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You're supposed to be smart.

Chapter Text

The teacher in front was busy writing important details about today’s lesson on the board, his voice echoing on the four wall of the class.

From the left side sat Louis Tomlinson, class achiever, number one nerd in the whole school and completely antisocial who was writing everything his teacher was saying at precise speed, not even bothering to fix his glasses, which was slowly falling from his nose and right next to him was Harry Styles, public enemy number one and Louis’ best friend who was buried on his books, snoring loudly but was completely ignored by the whole class. They were used to him sleeping and the teacher gave up trying to wake him up, a month long detention did nothing to make him more attentive in class.

The bell rang signaling the end of another boring yet tiring class in school... for other students of course but for Louis, it was another day of stocking up random bits and pieces of knowledge that his teacher was lecturing about in his head.

‘I probably need to review my notes again tonight.’ He thought nervously as he chewed on the inside of his cheek.

Louis Tomlinson grew up believing that if you want to have the perfect future, first you must be number one at absolutely everything, and second… well there is in fact no second. His family believed that either you be number one or nothing. It was hard and it was cruel but he learned to live with it.

He gave Harry’s head a few tap to wake him up; he stirred in his sleep and wiped a few drools that escaped his lips. Louis just rolled his eyes and continued packing his things.

“Hey Haz, do you want to go to the library and finish our homework in English?” Louis asked as he neatly placed all his notes that he took during his teacher’s lecture inside his bag.

After making sure that everything was in place, he lifted his gaze to look at Harry who just gave him an incredulous look, a look which questions Louis’ sanity.

Harry was Louis’ friend… his first ever friend besides Niall who was everybody’s friend and his next door neighbor and he can also be considered as one of Louis’ friends if you count walking silently next to Niall as he blabbers on continuously about the most random of things like the frog he saw in his bedroom. Niall was nice though. There were also a few who’s Louis is close with after the dreaded first year where he was considered a prey to the bullies but after he met Harry, no one bothered him and others seemed to like him and befriended him. Every year his confidence grew, all thanks to Harry of course.

“Lou, it’s Friday and that homework is not due until Tuesday.” Harry replied with a groan.

Harry wasn't really a fan of studying, if it wasn't for Louis attending this class he wouldn't even bother showing up.

Louis nodded sadly and decided to just stare at his feet wondering if he could just do it at home after school, not before reviewing his notes from today’s lectures.

Harry knew he was a goner after seeing the defeated look on Louis’ face.

‘The things I do for this boy, I swear.’ Harry thought to himself.

“Ugh fine, just don’t give that sad look, you know it makes me feel like the shittiest person.” Harry huffed, exasperated.

Louis lifted his gaze away from his toes to smile at Harry and giving him a quick hug. That alone made Harry feel great about himself.

“Thank you Haz!” he cheered as he scrambled to pull Harry’s hand, dragging him out of class.

Harry and Louis were complete opposites, while Louis would prefer reading at the farthest corner of the library Harry would choose to go out and party. Harry wasn't exactly a party animal, he was actually very mysterious and scary when Louis first met him lingering at the library, sitting on the floor with a bloodied nose and busted lip. Louis remembered panicking and almost fainting at the sight of blood on his shirt but Harry just grinned at him and introduced himself. He also asked for Louis help if he could get him a pair of clean shirt and some antiseptic because the school principal can’t see him looking like that or he’ll get into trouble. Louis knew him of course, he’d heard all about the troublemaker Harry Styles, he was already two years older than his classmates after getting into tons of trouble and getting into different sorts of danger that managed to get him kicked out of school and now that he has transferred to Louis’ school, it seems he was starting yet again another trouble but trying to not get caught. Louis didn't want to get involve in Harry Styles’ chaos but his green alluring eyes were doing things to him that made him agree to help.

Louis embarrassingly gave Harry the spare shirt he had on his bag and his own personal first aid kit and when Harry asked him why he had those he kept quiet. Harry soon realized the reason why Louis brought those stuffs in school when he saw some big kids pushing Louis like he was some kind of doll for them to just pass around, his shirt was dirty and like Harry was before he was all bruised up and tears were gathering up in his eyes as he begged them to stop. Harry didn't take the bullying very easy so that day he ended up with a black eye, a broken arm and a new friend. No one bothered Louis after that incident especially when everyone in school feared Harry. That was Louis and Harry’s freshmen year and now they were both seniors, a few months from graduating and still close as ever.

They were the best of friends, Harry groaned when Louis said that out loud but he was smiling after seeing Louis so giddy and excited about having a friend. Harry didn't mind when Louis made him a personalized bracelet, he still wears it every day, he also didn't mind if Louis would always drag him to his study session that he had no interest in participating but he would never leave Louis to study alone. He got used to sleeping in the library anyway.

And if you ask him, he would probably follow Louis everywhere without complain.





After school, Louis went straight home and for the thousandth time declined Harry’s offer to go to a party because he really didn't think his mom would approve. Harry of course, for the millionth time understood and made sure to walk Louis home to make sure he was safe.

 When Louis opened the door, he was already greeted by his mom who was schooling a very stern face.

“And why are you late Louis?” she asked, irritation clear on her voice.

“Me and Harry lost track of time, we were at the library doing homework.” He answered her while he fiddled nervously at his fingers.

“Louis, I've told you not to hang with that boy, why are you still with him.” Her mom asked again clearly mad about how her son wasn't following her.

Louis wanted to roll his eyes but knew he would get reprimanded by it and he was pretty tired and would rather take a few minutes of nap before getting back to his notes.

His parents didn't like Harry, not one bit. They knew he was bad news for their son and would ruin their plans for his future but their son never did stay away from said bad influence. Although Louis didn't understand why they thought Harry was some spawn of the devil when he’s exactly the opposite. He helped Louis’ confidence and protected him always from those kids who like to make fun of him just because he prefers a night of studying rather than partying.

Harry never minded Louis’ obsession with being on top and getting the highest grade possible, in fact he was always there to support him so why can’t his parents accept that Harry would always be Louis’ best friend. His parents were so cruel sometimes, it was their fault why their son never had a lot of friend to begin with, they've brainwashed him into thinking that he’ll never amount to anything if he wasn't on top.

It’s not like he hated it, he was actually very happy especially at times where Harry would cheer and congratulate him when he gets a perfects grade on his test or won a contest, Louis loves making Harry proud. All of this wasn't to make his parents happy about their perfect son; this was all about making Harry, his best friend proud and hopefully encourages him to do well in school.

Harry’s interaction with Louis helped him pass a few class even if he manages to piss a few teachers off. They were very much thankful for Louis’ influence to Harry and how they believed that he was leading him to the right path.

So even if everyone believed that their friendship was odd and a bit cliche, they surprisingly were both good for each other. Harry was a burst of confidence for Louis while Louis was a good influence to Harry.

Louis vowed to never end his friendship with Harry even if he receives a ton full of lecture from his parents every time he gets home. He might be scared shitless at the thought of angering his mother or father but no way in hell would he let them ruin it.

'Not happening mom.' he whispered to himself as his mother continues on her rant about proper friends.






Chapter Text

The music was blaring rather loudly from the speaker and Harry was having a hard time making his way to where the free booze was. He was at a random party that was being hosted by god knows who and he didn’t even care to know. There was already the chances he’d get pissed drunk and hangover till Sunday and the thought worried him a little because he remembers Louis asking him if he would want to come to the mall to buy some textbooks at the bookstore.

If you’ve seen Harry before and knew him even, you’d laugh and think that he was crazy because Harry Styles doesn’t go to the mall, bookstores even and he wouldn’t even care at anyone’s feelings about being disappointed if he cancelled. He’s just not that kind of person.

But ever since that day he saw Louis with tear filled eyes, he swore to never be the reason of disappointing or even upsetting him. It was all bizarre and out of Harry’s domain, he was used to alcohol, and drugs and sex but the past years have lessened his unusual out of control escapades. He spent most of his free time with Louis at the library; he would cancel all his plans to just be there to support Louis when he’s their school participant at an essay writing contest or some other academic related shenanigans that other school comes up.

Harry knows the looks he usually received when he’s seated at the front of the stage, biting his fingers anxiously when a question was asked, it feels like he’s the one being asked and not Louis who was nervously squeaking his answers because even if Louis did join a ton of contest and won them, the thought of being on stage still frightens him. Harry ignored the hushed whispers or comment about what a delinquent was doing at places like this, he would have talked back or scared them but he knew if he did, he would get kicked out and would make Louis more nervous and probably lose focus making him lose so he just bit his tongue to keep all the negative comments to himself.

Louis always needed Harry; one glance from him would calm him down and answer a question he already knew beforehand.

Harry feels an extremely amount of pride at knowing he was the person Louis gets his confidence from but would also feel it deflating when Louis would utter the two cursed words that would probably end Harry.

Best Friend.

That was the only thing Louis sees from him, a friend, a companion, a good luck charm and nothing else.

Harry already knew from the day Louis gave him a personalized bracelet that he was gone for the boy, no questions asked. Seeing as he was already bisexual and accepted himself at the young age of 13, he no longer questions his feelings.

The main problem was Louis, Harry didn’t even know if Louis likes the same gender. Louis came from thick headed parents who were horrible and Harry wants to punch them sometimes but he isn’t allowed at the Tomlinson residence for being such a bad influence on their son.

Harry hopes though, he hopes that Louis feels a little bit of something for him but he knew Louis didn’t even know Harry’s own feelings which is odd because every person from a mile radius already know that Harry was head over heels in love. He would go at all cost to protect and make Louis happy and all Louis can see was the care of a loving best mate, best fucking mate.

Harry deserves an award really, and probably a lot of booze too.

“Fuck it.” He muttered to himself as grabbed a bottle of vodka from an unknown stranger and made his way to the dance floor, he grabbed a random brunette and imagined that he was dancing with Louis instead of a nameless drunk.

‘He’s not small enough.’

‘He doesn’t smell like Louis.’

‘His eyes aren’t as pretty as Louis.’

Harry managed to dance at every brunette at the party but still can’t find one who is remotely similar to his Louis.

“I know what you are doing?” a voice grumbled from behind where Harry was grinding at a boy who was wearing glasses similar to Louis.

Harry knew he was feeling a little bit tipsy; actually he’s probably drunk when a fleeting thought came from his mind about getting this boy in glasses to bed. But the person talking to Harry has caught his attention and he was pushing the boy away because Harry knew that voice.

“Zaynnnn.” He slurred drunkenly.

Harry thought he was about to fall face first on the floor when he swayed drunkenly to hug Zayn, good think Zayn seems to be the only sober person on the party so he was able to help Harry back on his feet.

Zayn was one of Louis’ few friends. He was a transfer when Louis and Harry where at their second year and was paired to be Louis lab partner. Harry hated Zayn at first though because at how fast Louis got comfortable with him, he didn’t like anyone stealing Louis attention. They were supposed to be for Harry only.

But Zayn made it clear when Harry cornered him one time that Louis was just a friend and they were both just really addicted to Marvel comics that’s why they talk a lot. Also, Liam found them and punched Harry in the face. Liam Payne, school’s perfect poster boy was Zayn’s boyfriend and he can land a very good punch. Of course Louis would come at the right moment and saw Harry unconscious with a panicking Liam and Zayn, they all became officially friends at the hospital when Harry was getting treated for a mild concussion.

Harry was annoyed at first though, not because of the new addition to their group but because Zayn and Liam were one of those couples who would show their undying love to each other in public and that makes Harry jealous because he can’t do the same with Louis. Louis doesn’t have a problem though so it gives Harry more hope of being together with Louis. He didn’t know what to do if Louis turned out to be homophobic.

“You`re drunk as fuck Harry.” Zayn said annoyed as he dragged Harry to a more secluded room where no one was groping his ass.

Zayn took Harry to room and he expects a drunken couple having sex but the room was tidy, no drunk passed out anywhere. Harry was confused.

“You’re in my shared apartment Harry, my roommate’s the one hosting the party and this is my room. It’s off limits.” He said as he helped Harry lie down on his bed.

He gave Harry a bottle of water to help him sober up a little and not puke on his room.

“I thought you and Liam were living together.” Harry said after finishing the whole bottle.

“That’s not until next month, I still need a few more days to endure all this out of the blue party and then I’ll be on my Liam’s arms.” Zayn stated proudly after letting out a dreamy sigh.

Harry scowled at Zayn, he hated being reminded how Zayn and Liam had the perfect relationship while he was stuck pinning for a very oblivious and stupid but smart idiot. It was safe to say that he was indeed bitter.

“You can’t just blame this all on Lou right?” Zayn then said after a moment of silence.

He was standing in front of Harry, his arms crossed and he was expecting for an explanation. Like many others, Zayn knew Harry’s feelings for his nerd of a friend Louis. Louis was one of the smartest person Zayn knew in his entire life in existent but is extremely oblivious when it comes to noticing his best friends feelings, stupid even.

Harry decided to ignore Zayn lecture and just closed his eyes, praying that he wasn’t too hangover for his and Louis’ trip to the mall.

Harry thought Zayn already decided to stop talking and just let him sleep but he was wrong and he hated him for being so damn deep and mysterious all the time. He doesn’t usually talk and if he did, it’s all about how perfect Liam is and when it’s not about worshipping his boyfriend, the things he says are sometimes confusing but means a lot when you realize its true meaning.

“Harry, you know damn well that you can’t be Louis’ best mate forever. You wouldn’t survive if Louis met someone, someone who has the ball to ask him out and what if Louis said yes? He came from an upbringing where love is nowhere to be found, just responsibility. How do you not know if Louis mistaken your love as a responsibility? I know you care so much for him and I am in awe of you but you have to do something before someone takes your place?”

Harry has unconsciously fisted his hair, imaging Louis with some random girl or even boy? He didn’t know what could hurt more? Louis being straight or Louis picking some random bloke that’s not Harry.

“Love is not something that’s taught, you have to make him feel it, believe it. It would take some time but it’ll be worth it in the end. “ Zayn continues.

Harry’s thought changes then; he then imagines him and Louis together, holding hands. They’ve been on a tons of dates, at the carnival, at an ice skating rink, Louis holding Harry’s hand tightly as he fights to stay balanced and not fall on his bum, Harry holding his hand and smiling when Louis would take some courage and let go but falling instantly, Harry cooing and helping him out, kissing his forehead and they would laugh and ski together like any other couple out there.

They were all tempting but Harry knew there would always be a cost.

Harry was scared of not being good enough for Louis, he knew Louis was incredible and beyond him. He was smart and would achieve a lot of things, Harry was afraid that Louis’ parent was right and he would lead Louis to the wrong path. He didn’t want to hold Louis down and keep him from reaching his potentials.

They were almost graduating and Louis always dreamed to go to the best university that Harry knew he can’t get pass into even if he tried.

They would soon be separated and Harry didn’t like the idea of Louis choosing between his dreams or him.

“The world you say and dream is beautiful Zayn but you know that there’s going to be a lot at stakes. Life always try to ruin things and take those away from me and Louis would soon be one of them and then I’ll be alone again to fend for myself. I’d rather let myself hurt than take Louis with me.” He murmured as he curled himself on Zayn’s bed, wishing that sleep would come and take him.




Chapter Text



Louis was glancing at his phone every minute that passed, his foot tapping anxiously at the pavement as he looked from left to right, waiting for a curly haired boy to arrive. He was waiting at a nearby park when he and Harry had an agreement to meet. He had asked Harry to accompany him at the bookstore to purchase some books that he would like to read and he would have letting Harry pick him up from his house if only his parents were at work, they both had the day off and he only sneaked out of his house because he knew they wouldn't let him out if they found out that he’ll be spending his day with Harry.

But Harry was yet to arrive and he getting really worried and nervous. Nervous because Harry hasn't texted him at all, what if he forgot or decided to ignore Louis. Did he do something wrong? Is he annoying Harry or did Harry think that he was so pathetic that he can’t even go to the store and buy his textbooks himself.

If that was the case, he would feel really bad for dragging Harry to his boring and introverted life. Louis was even surprised Harry had lasted that long trying to act as if Louis was his best friend, maybe he got tired of trying to scare all the bully that ruined he’s life before and would just let him be.

He suddenly had this strong urge to cry and run home but his legs felt stuck as if it was nailed to the ground. He was always reminded not only by the whispers at school or the rumors around town that Harry wasn't the type to stick around with people especially nerdy boys who didn't have a life. Maybe they were true, maybe he was just nothing but a charity case to Harry. But three years of Harry trying to pretend as if he wants to be Louis’ friend was kind of strange.

And now what was supposed to be a great day at the mall turned into some kind of depression for Louis because he thinks Harry didn't want to be friends with him anymore because he was such a loser. He can’t even accompany Harry from one of his parties because he was so scared while Harry would agree to study with him all the time even if he didn't like it. Maybe that’s why Harry didn't want to be friends with him, because Louis was being an unfair friend. Harry needed a friend who would support him, he deserves it more than anyone and surely he didn't deserve Louis.

He started sniffing; he lifted his feet off the ground and rested his head on his knees. He knew he looked horrible and childish but he believes that he had lost his best friend so he does have a reason to mourn.

Louis didn't know how long he was in that position but after a moment passed, there was footsteps and then he felt a nearby presence but thought it was just some old woman who was about to feed the birds but it suddenly spoke and it was familiar to him.


Eyes red and puffy, Louis raised his head to confirm his suspicion and let out a big sigh of relief at the sight of Harry. He was wearing a worn out beanie on his head and a pair of dark shades covering his eyes and his usual black tee and ripped jeans.

And he showed how relieved he was by standing from the bench he was sitting and quickly jumping on Harry. Harry didn't really know what was happening but he was quick to catch Louis with no trouble at all because of how small he was compared to Harry. Deep inside Harry was very much happy at the height difference, safe to say it has been a subject of Harry’s not so clean thoughts when he was alone in bed.

Harry blushed at the R-rated things that he was starting to think, his also thought it was a good time to make an appearance when Louis was pressed tightly on his chest. He was young and hormones are a bitch, sue him.

But then he felt it, his neck was suddenly wet and he can hear Louis’ little sniffles and he was quick to gently pry Louis arms away from his back and a thousand of questions running from his head about why Louis was crying.

“Why are you crying! Are you ok!?” he asked in alarm.

He looked around the park in search of a potential person that was the reason for his Louis’ tears and he was ready to go to prison again if it means making that person pay. Harry was still a little worn out having experience the effect of his drinking, he still had a massive headache and woke up late, he haven’t even took the time to take a shower because he was late and he didn't want to make Louis wait any longer. To add on Harry’s misfortune, he left his phone at Zayn’s room and still hasn't retrieved it so he didn't notify Louis’ earlier about his tardiness.

“I’m fine Harry, ‘m just being a baby.”

“Did anyone do this to you? I will hurt them!” Harry said, not completely hearing Louis’ earlier reply.

Harry was even more terrified when Louis suddenly burst into fits of giggles which would be so damn adorable if Harry didn't know he was crying just seconds ago.

“Did you hit your head? Have you got any brain damage? Is that the reason your mood is worse that a teenage girl on her period?” he asked, pulling Louis closer to check for an bruise or bump on his head which could be the only explanation to his bipolar mood change.

Louis just pushed him away and smiled at him.

“I’m really fine Harry, I was just being my weird self and ..” Louis suddenly paused from his talking, looking down on his feet as he blushed 50 shades of red.

That didn't stop Harry from worrying more, thinking that Louis was going red because he suddenly caught a fever.

“Harry, am I just a charity case to you?” Louis quickly asked while his gaze was still focused on the ground, avoiding all sort of eye contact with Harry.

Harry just opened and closed his mouth like a fish, unable to form a decent enough reply for Louis.

Harry knew how wild Louis’ imagination can be and he was really insecure and sometimes doubted everything as long as he gets the time to think about everything except his studies. Harry didn't really think that a few hours late from their meeting would get Louis to think that Harry was too good for him.

‘Maybe Zayn was right.’ Harry frowned when Louis started fiddling with his fingers, a habit he knew Louis did if he was really uncomfortable and would like to leave but is too nice and worries about being rude. ‘Maybe Louis does think that he’s my responsibility.’

Harry was just about to explain himself when Louis started stuttering which he knew he never did unless he’s about to lose it and cry.

“Y-you don’t have to answer, I understand that I’m a bad friend and a loser and you’re too cool for me and –“

“Shut up Louis.” Harry hissed.

Harry cursed himself when Louis did stayed quiet and was now staring at him wide eyed and scared. He didn't mean to snap or even frighten Louis like that, he was just too tired and sleep deprived from vomiting all night and not having enough sleep that he was getting reckless, Louis saying that he was a loser and a bad friend was also not helping Harry’s temper. He never ever snaps at Louis so he understood the unbelievable look he was getting from him.

“Lou I’m sorry.”

He didn't respond but Harry can see he was shaking.

“I didn't mean to snap, I just had a tough weekend and the reason why I was late is because I’m still hangover and I left my phone at Zayn’s apartment so I couldn't call you and please.” He lifted Louis face with his fingers so they were eye to eye. “You are not a charity case, why would you even think that. You’re my best friend right?”

Harry internally winced at that word; he was also trying to ignore the voices in his head which were shouting at him to kiss Louis because this was the perfect opportunity.

He wouldn't do it to Louis; he wasn't going to force himself on him.

I might scare him away.’

Harry saw Louis’ face brighten, literally glowed like the fucking sun as if he was super happy and Harry’s heart hurts a little at how badly he wants to make him smile like that every fucking day.

“You’re my best friend too Harry!” Louis cheered, all recent mood swings gone, he was just so happy while Harry felt like being punched in the gut.





Harry and Louis were on their way to the bookstore, Louis chatting happily at Harry as if his recent breakdown didn't happen before.

Harry was also happy for him but he head was still being such a massive pain and he would sometimes make a few stops to try to lessen in at a little. Louis hasn't noticed it before but after the last stop he suddenly understood.

“Oh no, I totally forgot about your hangover. Maybe we should just go home so you can take a rest. We can but my books any other time when you’re feeling fine.” He said worriedly.

Harry cursed the damn party for making Harry go and giving him a hangover that worried Louis. He forced a smile despite his dizzying state.

“I’m fine, we’re almost there anyway and you've been talking all week about getting that book.”

“But your health is more important than that, those books were just addition to the research I’m working on and besides I can still buy them next week.” He explained.

If Harry wasn't particularly pail, he would have blushed at Louis statement and his concern. He shook his head and forced himself to stand straight.

“That’s not going to happen, so how about we just go so you can go back to your research. I wouldn't let myself live if I knew I’m stopping you from inventing a cure for cancer.” He joked, trying to lighten up and not worry Louis more than he already is.

Louis was quiet for a moment; Harry thought it was because of his joke so he was quick to defend himself. “It can be any research, not just for cancer.”

“Do you really think I’d be a good doctor?” Louis asked instead.

This was the first time Louis opened up a topic about his future career, usually he would steer the subject away or even ignore the question if it was asked because even if he had his future college all planned out, and he never did mention what he’ll study. Harry always thought he was just undecided but Louis really seemed curious.

“I think you’ll be the best at everything you do but a doctor seemed more logical because you’re so fascinated with all those science stuff and you love helping people.” He answered truthfully.

Louis blushed and smiled at him but it quickly faded once he spoke. “My dad thinks I should study law.”

Harry knew he had disbelief written all over his face but he can’t imagine Louis, standing in a courtroom making mean and vicious comments. No, Louis is far better off caring for children and making sure they’re not sick.

“I hate to say this but your dad is stupid, you’re not made to be evil and malicious or even mean and not to be rude, you hated the spotlight and lawyers tend to be in one a lot.”

Louis’ face was grim and Harry almost took everything back because it surely done it this time, upsetting Louis more. He was in a roll and he wanted to bang his head on the wall and before he can actually do it Louis continued speaking.

“I don’t like law; I wanted to be a doctor.” He stated firmly.

Harry smiled and was feeling so damn proud of his boy. “Yes you will, to hell with what your dad wants. Go for what your heart truly desires.”

“You’re becoming a sap, stop hanging out with Zayn.” He giggled on his hand.

Harry grinned and felt 100x better at making Louis feel happy, hangover can go and suck itself because Louis is his very own cure.

Chapter Text





Harry hated his class when Louis wasn't in them. It was just so boring and everyone annoys him so much especially Mathew.

Mathew didn't do anything wrong with him, he was actually very scared of Harry. He was the captain of the math team and was always paired with Louis during competitions and Louis looks up to him so much and Harry didn't like it. He also notices how Mathew would blush or stutter whenever Louis would talk to him, it’s annoying more than it’s endearing.

But like many other instances, Louis, being the adorable oblivious being that he is seems to not notice Mathew’s little crush on him. Harry wasn't sure if he was happy or mad about it. Happy because then Harry would know that Mathew’s advances are shut down and angry because it seems Louis really is so oblivious when it comes to people and their feelings, the only thing which explains how Harry’s intention aren't clearly understood when anyone in a 5 mile radius can see how Harry looks at Louis like he hangs the fucking moon.

So Harry was feeling a little bit of both.

When school bell rang, Harry was already up on his seat and leaving the class before his teacher can actually dismiss everyone. He walked straight to the cafeteria since he and Louis had lunch next and he spotted him along with Zayn, Liam and Niall who Harry still doesn't know where he suddenly popped out of and started hanging with them but he didn't have a problem with it. Niall seems to know every party in town and Harry likes his accent which is Irish.

Louis was the first to spot him and he waved, shyly, always shyly and Harry is so fucking endeared.

But before he can walk straight to where the others were, someone magically appeared in front of him and he was surprised to see Mathew. The boy was red in the face and seems to be sweating so much his shirt was drenched.

“Uh what are you doing?” Harry asked when Mathew didn't step away.

He seems to be struggling to make a reply and Harry would have helped the poor bloke and left but decided to stay to find out what he suddenly wants. “U-uh hi Harry, um, I was just… uh, you know – can I talk to you for a moment?”

Harry raised an eyebrow that made Mathew shrink further and blush harder if it was possible. Like seriously, what is his problem?

Harry did feel a little bit of pity because no boy he knew could turn red like that and he looks like he’s about to pass out any second. “Sure.” He said gesturing for him to follow because no way would Harry let him lead him around to god knows where.

When they were at a relatively quiet place since everyone seems to be all occupied with their food, he turns to Mathews and waited for him to talk.

Harry wasn't sure if every smart person in their school has to be shy and scared like they may be physically weak but they’re powerful, other people should learn a thing or two about taking school seriously and yet it all seems they’re too afraid of everything…or is it just Harry they’re afraid of? Did Louis see him like that? Is he scared of him? Surely he’s not right?

Stop thinking Harry.’ He scolded himself and went back to Mathews.

But it’s been minutes and he’s feeling kind of hungry so he wants to hurry whatever this was so he can be with Louis and his food.

“Are you going to talk or what? I still need to eat.” He grumbled which made Mathew step back a little but he nodded and spoke.

“Um, well you see I know you and Louis are close, actually everyone does-.” He paused to breathe, Harry was staring intently, almost deadly because he knew where this turn of conversation is heading into and Mathew should choose his words wisely or things could get ugly.

“And you’re his best friend so I was wondering if you could help me out with uh… asking him out?” he finished.

Harry wasn't one to keep his chill or control, he’s actually very useless when it comes with it and he knew he would've punched Mathew straight on the face if it wasn't for the hand that appeared to tightly grasp his shirt and he turned around to see Louis staring at Mathew in shock.

Harry stared wide eyed at Louis and then back to Mathew who seems as surprised as I was.

“Y-you want to ask me out?” Louis whispered disbelievingly to Mathew.

Harry didn't understand why Louis would act so shock about anyone liking him or giving him any type of interest. Harry knew a lot of people who would date Louis but they all seem to avoid him because Harry would threatened them usually or glare at them until they pissed their pants.

But Mathew seemed harmless to Harry that’s why he didn't do any of those, he seemed to shit his pant whenever Louis talks to him so Harry never worried of him actually growing some balls and asking Harry himself for Louis, the size of this man’s balls are enormous.

 And then Mathew seems to grow another pair because he was completely ignoring Harry and turning his attention to Louis.

“Yes, Um, I just thought I should ask Harry first. Not that I’m scared but I think I should get his blessing first because you two have been so close since freshmen year.”

It seems smart people are in fact really stupid because Mathew just signed his own death and Harry never felt so angry about something that he was seeing red and feeling pure animalistic jealousy. But all anger and jealousy disappeared and was replaced was with deep pain and anguish when Louis agreed.

“I-I would love to.”

Harry didn't know if he can take this all so he stepped away, leaving the two alone before he scares Louis by killing Mathew on that very same spot.

He didn't go to the cafeteria; he went to the back of the school which was prohibited and off limits to all students but to hell with it. Harry felt so hurt and he didn't know how to handle it.

Louis agreed to go on a date, yes, it’s just a date but he didn't really know Louis would actually go. If Harry was the one who asked him out, would he say yes? Will he be that eager to come or will he deny Harry? Everything was confusing him and he accidentally punched a nearby tree.

Pain exploded on his hand but it wasn't as painful as what his heart was currently feeling.

“I knew you’d be here.”

Harry didn't turn to face Zayn.

“Leave me alone Zayn, I’m not in the mood to deal with your cryptic nonsense.” He grumbled as he tied his headband on his bleeding knuckles.

“Louis just came to the cafeteria after following both you and Mathew, he told us that Mathew asked him out and they’ll be going on a date this Saturday and you didn't return. You got Louis all worried because you haven’t eaten yet, the poor boys been looking at you.”

Harry didn't know if what saddens him more, Louis and Mathew going on a date this Saturday or Louis being worried about him, he doesn't like worrying Louis. He wants him to smile and be happy and what if going out with Mathew would make him happy? What the fuck would Harry do then?

He felt Zayn’s hand on his shoulder and he didn't shake it off. As much as he hated Zayn’s awful yet smart words that manages to dig right through Harry’s head, he was still always there for him and he wouldn't admit it, but he was glad he had someone who cared for him besides Louis.

“I don’t want to be the one to say that I told you so, I think you already know what I’m on about but hurting yourself or hiding away from Louis wouldn't solve a thing. Let’s just go back and clean your hands before it gets infected and not give Louis a heart attack.” He explained slowly.

Harry really hated how right Zayn always was, one day he’ll get wrong and Harry wouldn't let him forget it but he has a point, everything he’s doing right now will never be the answer to his problems.

“Ok.” He sighed and let Zayn guide him to where Louis was nervously pacing.

When Louis found them, he ran and hugged Harry, Harry didn't even had the chance to speak because Louis was hugging him tight. Harry let out a hiss when his hand was crushed between them which made Louis pull away.

“Oh my god Harry! What happened to your arm?” he panicked as he saw the state of his blood covered bandanna wrapped around his knuckles.

“It’s nothing, just slipped.” He explained.

He didn't want Louis finding out that he did it to himself, it would just worry him more and possibly blame himself for it and Harry didn't want that.

“We should go to the nurse and let her check on it, if you managed to break it or not!”

He dragged Harry to the nurse not even giving him a say to the matter. Zayn, Liam and Niall who seems to be there at first have disappeared and went back to the cafeteria. Harry knew Zayn was behind it, Zayn was a good friend but he’s an asshole for leaving Louis and Harry alone.

Harry still doesn't know the emotional state he has in, he didn't want a repeat of last time where he accidentally snapped at Louis.

But surprisingly, Louis was quiet on the way to the nurse and when the nurse finished bandaging Harry’s hand, she too left them alone in the school clinic.

Harry knew the silence around them wasn't awkward, he can actually feel the wave of worry coming out of Louis.

“It’s not your fault you know, I can be clumsy too?” he said to make Louis stop thinking.

Louis just nodded and bit his lip.

“You know slipping doesn't usually result to a bleeding hand, maybe you’ll break your wrist but that’s a lot of blood and can only be required if the force done to it was intentional, like punching something out of anger.” Louis added which made Harry curse to himself.

Why did he ever believe that he could lie to Louis when it comes to things like this, he’s a future doctor for god sake of course he wouldn't be fooled.

He tore his gaze away from Louis to stare at the wall who seems very interesting all of the sudden. “I’m sorry, I just got carried away.” He murmured instead.

There was again silence before Louis spoke again. “Is it because of Mathew asking me out?” he asked softly.

Harry’s heart gave a sudden leap, what was he going to say? Is this really the right time to do all the lovey dovey shit, is this really the place Harry would finally grew a pair like what Mathew did and say everything that he feels for him? And Louis noticed, he noticed Harry’s little outburst, maybe he finally had an idea of how Harry feels?

“Are you worried I would spend less time with you because of Mathew? Is that what you’re worried about?” Louis added.

Harry is so done right now, Louis is lucky he’s so damn cute.



Chapter Text



Harry found out that Mathew and Louis’ date was set on Saturday, Niall told him when he was sulking in yet another class without Louis. Niall should have chosen a better time to share that information because Harry didn't have it in him to stop himself from flipping out.

“Hey harry, did Louis tell you about his date?” Niall asked.

Harry just gave him a nod and tightened his hold on his pen.

“Is he already broadcasting it to the whole damn school?” Harry had a reason to be sarcastic alright.

“Nah, he just told me earlier, Mathew seems a pretty good guy but I don’t think he and Louis would work.” Niall continued to babble ignoring the glare that their teacher sent him in front.

Harry knew Niall didn't know his feelings for Louis and he was relieve because Niall really didn't know how to keep anything to himself, he might accidentally tell Louis if he knew and that’s probably not the best way for Louis to know about how Harry thinks of him.

As Niall kept talking, Harry tried to block him out but then he spoke something that kept ringing on his ears

“Did you know that it’s set on Saturday?”


And then he stood up and slammed his hand on his table.

The good news was, he wasn't expelled…yet but he did receive a few hours in detention for breaking school property, it was his poor chair, it wasn't Harry’s fault that it was an old chair and can’t handle a few teenage tantrums.

He was sent straight to the principal office by an angry and frightened teacher, poor Mrs. Samuels because her heart can’t seriously handle a bitter brokenhearted boy breaking chairs in her class. Harry didn't even stay and argue because he was so pissed he could have punched Niall which would be a bad thing because Niall was really nice to Louis and he was his friend. He didn't want Louis questioning Niall on how he got punched in the face, Harry didn't want to come out as bitter and jealous which he actually is.

On his way to the principal’s office, all he can think about was the hundreds of ways to break Mathew’s bone ‘accidentally’ because he was still on probation and one more assault then he’ll go back to community service.

Louis once told him that bottling all his anger and hatred isn't healthy, that’s why Louis enrolled him into some boxing classes because he believes that letting all of his aggression towards someone who gave him permission to punch is better than beating someone who didn't even have the strength to make Harry flinch. Harry also knew that Louis only did that because he didn't want him to end up in jail; Harry never knew how much he’d fall for Louis but acts like that make him want to kidnap Louis for himself.

Harry was frustrated though, Louis didn't really know the kind of power he had on him but maybe this wasn't just his fault, Harry can’t blame the blue eyed boy for everything because he’s to blame too. If he can only outright tell him that he is better on a date with him rather than Mathew then Harry wouldn't be in this mess.

When he arrived at the principal’s office, Lydia was already giving Harry a disapproving look that a mother would give to her 5 year old toddler.

“Really Harry?” she asked.

 “At least I didn't manage to break someone’s nose this time.”  Harry beams at her and shrugs.

She rolls her eyes and offers him some biscuits which he politely denied and then she was ushering him inside Mr. Cowell’s office.

Like Lydia, Mr. Cowell’s reaction to Harry being there was an exasperated sigh and asked Harry the details of what made him get kicked out of class. Harry lied of course; he can’t just say that he flipped out when he found out about Louis’ date on his principal so he just made a lame excuse about seeing a spider under his desk. Mr. Cowell knew Harry was lying though but he just sent him to detention after class since nobody actually got hurt with his little outburst.

Harry hated detention because it means staying out in school for another hour and he wouldn't be able to walk Louis home because even if Louis is old enough to do whatever the hell he wants, his parents still gave him a curfew. Harry didn't know how Louis’ parents were able to create such perfect human being seeing as they’re horrible people who doesn't treat Louis to what he deserves to be treated which Harry thinks is royalty.

Harry is terribly whipped and they weren't even together.




Harry didn't realize that this week was really not on his favor. He should have expected it because it started with Louis having a date with someone that wasn't him and now he finds out that said date will be happen in three days and he had a whole period where Mathew was sitting right in front of him and Liam is right beside him, stopping him whenever he would try and throw crumpled paper on Mathew’s annoying head or when he tried tripping him when class was over. Liam is a good person but a very shit friend.

Harry was in a really bad mood and he kept ignoring Liam when they were on their way to meet up with Zayn, Louis and Niall.

He was surprised though when Liam pulled him inside an empty room.

He raised an eyebrow at his friend, confused on why he suddenly wanted some privacy when they were about to meet up their friends. Harry knew Liam wouldn't miss a second to be with Zayn and this was kind of making them late.

“This is not the right time to be making an affair Liam, your husband is waiting. Unless this is a kink of yours then I’m not one to judge.” He teased and let out a laugh when Liam blushed and splutters.

Liam took some time composing himself before facing Harry seriously.

“I’m not here to have sex with you, you’re not my type.”

“Ouch.” Harry said halfheartedly.

“Anyway, I want to talk to you about Louis.” Liam added.

Harry rolled his eyes and leaned his back on the empty teacher’s table.

“Your boyfriend nagging me nonstop is torture enough; please don’t add more to it.”

Liam and Zayn truly are made for each other, Harry can’t find a more perfect couple that these two. They are both worse than his parents because of their nonstop scolding and lecture.

“I’m being serious Harry, I know this isn't really very helpful and I don’t want to add more in your overflowing plate but you really have to do something mate. I can’t stand seeing all this heart eyes on your face whenever you see Louis and this sad kicked puppy look when you don’t.”

Harry just stared at Liam as if he’d grown a two heads and a new pair of eyes.

“Hey Liam, are you sure you’re talking about the same guy?” he questioned.

“I know what it feels to be in love and I’m lucky to have it with Zayn. And yes, that’s how you look because even if you have this bad boy image going around, you’re still the same Harry that Louis likes to describe as a fierce little kitten.”

“Louis describes me as what?!” Harry asked incredulously.

That explains why Zayn and Liam weren't really that scared of him even if he threatens them sometimes. He should probably try to hide more of his feelings and learn to control it.

“That’s not the point; all I want is for you two to be happy so just ask him out Harry.”

Harry rolls his eyes at that. “I would have done it already if it was easy you know.”

“Harry you-“ He quickly cuts him off because he’s really sick of being treated like a child.

“No, stop Liam. I consider you a friend and I really don’t fancy punching you right now because Zayn would be upset and then Louis would too and I don’t want that. I would really appreciate if you and Zayn would back off and let me do what I want. I want to protect Louis and I want him happy and if that Mathew guy makes him happy then so be it. You can leave me all alone and stop pitying me; I’ve had enough people pitying me already.”

Harry then left, leaving Liam alone in the room. He suddenly didn't want to be with anyone at the moment so he went straight to the gym to hide behind the bleachers. It wasn't his intention to make Liam feel bad and it really hurt to admit even to himself that Louis will be happier with anyone beside Harry. Harry is a person brought out of anger and misfortune and he didn't even know if he’ll pass this year and be able to graduate. People are already starting to look so lowly of Louis because he keeps hanging out with Harry and he didn't want to drag Louis to the dirt with him. Harry should try and distance himself away from Louis.

Maybe Louis’ date with Mathew isn't a bad thing, maybe it’s a start.




Harry didn't know how long he stayed at the gym but he knew that his two other classes are already over and some student’s might already left school to go home but he didn't feel like moving from his spot. It wasn't like this was the first time he skipped classes, there were loads of times and sometimes weekly but it all toned down when Louis asked him to not skip anymore.

Seriously, why is he just realizing this just now? Louis has always been in control of his life, it’s not like he’s mad about it and he knew Louis was only doing this for the better and straightening his life out but surely he shouldn't have gave him all that much power to do it.

Ever since they became friends, Louis already has a say in all his decisions, heck even his life and he haven’t complain even a bit.

Is this really what Harry has become?

Harry doesn't normally do the friends thing let alone be included in a group consisted of two power couple, an overly excited and childish Irish and a perfect blue eyed angel.  Some people would describe him as heartless or an explosion waiting to happen but never a fierce kitten.

This was all so strange and Harry was too busy following Louis around to think much of it. Louis has completely changed him and he wasn't sure if he liked it.

What a cliché way to suddenly have a teenage midlife crisis in a school gym behind a dirty bleacher.

Harry was fucked and not in a good way he would prefer.

Chapter Text



Harry has heard many people saying nasty things about him, which he ignores because he knows there is some truth behind it but today he’s not in the mood to take people’s shit because it’s Friday and if it isn’t clear enough, tomorrow is Saturday. Harry feels like it’s taunting him, riling him up even more that he’s having a hard time controlling his emotions. He lost count on the amount of people he had snapped from just this day alone so he’s trying so hard to avoid Louis because he’s not entirely sure he could stop himself from snapping at him.

