods, trying for an eye-smile, but he knows it falls flat. He also knows he doesn’t need to hide his puffy red eyes from Tenzou. “Yes?”

Tenzou fidgets, and then nods towards the village. “The others have mostly left. Minato and the others are headed for the hospital.”

Kakashi nods, looking to the side for a moment, where Naruto is sitting close, eyes puffy and red as well. He smiles, bitter sweet, his voice a croak. “A life for a life, that’s how it is, often, isn’t it.” Naruto cackles, a vicious laugh, full of pain. He sniffs, nodding again. “Though, in this case, we’re having twins, so…” Another bout of pain, and he waits it out, tries to breathe, holding his arms crossed against his stomach. 

Tenzou reaches out hesitantly, to squeeze his shoulder. 

His voice is soft. “You know that if anyone can make it… he can.” He leans in, the big black eyes huge. “They can.”

Kakashi nods silently, with another sniff. “I know.” 

 

I know.

 

He clears his throat. “Is Ino alright?”

Tenzou nods. “Yes, after the wormhole closed amidst the explosions that threw us back she was able to close her eye again as well. Sakura says she will be fine.” He presses his lips together for a long moment, and then exhales. “I have brought Kyokuchi to the Anbu jails. He seems docile enough after the extraction, but…” 

Kakashi nods. “Yeah, you never know.” He shakes his head once, trying to concentrate. “Though we should probably debate putting him up with Kaguya. Or at least interrogate him with her present. I think she might be able to reach him where we cannot.”

Tenzou nods. “Good idea.”

He squeezes Kakashi’s shoulder again. “Go, Kakashi.” He turns his head. “And you, too, Naruto. Go and make the best of it.”

Naruto sniffs, and then angrily wipes his eyes, before he gets up with jerky movements, taking Kakashi’s hand. “You’re right.” He looks at Kakashi, the blue eyes ethereally bright. He works his jaw for a moment. “We have to.”

He tugs at Kakashi’s hand, and Kakashi lets himself be pulled along, through Konoha, towards the hospital. Where he knows their children are waiting for them.

And he is so giddy, and guilty, and sad, and so, so… happy.

 

It’s the best. 

And oh so terrible. 

 

 

 

 

And he feels like crying, again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 68: To live a life

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

 

Kaguya’s long white hair flows with the wind, her movements a glide, her whole face lighting up when a small bird settles on her outstretched fingers, before it flies off again.

 

Kakashi walks a step behind her, weirdly in need of her solemn indifference.

The day had been hectic, and the following night had been, too, and there had been tears, and hugs, and newborn-baby-smells, and first time changing diapers, and laughter, and another dead Otsotsuki at Kushina’s and Hanabi’s feet at the hospital, and Naruto had fallen asleep in the chair in the wee morning hours, next to Tenten, who hadn’t cared.

And their children, between them.

 

Kakashi had squeezed Minato’s shoulder, and hugged Kushina, and had gone to ask Kaguya for a walk.

 

He’s actually not sure why.

 

Though that is bullshit, of course.

 

He makes himself ask, before he can change his mind. “Is he alive?”

Kaguya looks up into the sky, her pale eyes kind. “Yes.”

Kakashi swallows, reaching up to wipe at his eyes. “Will he be alright?”

Kaguya smiles, her sharp little teeth glinting in the sun. “They will be, yes.”

Kakashi nods, sniffing. He quips, gently, though his throat feels like sandpaper. “Well, I was told that if someone can make it they can.”

Kaguya chuckles. “Yes.” She hesitates, and then looks at him, the red lips a smile. “And their children will shape their world.”

Pain again, and sorrow, and joy, and it hurts, and Kakashi sinks down, into a crouch, hiding his face behind his arms.

 

Kaguya laughs, like chimes in the wind. “Do not mourn him, Kakashi. He is where he is supposed to be.”

 

 

 

And he thinks: Yeah. 

 

If only it were that easy.

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

The crack in Minato’s jaw is big, and impossible to ignore… but it seems static, not widening.

Kushina had fussed over it, and had yelled a bit… but ultimately, she had just been glad.

 

Kakashi knows the feeling.

 

 

He’s sitting up high in the tree outside, on one of the branches, with Takara in his arm. She’s snoozing, after having been fed earlier. Her little head is still a bit unshapely, squeezed during birth. The skin is red, and botchy, the tiny fingernails still soft. She has downy hair, ashen, a mix between gray and gold, and her eyes had been blue when she’d blinked at him, earlier.

 

She’s the most beautiful being in the world.

 

Well, besides her brother.

 

Who is inside, being cooed at by Hinata and Naruto, who are having a field day with the sheer and utter glee Kushina exudes, because… he is a red-head. A dark red, true, but… and Kushina is freaking out about it. It’s really quite hilarious.

Kakashi grins to himself, watching the clouds pass beyond the leafs, his arm securely holding the swaddled baby against his chest. He’s stared at her for hours already. For now… for now it is enough to feel the chest expanding, hear the soft breath. 

The rapid beats of her heart, this little heart still, fast but healthy, and sure. 

 

There is a displacement of air above him, and the branch creaks, as two feet appear in his field of vision, feet clad in geta, and with white hair trailing down behind them.

 

Kakashi smiles softly to himself, addressing Jiraiya quietly. “So. Has Kushina quieted down?”

Jiraiya chuckles, and then the white hair shifts, as he shakes his head. “No, and I doubt she will.” He chuckles, and Kakashi chimes in, careful not to jostle the baby too much.

Jiriaya hums. “How are you feeling?”

Kakashi hesitates, his thumb brushing the cloth of the blanket she’s swaddled in, a ray of sun through the trees almost blinding him.

He nods, once. “Better. It’s…” Flash of memory, of Guy opening the gates behind the event horizon. Which gates did you open? How many? How… He closes his eyes, shakes his head, once. 

He inhales deeply, tone collected but brittle. “I had… accepted. I was already…” Already mourning Minato. Practiced pain. He swallows. “And now…”

Jiraiya hums, kicking his feet a bit. “You should kick that guilt in the butt now, Kakashi.” He hesitates, watching as Kakashi reopens his eyes, unseeing. “I mean it. Your friend gave you a great gift.”

The world wavers, as a tear drops from Kakashi’s eyes. “The biggest gift.”

Jiraiya nods. “And you’re holding the prize.”

Kakashi sniffs, and then nods. “I know.”

 

Jiraiya drops down off the branch, and onto Kakashi’s, crouching in front of him.

It always surprises Kakashi how fluent and graceful the big hulk of Jiraiya can be, and how silent.

Jiraiya smirks, nodding at Takara. “How does it feel?”

Kakashi looks down at her, and then shrugs, helplessly. “I… don’t know.” He blinks up, his voice cracking. “I feel…” He frowns, his eyes coming to search Jiraiya’s. “Full. I feel… full.”

Jiraiya snorts softly, and then nods, reaching out to ruffle Kakashi’s hair, the impertinent grin showing full well that he knows Kakashi cannot swat his hand away right now. “Good.”

 

Kakashi nods, and then grins, before sobering again, tone wobbly. “I just…”

Jiraiya tilts his head in silent inquiry. 

Kakashi shrugs, feeling a bit helpless as to how to express himself. “I… I feel like I’m done, somehow.”

Jiraiya frowns. “Done?”

Kakashi nods, and then lets his head fall back against the trunk, with a sigh. “Yeah, like… I’ve done everything I needed to do, and now…”

Jiraiya leans in a bit, dark eyes sparkling. Prompting. “You mean, this was what you had to do, still?”

Kakashi frowns, and then looks at him, searching his feelings. “I…” He trails off.

He tries to remember the feeling when he talked to his father, then.

His voice comes haltingly. “He… said that I should fulfill my destiny, with him… and that I should be happy.”

