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You found him in the front most pew, his bright clothes and light eyes shimmering under the stained glass above. He was praying, or so you had to assume. You had never done it before - the experience was foregin to you, but the position was familiar. As you approached, your footsteps echoing on the polished floor, he didn’t stir. He kept his eyes focused on the statue of the saint that stood high and mighty, right in the middle of the stage before him.

He was pretty. That was obvious. He always was. Even when he was doing some extremely lame shit, like sitting in Church Prime wasting away the hours kissing Jesus’ ass. You were enjoying the view, even if it was in such a bullshit scene. 

Because it was bullshit. It was more than bullshit. 

It was boring. 

Boring. That’s the first thought you had about this whole situation. Fucking boring. What was the point of something like this? You weren’t getting into heaven anyway.

And he wouldn’t be getting in either, if you could help it.

“Hey!” You shouted out and he jumped. He whipped around and his cheeks flushed in a gentle, dolly way as he calmed down and realized it was you. Before he can get a word in, you pick up your pace and slide into the pew next to him.

“Oh!” He smiled sheepishly. “Hey, Sapnap.” He brushed some hair from his eyes.

“Dude. Where the hell have you been? We’re waiting for you over in L’Manberg. There’s some dumb event happening.” Your foot tapped impatiently.

“Sorry.” He crossed his legs at the ankles and swung his feet. “I’ve just been slacking. You know?”

“Slacking?” You raised an eyebrow. You scoffed. “At what? Speaking to a sky giant who eats babies? That’s weak shit. Come on, let’s go.” 

You went to stand but Karl sat there shaking his head. “Nope. I’m not done.” He said. He folded his delicate hands together again and you couldn’t help but stare at his fingers. They were soft. You knew the skin on them well. You were ripped from your thoughts as he continued to speak. “I have a few more things to do. Chill out and be patient, Sapnap.”

You slumped down in your seat. “Dude, seriously? Like what?”

“I still have to say the Lord’s prayer. And just keep getting in my time, you know?”

“Your ‘time’?” Your voice dripped with a bit of disgust.

He turned to you and gave you a look. His lavender eyes sparkle with a light that you know well, and that you adore. You melt to it. “Yes.” He chuckled. “My time.”

“Time with who?”

“With the Lord.”

You couldn’t fight that now. You’re a little too smitten. You stayed slumped in your seat and you placed your chin in your hand. “Okay. Whatever. Do your Jesus shit, I’ll watch.”

“Watch?” His nose scrunched. 

You nodded. “Yeah. Really, really closely. Might learn something.”

“Don’t watch too close, I’ll get all nervous.” Karl giggled.

But you did watch closely. You watched so closely you didn’t get to hear a single word he said. You were too focused on his lips, and the way his thick eyelashes fluttered with every word. He looked like he didn’t have to think about what he was doing - it was instinct. He was almost never this relaxed. 

Karl was hyper, with a hummingbird heartbeat, so seeing him this calm was a bit off-putting. But it was also weirdly hot. It was hot in that weird way you also found rainbow socks hot. It didn’t make sense but it was there and it was definitely interrupting the blood flow to your head. 

Your blood was flowing somewhere else. 

You were getting a bit of a problem in your pants as Karl’s plump lips continued to move and his shoulders slumped down until he was bowing a bit more. He was comfortable, in his natural state. He was swaying back and forth a bit, a small wave of a movement that could have been brushed over if you didn’t know him well enough to know his quirks. But you knew.

You shifted around in your seat and sat up straighter. You had to hide your issue.

But maybe you didn’t want to hide it. You turn around and your amber eyes scanned the church. It was empty. Completely empty. No one else would come in here - no one else cared like Karl did. So this was a good opportunity for you. This could be something fun. 

Disgusting thoughts weren’t foreign to you. And you acting on them wasn’t foreign to him. This could work.

“Karl. Babe.” You said. 

You clearly interrupted something, because he turned and gave you a pouty look. “Yes…?”

“I need to know right now if there is anything on earth I could do that could make you hate me.” You said. 

Karl’s eyebrows shot up. “What?” His jaw was slack. “No! What…” The way you asked that must have gotten to him. He was sensitive like that. “Sapnap, I could never. Shut up.” He nudged you. 

In response, you adjusted your pants again. “I have this idea. Okay? And it’s a little stupid and a little embarrassing but nothing is more embarrassing than, you know. Being Catholic. So.”

Karl frowned. “You’re not starting this stuff off that strong.”

“I’m not starting off anything yet.” You said. You smirked, your tongue running along the sharp edges of your teeth. His cheeks flushed and that made you content. “Babe, how good are you at multitasking?”

