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And Here It Is, Our Final Night Alive

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My feet are aching, and your back is pretty tired,

Chris's tears wet the hem of Felix's shirt, the younger male clutched tightly in his arms to keep his sore feet off the ground, not caring about the strain it put on his own back. Chris couldn't find it in himself to care, even if he wanted to.

And we've drunk a couple bottles babe, and set our grief aside.

The glasses held tightly in both of their hands were evidence enough, half empty and half full with whatever booze they could get their hands on. The rest of the group had elected not to join them, instead rushing to spend time with their own families while Chris and Felix could not. It was just the two left to their own devices in the eerily empty dorm.

Moonlight seeped in through whatever openings in the blinds of the windows it could find, the chaos of the outside world crawling through the cracks in the poorly-fitted glass. The wind was cold and heavy around them, despite the warmth of their tears against each other's skin, an unsettling reminder that they were all alone.

The papers say it's doomsday; 'the button has been pressed.'

The sounds of panicked news reporters on TV had ceased to go on hours before, instead flicking to static as the stations were abandoned. The impending blanket of dread seemed to encompass everything around them; the grey skies that lay outside the faux safety they found behind the dorm walls fell heavier than ever against the deafening silence of the city around them.

We're gonna nuke each other up, boys, 'til old Satan stands impressed.

Chris held Felix's face in his hands, seating the two of them on his own bed, inhabited by a mountain of pillows and stuffed animals and blankets to try and give them a sense of belonging; an attempt to give them a sense of comfort where comfort ran dry.

"It'll be okay, yeah?" Chris's accent was muddied, tears still streaming down his face and betraying the calm and collected smile he tried to put on. Felix leaned up to press a kiss to Chris's lips, a meaningless display of whatever affection Felix could feel towards him through the thick wrapping of an overpowering sorrow.

And here it is, our final night alive.

They lay together, hands clasped to one another's and fingers intertwined. They smile at each other with loving looks, sobbing into each other's arms and holding onto what little strands of composure they can manage. 

As the Earth burns to the ground, oh boy it's you that I lie with as the atom bomb locks in.

The sounds of aircrafts rushing across the sky above them cords through the air effortlessly, and Chris pulls Felix's face to hide in his neck, closing his eyes and trying not to pay too much attention to how badly the both of them are shaking. 

Oh, boy it's you I watch TV with as the world, as the world caves in.

Their small television is turned to it's highest volume, blasting into their ears at a painful volume. Neither of them wince, neither of them laugh as the cooky cartoons playing on children's channels left running for families at home to soothe their distressed kids tell wild and unfunny jokes. 

Chris can't help but think of a better time, a time where Felix would catalog each and every cheesy joke he could get out of the unpopular shows, would whisper them gently to him and laugh at the memory of his first watch. 

You put your finest suit on, I paint my fingernails; oh, we're going out in style, babe. And, everything's on sale.

Felix had squeezed into a poorly sewn suit, and Chris had painted his nails a shimmery colour of pink that Felix had jokingly said would look pretty on him a few months prior. Nobody at the stores cared to pay when they went, open food and spilled drinks littering the bleak and monochrome flooring, barely lit by the flickering lights the employees had failed to replace when they abandoned ship to go home.

The clothes were raked through, only tacky outfits that barely fit the two of them were left when they'd managed to find the motivation to go card through their nearest store and grab whatever they wanted. Felix had cried the whole time, the rest of the members having already left the two of them behind. 

We creep up on extinction, I pull your arms right in. I weep and say goodnight, love, while my organs pack it in.

They'd shoved food into their faces like there was no tomorrow, because there was no tomorrow. Felix had cooked the finest meal Chris had ever laid his eyes on. A ravishing collection of steaks with a variety of buttery and savory sides to fill their plates and their stomachs even as their appetites failed them. Chris had had to run to the bathroom to throw up when Felix started to cry, staring down at a beautiful cake neither of them had the guts to eat. 

Felix hopped off his sore feet into Chris's arms when he stood, not caring about the mess that was his face. Chris sobbed into the embrace, snot and drool running down and wetting the horrific pattern of his suit. That's when they'd tumbled to Chris's bed, which they'd packed full of every soft thing in the apartment like a pregnant cat's nest. Chris wanted Felix to feel pampered, wanted Felix to be surrounded by the stuffed animals he so adored.

And here it is, our final night alive.

Booms sound in the distance and the sound of screaming is muted, distorted like the two are drowning deep at the bottom of the ocean with their ears popped. Pressure builds in their chests from the fear, Felix trembles in Chris's arms and the leader pulls a heap of blankets above them, burying even their heads beneath the fluffy warmth of the weight it provides.

And as the Earth burns to the ground, oh boy it's you that I lie with as the atom bomb locks in.

Chris shuts his eyes as tight as he can. A flurry of butterflies are eating at his chest, gnawing on his flesh from the inside and he swallows hard. He squeezes Felix tightly, not caring to feel bad about the way Felix hisses when the smaller just digs his nails into Chris's back in retaliation. A small kiss presses to Chris's neck.

Oh, boy it's you I watch TV with as the world,

The cheesy kids show short circuits, the TV flicks to static and it's booming in their ears. The white noise is lost in the force that bursts through the air as the noise of shattering glass and rumbling earth overpowers it. The shaking of the building rivals their own, trembling fingers clawing at clothes and skin to try and be as close to one another as possible in a last ditch effort to say their best goodbyes.

The static cuts off and the lights behind Chris's eyes go dark in favor of an emptiness bursting behind his eyelids. The feeling of Felix's trembling hands against his partially bare back fades into a dull quiver and in the last flashes of memory left in his mind he smiles. A bubble of acceptance boils up in his chest, and Felix's shaking can nolonger register against what little is left of the two of them.

as the world caves in.