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Falling For You Is My Mistake

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Let me show you how I caught you now
You can’t get out
Won’t let you escape from what you’re a slave to
Your every word I use and abuse so
Follow me
~ Dear Agony – Follow Me ~

“Fuck this traffic. We are going to be late.” Dean, his manager, drove the car skillfully among Bangkok’s chaotic traffic but even he can't work miracles. They will be late for the next meeting nonetheless. Dean tried to call the dance teacher that they were on their way to but the man didn’t answer his phone.

“I’m sorry for this. If only the photo shooting hadn't stretched so long. I calculated today’s schedule completely wrong.”

His manager rarely got anxious about anything, so Team wasn't surprised that a possible delay didn’t get the man's strict demeanor crack. His appreciation for his manager had increased during each tough situation they faced. Dean had become his manager when he had moved from modeling to acting. And he was overly grateful for that day. The few years older man was a strict and cold-blooded guy who didn’t let anything discompose himself. Team trusted him completely and was quite sure that the man could move the mountains if he so wished.

“Luckily for us, Win is the easy going guy and probably not getting upset about the slight delay even though his schedule is fully booked.”

“Are you sure?”

“Well… At least I hope so.” Dean cast a tight lipped smile in his direction through the rearview mirror.

“Not convincing…” He sighed and leaned against the back seat of the car. Giving a bad first impression did not calm his nervousness.

Once again, he wondered if he had made the right decision. The fact that they had difficulty reaching an appointment with the dance teacher was already a clear sign that he should reconsider. The model’s work had been easy, it had come from him naturally. Likewise, the transition to acting. Singing and playing had always been his hobbies. Already in model times, he sometimes held IG live performances for his fans, where he played guitar and sang his favorite songs, sometimes even his own compositions. The number of fans had grown after he became an actor and Dean had figured out that he could have a real concert to their delight.

To his horror concerts also required dancing, which was certainly not his field. He was frankly miserable in it. He was quite sure he had been born with two left legs. But Dean had had a solution for it, too. He had hired a professional dance teacher for Team with a quick phone call, and not just any dance teacher but the best one in the whole Bangkok. He had, frankly, groaned in despair after hearing it. But Dean had just smiled contentedly and marked training times on Team’s schedule. At times, he felt like his manager was a sadistic tyrant.

For a good fee, the dance teacher, Win, has agreed to tweak the training times for Team on his busy schedule. He has gained a lot of reputation for his skillful style of education and the fact that his choreographies were hot and sexy without being too vulgar.

“We'll be there soon. We are about 10 minutes late on schedule. I'll leave you in front of the dance school, go inside to sign up for Win while I'm looking for a parking space for the car. And remember that he doesn’t know that his new client is you.” His cruel manager orders.

Great… Just great. He just hated the idea of dancing and now he should meet some random dance teacher without the security of his manager. The famous dancer who didn’t even know that he was supposed to teach dancing to the newest rising star of Thailand’s entertainment business. But knowing it was pointless to argue against Dean, he prepared for the coming ordeal by taking a deep breath and trying to calm his prickly nerves.

A sudden movement swung him against the car door. A long litany of curses escaped from Dean when he narrowly managed to avoid encountering a car coming from a side road.

“Are you alright?” Concern laced his voice. The younger man rubbed his shoulder, which had hit hard against the door.

“Yeah, I’m okay.”

Frankly, he was a little bit shaken. Another clear sign that he should cancel this whole mistake. But before he could let the words out of his mouth, Dean announced that they were already there. As he got out of the car, he looked suspiciously at the building in front of him, the facade of which was adorned with brightly colored advertisements about the dance school inside. There was no longer a chance to retreat so he hoped his heart would calm down and stepped inside.


