A Hoops Fanfiction. Ben, Shannon, Ron, and Opal all take the basketball team on a camping trip. Once everyone gets lost, Ben finds what he thinks is a regular house, it's really an empty house built on an Indian Burial Ground. Stuck inside the house, Ben, Shannon, Ron, and Opal must face their worst fears. Meanwhile, Matty, DJ, and their team mates try to one up each other with ghost stories.
A Narwhal Puppy Production
Kentucky Fried Horror Story
Lenwood High. Located in rural Kentucky. There resided a foul mouthed loud tempered basketball coach named Ben Hopkins. Around his town, Ben Hopkins had a bad reputation. Like Walter Matthau in Bad News Bears, Ben himself had a team of misfits that he had to coach and shape them up. In the locker room as he basketball team was playing. Ben Hopkins was on the phone with a basketball making company in Spain.
"Hello, Banderas Basketball Company? Where's that shipment of basketballs I was promised?" Ben shouted over the phone.
"Yes I am aware that you're in fucking Spain!" The phone conversation continued as Ben yelled at the basketball company.
"What do you mean I have to wait 3 weeks!" Ben ranted.
"I don't know what kind of bullshit you're trying to get away with here!" Ben shouts.
"All right.....okay....OLE!" Ben said over the phone. "The basketballs are coming in a week?.... Fine! I can wait that long....Ole!....Ole!....Ole! Adios!" Ben hangs up the phone and goes over to the gym to check on his team.
The members of the basketball team Timebomb and Bryan kept missing the baskets. Ben grew angry at the sight of that and blew his whistle. DJ, Scott, Matty, Timebomb, Bryan, Marcus and everyone else all ran to Ben. "I thought I taught you all better than this!" yelled Ben.
"We're doing your best!" said Matty. "Yes, giving it our all!" said DJ.
"Last time I checked this game is called basketball! With the way you guys play it's more like Ass-ketball!" Ben begins to rev up.
"What are you getting at here, coach?" asked Matty with concern.
"I'm trying to say is you guys are playing like warmed over shit! How do you expect to make it to the state finals playing like a bunch of fucking ass turds!" yelled Ben.
"We're sorry. We'll do better!" Marcus says. "You always say you're going to do fucking better and yet you never mother fucking do!" shouts Ben.
"Uhhh, we're still kind of new at this," said Timebomb.
"How long as it been since you all first played. Refresh my fucking memory here!" Ben said.
"A month I guess!" said DJ. "No offense coach but sometimes you treat us like we're on Dancing With The Stars." said Matty. "Or Hell's Kitchen." snickered Scott.
Ignoring Matty's insult Ben says, "I've decided! Everyday after school you will meet here and practice like there's no fucking tomorrow! Is that understood!" Ben yells at his team.
A loudspeaker was heard. The Voice on the other end was the Principal Opal Lowry. "Ben Hopkins! Please report your ass to the office! Ben Hopkins! Thank you!"
"I gotta go. " Ben said dragging his feet to the office to find out what other trouble awaited him.
Entering the office, Opal was at her desk. Beside her was Ben's best friend, Ron.
"You wanted to see me, Opal." asked Ben. "What do you think, sit down!" Opal demanded.
Ben sits down and Opal tells him, "I've noticed your team is having trouble and losing it's vibrancy."
"Yes, I already fucking know." said Ben. "If you knew then why aren't do you doing anything to make them better." asked Ron.
"I'm trying to. You guys act like I'm some kind of fucking resourceful miracle worker!" Ben said.
Ron said, "Opal has an idea I think you might be interested in. Enlighten him, Opal."
Opal begins, "Since you've been running that team ragged these past month, I was thinking maybe they all need a field trip."
Ben asks, "Field trip? How's that going to be the end all miracle fucking solution?"
"That way they can experience the great outdoors. A camping trip if you will." suggests Opal.
"Your team could get in touch with nature. Then come back rejuvenated so they can play better. What do you say?" asked Ron.
