Peter woke up to sticky sheets and legs still slick from the fluid pouring out of him. He groaned and pushed up on trembling arms, whimpering. The light was still on and Ned had his headphones in, sitting at his desk hunched over what was most likely a comic book. Peter sobbed as he acknowledged that his Alpha had left him again.
He had expected it, he knew it would happen, because it always did, but it still hurt every time. Ned lifted his head at the scent of distressed Omega that suddenly spiked around them. It was quickly covered by the scent of Peter's slick, but the Beta was already swiveling around in his chair, a look of pity on his face.
Peter just grimaced and let his arms give under him. He sobbed, burying his face in his pillow. Ned sighed, pulling his earbuds out of his ears and sitting on the edge of Peter's bed.
"You okay, Peter?"
Peter shook his head.
"When did he-" Peter started to ask, but his voice broke off.
He couldn't even say it, but he didn't have to.
"About twenty minutes ago."
Tears spilled over and ran down Peter's cheeks and his sobs only grew when he shifted slightly and his entire body tensed up in pain. He was sore and achy and it would all be worth it if his Alpha was here, but he wasn't. Peter wanted to hate him for leaving, but he couldn't bring himself to hate Wade.
He loved him too damn much. It hurt to love so deeply.
Peter knew that he'd have to get up in the morning and dance and he'd be cursing Wade for this. He also knew that he'd ask Natasha about him the moment he saw her.
"I'm an idiot, Ned."
"No, Peter, you're not. You're just-" Ned paused for a moment. "In love."
Peter laughed, but it was a bitter sound, lacking humor.
"Love makes you do stupid things. Like keeping letting a bad man into your life."
"Wade's not bad for you, Pete." Ned said.
"I know, he's perfect." Peter groaned.
"That's not what I'm saying. That man is as far from perfect as someone can get, and he's definitely dangerous, but he'd do anything for you. He's soft with you in a way that I'm pretty sure he isn't with anyone else."
Peter glanced over at his roommate.
"You're pretty wise you know that?"
"I wish my mom felt that way. She's threatening to stop paying for my classes if I fail algebra again."
"You're an art major. Why do you even have to take a math class?"
"Apparently I have to prove my math competency or something stupid like that."
Peter rolled his eyes.
"Says the dance major with a minor in biology."
"Yeah, but I like that kind of thing, you don't. It's different."
Ned just shook his head and stood up. "I'm going to go grab a chocolate bar from the vending machine. You want something?"
Peter didn't want to wake up when his alarm went off in the morning. He didn't want to face the day and pretend that everything was fine the way he always did. He felt numb inside, but that wasn't new. He never felt anything when Wade was gone.
Still he smiled and waved at classmates as he passed them in the hall. He helped Ned with his algebra homework, which meant giving him most of the answer. He managed to make it through the day just fine.
He was holding it all together just waiting for his ballet class that evening. He was sore and cursed Wade throughout his three hours of contemporary that morning, but he still sought out Natasha immediately when he entered the studio.
Natasha walked over to him and gave him a sympathetic smile. Peter smiled back, wondering how she always seemed to know that he was one thread away from falling apart at the seams.
"Hey, Nat, how was your weekend?" Peter said cheerily.
He didn't feel cheery, but he never really did anymore. Natasha ignored his question and set down her dance bag.
"How are you holding up, ларушечка?"
"I'm good! You?"
Natasha frowned at him and Peter's smile wavered. What did he do wrong this time? Usually she played along and smiled, acting like everything was fine, so what was different this time. Natasha didn't say anything though, she just changed into her leotard and tights, slipping on her ballet slippers and went to the bar to stretch.
Peter sighed in relief and followed suit. Everything was fine throughout dance, well nothing was fine, but nothing out of the ordinary happened. That was fine, Peter could live with that. What he couldn't live with was being confronted. After class Natasha pulled him aside.
"I know that he's gone, Peter. You don't need to lie to me. You can tell me how you're really feeling."
Peter furrowed his brows in confusion.
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"Wade, Peter. I know he left."
Peter didn't understand why she was bringing that up, but he assumed she was talking about last night. Natasha was one of Wade's contacts, someone that he's worked with before so she must have talked to him today. Peter's stomach fluttered at the thought of Wade talking about him, bringing him up like Peter was his and he was telling his friend about him, or his acquaintance, since Wade and Natasha can't really be considered friends.
