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Breaking out of the vicious circle

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Kurosawa had never cared much for Halloween until this year, the first Halloween with his Adachi together. He had secretly planned on suggesting partner look costumes but seeing as Adachi seemed to be irked about the whole idea of dressing up in general, he had dropped it. Spending time with him was enough to make him happy, or so he thought, when Adachi sent him a selfie a week prior to the event.

Unsure if he wasn't dreaming or not, even though he technically knew he was since he was in the office, Kurosawa stared at the photo twice, zooming in and out to make sure it was really Adachi that was on the screen. He furrowed his brows and put down the hot cup of coffee he had just gotten from the vending machine, putting it carefully on his desk and making sure nobody would take a glimpse on his phone. He coughed a bit, couldn't help it though, drawing the attention of those around him on him and having to put on one of his best smiles and waving off their concerns.

After the area had cleared, he leaned back a little in his chair, though not quite daring to take a sip from the cup again with what was presented before his eyes.

It was Adachi for sure in the photograph, yet he looked like a totally different person. Black leather jacket and very tight black rippled jeans with some skin showing, hair wild and combed backwards and up, a black shirt and a fancy silver necklace accentuating the look. The shirt was rather low cut, alluring collarbones showing and there was a soft blush on Adachi's cheeks, Kurosawa could tell it must have taken him some courage to send this.

(I rented this. You seemed happy about the idea of costumes. Maybe they aren't that bad) The text said, followed by a cute sticker.

Kurosawa took his phone in both hands and began to type his reply.

(Is it possible for me to see that on you in person?)

(It's possible)

(Oh Adachi you have no idea what you do to me, I can't tell you now, text you later!)

And with that, Kurosawa put his phone down and tried to focus on work.

During breaktime however, he went to the break room where he had agreed to meet with Adachi, but he was too early and only Rokkaku was there.

"Kurosawa-san!" he exclaimed in his usual excited manner, "are you also looking forward to our Halloween party? I heard that the boss is going to have a very interesting costume"

"Ah, is that so," Kurosawa said, not the least bit interested.

"Do you think Adachi-senpai will also participate? I want everyone to have a good time together!" Rokkaku said with his serious gaze, leaning forward into Kurosawa's personal space and the other man smiled a bit helplessly.

"Ah! Adachi-senpai!" Rokkaku called out excitedly, and Kurosawa turned his head around in the direction Rokkaku was looking.

Adachi bowed quickly before approaching them.

"Want to have lunch together?" Rokkaku smiled, "we can talk about costume ideas!"

Kurosawa sighed a bit. You just couldn't be mad at him.

*

When it was time to go home, Kurosawa dragged out his work extra long to be able to go home with Adachi together without looking too suspicious.

When everyone had finally said goodbye, it was already half dark in the large office and Kurosawa made his way up to Adachi's desk.

Adachi stretched while shutting the PC down.

"You know," Adachi said, "actually putting on that costume was kind of fun. I hadn't even expect it to be. I wasn't sure about the idea of partner looks, but I liked trying something new. I usually don't like to stand out, but I liked your reaction, and making you happy, so I did it."

Kurosawa leaned in a little, voice lower and sweet like honey.

"It did make me happy. I couldn't get that image of you out of my head all day. Would have told you sooner but it wasn't quite possible."

Adachi chuckled remembering Rokkaku interrupting their breaktime.

"We can hold a Halloween party with him," he said, turning around in his chair, "but I'd rather have one with you alone, too..."

Kurosawa put down his bag and elegantly smashed his hand on the backrest of Adachi's chair, forehead so close to Adachi's face that Adachi could feel his breath on his cheeks.

"Would you want for me to dress up aswell?" Kurosawa purred, and Adachi began to look around nervously even though there was nobody there since half an hour.

Kurosawa fixated him with his gaze and it was like he was pinning him to his chair without actually touching him.

"I-If you want," Adachi stammered a bit, and Kurosawa smirked, withdrawing and fetching his bag.

"Let's go?" he said and Adachi nodded.

*

One night before the actual Halloween night, Kurosawa and Adachi met at Adachi's place for 'costume fitting', how Kurosawa had called it.

