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A Blind Bat

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“It’s not like you’re ever really going to leave him anyway.”

Eric rolled his eyes and glanced down at his phone, willing somebody to call so he had an excuse to leave. Bumping into Kristen had seemed like fate and inviting her to lunch had not seemed like the hideous fucking nightmare of an idea it was turning out to be.

So now he was stuck listening to the umpteenth rendition of the ‘you and Vince are codependent/addicted blah,blah,blah’ song.

“It’s so obvious, I don’t know why I didn’t see it before. I mean that house is practically swimming in homoerotic tension.”


It was Kristen’s turn to roll her eyes. “You and Vince are like so clearly in love with each other.”

“What the fuck! Kristen you can’t go around saying things like that. Do you know what would happen to Vince’s career if somebody heard that?”

Kristen flipped her hair over her shoulders in a move he used to find sexy before she decided to destroy his life. “Oh please! I’m not an idiot, Eric and I might still be a little pissed that Vince stole my boyfriend, but I don’t want to hurt him.”

“He did not steal your boyfriend!” Eric looked around but everyone was in their own little world. He lowered his voice and leaned in. “Stop saying shit like that or I swear to God I will sic Ari and Shauna on you!”

Eric was happy to see her blanch at the threat and he tossed down money to pay for the check and left.


“Can you believe she said that shit?”

Drama took a hit of the joint and passed it to Turtle. He shrugged. “First of all, that girl is poison...we’ve been telling you that for months. Secondly it’s not like it’s a lie.”

“The fuck?” Seriously, Eric wondered when he’d entered Bizzarro land where Vince fucking his way through half the women in Hollywood somehow meant he was interested in Eric’s dick.

Turtle snickered. “Come on, E. Everybody can see it.”

“See what?” Vince came in and plopped down on the sofa next to Eric. Eric tried to ignore the way they were plastered against each other, and the fact that it was they way they usually sat.

“That you and E wanna get busy.”

Eric expected Vince to tell his brother to fuck off, or to laugh or anything except the half panic, half longing that crossed his face when he turned to look at Eric.

Vince dropped his eyes and turned back to the guys and then came the laugh and the fuck you’s Eric had been expecting. Only he was too busy flashing on years of signals that he’d clearly missed to notice. Eric thought he knew Vince better than anybody and the fact that he was wrong left a lump in his gut that made him close his eyes. He thought about those signals again and realized he’d been flashing back just as hard. Ari was seriously going to kill them...well him, Ari never believed in killing the golden goose.

He stood up off the sofa and grabbed Vince’s hand. “Come on.”

Vince grinned at him and never hesitated to follow. “Where are we going?”

Eric grinned back at him ridiculously happy for somebody who was in the middle of fucking up his life in spectacular ways. “I have a feeling we’re going to be on TMZ pretty soon. We might as well earn it.”