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A Secret Ruination

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Second Lieutenant Hanazawa Yuusaku sure is our lucky charm.

Handsome countenance, proper manners, good grades…

Very handsome.

But we mustn’t touch him. No good luck from him if he’s not a virgin.

Then it’s agreed. We will all keep him pure.



The wildcat on the other hand…

… is just a wildcat.

No need to be gentle.

If you flip him over and not look at his face, doesn’t he look a lot like his little brother?




They seemed to be exceptionally carried away this evening, thought Ogata as his stared blearily at the weeds growing along the alley walls, waiting for the fourth man to finish his business. A dribble of blood pulled on his skin where they had bashed his head against the walls.

Walking might be a problem tomorrow. And where did they throw his tunic this time?

He felt the damp body behind him shudder, then a warm sticky stream running out of him.

“Are you done? Let me have another go.”

“You sure?” The man laughed, slapping him like one would a prized mare. “I probably stretched him out too—”

“Someone’s coming!”

The man behind him pulled out so hard he flinched. As the gang scampered away down the alley between warehouses, Ogata’s knees finally gave out. At least his face landed on an unstained patch of grass. He winced against the flickering gas lamps outside the alley.

“Hello? Is someone there?”

Ah, what a nasty surprise. For him.

The voice came closer, then Yuusaku’s silhouette outside the alley, holding his tunic and casting a long shadow across his face.

“Hello? You I think you dropped—”

Lying on his side, he met Yuusaku’s eyes as placidly as he could with trousers around his ankles and cum seeping out his ass.


He dropped the tunic and dashed over, kneeling over him with wide eyes and shaking hands.

“What… what happened? Brother! Are you alright?”

Hmm. Would I have to explain to this him?

He sat up, letting Yuusaku’s gaze to slowly, reluctantly slide down from his bleeding temple to his bare legs. Yuusaku dropped his gaze and growled:

“Who did this!?”

There we go.

He didn’t answer, letting the fading footsteps behind him do the talking.

Ogata watched with mild fascination as rage descended on Yuusaku’s always gentle face. He had to yanked Yuusaku back by the wrist before he could chase after them.

“Sir, do you want the whole division to know what they did to me?”

“I can’t let them get away with this!”

“If this gets out, it’ll only attract others who’d also like to… try me.”


“We’ll probably ship out soon, let it go.”

Yuusaku looked away, still fuming, but didn’t break free of his grip. Ogata contemplated his heaving shoulders, then spat out the leftover cum in his mouth.

“Can you hand me my tunic, sir?”

He watched Yuusaku slump, dusting off his tunic and carefully pulling it over his shoulders. Against the light outside, Ogata could see the rage drain away from his face, leaving behind only grief and regret. That was when he finally understood.

To think that this is your weakness, Yuusaku. What a shame.

“Sir… keep this a secret for me, please?”






Yuusaku trailed him like a bloodhound in the days that follow, as if that would ward off whatever evil threatening to befall him. His demeanor shifted as well, though perhaps too slight for others to notice. He was more guarded, cautious, trying to decide whether the person in front of him is responsible.

Bless that simple brain, working so hard.

“Brother, why wouldn’t you tell me who they are?”

“Will you kill them for me if I do, sir?”

Yuusaku bit his lip and didn’t answer, looking particularly miserable. Ogata had to look away less he be caught smiling.

Don’t look so sad, or I’ll be tempted to make you watch me get hurt again.

The person he is facing now, however, is someone that demands all his self-control.

“How have you been, Superior Private Ogata?” He and Tsurumi stood side by side on the small hill overlooking the drill court below, humming with activity.

“Not much.”

“Relish this laidback life, for war will be upon us soon.”

Laidback indeed. As the intelligence office, nothing escapes him. No chance he was unaware of how the Wildcat of the Seventh gets put to use. Wouldn’t surprise Ogata if it turns out he had a hand in it to begin with.

“I noticed your brother has been very attached to you recently, more than usual, that is. Any progress?”

Here it comes.

“He has been… unsettled recently.”

“How so?”

Must be careful with this wily man…

“Probably the impending war. Finally realizing he’s not likely to make it out alive.”

