Actions

Work Header

For Tubbo

Work Text:

Dream’s finally out of the prison. 

 

He takes in a big fresh of air and the rolling flower hills. He’s finally out

 

Somehow through the sheer luck of Tommy being Tommy—messing with the buttons and levers of the prison—and Sam being too caught up in his own guilt and grief that he didn’t even notice when Dream finally slipped through. 

 

Though it did take a while. Sneakily traversing through the labyrinth of the prison. Trying to remember the specific key codes that go through each door. Just doing everything so he wouldn’t alert any of the prison guards of his “escape.” 

 

He leans back at the bark of a tree. With all the free time in the world, of course he planned his escape the moment he knew Tommy would try to visit him again. He already knew the layout of the prison. It was just a matter of getting the warden distracted. Sam’s always been the type of guy to keep all his problems in one area, run from it, and pray that it goes away. But Dream’s not planning to go away anytime soon. 

 

He sighs. He’ll give Sam a good few weeks before he even realizes that Dream is gone. Considering the last time Sam was in his ass full of grief, he didn’t bother visiting or feeding him for 2 fucking weeks

 

But now, he’s finally free. Free to get his revenge and play with Tommy. Starting with Tommy’s other attachment: Tubbo.

 

1.

 

He shivers in his thin prison clothes, wishing he had his cape and green hoodie with him, or even armor. 

 

The snow crunches under him as he lays down on the white patch of ground of Snowchester. 

 

Snowchester. What a quaint place. 

 

With its warm houses, a looming big mansion, and its own man-made nukes. 

Maybe, he can exploit those nukes one day. For now, he needs to get his items considering the only valuable thing on his name is a dirt shack on a flower hill and raw potatoes. Which is honestly a huge downgrade to his status as the god of his own server. Oh, how he craves to see the utter fear etched on everyo- Ok, no. Focus. 

 

From what he can remember from Ranboo’s last visit, Snowchester has a vault specifically holding not only his precious gear and items, but every other valuable that the citizens probably have. He snorts. This is too easy.

 

He doesn't even need to cash in that stupid favor from Techno. 

 

‘That bastard just left me on read the moment I actually needed him, so this plan is going to be so fucking easy.’

 

---

 

Tubbo ran down the long halls of his mansion. He can already feel himself wheezing by the time he pokes his head through the door to a room where he knew his husband would be. “Ranboo?”

 

The enderman hybrid doesn’t even look up as he scratches his pen on his book. “Yeah?”

 

He clutches unto his heart locket, trying to calm down his fast beating heart. “Did you set off the TNT cannons?”

 

Ranboo just let out a hum, calmly closing his memory book as he turned to Tubbo with a pondering look. “I don’t think so. Why?”

 

“Well, I just saw a chunk of our lawn get blown up and the only people that know the code and the existence of a TNT cannon is you and me.” He leans his body on the doorframe, trying to appear menacing with his sweaty face and body. Ender, sometimes he hated this mansion. “And I sure as hell know that it wasn’t me, big guy.”

 

“...Tubbo, you are literally asking the guy that has memory issues here.”

 

“So, it was you!” Tubbo exclaimed, instantly jabbing his finger close to Ranboo’s face. 

 

“I don’t know! I can’t remember!” Ranboo swatted Tubbo’s pointing finger that almost poked his eyes out. 

 

“At least, get your enderman buddies to put dirt on it!” 

 

Ranboo brought a finger to his chin, mock contemplation as he let out a hum, “Nah.”

Tubbo just threw his hands up in mock defeat, redoubling his efforts on poking Ranboo’s face while Ranboo just stood up. A grin stretched on his face when Tubbo’s hands couldn’t even reach his face. Oh, this bastard. 

 

Luckily for Tubbo, he also used his height to his advantage. And started climbing Ranboo like a fucking tree. 

 

“Tubbo, NO-”

 

---

 

Dream sat heavily on his bed. Ash and soot filling up his nostrils as he runs a hand carefully through his singed hair. His equally singed clothes were even fucking falling off. 

