Work Header

The Homestuck Character Support Group (Volume 2)

Chapter Text

Initial note and guideline:

As you might have noticed, my story Calliope's Update Girl has gotten quite popular over the months. In addition, you might have noticed that I've been writing self-inserts of my various fans into the earlier "stages", to give the Homestuck fandom, prominently featured in the story, more dimension, so its members aren't nameless generic fans of Homestuck. However, these were mostly my older fans (for example, scatteredPhilosopher has been a fan of mine ever since the days of Calliope and the Final Update), and the newer fans might feel left out. As well as that, reader-insert fanfics were, as of recently, one of my favorites, but I found that they always needed to assume something that won't be true for all readers, and wanted a story that would actually have my readers, even though they were particular examples and not general images.

To help both of these issues, and also to give Calliope's Update Girl a better feel so it isn't bound to the Homestuck characters reading Homestuck, I've decided to start this story, in which the Homestuck characters that are not presently reading Homestuck will be hanging out, and in which I might act out your romantic fantasies with your favorite character. Perhaps the romantic fantasies will end up being a part of Calliope's Update Girl?* Who knows, really.

Note that only down-to-earth self-inserts are allowed. No fictionalization is allowed (that means no trolls, no people with extraordinary backgrounds like Jade, and no people who wouldn't fit in the real world). That said, "unique snowflake" Tumblr folk will most likely be accepted. If I have an issue with your self-insert, I'll be sure to note it to you personally, and we'll see if we can work the issue out.

Backstory for everyone:

ASBusinessMagnet is the author of a fanfic called Calliope on the Update Gravestone. (Named after an early Lithuanian translation of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, the name of which literally translates to "Charlie in the Chocolate Heaven") Despite the similar names, though, it should not be mistaken for Calliope's Update Girl; one could tell by the first sentences. That story now takes place in an alternate version of the Homestuck fandom that never got as popular as ours, seeing as Ryan North never found Andrew Hussie in that universe. Therefore, even outside details of Calliope on the Update Gravestone won't be familiar to us; for example, a story named The Homestuck Character Support Group still exists, but only focuses on the canon characters, not allowing self-inserts.

The fanfic in question has already attained a mini-fandom, of which all the members hang out on a Pesterchum memo, named "#homestuck_character_support_group" after the memo in Calliope on the Update Gravestone. They have already become somewhat close friends, and therefore ASBusinessMagnet has been keeping up the fanfic for them. What they do not know, though, is that in the background, several Homestuck characters in their real life are actually considering the idea of a Homestuck Character Support Group, and the two groups are about to clash in a single place...

Without further ado, here is the

Submission form: (be sure to delete the stuff in parentheses before filling it out)

Submissions are no longer accepted; this is only kept for historical interest.

Username: (enter at least one; mark a dash if you don't have the other one. Fans without an account on either site will not be accepted)
* FanFiction.Net:
* Archive of Our Own:
* Tumblr:
Chumhandle: (this is what you'll be known as in the story; if your username on either site is already in the form of a chumhandle, this will be automatically filled in)
Color: (hex code preferred, but a simple named color will suffice)
Appearance on chatlogs: (typing manner + personality; you might give examples of your chatlogs to help the cause)
Birthdate: (so I can derive your age at various scenes. As a PSA, the Earth-residing Homestuck characters were born on either December 1995 or April 1996, and the trolls are of similar age)
Preferred pronouns: (so the gender issue is simplified)
Location: (down to the city or a lesser-known country; note that non-US/Canada residents will only interact with the characters/other self-inserts via the group memo and/or private chatlogs)
Hobbies: (what you can be expected to do in your free time; in case I want to write a scene from your perspective)
Additional notes (if any): (anything goes, as long as it's nothing offensive)

Accepted characters: (you can also use these as examples)