… for there are some things…

“That’s surprising. He doesn’t come off to me as someone who would succumb to such anxiety.”

… that are only for me …

“So much for noble blood, I suppose.”

… to toy with, and you can fuck right off.

“Might be an opening for you finally. Make good use of this development, Superior Private Ogata.”

He carefully schooled his face blank.

“I’ll do my best.”






“Aren’t you hard to find these days, Wildcat.”

Ogata rolled his eyes internally and externally, couldn’t even bother stopping on his way to the quartermaster.

Nishimura gripped his arm. “Still in the bad habit of wandering alone though.”

Crowds make for too much stupid in one place.

“Always hanging out with your brother these days. Taking care of him with your ass as well?”

“So insatiable that you’d risk ruining our good luck? Bad form, Ogata.”

“We’ll fix that for you though.”

The gang jeered, dragging him towards the warehouse.


Ogata looked back, spotting Tanigaki standing stiffly around the corner. The crowd around him quieted down.

Is the matagi going to look the other way, or join the party?

The big man shuffled uncomfortably, then muttered: “Um… Second Lieutenant Hanazawa is looking for you, Superior Private Ogata.”

Good script, bad delivery.

Nishimura and his pack glanced at each other, then let him go. Ogata straighten his uniform and walk towards Tanigaki.

“Well, next time, I guess.”

They walked away from the warehouses side by side, the damp, frigid winds dispersing their breaths.

“I thought Second Lieutenant Hanazawa is still at a meeting with the platoon commander, no?”

The big man quietly turned red, vaguely reminiscent of Yuusaku.

“Bad things happen to those who speak up too often. Don’t’ make it a habit, matagi.”

Tanigaki growled. “Bad things happen to chicken shits.”

Correction. They are the same. You should be Yuusaku’s brother, not me.

They reached the platoon commander’s building. Ogata glanced back, making sure the gang hadn’t followed them. Guess the quartermaster would have to wait.



“Don’t take shortcuts again. I’m off patrol duty starting tomorrow.”

Ogata laughed, patting Tanigaki on the chest as he turns around to leave.

“My options to thank you are limited, but if I ever had to kill you, I’ll make sure you won’t need a second shot.”

“You’re awful, you know that?”






“Those staying on base for the leave, report here at seven-hundred tomorrow. The rest of you can leave at eighteen hundred tonight. Dismissed.”

Tsukishima put away the leave roster as the Twenty-Seventh began milling towards the exit, murmuring their leave plans in low but excited voices.

My own plans, on the other hand, is still one person short…

An arm snaked across his shoulders. “Got everything planned for you tonight, Wildcat.”

Wasn’t referring to you.

“Does it involve using you for target practice? You shouldn’t have.”

Fingers dug into his shoulder. “I’ll shut your whore mouth—”


The body plastered against him froze, then peeled away to turn around.

“Sergeant Tsukishima.”

Tsukishima held out a file at him without looking up. “Take the leave roster to the base commander’s office.”

Nishimura took the file and scurried off. Ogata stood there, waiting to meet Tsukishima’s eyes.

Don’t be shy.

Realizing Ogata wasn’t going to budge, Tsukishima gave up shuffling papers and looked up. “Problem, Superior Private Ogata?”

“Nothing, I’m just impressed by what a reliable officer Sergeant Tsukishima is. No wonder First Lieutenant Tsurumi trusts you.”

Tsukishima looked away, face stormier than usual. “Bugger off, Ogata.”

Ogata saluted with a smile and left. Feeling guilty that Tsurumi left me to dogs and did nothing? Guilt, such a futile sentiment.

He headed towards the officers’ compounds, the base around him humming with the prospect of a two-day block leave.

Or perhaps Tsukishima finds the saying “the child of a wildcat is still a wildcat” too similar to “the child of a murder is still a murder”?

Yuusaku spotted him while mid-conversation with other officers. He quickly begged off and scampered towards him.

“Happy Tenchō-setsu, brother!”

“Thank you, sir. Will you be leaving the base soon as well?”

“Yes! Sapporo Theatre is in town, let’s go together!”

Ogata lowered his head. “I’m staying on base this time, sir. Why don’t you go ahead with the other officers.”