Ben reluctantly agrees to the offer. "OKay. Fine. Camping Trip it is. Only under one condition!"
"What would that be?" asked Opal.
"If Shannon can come along." said Ben. "No problem there. I can get her to come. She's dating me anyway." said Ron. Shannon was Ben's ex-wife who owned a horse ranch. Ben was on the verge of divorcing Shannon if he could just agree to sign the divorce papers. Ben still was determined as ever to win her back.
"Good, excellent! I thought you would be up to this." said Opal. "We'll get Kirk to drive us to the woods." said Ron.
"I'm going to tell my team about this. If you'll excuse me." said Ben.
Opal and Ron watch Ben as he exits the Principal's office to announce to his team that they were going on a camping trip.
* * *
Re-entering the basketball court. Ben tells his team, "All right you all listen up. Opal says she thinks the only way to get your groove back in the game is to take a camping trip this weekend."
Isaac and Scott look worried. Isaac begins, "Camping? Are you serious?" Scott added, "Not too sure about camping. Haven't you seen those movies like The Ritual and Killing Ground?" Ben screams again, "You're going on this fucking ass camping trip whether you all like it or not! We all have fears we need to overcome. And dammit, overcome the fear you all fucking will!"
'Well, he's got us there." said DJ. "Camping isn't so bad. We can tell ghost stories about rape while we're there." said Timebomb. "See? Timebomb has the right idea." Ben said. "When do we leave?" asks Matty. "Tomorrow at 8 am sharp! Be there or fucking else!" said Ben.
Getting out of the basketball court, Opal was waiting for Ben. "Made all the arrangements. Kirk will drive the school bus." Opal said. "Sounds great to me," said Ben who was going to call Shannon on his cellphone.
"Hey, Shannon, it's me! Ben! Your favorite husband! How would you like to be a chaperone...."
Opal says, "Maybe this camping trip will be just the thing for all of us to get our groove back! I can be like Stella!"
The next day has arrived. Matty, Scott, Isaac, Bryan, Marcus, DJ, and Timebomb all boarded the school bus. Isaac and Scott were terrified were terrified beyond their wits! Shannon reluctantly agreed to be the chaperone. "I'm only coming because of Ron, Ben. Don't you forget it!" Shannon warns her ex-husband. "I know. You're here and that's what fucking matters." Ben said rolling his eyes.
Kirk was driving the bus, "ALL ABOARD! Next stop, the Lenwood Forest." Ron sits next to Isaac and Scott. "You look scared. What's going on?"
"I don't like the idea of being out in the middle of nowhere..." Isaac shuddered wistfully. "What if a killer comes. You know like the West Memphis Three?" asks Scott. Ron decides to make them feel better.
"Guys," Ron begins. "We all have fears. I can assure you that your biggest fears of being alone in the woods with killers is not going to happen. Hey, Shannon, what's your biggest fear."
Shannon begins, "That my horses will get sick and die and my horse ranch will be condemned." Ron goes on, "See? Even Shannon has fears, how about you, Opal?"
"Damn, my worse fear is that Sully will come back and expose me for landing that plane in the Hudson." Opal responded.
"Let me tell you all mine. My hugest fear is that I'll have go back to the army and fight in another war." said Ron.
Ben rolls his eyes, "Do we need to turn this into a shitty ass therapy session!" "Oh Ben. Like you don't have any fears." said Shannon.
Ron tells Ben, "Why not tell Isaac and Scott what your worst fear is?" Ben gives in, "OKay. My worst fucking fear is that I'll move to Chicago and be the coach of the Chicago Bulls and I'll get rejected and have to go back to Lenwood and work in my asshole excuse of a father's fucking restaurant! Is everybody FUCKING HAPPY NOW!"
Isaac and Scott soon begin to feel relieved. "Wow. thanks for that, Ron. You too coach." said Isaac. "What fucking ever." Ben said. Scott said, "No killers in the woods. I'm cool with that." Kirk laughs at them all.
"HAHAHAHAH!! Wimps! I don't have any fears at all!" Kirk said driving the bus.