 

What the fuck.

 

He lays himself down on the bed, hating how lumpy it is, however it’s luxury compared to his non-existent cot in the prison. 

 

He sighs. He could’ve sworn a pair of heterochronic eyes were staring down at him—almost menacingly before a bomb was thrown at his face. 

 

Fuck, this was not easy. 

 

2.

 

He swipes of the bead of sweat running down from his face. 

 

He raises his pickaxe one more time at the netherrack and still no fucking sign of ancient debris or gold. Ender, Dream hated the nether. 

 

Normally, this would just be a quick trip. An hour or so and then he would have enough for a shiny new armor. But so far, there’s nothing

 

It didn’t help the fact mobs suddenly spawned more around him.

 

Ghasts would suddenly bop into his view and shoot fireballs at him. A sudden horde of hoglins would chase him around. Magma cubes would jump at him at the most inconvenient moment. Piglins would immediately notice he’s not wearing gold and for some fucking reason grabbed the other Piglins attention. If it weren’t for his quick reflexes, he definitely would’ve died. 

 

He takes the small clock from his inventory. Fuck, it’s almost midnight. Maybe, he shoul-

 

“Fuck!” He yelps as he tripped over seemingly nothing. 

Oh, yeah. That’s also been happening to him as well. Tripping over air, making him almost plummet to the depths of lava every goddamn time he’s near on a ledge. 

 

He grumbles, shaking himself and standing up. It’s almost as if someone else is currently with him. Someone invisible. 

 

But honestly at this point, he can’t even see any wisps of the invisibility potion since all he can see is fucking red netherrack and still no sign of fucking anything.

 

Frustration building up, he wildly swings his pickaxe. What he didn’t realize was a zombie pigman coincidentally standing near him, till he heard a loud squelching noise followed by a groan as the thing started attacking him with its sword. He swung his pickaxe back with a surprised yelp, and the zombie pigman vanished in a puff of smoke. 

 

But the damage was already done.

 

Suddenly, he hears an onslaught of loud screeching, grunts, and snorts under the layers of netherrack.

Fuck. 

 

All at once, a horde of zombie pigmen rushed at him in his tiny mineshaft, but he swung his sword anyway. But then another comes at him. Then two. Then three. Till he loses count as he gets swarmed in by the zombie pigman that claws and stabs at him. 

 

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck! 

 

By the time he barely gets back to the overworld in one piece, he doesn’t get a single piece of gold or netherite.

 

---

 

Tubbo usually gets his money and other riches from Ranboo, all he had to do was simply ask and he would suddenly get half a stack of anything by the time Ranboo opens his enderchest. So, imagine his utter shock and amazement when Tommy handed him nearly a stack of gold ingots. 

 

Tubbo shook his head, snapping himself back to reality. “Where did you get so much gold?” 

 

C’mon, this is Tommy we’re talking about. He knows his best friend more than himself, so he knows that Tommy either stole the gold from someone or scammed someone or both

 

Tommy just shrugged, a small smirk on his face. “I went out mining.”

 

Yup, he stole it. 

 

Tubbo just sighs, pocketing the gold in his inventory, “Well thank you, Tommy. I think Michael will appreciate this.”

 

Tommy paused for a moment, his eyebrows furrowed. “Michael? Who’s he?” A gasp tore itself from Tommy, “Your other husband?! Tubbo, what the fu-”

 

“No!” He instantly shouted, shoving his hand to cover Tommy’s mouth before he would spout out some more ridiculous bullshit. “For ender sake, it’s my son.”

 

“...You have a son?” Tommy’s muffled voice said, still covered by Tubbo’s hand. 

 

“Yeah! I mean he’s in the mansion that me and Ranboo commissioned Foolish to make. Oh! Did you know that me and Ranboo actually found him in the nether like on his first few days here, I think. So it’d be-”

 

“I’m leaving.” Tommy taking advantage of the fact Tubbo’s hand lowered to ruffle through his inventory, the blond swiftly ran away. 