If this can no longer hold
My heart will stop beating
Then like this may be how
I die my first death
But what if that moment's right now
~ BTS – Black Swan ~

Stepping into the large, brightly colored lobby, he was confused by its unfinishedness. Only several doors of different colors stood out from the walls. What the hell was this place? All those colors hurt his eyes. How in the world would he find Win here, should he go knocking on every door? While pondering the issue, some music carried to his ears. Turning toward the music he heard, he noticed that one of the doors was slightly ajar.

He walked to the door and pushed it open more. As he was about to call out the greeting, he froze in the doorway.
What he saw rendered him speechless. What is that? Or should he rather say who was that and how the man could move like that? Because inside there was a man swirling and jumping gracefully around the large room. The music echoed from the audio devices in the corner of the room. The song was easy to identify as it had been at the top of all the charts for a long time. And he had to admit that the music fit the man’s dance as if done for it. The heartbeat of the song seemed to pulsate inside him too, wrapping him in the world created by the notes. He just couldn’t take his eyes off the man. His movements were alluring… Masculine… Sexy…

Coming to other thoughts about the greeting, he crossed his arms and leaned a shoulder and jeans clad hip against the door frame silently and admired the man's smooth movements. His golden blond hair was gathered partially on the top of his head as a samurai bun. Even from this distance, Team was able to distinguish dark root growth. So the man was not blonde by nature but had bleached his hair. Nice. It suited him. Even though the man moved quickly from one dance position to another, Team could see several silver colored piercings decorating his ears and many tattoos adorning his smooth, fair skin. And what the man was wearing… Or… Why the man was only wearing some loose fitting pants and nothing else. The man had a sleek, powerful build and Team had to remind himself not to drool. His fingers yearned to touch him, his mouth to taste him. The most prominent sight still was the two large black wings tattooed in the man's back. The way he moved made it look like a big beautiful black swan was ready to rise on its wings.

Beautiful. Magnificent. Amazing. Breathtaking.

And many other praising words came into his mind while he stared at the man. Frozen in his place, blood pumping in his veins at an accelerating pace, heart hammering so loud that he had troubles hearing the music, his hands were sweating, and he was quite sure that his cheeks were flushed to bright red. The want, the need, the desire cursed through him. He had long since come to terms with the fact that he liked both, boys and girls. At first it had been a real shock and he had fought against it with all he had. Over the years, he eventually had to admit his defeat and surrender to the fact of it. But there hasn't been anything or anyone in his life before which he had wanted in a similar way he wanted the man dancing in the room.

The blond man glided to his final position and the music ended. Deep silence filled the room and Team blinked rapidly a couple of times as he returned to reality. Finally the man got up from his position and walked with a few fast steps to the mini fridge tucked in the corner of the room, near the audio devices. He pulled out a bottle of water and quickly consumed the entire contents of the bottle at once. After taking a towel from the basket next to the equipment the man rubbed his sweaty face and neck with it. He shook his hair free of its bun, letting it cascade around his head before he started rubbing the damp mob of blond hair furiously with the towel.

Perhaps it was finally a good time to announce his presence, clearing his throat a few times was what was needed. Upon hearing the sound, the man on the other side of the room turned around with a quick move. He was still lightly panting due to a recent dance performance.

Team pushed himself away from the door frame he had been leaning and started walking towards the dancer.
His walk had been called sensual more than a few times during his modeling years and for once he was very pleased with it as the man’s gaze followed his every step. However, the distance between them in the large dance hall was so great that he didn’t exactly distinguish the dancer’s eyes nor the expression in them. Wrapping a towel around his neck, the blond man began to walk towards him. Team’s breath hitched as the man came nearer.

The golden halo around the dancer’s head made him look like an angel, but that smirk on his lips… Oh damn. It gave to his naturally angelic features such a devilish expression that it revealed his true nature. Of course, bleached hair, tattoos and piercings also gave a strong vibe of it.

Damn, he was hot!