"Yeah sure Kirk. If you're not scared of fucking nothing you must be an alien, then! Like Spock from Star Trek!" Shannon boasted.
As Kirk was driving the bus, one of the bus tires runs over a pothole. In no time at all the tire was flat and the bus was swerving into a circle until it stopped.
"OHHH SHIT! Why do things have to go wrong! This is like The Sweet Hereafter." Complains Kirk.
"We're stuck in the middle of fucking nowhere?" Timebomb shouted. Matty said, "Looks like it." "We need to call for help." said DJ. Opal decides to become the woman with a plan.
"And call for help we will. Here's the rundown. Ben, Ron, Shannon, and myself will try to find a house or whatever or call a tow truck." said Opal.
"What about me?" asked Kirk. "Since we can't leave teenagers unsupervised, you Kirk will stay here and watch over them until we come back and call for assistance." said Opal.
Kirk agrees to watch over the basketball team. Ron, Ben, Shannon, and Opal walk deep into a wooded area as they all try their best to look for a house to use a phone.
"I can already see where this is fucking going." Ben rants.
"Yeah, I didn't want to spend my day like this to fucking begin with, Ben! How does that sound!" Shannon spouted off at Ben.
"Guys, guys. We need to focus and calm ourselves." Ron said. "Yes, Ron is right. This isn't the time to get all panicky and argumentative." Opal agrees.
From a distance far away, Opal sees a house. "Oh look! We're in luck!" Opal said. However, Ron, Opal, Ben, and Shannon had to trek a long way to get to the house.
Kirk tells the basketball team, "Guess we can have our camping trip here. What do you say?"
"Would've preferred the Lenwood Forest like we were promised. Guess this'll have to do for now!" Matty sighs.
* * *
Trekking through the woods. Trying to make their way to the house Opal had seen. Ben, Shannon, Ron, and Opal soon find themselves walking through tall grass.
"There's not an easier way to say this. We're fucking lost!" ranted Ben.
"Where exactly is this house you say, Opal?" asked Ron.
"I know it's there. I could've sworn I saw it." said Opal. "We believe you. It's next to impossible to see anything through this tall grass." said Shannon.
"Well this house you claimed to have seen, has fucking disappeared from sight! It's like that fucking movie The House that Vanished!" Ben shouted.
Ron tries to calm everyone down, "All we need to do is go in the same direction we're going." "That's fucking easy for you to say." Ben said.
Shannon had enough of Ben's outbursts, "I never asked to come here, Ben. You only brought me along on this shitty ass camping trip is because you have unrealistic expectations to get back together with me!"
"It's not fucking true, and you know it!" Ben spurts at Shannon. "She's with me and you'll have to learn how to accept that." said Ron. "Just sign the fucking divorce papers already!" Shannon retorted. "I'll do it when I'm good and ready." said Ben.
Opal interrupts the spat between Ron, Ben, and Shannon. "Oh look! That house I saw! It came back!" Opal pointed to the house.
It was indeed true, the house kept disappearing then reappearing. Like a mirage. Ben, Shannon, Ron, and Opal all ran to it and rushed inside while it was still there. Outside the house, a sign reads "BUILT ON AN INDIAN BURIAL GROUND."
Looking around the empty house Ben jokes, "I keep expecting fucking Buffalo Bill to show up." "Who's that now?" asked Opal. "Never saw Silence of The Lambs?" asks Shannon. "Don't believe I have." said Opal in confusion.
Ron said to everyone, "Four rooms here from what it seems. Each of us will split up, go into a room and try to phone for help. You with me?"
"Yes Ron, we're fucking with you! And don't ever say that. My asshole dad used to say that to me when I was a kid!" Ben said.
"I'll take this room." said Opal. "That's good. I'll have that one." said Shannon.
Ron enters a room as Ben enters another room. As soon as Ben searches for a phone in the room he chose, a gust of wind was heard then the door slams shut. As do the other doors to the rooms where Ron, Shannon, and Opal were in. "AAAHHHH SON OF A BITCH! Who's the fucker that slammed the door!" screamed Ben in frustration.