To be honest it was just a lame excuse to see that outfit on Adachi in person, and Kurosawa almost felt a little bad for not telling him.

So when Adachi opened the door already dressed up, Kurosawa took the initiative and closed the door behind him wordlessly, taking Adachi's hand and pinning him against the wall of the entrance with a gentle, quick and firm motion, having the other gasp softly.

It was true that Adachi didn't like to dress up, but if he got such a reaction from Kurosawa, he might reconsider.

"I meant to tell you how hot you look," Kurosawa whispered into his ear, taking a tempting looking earlobe gently between his teeth and tugging on it, and Adachi blushed so much he wished he could throw his hands over his face but they were at his sides now.

"I said I wanted to do a fitting, but that was only half of the truth. Truth is I really wanted to see you wearing this," Kurosawa went on.

"O-ook," Adachi said and smiled a little. He felt how much Kurosawa was into him and slowly began to become engulfed in that feeling.

Kurosawa himself was still in his long winter coat, so Adachi hadn't had a chance to see his outfit yet, but he could already see that Kurosawa's eyes looked different from before, accentuated with black eyeliner, which only heightened he effect of his gaze on Adachi even more.

"What are you wearing, btw" Adachi asked curiously, "I haven't seen it yet."

"Oh right," Kurosawa said, withdrawing and opening the coat. With each button that was unbuttoned, more and more of the outfit was revealed, and Adachi gaped.

Underneath the coat was a silky black dress with a waterfall cut, thin straps, the look being completed by a pair of black high heeled boots on Kurosawa's long, pretty legs.

Kurosawa blushed softly.

"I asked my sister to help me with a choice, and she said this would look good on me, and also lend it to me. It looks ridiculous, doesn't it?" He tried to laugh it off but Adachi kept gaping at him in awe.

"Come on, you can say it, it doesn't matter, it is just Halloween anyway" Kurosawa went on, folding his coat and about to place it on the shelf when he felt Adachi grabbing his arm and now it was Kurosawa who gasped in surprise, being the one who was pressed against the wall with a surprising strength he hadn't even expected Adachi to have. Looks could be so deceiving.

"You look so hot," Adachi said with his earnest gaze and big eyes, "I feel like I really want to kiss you.."

It took Kurosawa a moment to adjust to the situation, the coat sliding out of his arms, landing on the floor. Kurosawa placed his hands on Adachi's arms.

"Then.. kiss me," he breathed, dark orbs on Adachi's face, looking into his eyes while sliding his hands in Adachi's hair and pulling him closer, but he didn't really have to since Adachi was already reaching forward and pressing upon him with a force that had Kurosawa moan softly.

"I'm sorry, I don't know what has gotten into me," Adachi whispered, withdrawing again but Kurosawa shook his head.

"If you like it, you like it. Nothing wrong with that. I'd tell you if you did something I don't like. Besides, you just swept me off my feet with that kiss. I.. God I wish you'd do that again"

Adachi chuckled. He wasn't used to be the one to make Kurosawa flustered. Usually it was the other way around. Gaining more confidence, maybe also because of what he was wearing, he reached forward again and captured Kurosawa's lips who responded to the kiss immediately. Adachi's shampoo and the smell of the leather jacket mixing together with his own scent was a rather thrilling combination, and Kurosawa tried to take in of it as much as he could.

"T-touch me," he whispered into Adachi's hair, hands sliding down Adachi's back and then, reluctantly, he felt Adachi's hands on him.

Slowly testing at first whether it was really okay, and testing where to touch, but then he became bolder with each step. Kurosawa let him explore, closing his eyes and leaning his head back against the wall, presenting his neck and jawline and Adachi leaned forward to nibble on it since that was something he enjoyed when Kurosawa did that to him.

"Hhnghh God yes that feels so good, Adachi," Kurosawa whispered, "you're so good"

If there was something Kurosawa liked doing in bed it was praising Adachi, but until today he had only done it in the context of being on top.

And it helped Adachi, helped him gain more confidence to try out new things, explore new territory. He places his right hand on Kurosawa's chest, feeling the silky fabric that felt nice underneath his fingertips but he also felt Kurosawa's heartbeat and the outlines of his pectoral, and he became curious and wanted to touch more, letting his hand roam around a bit and gently squeeze it here and there.