Harry might hate everything right now but he couldn’t make himself be mad at Louis even if he’s half or probably the whole reason why he’s in a pissy mood. He’s not to be blamed if he spends more hours inside the gym where his boxing classes are held. A lot of the other boxers aren’t happy because Harry was hogging the whole place and the other coaches were worried that Harry would snap so they keep a close eye on him all the time.

After school, Harry goes straight to the gym and punches as many punching bags as he can, he also had to pay from the one’s he’d damage but it was all worth it. Harry thinks it’s better than throwing all this anger to a person with the name Mathew right?

“Hey Styles, go easy on the bag please, I just bought those last week.” Paul, the owner of the gym and Harry’s personal coach grumbled from where he was returning the used boxing gloves on the shelf.

Everyone has already left and Paul was supposed to be closing the gym because there was an upcoming match tomorrow and he had to get up early tomorrow so he can get everything ready but Harry was making it difficult for him to have an early night.

“Sorry Paul.” Harry muttered as he threw another punch at the bag, wincing when it started tearing a little.

Paul was going to skin Harry if he finds out that he was a few punches away from ruining another equipment so he stopped and removed the white bandages that was wrapped around his hand and fist. His whole hand felt numbed and almost turning into an ugly color of black and blue, blood stains smeared on his knuckles.

“Damn it Harry, what the hell are you trying to do?” Paul curses when he saw the state of Harry’s hands.

“I’m fine.” Harry shrugged his concerns off.

Harry was already a regular in the gym and Paul knew him well and he couldn’t care less about his attitude so he took the first aid kit on his table and pulled Harry to a chair, he resisted at first but settled down when Paul threatens to knock him out if he continues to be a pain the ass.

They were silent for the first couple of minutes, Harry ignoring Paul as he clean the cuts on his knuckles with antiseptic and wrapping another round of clean bandages over it.

“So would you prefer destroying everything that I own or talk about it?” Paul asks.

“The first one sounds really tempting Paul.” Harry answers back at him.

He received a smack on the head for that retort.

“Stop being an asshole Harry, don’t be so surprise but I may look lethal to everyone and can knock all your teeth off but I care for you the same way as a father to a son would. Lord knows I’ve spent four years trying to stop you from killing people and ending up in jail.”

Harry let out an annoyed huff but felt a little bit glad to know that he had Paul amongst other people; he wouldn’t know what to do if he didn’t have the man. He really is like a father he never had.

Harry felt a gentle hand on his back and he turns to Paul who was looking at him in concern. He looked away briefly and gave out a deep exasperated sigh in return.

“I just have a lot in my mind right now but I think it’ll pass.” He murmurs to him.

“Let me guess, it involves that friend of yours, Louis isn’t it?”

Harry turns to Paul quickly with wide eyes and mouth hanging open but quickly changed his expression to a cold glare, not wanting to give anything up.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He says before standing up, walking hurriedly to his bag to leave Paul before he uncovers more of Harry’s secret, which he is clueless about how Paul manages to figure it out when Louis has no clue.

Harry spends majority of his time with Louis and only a couple of hours with Paul, how it that possible!?

“I don’t know what you’re going through right now but I’m not letting you do more stuff for a week, rest your hand first before you come back.” He orders the young teen.

Harry merely rolled his eyes and almost ran out of the door to distance himself away from Paul.




Saturday came way to fast in Harry’s opinion, he was also realizing now that if he’s not busying himself with drilling a hole at a punching bag then his mind would start thinking and the last time he let his mind wander on unchartered territory, he had a teenage midlife crisis inside the school gym behind some dirty bleachers.

He had also recall all the excuses he made so that he can maybe distance himself away from Louis and remembered Louis’ confused face whenever he would utter them. Zayn is surprisingly not pestering him with deep melodramatic meanings and questions because he was also ignoring Harry for making Liam feel bad. Liam has been apologizing nonstop and even if Harry had said not to worry about it, he still hasn’t forgiven himself and Zayn didn’t like a worried Liam. Niall was his usual carefree self, just trying to erase the tension whenever they’re all together, it wasn’t really working.

Harry just planned to go to some college party that he was invited to attend so get his mind off of Louis’ cursed date. He decided to wear his tightest jeans and his buttoned up shirt, wanting to look good for this party and the fleeting thought of getting laid crossed his mind but was immediately crushed when his phone dinged signaling that he had received a message.

The name Louis crossed his screen and with furrowed eyebrows, he opened the text and read it.

From Lou,

Um hey Haz, can you please come over?

Harry wanted to bang his head on the ball or throw himself on an oncoming bus because he was already hurrying towards Louis house without a second thought, all of his plan for the night gone because Louis needed him, he had asked for his presence and no self control can stop him after spending the week tiptoeing around him.

Harry didn’t want to admit it but he was starting to get dependent on Louis’ presence, just a few day of not spending it with the blue eyed boy had made Harry so out of bound. The thought terrifies him.

When he arrived at Louis house, he was expecting Louis’ parents to greet him with hostile glances and unkind comments but Louis was the one who opened the door, hair disheveled and shirtless.

Harry had to forcefully stop himself from snatching Louis and running away, the things this boy does to him is unimaginable…also not very appropriate.

“Harry! You came!” Louis sounded so happy to see him, Harry couldn’t breathe.

Harry clears his throat first before speaking because he knows how Louis’ current lack of shirt is doing things on him.

“Uh yeah, you texted me. I thought it was important.”

Louis didn’t reply, he just grabbed Harry’s hand and Harry felt his heart doing some weird tango inside his chest and he cursed himself for thinking such metaphor, he was disgusting sometimes.

Besides ogling at Louis beautiful flawless back, Harry didn’t know a back could be so pretty, he also notices the lack of evil glaring that he usually get from Louis’ parents.

“Hey Lou, where’s your parents?” he asks as Louis drags him further upstairs, probably to his room.

Harry really shouldn’t feel like some dumb teenager that’s about to see his crush’s bedroom, he’s been inside Louis’ bedroom countless of times, most times he’d sneaked in because Louis’ parents hated him.

“Oh, they left for the evening and won’t be back until tomorrow.”

Harry felt relieve knowing Louis’ parents are gone, he wasn’t in the mood to argue with them.

They arrived at Louis’ bedroom and Harry was not surprise to see the mountain of clothes piled up at the center of the bed, Louis wasn’t the tidiest person at all.

“So you called me so I could help you clean your room?” Harry asks in confusion.

He didn’t know the reason why Louis asked for him, surely he must have noticed how Harry was ignoring him. They’ve texted a bit but that’s it beside awkward lunch at the cafeteria at school because Harry decided to sulk every time.

“It’s embarrassing please don’t laugh but I really really need you to help me get ready for my date tonight.” Louis said eagerly as if his statement did not pierce a dagger in Harry’s already tortured heart.

The sound of his enthusiastic voice should lift Harry’s mood because a happy Louis is what he usually aims to achieve but the reason behind that happiness is another story. Harry couldn’t say no and watch as that very same expression falls, it would be worse than trying to ignore Louis at school.

“Hey Harry, are you ok?” Louis’ face suddenly fell and was replaced with worry.

Harry mentally cursed himself, this is what he was trying to avoid. Upsetting Louis is like a continues stab in his gut, seriously, Harry’s feeling isn’t healthy at all.

He shook his worries away and forced a large grin on his face, he’s usually a pro at faking what he’s really feeling right? Tricking Louis would be easy as getting an A….which he is yet to achieve but you get the point.

“It’s fine Lou, I know that I had a really great fashion sense but I’m curious as to why you didn’t chose Zayn on that matter, you know he’s look can make a model run away with his money” Harry joked.

It worked because Louis was smiling again, the smile where he get’s this cute crinkly lines on his eyes and it shouldn’t be possible for him to look adorable with that smile and hot since he still hasn’t got the idea of wearing a shirt. Harry tried to divert his eyes away from Louis’ collarbones and back to his face.

Maybe he ought to just wrap all of his feelings inside a box and hide it away forever in his head because he couldn’t or wouldn’t let that smile disappear from Louis’ face.

Besides, he shouldn’t be beating himself up because this would be just one date. Maybe Mathew turns out to be a big douche, maybe a bigger asshole than Harry and then Louis would hate him forever and everything will go back to the way it is.

“Ok Lou, time to do your makeover.” Harry said with an annoying girlish squeak.

Louis burst out laughing and Harry felt himself swoon.

‘Damn it, control yourself Harold’ he chastise himself.

Didn’t he just say that he’ll try locking his feelings up.

“Oh my god Haz! Don’t you ever make a repeat of that!” Louis giggles.

This is going to be harder than I thought’ he added to himself as he watched Louis giggle helplessly, and again, shirtless. Now Harry’s not to be blamed for drooling.




If there is one thing that Harry hated, it’s being a pushover.

Actually that’s a lie because you would be stupid or suicidal if you think you can just push Harry over like some sort of personal slave but even Harry has his own exceptions. That exception goes by the name Louis Tomlinson.

Harry was seating inside a taxi, a gloomy look all over his face because Louis did not just only tease him by walking around his room shirtless and had flashed Harry his boxer clad bum when he changed into some pants but also asked him to chaperone on his date.

Harry almost lost all his shit when Louis asked him to come with him on his date, like he was doing this purposely to slowly crush Harry’s heart and step on it over and over again until it’s nothing but dust that the wind will soon carry.

Harry’s supposed to be reaction was scream and pull his heart and offer it on Louis in a silver platter to make it easy for Harry, but the look on Louis’ face is the same as the look a young boy would have when he asks his parents for a gift on Christmas.

Surely, his defenses are futile and he had no other choice but to agree.

So that makes him such a big fat pussy, for letting Louis do this things to him which he is again, very oblivious about. Harry groans to himself but he didn’t notice that he did it rather loudly for Louis to notice.

“Um Haz, are you sure I’m not bothering you at all?” Louis asks as he bit his lip.

He was blushing, almost embarrass because he didn’t want to drag Harry in this. Harry noticed the look on Louis’ face and he was erasing any trace of gloominess in his features.

“Hey, I already told you, I got nothing better to do tonight so it’s not a big deal.”

Louis stares at him for a second before looking away and blushing really hard.

“I’m really sorry, it’s just, this is going to be like a first for me and I can’t help but worry that I’ll mess things up.” He murmurs almost quietly that Harry had to lean closer to hear him.


Louis quickly cuts him off.

“I know this is going to sound really weird but I just feel more at ease when I know that you’ll be around.” He quickly added.

Harry felt something strange deep inside him but he quickly pushed it all away, this isn’t the right moment to stare at Louis with gigantic heart eyes, it would be too damn obvious.

“So you feel safe with me then?” were the next thing that came out of Harry’s mouth.

Louis didn’t answer verbally but he settles with a close lipped smile and a nod before looking out on the window of the taxi while Harry was left to stare at his face and was summoning all of his self control to not reach out and take Louis’ hand with his own.

It's getting more and more difficult each day, the strands of self control is growing thin.










Chapter Text



Louis looks really good tonight, of course he looks good every time Harry sees him but there’s just something particularly good about Louis wearing one of Harry’s jumper. It was an old jumper that Harry owned in his freshmen year but he started growing more and now it doesn’t fit anymore but is the perfect size for Louis so Harry gave it to him when Louis asked for it. Harry was feeling rather possessive tonight and he hopes Mathew would sense it and run away.

They have arrived to the place where Mathew said he’ll be, Harry thought that this is by far the worst date in the entire history of dates because Mathew could have planned this more thoroughly since he’s given a once in a lifetime opportunity to spend time with a Louis Tomlinson. Mathew decided on a fancy dinner which would be perfect if Louis was actually into such bullshit.

Harry can already sense Louis’ apprehension as he fidgets on his foot. They were both standing near the entrance and Harry hated how Louis was nervously playing with the sleeve of his jumper, staring at his hands as people from left and right stared at them with judging eyes. The fact that Mathew didn’t tell Louis that they’ll be eating at one of the most high end restaurants in town with the most haughty rich bastards around who thinks that they own the world is bad enough but Louis’ insecurity about being obviously underdressed because the people inside were basically wearing suit and fancy gowns eating food that probably cost more than Harry’s flat is the worst.

“You ok Lou?” Harry asked in concern.

Louis turns his head to him and bit his lip nervously, a really bad habit of his and a really great distraction for Harry because he couldn’t help but stare at Louis’ lips which were red and raw from the abuse. Harry wouldn’t mind biting it as well.

Harry was taken out of his inappropriate thoughts by a sudden beep of a car, a really fancy looking ass car that had gracefully stopped at the side of the road. A valet from the restaurant hopped off from where his station and rushed next to the car. Of course being the cliché that this was, the car door was opened and Mathew stepped out of the car, wearing a fucking suit. Mathew saw Louis and sends him a nervous smile and talked to the valet to take care of his car.

Harry turns to see Louis’ reaction and was a bit hurt to see him smile at Mathew back, the nervousness from earlier now gone and ok, Harry wasn’t a bit hurt….but it was really fucking killing him.

Mathew was making his way towards them and he was too engrossed to stare at Louis that he didn’t really notice Harry which was really unbelievable because Harry was practically glued to Louis’ side. Harry watched as Mathew beamed at Louis and his eyes widening when he finally notices Harry.

“Hi Louis…uh Harry?!” he exclaims.

Harry didn’t know what was wrong with smart people but Mathew didn’t really understand the glare that was directed at him, Harry wanted nothing more than for him to disappear under his glare.

“What is he doing here?” Mathew asked Louis with a curious frown.

“I’ll be chaperoning.” Harry answered for Louis instead.

Actually, if Louis didn’t invite him on his date, Harry would probably follow them secretly like the stalker that he is but Louis didn’t have to know that.

Mathew stared at him for a minute before giving him a tight lipped smile. Harry knew that Mathew’s probably a little uncomfortable with him being around on his and Louis’ date.

“Um ok, but I only made reservation for two?” Mathew asked.

Harry’s smug grin vanished when he realized that of course it’s only a date for two person, it wasn’t planned to bring him along so that only means he’ll be stuck outside.

“I wouldn’t mind eating at another place, Harry and I are underdressed for such a fancy eating place and I don’t feel comfortable leaving Harry outside while we eat.” Louis answered.

Harry knew it was a bad idea at the beginning to just follow Louis and Mathew around because he wouldn’t be able to control his overflowing jealousy and urge to claim Louis to himself but Louis saying things like that just makes him want to just kidnap him away from Mathew.

He can’t help but stare at Louis, a fond expression written all over his face and he wouldn’t give a damn if Mathew notices said expression.

Which of course Mathew did, Mathew was deeply and utterly surprise at the revelation. Mathew had heard warnings, tons of them from his friends about this not being a good idea. They told him about how Harry wouldn’t be too happy with his plans to ask Louis out but he shrugged them all off thinking that it was absurd for Harry to like Louis and the other way around. They were obviously a terrible match in Mathew’s opinion so seeing it up close on how Louis meant to Harry and Harry’s glaringly obvious feeling towards his best friend is not ok with him.

This was supposed to be their date wasn’t it? Mathew wasn’t giving up easily without a fight.




Harry knew something was suddenly different about Mathew, something changed because he constantly wanted to keep Louis’ attention all to himself. Bastard.

Since they didn’t eat at the restaurant, they have to go and ride Mathew’s fancy car and find another place to have dinner in. Harry doesn’t like how Mathew touched Louis’ back to help him enter his car; he was really trying hard not to yank or cut his arm off. Harry knew he was just being a gentleman but damn it, the date hasn’t even officially started but everything is already pissing him off. Harry sat at the back since he can’t really fit himself next to Louis in the passenger side, he was left there to sulk and glare at the back of Mathew’s head.

Harry knows it was supposed to be their date but from the looks of it, Mathew was trying hard to make Louis laugh by telling corny jokes that doesn’t really sound funny at all but Louis thinks it was so he doubled in laughter.

Seriously, there is something wrong with the both of them.

Harry thanked everything that is holy when the car stopped, he didn’t know how long he can suffer being stuffed inside a car with Louis and Mathew sitting in front and bantering like they’ve known each other for years.

Everyone knows how awkward it is to third wheel on a date and it’s a million times worse when it’s the person you’re so deeply in love with. Why does he torture himself like this, is he some kind of masochist?

Mathew chooses a simple little diner to eat, Louis looks really comfortable with the chosen place and he looked at Harry and gave him a wide grin which he returns immediately, he didn’t want Louis to catch him sulking. He wanted Louis to enjoy and not worry about him, as much as he prayed for this to be the worst date of all, he wouldn’t let it happen to Louis because like what he said before, Louis Tomlinson deserves the best.

They step out of the car and Harry wanted to laugh because Mathew was waiting for a valet to appear to park his car. It seems little old Mathew isn’t used to eating in small diners.

“Um Mathew, you need to park your own car.” Louis told him after Mathew grumbles about valet not doing their jobs properly.

Mathew stares at Louis and Harry hid his laugh by coughing which earned him a glare from Mathew.
He smirked at him in return.

“I’ll just go find a parking space, why don’t you go first Lou and then order some food for ‘US’.”

Mathew has placed quite an emphasis on the word ‘us’, Harry just rolled his eyes at him. Good thing Louis kept being oblivious and just nod at Mathew as an answer before pulling Harry’s arm and dragging him inside.

Harry smiled at Louis and he can practically feel Mathew’s glare at the back of his head but he ignored it in order to feel Louis’ hold on his arm, it feels warm unlike Mathew’s which was cold.

Harry was expecting to be pulled at a two seat table because he figures Louis would want to have some kind of privacy while having dinner with Mathew and he’ll be off to the front where he can sit alone and watch as Louis enjoys himself, he’ll probably drink a glass or two of vodka to try and ease the pain of seeing Louis on a date with someone that wasn’t him.

Oh god, Harry hated himself for thinking that. It was all gross and cheesy and is the same things a 13 year old teenage girl would think. Is that what Harry has become? A prepubescent teenager pining?

What he wasn’t expecting was Louis ignoring the empty tables and dragging Harry to the front and took a seat. He didn’t object though because this just means he can still eat with Louis right beside him and maybe he could dream that this is a date between the two of them, no Mathew to ruin the scene.

“Louis? Why are you sitting here in front and not on a private booth?”

Speak of the devil.

Harry looks at his back and saw Mathew standing right behind them with a confused frown, when Mathew notices Harry’s look, he glares at him. Harry just gave him a triumphant smile which translates to ‘Louis didn’t want to be alone with you hahahaha, it suck doesn’t it?’.

“I just don’t feel like it and this turning chairs looks fun.” Louis answers him as he spins on his chair which was so adorable Harry’s heart was hurting at the cuteness of it.

“Ok then, if that’s what you want.” Mathew said uneasily as he took a seat on Louis’ left, eying Harry seriously.

Louis was sat in the middle with Harry on his right and Mathew on his left. Mathew looks really out of place since he’s still wearing his suit and some truck drivers eating were snickering at him from the other side.

“So what are you guys ordering?” Mathew asked as he looked at the menu with a weird look.

It seems he doesn’t have a single clue on to what to get.

Meanwhile, Louis has a thoughtful look on his face as he checked the contents of the menu one by one; he then turns to Harry.

“Do you think their burgers are good Harry?” he asked.

Harry didn’t know if he should jump with glee or remain smug because Louis was asking Harry and not Mathew and this was supposed to be them spending time together. It seems Louis was giving him more of his attention now; he was elated at the thought.

“I think the burgers are just fine Lou, maybe you’ll like a side of chips with it as well.”

“Oh, you’re right, that does sound yummy.” Louis agreed before calling the waitress’ attention.

The waitress came and took their orders, promising to return with their food in a while so they were left there alone.

“So Lou, have you talked to Mr. Bruce about the next competition on spring?” Mathew asked.

Louis seems to brighten up at the question and he turns his attention towards Mathew as he excitedly spoke to him. Harry could see and feel Mathew’s smirk from where he is and he grumbles under his breath.

So this is how he wanted it then, for them to try and get Louis’ attention as they wait for their order? Harry has to give it to him; he has the guts to compete with him.

Well then, let the games begin.


Chapter Text



There were several things Harry found out about Mathew, first, he was damn rich (of course), secondly, for a nerd, he does have the balls to stand up to Harry and lastly, he’s a fucking asshole.

Louis had excused himself to go the bathroom leaving Harry and Mathew to glare openly without Louis blocking them. Harry had a smirk on his face and Mathew had a stormy pissed off look. If this would end up in a fight, Harry’s not going to back down. He’s a trained boxer for fuck sake, if Mathew asks to be punched in the face then Harry will be honored to do it for him for free, gladly even.

“Whatever you’re doing Harry, stop.” Mathew hissed at him after making sure that Louis was inside the loo.

Harry raised an eyebrow at him after taking a sip to see Mathew looking more pissed when he answered him with a shrug.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You really are an asshole, I thought the rumor weren’t true since you’re Louis’ best friend but I guess even Louis makes mistakes right?” It was Mathew’s turn to smirk at Harry.

Harry was holding his glass with so much force he thinks it’ll break in his grasp but it he’s not worried of injuring himself, he’s more worried of killing Mathew at such a public place with Louis not that far. Harry had promised him to never hurt anyone who hasn’t given him the consent to hurt them which sucks.

Harry closed his eyes for a brief moment to try and calm himself down, it was the trick Louis taught him when he’s about to burst and it had helped stopped numerous murderous desire. He shouldn’t let him get to him that easy; Mathew was trying to rile him up so if Louis would see him then he’ll be kicked out of this date. He’s not sure if chaperones get kicked out of dates that are not technically theirs to begin with.

“If you think I’ll lash out and punch you like what you’re planning to do would help you win Louis to yourself then I don’t think you’re really that smart.”

Mathew looks surprise and he turns away to stare at anything else besides Harry, Harry mentally cheered and congratulated himself at how calm he had handled that.

Louis had returned shortly and had greeted them with a beaming smile, not knowing what just happened between Harry and Mathew earlier.






To say that the ‘date’ with Louis and Mathew was a disaster is a big understatement. Harry should feel a little sorry for Mathew for being the reason of said date not going to well for Mathew but he did ask for it. He should’ve back down when he got the chance because Harry is not one for losing and the battle to who can get Louis’ attention more, they’ve been friends for years that gives him the advantage of knowing more about Louis’ life like how Louis prefers putting his ketchup directly to his fries and how he sometimes likes taking Harry’s food which is a habit that Mathew obviously does not like but Harry was secretly beaming.

But it seems Mathew was also a fighter because Harry was convinced that he’d just go and leave because he has the upper hand but he suggest they go to a fair that he’d heard had recently opened. Harry had silently cursed the boy because he knew Louis loved those kinds of things. Harry saw the glint of excitement shine through Louis’ eyes and he can’t help but feel jealous because he wasn’t the reason for it.

He’s also not very fond of the one hour long car ride at the backseat watching Louis and Mathew talk and bicker. Harry knew Mathew was feeling rather smug and the looks he sent Harry were making him want to punch the smirk of his face.

When they arrived at the place (thank god, harry thought to himself), Harry got out of the car quite grumpily but his mood changes when he saw the mesmerize look on Louis’ face as he stared at the things going on inside the fair. People from different ages roaming and gathering around food stalls scattered everywhere. Children clutching their stuffed toys with an expression that matched almost like Louis. Almost because nothing would match Louis’.

Louis then turns to beam at Harry and Harry really melts at that but it all disappears when Mathew suddenly grabbed Louis and pulled him towards a corn dog stand. Harry knew Louis hated corn dogs by the way he cringed at the one offered to him but accepted it due to his politeness. Harry shook his head and went over a cotton candy stand because he knew Louis loved those so much, it’s the first thing he would order Harry to buy whenever they saw or even walk pass a cotton candy stall.

He paid the man some money and walked over to where Louis and Mathew were standing, Mathew was busy eating his food while Louis was staring at his in distaste. Harry smirked at that but he tried to act cool when he brought the sweet snack to Louis face.

“Oh, thank you Haz.” He happily took the snack out of Harry’s hand and proceeds to take big bites off of it, corn dog long forgotten on his other hand.

He stole a glance towards Mathew and saw him glaring at Harry for probably the millionth time this evening but Harry really didn’t care about what he’s feeling knowing that he deserves to be outshined by Harry.

“So do you want to try some rides Lou?” Mathew asked instead, ignoring Harry completely.

Harry rolled his eyes at that, way to be childish. He’s the one who started all this.

Louis was on his last bite of cotton candy when he nodded, excitedly pulling both Mathew and Harry’s hand.

They were on their way to the carousel when Harry vaguely heard someone calling his name so he made a quick stop, Louis and Mathew doing the same because Louis still had a hold of his arm along with Mathew’s.

“Harry! It really is you!”

And then Harry was being engulfed into a tight embrace, his vision being blocked by unruly blonde hair and his nose being filled with a fruity scent that stings a bit.

His nose scrunched as he’s about to let an irritating sneeze but the person hugging him has pulled away, making him breathe more comfortably.

He vaguely felt the tightening hold on his arm as he stared at the person who was now grinning mischievously at Harry.

“Perrie?” He asked in almost a whisper because it really looks like her.

Perrie who was best friend with Harry’s older sister, who should not be here standing in front of Harry because he knew she was supposed to be thousands of miles away.

“The one and only.” She laughed.

“Um, wow.” Is the only thing he was able to say because he’s still in a bit of a shock.

But he was brought out of his daze by a rather loud cough and another squeeze on his arm, he turns to where Louis was staring at Perrie with a confused and a barely noticed frown that only Harry can see and Mathew who was openly checking Perrie out like he’s not supposed to be in a date with said date just standing a few meters away from him. Harry seriously thinks he deserves quite a beating.

“Oh, who’s your friend curly?” Mathew asked after shrugging off Louis’ hold on his arm. Louis was startled but pulled his hand away, sending Mathew a confused and unsure look that made Harry’s blood boil because how dare Mathew make Louis feel so unsure.

Louis then turns his gaze to Harry, sending him a questioning look but not letting go of his hold on Harry’s arm.

“Oh yeah, well this is Perrie and she’s uh... a friend.”

Harry never sounded more unsure in his entire life and Louis must have realized because he was scowling at Harry and trying to pull him away.

“Can I talk to Harry for a moment please?” Louis asked the other two; he didn’t even wait for them to answer because he was already pulling Harry away.

When they were a couple of meters away from them, Louis stopped and turns to Harry with a very cute expression on his face. He was supposed to act angry or upset but all he did was pout and Harry would have snog him right then and there if he didn’t just saw a childhood memory earlier.

“Harry, who is she?” Louis asked, crossing his arms over her chest in a manner so childish that Harry is starting to question himself if Louis is genuinely real.

“I told you Lou, she’s a friend.”

Louis squints his eyes at Harry, as if trying to look if a sign if Harry was lying or not.

“Is she an ex-girlfriend?”

Harry made a face at that because he never felt anything romantic towards Perrie, he’s more of an older sister to him so he’s not really sure why Louis was asking this questions like he’s jealo-

“Wait, are you jealous of Perrie!?” Harry asked as soon as his mind came up with the conclusion.

Louis looks equally startled; he turned into various color of red and refused to look at Harry in the eye.

“I am not; I’m just upset because you never mention a Perrie before and thought that you were hiding things from me.” He murmured.

Harry stared at Louis blushing form, not quite sure what to say because there’s a reason Harry’s not telling stuff like this to Louis and he’s not sure if he could really tell him at all.

He didn’t know how Louis would react and nothing else matter more to Harry than Louis’ opinion.

“Why don’t we just go back, they might be getting bored already? You and Mathew are suppose to be on a date remember.” Was what he asked instead of giving a clear explanation to Louis.

Louis looked a bit hurt for a second but Harry forced himself to ignore it as he turns to walk back to where they left Mathew and Perrie by themselves.

For the first time Harry didn’t turn to look behind him to check if Louis was ok or not because he’s sure as hell not.



Chapter Text



Louis always knew that he was fairly gifted when it comes quick thinking and absorbing details with excellent precision and can absolutely solve various equations at once without as much as breaking a sweat.

Those things don’t make him perfect whatsoever since he’s still human and has several flaws himself.

For one, Louis is very very horrible in figuring people out which sucks because he so deeply want to figure Harry out.

It’s Tuesday and Harry has yet to show himself to school. Ok, you might think he’s over reacting but Harry never misses school because Louis always ends up getting upset with him when he does, Harry is really near getting suspended and he doesn’t need to get kicked out after missing a few class. Even if Louis thinks Harry is the nicest person alive, Harry still have a reputation of breaking people’s noses and had been reported several times.

 Louis was worried it had something to do with what happened when Mathew, Harry and him went out. Louis knew it was supposed to be him and Mathew only but Harry really makes him feel safe and comfortable and he didn’t think he’d enjoy himself if he wasn’t there.

That right there is very confusing indeed because it felt like Louis grew accustomed to Harry’s presence and has become dependent on him, like there are no days that Harry wasn’t with him whether it’d be eating lunch or studying in the library and walking home. If they weren’t next to each other then they’re usually texting each other non-stop with Harry sending ridiculous knock-knock jokes that’s not even remotely funny but hilarious to Louis.

But it’s been a days and call him paranoid but Louis hasn’t heard a word from Harry and it’s making him anxious and worried. He and Harry rarely fight and if they were, it’s only because Louis refused to share his food to Harry or Harry refused to change the channel when they’re watching TV together so it’s not a major fight but this one seems really big.

It all ends up to that night when Harry had snapped at him after questioning him about the girl that had suddenly appeared.

Did he really do something at that time, because as far as he remembers they were fine earlier that day? Harry only started acting weird when that attractive girl arrived and Louis still didn’t know who she was. She’d left after pulling Harry to the side to have a private conversation and he still doesn’t know what she’d told but it definitely set Harry’s mood off.

Louis loved carnivals and fairs but he didn’t particularly enjoy his time on that day because Harry had also disappeared after he had gone to the toilet for a wee. Mathew said that he had something to do and Louis was hurt because he didn’t think Harry would just leave in the middle of his date even though he was just chaperoning.

He and Mathew had tried a few rides but Louis didn’t particularly like any moment of it especially when Mathew was trying to put his hand on his bum. He just angrily left Mathew at the line towards the Ferris wheel when he pinched his behind and took a cab home.

It was clear that Louis date was a mess and he refused to acknowledge Mathew in class because all this time he thought he was a great person because he likes studying as much as he does but he was nothing but a perverted spoiled asshole and Louis hated him.

He had a much clear understanding about never judging a book by its cover because when he first met Harry, he already thought he was bad news and had told himself to stay away but he turned out to be wrong and Harry has become one of his favourite person alive. Louis had a few favourite people but most of them were dead like Albert Einstein and Galileo, he almost liked Mathew for a second and thought he’d be included in his list (Yes, he does have a list of all the people he have liked and look up to).

Louis sighed and kicked a lone pebble on the road; he was on his way to school on foot because he got up late and missed the bus. His parents were also not home because they left early for work and had forgotten to leave Louis’ school money so he didn’t have any to hail a cab.

Louis was frustrated because he was never late to school but he can’t sleep last night with all the thoughts running in his head about Harry’s whereabouts, he had a sudden thought of Harry getting into a huge fight and lying unconscious somewhere and he had spent three hours searching the internet for any news related to finding an unconscious man or any fights happening around town.

He was unsuccessful and only slept for four hours which was torture because he already feels sleepy and he didn’t know if he’ll be able to stay awake in class.

When he arrived in school with a few minutes to spare before the bell rings, he went straight to his locker to get his books.

Louis was greeted by several looks from the students hanging around their lockers and he unconsciously tried straightening his clothes. He didn’t know why they were looking at him like he committed a crime and judging by the almost disgusted stares then maybe he did.

He quickens his pace and focused his gaze on the tiled floor but he can still here their murmurs, whispers of his name being carried through the hallway as he passed.

Louis felt like crying because he had barely slept last night and now everyone seems to know something about him that he didn’t have a clue on what it is and it feels like it’s not a good thing.

“That’s Louis Tomlinson.”

“Oh is that him?”

“Yeah. He’s disgusting.”

Those were snippets of what Louis was hearing around him and his heart was beating really hard and his breathing was getting out of control. His clothes felt suffocating and all the stares surrounding him is slowly drowning him.

Louis knew he should calm down before he ends up having a panic attack.

He decided to forget about his books so he turns around to run away but was suddenly shoved roughly to the side. He fell to the floor and his back hitting a barely opened locker door which caused him to cry out in surprise and in pain.

“W-what?” he stuttered as he tried looking for the culprit who pushed him.

He lifted his gaze and felt his blood ran cold when his scared eyes met the disgusted gaze of non-other than Blake. Blake who has been terrorizing Louis life forever and had only stopped when he moved from a different state. He and Blake had been classmates since they were little. Blakehad caused numerous disaster in Louis’ life like how he had broken his action figure that he brought to school in Primary and never apologized for it and the time when he had pushed Louis out of a swing in Year 1. Blake had also slipped a spider in Louis’ lunch in year 2 and had started stealing Louis lunch money in year 3 onwards.

He was clichéd bully that everyone adores because he was rich and handsome and constantly manipulated people in doing things that he wanted. So when he wanted to ruin someone’s life then say goodbye because it’ll happen. Louis thought his life would get better when he heard the news that Blake is transferring school because his parents got promoted to work so it means he’ll be gone in Louis life for good. He was mistaken since some of Blake’s old friends still liked pushing him around making his life equally as hell but then Harry came and everyone backed away when he manages to hospitalize those people that messed with Louis.

So Louis didn’t know why Blake was suddenly here and pushing him around when he knew he had transferred to another state and surely he Harry would bre- oh, Louis forgot….Harry wasn’t here.

Louis was shaking when Blake crouched down in front of him and leaned close to his hear, his breath sending shivers that made his skin crawl. He closed his eyes and refused to meet his eyes.

“Did you miss me Louis?” he had murmured menacingly with a deep chuckle that sounds similar to Harry.

No, Blake will never be anything close to Harry.

“Looks like you still don’t have a friend, pity because I gave you years to at least have one friend and yet you wasted it by being really pathetic.” He snickered.

He didn’t know what to do because it’s been too long since he felt the need to defend himself. He was pathetic, why can’t he fight back, why is he so weak? Why does he let these people push him around like he’s worth nothing….but maybe he does, maybe he deserved it.

“Hey! What the fuck do you think you’re doing, get away from him you dick!” A voice shouted from where a group of students had started gathering.

Everyone stepped aside to let the person step forward and maybe there was a tiny voice in Louis’ head that’s hoping it’d be Harry and he tried to not be disappointed when he saw Zayn, followed by Liam and Niall stomped through the crowd and pushed anyone that tried to stop them from reaching Louis.

Blake stood up from where he was crouched down in front of Louis and stared curiously at Zayn.

“Hmm, I’ve never met you before.” He stated.

Zayn merely stared at him with his usual glare and shoved him aside to check on Louis who was still cowering on the floor.

Blake didn’t particularly like being ignored and was about to pull Zayn’s hair when a hand stopped him from doing so.

“Don’t.” Liam added as he forcefully pulled Blake’s hand away from Zayn.

“Oh, well if it isn’t Liam Payne.” Blake laughed at seeing Liam’s familiar face.

Blake liked teasing Liam along with Louis but Liam had started attending kick boxing in middle school so he backed away from him and decided to focus on Louis who was too small to fight back.

“Back off Blake, leave Louis alone.” Niall angrily said from where he was trying to pick Louis’ things on the floor.

“Niall bro! It’s been too long dude.” Blake happily cheered upon seeing Niall.

Niall has always hanged out with him before because his brother worked for his dad and he was always eager to follow Blake but it seems something changed because he’s now glaring at him angrily.

“I’m not your dog anymore Blake, go find someone who’ll follow you around.” Niall had hissed.

Blake was a little taken aback as he stared at the group who had just stood up to him. He glared at them all and decided that he’ll get back on them soon, they’d regret doing that to him.

So it seems Louis Tomlinson did manage to gather his group of pathetic wimps, he’ll get him first, just wait and see.





Louis had to make a quick stop to the nurse since his back had ached and he couldn’t stand straight without wincing. The other have promised that they’ll check on him later when the nursed ushered them back to class so now he was just sitting there and being miserable by himself.

He knew his life wouldn’t be the same after what just happened at the hallway earlier and he can’t help but blame himself for dragging Zayn, Liam and Niall into all of this.

Don’t get him wrong, Louis is grateful because they did just save him from that awful reunion with Blake but if he was just a little brave then he might of scared them away and leave the other’s out of this. But he’s not strong and mysterious as Zayn who looks intimidating without even trying and Liam who might seem puppy like but can actually kick your ass with his kick boxing moves and Niall, Niall who will never be able to defend himself but has tons of people who would back him up when he's in trouble so he doesn’t have a problem.

It was just Louis who had made himself feel strong by hiding behind his friends, he even used Harry as a form of protection and maybe that’s another reason that he felt like staying away from Louis.

Harry must have thought that Louis was using him as his own personal body guard and shield against people like Blake so now that he’s gone then he’s back to being wimpy little Louis Tomlinson.

The nurse had asked what had happened and even if he wants to tell everything, he was too scared because he knew Blake’s parents are contributors of the school and they’d never side with him because that’s life, whoever has the power is the one who gets everything in the end.

Louis was losing hope, everything hates him so much and he’s wondering why. Why can’t they just let him have his last few days in high school to enjoy and it seems someone’s enjoying making him miserable.

He was too lost in his thoughts to notice a figure enter the clinic. Too depressed to feel the bed dip on the side and too exhausted to stay awake that he didn’t get to see Harry watch him as he closes his eyes and sleep.




Chapter Text



Harry knew something was terribly wrong with him because if you asked Harry before about being guilty over something as simple as not going to school in a day then you’d probably be laughed at and punched because you’re implying that he actually cares which he made pretty clear that he does not.

But suddenly after waking up with another massive hangover and remembering he had class at eight, he felt utterly guilty. His body was aching in places he never thought would ache and it’s not the same pleasurable ache he gets after a shag but an ache in his joints. He had a pretty intense fight yesterday which he had won and thought it was a good enough excuse to celebrate by partying and getting drunk which he now realize is not the best idea.

He was just not ready for school but a voice in his head that sounds suspiciously like Louis was constantly reminding him that he should get up and get ready. Harry really didn’t care whether he’d get kicked out of school or if he’s lucky he might graduate but then an image of Louis’ disappointed face flashes through his eyes and he was already making a quick run to the bathroom.

God, he was so whipped and Louis wasn’t even with him at the moment.



Harry also realized that he hasn’t seen his phone since yesterday and he can’t remember where he placed it. He was trying but failing to look for it in his bag where all his other junks are scattered around. He was already ten minutes late to school so he had to walk and he had already received odd looks because of the knuckle sized bruise on his left cheek that he got from his fight yesterday. He might have won but it doesn’t mean he got out of it unscathed.

“Damn it, where the hell is that stupid phone.” He angrily muttered as he tried one more time to find it but no such luck.

He forgot to tell Louis that he wouldn’t be able to go to school yesterday because of that fight and he wasn’t able to contact him on Sunday because he was too busy training. Paul had a strict rule of no phone during training sessions so he had left his phone somewhere that he can’t remember.

Harry just wished Louis wouldn’t get upset with him especially how he had just left him alone with Mathew on their date, he knew he shouldn’t feel guilty about it because technically it wasn’t their date but that doesn’t stop him from being worried about Mathew trying to make a move at Louis.

Harry’s eyes widened when he suddenly thought of Mathew taking advantage of Louis and he hadn’t talked to him for two days so he didn’t know if he was ok.

“Fuck.” He muttered under his breath before fixing his bag and sprinting towards school.

If Mathew ever laid a finger without Louis’ consent then Harry would happily rearrange his face for him.

Harry had arrived with an empty hallway because he was already late for first period, there was no point in going and he’ll probably end up getting a detention so he’ll just try to wait for Louis in second period. He had to take a shortcut to the gym because the principal might caught him skipping class.

He passed the school clinic and thought that he should fake an illness to take a nap on one of the beds; he shrugged and opened the door, ready to greet the nurse but stopped as soon as he saw a familiar body slumped on one of the beds.

“Louis?” Harry had whisper in utter disbelief.

He was frozen in his spot unable to fully accept that the person lying on one of the clinic beds where students who are sick or has been caught up in an accident is brought is Louis, his Louis.

When he was finally able to move his legs, he had slowly moved towards him and shakily sat next to him. It seems Louis has already fallen asleep because he didn’t even react to Harry. Harry didn’t know what Louis was doing in there; he wasn’t the type like Harry to skip class and go to the clinic to sleep so he must have been sick.

And that’s when he noticed a cool compress pressed to his back. He as a little confused as to why it was there so he removed the compress and saw Louis exposed back, Harry had gasped in horror when he saw a much bigger bruise than the one on his face in Louis back, it was swelling and already turning an ugly shade of black and blue.