He cocked his head. His eyes reflected curiosity. “I mean…” He bit his lip as he talked. His head seemed so chaotic - fluttering from one subject to the next with the attention span of a child. It was beautifully endearing. “I think so? I would like to think so. I mean...I don’t keep track of that. But I have to be, right? You know? Yeah.”

Your snarky smile grew and grew. “Well, then.” You leaned over and set an arm on the wooden backing behind Karl. He moved like water, settling against you easily, instinctively. Your other hand started to crawl. It started on Karl’s knee, feeling the dark purple corduroy of his pants soft against your callused fingers. Then it moved up, higher and higher until it just barely danced over the zipper.

Karl nearly jumped out of his skin. “Sapnap!” He cried. His ears were rose red. He looked around frantically. “You can’t just do that, we’re in public!” He pushed away your hand.

“Yes, and?”

“We’re in a church!” 

You were genuinely confused. “”

He blinked at you, incredulous. “It’s a church. You can’t do this stuff in a church.”

Well. That didn’t sit well with you.

Karl wasn’t one to say no. He was always ready, he was always on top of you. He was a puppy, a butterfly - overeager and undereducated and ready to jump into your arms at any given chance. 

But not here. He was resisting here. 

You wanted to burn this church to the ground for attempting to cockblock you. 

“Karl…” You whined. “I won’t even interrupt your prayers! I won’t get in the way of your God shit. Please?” You started to pout.

The look on Karl’s face gave away his desires, even if his lips continued to protest. His eyes were wide with blown pupils, his lip seemed to quiver. His hands flexed open and close. It was all the little signs you saw in your head every time you took a shower and rubbed one out. “Sapnap…” He trailed off. “We can’t…What if we get in trouble?”

“Trouble?” You snorted. “We aren’t in fucking middle school.”

“But what if we get caught!” Karl cried.

“By who?!” You cried and waved your hands around. “I don’t know anyone who would come to Church Prime willingly!”

“But they might!”

“How’s this?” Your hand found its way to his knee again. “You finish up praying. I’ll keep an eye out. And we’ll be okay. Okay?”

Karl hesitated. “Sapnap…”

“Baby, trust me.” You scooted an inch closer. “Do you trust me?”

Karl nodded as his legs separated while your hand, large against his small thighs, moved up to grip the valley between them. You felt his member under the fabric, starting to harden. He was already wiggling under your grip. “Sapnap - “

“Do you trust me? Say it outloud.” You said firmly.

He nodded again. “Yes. Yes, I trust you.”

You feel yourself smile again. “Good. Beautiful boy.” You tightened your grip on his crotch. Karl gasped and that only made you smile harder. “What prayer did you say you had to do?”


You clicked your tongue in disappointment. “Karl, Karl, Karl. Baby. You can’t already start slacking.”

His brow furrowed as he tried to remember. His hands were flexing again. “Um...The Lord’s prayer. I need to finish it.”

“Any others you can tack onto that? That feels a bit short for what I want to do.” You chuckled. You start rubbing your hand in a circle, coaxing on Karl’s arousal. You took a moment to push the hem of Karl’s pastel sweater out of the way so you could start to tease the button on his pants.

“You want a...long one?” Karl turned to look at him. His nose was flushed pink. 

You’re going to get a long one if this goes well.” You used your thumb to unhook his fly.

“Don’t be gross!”

“Do you have a long prayer or not?”

He chewed the inside of his cheek while he thought. “Um...I don’t have a rosary with me, but I know the, uh, prayer. The saying. Thing.” He let out a whimper as you peeled away the fabric of his pants to reveal the soft cotton of his underwear.

“How about you put your hands together, close your eyes, and start saying it? Really mean it. Think all about Jesus. And that stiff wood he died on.”

“Ew!” He cried.

You paused to laugh before slipping your hand under the pants. You can feel the extent of his length, fitting daintily into your large hand. The rings and finger tattoos that adorned you contrasted with the delicate nature of his entire existence. You used a sharp black nail to trace the underside of his cock. He trembled.

“Well.” You said. “Get started, pretty boy.”

His petal pink lips parted, just barely glimmering with spit, and he started to stutter out the first line. “I believe in God, the Father almighty, Creator of heaven and earth.” As the words left his mouth in his reluctant, begging way, your fingers slipped into the hole of his boxers and rubbed against the smooth skin of his length. He gasped, loud, but spoke quickly through his pants. “And in Jesus Christ, His only Son, our Lord!”

“That’s a strong start.” You said.

“Sapnap - “ He choked out. His eyes fluttered open. 