Running to the door to try to open it, Ben struggles to jiggle the doorknob. Ben was now locked and stuck inside. "All right. Okay. I've been in worse situations than this." Ben then tries a window. The window was barred tightly as well. "Hmmm, this is when I ask myself....what would Little Man Tate do if he were in a jam like this." Ben thinks out loud.
* * *
Despite it being in broad daylight, Kirk had a campfire built. Matty, DJ, Scott, Marcus, Bryan, Isaac, and Timebomb were none to pleased.
"Looks like we are having our camping trip after all, hey?" laughs Kirk.
"It's not the same without Ben, Ron, Opal, and that woman they're fucking." said Timebomb.
"As soon as they call for help, we'll just have to make do with what he have. When they come back, that's when the real fun will begin." Kirk promised.
"It's daytime, dude." said Scott observing the fire. "Shouldn't we wait until, I don't know. Nightfall to do this campfire thing?" asked D.J.
"You know, Timebomb is right. We ought to have waited until Ben, Opal, Ron, and Shannon come back. It's not fair that we started this without them." said Matty.
Isaac looks all over, "It doesn't matter what time of day to have a campfire. At least there's no killers out there."
"Still not over that I see." Bryan said sarcastically.
"I agree with you there, Isaac!" said Scott. "Starting without Ben, he'll never let you hear the end of it!" Matty adds on, Kirk stands up, "Listen up, team. While we wait for the others to come back for help. And hopefully a tow truck, how about we tell scary ghost stories."
D.J. says, "Yeah, sure. I'm up for that." "Anyone know any?" asked Marcus.
"Don't tell me you guys never told and heard any ghost stories." implies Kirk.
Matty goes on his iphone, "I found some here."
Isaac asks, "Which ones did you find?"
"Here's some right here about Slenderman and Jeff the Killer." said Matty.
"Sorry to say, but we don't know any of their stories." said Bryan. "So fucking what! Let's make up our own!" said Timebomb.
"Wait. Wait. Wait. Hold your shit here. Who are we going to choose to tell stories about? Slenderman or Jeff the Killer?" asks Marcus.
"Slenderman's a wimp, I say Jeff the Killer, he's way cooler!" Timebomb suggests.
"WHAT! How could you like Jeff the fucker? Slenderman is better!" said DJ.
"What's wrong with Slenderman? He's cool!" said Isaac. "Slenderman is shit! Jeff the Killer!" Scott joined the debate.
Kirk blows a whistle, "I know lets put it to a vote.
Just all calm down now." Kirk then feels a sense of fear overcome him. "How many of you like Slenderman?" asked Kirk.
"We don't need you for this, Kirk! We'll split up into teams!" Matty said.
Matty, DJ, Timebomb, go on one side. Scott, Marcus, and Bryan on another.
Kirk asks, "What are you kids doing? We should stick together!"
"We're splitting up!" said Matty. "Yeah, like those Twilight cocksuckers!" said Timebomb.
Matty, DJ, and Timebomb shout, "JEFF THE KILLER!"
Scott, Marcus, and Bryan do the same but shout, "SLENDERMAN!"
Marcus tells Matty, "Why don't you fucking like Slenderman, Matty! I thought you of all people would like him and not Jeff the Killer."
"What difference does it make, asshole!" Matty slams Marcus. "You're tall like Slenderman!" said Marcus. Scott tells Matty, "Yeah, maybe Slenderman is your real dad!"
"HOW DARE YOU!" Matty said as he dived at Marcus and Scott. Kirk watches in a very terrified way as Matty, DJ, Timebomb, Scott, Marcus, and Bryan were all having an intensely horrible fight.
Kirk steps away, but not too far. Sitting on a treetop, Kirk proceeds to suck his thumb. "Where are you Ben? Where are you?" Kirk moaned.