Louis had whimpered in his sleep when Harry tried to touch it, Harry knew and very well understood how a bruise felt on a person’s body because he had one at least every week because besides being really agile in boxing, he still hasn’t had full control of his freakishly long limbs so he had a few clumsy accidents here and there. He knew how uncomfortable it is and how every wrong move will bring a motherfucking ache and with the size on Louis’ back, Harry could just imagine the pain Louis was in.

When Louis was starting to get agitated in his sleep, Harry had placed the compress back to his back and brushed his hair that was already starting to grow out of his hair. Louis had sighed in relief before snuggling further on the bed but there was still a knot on his forehead which means he was still in pain but more bearable because of the compress.

Harry sighed and rubbed his face with his hands feeling exasperated because he couldn’t think of what could have happened for Louis to receive such massive bruise. Unlike Harry, Louis wasn’t that clumsy and he’s not into boxing like him which brings a lot more questions on to what have caused it.

Harry sat there for the whole first period overanalysing things because Louis’ welfare is not something to handle lightly, he had already promise that no such thing would happen to Louis but turns out he couldn’t be with him 24/7 to prevent it from happening.

The door opening had pulled Harry away from his thoughts and he was greeted by the nurse’s surprised face.

“Oh Harry, what are you doing here?” she asked in confusion after getting over her surprise.

She shouldn’t be surprise with the numerous times Harry had to visit but it had already been three months since he’s last visit so maybe that is a bit surprising.

He gave her a tight smile and fiddled with his fingers before glancing at Louis.

“I just visited Louis, is he ok?” he asked, hoping there wasn’t anything majorly wrong with Louis.

He was a bit overreacting because he knew if Louis’ life was in some sort of danger then he won’t be staying at the school clinic, rather he’d be sent to the hospital. Harry was grateful for it but that doesn’t mean he still likes the thought of him in here, Louis didn’t deserve to be here, he’s the least likely who deserves to be in here.

“Oh, Louis is fine at the moment, just a major bruising but I already gave him a few pain killers but he refused to say the reason why he got such bruise, I just came from the principal’s office to give his excuse letter. I called her parents so that they can pick him up so he could rest at home but they’re both out for work so he has to stay here until they come and get him.” She explains.

Harry clenched his fist on the bed sheet that Louis was lying on; he really hated how Louis refused to let anyone know whenever there’s a problem. Usually, Harry would have to force it out of him by engaging into a tickling battle and Louis would give up and spill everything up. Louis hated making everyone around him worry which hence why the bullying has started and it’s frustrating for Harry because he’s always worried in even the littlest things like Louis accidentally hitting his toe on the foot of a table or getting a paper cut. He was constantly mothering him, which is embarrassing if it weren’t for Louis and he had taken up that role because Louis’ parents were the worse. Harry despises Louis’ parents because everything important to them seems to revolve around money and work. Harry knew money has become a vital part in a human’s life because surviving isn’t that easy but like what he’s mother used to tell him before everything went to complete shit, people work to live and not live to work.

They forgot that they had a son and although Louis never complains about them not giving him much attention, he knew Louis sometimes feel neglected and he only got it if Louis kept his high marks and when Louis was hanging around Harry because they are arse deep angry at their son hanging out with a ‘trouble maker that has no future’. Harry had snorted when they told Louis about it; he was standing behind him at that moment.

He stared at Louis who was again trying to make himself comfortable in that old dingy low budget bed, he would feel more relaxed if he was in his own bed.

“Can I take him home instead?” he asked suddenly looking directly at the nurse who was once again had a shocked looked on her face.

“Oh, but don’t you have any classes?”

Harry wanted to roll his eyes but he’s playing the good responsible kid card and showing disrespect would make the nurse doubt him, like she doesn’t already with his reputation but there’s no harm in trying.

“I do, but I think Louis’ welfare is more important and I don’t have any major exams coming and I could always try and catch up with school work.” He used his most innocent voice and he would’ve thrown up if it were any other day and because it looks like it’s working, he could at least stomach this one more time.

“Well, since you put it that way, I guess I can work something out and you seem really concern about your friend Louis” She smiles and took a few paper out of her table and started signing what Harry suspects is his form to excuse himself on all his classes.

Harry had felt a bit off when the nurse mentioned the word friend because he certainly did not reciprocate the platonic feeling but he guessed he had to suck it up for now.

“I just have to drop this to the principal’s office really quick ok.” The nurse excused herself and left Harry and Louis to themselves.

Well, she left Harry because Louis was still too asleep to acknowledge him and that worried Harry more because now he can clearly see the dark bags under his eyes. Harry knew he wouldn’t go to bed unless finishing all unnecessary home works but he never sleeps that late up to the point where he’ll be exhausted the next day.

Why would Louis stay up late on a school day, did he have something important to do to break old habits?

Suddenly the door was being forced opened and he expects the nurse to come in but it was Niall, Liam and Zayn who wore identical worried expressions on their faces, more to Liam than the others though.

“Oh, Harry!” they chorused before rushing inside and pulling him in a hug.

Harry had smiled and let them hug him, it wasn’t his style but this people had warmed up on him and they seem really happy to see him which is odd because it’s only been a few days since they last seen each other, not years.

After they pulled away, Harry sat back down next to Louis and stared expectantly on his friends.

“Ok, so I think it’s about time I hear an explanation as to why Louis is lying on this bed and not in class slaving himself on Mr Callaghan’s lecture?” he asked with so much calmness that he patted himself on the back. He should be demanding it but decided not to do it because he might startle Louis awake.

They were all quiet and avoiding Harry’s gaze, they were either staring at the floor, the wall or at the ceiling and Harry was getting a bit suspicious. It seems there was a bigger picture in here and they were reluctant to tell him.

But before he could react, he was already being interrupted by the door opening and the nurse returning from her trip to the principal’s office.

“It seems to be getting more crowded in here as I return.” She laughs as she handed Louis’ things and a small plastic where Louis’ medicine are to Harry.

“You can take him home now, I advise for you to make him drink more painkillers at home before he sleeps so he wouldn’t feel too sore and he’ll be fine to return to school tomorrow.” She added.

I nodded and placed Louis’ medicine inside his bag.

“You can wake Louis now and –“the nurse wasn’t able to finish his sentence because as she turns around to look at her patient, Harry was already carrying him bridal style.

“No need Ms, I can carry him.” Harry answered.

“I’ll call a cab.” Zany quickly added before running outside quickly.

The nurse was still left staring at Harry’s retreating figure with Louis in his hold, Liam and Niall following them behind. She just thought it was the weirdest thing ever especially with Harry’s reputation but she just shrugged it off and went back to sorting out her files. Teenagers just get weirder and weirder each generation.




When the cab that Zayn called finally arrived, Harry had looked at them first before putting Louis inside.

“I don’t know what’s going on but I don’t like it, I want you to tell me every bit of detail tomorrow because it feels like Louis wouldn’t do it by himself so I’ll see you all tomorrow so be ready.” He warns, not quite threateningly but still with a bit of edge to make them spill.

He went inside the cab with Louis still in his arms, he made him snuggle up to his chest so he’s comfortable on his lap. He gave Louis’ address to the driver and ignored the odd looks he got in return. Maybe he finds it weird that there’s two boys cuddling in his cab and one of them seems unconscious. Harry just ignored it.

He stared at Louis sleeping form before letting out a sigh and kissing Louis’ already sweaty forehead and ignoring the tingle that he felt from the contact. There are far more pressing matters here than his feelings so he had to get his priorities straight and that is to find out what have caused this or better yet, who?




Chapter Text



Louis had no recollection of anything that happened before, he was too exhausted and his back was aching so badly. He was expecting to wake up at the school clinic with it’s over sterilized equipment and uncomfortable bed but was surprised when he noticed the unfamiliar environment. His heart started beating rather erratically at the thought of being in a foreign bed. He had no clue where he was or what he was doing here and he was panicking at the thought of getting kidnapped or taken by some stranger.

He scrambled to get out of the covers, he let out a pained shriek when his back was moved in an uncomfortable but ignored it because he had to leave right now.

The door was suddenly forced open and Louis closed his eyes thinking it would be an old man with a weird beard who had kidnapped him. He struggled to leave the bed but a hand had stopped him.

“Get away from me!” he shouted as he tried kicking the persons face but was stopped when the person hugged him from behind.

“Louis, Lou, calm down please.” The person whispered to his ear, all calm and collected unlike Louis.

Louis had stopped struggling for a bit because why did he know his name, was he a stalker.

“Lou, open your eyes, it’s me Harry.”

After he had mentioned the name, Louis was quick to open his eyes and he came face to face with Harry, his face etched with worry.

“Harry!?” he gasped in surprise before relaxing in his hold.

Louis had also found out the Harry was shirtless and only had a towel wrapped around his waist. It wasn’t his fault if his eyes started roaming down and he blushes bright red when his eyes landed into Harry’s perfectly sculpted stomach and god, he knew Harry was fit but not where Louis can almost imagine himself licking Harry’s abs.

Louis eyes widened when the thought crosses his mind, what was happening to him? Why was he having these thoughts about Harry! His best friend Harry!

“Lou! Are you ok, why is your face all red!” Harry asked, he seems to be panicking as well.

Louis coughed in embarrassment and removed Harry arm that was still wrapped around him. Everything was fine, maybe he was just a bit off after being too exhausted or maybe the pain killers that the nurse had given him had some side effect that causes you to hallucinate and start lusting over your best friend. Surely that was the reason behind it.

“I’m ok Harry, where am I and why am I here?” he asked instead.

He could never admit to Harry his previous thoughts, Harry might think something was terribly wrong with Louis.

“Oh, um well you were sent to the clinic for major bruising on your back and the nurse said that it would be best if you could rest at home and your parents needed to pick you up but they were busy so I had to take you instead.” Harry explained.

“Oh.” Louis muttered as he stared at the covers sadly. Of course his parents were busy and didn’t even mind leaving work to make sure Louis was alright. It doesn’t matter right; he should already be used to it because that’s how things worked.

But wait, he wasn’t home because this wasn’t his bed.

“I’m not at home though.” He said, forgetting about his parents because that would just depress him more and probably worry Harry as well.

“No, your house was locked and your neighbour refuses to give the keys to your house so I brought you at my place.” Harry answered.

So he was at Harry’s house, how strange. Harry never really brought him here because Louis’ parents still does not trust him enough to spend some time with Harry He and Harry would either hang out in school or at places outside their homes.

“I’m sorry I panicked, I didn’t know where I was and thought I was kidnapped by a bearded old man.” Louis shrugged, his eyes roaming around Harry’s room because this was like a different new world for him.

They say a person’s room can give you a vague description of who a person really was but Louis can’t seem to do that with Harry’s. Harry’s room was bare, like completely bare, with a single small bed next to a barely opened window and a dresser on the side, an old door which he assumes is the bathroom and another more door that leads outside.

He was taken out from his nosy musing in Harry’s room by Harry himself who Louis almost forgot is sitting a few feet away in only a towel. Damn it.

“Do I look like a bearded old man to you?” Harry grinned cheekily.

More like a superhot runaway model’ Louis thought to himself rather dreamily.

When the logical part of his brain had fully registered the thing that the hormonal part of his brain had created, he was again turning into different shades of red. Oh my god, where were all this thoughts about Harry coming from?

“Hey, are you sure you’re ok? You’re starting to look red again.” Harry asked again in deep worry.

Harry’s brow were scrunched up creating an amusing look and Louis should make fun of him but instead he was thinking how cute Harry looked like right now and how he suddenly want to take a picture of him that he could stare at every day.

 “I’m ok, just a bit off.” Louis muttered under his breath.

He quickly looked away and cursed himself mentally because this was getting out of hand. What the hell was wrong with him?

He felt the bed move and he glanced at Harry who has now stood up, giving Louis the perfect view of his body.

“Well ok, I was in the middle of the shower when I heard you scream. I thought something happened to you.” Harry said, not noticing that Louis was staring at his collar bones intently. He was too busy worrying about Louis to notice Louis’ odd actions.

I wonder what it feels like to share a shower with Harry’ Louis had asked himself.

He wanted to scream and pull his hair out of his head but decided that his back hurts to much to finish the task.

“Um, ok, I’ll just lie down for a few minutes, I just feel weird.” Louis had said as he pulled the covers over his face to hide his flaming red cheeks.

He didn’t dare look at what Harry was doing but he knew he must be staring at him with a weird out look. Louis would do the same if he can because he was confused with everything and he can’t control the fast beating of his heart.

Did he manage to hit his head earlier, surely he was experiencing a mild case of concussion or maybe he was in a coma and this was just a dream.

He was starting to zone out once again and vaguely heard Harry talking.

“Ok, just call me if you need something ok.” He stated with a careful tone.

He must really think that Louis was losing his damn mind.

“Right, don’t worry Harry.” Louis had added, burrowing his face on Harry’s pillow further.

He should be a bit grossed out because the pillow might have sweat or Harry’s drool in it but as he inhaled the manly scent that fits Harry, he can’t help but take an extra sniff.

He heard someone walking and Harry must be getting back to his shower and Louis remembered that he still hasn’t thanked Harry for everything he did today. He quickly pulled the covers off his face to call out on Harry.

“Wait, Harry.”

Harry stopped mid step and turn to look at Louis. “Yeah Lou?” He had asked him.

Louis suddenly felt shy and embarrassed because Harry was literally looking out for him and why does it feel like he’s such a burden to him, like he was his responsibility.

“Thank you for you know… for taking care of me and I’m sorry for bothering you all of the sudden.” He had sighed sadly.

He did not want things like this happening; it was obvious how Harry was worried about him. He shouldn’t be though; Harry had already done too much for him. He shouldn’t act like such a liability all the time; Harry might grow tired of him if this continues.

He was expecting Harry to laugh or maybe mock him but with confident strides, Harry had walked closer to the bed where Louis was all wrapped up in his covers and leaned down to look straight at Louis’ eyes.

Louis had held his breath as he stared at Harry, his heart plummeting in his chest and his stomach exploding in butterflies. What was happening with him.

“You are never a bother to me Louis Tomlinson.” Harry smiled at him and ruffled his hair.

He then stood up from his crouched position and walked away to the bathroom, the door closes with a click and Louis was left in Harry’s room, alone and a million different emotions.




Louis was able to take a nap for a few hours after pondering for so long with how he was acting, he had come up to the conclusion that he was just deliriously exhausted to start thinking such things about Harry. Now that he had his much needed rest and his new dose of pain killers, he was up and feeling normal again.

He had woken up and was expecting to see Harry but he wasn’t inside the room. He left Harry’s bed and checked the bathroom but it was also just s empty.

He had heard some humming from outside and decided to follow it and it led him to the kitchen where Harry was standing by the stove wearing a white shirt and just boxers.

Louis had closed his eyes and averted them to look away from Harry’s muscled back; he should not be staring at it in the first place. The humming stopped and Harry must have already noticed him standing by the door. He looks back to where Harry was standing and saw him looking at him with a warm smile.

“Hey, you’re awake. Go sit down, I prepared some pasta for lunch.” Harry had greeted him.

Louis’ stomach then let out a growl informing him that he was in fact really hungry. Harry just chuckled and continued stirring the pot where the sauce was still cooking.

Louis had just obediently followed Harry’s instruction and took a seat on one of the chairs near the small dining table.

While Harry was too busy preparing their lunch, Louis had let himself look around Harry’s kitchen.

Harry’s kitchen was much more different than Harry’s bedroom, even if it was a little small it was still filled with various cooking items from frying pans, to mixing bowls and even a small little oven where Louis can see was on and a tray full of cookies are baking.

He was suddenly very excited on the prospect of eating newly baked cookies. He suddenly wondered who had made them, did Harry live with someone.

“Hey Harry, do you live with someone?” he asked out of curiosity.

“Nope.” He answered shortly, too focused on pouring sauce on the plate where the pasta lay.

Louis was again curious to ask about Harry’s family but a plate full of well cooked pasta was placed in front of him and one whip from the food had made him forget about his question.

He was quick to dive in his food, Harry chastising him about it still being hot but Louis didn’t mind the burn especially when his taste buds got the taste of Harry’s cooking.

“Oh my god, this is delicious Harry; I never thought you could cook.” He moaned after taking forkful after forkful of pasta.

He probably looked quite messy right now but he was really hungry and the food was delicious, don’t judge him.

“I live alone so I need to learn to take care of myself.” Harry said to answer Louis’ previous question.

 “Oh, I can’t imagine myself living alone.” Louis added because he knew he really can’t.

Although that was a bit ironic because he was always being left alone to himself at home but it, there’s a difference to having a family that’s always gone and a family that’s literally gone.

“You get used to it.” Harry shrugged.

Louis had stopped midway from taking another forkful as he stared at Harry who was staring intently at his plate, not quite eating but just pushing the food around. He frowned and placed his fork down.

He was going to ask Harry about his weird behaviour but Harry had beaten him up to it. He lifted his head to look at Louis and raised one questioning eyebrow. Louis has a hunch that he didn’t like where this was going.

Had Harry noticed him being weird? Or did he magically possessed some mind reading powers and had figured out the thoughts coming out of Louis’ mind about lusting over him. Louis shivered at the thought of Harry finding out about it.

“So do you mind explaining why you were sent to the clinic with a massive bruise in your back?” was Harry’s question that had caught him more off guard.

He almost forgot about the bruise on his back and the reason behind it.

Surely Harry can’t find out about what happened earlier in school. He will think Louis was pathetic to let some boys push him around, he wasn’t even able to defend himself and if it wasn’t for Liam, Zayn and Niall then he’d officially became a punching bag.

So no, Harry should not hear about it.

“Um, I tripped?” was all his mind was able to come up with.

Great going Tomlinson’  he thought to  himself.

Harry seemed unfazed like he knew Louis was going to come up with some bullshit lies, Louis was literally doomed.

“Either you are definitely clumsy which I’m sure you’re not, and you aren’t quite confident with your answer Louis.” Harry continued.

Harry was starting to have this dark look in his eyes and Louis has yet to see this expression, it was far darker and more intense than the look Harry gives to the people he would love to hurt.

“It’s nothing really; you don’t need to worry about me anymore.” Louis replied quickly, scared because he thought Harry was mad at him.

But Harry didn’t lash out on him, instead the look changed into something soft and mellow. Like Harry had realized something and was trying to stop himself from getting his bad temper.

He really does have the worse temper ever.

Harry just stared at Louis for a few moments; the looks making Louis shudder as he waits for Harry’s reply.

When he slowly opened his eyes, he was expecting for a smart comeback but the words that left Harry’s lips were something Louis will have a hard time forgetting.

“That’s the problem though, I always worry about you.” He muttered softly, like Louis was a caged animal that would run away at any chance he gets.

“I..I don’t understand…I…what?” Louis asked, words getting jumbled in his mouth.

Harry groaned and picked the plates from the table, it seems he was already done with his food even if it’s almost untouched.

Louis followed Harry and carried his own empty plate; he needed some answers from Harry because he was left with more questions that even if he tried studying it overnight will be left unanswered. He couldn’t think of taking this type of quiz from people, he’d fail miserably.

Harry had just stood by the sink, hand grasping the counter tightly and head bowed in frustration.

“Harry, I literally don’t get it.” Louis added, equally frustrated because he didn’t like being left in the dark.

Harry was keeping something from him it really annoys Louis.

Everything happened so fast after that because Louis’ mind was too busy searching for possible answers to Harry’s weird attitude and everything was a blur. First Harry was just ignoring him and Louis was trying to get his attention and then Harry was pulling him closer to him and Louis vaguely realized that Harry’s face was inching closer to his and there were lips pressing against his.

Louis’ mind grew blank after that but his senses had heightened, he felt Harry’s warm hands rubbing against the bruise on his back in a soft yet caring way, it stings but Louis thought it was a good sting and how Harry’s lips weren’t soft but was a bit rough due to them being overly chewed by Harry.

Louis also didn’t notice himself closing his eyes because he was too far gone with the kiss. His own arms going in its own accord as they wrapped themselves around Harry’s neck, pulling at the ends of the hairs in Harry’s back.

Louis can feel something exploding deep inside him but he didn’t care, because he was kissing someone, he was kissing Harry.

It felt hours but it was probably just seconds, the kiss wasn’t that steamy, there wasn’t even tongue involved but Louis was literally left in a sort of daze.  Like a drunken daze.

Harry had pulled away and stared at Louis’ still clouded eyes; he smirked and placed his hand over Louis’ cheek, caressing his wet lips.

“You’re supposed to be smart Louis.” Harry had murmured quietly before pulling Louis in another kiss.





Chapter Text

“You like me!?” Louis had asked for probably the twentieth time since Harry had tried explaining the reason why he had kissed him in the first place.

Harry should be annoyed but he felt nothing but complete adoration towards the boy. His heart was still crazily beating after he had pulled away from his kiss with Louis. If air wasn’t that necessary for living, he’d be content with just staying there and memorising the feel of Louis’ soft lips against him.

It was far too surreal, the kiss was better than anything he’d imagined. He had dreamed and fantasized it too often but the countless dreaming is nothing compared to the real thing. He had thought Louis’ lips were soft but not the kind of soft and sticky that most girls have because of the lipstick they wore and not similar to an ordinary guy because other guys have dry rough lips that’s uncomfortable to kiss. Louis’ lips were perfect and Harry could probably create a million sonatas just from those luscious lips.

“Are you ok Harry?” Louis squeaked.

They had situated themselves in Harry’s cramped living room, Louis had felt too weak in the knees to physically move and Harry had to carry him

The kiss was perfect but they had a lot to talk about. This wasn’t some movie where if two people kissed then they’ll live happy ever after, no, it wasn’t some teenage cliché story. Problems might actually start occurring and Harry would be damned if his and Louis’ friendship gets affected most.

“Yes, Lou I like you, probably more than you could imagine.” Harry explained calmly, trying to prevent Louis from freaking himself out.

He knew very well how oblivious Louis is but not to the extent where he had zero clue about Harry’s feelings.

“Um…I just...i don’” Louis was fiddling nervously with his fingers, his brows knitted with uncertainty.

Harry would be worried if this actually starts fucking up Louis’ head but Louis had kissed him back, rather vigorously he might add so it means even if Louis doesn’t realize he’s own feelings, he still had some. He wouldn’t kiss Harry back if he just saw him as a friend right?

Harry took Louis hand and intertwined them with his own. Louis had turn into a terrible shade of red but he didn’t pull back, he was actually staring at their intertwined hands with complete amazement and wonder.

“Listen Louis, I know this might come shocking to you but I really really like you and you don’t have to say that you feel the same way this instant. I’m going to do this right and proper and I’m not going to rush you into things you’re not completely comfortable. If you don’t feel the same then that’s ok, I value our friendship but I was hoping we could be more.” Harry had proclaimed.

Louis had stared at Harry, his eyes wide and cheeks still red but a smile was starting to make its way on his face and Harry had felt something painful being pulled away from his chest.

“Is that a yes?” Harry asked eagerly, grinning widely at Louis.

Louis blushed even redder and Harry felt a little worried because that’s not normal right? But Louis was then smiling back at him and he gave him a small shy nod. Harry was literally bursting inside with happiness and he couldn’t control himself when he stood up from the sofa and jumped crazily in happiness while fist bumping the air.

While he was busy with his little celebrating, Louis had laughed and watched Harry as he made a complete fool out of himself.

“You’re acting like I just said yes to a marriage proposal Hazza.” Louis had giggled.

Harry stopped for a minute to stare at a giggling Louis and this is how Louis should look every day, happy and carefree without a single worry to the world.

“Don’t put ideas in my head Lou, I need to properly court you first and take you on a date and ask you to be my boyfriend before I even propose.” Harry had joked, winking at Louis who again had turn into various shades of red.

Harry had actually felt pity towards the blushing boy and decided to stop teasing him, maybe Louis did find it shocking the Harry had liked him in the first place which Harry think is completely absurd because Louis should be every ones dream. He was kind, awfully smart and not to mention hot.

Like painstakingly hot that Harry had to sometimes restrain himself from doing non friendly things to Louis’ body. Especially now that he had a taste of Louis’ mouth that he’s having a hard time focusing on not freaking Louis out and snogging him senseless on his couch.

He shook his head to try and erase the cloudiness that was taking over his head and focused on Louis instead, he took a sit next to him and let out a big exhale.

No matter how perfect today has become Harry had to focus on more pressing matters such as Louis’ accident in school. He had the biggest hunch that the cause of said bruise on Louis’ back is a person, not just Louis’ clumsiness.

“I need you to be honest with me Lou.” He stated seriously.

Louis had suddenly gone a little frigid and Harry cursed himself for putting him in such an uncomfortable state.

“O-Ok.” Louis had stuttered in reply.

He took his hand, rubbing soothing circles over it to try and assure him that everything is fine and he should relax. Louis did find a bit of comfort from Harry’s gesture.

“What happened with your back, and don’t try to lie please. I will beat up literally everyone if it means knowing the truth.” Harry had said, determined to inflict as much pain as possible to the culprit behind this.

“Don’t do that!” Louis pleaded.

Harry had frowned, he knew Louis wouldn’t exactly agree with it but he was hoping to change his mind.

“Then explain.” Harry had insisted.

Louis was quiet for a while and Harry was trying not to pressure him too much but he was getting antsy himself. Could Louis be revealing something big or was he threatened to not speak of a word about the incident. Harry seriously despises secrets.

“Do you remember when you first saved me at the hallway, when a group of boys kept pushing and beating me?” Louis suddenly spoke.

It had caught Harry a little off guard but before he knew it, he was already seeing red. How dare those pathetic people do this to his Louis?

“What the fuck, did they do this to you?! I literally taught them a lesson I can’t believe they-“ Harry was quickly cut off by Louis on his mid rant.

“Wait, I’m not finished Harry, calm down and let me explain ok.”

Harry was literally fuming and he wasn’t that great with handling his temper but Louis’ presence had a soothing effect on him so he tried burying the urge to go and punch someone from that group of immature teenagers who get the kicks from bullying people who would never fight them back.

Harry was sure he had hurt too many people to properly count but never to those who didn't deserve a punch in the face.

“So um, well I’m not lying, they weren’t the reason I had this bruise, they’re pretty scared of you Haz.” Louis informed Harry.

Harry had taken several relaxing breaths because his anger should not be directed to Louis. Maybe to some unsuspecting stranger but never to Louis.

“That’s good but I’m still not getting any answers.”

“It was Blake.” Louis mumbled.

“Who the hell is Blake?” Harry was deeply confused on to who this person was.

He tried recalling all the names of those people who bullied Louis’ before but none of them were named Blake.

“I don’t think you’ve met him, you moved here the same time when Blake transferred to another state, you know in the movies when the protagonist gets bullied by that one person since they were little?” Louis said instead of answering Harry's earlier question.

Unlike Louis, Harry had to try extra harder to understand thingsthings but Louis was getting a bit off topic and Harry is having a hard time following.

“Um I guess?”

Louis continued with his story and Harry can pratically feel the sadness radiating from Louis. It seems that recalling the events is hard for him, Harry can only imagine.

“Well mine’s Blake, I was really glad when I heard the news that he’d go away but I saw him this morning and he pushed me. I hit my back on the locker pretty hard and that’s why I got the bruise.” Louis had mumbled silently that Harry had to scoot a little closer to understand what he was saying.

When he had finally understood what this Blake did to Louis, Harry was already standing up and angrily pacing in front of Louis. He needed a moment to collect his thoughts and not just go on a Blake hunt and possibly a killing spree.

“I’m really starting to loathe this Blake person, tell me his address and I will give him a visit.” Harry had grunted, the urge to hit something was growing by the minuteminute and he should take note to stop by at the gym this evening.

Louis had also stood up from his seat with a panicked expression on his face.

“No! You can’t Harry! Blake’s dad is like really powerful and he can send you to jail if you hurt his son.” he begged.

Harry was slightly annoyed because it seems Louis is protecting this person even though he deserves something worse.

“I don’t really care; he’s been bullying you since you were a child Louis he deserves a big beating himself.” Harry muttered angrily and he was about to rush outside to cool himself down when Louis moved quickly to stop him, hugging him tightly from behind.

“But you can’t go to jail because of that, I won’t let you.” Louis continued to plead on his back.

“I don’t really understand why you think I’m just gonna sit and watch.” Harry sighed, Louis really has that big of a control on Harry. Just his hold on his arm was already grounding him and helping him calm down.

It was both amazing and scary because it seems he's too dependent on Louis.

“I wouldn’t handle well if you’re in jail either and how would you take me on a date if you get arrested.” Louis had said which made Harry sag completely in his hold.

“God dammit, the things you do to me Louis.” He whispered to himself, Louis tightened his hold on Harry's chest which means he must have heard him.

Harry is kind of enjoying the contact, he could probably stay right here forever and hr wouldn't have a problem.

“Blake has no clue of who you are and maybe if he sees me with you then he’ll stop like what his friends did before.” Louis went on, it seems he also doesn't mind hugging Harry to try and prevent him from leaving and doing god knows what.

“I’m pretty sure they stopped because I sent them all to the ER.” Harry shrugged at the memory. He actually enjoyed teaching those jerks a lesson.

Louis slowly pulled his arms away from Harry and Harry had frowned at the sudden lost of contact but it was only for a minute because Louis was suddenly hugging him again, this time from the front and not his back.

Harry actually preferred this one because he can land several kisses on Louis hair as much as he wanted.

“I know, I’m still very frightened about the things you can do to a person but I know you’ll never use them against me.” Louis admitted as he pressed his ear on Harry's chest.

Harry was sure Louis could hear the sudden beating of his heart, hell his neighbors probably heard them too.

“I would never hurt you.” Harry was silently pleading for Louis to believe that he would never dare to hurt him, physically or emotionally. He would rather jump from a fifty floored building than do such this to him.

Louis pulled his head away from Harry's chest to look at him, grinning from ear to ear.

“I believe you, you’re my protector right? Like my knight in shining armor?” His tone waswas teasing.

“That’s pretty cheesy but I’ll take what I can get.” Harry snorted as Louis let out a delighted giggle.

They just stood there, at the middle of Harry's crappy living room and staring at each other like two lovesick fools.

“I still can’t believe you like me.” Louis sighed, shaking his head as if he still can't understand Harry's feelings towards him.

“You’re insufferable do you know that.” Harry flicked his nose gently which earned an annoyed huff from Louis.

“But you still want to take me on a date right?”

Harry sighed and pulled Louis face towards him, Louis’ breath hitched and he closed his eyes. Harry had stopped pulling Louis to him when his face was an inch away from Louis’ own. He smirked and rubbed the tip of his nose to Louis’ and Louis literally shivered at the contact.

Slowly he opened his eyes and stared at Harry in awe. The familiar blush rushing to his cheeks but he was smiling and then bursting into fits of giggles.

“I can’t believe you just gave me an Eskimo kiss, what are you? Five?” Louis laughed.

“Heey, I believe romantic is the right term.” Harry rolled his eyes and pulled Louis to the sofa to snog the life out of him.

Louis had squeaked when he landed on his back and Harry had taken his place on top of him, not fully lying down and putting his weight on Louis. He didn't want to squish him.

Louis had once again turn into an overly riped tomato and it was so endearing that Harry was having a hard time controlling the fond look directed to Louis.

"You're so cute." Harry had gushed, loving at how Louis was squirming underneath

"Um.. Thank you." He would've blushed if it was possible, he was already sort of burning.

"I'm going to kiss you now." Harry stated and leaned down to capture Louis' lips with his own and Louis following shortly.

Harry thinks he can live with this.

Louis suddenly let out a little moan which made Harry groan.

Yep, Harry can definitely live with this.





Chapter Text




Louis was getting kind of worried and ridiculously troubled at the thought of going back to school.

He had a few days off after his parents found out about his bruises and demanded that he stay at home until it heals. The school didn’t mind that much mainly because Louis was on top of his class and missing a few days won’t really affect his grades that much.

Of course he was a bit glad of having to prolong the inevitable confrontation with Blake in school but he was also a bit sad about not being able to see Harry.

Just the mention of his name in his thoughts brings a sort of giddiness in Louis that makes him forget about Blake. It’s safe to say that this was a whole new thing for him, or maybe not. Maybe all this time he was just too blind to see and too stupid to realize his feelings that was there all along. Louis had once believed that so called feelings that people refer to as love is just a figment of a person’s wild imagination caused by feeling lonely. He thought it was just a mock emotion that people created to experience joy and happiness for a limited period of time.

He always thought whenever he would read romantic novels that the thing most fictional characters mention as this so called love was a bit overrated. He even thought that the story portrayed in movies were equally unbelievable and were just made to make money, lots and lots of money out of people who lived their lives dreaming of the perfect love story. The hopeless romantic as they say.

How ironic because now he was one of them and this was all Harry Edward Styles’ fault.

Louis was pulled away from his ‘Harry Trance’ by a sudden knock on his door.

He turns his gaze towards his bedroom door just in time to see his mom peaking inside. When she saw Louis, she stepped inside his room and placed his folded clothes at the end of his bed.

“You had a visitor dear.” She said after Louis thanked her for bringing his clothes.

 “Really? Who?” He asked, sitting upright on his bed.

Her mom started moving around his room, picking up all the discarded clothing lying around on his bedroom floor.

“It’s Harry.” She said, her lips pressed in a thin line.

 “Harry! Where is he?” Louis was suddenly bolting out of his bed, he ran to the window to try and see if the curly haired boy was really here but to his disappointment, there was no one out front.

He turned towards his mom who was frowning at a pair of mismatched socks and was not paying attention completely on Louis.

“I sent him home, told him you weren’t allowed to have visitors because you have school tomorrow.” She answered with a nonchalant shrug that made Louis frustrated.

Seriously, his mom can be the worse sometimes.

“Mom! Why would you do that!” Louis whined at his mom.

 “I’m sorry dear but how many times do I have to tell you to not hang around the likes of him.” She explained as if Louis would just understand it that simply, that a worth of someone can be based solely from their outside appearance alone.

Louis’ mother can sometimes be the most typical judgmental parent, who cringes at the sight of piercings and tattoos, although Harry didn’t have any piercing, the tattoo on his arm is glaringly obvious.

“There is nothing wrong with Harry.” He insisted.

His mother didn’t know how Harry had been protecting him from years of torment throughout his life, Harry who has been his support system during his competitions when his parents rarely make an appearance and Harry who just admitted to having feelings for Louis and wanted to take him on a date.

He was again interrupted with his inner ‘Harry worship’ by his mom.

“Everything is wrong with that boy.” She said disapprovingly.

Louis was all about ignoring things that made him annoyingly angry, he prefers taking the calmer route but the way his mom is dismissing everything just because of her first impression with Harry is making him unexplainably mad.

“You can’t just judge a person just by his looks mom.” He insisted. He wanted to make his mom understand. He actually really wanted his mom to like Harry and Harry had defended him many times from lots of people, maybe it’s about time he does the same for him.

“I know enough about him.” Was his mom’s vague reply.

Louis groaned and went back to his bed, groaning at his pillow because his mom was starting to get on his nerves.

“Why can’t you just give him a chance?” He mumbled sadly after taking a few calming breaths. This was his mother, the person who had carried him for nine months and had given birth to him so he deserves all the respect from Louis. He shouldn’t snap or talk back to her even though he really really wanted to.

There was a pregnant pause, with Louis just staring straight on his green painted walls and his mom somewhere around his room. Louis doesn’t bother on looking at her because it would just make him feel bad about acting out like such a child.

“You really care for this boy then?” Her mom asked suddenly which made Louis to sit up straight on his bed.

“I do mom.” He answered seriously.

Louis wanted her to understand how much Harry means to him.

His mom just stared at him before letting out a sigh and taking a seat on his bed.

“Hmm, well that’s odd. You never cared enough about something since your last pet gerbil.” She added.

Louis groaned and face palmed himself, why would his mom say that? Leonardo was pretty special but he died because his dad forgot to feed him when he and his mom went to visit his Nan. That was a pretty emotional time for ten year old Louis but something’s not right when his pet gerbil is compared to Harry. Louis wouldn’t know what he’d do if Harry just disappeared and left.

“Harry is not just something or a pet mom, he’s a person.” He reasoned out, slightly getting really defensive.

His mother must have noticed the slight rise on Louis’ tone because she was furrowing her brows and rubbing Louis’ shoulder.

“Alright, alright, calm down Louis, I didn’t mean it that way.” Her mom reassured her.

“I’m sorry for raising my voice on you.” He apologized quickly; he didn’t want to upset his mom just because he was getting frustrated.

It’s just so difficult to express what you feel on a particular subject without offending someone.

“It’s ok, I’m sorry too.”

He lifted his head to stare wide eyed at his mom; she was apologizing, which in his book is a good thing.

She let out a sigh but it wasn’t condescending, she was trying to fight off a smile.

“Fine, if it’ll make you feel better. I’ll let you hang out with that boy but I need you to promise me that this wouldn’t affect your performance in school. One grade slip and I’ll make sure you’ll never see him again.” She was trying to sound stern and intimidating but the look of pure fondness on her face was too obvious.

Louis didn’t know what to do but jump to hug her afterwards.

Louis didn’t know what was so different today but he rarely sees this side of his mom, too much work and less time with him but today’s seems special.

“For real!” Louis would never admit how he squealed rather unmanly on his mom.

“Yes, but promise me.”

Louis was nodding so quickly he was getting a bit dizzy.

“Yes, oh my god, mom ok, I promise! I doubt Harry would make me fail my subjects. He’s actually the one who encourages me to join more extracurricular activities that would look great on my college application.” He said with a proud smile, Harry did help him greatly in a lot of stuff which he might have said to gain his mother’s approval.

This was successful with the way her mom’s eyes light up. She always seems to do that when the topic is about Louis’ future.

“Oh, I wasn’t aware of that.”

Louis thinks that would have done the trick to get Harry on his mom’s good side.

“He’s really not that bad mom.” He continues.

“Fine, you should invite him to dinner sometimes.” She says after a moment.

Louis never felt more proud of himself, he finally did it. He had successfully made his mom to remotely like Harry and she even invited him for dinner, yep, Louis deserves a pat on the back.

“Sure, He’d love that and maybe he can bring some of his dish too because he’s such a good cook.”

Louis eyes widen when the words left his mouth, Harry only let him taste his food once and never really asked if he can cook anything fancy, his mom and dad were very picky with their meals.

“Oh, I didn’t know he could cook.” The surprise was evident on her face but she looks delighted upon hearing yet another good characteristic from Harry.

Louis just continued though.

“He’s good at a lot of things mom.”

“Well that’s good to hear then.” She seems very pleased indeed.

She stood up and kissed Louis’ cheek.

“OK, I’ll leave you now and make sure you have an early rest, you have school tomorrow.”

Louis was literally feeling rather elated at having accomplished a lot of things today.

“Ok mom.” He beams.

He couldn’t wait to tell Harry.




Louis was disappointed.

It turns out he couldn’t tell Harry all about it because he didn’t go to school. Like before, there wasn’t a single text about his whereabouts and he was close to skipping class and getting Harry but he had a Biology quiz that he couldn’t miss.

Louis would just have to suffer without Harry today. Zayn, Liam and Niall were with him the whole day and he knew why they refused to leave him alone. Blake was still around, like a hungry predator waiting to attack Louis when he gets the chance.

It was a bit dramatic and Louis knew the guy probably has other stuffs to do besides torments Louis’ life and he doesn’t feel a bit threatened which is rather surprising.

He didn’t know what was wrong with him but seeing Blake glaring at him across the hall did nothing to falter his steps. Or maybe he was acting all tough because he had his friends back but who knows right.

He just wanted to talk to Harry and tell him about his rather big accomplishment at home but he was getting a bit annoyed because he still hadn’t heard anything from him. Was Harry mad because Louis’ mom kicked him out again yesterday? Louis hoped he wasn’t that pissed.

It was through lunch when Louis was too busy playing with his food that Niall spoke about something.

“Damn, I knew it!” he exclaims.

Everyone stopped what they were doing to stare at the blonde haired lad, even Louis who was too preoccupied with his thoughts turn to look at Niall questioningly.

“What’s wrong Niall?” Liam asked.

Niall’s wide eyes focused on Louis.

“I forgot to tell you but I saw Harry yesterday on my way home, he’s a bit grumpy but he said he wouldn’t be able to go to school today because he had a match with some George guy on Paul’s gym and he couldn’t text you because his phone was missing.”

Louis dropped his spoon and lightly punched Niall’s arm with a small laugh.

“Why didn’t you tell it earlier Niall, I got worried that Harry hated me because my mom kicked him out.”

“So Harry came by your house to say it directly then?” Liam

“Probably.” Zayn said with a grin.

Louis didn’t understand why Zayn was grinning at him like that. But then it seems Zayn was up to something because something seems to cross his mind and then he was smirking.

“Hey, why don’t we go by the gym to see him?”

“I think that’s a great idea!” Niall cheers with a mouthful of chips, making it more difficult to understand what he was saying. His eyes widen again when he started coughing terribly. Liam was quick to push his water bottle on Niall with a chastising look on his face.

