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Guilty Pleasure

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Hyung Seok yawned as he entered his cramped apartment and locked the door behind him with a click. He checked the time on his phone. There was just enough time for him to take a quick shower before the show started. He sighed happily at the feeling of hot water washing away the grime and sweat off from his part-time job at the warehouse.

Wiping away the fog covering its surface, Hyung Seok stared at himself in the mirror. People who knew him from middle school would probably no longer recognize him. He had gotten a lot fitter with the physical labour-intensive jobs that he had been taking on to cover as much of tuition as possible. There were dark circles under his eyes from continuous lack of sleep from trying to balance school and work. He constantly felt like he was on the urge of passing out, though he did his best to hide his exhaustion from his friends, and his mom when she called.

Not now though. He wasn’t tired at all now.

His heart pounding loudly in his chest, Hyung Seok slipped into his futon and opened his laptop screen. It was a familiar ritual at this point – navigating to the site, searching for the familiar chat room, shimmying out of his boxer-briefs in anticipation.

Silentj, that was the username of the camboy that had become Hyung Seok’s guilty pleasure, his reward after he managed to survive yet another week. The mysterious blond man was relaxed in a chair, wearing a fluffy white bathrobe that revealed much of his smooth chest. He took a light sip from the cup of wine pinched in the valley of his fingers, waving lightly at the gathering audience with his other hand. True to his username, he had never said a word in all the streams that Hyung Seok had watched.

His moans though… they drove Hyung Seok mad.

The chat room clamored with newcomers and regulars alike, wondering what kind of show would be awaiting them that night.

Once satisfied with how many people had joined, silentj slowly shrugged out of his bathrobe, to reveal a naked, muscular body underneath. A body that flawless just begged for someone to touch, taste, claim. Hyung Seok sucked in a breath as he saw the glint of metal revealed. A sleek steel ring lied at the base of the camboy’s half-erect cock. Silentj grabbed a bottle of lube from off screen and generously coated two of his fingers. Even though he did not say a single word, and there was no way to see the eyes hidden behind his bangs, Hyung Seok could have sworn the other was challenging the audience, practically asking, “How badly do you want this?”

Hyung Seok desperately wanted to start stroking himself but he held back.

The tips started rolling in. Viewers tripped over themselves to grab silentj’s attention, the amounts rising as silentj turned around, straddling the chair, giving the audience a good view of him pumping two fingers inside himself. He let out such an erotic moan that Hyung Seok felt pre-cum coating his palm, which had started to move as though on auto pilot.

Hyung Seok’s imagination ran wild as his breathing quickened. It was so easy to picture running his fingers through blond strands, playing with those pert pink nipples, and having it be his cock that slipped easily into the other’s hole in place of the sleek black vibrating anal plug.

Silentj’s whole body trembled as his hips rocked back and forth. He was achingly hard and let out periodic hitched moans as yet another tip triggered the device inside him, sending pleasure jolting up his spine.

“Mm, yes. L-let’s come together,” Hyung Seok whispered, spilling into his hand as silentj threw his head back and came as well.

That night, as Hyung Seok fell asleep, several orgasms later, he wondered, as he often did after these shows about who silentj was in real life. He judged that they seemed to be about the same age – early twenties. The other man was Korean, so it wasn’t impossible that he would also be in Seoul. Hyung Seok lips tilted up at the ridiculous notion that he would one day bump into his favourite camboy in person.

He had nothing. He was nothing. He had never even tipped.

There was no way silentj would be remotely interested.

Still, Hyung Seok had one thing he would like to tell the mysterious stranger.

“Thank you for helping me through tough times.”

-HHH-

Hyung Seok tried to calm his ragged breathing just outside the classroom door. He had overslept his alarm, resulting in him being late for the first time all semester. He could hear the economics professor already mid-lecture, on about something related to marginal costs of production. Holding his breath, and trying to cause as little disturbance as possible, he shot straight to an open seat he sighted in the furthest back row and shuffled out his notes and writing utensils in front of him.

He never usually sat this far back, preferring to be near the professor so he wasn’t distracted by his classmates, who were often scrolling through social media feeds. Hyung Seok was determined to keep his grades up, while covering as much of his tuition through part-time work as possible.

Hyung Seok kept taking notes diligently, all the while thinking that he should perhaps find someone to copy the notes from the first half of the lecture from. He casually glanced over at the classmate sitting beside him.

It took every fiber of his being to not externalize the yelp of surprise that came to his mind.

Wow I must be crazy tired, he thought, looking back at the professor. He pinched his leg with a grimace. I’m hallucinating. I must be hallucinating.

A few moments later, Hyung Seok’s curiousity got the best of him. He glanced over one more time and turned his neck back so fast it was a wonder he did not break anything.

Maybe if he had only ever watched silentj stream once or twice, he would have dismissed this as a coincidence. Hyung Seok had watched far more than that however and was intimately familiar with every inch of the other’s body.

There was no doubt about it. The camboy that he watched regularly was sitting next to him in his ECON 101 class.

Hyung Seok suddenly felt that his throat was extremely dry. The professor’s voice was nothing but a dull buzz in the background.

The panic only multiplied when the blond turned towards him, alerted by his staring, which had not been as subtle as he had thought. With a soft smile, the other pushed his notebook towards Hyung Seok.

“Ah, you’ll let me copy your notes from the first half of the lecture?” Hyung Seok surprised himself with how steady his voice was. He glanced at the front of the notebook, where the other’s name was written. Ah, so that’s what the ‘j’ stood for. “Th-thanks, Jae Yeol. It’s nice to meet you. I’m Hyung Seok.”

For the rest of the class, Hyung Seok alternated between listening to the lecture, having very inappropriate thoughts, and feeling guilty about the latter.