* * *
Being stuck in a room in an abandoned house, Ben is about to face his worst ever fear. A portal opens before him and sucks him in. Ben then finds himself in Chicago, home of his favorite basketball team, the Chicago Bulls. "Wow! Awesome! So Fucking A! I'm in Chicago!" cheers Ben. Walking into a door, Ben finds himself in a locker room with the Chicago Bulls. "Hey, everybody! How's my favorite basketball team doing today? I'm Ben Hopkins! From Lenwood Kentucky! I am going to be your new coach from now on! Isn't that fucking cool!" Ben tells the Chicago Bulls.
Then an outcry of boos is hurled towards Ben. "BOO! BOO! BOO! BOO! BOO!" hissed the Chicago Bulls.
"We don't want no small town asshole hick to coach us!"
"You don't belong here in Chicago!"
"Go back to Kentucky where you belong, son of a bitch!"
"NO! NO! NO! Please! Don't reject me. Coaching your team is my dream come true. Never thought you guys would end up hating me without getting to know me first!" Ben protested.
The Chicago Bulls began to throw basketballs at him. Ben runs out of the locker room, only to be greeted by his father, Barry Hopkins.
"DAD! What the fuck are you doing here?" Ben yells at Barry.
"It's okay if you were rejected by your favorite team...." Barry goes onto say. "Where are you going with this?" demands Ben. Barry reaches out to his son, and grabs him by the shirt, "Don't worry, son......" Barry says then his voice turns haunted, "You always have me......" Then Barry belts out an evil fit of laughter. "Why not come work for me at my steakhouse! BWAH! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!"
"NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! ANYTHING BUT THAT!!!!! NNNNNNNOOOOOO!!!!" Ben screams in fear. Then the room turns back to normal. Ben was still feeling haunted.
In another room where Shannon was stuck in, the same portal now comes to her. "Gosh, I can't find a phone, and this portal is coming to me..." Shannon says. Sucking her inside, Shannon then sees herself at the horse ranch. "Oh, I'm back home." Shannon observes.
Walking around her horse ranch, she sees all her horses are sick. "Oh no! My prized horses! What's going on?" Shannon said. One by one, her horses were collapsing with sickness and were dying off. "NO! NO! NO! Everything I've worked so hard for!" Shannon screams out.
A car was driving down and she sees the car parking to her horse ranch. Shannon runs out to the car, "Are you the vet?" she asks. "No! We're the Health Inspection. We're going to condemn your horse ranch!" said the man in the car.
An ambulance came and took away all her dead horses. Shannon fell to the grass and cried. "WHY! WHY! WHY! Why is this happening! What the fuck is going on!" Shannon also notices, that nobody was there for her. Not even Ben and Ron. Once she sees the both of them, she runs to them for help but they ignore her.
"BEN! RON! HELP ME! DO SOMETHING! I'm losing everything!" Shannon yelled at them.
Screaming into the sky, Shannon cries, "WWWWHHHHYYYYY!" The man from the car gives her a paper.
"You're homeless now. Congratulations!" The man tells Shannon in a condescending manner. Shannon cries her eyes out until the portal brought her back to the room.
Shannon was relieved, "It was all just a bad dream. Yet it seemed so fucking real." Shannon tells herself.
* * *
Now it was Ron's and Opal's turn to face their worse fears.
Trying to open the door from which he was locked inside. Ron starts to loose it a little. "Ahhh, shit!" Then Ron stops himself. "Son of a bitch! I was beginning to sound like Ben!" Deciding to get his act together, Ron searches around the room for a phone. There was no phone to be found.
The same exact portal now was beginning to encircle Ron and engulf him inside. Ron finds himself at his house. A door knock is heard and Ron goes to answer it. "May I help you?" asked Ron. The man who knocked the door was an army solider in a uniform. "You've been drafted! We need your ass back in Iraq! NOW!" Thanks to the portal, Ron soon found himself back in the Middle East. His troop was getting killed by the Iraqis who were shouting "Death To The Infediels!" On top of their lungs. Ron makes his move and begins to charge at the Iraqis.