Louis laughed at Liam’s disappointed face but then he realized what Zayn was implying and he was quick to voice out his sudden worry.

“We’re not skipping class are we?”

Zayn merely rolled his eyes at Louis but you can clearly see the fond look directed to the overly achieving boy.

“Of course not Lou, we’ll go after school.”


Louis felt immensely better after knowing that he wouldn’t have to do something terrible such as skipping class in order to see and finally talk to Harry.

Louis didn’t know if there was something going on with him and Harry but they did kiss a few times and both liked it and Harry said that they’ll take things slow so he wouldn’t get overwhelmed.

Louis might or might not be slowly falling for him.

Chapter Text

“Woah Styles, calm down. You’re going to ruin another bag if you keep punching like that.” Paul said disapprovingly from Harry’s right.

Harry closed his eyes and lowered his hands which were aching. He was getting a bit antsy and aggressive since yesterday after Louis’ mom had slammed their door on his face.

He knew Louis’ parents hated him, they never fail to remind Harry whenever he would try and visit Louis but he hadn’t had any chance to talk to Louis since his phone was still missing.

There’s also a deep ache on his guts at not being able to see Louis which is yet another reason for his bad mood.

Everyone in the gym had deemed it dangerous to be near him that’s why he has the ringside all to himself and only Paul was brave enough to approach him, which he only did because he was afraid Harry would destroy yet another one of his gym equipment’s. Those are expensive dammit!

“Sorry Paul, just getting carried away.”

“Well, then take a breather. You can’t act like that on your fight, you’ll kill the poor lad who’s up against you.” Paul had reminded him before clapping his shoulder and walking away.

Harry took a deep breath and removed the bandage wrapped around his knuckles which were a bit raw and bruised. He frowned at himself, he didn’t even feel anything. He must have been really hitting the bag too hard and now it’s all numb. It will surely hurt like a real bitch soon.

“Hey Styles!” a voice called from the front. It was Jeffrey, Paul’s assistance.

“Yep?” He asked as he grabbed his water bottle and pouring its contents to his face to cool himself a little.

He was sweating like a pig.

“Someone in here is looking for you.” Jeffrey continued.

Harry stopped and shook his head to get the water out of his hair and curiously turned to look at the person Jeffrey was referring to.

He didn’t usually have visitors, if it wasn’t obvious; Harry was not the nicest person…well except for Louis.

Louis is always an exemption.

Harry was sure he’d a saint if Louis requested but he doubted that he would. Louis had accepted Harry for what he truly is, tattoos and all.

And there he was.

The subject of Harry’s thoughts is right there, standing next to Jeffrey is none other than Louis, Louis who was all red and blushing.

Harry did not understand how, but he felt his mood went from 0 to a 100 with just one look. How the fuck is that even possible.

He smiled wildly and snatched a clean towel from the rack to wipe off his disgusting body, he knew that he should hit the shower first but it can wait.

He jogged towards him after making sure that he wasn’t wet anymore, Jeffrey was staring at him oddly but he just gave him a glare that made the poor guy jump and run leaving him and Louis alone.

He then returned his attention to Louis who seems to be too fascinated to stare at the tiled floor to look at Harry directly.

“Um, are you ok Louis?”

“I-I’m f-fine.” Louis stuttered.

Harry grew worried thinking that something was terribly wrong with Louis. He slowly placed his hands over his face and carefully lifted angled it towards him so he can look directly at his face.

Harry did not know why Louis’ face was all red and he really can’t seem to make himself look directly at Harry’s eyes which made Harry frown harder.

“Did I do something wrong?” Harry voiced out his concern.

Did he do something? Did he accidentally upset Louis and he was not aware of it?

Louis’ eyes grew as he stepped away from Harry, shaking his head furiously, Harry honestly did not understand what was happening, that is until Zayn appeared from behind next to a laughing Niall and a giggling Liam.

“You guys are pretty pathetic.” Zayn said, adoration clear on his voice.

“Hahahah this is rich, kindly hide your boner Louis.” Niall guffawed.

Louis’ face grew extremely red as he stared at Niall, horrified at his friends choice of words.

“SHUT UP NIALL!” Louis shouted as he ran to the nearest bathroom to hide and probably die of shame.

Harry was again left confused and he glared expectantly at his friends, he needed some quick answers.

“You’re so dense Harry.”


“You’re half naked and you literary did the splashing water thingy on your body and Louis was here watching and drooling and you were so concerned about something else to even notice how horny he got.” Zayn said with a knowing smirk.


Well that changes everything.

Niall was just about to make another dirty joke when they suddenly heard a loud shout from the bathroom.

Harry was quick to run to the bathroom because Louis was there and something must have happen and fuck, what the hell could have happened.

Zayn, Liam, Niall and Paul were also hot on his heels but not as fast as him. He tried to open the door but was surprised to find it locked, the bathroom door was not supposed to be locked because anyone in the gym can use it.

Did Louis lock the door?

 He knocked several times to find out if Louis was inside and ok but he was not able to get a response but he was hearing something from inside, some weird shuffling noises.

A gruff voice spoke from inside and surely that was not Louis.

“I’m currently busy man, maybe you should use the bathroom upstairs.” He said, voice a bit strained.

So Louis really wasn’t inside, there was another dude currently locked up inside.

He didn’t know what to make of it and he was thinking that the guy was probably doing something inside, probably shitting which Harry shouldn’t imagine. He should probably start looking for Louis, maybe he went outside and used the backdoor to exit.

He was just about to check it for himself but then he heard a groan, a pained groan to be exact and a weak cry.

“Please stop.”

Harry saw nothing but red, he was already pushing and forcing the door open. Louis was inside and someone was there with him and he’s going to kill that motherfucking bastard.

There was already a small crowd forming behind him but they refused to stop him, they would be an idiot to do so anyway.

“What the fuck dude, I said go away.” The man inside ordered angrily.

And that’s when Harry really heard him.

“Harry!” it was not as loud; it sounded muffled like there was something blocking his mouth to completely shout for help.

Harry mustered all of his strength in one push and he was able to successfully pull off the hinge of the door.

The first thing Harry saw was a huge guy, the typical guy who spends all his time in the gym, muscles bulging from his workout shirt and eyes glaring at Harry.

Next was the small figure behind the guy who was visibly shaking from the suspicious tight hold that he had on his face, it was Louis.

“What the fuck are you doing!” Harry shouted as he lunged himself towards the guy, his fist tightly aimed on the guys face.

There was a loud crack when it made contact with his jaw, Harry not minding the pain on his knuckles as he landed several punches until the guy’s hold on Louis’ face slacken as he tried avoiding Harry’s hits.

“Harry! Harry stop!” Paul shouted from behind but Harry did not really care because he was too busy rearranging this guy’s face.

It took probably four guys to successfully distance Harry from the now unconscious guy on the floor.

Harry was breathing hard and he was just about to go for another round when he remembered that he still had to check on Louis. He shrugged the tight hold of the others around him and went looking around for the blue eyed boy.

He let out a sigh of relief when he saw him sitting on the floor with Niall who was trying to calm him down.

He quickly made his way over him and Niall seemed to be relieved when he saw him too.

“He’s freaking out Harry, I can’t seem to calm him down.” Niall said worriedly.

Harry sat himself next to Louis and he immediately pulled the slightly shaking boy over his lap. Louis was still struggling weakly but Harry was quick to hug him tight, he placed his head over his shoulder as he rubbed his back softly.

“Hey, it’s me, it’s Harry. You’re safe now, it’s fine.” Harry whispered to him carefully, he didn’t want him to freak out further more.

It seems to work because Louis’ breathing started getting slower and the dampness on Harry’s neck seemed to be getting less.

He kept rubbing Louis’ back carefully as he watched the others remove the guys unconscious body off the restroom, he still had this urge to continue beating him up until he’s dead but he can’t just leave Louis like this.

“Don’t worry Harry, I’ll handle this. You boys should go home and rest.” Paul said when he was done instructing his assistant to close early.

“Was he a regular?” Harry asked because he never really recognized the face…well, especially now because of what Harry had done.

He never felt any kind of remorse or pity though; the guy has to see it coming. Harry did not even want to start thinking of what he could have done to Louis.

He tightened his hold on Louis because if he was a second too late to save him then this would have been much worse. Harry was sure that he’d probably end up killing the guy and he’ll be imprisoned for murder, he wouldn’t have regretted it though.

“No Harry, I only saw him today.” Paul answered with a grim expression.

Harry was just about to comment about permanently keeping the guy away from this gym when Louis weakly tugged on his shirt to get his attention.

“Harry.” He muttered quietly.

“Yes? What do you want Louis?” He asked worriedly.

“Can we go home now?”

“Of course, I’m taking you home.”

They both stood up, Louis’s gaze on the floor as he walked outside the gym with Harry, Liam, Niall and Zayn following closely.

They all decided to just walk Louis home since Louis refused to ride on a taxi; he said he needed some fresh air.

“Is Louis going to be ok?” Liam asked worriedly as he watched Louis who was in front of them, still staring at the ground.

“I’m going to make sure that he is.” Harry promised to them and also to himself.

Liam, Zayn and Niall were the first to leave because they still had a bus to catch so Harry and Louis were the only one left to walk home. Louis still refuses to talk and Harry knew he needed to give him some space. He couldn’t just crowd him and start asking him questions; he didn’t want to freak him out any further.

They were just a few blocks away from Louis’ house when Louis suddenly stopped walking which made Harry freeze from his steps.

Harry waited for something to happen, he was worried that Louis would suddenly burst into tears but something much more surprising happened that made Harry a thousand more confused.

Louis ran to him and jumped, Harry’s reflexes were fast enough to catch him before Louis’ combined weight and force should send them both falling on the ground.

Harry was just about to question him but then everything seemed to stop when he felt Louis’ lips on him. His reaction should be to pull away and ask what the hell was going on but Louis’ lips were addicting and he couldn’t really blame himself if he got lost on the feeling.

Louis was the first to pull away and he stared at Harry, a small smile slowly appearing on his lips.

“Thank you for saving me.”












Chapter Text





Louis’ mom was screaming while his dad was angrily pacing. Harry had to tell the Louis’ parents what had happened and they were in hysterics.

Louis’ dad had already contacted the police and angrily cursed that the bastard be stuck in jail for good.

Harry actually felt pity to the poor police on the receiving end because Mr. Tomlinson wasn’t even trying to filter all his colorful words and Harry had a hard time remembering if some of it were even legal.

At least it wasn’t Mrs. Tomlinson who decided to speak, Harry was sure the poor lad would end up with a bleeding ear or deaf.

Harry’s view of Louis’ parents changed after seeing how furious they were, it seems they actually care for Louis’ welfare and would do anything to keep him safe. They weren’t just those types of parent who didn’t care about their children and just obsessed about money or pressuring them to be successful.

And they haven’t kicked Harry out of their house which was a plus; Mrs. Tomlinson even offered him some tea which he declined politely because he was still reeling from that kiss.

Louis seems ok, a little shaken up but he promised that he’ll be fine. He just wanted to sleep and maybe miss school for a couple of days which was fine to his parents; they already called the school to notify them of the recent events.

Harry had to listen to Mrs. Tomlinson describe 50 ways to chop off that guys dick rather graphically and he had to wince a couple of times imagining it happening to his own.

Harry had faced and met numerous people who kill for a living but he was actually more scared of Louis’ mum. Now he knows who to not piss off ever.

“I’m deeply sorry for this Harry, I’m just really angry.” She apologizes after breathing hard to try and calm herself down.

“It’s fine, I’ve heard worse things before.”

Harry was obviously lying; he didn’t want to offend her or anything. He still hasn’t got over how Louis’ mother knew about middle age torture devices like it was a normal thing.

“Oh right, I haven’t apologize on the times I misjudged you. I am deeply sorry, it seems very unfair of me to judge you basely on your lifestyle and I clearly see that you care for my son deeply and I’m grateful for that.”

“Uh.., it’s no problem.” Harry stammered as he tried so hard not to blush.

It was obvious that he wasn’t used to this and Mrs. Tomlinson not slamming doors on his face is quite refreshing actually, he didn’t exactly know how to react on that.

Before anything could get more awkward than it already is, Louis’ dad barged into the kitchen with an angry frown etched all over his face.

“The police system still reeks, they asked us to go there and file a proper case or the guy would be released with just community service on his back, that son of a-.”

Before he can continue with his angry ranting, for like the hundred time around, Mrs. Tomlinson was quick to cut him off with a displeased shake of her head.

“Ok dear, that’s enough cursing for today dear, let me just get my things and we’ll go. No way is he leaving those bars after what he did.” She muttered angrily before leaving the kitchen to probably get her purse or something but she didn't take that long for Harry and the head of the Tomlinson to have a proper conversation.

Mrs. Tomlinson had brought a jacket for his husband while she proceeds to wrap a scarf around her neck.

“Should we wake Louis?” Mr Tomlinson asked after buttoning up his jacket.

Harry was just waiting for them to kick him out but he plans on sneaking inside after they left to make sure Louis wasn't left alone on his own. He didn't even think about the risk of being caught especially now that they seem to be fine with Harry being in their house.

He was a bit caught of guard though when Mrs. Tomlinson turned her attention back to him.

“Actually, I think Louis should rest, Harry here can look after him while we’re gone. Would that be ok with you Harry?” she asked sincerely that Harry had this huge urge to slap himself in the face to make himself believe that this wasn't some kind of dream.

He snapped himself out of his weird trance because he remembered he needed to answer, he didn't want to make her wait in fear of her ever changing her mind, who knows, girls are complicated remember?

“Of course, I'd look after your home while you're gone.” He beamed at her.

He must look rather pathetic right now, beaming like a seven year old kid to the woman who once hated his guts. It's so damn ironic.

Mrs. Tomlinson seemed to be thinking the same thing because she was smiling at Harry rather fondly, which again, is terribly odd.

Maybe it's some form of gratitude for saving their son's life but Harry's not about to question it. He fucking likes it.

“That’s what I want to hear, we’ll just be gone for a while.” She continued.

“Yes, you’re right. I’ll also try to get a good punch on the guy.” Mr. Tomlinson whispered, probably to only let Harry hear his plan as he let out a wink but his wife still heard him.

She glared at him, wagging an unimpressed finger over his face.

“No need to get too violent ok, we don’t want you getting in trouble.”

Harry wanted to laugh because just a while ago, Mrs. Tomlinson was speaking rather rated SPG stuffs that seems inappropriate for any kid under 18 to hear. But there's something about her that Harry can relate because he'd probably feel the same if Louis' safety was at stake.

“Fine…But no promises.” Mr Tomlinson sighed but laughed nonetheless because he knew his wife so well, she'll be kicking and punching the guy once she sees him.

“Let’s just get this over with.” She sighed almost exasperatedly to his husband before ushering him to the front door.

She glanced back at Harry to gesture to the fridge.

“Bye Harry, there’s some leftover in the fridge if you ever feel hungry.” She added.

“Feel at home.”  Mr. Tomlinson just gave him a quick nod which he returned. He decided to stay in the kitchen but can vaguely hear the two talking as they leave the house.

The sound of the door clicking shut and the voices arguing disappearing meant they were gone leaving Harry alone downstairs while Louis was upstairs resting.

“That was…. odd.” He mumbled to himself after recalling the weird interaction between him and Louis' parents.

He was too busy imagining about the positive effect of them liking him, he can come over anytime he want as long as he's in his best behavior and he was feeling like a total dork inside because goddammit, Louis' parents like him, the cold, judgmental and rude parents that he once thought of the boys he in love with is not what he expects.

But the real question here is would they change if they suddenly found out that he sees Louis more than a friend or that he sometimes thinks of kidnapping their son to keep for himself.

They would probably kill him.

“Harry?” a soft voice called from behind him.

He quickly spun around and was surprised to see Louis, who has now changed into his pj’s. He must have woken up to change because he remembered tucking him to bed wearing the same clothes he worn earlier.

Harry mentally cursed himself because Louis looks so damn soft and cute on his pajamas, Louis is a grown teenager and Harry did know because Louis told him that he’s more comfortable sleeping in clothes which are made of soft materials and Harry may or may not have imagined Louis wearing panties and he may or may not have gotten an embarrassing boner after.

What? He’s also a teenager, it’s perfectly normal.

He shakes his head to remove the thought of dragging Louis to the living room and snogging the life out of him because he looks so irresistible.

“Lou! You’re awake, are you hungry? Do you want anything to eat? I can heat up the leftover or I can cook if you want.” He asked as he approached him.

Louis was staring at him just as surprised.

“No, I’m fine; I just went down to get a drink.” He mumbled as he looked around, searching for something.

“Wait; let me do it for you.” Harry said as he scooped Louis’ into his arms.

Louis squeaked but didn’t object as he wrapped his arms around Harry’s shoulder. Harry gently sat him on the counter next to the fridge.

“You’re so weird.” Louis giggles as Harry ticked his bare foot.

“Shut up.” Harry rolled his eyes fondly before kissing Louis’ forehead and walking over to the fridge to get him some water.

He almost dropped the glass he was holding when Louis suddenly spoke out loud which surprised him.

“Hold on a sec, where’s my mom and dad?” He asked and when he figured out what he almost caused, he gave Harry an apologetic smile.

Harry just shrugged it off and gave Louis the water he wanted.

As much as he wanted to stand between Louis’ legs and be tempted to kiss him, he just went over to the sink to wash the dishes. Yes, Harry Styles known to knockout anyone with a punch is going to wash some dishes because he’s too noble and didn’t want to snog Louis on their kitchen counter. That would be inappropriate right?

“They left to go to the police station to file a proper case on that bastard.” He answered him as he starts to pour some dish washing liquid on the sponge.


It was quiet for a moment so Harry decided to hum a song that he heard on the radio. He would glance at Louis once in a while to see if he was ok, he seems fine as he drank all of his water and swung his foot adorable that Harry was restraining himself from picking him up and doing things to him.

Calm down Styles.

When Louis didn’t speak for a moment, Harry decided to question him. Louis wasn’t usually quiet; he was worried if what happened earlier still affected him.

“Are you ok? Is there something wrong?”

Louis shook his head and turned to him with a fond smile.

“No, no, I’m fine. I’m just surprised that’s all.”

“Surprise about what?” Harry questions as he placed all the washed dishes back to their place.

Harry is very specific with a clean kitchen, he might be tough but he likes his kitchen clean and spotless.

“That you’re here.” Louis added.

Harry wasn’t able to control the laugh that came out from him.

“Trust me, I am too. Your mom asked me to look after you while they’re gone.” He said, still laughing.

“Wow! Really?” Louis sounded more surprised.

Harry can relate to that.

“Yep.” Harry grinned proudly.

Suddenly his waist was being engulfed by slim arms as Louis hugged him from behind, it was a good thing that he had already finish with the dishes because he would have dropped everything in surprise. That would be hard to explain to Louis’ parents.

“My parents likes you!” Louis squealed in joy, hugging Harry tighter.

As much as Harry loves this, he would much rather hug Louis too so he pulls Louis’ arms and turns around so he was face to face with him.

Well, there’s a bit of a height difference so  Harry had to look down much to Louis’ distaste. Harry rolled his eyes and just pulled Louis closer to him.

“It took quite some time though.” He mumbled as he presses his face to his neck.

 “Better late than never right?” Louis muttered as he hugged Harry back.

“Yeah, better late than never.” Harry smiled and pulled back a bit to kiss Louis on the lips.

Closing his eyes as he enjoyed being this close to Louis, he didn’t have to hold back anymore.

And to this day, Harry promised to never ever let Louis out of his sight. The boy seriously needs Harry, he didn't have a problem with that though.








Chapter Text




Louis knew that he wasn’t really the strong and tough kind of lad. He was very aware of how his body seemed more feminine and curvy than any other normal boys his age. It was not his fault that he born that way, his height also didn’t help his case. It wasn’t hard for the bigger boys to find the difference in Louis which made him their main target of bullying.

Maybe if Harry didn’t appear out of nowhere then Louis Tomlinson would still be the kid that everyone picks up on.

He didn’t quite like to imagine that.

So he’s aware that he owes Harry a whole lot, but he’s getting rather sick of Harry who seems to be more protective than ever.

Don’t get him wrong, he’s grateful because he knows that Harry cares for his safety a lot and at the beginning he could still understand his point of wanting him to always be in his sight and his reason was Blake was still roaming the school freely and he could hurt Louis.

And Zayn had told him that Harry was not yet over the gym incident which Louis would like to erase fully from his memory but he’s over it. They guy just caught him off guard and he was more embarrassed of what the boys think of him rather than what that guy has almost done to him.

He was almost a grown up boy and he still couldn’t protect himself and that’s not ok for him because he can’t always rely on others for safety.

So he’s got a mission.

He knows Harry wouldn’t like or even remotely approve of it but if there’s anything he got from his parents is that he’s pretty damn stubborn.






“What do you mean I should teach you how to fight?!” Harry exclaimed unbelievingly.

It was like in the movies where someone tells something ground breaking to another while they were in the process of drinking, in surprise, chokes and spits almost everything in surprise.

Harry didn’t die from choking, which Louis was grateful but he was staring at Louis like he was crazy; like he’d grown another head and if it was any different reason then he’d be laughing at him.

But he should keep his determined face on if he wants Harry to take him seriously.

Louis decided to tell Harry about his mission during lunch when they were in the middle of eating.  He wanted Harry to teach him how to fight so he can defend himself in times of danger.

Zayn, Liam and Niall were silently laughing to themselves and decided not to interfere with the two.

Harry was hard headed and Louis who was stubborn arguing is worth watching, it doesn’t happen every day but once it does, it’s quite a show. And they knew Harry would agree later on because he’s that whipped but it doesn’t mean he’s going to just stand down without a fight.

“That’s exactly what I mean; I want you to teach me some combat moves of yours.”

Harry actually winced like the thought physically pains him; the thought of Louis being on the receiving end of Harry’s punches….nope, just nope.

“Absolutely not.” Harry stated as he tried glaring at Louis to prove his point that he would never ever show Louis the side of fighting and violence. Louis should just stay safe with his studies and his books and Harry will do all the tough things, just the image of Louis with a bruise can seriously harm Harry’s mental state.

Louis just glared at him harder, his eyebrows almost meeting as he tried to sway Harry and change his decision. He knows that it won’t be an easy task but no way is he backing down from it.

They were glaring down at each other, the distant from their faces were just inches away and Harry had to hold himself back and prevent him from grabbing Louis’ stubborn face and kissing him. That wasn’t fair because Louis looked ridiculous with his glasses and trying to look tough and Harry’s heart is confused.

“It was Louis who sighed sadly as he pulled away and Harry had a mini victory dance in his head because he can’t believe that he was able to resist and not agree on Louis for the first time. It was an achievement, he’s going to fucking celebrate all he want.

“Ok fine, you don’t want to teach me. That’s ok.” Louis said as he turns his attention towards his other friends.

Zayn, Liam and Niall were all watching with such interest in their eyes that most mothers who were watching their favorite show on TV have. They were sitting on the edge of their seats, waiting for what could happen next.

Louis rolled his eyes and turns back to Harry who already had a victorious smirk all over his face.

He couldn’t help but smirk himself because Harry knew better than to think that he’s going to just give up without having a backup plan.

That made Harry’s smirk fall.

Seeing Louis with a devilish smirk was hot but that wasn’t his point, the point was that smirk meant more and Harry is so screwed.

Niall burst out laughing, probably thinking the same thing followed by Liam and Zayn.

Harry would really really like to punch them all.

“I was just thinking that it’ll be better if you were the one to teach me so you can still look out for me but you don’t want to so it’s fine, I’ll find someone who would do it then.” Louis grinned mischievously and stood up from his seat.

Harry had his mouth open in shock as Louis sauntered away, probably returning back to his class.

Of course Louis knew how to instantly make Harry give in. He was a fucking smartass and Harry wanted to kiss the disobedience out of him. God damn Louis for being so god damn smart all the time.

“Points for Louis, Zero for Harry.” Zayn laughed as he wiped the actual tears on his eyes from laughing so hard.

“Oh my god hahahaha, the look on Harry’s face.” Niall followed, chuckling helplessly. He was so close to just rolling on the floor and laughing at the disbelieving look on his friends face.

Liam was also laughing but he decided not to comment because they were already being stared at by half the people on the cafeteria, probably wondering what all the ruckus was.

Harry still wanted to punch them to shut them the hell up.

“Shut up you idiots, didn’t you just hear what Louis said?!” He muttered angrily to his so called friends.

“Harry, Louis just wanted you to teach him how to defend himself.” Liam reasoned out because Niall and Zayn were still laughing and recalling the recent events between Harry and Louis.

It’s decided.

Liam is his only friend; he ignored the two and glared daggers at them before turning back to Liam, his one true friend.

“But why would Louis even want that, I would never let anything happen to him.”

“Harry, listen to what you’re saying. Louis cares for you a lot but you’re treating him like a child and maybe he doesn’t want that, maybe he wants to know how he can defend himself without any of our help.” Zayn butted in.

Harry scowled at him but he can’t deny his point because he was probably right, Zayn was always fucking right anyway. Louis had eventually grown tired of Harry guarding and following him around like some personal body guard. Even the other kids at their school had noticed and more people had started avoiding him, they were all scared of Harry which you know, figures.

“You were bruising his manly ego Harry, he’ll react soon or might I say now.” Niall added.

“What am I supposed to do then guys?” Harry sighed dejectedly.

“It’s either you teach him or like he said, he’ll find someone who’ll teach him.”

No way in hell would he let other people near Louis and teach him how to land a punch or two, what if they fuck up and Louis got hurt in the process.

He wouldn’t be able to forgive that person and Harry wouldn’t be able to forgive himself because if he wasn’t so hard headed and just agree then Louis wouldn’t be in much danger.

“Fucking hell.” Harry angrily muttered to himself as Liam, Zayn and Niall all patted his back.

They knew Harry would give in to Louis anyway.






Louis should have thought long and Hard about his plan of not yet speaking to Harry until he agrees because he’s been used to always seeing him and being able to talk to him and now he’s trying to ignore him. Emphasis on the word trying because Harry looks like a kicked puppy when he arrived at their English class and Louis had decided to switch seats and not next to their usual seat.

Louis wanted to kick himself for causing that but Harry really should just say yes so they can go back to normal.

He couldn’t focus on what his teacher was saying because he was busy stopping himself from turning around and subtly looking at what Harry was doing.

Class flew by so fast and Louis was scowling at himself because for the first time in his life, a class was ending without him even understanding a damn thing.

He didn’t even notice Harry hurrying out of the room because he was too distracted about his empty notes in class.

He only found out about Harry’s disappearance when he unconsciously turn to his side to tell him about his failure and forgot that he wasn’t sitting next to Harry.

“Harry I-“ he paused and tried looking for him around the room but he was gone.

He hurriedly placed all his stuff in his bag and exited the room and tries to find his curly headed friend.

Another reason why Louis had wanted Harry to help him is because he sucks so much at cardio. His legs were already killing him after running for like a few meters. Even running away from danger isn’t even an option.

He stopped running for a minute to even his breathing out because damn it feels like running a marathon.

Louis was too busy catching his breath that he didn’t notice a group of people coming his way. A pair of new polished shoes stepped in front of him making the hair at the back of his neck rise because even without looking at the owner of those shoes, he knew too well who can afford such expensive looking shoes.

“Well, well, well, isn’t it my favorite nerd Louis Tomlinson.”

Louis clenched his fist and slowly lifted his head to come face to face with Blake.

“Nice to see you as well, I think...” Louis muttered under his breath.

Blake burst out laughing and Louis noticed that he wasn’t alone. There were two other guys behind him and Louis hasn’t seen them before.

“You speak! The nerd speaks!”

Louis gritted his teeth because he has no time to deal with this.

“I’ll be going now thanks.”

He went to take a step aside but the guy behind Blake blocked his way and when he tried to go the other way, the other guy did as well and now Louis was getting nervous.

He knew where this was going and he wasn’t particularly looking forward to it. This is exactly the same reason why Harry should just help him, so he can at least get himself out of this when none of his friends were there to help him.

“Don’t leave now, I haven’t seen you without that bodyguard of yours following you around. Is he your boyfriend?”

Louis didn’t speak, just tried looking around for a way to escape this inconvenient events.

“I can’t believe that you’re both a nerd and a fag.” Blake laughed and Louis suddenly snapped.

“Shut up you fucking asshole.” He angrily glared at Blake because seriously, Louis really wants to punch him but he was afraid he’ll hurt himself more than he’ll hurt Blake.

Blake seems surprise of his outburst though.

“Oh, so you grew yourself some balls and now you’re fighting back.” He was then smirking at Louis.

Louis rolls his eyes because he was so tired of how big headed this guy was.

“I’m not as immature as you Blake, why don’t you grow yourself some balls and grow up.” He retorted, he was suddenly very proud of himself but the enjoyment was gone quickly when Blake was clenching his fist and readying himself to punch.

“You’re going to pay for saying that.” He said.

Louis was lucky to have dodged, Blake ended up hitting a wall which must have hurt. The distraction was enough for Louis to escape and make a quick run for it.

“Get him boys!” Blake shouted from behind.

Like what Louis said before, he wasn’t the fastest runner and he knew that they’ll be able to catch up on him quickly and he’s going to be dead.

He can’t die! Harry was still upset with him.

“Come back here you little fag.”

Louis didn’t know how much he can run, he still hasn’t recovered from his early sprint so he needed to think of some plan before Blake catches up and beat him.

He needed an exit and it feels like all his prayers were answered when he saw the slightly opened Chemistry lab which he immediately entered, locking it completely before Blake and his friends can even enter.

“You think you can lock yourself forever in there Louis? You’re not as smart as everyone thinks you are then.” Blake shouted from the other side of the door.

“Think Louis, think.” He whispered to himself.

He was biting his nails and trying to come up of a solution quickly because it seems the damn old doorknob wouldn’t hold back from Blake and his friend’s brute force on trying to push it open.

He needed to distract Blake and the others so he could make a run to safety and hopefully find his friends.

“Smoke bombs.” Louis suddenly realized when his eyes caught a glass labeled with potassium nitrate.

Smoke bombs are easy to make with the right kind of ingredients and it seems the luck was in Louis’ side because there are actual ingredients stocked up next to the glass.

It seems the last class to use the lab where actually trying to create one.

Louis quickly went to work, his hands shaking a bit because he was pressured dammit, who knows how long before Blake completely breaks the door.

He finished mixing everything in a bowl and was in the process of pouring it in a rolled out cardboard and cleaning the leftovers because he’ll be in trouble if he leaves a mess.

He used a piece of paper as the fuse part so it’ll be easy to light it up and quickly snatching a box of matches. He placed his little experiment under a table, just a few feet away from the door and decided to light it up in a minute when he’s sure that they’re inside.

Louis was sweating while he watched the poor door broken down and he quickly lit the paper and ran at the back to hide.

“You’re so dead Tomlinson.” Blake angrily muttered.

But before he can even walk any close to Louis, the smoke bomb ignites in front of them which caught them of guard.

“Oh shit.” The cursed as they panicked, not knowing why there was so much smoke.

“Fire! There’s a fire!” one of Blake’s friend shouted as he ran outside for safety.

“Go back, go back, run!” Blake yelled as he pushed his other friend and disappeared.

The other guy followed quickly just before the smoke bomb was finished and Louis sighed in relief because that was so damn close.

He quickly exited the lab just as the school fire alarm blared through the hallways.

He needed to escape quickly before any authorities come and check what was going on.

Students were rushing out of their class as teachers shouted for everyone to exit the premises. Louis tried to blend in and followed so it may seem that he didn’t actually caused the panic in his school.

The adrenaline was still rushing in him because he can’t believe he actually managed to escape. He wasn’t dead.

“Louis!” someone called from farther ahead.

He stood on his toes so he could see from the swarm of students who it was and he was so damn happy when his blue eyes met green.




Chapter Text

Harry never felt more afraid in his whole life before except now. When he stared at the other students running around screaming about a fire and the fire alarm blaring through the hallways. He wasn't scared of the fire, he could easily run or jump out of a window. The thing that scares him is the Louis Tomlinson missing from his side and the Louis that he left in classroom because he was immature and they were in a middle of an argument.

Louis was still inside the school, his Louis might get trapped in the fire. Harry felt like having a heart attack but he can't die now, he has to save Louis and probably die later.

"Louis!!" He started shouting.

Students were running to and pushing each other to get outside of school, Harry suddenly wondered where the lesson they had on earthquake drills went because they were just panicking and screaming.

Not quite good for situations like this.

Harry suddenly saw a girl who was pushed to the floor and was crying while holding her foot. Other students were almost stepping on her so Harry quickly went to help her. He saw a giant bruise on the girls leg, which might be the reason why she was on the floor.

Harry was on a mission to find Louis but he can't just leave the poor girl.

"Hey, let me help you out." He quickly carried her bridal style and ran outside to ask for help.

"Thank you so much." the girl was sobbing on Harry's shoulder.

When they got out, Harry saw the school nurse so he quickly asked for help. Some students also helped the girl and he made sure he was okay before running back and starting his search for Louis.

It happened several more times, Harry didn't know what kind of luck he has but he kept helping injured students get outside, his gut was saying to leave them but a voice strangely resembling Louis was telling him to help out.

When he helped the last one out, that's when Harry saw him, running out of the hallway with other students.

"Harry!" Louis shouted as he saw Harry.

Harry never felt so happy seeing Louis, unscathed and unhurt.

He quickly ran to him and hugged him, his heart beating a mile a minute and his eyes closing in relief because God, Louis was safe. Harry couldn't stop thanking whoever was listening to him.

After a few minutes, fire fighters came and inspected what really happened, they didn't stay long enough to know what the cause of the fire because Louis' parents came and fetch him as well as other parents.

Harry also headed home, heart still recovering from the intense fear he had earlier, he needed a good long hours worth of sleep.



The following week...

Students were gathered around the school gym, the principal had cancelled all classes and asked everyone to attend. He said he has something important to say.

Almost everyone knew that this has something to do with the false fire incident and Louis was sweating buckets. After the initial investigation, they found out that there was no actual fire but students reported seeing huge amount of smokes which triggered the fire alarms.

It was the talk of the town and school was cancelled for three days because of the incident.

Louis knew too well who was to blame.

Next to him stands Harry who was eying him suspiciously but with worry and Zayn who had a bored sleepy look on his face. Liam and Niall were in front of him, talking about something that Louis didn’t quite understand clearly because he was too busy fidgeting with his nails and avoiding any eye contact with anybody.

"Thank you all for coming in today, first I would like to thank everyone who showed kindness and helped others while we were in a terrible state." the principal started.

Everyone clapped and they were all looking at Harry, the news broke along with the fake fire on how the bad boy that everyone was scared of had helped a lot of student who were trampled during the commotion. Some even went as far as calling him a hero and Louis never felt more proud.

But that wasn't the issue right now, no, it was something else.

“Someone is responsible for last weeks incident.” The principal started with a serious look on his face.

The chattering of the student continues and Louis heard some girls talking behind him loudly.

“I heard that some students set up smoke bombs at the chemistry lab.” One girl says.

Louis unconsciously gulped because he didn’t really mean for that to happen. Honestly, it was created as a diversion for those mean kids to stop beating him up but it turns out his magnificent escape had caused quite a problem to his school.

“Really? That’s horrible.” Another girl gasped.

“Yeah, it was chaos, Mary almost broke her foot because some students panicked that she instantly fell to the floor.” The other replied.

Louis wanted the ground to open up and swallow him whole.

“Man, whoever did that will surely be in trouble.”

How many are his odds that he’s able to hold in the vomit that he wanted to puke all over the gym floor. It feels like he’s turning green and a little bit nauseous. Years of trying to do the right and good thing did not ready him from facing any trouble or conflict especially in school.

“I don’t want to go to the extreme but I am left with no choice but to cancel our formal unless anyone will tell me who did it or better yet admit it.” The principal continues after shushing the crowd.

There were collective gasp from the students and the whole gym exploded into complaints and outcry of the principal being unfair to everyone.

 Louis would have rolled his eyes because seriously, they’re over reacting quite bit.

But he knew the preparation that was spent to make the upcoming formal; he can even see Liam and Niall looking terrified. They were both on the committee and have worked their ass off and Louis could understand how cancelling it would be a waste of time and effort for them.

He should do something right?

Surely with his good performance and record in school, their principal wouldn’t do anything harsh like put this in his transcript and would probably ruin his chance for any future college scholarship.

“Hey Louis, are you ok? You look a little bit sick. Should I take you to the nurse?” Harry worriedly asked as he stood in front of Louis, placing his hand all over his face to try and check if he’s a bit under the weather.

Louis’ guilt cannot handle Harry’s constant mothering him especially while it’s eating him up to not confess what he did.

If he did it now, the angry mob of students might kill him with their piercing looks and deathly stares.

This will be it then, this will be the end of Louis’ Tomlinson life or maybe his career which hasn’t even started yet.

“I will be giving until this afternoon to whomever it is that is guilty. You can all go back to your class, good day to you all again.” The principal finishes as he left the podium and the gym followed by the other teachers.

The whole gym exploded into chatters and Louis could vaguely hear some popular kids threatening to break the leg whoever it is that is responsible. They were all girls though so Louis is losing his mind of how this formal and this accident will cause him a leg, his school is a bit fucked up if you asked him.

Everyone started leaving and Louis was still stuck on where he was standing, he could here other students making weird guesses on who was to blame for the incident.

No one suspected it was him though, and surprisingly, no one suspected Harry either. Some students have talked to him and thanked him and it was obvious in Harry's face how awkward he is.

Louis was happy because if Harry was suspected, he would get kicked out and he didn't want that to happen.

Louis was pulled out of his own thoughts when a hand appeared in front of his face.

"Hey Louis, are you sure you're ok?" 

It was Harry, Louis didn't even notice him moving from his side.

"I'm fine Harry." he lied.

They also walked out of the school gym and went on their way to their next class. Next to them where Zayn, Liam and Niall. Zayn was trying to cheer Liam up because Liam was too bummed that spring formal might get cancelled when he worked his ass off to prepare.

Louis felt ten times guilty seeing his friends sorrowfull look.

"Oh come on Liam, don't be depressed, it's just a stupid dance." Harry said.

Louis almost hit him on the back of his head but Zayn beat him to it.

"Shut up idiot." he muttered angrily.

"Aw! That hurt asshole." Harry groaned while rubbing his head.

Liam smiled and bit and let out a deep sigh.

"I'm sorry guys, I know I should be glad because we're all safe but I can't help but wonder who caused all of this, I would like to kick them in the face." Liam sighed.

Louis felt like fainting.


The other three went on their way to their next class leaving Louis and Harry to go a seperate class.

Harry knew something was wrong so when he saw a door leading to the janitors closet, he quickly pulled Louis inside and locking them both inside.

Louis looked startled as he stared at Harry dumbfounded.

"What are you doing Harry?" he questioned his friend.

Harry leaned to the door and glared at Louis. He was still recovering from the fright of his life but he needed some answers, something was wrong with Louis and he needed to get it out from him or he'll have to force it out of him if badly needed.

"You've been acting strange, I know.something is wrong so you're going to tell me right here right now." Harry demanded, eyeing Louis seriously.

Louis knew he had nowhere to go, he felt trapped but he knew Harry wouldn't do anything that would hurt him and he trust Harry with everyrhing in his might and if there's anyone he should tell about his problems, it should be him right.

He took a deep breath and readied himself. He stared straight at Harry's eyes and admitted everything. Everything that was weighing on his shoulder, the lies and the truth.

"I was responsible for last weeks incident."

Harry listened carefully, cursing when he heard that Louis almost got beaten up by Blake and blamed himself for leaving him alone in the first place. This was all his fault.

When Louis was done speaking, Harry knew that Louis couldn't admit or tell anyone what happened because he could get in serious trouble.

"I will tell the principal what happened." Louis suddenly spoke.

Harry stared at him, cursing Louis in his mind because of course he would admit his mistakes without a doubt.

"Louis, you can't. You might get suspended." Harry reasoned out.

Louis is anything if not determined.

"I couldn't let the formal be canceled because of me, Liam and Niall worked so hard." 

"It's just a stupid dance Louis." Harry angrily said.

Louis grew upset with Harry, he knew he wouldn't like it but he though he would understand.

"It's final Harry, I will tell them what happened and then I'll accept whatever punishment they give." Louis finally said before pushing Harry to te side and leaving him alone in the janitor's closet.

Harry knew that there was only one thing he could do to stop this from getting worse.


Louis managed to make it to his class and he sat through it, full of jitters and looking at the clock, waiting for the class to be over so that he could go to the principal's office and tell everything.

Harry decided to skip class but the teacher wasn't that mad about him doing it, maybe because of the heroic act that he did last week.

Louis knew Harry was upset with him but his guilt couldn't handle lying to everyone.

He should do the right thing.

