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just this once

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10:34 pm; Friday



When life messes with you, it messes with you so well and thoroughly that you just can’t believe it.

Baekhyun paces back and forth, his bottom lip threatening to burst with how hard he’s been chewing on it.

Half of his mind is screaming at him to calm down, telling him that everything will be alright. While the other half is still trying to understand what is happening. Because he just cannot understand how is it possible that in one moment he had everything he wanted and in the blink of an eye it’s all threatening to slip out his fingertips.

One moment, he’s with Jongdae and they're walking down the sidewalk. Their fingers are interlaced inside the warm and nice comfort of Baekhyun’s pocket, while their voices blare off in a beautiful rendition of that prom song that’s always reserved for lovers. Baekhyun looked over his shoulder with a huge goofy smile on his face, his eyes found Jongdae as he glows beneath the dim yellow cast of streetlights. Jongdae then looked at him, with all bright smiles and round cheeks, and Baekhyun can’t help but pull him closer for a quick kiss.

Maybe Baekhyun should’ve pulled him a little longer – stayed in that moment a little longer.

Because in the next moment, Jongdae is lying on the ground; his blood pooling on the cold pavement floor. At that moment Baekhyun can’t even scream, nor notice that a motorbike and its owner crashed in the corner.




7:02 pm; Friday



“Do you think they’ll ever break up?” Irene stands beside him while she waits for the next orders to come out. Sehun doesn’t even have to look up just to see who she’s referring to.

It’s most likely Jongdae and Baekhyun being all lovey-dovey in their regular booth while they block out the rest of the world from existence.

“Do you really think they’ll let each other go after all those years of mutual pinning?” Sehun snorts. “They’re soulmates, one can definitely not live without the other.”




12:33 am; Saturday



It all unfolds in slow motion, how Baekhyun was pacing back and forth despite Chanyeol’s insistence for him to calm down. That was until a nurse asked to speak to someone and Kyungsoo volunteered himself.

The nurse, in her most quiet voice, told him that Jongdae’s rib raptured his lungs and he’s losing a lot of blood.

Even with his mind in shambles, Kyungsoo tried to school the most neutral expression he could muster.

But, with years of friendship, Baekhyun can easily read his face. He doesn’t need to say anything.

Baekhyun already understands. He stands still, his eyes wide and bleary, haunted.

Kyungsoo can see Chanyeol deflate beside him and Kyungsoo can no longer help it anymore as he croaks out a quiet, “I’m sorry.”

Baekhyun runs his palms over his face, while he breathes a small “Yah,” he runs his hands through his hair and then yells a frustrated, “YAH!” his eyes closed shut but there are tears streaming down his cheeks. “Kim Jongdae!” Baekhyun screams, and his voice carries so much pain and desperation. “Kim Jongdae! Do you really think you can do this to me?!” Baekhyun tries to enter the operating room but thankfully Chanyeol was quick enough to block him.


“Do you really think I will let you go like this?!” Baekhyun cries out, he tries to push past Chanyeol. “Huh?!” Chanyeol wraps his arms around Baekhyun, but Baekhyun relents, “Son of a bitch! KIM JONGDAE!” Baekhyun is hitting Chanyeol now, his face red and his voice hoarse. “DON’T YOU FUCKING DO THIS TO ME!!” A nurse already tried to help Chanyeol, because Baekhyun is not calming down. “MOTHER FUCKER YOU DON’T DIE ON ME!”




9:00 am; Friday



Minseok can’t help but roll his eyes at the sight of Jongdae sniffing the bouquet of roses he has on his desk, while he talks on the phone. He’s probably talking to his boyfriend. Baekhyun had the flowers delivered this morning with a card addressed as “To my future,” and Jongdae just can’t stop smiling ever since.

Baekhyun has pulled so many stunts like this that their workmates already grew tired of teasing Jongdae and just let him enjoy his flowers in peace.

But, Minseok was never one of them, so he calls out, “Yah! Kim Jongdae! Just say ‘I love you’ and hang up the phone already!”

Jongdae immediately ducks his head in embarrassment.




12:45 am; Saturday



Chanyeol flexes his arm and back just to relieve the pain from Baekhyun’s punches. He doesn’t know how they managed to get him to calm down but now he sits beside Chanyeol inside the Hospital’s mini chapel.

Baekhyun has not said a single word since they’ve come here, he just stares at his hands while he rubs them against his thigh.

An effort to keep them from trembling.

Chanyeol wants to say something, anything to give Baekhyun some comfort but it seems like the words are stuck in his mouth.

Then all of the sudden, Baekhyun goes down to his knees, hands clasped together and his eyes closed shut, “I don’t have a binding relationship with you,” Baekhyun’s voice is rough as gravel but the sincerity in it is undeniable, “and I’m not in any place to ask you for anything,” Chanyeol looks away as he blinks away his own tears, “But can I have just this one request – can you please just give me this one,” Chanyeol also goes down to his knees and repeats Baekhyun when he says, “Just this once, could you please let him live.”




11:00 pm; Saturday



Everything is hazy and drowsy.

He opens his eyes.

His head feels too heavy and the light seems too bright.

After a few blinks, the first thing he sees is Baekhyun hunched over and sleeping next to his hip. Jongdae breaks into a smile when he sees their fingers interlaced together.