Jiraiya reaches out, to place a palm over Kakashi’s heart, the simple action surprisingly intimate and unmooring. 

He asks, with a sincerity that flays. “And are you?”

 

Kakashi blinks, and then looks down at Takara, who sighs in her sleep, a cute, little, heart-wrenching sigh. 

His voice is a whisper. “I will be.”

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

Naruto speaks up, his mouth full of ramen still, and dark shadows under his eyes. “You know I’ve been thinking…”

Sasuke interjects, tone dry. “Uh oh.”

Kakashi chuckles silently, reaching back to gently jostle the twin baby carriage, parked behind them in front of Ichiraku’s. Haruki quiets down again, with a small babbling sound.

Naruto rolls his eyes, totally ignoring Sasuke, while keeping addressing Sakura. “That seal you wear. You and Baa-chan…”

Sakura nods, reaching for her tea. “Yes?”

Naruto shrugs. “The way Kyokuchi commented on it. Have you talked to Baa-chan about this?”

Sakura nods, and then shrugs. “I have. But…” She shrugs again. “She only knows that the jutsu she based it on is a very old one. Supposedly it was used to store information on chakra-scrolls, too.”

Kakashi nods. “That would make sense. A data store, if you so will.” He looks at her. “By the way, any new powers?” 

Sakura shakes her head. “No, not that I am aware of.” She lightly pats her stomach. “But we’ll have to see if she does?”

Naruto lights up, with a huge smile. “She?”

Sakura blushes, just a bit. “Yeah, well….”

Sasuke leans in, with a loud whisper. “Didn’t you tell Itachi just this morning that he shouldn’t tell….?”

Sakura grumbles at him. “I told him that because he wanted to throw a party.” She shakes her head once. “Like…” She trails off, shaking her head again.

Kakashi chuckles to himself. “He’s just excited.” He swallows, sharing a look with Naruto, whose eyes sparkle at him. “I mean, who can blame him.” He raises his eyebrows. “The first Uchiha born in Konoha for decades.”

 

There is a small pause, and then Sasuke speaks up, tone surprisingly even. “A good beginning.”

Naruto’s head swivels round. “Oh?”

Sasuke groans. “No, not that.” He glowers at Naruto, but it’s playful, the corners of his eyes crinkling. “Maybe later.” He reaches for his own tea. “For now, Hanabi and I will travel a bit.” He clicks his tongue. “She wants to see all the world.”

Kakashi nods, watching him. “She’ll be a good ambassador.”

Sasuke looks at him, and then nods, with a small smile. “She will.”

 

Sakura sighs, a bit put on. “But, I mean, when you are gone…” She tilts her head, tone shifting into the dramatics. “Obito will be the only Uchiha around to teach her besides her dad?”

Kakashi grins, watching her. “Do you have doubts about his skills?”

Sakura snorts. “Not the slightest.” She sobers slowly, and then shrugs. “I just think that… given that there will be a certain… proximity in the future that there’s things to deal with still.” She weighs her head. “I mean, they have history.”

Sasuke exhales, and then shrugs, carefully. “We have history.”

Kakashi looks at him.

 

Sasuke’s purple eyes seem dark, and remote.

His voice comes haltingly. “Once, I dreamed about going back, in time, and change the course of it.” Sasuke’s eyes swivel to Naruto. “Like your Dad did.”

Kakashi frowns. “Actually Minato explicitly tried to…”

Sasuke interjects, tone calm. “The important word being tried here though, Kakashi.”

Kakashi frowns, watching him.

Sasuke smirks softly. “Minato went and told himself that he didn’t change the timeline, by letting it happen, but by not erasing his own memories, and applying the seals… he already did.”

Kakashi swallows, looking away. 

Sasuke continues, with a sigh. “Maybe it would have unfolded as it did, maybe it wouldn’t.” He shrugs. “But I cannot blame Minato, and this isn’t about what he did.” He clicks his tongue. “This is about the… fact that I would not wish to change this reality, now.” 

He hesitates, and then looks at them all, one after the other. “I would not wish to risk this. At all.”

 

Kakashi frowns, and then quips, lightly. “You might need to do those immersive history lessons though, at some point.” He clears his throat. “Though I think we are on a different path already with that, too, so… who knows.”

Naruto watches him, reaching for him through their bond, the warmth spreading.

Kakashi is grateful for it.

Naruto’s voice is soft. “We’re on a different path?”

Kakashi smirks softly, looking back at the baby carriage. “Takara is the one with the light hair and blue eyes. Though they both bear whiskers… there is no mistaking Kushina’s influence on Haruki. If Jiraiya remembered correctly… it should be the other way round.”

Naruto snorts. “True.” There’s a smile on his face now, a smile Kakashi covets, and that he has only seen when Naruto is looking at them. A smile that’s addictive.

Kakashi shrugs, tearing his gaze away from that smile with an effort. “But as Sasuke has said. I wouldn’t want to risk it either.”

 

Sasuke hums, staring into space, his tone wistful. “I hope the Sasuke who goes back in time with a light-haired boy is just as happy as I am.”

Kakashi blinks, averting his eyes. 

 

So am I.

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

Tenzou sighs, holding out another two scrolls for Kakashi. “And here, Senpai, the final reports. The village has been repaired, the debris cleared away. Ino is feeling better. The technology we found has been delivered to the research institute. We have put up Kyokuchi with Kaguya, as proposed, though they are now continuously guarded. Which, as I may add, doesn’t seem to phase her, but it does seem to annoy him.”

Kakashi shrugs, tone dry. “He’ll get used to it. There’s no way around it.”

 

Tenzou hesitates, and then grins, tone shifting. “So, how is life with newborns?”

Kakashi glowers at him, for effect. “Exhausting, as you know.” He snorts, and then ducks his head. “It’s awesome. And Minato and Kushina are there all the time to help, so it isn’t too bad. And Tenten is there, too, so…”

Tenzou nods. “Heard Hinata is going into labor, too?”

Kakashi nods, with a shrug. “Some first contractions. The doctors said it will take a bit, still.” He clicks his tongue. “Tenten is quite happy that she’s fit again to support her.” He grins. “And Naruto is vibrating again.”

They share a chuckle. 

 

Tenzou’s voice is very soft when he speaks again. “I also heard that Jiraiya has been to the hospital for check-ups a few times.”

Kakashi swallows, and then sighs, with a roll of his shoulders. “Yeah.” He sniffs. “Tsunade says it will take a bit still, but…”

Tenzou nods. “We have to make the best of what we’re given.”

 

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, eyes falling onto the new photo on his desk, the photo he shot of Naruto sleeping next to both babies. “We do.”

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

The bed dips, as Naruto crawls back into it, with a sigh.

 

He crawls up Kakashi’s body, a grin on his lips. “Mom and Dad are out for a walk with the kids…” He leans in, pulls at the mask with his teeth. “We have an hour.” He waggles his eyebrows.

Kakashi grunts, still sleepy, reaching for him, even though he makes his voice sound grumpy. “I am so tired?”

Naruto hums, coming up to kiss him. “Whatever could we do about that?”

Kakashi pouts when they separate. “No idea?”

Naruto grins. “I wanna try something.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, lifting a hand to push at the strands of golden hair falling into Naruto’s eyes. “Oh?”

Naruto nods. “Yes. I want to suck you off, real quickly, and then take my time with you while you’re spent… in the oversensitivity.” 

Kakashi swallows, parts of him liking that idea, very much. “I see.”

Naruto looks down between them. “I see you’re up for the idea.”

Kakashi snorts, wondering at having given up at being embarrassed. “Obviously?” He clicks his tongue, wriggling his hips a bit. “Well?”

 

Naruto laughs, gutturally, and then moves down, pulling off Kakashi’s pyjama pants unceremoniously, eyeing his prize. “I see you really like the idea.”

