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Without You I’m Nothing

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Lena stepped out onto her balcony, the moon illuminating up the dark night sky . Her eyes shifted from left to right, scanning the sky; looking for that familiar red and blue blur. She had a nervous churning in the pit of her stomach: the one that let her know when something was about to happen. She shivered slightly unsure if it was because of the cool, damp California night or the nervousness she felt. She pulled the dark grey cardigan she wore tighter around her small frame as she sighed slowly retreating back into the warmth of her penthouse, making sure the glass door slid shut before she turned in for the night.

Just as she was about to turn out the light. She felt a gust of wind as she felt a familiar presence grab onto her waist and another hand cover her mouth before she had a chance to speak. Lena tried to twist out of the strong imposing grasp as her fight or flight instincts began to kick in. She felt warm breath on her neck, as the intruder’s lips barely brushed the shell of her ear as they whispered.

“Please don’t struggle Lena. It’s just me.” Kara whispered her voice was husky and laced with lust.
“I need you Lena please.” She pleaded against Lena’s ear. The arm around Lena’s waist tightened, pulling her body closer to Kara’s muscular frame, causing her to draw a sharp breath against the hand clasped over her mouth. While the endorphins continued to pump through Lena’s veins, her body started to relax into Kara’s as she continued to whisper. “I’m going to take my hand off your mouth now. You’re okay I’m not going to hurt you I promise.”

Lena’s hand let go of the wrist of Kara’s hand as the Kryptonian slowly released her grip from around Lena’s mouth. Lena was still staring at the terrace doors of her penthouse, her head practically spun as she felt Kara press the softness of her lips against the sensitive spot just behind her ear. As Lena’s body betrayed her by pressing back into the Super’s body behind her, Only one thought ran through her head. She knew this was wrong but she also knew Kara was right. She did want this and gawd did she ever need this.

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Kara’s lips are soft and insistent, continuing to press against Lena’s neck in various spots. Lena’s eyes fluttered shut and her mouth parted slightly letting out a small moan. The nervous churn in Lena’s stomach turned into a heat that tightened as she shifted slightly in Kara’s arms. The blonde loosened her grip and allowed Lena to turn and face her.

Kara felt like she had been hit by a lightning bolt when their eyes met ocean blue meeting forest green. But Kara quickly shifted her gaze to Lena’s neck focusing on the small freckle that stood out on the beauty’s porcelain skin. She was always so beautiful and this moment was no exception, despite the sordidness of this encounter. Rao, how Kara loved her, but she had hurt Lena so many times in the past. Their arrangement served to fulfill their most carnal of desires and nothing more. There could never be more. Kara didn’t deserve more.

For a brief moment, Lena thought she saw love in Kara’s eyes but the veil the girl of steel had so carefully learned to perfect had slipped back into place before Lena could be completely sure. She lifted her hand, her fingers barely brushing Kara’s cheek. If this arrangement they had was the only way Kara would let her be with her, then so be it. Lena would take what she could get.

While the secret that once stood between them like a thick wall was gone, Kara’s self-censure for the circumstances that led to Lena’s discovery of her true nature had built a new wall between them: one far more imposing than its predecessor. Lena loved Kara so much and had long forgiven her for everything: the secrets, the lies, everything. She just wished Kara would forgive herself and let her back in.

Kara bent her head and captured Lena's lips with her own in a kiss filled with want. The super’s hands splayed across the brunette’s lower back, pulling her tighter towards her. Kara swallowed the little moan that escaped Lena’s throat and deftly massaged her tongue with her own. Kara’s groin began to tighten under her super suit as Lena's hands tangled in the soft blonde hair at the base of Kara’s skull. Kara's hands moved over to Lena’s shoulders pushing the cardigan down her arms as it fell onto the dark polished wood floor. Kara moved her hands under the hem of Lena's shirt, her fingers unconsciously tracing the scar that permanently marred the soft skin beneath them.

When Lena felt Kara’s fingers there, She broke the kiss gasping for air as she whispered, “It wasn't your fault Kara. I'm proud of it. It means that you and I…” but Lena didn’t get to finish as Kara quickly responded

“Please, don't talk. I don't want to talk. You know what I want.” Kara interrupted as she squeezed her eyes shut trying to block out what Lena just said. Kara didn’t want Lena’s forgiveness. She didn't deserve it. She didn't even deserve this, but Lena knew all she had to do was ask Kara to stop. Yet she never did.

