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Destiny

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To be a Minion was to be...

Well, it was to be short and yellow, mostly. Although there was a certain amount of fiendishly obedient dusting that went with the job. Role. Lifestyle. Genetics...

(Okay, the dusting didn’t have to be fiendish, it was just more fun that way.)

And there was a line on the application form for weapons skills, which Minions needed to have although providing actual weapons generally resulted in the kind of results that required the further deployment of dustpans. Very large dustpans.

Still, to be a Minion was to be paid very well.

In bananas.