Kakashi reaches down to give himself a stroke, watching Naruto’s pupils dilate. “What can I say… “ He bites his lips, watching Naruto watch him. “Well?”

Naruto smiles ferally, and then bends down, to swallow him down, without much ado.

Heat, and slickness, and pressure, and Kakashi grunts, eyes rolling up a bit. 

There is no finesse now, only depth, and perfection, knowledge and skill torturously brilliantly employed. 

Naruto’s mouth is a furnace, fanning the flames, without mercy. 

It doesn’t take long.

 

Kakashi’s orgasm rushes up, just as Naruto reaches for him, and he convulses, almost painfully, coming in big heaves down that throat, in a white-out of his senses, taking all thought, and breath.

 

He comes back to himself, on his stomach, and Naruto pressing in.

 

No fingers, this time, no tongue. 

Just experience, and the utter relaxation of the orgasm.

 

It feels like an arm going up Kakashi’s throat.

 

There is no pain, just gliding pressure, and the knowledge of his body. It opens under Naruto, like a sigh, Naruto, who is straddling Kakashi’s thighs, hands pushed onto the back of Kakashi’s shoulders. 

 

A shallow rhythm, this one. 

It’s not one that would bring Kakashi off, normally.

But then it’s neither meant to be. Nor is it meant to bring him off.

 

This… this is for Naruto.

And Kakashi revels in it.

 

His mind is totally empty, all senses reduced to the pressure holding him down, and the one gliding into him, again and again.

His breath is forced from his lungs with it, a curious sensation as Naruto obviously works his breathing for him. He feels huge, and all-encompassing, and Kakashi can feel every inch of him, hyperaware of the brushes of coarse hair when breath is pushed from him, and the touch of cold air as it is pulled back into his lungs.

And he feels empty, wanting to scream with the need to be filled, but he cannot, because it is not his breath, not now.

 

Naruto does take his time. 

 

Pressure turns to slickness, the soft squelching sounds positively debased.

Kakashi’s fingers are cramped into the duvet, eyes closed.

It’s tranquil.

 

When Naruto comes it is with a gasp, and a push, all the way up through Kakashi, and to his heart. Which stumbles, in sync with Naruto’s. 

 

Kakashi reaches back as Naruto grows soft, his voice scratchy. “No. Stay.”

Naruto hums, pressing a kiss to Kakashi’s sweaty neck. 

He rummages around somewhere off to the side, and then pulls out, and the emptiness is terrible, for a moment. 

Naruto mumbles something, and then pushes something into him, something hard, and big, and unforgiving. Something that closes off the emptiness.

Kakashi swallows, eyelids fluttering. “What…”

Naruto slides back up, takes him into his arms, spooning him. “I plugged you.” He leans in, licking along the shell of Kakashi’s earlobe. “That way you’re all slick and wet for me later.”

Kakashi shudders, feeling the hard thing within him shift, with a little jolt of pleasure. “I’m not sure I can wear that at work, Naruto.”

Naruto nips at his neck. “I am.”

Kakashi swallows, with a shiver. 

Naruto snickers. “Besides. You need to set a precedent for me, later.”

 

Kakashi snorts. And then lifts his head to look back at Naruto as best as he can, a tease heavy in his voice. “Now that I’m rejuvenated though, what makes you think I’ll leave the hat to you?”

Naruto gasps in mock outrage, and then tickles, him, until they’re both rolling in bed, wrestling. 

Kakashi is aware that Naruto lets him win, but he takes it, staring down into the face he loves so much. 

He grins. “Though you could convince me, of course.”

Naruto bites his lips, leaning up a bit. “Oh?” 

Kakashi nods, seemingly needing to think about it. “Yeah, well, I mean, you c…”

 

 

Minato’s voice from the other room interrupts them, loudly and cheerfully announcing their presence, though there’s also humor in his voice. “You could make us some breakfast and feed your children!”

Naruto rolls his eyes, and then hollers back, with laughter. “Just a sec, Dad!” He turns back, to point a finger at Kakashi’s chest. “I’ll be by at lunch for a quick one.”

Kakashi swallows, body cramping around the plug for a moment. “Alright.”

 

They share a look, and then Kakashi pushes up, with a sigh, holding out his hand. “Shower?”

Naruto takes the proffered hand, with a shit-eating grin. “Definitely.”

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

Kakashi grins down at Haruki, watches the sleepy eyes blink back. Over on the other side of the table Kushina is cooing at Takara, playing with her little feet. 

Minato and Naruto are deep in a discussion about… wall color.

 

It’s bizarre.

 

Naruto’s hands are flying. “Look Dad, there is no way that orange is making aggressive in any way? Look at me, I’m wearing orange all the time?”

Minato’s voice is exasperated by now. “Wearing the colors, and having them as wall color are very different things, Naruto.”

Naruto glowers. “But blue is better?”

Minato shrugs. “It’s a more neutral color?”

Naruto crosses his arms. “Which you keep on wearing.”

Minato pinches the bridge of his nose. “That is not…”

Kushina chuckles, under her breath, while kissing little fingers.

There is a pout now in Naruto’s voice. “You just don’t like my signature color.”

 

Minato’s head turns to Kakashi, with a pleading look. “Kakashi, say something.”

Kakashi laughs at him. “Oh no, no way, you two hash that out.” No way. “I’m sure you’ll find the perfect color to paint the children’s room’s walls with.”

Minato glowers at him, and then turns back to Naruto, with a sigh. “Naruto, the only way you’re so set on orange is because of Kurama’s cha…”

Naruto interjects, heatedly. “Yeah, so, what of it? It’s a beautiful color?” His face pinches. “You weren’t there to wear blue in front of me, so…” He trails off, looking away in the sudden silence, with a swallow.

Minato lifts his eyebrows for a moment, and then reaches out, very slowly. “I know.”

Naruto swallows again, the click audible. 

His voice is a whisper. “I’m sorry, I…”

Minato squeezes Naruto’s hand, with a shake of his head. “No, don’t be.” He exhales. “It’s the truth.” He squeezes again, voice calm but sad. “And Naruto… I won’t be there when they are old enough to remember me either…”

Naruto’s face crumbles, and tears fall, glinting in the morning sun. 

Kakashi cannot breathe suddenly. 

 

Naruto’s voice is wobbly. “Blue walls then. With orange posters and suns, and red foxes?” He looks over to his mom, who watches surprisingly solemnly. “Would you like that?”

Kushina smirks, just gently. “I would.”

 

Kakashi reaches out, touches the reddish down of Haruki’s hair with his fingertips.

 

I would, too.

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

“You… want to open the Uchiha complex to other clans?”

 

Itachi shrugs. “It’s wasted space and bad memory.” He looks over at Obito, who gazes back rather solemnly. Itachi clears his throat. “Given developments and even with the three surviving Uchiha back in one village…”

Obito interjects, calmly, but resolved. “There’s no way we’ll be able to rebuild it, and populate it again. I made sure of that, then.” He swallows, and then inclines his head, to Itachi. “Even if he and Sakura had ten kids, and Iruka and I found mothers for 10 of our own… and even if Sasuke and Hanabi…” He trails off.

Kakashi sighs, and then nods, watching both men sit next to each other somewhat stiffly. 

He clicks his tongue. “Difficult subject.”

 

Itachi smirks, a bit painfully. “Usually… we ignore it, for the sake of the future.”

Obito shifts, clearing his throat.

Kakashi nods. “I bet.” He leans forward, elbows on the desk, steepling his fingers. “So, did you have a specific clan in mind…?”

Itachi shakes his head. “No. But this village will grow, and it should not only grow in the outskirts. Making big parts of the Uchiha territory available again would help with that.”

Kakashi nods, watching him. “You don’t just want to offer houses, you want to offer the land.”

