When the parasite had entered the manor, no one had known it’s true nature.
A man in a red poncho, frown on his face, had entered the manor- a new survivor, come to join the game.
But soon, like a plague, his influence had spread farther and farther, until even Helena and Emma were throwing slurs at each other like some sort of extreme rap battle. (Without the coherency or the rhyming of an *actual* rap battle, because rich kids don’t know how to write words. That’s just how it works guys trust me)
Naib Subpar had been the first of the infected, but like the trope-ridden bitch he was, he’d refused to tell anyone until he’d infected Martha and Norton, and then onward the disease spread, and then onward to Mike and other survivors who we care less about.
Naib, being the first one to be turned, was turned first- the others only discovering his fate when his armpads were found infected with dozens of little Edgars, and the original Edgar and the Edgar Two Electric Boogaloo were found fighting to the death to be the superior Edgar. (Nobody was sure who won, mostly because they were exactly the same)
Aesop and Andrew were infected trying to bury the Weaker Edgar, Aesop being turned quicker then most due to the fact Edgar and Aesop both changed their names to someone famous who made art or something
Then Andrew hit him over the head with his shovel because That One Trope Where You Kill People
“OW, MY FLESH” Mike cried out being attacked by Ann’s cat, leading him to emit more Edgars and complete his transformation into Yet Another Edgar what a plot twist this is
“Look at me I’m Edgar I’m rich fuck you” mike said proceeding to call everyone slurs
Norton managed to No U the Edgar Curse Onto uh... what’s a character... UM. PATRICIA. She then died
Luca then fucking left the manor because actually fuck you.
Tracy then began the mechanical uprising to end the chaos but then Andrew decided to do a callback to that one time he murdered a guy and murdered another guy, aka Tracy
“I would be scared of the fact Andrew’s murdering people but that’s OOC since I’m Edgar now,” mike said, eating a microphone
“Now he has to point at someone and say S L U R S “ Patricia said, oh wait I forgot she’s dead Nvm. It was Vera I guess
“I’m an Edgar fucker” says Luca who left the manor, returning the manor and immediately dying because Edgar did not want to be fucked
“Wait do you mean returning to the manor?” Said one of the Edgars, and then the narrator struck them down
“We don’t need a forth wall anyway stupid bitch” another Edgar said, but the narrator was lazy and decided to just have joseph kill him. So Joseph killed him
It was very angsty
Then Wick turned into an Edgar which made Victor die on the spot because that’s an abomination, also hahe you ever watched that one alchemy thing? Y’know the anime. Fullmetal alchemist. I have not watched it but I assume someone reading this has
“Wait reading what? A fucking book?! That’s lame”
Andrew said dying because I didn’t want him to kill anyone else in the plot because that’s two characters now
Murro seemed complete indifferent because he ate dirt as a kid and was immune to the Edgar disease
Lucky guy isn’t real so he can’t be in this story, sorry guys :((((
Ganji revealed his true form as Bat Man, aka the Man Of Bats, and then sucker punched Yihdra. Yihdra then thanos snapped him and everyone else in this fucking story. It’s over go home
And then Orpheus found the manor 200000000 years later and got the Edgar disease and then everyone on the planet died from Edgar disease. Fuck you fucj you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck y