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1000 bottles of tequila on the wall

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Personally he was never playing fucking Horse again, especially not with these assholes. Jensen swore and gritted his teeth when he heard someone laugh behind him. "Fuck you," he said to the floor. He was still at least half drunk, but he was pretty sure he could rip Clay's head off and shove it up his ass before he noticed, and he said so. Loudly.

"Yeah, well," Clay said. He wasn't the one who'd been laughing, and Jensen started planning crazy revenge fantasies starring Pooch and Cougar losing a testicle apiece. And then forcing them to eat them. "You're welcome to try."

"Just wait," he said. "What the fuck is taking so long?" Jensen asked, trying to get up on his elbows so he could turn around and look at his back.

"Don't move," Cougar said, putting a hand on the back of Jensen's neck and shoving his face back into the table.

"Yeah," Pooch said, snickering. "You'll smudge."

"Fuck you sideways," he said, or maybe just thought. The pain came and went, not always connected to what was actually happening on his spine, and he swore Cougar's hand softened and petted him a little bit, like a cat, but that was fucking crazy. He needed to lay off the tequila with the little cirrhosis worms. It led to crazy things like this. The last thing he needed was more ink, if that was even ink in the barrels – not a sure thing in an upstanding place like this.

He absolutely did not sigh but maybe took a deep breath, and Cougar's hand tightened on the back of his neck. "I'm not a welsher," he told the table, and it must have agreed with him because it didn't say anything.

"You're done," Aisha told him, crouching in front of the table. The buzzing stopped when the tattoo guy turned off the machine, and then Jensen let himself relax. Not that he didn't trust girlfriend, but – well –

She gave him a hand up, and someone else was there with his shirt, and they left the tattoo parlor a fragrant goodbye present in the side alley.


A week later, they finally let him take the bandages off and look at the tattoo on his spine. It took three mirrors and a really strangely placed light, but Jensen finally got a good angle.

Property of Cougar, it said in blocky letters.

"I'm going to fucking kill you all!"