 

“Tommy, get back here! I haven’t even shown you the baby pictures yet!”

 

3.

 

The snow under him crunches as he sees a tall hunched figure near Techno’s base. 

 

Oh, perfect. A weak mind. 

 

“Hey!” Dream shouts over, not worried about waking up Phil or Techno considering those two are probably hibernating again. 

 

The tall figure turns to him, a purple hue overtaking his eyes as well as purple particles surrounding the enderman hybrid more frequently than usual. He can see in his large claw hands is a grass block along with other variations of flowers. How cute.

 

“I have something I need you to do,” he almost drawls. Ranoo simply cocked his head at him.  

 

He knows that Ranboo and Tubbo are getting closer, so he might as well exploit that when he can easily use Ranboo to finally kill Tubbo. With that, Tommy will focus all his pent-up anger and kill Ranboo, in turn. And once he does, the server will once again be outraged at Tommy because how dare he kill innocent ‘ol Ranboo . Hah. If things go according to plan, Tommy will turn to him, begging him to bring back Tubbo and he’ll finally have his toy again. 

 

“So I heard that you got married, congrats. Now, I’m sure you already know of your task. Have fun murdering your husband in cold blo-” 

 

A loud screeching noise erupted from Ranboo. In an instant, he drops all of his items on the snow, as he reaches down and pins Dream down, fully on the cold ground. 

 

A distinct snarl is made above him, razor sharp teeth snapping near his face that he has to move his head further into the snow to avoid getting his face removed. The sharp claws fully digging into his flesh that he knows will leave a scar. 

 

“Let me go-” 

 

A screech once again bubbles from the enderman’s throat, stopping Dream from talking. Then since things couldn’t get any better, a claw—equally as sharp as Ranboo’s teeth—came near his face before blacking out. 

 

---

 

Honestly, he doesn’t know he ended up in his mansion. He does remember sleeping in his house near Phil and Techno but that doesn’t make sense to how he ended up here. Sigh, maybe he wrote down something in his memory book...maybe. He takes a sip from his coffee, trying to calm his nerves down. 

 

Then his ears pick up two chatting voices as Tubbo and Tommy enter their kitchen/mini dining room. 

 

Tubbo upon seeing him, beams at him and promptly takes the seat beside him, “Hey Boo, thanks for the flowers. Didn’t know why you had to give it at the crack of morning but I appreciate it, big man.”

 

...Flowers?

 

“Also! You would not believe how ecstatic Michael was when he woke up with gold nuggets around his bed. He was jumping and shit.”

 

Huh. Well then. 

 

“Uh, yeah. So…” Ranboo’s eyes flicker towards Tommy who sat across them. He leans in a bit towards Tubbo, whispering, “Why is Tommy here?”

 

Tubbo just shrugs while Tommy, on the other hand, glares down at Ranboo. He’s been doing that lately. Wonder why .

 

“Oh, I should probably get Michael ready for breakfast.” Tubbo stands up, leaving the kitchen but not before beaming at the both of them, a mischievous glint in his eyes as he says, “Try not to murder each other! If you are, my money is on Tommy.” 

 

Ranboo sighs. Good to know his husband has faith in him. 

 

Tommy coughs, startling Ranboo as he turned his attention to the blonde leaning over, somehow glaring more harshly towards Ranboo. “I don’t know what the fuck is going on with you, but if you try to hurt Tubbo in anyway, I’ll be stealing more than your kneecaps. I know you make Tubbo happy but that doesn’t mean you’re even remotely ok in my book. Not even decent! You’re like this ugly dog that I have to tolerate.” 

 

“...Did I also give you a flower by any chance?” 

 

“...Shut up.” 

 

Ranboo had to cough so he could hide his laughter. Tommy definitely would’ve already jumped him if he even so much as thought that Ranboo was laughing at him. 

 

He takes a sip of his coffee. Truthfully, Ranboo is jealous of Tommy.