"Of course he left, Nat. I knew he would. We don't live together or anything." Peter said.
Natasha's frown deepened.
"So you're okay with it?"
"Why wouldn't I be? He'll come back around when he's horny. He always does." Peter told her, shrugging it off like it was no big deal when the truth was that it killed Peter a little bit inside everytime Wade walked away.
He never knew when or if Wade would return, but he always got his hopes up, hoping that next time would be different. It never was but that didn't stop the boy from hoping.
Natasha narrowed her eyes at him, searching for something but Peter wasn't sure what.
"What if he doesn't come back this time?" She asked.
Peter swallowed, but forced himself to smirk.
"He'll be back. You know what they say, once an Alpha gets a taste of a submissive, they'll starve themselves before they accept anything less." Peter teased, all snark and sass.
Natasha rolled her eyes.
"Whatever. If you ever want to know where your Alpha is, all you have to do is ask. I'll hunt him down for you."
"He's not my Alpha." Peter called after her retreating form.
Natasha just laughed.
Peter groaned and hiked his bag up higher on his shoulder, trying not to wince from the pain in his lower back as he walked down the hall.
Weeks turned into a month and then two and Peter felt hollow inside, like he was moving through life without really being aware of what he was doing. He danced and his teacher criticized him for lack of emotion, but he had no emotion to show. He felt nothing, because that was easier than feeling the pain and the anger and the resentment that was building inside of him.
He went to a meeting that Natasha set up with Tony Stark and he smiled and tried to play it off like he wasn't dead inside. He was fairly certain the man would not be calling him back but he didn't really care. He didn't really care about anything anymore. He just wanted Wade to come back.
Natasha invited him out to get drinks after dance one day and he tried to turn down her offer. Natasha wasn't one to easily take no for an answer, which is how they ended up at her place. Peter was too young to go to a bar, but he was old enough to die for his country, which honestly made no sense.
Peter stared blankly out the window of the apartment Natasha shared with Pepper. She was mixing drinks for them and cursing because she was awful at it.
"Of my many talents, mixing drinks is unfortunately not a skill I ever picked up. Clint though, now he makes a mean margarita." Natasha told him with a smirk.
Peter accepted the drink she offered him, but eyed it warily. Natasha rolled her eyes.
"I didn't poison it."
Peter glanced sideways at her before taking a sip and grimacing.
"You sure about that? 'Cause this is awful. Is this supposed to be a margarita?"
"It is a margarita."
"No, it's not. How did you mess it up so badly?"
Natasha narrowed her eyes at him but snatched the drink out of his hand. She dumped the drinks down the drain and poured shots of tequila instead.
"I've always preferred straight shotting tequila anyway."
Peter laughed and for the first time in what felt like forever it didn't feel forced. He wasn't sure how many shots they did but at some point Peter found himself lying on the rug with his feet up on the couch.
"You're such a lightweight." Natasha said, downing another shot.
Peter just giggled and stared up at the ceiling fan like it was the most entertaining thing ever.
"I'm just glad you're smiling." Natasha said.
Peter glanced over at her.
"Yeah, I guess I haven't been doing that much lately. There isn't much of a reason to smile anymore."
Natasha gritted her teeth.
"He's an asshole."
Peter swallowed and shifted his position until he was sitting with his legs crossed.
"He's not coming back is he?"
"I can make him."
Peter shook his head, that familiar feeling of loneliness settling over him again.
"No, I don't want to make him do anything. I just want him to want me. I should have known I was nothing but a quick fuck when he refused to claim me. Him sneaking in through my window should have been a red flag too, huh?" Peter said, smirking.
"Probably. But Peter, Wade would do anything for you. He'd die for you. That's not something that you just walk away from."
"I didn't walk away."
They lapsed into silence again, it wasn't uncomfortable it was just quiet.
Pepper raised a questioning brow when she got home but her Omega just shrugged and kissed her cheek.
"He might be sick when he wakes up. I don't think he's very good at holding his liquor."
"And where are you going?"
"To visit a friend. I'll be back in a couple of hours. There's a good chance he'll stay like that until I return."
Pepper glanced over at the Omega passed out on their couch and sighed. She grabbed a blanket and tucked it around him before grabbing the shot glasses off of the coffee table and taking them to the kitchen.