When the bell rang signaling that class was over, Louis was quickly putting his things on his bag when the school intercom suddenly came alive and the voice of the principal could be heard speaking.

"Good afternoon students, I am glad to announce that the school formal is back on track and that the culprit from last week incident has come forward. Thank you for everyones cooperation and good day." 

The line went dead and everyone cheered, excited that the formal was back.

While Louis turned pale as a ghost because he couldn't believe what he heard, there was no way it could happen.

And then he remembered the only one he knew could have done such a thing.


Chapter Text




Louis felt the tears falling nonstop as he rushed to get to the principals office. He couldn't understand what in the world was Harry thinking. Why would he admit to a mistake that he wasn't even a part of. 

"Stupid, stupid." he kept murmuring under his breath.

When he reached the principals door, he found it locked so he politely knocked and waited for the inevitable.

He wasn't sure what the right punishment was but he could only guess, suspension for a few days is taking it lightly and the worse could be getting kicked out. Louis doesn't want to imagine what could happen to Harry, especially now that he's on the right track. 

Louis wouldn't forgive himself.

He felt his heart stop when the door suddenly opened, he stared at the principals questioning eyes before wandering his eyes inside his office.

But there was no Harry inside.

"Mr. Tomlinson, how may I help you?" 

Louis instantly felt a bit panicked when he couldn't find Harry inside.

"Um, is Harry here?" was the only thing he could ask even though it was obvious that he wasn't.

Mr. Cowells forehead creased at the mention of Harry's name, like the sound of it brings huge amount of pain in his head.

"So you are aware of what Mr. Styles did?" the principal sighed and opened his office door wider, signaling Louis to enter.

"Harry didn't do it Mr. Cowell!" Louis quickly defended Harry, he was ready to spill everything in order to save Harry.

"Mr. Tomlinson, I am aware of it." 

Now Louis was more confused.

"I am told that you were the reason for the smoke bomb and that you were the one who set it up." Mr. Cowell continues with a serious look.

Louis stared at him wide eyed and mouth hanging open, so Mr. Cowell was fully aware.

"A-am I in trouble Mr. Cowell?" Louis stuttered because this was it, should he start saying goodbye to his squeaky clean records.

"No you're not Louis."

Louis felt his heart at the bottom.of his stomach when he heard what his principal had said. He was not in trouble, but how?

He was the whole reason the school was facing problems and now that Mr. Cowell knew the truth, why wasn't he in trouble? 

"What?" he questioned.

He hopes Mr. Cowell wouldn't get tired answering all his questions, he could imagine how annoying he is right now.

"I am aware of what have happened and I completely understand that it was caused by some other students bullying you and as you are aware, we are against bullying in this institution. So the right judgement is to suspend Blake, Arnold and Dmitri for a week."

Louis couldn't believe it, Blake was the one who got in trouble. He was safe, he wasn't going to tarnish his grades, he still had a fighting chance on his scholarship grant.

But the real question was, if Blake was the one who got suspended, what does Harry have to do with everything.

"What does Harry have to do with this? Is he in trouble." He asked what was running on his mind, desperate for an answer and he badly needed to see his curly friend.

Mr. Cowell sighed once more and looked like he aged from when Louis saw him last which was this morning.

Louis actually felt bad on how much problem and stress he've brought to his principal, he was thinking of maybe sending him some fruit basket or something.

"Mr. Tomlinson, Mr. Styles had beaten up those three in order for them to admit what they did." Mr. Cowell sighed, his hands massaging the side of his temple.

Louis felt his heart drop once again.

"No." was the only word he could get out from his mouth.

"I am deeply dissapointed with Harry but I also understand that he was just looking after you but I am left with no choice but to expel Mr. Styles due to extreme use of force and violence to three student of this school." Mr. Cowell continued.

Louis felt some sick pleasure from the though of Harry beating up the person who was the reason of his years in misery but Harry got in trouble, Harry will be kicked out of school for trying to help Louis. Harry who had only one last shot to graduate.

"No Mr. Cowell, Harry didn't mean it." Louis begged, tears starting to gather on his eyes.

"I really can't do much Louis, Blakes parents have already reported this to the authority. Harry being a bit underage had helped him not get sent to jail but he's been warned before and I don't think I can do anything more." was the last thing Mr. Cowell said before he had to politely ask to Louis to leave because he needed to write a formal letter to Harry's parents and to the school's administration about Harry's expulsion.

Louis felt really bad, a whole lot of guilty and pathetic.

His records were saved but Harry's education was put into the line.

He couldn't stop crying.


 Louis immediately ran to find Zayn, or Liam, even Niall could be of help. Harry was not in school anymore and he didn't know where he went. He still doesn't have a phone where he could be contacted and he didn't remember the address of his house.

He could go to the gym but he couldn't make himself go, he still has nightmares at night from the incident that happened there that's why he has to find someone who could help.

"ZAYN!" He shouted as he saw his dark haired friend walking to his next class.

He found Zayn, thank god. He was slowly losing his mind.

Zayn's eyes widen once he saw his friends dishevelled look, eyes red and face dried with tears and sweat from all the running ang crying.

Andrenaline is an amazing thing.

"Harry's gone Zayn! It's all my fault!" He sobbed as he wiped his nose with his shirt.

It was disgusting but Louis couldn't care anymore. 

Zayn placed his hands over Louis shoulder, deep beyond concern. First would be a crying Louis and now a missing Harry.

"Okay, deep breath Lou. I'm going to call Liam and Niall while you explain everything to me." Zayn calmly said to him.

Oh right, phones. 

Louis was too busy trying to call Harry that he forgot he could call the others.

His head was a mess but good thing Zayn was here to help him. He explained rather poorly to Zayn everything but he was smart enough to understand everything. Louis was even skipping class which he would never do but for the first time, Harry felt more important.

Harry has always been more important.

Soon Liam and Niall met with them and they tried asking anyone if thet saw Harry, one student said he saw hin take a cab so they all took a cab and went straight to Paul's gym.

When they arrived, Louis almost tripped on his feet when he ran inside and he never felt so relieved when he saw him there. Harry.

Harry who has a black eye under his eye and another busted lip, Louis was still thankful because he's not somewhere like a hospital because damn, those are three average muscled teenagers and it's just Harry. Well it's Harry, i think that is supposed to be expected.

"Harry!" He shouted before running into him

"Woah." Harry was surprised and barely caught Louis when he flung himself to him. Louis was lightweight compare to the weights he was used to carrying at the gym so he didn't have that much of a problem carrying him, the surprise just threw him off.

"Lou! What the hell are you doing here?" You have class!" Harry suddenly realized when he saw the time on the clock hanginf from the wall.

He immediately put the feathered hair boy to the ground and couln't help but frown when he notice hia dishevelled look, he still looked fucking tasty though.

"You dumb idiot!" Louis suddenly shouted then he started hitting his fist in Harry's chest.

Harry is more concerned on Louis' rather than the pain he was receiving. Louis could literally break his hand by doing that.

Louis stopped and just hugged him, sniffling on his chest like a crybaby.

Harry finally saw his other friends who were staring at him and Louis with concern and solemn looks. 

"Hey guys." He greeted them with a wave.

Niall bursted also into tears and went to hug Harry. Liam following behind, his eyes glassy and Zayn just shook his head. He shouldn't let his emotions go right now, they all needed someone level headed.

Harry sighed as he was crushed in a tight hug, his body covered with tears, snot and sweat. He doesn't have any problem with that because he was surrounded by people who truly cared about him. 


He's been waiting for them all his life.


Chapter Text

Harry has a habit of doing things without even giving it a second thought. But what was to think about anyway? Louis was in trouble where in the first place he shouldn't be. He can't let those assholes sleep comfortably at night while the guilt in Louis' conscience is eating him up whole. So the only solution he came up with was that, beat them all until they confess what they did, probably not the smartest thing to do but it was a plan that Harry stuck with. He got expelled, so what? That's not something that will blow a big hole in Harry's barely visible future.

That's not the case for Louis though.

"I can't believe you right now." Louis grumbled, annoyed as he dabbed antiseptic at Harry's wound, he had a middle finger side cut on his back which isn't that deep but would leave a mark. It's just one of the wounds and bruises that Louis found on his body.

They decided to go to Harry's apartment, the other boys decided to head back to school but promised to return once it's over. They decided to make up an excuse for Louis about catching diarhea or something so that he wouldn't have to go back. Louis was the one who refused to the astonishment of the others. He just couldn't leave Harry on his own to tend to his wounds.

"Ouch, easy Lou!" Harry whined when Louis purposely pressed the cotton swab on Harry. He was just really upset with Harry.

"How can you still punch things when your body is black and blue, you look terrible!" He snapped.

Harry was really amaze at how differently this Louis was, it was kinda turning him on. Louis all feisty and mad, he didn't get that usually.

"I still look handsome though right?" He joked but was answered by a glare. 

'Fuck.' Harry inwardly moaned. He wanted to just grab Louis and throw him to his bed. 

"Shut up!" Louis snapped again which got Harry out of his rather or probably very dirty thought.

"Aw Lou, you're being incredibly mean today." He tried to make Louis more mad, more feisty and sassy, which is probably not a good idea but he was really really getting turned on by it.

"Seriously Harry, shut up or I'll dose you with rubbing alcohol."

Harry snapped his mouth shut, he didn't want to anger Louis  much further than he already is. Louis just continued cleaning Harry's wounds and muttering lowly that Harry couldn't understand.

"What do you think should I have done Lou?" Harry asked slowly as to understand why Louis is this angry, shouldn't he be happy that Harry saved him from possibly ruining his grades that he worked so hard to achieve?

Louis stared at him in the eye, the glare was replaced by a small frown.

"If your excuse is that you did it for my grades I will literally ask Paul to teach me how to fight so that I can kick your ass." He said softly, with no real hint of anger despite the threat.

Harry was sprechless for a minute but when he was capable of speaking again, all he was able to mutter was a pathetic...


Louis took a deep breath and placed the first aid kit on the side, he then stood up and planted himself at Harry's lap. Harry was surprise at the gesture but immediately made sure he was comfortable. 

Louis traced a bruise in Harry's shoulder and kept quiet for a bit. Harry lets him have his time and he was enjoying Louis touching his body anyway so no rush really.

After a few more minutes of just being quiet, Louis looks up at Harry and sighed.

"You're more important than my grades Harry, grades and awards don't define a person. I would accept the suspension if it means that you can graduate and have a better future." He mumbled but Harry was just inches away from him so he heard it all too clearly.

His heart suddenly began pounding like crazy and he knew he must be smiling so wide because his face hurts, it has a certain ache in it but he loves it. He can't believe that was his Louis who said that, when just a few months before he thought he was some kind of modified android who is not capable of feelings.

"Lou..." He breathed out, maybe a bit breathless but who cares. He was just in awe of this guy.

Louis continued speaking and his face was all red from blushing and Harry was stopping himself from cooing at him.

"I want us to graduate together, go to uni and start reaching our dreams. You and me, just the two of us." He finishes as he stared at Harry all wide eyes and all sorts of adorable.

But that was the thing, Harry knew Louis could be anything, there is no stopping him but Harry...well.

"You know no university would accept me, and if they did how do you think will I be able to afford it?" Harry sighed as hugged Louis close to him.

Harry has thought about it too, maybe dreamed it a little bit but it was just so impossible to be at the level of Louis especially now that he lost all hope of graduating. He's already two years ahead of everyone and no school would accept him anymore given it was almost the end of the semester.

"You know anything could be possible Harry." Louis said sadly over where he was nuzzled on his neck.

Harry closed his eyes and left a kiss on Louis forehead. No matter how angry Louis would be, he would never regret what he did. It was for him anyway.

Harry pulled away from their hug and smiled at Louis.

"You have a bright future Louis, I don't. I want you to soar high and be anything you wanted to be." He grinned.

"But what about you?" Louis asked while pouting sadly.

Harry did what his mind told him, he literally cooed at Louis but he just glared at him which made him chuckle.

"What about me? I'm already a lost cost, when you found me on that library, something changed and I'm glad I became a better person, well slightly better and I get to know you and the others. That's the fucking greatest thing in my shit cake of a life and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world." He said with a proud smile directed at Louis.

Harry's not even saying that for Louis to feel good, it was just the honest truth. His life is kind of shitty.

Louis immediately hugged him tight, burrowing his face at Harry's chest.

"Meeting you was the greatest thing that happened to me too." Louis' confession was a bit jumbled because he was talking against Harry's skin but repeated himself after.

"You know that I Love You Louis right?" Harry knew that saying that was a bit too early on, not really the most romantic time to declare his love but he just felt like it was the best time.

Ofcourse Louis seemed shock, Harry could understand. He's not even hurt, love isn't something you throw away that easily without being 100% sure it's real. Harry's been pinning way to long, he's very sure that it's legit.

"Harry.." Louis slowly says but Harry cut him off before he blabbers any excuse.

"You don't have to say it back, it's fine." Harry assures him with a peck on the chick.

Look at what he's become, scary Harry Styles who the world things is a big bad meenie giving away pecks on on the cheek.

But it's Louis, it's all for Louis.

"Shut up. I'm getting the feeling that loving you isn't going to be that easy." Louis said, playfully punching Harry chest.

Louis then though tugging at Harry's nipple was thr brightest thing to do but boy was he wrong.

He was oblivious on the effect he has on Harry at how Harry closed his eyea for a moment and breathed hard as the sensation of Louis' fingers brought a certain kind of electricity on his body.

Harry was urging his erection away so he reajusted Louis position on his lap and tried not to let him sit on his dick which he might feel is semi hard.

"Ouch, you think loving an oblivious idiot is easy? I've been sending you signals since junior year and you still don't have any clue." He joked, voice deep so he faked a cough to make it unnoticeable to Louis.

"Heey it wasn't my fault that I thought you just hanged out with me for pity." Louis answered like it was a fact that the whole world knows.

If only Louis knows what half the school thinks, he probably wouldn't be saying that.  He's just really oblivious and is Harry supposed to be blame for that?

Harry is also not to be blamed if Louis suddenly felt a hard poking on his ass because he just continued playing with Harry's nipples like it's the next big interesting things to put your hands on it. He was already getting horny from his close proximity, he doesn't need this torture.

To get his focus away from his dick and back to his already clouded mind, he vaguely remembers Louis mentioning about pity.

That made Harry frown at him.

"Pity? I fucking want to grab you and slam you at every corner and snog the intelligence out of you until you're a blubbering mess." He said and realized the words that came from his mouth. Oh.

Probably not the smartest. Sue him, his mind doesn't have any control or filter, to busy calming his dick down.

"Harry!" Louis literally squeaked, like a girlish scream and his expression looking all scandalized.

Harry didn't understand why Louis was surprise.

"What? I'm at my young stages of life, I'd like to make you mine as much as possible but no, I had to be with the company of my hand all night."

Okay, that part was a lie. Not completely but also not completely the truth. When Harry was all lonely and brocken and a whole lot of pinning, he tried to fuck anyone who closely resembles Louis. But that was long time ago, he stopped because he knew he couldn't find anyone close enough to Louis. He was just unique and so perfect, Harry would have literally created a fanbase dedicated to Louis.

Harry was too busy daydreaming that he didn't notice Louis being quiet. He suddenly grew worried at having offended him in his confessions.

"Hey, are you okay?" He asked lowly, sounding every bit of apologetic.

Louis was all red in the face and avoided Harry's eyes at all cost.

"I don't know how to." Was his only reply that made Harry more confuse than ever.

What was Louis talking about? What does he not know? Is there anything that Louis doesn't know? Those were the questions running on Harry's mind.

He wasn't the smartest kid on the block, sue him.

"What?" Harry decided to voice out all the what is on his mind.

"I don't know how to... you know." Louis mumbled, shrugging like it was no big deal. Like Harry would just magically undestand what he was talking about.

Which again, he doesn't.

Harry sighed and gave up. He'll have a headache if Louis didn't stop from letting Harry burn all his braincells from working overdrive.

"Louis, what do you not know?" Harry muttered, a bit exasperated and confuse. 

Louis scoffed and just snapped. His confession making Harry dizzy and it was indeed something Harry wasn't prepared to hear at all.

"I haven't touched myself before okay!" 

There was a bit of silence after and then Harry threw all sense on the window and pulled Louis close as he kissed him deeply.

He pulled back a second to stare at him, his eyes almost black from lust.

"Jesus Christ Louis, that's really fucking hot, hell." He muttered before pulling him again.

Louis was surprised but didn't protest.

He didn't know why his inexperience threw Harry off and made him react that way. Harry's kisses were punishing but delicious and Louis felt like floating.

They've kissed numerous time actually and Louis always felt ligjt headed but this one, this will probably top his non existing list.

Harry was bitting his lips, sucking it and gnawing and his tongue was exploring every bit of Louis' mouth and Louis knew his lips will be bruised after.

Things were getting heated between both of them and Harry's exposed chest isn't helping. Louis has been wandering his hands all over and Harry was feeling every touch, every caress of those delicate hands of him.

His own hands had made their own journey and travelled below until it reached its goal. Louis round ass.

Harry's hands were big, abnormally even but it still wasn't big enough to grasp and hold Louis big plump ass. Harry revelled on it, massaging and pulling and just having the pleasure of feeling it on his hands.

Louis probably felt the same because he pulled away from their kiss to moan, loving the feeling of Harry's hand and his playful ministrations.

Louis was feeling really overwhelmed, his body was buzzing and he never felt like this before. The sensation was something he never once thought he'd feel and he knew it has something to do witj Harry. His pants were begining to get uncomfortable and his dick was painfully hard, his body was chasing something and rubbing off on Harry's stomach seems to be helping, increasing the feeling of pleasure.

Harry watched in awe as Louis grinds and bucks on his stomach, first ever so slowly then quickening it's pace and trying to chase off his orgasm. He smirked and continued massaging Louis ass, he placed his lips over his neck to kiss and nip at it and that made Louis moan harder, almost crying and tightening his hold on Harry's bicep.

When Harry licked and sucked below Louis' ear, Louis shouted and stopped his motions. His moans echoing in Harry's apartment and Harry knew his neighbours probably heard but who cares.

All he cared about was the bliss out look on Louis face as he came, his face covered in sweat and a bit of spit and Harry never felt more aroused in his life.

He was still rock hard but he didn't care, if he die right here right now, he'd die a happy man.

"H-Harry." Louis moaned lowly, shaking a bit.

His eyes were also getting droopy so Harry stood up and carried Louis on his bed. He was already half asleep and even if Harry wasn't able to release, he made sure to change and clean Louis up because he knew it was uncomfortable to sleep with cum covered underwear.

After making sure Louis was asleep and okay, Harry made a run on the bathroom and quickly jack himself off. His mind full of Louis' grinding and cumming and that was the quickest release he ever had in his life.

Chapter Text



Louis didn't understand why his face seems to be a permanent shade of red, the burning feeling on his cheeks never fades and he can't seem to make himself look at Harry in the eye. Harry who has been apologizing to him nonstop through messages for something that he didn't even do. Louis hasn't got the guts to see him last weekend as he locked himself in his room. He hasn't seen Harry in two days and Louis never knew two days was so damn long.

Louis was all to blame actually, Harry was just not helping but it already happened right? Louis finally experience an orgasm, after many years of just staring at his dick curiously but not having the guts to use it other than peeing. 

Louis heard of the famous orgasm but not to the extent of what he felt that night, he didn't imagine it to be some kind of feeling that's so powerful that it literally knocked him out cold. Maybe it didn't help that it was his first, or maybe because Harry was there. Harry probably tripled the feeling and honestly, Louis didn't regret it.

'Jesus, I feel like I lost my virginity but it's technically just rubbing off on Harry's stomach.' Louis sulkily muttered to himself.

Yes, it's been days but Louis just can't help but rewind the events over and over and can't seem to forget how fucking hot Harry was.

Louis suddenly felt himself getting excited and he quickly shook his head to remove the thought of a naked Harry on his mind, he was already growing hot and bothered and he knew his Biology class wouldn't like seeing his hard on.

"Mr Tomlinson, can you answer the second question."

Louis' eyes shot wide open when he heard that his teacher was calling, he wasn't even paying much attention. He shakily stood up and tried beating his brain up to recall what his teacher was saying but no luck, he wasn't really listening.

"Uh.. c-can you repeat the question sir?" he asked timidly, very embarrass because everyone's attention is focused on him.

His teacher seemed a bit surprise as well because this was the first time Louis didn't already know the answer nor hear the question as he was always attentive and ready.

"My question is, movement of cell against concentration gradient is called what?" the teacher repeated, still confused on his favorite student.

Louis sighed in relief because he knew this, but that doesn't mean he wasn't disappointed because he can see that Mr Berny was surprised of his actions.

"Active Transport sir." he murmured.

My Berny nodded but still sends Louis a questioning look before looking back at his power point presentation.

Louis sat back down at his desk and sighed, he wanted to knock some sense into his head and focus on his class. He couldn't dare have a little slip on his grades, Harry had sacrificed himself so that Louis wouldn't suffer and he will not take his sacrifice to waste.

All thoughts of Harry must be removed from his head at once... for now of course.

Soon the bell rang signaling the end of the class, Louis stayed behind and stared at the empty seat next to him. He suddenly felt some sort of dread at having to look at Harry's seat, so empty and no sleeping Harry to wake up after class anymore. He didn't know that not having Harry or seeing him will be this painful but what can he do, he was kicked out of school so he won't be seeing him around anymore.

"Hey Lou!" a voice shouted from outside.

Louis looked up from his desk to see Zayn's head popping out from the door.

"Zayn?" he asked as he stared at his friend confusedly, Liam and Niall’s head popping out next to him.

"It's lunch time, come on!" Niall cheered as if the greatest time of the day has arrived, which for him it is.

"Oh, right, sorry about that. Must have zoned out." Louis quickly apologizes and grabbed his bag before following his friends and heading out.

He shouldn’t forget that he still has his amazing friends with him but just a part of his is missing Harry, too used to having the curly headed boy with him during lunch.

Liam must have sensed his sadness because he quickly draped an arm over Louis while his other was holding hands with Zayn. It feels like they're branding themselves as the group of gay boys with how much touchy they are with each other. Well except for Niall because he seems to be more fascinated in girls. Poor Niall.

He was brought out of his trance by Zayn nudging his side.

"Don't worry Lou, Harry will be here after school remember?" Zayn piped in, giving Louis a reassuring smile. Zayb probably thought that Louis was sad because he was just missing Harry. It was half the truth though.

Louis sighed sadly and forced a small smile to not make his friend worry. He has mixed feeling of seeing Harry, excited and mortified. Harry had been messaging him earlier about seeing him after school and talking. The word talking scares Louis to death, because what was Harry going to say to him.

"Don't baby me too much you guys, i might get used to it." He said jokingly to make them believe his lie that he is not scared shitless of having any type of conversation with Harry that involves last weeks events.

It feels different being worried of having to see Harry and yeah maybe he was being kind of a baby and a coward, a lot coward of a sudden confrontation. It was Harry, what could possibly go wrong.

"It's almost graduation Lou, just a couple of months and you'll be back together."Liam chirped in happily.

His friends are all clueless of his existential crisis but Liams words hit him like a bullet.

Louis felt more dreadful of that. The thought of graduating without Harry feels like a total failure from his side. Louis shakes his head and rid himself with the awful feeling, Harry did this for him so he couldn't waste it.

"Yeah, you're right Liam."

They arrived at the cafeteria and everyone was staring at Louis. The words came out about what really happened and of course being in high school, everything is a big deal. Louis ignored it and made his way, he can see Niall glaring at people who were talking about him that made them shut up just as quick. Zayn was also trying to stop Liam from doing anything harsh because last time he almost kicked a guys face trying to defend Louis. He really love these guys.

"Will you attend the dance though later?" Zayn suddenly asked while they were falling in line to get some food. 

Ah yes, the dance that all student have been gushing about is tonight. How fun it was that the principal decided to do a high school dance on a monday night with classes the following day. Seems like Mr. Cowel is still doing his best of making the worst high school experience. Oh right, also have quarter exams tomorrow but nobody really cares except Louis, they'd rather worry of what they'll wear for a few hours rather than their 30% of their midyear grades.

But the thought of the dance still made his shoulder drop because he knew he couldn't. Besides being awful at social events, Louis didn't really know what was he going to do in an event that he almost ruined. He will also have to go alone because Liam has Zayn and Niall will probably ask Rhea out because he's been gushing about liking her for a week.

"I'll probably study at home for the exam tomorrow." He muttered nonchalantly.

"Oh come on Lou, you know we will be there." Zayn said while giving Louis some puppy dog eyes.

Zayn probably knew what Louis was thinking, Zayn can be really scary sometimes.

After getting their food, they all went to their usual table and started eating, making small talks here and there with Zayn and Liam begging for him to come to the dance  but Louis' mind was elsewhere, Harry to be specific.

"Hey Lou." Niall suddenly said while chewing some food which made Ouis frown because 'don't talk when your mouth is full right?' But the mention of his name made him stop playing with his food and pay attention.


Niall swallowed his food and held outg his phone to show to Louis and Louis can vaguely read the message.

"I just got a text from Harry." He answered.

Louis perked up from his seat at the mention of the curly haired boy and can feel himself smiling a little bit. But then the smile faltered when he realise that why did Harry text Niall and not him.

He has been waiting for Harry to text him earlier after class but his phone hasn't notified him of any new messages.

"Oh what is it? Why didn't he text me?" He asked.

Niall looked at his phone and read.

"He said your phone is off, he was trying to call you."

"What!?" Louis quickly took his phone and to his dismay, it was indeed dead.

He wanted to slam his head on his plate because no wonder there was no text coming.

"Oh no, I forgot to charge it." He groaned and decided to throw his phone inside his bag.

"What did he say?" He finally asked after cursing his stupid mobile for not working at times when he needed it most.

"Said he couldn't pick you up today, got some things to do."

Louis felt his shoulders sink and the sudden disappointing feeling in his gut. He was really hoping that he could see Harry after school, even if there was a part of his that wanted to run away, the urge to see him is always going to be stronger.

"Oh." Was his only short reply.

'What was so important that made Harry so busy anyway.' Louis grumbled to himself. Now he hated Harry for not showing up, although a while ago he was just plotting an escape route when Harry came and now he's not, Louis confuses himself sometimes...most times.

Now he wasn't going to the dance and won't be seeing Harry, great.




Class flew by so quickly that Louis didn’t have that much energy to pay attention to any of it. He knows that he’ll regret this but his mood was just not the happiest.

Does an orgasm comes with a side of PMS?

But he can’t really do much about lost time because the bell just rang and everyone was running out of school to probably prepare for that stupid dance. Yes, Louis hated that dance.

He might or might not have daydream in class about being with Harry tonight, he imagined Harry looking sharp in a suit and looking handsome as ever. He would ask Louis to be his date and Louis would feel like such a damn girl but who cares because he would really trade all of his A’s for a night like that with Harry.

But Louis doesn’t really have a clue on what he was in Harry’s life.

Yes, Louis’ life has completely reach rock bottom because his mind had wandered into quick sand aka his and Harry’s relationship.

They kiss, cuddle and Harry had saved his life and also secured his future but what have Louis ever done to him that’s completely life changing. To be honest, Louis never felt so useless because there was Harry, always there for Louis to count on but can Harry really count on Louis?

Maybe that was the reason that Louis made everything a big deal because Harry never really mentioned anything. Aren’t people who kiss and date supposed to have some sort of label…well that’s what Louis was imagining. Being able to call Harry his brings a sort of ticklish feeling on his stomach and he loves it, he’ll have some sort of reassurance that no one who’s better looking would steal Harry away from him.

“HEY LOU!” he suddenly heard a shout and Louis almosthad his heart jump from his chest.

“Christ Niall.” he groaned when he realized that it was just Niall.

“I’ve been talking to you and you don’t seem to be listening.” Niall pouted and Louis felt guilty because he is infact not paying attention…again

Niall had volunteered to take Louis home because Zayn and Liam suddenly had some urgent appointment and Louis knew it’s about the dance and Liam was trying to look just as handsome as Zayn because everyone knew Zayn would win as Dance King and Liam had this hope that he’ll be crowned King as well.

Their school isn’t homophobic…okay maybe it is but not like other schools were homosexuals are shunned or beaten up. Louis was very thankful because he didn’t even know he was super gay for Harry. Sexuality isn’t that of an issue with him and he accepted Mathew’s date because he really wanted to know what it feels like to go on a date but he never really fancied him.

“There you go again lost in your big stinky head.” Niall sighed while pinching Louis’ side.

“My head is not stinky.” Louis defended himself but gave Niall a short side hug.

He should be grateful that Niall was even here and not busy making himself look handsome, although his friends were already good looking especially Zayn, Zayn isn’t supposed to be considered human anyway.

“We’re here Lou.” Niall suddenly stopped and Louis was surprised that they are indeed infront of his house.

“Oh, well I guess this is where we part Niall. Sorry about not listening to you, I just have things on my mind.” he apologized sincerely because Niall doesn’t deserve such shitty friend like him.

Niall just grinned and immediately took Louis in a bone crushing hug.

“It’s fine Lou, everything will be okay trust me.”

And then he was running away and waving like crazy that Louis was concerned he’ll trip himself or worse. Louis didn’t know what he meant but oh boy does he want everything to be okay.

He walked to his house and had things already  planned for tonight, he has his own date and those are his books. He needed to study for finals tomorrow, even if he can already recite everything that was included in the exam, he still liked to feel the comfort of being ready.

When he was inside, he was a little confused because the house seems pretty quiet and empty which was really odd, he was expecting his mom and his dad in the living room, watching the evening news. He shrugged and went straight to his room but stopped midway the door when he noticed that his bedroom lights were open and he knew that he was the last one to leave the house and he had turned his lights off before leaving.

His heart suddenly started beating erratically and his mind running through numerous scenarios like a burglar on his house or a serial killer.

Louis had watched enough thriller movies to know that he should run but the curiosity killed him and he stepped inside his room, he gasped and almost jumped when he opened the door, expecting a scary man wielding a knife but it’s not, it was his room covered in petals and a black tailored suit lying on his bed.

“What the fuck.” Louis suddenly breathed out and his eyes roamed around to try and find what the hell was going on.

He walked to his bed to try and get a better look on the suit and noticed that there was a note attached to it.

He quickly picked it up and read what was written, his heart beating like mad that Louis was worried for his health. But it doesn’t really matter because he was more excited in the letter than his health…oops.

‘Wear this suit, hope it fits then meet me at the back of your house.’ –Hxx

Louis wanted so bad to shriek like a fucking girl but he was speechless and his mind was filled with continues mantra of oh my god. This was all Harry’s doing, Harry fucking Styles spread rose petals on his floor and gave him a suit. What romantic comedy had Louis been sucked into.

Nevetheless, Louis immediately took the quickest shower he can manage because he didn’t want Harry to wait too long, he wore the suit and Louis was curious into how Harry manage to get a suit that’s the perfect fit…and where the hell did he get it.

Oh well, Louis would still feel elated even if Harry stole it but dear lord he wishes Harry didn’t steal it in some store.

Louis didn’t even bother fixing his hair, he was already running outside to go to their backyard. He didn’t know what was going on but t felt so fairylike and it’s official, Louis’ life turned into some kind of fairy tail. When he ran around expecting something but not really knowing what will greet him. He stopped running and again lie what had happened earlier, he was left surprised with mouth hanging open that he was sure did not look in any way attractive.

Their boring old garden has turned into somekind of magical place with small fairy lights hanging around the trees, a small table was set in the middle with food and of course, fucking flower petals scattered on the ground.

Louis felt like crying because the thing that hit him most is Harry standing there, wearing a suit looking like a real prince and flashing him a handsome smile and behind him was a bad designed sign.

And written to it was ‘Will you be my boyfriend Lou.’

Of course that was the time Louis literally passed out.




Chapter Text

Louis felt a sudden ache on his head which made him groan, he slowly opened his eyes and the first thing that he saw were Harry’s worried looking ones.

“Lou? Are you okay?”

Louis’ head was blank, what the hell happened to him and why is his head throbbing so painfully.

Harry was quick to assist him when he slowly lifted himself up from where he was lying only to find out that he was on the ground. He also noticed that he and Harry where on their garden, their fairy tale like looking garden. Oh.

“Christ Lou, you scared the crap out of us.” Niall’s voice startled Louis and quickly looked behind where he saw his Irish friend, donning a perfectly white suit.

He also noticed Liam and Zayn who were kneeling at his other side and they both have equally worried look on their faces.

“Guys?” he asked questioningly when he realized all his friends were here.

And then his gaze wandered and that’s when his eyes caught a banner sticking out of a wall and every memory from today came crashing to him like a train and he was gasping for air and staring at Harry wide eyed and gaping.

Harry’s face was pale and he was sweating buckets, he almost endured a heart attack at seeing Louis fall in the ground. Niall, Liam and Zayn just arrived shortly after Louis collapsed and they had the surprised of their life at seeing Louis unconscious and Harry cradling his head carefully.

Louis wasn’t out that long, probably just a few seconds but if it was longer Harry was about to dash to the hospital carrying Louis as fast as he can.

But he was okay, Louis was fine just staring at Harry like he’d just grown another pair of head which would be funny if the circumstances were different. The sweats have come back and Harry never felt more scared at staring at Louis. He didn’t feel any type of nerves when he’s about to climb a ring and see his opponent who was bigger than him but right now, it’s Harry who’s feeling faint.

“So are you guys just gonna stare at each other the whole night?” it was Zayn who cut the tension with his remark, looking at Harry and then back at Louis.

“B-but...uh, what, you?” Harry stuttered out, not really know what he was going to say.

Louis stopped gaping like a fish but his face was getting all red and flustered. He pulled his gaze away from Harry and started fiddling with his fingers.

This wasn’t how Harry planned of asking Louis to be his boyfriend, this never even crossed his mind. How would he know Louis will suddenly faint because of his surprise?

“Harry.” Liam nudged his back, nodding at him reassuringly.

This wasn’t also part of it, their friends were supposed to arrive when Louis have already said yes and they caught them snogging each other like there’s no tomorrow. They should not be ogling at them and waiting patiently for each one to utter a word. Harry rarely experience things like this, Harry never acts like this.

Louis was refusing to look at him and it makes everything the more worrisome. What if he says no, what if he realized that Harry wasn’t the one for him because he’s too dumb and no future. That was Harry’s fear all this time, about Louis realizing that he deserved so much more than what Harry can give. Louis deserves the world if anyone asked Harry but he’s not all that sure he’ll be able to provide even a half of the things Louis needed. Harry was really on the verge of running away and locking himself in the basement in hopes of just dying and rotting in despair.

“This is pathetic even for you guys.” Zayn suddenly spoke which took Harry out of his trance.

Oh right, his friends were here to see him mess everything up.

Niall suddenly kneeled next to Louis and spoke. His face was all serious and Harry didn’t know what he was going to say.

“Harry was wondering Louis about what your answer is to his question about getting to finally bone you.” He asked half heartedly which made Harry gasped in horror.
Harry didn’t know Louis could get any redder.

“Niall!” Louis squeaked, looking scandalized but a smile was starting to appear from his lips and Harry can suddenly breathe a little better now.

“I’m kidding.” Niall exploded in hysterics at the look on his friend’s faces. Even Liam and Zayn let out a few chuckles. Trust Niall to ease the tense atmosphere and make it a joking matter.

Harry took a long deep breath and took Louis’ face by the chin, he needed to see the blue in Louis’ eyes to make sure that he was okay with all of this. That he wasn’t getting pressured to answer Harry and this is what he wants. Even if Harry knew Louis didn’t deserve him, he’ll make sure Louis feels like he’s the most precious thing to happen in Harry’s life.

“So um, yeah, what do you say Lou? Will you give me a chance of having the pleasure of calling you mine?” Harry knew his voice was weaker, more unsure than he ever had in his life.
Louis’ eyes started getting wet as he stared back at Harry and it feels like this was their moment, just the two of them. All the years of being with Harry, this moment was considered top in Louis’ list.

“I never wanted anything more.” Louis whispered, lips curling into a smile and Harry suddenly got the urge to kiss him.

“Yep, they’ve reach rock bottom everyone.”

Harry felt elated but trust Niall to also ruin the moment.

“Shut up Niall!” Liam and Zayn laughed as they tackled Niall to the ground.

“Oi! I’m wearing white you tossers!” Niall cried as they fell to the ground with a thump.

Harry didn’t’ stop himself this time as he hugged Louis tightly to his chest. Louis hugged him just as tight as if he can’t believe himself into what just happened. This was actually real, they were together now, officially.




The night didn’t end just like that.

Of course, Harry danced with Louis under the twinkling fairy lights as they stared at each other, eyes sparkling with happiness and their friends watching on the side.

Louis also found out that Liam and Zayn were the one who orchestrated the whole thing as Harry begged them for an idea on how to ask Louis’. Being the hopeless romantic couple as they are, they tried setting Louis’ backyard into a prom like get up. Niall was the distraction so that Louis wouldn’t get home early and Harry was the one who cooked the food set on the table. To Louis surprise, his parents were the one who bought Louis’ suit after Harry promised to pay them back. Harry had already asked for Louis’ parents approval to Louis’ surprise and didn’t know how to react after learning that his parents had agreed after her mom threatened Harry. His dad trusted Harry but still warned him about not getting his boys heart broken, Harry had to listen to his mom about how she will ruin Harry’s life if anything was to happen to Louis and of course his grades.

Louis felt like floating, he was so happy that his heart could burst with joy and love.

Because even if his life was a bit shitty, he still has all of this.





"Aw my head, Christ." Niall groaned as he slumped over the table.

They were all seated in the cafeteria eating lunch, Louis was really enjoying how Niall keeps complaining about his massive headache which in the first place was his fault because he couldn't stop himself from drinking. Also, the Algebra exam earlier did not help Niall's hangover.

"I told you to stop drinking but you wouldn't listen." Louis giggled and let out a low shriek when Niall threw a piece of lettuce on his face.

"Shut up, you would be doing the same thing when you realize all of your friends are happily in a relationship and you're the only single guy." Niall huffed as he downed the water he was holding on his hand.

Liam and Zayn snorted from where they were both busy reading their reviewers and feeding each other with fruits that Liam's mom made for the two of them. Louis kind of feel a bit jealous even if he and Harry are already official, he can't help but think that this could be them if Harry didn't get kicked out of school. They'd be disgustingly cute and no fucks given to anyone looking at them weirdly.

Louis doubted anyone could voice out their opinion with Liam and Zayn because most times most couples were just jealous because of the amazing connection they have, like they were soulmates.

Louis wonders if Harry was his soulmate.

"Hey Lou, do you mind letting me copy your answer on the exam later." Niall suddenly pleaded pulling Louis out of thoughts about Harry.

Louis rolled his eyes and stared at Niall in the eye who was equally staring at Louis and trying but obviously failing to look innocent and cute.

"You know I can't Niall, it's been a rule remember but I'll help you with key points so you know what'll be in the exam later." Louis encouraged him and tried not to get guilty at Niall's exasperated okay.

Louis had made it clear to his friends that he's not the cheating kind, it may seem unfair and selfish but Louis had experienced people using him and befriending him when in return Louis would make their homework, their projects and let them copy his exams.

It was during in middle school and Louis let those people do it because it made him less lonely, and they notice his existence. It continued until freshmen year but when Louis started refusing, they suddenly say hurtful things to him, push him around and helped Blake in torturing him, that's why Blake has so many minions under his control. They share the same hatred and jealousy that Blake has for Louis. Sometimes it made Louis think that his intelligence it's a curse but he can't do anything about it. They all stopped anyway when Harry came into his life and Louis was truly in awe of Harry because even if he has a shitty set of grades, he never once took advantage of Louis. Harry would just ask for Louis help about something which Louis will gladly explain with too much enthusiasm because Louis knows Harry really wanted to learn, maybe a bit too late because he's flunked a lot of subject but it's the thought that counts the most. Louis believed Harry was smart but grew up with people not helping him develop his abilities hence acted on violence which made him who he is now.

But everything is great, Harry had completely changed and for the better and Louis will make sure to be the best boyfriend he can be for Harry. Even if he doesn't have any fucking clue on how to be the best boyfriend ever.

"Oh my god.." Louis muttered when he realized he doesn't really know what a boyfriend actually do or what he's entitled to be.

Niall, Zayn and Liam all lifted their gaze from their notes and stared at Louis curiously.

"What's up Lou?" Zayn asked as he noticed Louis' panicked stricken face.

Louis was indeed panicking at the sudden realization, forgetting the formula that he was writing for Niall all together.

"I don't know how to be a boyfriend." Louis blurted embarrassingly as his face turned into a deep shade of red.

Niall's laughter suddenly burst which made other student look at them curiously at the sudden noise. Louis swatted Niall's arm when he grabbed the attention of the students inside the cafeteria. Liam and Zayn were also trying really hard to not burst into fits of laughter just like Niall did but they find it hilarious that their friend is having a sudden existential crisis in the middle of reviewing for their exam later.