They met in the middle of the room. Up close Team saw that the man was slenderer than him, but he had the lean, wiry physique of a dancer. He couldn’t help but admire the planes and contours of his chest, arms, and shoulders.
The characteristic scent of the man, mixed with sweat, hit his nose and made his knees wobble. With great effort he was able to disguise the effect of the man and greeted him casually.

“Hey. You dance pretty well.”

“Well thank you. How long were you watching?” The dancer smiled. Team stared deeply into his dark eyes.

“Long enough…”

He knew that his voice was heavy with sexual heat and the other man clearly noticed it. His mouth stretching into a toothy grin. His stare roamed over Team’s body, starting from his face and down to his shoes and then back up. The golden haired man's eyes glinted, clearly liking what he saw.

“Glad you liked it. It is a choreography for a future performance of one of the dance groups.“

“Not for you?” Team frowned. The song and the dance had been like created especially for the man.

“No, not for me. I do a lot of choreographies for other dancers.”

Chuckling softly the man raised the corner of the towel and swept away a few drops of sweat rising on his forehead.
Team wanted to lick those drops away and in any other part of his body. The glint in the man's eyes revealed that he knew what kind of effect he had on Team. Theirs was a mutual attraction, there was no doubt about that.

“I’m Win by the way. Nice to meet you. What brings you here?”

“Nice to meet you too. I’m Team and… Apparently your new student.”

His words had the same effect as throwing a bucket of ice-cold water on the man. There was a shock in the dancer’s eyes before he could veil his gaze. And Team could feel the man retreat even though he didn't take a single step away from him.

Before they could say a word, Dean walked in through the open door.


So lock the door
And throw out the key
Can't fight this no more
It's just you and me
And there's nothing I, nothing I, I can do
I'm stuck with you, stuck with you, stuck with you
~ Ariana Grande & Justin Bieber - Stuck with U ~

After meeting the actor, Win rushed to the dance hall next door where his business partner Manaow was stretching with Pharm, another dance teacher of their school. They both stopped in the middle of the move to stare with surprised looks at the man plunging inside, who looked like a herd of ghosts was on his hocks. They both knew that the ghosts were the ones Win feared the most.

The dancer’s eyes were desperate and pleading, a hint of madness glowing on their depths. His hands were already groping the blond hair flowing around his face, free from his typical man bun. He stopped in front of his friends, bending forward, leaning his hands on his knees, panting like he had run a marathon.

”Oh god! You two need to help me. And I mean seriously HELP me. I'm in deep trouble!”

”What's the matter, Win? You look like you have seen a ghost or rather a bunch of those?”

Taking a deep breath, the blond man tried to steady his breath and calm down enough to be able to explain the situation to his friends. He felt his heart thudding hard enough to crack his ribs, and it was difficult to breath.

“Do you remember about the meeting this evening I told you about earlier? The meeting with the famous actor, whose manager booked me to do choreography for his big performance as well as dancing in it. Actually they booked the whole dance group as background dancers so you both will also be dancing in it.”

“Oh... Are you talking about the actor whose name was not revealed to you beforehand?” The cute, smaller man tilted his head, a voice full of curiosity.

“Yeah. I do know now why they didn’t tell it beforehand. I just met him…”

“Don’t be mean, just spit it out. Who is he?”

“It is TEAM!” Win almost shouted and threw his hands into the air in despair.

“No way? Team?” Manaow covered her mouth with her hand, opening her eyes wider than they had ever been opened before.

Pharm stared at him speechless, frozen in place from the shock.

“Yeah. THE Team. The newest and hottest raising actor of the whole entertainment business that everyone is talking about.”

“Oh my god! We are going to dance with HIM! In his concert! OH MY GOOOOOOOD!!!… I can’t believe it. WE ARE GOING DANCE WITH TEAM!!! I LOOOOOOVE HIM!!!” Jumping excitedly in place, Manaow screamed with a loud voice and clung to Pharm, forcing the younger boy to jump with her.