Itachi sighs, sharing a quick look with Obito. “We want to tear down the gates, and a lot of the houses. Rebuild them for those that wish to live there. And the shortcut to the river should never be closed again.”

Kakashi nods, watching him. “A good idea.” 

Itachi presses his lips together for a moment. “Sasuke was against it, but then he remembers the complex with the rose-colored glasses of youth only. My memories are different.” He looks at Obito, who is gazing down at his hands. “As are Obito’s.” Itachi clicks his tongue. “Though I… wished that it were differently I welcome the possibility for change now.”

 

Kakashi looks at him, for a long moment, something clicking into place. “Sasuke told you he wouldn’t try to change the past.” You talked about it.

Itachi smirks, a bit painfully. “He has. And… Our past shapes us.” He swallows. “What we have now is more important.”

Obito swallows, too. 

He fidgets a bit, before speaking. “It has not been easy. The guilt is debilitating, at times. The only thing that makes me breathe is Iruka.” He smirks a bit painfully, at Kakashi. “And you, but…”

Kakashi snorts, nodding once.

Obito continues, with a big sigh. “This will be a visible new beginning.” He looks at Itachi. “With a new Uchiha baby girl, very soon.”

Itachi ducks his head, just a bit, while a blush spreads.

Kakashi grins. 

 

He claps his hands, softly. “Alright then. It’s your complex, rebuild it. I’ll free a budget to help with the tearing down and broadening the street.”

Itachi nods. “Much appreciated.” He pushes a strand of black hair back, with a bit of a sheepish grin. “I may have already warned the council.”

Kakashi quirks an eyebrow, vaguely amused. “Oh?”

Itachi pulls a face. “Yes, you know how it is… proposals have to be turned in months before the vote, and they have to be discussed, and there’s a lot of opinions, and…” He trails off.

Kakashi grunts. “Have I told you lately how happy I am that you handle them.”

Itachi snorts, playful sorrow in his voice. “Nope.”

 

Kakashi leans forward, eyes sparkling, carefully not moving too much. “Well, I am.” He nods vigorously. “Because if I had to deal with them on a daily basis we wouldn’t have a council anymore.”

Obito cackles. 

 

Kakashi’s tattoo tickles, and he sobers, heat spreading through his core. “I’m sorry, I will now have to dismiss you now.”

Obito narrows his eyes, obviously guessing correctly. “Date?”

Kakashi refuses to blush. “Maybe?”

Obito grins, salaciously. “Have fun!”

Kakashi glowers at him.

 

Itachi stands up, obviously trying to contain his mirth. “Senpai.”

Kakashi nods, and watches him go, and then nods at the door, while his eyes stay on Obito. “Out!”

Obito chortles, and is gone, and Kakashi shifts in his seat, deliberately, gasping when the plug shifts with the movement. 

 

He carefully pushes the scrolls on the desk away, and then waits, knowing this will be so good.

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

Naruto watches him read, propped up on one elbow, bathed in the soft light of the lamp.

 

The door to the nursery is open, the soft breathing of the twins just audible, a soft sound that they both find soothing. 

Naruto speaks softly, as not to wake them. “So, how do you like the scene in the last chapter.”

Kakashi hums, turning a page slowly. “The one with the ice-cream or the one with the candle.”

Naruto sighs, a bit dreamily. “Ice-cream.”

Kakashi shoots him a look, knowing full well they’re not really talking about food. “We just had dinner, and fruit as dessert. You’re insatiable.”

Naruto rolls onto his stomach, with a pout. “And you are starving me.”

Kakashi snorts, putting the book away. “Really. Letting you fuck me over the desk in a truly spectacular fashion I might add is… starving.”

Naruto blinks at him, with a roll of his hips. “Well, you haven’t returned the favor?”

Kakashi shakes his head, opening his mouth to retort, when a little wail sounds, Takara obviously awake again.

Naruto sighs, deeply. “It’s my turn, isn’t it.”

Kakashi grins, picking the book back up. “Absolutely.” He keeps his eyes on the book as Naruto pushes up, with a grumble. 

He licks his lips. “If you’re good I’ll reward you later.”

 

Naruto flips him the bird.

 

 

 

 

But he moans very prettily into Kakashi’s hand over his mouth later nonetheless.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 69: At the end of the road

Notes:

The last full chapter, next is "just" the epilogue.

There’s some time jumps in here, just little hints of time passing. :)
And... there's wonderful art by Sanxkei, and Kokodrawings (who outdid themselves!) in this one....

One last dance, my friends. *hugs*

Chapter Text

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jiraiya dies, on a beautiful summer day, laying in the shade of the tree next to the lake with the waterfall, just outside Konoha.

 

Tsunade tells Kakashi, her big eyes containing a weird light.

Somewhere, deep in Kakashi’s guts, he knows what it means.

 

She hugs him, before she leaves, and then she’s leaves, to go to him.

With him.

 

 

And the pain is sharp, and vicious and… it is beautiful. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

Naruto puts a cap onto Haruki’s head, but addresses Kakashi. “There’s a new boy at the playground.” He looks up. “Small, wearing a mask, and headband across his left eye.” His eyes narrow playfully. “Anything you wanna tell me?”

Kakashi snorts, zipping up Takara’s jacket. “That must be Houki. Remember the warden’s child?”

Naruto blinks, and then nods. “Ahhhh, see, I knew there was something about him.” He grins at Kakashi. “Looks like she was sufficiently impressed with you.”

Kakashi hums, watching him. “You’re not jealous?”

Naruto lightly clicks his tongue, leaning in so the kids cannot hear, his voice dark, but also filled with humor. “Darling, you betray me Kurama will eat you alive…”

Kakashi grunts, a dark twist in his guts. “Noted.”

Naruto grins, biting his lips, before addressing the boy in front of him. “Alright! Who wants to go on a little trip with gramps and grandma?”

Both Haruki and Takara jump up and down, throwing their arms into the air. “Me, me, me, me, meeeee!”

Kakashi chuckles, reaching for the backpacks. “You will have a great day today, okay? Be good, and have fun.” He leans in to give them both a kiss. “And don’t eat all the sweets they bring along, ok?”

Takara blinks up at him, eyes huge, the little voice swallowing some syllables. “Cn… Kuma com?”

Kakashi blinks, and then looks up at Naruto, who is squeezing Haruki in an embrace right now. “I’m not sure, honey, we can ask?” Naruto blinks down at him, and Kakashi makes a show of asking. “So we were wondering if Kurama would like to go on the trip with them?” He winks.

Naruto weighs his head, and then grins, bumping his nose with the boy’s. “What do you think?”

Haruki nods, vigorously, whispering loudly. “Kurma’s bored all th’ time.”

Kakashi snorts, suppressing laughter, while Naruto’s shoulders shake. 

He shakes his head once, but not in negation. “You might be right about that, honey.”

 

Naruto puts Haruki down, and then red bubbles from his stomach, solidifying into a cat-sized Kurama. 

Whose red eyes are vaguely annoyed, as usual. “I AM NOT BORED.”

Kakashi hums, hiding his grin. “Of course not.”

 

There’s a knock on the door, and then Kushina pushes in, vibrant as always. Kakashi swallows when he sees that the lines are more pronounced now, the gaps in the skin obvious, though not as bad as Minato’s are. 

Soon now, very soon.

He forces a smile.

 

Kushina claps her hands, excitedly, bending down to hug the kids. “Ohhh, are we having an escort today?”

Kurama swishes his tails. “MAYBE?”

Naruto rolls his eyes, extending an arm to pull Minato into a half-embrace when he steps in. “Hi Dad.”

Minato returns the embrace for a long second, eyes closing, hiding the almost dark once more eyeballs. “Hey.” He looks at Kushina and the kids. “Ready?”

Kakashi nods. “Where are you going?”

Kushina looks up at him. “We wanted to go by Jiraiya’s memorial. It’s a beautiful spot for a picnic.”