 

Not because he knew Tubbo longer or had any material wealth, it’s more or less because he’s a representation of what Ranboo can never be. How Tommy had enough confidence (and not the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair) to stand up against people, to actually unite people with a common goal, and to fight for his beliefs while also having Tubbo by his side, albeit with danger lurking at every corner, but Tubbo always craved chaos and danger. 

 

He sighs, smiling upon seeing Tubbo enter with an energetic Michael in his arms. He knows that Tubbo can have more than one best friend. But he also knows that Tubbo’s first choice will always be Tommy. And nothing's gonna change that. 

 

4.

 

A scent of burning and ash fills his nose, enters down his throat as he watches an ugly small wooden house burn.

 

He pockets his flint and steel, moving farther back as the flame grows bigger and bigger with each howl of wind. “...Stay homeless, bitch.”  

 

Tommy couldn’t even find himself to feel bad. At least, it was an ugly build. Despite being the owner of an entire server, Dream could never manage to build something—at the bare minimum—decent. And he thought his builds were ugly.  

 

The only thing he feels guilty about is the flowers that surrounded the house were catching on fire. He winces as his eye catches something in the wind. He rubs at it but then suddenly notices a moving tall figure. It’s an enderman with a patch of white on his also in the distance with a...flint and steel as well. 

 

He sighs. This is the 2nd time this has happened. 

 

The first time quite frankly was Tommy spying on Dream to find where his base was. He didn’t expect Dream to meet up with an overly tall enderman hybrid near Techno’s base. 

 

Obviously, he immediately thought that the enderman bastard was working with the green homeless man himself. So he was totally shocked but pleased when Ranboo clawed the green bastard’s face, literally rendering Dream unconscious on the snow. He chuckles. Yeah, that was a good one. Although, he was shocked for a moment when Ranboo teleported to him (he didn’t even know Ranboo could do that, what the fu-) and promptly gave him an allium flower before teleporting away once more. 

 

He sighs once again. Making up his mind as he sneakily goes to Ranboo’s hiding spot which cleverly was behind a very thin tree. 

 

“Yo,” he greeted Ranboo and the hybrid immediately jumped from his place, hitting his head on a branch due to how tall he is. Hah. Deserves it for even having the audacity to be taller than Tommy Danger Kraken Innit. 

 

Tommy raises an eyebrow, definitely not worried. “You ok, big man?” 

 

Ranboo winces as he rubs his head. “Yeah, I think so.”

 

“Good- I mean, not good! clearly you’re up to no fucking good, you b est friend stealing bitch. Die .”

 

“...Whatever you say, Tommy.” 

 

Tommy just huffs, walking off as he softly hears Ranboo trailing after him. A slight warmth worms its way in Tommy’s heart. On instinct, he shoves it back to the fucking shadow realm or wherever the fuck Glatt is

 

It’s obvious that Tommy’s jealous of Ranboo, anyone with eyes and half a brain could tell. Not that he would ever admit it to anyone, especially to Tubbo. Ranboo’s just...a person he desperately wanted to be. Not only is the tall bastard rich and can hold himself in a fight but he somehow gets along with everyone, manages to be on good terms with fucking Techno and Phil, and isn’t involved with any conflict whatseover. The best part is that Ranboo’s able to actually keep Tubbo safe. Something that Tommy’s been trying to achieve ever since he joined Wilbur to fight for L’manburg. 

 

He sighs, exhaustion weighing down his bones. When Tommy’s gone, at least he’s sure that Ranboo will be there to protect Tubbo. And that’s good enough for him. 

 

---

 

...Waking up to his house as well as his other valuables completely vanished with no trace whatsoever wasn’t the best experience he has ever woken up to, but it’s definitely something.  

 

Dream decides to go back to sleep anyway. 

 

5.

 

Dream tugs at the hood of his ragged cloak. Glaring directly at the goat hybrid as he fawns over the bees that landed on him. 

 

Ok, today is the fucking day that he's gonna kill Tubbo. He’ll make sure of it. 