“What? Are you not leaving the base at all, brother?”

Ogata glanced at his disappointed face, then whispered: “Soldiers off-based on a two-day leave tend to become… uninhibited. I’m safer staying behind.”

Silence descended between them. Yuusaku held his hand in a tight grip, looking absolutely gutted.

“Then… then let me stay with you, brother! The Sapporo Theatre comes to Asahikawa ever year anyways!”

“Sir, you don’t have to—”

“We so rarely get to spend time alone anyways. Let me go update my leave schedule right now!”

He dashed off, leaving Ogata to stare at his receding back, his hand still hovering mid-air where Yuusaku had held it.

Guilt, so futile, so versatile.






The waxing gibbous moon hurried after the setting sun, leaving behind a night sky loaded with stars. The Weaver Star hung low on the horizon, the hallmark of colder days to come.

The two of them strolled along the perimeters of the rifle range, the snow luminous around them. A row of pale birches shattered the snow-light over them.

The roasted sweet potato Yuusaku fetched from the kitchen sat heavy and warm in his pocket.

“Your hands are always cold. This should make it better.”

They had nothing in common, not even common memories, yet Yuusaku could always find one more thing to talk about.

Brother, did you hunt a lot growing up?

The last marksmanship competition of the Seventh Division, brother was incredible!

Have you had snow geese before? The big ones are tough, but the young ones are delicious.

If we ever go to Sapporo, let me take you to the Hōheikan.

I heard the Kairakuen in Ibaraki is beautiful, have you been?

Plum blossoms must be spectacular down south.

Brother, when this is all over, can you take me with you to Ibaraki?

Ogata buried his face into the collars of his winter coat, watching their boots tread into virgin snow. Is this what brothers talk about? Does he not talk about the same things with other officers?

Must it be me?

“Brother, are you scared?”

“Of what?”

“The war?”

“As the flag bearer, shouldn’t you be the nervous one, sir?”

Like a child, Yuusaku jumped onto a boulder by the trail. “It doesn’t feel real.”

“Do you want to feel scared?”

“It feels… disrespectful if I don’t.”

Another sentiment completely incomprehensible to Ogata. 

How do you even live like this, Yuusaku?

“Oh darn.” Yuusaku fished out the sweet potato in his pocket. “I forgot to eat it. Now it’s cold.”

“It was meant to be a hand warmer anyways.”

“It felt like a shame to eat it when it was still hot, but now it feels like a shame to have let it go cold.”

“Then you must eat it at exactly the right moment.”

Yuusaku shoved the sweet potato back into his pocket, smiling. “That right moment would only last a split second.”

“Then sir must be very precise.”

Yuusaku giggled, his cheeks red in the cold air. “Only brother can manage that kind of precision.”

Ogata looked up at the boy, trying to picture him in the middle of carnage and destruction.

“There are other ways if such precision cannot be achieved.” He turned around and headed back. “For example, we can toss the sweet potatoes back into the pot when the mess staff is looking the other way.”

Yuusaku jumped down, laughing and chasing after him.

“No, brother! We can’t! We’ll get in trouble!”






They ended up by the barracks after losing count how many laps they took around the base. The buildings were dark, with only a scattering of windows still lit.

Ogata approached a lighted pane, carefully glancing in. A few soldiers taking leave on base had gathered to play cards, drinking from canteens that likely held anything but water.

“Brother, are you ready to turn in?”

He backed away into the shadow, leaning against the wall. “I… I’ll go in when they’re finish. You go head, sir.”

Yuusaku peered at him, then at the people inside the window. As if having made up his mind, he took Ogata’s hand into a firm grip.

“Sleep with me tonight, brother.”

Ogata’s eyes shot up at him, then hurriedly looked away. “Sir… that would be inappropriate.”

“Has nothing to do with propriety.” He pulled Ogata away resolutely. “You’ve always took care of me. We’re brothers after all, you wouldn’t mind, would you?”

Ogata kept his head lowered, allowing Yuusaku to lead him towards the officers’ compound as he stared at their clasped hands.

“If it’s you, sir, no… I don’t mind.”