Kakashi swallows, nodding at her. “Good idea.”

Minato indicates the bag he’s carrying. “We got flowers, too. I’m glad that Tsunade asked to join him there.”

Naruto ducks his head for a moment, and then nods, searching Minato’s eyes for a long moment. “Yeah, it’s good to know where to go.”

Minato smiles, the cracks on his face looking scary for a moment, and Kakashi is vaguely glad that their kids have grown up with it, taking it as totally normal. “Well, you know where to go when the time comes.”

Kakashi frowns, watching them, pulled from his reverie when Kurama’s swishing tails touch his hand.

He looks down.

Kurama’s eyes see too much. “THEY’LL BE BACK BY NIGHTFALL.”

 

No matter what happens, he means.

 

Kakashi nods, and then pastes a smile on. “Have fun!”

Minato’s once more yellow eyes catch his, for a moment.

 

He nods.

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

The autumn wind carries Minato’s ashes away, and his smile.

 

The pain is a vibrant, burning color, and acid in Kakashi’s throat.

 

 

Kushina hugs Kakashi, until it fades, into something bearable. 

 

Sanxkei - Kushina hugs Kakashi

 

 

Naruto is up on Minato’s stone head, a flame, in the night.

 

Their tattoos burn, the only thing teetering them to the ground.

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kushina’s eyes are yellow now, too. 

 

Kakashi tries to ignore it.

 

It’s spring again, late spring, the cherry blossoms all gone again, fragile and beautiful, and the days are warm again. 

Shikamaru is there, having taken to play with her from time to time.

 

She thoughtfully pushes a piece forward on the shogi board, but addresses Kakashi. “I’ve been thinking.”

Kakashi smirks gently, suppressing the urge to say ‘uh oh’, mind full of memories when he did. “Yes?”

Kushina shoots him a look. “That boy, Houki… he’s like you.”

Shikamaru looks at her, before looking back at the board.

 

Kakashi lowers the book he was pretending to read, the commotion of their kids, and Tenten’s and Hinata’s kids, and Sakura’s daughter, as well als Temari’s son playing together with the parents much too loud to read. “And?”

Kushina shrugs. “He would be worthy to receive your clan name.”

Kakashi blinks, staring at her. He cannot think. 

 

Shikamaru speaks up, tone flat. “I agree. Gaara has adopted a small boy as well. He will raise him as his own. Though not quite the same the legacies we shape are just as important as our bonds, and our children.”

Kakashi blinks, and then stares at him. 

He exhales, and then smirks. “I’m happy for Gaara.”

Shikamaru smirks, just a bit, before pushing a piece forward. “So am I. I heard that Houki is a genius. A worthy recipient of the name Hatake.”

Kakashi blinks, looking out onto the yard, watching Naruto twirl Takara in his arms. “I’ll have to discuss it with Naruto.”

Kushina smirks, pushing a piece forward. “You do that.” She looks up at Shikamaru with an impertinent grin. “Check.”

 

Shikamaru curses. Loudly.

Kakashi snorts. “Language…”

Shikamaru grumbles, under his breath.

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

Iruka sighs, shuffling through the folders. “That boy, Metal Lee… he’s a bit older than the other kids, but his confidence is a mess.” He looks up, the big dark eyes sorrowful. “I’m actually a bit surprised, I thought Rock Lee would be a natural, but he seems a bit…”

 

Kakashi swallows, looking out the window for a moment. “Rock Lee depended on Guy a lot. They were so close. When Guy left with Mei… the gap was just too great.” He grimaces. “It was such a hectic time. I didn’t quite notice. It’s my fault, I…” 

Iruka sighs, and shakes his head, interjecting slowly. “It’s not your fault. All of us should have noticed.” He rubs a hand over his face. “I’m pushing him back until the others are ready.”

Kakashi nods once, and then grunts, needing to ask. “Think it’s really wise to put them all into one class at the academy next year?”

Iruka snorts, addressing him rather drily. “Think it is a good idea to put them into separate classes??”

Kakashi snorts. “True. They’re way too close.”

Iruka nods, with eyes wide. “They’re a menace.”

Kakashi clears his throat.

Iruka points a finger. “Already, I might add. I mean Naruto was bad, but Takara, Haruki, Sarada, Himawari, Teshi and Shikadai are a class of their own. And they’ve loosely hooked up with Choji’s daughter, too, Chocho.” He lifts his hands a bit. “Actually, only Houki missing.” 

Kakashi hums. “I heard he likes to play with Denki, and Akio, Tenzou’s son.”

Iruka nods. “And Inojin. I think that group has formed mostly because of Sai and Tenzou being Anbu, or former Anbu.” He sighs again, shaking his head. “Still. Next year will be hell in a hand basket, I just know.”

 

Kakashi nods slowly, and then presses his lips together.

Iruka looks at him, with narrowed eyes. “What.”

Kakashi tries. “Nothing?”

Iruka leans back, with a sigh. “Oh god, no, what.”

Kakashi ducks his head a bit. “Takara has learned kage bunshin. And Kushina and Haruki are practicing the chains.”

Iruka stares at him, and then just lifts his eyebrows, with another big sigh. “Well, they’d have to beat your one year at the academy.”

Kakashi snorts. “Yeah, well, let’s not do that again.”

Iruka looks up at him. “No?”

Kakashi shakes his head. “No. Not good for making friends.”

Iruka smirks softly. “And we’re not at war. We have time.”

Kakashi inhales deeply, and then nods, just utterly relieved. “Yes.”

 

He hesitates a moment, and then nods at Iruka. “What about your plans in regards to children.”

Iruka blushes, and looks away for a moment. 

His voice is soft. “Well, we found someone to help us.”

Kakashi leans forward a bit. “Oh?”

Iruka swallows. “Yeah.” He licks his lips. “We’re gonna do one try. Either it’ll work, or not, we’re both in agreement that we’re too old to try for another 20 years.” He shrugs. “So. We’ll see.”

Kakashi watches him, and then nods, with a small smile. “Crossing my fingers.”

Iruka smiles at him, gratefully. “Thank you.”

 

Kakashi smirks, trying to imagine and failing. 

He snorts. “Well. If you manage, I’ll help with the sharingan.” Iruka looks at him, and Kakashi waggles his shoulders a bit, in an exaggerated way. “I’m the only one awakening them in a positive way?”

Iruka snorts, and then nods, with a faint blush. Obviously remembering how. “True.” He nods at Kakashi. “By the way, how is Sora?”

Kakashi leans back, with a sigh. “Spending a lot of time with Kushina.” He hesitates. “I can see her… leave with her, you know?”

Iruka nods again. “Yeah.”

 

Kakashi shares a small smile with him, and then looks out of the window, Iruka’s presence easy, and a balm for his soul. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

******

 

 

 

 

 

 

He finds Sora later, high up on the Hokage heads, there, where Naruto used to go, and still goes, even more so now, after.

 

She looks up at him, with a little smile, her feet dangling down over the edge of the granite tufts of hair. 

He returns the smile, and then complains, half in jest, half serious. “Why does no-one ever sit on my head.”

Sora snickers, and then waves her hand, looking at the other heads for a moment, before giving a shrug. “I think it’s because you can hide in the tufts here. I mean, you have tufts of hair as well, and Tobirama does, too, but…” She shrugs again. “I also think it’s tradition by now.” She hesitates, and then indicates the space between two of the tufts. “And of course, there’s this now.” 

Kakashi nods, looking back at the small space, where Naruto has placed a blue sweater, and a candle. “That’s why she’s often here, too, I bet.”

Sora hums, and then sighs, looking back out over Konoha. “It’s not long now.”

Kakashi swallows, and shakes his head. “No.”

Sora exhales, in a rush. “Hachō-mura is waiting for me.”

 

Kakashi looks at her for a moment, feeling vaguely relieved. “I’m glad.”