Kara slid her hands upward as Lena's shirt lifted. Pulling away from her slightly, letting her eyes rake over the porcelain skin of Lena’s abdomen, before briefly focusing on the scar left by the bullet. Kara needed to be reminded it was all her fault. Her hands continued to move upward and when her fingers met with the back of Lena’s bra, she undid the clasp before sliding her hands around so her fingers could trace the outer curves of Lena’s supple breasts.

Lena’s head gently lolled back and her lips parted slightly when Kara's fingers met with her breasts. Her nipples started to tighten and warmth began to flood her pussy in anticipation. She didn't have to wait long before she felt Kara’s hands move from her breasts to the back of her thighs, lifting her so she could wrap her legs around the Kryptonian’s waist. Bringing Lena’s breasts to Kara’s eye level.

Kara grunted softly as Lena's legs wrapped around her waist. The blonde reached up and pushed Lena’s shirt and bra up, baring her perfectly well rounded breasts to her. Kara studied them for a moment, as she did each time they made love no…fucked, Kara corrected herself. She didn't deserve Lena’s love, she thought as her tongue leapt out to lick over one of Lena’s hardening nipples.

Lena’s fingers dug into Kara’s shoulders as she slowly licked and sucked on Lena’s aching nipples. For the most part, Kara was always a generous and attentive lover despite the issues between them. Lena tried to choke down a strangled cry “Kara.” She whispered harshly as Kara lips wrapped around her now straining nipple, the super’s mouth gently suckling while her tongue licked the tip over and over. Lena moved her hand from Kara's shoulder and placed it on the side of her face, gently urging her to pay attention to the other breast.

Kara felt Lena's gentle nudge at her head and eagerly moved to lavish the same attention to her other breast. The blonde raked her teeth over Lena’s nipple, the little mewls coming from above making her twitch and strain against the seam of her super suit. Kara could feel Lena digging her nails into her shoulders, but it certainly didn't hurt. It only served to make her hotter; but Kara’s ultimate undoing was when Lena reached down, as she pulled her small sleeping shorts free from between their bodies and pressed her slick soaked panties into Kara’s suit cover abdomen before whispering desperately “Please Kara, please I need you.”

As Kara let her slide downward a bit, Lena felt herself moving backwards and braced for the inevitable impact of her bedroom door to back. But instead she was met with the softness of her mattress. As Kara gently laid her out on the black silk sheets. As the Kryptonian was already working on changing out of her super suit and into her civilian clothes. Kara quickly discarded her navy blouse and bra. Lena watched as Kara swiftly worked on undoing the belt of her pants as she quickly pulled her boxer briefs and pants down to her ankles revealing her hard and thick cock to Lena. Who let out a tiny whimper and instinctively clenched her pussy at the thought of having Kara between her legs. The look of wanting in Kara’s blue eyes quickly led Lena to crawl over to Kara as she hungrily pressed her lips to hers.
Capturing Kara’s moan in her mouth as she felt Kara’s hands gently wrap around her waist.

Bringing her closer as she held Lena against her strong frame never wanting to let go. Wanting to hold onto Lena as if she was the most precious thing in the world. Because she was the most important and precious thing to Kara but Lena couldn’t know that. She deserved better than Kara. Or so Kara had convinced herself of that. So this was all they shared. This was all Kara had left to give since that dreaded day Lena got her scar.

Kara let herself get lost in the kiss if only for a few seconds. Letting herself imagine how if things had been different then maybe she and Lena stood a chance. But that was just a pipe dream and this was what was left. So she was going to make the most of it.
As Kara reached down to
Lena’s panties and ripped them clean off of Lena. As she let out a small gasp at the sheer force of Kara’s strength. It made her more aroused to know that if Kara wanted to she could crush her. But Kara was never rough with her, at least not enough to hurt her.

Lena felt Kara wrap her legs around her waist as Kara’s cock pressed against her thigh. Letting her feel how much Kara truly needed her.
Kara broke the heated kiss as her finger parted the crease of Lena’s slick pussy lips, watching as Lena's lips part as she sucked in a lungful of air in an audible gasp. “Kara please.” Lena whispered in need.
Kara pressed her finger into the wetness feeling Lena’s inner walls tighten around it, trying to draw it in deeper, before pulling it out and gently swirling the tip around the hard nub at the apex of her sex.