Getting out a machine gun, Ron tries to shoot up the Iraqis, however, Ron was out of ammo and out of luck.
"I don't have the momentum like I used to." Ron begins to bemoan. Then the Iraqis tackle Ron to the ground. Ron was helpless and could not get out of it. The Iraqis has overpowered him and made him a prisoner of war.
Soon finding himself being sucked out of the portal and back into the room. Ron breathed a sigh of relief. "What in the fuck did that come from?" Ron wondered.
Opal was in a room with white blankets over furniture. "Oh damn. This is way too fucking predictable." Opal said.
Taking off the white blankets in order to find a phone, Opal could not find one. "This is great time to forget my cellphone. Wouldn't you know!" Opal said feeling disgusted with herself.
A voice calls out her name, "OPAL!" "OPAL!"
"Who's there! You better show yourself, asshole! I kicked a lot of ass back in my day!" Opal warned the voice.
"All right. Ben if this is you so help me god....." Opal begins.
The portal then opens and swallows Opal whole. "WWWWOOOOAAAAAHHHHH!" she yelps. Opal soon finds herself at La Guardia Airport.
"What am I doing here? Is this some kind of Wizard of Oz bullshit?" asked Opal. "I don't think I'm in Kentucky anymore."
"Take a wacky guess." said the same voice calling her name. Opal turns around and she could not believe who is was. Chesley Sullenburg.
"Well well well. If it isn't my old friend, Chelsea!" Opal laughs.
"That's Chesley you fat bitch! You will call me Sully!" Sullenberg said.
"What do you want from me you twat ass!" Opal asks.
"I was supposed to land that plane on the Hudson. Not you." Sullenberg tells her.
"Yeah, you took the credit for it. Why do you care?" asks Opal defensively.
Sullenberg closes in on Opal, "I'm going to prove that it was you who really landed the plane...."
Opal begins to get scared. She was speechless.
"When it comes out that you really landed the plane. I am going to ruin you!" said Sullenberg getting an evil grin on his face.
"Why would you want to do that? My life is already ruined. I'm a high school principal in Kentucky for fucking out loud!"
"I will make damn fucking sure you will never land a job ever again!" Sullenberg tells Opal.
"What's wrong, jealous? That a stewardess saved the day and not you?" Opal spat out.
"Exactly. Stewardesses have no business making emergency landings. Didn't that movie Airplane teach you anything?" Sullenberg said.
"Never even heard of that movie." Opal said.
"Okay that's it. You leave me no choice. Nows the time for me to expose you!" Sullenberg laughs. "Say goodbye to that high school principal job!"
Opal tries to charge at him, "OH NO YOU DON'T!"
The portal spat out Opal and she was back in the room. Opal was out of breath trying to get her bearings back in order.
Suddenly, the empty house begins to disappear before the four of them. Ben, Shannon, Ron, and Opal could not figure out what happened.
"What in the fuck!" said Ben. "Did either of you had anything that seemed like bad dreams!" asked Shannon.
"I did!" said Ron. "As much I hate to fucking admit it. I did too." said Ben. "What was yours?" asked Shannon.
"That the Chicago Bulls fucking rejected me and I had to go work for my fucking asswipe of a father!" Ben said.
"Mine was that I was back in the Middle East and this time I had no power to save my troops." said Ron.
"What happened to me was all my horses for sick and died and my ranch was condemned." said Shannon.
"You all think you had it bad? Mine was running into Chelsea and he threatened to expose my ass!" Opal said in a sassy manner.
"Now that the house is gone, let's go back to see if Kirk and the team are okay." suggests Ron.
"Fucking brilliant idea, genius! Why didn't I fucking think of that!" Ben ranted.
Ron sees a sign, "This could explain what we went though." The same sign outside the house. "It was built on Indian Burial Ground? Damn!" Opal said.
"No wonder we were all having weird dreams. Like there was a reason for us to come to this house." said Shannon.