Sora shoots him a sly look. “You thought I’d follow them.”

Kakashi snorts, and then shrugs. “Yeah, well, I mean Jiraiya, and Minato, and…” He trails off. 

Sora smirks, but her eyes are alight, almost burning amber in the light. “I’ll go there soon enough Kakashi. The world has turned out to be so interesting, despite the… losses. But we knew those losses would come.”

Kakashi nods. “And we got some extra time.”

Sora elbows him lightly. “Lots of extra time for you and Naruto if rumors are to be trusted.”

Kakashi snorts, and then laughs under his breath, trying to contain the blush. “Yeah, well.”

Sora grins, and then sighs through her nose, lifting her face into the breeze. “I heard from Iruka that the kids are something else already.”

Kakashi smirks a bit proudly, and then shrugs. “They are wild already, I give you that. Running around in their friends group all day if we let them. Worse than Naruto was.”

Sora grins into the heavens, her teeth flashing. “Let them. Unlike Naruto, they are not alone, and the bonds that are formed right now might surpass the soul-bonds, who knows.” She winks at him. “As unbelievable as that may be.”

Kakashi hums, but stays quiet, looking down at Konoha, bathed in the low autumn evening sun.

 

Sora leans into him, a bit. “You should give him the hat while she’s still here.”

Kakashi clicks his tongue. “I’ve been thinking about it.”

Sora shoots him a look. “He’s older than Minato was now… and much wiser.”

Kakashi shushes her, with an exaggerated panicked look. “Shhhhh, don’t let him hear that?!”

Sora snickers, and Kakashi joins in, feeling some of the tension he had prior to this meeting leave his body. 

He sobers slowly. “Maybe it would fit well with New Years?” He exhales, shooting Sora a look. “If… you know…”

Sora nods. “I think that should fit.”

 

Kakashi exhales, and nods.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

Another year gone, another celebration.

 

The living room is a mess, with so many kids running round, playing loudly. It’s a cacophony of voices, and laughter, and the music someone turned on. 

The food is all over the table, every semblance of decorum long gone.

 

It’s not something Kakashi would have chosen, years ago.

 

No, by now this is what he needs, in regular intervals, because he usually ends up laughing so much the muscles in his face hurt. 

And Hinata is a riot when drunk, totally losing her usual reserved temper, and singing loudly karaoke with Neji. 

And Naruto, if they’re unlucky.

 

Kushina’s skin is ashen now, but she’s laughing, loudly, having a drink with Kurenai, who looks flushed and happy. There’s been rumors about her dating someone, but that someone was kept under tight wraps by her and that is more than fine with Kakashi. 

Because it’s obvious she is happy.

 

He looks up when Mirai steps up to him suddenly, her little face utterly serious.

She fidgets a bit, before addressing him. “Rokudaime, I hereby offer my services as babysitter to you.”

Kakashi turns to her, and looks at her for a moment, vaguely amused. 

He nods at the wild horde of kids, running around. “That is a very nice offer, Mirai. However, I don’t believe they’re babies anymore…” He hesitates, tilting his head. “Why do you come to offer this now?”

Mirai fidgets a bit, the large red eyes flitting away for a moment. “I… Mom told me that Dad graduated the academy at my age…”

Kakashi nods, remembering. 

He prompts. “And, so?”

Mirai sighs a bit. “And I have no experience in leading? I want to become a great leader like my Dad was… everyone says so. Aunt Ino always talks like he knew everything, and Uncle Choji always makes me laugh with the jokes he used to tell, and Uncle Shikamaru says Dad was the only one to outwit him, and I…” She trails off.

Kakashi purses his lips, mock annoyed. “Hmmm, the only one to outwit him, huh?”

Mirai’s eyes come up a bit panicked, and he laughs, reaching out to hold her gently by her arm. “Easy. He was. But these kind of things come through experience, Mirai, not by running after…” He hesitates, looking over her shoulder with a bit of a sigh at their twins jumping over the couch. “…them.”

Mirai’s eyes flit to the couch, and then back. 

She ducks her head. “I see.”

 

Kakashi watches her. “You are only nine, Mirai. Don’t grow up so fast.”

Mirai’s eyes come up to his. “But you were even younger, and everybody agrees that you are one of the greatest shinobis, and I want to be that too, when I’m older…” She blushes, trailing off. 

Kakashi smirks gently, the pang in his gut thankfully only gentle. “There was nothing else for me when I was young, and we were at war, Mirai. You have friends, and family.” His eyes flit to Obito, who is sitting in a corner with Iruka, obviously a bit tipsy, and apparently laughing his ass off at something Naruto just said. Naruto, who is gesticulating wildly, the drink in his glass threatening to spill over. 

He clicks his tongue. “Actually that is not true. There were people for me when I was young.” He swallows, with a frown, his eyes returning to her. “But my mind was so narrowed on my goal through the pain…” He shakes his head. “Don’t let that happen to you. Go and play, and go see movies with your friends. Live.” He leans forward, searching her eyes. “The world will still be there, when you’re grown up.” He lifts his eyebrows. “And I know you will be an astonishing kunoichi.”

Mirai ducks her head again, but this time with a faint blush.

She gives him a small smile, and is off again, swallowed up by the party.

 

Kakashi watches the people he loves for a long moment, eyes unfocused and drifting, reminiscing. 

 

His mind drifts to Guy, and Mei, somewhere.

To their child.

 

Did they have it? Did all go well? How do they live there now?

He sighs, with a roll of his shoulders.

 

There had been no contact anymore, since then.

Kaguya says it is unlikely that there will be.

Never ever before has their world been invaded, the Otsotsuki are likely shellshocked, no matter what exactly Guy and Mei might have done. 

 

Still.

 

A part of Kakashi wishes fervently that there had been contact.

 

 

Kushina’s hand settles on his shoulder, draws him back out of his thoughts.

She grins at him. “Where are you at?”

He smirks a bit painfully, watching her settle next to him. “Just thinking about Guy and Mei… watching our kids run around here… I just hope they have a family for themselves now, too. And friends. And…” He hesitates, not wanting to call it security, searching for a better way to express himself for a long moment. “… a life.”

Kushina hums, throwing her head a bit, to shift her hair out of her face. “I’ve seen them both in action on the battlefield back then, and I have met them several times… they will be alright.” She bumps into him lightly, with her shoulder. “Are alright.”

He nods, ducking his head, and then looks up at her. “What about you?”

She sighs, quirking an eyebrow. “Very soon now.”

He nods, watching her. “How soon.”

She bites her lips, the teeth glinting. “Ahhh, Kakashi, you know, don’t you…” She tilts her head, sending him a look. “You can feel it.”

He swallows, and then sighs, shudderingly. “I want you to give him the hat.” He swallows again, locking their gazes. “Tonight.”

Kushina reaches up, her fingers ghosting over left Kakashi’s temple. “Are you sure?”

Kakashi smirks a bit painfully. “You tell me.”

 

She chuckles, and reaches up to push a strand of hair behind her own ear, tucking it in. 

She shrugs, sounding wistful. “I look forward to sit down with your father, Kakashi. And to see Minato there, this time.” She sniffs, her dark eyes bright with tears. “Oh, can you imagine, I bet they will wait for me there, at that fire.”

Kakashi nods, his own eyes filling with tears also. “They better.”

She grins, a bit wobbly. “It’ll be fun, I tell you. With Jiraiya there and Tsunade…” 

Kakashi chortles, though he blinks rapidly now, to keep the tears at bay. “Yeah.” He groans. “Oh god, Jiraiya and my Dad?! I bet he tells him stuff? I’ll never hear the end of it.”

Kushina laughs out loud, waving others off when they look over, and then leans forward, her eyes twinkling, her voice a loud whisper. “Ohhhhh, I better hurry up then, that is a story I want to hear as well?”