“MANAOW! I want to be able to hear even after this day.” Pharm tried to cover his ears while forced to jump at the same pace as the girl.

Win’s lips set in a tight line and clapped his hands on his hips. It should come as no surprise that Manaow missed the whole point of the discussion. Damn, he was having an internal crisis here and the girl was just completely enchanted by the fact that they got a chance to dance in the famous actor’s show. But knowing the girl thoroughly, he knew there was no way to have a rational conversation until the girl calmed down. So he couldn't help but wait and while doing it his thoughts turned towards the young man he had just met.

How his heart had hammered in his chest when he had understood that the man, who he found very attractive was his newest client. In other words, any kind of interaction except teaching dancing was forbidden with him. The frantic fear had pulsed like a living thing through him. How in the world he would be able to control his desires?! Especially when the ebony haired man had practically exuded a strong interest towards him. When the attraction had not been one sided?! He was so doomed.

After a while the hysteric fit of Manaow subsided and he saw intelligence returning to her eyes. The girl noticed his irritated appearance.

“Why do you look like that? Isn’t it a good thing that we get to perform in his show?”

“It is great, I am very happy for this opportunity. But there is something else that bothers me.” He started pacing in front of them, clenching and opening his fists, grinding his teeth, clearly troubled.

“Win, what’s wrong?” Pharm’s calm tone of voice made him stop from his restless pacing. There was a torment in his eyes as he glanced at his friends.

“You do know what the most important rule of mine? Which I have always complied with and which I do not intend to break, ever!”

“Sure we know. All of us know. You have proclaimed it for so many times that we know it by heart.” Then Manaow began ranting his golden rule from memory and Pharm joined her. In a solemn voice they pronounced it together.

“The client is always the client. Only allowed interaction is teaching the dancing. Any other kind of relationship is strictly forbidden. Even if you are attracted to them, never show it to them. This is purely business.”

“Yeah, yeah! I get it! I might have mentioned it a few times…” Their attempt to joke didn’t affected to agitated Win. The man just rolled his eyes and huffed. Crossing his arms over his chest.

“A FEW?!” Both exclaimed out loud.

“How about a couple of thousand times, give or take!” Manaow smirked. She absolutely loved the situations where she was able to mess up with the golden haired man. The man was a master of teasing and more than often they had been in the receiving part of his intelligent quips.

“So what has this all got to do with Team?” Well thank you, Pharm. The only reasonable person in his team. The only one who had not forgotten the main issue in this discussion.

“It's got everything to do with him!” An anxious tone of his voice finally made them understand.

”No way… You… Team… You are actually interested in HIM!” Manaow took a deep breath as the root cause of Win's panic finally dawned on her. Pharm’s mouth dropped open.

A flush of shameful red spread over his cheeks. He had never even thought he would get into this situation. His mouth moved but remained soundless. There were no words to explain. Manaow came up to him and hugged him tightly.

“It will be alright. We will help you. Right, Pharm?” The smaller boy joined their hug.

“Definitely. You won’t be alone in this.”

“He was attracted to me. I could feel it. I will have to work closely with him for the next couple of months. What am I going to do?” Pressing his blond head against Manaow's shoulder, he sighed. Never before had he experienced a similar attraction to anyone even though he had a lot of experience in that field.

“What if…” Hesitation was laced in Pharm's voice.

“What if you make him believe that you are already in a relationship. That would show him that you are not available, and he will hopefully lose his interest.”

Win was not prepared for the amount of pain the thought caused him. But he knew he couldn’t get the man and the thought of it tore at his insides.

“Just saying that you are in a relationship is not enough. He might not believe you…” Manaow mused.

“You need someone to act as your partner.” Satisfied with her own suggestion, the girl smiled broadly.

“You only meet each other here at the dance school. For us to make him believe you are taken, it has to be someone from here...” She tapped her finger on her chin and hummed while clearly thinking of suitable candidates.