"Hahaha god Louis, do you like need a book of how to be a boyfriend for dummies?" Niall continued laughing but suddenly stopped when a sudden pain on his head made him groan dramatically.

"That's what you get for being a bully." Louis smirked but still felt bad for Niall so he handed him his water.

Louis then turned to his other friends and stared at them expectantly. His eyes pleading for any answer to his sudden question.

Liam and Zayn stared at each other before staring back at Louis, they both didn't know what Louis expected from them.

"We really don't know Lou, I guess me and Liam just stayed true to ourselves and that made us feel happy about each other. We like to be comfortable with everything like treat each other as best friends." Zayn said with a small smile as he leaned his head on Liam's shoulder.

Louis' tooth was aching with their aggressive cuteness and display of affection.

Liam blushed red at Zayn's sudden action but leaned to it as well.

"We argue too, don't think that relationships are always butterflies and rainbows. It's normal to have misunderstandings but to us, we always make sure to respect each other's decision and try to make a suitable solution that will be benefit the both of us. Compromise is always the key, you can't both always win." Liam added.

Louis nodded at them as he tried to quickly write everything that they say down on his notes. His eagerness will equal a national competition wherein every single bit of detail is the answer to all life's question.

"And of course the sex." Niall added with a knowing grin that made everyone at the table red in the face. Their reaction made another bout of laughter out of Niall.

"You are so crude for someone who's a virgin." Liam chastised him like a dotting parent.

That made Niall instantly shut up and stared at Liam surprisingly, his mouth hanging open which was funny for Louis.

"You know nothing about my sex life Liam."

"Not after you told us last night Niall while you were drunk." Zayn snorted as he threw a piece of grape in Niall's horrified look. The grape landed straight to Niall's open mouth of course which made him splutter.

That was the breaking point for Louis as he burst into laughter, not even caring if anyone looked in their way because he was really really happy that he met all of them in some kind of twist of fate, like they were all meant to be friends.

Louis couldn't ask for a more perfect set of friends.

 After the initial laughter, Zayn looked at Louis and gestured for his phone.

"You should text Harry Lou and ask how his day is going, usually relationships are like that. When you're not together, you'd still like to have a sort of communication with each other."

Louis nodded and quickly wrote everything that Liam and Zayn were saying.

He needed to be good at this if he wanted Harry to never leave him, he'll be the perfect boyfriend as he is the perfect student.



Chapter Text



What are they talking about?’

"Harder." Paul shouted back at Harry. Positioning himself for Harry’s next assault.

Harry felt himself getting irritated when the corner of his eyes caught Louis playfully punching Luke’s shoulder and giggling.



Another Punch..

"Ow fuck Harry, I said right!" Paul shouted as he grabbed his now throbbing shoulder. Paul knew that Harry's punches were lethal and being in the receiving end of it wasn't fun.

Harry looked panicked for a minute and immediately went to Paul's side to check if he had broken something...again.

"Shit! I'm sorry Paul!" Harry apologizes and internally groaned because that was his fault.

He couldn't seem to focus right now especially if he can see Louis talking with Luke at the other side of the gym. 

He wasn't jealous, of course not. Harry doesn't get jealous over Louis having a few banter with Luke, Luke was a regular at the gym and he's a nice guy but Harry is kinda hating him right now. He wanted to punch Luke for making Louis laugh and Harry felt bad for feeling that way. Like he’s being territorial with Louis and that’s a little bit fucked up.

"Harry, you have an incoming fight this week. If this continues I'll be given no choice but to ban your boyfriend during training." Paul muttered seriously as he stared at Harry. He was slowly stretching his shoulder and testing if anything has been dislocated...again. This wasn't really the first that Harry has accidentally hit him. It had actually happened several times during sparring especially when Louis was there visiting after school.

"Nooo." I quickly said maybe a bit louder which caught the attention of a few people around the ring.

Harry had overreacted but he felt panicked at the idea of not getting to see Louis, this was the only time they can hang out because Harry has been doing odd jobs during weekends so that he can afford to pay for his apartment and helping out at the gym during weekdays because he owes Paul for helping him land a few fights. He’s been saving up all of his winnings so that he can take Louis out on something special. But if he can’t focus on his training, he might not be able to win this fight.

Louis seems to have also heard him and then he was quickly cutting his conversation with Luke and running up to the ring. He had a little bit of hard time climbing on the ring but he made it and a little bit out of breath.

"Is everything okay?" He asked worriedly, his eyes raking all over Harry's body as if trying to look for any injury.

Harry's heart swelled a little at how worried Louis look even if this was just a practice match and Harry isn't in any kind of danger, well, Paul might be.

"Everything is okay boo." Harry him as he gave Louis a reassuring smile.

He turns back to Paul with a serious look.

"I will not let this happen again Paul, I'm just tired so let's take a quick break and then let Ashton be my sparring partner. I'm sorry about the shoulder." Harry told him apologetically before pulling Louis out of the ring.

Harry heard Paul let out a sigh and an exasperated 'fine' as he dragged a suddenly very quiet Louis to the changing room.

Everyone’s eyes were trained on them but Harry ignored them all. He might or might not sent Luke a small glare when he passed him which made Luke flinch and look away. Good.

 "Is this my fault again?" Louis then asked when they reached the room.

Harry went to his locker to fetch a clean towel so he could wipe the sweat off of his body. After relatively drying his body off, he turns back to Louis who was now pouting adorably as he played with his fingers.

He stepped closer to Louis before pulling Louis' head up to angle on his face and leaned down to plant a soft kiss on his lips. He pulled away a few pecks after because Paul had warned him several times at not getting horny at the changing rooms.

Harry noticed Louis face turning red and his reaction never gets old. It was just simply too innocent and Harry is trying so hard not to just wreck him and make him scream his name. 

Harry shook his head and focused more on the matter on hand. It's quite literally hard especially if he's already getting a semi from that simple kiss. 

'Focus Harry.'

He took a deep breath and stared at Louis' with as much apologetic look that he can muster.

"It's not your fault Lou, honestly, it's more on me because I can't handle a simple jealousy." Harry said lowly, his face turning red as well because it was quite embarassing to be honest.

He wasn't usually one to act all cave man like.

"I'm not even doing anything Harry." Louis stated unsurely. The not really knowing how to be a boyfriend still lingers on his head. He was honest to god clueless but he's been learning, he's been reading cosmopolitan so that will help him right? He hopes so.

Louis broughy his attention back to Harry when he spoke again.

"I know boo, it's my fault. I should never see you as my property to own and you can talk to anyone you want without any restriction from me." Harry was pouting now, he wanted to faceplant his face on one of the locker doors but knowing how sweaty and dirty it might be, he decides against it.

He took a sit next to Louis and hauled him up so he was now sitting on his lap. Louis had squeaked in surprise but ended up giggling when Harry had comfortable seated him on his lap. Harry hopes Paul doesn't come in and see them, he'll get a right earful from him for sure.

Harry started rubbing small circles on Louis thighs and started explaining his piss poor excuse of an attitute to Louis.

"I've been in relationships before but I never felt so scared about losing anyone. I just can't stop myself from feeling that I'll lose you to someone better than me." He let out a small sigh and pulled Louis tighter to his chest, if only Louis and him can stay like this forever, Harry will be the happiest man really.

"It's always just gonna be you. Promise." Louis murmurs on his neck as he hugs back just as tight.

"I know, it's just me having issues. Do you hate me?" Harry suddenly asked because the insecurity was eating him. 

Who the hell wanted to be controlled in a relationship right?

Louis' brow knotted at hearing Harry say such things.

"Hate you? Don’t be absurd Harry.”

“You have a pretty fucked up excuse of a boyfriend.” Harry sighed once again, pulling Louis again so now he was the one leaning his head on Louis' chest.

He can hear Louis' heartbeat from this position and it feels rather calming.

“I wouldn’t want it any other way. Besides, it’s kinda cute that you get jealous.” 

Harry hears Louis let out a small cute laugh as he started playing with Harry's loose curls.

“I’m not cute.” Harry muttered with his eyes closed, just loving this moment with Louis altogether.

"I love you Louis." He whispers after a moment of them just enjoying each other's silence.

"I am very much inlove with you too." Louis replies and Harry felt Louis' pulse speeding up and he's so happy that he can get that kind of reaction from this amazing human being.

Harry could cry at how good that was to hear but he's not going to. He pulled Louis a few inch away and just stared at him. He had grown accustomed to staring at Louis that he had his face all memorised, from the acne scars on his face to the barely visible wrinkles on his eyes from too much smiling. That's how Louis should look when he gets older, wrinkles which was caused from pure happiness. Harry can literally be such a fucking sap sometimes.


"Um.." A sudden voice and a cough broke their gaze apart.

Harry quickly looked at the door and saw Ashton standing awkwardly and scratching the back of his head. He looks sheepish and a little bit red faced.

"Oh Ashton! How long have you been there?" Harry asked, he gently lifted Louis up and placed him on his feet.

Louis replied with a small thank you and kiss on Harry's cheek. Harry just grinned dorkily at him.

"Long enough to hate my life because I don't have a Louis." Ashton replies sourly at having to witness such tooth achingly display of affection.

"Fuck off mate, he's mine." Harry scowls. His demeanor changed instantly from loving to menacing that Ashton has to take a tentative step back.

Instead of being afraid, Louis took Harry's hand and laced it with his own which did the trick because Harry's face lightened up a little.

Ashton was impressed with their connection but decided not to anger Harry any further.

"Chill Harry, I love my life and I don't want to be murdered yet." Ashton replies jokingly.

"Asshole." Harry replied but he was now smirking at him.

Ashton felt like he had dodged a bullet, he took a mental note of not making any jokes about stealing Louis.

"If you're ready, Paul said we should start our practice in 3 minutes." 

Harry nodded.

"Alright, I'll be there."

Ashton gave a nod and quickly left the two alone.

When Harry was sure that no one was there or eavesdropping, he turns back to Louis.

"So I'll catch you later?" He asked because he mentioned earlier that he'll be walking Louis home.

"I'll be next to the ring watching so you wouldn't get distracted about me going around the gym." Louis said as he smiles at Harry.

Louis knew how important this fight was for Harry as he heard from Luke that a professional boxing trainer will be their to watch. This could be the break that Harry was waiting for him to go pro.

But Harry seems a little confuse and worried with Louis' answer.

"I'm not stopping you right? This is what you want?" Harry asked just to  ake sure.

Louis laughed and pulled Harry out of the changing room and back at the ring.

"Of course Harry, you're not forcing me into this. I want to watch my boyfriend punching people." Louis winks and Harry burst out laughing because he knew that was a lie, Louis hated seeing Harry punching people but the thought that Louis' wouldn't be talking to any sweaty guys in the gym puts him at ease.

"I love you." Harry said as they walked together with their hands intertwined.

"I love you too." Louis answers back just as quick and just as loving.

 Harry sure as hell wouldn't let this boy fly way out of his life, never.


 5 years later

Harry blinks as he stares at the empty gym, he has been sitting at one of the equipments and not minding the smell of sweat lingering on the air.

Paul seems to have upgraded a bit but it still looks like the old same gym that Harry used to waste all his time in when he was young. The poster he made about an advertisement was still posted on the side and next to it was a framed picture of himself, face a little bruised and teeth bloodied but still grinning widely while holding up his championship belt. Trust Paul to do something like that.

But Harry might be smiling on that day, but if you look deeper on his eyes you can see nothing but sadness. That was the time everything turned to shit.

Harry knew the gym became somewhat famous but there wasn't anyone inside, probably because Harry had called Paul and ask if he could visit. He knew Paul would close the whole gym just for Harry but Harry had hoped that he didn't.

The silence has been torturing him from the past 20 minutes of just standing there and all this memories crashing at him like a train.

Harry didn't know how it all happened but it felt like it happened so fast that he couldn't control it. It had spiralled into something so undeniably messed up that Harry didn't know how it ended up this way.

He had lost Louis.

No, he didn't actually lose him, he failed him.


Chapter Text

Flashing lights and the sound of loud music booming out of the room made him hope that tonight it'll be something different. 

Harry closed his eyes and took a deep breath before opening the door on his side and getting out of his car. He was instantly greeted by a lot of congratulations and cheers by people around him but he ignored it and decided to head straight in the club.

Upon entering the room, he tried to spot for his manager/friend Ben. Ben had told him earlier that he should come to the after party after successfully defending his title and defeating Frankie Simmons for the UFC Lightweight Championship.

Harry knew he shouldn't be attending but resting because his body was heavily bruised. It’s no secret that injuries are common in mixed martial arts. Minor cuts and lacerations are commonplace in an MMA fight. However, the injuries don’t stop there–more severe injuries like fractures, ligament tears, and head injuries are also common. Harry was pretty damn lucky for only getting a few minor injuries with his hand.

Although MMA and UFC fighters do wear gloves, they don’t necessarily protect the hands from all injuries. Broken fingers, ligament tears, and jammed fingers are all common hand injuries and Harry had experienced them at some point in his career.

Jammed fingers and minor ligament tears and fractures can often heal without the need for surgery. So Harry was very thankful that in his previous fights, he never had to have a major surgery.

But it was still a pain in the ass but he has to suck it up until it completely heals on its own. Tom has placed a cast over his elbow to immobilize the area and prevent Harry from moving it. Harry hated the damn thing and it was making him uncomfortable but Tom had warned him that he'll take him to a physical therapist if he removes it so Harry was stuck with a damn cast.

Harry's opponent Frankie wasn't as lucky though.

MMA and UFC fighters do not wear any protective head gear, and are therefore susceptible to head injuries. Though fighters are not allowed to strike another fighter’s head or face with a 12-6 (straight up-and-down) elbow, or hit the top or back of another fighter’s head and neck, other head and neck hits are still allowed.

Harry was able to hit Frankie a few times and he already recognized the signs of a concussion on him but he wasn't allowed to stop the fight or he'll lose. He was being subtle at motioning for the referees to check on Frankie because he doesn't want to continue hitting him which could lead to permanent brain damage.

If this was another fighter, Harry wouldn't care if he sends him to the emergency room because that was the nature of the sport. It was brutal, bloody and sometimes deadly and people who get in it are supposed to be ready to face the consequence of an abrupt death. But Harry knew Frankie and he met his wife and kids so he didn't want him to die or develop a degenerative brain disease known as chronic traumatic encephalopathy (CTE) which was common for someone who receives repetitive head trauma.

After believing Harry, the referee paused the fight to check and after confirming, they immediately finished the match and hailed Harry as the winner.

Harry had already made a name in the world of MMA fighting 4 years ago after a short career in professional boxing. Harry didn't really want to remember those days so he just focused on the present. 

"There's our champion!" A cheerful voice shouted from Harry's right and he shook his head and plastered an all too fake smile before greeting Ben.

Ben was wearing a suit and a pair of sun glasses which Harry found to be amusing because the room was already dark and the only light came from the strobe lights which is slowly making Harry's head ache.

A lot of people who heard Ben looked in their direction and cheered before going back in whatever business they were doing. To be honest, Harry doesn’t even know who this people are but he doesn't care because he's not planning on sticking around.

Ben quickly engulfed Harry in a hug and Harry just stood their awkwardly and patted Ben's back with his other hand which was not in a cast.

"I'm so glad you could make it Harry."

"Well yeah, this is supposed to be my party right?" 

Ben laughed loudly and placed his arm around Harry's shoulder.

"I want you to meet some people." 

He pulled Harry to the other side of the room where a group of people was seated and recognized some of them as part of the UFC Organization. He had met them but he doesn't really remember their names nor care. 

"Harry Styles, pleasure to finally see you with a shirt on and not looking deadly." A middle aged woman spoke after Ben had introduced him to them. 

"Pleasures all mine." Harry replied with a smirk.

Harry didn't want to be here but they are practically the reason why Harry has a career so he has to deal with fake compliments and pleasantries. Ben had told him it was important that Harry was on their good side to benefit in the future and upcoming fights.

 "I watched your fight back there boy and if the referee didn't end the match then you would've destroyed Simmons. Would have loved seeing that." Another man spoke while he laughed.

Harry wanted to punch him so bad because that's all they wanted to see. Not caring about other people's life if it ended or not because they were only there for the entertainment. Times like this makes Harry wonder why he's still here but Ben's knowing look makes him stay.

"We're absolutely happy that you made the after party but I have to take our Harry here to meet some major fans." Ben happily said before gesturing to another group somewhere around the room.

Harry didn't really care but he really wanted to just leave and go home.

Ben then pulled him towards another crowd and started introducing him but he paid them no attention. Unlike earlier which consist of being part of a big organization, these people were just random rich ones who happens to afford the luxury of being here.

"Um Ben, I'll just go get some drinks yeah?" Harry told him as he pointed at the bar.

Ben gave him a nod and went back to whoever was he speaking so Harry left.

He was stopped by a few people but Harry didn't talk to them. He wasn't really in the mood to be socializing. He just wanted to get drunk, go home and sleep.

When he arrived at the bar, he ordered a mojito and the bartender was trying so hard not to make a face. Harry knew bartenders hated making those drinks but Harry never really cared so he waited until his drink was done.

A random lad approached him and started talking about Harry's fight, a girl joined them and plastered herself to Harry's side, obviously flirting but Harry still ignored them.

He didn't listen to the conversation they had and took a glass of whatever alcohol was being served and drank it. The bitter taste making him cringe but welcoming it because he wanted to just get rid of the thought of being surrounded by a lot of people but still feeling so damn alone.

He wants to snap at the girl that he was gay but she probably already knew because Harry wasn’t in the closet. He was very much out but Ben had told him that he should not personally broadcast it because sometimes it causes some problems. There are quite a few MMA fighters who didn’t want to fight Harry not because they were afraid but because he was gay. The UFC Organization wasn’t sexist because they opened the gates for female fighters but it was silently homophobic before. Harry knew they proved them wrong after they doubted him at the start and they pretty much respected him now. Now there was already a few openly gay fighters who broke the stereotype and it never causes much of an issue unlike in the Boxing federation. It was one of the reasons Harry left professional boxing, most people are old homophobic dicks who cry out in rage when Harry wins.


Harry heard his name being called several times but he didn’t even look at them but even in the middle of nowhere he would recognize that voice so he quickly drank his mojito and turn towards his friend.

“Nick!” Harry greeted him.

Harry felt at ease knowing he had someone here that he knew and trust. Nick was a nurse and he met Harry a few years back when Harry got his nose checked after breaking it at a fight. Nick flirted at him nonstop and Harry found it very amusing so he got his number and they have few casual sex but it ended after Nick found a boyfriend and they were still together now but they remained friends because there wasn’t any emotional attachment between them, just plain friends with benefits. Harry nor Nick became too close friends that the thought of being together now disgust them.

“I’ve been looking everywhere for you mate.” Nick was about to give him a hug but he noticed the girl who was still rubbing her tits at Harry’s side. The random lad has already left after being purposely ignored by Harry so he was just stuck with her.

Nick looked at Harry with his eyebrows raised and Harry sighed. He looked at him in return and gestured for him to make her go away.

Nick laughed because he already knew what Harry was trying to say just by that look.

“Excuse me little girl, but maybe you’re already pass your bedtime so move along and go home.” Nick smirked.

The girl looked at him as if questioning who he was and if he was important.

“Little girl? I’m 30 you asshole.” She snaps.

Harry and Nick burst out laughing because they would never have guessed her true age which wasn’t any better because he was 6 years older than Harry.

“Oops my bad, sorry about that grandma.” Nick added still laughing loudly. He just couldn’t stop.

She might have gotten deeply offended by that remark so she instantly slapped Harry at the face and left.

“I didn’t even say anything!” Harry said still laughing and not even caring is she had hit him.

Laughter slowly died down and Harry just ordered a few shots and looked back at his friend.

“My my, are you getting a little old Harry. You should shave your face because it keeps attracting a lot of cougars lately.” Nick said after downing his shot.

“She wasn’t that old Nick.” Harry replied after drinking his own.

Now that he had Nick by his side, he was more confident on getting hammered because he trust him to take care of him when he gets carried away.

“She also doesn’t have a dick Harold.” Nick added with a waggle of his brows.

“I’m aware.” Harry snorted.

"You should probably get a phone so that I wouldn't have such a hard time locating you."

Harry shook his head and turns to the bartender when he called his name for his order. Harry didn't own a phone because he just didn't want one. He also doesn't have any social media accounts because he thought it was just pointless. 

People would contact him through Ben and Ben will then report it to Harry.

Besides, Harry knew that when he gets a phone or a social media account, he'll just end up stalking someone and he promised himself that he wouldn't. So any form of contact was erased from him and Harry became a secluded person. It was really fucking sad and when Harry starts thinking about it, he turns to his favorite friend, alcohol.

So it became shots after shot and Harry was getting a bit light headed but he was giving no other care as he and Nick danced, jumping and swaying through the music. A lot of people dared to dance with him but he pushed them away because he didn't want some random people grinding on him. Harry always wanted to release a lot of pent up energy on his body but he was always refusing to any willing person. Because the truth was, he never wanted any other else.

But when he gets drunk, he knew his body and his mind was too weak to resist and he would pounce on anyone but tonight was different because he was trying to find anyone who resembles him for even a tiny bit of detail.

"Harry you're drunk." Nick insisted as he dragged Harry away from the crowd and pulled him to the side when he left him to get some water.

Harry stayed still as he leaned on the wall and looked at the people around. His arm which was wrapped in a cast was getting itchy and irritable and he wanted to rip it off. He was deciding against it because the uncomfortableness is much more bearable than getting to visit a physical therapist.

Nick returned after a few minutes and handed Harry some water.

"How about I take you home Harry." Nick suggested and Harry just nodded in return.

They exited the room and Nick helped Harry get inside the passenger car while he sat on the drivers seat.

Harry leaned his head on the window and stared outside as Nick drove him home. 

"I miss him." Harry suddenly sighed after a few minutes of silence in the car.

Nick didn't say anything because Harry has always mention a him but never a name. It was quite devastating for Nick to see Harry like this but he never knew the reason because Harry never tells anyone what happened.

They have been friends for years but Nick knew little about Harry's life because he was just not sharing anything and it had brought several arguments but Nick just decided it wasn't worth fighting about. If Harry decides to share it to him, he'll listen but right now he couldn't do much but help Harry forget who this person that caused him to hurt this much.

Nick kind of hated that person even without completely knowing him.

So the drive into Harry's house was quiet. Nick knew Harry has been silently crying without even looking and it wasn't even the first time he did. He was like this every time he gets drunk and Nick drives him back home.

Nick wanted so badly to fix Harry but Harry doesn't want to be fix, he just wanted 'him'.




Chapter Text


Back to the Past we Go!

5 years Before



"Our class valedictorian is none other than, Louis Tomlinson."

Some students clapped, not really surprised by the announcement and Louis would have flushed in embarrassment because of the attention but he was busy trying to cover his Niall's mouth because they were shouting and making a really embarrassing scene.

"Woo that's me friend Louis, he’s right here!" Niall cheered from where he was sat while clapping his hands dramatically.

"Niall!" Louis hissed.

Trust Niall to get all dramatic and crazy. Louis suspected that he was a bit drunk because he remembered him saying that he’ll be celebrating nonstop when finals was finished. Finals were a week ago so Louis was suspicious into what Niall was getting into.

"Congrats Lou!" Zayn said as he pulled Louis away from Niall and into a bone crushing hug.

"You deserve it Louis." Liam added as he also hugs Louis but ended up hugging Zayn as well.

The students behind them just rolled their eyes and trained their attention back to the principal with a bored look.

They were all gathered in the gym for the graduation rehearsal and the principal was just announcing the awardees for graduation. Louis couldn't believe how time flew so fast and here he was, about to graduate high school and begin another journey, the whole valedictorian thing was just an additional icing on the cake.

Louis really feels like he's about to burst into tears because he survived school and he's surrounded by his amazing friends and his parents will be so damn proud of his achievements. Life could not be any more perfect for him.

"Okay settle down Mr. Horan before I send you to detention." Mr. Cowell, the principal said as he sends Niall a small glare.

Niall mock salutes him before sitting back on his chair and giggles.

Yep, Louis figures Niall was not quite sober.

Louis shook his head and tries to concentrate on the other names mentioned on the list, his name was mentioned a couple of times but he forgot after the fifth one being the outstanding math student. To be honest, he was just not that thrilled on graduating because for many reasons involving a curly haired boy.


Louis would kill (hypothetically of course) just to celebrate graduation with Harry. So no one can really blame him if he’s a bit sad when the list of graduates was posted and Harry’s name was crossed out of the list.

Harry on the other hand was nothing but supportive, especially during Louis' final, he accompanies him during reviews and calms him when he starts freaking out about failing his exams. Louis really loves everything about Harry even if he falls asleep in the library and finishes his game of candy crush on his phone but never complains about anything. Harry wanted to be there next to Louis even when they barely talk because Louis got too engrossed on his notes and worrying for the hundredth time if he got the weight of the all the elements in the periodic table which in fact he already does.

It's not like Harry didn't have anything better to do, he didn’t sit all day listening to Louis recite formulas, in fact there are a few times where Harry had to go to training. After winning his most recent match, he got a call from some famous professional boxer's manager and offered him to be a sparring partner for his client. It wasn't that bad considering the said boxer was well known according to Harry but Louis always forgets his name and never bothered to consider it.

Harry was at the gym right now with Paul and he and Louis will be meeting later tonight. Harry mentioned that he still has to train even if he was just a sparring partner. Louis doubts he needed it to be honest but he was probably biased.

So Louis was really bothered at not having to hear from Harry, training was supposed to be over half an hour ago.

"I would like to congratulate you all once again, please prepare for the ceremony on Monday and be on time." Mr Cowell spoke and then everyone was cheering and standing up. Dismissal was always the best part during rehearsals.

Louis gripped his phone tightly and waited anxiously for Harry's text. He should be texting him almost three hours ago but his messages were yet to be seen.

“Hey Lou, we’re gonna stop by at my house. We’re having a BBQ and my mom wants all of us there.” Zayn said after the other students have completely left the gym.

“A BBQ? Isn’t the weather too shite for that? And aren’t you guys not supposed to eat meat?” Niall asked with no filter at all.

Louis heard a thump and he knew Liam must have hit Niall in the head.

“It’s chicken BBQ Niall.” Liam squawks and Zayn laughs next to him.

They were about to leave as well but Louis was just too busy looking back and forth to his friends and to his phone to notice that he was about to walk straight to chair.

He almost lost his balance if it weren’t for the hand that gripped his side and steadied him.

“Better focus on your surrounding more Lou.”

Louis whipped his head to fast at having almost memorized Harry’s voice but he probably didn’t do it because before he knows it, his head was hitting Harry’s face.

“Ouch!” they both muttered as they massaged their throbbing head.

Louis felt his eyes water due to the pain but he didn’t really care that much, he was a bit startled to find Harry, who was in fact not allowed to be in school but here he was.

“That was not the type of entrance I planned to be honest.” Harry muttered as he groans painfully, clutching his forehead which was starting to redden.

In the background, he can here the other boys snickering and Niall openly laughing, not even bothering to be discrete about it.

“You two are the best really, like a proper show.” Niall sighs after calming down.

Harry rolled his eyes but quickly took Louis’ face to check if he had any injury, after noticing the slightly red skin, Harry quickly kissed it. Louis squirmed at the sudden show of affection, he was just getting used to being this close to Harry when they were alone and not while his friends were staring at them and watching the scene.

But he can’t really help if he smiles and blushes at the gesture.

“Okay, none of that PDA. I don’t want to hate myself for being single right now. Let’s all head out to Zayn’s.” Niall said while muttering something under his breath about being the only single one in the group.

The other two followed laughing and Harry was laughing as well but Louis was a bit stuck, still frozen in place and staring at Harry in wonder.

“What are you doing here?” Louis finally found his voice and asked.

Harry turned his attention to him and he smiled, dimples showing and adorning his cheek. Louis’ heart fluttered a little at the sight. Harry’s dimples are probably the thing Louis loved most about Harry.

“Battery’s dead again so I thought I’ll just head straight in here and voila.” He beamed.

Louis shook his head but smiled nonetheless. Harry was definitely in a good mood and Louis can’t help it, it was contagious. It was like when after a long and suffering amount of rain and the sun suddenly appears, you can’t help but enjoy its presence. That’s how Louis pictures Harry’s smile, it was the sun after a series of storm.

But that was the thing that’s bothering Louis a bit, Harry’s character sometimes prevents him from acting to cheery, of course he was happy, but his happiness was not this bright. Today, it was too blindingly bright.

“You’re in a terribly good mood.” Louis said, sounding a bit suspicious.

“Am I? Well it’s probably because I get to see you.” Harry laughs.

Louis was trying very hard not to point out how fake it sounded and Harry must have noticed it as well because he avoids Louis’ eyes and scratched his neck awkwardly. Squirming at the intensity of Louis’ gaze.

“We just saw each other yesterday.” Louis said.

“Can’t I be glad to see my boyfriend?” Harry finally sighs, defeated.

Louis panicked because he did not want this to happen all of the sudden. He instantly regrets his actions because now Harry looked bothered but if he was acting strangely to begin with, isn’t it supposed to mean something? Was Harry hiding something from him?

“Harry-” Louis started was but was quickly cut off.

“Let’s just eat some chicken BBQ yeah?” Harry asked as he gestured to where their friends have gone.

Louis stared at him for a moment but nodded along.

“If you say so.”

Louis can’t really seem to push away the nagging feeling in his gut but decided to ask Harry about it later. Harry would never lie to him, right?



They all arrived at Zayn’s house and was instantly greeted by Zayn’s mother Trisha, she hugged all of them but focuses her attention to Liam who was smiling so wide and blushing a bit.

“Liam, good to see you again. I hope you could come more often, I’ve missed you.” She gushed as she pinched Liam’s cheeks.

“Did you forget your son is here? Hello?” Zayn sighed.

Louis giggled under his breath because Zayn had mentioned that his mom really adored Liam to bits. Trisha knew the relationship between his son and Liam and she has no problem about it, she was actually very supportive, too supportive. Zayn kicked Niall after he suggested that she has the hots for Liam and the gene pool never sailed too far away because now they both fancy the same person. Louis never felt sorry for Niall when he fell to the floor because he was literally asking for it.

Liam was embarrassed but he was too nice for his own good so he let himself be smothered, he didn’t really want to get on the bad side to his future mother in law. For him, it was better like that rather than be treated coldly and with hate.

“I promise to visit more often.” Liam politely replied.

Trisha pinched his cheek one more time before she invited them inside and let them to the backyard where Zayn’s other family members were.

Louis met Zayn’s family a lot of times because he and Zayn liked to hang out in his house, he grew pretty close to his sisters as well and sometimes a tinge of jealousy will rise because he wishes he has a large family of his own. Having only his mom and dad with him and no siblings is quite sad.

“Go get yourself some plates boys and help yourself.” Trisha said to us and then she turns to Liam.

“Liam, can you please come with me so that I can introduce you to my sister.” She asked but she was already pulling Liam to the direction of Zayn’s aunt, Liam’s face was panicked but couldn’t do much but be pulled away.

“Moooom.” Zayn grumbled and followed along, leaving the plates he got for Liam and himself.

Niall laughed shortly and then proceeded to stack his plates with food.

Louis then only noticed that Harry was awfully quiet from behind him so he turned around and surprised that Harry was in fact not behind him.

He left his plate on the table and went to search for Harry inside the house, thinking all sorts of things but he paused on his step when he heard Harry’s voice, talking softly to Zayn’s youngest sister, Safaa.

“Oh wow, did you do this yourself?” Harry asked.

Louis didn’t know what they were talking about so he stepped closer to the room and found Safaa sprawled on the floor next to Harry and showing him her art works.

“Yes! I want to be like Zaynie when I grow up.” She said as she handed another drawing to Harry.

Harry thanked her and showed her how he reviewed the details of her coloring and pointed out how flawless her shades were. For a children’s drawing, Harry seemed too intent at giving her precise feedbacks which Louis thinks Safaa didn’t really understand but she seems delighted.

Louis’ heart swelled at the sight because he never really saw Harry interact with children before and never actually wondered how he acts around them. His brooding and not so child friendly acts around people didn’t really go unnoticed so Louis would have guessed that Harry was awkward around kids.

“If you keep drawing and practicing, I’m sure you’ll be better at drawing than Zayn.” Harry said after putting down the last of her drawings.

Safaa looked elated at Harry’s words. Safaa always adored his brother Zayn and it means the world for her if she gets to be as good as his brother.

“Really? Are you sure Harry?” she asked.

“Oh, I am not just sure, I am very very sure. You’ll probably be better than um… wait” Harry said, brow furrowing in concentration. “I forgot his name, but he drew this girl and she was smiling but not really smiling and-.”

“Leanorado Da Vinci.” Louis answered for Harry, slightly laughing at Harry’s explanation of Da Vinci’s famous painting.

Louis instantly got the attention of the two people in the room and Safaa was quick on her feet and ran towards Louis.

“Loulou!” she shouted as she launched herself at Louis and Louis was quick to catch and her and steadied her on his hip.

“Hello there Safaa, I see you’ve been showing Harry your masterpieces.” Louis said as he ticked her for a bit.

She laughed and begged him to stop so Louis did. When she can finally talk again after breathing hard, she turns to Louis with excitement in her eyes.

“Harry said I can be better than Zayn.” She said proudly.

“Well if you keep it a secret, I always think your drawings are better than Zayn but don’t tell him because he might cry.” Louis made a shushing motion with his hand.

Safaa did as well and asked to be put down which Louis did and as her feet lands on the floor, she instantly ran towards the backyard, she’s probably going to tell Zayn about what Louis said leaving Harry still sprawled on the floor and Louis staring at her retreating back.

Louis smiled and looked back at Harry who was now looking at Louis, a smile on his lips.

“You did great with Safaa, boosting her confidence.” Louis managed to say.

Harry shrugged and stared back at the drawings below him.

“Her drawings are really good.”

“Probably, good as a 5 years old drawing will be.” Louis rolled his eyes and laughed.

Harry laughed along and pulled himself to a sitting position, he patted the spot next to him, asking Louis to take a seat himself.

Louis knew that this was probably going to be the time Harry will explain his odd behavior, Louis took a deep breath and tried to send a mental note to himself to calm down and don’t start doubting Harry. Let him talk and then he’ll start judging if judgement is needed.

Louis hopes Harry did not kill someone or cheated on him. Louis would die inside if it happens, the cheating part rather – Louis will probably help Harry hide a body if he ends up killing someone and Louis prays it never happens. He knew Harry was sexually active because damn the boy has a body to die for, a lot of people will kill to have it. Louis would probably kill them first if they did but that’s another story for another day. The truth was, Louis was very worried about not being able to give Harry anything because he was too damn scared to do so and now Harry might have found someone who didn’t think twice about jumping in bed with him and now he’s dumping him.

When he sat himself comfortably next to Harry, thoughts consuming every part of him, they let a few seconds of silence before they were both blurting things at the same time.

“Are you breaking up with me?”

“I’ll be leaving for a month.”

They both tried to process what the other person had said and when they did, they were in synced again when they asked, “WHAT?!”

Louis’ eyes were already starting to dampen at what Harry had said, he was leaving, he was leaving Louis. He was about to shout his protest but Harry was quick to cover his mouth.

His face was serious but sad and Louis didn’t want to hear Harry say some cheesy break up tagline in Zayn’s house.

“Calm down Lou” Harry said as he wiped Louis’ eyes.

“You really are breaking up with me?” Louis whimpered, heart starting to ache in his chest.

Harry sighed and pulled Louis over his lap. Lifting him up as if he never weighted a thing. He hugged him close and continued drying his eyes gently.

“Lou, of course I’m not breaking up with you.” Harry murmurs.

“But you said you’re leaving for a month?” Louis asked in confusion because why would Harry leave a month, but can you really break up with someone and put a time limit to it?

“Because I received a call, from that manager, do you remember him?” Harry explained softly.

The light in Louis’ head suddenly lit up.

“The sparring partner thing?” he asked unsurely, fiddling with his fingers absentmindedly.

Harry nodded “Yes, he called me and asked if I can come with them on training. Says his client has a match in Vegas and wanted me to tag along.”

“Vegas!?” Louis asked in surprise.

Vegas was too fucking away from London, exactly another continent away so imagine Louis’ surprise.

“Yeah, it’s a big fight and training’s full time.” Harry said like it was not that big of a deal.

Louis bit his and imagine the distance between him and Harry. Vegas wasn’t something you can just take a cab or a train to be able to get into. Louis will need to ride a plane, afford rather expensive tickets and get a passport which he still hasn’t had.

Distance was the issue here.

“So you have to leave for month?” Louis muttered under his breath.

“Yes.” Harry replied, rubbing Louis’ back softly.

Louis blinked a couple of times to regain the train of thoughts in his head before turning towards Harry and staring at his face, wanting to memorize every inch of his face in case he forgot. Louis doubts he’ll be able to do.

“What do you think? I can always turn the offer down Lou, I wouldn’t do something you don’t like.” Harry said softly, staring at Louis and giving him a small smile.

Louis couldn’t help but flick Harry on the forehead which made Harry wince.

“Oh my god Harry, that’s like a big thing. This could be the start of your career!” Louis scolded him because this was a decision that Harry should have taken and not given to Louis.

“Don’t get ahead of yourself Lou, it’s just a sparring partner.” Harry said in a matter of fact tone.

Louis wanted to flick him again but decided against it.

“In Vegas!” he exclaimed rather loudly and dramatically.

“Okay, it’s a big thing but your graduation is coming up. I can’t miss it.” Harry explained seriously, his brow furrowing midsentence.

“Oh Harry.” Louis took Harry’s face to his hands and stared at his wonderful face.

Harry was always thinking about Louis and always forgets about himself and for Louis it was cute and endearing but also very annoying.

Look what resulted into his selfless action, not graduating.

“You sacrificed your own future for me by getting expelled, I want you to stop sacrificing things for me and start thinking about yourself first.” Louis said wholeheartedly.

Eyes going soft as he remembers every selfless stupid act Harry ever did for him. This was actually the time Louis did something for Harry and the distance was going to be painful but probably worth it.

“But Lou-“ Harry interjects but Louis shuts him up with his hand, Harry’s next words getting muffled.

“No buts, you should go and make a name out of yourself out there.” Louis reprimands him like a child.

“As a sparring partner.” Harry rolled his eyes but laughed when Louis playfully slapped him.

“Harry!” Louis huffed his annoyance.

“Okay okay, but are you sure?” Harry checked.

Louis nodded eagerly and never felt any surer of his answer.

“I’m very sure.”

“I love you.” Harry spoke suddenly but lovingly.

He pulled Louis closer to him and placed his head on Louis’ chest, their position was just right for Louis to lay his head on Harry’s head and Harry leaning on his chest.

“I love you too,” Louis replied, smiling to himself while playing at Harry’s curls.

Harry hummed on his chest and comments about Louis smelling wonderful.

Louis blushed bright red but can’t help but feel deeply appreciated.

Harry then slowly pulled away and stared back at Louis.

“So mind explaining why you think I’m breaking up with you?” Harry asked bemusedly.

Louis eyes widen and mentally cursed himself because he almost forgot about his sudden declaration earlier. He hoped Harry had already forgotten in the midst of their conversation but Harry was too perceptive to let something like that go unnoticed.

“Um well.” Louis felt like he was a deer caught in headlights.

He wasn’t sure if it was wise to tell Harry about his thoughts. They were a bit messed up so he was worried on how Harry will be able to handle them.

“You can tell me.” Harry urged him gently.

Louis coughed awkwardly and refused to meet Harry’s eyes.

“Um, I though because I don’t give you sex that means you would leave me.” He murmurs.

He didn’t know what Harry’s reaction was but he heard him speak after a minute.

“Louis William Tomlinson.”

“I’m sorry.” Louis cried helplessly, both ashamed and truly embarrassed.

“Do you really think so low about me? That I will break up with you because of sex?” Harry questioned sadly, Louis can actually feel the sadness seeping out of Harry’s words so he was quick to jump and grasp Harry’s face, his eyes were pained and Louis felt so horrible he wanted to fling himself in an oncoming bus.

“No! I don’t, I’m just stupid and I would never Harry! You’re amazing and you never stop showing how amazing you are.” Louis admitted, wanting Harry to feel how he truly appreciate him and he was just being stupid and insecure.

Louis knew he didn’t have the best body, the best skills so he was insecure and Harry shouldn’t feel burdened about it, it was all Louis’ fault.

“Even if we never have sex ever, that’s okay with me.” Harry admitted.

That was such a big statement and Louis should have never doubted Harry ever.

“I know, I’m sorry.” Louis apologized again.

Harry only smiled and pulled him close so that he can land a quick kiss on his lips. Louis wanted to pull him back because he wanted to feel his lips on him but restrained himself because someone can walk in on them. They were rather in an uncompromising position and Louis will probably die of embarrassment if Zayn’s grandmother sees them.

