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They couldn’t have a funeral.

 

They didn’t have a body, how could they have a proper funeral.

 

Chu Shuzi barely listened to the short speech Zhao Yunlan was giving. His head was fuzzy, and the sound of people sobbing threatened to overwhelm him. All he could do, was stare at his shoes.

 

He refused to cry.

 

Slipping away, he didn’t look back.

 

………………………………………………………………………………….

 

It was only when he was sure that he was alone, that Chu Shuzi broke, falling to his knees and burying his face in his hands.

 

Maybe tomorrow, he’ll wake up and it will all be a dream.

 

He couldn’t help but think of how different things could have been if it were him instead. Nothing about this was fair… Guo Changcheng was too young to be gone like this.

 

All he wanted to do, was scream to the sky and beg whoever would listen to make things better, scream until his throat felt raw.

 

Best do that in the relative comfort of his own apartment.

 

………………………………………………………………………

 

He awoke with a start, his nightmare fading away to give light to the reality he was dealt. He yawned, rubbing at his eyes for a moment before moving to stand up, only to collapse back down, burying his face in his hands.

 

It still didn’t feel real to him, or maybe he just didn’t want to believe it.

 

A week after the service, Chu Shuzi packed his bags and snuck out of the city, without saying a word of farewell to anyone. He knew it wasn’t the best thing to do, but he couldn’t handle another goodbye.

 

The SID was a thing of the past, left behind and laid to rest with the boy he loved.