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Love Still Hurts: An Anthology

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  It was a pleasant day at Beacon Academy, a time of spring, when the sun begins setting late, the grass smells fresh, and young man’s (and woman’s) fancy turn towards love.  Or something like that.  In any case, because it was such a pleasant day out, both Teams RWBY and JNPR had their windows and doors open, to circulate the air and make the rooms smell fresh and clean as a whistle.

   Ruby walked into her dorm room, as happy as she could be; it was hard not to be happy on a day like this.  Even Cardin was pleasant, and Ozpin had given the students the afternoon off—supposedly as a “field day” to clean their rooms, but everyone knew he really meant just to go enjoy the day.  Weiss was humming to herself while she dusted the shelves—contrary to popular belief, Weiss did know how to clean, and wasn’t wholly dependent on her butlers and waitstaff.  Blake was sitting on her bed, a book open on her chest, the breeze stirring her hair slightly.  Ruby noticed one member of her team was missing.  “Hey, Weiss…where’s Yang?”

   “Bathroom,” Weiss replied, and sure enough, there was the flush of a toilet, followed by the sink turning on. 

   “Oh.”  Ruby headed for the window, to stick her head in the breeze and smell the world outside, but then noticed Yang’s Scroll, slightly dented, on the nightstand.  Idly, she glanced down at it.  The Scroll was open, and it looked like Yang was reading something.  Ruby picked it up and looked at the heading, just as Yang walked out of the bathroom.  “Hey, Yang?” she asked, as innocent as the proverbial wooly lamb, “what’s yuri?”

   Yang’s eyes widened to comic proportions and she dashed forward, snatching the Scroll out of Ruby’s hand.  Her face flushed red.  “I’m learning Russian, so shut up!”

    Ruby cocked her head to one side, like a dog confronted with the unknown.  “But Yang…what’s Russian?”

    “You’ll be russian away from my fist if you touch my Scroll again!”  Yang closed her Scroll, gave Ruby a homicidal look, and jumped into her bunk.

    Ruby, either out of curosity, naivete, or a lack of good sense, persisted.  “But I want to know!  Does it have something to do with that Mistrali comic I saw the other day?  It had two girls in it, and they were kissing each other while having their way with a poor tentacle Grimm?”  She paused.  “Or maybe the Grimm was having its way with them.  Anyway, something like that?”  Yang’s furious look faded, replaced with a mixture of her own curiosity and horror over the idea of her dear, sweet, innocent little sister reading tentacle porn.

    Weiss set her books back on her shelf in alphabetical order.  “Ruby, do you even know what ‘have their way’ means?”

    “Duh, Weiss!”  Ruby slumped a little, folding her arms over her chest.  “I’m 14, not four!”

    “I honestly don’t know what you’re talking about, Rubes.”  Yang, from her position in the top bunk, could not see Blake trying to hide behind her book.

   “Really? It’s in Blake’s books, Yang.  You know, the comic book collection that Blake denies exists, while claiming simutaneously that comic books are not art?”

    Weiss looked around at that. She had tried to dust Blake’s bookshelf earlier, but the Faunus girl had prevented her from doing so, stating—a little too awkwardly—that it was her books, so she would clean them.  However, unbeknownst to Blake, Weiss already knew quite well what she was trying to hide.  Blake wasn’t always in the dorm room, after all.  “Are we talking about Blake’s strange hentai again?”

    Blake put down her book, and decided that she was no longer going to be ashamed of her smut.  There were plenty of books in the Beacon Library that might qualify as such, and she had her rights as a citizen of Vale and Menagerie, dammit.  She sat up on her bed.  “First of all, those are not comic books.”  She pointed to one hanging off of Ruby’s bed.  “That is a comic book.  What I read are graphic novels.”  She put her nose in the air.  “Besides, my hentai isn’t all that strange.  You should read Nora’s.  My gods.  There’s things in there that make my skin crawl.”

    Weiss blinked.  “Um…what?”

    Blake abruptly realized she might have gone too far in her efforts to deflect her team’s attention.  Ruby was staring at her, Yang was hanging upside down from her bunk, and even Weiss, despite her shock, seemed interested.  “Er…I mean…”  There was only one thing to do when faced with this sort of dilemma.  Blake frantically reached under her pillow.  “Ninja vanish!”  Her hand came back empty.  The smoke bomb that was supposed to be there was gone.  Blake next realized that Weiss had made the beds that day, too.

   “We can still see you,” Ruby informed her.