 

He heaves his axe on his shoulder, quietly lurks towards Tubbo till he’s close enough to kill him with one swing of an axe. 

 

He couldn’t help the maniac grin that spread on his face. Oh, he’s gonna enjoy hearing the guttural scream of Tommy and Ranboo seeing their best friend bleeding on the very prime path he built. 

 

So, he raises his axe. He can already feel the chaos and destruction on this server.  

 

---

 

They notice Dream before he could even get close to Tubbo.

 

Tommy looks at Ranboo and nods. Ranboo returns a nod, already understanding what to do. And so, Tommy with no hesitation, bodies Dream slamming him to the ground as he starts kicking the absolute shit out of Dream. Of course, Ranboo, the ever logical thinker and holder of brain cells, promptly kicked the shit out of the green bastard all while Tubbo was distracted with one of the bees from the Bee ‘n Boo hotel.

 

“...What are you guys doing?”

 

Ranboo froze, slowly turning back but not without giving Dream one last final kick. “...Nothing.”

 

“Is that-”

 

“Anyways!” Tommy loudly exclaimed, dumping dirt on top of Dream’s unconscious form as if his feet and hands aren’t sticking out from dirt man there. “The BigInnit Hotel is definitely gonna crush your tiny hotel.”

 

Tubbo huffs, “First off, it’s a motel. And second! You’re still gonna visit Michael right?”

 

Ranboo lets out a sigh of relief. For once, he’s glad that Tubbo is so easily distracted. 

 

Tommy glances towards Ranboo, mischief glinting in his eyes. “Of course. I’ll be like the best uncle he’s ever gonna have that he’s probably gonna forget Ranboob here.”

 

The enderman hybrid chuckles, “Oh, he won’t forget me.”

 

“Let’s hope then that Michael didn’t inherit your memory loss,” Tommy said, a smug smirk on his face. 

 

Ranboo smiles. “Don’t worry, he’s probably gonna inherit my vast amount of wealth.” 

 

Immediately, they were in a staring match—well, it’s more of a glaring match—and Ranboo felt smug for once for his height as he stared down at Tommy’s red angry face. 

 

“...I’m not liking the energy in this room so I’m just gonna go check up on Michael.” 

 

“Tubbo, it’s not yet our brea- And he’s gone,” Ranboo sighs as he stares at the empty spot of where his husband used to be. 

 

He glances again towards Tommy. An awkward air tenses around them as Tubbo wasn’t there to buffer it. 

 

“So…” Ranboo drawls. “How’s the hote-”

 

“I think Sam Nook is calling. See ya later, boob boy!” 

 

And, Tommy’s gone as well. Great. Maybe he should just head over to Michael. Yeah, Michael’s awesome compared to everyone else on this godforsaken server. 

 

---

 

“Say fuck,” Tommy excitedly whispers as Michael tightly grabs unto his hair. 

 

Tubbo groans, already whisking Michael in his arms, as far away from Tommy’s diabolical hold. “Tommy, I love you like a brother and all, but I will not allow my son’s first word to be fuck.”

 

The zombified piglin let out a squeak, making grabby hands towards Tommy (or more specifically his hair). “Fu-fuk?” 

 

Both Tommy and Tubbo froze. 

 

The blonde shrugs. “Whoops?” 

 

“...Start counting your days, Tommy.” 

 

“...Fuck.” 

 

Michael excitedly claps his hands. “Fuk!” 

 

“Michael NO-” 

 

-

 

Tommy’s sat on the floor, waving a finger towards Michael’s—well, dead side. Almost decaying at the very seams but somehow the kid’s just vibing

 

“Hey, you’re just like me.” 

 

Bundled up in a baby blue sweater, Michael lets out a few oinks and snorts as he tries catching Tommy’s finger with his tiny hooves. 

 

“Thank you. You’re not so shabby looking yourself. Women are gonna be all over you. Though you do have Tubbo’s puppy eyes.”

 

Oinks.

 

“No way.”