“I can’t do this.” He shook his head. “I don’t know if I can focus.” The warmth of your hand wrapping around him made him break off into small, helpless whimpers. “I don’t think I can say it!”

“Keep going or I stop.” You let go but kept your hand in the boxers. “Those are the rules.”

“But - “

Your voice was firm as you leaned in to whisper right in his ear. “Those. Are. The. Rules. Now start worshiping.”

As Karl’s voice started up again, your hand returned to hold him again. “He was conceived by the Holy Spirit, and born of the Virgin Mary…” He started to breathe hard. 

You smirked when you pulled his now-hard length out. You looked at it with hungry eyes, just itching to start doing some damage. You started by putting your thumb against his slit, digging in and relishing the moan you dragged from his lips as you did the same to the pre-cum now pooling on the tip. It beaded against your thumb, and you pulled it down to smear along the bottom vein, using it like a guide.

“He suffered under Pontius Pilate…” His voice moved up a pitch as your hand started to move up and down, using the small bit of lubrication that was present. The feeling was overtaking him and it made your own cock push against the denim of your jeans. Damn you for forgetting to wear underwear today. 

Karl’s hands flew to his face to cover his red cheeks. “...was crucified, died and was buried.”

“Hands together.” You barked the order at him louder than you expected. He obeyed instantly. His nose scrunches as you start to pick up the pace. He’s leaking more, but you didn’t gather it for lube. You just let skin touch skin, oversensitive and raw. “You might wanna pick up the pace. I don’t know how gentle I can be, baby. My patience might run out.”

“He descended into hell.” Karl clasped his hands together and winced. “On the third day, He rose again.”

“And then what, baby?”

“He ascended into heaven, and is seated at the right hand of God the Father Almighty.” He broke off into a loud groan as you started to twist your hand, using your nails to tease the head of his manhood. 

His legs spread without his control and you let out a bitter laugh, tongue between your teeth. “Look at you, Karl. You want it so bad it hurts. And what does God Almighty have to say about that?”

“Sapnap, I need - “ He started to whine again but your hand stopped. He got the message. He exhaled a shaky breath. “He will come again to judge the living and the dead.”

“Will he now?” You lean in closer to nibble on an exposed piece of his neck, above his white collar. “And how do you feel about that, pretty boy?”

“I believe in the Holy Spirit…” He threw his head back and gasped as your teeth graze his throat.


“The Holy Catholic Church…”

Your hand sped up. “Yeah?”

“The communion of saints.” He muttered out, his breathing coming out more and more ragged. “The forgiveness of sins!”

You wanted to say something sarcastic, something dumb. Maybe some play on the word ‘sin’. But your mind was overtaken by the music from Karl’s lips. His eyes stayed shut, and his hands stayed together, and your hand just kept moving. “Finish it off for me. Finish for me.”

“The resurrection of the body...and...and - “ His head turned to nuzzle against your cheek. “And, and, and, and - “ He just kept repeating, over and over.

“Karl. Finish.” You whispered lowly.

“...and life everlasting!” He barely managed to form the words before cum was coating your hand, warm and sticky and pearlescent like the shiny paint on the statue by the altar. He went limp against you, his hands now searching for a grip against your shirt. You soften, just a bit, and wrap him up in your arms after helping him zip himself back up.

And you totally didn’t wipe your hand on the back of his sweater.

“How are you feeling, baby?” You whispered.

A contented noise responded.

“Are you tired?”

He shook his head. He pulled away, his lips colliding with yours, and you grin into it. The way he moved and felt when he kissed you was easily one of the best parts about being alive. Your lips fought back and you both were grabbing, trying to hang onto anything.

He was the one that slipped from the pew on his own volition. You didn’t have to guide him or ask. He knew, because he always knew. He could read your mind. He always knew what you wanted. You followed him with your lips, kissing him as he crawled his way between your legs and started to paw at the bulge in your pants. 

“Yeah?” You finally break the kiss and sit back up, adjusting so you were seated on the edge of the pew. “You sure?”

“Might as well.” Karl said back. He looked up at you and you knew there was so much he wasn’t saying. But you were one hundred percent on board. You knew how he worked - your lovely, endlessly gorgeous boyfriend was better at tell than show, but do was even better than both of those. He would bring you coffee unprompted, play with your hair, paint your nails, make your bed. He would do kind things any chance he got.

And that included your favorite form of favors.

You helped him in pulling out your cock. His hand was dwarfed by it, but that didn’t stop him from starting to stroke you without any hesitation. You groaned and slumped down to get comfortable.