“You really are supposed to be smart Louis, stop jumping into conclusions okay?” Harry spoke after a few seconds of just hugging Louis.

Louis cursed at how Harry stared at him like he hung the fucking moon so he wasn’t to blame if he was the one who pulled Harry closer to kiss him hard. Louis was just about to start slipping his tongue on Harry when he heard a sudden scream behind him.

“Mooom! Louis and Harry are kissing!” Safaa shouted as she dashed away, her footsteps echoing in the room.

Louis quickly pulled away and grew red in embarrassment, Harry bursting into laughter below him.

“Safaaa!” Louis heard Zayn shout from the backyard.

Louis groaned and wished the ground would open up and swallow him. Damn Harry for being so irresistible.








Chapter Text



Everyone was shouting, someone was screaming on top of their lungs to call a damn ambulance already but the only thing Harry registers are the hands carefully assessing the nasty cut on his head that's making him light headed.

Harry can faintly see the dark liquid, can actually feel it dripping down onto his face.

Although feeling like he's going to pass out any moment, Harry still tried to stand up into his feet. Ignoring the pleads from his coach to stay where he is so that he can get medical attention because he has a three fucking inch of a cut on his head that's making him bleed out to death.

But Harry was just not giving up.

"My God Danny, it seems Style's is still ready to fight." Harry heard from the speaker where the commentators where conversing with each other and how the fight was unfolding.

"Is he though? He looks like he came out from a very gory horror movie." Was the reply from the second commentator.

Harry can only imagine how he looked but he was determined, he will not be tapping this one out. Gerry, his personal trainer will surely skin him alive if he ever gets out of this match alive. He'll probably fetch Harry from the afterlife only to beat him up again.

"But look at the determination on that kids face." the commentator said gesturing to the look on Harry's bloody face.

"Well if it's any consolation, his opponent Wesley isn't doing any better. He's limping quite terribly."

Harry was well aware of the injury he had caused to Wesley after a heel hook that he pulled off in the middle of the fight which devastated Wesley's knee but still refused to tap out.

"You just don't know how to quit don't you?"  Wesley growled at Harry, feeling agitated because he was so sure that he could have knocked Harry off with his spinning wheel kick, Harry got a bloody head from it already but he was still able to stand into his feet.

"Can't get rid of me that easy." Harry smirked, his mouth bloody.

Harry knew he needed to win this match, no matter how badly he wanted to just close his eyes and pass out, he knew he couldn't.

He stayed on his spot, waiting for Wesley to make the first move because he needed to save as much energy as he had left to finish this fight.

He will not lose this fight.

Wesley might think that he might already have the advantage because of Harry's current condition so he immediately tried to tackle him which was the move Harry was expecting. Before Wesley's body can fully get to Harry, he had immediately side stepped to his right which gave him enough time to do his final move by unleashing a looping punch on an unsuspecting Wesley and tackling his body down to the floor, taking a hold of Wesley's arm and legs and gripping them quite painfully with his arms and his thighs. He just got Wesley into the ever famous twister move.

Wesley shouted in pain and simply couldn't handle being wrenched and contorted by Harry, he was about to tap out and surrender but Harry had took hold of his arms, not yet ready for Wesley to leave this fight. Wesley knew what Harry was doing and was almost crying in pain.

Breathing heavily, Harry had inched his face closer to Wesley so he can whisper something into his ear that no one could possible hear.

"You just got your ass handed to you by a faggot." Harry angrily whispered, not quite forgetting what Wesley had taunted him in the beginning of the fight that got Harry's blood boiling.

Wesley had snickered to Harry that he was nothing more than a faggot fighter who used to suck the higher ups cock to reach the top and who couldn't possibly defeat the Great Wesley Rogers, UFC Hall of Famer and undefeated in the Industry. If there was anything that can get Harry royally pissed is a fucking homophobic opponent and someone who undermines his abilities.

Wesley just cried harder and apologised profusely, Harry took enough pity after looking at his face and let him tap his hand out immediately. Harry let him go when the announcer had shouted him as the winner for today's match, the crowd cheering nonstop for Harry's victory and Wesley sobbing miserably on the floor, his leg broken and his ego crushed.

Harry didn't even bother standing up when the announcer went into the middle of the ring to hail his hand out in victory, he just closed his eyes and let Gerry and his crew fuss around him, shouting left to right and demanding that he be sent to the hospital immediately.

He was lifted into a stretcher and rushed out of the arena, the cheers of the crowd still echoing into his ears.

He was loaded to an ambulance that was already waiting outside, Gerry got into the vehicle next to him, nagging Harry non stop about being an idiot and knowing his limits. Harry just closed his eyes and tried blocking him off while the other guy in the ambulance tried to clean his wounds.

Harry must have dozed off for a few minutes because next thing he knew he was being unloaded from the stretcher and into a waiting bed where he can see nurses bustling around him, excited to touch the famous Harry Styles even though Harry had been into the hospital hundred of times to treat his injuries.

"Get away, get away, let me handle him." He heard someone say after ushering the overly excited nurse from treating Harry.

Harry breathed out a sigh of relief when he saw his friend Nick kick the nurses out.

"Hey Nick." Harry greeted him with a small smile.

It seems smiling wasn't a good thing because Nick just made a face when he got a proper look on Harry.

"Bloody hell Styles, you look like shit." Nick said before going over taking  warm wet towel and wiping the blood off.

"Thanks, I feel like one too." Harry chuckled lightly, wincing when Nick started checking the cut on his head.

They hurt like hell.

"Let's get you stitched you sadistic fuck." Nick muttered.

"I'm sleepy." Harry blinked, he was dying to just sleep and wake up in three days maybe.

"Best not to sleep Harry, you might have a concussion." Nick ordered, still rummaging around to find the proper equipment.

"I'm fine."

"Your cut is nasty, I might need a doctor to check it out first for internal bleeding." Nick sighed before going over to the door and pulling a nurse walking by.

"Hey Meg, can you page the new resident doctor, I might need some help with Harry." Nick ordered to a wide eyed Meg.

"Sure thing Nick." Meg nodded and ran off immediately.

Nick knew that Harry was proper famous in the hospital, all the nurses are wrapped under his finger and he could get anything he wanted by just giving those nurses or few doctor a smile and once upon a time Nick was one of them but he and Harry got closer so the charm has worn off.

"Now let's get you changed into your hospital shrubs." Nick said while helping Harry sit up a little so he can remove his shorts, Harry was already half naked after finishing a fight so he wasn't really wearing much.

"You just want to see me naked." Harry mumbled before letting Nick do all the work because he was just so exhausted.

"I've lost interest in trying to sleep with you dear Harold." Nick stated flatly.

"You wouldn't pass the chance." Harry said before sighing in content after being free of that damn constricting material.

"I got my eye on the new resident doctor. He's damn cute Harold, I'm trying to get into his pants but he's super feisty and professional and so hard to get." Nick said sounding much too enthusiastic than necessary.

"He sounds nice, what's his name?" Harry asked, not really caring but letting Nick talk to distract himself.

"His name is-" Nick was immediately cut off by someone talking while still outside of the door.

They both look up to see who it was.

"You called for me Nick, I was kind of bu-"

Harry felt like his mind was making things up and the crack on his head might have caused an involuntary illusion.

Because standing not that far away from him is Louis, his Louis who was also frozen on his spot while staring at Harry.

"Oh, you're here Louis. Glad you can grace us with your presence but my friend here has a nasty cut on his head and might need your expertise." Nick explained, excited to see the doctor after he had been openly ignoring him outside of work.

Louis blinked a few times before he actually got a good grip of himself and he was walking closer to where Harry was sitting who was still staring at Louis wide eyed, scared to touch if it was real because might vanish from thin air.

"Right, okay. Let me see first." Louis said as he put his glasses on and inspected the wound.

Harry couldn't utter nor breath because Louis was touching his head, he was real.

"Earth to Harry? Has the concussion got into you?" Nick asked worryingly after Harry had froze.

"Louis." Was the only thing Harry can say.

"Yes Harold, this is Doctor Louis Tomlinson, Louis, this is Harry Styles, he's the famous MMA fighter." Nick introduced them both.

"Hello Mr. Styles." Louis nodded at him coldly.

Harry's heart broke a little at Louis calling him Mr. Styles and not Harry.

"Louis." Harry wanted to cry right now.

"Oh dear, I think Harry hit his head pretty Hard." Nick commented after examining the stricken look on his friend.

"Hi, Mr. Styles, I need you to look straight into my eyes." Louis ordered calmly while Harry felt like his heart was about to burst.

Looking at Louis' eyes and getting to properly stare at the littlest changes around his face made Harry want to cry, reach out to Louis and hug him.

"He looks okay, a bit glassy eyed so maybe he does have a bit of a concussion. I need you to get him some water and let me do the stitch for his wounds." Louis told Nick after checking both Harry's eyes who were really glassy because Harry couldn't stop the unshed tears on his eyes.

"Alright, I'll be back soon." Nick nodded and gave Harry a small smile before leaving Harry and Louis alone in the room.

"Lou-" Harry had a lengthy explanation and questions in mind for Louis but he wasn't able to finish saying his name because Louis had given him a cold, spine chilling look, his lips set into a thin line as if he was holding himself back from saying something unprofessional to Harry.

"I think it's best if you don't speak for now Harry, I will be administering your stitches so kindly keep still and don't make any sudden movement." He stated before busying himself with stitching up the wound on Harry.

Harry merely agreed and tried so hard not to lift his gaze and look over Louis because he missed that face, Louis had looked so much older, more mature even if it was almost 7 years since he'd last seen him.

He still looked beautiful though.

"There, all done, I'm going to let Nick clean you up and he will be checking up on you once in a while for the concussion but you can rest if you want to." Louis explained to him, his tone clipped, sounding too professional on Harry's own ears.

"I'm sorry." Harry whispered faintly, wanting to spill everything that he was feeling right at this moment, his heart aching for Louis to look at him and smile at him. For Louis to talk to him, punch him, hurt him, anything that would erase the cold look that he had been giving Harry since he saw him.

"Goodbye Mr. Styles, have a good rest." Was Louis only reply to him before turning around and walking out of the door.

Louis left without another glance and Harry was left alone on his room. He might have won that match and another title but it felt like he had lost something much more valuable.


Harry felt restless while he constantly stared at the door, hoping for Louis to return and look at him, really look at him without that cold deadly look as if Harry meant nothing to him.

Harry knew he fucked up real bad but he hoped Louis had forgiven him, after all this years that passed, surely Louis had moved on.

But who was Harry kidding, he was the only one to be blamed of them falling apart.

Harry was proper miserable though and he knew he has never been properly Harry in all of the years that have passed but seeing Louis again, no matter how painful it was a like a breath of fresh air.

He was so fucking happy that Louis got to pursue what he dreamed long ago, to be a doctor. He was afraid that after what he had done to him that Louis might pick a profession that he wouldn't like and be stuck with it for years but now here he was, a fucking doctor and Harry had to ask one of his assistants to buy him a damn phone so he can finally google Louis and learn about his life.

Sean, his assistant, bought him an iphone which Harry did not know how to use so he had to let him teach him the basics first before he left him and let Harry fumble with his new mobile.

Sean had let him install facebook and said that his PR team had already created an account for him years ago because they needed him to be active in social media, turns out Harry also had a twitter and an instagram account with a lot of followers too.

He didn't even have the time to be angry and voice out the importance of identity theft because he just wanted to search every possible media platform to find anything remotely related to Louis.

So he googled him and there were numerous article with a rising doctor named Louis Tomlinson and Harry just couldn't stop the tears from falling when he read all of them.

Louis was a fucking great doctor it turns out.

He was able to skip years in medical school because he excelled so much and had been a great contributor on the development of cheaper of vaccines for Malaria which was world breaking.

There were a lot of medical mumbo jumbo that Harry couldn't understand but he knew Louis was being praised for it.

But there was one article that caught Harry's eye, Louis was asked by multiple big time hospitals for his residency but he declined and chose a much simpler setting to practice.

Harry was flabbergasted because that a huge opportunity and why would Louis decide to waste his big fat brain in this flimsy hospital, he could be on the way of discovering the cure for cancer but he ended up stitching half beaten MMA fighters like Harry.

Why did Louis do it?

"Knock Knock." Someone spoke from the other side of the door and Harry had to put the phone down, hoping for the person to be Louis.

Harry frowned when he found out that it was only Nick.

"Don't look so happy to see me." Nick laughed before wheeling in Harry's breakfast.

It was morning already?

"Judging by the heavy bags under your eyes, you didn't even tried to sleep." Nick noted disapprovingly

"Wasn't sleepy." Harry sighed.

"Well you should try because you need it." Nick stated unhappily.

"When did Lou- I mean Dr. Tomlinson came into this hospital?" Harry bit his lip and asked.

He knew that Louis wasn't his business anymore but he couldn't help it, habits die hard.

"About a month ago I think." Nick answered him.

"Do you know anything about him?" Harry asked again.

Nick had stared at him, confused and surprised at the sudden interrogation.

"Why do you ask?" Nick questioned, eyeing Harry.

"I'm just curious." Harry shrugged half heartedly.

He knew he shouldn't prod around Louis like that, it sounded creepy.

"You can't get into his pants Harry, trust me I tried so hard and the guy wouldn't even bat an eye into my direction." Nick explained to him while putting the table underneath Harry and his food.

Harry balled his fist in annoyance, he didn't particularly like how Nick keep mentioning about sleeping with Louis. If Nick wasn't his friend, he could have punched him already.

"Stop speaking to him like he's some kind of new conquest Nick." Harry grumbled under his breath.

"Woah, what has gotten into you? You've been acting so strange since yesterday." Nick said in surprise.

"Nevermind." Harry huffed and just started playing around with the food on his lap.

Nick was still eyeing him curiously but he sighed and started speaking, taking a seat on an empty plastic chair.

"Well since you did ask, I only know that Louis was some kind of prodigy or something and the hospital has been kissing his ass because he chose his residency here and not on those multi billion dollar hospitals in the country." Was his lengthy reply.

So the articles were true.

"Do you know why?"

"Not a clue, even I don't fully understand." Nick shrugged and proceeded to type away on his phone, waiting for Harry to finish eating.

Harry didn't really feel like eating anymore, the only thing running around his mind was Louis.




Chapter Text

If you would ask Harry about what was going on in his mind, then you'd only get a blank confused stare because even he doesn't know what his plan really was to begin with.

He can blame his recklessness and his ability to do anything his mind can come up with without thinking about the consequences that he might face after it, nope, Harry will not think about the outcome of all his stupid decisions, all the most bizarre thing he did in his life never came close to what he was doing at the moment and that's saying something because he had absolutely done almost every stupid thing imaginable.

"Again? Seriously what the fuck Styles?" Grimshaw angrily hissed before immediately wheeling Harry to the ER.

There was a buzz of several onlookers who might have recognized him but some nurses who already knew who he was had ushered them all away knowing that their head nurse which was Nick might bite their heads off if the media got a hold of this news.

They already have enough blood hungry paparazzi camping out on the bushes and they do not need any more drama after the last one.

Harry couldn't anything more but shrug because really, even he wasn't sure.

"This is the fifth time this month Harry, what is going on with you?" Nick fumed as he tried inspecting the wound closely.

Harry knew that if a higher authority has heard Nick cursing a patient then he'll get in so much trouble but everyone in the hospital knew how extra the nurse was and they adore him, so they leave him be which was unfortunate for Harry because he'll be getting an earful.

Harry was immediately brought to the hospital while he was on training after a rather nasty fall on the treadmill that took him flying to the equipment stand and made him cut his forearm. To be honest, the four incidents, Harry was aware of his actions and he knew deep inside that he did those purposely like avoid a rather lethal kick from Adam or the headbutt that Chris gave him but this time, he knew it was an accident but he can't help but feel excited about the prospect of seeing Louis again so yeah, some might say that Harry has been rather clumsy this month.

"I slipped." Harry muttered as he starts looking impatiently at the door, wondering when Louis would arrive to fix him up like he did on all the other incidents that Harry was taken here.

In all the times that he frequented the ER, Louis was always there. Nick had mentioned to him when they were once out that he was assigned on the trauma center with the cute new doctor aka Louis. Harry tried not to seem too affected when Nick told him about the times he tried to ask Louis out but he was just not having it so that was time Harry devised a rather stupid plan in order to see brunette doctor more frequently.

"You slipped? Really? You're getting close to being Frankenstein with all the stitches." Nick grumbled as he poured some antiseptic on the wound, ignoring Harry's hissed of pain.

Harry should really consider suing him, friend or not that is.

"But I'm not because this hospital makes sure I still look pretty after every stitch." Harry stated after the initial burn from Nick's treatment had subsided.

Harry admits that he sometimes get the high from getting tattoos, the pain was almost nonexistence and with his line of work, getting stiches were a breeze but there was something about the pain that gets him excited and now that he gets to stare at Louis while he does it is an added bonus.


"This hospital meaning Doctor Tomlinson." Nick rolled his eyes at his idiotic friend.

There was time that Nick actually thought he knew Harry so well, but it seems there were still a lot of skeletons hidden on his closet that he wasn't willing to share...well, maybe not just yet.

"He's handiwork is amazing, barely able to see a scar." Harry told him proudly, trying to show the other wounds which were healing rather great.

Harry was proud of what Louis had become and achieved that it makes him think that doing what he did before was the right thing even if it ended up hurting them both in the end...

He suddenly felt a sudden ache in his body which he knew was the same ache he had been feeling for a long time.

"Well tough luck because you'll be getting Doctor Peazer today since Doctor Tomlinson is on leave." Nick told him before sending a smirk to Harry as he finished cleaning up his wound.

"What?!" Harry exclaimed in surprise as he stood up from the bed.

Nick stared at him impatiently because he is not in the greatest of mood to handle his friend's little crisis.

"Sit your ass down, I paged Danielle and she'll be here in a few." Nick pushed him back to the bed as he placed all the medical equipment back to the kit.

"But where's Lou- I mean Doctor Tomlinson." Harry quickly corrected himself.

Harry knew very well that Nick was ticking time bomb right now but he just can't help but feel frustrated because he can't just have this wound for nothing?

"I don't know." Nick told before letting out a tired sigh when his beeper started ringing crazily. "I'm not his secretary." He snapped at Harry, a 48-hour shift and seeing Harry at the hospital again was not a good combination for him.

Harry was about to complain about treating him like a patient when a girl wearing a shrub entered the room.

"You paged Grimshaw?" she asked as she walked closer to their spot.

There was a hint of recognition on her face upon seeing Harry, but she kept her composure well enough.

"Harry Styles, 28, huge laceration on his forearm, bleeding has been controlled but will require some stitches." Nick explained to his colleague.

Harry smiled at the doctor, but he didn't have the strength or much enthusiasm to greet her, Louis was not here and that had put quite a damper on his good mood earlier.

"Alright, let me take a look for any infection." Dr. Peazer, as what Harry remembered vaguely said as she took his arm to inspect it closely.

"How are you doing Mr. Styles." She asked conversationally.

"I'm great." Harry tried to seem civil and friendly enough, but he knew how he obvious his failure to sound more interested in the conversation.

Although Louis refused to talk to him unless it's related to treating him, Harry was okay just staring at him.

Harry has turned into a creepy stalker and each day he wakes up wondering if he'll get some mail one day containing a restraining order.

He hopes it wasn't the case.

"I'll leave him to you, watch him, can you?" Nick told her ah he gave a sideway glance at Harry.

Harry did not take that very well because Nick was making him look like an uncoordinated 7 year old.

"I'm not a child." Harry bristled in embarrassment.

"If you frequent the ER so much then maybe I'll treat you as one." Nick scoffed at him before leaving him there, pouting rather childishly.

Harry is so suing his ass once this is done and then he'll invite him for dinner because he's quite fancying some Italian cuisine after this whole ordeal.

"Alright, why don't we start shall we?" Dr. Peazer told him cheerfully.

Harry gave her a small smile but didn't add up much into the conversation.

"I'm not as good as Doctor Tomlinson but I'll make sure to not make it worse." She added as she started on her sutures.

"Is it too obvious?" Harry sighed dramatically.

Who was Harry lying too, maybe almost all the staff in this hospital are buzzing with questions on why the famous MMA Fighter, Harry Styles is being admitted in the hospital rather frequently.

"That someone of your occupation would be too clumsy to get themselves injured?" She asked with an obvious raised eyebrow.

"I'm an idiot." Harry groaned, not because of the pain by being pierced by a needle but by his own stupid idiotic actions that may end up catastrophic if Louis really decided to get him a restraining order.

"I may not know the whole thing, but I feel like there's more to the story you know? You don't get yourself injured for someone you just met just so you can see them more often?" She told him with a small encouraging smile.

"He doesn't want to see me." He explained to her, he was already stuck in the situations so might as well ask for some advice coming from other people who doesn't know the whole picture.

But let's be honest, what Harry did was something even a stranger would turn against him but Dr. Edwards doesn't look like that judgmental.

"Have you talked to him?" she asked while still continuing her work on his wound.

"Not really." Harry confessed.

Harry has the courage to face an opponent in the ring who is literally twice his size but the idea of asking Louis if they can talk without Harry being injured makes his heart go into arrest.

Those blue eyes can hold so much hate.

"Then how would you know that he doesn't want to talk to you."

Harry doesn't know what to say in return because anyone in a 500-mile radius can see that Louis does not want anything to do with him, not now or ever.

Harry was starting to think that the reason Louis was out of work today was to avoid him completely.

Dr. Peazer must have noticed how Harry was deep in thought, so she just focused on fixing him up.

"There, all finish. It doesn't look that bad, doesn't it?" she asked and gestured on her handiwork.

"It doesn't." Harry smiled at her because it was true, it wasn't the level of Louis' flawless stiches, but it was nearing second. Who was Harry kidding, he dropped out of high school so what does he know about perfect stiches.

"Thank you." Harry added when Dr. Peazer started packing her stuffs.

"You're welcome Mr. Styles, I'll let grimmy know that you're done." She smiled before waving at him goodbye, leaving Harry miserable and on his own. He needed to figure out his shit because he doesn't have any skin left to injure, his coach will kill him once he found out what he is doing with his body.

Tattoos were one thing to worry about when you start littering your body but cut and wounds were another thing.

Harry is the very definition of fucked up.


He was discharged after Nick had gone into a full 30-minute rant about admitting him into the psych ward if he comes back even for a small thing such as a cold.

Harry merely rolled his eyes at his friend's dramatics but knew he should really just stop.

Louis might really start thinking that something was wrong with Harry. He wasn't particularly fond with the idea of seeing Louis every day because he was considered as a crazy person or a danger to himself.

Harry pondered on what Dr. Edwards had suggested about actually growing some actual balls and just talk to Louis without having to injure himself or make pathetic excuses to see the doctor.

Harry went back to his car to go to a place where he knew he'll be able to figure out a way or get an idea on how to approach Louis without a restraining order being filed.

The bandage was a bit troublesome, but he handled it easily as he drove to his destination.

The place was just a few miles away from the hospital, Harry listened to a few songs that came up on the radio and instantly perked up when the place came into view.

The place Harry was excited to visit today was the Wandering Sparrow, it was an orphanage open for teenagers who had lost their parents or who were kicked out from their house due to reasons like physical and sexual abuse or instances like coming out of their parents.

Harry knew how difficult it was for an orphaned teenager to get adopted so when he started earning more money from his fights, he tried creating anonymous charity events to get help and make it publicly known how difficult it was to be an abandoned teen.

He wanted it to be anonymous because he knew he doesn't deserve the praise, so he let his friends Jade and Lucas do all the public events while he secretly funds the cause and help.

It was one of the things that helped Harry endure the years.

Harry parked his car to the reserved parking lot the management had given him, it was efficient since everyone knows how much he drops by. He jumped out of his car and sneakily went to the back-door entrance.

Harry instantly brightened when his eyes landed on a familiar figure.

"Jade!" Harry shouted before running towards her and lifting her up with his uninjured arm.

"Holy shit!" Jade shrieked before laughing after realizing it was just Harry who was man handling him.

"What the hell! Warn a girl Styles." She was supposed to hit him but froze when her eyes landed on the bandaged-up arm.

"What the hell happened to your arm?" she shrieked making a few heads turned into their direction.

Harry quickly shushed her and pulled her away from the prying eyes of people, they ended up hiding in Jade's office which was still unorderly as Harry had seen a few days ago. There were a lot of stacks of files piled up on her desk and a few stained cups of tea and coffee.

Harry sometimes feel bad at having to give her the job, but Jade always insists that this was her dream as she was also an orphaned teen before. Harry had met her when he was still starting out as a fighter and they became instant friends and she had helped Harry ever since he drunkenly told her about his dream of building an orphanage house for teens.

The memory still makes Harry laugh.

"Slipped on a treadmill." Harry told her.

"You idiot!" Jade blurted which made Harry roll his eyes.

"What's going on here?" Harry asked her after noticing that there were suddenly more unfamiliar faces walking around.

"There's a medical mission going on, the kids are getting checked out after a sudden outbreak of flu at a nearby town." Jade explained to her.

"Are they all okay? Do you guys need any more donation." Harry quickly asked in concern.

"You don't have to, we still have enough donations for now and the medical checkup were given for free, it was voluntary." Jade happily told him.

"Just tell me when you need it, I'm not lacking." Harry explained, still with a worried frown on his face.

"Of course you're not lacking Mr. Big Shot." Jade joked to her while she happily sorted out her mountain of files.

"Is Lucas here?" Harry asked after carefully picking up the empty cups on the floor and putting them on a semi vacant table.

"He's talking to the organizer right now, you can pop right in and say hello." Jade told her cheerfully.

She was pretty ecstatic about the activities going on because she always wanted to get some doctor to get the kids checked out and her prayers were answered.

"Alright, thanks Jade." Harry told her before waving goodbye and leaving her office.

He walked to Lucas' office so he can say hello before he goes and check how the medical mission was going, he wanted to personally thank whoever organized this volunteering event, he should have thought about this earlier but his mind was too consumed with thoughts of Louis.

Harry happily skipped and opened the door, forgetting all his manners of knocking and greeted his friend.

The door was suddenly opened, and someone came out which made Harry collide. Harry instantly reacted and wrapped his arms around the person when he felt that they were going to fall due to the impact.

"I'm sorry but are you ok- Louis?" Harry asked I surprise after he recognized Louis who he is currently hugging right now and looks just as startled.

They both snapped out of their sudden trance and Louis was the first to put some space between them.

"Seriously Harry? Are you seriously stalking me!" Louis angrily shouted when he finally recovered from the shock of seeing Harry again.

"What?" Harry asked, his mind was a little bit muddled because he was surely not expecting to see Louis here at all.

"First the hospital and now while I'm out of work?" Louis was fuming but Harry was unable to defend himself because holy shit Louis was really standing in front of him.

The person Harry was supposed to be actually visiting appeared next to Louis and he seemed to be delighted at seeing him as well.

"Oh Harry! I wasn't expecting you today." Lucas greeted cheerfully.

"Uh-" Harry felt like his tongue was caught that he was left as an incoherent mess of words.

Lucas however was oblivious as he went to give Harry a friendly hug not noticing the suddenly panicked looked on Louis' face.

"This is Mr. Harry Styles, he's one of the founder of this orphanage, he's a real angel. He's always dropping by to see the kids and helps out volunteering too." Lucas stated like a proud father as he continuously pats Harry's back.

"Oh." Was the only thing Louis was able to reply, his face a little pained but still trying to seem professional by flashing a fake smile.

"Harry, this is Dr. Louis Tomlinson, he's the doctor who organized this medical mission for the kids and volunteered to be the orphanage doctor, isn't that great!" Lucas introduced Louis next.

"Oh." Was the exact same thing Harry was able to say because he was so lost for words.

What the hell was going on.

"I can't help but feel so happy to be in the same room as such kind-hearted fellows, you lads will change the future of this kids." Lucas said tearfully, still fucking oblivious at the large tension suddenly filling the room and choking Harry to his death.

Who would have thought that he didn't have to device any more stupid accidents to see Louis because he was already here, and it looked like he was going to see him more often and Louis doesn't particularly looked fond of the idea.



Chapter Text



Harry knows that he was in hot water with Louis, to the point where the water is boiling and when Harry starts to get close enough then he'll get burned, skin turning black and into crisp.

That is how it makes him feel.

Usually, he enjoys coming to the orphanage to visit and get to know the kids but now after he must be more careful with his visits because he doesn't want to drive Louis away.

Louis volunteered for the kids and it would suck if he would leave just because he can't stand Harry but today was a different day, Harry actually has a scheduled activity with the kids, so he can't be late.

He went downstairs to get ready and start on breakfast. He wasn't in the best of moods to eat anything heavy, so he settled with a plain cereal and some milk.

He stared at his bowl of cereal solemnly but ate it anyway. Are this what people who pines at other people for so long eats? Or was it just him?

He was checking his emails while simultaneously wondering what Louis was eating today.

Louis did change a lot, far from the small feminine built that Harry knew about in high school. He wasn't going to act all innocent and lie about how he just wanted to dominate Louis and make that innocent face go crazy with pleasure before.

But now, Louis looked more rugged. He seemed to have started growing a beard and it made him look so attractive that Harry sometimes wanted to bang his head on the wall.

Louis had also grown some muscles and Harry wondered if he frequented the gym but knowing Louis all those years meant that the man wouldn't dream of it. He would only visit the gym to watch Harry but not do any physical activities with him.

He might not look like the same naïve boy from high school, but Harry had a lot in mind on what to with him now that they both have grown.

Harry knew it wasn't the wisest idea to start thinking about Louis early in the morning because there will be consequences.

"Yep, that's a boner." Harry muttered to himself.

He brought his dirtied plates to the sink and washed it before drying it out on the rack.

He quickly went to the bathroom to handle the 'consequences' and swore that he wasn't thinking about Louis.

After a quick shower, Harry quickly went to get ready because he knew he was already late.

He dashed out of his house and went to his car to get to the orphanage in time.

Harry quickly shook his head to erase anything that resembles a dirty though once he parked his car. He needed to have a clear head if he's going to face the kids, he really should have a tight grip with himself because this was beyond crazy.

He should have accepted long before that there might not be another chance with they way Louis have acted around him. There might still be this tiny bit of hope in the back of his mind, but it wasn't good enough to erase all the things he did to him.

It never fails to bring a dark cloud over his head.

The thought of Louis never forgiving him.

"Harry!" Someone shouted to catch his attention and he turned his head to the direction of the voice only to see Jade crazily waving at him to come over quickly.

He plastered a smile and jogged towards her.

"Hi Jade." He greeted before giving her a quick hug.

Jade hugged him back and immediately punching his shoulder playfully after they pull away from each other. It didn't really hurt much but it surprised him.

"You're late, the kids have been waiting for you." She said unapprovingly.

"I'm sorry, got held up at home." Harry apologized, scratching his head and avoiding eye contact because he knew exactly what held him up at home.

"Course you are." Jade snorted before pushing Harry to the room where 10 kids and teens were waiting for him. "Now get your ass in there before they get bored and start sneaking out again." She added before pushing him more, breathing a little hard because she knows how Harry was teasing her by making it more difficult for her to push him.

"What are you saying? Jake is an angel." Harry mentioned with a laugh.

He knows how much a trouble maker Jake was and how Jade adored the kid but he's driving her nuts with all his schemes.

Jade just huffed and shook her head before slapping Harry's back and walking away.

Harry chuckled before finally entering the room and flashing a bright smile to everyone in the room who looked bored out of their mind.

"Hello everyone!" He greeted a little too enthusiastically making a few unsuspecting kids jump in surprise.

"Harry!" they shouted and immediately stopped what they were initially doing to greet him back.

A few kids who were already too close to Harry came to him and hugged him while others stayed back and waved at him in greeting.

"Did you guys wait long?" Harry asked after the hugs have subsided.

"Ms. Thirlwall bribed as snacks if we waited for you for a few more minutes." Amy told him where she stood at the front, always wanting to be at front so she can lead other kids to follow her moves while she copies Harry's.

"I can't believe you guys needed to be bribed to wait for me, you should wait for me for free because I'm awesome." Harry sighed in disappointment as he started checking if all the safety mats were already in place before he starts his class.

"Eh that's debatable Mr. Styles." Rosa chimed from the back which made a few of the kids laugh.

"You all wound me." Harry pouted before going back in the front to see if anyone was missing in class.

He started the self defense and martial art class at the orphanage to help some kids struggling with their body and letting out a few aggression and energy to good use. Some of these kids came from an abusive family and he knew how much physical abuse can damage the wellbeing of a child.

He learned it from experience.

He was just lucky to have met Louis who introduced him to boxing, he always wondered what could have happened to him if he wasn't able to divert his aggression to the sport.

He was doing anything he can for the sake of the kids.

"Alright, how about we start with some nice long stretches, you wouldn't want to stay in bed forever like a certain someone I know." Harry

"Heeey, that was one-time Harry." Jake whined from his spot as the kids who already knew the story laughed at him, others were just staring at the blushing boy curiously.

"I'm not saying it was you Jake, but I appreciate you pointing it out for everyone." Harry chuckled before plugging his phone to the speaker and playing an upbeat song, so they wouldn't get bored easily flailing their limbs carelessly.

"Alright everyone in position and just repeat what I do alright?" Harry told them and they all replied with a 'Yes' in unison.


Harry watched in rapt attention as the kids tried a relatively pose. He can see that some of them already gave up and was lying face first on the floor.

He knew that it would happen, so he clapped his hands to get most of their attentions.

"Alright, let's have a few minutes break and then I'll teach you the right way to defend yourself if you are ever under attacked." Harry told them with a smile.

They all chorused with an excited 'Yes' before running to the table which was set up with foods that Harry made Jade to order.

"So how's everyone?" Jade asked while the kids settled in on the floor to eat, they supervised them to make sure they didn't make a mess on the training mats.

"The perfect angels of course." Harry answered her just as Amy started calling their attention when Jake stole her chicken.

Harry was quick to give her another piece and told Jake to just go and eat with Charles.

"You sure spoil them a lot Harry." Jade commented when Harry returned to their place.

"They all deserve to be spoiled once in a while especially with the life they had." Harry explained to him with a small smile.

"You're right." Jade nodded in understanding.

"I wanted to know more about her, she seemed a little distant with the other kids." Harry told her as he pointed at the little girl sitting at the far end of the room.

Harry knew better than to force her to cooperate during the stretching, so he let her sit that one out and just watch the other kids.

"Her name is Elizabeth, she only got in last week and refused to speak to anyone even to the counselors." Jade explained to him.

"But she's been checked and she's fine?" Harry asked her worriedly.

"Yeah, the hospital released her after treating her and the police suggested she stay here for now while her dad was on trial."

"I'll go talk to her."

"Okay but be careful Harry, we don't want to spook her too much." Jade told him, concern lacing het voice.

"Alright." Harry nodded and slowly approached her.

She noticed him immediately and cowered on the floor, hiding her face between her knees.

Harry noticed how she was shaking slightly so he decided to sit a few feet away from her.

"Hi." Harry greeted her softly as to not make her panic more.

She didn't lift her head to acknowledge him, but Harry understood.

He must have looked intimidating to her.

"Don't worry I'm not here to disturb you, I just thought you need some company." Harry told her as he settled on the floor, leaning back on the wall and continuing to watch the other kids talk to each other while enjoying their snacks.

"My name is Harry, I don't work here but I like hanging out and helping out with everything." He introduced himself.

"I teach them some basic self-defense, so they can have an outlet for their aggression, most of them were physically abused." Harry muttered still staring the kids, this young people who already had it rough at a young age.

"L-like me?" a small voice suddenly spoke, Harry almost didn't ear it but as he turned his face towards her, he was surprised and happy to see that she finally stopped hiding from him.

She was still shaking slightly but there was a new look on her face instead of the initial fear.

"There are a lot of evil people in the world, but you must not forget that there are still kind ones and people who will do everything they can to help you." Harry reminded her as he offered her the plate Jade prepared for her.

She still hasn't eaten because she was scared to get food.

She looked at the plate of food hesitantly before slowly crawling towards him and shyly reaching for the offered food.

"You don't have to worry about being hurt here because I will do everything I can to protect you here, I have a trophy to prove it." Harry told her as he watched her take slow bites of the chicken.

"Don't let my dad in here please." She pleaded as she stared at him tearfully.

"He will never lay another finger on you okay?" Harry promised to her and smiled when she nodded and took another bite.


Harry splashed some water out of his face and breathed out a long-suffering breath.

His hands were aching to hit something, how can someone hurt their own daughter, their own flesh and blood.

Elizabeth has post traumatic stress disorder and flinches whenever someone comes close to her. She doesn't seem to trust any of the kids and cries whenever any of the orphanage staff tries to get her for a quick check up.

Harry was really getting furious and just a few minutes away from storming to the prison where her dad was being held and just punching the living daylights out of him.

He glanced at his reflection on the mirror and jumped in surprise when his eyes landed on a familiar face staring right back at him.

"Well this is awkward." Zayn spoke from where he was leaning on the wall.

The very man himself which Harry couldn't possibly forget, those cheekbones will leave a mark to anyone who knows him.

"Zayn!" Harry shouted in surprised before quickly running towards him but stopped when Zayn raised his hands.

"Harry." Zayn nodded at him.

"Are we not allowed to hug right now?" Harry asked in disbelief.

The surprise upon seeing another close friend threw him off that he almost forgot that he was a right asshole to them, leaving them and not contacting for years end.

"People might get the wrong idea and think that we're friends." Zayn told him seriously.

Harry nodded in understanding but he felt his chest tightening when Zayn actually verbalized what he was thinking.

"Oh." He mumbled in embarrassment, not knowing what to do next.

Zayn watched him for a few seconds before he started cracking up.

"I'm kidding you idiot." He laughed and opened his arms, motioning for a hug from him.

Harry stared at him with wide unbelieving eyes before he threw himself at him, hugging him tightly.

"Shit I can't believe I'm seeing you." Harry muttered before patting his back, Zayn reciprocated the action wholeheartedly.

"Me neither but I had a hunch I might cross paths with you." He told him once they parted.

"What do you mean?" Harry asked in confusion.

"Louis mentioned doing a volunteer work at an orphanage, he was excited but just saw him last week and then he doesn't want to talk about it. I figured there might be someone involved." Zayn explained to him.

"How in the fuck can you still do that?" Harry exclaimed disbelievingly.

Memories from how Zayn always knew what was happening before Harry even knew it was happening came flooding into him.

"I wasn't 100% sure that it was you Harry, but I research the orphanage and there a few articles mentioning that it was being funded by a famous MMA Fighter." Zayn told him with a small smile.

"Are you a detective now?" Harry questioned him excitedly.

He once suggested to Zayn that he would make one hell of a good detective. The way he analyzes and figure out things so fast sometimes creeps Harry out and he knew what field was best for him.

"You aren't wrong on that." Zayn answered him with a smirk begore pulling out his wallet and showing his badge to Harry.

"Holy shit you are?" Harry gasped in astonishment.

He quickly took Zayn's wallet and skimmed through the details but froze when his eyes read the printed last name on the ID.

"Detective Zayn Malik-Payne." Harry read, and his eyes automatically landed on Zayn's left which adorns a silver metal band.

"You're married! To Liam??!" Harry closed his eyes and felt like hitting something out of frustration. He turned his back to Zayn to stare at the mirror instead. "Fuck" He groaned.

"Hey, are you okay?" Zayn asked in confusion, worried about the sudden change in Harry.

"Shit, you guys are married and I-"Harry trailed off and stopped because it was just too much.

Sometimes he forgets how much years have passed and how a lot of important events can occur through those years.

It wasn't hard to figure out that Zayn and Liam will end up together, Harry sometimes envied on how comfortable they both are to each other. They were the very definition of soul mates that people often wished to experience but are unlucky to have.

"You had your reason." Zayn told him with a soft pat on his back to try and calm him down.

"You knew?" Harry asked in bewilderment as he quickly turn around to face Zayn who had a knowing look on his face.

"I just knew you wouldn't leave Louis like that." Was Zayn's only answer.

"And you didn't tell him?" Harry questioned him, perplexed because if anyone would ask who Zayn was loyal to, it was to Louis.

They were far closer than Harry is to him and knowing that Zayn kept something from his friend was big news.

"I wanted to but it's not my story to tell Harry." Was Zayn's explanation.

"And Liam? How about Niall? Is he okay?" Harry threw a series of questions.

He was both curious and uninformed about what could have happened to his other friends, he felt a little guilty because all those years he only wondered about how Louis was doing.

He didn't think about the other people he might left behind.

He really was selfish in other people perspective, hence where the hatred from Louis was coming from.

"I'm the only one who knew, Liam knows that I know something, but he didn't force me to tell him." Zayn replied with a small shrug.

Harry nodded in understanding.

"Do you plan on telling him though? It's been so long Harry." Zayn asked when Harry decided to keep quiet.