Inside the darkened building, Yuusaku carefully guided him along, ready to shield him should they run into anyone. Unlike the regular dorms, the officers’ single rooms were fitted with shoji doors, each faintly aglow with dim blue light.

“Here. Hurry.”

Yuusaku’s four-and-a-half tatami room was lit up by starlight from the window, a small vase holding a pine branch sat atop a large wooden cabinet, casting twisted shadows onto the wall.

Ogata breathed in.

Campfire. Rice fields after a storm. Swan feathers freshly plucked.

“Good thing everyone is off-based.” Yuusaku let out a sigh as he took off his peaked cap. “Give me your coat, brother.”

He stared at Yuusaku stiffly.

“What’s wrong?”

Ogata shook his head, taking off his snow-flecked coat.

“Are you still cold? Hold on.” Yuusaku hung up their coats, then went to add more coals into the clay brazier. “I only have one set of bedding, but we’ll make do.”

“Does sir want me to take off my clothes?” He asked hollowly.

Yuusaku blanked, arms around the futon half dragged out from the closet. Then he dropped it to crawl toward the cabinet, rummaging out a yukata.

“Here, you can wear this, though it’s probably a bit large.”

Ogata took it, then slowly shed his shirt and trousers, eyes never leaving Yuusaku as he busied with the bedding.

“There,” he patted the pillow. “Come on in before you catch a cold.”

Yuusaku looked up to see him rooted on the spot, then laughed as he went up to close the lapels of his yukata. “It really is too big on you.”

He pulled Ogata to sit down on the futon, then started to battle the top button of his own tunic.

“No one makes the rounds here in the morning, so we can sleep in if—”

Ogata gently pushed away his hands, unbuttoning his collar for him.

Yuusaku turned red. “Um… thank you.”

Ogata didn’t answer, pushing the tunic off his shoulders and laying it carefully on the side. When he reached for his shirt buttons as well, Yuusaku hurriedly grabbed his hands.

“That’s… that’s not necessary, brother.”

Ogata stared at his flushed cheeks in the dark, slowly dropping his hands.

Then he draped himself over Yuusaku’s lap to unbuckle his belt.


Ogata pulled his penis out and Yuusaku just managed to grab him by the shoulders before he could wrap his mouth around it.

“Wait! What? Brother…! No, not this…!”

Ogata looked up, confused.

“Not this…? Oh, does sir want to use my hole instead?”

He leaned back, spreading his legs and reaching a hand between them, teasing the tight ring. “I don’t mind. You’re big, but I know you’ll be gentle, just let me—”

“Brother, stop! Don’t… don’t!” Yuusaku grabbed his wrist, covering his own face with the other hand. “Why are you like this all of a sudden?”

Looking slightly shaken, Ogata asked carefully. “What would sir prefer to do instead?”

“Nothing! I don’t mean it like that!”

“… sir said you wanted to sleep with me, for me to take care of you…?”

“No! Not like that! You misunderstood!”

Confusion gradually turned into horror on Ogata’s face.

“Did sir only want… you didn’t mean…”

“Of course! How could I possibly want that from you!”

Ogata flinched back as if slapped.

“Of… of course…” He pulled his yukata together with shaking fingers. “Of course sir wouldn’t… wouldn’t want to touch something so soiled. I’m very sorry…”

“No! Brother, that’s not what I mean!”

Ogata twisted free of his grip, scrambling to grab his folded uniform. “How could I think… must have been used too many times, even my mind is dirty…”

Ogata reached for the door, still in yukata, and Yuusaku lunged to hold him back with a both arms.

“Brother is not dirty!”

He gritted his teeth, prying at Yuusaku’s arms. “Please let go, sir. It’ll do a number on your reputation if people see the Wildcat in your room.”

“Brother, please listen!” Yuusaku pressed his face into his back. “Brother is not dirty at all! It’s just… that kind of thing… it’s meant to be done between people who love each other, isn’t it! Don’t throw it away so easily, brother!”

“Love each other?” His voice cracking on a laugh. “That is no longer possible for me.”


He gave up struggling, letting his uniform slide to the floor. “How cruel would it be, to ask a girl to touch something as tainted as this body.”

