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if you stay forever, let me hold your hand

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“A documentary!” Yu Zheng beams at them, waving their contracts in the air. “They’re going to be filming you guys every day for two weeks, from 9 am to 8 pm!”

There’s a murmur of protest, a few glares.

“It’s good for marketing!” When that hadn’t worked, Yu Zheng had dropped the excited tone. “You’re all getting paid extra.”

The next day, an entire team of cameramen - on top of the team shooting for the tv show - appears on set.

“Are they… going to follow us around for two weeks?” Jinyan watches from afar, her brows furrowed. “I can’t believe this.”

Next to her, Qin Lan sighs, downing the last of her coffee like it’s a shot of tequila. “It’s going to be a long, two weeks.”


@yanxi_Freak: They’re starting a documentary!! Get ready everyone!!

@four_kitty_: @QinLan, @Wujinyan, @ShehShiman, @NieYuan, @XuKai, @LawrenceWong. So excited!!

@lin_dajay: Who knows what goes on behind the scenes… ;))


“You’re wearing that to set?” Jinyan is propped up on her elbows, watching as Qin Lan dresses.

Qin Lan furrows her eyebrows, glances down at her outfit, and then back up to Jinyan. “What’s wrong with it? It’s what I normally wear.”

“The documentary’s starting today,” Jinyan reminds her. She tugs the sheets tighter around her naked body as the air conditioning switches on. “You should go for something more… exciting.”

It’s not that Qin Lan looks bad - even in jeans and a sweatshirt, Qin Lan looks like she could go walk the runway at a Paris fashion show and be listed as top outfit.

Still, Jinyan stands, clutching the sheets at her chest. She flicks through Qin Lan’s closet, laying a few items of clothing onto the bed. “There.”

Jinyan turns to grab clothes of her own, and when she turns back, Qin Lan has stripped down to her lacy, black lingerie, and Jinyan feels her mouth begin to water at the sight.

Qin Lan looks up, meeting her hungry gaze, and immediately steps back, her eyes wide. Jinyan prowls closer like a predator stalking its prey, and Qin Lan can do nothing but back away until her back hits the wall behind her.

“No. We do not have time, Jinyan -mmh…”

They abandon the conversation in favor of… other things.


They arrive at the set separately, deciding it’s best to keep their relationship private, though Jinyan isn’t sure how long that’s going to last.

Qin Lan, of course, is a natural at reality television. Jinyan doesn’t even know why she would have thought any differently.

Qin Lan has her warm smile on, the one that makes Jinyan all tingly even though she’s watching through the screen of her phone.

“Our entire cast is very excited and grateful for this opportunity.” Qin Lan smiles at the camera as her hairstylist begins to place the delicate flowers into her hair. “To all the fans out there, we love you.”


@bing_long46: We love you, too @QinLan! <33

@blackhill7: Did you see @QinLan’s outfit? 🔥🔥🔥


“Told you,” Jinyan says, handing Qin Lan a cup of coffee as she scrolls through her feed. They’re alone, for now, the cameramen off to harass someone else. “Though, you do look a lot better naked.”

Qin Lan throws a sugar packet at her head.


It’s too easy to forget about the cameras.

They’re clustered in the lounge that night - Nie Yuan, Shiman, Guanyi, and Qin Lan - Twitter broadcasted on the tv as they scroll through tweets and fanmail.

Jinyan and Xu Kai aren’t here tonight, off to shoot some midnight scene, and so, instead of burrowing into Jinyan, Qin Lan nuzzles up against Guanyi.

It’s really not a big deal -- Qin Lan is notorious around set for her love of cuddling, and they’ve all been the target of her cuddles at least once. Everyone just kind of… goes along with it.

So nobody finds it strange when she wraps herself in a fuzzy blanket and tucks herself right into Guanyi’s arms. Guanyi doesn’t even look twice, just wraps an arm around her waist and tugs her into his chest as they read through a fan letter.

Halfway through ten, Qin Lan is already asleep, her head in Guanyi’s lap, and he’s running his fingers through her hair, gently brushing out the knots.

It’s domestic and normal and none of them even realize that it’s happening until the tweets flowing in.


@pocketpick4: I CANNOT. THE WAY SHE JUST SNUGGLED RIGHT UP AGAINST HIM. THE WAY HE WAS PETTING HER HAIR WHEN SHE WAS ASLEEP. THIS IS TOO CUTE!!! @QinLan @WongGuanyi

@laminated_banana: I knew there was something going on between them… :))

@killer_beehive: So freaking fluffy and adorable and omg uwu @QinLan @WongGuanyi


Qin Lan is freezing, and the one day it’s cold, they’re shooting outside. There’s a sweatshirt draped across the couch, and it looks so, so warm.