    As Blake tried to think of what else to do—like leap out of a third-floor window and trust to Aura that she wouldn’t end up a bloody, broken heap—her problems compounded.  Jaune Arc, who had been strolling by, headed for his own dorm room, heard the words ‘hentai’ and ‘Nora.’  He stuck his head into their room.  “Wait, what? What do you mean, Blake? What do you mean Nora’s hentai stash is weirder than yours?”  Blake turned the same shade as Ruby’s cape.  Her team knowing about her secret stash of dirty comic books adult graphic novels was one thing; even Ruby could be trusted to be discreet.  Jaune was a bridge too far, though.

    Before Blake, Jaune, or the rest of Team RWBY could do anything more, Jaune was abruptly shoved into the latter’s dorm room, headfirst, where he crashed into Weiss, knocking them both down.  Nora Valkyrie strode angrily into the room, and leveled a finger at Blake.  “Don’t you dare kink-shame me, Blakey-Wakey!  You know as well as I do that I have nothing on Pyrrha’s stash!”  She nodded vociferously.  “Hell, we worship her stash together! I’ve been trying to get her to trade some of hers—“ She raised her voice and turned back towards Team JNPR’s dorm room  “—but she won’t do it, the prude!”

    Ruby took this to mean that, if Nora’s and Pyrrha’s stash of smut was worse and/or more extensive than Blake’s, then it stood to reason that Nora knew what yuri was.  “Hey, Nora? Yang was looking up something called yuri.  What do you know about it?” Yang purpled with rage and hurled a pillow at her sister.

    Jaune looked up from where he had landed; luckily, for his continued health and breathing, he had not landed between Weiss' legs, but to one side.  “Yuri? Hey, I love Mistrali food!”

    “They’re not talking about that, you dunce!” Weiss delivered a downward punch to Jaune’s head.

    “Ow! Weiss!”  Jaune scooted away from her, rubbing his head.  “But if it’s not the dish, then what is it?”

    “Yeah!” Ruby took the pillow off her face.  “What is it, Weiss?”

    “Oh, for…” Weiss blushed.  “Yuri is…well…er…i-it’s about g-girls loving girls.  Um…sexually.  Sometimes.  Most of the time.”

    Realization dawned on Jaune and Ruby’s faces.  “Oh, just like my sis Saphron and her wife Terra,” he said.

    “Yeah, like that,” Yang told him, then did a double take.  “Wait, your sister is a lesbian, Jaune?”

    Ruby chucked the pillow back at her sister.  “Or like you and Blake, Yang!”  Blake and Yang weren’t actually lovers—at least, not that Ruby knew of—but she couldn’t resist needling her sister a bit.

    “Dammit, shut up, Ruby!”  Yang caught the pillow out of midair.  Her expression turned sly.  “Or do you want me to tell everyone that you raid the dirty laundry hamper—you know, so you can sniff Weiss’ panties while getting your rocks off?”

    Ruby’s face became an odd mix of red (embarassment), purple (rage), and green (nausea).  “YANG!” Ruby screamed, stomping her foot.  “I can’t believe you just said that!”

    Weiss whirled and was on her feet in half a second.  “You do what to my what?”  She grabbed Ruby by the front of her shirt.  “What the actual hell, Ruby?!”

    Nora shrugged.  “I suppose now that the topic is out in the open, I have seen Pyr-Pyr doing the same with Jaune’s hoodie.”  She paused.  “And boxers.”

    Now it was Jaune who was on his feet with remarkable speed.  “She does what to my what?”

    The hammer thrower smirked.  “Come on, fearless leader.  Don’t tell me you didn’t notice what she wants to do to you since the moment you two met.”  Pyrrha had made Nora swear to secrecy on her feelings about Jaune, but Nora was tired of the constant denial of reality.  Besides, she also had a short span of attention.  “Hell, most of her hentai stash are commissions she got Velvet and Russel to do, where you have your way with her in many, many ways and kinks.”  She turned a little red herself.  “I’m not supposed to tell you that some might involve a female version of yourself, your sisters, and the whole team…along with Team RWBY.”  Nora ticked off the points on her fingers.  “Let’s see, there’s also one with a horse, a sloth, and even Zwei.”  That last part was distinctly untrue, but she was enjoying watching Jaune’s face turn various shades of colors and patterns.  “My favorite one is the one with the sloth, of course…wanted to ask Velvet how much she wanted to commission one with Ren…”

    “How…how in the hell…would I know any…anything like that?” Jaune stuttered.

    Nora rolled her eyes.  “Oh, come on, Jaune! Hentai aside, it’s not like Pyrrha’s ever fallen asleep in your bed, when you were in your bed, or ever came out of the shower wearing nothing but your jacket, because she ‘forgot’ her towel!”

    “She’s…she’s done that?” Jaune asked in shock.