Lena bucked against Kara's finger. She pressed her face to the curve of the blonde’s neck, her lips brushing the skin at her collarbone as Lena again whispered,”Kara please.” She wasn’t sure if she was begging for the sex or if she was begging Kara to forgive herself. Perhaps it was a bit of both.

Kara shifted Lena's weight upward and positioned her straining cock at Lena’s entrance. Kara felt Lena's forearms press into her shoulders as she tried to hold herself up in an attempt to help. Kara pressed her forearm under Lena's ass as she placed the brunette over her precum leaking tip. Letting gravity let Lena’s weight down onto her cock. As Kara felt Lena’s tight
warm and wet core slowly sheathe her hard length.
As she shuddered at the snugness of Lena’s tight inner muscles rippling around her. “Lena fuck so tight…so perfect.” Kara whispered against Lena’s neck as she felt Lena’s nails digging into her neck.
“Kara gawd you’re in so deep…feels so good.” Lena whined on top of her as she felt the brunette start a slow bounce. Rising up until only the tip of Kara’s cock was inside then slowly sliding back down as she purposely gripped Kara’s length tightly inside of her.

It always amazed Kara how perfectly they fit together.
It was as if they were built for each. Like two puzzle pieces fitting together to complete the bigger picture.
Maybe if things were different and Kara had been honest about who she was sooner they might have had a chance at a relationship but it was a little too late for that. This is all they had left. So why not make the most of it?

“You feel so good Lena.” Kara groaned out into the skin of Lena’s shoulder as she rested her forehead there. Enjoying the way Lena kept bouncing on her cock. Lena’s inner muscles continued to contract around the thick cock inside her. She let out a whimper when the head of Kara’s cock came into contact with her cervix. “Oh yes.” Lena whimpered, riding the Super harder. Loving the way Kara strained against her trying hard not to thrust into her welcoming heat.
But Lena was having none of that; she would have all of Kara, even the parts that hurt. So Lena purposely contracted her inner muscles harder, earning a loud whimper from Kara as she moaned “Lena please, I can’t.” Lena felt Kara struggle against her. Fighting every urge in her to thrust savagely into Lena and take what had always been hers. Lena continued to work herself up and down on Kara’s thickness. Determine to make Kara come undone under her. Kara moved her face from Lena’s shoulder to her neck inhaling the beautiful scent of Lena. As her hands traveled down Lena’s waist to grip Lena’s ass. Bringing her closer to her.

Lena felt so full her insides burning as she rode Kara. She was close, she thought as she tightened her inner walls briefly around Kara’s dick. Lena nipped at Kara’s neck before lifting her head to whisper huskily in her ear, “Tell me what it feels like.”

Kara groaned when she heard Lena's request. Through gritted teeth she replied, “Warm. Wet. Ungh. Tight. Rao, so fucking good.” Kara felt Lena's inner walls clench around her again. As Kara whispered back “Tell me what it feels like?”

Lena was panting against her ear before finally husking out, “Full. So full. Oh God, right there Kara.” Lena could feel Kara starting to slowly thrust up into her with more insistence. She could still feel the very tip of Kara’s cock gently bumping against her cervix with every upstroke, her clit grinding delightfully against the Kryptonian’s tight stomach and on every downstroke, she could feel the bulbous head scrape across that sweet spot on her front inner wall.

Kara could feel her balls starting to tighten the harbinger of her impending orgasm. It took all the strength she could muster to hold back, slowing the pace slightly as she slid her hands back up to Lena’s waist holding her down onto her which caused a near-pained moan from Lena. Kara shuddered as Lena whispered in her ear, “Please tell me what you want.”

Kara moved one hand from Lena’s waist to in between their bodies. Where she pressed her fingers into Lena's engorged clit, moving them in a circular motion. She felt Lena's lips slide down her neck before she gently bit down on her shoulder and moaned out “Kara yes just like that don’t stop I’m so close.” Her lower body pressing harder into both of the blonde’s fingers and hard length. Kara knew her wants were clear, but she also knew that actually saying it would help things along. “I want to feel you cumming around me, Lena.” Kara groaned.