“How about you?” They both turned to look at Pharm in dismay.



“Yeah. You. In any case, you are in the show and we have joint dance lessons with Team. During those you can show that you are together with Win. We will tell the whole group the truth, so they know how to act along. Your boyfriend is less likely to visit here anyway and you can tell him in advance what is going on so he knows to stay away.”

“Pharm, you are a genius! That is a perfect plan!”

“Are you going to ask me at all if I agree with the plan?” Frowning, the golden haired man at glared his friends.



So it was agreed. Manaow was going to act as his girlfriend, to keep him in check and away from Team. Pharm was going to monitor his actions closely and help them when needed. Although common sense told Win he had made the right decision, his heart ached with the loss of a potential lover. But this was the best for everyone. The reputation of the dance studio was at stake if rumors started to spread that he had something going on with one of the clients.


We found each other
I helped you out of a broken place
You gave me comfort
But falling for you was my mistake
~ Seraphim – Call Out My Name ~

The dance lessons started as agreed, following the same pattern each time. Either Team’s manager or mother brought the actor to the dance school at the agreed time. Team’s mother usually just brought her son and went out to take care of her own affairs during the rehearsals. But Dean, Team’s manager brought a folding chair with him and sat in the corner of the room reading a newspaper and slurped coffee from the giant thermos mug he brought with him while not paying any attention to them when they practiced movements for Team's stage performance.

During the rehearsals it didn’t do any good for Win’s peace of mind to see the dark haired man making movements that he himself had honed to be sensual, even sexual, without being too lewd. It was known that the audience would consist mainly of female fans and they appreciated the visually spectacular show. Win had done his best to accomplish that requirement. While the performance was intended to be sensual, it still had to be stylish and highlighting Team’s best qualities. When creating the choreography, he had not even thought about the possibility of being so attracted to the man and having to suffer when teaching him it. Every hip trust, every body roll taunted him dangerously. More than once, his self-control was close to the breaking point. The man’s masculine energy tempted him, and the fury of desire trembled within him. In his own mind, he had earned an actor award for how professional he was able to perform despite all the internal turmoil. But Manaow and Pharm laughed hysterically when, after each rehearsal, he rushed to take an ice cold shower to get himself back under control. Friends were the worst if his opinion was asked.

Another evening, another rehearsal. Even to his own surprise, Team had proved quite flexible. Also owning the two left legs was proved untrue. Almost no movement choreographed by Win had caused him insurmountable difficulty. Except the complex pirouette combination. They honed its movements together and Win couldn’t help but burst out laughing when Team once again tangled in his legs and fell on his butt.

“Ouch! Dammit!” A frustrated groan escaped his lips.

“Stop laughing you idiot! This is all your fault!”

“How can it be my fault if you are the one sweeping the floor with your butt?”

“Because you're forcing me to do this idiotic move.”

“It’s called pirouette…” Win chuckled and held out his hand to help him up from the floor.

“Whatever…” The younger man rolled his eyes and pushed his hand aside, getting up by himself.

“Follow my lead. I will show you how to maintain balance while spinning.” The blond man smirked and took the starting position to the pirouette.

“Watch carefully!”

Team quirked his eyebrow inquisitively. His bold stare assessed him frankly. Win could feel the heat rising from the churning in the pit of his stomach as he felt the dark haired man's gaze bore into him as he explained the movement while doing it slowly at the same time. Fighting against a shiver of arousal he finished the spins. Although they had introduced Manaow as his girlfriend, it had not had the desired effect. Team had not said anything, only smiled captivatingly. Manaow was already his fan anyway, so that smile had wreaked havoc. It had not changed anything. His attraction towards Win was still there and easily read from how he looked at the blond man. He suspected that the younger man knew what effect he had on him and was just stalling until he would fell into his arms like a ripe fruit dropping from the tree.

“Ooookay… I think I got it now.” Tilting his head, Team looked pensive. He then performed the pirouette without any problems.