Kurosawa kept his eyes close and breathed evenly, fully enjoying Adachi exploring him like this.

It didn't even feel weird to wear a dress anymore, and the high heeled boots did hurt a bit but they began to make him feel sexy. He bent his knee a bit and let it slide higher, between Adachi's legs, having the other growl a little in pleasure and Kurosawa smirked, however he still kept his eyes closed.

Adachi's hand went on with its journey, down his abs and lower, and up again along his neck and collarbones which were visible with how low cut that dress was.

Being thankful to his sister for pestering him into wearing this, Kurosawa let go underneath Adachi's curious fingertips. Adachi's lips were on his neck again and Kurosawa could feel that this was getting to Adachi aswell, as for his arousal was pressing hard against his own now, and this time it was not captured in pants but more easily accessible. All Adachi would have to do was slide his hand...

Kurosawa moaned. His head bumped against the wall and he clung to the other, hips jerking forward. Adachi was cupping his bulge in his black boxers he was wearing, hand underneath the dress and it must sure look naughty. Finally, Kurosawa opened his eyes and was met with a glaze of lust through wild hair while Adachi's hand was still working on him, slowly cupping the outlines of Kurosawa's cock, rubbing and massaging gently.

"You look so hot right now," Adachi said, and his breath was a little ragged.

"You too.. I.. omg.. I.. Adachi!" Kurosawa whimpered.

Never ever had he imagined in his wildest dreams it would come to this.

His heartbeat went wild, his ears rang and he was weak on his knees, so much that he thought if he had to stand any longer, they might give in. He was so delighted to do this with Adachi, his Adachi, to experience this pleasure together with the man he loved so much and cared about, exploring that he liked this, being like this, being treated like this. He was so turned on that he was afraid he wouldn't even make it to the bed or whereever they would hopefully soon end up fucking, and he didn't care what spot Adachi would choose. And for sure this memory would burn into his brain and he would certainly fap to this whenever he could, with that picture of Adachi in his mind, hair messy and those stupid tight pants and that stupid hot jacket and...

"Kurosawa?" he heard Adachi's voice calling out to him almost from an otherworldly place and turned to look at him, lips kiss swollen, slightly parted, cheeks flushed.

Kurosawa cupped Adachi's face in his hands and pecked those lips before humming.

"Hm?"

"I.. hold on I gotta take off this jacket, it's becoming too hot honestly..." Adachi smiled sheepishly and it made Kurosawa want to squish him.

He watched Adachi stripping it off, flexing his shoulder muscles that were even more visible now with that thin low cut shirt and the silver necklace.

"Adachi.." Kurosawa whispered breathlessly, "I want to tell you something..."

"Hm? What is it?" Adachi asked with that usual oblivious gaze that Kurosawa found so adorable.

"I want to suggest to switch tonight," Kurosawa said firmly, and Adachi's eyes widened.

"Switch.. as in.. switch.. switch?" He uttered and Kurosawa nodded seriously.

"Yes. What I'm saying is that I want you to top me. If you agree, I'd of course guide you through every step."

Adachi let out a sigh. This was sudden, but if he was honest, with the way things have evolved this night so far, it wasn't that surprising, now was it?

"I.. don't know if I can do it," Adachi said, his head hanging down a bit, watching the floor and his hands fidgeted a little, "of course I want to make you happy if you want this, but..."

"Adachi, listen," Kurosawa said, and suddenly his voice was very serious. His hands grabbed Adachi's arms and he looked him straight in the eyes, "I love you no matter what. I enjoy any way being with you. It's up to you to decide. You don't have to push yourself, okay? You are able to do this, the question is, do you want to?"

Kurosawa's words lingered heavily in the room, almost like literal letters that had obtained a physical form and were now floating around Adachi's head.

Adachi closed his eyes and tried to imagine what could lie ahead. Kurosawa underneath him. Kurosawa being open and willing and trusting him, the one without confidence, to make him feel good. Kurosawa who would so willingly give himself to him, letting him do such an important task. Technically he knew what to expect since Kurosawa had done this with him before, but now it was different. Sure, Kurosawa had said he would give guidance, but...