Lena suddenly released the bit of skin from Kara’s shoulder she was holding between her teeth with a strangled cry. Her head flew backwards as she pressed her upper body weight harder down onto Kara’s thick cock allowing Kara to press deeper into her tight wet and warm pussy. Lena felt the tingle starting in her belly and spread to her clit, which virtually sung against Kara’s swirling finger. Her inner walls milked Kara’s length as her orgasm began to wash over her.
“Kara! Oh fuck Kara I love you.”

Kara was barely able to hold on as Lena came. She watched Lena’s face through slitted eyes. Kara was certain Lena was even more beautiful when she came; she was practically glowing. Kara watched as Lena lifted her head, her eyes opening and locking with Kara’s, her lips slightly parted and quivering as she mewled while Kara ground out her orgasm.

For the first time since that day so long ago, Kara looked into Lena’s eyes and couldn't look away. The love and longing Kara saw there forced her over the precipice and into her own orgasm. Kara’s mouth opened and shut, then opened again with a grunt.
“Lena!” Neither broke eye contact as the warm rush of seed spilled into Lena.

They continued to stare into one another's eyes as Kara stilled, her cock twitching inside Lena as her inner walls fluttered around her lightly. It wasnt until Lena’s hand reached up to gently stroke Kara’s cheek while she whispered a profession of love, “Kara I love you. I love you, please it’s okay.” Did the spell break. Kara forced her gaze downward as she started to lift Lena off her.

Feeling the sudden emotional disconnect, Lena wrapped her legs tighter around Kara’s waist. Kara dug her fingers into Lena’s waist almost painfully, but the brunette chose to ignore it.

“No. Kara Danvers Zor-EL, you listen to me. It wasn't your fault. None of it was your fault. I forgave you a long time ago. It's time you forgave yourself. Please, don’t do this to me.” Lena pleaded as she tried to reconnect with her.

“Protecting me, what I am, what I can do should not be your burden to carry. He never would have been able to get to me through you if I had just let you go.” Kara spat back. Her eyes were squeezed shut. She could feel the tears welling up behind her closed lids and forced them back.

“Lex was obsessed. He would have done anything to use my magic against you. Even hurting me. I don't blame you for what Lex did. How could you have known?” Lena was desperate now. This had been the most they had talked since that day Lex kidnapped her, took her to his secret bunker, and demanded that Lena use her new magical powers to bestow him with the power to kill any Kryptonian and all other alien life. Lena had refused to help him,despite the torture.

She wasn't talking about Lex. Kara pressed a fist to her forehead, bouncing it gently, as if trying to beat back the memory of getting to the bunker, her heart threatening to pound out of her chest and hearing the gunshot. She rushed into the bunker to find Lena, broken and bleeding on the floor, as Lex stood over her with the gun.

Kara was so angry if it hadn't been for Lena, she would have surely killed Lex. Somehow, Lena had mustered up enough strength to stand up and get to Kara just before she issued the fatal punch. It was her gentle touch that broke the rage. She finally collapsed into Kara's arms, the lower half of her shirt soaked with blood. Lena had simply looked up at her, tears in her green eyes, smiled and said, “I love you.”

Kara managed to get Lena to the hospital in time however, she was devastated when Andrea told her that the bullet had virtually shredded Lena's uterus. It was like she was hearing everything Andrea told her in slow motion. Lena was never going to be able to have children. Not only had the Luthors taken her mother away from her, but they took Lena’s only chance of having a family of her own away from her as well.

Numb, Kara went back to the bunker. Of course, Lex had long since run like the coward he had always been. Kara screamed. She cried. She even cursed. When her eyes fell on the blood stain on the floor, Lena’s blood she ran over, pulled back her fist and pounded on the ground. The only thing that stopped her from issuing a second blow was the memory of Lena laying close to lifeless there saying she loved her.

Kara’s heart sank. It truly was completely her fault. Had she not been so in love with Lena, she never would've been here trying to stop her sadistic brother from trying to rid the world of alien life once again. How could she have been so stupid to not think that Lex would exploit Lena. How could she ever face Lena again, yet how could she not? Despite the guilt consuming her, Kara was still in love with her and imagined she always would be.