Having fantasies about an attractive camboy was one thing, having them about a classmate sitting next to you in the middle of class was quite another.

The professor’s words startled him out of his reverie. “Please find a partner for this research project and email me both your names and student IDs.”

Before Hyung Seok could react, he felt a light tug on the corner of his sleeve.

He knew what the other was asking. He knew it would end up being difficult for him. He opened his mouth to refuse, but felt the words caught in his throat at Jae Yeol’s hopeful look.

“Y-yeah, why not? Let’s be partners.”

He watched the way Jae Yeol smiled lightly, rubbing the back of his neck – the slim neck Hyung Seok had dreamed of marking, the one that he had seen in various chokers, collars, and ribbons.

“…”

“Y-your place this Saturday?”

The two of them. All alone.

Hyung Seok really should refuse, suggest a library or a café or some such.

Instead, what came out of his mouth startled them both. “It’s a date.” Soon after the words had left his lips, he hurried to correct himself. “I mean. That’s a good date. Let us go to study at your place on that date. Ahaha.”

Jae Yeol just gave Hyung Seok an enigmatic smile and passed over a piece of paper with his phone number on it.

-JJJ-

Jae Yeol wondered if Hyung Seok could hear his heart beating loudly as he opened the door to his apartment. The dark-haired man handed him a bag, which he peered into curiously. A smile stretched across his face in thanks as he saw that it there was a box of fried chicken inside.

This was all like a surreal dream. He had somehow managed to gather up the courage to ask the classmate he had been crushing on since the start of college to be his groupmate.

He had been happy to watch from the back of the class, but when the opportunity had come up the other day to get closer, maybe be friends, Jae Yeol had decided to take it. He knew that hoping for any more was probably unrealistic, but even being able to be this close to Hyung Seok and hear him discuss his day was already incredible.

Jae Yeol brought out soft drinks for both and they enjoyed a meal together. He listened with rapt curiousity as Hyung Seok talked about his part-time job, which sounded tiring but rewarding. Jae Yeol subtly eyed the outline of Hyung Seok’s muscles that he could see through the other’s shirt and gulped. He tried not to think of his own part-time job – which he quite enjoyed – but that he would be quite embarrassed if anyone else found out about. Fortunately, Hyung Seok did not ask him about it, so he did not have to lie.

Soon, they were working away at the economics project. Jae Yeol almost wished they were less efficient at it than they were, just so he could spend more time in Hyung Seok’s company.

He looked up sometimes from his laptop to see Hyung Seok quickly looking away, face a little red, and wondered if he had imagined it. They both leaned in once to look at a particular paragraph, and upon making contact, Hyung Seok pulled back as if electrified. Jae Yeol couldn’t help but feel a little bit hurt at the action, though they didn’t talk about it.

While Hyung Seok was taking a bathroom break, Jae Yeol sighed wistfully and pulled up his silentj Twitter account. It was time to let his fans know that he was going to be missing his upcoming stream because he had too much schoolwork piling up.

Ding!

Jae Yeol blinked in confusion at the sound he heard when he pressed “send” on his tweet. His laptop was on mute. Taking a quick look around, he found Hyung Seok’s cell phone left facing up on the table.

His eyes widened at what he saw and gears in his brain started turning.

Silentj @Silentj

Taking a break next week, but will be back with a special treat <3

-HHH-

Hyung Seok was simultaneously happy that they were making so much progress on their project, but also sad that at this rate, he would not have an excuse to come visit again. Looking over at Jae Yeol, he let out a wistful sigh. There was so much he wanted to learn about the mysterious blond.

“…”

“Oh, dessert? Yeah, I would love to have some.”

The richly layered chocolate mousse Jae Yeol brought out of the fridge looked delicious. Hyung Seok thoughts inadvertently flashed to a stream where Jae Yeol had been doing some food play – he had imagined licking all over the other’s body. He scooped up and swallowed a spoonful of cake, focusing on the silky texture and taste to try to get his brain back on track.

Just as he was about to comment that it was delicious, he heard Jae Yeol let out a moan that went straight to his groin.

“Y-you’re really enjoying that cake.”

Jae Yeol nodded enthusiastically, taking another bite, and letting out another moan that made Hyung Seok flush. His eyes twinkled with what looked like mischief.

“Ah, you have some cake here.” Hyung Seok gestured at Jae Yeol’s cheek.

Jae Yeol tilted his head, as though asking where.

Hyung Seok reached over without thinking to wipe it off with his index finger. Before he could lean back, Jae Yeol gently took his hand in his own and popped Hyung Seok’s finger, along with the smidgen of cake, into his mouth. Jae Yeol’s tongue did things that almost made Hyung Seok faint on the spot.

“Jae Yeol?”

Jae Yeol slid a hand onto Hyung Seok’s thigh, leaning in to whisper in his ear. Hyung Seok’s eyes widened at the knowledge that Jae Yeol knew that he knew.

Hyung Seok felt like cold water had been splashed over him. It dawned on him that maybe Jae Yeol’s actions weren’t out of attraction, but because he was scared. He immediately started clarifying. “I swear I won’t tell anyone, Jae Yeol! I didn’t mean anything bad by not talking about it… I just didn’t know how to bring it up… I don’t want anything from you in return.”

Jae Yeol had practically slid into Hyung Seok’s lap at this point, his hands slowly gliding under Hyung Seok’s shirt to feel out strong abs. He gave Hyung Seok what could only be described as a pout, clearly not wanting to stop. “…”

“W-what if you want something from me?”

Hyung Seok once again wondered if he was dreaming, but Jae Yeol felt hot and real next to him. He could feel the other man was hard through his jeans. He himself had been half hard all evening.

The only words he could think of fell from his lips, “You can have it. Anything you want.”