* FanFiction.Net: ASBusinessMagnet
* Archive of Our Own: ASBusinessMagnet
* Tumblr: istrige-namuose (main), calliopes-update-girl (for the story)
Chumhandle: aperturescienceBusinessmagnet
Color: #4040ff (64, 64, 255)
Appearance on chatlogs: Types with perfect spelling and grammar, except when he omits periods
Usually down-to-business and almost never shows emotion, but is prone to derails of the conversation nevertheless
Almost never uses smileys, therefore, when he does, it immediately appears to be more suspicious
Birthdate: April 30, 1996
Preferred pronouns: he/him/his
Location: Lithuania
Hobbies: has seen a lot of the Internet on his wing, therefore his interests may not entirely be compatible with each other. Those include learning languages (in particular on Duolingo), writing fanfics (sometimes even trollfics), translation (in particular of Homestuck), making Hitler parodies (in the past, and it will usually not come up in conversation), and very occasionally visual arts and music. As such, he is quite busy on the Internet, and jokes about having "no less than 5 current projects at all times".
Additional notes (if any): Oh, come on. Did you really think I would not include my own self-insert in this?
Additional notes x2 COMBO!!!: For the purposes of this story, I did not author Calliope's Update Girl or The Homestuck Character Support Group in this universe. It would just get too meta if I did, and we already have a meta as fuck character in the fanfic (Andrew Hussie). For what replaces Calliope's Update Girl in this universe, see the backstory.
Additional notes x3 COMBO!!!: You might have read about my coming out as a trans girl on January 13, 2015. Despite this, my character here is going to remain male, and I quote, "simply because I don’t retroactively change fics to reflect people coming out as trans."

* FanFiction.Net: scatteredPhilosopher
* Archive of Our Own: -
* Tumblr: ?
Chumhandle: scatteredPhilosopher
Color: #85ff75 (133, 255, 117)
Appearance on chatlogs: Generally proper grammar and punctuation, occasionally starts to not even bother with capitalization and punctuation but spelling remains correct
Birthdate: December 5, 1999
Preferred pronouns: she/her/hers
Location: Richmond, Virginia, United States
Hobbies: likes to read and write, as well as draw. Generally prefers not to venture outdoors unless she has to, but when she does, she likes to take walks. Cooks a little bit but isn't that great at it.
Additional notes (if any): Since scatteredPhilosopher's insertion into Calliope's Update Girl precedes this form, once I wrote the form, I PMed it to her and asked her to fill it in retroactively and as of December 24, 2014, she finally did it. Perhaps Christmas miracles do happen.

* FanFiction.Net: MeAndMyReflection
* Archive of Our Own: -
* Tumblr: crawavesse
Chumhandle: unstopableSmiley
Color: #0b188f (11, 24, 143) (specified as "dark blue")
Appearance on chatlogs: Even though she is a non-native speaker of English, she tries her best to introduce casual speech, even though it might be mixed in with improper spelling/grammar (and often finds herself mocking improper spelling/grammar).
Almost always ends sentences with an exclamation mark! or an ellipsis...
Often mistaken for a man because of interest in typically masculine activities.
Typically curious, prone to mood swings and always trying to see the good side of people.
Sometimes changes names so they end with either "-y", "dude" or "bro", e.g. Johny, Davey, Eridan dude, Hussie dude.
Birthdate: October 21, 1997
Preferred pronouns: she/her/hers; he/him/his (when mistaken for a man)
Location: Indonesia
Hobbies: associated with video games but short of money, therefore she plays free online games and watches obscure gaming YouTubers. Also interested in theories, Slenderverse series, psychology, drawing and writing.
Additional notes (if any): She is quick to believe that the Homestuck characters are really Homestuck characters, even though usually she is half-suspicious. Originally hates Dave because of his personality, but then switches to liking him because she finds out he really does care about his friends. Praises Hussie as a god, but because of him she is afraid of horses.

* FanFiction.Net: PKRS
* Archive of Our Own: -
* Tumblr: arsoniccatnap (old)
Chumhandle: savvyKiddo
Color: #6600cc (102, 0, 204)
Appearance on chatlogs: Uses near-perfect grammar and syntax, but will often eschew this in favor of being casual. And sometimes will add two question marks at the end of a sentence to add a questioning tone to things?? Likes to use smileys or abbreviations when she can. :D
Usually replies to things she doesn't know how to reply to with a cheerful whoop or a dejected "oh", depending on what's more appropriate for the situation.
Can sometimes be unpredictable with switching topics, and apologizes too much.
Birthdate: April 17, 1997 (not an actual birthdate, but rather a lie that she tells)
Preferred pronouns: she/her/hers
Location: United States (likewise, deliberately not as detailed)
Hobbies: writing, listening to music, reading way too many things... yeah. Also likes pie.
Additional notes (if any): Pretty open to others' beliefs and accepting of weird events. Very easygoing.