It’s obvious that it’s Xu Kai’s - nobody wears neon green anymore except him.

She makes a note to remind Xu Kai that neon green is out and it’s now olive green, but she slips the hoodie on anyway.

It’s huge, reaching almost to her knees, and she has to roll the sleeves four times so that they’re not hanging off her wrists, but it’s warm and comfortable and smells like grapefruit, so it’s really a win-win.

She heads back out to set in the hoodie, and nobody looks twice.


@WizardofNarniacalStreet: Uhh… Is that @XuKai’s hoodie? @QinLan

(Picture -- Left: Xu Kai in the green hoodie; Right: Qin Lan in the green hoodie)

@tyke_drop: THE SWEATSHIRT IS LIKE A DRESS ON HER OMG AND THE ROLLED SLEEVES THAT’S SO FUCKING CUTE

@friedfrench_fries: Does the sweatshirt smell good? ;) Adorable. @QinLan @XuKai


Jinyan doesn’t like these tweets, and debates typing a very strongly worded response that would have sounded something like: “Fuck off. Qin Lan is mine.”

But then:

All of them are there, miraculously, and the cameramen are off at some meeting.

“So you guys don’t want to come clean… yet.” Xu Kai cocks his head to the side, considering.

“You know you guys should, like, kiss or something at the end of this documentary. It’s going to have to come out one way or another.” Guanyi passes the salt to Qin Lan. “And that would be epic.”

“You know what?” Nie Yuan leans forward, and there’s a spark of mischief in his eyes. “We could have fun with this.”

“Oh?” Shiman and Nie Yuan have matching grins on their faces as they turn to the couple in question.

“We could throw them off -- pair Qin Lan with all of us so that their so, so confused.” Nie Yuan smirks. “What do you think?”

Qin Lan nods, and then Jinyan nods, and suddenly, they’re no longer a group of actors, but a group of havoc-wreaking, evil masterminds.


It’s movie night -

(“You’ve never seen The Sound of Music?” Nie Yuan looks aghast.

Guanyi shook his head, and the group burst into song.

“How do you solve a problem like MARIAAAAA…”)

- and hence, started Friday night movies.

Qin Lan isn’t curled up next to Jinyan, like she usually is, but instead, she’s snuggled into Xu Kai’s arms. It’s domestic, and so, very fluffy, and even Jinyan concedes that it looks perfect.

Tonight, they’re watching some black and white horror film from the 1970s, and Jinyan has to admit that it’s a little bit scary, even with a camera crew filming them all from the back of the room.

Suddenly, a monster pops out of nowhere, and Qin Lan jumps, burying her face in Xu Kai’s arms with a tiny squeal. Xu Kai’s arms immediately tighten around her, and they’re so close that Qin Lan is practically in his lap.

They don’t look the least bit uncomfortable, except maybe Jinyan is a little bit because that’s her girlfriend, but then Qin Lan peeks at her, winking, and her jealousy is gone within seconds.

They spend the rest of the night like that - Qin Lan wrapped up in Xu Kai’s embrace while the others pretend this is completely normal.

It’s so utterly believable that even Jinyan would have believed their ploy if it weren’t for the smirks that Qin Lan is throwing her way every few minutes.

And then, when the cameras are turned somewhere else, Qin Lan smirks at her, keeping deliberate eye contact as she grinds her hips into Xu Kai’s lap. Xu Kai groans a little bit beneath her, and Jinyan feels the possessiveness flare in her again.

Fucking tease. Jinyan raises an eyebrow at Qin Lan, her eyes screaming of revenge. You’re going to get punished for that.

Qin Lan raises an eyebrow, and Jinyan has half a mind to just storm over there and show her who really owns her, but then the camera pans back towards them, and Qin Lan just cuddles closer to Xu Kai.

Fucking hell.


@yutis: HE HAD A FUCKING BONER OMG OMG OMG @XuKai @QinLan

@til_ian_9: I KNEW IT THEY’RE SO FUCKING CUTE!!!!

@guns_and_daisies: DID YOU SEE THE WAY SHE BURROWED INTO HIS ARMS???? AND THE WAY HE HOLDS HER??? CHEF’S FUCKING KISS. @XuKai @QinLan

Gif (Qin Lan burying herself in Xu Kai’s arms at the jumpscare).