Adachi shook his head. Kurosawa almost misunderstood that gesture and slowly let down his hands from Adachi's arms. But Adachi had just shaken his head to shake off the worries he had. He imagined Kurosawa, and that image was nice. Also, it was like Kurosawa had said. He loved him. And he loved Kurosawa. It didn't matter in what way they did it. It was up to them to form this.

"I want to try! Please teach me!" Adachi said firmly and a little louder than intended.

Before Adachi could say more, Kurosawa had reached out and pulled him into a tight embrace.

Kurosawa took a deep breath, and nuzzled his nose into Adachi's hair before drawing back.

"Leave it to me," he smiled cheekily, and leaned back against the entrance wall where they were still standing, "where do you want me?" knowing full well he would fluster Adachi with such a question. To emphasize his teasing, he raised an eyebrow together with the smirk and Adachi didn't know where to look or what to say. In the half dark, the black eyeliner brought out that Kurosawa gaze even more and Adachi felt it everywhere in his body.

Kurosawa decided it would be upon himself to pick a place for this for tonight and to make things less complicated, he choose Adachi's bed. For their encounters, Adachi had recently begun to keep the necessities in a far away corner of his nightstand, so Kurosawa wouldn't have to worry about this for now. So Kurosawa smiled and took Adachi's hand and they walked inside.

"I suppose the bed is fine?" Kurosawa whispered, and Adachi nodded.

"I'll get us some water first, I'm hella thirsty," Adachi said quickly, and hurried to the kitchen. It was only half the truth, the other half was to buy some more time. But he wanted to do this. Pressing his lips together determinedly, he came back with two full glasses and Kurosawa thankfully took one from him, downing half of it and they sat on the edge of the bed in silence.

"This is awkward," Adachi said honestly when he put his glass down, "because it feels like we have to start from zero."

Kurosawa nodded, also putting his glass down. "I know what you mean," he said, "but like I said, we don't have to do anything. We can just go with the flow."

"The dress.. looks good on you," Adachi said after a while and Kurosawa widened his eyes a bit.

"Actually it feels nice to wear, too," he replied, stroking over the fabric on the thighs, and Adachi's gaze followed the movement, "it's a nice fabric"

Adachi shook his head. "It's not just that," he said, "there is something about you in that dress that makes me want to touch you"

If there was something Kurosawa loved about Adachi, it was that he was an honest and sincere guy. The guys he had been with had often used fake flattery to get him laid, and Kurosawa wasn't that dumb to not see through their compliments. But with Adachi he knew he meant what he said, and it made his heart beat faster.

"Then touch me," Kurosawa said gently, for the second time that night, looking at Adachi from the side, and since they hadn't turned on any lights, the moonlight fell beautifully on his pale skin and accentuated his collarbones and neck and Adachi nodded, gently reaching out and letting his fingertips trace along those spots.

Kurosawa closed his eyes and took a deep breath, and now that they had talked about everything and made it clear, it was so much better: Adachi's lips that were slowly dragging along his neck, his hand in his hair, even the way that Kurosawa slowly lay down with Adachi on top of him.

"I want to do my best," Adachi said sweetly and Kurosawa nodded before pulling him down for a sensual long and lewd kiss. Adachi took his time to play with Kurosawa's tongue, and Kurosawa was more than eager to respond, their tongues rubbing together in the rhythm they had found for each other a long time ago. Adachi's hand was on Kurosawa's body again, this time sliding up the dress further, revealing the black boxers.

"I.. Can you keep the dress on?" Adachi suddenly said and Kurosawa raised an eyebrow before smirking.

"Yes," he emphasized, and Adachi reached around him for the drawer which he wasn't able to open like this, so Kurosawa helped him.

"Thanks," Adachi whispered, "I'm a bit nervous"

"That's fine," Kurosawa said, "and remember if you have any questions other than what I'll explain, please don't hesitate to ask"

Adachi nodded and began to undress himself with shaky fingertips. Kurosawa had told him once that he enjoyed watching him doing that and he had found out he liked Kurosawa's gaze on him. When he was just in his underwear, he sat on the edge of the bed and fumbled with the bottle of lube.