* FanFiction.Net: davespritenotdave
* Archive of Our Own: -
* Tumblr: davespritenotdave
Chumhandle: draconianNeptune
Color: #ffae1a (255, 174, 26)
Appearance on chatlogs: types in lowercase because hes lazy. there are periods.
tends to use alot of smileys. the generic ones at least :p when there are smileys the period tends to dissapear
also very exited and childish because who needs growing up :p
misspell words alot then tries to fix them resulting in slow (somewhat) responses
is actually pretty good at english for a dude in a not that much english speaking country.
Birthdate: February 4, 1998
Preferred pronouns: he/him/his
Location: The Philippines
Hobbies: Mostly spends most of his time on the Internet (i.e. Tumblr), unless there is no Internet connection. In that case, he's usually drawing (on paper) or reading a book or just watching any fantasy/adventure movie.
Additional notes (if any): He's usually pretty lonely because most of his friends are either from the Internet or from another part of the country. Also, he likes animals a lot and has 3 dogs. He has been called naïve more than once in his life (and he doesn't think it's going to stop anytime soon).

* FanFiction.Net: cryptologicalMystic
* Archive of Our Own: cryptologicalMystic
* Tumblr: cryptologicalmystic
Chumhandle: cryptologicalMystic
Color: #7000c6 (112, 0, 198)
Appearance on chatlogs: Irregularly switches back & forth between excellent grammar and txtspk, usually hitting a middle ground wherein some words are abbreviated (usually the ones that are homophones of numbers or have easily accessible symbol equivalents like &, @, #, %, etc.), the rest are spelled perfectly, and near-perfect grammar is used otherwise. Will use emoji/emoticons as well.
Birthdate: sometime during 2000
Preferred pronouns: she/her/hers
Location: one of the southeastern states of the United States
Hobbies: Tends to spend most available time on Tumblr; when she isn't, she's either reading online or working on her fanventure, which is like how Homestuck might have turned out if all the characters had opposite personalities and classpects. She's also a good artist (specifically with drawings). However, she tends to get distracted easily, which leads to procrastination.
Additional notes (if any): -

* FanFiction.Net: Linda065cliva
* Archive of Our Own: -
* Tumblr: ?
Chumhandle: genericTranslator
Color: #6a006a (106, 0, 106) (same as Eridan Ampora)
Appearance on chatlogs: usually types not using any capital letters except in names. sometimes does typos, but that's just when she's hurrying to write on her phone, which has a touch screen can barely use XD uses the XD emoticon a lot. really a lot. XD
Birthdate: August 3, 1997
Preferred pronouns: she/her/hers
Location: Switzerland
Hobbies: draws a lot, as if it were sort of an addiction, and loves writing. She sews her own cosplays and she's often quite stressed out because she stresses myself a lot with trying to do many things at the same time. She tends to get herself really busy over lots of things and she easily gets a headache. She loves hanging out with her girlfriend, who is also a Homestuck fan and they talk a lot about it.
Additional notes (if any): She kind of adores Hussie for the way he writes, but she wouldn't faint if I were ever to meet him. Though, she likes all the characters without despising or liking someone more. She'd probably faint if she were ever to meet one of them in person, though.

* FanFiction.Net: gsunny6
* Archive of Our Own: gsunny6
* Tumblr: gsunny6 (little-used)
Chumhandle: gsunnyDragonlover6
Color: #aa55ff (170, 85, 255)
Appearance on chatlogs: omits some letters, but does place apostrophes, otherwise types with perfect grammar, even when slang and web abbreviations are used. ('round, somethin', etc.)
Birthdate: June 10, 2002
Preferred pronouns: she/her/hers
Location: Verona, Wisconsin, United States
Hobbies: drawing, reading, and playing video games. She only RPs as herself, the Rogue of Space, if ever. I guess Drama Club is a hobby? Usually off-line do to everything from school to Girl Scouts to the "awesome science thing in UW-Madison".
Additional notes (if any): -


* In case you were wondering; yes, this story and Calliope's Update Girl are canonical to each other. The only works that are non-canonical to these stories are those which contradict either one of the stories or the real development history of Homestuck (e.g. Calliope and the Final Update, Inception of a Masterpiece).