-- @Pinstripes_dots replying to @guns_and_daisies: we’ve lost her, boys :( @QinLan


Tonight is Shiman’s turn with Qin Lan. It’s as lovey-dovey as possible -- a dinner date at one of the fanciest restaurants they could find.

Jinyan, Guanyi, Xu Kai, and Nie Yuan are situated in the lounge. They’ve decided to watch tonight’s live stream of Qin Lan and Shiman’s date, maybe even do some tweeting of their own.

Guanyi is playing Xu Kai in what might be the most intense game of Monopoly that Jinyan has ever seen, and Nie Yuan provides commentary from where he's perched on the couch while they wait to critique Qin Lan’s clothing choices for tonight.

Guanyi flips over a Chance card, groaning when he sees the go-to-jail icon. “This can’t be right. This is the fifth time I’ve been to jail.”

Xu Kai just smirks, propping his feet up onto the coffee table.

Guanyi is still complaining as he moves his piece to the board, and Xu Kai is laughing as he rolls the die.

There’s the sound of heels clicking on the wooden floor, and all eyes turn to the door in anticipation. The room falls completely silent as Qin Lan walks in.

The dress Qin Lan is wearing must have been made to be ripped off because that’s all Jinyan wants to do right now.

It’s a little, red thing, tight, low-cut, and short, and it’s making Jinyan’s mouth water from just looking at it. And with the black, fuck-me stilettos? Jinyan never stood a chance.

“How do I look?” Qin Lan sounds almost timid and does a small spin for them.

Obviously, she’s failed to notice that the entire room is staring with glazed eyes and jaws dropped low enough to brush the floor.

“You look hot,” Guanyi croaks out. He’s leering at her in a way that, if Jinyan weren’t doing the same, she might have ripped his head off. “Really, really hot.”

Qin Lan blushes, and it’s so cute compared to the sexyfuck ensemble that Jinyan has to physically hold herself back from shoving Qin Lan against the wall and taking her right there.

There’s the sound of a door opening, and then -

“Are you ready -- oh my fucking goodness.” Shiman has stopped dead in her tracks, staring at Qin Lan in wonder. “Is this what you’re wearing tonight? Fucking hell.”

Twin flags of color rise on Qin Lan’s cheeks, and she fidgets with the hem of her dress. “Is it too…?”

“No, no,” Shiman says, her eyes wide. “It looks amazing.”

“Thank you.” Qin Lan smiles, the corner of her lips turning up. “You look really good.”

Shiman does look good, donning a power suit -- black and perfectly fitted, the cuffs rolled. And, of course, stilettos that make her a few inches taller than Qin Lan. Momentarily, Jinyan seethes quietly at how good of a couple the two of them would make. She’s not the only one who thinks that, apparently.

“You guys would be the power lesbian couple.” Xu Kai raises his hands in surrender at the glare Jinyan is shooting his way. “Next to Qin Lan and Jinyan, of course.”

“Well, we should go. We’re going to be late.” Shiman glances down at her watch, then back up at Qin Lan. “Ready?”

As Qin Lan’s about to exit, Jinyan reaches forward, tugging her back.

“I can’t wait to rip that dress off you tonight,” Jinyan murmurs softly. She cups the back of Qin Lan’s neck in a startlingly possessive manner, and Qin Lan gasps softly, shuddering.

“Get a room,” Nie Yuan shouts from the couch.

And that’s that.


“I had fun tonight,” Qin Lan says, smiling up at Shiman.

The two of them are waiting outside for the car to arrive. It had been a fun night - Qin Lan and Shiman had always been close friends, and even the less than appropriate clothing choices hadn’t hindered that.

“Me too.” Shiman leans forwards, pressing two fingers beneath Qin Lan’s chin to tilt her face up. “You have a little bit of sauce on your lip.”

Qin Lan’s breath catches when Shiman drags her thumb along her bottom lip, wiping away the last of the chocolate sauce. “There, all gone.”

But Shiman doesn’t let go of her chin, studying her face and the intense look in Shiman’s eyes has Qin Lan blinking down at the floor. Then, Shiman leans down, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead.

Shiman pulls away, smirking when Qin Lan flushes bright red. “Goodnight, honey.”


@cherry_pop_rocks: @XuKai, I think your girl might be into girls ;)

@loop_froots: YES BABES. WE LOVE AND STAN YOU. 🏳🌈🏳🌈 @QinLan @ShehShiman

@leopoldj: Oh, friendly dinner my ass. Those two are a couple if I’ve ever seen one. @QinLan @ShehShiman

@honor_rolee: THE FUCKING CHIN TILT. THE FOREHEAD KISS. THE BLUSH. SO ADORABLE. ALL MY UWUS.