Kurosawa almost wanted to reach out and say 'Let me', but he held back and just then Adachi managed to open it and the look on his face about having been able to do it on his own was priceless.

Kurosawa smiled a bit, but that smiley gaze only lasted until Adachi brought some of the liquid on his fingers with that ever concentrated expression he did everything with, being diligent whether it was working or preparing his boyfriend.

Adachi gulped but resettled on the bed and Kurosawa shoved the dress up some, stripping out of his boxers. Adachi pursed his lips, wondering how to proceed best and Kurosawa could tell he was hesitating.

"It's fine, just start as you think it's best, and we'll go from there"

Adachi nodded and sat between Kurosawa's legs then, his own legs crossed. Kurosawa looked at Adachi's serious face and had to remember not to hold his breath but keep on breathing evenly. Adachi leaned forward some and used his middle finger first, nudging against the puckered rim, hearing Kurosawa gasping. The least thing he wanted was to hurt him.

Everything in Kurosawa's body screamed 'take me, fuck me, put them in me' but he ignored those screams for now. This was more important.

When Adachi finally pressed the tip of his middle finger inside, both let out a little noise. Adachi because of the new feeling, and Kurosawa because, well, because it felt amazing.

"More.. please.. Adachi... it's fine, you can move a little.. and go a bit deeper.. and ugh" Kurosawa's instructions were cut off as Adachi pressed his middle finger inside deeper, moving around, pulling it out again and bringing it back inside.

"Second one now?" Adachi asked, heart rate speeding up some, and Kurosawa nodded. The pain was minimal, and Kurosawa tried his best to relax. The second finger together with the first was a bit uncomfortable, but Adachi had used enough lube. Kurosawa took a deep breath.

"It's.. it's good.. can you go a little faster?"

"Kurosawa.." Adachi just whispered as he began to speed up, and also bend his fingers somewhat. He wanted to make Kurosawa feel good and he was searching for that one spot...

"Adachi! Ugh, fuck," Kurosawa exclaimed then, back arching somewhat and the dress slid up further, eyes closed and the neck shimmering with sweat. Adachi understood. He set up a rhythym, harder than before, trying to reach that spot again. He remembered how good this made him feel when it was Kurosawa doing this to him.

"Adachi.. oh God," Kurosawa whined as Adachi continued to determinedly bang him into the mattress.

"S-stopp," Kurosawa suddenly uttered and Adachi immediately removed his fingers.

"Did I do something wrong?" he asked in slight panic, but Kurosawa only frantically shook his head.

"No.. ugh, it's just, it's too good already, if you keep this up I'll come just like that"

Adachi blushed a bit and Kurosawa smiled. Adachi sat back and took a look at Kurosawa. He looked amazing, just like he had imagined. And they would do this together. It would be fine. The eyeliner was smudged a little and the hair was slightly messy and there was a soft glow on Kurosawa's cheeks and his neck. Adachi gulped, feeling his cock react to the sight. He realized he wanted this, his body wanted this too, he wanted to be inside Kurosawa. He sat back and stripped out of the boxers. They fell to the floor, the last piece of fabric that had separated them. Now it would get serious.

Adachi resettled on the bed, stroking up and down Kurosawa's thighs, looking at him loving before he opening the foil package with a determined look on his face and took his own cock in his hand, stroking it to full hardness again, feeling Kurosawa's eyes on him heavily.

"This looks amazing," Kurosawa said after a while with his voice low, "I love when you do that for me. When you touch yourself and show me how it feels good for you"

Adachi moaned at that, Kurosawa's words were always getting to him. During their first time together he remembered it also having been Kurosawa's voice and words that had gotten him off in the end.

"I want to feel you in me so bad," Kurosawa went on, and Adachi felt his cock react, twitching nicely into his hand. Deciding it was enough, he tried to roll the condom over, but it took him another try to do so.

"Do you want me like this?" Kurosawa smirked a little, "or should I turn around?"

Adachi shook his head. "Like this is fine. So I can see your face."

"We can do the other ways later," Kurosawa grinned and Adachi's eyes widened. He totally hadn't thought of the possibility that they could do this again later on. As often as they wanted.