Yuusaku’s whimper burned along his neck. “No, one day brother will surely find—”

“Someone who doesn’t think me dirty?” He sagged in Yuusaku’s arms, all the fight gone. “There is only you, sir.”

For a long moment, the room echoed only with their heavy breaths and the soft chatter of the coals in the brazier.

“Sir, you should let me go.”

“Never.” Yuusaku tighten his arms obstinately.

He struggled to turn around in his arms, staring at Yuusaku’s chest. “Sir, you’ve done enough for me—”

“And I will do more.” Yuusaku cut him off without hesitation.

“Don’t promise me something… that’ll make me want rely on you.”

“If only brother would rely on me more.”

He pressed his forehead into Yuusaku’s chest, watching heartbeats race underneath the thin shirt. Ogata slowly took hold of the hem of that shirt, then whispered in an almost inaudible voice:

“Sir, just once…”

Yuusaku pulled back, meeting a pair of eyes with the look of a caged beast ready to risk everything.

“… show me what those who love each other do.”

He looked away from Yuusaku’s heartbroken face and stammered on. “Because… there is only you. I know you must remain a virgin, but… but I’m a man, so I wouldn’t count, right?”

Tears pattered onto the back of his hand, still holding onto his shirt. “Brother…”

Ogata pushed on like a man possessed. “That’s right, when sir meets the girl he loves one day, then that will be your first time. I wouldn’t count. Just… think of it as practice…for when you meet her…”

The Yuusaku arms shook with his sobs. “Brother, no…”

“If looking at my face puts you off, sir, I… I can turn around. I can be very quiet—”

He pressed Ogata against him, almost violently, as if that will stop all the words. “Why would I not want to look at brother’s face…”

Ogata leaned his cheek against those shaking shoulders, staring blankly at the window behind them, filled with stars.

“Yuusaku, when you said you wanted to sleep with me, I was glad…”

He twisted the hem of that shirt, like one would a bayonet as it sinks into flesh.

“… because that means even someone like me can know this.”

Yuusaku held his face with both hands, pressing their foreheads together, wet lashes brushing against Ogata’s.

“And I am glad brother would rely on me.”

Hold me…

Ogata watched the hesitation drain from that face, inches from him, and smiled.

… and jump off this cliff with me.






It took Yuusaku bumping their nose together, then blushing, for Ogata to catch the drift.

Right, that’s something normal people do, isn’t it.

He tilted his head, wrapping both arms around Yuusaku’s shoulders, letting him regroup to try again. When their lips touched, a low grumble vibrated in Yuusaku’s chest. He dutifully echoed with a moan.

Yes, you will turn out just like them.

When they parted, Yuusaku gasped like he had ran a mile. He clumsily caressed Ogata shoulders, biting his own lip before asking.

“Can I… can I touch your body, brother?”

Ogata bared his neck like a defeated prey, letting his yukata slide to his waist. Yuusaku’s fingertips hesitantly glided from his collarbones to his sternum. He splayed his palms across his ribs, then circled the heart beat inside to land at the small of his back.

“Brother’s body is… so beautiful.” He then flushed and grinned at the same time for saying something so sappy. This time when Ogata undressed him, he meekly cooperated, the flush on his face crawling down to his chest.

“Brother, you said… um… hole… does it not hurt?”

He picked up Yuusaku’s hand. “If Yuusaku is gentle, it will feel very good.”

He swallowed Yuusaku’s middle and index finger, eyes not leaving that shocked face for a second. After coating both fingers, he opened his mouth to let Yuusaku pulled his shaking hand away, saliva dragging away from his tongue.

He straddled his lap. “Yuusaku, can you stretch me open?”

Yuusaku moaned, hand slowly sliding between his crack. Sensing hesitation, Ogata arched his back and sat down on those wet fingers, thighs rubbing against a lengthening hard-on behind him.

Cradling Yuusaku’s head, he scraped his nipple across the man’s lips. “Deeper, I can take it.”

Wet mouth closed around his nipple, and fingers began pumping in and out of his hole. Before Ogata could praise him, those fingers ground across his sweet spot, shaking his whole body.

What kind of virgin are you, so practiced?

Yuusaku stopped right away. “Did I hurt you, brother?” His genuine worry spoken through wet lips still pressed against a nipple.

