The marines had thrown a party together with the Atlantis Gay Straight Alliance. Cam had signed off on it, and had thrown in a brief appearance to show that he was supportive of his troops and of the new regulations. John had helped organizing it, and had stayed until 2.
When Cam woke up the morning after, John was lying curled around him on Cam's bed, and there was still glitter in John's hair. Cam was determinedly not jealous. He already knew that John wasn't that much into partying, and he definitely knew that John wasn't the cheating kind. Cam had learned the hard way that jokes about slutty bisexuals were a sore spot with John, just like digs about naughty nurses. Cam hadn't gotten it at first, but Marie – who if possible was even scarier than John when she was angry – had set him straight. So to speak.
It still sucked knowing that John had gone stag to the the party, but it was even worse knowing that if Cam had been less of a coward, they could have gone together. John had even asked him, in that off-handed way he had when he wanted something but didn't want Cam to feel pressured into doing it. He'd said it wasn't a big deal, but Cam knew he had to have been disappointed.
God, he was the worst boyfriend ever. Feeling disgusted with himself, he threw off the sheets of his body and climbed out of bed. If it hadn't been for his knee, that had never gotten fully healed, he would go out for a run about now, letting sheer exhaustion beat his brain into submission. As it was now, he'd just have to settle for a shower.
He peeled off his briefs and threw them in the general direction of the hamper and then he got into the shower. He didn't have the gene, but the Ancient showers worked fine for everyone. The anthropologists figured that the Ancients only used ATA-interfacing for the stuff they didn't want in enemy hands, like weapons systems and the jumpers. In a perfect world, Cam would have the gene and civilians like John (especially John) wouldn't have to risk their lives in the Chair and the jumpers during enemy attacks, but this wasn't a perfect world, so Cam was happy as long as he could shower without anyone's help (even if imagining calling up McKay at seven in the morning to make him initialize the shower for him was pretty hilarious).
“Room for one more?” John's voice called out, and Cam jumped a little. John could be pretty stealthy when he wanted to be, and Cam hadn't heard him enter the bathroom.
“Knock yourself out,” Cam said. “I didn't mean to wake you up.”
John slipped into the shower behind him. “Your angsting could be heard across the room,” he said drily, and Cam frowned a little, stung by John's cavalier attitude.
He saw John reaching past him for the soap, and then he felt John's hands on his shoulders, working up the soap to a lather against his skin.
John sighed. “You know I didn't mean it like that.”
“I wish you weren't so nice about it,” Cameron complained. “I deserve to feel like crap about this”.
“Yeah, poor you for having an understanding partner,” John said, not sounding very sympathetic
at all. “Hands against the wall, please.”
Cam obeyed. “You deserve better,” he said. “You deserve someone who isn't ashamed to be seen with you.”
John's hands stilled against his back. “Are you?” John asked. “Ashamed of me, I mean.”
“Of course not!” Cam exclaimed, and John's hand started their journey down Cam's back again.
“Then I don't see the problem,” he said.
“How can you possibly - “ Cam began, but John interrupted him.
“Look,” John said. “You don't have to out yourself for my sake. Even with the new regs, it could make your life pretty difficult. I get that.”
He abandoned even the pretense of washing Cam's back and enveloped him in a hug.
“I've been with you for what, 2 years? And I've worked with the military for longer than that. I know how difficult this is for you, believe me.” His voice was low, and very close to Cam's ear, and Cam shivered.
“For your sake, I hope that you'll feel ready to come out some day, but that should be your decision, not anyone else's.”
“Not even my partner's?” Cameron asked quietly.
“Not even your partner's,” John said. “I knew what I was getting into when we got together. It was worth it then, and it's worth it now.”
“I love you,” Cam said.
“I know,” John said. He smacked Cam's ass. “Now, spread your legs. I want to rim you.”
“Yes, sir!” Cam couldn't resist.
“You're an ass,” John said, but he sounded happy.
He soaped up his hands again, and gently let his fingers slide in and around Cam's asshole, cleaning him and making him want more all at once. After rinsing away all the traces of soap on his skin, he finally sank to his knees behind Cam, spreading Cam's cheeks with his hands and making Cam groan in frustration and want.
The first touch of John's tongue against the crinkled skin around Cam's opening felt electric. God, but Cam loved this so much – had loved it ever since the first time John did it to him. He'd been completely freaked out when John had first suggested it; it was just so dirty, but he'd ended up loving the intimacy of it, loving the way it made him feel. It was like being fingered and yet completely different, John's agile tongue stabbing wetly into him, teasing nerve-endings he'd previously been completely unaware of. John was far from his first, but what Cam had with him was a far cry from the anonymous fucks Cam had been used to before coming to Atlantis. This was completely outside his realm of experience.
He didn't know how long he was lost in the feeling of John licking him open before he came, but suddenly his orgasm just washed over him, unbidden and irresistible. John hummed appreciatively and delivered a parting nip to Cam's left cheek, and then he was pulling himself to his feet again, his hard cock dragging across Cam's thigh as he rose.
“Give me a second,” Cam panted, “and I'll take care of you.”
“No hurry,” John said. "You're worth waiting for."