It’s quiet, only the sounds of heavy breathing and quiet moans puncturing the night air. Then - “Wu Jinyan!”

“What?” Jinyan looks down innocently at Qin Lan, who’s sprawled out beneath her on the bed. Jinyan cups Qin Lan’s wet heat through her panties.

“You actually… ripped my dress!” Qin Lan moans when Jinyan bites at her collarbone. “You idiot!”

Jinyan grins against Qin Lan’s neck. She presses her thumb against Qin Lan’s clit, and Qin Lan’s hips buck against the muted contact.

“I told you I would.” Jinyan nudges her panties to the side, sliding a finger through her slick folds. Qin Lan whines, her body writhing against the bed. “Do you know how much it bothered me? Watching Shiman touch you like that?”

“She didn’t actually -” Jinyan kisses Qin Lan, effectively shutting her up.

“I don’t want to hear it.” Jinyan murmurs into Qin Lan’s hair, finally slipping a finger into Qin Lan. “Tonight’s all about us.”


They’re doing an interview promotion, the six of them, and of course, there are only five chairs.

But before she can say anything, the director is shouting that the interview is about to begin, and she’s being pushed into a chair, and for whatever reason, there’s dramatic war music playing in the background.

Then, someone yells “Go!” and she really has no choice but to start the interview and introduce herself.

They go around like they’ve rehearsed, except unlike how they’ve rehearsed, the order is interrupted because somehow, due to the lack of chairs, Qin Lan is situated in Nie Yuan’s lap.

So instead of going down in a line by the order they’ve practiced, they go down the line, then skip a few people to Qin Lan, then continue down the line.

It’s a mess, really, but Jinyan couldn’t care less because Nie Yuan has Qin Lan in his lap, an arm protective around her waist, and they’re doing an interview that’s going on live television for fucks sake.

The host says something about how cute Nie Yuan and Qin Lan are, and Qin Lan blushes, squirming in his lap as Nie Yuan throws out the most unbelievable “we’re not together” that Jinyan has ever heard.

Thankfully, the host doesn’t dwell on their relationship, or lack thereof, and moves on to talking about the tv show, and Jinyan plasters a smile onto her face when all she wants to do is throw something at Nie Yuan.


@yodeling_tent: ok but they’re actually adorable <333 @QinLan @NieYuan

@higherpowers: Awww. The way he’s holding her. (✿◠‿◠✿)

@lemon_grassmilk: They are so trolling us. Qin Lan has been with how many people in the past few weeks? @QinLan @NieYuan


It’s the last day of the documentary, the day of the big reveal.

Yu Zheng had been adamant that they all attend the Yanxi Palace fundraising gala tonight, and they’d decided that the gala would be the optimal place to reveal they’re evil masterminded plans.

Qin Lan is sitting in front of the mirror, combing through the piles of necklaces in front of her. She picks one up, holds it up to her neck, and tosses it back into the pile.

“Are you nervous?” Jinyan watches from behind her. Qin Lan is more fidgety than usual, playing with a lock of her hair.

“I don’t like galas.” Qin Lan bites her lip, and Jinyan knows immediately that she’s omitting the truth. Jinyan doesn’t say anything.

“Why not?” Jinyan leans forward, pressing a soft kiss to her cheek. “You get to wear pretty dresses. You know how much I like you in pretty dresses.”

She especially likes this one. It’s navy blue, and tight on Qin Lan’s body, accentuating every curve of her body. It’s floor-length, Yu Zheng had insisted, but there’s a slit on the left side that travels all the way up her leg.

(“Do you know why I like this dress?” Jinyan had breathed into Qin Lan’s ear in the dressing room, running a hand down her side. “Easy access.”

Qin Lan’s face had flushed bright red as Jinyan slid her hand up the skirt.

“Keep quiet, sweetheart.” Qin Lan bit hard at her lip to hold in a moan as Jinyan slipped a finger inside of her. “Wouldn’t want all those customers out there to hear you, would we?”)

Needless to say, Qin Lan had bought the dress.

“Are you worried about them finding out about us?” From the pile of jewelry, Jinyan picks out a simple, silver chain, and strings it around Qin Lan’s neck.