    “Mmm-hmm.”  Nora took a triumphant stance, only to feel the presence of someone behind her.  Team RWBY and Jaune were staring at her with concern.  “She’s standing behind me, isn’t she.”

    “Yes, she is.”  The temperature in the room fell noticeably.  Pyrrha Nikos did not get angry often, but when she did, it was something to behold.  Metal objects began to rattle dangerously. 

   Nora, however, was nothing if not courageous.  She calmly turned and regarded her teammate.  “Kill me if you have to, Pyr.  Wad me up in whatever metal you can find, stab me with your spear, rip the iron out of my blood—“  Team RWBY took a step back, even those in their beds, at the thought that Pyrrha was capable of doing the latter  “—you totally did those things.”

    Pyrrha’s anger faltered.  “Um…I was cold the night I crawled into bed with Jaune…and I had my clothes on…” Nora raised an eyebrow, and the Invincible Girl of Mistral suddenly didn’t look so invincible.  “Okay…I was naked.  But it’s the best way to generate body heat!”

    “You did what to what?” Jaune repeated, then he nearly fell.  “I thought…I thought that was a dream…”

    “And the part about the jacket?” Nora pressed.

    “No! I didn’t do that! I didn’t—“ Now it was Pyrrha who was wilting.  “I mean…I…um…”

    “She did do that,” Ren helpfully added, from JNPR’s room.

    The rooms were silent, as Pyrrha looked befuddled, Nora looked satisfied, and Team RWBY looked like they were still a few paragraphs back.  Jaune got to his feet, and took a startled Pyrrha’s hands in his.  “Pyrrha…why didn’t you tell me how you feel about me?”

     She looked down.  “I’m sorry, Jaune, but…I really wanted to, but I always got afraid about how you would react.  Will you forgive me?”

    Jaune smiled.  “Pyrrha…there’s nothing to forgive.  I’m the one who should ask for that.  I’ve spent all this time chasing after Weiss—“

    “Fruitlessly,” Weiss interrupted.

    “—and I didn’t ever notice how you feel about me.”  To everyone’s shock, Jaune knelt in front of Pyrrha, still holding her right hand.  “Pyrrha Nikos?”

    “Y-Yes?” she stammered. 

    “Will you let this fool go out with you?  To have a meaningful relationship with, and maybe devolve into wanton, mindless debauchery, that will result in having more children than my parents?”

    Pyrrha sniffled and began to cry.  She fell to her knees, still holding Jaune’s hand.  “Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!” she shouted, like a demented and better looking Daniel Bryan.  “I want to, Jaune! I’ll even marry you right now, so nobody can stop us and fulfill our sinful dreams!”  She paused.  “Um…and the regular ones, too.” 

    Nora began to clap.  “Congratulations!” she exclaimed.

    Team RWBY began to clap as well.  “Congratulations!” they cheered


   Pyrrha felt a pair of strong arms encircle her from behind, and lips nuzzle her neck.  “That’s not how it happened,” Jaune said.  He sat behind her, his legs on either side of hers, the soft blond hairs tickling her smooth thighs.

    She smiled happily, looking up from where she had been writing on her Scroll.  “No…it’s not.”  She turned around and kissed him.  “But it’s a lot better than almost dying at Cinder Fall’s hand, being saved at the very last minute by Ruby, and waking up in the hospital.” 

   Jaune kissed her neck.  “Very true.”  He read over her shoulder again.  “So what would happen next?”

   “Oh, I don’t know…probably Nora admit to Ren that she finally wanted to be together-together with him—“

    “They probably already were,” Jaune said.  “I know of at least twice I saw a sock on the door of our dorm room.”

    “Yes, but this would be more dramatic.”  Pyrrha laughed.  “And Weiss would go all dominatrix on Ruby for her panty raid habits.”

    Jaune snorted.  “Pretty sure that Ruby never sniffed Weiss’ panties.  That’s kind of gross.”

    “And I never sniffed your boxers.  Ew.”  She grinned at him.  “But I did sniff your jacket, and wear only it coming out of the shower.  It smelled like you.”  She kissed his nose.  “And I love you, Jaune.”

    “I love you, Pyrrha.”  Jaune pressed himself closer to her in the bed.

    “Oh? What’s that poking me in my behind, Mr. Arc?”

    “What do you think it is, Mrs. Arc?”

    Pyrrha set down her Scroll and turned around.  Neither wore a thing, but two people happily married often ended up like that.  She looked down.  “Well.  It appears to be long, hard…” She licked his cheek.  “…and all mine.”

    “Shall we get to that debauchery you wrote about?” Jaune grinned as she straddled him.

    “Oh, let’s!”