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you're a fool

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     You were heartbroken. Every time he left, you waited patiently and lovingly for his return. For his warm embrace and his tales of constellations and the songs he wrote on his harmonica. Every time, you waited for him to return hoping one day—he would want to stay. Stay with you for the winter, cuddle next to the fire, share eskimo kisses, drink warm tea and play around with Moomin. Even Little My! Whatever you had to do to keep him to stay, but you never pestered him with the wishful thinking.

     Until one night. You and him laid on top of crisp, orange and red assorted leaves, looking at the sunset dusted sky. It was chilly, the end of fall approaching. You cuddled against his side, an arm loosely draped over his chest with red cheeks. He whispered stories of adventures from his isolation, the lessons he has learned over the years, the stars and hopes that connected Moominvalley. The two of you gazed longingly at each other, sharing a few quips that would lead to a feather-light kiss.

     He pleaded quietly to warn him if his actions were too bold, but he was hushed with another kiss. You always loved his lips, although worn from the icy travels he's endured, the quirk added wonderfully to the calm minded, warm Mumrik. They were red and damp from the cool air, yet warm against your plush ones. The intimate moments between the two of you you hoped would last decades, and prayed to each constellation and soft wave that it would never cease. He cupped your face in his hands, tilting his head to deepen the kiss. You hummed in delight, leaning up and gently climbing into his embrace. The trees swayed with the breeze, and a fallen leaf had landed on his unruly hair— his hat resting on the ground next to the pair.

     You retreated and giggled at the peculiar leaf, and Snufkins mischievous smile did no justice in hiding his intentions. He lurched forwards, grasping your scarf and pulling you in for a sloppy wet kiss that had you both tumbling over. You laughed as he peppered your face in kisses, yet slowing when he reached your neck. A quiet moan escaped as he kissed the softest spot on your neck, and the wonderful look in his eyes made the hairs on your neck stand. His tongue gently rolled over the spot, his fangs grazing the spot earning a hum from you.

     That cold, autumn day was the start of a new chapter. The hushed low groans, the slight crinkling of the leaves below, the tender sweet phrases, and the heavy panting was covered by the seasons sounds. It was soft, sensual and made you think—that he would stay. You thought he would stay, through the morning sickness you had yet to share and the giddily plans for what could be. You prepared to tell him the news, and the offer that would change everything.

     But the day winter started, you woke to the sound of his pack zipping closed.

     You cried big, round tears at the sight of his dejected reaction and his packed items. How could he do this? Were you naive to think that you had given him enough reasons to stay? Was freedom more important than what you thought meant the world?

     "You're a fool, Snufkin" you sniffed, holding your stomach tight. "What is the use of adventure if you have no where to return and share the tale?" Snufkin gave a horrified expression in response. "My dear, what could you possibly mean? I will always return to you" he reached his hand out for your cheek, but you pushed it away. "No, Snufkin, you're a ignorant fool. You say you want freedom, when all you want is isolation and a barrier. You crave adventure, yet refuse to accept that the biggest adventure you could ever have is with the ones you love. But you're a fool, and I am too." You sobbed, slowly sitting down the the thin pristine white snow. Snufkin watched the scene play, guilt and sorrow building in his heart. His love was in despair, and it was all because of him. How could he leave? Was it worth it anymore?

     He shouldn't stay any longer. He won't leave if he stays another minute. He is uncomfortable, he can't breathe, he can't touch you when all he wants is to pull you in and stop your tears, promise he'd never leave again . He was suffocating, the streams of water flowing and your sobs were too much. He grabbed the last essential, and quickly turned around.

     "If you leave, I won't wait for your return this time" you added, finally looking at him with puffy eyes and wet cheeks. Snufkin stayed facing the opposite way, doing his damndest best to not show his falling demeanor. His crumbling mind. The build up of tears clouding his vision, the rampant beat of his heart, the emotions he wished he never showed and the vulnerability he vowed he'd never share was crashing on him-

     He ran. And your cracked sob echoing encouraged his quickening pace.