“A little bit,” Qin Lan admits. She reaches up, rubbing the chain between her fingers. It’s gorgeous, a piece of jewelry she never would have even considered for tonight, but somehow, it brings the entire look together.

“You have nothing to worry about.” Jinyan presses a kiss to her collarbone, grinning when Qin Lan shivers. “Why don’t I help you unwind a little bit?”


They’re a little early to the gala, but even so, the room is already alive with energy.

The cameras click as they walk in, and for the first time tonight, Jinyan feels a little self-conscious. Qin Lan’s hand is warm through the material of her blazer sleeve, and she shoots her a small smile as they walk in, knowing Jinyan well enough to recognize when she’s nervous.

She’s chosen a pantsuit for tonight, her tie matching the blue of Qin Lan’s dress, and there are swarms of reporters asking about her fashion choices, who she’s wearing, what perfume, and then -

“Wearing a tux? That’s a little… bold for a lady, isn’t it?”

Jinyan pointedly ignores that question, not even dignifying it with a glare. Next to her, Qin Lan gives her forearm a quick squeeze, as if she knows how angry Jinyan is right now. Qin Lan probably does -- sexism is like a cancer in the industry.

Jinyan is first on the red carpet, posing with the smile she’s practiced countless times in the mirror. She’s ushered forward, and then Qin Lan glides onto the stage, and Jinyan is awestruck by how beautiful her girlfriend is, and all doubt fades away.

“You look beautiful,” Qin Lan murmurs into her ear when they’ve gotten away from the cameras. It’s quiet, and it’s not really a big deal, but it means the world to Jinyan.

Jinyan has never felt more beautiful.


“How do you feel about the documentary ending?” an interviewer asks, angling the microphone towards them.

They’ve gathered out at the balcony for one last interview on the documentary, and surprisingly, Jinyan actually feels a little sad that it’s over so quick.

“Well, we’ll definitely miss all the supporters.” Shiman looks into the camera, smiling. “You guys are pretty much family, at this point.

“We really appreciate all the love and support our show is getting.” Nie Yuan shifts in his seat to move closer to the mic. “Thank you all!”

Xu Kai grins, adding, “And the tweets, we appreciate those as well.”

“We really hope you guys enjoy the show!” Guanyi turns to the camera with a beam.

The interviewer smiles. “Is there anything you’d like to add, Jinyan?”

Jinyan takes a deep breath. This is it. This is the moment. “Yes, my girlfriend and I really hope you guys like the show.” Jinyan wraps an arm around Qin Lan’s waist, pulling her against her side.

The interviewer nods enthusiastically. “Yes, a prime example of a strong friendship.”

There’s an awkward pause. And then -

“Oh, for goodness’ sake.” Jinyan cups Qin Lan’s cheek and kisses her, hard, not caring that this is going to go on national television or about everyone watching. She just wants everyone to know that Qin Lan is hers.

Distantly, she hears Nie Yuan comment, “Well, I’ll be damned.”

When she pulls away, Qin Lan’s eyes are still closed, and Jinyan runs her thumb along her jaw until they blink open. The reporter is stunned into silence, and Jinyan weaves her fingers through Qin Lan’s, smiling at the camera.

“Did you have any other questions?”


@spicy_oreos: I KNEW SOMETHING WAS UP. THEY ARE LITERALLY THE CUTEST COUPLE OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG. <33 @QinLan @WuJinyan

-- Retweeted by @QinLan @WuJinyan

@troopers_loopers: THE WAY HER EYES WERE STILL CLOSED AFTER THE KISS!! SO FUCKING PRECIOUS!!!

-- Retweeted by @QinLan @WuJinyan

@swanqueen: MY GAY HEART IS DYING RN SOMEONE HELP @QinLan @WuJinyan

-- Retweeted by @QinLan @WuJinyan

@portia_koko: I think I just found a new otp :)))

-- Retweeted by @QinLan @WuJinyan

@xrayvision: I can’t believe you guys. Trolling us like that :)) Congratulations @QinLan @WuJinyan

-- Retweeted by @QinLan @WuJinyan

@QinLan: Thank you all! Jinyan and I are so grateful for the love and support! @WuJinyan Also, @XuKai, I still have your sweatshirt, and I have no intentions of giving it back :))

-- @XuKai Replying to @XuKai: It looks good on you ;)

-- @WongGuanyi Replying to @QinLan: Do you want another sweatshirt for your collection? ;)

-- @Wujinyan Replying to @XuKai, @WongGuanyi: STOP FLIRTING WITH MY GIRLFRIEND THE PRANK IS OVER IDIOTS