Sometimes Win reported their progress to Dean during the rehearsals. The manager just muttered a brief answer and then returned to his coffee and newspaper. Clearly not understanding any of the dance terms Win used. Win rolled his eyes and often Team joined him, hiding his snickering behind his hand. He had already gotten used to Dean’s uninterested behavior but for Win it was something to get used to. The blond man was an extrovert by nature and interacting with the man of a completely opposite nature caused him difficulties.

Dean’s stoic demeanor changed only when they had the group trainings. He folded his newspaper, put down his gigantic thermos mug and followed the dancers with his piercing gaze. His eyes were following each of them but more often Win noticed his gaze following one certain, smaller male dancer, Pharm.

He folded his newspaper and sat down his gigantic thermo mug and followed the dancers with his piercing gaze. His eyes were following each of them but more often Win noticed his gaze following one certain, smaller male dancer, Pharm. He was obviously smitten by the cute man even that nothing on his face revealed it. But Win was some sort of emphatic, very attuned of attractions between others. The interest between the two was clearly noticeable.

After one exercise, Win pulled the dancer to the side. He talked about Dean and the brilliant red blush spread to the smaller, cuter male’s face revealed that the attraction was not exactly one sided. Pharm was stuttering and did not know where to look when Win talked (teased) him about Team’s manager.

“I can introduce you to him if you want?”

“No, no, NO! Absolutely not!” Pure horror in Pharm's face was hilarious to look at and Win snickered. It was amusing that he was not the only one who felt attraction towards someone and was teased about it.

“We have had these group rehearsals too many times for it to seem casual. You can’t do that!”

Nothing made Pharm change his mind and Win was left wondering how to bring those two together. He was a hopeless romantic and because Pharm was one of his oldest and dearest friends, he wanted him to find the perfect partner. Somehow strict and rigid Dean seemed appropriate for him.

To Win’s own surprise, he developed a good relationship with Team’s mother. When she came to pick up her son, she sometimes stayed to follow their exercises and exchanged a few words with him. Mostly asking Team’s progress with memorizing the choreographics. But little by little, Win noticed that their conversations shifted to more private topics as Team’s mother asked about his family, life, and dance school. If he had known what kind of conversation Team had with his mother after one rehearsal he would have been totally flustered.

“Your dance teacher is a very interesting person…”


“Always so polite and well mannered. And he is quite handsome too…”

Yeah right. The blond man was the worst kind of flirt there was. All the time giving him those cocky masculine grins, staring at him with those jet black eyes, touching him while trying to guide him to perform the movements correctly, always saying “Follow my lead.” while dancing beside him. In short driving him crazy.

“Mom… He is just my dance teacher. Nothing more, nothing less.”

“Don’t try! Do you think I haven’t noticed how you two look at each other? You are clearly both interested in each other.”

“Mom… Please…”

Team ran his fingers rather desperately through his hair. His mother eagerly wanted to get involved in his relationships, fearing he would never find a partner because of his hectic lifestyle. He knew that his mother meant only good but wasn't it a little embarrassing that the mother of the man of his age was acting as a marriage arranger.

”Why aren’t you two dating? I like him. He is perfect as a son-in-law.”


“I wonder which of us wins the bet, me or Dean…”

“Bet on what??”

“Nothing important, just about how long it will take until you two will start dating.”

There was a wide smile on his mother's face and a glint in her eyes, which made him groan. It meant that his mother already had plans made about him and Win. He barely contained the irresistible need to hit his head against something hard. Repeatedly. It scared him enormously to even think what kind of stories his mom had already shared with Win. Thank god she had not dragged their family photo albums with her and shown the blond man all his embarrassing baby pictures.



”How could you!”

”Oh come on… He is a great catch. You should be flattered that the man like Win is interested in you.”

“MOM! He has a girlfriend!” Team yelled throwing his hands up into air.