“Sapnap?” Karl asked. His purple eyes darted around. “Still keep an eye out, okay?”

You nodded. “I’m not an idiot.”

“Yeah?” Karl said. “I could refute that.”

“Shut up.” You nodded towards your hips. “Get to work.”

And he did. He started by teasing the head with his tongue, flattening down and letting inch after inch slowly enter his mouth. He then pulled away and swirled around the head, using his tongue to pull apart your slit and taste your salt. You were holding your breath without realizing it, too enraptured by the view of his lips wrapping around your member and his head moving up and down, up and down, matching the speed of his hand.

“That’s it, baby.” You leaned back and pushed his hair out of his face. “Let me get a good look at you. Let me see your eyes, pretty boy.” He slowly opened them and tried to look up, the strain making him water. That made you let out a groan. “That’s right. Look at you. My little boytoy with his lips around my cock. That’s hot as shit. You’re so fucking sexy.”

Karl’s eyes slammed shut again as he continued to work his hand and bob his head. His tongue moved in a sloppy, juvenile way but it made you feel so fucking good. You placed a hand on the back of Karl’s head and lowered him, slowly but surely, until his nose was buried against your hair and his throat was flexing around the shaft. You let out a hiss of satisfaction, that turned into a moan when Karl started to struggle and let out choking whispers. 

You lifted up his head, freeing his throat. Your member slipped from his mouth and left him retching. “Are you okay?” You asked. 

He nodded, drool dripping from his swollen lips. He was so beautiful like this. You bent over and pulled him up by the chin. After capturing him in a long, languid kiss, you pulled away and grabbed his hair. His soft blonde locks tickled your skin. The look he gave you - of trust, of care, of utter adoration - never faltered once. He didn’t try to speak, though. He didn’t let out a word. 

“Tap my knee if I’m doing too much.” You said. “I’m not planning on taking it easy. A mouth as pretty as yours deserves to be fucked. Hard.”

Karl nodded again. He opened his mouth wide before you said anything, and you guided him back to your dick. He took you, no waiting needed, and let his neck go limp. That’s when your hand in his hair would finally come to be useful, and you tightened your grip before starting to use his mouth like a toy. “Take me. Fucking take me. Fit all of me in your throat. Good boy, Karl, good fucking boy!”

His eyes shut and you tried to keep yours open. You wanted to see all of it. You wanted to watch this beautiful creature take every inch you had to give. The stained glass windows created streaks of purple and orange across your lap, that reflected on the stress-tears that started to pour down Karl’s face. He was choking, gagging, but he never asked to stop. He kept going. He sucked and licked and kept up a momentum that was so painfully wondrous that your skin was crawling. He didn’t even ask to stop when finally, finally, you started to buck your hips because you were seconds away from finishing.

“Baby, I’m going to cum. I’m going to cum and you’re going to swallow any last drop, got it? Beautiful boy, with your perfect, tight throat.” You started to feel the tingle, the pleasure growing and growing and spreading up your spine and down your legs. “Fuck, baby, yes!” You held his head down with both hands when you came, feeling the thick strands of white viscous fluid escape your cock and hit the deep walls of Karl’s frail throat. 

When you let go, Karl pulled away quickly and spent a moment gagging and coughing. You felt guilty you couldn’t offer him water. You packed yourself away, zipping up and smoothing out, and then reached down to help Karl get from the dirty floor onto your dirty lap. You held him, his head on your shoulder, and rubbed his back. “Good boy.” You muttered into his forehead before kissing him. “You did so good.”

You all spent a moment holding each other and kissing each other gently, lightly. They were little fairy kisses, full of giggles. You could feel his cheeks getting warm against yours. You pulled away and grinned. His face was bright pink. 

You leaned in and brushed your nose against his. “You’re so nice to look at.”

“Didn’t you say people were waiting for us?” Karl managed to stammer out. 

You shrugged. “Let them wait.”

Karl giggled and adjusted himself so he could sling an arm around your shoulders. “You’re a disaster.”

You nuzzled your face into his neck and kissed along his jaw. “Yeah, yeah. Tell me something I don’t know.” He turned his head and you met in the middle for a soft kiss. “Now can we please leave this stupid church? I feel like I’ve aged a million years in this stupid prison.”

Karl stood up first and you followed. As he walked towards the exit, you watched him. He was pretty while he walked, and the sun shining through the windows reflected perfectly against him. He was such a colorful little spark. Just looking at him brought a dopey smile to your lips.

“You walk so damn fast.” You called out. “You’re like a rat or something.”

“Then hurry up!” He stopped and held out his hand.

You smiled. And you walked faster, and you took it.