Kakashi groans again, hiding his face behind his hand for a moment, before dropping it and reaching for her hand. 

She links their fingers, and grins, and then sobers just a bit, letting her gaze drift over the assembled guests, their friends, and family. The children. 

She squeezes his hand once. “Should I say goodbye?”

He shakes his head, tone raw. “No. No, don’t do that. They’ll know soon enough and I think… I think Naruto deserves those moments alone with you?” He sniffs. “The hat is in the box in the hallway. Just take Naruto and…”

She nods, squeezing his hand once more tightly. “I think we did good, Kakashi.”

He snorts, his thumb stroking her skin, voice wobbly. “I’ll miss you.”

She leans in, pressing a kiss to his temple. “I know. I’ll miss you, too.”

 

And then she’s gone, up and over to Naruto, laughing, and across the room Sora’s eyes find his, and it is pain, pain, beautiful pain, and terrible, too.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

He watches Haruki and Takara sleep, half fallen over each other and snoring, utterly done from the party and food.

 

It’s peaceful now, in the wee morning hours, in their home that looks just wrecked. 

That had emptied out, a while back.

 

People had wondered where Naruto was, but had readily accepted that he was out with Kushina. 

Aside from Kakashi and the kids… who else would he be with on this night?

 

Takara twitches in her sleep, sighing loudly. Haruki mumbles something, under his breath. 

They are too cute, in Kakashi’s admittedly biased opinion.

 

He closes the door quietly, after a few minutes, walking over into the dark bedroom, silently getting changed. He leaves the lights off while brushing his teeth, using the sharingan instead, the world in stark contrast. 

He doesn’t look at himself in the mirror. 

 

And then… he lies down in the cold bed and places his hand onto Naruto’s empty side, reaching, and the pulse comes, the warmth, the feeling… and then it is gone again, closed off, and Kakashi’s hand closes to a fist.

A single tear drops down, silently. 

 

 

And then he inhales, deeply.

 

And resigns himself to sleep.

 

 

 

 

 

*******

 

 

 

 

 

He drops off Takara and Haruki at their half-sibling’s home, Tenten and Hinata looking mightily tired still but glad to see him, trying their best to make him stay for breakfast but he refuses, citing an upset stomach. 

 

Hinata’s large lilac eyes seem to look right through him, and he pastes an eye-smile on, before kissing the kids goodbye, Tenten giving him a hug, carefully making sure the white coat he carries gets no creases.

 

 

The village is peaceful today, doused in warm sunlight. 

Still sleeping, mostly. 

 

Some scents of fresh bread, and coffee. Kakashi’s thoughts fly back to that bakery and the hokkaido rolls he had, when he got the cake. There’s a smile on his face at the thought, and an even broader grin when he remembers how tousled Sasuke’s hair had been when he had greeted him outside that tent. Such a weird thing, that this comes with nothing but love now, nothing but… good. 

 

Such a simple, flat word for something so important. 

 

Good. 

 

It had been good to hug Sasuke last time they’d spoken.

It had been good to laugh with Kurenai.

It had been good to see Obito and Iruka kiss.

It had been good to watch Itachi dote on his daughter.

 

Good good.

 

He takes a detour, walks by some of the older parts of the village on a whim. 

There, old Ichiraku’s. It’s a ways down now, actually, bigger and becoming quite popular, thanks to Naruto’s love for it. The cemetery is ways over there, but he doesn’t need to go there today. 

There is no-one there he has to mourn anymore.

 

No-one left not at peace.

 

Here, this is where Naruto’s old house had been, before Pain, and before the attack a few years ago. A flash of pain in his guts, as he remembers how he stood here, with the Sandaime. 

He still feels lingering shame and regret at not having fought harder, then, but knows logically that he couldn’t have.

But that’s past now.

 

He inhales, deeply, turning back towards the tower.

 

At least none of the few orphans they have now will ever be subjected to this fate again, he made the rule that every child would need to be taken up by a family. 

The council had objected. What if no family would be found…?

Kakashi’s smile had been sharp, and vicious. 

He had pulled down his mask for the answer. “Well. Then my husband and I will take them.”

Silence, after that. 

 

He had taken no objections.

 

One of the few times he had put his foot down. 

Together with the order of dismantling the Ne… and the railroad system. 

 

He smirks to himself, remembering how annoyed Shikamaru was and is whenever Uncle Gaara comes to visit. Which is, granted, rather frequently.

But then they are at peace now, aren’t they, and Shukaku and Kurama really like each other. Even if they pretend not to. And Temari loves her brothers, some of the natural homesickness lessened whenever she sees them.

And of course Gaara has his own adopted son now, and bringing him along, and he and Shikadai are slowly warming to each other, too. But it seems to be quite loud in the Nara home when Gaara is there, and it is known that Shikamaru prefers the quiet of his office then at times. 

Which in turn makes Gaara and Kankuro stay longer.

 

Catch 22.

 

He’s still snickering to himself when he enters the tower, the huge entrance hall quiet, almost tranquil. 

 

But then it isn’t a normal day, is it.

 

 

He nods at the jonin level kunoichi who is bored out of her skull behind the desk and ascends via the stairs, carefully feeling every step. 

Trying to remember the feeling, knowing it won’t really be different, and yet…

 

And yet.

 

Shikamaru is waiting for him on the upper landing, looking mightily tired, but also mightily happy to be here. Ah yes. Uncle Gaara.

Kakashi grins. “I see you didn’t have the peace of mind to stay home?”

Shikamaru glowers at him. “They are throwing dummy kunais at each other across the table.”

Kakashi snorts. “At least it’s not sand?”

Shikamaru sighs, deeply. “You’re laughing, but do you know what Shinki’s specialty is?”

Kakashi shakes his head.

Shikamaru leans in. “Iron sand. Which he shapes into kunais, yes, you got that right.”

Kakashi lowers his head, trying to curb his mirth. “I see.”

Shikamaru grunts. “It’s annoying.”

Kakashi winks at him. “It’s family.”

 

Shikamaru scoffs, and then sobers a bit, nodding at the hallway over his shoulder. “He’s in the office.”

Kakashi nods. “I know.”

Shikamaru exhales. “Konohamaru is with him.”

Kakashi nods again. “I’m glad.”

Shikamaru reaches up, squeezes Kakashi’s shoulder. “I’ll be outside on the bench.” He hesitates, before nodding. “Rokudaime.”

Kakashi reaches up, to cover his hand with his own for a moment, before stepping forward, towards his office. 

 

 

 

He hesitates outside the door, for a few seconds, hearing laughter, before entering quietly, non-intrusive.

 

Konohamaru and Naruto are on the floor in the middle of the room, gesticulating wildly, and speaking wildly on top of each other, obviously about a joint adventure, and involving the sexy jutsu, of course, and dumb faces, Ebisu likely, and perverts, that would be Jiraiya, and the village prudery, everyone else. 

 

Naruto looks up when he closes the door, and his blue eyes are red-rimmed but bright, sparkling, drenched in desperate happiness, and Kakashi knows the feeling, nodding at him, once.

Naruto’s hands are clenched on the hat.

 

Kakashi exhales, and then shoots an eye-smile at Konohamaru, who sobers up slowly, pushing up with a grin at Naruto. 

He exhales. “I’ll leave you alone.” He pulls a face. “I have to read that tactics book anyways, Sensei Ebisu wants me to know that special one he heard about from someone from Cloud, and it’s supposedly a reference to Hashirama, so…”

Kakashi nods. “Yeah, he was really excited about that.” He winks. “Have fun.”

Konohamaru sighs, deeply. 

 

He waves at Naruto, but leaves with only a smile, the silence descending at once heavy and yet golden, a mixture of grief, and light, and hope, and love.

 

Naruto fiddles with the hat in his hand. “That was very nice of you to let her give it to me.”