Natasha found Wade in a bar that he visited frequently, hunched over his drink.
"You look like shit." She said.
Wade's eyes snapped up to see her and he glared at her.
"The fuck are you doing here?"
Natasha just smirked and took a seat next to him.
"Whiskey neat." She told the bartender.
Wade gritted his teeth when she ignored him, but maybe it was for the better. He didn't want to talk to Natasha. He knew why she was here and he really didn't want to think about Peter. Which is why he was currently trying to drown his sorrows and regrets in a bottle.
"He's at my house."
Wade jolted at the reminder, briefly considering demanding to be taken to him. He shoved that desire aside. He needed to stay away from that Omega, for both their sakes. Wade had realized that on top of being bad for Peter, Peter was a liability. Wade couldn't make himself leave because he was too attached to him and he worried too much for the boy's safety.
"You never left."
Wade just grunted and downed his drink.
"I have something to take care of first."
"I've seen you around the university. You're watching him."
"And so what if I am? He's mine to watch."
"Is he? I don't see any mark on him."
Wade gritted his teeth.
"What the hell do you want, Natalia?"
"I want to know who threatened him. You're acting like an Omega whose pup has been threatened."
"I'm acting like an Alpha whose Omega is too damn weak to protect himself." Wade growled.
"Peter's stronger than you think and I thought he wasn't yours, or have you decided to claim him?"
"He's not, but if anyone touches him I'll kill them."
"So who threatened to touch him?"
"Someone from my past who clearly didn't remember what I'm capable of. Don't worry I reminded them. They won't be causing any problems for anyone again."
"Good. If you didn't kill them I would have, but Wade?" Wade narrowed his eyes at her. "You're hurting him every time you walk away and I won't forgive you for that as easily as Peter will."
"You think I don't know he's in pain. I've been watching him, I can tell he's miserable. I'd rather him miserable and alive than dead though."
Natasha downed her drink, slamming the glass down on the bar and leaned over to whisper in Wade's ear.
"I would kill you if I didn't think it'd just hurt him more. Get your shit together and come pick up your Omega."
"You're not gonna give me your address?" Wade called after her as she walked away.
Natasha turned around, a perfectly manicured brow raised.
"Please, we both know the only reason you're not stalking him right now is because you know he's passed out on my couch."
Wade snorted and pushed up to follow her, leaving some bills on the bar as payment.
Pepper was sitting on a sofa chair when the door opened. She glanced up, smiling at her Omega, but it turned to a frown when she saw Wade there too.
"I didn't realize you were bringing your friend home."
"He's here for Peter." Natasha said slipping off her shoes before settling herself in Pepper's lap.
Wade stood by the door for a moment before shutting the door and walking over to the couch. Pepper watched him cautiously, but Natasha didn't seem in the slightest bit concerned. Peter was drooling in his sleep, his hair tousled and his hands curled up in the couch blanket.
Wade's lips twitched into a smile at the sight. His heart soaring now that he had his Omega close. It hadn't been that long, barely two months, but it was longer than usual and the distance was excruciating. Wade ran his hand down Peter's side, loving the way his Omega shifted and whimpered in his sleep.
"Come on, princess. Let's get you home." Wade murmured, scooping the boy up.
He was small and weighed barely anything and Wade easily settled him in his arms, his arm under Peter's ass and his hand cradling his head, holding it to his shoulder.
Peter made a soft sound and pressed closer to him, turning his face to press his nose into Wade's neck. Wade rumbled soothingly and reveled in Peter's answering purr. Natasha just snickered and Wade glared at her.
Wade considered taking Peter back to his dorm, but he felt compelled to bring him back to his apartment. Peter had been there before. Wade always came for him during his heats and brought his heat drunk Omega home. It wasn't all too different this time, though Peter smelled of liquor instead of slick.
Wade kicked the door shut but had to set Peter down before he could lock all of the bolts. Peter whined when he was laid out on the couch and his hand reached out to grab Wade, wanting to be close to his Alpha even in his sleep. Wade just snatched his hand and pressed a kiss to his palm before locking up.
He carried Peter into the closet off of his room. It was large enough to fit both of them comfortably but small enough to feel secure, not only for Peter but for Wade as well. Wade had a hard time letting his guard down, especially when Peter was in heat. The Omega was just so vulnerable and it put Wade on edge. So the enclosed space helped him to settle.