Kara left the bunker and returned to the hospital. She was almost relieved when she found Lena sleeping soundly in her hospital bed. Kara pulled the single chair in the room close to her bed, holding her hand as she told her everything. Including exactly how she felt about her. No more secrets, Kara had told her as she confessed the depth of her love for Lena. The Kryptonian also told Lena how she could never forgive herself for being the cause of so much pain in Lena’s life. When Kara was finally finished confessing, she stood up, kissed Lena's forehead and left.

Kara never saw Lena's eyes open as she walked away, the silent tears beginning to streak her cheeks as she turned her head to watch Kara walk out of the room. She never realized that in Lena's eyes, there was nothing to forgive her for. Kara never realized that the second Lena was kidnapped by Lex, everything had become so crystal clear.

It wasn’t long after Lena had finally healed that she went to Kara’s apartment one evening in search of Kara . She hadn't seen the blonde since that night in the hospital. She tried to talk to her, but Kara wouldn't even look at her. Kara just clenched and unclenched her fists as Lena tried desperately to connect with her on an emotional level. Kara flinched every time Lena tried to touch her. Lena finally tried to connect with the Kryptonian the last way she knew how.

It had been awkward and near desperate a haphazard virginal attempt by both to comfort the other. Lena made love to Kara. However, she wasn't sure if Kara had made love to her. Through the whole ordeal, the blonde still hadn't looked her in the eyes. Kara held her briefly afterwards, but when Lena reaffirmed her love for her with a whisper, Kara pulled away from her. While it was unspoken, their arrangement had been born that night and Lena understood that for now, she needed to keep her feelings for Kara close to her chest.

“Kara?” Lena was beginning to worry now. Kara had been sitting there, her softening penis still inside her, with her fist planted on her forehead for what felt like an eternity. It had been nearly a year since they had first been together and Lena hadn't told Kara she loved her since the night of their first time. She had hoped, when Kara had finally made eye contact with her, that the time was right.

“I'm sorry, Lena. I can’t.” Kara’s voice was filled with self-loathing. How could Lena have forgiven her so easily?

Lena gently bucked against Kara, her hands sliding across her broad shoulders. Lena leaned forward and pressed her forehead against Kara’s,her nose gently rubbing Kara’s as she laid a soft kiss on Super's upper lip.

“Please, Kara. Don’t walk away from me.” Lena pleaded. Her fingernails were gently raking across Kara’s neck now. She was slowly shifting her weight and could feel Kara’s desire begin to stir again. Lena kissed her full on this time and again whispered, “Please.”

Kara knew this was wrong. She couldn’t let herself love her; but it was almost like she needed this. In a sense, it was cathartic. Kara deepened the kiss, pouring long buried emotion into it.

Lena’s breath caught in her throat. She was afraid she was imagining it, but it was like she could feel Kara finally. Lena felt one of Kara’s hands move from her waist to the small of her back. Kara broke the kiss to look deeply into her eyes.

“You’re so beautiful Lena.” Kara breathed.

There were tears in Kara’s eyes now. Lena was sure she saw them glistening in the gray-hued moonlight that illuminated her bedroom. She dropped her hand to Kara’s chest and laid it over her breast, feeling the slightly erratic cadence of her heart beneath it. Lena leaned forward and kissed her again, playfully nipping at the blonde’s bottom lip as she started to bounce on Kara’s lap once more.

Kara could feel herself growing hard again inside of Lena’s tight silky warm. It was only then that Kara understood that she truly needed Lena. She needed to take comfort in her. She needed Lena to feel what she had long repressed. Kara moved her hand back to Lena’s waist and slowly lifted her, only to let her slowly slip back down her length. Kara was sensitive, every tiny movement transferring little electric shocks that seemed to center directly in her cock.

“Please, Kara. Tell me what it feels like.” Lena begged. She let her head rest in the curve of Kara’s neck, placing hot, open mouthed kisses over the blonde’s skin.

Kara brought a hand up to cup the back of Lena's neck, urging her to look up at her. When Lena did, Kara looked directly into her emerald eyes and whispered, “It feels like coming home. I love you Lena”
The pair continued to make love to each other into the morning. As both exhausted themselves and ended up falling asleep in each other’s arms. Finally starting to heal from what they had thought they had both lost.
This was their new beginning and they both knew they would get through anything life would throw at them together.