Kakashi snorts, and then hesitates, before pulling the couch over and into the sunlight, and settling on it, with a sigh. “You think she would have let me do it otherwise?”

Naruto snickers, and then hums, pushing up from the ground with a sniff. “Probably not.” He hesitates, and then reaches down, to gently pick up the hat, and put it behind him onto the arm rest of the sofa. 

When he turns back to Kakashi, he seems extremely serious, extremely… adult. 

 

Kakashi blinks, trying to shake the mental image. 

Such a weird thing, to have this awareness in this moment. 

To realize how very far they’ve come.

 

Naruto edges closer, one leg pulled up, naked feet seeming weird in this setting, but apparently completely at ease.

He smirks softly. “Where are the kids?”

Kakashi pulls his one leg up as well, moves in a bit as well. “With their siblings. I bet they’ll terrorize the village again later.”

Naruto snickers, and then nods, reaching up to ghost his fingers through Kakashi’s hair, before dropping them, to the mask. “I want to see you for this.”

Kakashi snorts, and then waits as Naruto pulls it down, playfully nipping at the fingers when they pass by his mouth.

Naruto mock-growls at him. “Hey. No attacking the Hokage.”

Kakashi laughs out, gutturally. “Oh? Don’t you need the coat for this, too?”

Naruto makes a show of weighing his head. “I think the hat suffices.”

Kakashi smirks, but then reaches up, to unclasp his coat. “Yes. But I like you in white.”

He leans in, throwing the coat back and over Naruto’s shoulders, watching it settle, like wings being folded. 

Naruto whispers, there between them. “You like me in nothing.”

Kakashi hums. “True, true, but white is good, too.” 

Naruto is biting his lips. “Will we mess it up later?”

Kakashi winks at him, watching the pupils dilate. “If you’re a good little Hokage?”

Naruto blinks, and then starts giggling, shaking his head. 

 

His head comes down to rest against Kakashi’s forehead. 

Kakashi reaches up to hold him to himself, very gently. 

He licks his lips. “I have a gift for you.” He reaches into the big pocket of his old school vest he wore today, pulling out the hiraishin kunai he got from Minato so long ago. “This is yours now.” He hesitates, shrugging just a bit. “I don’t need it, I will always reach you when I need to, but… I want you to have this. It’s your legacy. Give it to our children, eventually.”

Naruto sniffs, and then nods, carefully not dislodging him. “That is beautiful.” He takes it from Kakashi, suddenly grinning fiendishly. “Think they’re here now?”

Kakashi trails his hand from Naruto’s hand down his wrist, lets it drop to Naruto’s knee. “They?”

Naruto blinks, locking their gazes on short distance. “My Dad… Jiraiya.” He swallows. “Mom… Mom said, before… you know…” He hesitates, swallowing again, and then pushes on, voice just a little bit wobbly. “She said she’d send them here, today, so they could… witness… and I…”

Kakashi smirks, and then smiles, broadly, nudging Naruto’s nose. “You know, if your Mom said they’d be here, then they’re here.”

Naruto snickers. “Right.”

Kakashi hums. “They’re probably sharing a popsicle for all we know.”

 

 

Kokodrawings - Inauguration

 

 

 

Naruto laughs out loud. “Oh god, yes, I bet…” He sobers, just a bit, slight pain bleeding into his expression, longing. “I hope they’re proud of me.”

Kakashi hums. “I have no doubt.” He hesitates, and then continues, voice soft. “Jiraiya once told me that Minato was too young. That he became the Hokage too soon.” He shakes his head, just a bit. “But you are not. You are so much wiser already, have experienced so much pain. Have made so many friends, have changed our world forever.” He exhales, shudderingly. “Have changed me, forever, for the better.” His throat clicks as he swallows. “You have saved me, though I did not know it at the time. Knowing you, loving you, has been the greatest blessing of my life. All the pain, and the doubt, and here we are, today.”

Naruto squeezes his eyes shut for a long moment, a tear trailing down his cheek. 

He echoes, quietly. “Here we are.” He smiles, brokenly. “I love you.”

 

Kakashi winks at him. “You better. I gave up my job for you.”

Naruto bursts out laughing. “Oh? Will you stay at home, waiting for me?”

Kakashi hums, pretending to think about it. “Well, our children usually run around without us already…” He weighs his head. “So I mean, I could stay at home, right, in bed… make sure there’s enough incentive for the Hokage to come home in the evenings.”

Naruto bites his lips, his eyes getting rapidly darker. “Oh, that would be quite the incentive.”

Kakashi smirks at him. “Well that’s settled then.” He hums. “Though I could maybe teach at the academy a few times, too.”

Naruto quirks an eyebrow. “Definitely when our kids are there.” He snickers. “Poor Sensei Iruka.”

Kakashi narrows his eyes, squeezes him just below the knee. “Hey!”

 

Naruto snickers, and then tilts his head, to kiss him, and Kakashi’s last thought is, that if Minato and Jiraiya are really here… they’re about to get an eyeful.

 

He grins, while Naruto moans into his mouth.

 

 

 

 

Oh well.

 

I’ll hear all about that when I’m dead.

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 70: Epilogue

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

 

 

 

Kakashi pops his head through the door, calling into the busy office. “Want anything specific from Ichiraku’s later, dear?”

 

He hastily withdraws when something comes hurtling his way, together with a curse, and then a yell: “You really weren’t joking in regards to the paperwork?!”

Kakashi pops his head in again. “Nope.” He waggles his eyebrows. “I’m gonna lie in the sun a bit.”

A growl, and some suppressed snickers. 

Konohamaru’s expression is mightily pinched, trying not to laugh.

Kakashi winks at him, while nodding at Itachi. “Still want to poker with me, Obito and Iruka?”

Itachi inclines his head. “I will endeavor not to lose as much money as last time, Senpai.”

Kakashi purses his lips. “Good luck.” He tilts his head, and looks at Kurenai. “I’ll pick up Mirai for some training later.” He waves. “See you later. I’ll bring the usual from Ichiraku’s!”

 

And he’s gone, snickering to himself, and the sun is beautiful outside, indeed.

 

High up on the Hokage heads he can hear screaming and shouting, and the groans, shaking his head, and then ignores it, leaving it to the more than capable hands of the Anbu to chase and eventually catch the willful children.

 

A memory of Naruto, high up there. 

And him, catching him.

 

Fate or not… I could not help loving you.

 

And I fought it so hard.

 

 

But. Here we are.

 

And… I’m so happy.

 

 

 

He shoots a look up, just in case, catching Sai’s consternated gaze for just an instance.

He grins, and averts his gaze again, wondering what kind of makeup the heads will get this time, the kids surprisingly creative. No slurs on the stone, oh no. 

Kakashi has a folder with pictures though.

 

 

 

He lifts his face into the sun, and opens his eyes to it, activating the sharingan with all the love he feels.

 

 

 

 

He turns and leaves, knowing his wavering vision is not sharingan-overusage.

 

 

 

 

 

 

--- The end. ---

 

 

 

 

 

 

Notes:

Gosh, guys… thank you for reaching the end with me.

 

I knew how it should end when I started, and… I hope I could bring it across? (That art has been commissioned AGES ago, lol.)
It’s been such a journey, and an extremely rewarding one, too.
Thank you, so, SO much, for taking it with me. Thank you for being HERE now, with me.

Thank you for all your comments, and thank you for all your love.
What a ride.

 

Love you guys!

 

I'll miss you.

 

I'll probably go and finish Chakra Flares now, apart from the other fics that I'm writing for IWTV these days... my DMs on Tumblr are always open.
Come by and say hi anytime :)

Notes:

I hope you enjoy!
I'd really love to hear what you think though, criticism and comments are always welcome! 💕 !
You can scream at me on Twitter or Tumblr, too 😉