Expectedly, it was a little difficult at first for both of them. Adachi was a little insecure and hesitant, making Kurosawa worried in the progress which led to him to tense up in the end. It seemed like a vicious circle they would have to break out of.

"It's not going to work like this," Kurosawa finally said, "but I have an idea," he smiled at the almost disappointed expression hushing over Adachi's face.

"Think of something nice. Think of something we did together. In bed. Think of how good you felt. Relax. Remember me inside you, fucking you, making you feel good, making you scream."

Adachi felt himself getting hot at those words and he obeyed, closing his eyes and picturing them together. The images were hot and turned him on, keeping his cock throbbing with need, precum starting to leak from the tip and Adachi felt his hips wanting to move forward on their own. He held onto Kurosawa's hips and used his right hand to guide his cock over Kurosawa's entrance, but this time, he used the force of his hips to push inside further than last time, and had both of them groaning as a result.

Kurosawa groaned in a slight mix of pain and pleasure.

"Go on," he gasped, "it's fine, just roll your hips, ugh yes"

Adachi nodded as another noise feel from his lips. He felt safe with Kurosawa having said he would guide him through it and with each moment he gained more confidence that he also would be able to make him feel good. His hips rolled into the others and his cock pushed deeper inside Kurosawa's tight heat which welcomed it, and it felt so good, fucking tight and amazing that he only wanted to push forward more and draw back again and then he realized it it. He was fucking Kurosawa.

Adachi had his eyes closed and a shiny film of sweat was covering his neck and to Kurosawa, he looked absolutely gorgeous, so lost in the pleasure, but Kurosawa didn't have much of composure left to admire the sight because the more Adachi moved inside him, the more he lost himself in the pleasure.

"K-Kurosawa," he heard Adachi moaning, "it's so good, you feel so good" and Kurosawa nodded, his hands clenching in the sheets, the silky black dress shoved up his chest, his toned abs showing, flexing as his body took more of Adachi.

"Faster.. please.." Kurosawa gasped, the need prickling on his skin.

Adachi leaned over him then, supporting himself on his elbows to be closer, watching Kurosawa intently and licking along his neck as his hips jerked forward and thrusted into Kurosawa deep and Kurosawa cried out beautifully when Adachi's cock rubbed against his prostate.

Kurosawa's hands clung on Adachi's back then, and he whispered into his ears: "Yes.. like that.. yesss... don't stop" and Adachi moaned into his ears, bringing Kurosawa higher and higher with each little desperate sound, his hips moving in a nice and deep rhythm now, completely lost in pleasure.

"Adachi.. Adachi... I'm gonna come," Kurosawa uttered hoarsely, fingertips digging into the sweaty back and the abs of the other man rubbed and stimulated his swollen cock.

"Kurosawa," Adachi gasped into Kurosawa's ear, "I'm close too..."

"I love you," Kurosawa pressed out and a tear rolled down his cheek he didn't even know he had in his eye when his body tightened and his cock twitched, spurting white liquid hard between their sweaty bodies.

The bed rocked with Adachi's thrusts which were getting desperate now, and it was so beautiful to see him just act on his urges, letting his needs take over and chase his release.

"Come.. come on.." Kurosawa encouraged him, "your cock feels so good in me, I want you to ride it all out baby, come on"

Adachi groaned and buried his face in Kurosawa's neck, blushing a deep red as he shot his load, his whole body trembling, panting hard and sweating.

"Oh my God," he mumbled when he pulled out, tossing the condom away and falling flatly onto Kurosawa's torso, not caring about the mess. Not wanting to move an inch, he felt Kurosawa's warm breath on his skin and lying here on top of him made him feel so complete and he didn't want to go anywhere else.

"I think I have to pay for the cleaning of your sister's dress," Adachi murmured after a while and Kurosawa laughed softly.

"Let's just not tell her why" Kurosawa added and tousled Adachi's hair, "she's fine with us being together but you know, that's a little too much information"

Adachi nodded sleepily and smiled.

That night, he dreamt about next year's Halloween, determined he would celebrate it again.

With Kurosawa.