The decision to let Peter suffer through his heats alone these past two months had just about killed Wade. Now he was just happy to have his Omega back in his arms. Peter was limp as Wade stripped him down to only his panties, before laying him down.
Peter sighed, scenting of home and safe when Wade laid him down in his nest.
When Peter stirred he was confused, disoriented and slightly nauseous. His eyes stayed glued shut and he burrowed deeper into the soft blankets and abundance of pillows. His mind felt fuzzy so it took him a moment to process that he was surrounded by the scent of his Alpha and their nest. It took him even longer to realize that the soothing sensation on his head was a hand petting him, lulling him back to sleep.
Peter tried to fight off the feeling but he felt safe and comfortable and the tranquility of the moment pulled him down under. Wade smiled softly at his Omega, nuzzling up against him as his eyes fluttered softly before he fell back to sleep.
It wasn't long though before Peter was waking again, but this time he lurched up to a seated position and scrambled desperately to get out of the nest. Wade tensed, fighting the scent of panic that was triggered by his Omega's distress. It was the scent of sick that made Wade jump up and grab Peter, pulling him out of the closet, settling him on his knees in front of the toilet.
Wade held him around his waist and rubbed his back soothingly as he heaved. Trembling hands reached up to wipe sweaty curls off of his forehead and Wade grabbed one gently and pressed a kiss to Peter's palm. Peter just whimpered pressing further back into Wade, a distressed whine leaving his throat.
"Shh, you're okay. I've got you, princess." Wade soothed, kissing his temple and scooping him off of the floor, flushing the sick away.
Wade held Peter up, one arm under his ass so he could brush his teeth.
"Open up, princess.
Peter opened his mouth obediently, but made no attempt to offer any sort of assistance. Wade was fine with that. Everything inside of him had been screaming at him to help and provide these last few weeks and Wade was finally giving in to the desire. He scented of pleased Alpha, safe and home filling the air as Wade took care of his Omega.
Wade was pretty sure this was the most innocent way he'd ever given Peter that order. Usually their interactions were sexual, rough and rushed. Wade fed his Omega when he was in heat, but it involved a fair amount of kissing and licking fingers and almost always was followed by sex.
This was different. Not necessarily better, but definitely not worse. It was just a different way of providing for his Omega. Wade nuzzled against Peter's cheek, the toothbrush clattering against the ledge of the sink. Peter whimpered and buried his nose in Wade's neck, scenting his Alpha.
Wade wished he had a bath to set his Omega in, but he didn't so a shower would have to do. Peter sobbed when he tried to set him down and Wade couldn't stand the sound. Seeing Peter upset, tears in his eyes and bottom lip trembling was too much for Wade. Not after two months of watching Peter pretend to smile and laugh when Wade could tell he wasn't really happy. It's not that Peter wasn't good at pretending everything was fine, but Wade saw right through the lie.
Wade still wasn't convinced that sticking around was what was best for Peter. Cutting all ties was the best way to keep Peter safe, and yet Wade couldn't do it. There was always the fact that he didn't know how Tiberius had known about Peter. Wade kept telling himself he was only sticking around until he knew Peter was safe, but the truth was that he wasn't sure he could ever really leave Peter.
Wade growled softly, his chest rumbling to soothe his Omega before scooping him back up and pulling his panties down. He propped him on the edge of the sink and Peter made a sound in protest as his bare ass made contact with the cold porcelain. Wade shushed him, tugging the panties down his thighs until they slid down his legs and off his feet.
"Come on, princess, let's get you washed up."
Washing Peter proved to be difficult since he refused to let go of Wade, his limbs wrapped around his Alpha like he'd die if he let go. Or more likely like Wade would slip away.
Wade eventually gave up on any chance of a thorough scrubbing and pulled Peter out of the shower. He didn't even bother trying to dress him, just wrapped him up in a towel and threw some toast in the toaster.
Peter was half asleep again in his arms, but Wade nudged him awake thinking that dry toast would probably settle his tummy. The Omega grumbled unhappily about it, pouting when Wade insisted and bit into the toast.
"There you go, good boy." Wade murmured.
"Wade?" Peter asked hesitantly when his toast was gone.