 

Snorts and huffs. 

 

Tommy gasped, “You’re kidding me. They did just not-” 

 

Ranboo couldn’t help but lean in, at awe at the whole debacle of Tommy basically talking civilly for once. “Does he actually understand Michael?”

 

“I honestly don’t know.” Tubbo shrugs, his face absolutely blank as he slowly brings out a camera. “But I am taking a picture of every moment, so I can have blackmail.” 

 

Ranboo couldn’t help but shudder, knowing how ruthless Tubbo could be. “You evil, evil man.”

 

Tubbo’s already clicking away at hyper speed. “Sorry, can’t hear you over the clicking of my camera.”

 

-

 

Tubbo quietly peeks in Michael’s playroom. Normally, everything would be neat and tidy but not when Tommy’s visiting. Toys were strewn everywhere. Books were stacked on top of each other till it almost reached the ceiling. The play mats and carpet were practically ripped off from the floor. And, in the middle of everything is Tommy and Michael. 

 

Tommy lets out dramatic groans and other pain sounds as he flops on the ground. Michael, on the other hand, was having the time of his life, letting out excited squeals and oinks as he whacks Tommy with a styrofoam sword.

 

“Oh no! The mighty hero has vanquished me ! My army attack!”

 

Tommy’s hand inches towards the fallen stuffed toys near them and tickles Michael with it that his son falls back on the mats, trying to push away the stuffed toy as he giggles and snorts. 

 

Tubbo couldn’t help the aww practically clawing at his throat. The sight almost brought a tear to his eyes. Almost. 

 

Then, his best friend freezes in his tickle attack, slowly turning his head. “...I am willing to give you all the profit that the hotel made from this week if you don’t mention this to anyone.”

 

Tubbo just smiles then fucking ran for it. 

 

The goat hybrid can faintly hear Tommy’s screeching, “You bitch!” And already was out of the room with a clapping Michael on his back. 

 

Tubbo ran faster. Laughter and wheezing filling up the mansion.  

 

-

 

He lets out a sigh, watches as the snowflakes quietly fall on the lush garden that Tubbo somehow managed to keep it in a vibrant shape despite the snowy weather of Snowchester. 

 

Tommy at the corner of his eyes, sees someone sitting right beside him. He doesn’t even need to actually look to see that ugly stupid smile on the enderman hybrid’s face. 

 

“Hey,” Ranboo starts slowly, “Michael really likes you.”

 

The blonde forces himself to stay silent, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of actually responding. Maybe, if he stays quiet for long enough, Ranboo will just leave an-

 

“I haven’t seen Tubbo this happy sinc-”

 

“I hate you,” Tommy blurts out. His hand immediately slaps towards his mouth. Shocked that those words even escaped the very crevices of his throat.  

 

Yet, Ranboo, instead of getting pissed or mad or shouting for Tommy to get the fuck out , he looks sad. Pity in his eyes and that made Tommy angrier

 

His hands curl into a tight fist, nails digging into the meat of his palm. “I hate you,” he firmly says once more, looking around the mansion that Tubbo and Ranboo bought together . “You easily agree to my plan to prank George’s dumb mushroom house. You’re insanely nice, great at PVP, and fucking rich...I don’t get it.” A bitter chuckle tore itself from Tommy’s parched throat. “You’re married to my best friend, in good terms with Techno and Phil. Hell! People treat you like a human being. Something I can’t have...even if I prove myself... I-”

 

“Tommy, you’re,” Ranboo interrupts him, a hand reaching towards his face, “You’re crying.”

 

His hand immediately flies to his wet face. Fuck. He roughly wipes his face with the green bandana he always wears, glowering at Ranboo. “No I’m fucking not.”

 

The hybrid lets out a sigh, exhaustion written all over his face and in the very crevices of his scar (wait, did Ranboo always have a scar-). “Look, I can never understand all the crap you’ve gone through, all the wars, the betrayals, the loss, but I get it. I get your frustration, your anger towards me. I understand...But nothing ever changed between you and Tubbo.”