Ogata whispered, almost begging. “It’s… sensitive… can’t…”

Yuusaku nodded like the dunce he was. “I’ll… I’ll be very gentle!” Then started circling that spot with shallow caress. Ogata clenched his teeth, feeling his own erection forming.

I mean, don’t touch there at all.

Determined to get sufficient preparation, Yuusaku fingered him to the brink, teased both nipples until swollen and tender while he was at it. When a third finger squeezed in, Ogata felt like his thighs are going to fail him.

“That’s enough… you can come in already...”

For all his obedience, Yuusaku suddenly turned stubborn, cinching the arm around his waist and keeping Ogata on his pumping fingers.

“Hang on brother, just a little more, or you’ll get hurt later.”

Ogata reached down to rub at Yuusaku’s rod. “Doesn’t matter—”

“Of course it matters!” Fingers drove punishingly into that sweet spot, ripping a loud moan from Ogata. “Brother must promise me not to get hurt so easily!”

“I don’t—”

“Promise me!”

Why are you hung up about this?

Gasping, Ogata yielded, nodding and smearing precum on Yuusaku’s chest. “I… I promise… just hurry, please…”

When his fingers finally pulled out, Yuusaku had to grab him by the waist before Ogata can impale himself on his thick length.

Ogata barely stopped himself from rolling his eye.

Stop caring so much.

He whined through stuttered breaths. “Does Yuusaku… not want me after all?”

Even in this state, Yuusaku managed to look completely sincere. He lifted Ogata up. “No brother, but let me take care of you this time!”

Ogata felt himself tipping backwards and shut his eyes against the inevitable impact against his head, only to fine Yuusaku’s hand gently cushioning the fall. He knelt between Ogata’s open legs, awkwardly holding his erection.

“Brother, you must tell me if this hurts.”

Ogata pulled his knees against his chest, baring his twitching hole.

“Can I also tell you if it feels good?”

Yuusaku laughed and panted at the same time, hovering over him and pressing against his hole. “That… that would be… very lewd, brother. But yes, I want to hear. I want to know that you feel good.”

The tip stretched open his entrance and Ogata spasmed, feeling himself split open inch by inch. He threw his head back and gasped.

Was it this big earlier?

Yuusaku buried his face into Ogata’s neck, his back muscle rippling under his fingers. “Just a bit more, brother…”

There’s more?

When he finally bottomed out, Ogata could barely breathe from the fullness. Yuusaku lifted himself up slightly, eyes both passionate and gentle.

“Brother… you’re so tight, and hot… feels so good…”

Ogata felt his inside clench uncontrollably, forcing a moan from them both.

Don’t say that when you’re already balls-deep.

“I’m going to move…”

Every withdrawal felt like it was pulling out his innards, yet every thrust so deep Ogata swear he could taste cum at the back of his throat. His own erection slapped wetly between them, dribbling precum. He thought with growing alarm that he had never lost his composure like this during an intercourse.

How am I going to hold

The thick shaft drilled into his sweet spot before he could finish that thought. He wailed.

“Ah…Ah! Don’t…”

Yuusaku paused. “Brother! Did I hurt you? I… I’ll pull out…”

And I’m going to kill you.

Diggins his nails into Yusaku’s back, Ogata squeezed his inside as hard as possible. “Don’t… don’t pull out… it’s good…”

“Does… does it feel good here, brother?” Yuusaku lifted him and started plowing into his sensitive spot at full force.

“Is it here? Does it feel good here?”

Fast learner on everything, aren’t we…

Less he hesitates again, Ogata forced himself to whisper, arms thrown across his eyes, already at the edge of his consciousness. “Yes… good… feels good…”

“I feel so good too, brother.” He cradled Ogata’s face between his forearms, staring deeply into his eyes. “I’m so close to you, makes me so happy…”

Looking away, Ogata began to panic.

“I love you so much, brother…”

Ogata hurriedly covered that mouth. “Don’t… don’t need to lie… Yuusaku is already very gentle, and that’s enough…”

Don’t fake this too.

Yuusaku took the fingers against his lips, wove them together and pressed their hands into the bed.