Peter wanted to ask why Wade left, why he was back, why he waited so long to come back, but he didn't.
"You- why am I here?"
Wade licked his lips and stood up, brushing crumbs off of Peter before carrying him over to the couch. Peter curled up in his lap, his head resting on Wade's chest.
"Do you not want to be here?"
"No, that's not- you know I like being here. It's just that I thought-"
Peter swallowed and shook his head, his curls flying and his teeth biting into his lip.
"Tell me, Pete. What did you think?"
"I thought you left me. I thought you weren't gonna come back."
"I tried to, but I couldn't."
Pain flashed across Peter's face and he flinched away from Wade.
"You wanted to leave me?" Peter asked, his voice breaking.
"Of course I didn't, princess. I could never want to leave you. I should leave though. Staying with you is selfish. I'm a dangerous man and you shouldn't be anywhere near me or my life."
Peter laughed bitterly.
"Selfish?" He asked in disbelief. "Wade if being with me is selfish then I want you to be selfish everyday of your life and if being with you is dangerous then I live for danger."
"Don't say that."
"Why? It's true."
"It's not true and if it is I don't want to hear it."
Peter glared at him.
"You don't want to hear it? You know what Wade? Fuck you. I was miserable. Hell, I'm miserable every time you walk away, because you always walk away. I love you, but half of the time I'm pretty sure I'm just a quick fuck to you."
Wade rolled his eyes, trying not to convey how much it hurt to think about being the cause of Peter's suffering or how much he wanted to tell Peter he loved him.
"There's nothing quick about when I fuck you." Wade said instead.
Peter clenched his fists in Wade's shirt and gritted his teeth together.
"You know what I think the other half of the time? I think that you're afraid of falling in love with me. I also think that you already have and it scares you too much to admit it. You come to me when you know I'm in heat just to whisk me away and have me in your space where you allow me to nest, because you can’t stand the thought of being away from me when my body’s begging for your knot. You sneak into my dorm to see me like you just can't help yourself even though there must be countless other Omegas to fuck-"
"Right? Like every Omega is dying to fuck a scarred Alpha like me?"
"Why wouldn't they?" Peter demanded. "I am.”
Wade growled and slammed their lips together, groping Peter’s ass and grinding into him.
“Fuck, princess, you’re gonna kill me if you keep that up.”
Peter pulled back and whimpered, looking down at his lap.
“Wade, I-” Peter took a deep breath trying to work up the nerve to say what he wanted to say. “I don’t want to just be someone you fuck. I want to be yours. I want you to be my Alpha.”
Wade gritted his teeth, his heart beating rapidly in his chest and his hands sweaty. He wanted to say yes, wanted to tell Peter that he was his and he would never let him go, but he couldn’t. Peter would never be safe as long as Wade was selfish and kept him close and Wade couldn’t lose another mate. He had barely survived the last loss and Peter was just so damn precious, so damn sweet.
“I told you the first time we met that I wasn’t looking for another Omega, Peter. I’m sorry, but I’m not your Alpha and I’m never going to be. I shouldn’t have brought you here and I shouldn’t be sneaking into your dorm, but I’m going to take you back and I’ll keep my distance this time.”
Tears welled up in Peter’s eyes and he clenched his fists, shaking his head.
“No, please, don’t do this. Don’t leave me. I won’t survive without you Wade. I’m lost without you.”
“Hey, no, don’t say that. You’re stronger than that, princess. You don’t need anyone to swoop in and save you, because you can take care of yourself.”
Peter glared at him.
“So what if I can? Maybe I don’t want to. Maybe I just want you to do it for me. There’s nothing wrong with that, with wanting to be taken care of.”
Wade groaned and pulled Peter closer, cradling his head to his chest.
“No, there’s nothing wrong with that, princess.”
Wade knew he should take Peter home, knew he shouldn’t be selfish and hold him close, but that was the problem wasn’t it? Wade was selfish, so selfish that he would endanger his Omega just so that he could have him in his arms.
“Then don’t leave me.”
Wade ran his fingers through Peter’s curls and kissed his temple.
“Shh, I’m not going anywhere.” Wade rumbled and Peter purred in response, nuzzling against him.