"The guy loathes me, I feel like it will only make things worse." Harry chuckled without humor.

Louis does all the necessary precaution to not bump into or be in the same room as Harry.

"He deserved to know the truth though." Zayn told him.

Zayn was right just as any other people have said to him before, the only answer to their age old dilemma was to just straight up talk to Louis and explain things.

But there was a voice inside Harry's head who kept nagging about how his explanation wasn't enough for Louis to forgive him and maybe that was the real reason he was always trying to delay it.

Before Harry can utter his reply, the door suddenly opened showing none other than Niall Horan himself.

"Hey Zayn you've been in the bathro-" Niall spoke without actually looking as he was staring on his phone but instantly freezes when his eyes landed on Harry upon raising his head.

"Niall!" Harry shouted in glee, but the smile turned upside down when Niall glared at him menacingly.

"Asshole!" Niall shouted before barging inside and aiming his fist directly at Harry.

Harry was too caught in the moment that he didn't even blocked Niall's punch as it landed on his cheek.

"Hey! Calm down Niall!" Zayn quickly stopped Niall when he was readying another punch.

"What is he doing here!?" Niall struggled in Zayn's hold, demanding to be set free so he can beat Harry into a pulp.

"Wow, gotta give it to you Niall, that shit hurts." Harry groaned but felt like he deserved it.

Of course he deserved it, he was ready to receive another blow if Zayn permits.

"What's going on in here?" Another voice asked from the door and they simultaneously looked to see who it was.

"Hi Liam." Harry grinned but flinched when pain flooded his lips.

Niall totally did a good one on him.

"Oh my god, what is Harry doing here?" Liam whisper shouted as he watched as Zayn stopped an annoyed Niall from kicking Harry who was holding his cheek which was starting to bruise.

"You could have told me they were also here." Harry turned to Zayn to scold him.

He was delighted to see his friends but hopefully in a more decent place and not the orphanage restroom.

"Nah, I still feel like you deserved the punch mate." Zayn chuckled but didn't let Niall near Harry anymore.

"What the hell is going on Zayn! What is he doing here?" Niall demanded breathing hard.

"Calm down guys, he's not here because of Louis." Zayn sighed when Liam still refused to react as he stared at the scene wide eyed and in disbelief and Niall raging next to Zayn while Harry pouted next to the wall.

The air was starting to get thick with tension but was immediately cut by a small unsure voice speaking behind the door that Liam was currently blocking with his frozen state.

"Hello? Is anyone here?" the person asked followed by a knock.

Liam snapped out of his trance and quickly opened the door where a young boy peeked inside.

"Oh Ray, what are you doing here bud?" Harry said before going over and helping Ray as he was using crutches.

Harry tried to look if he was being monitored by a counselor, but he was all alone. He needs to have a word with whomever was assigned to monitor the kids with disabilities, knowing they couldn't do much activities on their own.

"I need to use the toilet Mr. Styles." Ray replied to him politely.

Ray knew Mr. Styles because he was nice man who gave him pizza earlier.

"Well let me help you buddy, can you guys wait outside while I help Ray?" Harry asked his friends who were watching his interaction with Ray curiously.

"Come on, we'll wait outside." Zayn ushered his gawking husband and his enraged friend outside.

"But-" Niall was about to but in but Liam helped Zayn from moving him out of the room when Ray cowered next to Harry. Ray gets anxious when people are raising their voices and Liam noticed so placed his palms on Niall's mouth to shut him up.

"Come on now Niall." Liam said before nodding at Harry in understanding.

The three left and Ray stared at Harry curiously.

"Who were they Mr. Styles?" Ray asked once the door was closed shut.

"My best friends." Harry said without hesitation.

"They look angry." Ray commented.

"They are livid." Harry chuckled.

"You're smiling even if they are mad?" Ray asked in confusion.

"I just missed them a lot now come here before your bladder burst." Harry joked before helping him up into an empty cubicle.

It was surely going to be a long day and Harry should be ready to get beat up, but he can't help but feel that something missing inside of him was slowly being found, like a puzzle who can't be solved.

The pieces where right there all along, just misplaced.



Chapter Text



Harry could not recall when the last time he felt giddy like a child.

Moving out from home when he was a teen had force him to mature early. Innocence gone and can't even enjoy the simplest pleasures in life.

Meeting Louis was different, the scrawny nerd who came at his aid to help him when he was hiding at the library still was the first time he didn't feel like punching someone.

Losing Louis started all sort of pent of frustration growing inside of him which made him secluded again, meeting people but forgetting their name the day after.

He was alive but not really living.

But now, at this very moment where he sat in Jade's office with a scowling Niall, a still shocked Liam and a smirking Zayn made Harry feel happy.

The three males were just staring at Harry and Harry was too over his head to start talking.

It was Niall who broke the awkward silence.

"Why do we have to stay in this room? It gives me more reason to strangle this guy." He grumbled.

He had an ice pack placed on his knuckles due to the earlier punch he gave Harry. Harry had an aching jaw but didn't mind it, he was kind of happy with the pain because it makes him believe that it wasn't a dream.

"We can't let the children see you punching people Niall." Liam interjected.

Niall sighed and just plopped at the nearby sofa.

"So, you build this orphanage to look nice?" He inquired in a sarcastic tone which made Harry look away.

"Niall." Zayn called on Niall in a serious tone.

Harry gave Zayn a small smile, he knew that the man wasn't completely on his side, but he knows the truth, maybe part of the truth but having someone know the secret he's been keeping feels like a whole ton of weight has been lifted off his shoulders.

But Harry understood where Niall was coming from.

Niall continued with his rant, looking disbelievingly at Zayn. He didn't know why he was defending Harry of his actions. "Look, I'm just not comfortable being with the person who hurt my friend and suddenly disappeared out of our life like we meant nothing."

"Nia-"Zayn was about to reprimand his friend when Harry lifted his hand to stop him.

Harry shakes his head and let out a sigh. "No, he's right Zayn, you all have the right to hate me."

"Like hell we do." Niall grumbled which earned an eye roll from an exasperated Zayn.

"Can we just listen to what he has to say?" Liam commented to stop the two from bickering, it was giving him an awful headache already.

Harry smiled at Liam, but it wasn't returned so Harry bit his lip and thought about where he should start.

He knows that he should grovel an apology, but it was awkward enough as it is.

Harry has been thinking about this moment where he should explain everything to the smallest detail. They all deserved to know, and Harry was wrong to think that they never meant anything to him because they do.

They were the first people to accept him and not get absolutely shit scared.

He sat up straight and looked at them with so much seriousness he can muster.

"I love Louis and I never stopped." He admitted, eyes pleading for them to believe.

Niall was about to open his mouth to probably say something against it but Liam was to send him a glare.

"Not another word Horan, let him finish."

Everyone in the room knew Liam was too kind and too forgiving so when he's the one who's sending out the glares and the annoyed looks then it means business.

You need to shut up when the nicest person you know is starting to get pissed.

But Harry was truly grateful for the opportunity to explain even if he knew that they weren't obligated to hear him out.

"I know that I've hurt him, and he doesn't deserve it especially from me, but I was hurting too."

It turns out it wasn't the words Niall wanted to hear as he quickly stood up and threw the ice pack on the couch. "That's it, I'm out of here."

Harry should just really get to the point and he did.

"I got tangled up with the wrong people." he rushed to say without looking up from where he was playing with his fingers.

"What?" Niall stopped mid walk and stared at Harry in confusion, the same with Liam who suddenly looked worried as he shared a look with Zayn.

Zayn had zero expression on his face but listened.

The nod that Zayn gave him was his cue to continue. "After I was expelled from school and you guys were finishing finals, I joined another illegal underground fight." He told them.

He felt like a child waiting to be reprimanded.

"What the fuck Harry?"

Niall already made it a point that he shouldn't give a shit about Harry based on how he reacted the first time he saw him, but he was also the first to looked surprised and disappointed with him, an emotion that a person who hated you shouldn't feel.

"I just wanted to save enough money for Louis' graduation gift, I tried really hard to find a part time job, but no one would hire me. I knew it was the only way to earn easy money and I didn't tell you guys because I know you would go against it."

Harry knew he was an idiot back then, there are night where he used to lie awake and think of what could have happened if he just stayed at home or sneaked back in school to be with Louis rather than go into that fight.

Would they have a different story to tell and not as fucked up as it was today?

"People die on those fights Harry of course we would go against it." Liam replied to him with a grim expression.

Harry nodded because he knew of that reality, the danger of fighting in an illegal ring, drunk violent people betting over people to beat each other up and most cases those fight ended with a person dying. Louis had cried to him when he found out that Harry used to go and made him promise to never participate in such a bloody fight.

Harry still felt so guilty at having broken his promise to him and the worst part was he never even knew that he lied.

Harry decided to continue his long and overdue explanation.

"I was fine, the fight was easy, and I won but someone approached me after. Offered me a job to be a pro boxer and I knew that it was shady because the only people who would go into illegal underground fights to recruit are dangerous ones."

It wasn't the first time Harry was approached by someone interested to recruit him, but he was fooled by the offer, the way they boast about the money, the fame and the success.

Harry wanted it because his future is not only his alone now, it's for him and Louis. That's how far ahead he was thinking that it was nearing crazy.

"You accepted the offer." It wasn't a question but a statement from Niall.

Harry nodded before dropping his gaze from the judgement clouding his friends' eyes. "I did, I was a high school dropout. No chances of getting into university or a community college. I didn't want to be unemployed and being pro means, I can make something of myself."

"You didn't even think about consulting to someone about the contract?" Liam muttered in disbelief.

Zayn mentioned it while they were on their way to the office how Liam passed the board exam and how Niall was recently signed as an artist and is in the process of recording an album.

Harry was elated about the news and wanted to hug Niall and Liam in congratulatory but the glare from Niall and the uneasy look on Liam made him not to.

It seems Liam was able to pursue his dream of becoming a lawyer. The disbelief and worry all over his face meant that he had vast knowledge about law binding contracts. Harry always made fun of Liam when they were in school about how a lawyer wouldn't not suit him just like it wouldn't suit Louis. Lawyers are known to be intimidating vultures and between Louis' shy demeanor and Liam's puppy dog eyes, they were far from intimidating.

Niall was a great singer, always belting out a song if the chance is given and Harry gave him the idea of trying out to be a professional singer, but Niall only shrugged it off saying it wasn't an actual job, but Harry begged to differ.

Harry was so proud at what his friends have achieved so far even if he wasn't there to witness such achievements.

"I was so happy about the opportunity that it didn't even cross my mind to read it."

"Was it legally binding?" Liam asked in clarification.

"I was surprised that it was." Harry shrugged which was met by a shake of disapproval from Liam.

Niall looked just as disapproving as Liam, but he has a question nagging on his mind which was still unclear. "How did that even end up from you leaving Louis?" he decided to ask after Harry kept suddenly quiet.

"They said I can't be gay." Harry murmured, a little furious and mad about the particular conversation with that manager.

The disgust lacing his tone when Harry mentioned about having a boyfriend and the threats that came flooding in.

"What!?" Niall shouted in disbelief. "How the fuck can you stop being gay? Do they think that it's a disease that can be cured and then bam you're straight again?"

Harry would have laughed at Niall's overreaction, but he knew he really shouldn't.

It was a rather sensitive topic especially to a sport like boxing where people expect that the people they watch to fight are straight muscled men filled with steroids.

The amount of ridicule and homophobia that a gay boxer usually received is a lot and expect a lot of negative press.

It was the 20th century and people are still homophobic as fuck.

"But did you really break up with Louis so that you can pursue your career? That's pretty selfish." Liam instigated as he crossed his arms in front of his chest.

The statement made Harry rise from his seat in anger.

"Of course not! If I would choose between my life and Louis, I'd choose his." Harry scoffed.

Zayn was quick to stand in front of Liam, staring at Harry in warning, his eyes sending a message to Harry 'To back the fuck off Liam or I will break your hand' look.

Harry groaned and just sat back down at the seat he was previously occupying.

He didn't want any more misunderstanding, so he quickly explained his side of the story.

"Louis got accepted to university, his dad finally let him pursue his medical career and he chose the most prestigious medical school in the country and I was very proud of him." Harry said with a small sad smile.

It was a far memory but the elated feeling of watching your beloved success in life felt like a drug, the happiness was contagious because his achievement felt like his own.

"We were all proud of him." Niall added firmly, recalling the memory as well. They all got drunk that day, even Louis which was his first, so it was pretty memorable for Niall.

Harry suddenly chuckled darkly as he closed his eyes to lean on the chair for support. All the happy memory vanishing replaced by the terrible ones.

"That fucking manager was a complete fucker, I was going to get sued when I refused the contract and I didn't give a shit. I would go to jail instead of breaking up with Louis." He admitted.

The other people in the room didn't react nor speak as they watched Harry get frustrated by merely remembering the past.

"He had connections after connections and he threatened me to not only ruin my life but also Louis'."

Harry turned to Zayn who has been quiet the whole conversation, letting all the information sink into Liam and Niall "You probably know the guy already right Zayn?" he asked.

Zayn had his lip in a flat lie before he nodded and answered. "He was imprisoned last year for drug and human trafficking. That's when I finally uncover the whole reason you suddenly left."

"That's messed up." Niall commented with a frown.

It wasn't just messed up, it was fucked up.

Harry's life started to go downwards, and he couldn't do anything about it, he just kept sinking, drowning and his friends weren't even aware, so they couldn't save him.

"He had people at the university Louis picked to go to and he threatened to ruin Louis' chances of getting in and passing." He turned to Liam. "He was also a shareholder at the firm that Louis' dad was working on and he gave me a detailed story on how it was easy to frame Louis' dad of corruption where he might get sent to prison."

They were quiet once again, watching as Harry tried to pull himself together.

"I didn't want to leave Louis, I really didn't want to hurt him but by staying with him would hurt him more." Harry muttered under his breath.

He closed his eyes at the memory of hurt and confusion in Louis' face when Harry talked to him about breaking up.

"I agreed to what they want just as long as they leave Louis and his family alone. They agreed but only if I lose all contact with him."

For Harry, it was still one of the most painful decision he made. Leaving Louis without an explanation and disposing any means of contact.

He couldn't sleep at night or properly train as his heart felt like it was being ripped to pieces, wondering if Louis was okay. Wondering if Louis was still waiting for him to come back and tell him that it was just a joke.

Everyone was quiet, Niall was sat quiet on the sofa, angrily pressing on the bruise on his knuckles, angry at himself because he let his feelings and anger get the better of him and now Harry has a broken heart and a bruise on his face.

Liam was leaning next to Zayn as he watched their friend try to stop himself from breaking down, he felt sorry that Harry had to go through it alone, the pain he must be feeling is unbearable.

Zayn felt angry at himself as well, he should have acted since the day he found out the connection between Harry's old manager and him leaving quickly but he knew better than to meddle. It was easy to investigate and find the truth behind the problem but acting on it and trying to fix his two friends were never his own to handle.

Harry and Louis need to fix themselves first before they can try to fix their relationship.

"Why didn't you tell me." Came from a voice that no one expected.

The four of the whipped their heads at the door where a livid looking Louis stands wearing his hospital shrubs after his duty at the orphanage.

Harry was sat frozen and wide eyed at Louis.

"Louis!" Niall quickly sat up to go over his friend.

"How long were you standing there?" Liam asked in shock as well, looking between Harry and Louis who seems to be having an epic stare down.

"Can you guys leave us for a minute." Louis muttered without breaking eye contact with Harry.

Zayn nodded in understanding before placing his hands on Liam's back and guiding him out the door.

Zayn stopped next to Niall who had a worried frown on his face.

"Come on Niall." He whispered before pulling the man out of the office and carefully closing the door behind them.

Harry was left flustered in his seat.

How long was Louis hiding just outside the door, how much have he heard? What did he hear!?

"Lou-" Harry started but was quickly cut off when Louis stomped his way inside, standing just a few feet in front of Harry.

Eyes showing some hints of tears but expression stormy.

"You could have told me." It was said in a whisper, but the heaviness of Louis' words was like a stab in Harry's heart.

Harry was the first to take his eyes off each other. He couldn't bear see the pain and anger in Louis, he doesn't know if he can stop himself from pulling Louis closer to him, hugging him and begging for forgiveness even if he knew that he should.

Harry was not used to Louis showing any emotion other than pure anger or plainly ignoring that Harry ever existed.

Tears should never appear on Louis blue eyes, they are supposed to crinkly in happiness behind thick rimmed glasses and shine with love directed to Harry, not this.

"I can't"

Louis finally exploded. "Why the hell not!?"

Harry knew he deserved the pain, so he stared back at Louis directly in the eye.

"Because it would have been easier for you to forget if you hated me. If you knew the truth you would start blaming yourself and I can't have that."

It seems Louis wasn't having that half assed explanation from Harry.

"There are choices Harry!" he exclaimed.

"No there's not!" Harry stood up in his seat, leveling Louis with a look. "Because It's either I leave the person I care about the most or be sent to prison while he torments your life." He continued.

Louis closed his mouth and didn't say a thing, looking at Harry's expression if there was an inch of lie to this whole story.

It didn't make sense to him it hurts him that he found out by sneaking around. How Harry never had the guts to say it in front of his face, how their friends were the first to know and he was going to be left clueless if he didn't wander around the orphanage looking for them.

But there was a part of the whole story that doesn't fall right to Louis which is why he made his presence known.

"Zayn said he was arrested last year." He cryptically adds.

Harry nodded, unsure to where the conversation was going. "He was."

Louis only looked at him dead in the eye. "You had a whole year and a half to talk to me and explain, why didn't you?"

The question took Harry aback, he fumbled on words, trying to explain but he knew where Louis was going from. He knew that it has been a year that he was freed from a manipulative contract and that he immediately quit boxing after. He ended up being an MMA fighter where he immediately came out as gay to his new agent and demanded that he will not be hiding his sexuality any time soon.

Harry's new agent Jerry couldn't care less of Harry liked sucking dicks as long as he wins his fights which unsurprisingly, he did.

There was little to no commotion about his coming out in MMA, there had been numerous openly gay fighters and the only times Harry had encountered any prejudice was during his fights, where bigheaded fighters would want to boast about their manliness and how they belittle his skills.

But there was nothing Harry can come up to explain why he didn't have the courage to seek Louis, he was afraid to find the truth. He was scared that if he tries to look for Louis then he'll see how happy he is now and by him barging on his life would ruin it.

"I thought that you could have moved on from then."

It became clear that the Louis Harry was with is not the Louis before as he watched how the man angrily grabbed his hair in frustration, as if waiting for impending boom.

"Bullshit! Does it look like I've moved on?" Tears brimming on his eyes and Harry wanted to wipe them away, to stop them from even falling but he knew that if he touched Louis, he would get rejected so he stood still.

"Lou-" Harry felt his heart breaking when again when Louis refused to listen to him more.

"No – you're right, you are absolutely right. I should just move on because that's what you have wanted." Louis laughed almost in a mad man manner, like everything was a joke and it was the funniest thing in the world.

"Listen I –"

He couldn't even finish what he was saying because Louis' eyes were piercing him, stopping him mid-sentence.

"I blamed myself for years Harry." Louis started, fake laughter now gone and replaced by quiet anger and hurt. Harry wasn't sure what was more painful. "You disappeared, without explanation and I thought it was because of me. I tried to change, I became more outgoing because maybe you were bored. I made a lot of friends but still did well in my studies in hope that you will come back and want me again."

The pain on Louis' eyes were evident, enough to make him choke.

Harry didn't know that.

He didn't know what Louis have gone through and only knows about his own pain. All the years that passed and he never did try and apologize directly to Louis because he was scared.

He was just so fucking scared, terrified of finding out the results of his consequences and poorly thought actions.

Harry cried as he landed on his knees in front of Louis, tired, hurt, broken and spent.

"I never stopped Lou." He pleaded.

Louis didn't speak for a moment and Harry waited with batter breath on what he was going to say next.

"That's what hurts more." Louis whispered brokenly. "You saying you love me but never did anything more to prove it."

And before Harry can say anything back, Louis was already walking away leaving him in the empty room.


Chapter Text

**Batch 20XX High School Graduation**


Louis couldn’t believe that he actually made it until graduation in one piece.

He never expected to meet amazing people like Zayn, Liam and Niall and no way in hell did he ever thought that he was capable of having someone by his side, supporting him and loving him despite the many flaws that he had.

Louis gave his valedictorian speech with a big smile, he knew that it was the only moment in his high school life where he didn’t have the urge to vomit while e spoke in front of a crowd.

He bowed one last time to his class and thanked everyone who congratulated him, his parents were awfully proud as they took a thousand pictures of him, but his mind was blank as his eyes tried searching for a particular person. He was trying to look for Harry at the crowd of people, he felt a bit sad not seeing him sitting in one of the graduates, but he would feel more at ease if he knew were he sat at the back with the guest.

Harry had promised that he would be here.

He hasn’t seen his boyfriend in a few days, he had a lot of work catching up as Paul requested him to spar with a semi pro athlete. Louis was very supportive and even if he did miss him dearly, he didn’t want to act so clingy.

Not seeing him again in one of the most important day of his life is a different matter.

Louis felt like his mood shifting to something closely to sadness but before he can dwell into the feeling, a hand suddenly appeared from behind covering his eyesight.

Followed by a voice whispering on his ear. “Looking for someone?”

Louis’ heart skipped a beat, a smile automatically appearing on his face as he excitedly turned around and came face to face with a smirking Harry wearing a suit and tie.

“Harry!” he greeted cheerfully before jumping over to him, hugging his tight.

Louis felt a heave load in his chest being lifted immediately.

He pulled away to stare at Harry more but the giddy expression of finally seeing Harry was replaced by a frown as his eyes caught the bruises on Harry’s face and the bandaged knuckle.

“What happened to you? Are you okay?” Louis asked in a worried voice.

Harry smiled at him reassuringly. “Just got hit while training, don’t worry about it.”

Louis wasn’t going to stop worrying about Harry, but he knows how Harry hated being the center of attention, so he decided to talk to him about it later.

He was just really glad to have him here by his side.

Louis hugged him again and buried his face on Harry’s neck, breathing him in. “I missed you.” He murmured quietly, ignoring the people around them.

Harry kissed his head and hugged him back just as tight. “I missed you too Lou.”

They stayed like that for a minute before Zayn, Liam and Niall came by their side and toppled over them.

Louis groaned when he landed on the ground. Harry chuckled and helped him back to his feet.

“Congratulations.” Harry grinned at him before fishing something on his pocket.

“Harry! I told you not to get me anything.” Louis scowled at him.

They have discussed this before.

“I know but I wanted to okay, I can’t let the smartest guy in school go away without a present.” Harry joked at him before fluttering his eyes at him cutely and giving him absurd facial expression.

Louis faked glared at him but couldn’t help the smile from appearing on his face as he opened the box where it revealed a silver necklace with a paper plane pendant hanging loosely at the middle.

Louis’ eyes widen, even if he knew what it was, he was still surprised. “Wow, i-it’s beautiful.”

Harry smiled at him sweetly before carefully taking it out from the box.

“Let me put it on you.”

Louis felt like tearing up but didn’t want to make such a big deal about it even if deep inside it was one heck of a deal for him. Harry stood behind him as he clasps the necklace to his neck, goosebumps appearing at his neck from where Harry’s breath was hitting him.

He knew it wasn’t the perfect place to sport a hard on so Louis’ willed it away and prayed for it to go away, the feeling of getting turned on was still foreign to him.

“Thank you, Harry, I really love it.” Louis turned to Harry, smiling at him gratefully.

“I’m glad you love it, I love you very much too.” Harry smiled at him lovingly, giving him a quick peck on the lips and ignoring the obvious cough from behind which they both knew was from Louis’ father.

Louis was too damn happy about everything going on though, showing his friends and family the gift.

Louis swears that this was in fact the greatest day of his life, the happiness eating him up that he failed to notice the sadness in Harry’s eye as he stared at him.



**1 week before High School Graduation**


Louis ran downstairs when the doorbell rang, ignoring the shout from his mom to be careful.

He jumped on the remaining steps and hastily opening the door, a piece of paper clutched tightly on his hands.

“I got accepted!” He shouted once the door was opened.

Harry jumped a few meters in surprise but ended up chuckling at the sight of Louis, trembling to his feet in happiness.

Harry couldn’t help but reciprocate the feeling though, he quickly hugged Louis and lifted him up in the air. Louis shrieked and laughed as he held on tight. He already knew even without context what Louis was excited and so happy about.

“Holy shit! You are?” Harry asked after carefully putting him back to the ground.

“Yes! I got the acceptance letter and they want me to go next week for a campus tour.” Louis showed him the fancy letter he received on the mail, Harry taking it and reading it carefully.

Louis felt nervous for a week waiting for the letter to arrive, his nerves were eating him even with the constant reassurance of his family, friends and Harry. He knew there were a lot of amazing schools wiling to give him a full scholarship.

Harry’s eyes were filled with proud when he finished reading, looking at Louis before pulling him for a quick kiss.

 “I’m so happy for you.” Harry muttered closely, staring at Louis with so much love.

That was it for Louis before the damn broke lose and his tears brimming on his eyes.

“Thank you so much Harry for talking to my dad.” Louis sniffed, embarrassed by the sudden lose of control on his emotions. Everything was just happening so fast that he wasn’t ready. “I really didn’t know what I could have done without you.” He finished.

Harry had previously talked to his dad about Louis’ dream of becoming a doctor, Louis didn’t have the guts to disappoint his parents and he was really willing to pursue law but Harry argued that he should pursue what he wanted.

Harry quickly wiped at his eyes, smiling at him softly.

“Nonsense, you are meant to have great things Louis.” He said before letting Louis blow his nose at his shirt, not even minding if Louis ruined his shirt.

More tears came, and Louis was sobbing mess which made his parents ran to check if he was okay.

“You are going to be the best doctor in the fucking world.” Harry whispered next to him, doing everything he could to calm him down.



**3 weeks after High School Graduation**


Louis stared outside blankly, fingers fiddling with the silver necklace wrapped around his neck, stomach growling in hunger.

He didn’t know how long or how many days have passed since he went outside, his eyes felt dry, probably dried out after the nonstop crying that he had.

He already had a permanent headache and got so used to the pain that he ignored it because no pain is greater than what his heart was feeling.

It felt like it was taken out only to be stomped on at the floor.

He heard the door to his room open but didn’t look move nor look away from the window.

He knew it wasn’t the person he was wishing to come barging into his room, his hope was long gone after the many times he wished it would.

“Lou? Are you okay? Your mom called me.” Zayn asked softly, carefully as he walked closer to where Louis had made a permanent nest near the windows.

Louis didn’t look at Zayn.

“He just left me.” He said, voice hoarse from being unused.

Zayn stared at his friend sadly, sitting next to me and just letting him know that he wasn’t alone.


They stayed like that, letting the silence fall between them.

Louis decided to ask the question that was in a continuous loop ever since Harry left him that note, a two sentence note stating that he was leaving and that to never contact him again. A sentence which struck Louis to his very core, he didn’t even know something so simple can create an impact to his life.

“What did I do wrong Zayn?”

Zayn closed his eyes and just hugged Louis.

“Don’t blame yourself Lou, you didn’t do anything.”

Louis didn’t think that he could cry anymore but tears started forming on his eyes and he was crying again, this time on Zayn’s shoulder.

“If I didn’t do anything then why did Harry leave me?” he asked brokenly to no one in particular.

Because the person who was supposed to give him the answer just left.




**Freshman Year – After Finals**


Louis was with Niall, Liam and Zayn in his dorm room.

His finals just finished, and they came to visit him to celebrate because Louis topped the class. They were going to have a chill night consists of junk foods and the avenger’s movie.

Niall was busy texting someone on his phone, Liam were on the kitchen preparing the food while Louis was busy flicking the channel. They should start the movie in half an hour, so Louis decided to entertain himself with other shows.

He froze from pressing the next button on the remote when his eyes landed on the sports channel, his breathing stopping for a minute when he saw Harry on screen.

Standing next to next to someone as photographers took their photos, it seems Harry has an upcoming fight which will be aired in national TV.

Louis still couldn’t believe that Harry had became so famous in a short couple of years.

Niall had hastily stood from where he was comfortably lying on the couch when he saw what Louis was staring at.

“Lou turn the channel bec-“ Niall wanted to snatch the remote and shut the TV off but Louis raised his hand to stop him just as the interviewer asked a question directed to Harry.

“I’m 100% straight, I don’t know where the rumors are coming from but that’s what it is, just rumors.” Harry told the girl asking the question, sending a wink to her direction as the crowd laughed around him.

Louis was frozen to his seat, heart suddenly twisting painfully in his chest as the words echoed through his ears.

“Fucking asshole.” He heard Niall shout under his breath before pulling the cord of the TV to shut it off, the last thing Louis sees was Harry staring directly at the camera, as if he was looking at Louis himself.

Liam and Zayn ran to the living room upon hearing Niall shouting, not really understanding what was going on.

Louis quickly stood up and avoided their gazes.

He was just so tired at being pitied.

“I’m just going to bed guys, it’s fine.” He waved at them but stopped when Niall pulled his sweater sleeves.

“Lou, are you okay.” He asked worriedly.

Louis smiled at him tightly before nodding.




**First Year – Practicing Doctor**


Louis sat in front of the director of the hospital, smiling politely as the guy continued to shake his hand excitedly.

“We are very pleased to have you choose our hospital for your practice.” He told him with so much smile that Louis was starting to get weirded out.

“I am very grateful that you accepted my application despite the short notice.” Louis replied with him with a much more professional smile.

He was worried the guy’s face would break in half with his constant smiling.

He was being given a small tour of the hospital where he decided to do his practice.

“It wasn’t that much hard of a decision Mr. Tomlinson, you are one of the most promising young doctors in the century, we believe it is the other way around.” The director chuckled, standing high and proud and ready to gloat to his other doctor friends on how the Louis Tomlinson chose his hospital despite the hundreds of offers.

Louis wanted to roll his eyes but decided not to because he didn’t want to seem too rude and entitled. He was grateful for the opportunity, but this was just too much.

They were suddenly being asked to step aside when a nurse ran down to the corridor where a group of nurses were busy huddling around and shouting orders.

“Is there something going on?” Louis asked as the director seemed unfazed by the commotion.

“Probably an emergency but not something that you should worry, we are the nearest hospital in the city of Las Vegas and there are bounds to be freak accidents, also, a few famous people can pop by.” He wiggled his eyebrows knowingly.

Louis knew exactly what he was trying to point out, drunken celebrities might suddenly get wheeled in for alcohol poisoning or sudden casino brawls.

Louis didn’t really care.

“I would not have mind.” Louis stated before following him when he started walking away to show Louis the prenatal ward.

Louis wasn’t going to mention that the reason he chose this hospital was because it was the nearest at Lagasse's Stadium.

The UFC Fighting stadium.



**2 weeks after first day at job**


Louis has been at the hospital for three weeks and he can finally breathe properly without the director following him around like a loyal dog. He was interested on what Louis was doing and always asking him of wat he was working on, it just seemed he was too excited to have his hospital be the place where another ground-breaking drug can be discovered.

Louis was just getting a headache.

“Hey there Doctor Tomlinson.” A nurse which Louis was sure have seen before approached him.

“Nurse Grimshaw am I correct?” he asked as he raised an eyebrow questioningly.

He already knew who he was, the head nurse of the trauma center, Nicholas Grimshaw.

Also, the guy who kept getting linked to Harry.

“Correct indeed.” The nurse grinned at Louis.

Louis didn’t like him, ever since he saw the picture of Harry clinging drunkenly to the nurse in one of a pap pic from an after party.

He wanted to punch the nurse actually but what was his right to do it? What would the reason be if they asked why he started punching people? He doesn’t have the right anymore.

“Grimshaw, your friend Harry is here to see you.” A fellow nurse called out from afar which made Louis turn around on his heels.

“Tell him to wait, I’m busy in here.” Grimshaw grumbled annoyingly.

“I’m not interested.” Louis stated before walking away, heart hammering on his chest.

“I didn’t even say anything yet?” he heard Grimshaw exclaimed in confusion.

Louis needs to walk away.



**3 weeks after first day of job**


Louis was sat inside the director’s office, he waited patiently until the fellow head doctor finished reading his request.

“You want to be assigned at the trauma center?”

“Just a change in environment.” Louis smiled tightly.

“Well if you’re sure.” The director looked at him weirdly but still signed the form

He couldn’t risk his best doctor leaving.

Louis ignored the nagging voice inside his head telling him that this was indeed a terrible idea.



**4 weeks after Louis’ first day – First proper encounter**


Louis stretched his hands above his head, sighing when he heard the pop of his bones.

He just finished a 16-hour shift and he felt so damn tired.

He was inside the doctor’s lounge, wanting a quick power nap before heading off when Meg suddenly appeared, breathing hard as if she had run to get here.

“Dr. Tomlinson! Nick requested your assistance.” She said in a hurry.

Louis closed his eyes and groaned.

 “I’m about to finish my shift Meg.” He pleaded because he really did just want to sleep and go home.

“We don’t have any available doctors.” She looks apologetic and Louis knew she wouldn’t be seeking his help if it wasn’t the last resort.

They clearly lack doctors in this hospital.

“Fine, what room?” Louis muttered before pulling his coat and dragging his feet.

“Room 317.” She smiled before taking off to do god knows what.

Louis was sleepy, and he knew how dangerous a sleepy doctor is so he slapped his face lightly when he neared the room, taking in a long deep breath and readying himself from Nick’s constant flirting.

He clearly doesn’t know how to handle a rejection because he just kept trying to ask him out.

He knocked once at the door before opening it and getting inside.

“You call for me Nick, I was kind of bu-“ Louis froze from his spot as his eyes landed on a bloodied face but even if covered in blood, those mesmerizing green eyes weren’t unnoticed as it stared back at him.




**Second Encounter – Orphanage**


Louis was gripping his bag tightly, trying not to scream as Lucas, the head of the orphanage introduced the still surprised and shock faced Harry. He didn’t expect Harry to be here, he wasn’t supposed to be here.

They just kept encountering each, Louis just wanted to breathe so he took a day off at the hospital but here he was. He also noted a new bandage on his arm which he didn’t remember ever seeing.

Was he at the hospital again?

 “This is Mr. Harry Styles, he’s one of the founders of this orphanage, he’s a real angel. He’s always dropping by to the kids and helps out volunteering too.” He proudly stated.

Louis suddenly felt dizzy, face getting a bit red in embarrassment after how he accused Harry of stalking him.

What rotten luck.

And he was the founder, why doesn’t he know about this information?

“Oh.” He croaked in reply, unsure of what to say next.

Because Harry is standing stupidly tall in front of him, eyes wide and unsure as he stared at Louis.

“Harry, this is Dr. Louis Tomlinson, he’s the doctor who organized this medical mission for the kids and volunteered to be the orphanage doctor, isn’t that great!”

“Oh.” Was the only thing Harry could reply.

“I can’t help but feel so happy to be in the same room as such kind-hearted fellows, you lads will change the future of this kids.” Lucas told them, happiness seeping out of his body as if he wanted them both to feel it.

Louis just wanted the ground to open and eat him because this was beyond awkward.






There are days where you wished that you were back in the day where life is much simpler, days consist of doing simple things such as eating with your family, playing football with your siblings or having a movie night with your friends.

Louis longed for those days free of problems, questions and revealing truths which may shake up your very core.

His breathing was erratic when he got home, ignoring the constant buzzing of his phone from his friends who had been trying to reach him. He had left them at the orphanage in a haste, he didn’t want to hear any more explanations especially after he had already heard the truth from Harry himself.

The truth in which Harry had left Louis in order for him to pursue his dream and keep his family away from getting entangled in some crazy messed up people. Louis should be grateful really because he was able to get the best education possible at his university and his dad wasn’t falsely accused of some crime he didn’t commit, but why is he still so angry about what Harry did?

Maybe it was because Harry didn’t even make an effort to explain the situation and just left Louis thinking that he just got fed up with him.

To know the truth didn’t actually make Louis feel better like everyone was expecting, instead questions after questions just got piled up and for the first time, Louis didn’t think he’d want to know the answer this time.

Frustrated tears started pooling on Louis’ eyes as he sat on his sofa inside his flat.

The whole flat was quiet and the only thing you can hear was Louis’ harsh erratic breaths, but the silence was broken by the sound of heavy knocking on Louis’ front door.

“Louis.” Someone called from behind which sounded like Zayn.

Zayn must have followed him home.

It was very typical of him to do that, always making it his responsibility that Louis wasn’t falling into a pit of depression. He was always there ever since Harry left and Louis felt great to have a friend like him but right now he wanted to be alone to sort his feelings on his own.

“Go away Zayn.” Louis said, loud enough for his friend to hear despite the constant knocking.

“You know that I have ways to open this Louis, I’m just being polite by knocking.”

Louis rolled his eyes and wiped his eyes frustratedly before going to the door and opening it with a scowl.

“I don’t know why I’m still friends with you.” Louis quipped before walking back to the living room.

Zayn chuckled lowly before following him. “Because you love me.”

“At this moment, I really doubt it.”

Zayn took a seat next to him, watching worriedly at his friend who hasn’t been home for an hour but looked totally cried out.

“Talk to me Lou.” He muttered softly while pulling Louis to lie on his back and put his head on his lap.

Louis refused but caved in after because he knew how relaxing it was to have someone play with your hair and massage your scalp.

They stayed like that for a few minutes, just letting Louis calm himself down before opening up. It almost felt like a routine between the two longtime friends.

When Louis felt like he can finally voice out his thoughts, he began.

 “What do you expect will happen after I found out? That Harry and I will be okay, and everything will go back to the way it was?”

Zayn kept quiet, he knew it was better for Louis to just spill it all out before he makes any response.

“This isn’t some fairy tale Zayn.” He continued with a scoff.

All inhibition of a wonderful happy ever after vanished the day Harry left him without a word. Louis had a hard time trusting anyone ever again after that.

“I never said it was.”

“Am I supposed to be grateful? Or am I selfish for still being angry despite knowing the truth?” Louis asked unsure.

He had been trying to kick some sense into him, but he just couldn’t push the feeling of betrayal away.

“Your feelings are valid, no one told you to forgive him.” Zayn stated honestly.

“The thing is, I want to forgive him. I really do.” Louis closed his eyes, heart aching when he remembered how Harry looked earlier on his knees, begging Louis to forgive him. “But it’s been a year since he was out of that contract, he had those days to contact me and explain.”

He quickly removed his head on Zayn’s lap to stand up and face him, eyes questioning.

“Why didn’t he?” he asked him before starting to pace on the living room.

His head was about to explode. He was sure he was going to bust a nerve or two with how hard he was trying to work his brain up.

“I don’t know his reasons Louis.” Zayn shrugged apologetically.

Louis knew that Zayn couldn’t possibly know the reason but neither does he.

“He keeps saying that he still loves me, but I can’t justify his actions.” Louis groaned in annoyance.

All the questions hitting him like a train.

“No one is forcing you to get back together.”

Louis knew that because he doesn’t owe Harry anything after he broke his heart.

“That’s the funny thing, my heart keeps saying yes but my mind is hell bent on saying no.” Louis was internally screaming because nothing is more frustrating than your rational thinking and you emotional feeling going into debate.

Zayn must have noticed Louis’ internal conflict because he quickly guided him back to take a seat.

“Shh calm down Lou.”

“Should I just try to move on?” Louis asked.

He did everything he can to move on, he tried dating other people but it all doesn’t work out because Louis always chickens out when it got too serious. Or maybe it was because there are still nights where he was lying next to someone that his mind automatically thinks of Harry, comparing them to Harry and feeling disappointed when he found out that they were never going to be as good as Harry.

Which in all honestly, is so messed up.

Zayn shook his head and took a deep breath. “I can’t answer that for you.”

Louis wanted to scream at Zayn for not giving the answers he desperately needed but what does Zayn have to do with anything really, he was just here to make sure that Louis doesn’t do anything stupid like lock himself again for days and starve to death.

Louis was an adult already, he should have a better control of his emotional state but no.

He’s still so fucked up deep inside, too many unresolved issues.

“It’s my own fault really, I should have just accepted the offer to start my practice at fucking Switzerland but no, I chose the hospital where he kept getting treated for his injuries because a part of me still wants to see him.”

Admitting to his own mistake was difficult and maybe Zayn had an idea of it too when Louis voiced out his plan to accept the offer but didn’t stop him whatsoever.

Louis decided that it was enough break down for the day. “I should sleep, I still have work tomorrow.”

“You should.” Zayn nodded.

“Thanks for hearing me out Zayn, I’m sorry for being a bother. I’m a grown adult but I’m having love problems like a fucking teenager.”

“Shut up and go to bed and stop overthinking.” Zayn gave him a small smile before ushering him inside his bedroom.

There will no promises of not overthinking and crying.

It’s going to be such a long night.