 

Tommy scoffs.  

 

But Ranboo, for once, had a determined look on his face. Maybe, because of the mere mention of Tubbo. Yeah, most likely. So, he continues on, “He cares about you, a lot. He’s a selfless idiot that’s willing to sacrifice his life just so everyone he ever loved can be happy. And I know that you know that. ‘Cause he’s your best friend.” 

 

Something in Tommy’s chest collapses, falling on top of each other as his vision blurs with...more tears. Fuck. He wipes it again, more harshly than the last time. He takes a deep breath. “...Y’know you shouldn’t insult your husband like that. Considering he can nuke you if he wanted.” 

 

Thankfully, Ranboo didn’t point out more of the fucking tears as he just chuckles. “Yeah...I know.” His face softens even more, fondness so evident in his eyes as he smiles towards the mansion, towards Tubbo and Michael. “Let’s work together to defeat Dream, just for him. Alright?” 

 

Ranboo reaches for one of his pockets, pulling out an allium flower, just like those many nights and months ago. “Here, have a flower,” he sheepishly says, “Since you burnt the last one.” 

 

Hesitantly, he takes the flower. Carefully cradling it, in fear of burning it again. He’ll never admit to being a flower boy but...he’ll do anything for Tubbo. 

 

Tommy sighs, letting a small smile creep on his face. “Yeah, you’re right. For Tubbo.” 

 

Suddenly, they hear the bushes rustling. In an instant, they already had their weapon out. What or who could- Has Dream been...Oh, fuck no. 

 

Ranboo lets out a low growl, his height growing a bit taller as they were on the same thought process. Tommy just tightens his grip on the Axe of Peace. But before they could once again start swinging their sword and axe towards the possible Dream in the bush, a light catches Tommy’s eyes blinding him. 

 

He lets out a quiet curse, rubbing at it but notices a horn poking at. Specifically a set of horns with a ring on top of one. Wait a fucking min-

 

“Tubbo? What the fuck, man. You spying on us?!” Tommy practically screeches. 

 

Tubbo’s head finally popped out of the bush, leaves covering his head. “Well-”

 

“Tubbo, that’s not nice.” Ranboo crosses his arms. 

 

“I was just-” 

 

Tommy lets out a triumphant laugh, a brilliant idea already forming. “You can’t blackmail me anymore, bitch! I got your husband to give me gold and diamond blocks.”

 

Instantly, a confused look got painted on Ranboo’s face. “I never agre-”

 

Tuggo gasps, tears already forming on his eyes. “Ranboo, you’re cheating on me?!”

 

“What, no!”

 

The blonde simply gave a blank look towards his best friend. “Tubbo, I would rather experience hell again than marry someone with boob in their name.”

 

Ranboo lets out a groan, “Once again, my name doesn’t have that.” 

 

“What? Sorry, couldn’t hear you clearly, Ranboob.”

 

“Why are you like thi-”

 

+1

 

Tubbo harshly presses his boot down on Dream’s neck. Choking out any possible sound the bastard can make. 

 

He leans down, knowing that his two best friends were too preoccupied with screaming at each other to notice him again.  “Now, I’m usually forgiving for most things, Dream...but you’ve committed the worst possible mistake when you decided on hurting my family again.”

 

Dream’s ugly green eyes glared at him, but didn’t make any sounds as he put more pressure on his leg. Dream’s face is turning more and more blue than red.

 

The goat hybrid just hums. “I’m only giving you ten counts before I chase you down with my axe and nukes.”

 

Tubbo then lifts his foot, letting Dream gasp and wheeze as he clutches at bruised throat. With one last final glare, Dream runs off submerging himself in the spruce trees. He’ll find Dream soon anyway. 

 

So, Tubbo finally steps out of the bush as Tommy and Ranboo were still in a fighting match but quickly their attention turns to him as Tommy widely waves and calls for him while Ranboo just smiles. Tubbo beams at them. Today’s a good day.