“I am not lying, and of course it’s not enough.”

Shut up shut up shut up….

“This is what those who love each other do…”

Don’t say it don’t say it...

“… so I must let you know that you’re loved too.”

Ogata squeezed his eyes shut, couldn’t bear another second of those tender eyes. Yuusaku ran his fingers across his sweat-damp cheeks, not easing the thrusting for one moment.

“Brother, don’t be afraid. Look, it’s me, your brother Yuusaku.”

Get it over with get it over with…

A hand wrapped around his twitching erection, and Ogata’s eyes flew open, defenseless as Yuusaku gazed straight into them. He never felt so violated.

“Brother, let us come together?”


Fingers ran across his oozing tip and Ogata went over the edge, cum splattering over their chests. His insides spasmed, milking Yuusaku until he too flooded his abused hole full of cum.

He didn’t let Ogata break eye contact until the very last shudder. “I love you so much, brother…”

You monster…

Their breaths easing, and Ogata finally closed his eyes when Yuusaku pressed his lips together. Sweat and cum cooled on their skin.

Tell me to get out, tell me I’m dirty…

Yuusaku slowly pulled out, the friction forcing another round of spasms from his overstimulated body. Warm cum dribbled out his hole.

Tell me you regret this, then it would all be worth it…

“Um… hold on, brother.” Yuusaku placed the cast iron kettle on the brazier, then went to pull out a stack of towels. Ogata curled up on his side, face pressed into the bedding.

Just let me go.

Yuusaku took his wooden shower basin from the closet, filled it with warm water and carried it to the bed.

“Let me clean you up. I’ll be quick.”

Ogata didn’t answer, letting Yuusaku wipe him down, every inch of skin the warm towel dragged over twitching.

Yuusaku tidied up, then curled up behind him and pulled the blanket over them. He rested a hand on Ogata’s waist and whispered in a voice already half-asleep.

“Good night, brother.”




That night, after Yuusaku had sunk into a deep slumber, Ogata turned around to watch that sleeping face. It was the peaceful and untroubled sleep that only those with a clean conscience could have.

Why can you stay clean?

Why can’t you be ruined?

It is because you’re loved, always?






Ogata woke up in the pale light, wondering why the usually frigid barracks got so warm. A hot breath crept past his neck, and he became aware of the body burning like a furnace behind him. He reached to grab Yuusaku’s pocket watch, sitting on the table.

“Mm… brother…” Yuusaku clung to his waist as Ogata sat up, putting the pocket watch back.

“I have to go.”

“But… day off…”

“Regular soldiers have muster.”

Yuusaku blinked up at him in the morning light, then gave him a sleep-softened smile. “Good morning, brother… I’m so hungry.”

Maybe idiots are beyond ruining.

Ogata turned around to dress. He stared at his own tunic, tucked inside Yuusaku’s, sharing the same hanger.

“Brother, let’s go to the mess hall together when you’re done, then we can—”

Ogata spun around, gripping Yuusaku’s face with both hands.

“Sir, what happened last night must remain a secret, understood?”

Yuusaku’s lowed his head with disappointment at the return to formality. Ogata forced his gaze back up.

“This is important. No one must know. If people start thinking you’re not a virgin, they may do things to… disrespect you.”

Think of the number of people I’ll have to kill.

Sensing Yuusaku was still stewing over his title, he pressed their heads together.

“Yuusaku, I promised you last night, now it’s your turn. Promise me you won’t tell anyone.”

Yusaku relented, docile once more. He nodded with brightening face. “I promise you, brother.”

Ogata stood up to leave. Yuusaku gripped his hand and held it against his lips.

“Brother… you know you can rely on me, right?

Ogata laughed, not pulling his hand away.

Bad idea to rely on someone who’s about to die.






Ogata walked across the empty base, shoving his hands into his pockets against the morning chill.

The sweet potato is still there.

Still some time before the muster…

He swung by the rifle range, sitting down on the boulder Yuusaku balanced on last night.

Hm…already cold…but still edible…

His peeled the skin off with stiff fingers.

A bit hard… but not completely ruined…

He slowly bit into it, the lump sitting cold in his mouth.

… not completely ruined… no need to throw it away…