Wade held him close, his mind running through all of the options, trying to come up with a way that he could keep Peter without putting him in danger. He determined that his life would always put Peter at risk, but maybe he could prepare Peter, teach him how to protect himself from the evils of his world, and there were many evils in Wade’s world. Peter fell asleep on his lap and Wade scooped him up in his arms, pulling out his phone.
Meet me in the alley.
Natasha was sipping coffee and watching her mate flip pancakes on the stove, anticipating the taste of whipped cream and strawberries on the fluffy cloud like pancakes that Pepper made for her every Sunday morning, when her phone chirped. Natasha glanced down at it and cursed. Pepper glanced back at her, a brow raised in question.
“Wade wants to meet.” Natasha groaned.
“Do you think it’s about Peter?” Pepper asked, sliding the pancake onto a plate.
“It’s always about Peter.” Natasha grumbled.
She slid off of the stool she was perched on, downing the rest of her coffee before placing the mug in the sink. She sent the pancake a longing look before sighing. Pepper smiled and pulled her in for a kiss.
“Go on. I’ll make you a plate when you get back.”
Natasha grinned at her and gave her one more kiss.
Natasha made her way to the agreed upon alley and waited the three minutes that it took for Wade to appear. He dropped down from a fire escape like he usually did, but this time he was cradling Peter to his chest, an arm under his ass and a hand holding Peter’s head securely to his shoulder. The boy was asleep. He made a sound of protest when they landed on the ground, whining and squirming in Wade’s arms.
"Shh, you're okay, princess." Wade murmured in his ear, his chest rumbling soothingly.
Peter sighed, his breath warm on Wade's neck, and settled. Natasha raised a brow at Wade.
"Can I take this to mean you're keeping him then?" Natasha asked, smirking.
Wade rolled his eyes but nodded.
"Turns out I'm selfish, huge surprise I know."
Natasha laughed and leaned back against the brick wall, crossing one foot over the other and pulling a knife out of her jacket to flip idly.
"What do you need, Wade?"
"I need you to keep him safe when I can't."
Natasha paused, grabbing the hilt of her knife and licking her lips.
"What are we supposed to tag team then? Assign shifts so there's always someone watching him?"
"No, just keep an eye out when you're with him."
"I already do."
"Good. Keep doing that then."
Natasha narrowed her eyes at him, before going back to flipping the blade. Wade clearly wanted something, she wasn't going to ask him again though, so he would have to come out and say it. Wade seemed content to run his fingers through Peter's curls, lost in thought.
It was a good twenty minutes before he finally spoke.
"I know we can't always be there to keep him safe, which is why he needs to learn how to defend himself. I would teach him but..."
Natasha nodded in understanding, flipping her knife once more before sliding it back into her jacket. Alpha's were too protective. Wade would never be able to push Peter, he would be soft with the boy, when what he really needed was some firm guidance. Wade may fuck rough, but he'd never be able to raise a hand with the intent of hurting Peter. Natasha did not have the same qualms.
She cared about Peter enough to not seriously hurt him, but she knew that getting knocked on your ass a few times was just a part of the learning process. For some it was a long and miserable part and others, the ones that caught on quickly, only had to hit the ground once or twice. Natasha had been trained as a child, but she had no intention of training Peter with the same cruel methods that had been used on her. That doesn't mean she'd go easy on him though.
"Fine, I'll do it. We'll start with basic hand to hand combat and then move on to weapons."
"Sounds good. I'll drop him off at five."
Natasha rolled her eyes.
"What makes you think I'll be available?"
"Because my Omega's too pretty to deny anything and he'll be there at five."
Natasha shook her head and pushed off of the wall.
"Fine, five. But make sure he wears something he can fight in and don't get all pissy when he comes home with bruises on him."
Pepper asked her what Wade wanted when she came home and Natasha just groaned and curled up on the couch with her head in her Alpha's lap. Pepper didn't press it. She just combed her fingers through Natasha's hair and hummed a tune that was probably some pop song that Natasha would make fun of. Natasha purred softly and Pepper smiled at her.
"Is Peter okay?" Pepper asked after a while.
Natasha blinked her eyes open and glanced up at her. She nodded and snuggled closer, nuzzling into Pepper's crotch and scenting her. Her nose traced the seam of Pepper's shorts and her teeth nipped at the fabric. Pepper just smiled and gripped her hair lightly.
"Settle, love. We will play after I finish my coffee."