"You're right my love. When we entered and got stuck in all the rooms trying to look for a phone, we all faced our biggest fears." said Ron.
"Wow! You could be onto something there, Ron! After what we all went through we ought to feel more empowered!" said Opal.
"I feel awesome!" said Shannon. "Enough! Let's just run fucking back to where the fucking bus broke down." said Ben.
Ron, Ben, Shannon and Opal all ran across the tall grass from where they came. The four of them ran back to where the school bus still had a flat tire.
What they see is the basketball team in a fight. "SLENDERMAN!" "JEFF THE KILLER!" Kirk was still sitting on a tree stump sucking his thumb. Kirk was throwing up.
"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE!" screamed Ben.
Matty stops the fight, "Oh look. Coach is back!"
Scott, DJ, Marcus, Bryan, Timebomb, and Isaac all stopped fighting as well.
"Tell us how this started, Kirk!" said Shannon.
"I dunno. All I did was start a campfire and they wanted to tell ghost stories. Then Matty found some characters on his iphone. It turned into a fight. A fight I could not stop...." Kirk was reduced to tears.
Timebomb said, "Guess we fought for nothing." Isaac implies, "Worse than facing any killer." "I feel so ashamed." DJ joined in. "We should've never had a fight over some stupid fucking asshole horror characters from the internet." said Scott.
Matty uses his cellphone, "How about I call for help!" Ben agrees, "You're our best player! So you be the one who fucking saves the day!"
Calling a tow truck from his cellphone, Matty gives them directions on where to find them. Soon the tow truck came in 10 minutes and towed away the bus. Kirk was happy that the fight was over.
Everyone boarded inside the tow truck, Ben tells Kirk, "You seemed like a scared little pussy back there!"
"You not being scared of anything was nothing but bullshit!" said Shannon.
"Just like us, you faced your fear!" said Ron. "Guess you guys are right. I was lying. My worst fear was......having to stop a fight I could not stop." Kirk confesses.
"You would not believe what fucking shit we all went through.. girl let me tell you...." Opal begins.
Ben, Opal, Shannon, and Ron tell Kirk and the basketball team their big adventure in the disappearing reappearing empty house. The tow truck drove to a car repair shop and the flat tire was replaced. Ron paid for it and they were all now going on their weekend camping trip.
* * *
Coming back from the auto shop, Ben takes everyone out on their planned camping trip. In a musical montage the song Jumpstart by These Kids Wear Crowns plays as Ron, Ben, Shannon, and Opal guide the bumbling basketball team through the wilderness, gain confidence, and get in touch with nature.
When the camping trip was all over, everyone all feels a lot more vigorous, energized and fearless. The following Monday after school. Matty, DJ, Marcus, Bryan, Scott, and Isaac were playing much better than ever before.
Ben, Shannon, Ron, and Opal all watched as they could not be more pleased with the results.
"Will you fucking take a look at that." said Ben. "Camping trip was exactly what they needed." concludes Ron.
Shannon says, "Maybe in a way we needed it too." "Amen to that!" said Opal. Ben walks up to Shannon.
"Say listen, now that I'm more secure about myself, maybe we can get back together?" asks Ben.
"Keep dreaming, Ben! Ain't gonna fucking happen." Shannon says.
"Aww, shit." moans Ben. "Forget about that, look at how much improving our team did!" said Opal.
"Yeah, you're absolutely right." said Ben.
Ron blows the whistle and says, "You're all doing an awesome job!" Ben joins, "Keep it up and you're all on your way to fucking state!"
"And on your way to coach those 'fucking' Chicago Bulls." laughs Opal. "Right Ben?" jokes Shannon.
"Yes I will!" said Ben standing tall and proud. Ron says, "Just keep in mind one thing. 98% of our worst fears never come true."
"Shut up with the psychological shit and just fucking watch the game!" said Ben. "Okay if you say so." said Ron. Shannon, Opal, Ben, and Ron share some laughter as they watch the Lenwood High School basketball team play a great practice.
The Proceeding Has Been A Narwhal Puppy Production!